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Puppy Kisses

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Castiel circled the room like five times. I yawned as I watched him, laying my head on Sam’s neck.

The dark haired angel was looking for any sign of danger. He finally seemed content that there weren’t any other Layeks in the room, gave me a stiff thumbs up and stepped out the door. He was off to help Dean figure out how that ugly thing had gotten into the bunker in the first place.

Pft. What a worry wart, I thought, scooting on my tiny paws to lay on Sam’s neck again. He stirred, sighing softly.

I sat up, sticking my nose against his cheek. I had to wonder what he was dreaming about. I hope it’s me, I thought dreamily. I laid my head down and closed my eyes. I didn’t have to guess, actually. I could just hop in there and see!

- - -

I found myself standing in the backyard of a cute little beige house along a quiet street. The sky was brilliantly blue with wispy clouds moving so slowly that they looked like a painting. The air had the aroma of fresh coffee and flowers. It was all a little overwhelming after the dark gloomy bunker.

“Gabriel!”

I turned and saw Sam stepping out of the back door, a big bowl of salad in his hands. He didn’t look as happy to see me as last time.

“Hey Sam! How’s it hangin’?”

The hulking brunette sat the salad down on a cute white picnic table and came over to me, wrapping an arm around me. He squeezed me tight. I returned his embrace shamelessly.

I leaned back to look up at him, beaming.

“Man. You look great.”

Sam’s sad expression finally broke as he smiled back at me.

“You always say that,” he chuckled, one of his hands resting on the small of my back. I shivered.

“'Cause it’s true,” I purred, leaning against him. He let me go and took a step back, looking uncomfortable all of a sudden.

“Gabe…don’t.”

I shoved my hands into the pockets of my olive drab jacket and shrugged.

“Sorry. Wishful thinking, I guess.”

“Yeah,” Sam mumbled, poking a finger at the side of the salad bowl. It was then that I caught a glint on his left hand.

A wedding ring.

My heart sank. I swallowed, trying to prevent the lump from forming in my throat.

“You’re married,” I managed. I wanted to add ‘why the hell isn’t it to me?’ but I kept that to myself. This was Sam’s dream, not mine.

“Yes. Look,” the tall man moved closer again, reaching a hand out to rest on my arm. “I’m sorry. If I wasn’t married, didn’t have a dog…I don’t know. We just missed our chance, okay?”

He was looking down at me with those horrible sad puppy eyes. I nodded, letting the tears forming in my eyes roll freely down my cheeks.

“Y-you have a dog? That’s cool,” I choked, covering my face with a hand. What was wrong with me? Why was I still standing there?

“Gabriel, I’m so sorry—”

Before I could warp myself outta there — Sam woke up.

- - -

“Shh, it’s okay boy.” His gentle voice was accompanied by a hand on my head. Sam picked me up and kissed my snout. “It was just a dream.”

I whimpered, trying to curl myself into a ball while he held me up in the air. I guess I had been crying too loudly.

Gee, sorry for waking you up, Sammy — oh by the way, you were being a TOTAL A-HOLE. Get the hell away from me, I thought angrily.

But he kept holding me and petting me and being perfectly sweet. It was really starting to piss me off.

Last time, Sam hadn’t remembered his dream. He had no control over it. I knew he hadn’t made this dream that horrible on purpose, but I couldn’t stop crying.

I just wanted one freaking moment — just one — where Sam and I were happy. Not me as a dog, not Sam married to someone else. Just the two of us.

Sam left me in bed, crawling out and venturing out the door. I guessed to the bathroom, since it was still hella early.

I lay there seething. I wasn’t mad at him anymore. I was mad at myself. I had done it. I had tricked MYSELF.

Good job, Gabe, I thought sadly, pawing my way over the covers. I sat my rump down on the end of the bed, watching the door and listening as the toilet flushed.

This gig was up. Being around Sam was like hopping over a fire while covered in oil. I was gonna get my ass crispy fried.

Transferring back into my human form, I sat on the bed and waited. I couldn’t take it anymore. It hurt too much.