Sasuke was going to go insane.
He glared at the blonde—who was far too in his own head to notice, spouting off the same lines he had been hearing for years—
"But—you know—maybe it's just a rough patch, right? Lots of people have them—"
Sasuke gritted his teeth.
"—and I know she cares about me and I care about her—"
His nails dug into his palm.
"—and we've been together for so long at this point—"
Yes—the voice in Sasuke's mind hissed—Naruto included all the time that they were just taking a break as part of their relationship—
"—I just—I don't want to give up on us, you know? And—"
And Sasuke had been there, after every fight—after every time they made up—sitting by Naruto, listening to him—listening to him rant, listening to him curse—listening to him sing her fucking praises—even though all it had done was remind him that Naruto would never—he would never—he would never feel the way Sasuke—
"—it's gotta be worth it in the end, right? We're both changing—"
Sasuke's blood began to boil—the pain in his chest expanding, pushing his words to his throat—
"—we've both changed so much—"
The pain shoved the words forward.
"What do you—"
"Because I'll tell you something, Naruto," the anger burst through the pain—stifling it, overwhelming it—he let it rush through his blood, "this is the exact same fucking thing I've been listening to for the past six years. Six years of the same argument—six years of 'oh, but it's different this time'—it's never different! When has it ever been different? Give it three months, and you're going to be right back here again! I'm sick of it! I'm not your fucking therapist, Naruto—"
"I didn't—" Naruto's eyes were wide—
"You want to stay with her or not—fine. I don't care—that's your decision, but I don't want to hear it anymore. Leave me out of it—I'm done."
He let the door slam behind him as he left, fleeing as quickly as he could from those wide, wounded eyes.
Naruto let out a breath, hoping it would somehow calm the way his stomach was twisting. He shuffled his chair closer to the table—cringing as it screeched along the floor—
Maybe it was something he had needed to hear a long time ago, he considered, letting out another sigh. It had definitely seemed like something Sasuke had wanted to say a long time ago.
He stared down at the tablecloth, swallowing. The lump in his throat was back again—really, he was no stranger to Sasuke getting mad, but this…
This had been his fault.
He couldn't blame himself, really, for wanting to vent to Sasuke. Sasuke was always honest—and rational—and the perfect person to talk to when Naruto needed someone, but…Naruto had been taking advantage of that. He had been taking advantage of Sasuke.
How long had it been since he had asked Sasuke about himself? Since Sasuke had vented to him—about anything?
Besides—at the end of the day—Sasuke had been right.
It was never different.
Naruto blinked up—Sakura's face was tight—worried…they usually didn't talk so soon after having an argument like this.
"Sakura," he sat up straighter, meeting her eyes, "we need to talk."
She blinked—once, and then again—looking away—Naruto immediately stood—
"Hey, no—don't cry—we—" he looked around them—the coffee shop had been a good enough place to meet, but for the actual conversation—
"Let's go on a walk."
Sakura let out a shuddering breath. Naruto could tell she was holding back tears.
"We're breaking up, aren't we?" It wasn't a question.
Naruto looked away.
"For real, this time?" She laughed a little. It didn't sound happy.
"…we don't make each other happy," Naruto said quietly, "I'm not what you want."
"Sakura," he looked at her seriously, "I'm not what you want."
They hadn't been a real couple in months—years, even. Naruto couldn't even remember the last time they had had sex—or even…been intimate. At all. Whatever they had had when this had first begun—they kept chasing it, but—
Sakura made a pained noise, looking away.
"It's—it's just so stupid," she pushed some of her hair back, "we're so good as friends—I always think—"
"I know." He thought the same thing—every time they broke up—it took some time, but when they finally started talking again, they got along so well—it was so easy to think they could give it another try—
But each try seemed to end the same as the last.
"It is stupid," he shook his head, smiling a little, "we're stupid."
She laughed—a small, wet sound. He didn't need to see her eyes to know they were red.
"I care about you, though," he felt the need to say it—
"I know," she threw him a small smile, "I care about you too. But you're right—"
She gave a long, slow exhale.
"We're better as friends."
Naruto glanced at her, grinning a little.
"We're damn good as friends."
She laughed again, giving his arm a small nudge. It was a moment before her smile seemed to flicker away.
There was a pause.
"I'm…going to need some time, I think," she said quietly.
"Yeah," he breathed out, "yeah—me too."
It wasn't surprising that Sasuke came back to an empty apartment. Naruto seldom stayed here on his own—especially if he had just fought with someone…it was as if Naruto's gut instinct was to immediately talk to someone when he was upset.
Of course, that someone was usually Sasuke.
He swallowed, gently laying his keys down on the table. His gut was still a swirling mix of guilt and anger—and a fair bit of pain. He knew he had no right to it—the pain, that was—but he felt it nonetheless.
He closed his eyes.
It wasn't as if he had any claim over Naruto. The blonde could do what he wanted. Sasuke had no—had no—
He buckled forwards, letting out a harsh exhale in the place of a sob. These feelings—he hated them. They had been tormenting him since the moment Naruto had slung an arm around him and playfully called him an asshole—maybe even before that—
And he had no right to them.
He let out another breath, resting his forehead on the wall.
He shouldn't have lashed out like that. He didn't think Naruto and Sakura were meant to be—hell, at this point, he grew further convinced every day that they weren't—but he wasn't exactly…unbiased.
And he had never wanted to be the reason for Naruto's unhappiness.
A click—signaling the front door being unlocked—nearly made Sasuke jump out of his skin. It definitely triggered his fight or flight response, with the way he immediately fled to his room, slamming the door shut just as he heard the front door open—
He pressed his back against the door, letting out a slow, quiet breath.
That…definitely hadn't been his bravest moment.
Maybe he ought to just turn around—but the chances that Naruto hadn't heard the door slam were incredibly thin—
He both felt and heard the knock as it came.
"Sasuke," Naruto's voice was quiet…he sounded tired, "I know you're in there."
Sasuke swallowed, but the lump in his throat didn't waver. It felt as if it was nearly closed shut, it was so swollen—
"Okay," he heard Naruto sigh, "well, I'm just gonna assume you can hear me. I…I wanted to apologize."
Sasuke's head jerked up. Apologize? What did Naruto have to—
"You were right," Naruto's voice continued, "and I'm sorry for making you listen to all that crap. I won't bother you with it anymore, so—"
Did that mean that they had broken up? Or—
"Just—thanks for being so patient with me. And I'm sorry."
Sasuke's throat locked up—his mouth opened, but he couldn't make a sound—
Naruto moved away from the door.
Naruto sighed. It had been—nearly three weeks since he had broken up with Sakura, and things still felt awkward with Sasuke. Part of him wondered if the Uchiha had even heard him apologize—Naruto realized, afterwards, that he could have very easily been listening to music or something…
Maybe he ought to do it again.
But it felt like—more often than not—Naruto found himself biting down on whatever he wanted to tell Sasuke that day. He was tired and school sucked and he missed having someone to talk to—
It felt like he had lost both of his best friends in one night.
But this was exactly the type of personal crap that Sasuke obviously didn't want to be weighed down with—Naruto couldn't blame him. It wasn't exactly fun to hear him complain…
It wasn't as if Sasuke had come to him with anything, either. Their interactions weren't exactly strained, but…Naruto hadn't quite realized how much he filled the silence until he started not letting himself talk.
For the thousandth time, he glanced at Sasuke's door. Normally, he'd just invite himself in—barge in and force Sasuke to deal with his company—but now—somehow…
He looked away.
This really wasn't helping him focus. He had this stupid paper to write—and the worst part was, normally, when he was stuck like this, he would get Sasuke to help him.
It was just another thing that Sasuke did for him, asking for nothing in return…
He sagged, looking down at his hands.
Maybe he was just a bad friend.
For the thousandth time, Sasuke looked away from his door. He kept expecting it to burst open at any moment—Naruto barging in like the massive ball of energy that he was—
But it was just…silent.
He looked back down at his keyboard.
These past few weeks had been—odd. His interactions with Naruto had been almost…superficial. There were moments—brief ones—where it would almost feel like they were back to normal, and then Naruto's mouth would snap shut and his back would stiffen and he would look away from Sasuke—
And then it would just be silent. Again.
Sasuke had forgotten how much he hated this silence.
He kept wanting to talk to Naruto—to bring up his apology—but—
Each time, the only words Sasuke had found on his tongue were a confession. And he couldn't tell Naruto how he felt—he knew. What would be the point? The feelings would never be returned, and their relationship would become even more awkward (damaged) than it already felt—
No—he couldn't confess. He just needed to…wait until his brain provided him with something other than that to tell Naruto. To talk to Naruto. Fuck, he just wanted to be around Naruto.
With a sigh, he snapped his laptop shut, sliding it off his desk into his hand in the same motion.
Naruto was—predictably—on the couch, staring despondently as his own computer. He jerked up as Sasuke threw himself down beside him—
Sasuke said nothing, only opening his own computer. But he could see Naruto's smile widen—larger than he'd seen it in weeks—and he knew he understood.
Naruto dropped his things, frowning as he fished his phone out of his pocket. He had barely made it through the door before it started ringing—
He stared at the screen.
When Sakura had said she needed time—he had thought it would be a bit longer than a month—although, it was nearly two, now...
"Hello?" He bit his lip.
"Naruto," Sakura sounded breathless, "I don't—can I—I'm just—"
"Sakura, slow down," he stood, moving past Sasuke, "what's up?"
"Can I talk to you? In person?"
"Um," he shuffled in place, "sure—is the café okay?"
"Yeah—that's—that's great. I'm sorry—thank you—"
"Relax, it's okay," Naruto was already pulling on his jacket—Sakura really sounded frazzled, "I'll see you in ten."
He shook his head, hanging up.
"Sasuke—I'll be back in a bit, okay?"
He turned—Sasuke was facing away from him, as if about to go to his bedroom. He bit down on the urge to tell him how nervous he felt—how confused he was that Sakura had called—how he—he kind of wanted to ask Sasuke to come with him—
"Yes," Sasuke's voice was quiet—he turned, but Naruto still couldn't see his face, "I'll see you."
They were going to get back together.
Sasuke shut his eyes, hand clenching the back of the couch so hard it hurt—
Naruto and Sakura were going to get back together.
He had thought—for two brilliant months, he had started to think—
It was the same as it had always been.
He breathed out a shuddering, trembling breath, buckling forwards.
And he had been stupid enough to allow himself to hope—as if he could change anything—as if he could change this—
She looked about as shaken as she had sounded.
"Are you okay?" He threw her a small grin, trying not to let on just how unsettled he was feeling.
"Naruto," he saw her rock back on her heels, "I'm sorry—this is unfair—but I—there's no one else I can talk to—"
Her voice broke off and Naruto's eyes went wide.
"Hey," he moved closer, "what's going on?"
"I—um," she bit her lip, looking nervous, "I think—I think Ino has feelings for me."
"I overheard her—she was talking to someone—I don't know—but I think she—I think she—"
Sakura stopped, biting her lip again.
Naruto's mind reeled.
"Buh—okay," he sucked in a breath, "what time is it?"
"Okay, that's late enough," he moved by her, gesturing to the door with his head, "we're gonna go get a drink."
"But I—I don't know! Obviously she's great," Sakura scowled into her drink, "when she's not being a bitch—"
Naruto barked out a laugh, narrowly avoiding getting drink up his nose—
"Are you talking about Ino or Sasuke?"
"Hah!" Sakura threw her head back, laughing, "that's—that's too real—"
"He's been so weird recently," Naruto mumbled, taking another sip, "but I have been too, I guess." He rested his cheek on his fist, "I miss him."
"Hey," Sakura leaned over the table to point at him, "don't get all mopey drunk on me—I don't need mopey drunk Naruto right now—"
"Hang on—why do you miss him? You're around him all the fucking time—"
"Nooo," he waved his drink, pausing as some of it splashed onto his hand, "oops. No—I—y'know—I've been relying on him for like—for everything—!"
He waved the drink again and more splashed out—
"Put your drink down," Sakura made a motion that looked more like she was about to slap it out of his hand—Naruto dodged it by putting the drink down—
"He's like—he's so great, y'know? And I've been—been taking advantage of it. 'm a bad friend, Sakura."
He finished in a mumble, staring down into his drink.
"You're not a bad friend!"
"I am!" He glared at her, before blinking and shaking his head, "and I'm doing it again now—making this about myself 'stead of—"
"No—it helps," Sakura waved her drink in his direction, "I don't mind. I bet he doesn't mind. He likes you."
"I like him," Naruto scowled at his drink, "'m so scared of losing him."
"That's how I feel," Sakura plopped her empty glass onto the table, "about Ino."
She sighed—an exaggerated, long, dramatic sigh—
"Naru, how'm I getting home? I don't think I can face Ino like—like this," she gestured vaguely around herself—
"No? But you like her," Naruto squinted at her.
"Aren't you guys best friends? Like isn't she the person you're closest to out of everybody—"
"Would you wanna date Sasuke?"
Naruto reeled back in his chair.
"That's—that's not the same!"
"Aren't you guys best friends?" Sakura mocked, staring him down, "isn't he the person that you're closest to—"
"Oh come on," he slapped the table, "you know he would never like me like that—"
"Oh ho!" She yelled in victory, "so it's a question of him liking you!"
"No!" Naruto's eyes widened, "that's not—I mean—I didn't—"
His words lodged in his throat, something wickedly powerful spiraling through him—
Sakura leaned closer.
"If Sasuke asked you out, what would you say?"
He glared at her.
"If Ino asked you out, what would you say?"
"Sasuke!" Sasuke flinched at the voice that came echoing through the apartment—why was he was so loud— "I'm home!"
Naruto turned the corner, nearly running into him.
"Ah—whoa, hi," Naruto grinned up at him—eyes bright and sparkling and—
"…are you drunk?" He moved aside to let Naruto through; that proximity was—it was just—
"Yup!" Naruto grinned as if it was something to be proud of, stumbling on his way past Sasuke—Sasuke caught him by the arm—
"So what am I doing here? What's the plan?"
Naruto had brought Sakura back with him.
The pain—that familiar ice—filled up his chest, squeezing down on his lungs—
"You're waiting for Ino to pick you up," Naruto brandished his phone at her, "she's on her way—"
"Ino?!" Sakura's eyes bulged, "no—no, no, no, Naruto—I can't do that—I can't face her—I—"
"You can and you're gonna," Naruto crossed his arms, leaning against the wall.
"Sakura," Naruto stopped her, "you can't just avoid her."
Sakura's eyes narrowed.
"Oh—like you're one to talk—"
"Mister bad friend—"
"Oh fuck off, that's not the same—"
"How it it not?! You're—"
"Stop." Sasuke blood was reaching boiling point—this—this shit again, "both of you—cut it out."
They turned to look at him. He glared back—his eyes moving to focus on Naruto.
"For the record, this," he gestured at the two of them, "was exactly what I was talking about."
He spun on his heel.
It felt like a punch in the gut. Naruto collapsed back, against the wall, suddenly feeling as if standing up straight was the hardest thing in the world—
"Fuck, Naruto, I'm sorry," Sakura looked distraught, "I'll talk to him—"
"No," Naruto shook his head, eyeing the way the back door was lighting up, "don't bother. Ino's here."
There was a knock at the door.
"Hey," Naruto gave her a small, bland smile. He didn't have much more in him right now.
"Hey—wh—Sakura!" Ino ducked around Naruto, clearly worried, "is everything okay?"
Sakura's mouth opened and closed.
Naruto snorted, closing the door.
"You guys can use my room to talk."
Sakura's eyes—wide and scared—darted to him.
"It'll be fine, Sakura. Go."
Sasuke distinctly waited until he could hear the muffled voices on the other side of his wall—where Naruto's room was—before he decided it was safe to go back out. He had left his computer—and all of his work out there, in the living room—and—
Naruto was…on the couch. He had thought—that he'd be with Sakura, in his room. What—
"What are you doing here?"
Naruto's head slowly rose—lifting until Sasuke could see his red-rimmed eyes—a wave of guilt hit him like a truck—
"…did you want me to leave?" Naruto's voice was barely above whisper—it sounded broken; Sasuke's eyes went wide as the words hit him—
"I don't really have anyone else to stay with," Naruto let out a harsh breath, ducking his head away from Sasuke to wipe at his cheek—the motion was anything but subtle, "I guess I could call—Kiba—or something—"
Naruto started to stand—Sasuke lunged forwards to grab his wrist—
"No—don't be stupid, Naruto—I didn't mean that," he pulled his hand back, barely resisting the urge to move it closer instead, "you—I thought you were with Sakura—"
"Like—dating?" Naruto squinted up at him, eyebrows furrowed, "no—we broke up—y'know—the day you—uh—"
He laughed a little—a high, distorted sound—cutting himself off as he shuffled further away from Sasuke.
Something twisted in Sasuke's stomach.
"But I," he ran a hand through his hair, "figured it was on the list of stuff you didn't want to hear about anymore."
He swallowed—eyes determinedly staring at the wall.
"I've been trying to be really careful—but—um," he heaved a sigh, looking down at his feet, "sorry. I'm really drunk."
Sasuke blinked—once and then again—as the realization hit him.
"Naruto—that's—that's not," Sasuke desperately tried to put his thoughts in order, "Naruto—damn it, look at me—"
He reached out again, just as Naruto turned—fuck, this guilt was going to kill him—
"I didn't mean you couldn't talk to me," he scanned Naruto's eyes, "it was just the fighting—with Sakura. That's all it was—"
Naruto's head tilted a little, his eyebrows furrowed. Sasuke suddenly noticed the way he was leaning on the couch—as if it was the only thing keeping him upright—
"I'm—sorry," he bowed his head, swallowing. The way Naruto had been acting—the sudden silences—the strange distance between them—damn it, why did he always fuck everything up so royally—
"I'm sorry, Naruto," he breathed out again, and it was as if the pain fueled his voice, "please—"
A sharp inhale was Sasuke's only warning before he found himself with an armful of Naruto—squeezing him so hard that is very nearly hurt—
"m'sorry," he felt Naruto's words, pressed against his neck—
Sasuke blinked, hands hovering somewhere behind Naruto's back—
"Why are you—"
"I'm too drunk," Naruto muttered—weight falling further into him, "don't—you can't look so sad, Sasuke, I can't—"
He heaved in a shuddering breath, and it was if it sucked Sasuke's arms in, too—he clutched Naruto to him, swallowing against the lump in his throat—
"I've been a—shitty friend, s'ke—" he slurred the word, face twisting against Sasuke's skin—
"You—what?" What did that—how did Naruto even get that idea? "Did Sakura tell you that?"
Sakura's words—"mister bad friend"—rang through his head—he pulled back, holding Naruto by the shoulders, feeling the anger burst through him—
"Did Sakura tell you you were a bad friend?" He would kill her—as if Naruto was anything but brilliant—
"You—no—that," Naruto shook his head, looking confused, "no—she didn't. It was…"
He paused, heaving out a breath as he ran a hand through his hair—Sasuke kept his hands vaguely nearby as the blonde started to sway—
Those eyes turned back to him.
"Sasuke," they were so serious—so full of—pain…? "Why are you friends with me?"
Sasuke blinked—once, and then again.
Did he…even have a reason? Did he need a reason at all? Naruto was just—Naruto. From the moment they had met, he—
"I don't think you gave me much of a choice," he joked, trying to get Naruto to have an expression—any expression other than the one he had now—
But it didn't work.
Naruto's eyes went wide—Sasuke saw him rock back on his heels, as if debating moving away—
"That," Naruto said quietly, "exactly that."
"I never gave you a choice," Naruto said, taking a step back, "all I did—all I do is—talk—and talk and make you help me, make you—I can't even remember the last time you—the last time I did something for you—the last time you asked—but I do it every other fucking second—and—"
"—and—it's not even about this stuff with Sakura—it's everything, Sasuke—do you even like me or do I just force you—"
"—just force you to deal with me? You get nothing out of this and I've been—I've been—"
"Oh for fuck's sake," Sasuke hissed, grabbing Naruto by the shirt so he couldn't pull away as he clapped a hand over his mouth—
"Just—shut up," his heart thundered through his body—Naruto's voice swirled around him as if it was a sandstorm—
"I don't know if it's the alcohol—or Sakura—or what—but this is bullshit, Naruto," he didn't mean for his voice to raise, but the words were coming out of his mouth and he couldn't seem to stem the flow—
"It was a joke—you moron—you fucking—" his hand slipped off of Naruto's mouth to clutch at his shirt, instead, "you think I don't get anything out of this?"
As if—as if Naruto wasn't the reason he looked forward to coming home—as if Naruto hadn't single-handedly brought colour into Sasuke's dull, pathetic existence—as if Naruto wasn't the best fucking thing that had ever happened to him—
"You think I get nothing," he laughed—it sounded hysterical, "I get you."
He exhaled again, shaking his head as his eyes began to burn—
His hands clutched uselessly at Naruto's body—he tried to force himself to keep breathing—
He stared down at the ground, trying to get ahold of himself—trying to catch his thoughts before they spilled out of his mouth in a broken, frail whisper—
It was the soft touch of Naruto's hand on his chin that stopped his voice in its tracks—the way it gently lifted his face until Sasuke had no choice but to meet Naruto's eyes—but he only managed a glimpse of them—only a glimpse before—
Sasuke's mind screeched to a halt.
Naruto's lips pressed against his.
Sasuke teared himself away, eyes wide, from Naruto—
"You're drunk," he forced out, "you're—you don't—"
"It's not the alcohol," Naruto's eyes scanned his—he could see the worry, clear as day—and the fear—Sasuke sucked in a breath as Naruto bowed his head, looking down at his feet as if he had been—rejected—
"Sorry," it was that broken voice again—the one that shattered Sasuke's heart so easily, "that was—fuck, I'm sorry, Sasuke—I'll—"
"Naruto, no," he stepped closer—closer to Naruto—his hands nearly trembled with the desire to touch him—but he couldn't, he couldn't, "don't—don't jump to conclusions—"
Naruto's head jerked up—his eyes were so bright—his lips were so close—Sasuke's fingers brushed against the fabric of Naruto's shirt—
Sasuke's restraint crumbled.
Naruto's kiss had been soft—hesitant, as if it was barely there—and Sasuke's mind had been too far gone to appreciate it properly—but this—
This was perfection. This was eternity. Naruto's lips moved against his and it was if they were the edge of the galaxy—the stars themselves danced along Sasuke's lips, shooting sparks through him with each movement—each touch—Naruto's arms wrapped around him, pulling him closer, and it was all Sasuke wanted to be—closer, closer—he could drown in this—he could suffocate in this—Naruto was heaven and Sasuke felt as if he would happily die if it meant he could be here forever—
They pulled apart—nothing but trembling air between them. Sasuke felt as if something had shaken his very core—as if Naruto had reached in, and taken it as his own—
"Oh," Naruto's voice was quiet—his eyes bright, some mix between happiness and fear still swirling within them—
Sasuke let out a shuddering, trembling breath. He felt as if he would surely wake—at any moment, this would be a dream—
"You're drunk," he repeated.
"It's not the alcohol," Naruto responded in kind, but his voice was quiet, and his brow was furrowed—
"I don't believe you," he whispered. How could he? As if Naruto was within his grasp—after everything—after all these years—there were some things that were too good to be true and he knew this was one of them—
The silence dragged on as Naruto stared at him—eyes searching him for something—something Sasuke didn't know. But he waited. He couldn't speak—he couldn't bring himself to break this—to break this dream he was floating in—
"Okay," Naruto's hand reached down, intertwining their fingers, "come on."
Sasuke liked to think he could have disobeyed. He liked to think that he would have been able to keep his own free will, even with the way Naruto's touch sent sparks shooting up his arm, winding around his heart—around his mind—
Naruto pushed his bedroom door open.
Naruto shut the door behind them.
"We're not gonna do anything," Naruto's mouth spread into a smile—Sasuke had never quite seen that mix of mischievousness and affection on his face and he wasn't sure his heart would ever recover from the sight—
"Oh," he breathed out, unsure if he ought to feel relief or disappointment—
"Ino and Sakura are in my bedroom," he said, "so we're gonna stay here."
"And we're gonna go to sleep," Naruto's smile grew, "and I'm gonna kiss you first thing in the morning."
Sasuke's mouth opened and closed—his voice drifted somewhere out of his reach—
"And then you'll have no excuse not to believe me," Naruto sat down on the bed, but his hand didn't leave Sasuke's. It only pulled him closer—pulled him to stand in front of Naruto—Naruto smiled up at him and Sasuke thought he might die—
"You're straight," he whispered—some part of his mind was desperately trying to cling to reality—
Naruto laughed—Sasuke felt as if it lit a match, within him—
"I thought I was," he said, smiling, "guess not, though," he eyed Sasuke, eyes soft and warm, "'cause I really don't have an excuse for how bad I want to kiss you right now."
Sasuke drew in a shuddering breath.
"I've been drunk before, Sasuke," Naruto looked almost—amused, "s'not like it changes who I am."
Sasuke swallowed—his heart must have been swelling up, with the tightness he could feel in his chest—
"I feel way more sober now, anyway," Naruto pulled his feet up, crossing his legs—his other arm reached out so he could hold both of Sasuke's hands at once—
"So you—you like me, huh?" He asked quietly, that soft grin coming back in full force.
Sasuke resisted the urge to close his eyes—against the whirlwind of memories—emotions—that erupted in his head. Naruto said like and it made it sound so small—so simple—as if he hadn't been all but consumed—
"...Yes," it sounded like more of a breath than a word, but Naruto's hands squeezed his—
"Did you—know? Before today?"
So innocent—so ignorant, as Naruto always tended to be. So honest, too—slapping Sasuke with blatant, genuine emotion that he was left to do little more than blink in the face of it—
"Yes," he answered again.
"When did you…?"
Sasuke met his eyes, as if searching them would help him find his answer. His feelings for Naruto were never singular—never confined to a single instant. There was never a moment, stronger than all the others, that had explained everything to him all at once. It had been gradual—building inside of him so slowly, so insidiously—Naruto had taken hold of him piece by piece, until Sasuke had found himself without a heart and no idea when he had given it away—
It was the closest thing to an answer that Sasuke could give him. It was the closest he had come to having an answer himself. About midway through those years, Sasuke had finally put a label to the chaos inside him—but, by that point, he had sunk so far down into the hole these feelings dug him into that he could barely find the strength to breathe, let alone claw his way out—
"Fuck," Naruto breathed—Sasuke felt his grip tighten—he felt himself being drawn closer, "that's why you…"
He shook his head, ducking down.
"The fighting with Sakura," he gave a soft, unhappy laugh, gripping Sasuke tighter, "I can't believe you didn't yell at me sooner."
Sasuke would have swallowed the words if any had come to him, but his voice gave him nothing and his mind did the same—
"Damn it, Sasuke, you asshole," Naruto rocked forwards, shaking Sasuke with him, "why didn't you tell me—"
"I couldn't," he cut Naruto off, willing him to understand—the thought of telling Naruto—of losing Naruto—
"I know," Naruto shook his head, leaning back to look back up at him, "I wish you did, though."
Sasuke let out a small, trembling breath.
"I really wish you did." Naruto whispered, eyes searching his—
He was tempted—so tempted—to fall forwards, into Naruto's arms—his legs were growing weaker by the second, but he wasn't sure if he'd be able to stop himself if he gave in—
He ducked down, burying his face into Naruto's neck. Naruto's arms automatically wrapped around him—how easy it would be to push forwards, to crawl on top of Naruto, to—
"I really want to kiss you again," Naruto's breath brushed against his ear—Sasuke pulled back, eyes wide—
"Can I?" Naruto stared up at him—closer than before—Sasuke realized that he was kneeling, over Naruto's lap—he didn't know when he had done this—
"Just one more," Naruto's voice was growing breathier by the second, "just one, Sasuke—"
There was something he could hear in Naruto's voice—something he couldn't quite—
It was desire.
It was as if Sasuke's veins lit on fire at the thought—as if he had been brought back to life—Sasuke's restraint crumbled and so did his body—falling forwards, into Naruto's arms—Sasuke had fallen to his desire before but he had never had Naruto to catch him like this—
Naruto pulled Sasuke close and twisted—Sasuke didn't protest as his back hit the mattress—as Naruto crawled over him—he was too lost, too overwhelmed with the feeling of Naruto—the taste of Naruto—ah—Naruto—
Sasuke only got a second—one delicious, decadent second—of Naruto's hands reaching up, under his shirt—on his skin—before those hands were gone—the warmth was gone—Sasuke opened his eyes to see Naruto twisting off of him, throwing a hand over his eyes—
"I'm so fucking turned on," Naruto muttered, smiling softly. He peeked at Sasuke through his fingers, "like—I knew you were hot, but—fuck—"
He exhaled again, bringing up his other hand to his face.
"You knew I was…?"
Naruto groaned, pulling his hands away from his face.
"I knew you were attractive," he let out a puff of air, looking back at Sasuke, "obviously, I knew that. I just didn't realize how attracted I was to you."
Sasuke stared at him. Naruto's lips twitched to the side.
"…That sounds really dumb when I say it out loud," he laughed, "fuck, I'm so dumb."
"…I've never denied that," Sasuke whispered. It came out weaker than he intended—but Sasuke always tended to feel weaker with Naruto's eyes on him—
"Yeah, you bastard," Naruto smiled widened as he reached out, towards Sasuke—it took no effort at all for Sasuke to catch his hand with his own.
There was a pause—a moment where Sasuke let his mind settle—let his thoughts calm—let himself really, truly get lost in Naruto's eyes, as he had so desperately wanted to before…
But Naruto's blinks were starting to slow—lids falling lower and lower—staying shut longer and longer—he could see the way Naruto jerked himself awake, as if trying to stop himself, but—
"You're falling asleep, aren't you?"
"Yeah," Naruto smiled, "you mind?"
"I don't mind," he said softly—Naruto's fingers traced a path along his palm, "you should get under the covers."
"I should." Naruto agreed, "you gonna get under with me?"
Sasuke swallowed, shuffling back a little—the peace he had felt a moment ago falling back in the face of a new wave of nerves—
"I should…brush my teeth—and—get water—"
"Sasuke," Naruto said gently, "I'm not gonna freak out if I wake up next to you."
Sasuke didn't reply—his mind was far too busy dancing on the edge of being desperate to believe Naruto's words and being far too afraid to even consider them—
"I'd really like it, actually," Naruto gave a sleepy giggle, "it'd make all the kissing I wanna do way more convenient—"
"You're an idiot," Sasuke's response was automatic—it was effortless—somehow, he wasn't sure the blonde even knew he was doing it, but Naruto just—just settled his nerves so easily—
"Mm, yeah," Naruto pulled their hands up—the back of Sasuke's hand pressed against his cheek, "but—y'know—I can't promise that I won't do something dumb by accident or anything, but—"
Naruto's eyes opened, suddenly looking far more awake.
"You know I'd never want to lose you, right?"
Sasuke sucked in a breath.
"So don't worry about me freaking out or anything," those eyes bore holes into his soul—into his mind—Sasuke was nothing when he was under their gaze, "you're way too important for me to screw this up."
"I might screw it up," if Naruto hadn't been so close—if he hadn't been able to feel Sasuke's breath on his face, Sasuke was sure he wouldn't have heard—
"As if I'd let you do that," Naruto's eyes glittered with challenge—with such intensity, "asshole."
Sasuke gave a soft snort—it ended up coming out as more of a breath—
"It's gonna be okay. I'm gonna prove it to you—tomorrow—and every day after that—okay?"
And every day after that.
The tightness in Sasuke's chest unfurled—slowly, softly—under the weight of Naruto's words.
Naruto's first thought, when he awoke, was that he had never been thirstier in his life. His second thought was that Sasuke really ought to invest in some curtains, because the sun was—
Naruto's eyes sprang open.
There, not two inches in front of him, was Sasuke—sleeping as peacefully as could be. Naruto sucked in a soft, shaky breath as the memories from last night flooded his brain.
He couldn't believe he had actually had the fucking guts to kiss Sasuke. He couldn't believe that Sasuke had actually fucking kissed him back—holy—he hadn't—
How had he not figured this out sooner? How had he gone on—knowing how important Sasuke was to him, knowing how—how attractive he found Sasuke—hell, the amount of times he had joked about Sasuke looking like a pretty girl—
He slapped his hands over his face.
He was so damn dumb. He was never gonna live this down. He was sure Sasuke would tease the hell out of him once he felt comfortable enough—honestly, Kiba, alone, was gonna absolutely ruin him with this—
He pulled his hands away, turning to look at Sasuke. Sasuke's hair got kinda wavy when it was messy—it curled against the pillow, against his cheek…Naruto bit his lip. It wasn't the first time he had felt this weird feeling in his chest when it came to Sasuke—this adrenalized, giddy, nervous feeling—
But it was the first time he understood it. Properly.
He found Sasuke attractive. Hell, he found him beautiful—and Sasuke had been his best friend—the most important person in his life—for ages, now…and—and—if only he had known sooner—
Naruto let out a breath.
Okay—this was—this was a lot to process. Too much—in his dehydrated, hungover state…although, this was definitely not one of his worse mornings. He only had the makings of a headache, but he probably needed to take some painkillers before it developed into a full-blown migraine—
He slid out of the bed, sneaking out the door. He'd just grab some water—maybe some painkillers—and be back in a flash.
The bed felt cold.
It wasn't a new feeling—not to Sasuke, who spent the majority of his life feeling far colder than he had any business being—but there was something…different about it, today.
He rolled over, letting out a breath—this side of the bed was much warmer, from where Naruto had lain—
Sasuke's eyes flew open.
His fingers curled, slowly, against the fabric of the empty sheets—clawing into them—
Naruto wasn't here.
Naruto wasn't here.
He closed his eyes—so tight, it was nearly painful—as he curled up, pulling the sheets against his chest, as if they would do something about the pain—
He had ruined this.
He had taken—he had known Naruto was drunk and vulnerable and—and—and he had ruined this—
He buried his face into his sheets, and slowly fell apart.
Naruto let out a breath, filling a cup at random. The door to his bedroom was open, now, he noticed. He vaguely wondered if Sakura and Ino had worked things out—
Probably, considering neither of them were here anymore.
And no one had interrupted him and Sasuke last night, either.
He stifled the smile as he downed a couple painkillers, refilling the glass of water. It was kind of scary—really—how much he liked Sasuke. Now that he was actually noticing it, anyway. He had definitely felt like this before—he just hadn't...paid attention, or understood, or something, Naruto didn't know—but this...didn't feel new.
He had no idea how old it was, though.
It wasn't as if their friendship was new—and wasn't as if it had been instant, either. It had taken them years to build up to the level of trust they had now. To this level of…comfort. Naruto hadn't even really noticed how much he had come to rely on Sasuke until they had been graduating together—until…Sasuke had gotten his acceptance first, and Naruto had never checked his email so many times in one day, because—
The thought of going somewhere, away from Sasuke…the thought of Sasuke going away from him—it had been completely unacceptable. The very thought had flooded his body with fear. And then they had graduated again and the same fear had taken hold of him—
His friendship with Sasuke was like...home. It was where he came back to—no matter what else was going on in his life, Sasuke was permanent. It's why he had felt so awful—so shaken—at the thought that he was taking it for granted. That he was taking Sasuke for granted—that he could be losing Sasuke.
Naruto let out a long breath.
Sasuke, his best friend. His very attractive best friend—who everyone else obviously found just as attractive because really, who wouldn't be attracted that pretty boy?
He snorted a little, shaking his head at his own thoughts.
If that had been the case—and he had been convinced that it was—then kissing Sasuke wouldn't have felt so…right. Holding his hand, pressing against his body—he had always gotten a thrill out of how Sasuke let him touch him in a way he didn't let anyone else—shouldn't have felt like...like it was something he had been waiting for.
The natural next step.
He bit his lip, eyes flickering to the door. He remembered telling Sasuke that he'd kiss him—pretty much the first thing in the morning—and he definitely intended to make good on that promise, but—he didn't brush his teeth last night, so by now, his breath…
He snuck over to the bathroom. He didn't have to do a good job; just minty enough so he wouldn't taste bad for his first kiss with Sasuke—well, first sober kiss. His first kiss had been…
'You think I get nothing. I get you.'
He spat out some toothpaste in the place of a breath. The way he had felt when Sasuke had said that—he had already been emotional enough because of everything else going on—but that—
He threw his toothbrush back in the cupboard, grabbing his cup of water as he passed the kitchen—he didn't really know what he was feeling right now but what he did know is that he really wanted to kiss Sasuke again—
He swallowed as he reached the doorway—there was no need to be this nervous, honestly, it wasn't like Sasuke would be awake yet—he nudged the door open a bit more, wincing as it creaked—
He only caught a flash of Sasuke, curled up, clutching the covers to him before the Uchiha spun around, eyes wide—red-rimmed—
"Are you okay?" Naruto immediately dropped to his knees, beside the bed—shoving the cup somewhere on the table beside them—
Sasuke stared at him.
"Hey," he breathed out, "what's wrong?"
God he hoped—he really hoped Sasuke didn't—didn't regret—
The words were so quiet, he could barely hear Sasuke's voice in them at all—for a moment, they didn't even register—and then—
"Sasuke, you idiot," he pulled himself up onto the bed—kneeling beside Sasuke to clutch him to him—he felt so stiff, "I didn't mean—I was just getting some water—you—I thought you'd still be asleep—"
He let out a breath, pulling him in closer. He could feel the way Sasuke's breath shuddered against his neck—fuck, Sasuke had really thought—
"You still don't believe me, do you?"
Sasuke didn't reply. Naruto pulled back, shuffling closer to Sasuke so he could actually sit down.
"Okay," Naruto let out a puff of air, "you know why Sakura called yesterday? Why I went out to meet her?"
Sasuke's eyes slowly rose to meet his. He shook his head.
Naruto bit his lip.
"'Cause she found out Ino had feelings for her," he snorted, shaking his head a little, "she overheard something—and freaked out, I guess. She wanted someone to talk to—so she called me."
He threw Sasuke a smile, shifting a little so that the back of his hand pressed against Sasuke's arm—
"And it didn't really make sense to me—why they wouldn't date. I told her that," he looked down at their hands—Sasuke's fingers had stretched ever so slightly towards Naruto, as if wanting to reciprocate the touch, "when we were drunk—I mean. You know how it makes me say whatever the hell I want."
He laughed again, nudging Sasuke.
"You don't need alcohol for that," Sasuke muttered quietly—Naruto felt the thrill of victory run through him at the barest hint of a smile he could see on that face—
"Bastard," he flicked Sasuke's arm, "anyway—I told Sakura that—y'know—she and Ino were best friends," he looked back down at his lap, "and it just—if the person you trusted the most—the person who you already cared about—like, that much—y'know—that person—"
He swallowed, eyes flickering up to Sasuke's for barely a moment—
"Why wouldn't you date them?" Naruto's lifted his head, "why wouldn't you try? It didn't make sense. It doesn't make sense. I—"
"I'm a man, Naruto," Sasuke interrupted him—eyes fierce, shining with some sort of intensity—
"I know that," Naruto shuffled in place, "obviously—Sasuke—I know that—c'mon. Don't be an ass. It doesn't change how I feel."
He paused, giving Sasuke a chance to reply—but the Uchiha stayed silent.
"And anyway," Naruto straightened himself up again, "you're interrupting. I said that to Sakura—and then she said—she—she basically called me out on it."
He gave a breathy laugh, running a hand through his hair.
"She said—that—that was all true about me and you. And I—I tried to deny it, but when she asked me if I'd date you—"
He looked back at Sasuke—the nerves back in full force, now—
"I told her I couldn't. Not that I wouldn't," the nerves bubbled up in the shape of a laugh, "that I couldn't—'cause there was no way you'd ever be interested."
In the drunken, dizzy state he had been in, everything had seemed to just…make sense. Like a switch had flipped in his head—it was just so clear, to him, that in a world where Sasuke was interested, he would absolutely say yes.
It just hadn't been this world.
He met Sasuke's eyes, which had grown much wider, now—
"You—um," he swallowed, looking away, "you do—I mean—you are still interested, right?"
The nerves made it way too hard to hold Sasuke's gaze, but he could do it for bits at a time—just to catch a glimpse, because Sasuke was still silent and Naruto's heart was gonna pound right out of his chest any second now—
It was barely a breath, but Naruto jerked his head up at the sound—just in time to catch Sasuke leaning forwards, and—oh—oh—
It was almost as if he melted.
He had never felt Sasuke move so gently—he had never expected his lips to feel so soft—the tension, and the nerves, and everything else just seemed to seep from him—dripping from his grasp as if it was liquid—
And then Sasuke's mouth opened, and it was as if Naruto was fif-fucking-teen, because that was a signal and he heard himself moan—moan—into Sasuke's mouth as he pushed forwards—Sasuke's arms wrapped around him—catching him, pulling him in—and Naruto felt his world shift—he didn't even notice the way his lungs protested until Sasuke pulled away—Naruto immediately wanted to cry out why—
"Did you—brush your teeth?"
It took a moment for the words to register (with Naruto's mind steeped in the fog that it was) but he immediately felt his face flush as they did. He wasn't even sure why he was so embarrassed—but he knew Sasuke could tell and that made it even worse—
"Uh—yeah," he rubbed the back of his neck, face burning, "I wanted—y'know—if I was—I just…didn't want to—um—taste…bad?"
He flickered his gaze up to meet Sasuke's—who looked—
"Don't laugh at me!"
"I'm not," Sasuke protested—but Naruto could see his smirk widening and Naruto knew the asshole well enough to know that damn look—he shoved at his shoulder, surprised when Sasuke fell back against the pillows—he really hadn't pushed him that—
Sasuke reached up and grabbed the collar of Naruto's shirt.
Naruto sucked in a breath, eyes wide, as Sasuke gently pulled him forwards—he moved as if Sasuke's hand was a magnet—as if he was drawn to even the barest touch (or maybe it was the way his eyes were glittering, or the half-smile he still had on his face)—
He didn't even notice himself leaning down until it was too late—too late—Naruto sighed against Sasuke's lips as they moved against his—as Sasuke reached up, one hand sliding up his neck, into his hair—Sasuke pulled him closer and Naruto obeyed—pushing closer, pushing his tongue forward—Sasuke made a noise—as if of need—it went straight to Naruto's crotch—
A thrill of pleasure ran through him and he pulled back, realizing he had dropped his hips to grind against Sasuke's—even through the blankets—but Sasuke, looking up at him through half-lidded eyes, hands dropping to casually rest over his head, lips still swollen and panting—
Sasuke…didn't seem to mind…
The thought took hold of his body—he bit his lip, staring down at Sasuke—he met his gaze, intently, as he pressed himself against Sasuke again—
Sasuke threw his head back, hips bucking up against Naruto—he could feel the way his body was reacting—he could—
He dove down, pressing his lips to Sasuke's neck—the skin he had exposed when he had arched, like that—he had never seen Sasuke like that—he had never seen Sasuke like this—his hands moved down to grab at Sasuke, to press them together—
Sasuke's breath came in small gasps—it came in time with the way they moved—because Sasuke—Sasuke was moving with him—Naruto shuddered closer to him, biting down on a moan—biting down on Sasuke's neck—
Sasuke's arms wrapped around him, nudging his head—their lips met so easily—so naturally—fuck—of course (of course) Sasuke was a good kisser—Sasuke was good at everything—Sasuke was—
"Sasuke," he mumbled against his lips—it came out as more of a sigh—but he knew Sasuke heard from the way his arms wrapped around him, tighter—from the way his hips arched up—from the way he started kissing harder, fiercer—god, he couldn't believe this—he couldn't believe Sasuke wanted him like this—that Sasuke—
"Wait," Naruto pulled back, stopping moving completely—Sasuke made some sort of half-strangled noise—
"Did I ask you out yet?"
"Wh-what?" Sasuke's voice was breathless—he stared at Naruto as if he were insane—
"Did I ask you out—are we dating? I didn't ask, did I? Shit—"
Sasuke blinked up at him—
"D'you wanna go out with me?"
There was a moment where Sasuke just stared—looking up at him with such a blank expression that Naruto wasn't sure he'd heard him at all—and then—
He burst into laughter.
"You—" he laughed, throwing his hands up over his face, "you—moron—"
Naruto couldn't even find it in himself to be offended—Sasuke laughed again and Naruto's heart skipped another beat—
Sasuke was laughing at him—he knew that—but much more than that—
—Sasuke seemed so…happy.
"C'mon, asshole—that's not an answer," Sasuke's laugh was so contagious—Naruto pulled at his hands just to get a glimpse of it—Sasuke's eyes opened, looking up at him, and Naruto felt something warm and wonderful rush through his body—
"I haven't given you enough of an answer already?"
There was something in his eyes—something in that smirk—some sort of intensity that made Naruto feel—that made him feel—
"I," his mouth felt dry—he let his tongue dart out to wet his lips, "could use more…"
He felt Sasuke's hand wrap around the back of his neck—it didn't pull, not yet, but Naruto felt himself being drawn closer all the same—
It was different, this time, as their lips met. Sasuke kissed him with purpose—with a confidence that hadn't been there before. It made it feel—god—it made Naruto feel so—
He pulled back, ripping the covers out from in between them (it was already bad enough that their clothes were in the way)—Sasuke only helped him, kicking at the covers until they were off the bed entirely—
He settled in between Sasuke's legs, letting his hands run along them—up his shins, slowly, past his knees—to his thighs—Naruto let out a slow, shuddering breath, as if it would somehow release some of what he was feeling—
"What?" Sasuke was watching him—face flushed. Naruto felt a smile spread across his face—Sasuke was blushing—
"What, I'm not allowed to look?" He moved forwards, stopping to squeeze Sasuke's hips, running his hands along his chest—he had never felt Sasuke's body, like this—he had never allowed himself to really admire him, properly—but he could, now, he could—
"Sasuke," he swallowed, running his fingers along the hem of Sasuke's shirt, "can I…?"
From the way Sasuke immediately sat up, throwing his shirt to the floor—that was a resounding yes.
It wasn't as if it was the first time he'd seen Sasuke shirtless—hell, it wasn't the first time he'd touched him, either—but, somehow—
Naruto's fingers traced a path down Sasuke's chest, pausing to squeeze his waist…somehow—this felt different. This felt…intimate. This felt…almost—
Touching Sasuke was turning him on.
He let out another shuddering breath, leaning closer—letting his eyes drift up to Sasuke's—who was watching him, with a nearly unwavering gaze, as his breath danced across Sasuke's chest. He pressed a kiss to his skin—and then another—and then another—and with each kiss he felt a thrill run through him, until his entire being felt as if it was humming with pleasure—
"Sasuke…" he kissed the name against his skin, "—s'ke—"
He traced kisses up to Sasuke's nipple—his collarbone—his neck—he nipped at his ear just as his hips sank down, resting against Sasuke's—pressing against Sasuke's—
He grinned against Sasuke's skin as they began to move—because it was Sasuke who had lifted his hips up, to meet Naruto's—Sasuke, who started to move, pulling Naruto to move with him—Sasuke, whose breaths were growing harsher with every passing second—
"Naruto—if you keep—" Sasuke's voice was strained—breathless—Naruto pulled back just enough to see his face—
"Me too," was all he got out before their lips were together once again—before Sasuke's arms wrapped around him, nails digging into his back, his hair—before he felt the pleasure curling, twisting inside of him, building—building—building—
Sasuke's body tensed—the kiss broke as he threw his head back—
"Oh, god, Naruto—!"
For a moment—Naruto saw white. The pleasure echoed with Sasuke's name, pulsing through his body like a mantra—Sasuke, Sasuke, Sasuke—
"Hah," his elbows buckled and he collapsed, panting against Sasuke. This was—that had been—
"Holy crap, Sasuke," that exhilarated feeling—it was only growing. He could feel it bubbling up, in his chest—and he just—he just couldn't help it—
He just felt so good—and this was so—so unbelievable. He had just—fucking—dry humped Sasuke until they both came. Sasuke had fucking cum, and—damn it all—Naruto had been so focused on his own orgasm that he hadn't even seen the face Sasuke had made—
"Have you finally lost it?"
Naruto laughed again, pushing himself up until he hovered just a little off of Sasuke's body—
"I haven't—" god, he didn't even know where to start, "I haven't cum in my pants since I was in high school—"
He crumbled against Sasuke as he broke out into another fit of laughter—it took all the effort in the world to get him under control—
"Sasuke," he grinned down at him—Sasuke's face was bright red, now, "go out with me."
"No, I mean, like—right now," he sat up further—realizing he was still between Sasuke's legs, "let's get breakfast—or, uh, lunch—I don't know what time it is. Like a date."
Sasuke blinked at him again.
"I mean—not like a date. A date. A real date."
"I," Sasuke swallowed, "need a—shower."
"Oh—yeah," Naruto laughed, shuffling back, "me too. I mean—like—in a bit. Okay?"
Sasuke's face was still just as red as he sat up, nodding softly.
Even the cold, cold shower wasn't managing to screw Sasuke's head back on straight.
This whole morning—hell, last night, too—had just been completely surreal. Sasuke felt like he was…like this was a dream. It had to be—it had to—and yet…
He knew it wasn't, because there was no way that orgasm wouldn't have woken him up. He could still feel it—he still felt shaken, weak—trapped in some sort of haze—or maybe he just hadn't recovered from the first time Naruto had kissed him—
He put a hand to the tile, trying to stabilize himself.
Because Naruto had kissed him. Naruto had touched him and wanted to touch him—Sasuke had never seen desire, like that, in someone's eyes (but these were Naruto's eyes and they were capable of things that no regular person's were)—
And then Naruto had asked to date him—as if he was excited, as if he couldn't wait—and the joy, in his laugh, when he had—
"Fuck," he breathed, his entire body leaning against the tile, now. He felt so overwhelmed with emotion—so—raw—he wondered if he would even be able to make it through a date without blurting out "I love you" in his current state—
He wondered how Naruto would take that.
It was already a miracle the blonde had taken everything else as well as he had, but when Naruto had ripped the covers from in between them—when his hands had traced along Sasuke's body—Sasuke had felt as if he was a hair's breadth from tearing Naruto's clothes off, too—
And if he had done that—well.
Sasuke's restraint could only go so far—and he had been pushing its limits for years. It was a miracle it hadn't broken sooner. And having Naruto so close—having everything he ever wanted at his fingertips—was fraying it at an alarming rate.
He let out another breath, tilting his head so the spray was on his face. He wouldn't push—he couldn't. He could barely bring himself to speak—nearly paralyzed by the fear that he would say something to break this, to wake up from this dream, to make Naruto change his mind—
Naruto looked up as Sasuke exited the bathroom, still rubbing his hair with a towel. He felt almost like he—wanted to stand, to run up to Sasuke, or something—but he settled for just shuffling along the couch to sit on the armrest. Sasuke had let him shower first, but as soon as he had finished getting changed—
"I was thinking about joining you, y'know," the words blurted out of his mouth.
Sasuke blinked up at him, moving the towel away from his ear.
"In the shower, I mean," he felt so full of energy—like he just couldn't sit still, "you didn't lock the door."
Sasuke always locked the door—and Naruto had sat on the couch, warring with himself for the better part of the ten minutes Sasuke had been in the bathroom, wondering if it was just wishful thinking or if Sasuke had wanted him to—if he had been asking Naruto to—join him—
Probably not, considering the way Sasuke was staring at him right now.
Naruto viciously stamped down on his disappointment—he gave a nervous laugh, opening his mouth to give some sort of excuse—
"You shouldn't joke about things like that," Sasuke's voice was soft, but his eyes shone with a fire so intense that Naruto felt as if it bore a hole right through him, "I might think you're being serious."
Sasuke made to move past him, looking away—but Naruto grabbed his wrist on the way by, getting to his feet—
"I—wasn't really joking, Sasuke," he said, nerves coming back to life under his skin—Sasuke was tense, awfully so, and he still didn't look back at Naruto, but—surely—Sasuke realized, by now, that Naruto was attracted to him, and Naruto had asked him out, so really—this wasn't out of the blue or anything—
"…you don't know what you're saying."
Naruto scowled. This again—
"Yes I do, Sasuke, you asshole," he stood, pulling Sasuke towards him, just as the Uchiha spun around—Naruto felt his back hit the armrest as Sasuke pressed against him—
"Naruto—" Sasuke's voice was low—Naruto felt himself shudder, "you need to make your boundaries very, very clear to me."
Naruto desperately tried to gather his thoughts—but Sasuke was so close to him, he could feel his breath against his lips—
"Do you understand?"
Naruto swallowed—his throat felt so dry—
"Well—I—" fuck, come on, brain, work, "y'know—I need to know your boundaries, too—"
"I have none."
"Wh—" Naruto stared at him, letting out a nervous laugh, "no—Sasuke, you obviously do—"
"What—like—you'd have sex with me right now? C'mon…" He laughed a little—but Sasuke's eyes only turned darker.
"Is that what you want?"
Naruto stared at him.
"Oh," Naruto breathed, "you're not kidding."
Sasuke gave a long exhale—Naruto could feel the frustration in it, just from the sound—
"You…" he shook his head, giving Naruto a wane smile as he stepped away, "are so clueless."
Sasuke pressed his back against the wall, heaving out a breath. He was furious with himself. He had just—just—finished telling himself that he would do nothing to remotely scare Naruto away and then he went and did that—
He just—fuck—he just couldn't control himself around Naruto. He never could—but this—Sasuke's brain was taking even the slightest hints of interest and latching onto them—amplifying them—he couldn't let himself lose it like this—
The door opened.
Sasuke, not for the first time, cursed Naruto's complete inability to knock—
"You," Naruto cut him off, poking him in the chest, "are an asshole."
Sasuke's mouth clamped shut.
"But—yeah, you're right," he laughed a little, "I feel pretty clueless. I don't really know what I'm doing. I don't really know what to tell you—for, um, boundaries, y'know—'cause I—um," his hands moved slowly, hovering on either side of Sasuke, "I keep expecting to feel uncomfortable or something, and I'm just…not."
Those hands gripped his waist, softly, and Sasuke felt his breath leave him—
"I—um—it's weird," he laughed a little, "I don't know if you feel it, too—but doesn't it," he stepped a little closer, his arms moving to wrap further around Sasuke, "doesn't it feel kinda…right?"
It was the understatement of the century, in Sasuke's opinion, but he found himself nodding along all the same—
"Okay," Naruto breathed out—as if relieved—as if he had expected any other answer, "okay—good," he gave another short, breathy laugh, "so—if you want something, then, just—just ask me. Just tell me—and I'll tell you how I feel about it."
He smiled at Sasuke, then—with expression so earnest and open that Sasuke thought he might die just from the sight of it—his heart squeezed so tight—
"But for the record," Naruto's grin turned mischievous, "I'm not putting out until we at least have one date. Or—three dates, that's the rule—right?"
Sasuke let out a breath—it nearly sounded like a laugh—and he felt the tension leave his body with it—
"So, uh, one out of three," Naruto winked at him and Sasuke's heart blinked out of existence, "you ready to go?"
"Kay," Naruto's grin widened, and he stepped back, his hand falling to catch Sasuke's as he did, "c'mon—I've got a plan."
"Yeah. Let's take my car."
Naruto bit his lip—eyes darting to the passenger seat for what felt like the millionth time. He felt so—nervous—again—it was like every time they were silent for more than five seconds, Naruto's body just went fucking crazy—
He let out another long, slow breath, trying to calm himself down. He felt like someone had stuffed him full of bees or something.
"Are you nervous?"
Naruto blinked and glanced over to see Sasuke watching him. Well—the jig was up, he guessed.
"Yeah," he laughed a little, "like—good nervous, though. Excited. I feel like I've…had way too much caffeine or something."
He tapped his fingers on the steering wheel, as if accentuating his point. It helped to expel some of the buzzing under his skin—but it wasn't nearly enough. He still felt full—to the brim—with this nervous, giddy energy and he had no idea what to do with it all—
He glanced over at Sasuke.
Well, he could think of some things…
"What are you thinking about?"
Naruto's face flushed a bright red.
"Uh—nothing in particular," he lied, turning his eyes back to the road—the road, Naruto—
"Hm," Sasuke made a noise—and just from the sound of it, Naruto knew he didn't believe him. He hadn't really expected him to, anyways—Naruto was a terrible liar at the best of times.
He let out another breath as they slowed in front of a red light.
Sasuke…wasn't exactly a physically affectionate person, but Naruto definitely was—and Sasuke knew that full well—and he had never seemed to mind Naruto touching him, especially now…
Naruto reached out, gently placing a hand on Sasuke's.
There was a long, quiet moment—it felt like hours to Naruto—where Sasuke didn't respond. And then—slowly—Sasuke's fingers threaded with his.
Naruto—really—did his best to stifle the smile. He really tried.
He didn't do a very good job.
Some part of him had, honestly, expected Naruto to bring them to Ichiraku's. It was Naruto's home away from home, after all—and whenever Sasuke didn't specify what he wanted, it's what he ended up getting.
Instead, they were somewhere…considerably more expensive.
"Hi—Naruto Uzumaki," Naruto leaned on the counter a little, giving the host a bright smile, "I called a little while ago—"
"Yes—I see you here. Just one second, Mr. Uzumaki."
The host turned and so did Naruto—and just like that, Sasuke's heart was working overtime again.
"Fancy," he muttered, mostly to say something—
Naruto's face flushed.
"Well—you liked it the last time we were here, so…" Naruto gave a small shrug.
Sasuke raised an eyebrow. The last time they were here…it had been for someone's birthday. Maybe Chouji's? Sasuke couldn't quite remember…
"That was some time ago," he eyed Naruto. Now that he thought about it—Naruto's hair was looking particularly tame, and hadn't he bought Naruto the shirt he was wearing, too?
Naruto's face grew even redder.
"Um, yeah—well," he shuffled in place, looking off to the side, "you're such a priss that when something actually meets your standards, it's definitely gonna stick out in my memory—"
Sasuke whacked the side of his head, and Naruto dissolved into laughter.
"Oi, don't you—"
"Naruto? Hey, Naruto!"
Naruto blinked, turning around at the noise—was that—
"I knew that was your laugh, hey man!" Kiba threw an arm around him, clapping him on the back, "c'mon—we're right here—"
Kiba pulled him around the corner, and true to his word—there they were.
Sasuke watched—with a sinking feeling carving a hole through his stomach—as Naruto was pulled forwards—into hugs, into conversation, nearly into a chair—
So much for their "date".
He gave a small sigh as it was Sakura's turn to give Naruto a hug. He knew—he knew he shouldn't feel this…disappointed, but—
"I thought you said you couldn't make it?"
"Yeah, I can't," Naruto shook his head, pulling away from them, "me and Sasuke gotta go in a sec."
Sasuke blinked in surprise.
"We can eat with them," he offered. Really—it would be kind of awkward to know everyone was a few tables away, and Naruto would obviously want—
"Nah, we can't," Naruto shuffled back over to him, grinning, "I told you—I have plans."
"Laaame," Kiba interrupted, yelling over everyone else—as usual, "can't you stay long enough for Ino and Sakura's big announcement or whatever? They're the ones who made us all come here."
"I'm pretty sure I already know what it is," Naruto threw Sakura a grin—who was sitting beside Ino. Awfully close to her.
Maybe Naruto had been right.
"You're not here to steal our thunder?" Sakura raised an eyebrow, her eyes flickering between him and Sasuke—and Sasuke suddenly felt as if he wasn't getting nearly enough air, because—
'I tried to deny it, but when she asked me if I'd date you—'
'I told her I couldn't. Not that I wouldn't—that I couldn't—'cause there was no way you'd ever be interested.'
And she believed that Naruto felt the same.
"Mr. Uzumaki—your food is ready."
"Ah—yeah! Hang on a sec, guys," Naruto trotted over to the counter, throwing Sasuke a grin on the way. Sasuke turned to follow—
"Actually—Sasuke, could I talk to you for a second?"
He let out a low breath to steady himself, watching Naruto's retreating back. He knew he had no right to feel as hostile towards the pink-haired girl as he did—especially now. And upsetting her would only serve to upset Naruto, later—and, really, if she had talked to Naruto, and helped him come to the conclusion that dating Sasuke was a reasonable option—
Sakura looked surprised, but she smiled as she stood, gesturing for him to follow.
"I wanted to—ah—" her eyes flickered back to Naruto, "apologize. For all the mess Naruto and I put you through. I know you don't really like me—and most of it's for good reason, I know, but I just wanted to make sure you—you know—you know how much you mean to him, right?"
It was on the tip of his tongue to tell her they were dating—that they had worked it out—that she didn't need to do this—but—
He wanted to hear it.
"You're the most important person in his life, I think," Sakura glanced over his shoulder again, as if making sure Naruto wasn't listening, "it was something we'd fight about. A lot, actually," she laughed a little, "I always felt as if I was second to you."
Sasuke struggled somewhere between desperately needing to breathe and desperately needing to hold his breath still—something in his chest twisted and tightened and twisted again—
"I just—I just I wanted to make sure you knew. So that there weren't any misunderstandings—anymore."
Sasuke opened his mouth—he wasn't sure what was going to come out, but he felt the need to say something—
"I got the food!" Naruto grinned, sidling right up to Sasuke—he leaned just close enough to whisper in Sasuke's ear—
"Can I tell them?"
For a moment, Sasuke's mind was far too occupied feeling Naruto's breath on his skin to consider any of his words—
"Oh, I fucking knew it."
He blinked as Naruto pulled away—that had been—
"Shh, Sakura!" Naruto waved his hands in front of her, "don't—hang on—" he spun back to Sasuke, eyes bright and excited and—
Sasuke gave a quick nod—and then another, just to make sure Naruto saw—
"I knew it," Sakura poked her finger right into Naruto's chest, "you're totally here to steal our thunder."
"It's not my fault you guys picked this place! We're not even staying, we're leaving right now—"
Naruto grabbed Sasuke's hand, pulling him towards the entrance—
"Bye guys! I'll hang out with you later," Naruto waved the bags in the table's direction, and Sasuke could practically feel the eyes staring at the grip Naruto had on him, "Sasuke and I are on a date!"
And then they were out the door, Naruto nearly cackling with laughter as he pulled them to the car.
"My phone's gonna explode, but that was totally worth it," he grinned, turning to face Sasuke fully for a moment, "you really don't mind?"
"I don't mind," he said softly—why couldn't imagine why he would; those words sounded so good in Naruto's voice, "why would I?"
"I dunno," Naruto shrugged a little, his grin softening, "I never even knew that you liked guys in the first place, so I wasn't sure—y'know—"
"If I had told you that, then I would have told you everything," Sasuke let his eyes close as his forehead rested against Naruto's.
"I wish you had."
Sasuke let out a breath.
"…You've said that already."
"Yeah," Naruto laughed a little, "and I'm gonna keep saying it. I also wish I wasn't such a fucking idiot."
That made Sasuke laugh, shifting back just enough to softly shake his head—but it was only a moment before Naruto closed the gap between them.
On any other day, Sasuke, with a stomach devoid of both food and coffee, would be an absolute nightmare. He had been informed so by Naruto—by his brother—pretty much everyone who had seen him in this state—and it was with good reason. He usually felt fucking awful.
But right now, as Naruto's lips moved against his, pulling him closer so Sasuke could press him up against the car—
He didn't think he'd ever felt better.
He grabbed at the plastic bag in Naruto's hand—trying to get it out of the way, so Naruto could hold him properly—
Naruto's leg vibrated.
Sasuke pulled back, staring down between them.
"Oh—uh—sorry," Naruto pulled his phone out of his pocket, frowning at it for a moment—before turning a fierce shade of red.
Naruto glanced back at the restaurant, ducking his head a little—
"They—uh—they can see us," he gestured to the building—before his phone buzzed again, "oh my god, Kiba—"
He hissed, frantically typing something back—his eyes were bright and his cheeks were flushed and his smile was so—
"I hate my friends," Naruto laughed, fishing for his keys, "let's get out of here."
He was…so captivated by this man.
"Are we…heading to the monument?"
Naruto laughed, shifting the wheel as he changed lanes. Really, he shouldn't be surprised that Sasuke figured it out.
"How'd you know? Did I give it away?"
"There's nothing else out here."
Oh—well, yeah—that was actually a good point.
Naruto laughed again.
"Yeah," he glanced over, feeling Sasuke's eyes on him, "I grabbed like—a blanket and stuff. I thought we could bring the food up there. You mind?"
"I don't mind."
Naruto threw him a bright smile.
"Good, 'cause it's too late now."
Naruto flicked his turn signal on—they were barely a minute away, now—
"…why are we going up there?"
"Why not—just—the restaurant?"
"Oh," Naruto let out a breath, shifting a little, "I—um," he bit his lip, "I kinda wanted to be—just—alone with you. Like—just us, y'know?"
He turned the car, gently letting the wheel spin back against his palm—Sasuke always complained he was too jerky with it; that he waited until the last second to slam on the breaks and that he had no patience with acceleration, but he was being extra careful today. And Sasuke hadn't complained yet—so he took that as a good sign.
He was still quiet, though.
Naruto flickered his eyes to him for a moment—he could feel the weight of Sasuke's gaze—
"It makes me nervous when you're quiet like that," he laughed a little, "what're you thinking?"
It took Sasuke another moment to reply.
"…I'll tell you later."
Naruto raised his eyebrows, pulling into the parking lot.
"That—makes me even more nervous, y'know," he gave an uneasy laugh as he went for the first spot he saw, twisting to face Sasuke the moment he turned off the ignition, "did I do something wrong already, or…?"
Naruto didn't get the chance to finish the thought.
He smiled into the kiss, arms automatically reaching up to wrap around Sasuke, just so he could pull him closer—even though Sasuke was already doing a pretty good job of nearly falling into his lap—even though he was already grabbing fistfuls of Naruto's shirt, pulling at the fabric—Naruto felt like he could barely remember his own name—
He pushed forwards, scrambling at the seatbelt—grabbing at Sasuke the moment he could—if this was what Sasuke had been thinking, then—
Sasuke pulled away.
"The food's going to get cold," Sasuke said—still just as close, still halfway through crawling over the middle of the car—
"You're such a fucking tease," Naruto breathed, eyes glued to the way Sasuke's tongue darted out, just barely, over his bottom lip—
Those lips widened into a smirk—even as Sasuke's cheeks turned a bright red.
"Let's go, moron."
They had walked this path a million times.
The first time Naruto had shown it to him—sometime after they after they had stopped butting heads but before Sasuke had truly realized why—Sasuke had been vaguely worried that Naruto was dragging him off into the forest to have him killed. Or at the very least, to get the both of them hopelessly lost (in spite of Naruto's protests that he known the way since he was a child).
But then they had reached the top, the wind had swept through Naruto's hair, and he had turned to Sasuke with bright eyes and a soft, breathless voice and asked—
'Isn't it something?'
And Sasuke hadn't seen the view—he hadn't registered the monument, or the sunset, or the trees around them—
But he had nodded.
He wondered, now, if there was a part of Naruto that knew how deeply that day had affected him. It had been the first time he had seen the quieter, almost…meditative side of Naruto—the first time Naruto had seemed truly comfortable enough with him to show it. It had felt as if he had just been content just by being with Sasuke…like the way Sasuke felt, just being with him.
"The walk up always feels longer than I remember," Naruto laughed, glancing back at him. He hadn't let go of Sasuke's hand since they had left the car—not even when their makeshift path had narrowed, too small for two people, and Sasuke had been forced to trail behind him.
Sasuke hadn't protested.
"I'm so hungry now," Naruto laughed, "how're you doing back there?"
"I'm alright," he said—really, his stomach had been writhing around for the better part of the last hour, but he suspected that had more to do with the nerves than the hunger.
But they were nearly there, now—Sasuke recognized the way the trees started to become a little more sparse—a little more spaced out—the forest got just a little bit brighter, and—
Naruto heaved a happy sigh as they reached the clearing.
It wasn't as clear as it used to be, but there was still plenty of space for the two of them. Sasuke suspected it had largely been forgotten from the way everything had grown—from the way the trail was no longer maintained—from the way neither he nor Naruto knew what the monument was to…if there had been a plaque, or sign, or anything else to explain it—it was long gone, now.
Naruto put bag down, just on the ledge of the statue, reaching out for the blanket that Sasuke held.
"Not so close to the edge, moron," Sasuke muttered quietly, eyeing the way Naruto was laying out the blanket. It wasn't a sharp drop, but it certainly wasn't one Sasuke would imagine surviving.
"Aw," Naruto grinned back at him, "but I like kicking my feet out over the edge."
Sasuke was well aware—and it gave him a damn heart attack every time.
"That's because you're an idiot with a death wish."
Naruto only laughed, sitting down.
"What did you get me?" Sasuke sat—just so he could lean on the statue, and a little on Naruto—
"The one you got last time," Naruto passed it to him, "remember? You thought I ate your leftovers 'cause you didn't remember finishing them and you were soooo—"
Sasuke whacked the side of his head.
Naruto laughed, shifting over until his side pressed against Sasuke's.
He plopped his food in his lap, grinning at Sasuke expectantly. Sasuke raised an eyebrow.
"So…can I ask you a bunch of really personal questions?"
Sasuke rolled his eyes.
"Do I really have a choice?"
Naruto gave a soft laugh.
"Well, I'm gonna ask and you can tell me to fuck off if you want. Okay?"
Sasuke shrugged, taking another bite of his food. He had forgotten how much he liked this.
"I'm gonna take that as a yes," Naruto grinned, stuffing his food into his mouth, "mm, god, I'm so fucking hungry."
Sasuke snorted. It was hard to resist just closing his eyes—leaning against Naruto, like this…
"So are you gay or bisexual or what?"
"Huh," Naruto fiddled with his food a bit, "did you date anyone? You never told me."
"Not really." Sasuke felt a bit—uncomfortable, but—
He sighed. The closest he had come…
"I...hooked up with a few people," Sasuke shrugged, "they never…" Worked out—panned out—lasted…no one had held his interest for more than a drunken night or an awkward breakfast the next morning. No matter how blonde their hair or how bright their smile had been.
Sasuke turned, feeling Naruto's eyes on him. The blonde was staring, eyebrows raised, with no smile to be seen.
He sighed and shifted his food away from himself.
"What is it?" Better to have Naruto just come out and say it.
"Wh—oh," Naruto blinked—as if his emotions weren't written clear as day on his face, "I'm just—I'm just surprised. That doesn't really seem like your…style."
"Mm," he shifted, looking down at the blanket, "they weren't."
They had been drunken, messy nights at best. At worst…well, he wished the alcohol did a better job of blurring the memories.
Naruto let out a breath, and Sasuke felt the soft weight of his head on his shoulder. Still, he said nothing, and Sasuke felt the silence claw its way through him, squeezing tighter and tighter—
"…it's not something I'm proud of."
"Oh—no, I wasn't thinking that," Naruto sat up, running a hand through his hair, "I was trying to think about how I would've reacted if you had actually brought somebody back to our place."
Sasuke raised an eyebrow.
"Yelled at me, I imagine."
"Yeah, maybe," he shifted, running his thumb along Sasuke's forearm, "but then you could've called me out on being jealous."
Sasuke turned to face him better.
"Are you jealous?"
"Like, right now?" Naruto bit his lip, staring down at his hand on Sasuke's arm, "yeah, a little."
Naruto's eyes darted up to his—his mouth widening into a sheepish smile.
"Yeah," he ducked back down, shaking his head, "I know—I have no right to—like," he let out a breath, shifting in place again, "I dunno—I just—don't like the thought of somebody else…touching you."
Sasuke eyed him, avoiding the warm feeling in his chest just as studiously as Naruto avoided his gaze—
"Shut up," Naruto nudged him with his shoulder—Sasuke could see the way his face flushed.
Sasuke bit down on a smile.
"You're handling this all very well."
Naruto blinked up at him.
"What d'you mean?"
"Dating a man," Sasuke shifted, "dating me. Watching your ex-girlfriend get together with her best friend."
"Am I handling it well?" Naruto laughed a little, "I don't really know what I'm doing. I'm happy, though."
As if to emphasize his point, he grinned, squeezing Sasuke's thigh. Sasuke was very aware that his hand didn't move from the spot afterwards—
"And—y'know—the Ino and Sakura thing…it's not like it's anyone. It's Ino. And Sakura's my friend—before everything else," he tilted his head a little, staring out over the view, "it…makes me feel like I did the right thing, y'know?"
He let out a breath—like a happy sigh.
"I have another question for you," Naruto's head rested on his shoulder again—this time with a grin.
"How'd you realize you were gay?"
Sasuke gave an exaggerated sigh, rolling his eyes in the face of Naruto's grin.
"How did you realize you were straight?"
"Well, I obviously did something wrong," Naruto gestured at the two of them, laughing.
Against his will, Sasuke smiled.
"So help me out here, asshole," Naruto tossed his now empty food container aside, leaning on Sasuke fully, "you're the one who has it all figured out."
Sasuke wasn't exactly sure he'd put it that way, but—
"You just want an ego boost," he muttered, shifting in place. Naruto spun around, mouth open in a gape that was rapidly becoming a grin—
"Really? It was me?"
Sasuke shrugged, shifting his food away as Naruto crawled closer—he was nearly in Sasuke's lap, now—
"You looked at me and thought 'wow, that guy is so stupid, it's a good thing he's so damn sexy'—"
Sasuke shoved Naruto away from himself, unable to fight the smile as Naruto broke out into laughter. Naruto only rolled onto his back, looking up at Sasuke as he used his leg as a pillow—
There was a pause.
"Really, though," his smile softened, "are you sure?"
"I might—y'know," Naruto shifted a little, "if this is something you've been—thinking about for a while—I might not be what you expect."
"Like—you—you know you're kind of out my league, right? You have to know that," Naruto's voice was soft—Sasuke rested a hand on his shoulder to stop him from getting up, "I don't want to like…disappoint you. I feel like I'm gonna—"
"I might, though—"
"I'm cold," Sasuke cut him off, "I let my temper get the best of me. I say things I don't mean, and I don't like most people. I have more bad days than good. If anyone is going to regret this—if anyone is going to be disappointed—Naruto," he let out a breath—unresisting as Naruto sat up, this time, "out of your league—you—you're the one who—you just decided to be friends with me. Fuck knows why. I can't imagine why you would—I can't imagine why you are—I'm—"
He was so far gone in his own head—so focused on not looking at Naruto—that he didn't notice the blonde moving closer until it was too late—until he could feel the smile against his lips—
"Sasuke," Naruto's voice was breathless as he pulled away—his smile wide, "you are…so full of shit."
"First of all," Naruto eyed him, grabbing a handful of his shirt, "I never decided to be your friend," he laughed, "that was entirely by fucking accident. Don't give me that kind of credit—like I can plan or something—"
Against his will, Sasuke felt the laugh bubble up in his chest—he fought to keep it down, but he knew Naruto could read him far too well—
"And—second of all—you idiot," he leaned forwards, pressing his forehead against Sasuke's neck, "you're not cold. You're the total opposite of cold—especially when you're mad. You're—really—like…," he pulled back, letting out a sigh, "you're like—fire. Like, under the surface, you're really...passionate and emotional and you really honestly give a shit about the stuff you care about," Naruto ran a hand through his hair, "don't think I don't remember that time we saw that bird with the broken wing on the side of the road—"
"It was a hawk and I hardly think—"
"Sasuke," Naruto shook his head, "most people would've kept driving. Said it was someone else's problem—even if they did care. Especially if they had a massive interview half an hour from that point," he gave a small laugh and Sasuke felt his hand tighten its grip, "you—the stuff you care about, you really care about. And the stuff you don't—you never pretend about it," he glanced back at Sasuke, "y'know how rare that is in people? To be that—genuine?"
Naruto watched him for a moment—as if waiting to see if he would reply, but the lump in Sasuke's throat left no room for his voice—
"You make me laugh. More than anyone else," Naruto's teeth ran over his lip, as if trying to stifle a grin, "once I actually dug down far enough in your personality to find your sense of humour, anyway—"
Sasuke bumped their shoulders together—a small movement that Sasuke didn't have the strength to make any less gentle.
Naruto only smiled wider.
"You're my best friend for a reason, Sasuke," he scratched at his cheek, which had tinged red just a little, "I don't wanna say I like you more than the rest of my friends, but…" he gave a soft laugh, head tilting as if acknowledging the thought, "I do like you more than anyone else."
It was a miracle Sasuke could breathe at all.
He felt nearly stifled—consumed—by the weight of Naruto's words—the way the words had made him feel—Sasuke was suddenly endlessly thankful for the way his voice abandoned him, because he could feel some very familiar words stirring underneath his skin—
"Um," he saw Naruto's Adam's apple bob up and down as he swallowed, "what else did you say…?"
"I…" What had he said? What had Naruto said? He couldn't manage to move his mind past the way Naruto was looking at him—he swore he was moving closer, but— "I'm—I'm a man."
Naruto's face broke out into a grin as he sat back, laughing—Sasuke suddenly realized the blonde was barely an inch from straddling him and he had no idea when that had occurred—
"You keep saying that," Naruto rolled his eyes a little, grinning, "it's a little late for me to turn back now, don't you think?"
Sasuke felt something building in his chest—some part of him was screaming to stop—stop—protesting, because what if it worked? But his lips were moving and suddenly his voice had no problems coming out—
"No," stop, he told himself, shut up, shut up, shut up, "kissing is—is different. You could close your eyes and think of anything else—"
Naruto's face grew serious.
"I wasn't thinking of anything else." Of course he hadn't, Naruto would never—
"l—but—kissing is one thing, but if we move past that—if you—"
"You think I'm gonna pull down your pants, see a dick and run away screaming?" Naruto tilted his head a little—his eyes doing that thing where it was like they pierced right through him—like Naruto was just taking a moment to glance at his soul, taking in each and every thing that made Sasuke who he was—
Sasuke's mouth opened to reply—
"I'm gonna have to prove it to you, aren't I?"
Sasuke's mouth snapped shut.
Naruto gave a soft laugh, leaning in to press his face against Sasuke's shoulder for just a moment before he pulled back.
"Mmkay, I have an idea," Naruto grinned, and Sasuke knew this look very well, too—when Naruto glittered with some dumb idea and there was going to be no stopping him—although, it usually wasn't accompanied by cheeks that were quite that red—
"I'm gonna prove it," he said again, shuffling down Sasuke's body until his hands rested on Sasuke's hips—Sasuke sucked in a breath as they started to push his shirt up—
"Naruto, you don't have to—"
"Stop," Naruto leaned forwards, looking intently into his eyes, "you can ask me to stop if you don't want this—but, otherwise…trust me."
Naruto pulled back, but it was as if he was a magnet—drawing Sasuke to sit up with him. His shirt was off before he realized Naruto had started to pull at it again—and then—
He sucked in a breath.
"You can ask me to stop," Naruto watched him intently—looking for any signs of doubt, hesitation, or something else that Sasuke had stopped being able to feel long ago when it came to Naruto—
"Don't stop," the words shuddered out of his mouth like they were a breath—
He shifted off of Sasuke's lap—Sasuke automatically lifted his hips, so it would be easier for Naruto to pull at his clothes—for Naruto to—
—to touch him—Naruto was touching him, Naruto was touching him—holy fucking shit—
Naruto's hand moved slowly—tantalizingly slow, but Sasuke knew it was a pace set by exploration—Naruto was curious, he could see in it his gaze, from the way he was watching his hand move along Sasuke's cock—from the way he bit his lip as Sasuke didn't quite manage to stifle the moan when Naruto's thumb ran along his slit—
"Sasuke," Naruto's eyes were hooded—they had that dark look to them that was quickly growing to be Sasuke's favourite fucking sight—
He moved closer, his pace on Sasuke's cock slowing.
"We haven't kissed," Naruto's voice was soft—breathless, "you haven't touched me—and my eyes have been open this whole time, you fucking asshole."
He laughed—and Sasuke felt him gently grab his hand, pulling it until—
Sasuke stared at him, eyes wide, as Naruto pressed Sasuke's hand in between his legs.
"This is just from you."
Naruto was hard.
"Just from feeling you."
Naruto was hard.
"Okay? Do you get it now?"
Sasuke didn't know if it was this or the way Naruto's hand was still pumping him that made the pleasure spike—
"Can I stop torturing myself?"
Naruto smiled down at him—that fucking smile that said Sasuke was being an asshole but Naruto would indulge him anyways—and Sasuke nearly buckled as the pleasure rose again—it was building and building and Naruto's hand kept moving and Sasuke could feel his cock against his palm, pressing through the fabric of his pants—and oh god—this was—this was—
Sasuke didn't stand a chance.
He grabbed the back of Naruto's neck, messily crashing them together in an attempt to stifle himself—stifle the cry—stifle the words he knew he would say—all the tension, the build-up, the ecstasy released, rocketing through his body to the rhythm of Naruto's touch—he gasped into the kiss, riding out his orgasm as Naruto continued to move—
Slowly—slowly—Sasuke's mind came back to him. He felt Naruto's pace slow—felt him pull away from Sasuke's lips—Sasuke barely managed to stop himself from following them—
"I didn't really think this through," he sat back, looking at his own sticky, wet hand—
"S-sorry," Sasuke immediately sat up—fuck—Naruto probably hadn't planned to make him cum for fuck's sake—they were in the middle of the goddamn forest—
"I'm pretty sure this is more my fault than yours," Naruto laughed, "hang on—maybe they gave us some napkins or something—"
He sat back, using his clean hand to grab at the plastic bag their food had come in.
"Ahah!" He held up a couple napkins in victory, "jackpot."
He bit his lip a little, shuffling back over—Sasuke blinked in surprise as Naruto ran the napkin along his stomach—
"I can do it," he offered, eyes a little wide—
"I don't mind," Naruto's smile widened a little, "s'my fault anyways—and," he let out a breath, "I—want to focus on something other than, uh, myself, y'know."
He gestured down at his pants—which now had a very distinct bulge.
Sasuke's rational mind fled.
Naruto was here, in front of him—obviously turned on and obviously wanting something—what the fuck was Sasuke waiting for—
He pinned Naruto on his back, adrenaline spiking through his body—some part of him distantly realized the pants around his ankles really didn't provide much coverage, but with Naruto underneath him, he just couldn't bring himself to care—
"Naruto," Sasuke reached up, fingers stilling along the hem of Naruto's shirt—he wanted, so badly, to tear Naruto's clothes off—but—
"You don't have to—"
If Sasuke had been capable of it, he would have laughed in Naruto's face.
"You have no idea," his voice felt as if it was getting lower every time he spoke, "how much I—" he hissed out a breath, his hands trembling with desire, "Naruto—I—"
Sasuke's voice cut off as he felt Naruto's hand against his chin, gently pulling him forwards until their lips met—
"If you're waiting for permission," Naruto said, smiling as they pulled apart, "you have it."
The words sank into Sasuke's head slowly—tumbling through his mind over and over as if they would change if he listened to them long enough—but they didn't—they weren't—
Sasuke's hands moved up Naruto's body, underneath his shirt, pushing it up—and Naruto only helped him, tossing his shirt away, onto the grass—
He let out a shuddering breath, tracing a path along his skin—along the hem of his pants—along the tattoo on his stomach—
"I remember when you got this," he said softly, leaning down—Naruto's legs parted so he could slip in between them—
Sasuke gave him a look, still tracing along the pattern.
It had been torture.
The moment Naruto could show it off—the moment it had healed enough—it had been all he wanted to do.
"You didn't wear a shirt for a month," he squeezed Naruto's waist—tight—glaring up at the blonde—because that idiot—that gorgeous, sun-kissed, toned idiot—
"You kept telling me to touch it," he leaned closer, "you kept saying it, every time I said no—every time—" he paused, lips right above his skin—right above the swirl—
Naruto gave a soft, breathless laugh.
"I was trying to get you to tell me you liked it," Naruto's fingers threaded through his hair, "you never did."
"I like it," Sasuke whispered, pressing a kiss to the ink—it suited him, it had always suited him—Sasuke had barely been able to tear his eyes away from the moment Naruto had come back, grinning from ear to ear—
"Yeah?" Naruto's voice was almost like a sigh—Sasuke lifted his gaze just enough to meet it—
And ran his tongue along the swirl.
He had caught himself—nearly every day, he had caught himself—on the verge of reaching out to trace the path along Naruto's stomach. It had been hard enough to restrain himself when Naruto hadn't been calling Sasuke's attention to his body every waking moment.
He dipped his tongue into Naruto's navel, kissing a path down his happy trail—letting his fingers tap a path along the hem of Naruto's pants—letting them dip, just for a moment, under the fabric—
Naruto hips bucked up—Sasuke pulled back, just in time to see Naruto start to scramble with his pants—just in time to be able to help him, but he wasn't sure he was doing much at all with the way his hands were shaking—
He let out a shuddering, trembling breath as he sank back down between Naruto's legs—finally—finally—able to see Naruto, like this—he ran his hands up his thighs, swallowing the moan—
"Sasuke," Naruto's eyes were hooded, his eyebrows furrowed—Sasuke could see the way his hands clawed at the blanket, underneath him, "c'mon—"
Sasuke leaned down and bit the inside of Naruto's thigh.
He was going to enjoy this.
He ran his tongue along his skin, alternating kisses as he moved closer to Naruto's cock—he squeezed Naruto's thighs, his hips, his waist—and then back down, along the V of his Adonis belt—Sasuke felt the pubic hair brush against his cheek as he bit down again—softer, this time—
"Hmm?" He hummed, moving his lips along Naruto's skin until he could feel his cock stiffening against him—
He breathed out, slowly, trying to expel some of his desire—trying to keep himself contained, because this—this—
He stared up at Naruto as he finally put his lips on his cock—
This was a fantasy. This was a dream. This was something out of one of Sasuke's sleepless nights—when he couldn't rest until he closed his eyes, grabbed himself and moaned Naruto's name—
He let his tongue run up, slowly, twisting along the head, swiping along the slit—he could taste the precum already and it drove him fucking wild—
He gripped Naruto's hips and took him in completely.
This would sustain him for the rest of his life—just this memory, just the way Naruto trembled underneath him, just the way he moaned Sasuke's name, just the way his hands clawed at Sasuke's shoulders, at his neck, as if they couldn't decide whether to move up to Sasuke's head—
He grabbed Naruto's hands and put them on his head. Fuck going slow. He wanted Naruto to lose control—he wanted to drive him crazy, like he had done to Sasuke for so long—he wanted so much from this—
Naruto's hands curled, tugging at Sasuke's hair—it should hurt, Sasuke knew, but he was so occupied, so focused on the sounds Naruto was making—on the face he was making—Sasuke felt his eyes start to sting but he just couldn't close them, he couldn't miss a moment of this—not a single fucking second of Naruto—
Naruto's voice rose and his back arched and Sasuke felt it as his cock contracted—
"A-ah—! S-sas—don't stop—don't stop—"
He didn't stop—he couldn't bear to stop, not for a second, because this was Naruto—it was Naruto, filling his mouth, Naruto, who he could taste—Naruto, who he had wanted for so long—
Naruto collapsed beneath him, and it forced Sasuke to pull away. He didn't realize how desperate for air he had been until just now, when he was gasping for breath—
Sasuke pulled back a bit further, eyeing him with some trepidation—what was it with Naruto and laughing after moments like these—
"Fucking hell, Sasuke," Naruto laughed again, throwing his hands over his eyes, "is there anything you're not good at?"
Sasuke felt his face flush—which was ridiculous, because he could still taste Naruto's cum in his mouth—as he pulled back. He wiped at his mouth again, as if it would give him an excuse not to reply—
Naruto sat up, heaving a breath as if it took an incredible amount of effort, and pulled Sasuke forward to meet his lips. Sasuke felt his eyes flutter closed—felt his mouth respond, even with his brain unable to—
Naruto pulled back.
"I think," he wiped at his mouth, making a face, "I think I can taste—uh—myself—"
Sasuke pushed himself back.
"Sorry," he muttered, and now his face was definitely burning, because he had opened his mouth without even thinking—he should have at least grabbed some water or something, of course Naruto would find that disgusting—
"Hey—wait, no—" Naruto caught him by the arm the moment Sasuke tried to pull away, "no—fuck, Sasuke, don't apologize—"
He laughed again, pulling on Sasuke's arm.
"Just—you didn't have to swallow," Naruto shuffled closer to him, "you know that, right? I don't want you to feel like—"
"I wanted to," Sasuke cut him off. Honestly, Naruto was so worried about all these tiny, inconsequential things—the idiot didn't realize he could ask for pretty much anything and Sasuke would give it to him, forest or no—
"You—you sure? It doesn't seem...like—uh, very pleasant."
Sasuke gave an awkward shrug.
"It's not great, but—it's…" Sasuke swallowed, looking away, "it's yours, so..."
He shrugged again, busying himself with gathering their clothes—really, him and Naruto had been rolling around in the middle of a forest nearly completely naked for far too long, now—
Naruto grabbed his arm.
The kiss was soft, this time, after Naruto gently spun him around. Light—tender—full of something that made Sasuke's mind dissolve into a shuddering mess. Naruto's fingers brushed his chin, moving around to his neck—he pulled back only to place another kiss on Sasuke's lips, and then another, and another, and the lump in Sasuke's throat was suddenly back in full force—
He gave a soft laugh as the pulled apart, his forehead resting against Sasuke's.
"I can't believe," he whispered, "I didn't realize I felt like this before."
"Um," Naruto laughed again, "but, yeah—if I—if I haven't made it obvious enough," he pulled back, scanning Sasuke's eyes, "I really like you. I want you to know that. Like I—I definitely really feel it. If you—"
Sasuke put a hand over his mouth.
"We should go home. Put your clothes on."
He stepped away, heart swollen and twisting and beating out of his chest—
Sasuke tossed a shirt in his direction—Naruto barely seemed to notice it—
"Did I say something wrong? If I—"
"No," Sasuke said immediately, still too afraid to meet those eyes, "we need to go home."
"Why?" Naruto moved closer, grabbing Sasuke's arm again, "Sasuke, you—"
"Because if you keep talking, I'm going to start kissing you and I'm not going to stop," he took in another breath, trying to get ahold of himself, "and then we'll never make it home, so—just—"
He gestured helplessly at Naruto, plastic bag in his hand. He made the mistake of looking up, at Naruto's face—at that fucking smile—
"Naruto," his voice was pained—Naruto really needed to stop looking at him like that—
"Okay," Naruto threw his arms up in defeat, still smiling, "okay, fine—but you gotta start kissing me as soon as we're home. Deal?"
Sasuke rolled his eyes and turned away, trying to still his beating heart.
He didn't even let Sasuke get his shoes off before he slammed him up against the door. Knowing that Sasuke was barely restraining himself—knowing that he had been restraining himself for so long—it had made the car ride feel a million years long. The way Sasuke had looked at him—
Naruto pressed his hips in between Sasuke's, the kiss deepening as Sasuke's hands wrapped around him. This felt so good. This felt so good—
Sasuke's phone rang.
Naruto broke the kiss—grinning at the noise of protest Sasuke made—but only moved his attention to Sasuke's neck, instead.
"You can answer it," he let his lips move against his skin—
"It's Itachi," Sasuke muttered, head rolling to give Naruto better access, "I don't want to."
Naruto grinned against his skin.
"Mm, I dunno, Sasuke," he pressed another kiss to Sasuke's neck, "I think you should."
He ground his hips against Sasuke's to emphasize his point.
The phone rang again.
Naruto's smile widened—who knew that Sasuke could be so obedient…
He could vaguely hear Itachi's voice, through the phone, but he didn't really care why the guy was calling right now.
"...did you need something?" Sasuke's voice had absolutely none of the bite it usually did—it was only breathless, now—
Naruto reached under Sasuke's shirt—under his pants, heard the hitch of breath as Sasuke noticed—
He felt Sasuke tense, and Naruto paused.
"How did you—when did you—"
"It's true, then?"
Their eyes met.
Naruto grinned and placed a kiss smack dab on Sasuke's lips.
Itachi said something else, then, and Naruto didn't manage to catch much more than—
"—half your life—"
—but he did notice Sasuke's face flush as he hissed a flustered, "fuck off, Itachi—", twisting away from Naruto—
Naruto used it to his advantage.
Sasuke's neck was exposed—and so was his stomach. Naruto ran his tongue along Sasuke's skin as he played with the button of Sasuke's pants—and then the zipper—
"Um," he heard Sasuke breath in, swallow, and then breathe in again, "um, sorr—what?"
Naruto reached into his pants and grabbed his cock.
He heard Sasuke suck in a breath—heard Itachi, saying something, although Naruto had no idea what it was—but he only ran his tongue along Sasuke's skin, pumping him slowly. It was weird, how soft and smooth Sasuke was—fitting, in a way, because all of Sasuke's skin felt way nicer than it should—
"I-Itachi, I have to—"
But Itachi interrupted him, apparently, and Naruto only gave a soft laugh. If anyone could control themselves, it was Sasuke—and Naruto had a lot to pay him back for, teasing included.
"Naruto's, um," Sasuke swallowed, "busy."
"He can talk to me later," he nipped at Sasuke's ear, "tell him I'll treat you right."
He laughed at the small noise Sasuke made in response to that—and then the next one, as Naruto felt the precum leak out of Sasuke's cock (it made it so slick, so easy to move)—
"I—yes, I—I'm listening, Itachi—"
"No you're not," he whispered, pressing closer to Sasuke—he felt Sasuke's thigh shift, underneath him—against him—and he knew Sasuke could feel how hard he was, too—
"Can I—just—let me call you back," Sasuke breathed—and from the looks of it, he didn't even give his brother a chance to reply before he hung up the call, phone clattering onto a counter somewhere as he grabbed a fistful of Naruto's shirt—
Naruto stumbled back with the force of Sasuke's kiss—which was, apparently, what Sasuke intended, because he was pushing forwards—forwards (backwards, for Naruto)—and Naruto just had to trust that he wasn't going to trip and fall over something because he really, really couldn't keep himself away from Sasuke right now—
The back of his knees hit something, and he nearly fell back—and then he did, because Sasuke pushed him—he didn't even get a chance to yell at the asshole because then he was on the couch and Sasuke was crawling over top of him, lips swollen and panting and eyeing Naruto with a look so hungry that he felt himself shudder in anticipation—
"Can this date count for two?" Sasuke breathed against his lips, hands grabbing fistfuls of Naruto's hair—it took a moment for the words to register in Naruto's mind—
"It can count for three—" he laughed, wrapping his arms around Sasuke and kissing him again. He felt so comfortable—so natural, so easy—
Sasuke pulled back, eyes wide.
"Is that too eager? I don't care. I want to." He sat up a little, just so he could get closer to Sasuke, "though I dunno how we're gonna or anything and I probably should—uh—read into it or something now that I think about it—I don't even know if I have lube—"
"I have it," Sasuke said softly, "are you sure?"
"Yeah," he nodded, "are you? We don't have to."
Sasuke gave a low laugh, his head falling to rest on Naruto's shoulder.
"...you're being an idiot again."
Naruto gave a surprised laugh—he hugged Sasuke closer.
Sasuke let Naruto pull him to the bedroom. He wanted to catch any hint of hesitation—or doubt—or regret—
There was none.
There was, however, a blushing, damn near shy smile on Naruto's face—and it was driving Sasuke crazy.
"So, um," Naruto spoke up, just as they reached Sasuke's doorway, "how do you want to…?"
Sasuke raised an eyebrow.
"I assume you're more comfortable one way than the other."
Naruto gave a soft laugh, pulling the door shut behind him.
"Well, yeah, but if you're not—"
Sasuke responded by grabbing Naruto's shirt and falling back onto the bed. Naruto laughed again—into the kiss, this time—as he pressed between Sasuke's legs, as one hand wrapped around Sasuke's thigh, pulling it up, pulling it closer—
Sasuke sighed some mix of desire and contentment against Naruto's lips. They felt every bit as perfect as Sasuke had known they would—and every bit as addictive. His love for Naruto had always been dangerous (too powerful, too consuming) and with every touch of Naruto's skin Sasuke felt it growing steadily fiercer—
Naruto gave a gentle tug at Sasuke's shirt, and Sasuke obeyed—sitting up, tossing it away, pulling at Naruto's, too—
And then Naruto's lips were on his hips, his fingers tracing a path under the hem of Sasuke's pants, and Sasuke felt his world quake under the force of his desire—he fought to only grab Naruto's hair, not to tug at it, rip at it, pull him so close that he would have no choice but to melt against him—Sasuke could feel his fingers, shaking in time with the rest of him—
"Lift your hips up," Naruto's command was soft, gentle, but Sasuke still felt the words swim through him with an intensity that left him powerless to do anything but obey—he lifted his hips up and Naruto grabbed his pants by the hem—it barely took a pull after Sasuke realized—
Naruto leaned back down.
"Naruto—" He didn't have to—he didn't have to—
"You're leaking, y'know," he felt Naruto's breath against his cock, teasing him with its warmth—with that smile—
"You don't have to—" his voice broke as Naruto's thumb swiped over his head, spreading the precum along it—
He pulled back, eyeing his thumb for a moment before giving it an experimental lick.
"...it's not that bad," Naruto said, "I could get used to that."
Sasuke's breath nearly came out as a whimper.
Naruto's hands moved back to Sasuke's hips, gripping them as his kisses followed—as they trailed along his hip bones, moving so close that Sasuke's cock pressed against his cheek—Sasuke bit back the moan, but a strangled breath still escaped him—
Naruto gripped his cock and met his eyes.
"You gonna tell me to stop?"
"No," Sasuke answered, thinking Naruto must be fucking insane if he thought—
Naruto's lips wrapped around him, and Sasuke's train of thought evaporated.
"Ah, god," he crumbled back against the sheets, hands scratching at them—he needed to grab something—anything—to keep himself grounded—to keep himself from cumming—Naruto had barely started and Sasuke was already—
But it was so warm and wet and Naruto was looking at him, watching Sasuke as he moved—Sasuke made the mistake of meeting those eyes and he felt the pleasure rear up as if ready to—
"Wa—wait," he pushed at Naruto, "wait—"
Naruto wiped at the saliva with the back of his hand.
"Sorry," he said, "was it not—"
"It was good," he cut the moron off the moment he had the breath, "it was too good, you idiot—"
"Oh," Naruto's face immediately brightened, and he gave a soft laugh, as if of relief, as he moved forward to capture Sasuke's lips. But Sasuke's hands caught him by the hips, and he immediately set about getting rid of those damn pants Naruto was still wearing—
He grabbed Naruto's cock the moment it was free, relishing in the small moan Naruto gave in response—
"Sasuke," Naruto warned, "I'm close too—if you want this to last—"
"Bedside table—second drawer."
Naruto was off of him in a heartbeat—though one hand still rested in Sasuke's, squeezing it slightly as the drawer opened—
"Um," Naruto glanced back, "we need a condom, yeah? 'Cause—like—otherwise—"
Sasuke glanced at him, eyes half-lidded.
"It can get a little uncomfortable, yes," he said quietly. He knew Naruto was clean—he knew he was, too. It wasn't as if going without was something he was opposed to, in the future, but for their first time—
"Okay," Naruto breathed, smiling at him. He moved back to Sasuke, bottle of lube in hand and condom slipped between his knuckles, and Sasuke realized, with startling clarity, what was about to happen.
He let out a trembling breath.
"You okay?" Naruto crawled closer, looking earnest and caring and beautiful and—
Sasuke kissed him.
It was maybe less—maybe more—Sasuke could never get the timeline to make sense in his head, but it was nearly half of his life any way he looked at it. He had spent so long feeling like this—
Naruto pushed him down, stopping halfway over crawling on top of him.
"You wouldn't've had to wait," he whispered, kisses moving across his face, "if you had just told me, you bastard."
Naruto's laugh filtered through him, then, and Sasuke realized he must have been saying some of his thoughts out loud—
"I don't want to hurt you," he felt Naruto's breath against his ear, "tell me what to do."
Sasuke nearly laughed at the thought—but his heart had awoken once again and had decided that his nerves had been still for far too long—
"I need to—stretch," or be stretched, which was preferable, but he was anywhere but in a place to ask Naruto right now—
"Can I do it?"
"Is that okay?"
And Sasuke did laugh, then—a disbelieving, breathless laugh—because Naruto was just so clueless, still, even now, with Sasuke lying naked underneath him and his love for Naruto dancing on the tip of his tongue—
But his tongue became otherwise occupied—by Naruto's own laughing mouth—as whatever Sasuke had managed to convey, Naruto had obviously understood. He heard the cap of the lube flip open—
"Be generous," he told Naruto's mouth, which made a small noise in response—and then he felt his body shift and Naruto's shifted, too—Naruto's lips left his and Sasuke's legs lifted, on their own, his body responding to even the barest of Naruto's touches—
"Slow," he whispered, as he felt the first finger touch—felt it push, against him, "you can use two—"
His breath hitched as Naruto obeyed, and Sasuke tightened his arms around him, already feeling himself start to shake—
"Does it hurt? Are you—"
"It doesn't hurt," he sealed the words with another kiss, "spread—ah—slow, like that—"
He relaxed himself more, letting Naruto's fingers sink further into him—letting himself sink further against them, further into Naruto's arms—his breaths started to match the rhythm that Naruto had found—
"Let go of me for a sec," Naruto whispered, and Sasuke realized that his arms had been steadily growing tighter, around Naruto—he loosened them, barely avoiding voicing the protest when Naruto's warmth left him—
But it didn't leave, not fully—it only moved down, and Sasuke sucked in a breath as that warmth came back in full force, around his hips—the cap clicked open and Sasuke felt a third finger slowly press inside him, but he was far more focused on the way Naruto's tongue was running up his length—
"A-ah," Sasuke felt the crack in his voice before it even came—he felt Naruto's tongue, swirl around the top of his cock, run along the slit, teasing him, testing him, "Naruto—"
"Hmm?" Naruto hummed, lips wrapped firmly around his cock—
Sasuke only gasped his name again—his thoughts were fragmented, messy wisps of what they should be, broken up by the pleasure that seeped through them—if he had felt good before then he couldn't even describe this—
"Na-Na-ah—!" His orgasm rose up and so did Sasuke, reaching out, grabbing Naruto's hand so hard he knew it must hurt—
Naruto looked up at him, pulling back with wide eyes.
"Was it not—"
"Too good," Sasuke desperately tried to catch his breath—tried to catch his mind—Naruto's fingers were still inside him, but they had stilled, now, "you—hit my prostate."
Sasuke gave a shuddering nod.
"Like—here?" Naruto pushed forwards again—
"A-ah!" Sasuke sprang up, back automatically arching—it wasn't usually so much so fast but he had been on the edge of cumming for so long now, "d-don't—"
He grabbed Naruto's wrist again, shaking his head.
"I'm not going to last," he pushed Naruto's hand away, turning to look for the condom—
Naruto kissed his cheek—trailing down to his chin, his neck, behind his ear—
"Are you stretched enough?"
Sasuke turned to meet his lips, whispering his agreement against them—he assumed Naruto heard it (or felt it), from the way he used the kiss to push forwards, to push Sasuke on his back—Sasuke wrapped his arms around Naruto, lifting his knees so the blonde's hips could slip under his—
Naruto pulled back—Sasuke forced himself to let him. The condom wrapper flittered somewhere to the floor, but Sasuke's eyes were glued to Naruto, stretching it over himself—spreading the lube over his cock—Sasuke's mouth was so very, very dry—
Naruto's tongue darted out against his lips as he leaned over Sasuke again.
"Can we…" his hands wrapped around him, pulling Sasuke up to straddle his lap, "like this…?"
Sasuke only gripped his cock in response, smiling at the gasp it brought him—he positioned it at his entrance, letting his legs slip apart a little further—
"Sasuke," Naruto's breath was the only warning Sasuke got before he was kissing him again—soft, slow, beckoning Sasuke to melt against them—
And melt he did.
"S—ah, oh f—" Naruto broke the kiss to clutch him close, to bury his face into Sasuke's neck—Sasuke could feel the way his breath trembled—
Sasuke sighed, again, and let himself sink lower. Naruto felt slick and warm and all around him—running right through him—blocking every one of his senses in that way that only Naruto could—
Sasuke let his head roll back, let his hips roll forward, and started to move.
It felt like something crucial—like everything Sasuke had felt had built to this. Naruto's hands gripped his hips, moving them together with gentle pulls and subtle pushes—his breathing was broken up by the soft moans, pieces of Sasuke's name as if Naruto couldn't quite get out the word—but if Naruto felt half as consumed by Sasuke as Sasuke felt by him—
"Naruto," he breathed, emotion swelling in his chest, "look at me."
Naruto obeyed, blinking up at him with clouded, red-rimmed eyes—Sasuke caught his face in his hands, pressing their foreheads together as he continued to rock with Naruto—Naruto let out a breath, and then another, and then he was smiling so bright Sasuke felt half-blinded by the sight—
"I knew it," he laughed against Sasuke's lips, "I knew you were so—fucking—"
He cut himself off in a breath that sounded dangerously like a whine, and there was a beat where Naruto's fingers dug into his skin as if trying to rip him apart—
And then it was gone, Naruto's touch gentle once again.
"You're holding back," Sasuke whispered.
Naruto blinked at him.
"I don't w—"
"Don't," Sasuke interrupted, "don't you dare."
Naruto's eyes met his, and something dark flashed in his eyes—
"Then you can't either."
—something like challenge, like teasing, something that matched the way his grin slanted to one side—
Sasuke matched it.
He leaned in—close enough to brush against Naruto's lips but not quite to kiss them—
"You think you can break me, Uzumaki?"
Naruto's eyes flashed again, and he felt the breath let out against his lips—
"You think you can break me, Uchiha?"
Naruto's hips thrust up, as if to emphasize his point—Sasuke did all he could to bite back the gasp, but he felt his back arch into the sensation, as if it was automatic to meet Naruto in kind—
Naruto gripped him tight—
"If it hurts, even for a second—"
"I'll tell you," Sasuke hooked his legs around Naruto's waist, "hurry up—"
Sasuke barely had a second before his back hit the mattress.
Naruto pressed him down, still gripping his hips—pulling his hips to meet Sasuke's, even as Sasuke tried to meet the thrusts as they came—thrusting in, in, in, in—
Sasuke threw his head back and unlinked his ankles—Naruto understood, lifting his legs until they rested on his shoulders—until Naruto held them, there—
"I never knew you were so flexible—" Naruto's voice came, and Sasuke opened his eyes to meet Naruto's laughing eyes—
"A-ah—!" Sasuke's comeback died in his throat as Naruto thrust forwards again, "there, there—Naruto—don't sto—"
Naruto obeyed—so well, he obeyed—he didn't stop, he didn't miss, not a single moment, not a single time, and Sasuke felt like he was going lose his mind—
"Na—" he clutched at Naruto's skin, "Naruto—I—"
"Sas—s'ke—look at me," Naruto pressed against him—Sasuke could feel him start to tense, start to tremble—Sasuke's pleasure expanded tenfold—
He opened his eyes.
"Sasuke—" Naruto stared down at him with something so close to affection—something so close to lo—
Naruto's eyes widened, but Sasuke's mind already went blank, back arching into Naruto's touch as the pleasure released—as it overcame him, rushed through him as if it was the blood in his veins—whatever he said, whatever noise he made, was completely out of his control—
He heard Naruto cry out—he felt it as he came, inside of him, inside of Sasuke, oh god—Naruto crumbled forwards as Sasuke's legs fell off his shoulders, he clutched Sasuke to him—
"—you too," Naruto breathed into his ear, "I love you too, Sasuke."
Sasuke's eyes snapped open.
He sucked in a breath—and then another, and another, and he still couldn't find the air to fill his lungs—
"I think I always have."
Naruto's voice was soft but his arms were tense, still wrapped around Sasuke so tight that Sasuke could feel the way they shook against his skin—
"Idiot," the word shook free of his mouth with the breath, "took you long enough."
Naruto's breathless laugh rang through the room.