Okay, so, it’s not like Simon hasn’t thought about it.
Because like… Bram is hot, right? Like, really, really, really, ridiculously good looking, right?
So, of course, Simon, being of sound, teenage boy mind, thinks about it. Maybe actually quite a lot.
But then there’s the whole never-been-kissed-before-this and the never-been-touched-by-another-person-before combined with a constant paranoia of what if I suck at it?
And Simon thought school was hard enough. Now he’s got all this ~sexual frustration~ to deal with.
They don’t talk about it, or at least they haven’t yet, which is okay. Honestly, Simon doesn’t know how to bring it up and he’s 99% sure he’ll just combust on the spot from sheer embarrassment if he did.
So instead, he just continues to enjoy their random makeouts, pretending like he’s not hard as a rock and sneaking off the the bathroom to calm himself down.
It’s fine. Really.
Until it isn’t.
They’re at Simon’s house, as they are most times they both have free time. (It goes unspoken between them that Simon’s parents are much more cool with having them over and giving them their space than Bram’s mom is. She’ll get there, it’s just still very new, for everyone involved.)
More specifically, they are in Simon’s bed, which technically is not new for them, as they can usually be found there whenever they manage to get some time alone and don’t have to worry about parentis interruptus.
Simon gets worked up quickly, but let’s be honest, a strong breeze could set him off these days. It’s a miracle he hasn’t come in his pants yet just from the way Bram is biting on his lip and, sweet baby Jesus, kissing on his neck like that.
With Bram on top of him, strong thighs bracketing his legs and hands fisting his hair, Simon actually is in quite the position to just… grab Bram’s hips and pull him down on him and… just go for it.
So Simon does.
Simon hooks his fingers in Bram’s belt loops and just… tugs. Bram goes willingly, then Simon grinds his hips up once, experimentally, a surprised groan escaping his lips when he realizes that Bram is hard, too.
Simon gives another tentative roll of his hips, this time earning him a moan from Bram (which if that is not the best goddamn sound Simon has ever heard) and Bram buries his face in Simon’s neck.
“Si, I’m going to come in my pants if you keep that up,” Bram breathes hotly, and his words make Simon pause.
“Oh,” Simon says dumbly, because yes, he started this, but no, he didn’t really think this through.
Bram lifts up to look at Simon and smiles, brushing Simon’s hair from his forehead.
“Look, if it’s not something… if you’re not ready for that, we can stop. Just take a breather and go about our business. But… if you want to continue… “ Bram pauses and takes a breath before swallowing and continuing. “I’m game if you are.”
Simon grins and can’t help but laugh about how awkward this should be, but really isn’t. Simon pulls Bram in for a much needed kiss and then pushes all other thoughts from his mind, focusing instead on being here in the moment with Bram.
Bram takes control of the kiss, slowing it down and settling Simon from his crazed and frantic state to something more passionate and calm. Bram coaxes Simon’s mouth open and slides a hand around the side of his neck, making Simon shiver.
Simon’s hands are currently fisted in the sides of Bram’s shirt, but he slowly unclenches them and relaxes as Bram’s tongue teases into his mouth. The longer they kiss, the braver Simon feels knowing that Bram hasn’t run away or stopped them yet. Bram wants this, too, just as much (and, God, maybe even more?) than Simon does.
With a sudden wave of bravery, Simon slides his hands from Bram’s waist over the swell of his ass and into the back pockets of his jeans. Simon can’t breathe as he grabs two handfuls of Bram’s ass, forcing Bram down on him and he moans when their hips meet again in a delicious grind.
It’s quick after that, the contact of their groins all they needed for them to finally give in and full out go for it. They don’t talk again, just allow themselves to get worked up and let it build up between them.
It all happens so fast, the way their hips grind together at a quicker and more desperate rate until Simon knows he’s on the brink. They’re no longer kissing, Bram instead gasping hotly against Simon’s neck and if the higher pitch of his moans is anything to go by, he’s about to come, too.
Simon pulls one of his hands out of Bram’s back pocket in favor of his hair, and he grips him a bit too tightly as his only signal that he’s about to let go. Bram makes a sound that can only be described as a whine as his hips stutter against Simon’s, and it’s that noise that makes Simon completely lose it.
Simon’s pretty sure he makes a pretty embarrassing sound himself as he comes, but he can’t know for sure as his mind is completely overwhelmed with a warm feeling of intense pleasure. Simon holds Bram tight against him as he tries to bring himself back down to Earth.
And then… and then it kind of sinks in that Simon has crossed some sort of invisible milestone, some sort of invisible wall and now here he is on the other side, unable to say he’s never gotten another person off before.
Sure it was just basic dry humping, but to Simon, it was like he’d crossed a major milestone in his life and can now cross off something major on his ‘Big Gay Bucket List’.
Afterwards, they just kind of lay there. Bram rolls off Simon onto his back and they both just stare at the ceiling as they try to catch their breath and come to terms with what they just did.
“That was…” Bram starts, unable to complete the sentence.
“Intense,” Simon supplies, rolling to face Bram, but upon noting his expression falter, he quickly adds. “But so good. I liked it. I… I’m glad we did that.”
“Good. Me, too,” Bram smiles and then leans in and kisses Simon breathless again.
When they break apart, Bram traces his fingers over Simon’s cheek and Simon takes a self indulgent moment to admire what Bram looks like still in his post-orgasm haze. I did that, Simon thinks, I made him look like that.
“Do you want to talk about it?” Bram asks, and Simon knows part of the reason he’s asking is because he does.
“I think we probably should, yeah,” Simon says, licking his lips and smiling at Bram. “I think we’ve made it clear that we liked it and wanted it to happen. I just… I guess the question now is… are we, like, ready for more than that?”
Bram nods, thinking about it before he answers. Simon watches him carefully, making sure he’s not panicking at all.
“I don’t want to sound cliché or anything, but I want everything to be special. You mean something to me and this… us… it’s the most important thing in my life. I don’t want to mess it up by rushing into something or one of us pressuring the other… or just doing it because we think the other one wants to or that we’re, like supposed to be doing it, you know?”
“I agree,” Simon says, nodding. “I’m not… I’m not ready for anything more yet.”
Bram smiles and lifts up to press a quick, soft kiss to Simon’s lips. They lay there for a few more minutes as their breathing returns to normal, smiling at each other softly every few moments. Simon forgets for a moment that they probably should change, so many other thoughts swirling in his head.
“Do you ever feel like… like we did things backwards?” Simon asks.
“How do you mean?” Bram asks.
“Like, I feel like most couples start with hooking up, at least that seems like how it happens nowadays. We sort of did it the opposite. We build our emotional connection without even knowing who the other person was. I feel like we… fell for each other before we even met. I don’t know. It just feels like we’ve fallen behind with all the physical stuff and I don’t want us to… like, feel like we need to rush to catch up with where we are emotionally.”
“I understand what you’re saying,” Bram says, nodding slowly. “I think as long as we’re just open and honest with each other, we’re going to be okay. I know talking about all that stuff… it can be awkward and uncomfortable to bring up, but just know that I’d rather us be upfront with each other than for us to get ourselves in a bad situation, if that makes sense.”
“I agree,” Simon says, reaching out and taking Bram’s hand in his, squeezing it. “I promise I’ll always tell you how I’m feeling.”
“Me, too,” Bram says, and then he seals it with a kiss.
“Speaking of being honest,” Simon says when he pulls back. “I think a quick changing is in order.”
Bram bursts out laughing as Simon gestures to his pants. Simon gets up off the bed and walks over to his dresser to pull out two pairs of boxers.
“It’s not weird for me to lend these to you, right?” Simon asks, tossing a pair to Bram.
“I think it’s less weird than making me go on with drying come in my pants for the rest of the day,” Bram laughs.
“Cool,” Simon nods. “Um, you can change in the bathroom first.”
Bram smiles and gets up to head to the bathroom. Simon flops back on his bed while he waits for Bram and can’t help but smile dopily at his ceiling as his mind swirls with all the great things that are to come (all the puns intended).