After Butch finally managed to break them out of the safe, Oswald thanked him and the two went their separate ways. Oswald didn’t head home, instead he let his feet lead him to the roof of a building…the same building that he had thrown Fish off all those years ago.
It felt like a lifetime ago.
Oswald remembered standing on the edge of the rooftop, yelling that he was the king of Gotham. Now he climbed up for a different reason entirely.
He thought of all the things that this city had taken from him.
His leg was damaged.
His mother was dead.
His father was dead.
Tortured mentally and physically.
Humiliated publicly and privately on multiple occasions.
And for what…for this city…for Jim…For Ed…
His vison blurred with tears and a scream built in his throat.
All his friends…all his companions…all his minions…. all traitors.
That brutish oaf Gabe.
That slimy weasel Mr. Penn.
That bitch Sophia.
That lying Victor.
Even sweet Ivy had turned on him in the end.
Was he really that awful?
Was he really that unlovable?
He had forgiven all his enemies on multiple occasions.
He even let the woman who stabbed his mother in the back and let her die in arms walk freely around the city.
He thought of Martin. The child he never knew that he wanted.
The child that he couldn’t keep…not with the life he lived and his enemies looking for any excuse to hurt him.
He trembled as a cold breeze blew through him.
He glanced down at the waters that had washed away Fish Mooney.
His enemy…his mentor…someone who saw his potential…maybe even his friend…
The she died in his arms just like his mother…just like his father.
His poor father who drank the poison that was meant for his son.
His father who Ed dug up and used as a tool for his revenge.
Making him think his father ghost was haunting him…causing him to make a fool of himself on TV.
His best friend…his greatest enemy…the love of his life…a traitor in every sense of the word.
Oswald, we’ve been through thick and thin.
Ed… the one person in Gotham who he thought that he could trust.
And I hold no grudge on you.
Ed…who was dating Lee Thompkins.
But you come against Lee and you come against me.
Oswald thought of Jim.
Jim… the first person that he thought he could trust… his first friend… and the biggest mistake of his life.
Jim who used him over and over again.
Jim who asked for favors without ever really giving anything return.
Jim who always needed his help to save Gotham city but still treated him like a common criminal.
Jim…who should have just put a bullet in his head on the pier.
Oswald breathed out slowly, his body relaxing.
Yes, he should have died a long time ago.
If he wasn’t around…then Jim would have gone to jail for his murder.
If he wasn’t around… then Jim never would have found Loeb’s daughter.
If he wasn’t around…then Jim and Harvey would have been killed by Fish Mooney’s thugs.
If he wasn’t around…then Jim never would have been reinstated as a cop by Loeb.
If he wasn’t around…Jim would have been killed by Theo Galavan’s policemen.
If he wasn’t around…Barnes would have arrested Galavan and he would have escaped before long.
If he wasn’t around…then he wouldn’t have been able to take credit for Galavans murder and Jim would have gone to jail or to Arkham.
If he wasn’t around…his Step-mother would have gotten away with murdering his father.
If he wasn’t around…the Theo would have killed Bruce Wayne, his butler, and Jim.
If he wasn’t around…Ed would have had no visitors in Arkham during his stay and probably would have been trapped there forever.
If he wasn’t around…Barbra would have been killed by the mobsters Butch hired.
If he wasn’t around…Harvey and Jim would have never escaped Fish in that mansion.
If he wasn’t around…there would have never been the Pax Penguina and the city would have spiraled out of control.
If he wasn’t around…Oswald lifted his leg to take a step.
If he wasn’t around, then Gotham would have been infected with Jerome’s laughing gas.
There were so many things that would have been worse without him.
Still, while it may have been worse for them…it would have been better for him.
So, he was going to do what so many others had tried to do. He was going take his life.
He wondered how long it would take for people to wonder where he went.
They probably wouldn’t think about him until the next time they needed him to save the city or something.
Oswald closed his eyes; hoping that his mother and Father would be happy to see him again, before he took that final step—
Grabbed from behind and tossed like a ragdoll, Oswald cried out as he landed on his injured leg.
“What the hell are you doing?” an angry voice hissed, and Oswald kept his eyes closed, curling into a ball.
Why couldn’t he ever get any peace?
“Well?” the voice demanded answers, and Oswald finally looked into the angry face of a stranger.
“What are you doing here?” Oswald asked, “Shouldn’t you be rescuing Lee from prison?”
“Never mind that.” Ed waved him off, “Why were you trying to kill yourself?”
“None of your business,” Oswald struggled to his feet, “Now if you’ll excuse me,”
“If this is because I’m dating Lee—” Ed started, but Oswald cut him off.
“I am not some lovesick teen, Ed!” Oswald growled, “Not everything has to do with you!”
Ed fell silent for a moment.
“Is this because I tricked you?” Ed said, slowly.
Oswald shook his head.
It was partly because of that, but mostly because the only act of kindness he had experienced in so long was just another act. Ed didn’t really care about him when refused to give him up to Sophia. Most likely, it
was just his stupid pride that kept him from revealing his location.
No one really cared about Oswald.
No one really wanted him around.
Well, Martin did, but most likely given time, he would turn against him to.
“We’re even now, Ed,” Oswald said, quietly, “Please leave,”
“Talk to me, Oswald,”
“I don’t want to talk to you!” Oswald shouted, “I just want to jump off the bloody roof and die! So, get the hell out of here!”
“No,” Ed said, fiercely, “I’m not going to let you kill yourself,”
“Why do you even care?”
“Because you are too important to me,”
“Please, you’d let me die in a heartbeat to save Lee,”
“So, this is about Lee,”
“This is not about Lee!”
“Then why are you trying to kill yourself?!”
“Because I don’t have any reason not to!” Oswald balled up his fist and started to beat on Ed’s chest, “Because I’m tired of being hurt, used, and left behind! I can’t keep living like this!”
“Don’t act like you care! None of you care about me!” Oswald was weeping now, “You all hate me! You all think that I am weak little penguin, the freak! My mother was right. She is the only person that I could trust!
The only one who loved me unconditionally and she dead!”
“You’re a liar! You tricked me! You are always tricking me and lying to me! What happened to being better off unencumbered? You said that love was a weakness and that’s the only thing you ever said to me that was true!”
“Loving you was the worst mistake I ever made! And I hate the fact that even after all you have done to me, I still can’t get rid of that stupid emotion!”
“Just let me die! I want to die! I don’t want to feel like this anymore! Just let me die! Let me die! Let me die!”
“I hate you! I hate you!” Oswald struggled, when Ed wrapped his arms around him, trapping him in a hug he didn’t want.
“Listen to me!” Ed shouted, and Oswald froze, “Your feelings…they aren’t as one-sided as I led you to believe,”
“What?” Oswald’s eyes narrowed.
“I do have feelings for you.” Ed admitted, “I have for a long time. I—”
Ed suddenly kissed him, and Oswald sighed into the kiss relaxing for the barest moment, before he tensed and shoved Ed away.
“I don’t need your pity!” Oswald spat, face twisted in disgust.
“It’s not pity!”
“Then prove it!”
“You’re the genius! Figure something out!” Oswald limped away from Ed, “Now, Leave me alone!”
Ed watched him go, a determined look on his face.