Work Header

A Case of Mistaken Identity

Work Text:



Ianto gave a small laugh as the Doctor finished his story. For once, he did not resent getting suck with babysitting duty. This doctor was more approachable than his previous incarnations. Plus, he was a good, if not eccentric, story teller.

"I saved her life from Lazarus and what does she do? Slaps me. I hadn't even said four words to her before she did it either." Ianto didn’t want to admit it, but he could understand both sides of the story.

"Doctor, perhaps it is simply that you and mothers don't get along," Ianto stated as he glanced at his watch. They were waiting for Amy and Rory to finish in the store. With any luck, this would be the last one for this trip and he would be able to escort the trio back to the Tardis before dinner. Jack had made *secret* reservations at the French restaurant that he liked. He wondered when Jack would realize that he did his accounts and that the French restaurant knew to call him when they needed to confirm any meetings. He sighed. The only reason Jack took him to that restaurant was to butter him up to face Unit. He shuddered to think what the man had done in the last week behind his back.

"I just don't understand why? I'm very charming," The Doctor placed his arms around Ianto, taking him out of his musing. "You think I'm charming don't you Mr. Jones?" Ianto could see the lecherous grin on the other man’s face and knew it was more in jest than in anything else.

"I don't know Doctor," Ianto smirked as he stared at the other man. The Doctor had nothing on Jack. Besides, two could play this game.  He opened his mouth to continue when a voice called out and the two quickly separated

"You bastard!" and the Doctor was slapped across the face.



Ismane Jones was walking down the streets of Cardiff with Rhiannon. She had driven down for the weekend to spend some time with her eldest daughter, grandchildren and if she was lucky her youngest son. However, as the weekend progressed that seemed more and more unlikely as he still had not answered her phone calls.

"Apparently Ianto has gone off the bender," Rhiannon stated, letting her in on some of the latest gossip. "My friend Sarah saw him at this really nice French restaurant with this man. A real looker she said. Apparently a bit of a flirt as she saw him talking to the waitress and the waiter. Sex on two legs. Her words." Ismane looked over at her daughter. To think, this was the most information about her youngest son she had gotten in ages. Ianto was skilled in having an hour-long conversation with her and not letting any information about himself come out.

"I don't know…Ianto wouldn't get together with someone like that, and that man might have been a friend." Ismane argued. She could care less if Ianto had taken up with a man. Honestly, it would have happened to at least one of her children, and of all of them, Ianto had been a more sensitive soul. Yet, to think him involved with a person who would flirt in front of him with others. It made her insides boil. "Maybe that man might be using Ianto… but he's too smart to be pulled in by some guy who'd just use him, right?"

"Mam, I'd say that too, but I'd not sure anymore. He's been so quiet about his life since he left London. I sometimes don't even recognize him when he manages to call," Rhiannon sighed. "Having a beau who monopolizes his time would explain it."

"I think you are trying to make something out of…Is that Ianto?" Ismane asked as she looked over to the other side of the street. "Do you think that's the guy?" Ismane asked.

"I think…I haven't seen Ianto look that happy since Lisa." Rhiannon stated. "But they don't look so close…oh never mind." Rhiannon paused. "He does seem like the play boy type."

"He does, doesn't he?" Ismane muttered. Images of the man using and abusing her son flitted through her mind. "And he's messing with my son." Righteous fury filled her.

"It's just rum…Mam?" Rhiannon questioned as she noticed Ismane crossing the street. "Mam!" Rhiannon's eyes widened as she watched as her fifty eight year old mother slap the man next to Ianto.


"Owe," The doctor stated as he looked at the old woman in front of him. "Who are you?" He wondered what he had done this time to get hit.

"You bastard, stay away from him," Ismane shouted as she continued to hit him with her bag. He lifted his arms to defend himself. Him, over 900 years old, being attacked by a woman with a bag.

"What?" He cried. “Stop hitting me!”

"Mam!" Ianto exclaimed as he tried to stop her. The Doctor watched as Ianto grab her arms and felt a sudden wave of dread fill him. What did Ianto call her.

"I don't even know who you are!" The doctor exclaimed as he hesitantly looked between his arms to see if another hit was coming.

"Doctor, move out of the way," Ianto ordered as he moved in front of the Time Lord. "Mam…stop."

"Ifan, love, move out of the way, I have to hurt this man."

"I don't even know you!" The doctor exclaimed again.

"Why? Mam, how do you know the doctor?" Ianto asked as even the Doctor was impressed with how calm he was with handling the situation.

"You're dating him, aren't you?" Ismane asked for once clarifying rather than attacking.

"What are you talking about?" Ianto asked with his eyebrows raised in show. "Mam, The Doctor's a friend of mine. A little eccentric, but a friend. I'm not dating him. I mean, have you seen him?"

"You know this mad woman," The doctor asked. “and hey!”

"This woman is my Mam…she thought you were Jack," Ianto replied rubbing his temple. How was he going to explain this to the team?

"Of course. People always make that mistake," The Doctor stated sarcastically.

"Stop it, or no fish sticks," Ianto stated as he looked at the doctor. "Don't make me put you in the car." He then turned to his mother. "Mam, you got the wrong person. I'm just showing the Doctor and his friends around Cardiff."

"Oh. I see…I guess it was my fault," Ismane stated. "I'm sorry. Doctor, was it?"

"Yes…apology accepted," The doctor stuck his hand out and shook Ismane's hand.

"Doctor, is everything alright here?" Amy asked as she and Rory walked out of the store.

"Everything's fine, Amy," The Doctor sighed. "What is it with Mothers?"

"Doctor, if it's any consolation. I'm not one of your companions." Ianto grinned and the Doctor wanted to smack him. This situation wasn’t funny.

"Let me see…no…doesn't help." The Doctor sighed.

"Go to the car," Ianto ordered and the Doctor could see that he was annoyed by the childish behavior he was exhibiting, but in his defense, he was mistaken for Jack. "Amy, Rory…you too." He then turned to Ismane. "Mam, sorry…but I have to get back to work. They are leaving tonight and we have a few more stops to go."


"Don't worry about the Doctor…he's more upset about the fact that you're my mam then he is that you hit him for no reason." Ianto grinned. "He has a history with his friends mam's hitting him."


"I'll call you later mam." With that Ianto walked away leaving Ismane watching him go.

"You know mam, he never denied that he wasn't dating a man. I'm kind of interested in meeting this Jack guy." Rhiannon stated.

"Yea." Ismane replied. "I'm going to have to have a long talk with your brother."


The End