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The Chat Came Back

Chapter Text

“Please don’t scream.”

Never reassuring words to hear on any given day, but Marinette found they were even more disconcerting when spoken by a very strange, very naked man sitting on her living room sofa.  Some distant part of her could appreciate the fact that this stranger was courteous enough to cover himself with one of her throw pillows.  The other, nearer, presenter part was absolutely terrified.

Marinette screamed.

The man winced, his shoulders curbing up towards his ears as if he were in pain.  He looked as if he might stand but as he rose from his seat the pillow nearly fell off his lap and he quickly sat back down.

What the hell are you doing in my house?” She said, reaching for the pockets of her skirt where she kept her wand.

“Wait, Marinette, it’s me!”

But it was too late.  Before “me” could say anything else he found himself suspended foot over ass over floor, blonde hair falling in a gravity curtain, as his hands desperately clutched her poor throw pillow to his crotch.

Chat is not going to be happy when I throw that thing out.

How do you know my name?  Who are you?  Why aren’t you wearing pants?” She shrieked, too traumatized to bother averting her eyes as the stranger slowly spun by his suspended limbs.  She tried not to ogle her intruder’s ass and focused on the issue at hand.

“It’s me,” He said, again, straining his neck to face her.  “It’s Chat.”

Marinette stared incredulously at her clearly deranged visitor.

“Chat Noir is my cat.”

“Yeah, I know.” He said, somehow managing to sound patronizing with his bare essentials floating in the air.  “Can you let me down now?  I’m pretty sure this constitutes animal abuse.”

The little witch cautiously approached her prisoner so she could catch his eyes.  She was startled to find a very familiar green sparkling back at her.

“Hi,” Chat said, sheepishly.

Marinette screamed again and dropped him to the floor.