Chapter 1: Its Retarded Isn't it?
"You aren't going to, are you." That was not a question, but a fact.
"Simmons, I just don't care enough to do that, I mean, I gotta walk all the way down the ramp, and that's simply to much work."
"God dammit Grif, i'll be right back"
Simmons walked down the ramp, and into the base , called out to sarge, who was (obviously) meticulously cleaning his prized possession, the almighty shotgun, "Sarge?'
The Sargent (who may or may not even be a Sargent) whupped around "Simmons! I told you not to interrupt my cleaning sessions!"
"Sorry Sarge, but the blues are attacking."
"... Simmons. Get in the Warthog. GRIF! GET TO THE DAMN WARTHOG OR I'LL HAVE SIMMONS PUT TARANTULAS IN YOUR NEXT MEAL!"
"*sigh* YES SIR!"
As Grif brought around the Warthog Sarge called out the Donut, who most definitely was in pants, "GET SUM PANTS ON, AND GET IN THE ALIEN THINGY"
"WE DON'T WANT TO KNOW!" Grif cut him off
A few minutes later, they were heading across the teleporter, and Simmons pointed out, "This seems to be rerouted to somewhere else."
"Yes, It suddenly changed while everyone was sitting around, and the decided to go through it." and feminine voice came from behind them.
They turned around the see the Blues tank.
"So, they just left you here?" Simmons asked
"Yes. Caboose was very sad. I am too large to enter the portal."
"Wow. That must suck." Donut said, feeling somehow sorry for the tank.
"Yes. Very much so, However, you should follow them, I strangely feel they will need the help."
Simmons agreed, Donut didn;t know what was going on, Grif just didn't care. Sarge was the only one with a complaint of course.
"But it's the BLUES! we can't help them!"
"Sarge, a portal appeared out of nowhere, this is bigger than Red vs. Blue."
"Oh, alright."They all looked to the portal and went through.
Chapter 2: In which, we start a second fandom train!
hoo boy, i hope i'm okay at writing undertale characters...
i should clarify that the rvb chapter started a little after everyone returned to blood gulch
"nah kid, i already did 29, thirty, that's okay, but 31? i couldn't"
Frisk frowned at sans, and asked one more time for another hot dog. (?)
"yeah, i mean i would if you had 29 on your head, but you don't. so i can't. sorry."
Again Frisk frowned, before trying to very carefully shuffle towards the lab and they were about to make it to the beginning of the bridge to it when her phone rang, shocking her into causing a cascade of hot dogs and cats. sans was laughing terribly hard, and Frisk made it a point to slowly eat one while reaching for her phone.
"HUMAN! I WOULD JUST LIKE TO ASK, DO YOU PREFER HOT DOGS WITH OR WITHOUT THE HEAD?"
sans' laughter doubled at the coincidence, and She sighed, and told him she liked them with the heads.
"THA- WHY IS SANS LAUGHING?" Papyrus whisper-yelled, "IS HE TELLING HORRIBLE PUNS AGAIN?"
Frisk told him he wasn't, and that she had to go.
"OH! WELL WHEN YOU COME BACK I'LL HAVE HOT DOGS FOR YOU!"
She thank him, and hung up, "so, hot dogs with the head, huh? i think he just knows."
The door to the lab whooshed open and Alphys and Mettaton (box) hurried out, "Eep! H-h-hello, h-human."
"Oh sans, why is there hot dogs everywhere? Actually, i don't want to know, but what i do want to know, is why there is a group of heavily armored... things that appeared out of nowhere!" Mettaton asked completely rhetorically.
The 'armored things' chose that moment to walk out into the heat.
"Nope, to hot, goin back inside." Grif said immediately, not caring about the collection of monsters before them. He wheeled around and was stopped by Sarge, "What in Sam Hell do you think your doin?"
"Goin back inside, i so damn hot out!"
"The hell you are! Turn your as around, because that lava is lookin real good right now."
Grif smartly obliged and turn back around, by this point everyone else was staring at everyone else.
"What. The actual hell are you people?"
"i could ask the same to you."
and then a third portal opened, dumping all of them to:
"Oh god, why was it Here?"
It, of course, was the recruitment center in which Grif, Caboose, and Tucker had all signed on.
"alright. no who would like to explain what the hell is going on here?"
Caboose said "a portal put us here from the place you-"
"No Caboose, we don't need that." Church cut him off, "Not a single clue, we want to know as much as you do."
Then the police came.
"So who would like to explain why non-registered species and Spartans were breaking into a recruitment center?"
"Buddy, we didn't break in we were teleported."
"Sure, because there is totally a teleporter to that room. Anyways whats your Spartan numbers?"
"Our what nows?"
The captain was beginning to think they weren't even Spartans. "Every Spartan has one, a three digit number."
He was met with looks of confusion and sighed, "Get Cortana in here."
"Because they have real armour but don't seem to be Spartans, no go!" ('this is gonna be a long night...')
Chapter 3: Surprise motherfucker
and straight from a mostly abandoned canyon, we see some more of the rvb characters, and some new ones as well!
Oh god, I can't really write Sheila or Lopez that well.
"Sheila, ¿dónde están los idiotas?"
"Hello, Lopez. They went through a weird portal thing a few hours ago, but in any case where is the purple one? I have a shell with his name on it."
" Me escapé y volví aquí, con suerte no me siguió"
(yeah i don't know what that's about)
"Hi guys! What are you talking about?"
"hey, lo encontré"
"I found thunk. out how to get rid of O'THUNK.Mally! Isn't that just great?"
"Yes." THUNK "Okay, what the hell is that?"
"H-holy shit, it isn't even blocks anymore!"
"Hey Cat! Come look at this!"
"Hmm? what do you want Lake?"
"I uh- I'm really not surre? Just come look."
"ok-aaaaaaaaaay? what the hell."
"Hey! Liz, we found a thing!"
"Oh yeah? what?" she walked towards the tunnel Lake was digging and came upon, a green, swirling, thing? "Oh Notch. Send help. Please.
"Looks kinda like a nether portal, huh?" Lake had already dug out around it, and found that it was thing thickness of a portal to the nether.
"Yeah, I guess it does..." Cat had came around to look as well, he pulled out a stick and threw it through, "Did it come out the other side?" The rectangular portal was completely opaque, and he couldn't see through.
"Nope! So, it's either a portal, or, well, it disintegrates whatever it touches."
"Well, one way to find out!" Lake said, stepping forward.
"No." Liz stopped him.
"Why not? I'll just... Oh yeah, They put it on Hardcore, huh?"
"Yeah, they did." Cat said.
"Whelp, just partly put part of a stick through." Lake suggested.
Cat pulled out another stick and pushed it through and pulled it back out before his hand touched it.
"Huh. It's still good, go head and try, Lake."
He stepped up to the portal and stuck his head through.
"Uh, yeah. We're good..."
After the three of them had moved through the portal, and Liz had put a torch down, they found themselves in a tiny room with rocks on all sides, they pick one of the walls and set to mining diagonally upwards, until they started hear a robotic female voice, some spanish, and a seeming friendly male talking.
"We're getting close!" Lake exclaimed."
"We know. I mean We're not deaf."
"Okay, okay, i see your point."
The rise and fall of their pickaxes against the rocks were creating a steady THUNK noise, and before long they made door into, a not blocky world.
"H-holy shit, it isn't even blocks anymore!"
"Qué. Los. Real. Infierno."
"Oh my. That dosen't seem psychically possible..."
"Hi! Nice to meet you, weird block people! I'm Doc! Who are you?"
"Uh, Hai? I'm Cat, This is Lake, And Liz. and you are?"
"Lopez el pesado"
"I am The M808 Main Battle Tank, but you can call me Sheila."
"And I'm Doc!"
"Okay, before we move any further with this, we need to explain some shit." Cat said
"Agreed." Sheila replied.
"Well Sargent, They Do seem to have authentic armour that didn't belong to a different Spartan, but they aren't registered."
"Huh. Well, You people, tell us what actually happened." Johnson directed at the monsters and Not-Spartans (cuz i dont know if sim troopers would work here)
"We've been telling you, that is what happened!" Church snapped at him.
"Could i request the security tape, sir?"
"Sure Blue lady."
He brought out the tape, even though it never showed their entrance.
She scanned it quickly, and muttered, "As i thought."
"What is it?"
"Well, the fact is, you can see a glow, and and hear a noise, so maybe they did come through a portal."
"Hmphh. I suppose."
"Yes pretty lady?"
"Can you get the Chief in here?"
"Whatever you say."
“So, because the most intelligent A.I. you know of can’t figure it out, you JUST GET SOMEONE ELSE IN HERE? WHAT FUCKING UNIVERSE DOES THAT WORK IN?”
Church was losing his shit by this point, any everyone else scooted a small bit away from him,
“DON’T THINK I DIDN’T SEE THAT U SUUUUUUUUUUUUUNSSSS A BITCHSESDSAASSSSSSSSSSSSSHOLESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!”
Now they just stared in awe as he somehow as a ghost-robot-thing named Church had a aneurysm.(Although those outside the RvB cast didn’t know it obviously)
“Roight mate, calm yer knockers.” A Australian Marine restrained him, (because Jesus Christ Sarge makes weak bots) and, he did, albeit slowly, calm down.
“Alright, now that whatever the hell just happened there is done, Chief, get on with it.”
But suddenly, jump cut!
Trevor tried to look cool while riding the elevator, however, failed horribly, instead, looking as though he was half stretching, and ending up mildly retarded looking. When he reached Keith's lab/garage/weapons testing facility (yup. I am happy with this. In fact i am so happy with it, im pointing out how happy i am) Keith himself was humming some blues. (guess which gulch)
“Yo, what is that?” Trevor asked, pointing to a contraption with a green rectangle in the middle.
“Oh!” Keith stood up, “That’s a portal i’ve been working on. We should be able to go anywhere in the universe. Orrrr we could of course just randomly teleport into the sun or somethin’ but, eh, i’m working on that.”
“Uh, sureeee, but why do we need it?”
“Because if i’m correct we can teleport ta ‘any ‘game’ we want!”
“Ok, that would be cool.”
“I know, right?”
Jump cut 2
Keith woke to a sharp pain in his shoulder, and a rotting, standing , corpse at the end of his bed, who promptly fled the room.
He stumbled to the light, flipped the switch and slid down the wall, as the knife buried in his shoulder drained his energy. By this point Trevor had taken notice from his room, and opened the door and came upon this scene.
He pulled out his phone and called an ambulance, and rushed to get him to the door.
“So, this is where the 'portal’ left y'all?”
“Well, I am picking up increase radiation levels. Nothing lethal of course, but still.”
“See? Can we go now?”
“We’ll hold you back at base till we're sure your telling the truth.”
sorry i've been gone for awhile, but i am releasing this for y'all, i won't be here next weekend due to family tho.
Chapter 5: Melody PT.2
ARE YAAAAAA READDDAAAAAAYYYYY TAAA RUMBLE?
Oh yes, i should mention that Undertale is actually canon to Keith's universe. Except only Chara fell. Meaning they won't (probably) ever get out. Sad ain't it.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Papyrus had long since finished the hot dogs, and had even made a quiche, and some spaghetti. The human and sans had yet to return. He was going over to his phone when Undyne smashed the door down.
“Papyrus!! Where in Asgore's beard is Alphys! And sans, and Frisk, and Mettaton! But mostly Alphys!”
“I HAVE NO IDEA! I WAS ABOUT TO CALL THEM!”
“UNDYNE PLEASE DON’T BREAK THE TELEVISION!”
It was, however, to late, for Undyne had already suplexed the T.V. Just because she can. And, also, she was pissed.
“SANS IS GOING TO BE MAD NOW!”
The suplexed T.V. was thrown out the window.
By some form of hidden magic, Papyrus, from the kitchen “Papyrus?” managed to catch the T.V. Undyne’s eyes widened, not due to the “Undyne!” fact that he caught that, but because they didn’t have a window.
Asgore’s voice boomed and the two froze. A mantra of ‘oh shit’ could slightly be heard from Undyne.
“Where is your brother?” he continued in a more mellow tone. “He has somehow converted my throne into hot dogs.”
“What. the. WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?”
“Oh my god Keith you’re back!”
“No. I’m a fucking floating asshole A.I. that looks looks like someone you know.”
“Your a dick.”
“I pride myself on it.”
“So, any news?”
Keith moved over to the living room table.
“Yes actually,” He laid some research papers on the table. He had compiled them while sitting in bed, using only his right arm.
“So, that portal, it wasn’t always there, even when turned on, and that was because it was creating gateways between places all the time. Its pattern has been:” He indicated one, “Red vs. Blue to Undertale. Undertale to Halo. Halo to a Void like middle ground. Minecraft to Red vs. Blue. and finally, Undertale to the Void.”
“And what does that mean?”
“Well, Considering the fact that a rotting corpse stabbed me with a, well, oddly familiar knife, ima go with The Flood and a Chara A.I have made it to the Void. A place where you can freely teleport to and from anywhere in the-” Keith’s phone rang. After picking it up on speaker he and Trevor heard:
“KEITH! OH THANK GOD! GET IN THAT DAMN BOT OF YOURS AND GET OVER HERE! BRING TREVOR! SOME THINGS ARE TRYINA GET IN!”
They popped up as Astyn, the caller, hung up, dashing into the lab, Keith sitting down in the cockpit of his mech, and Trevor in his.
Keith’s was a tall, yet slightly bulky humanoid mech, with a grenade launcher hand that had a sowrd extending off it, and room for two on turrets. It could move blindingly fast, and, being a mech, was quite strong.
Trevor’s was a motorcycle-like craft that had small auto-cannons lining it, and four blades coming out the front.
They rolled out, and on the way across the city tore through many Flood, Trevor running them through, while the cannons did their work, and Keith was using mostly likely unessacery, but FUCKING AWESOME moves.
Quite quickly, however, it was over. They had reached Ashtyn’s house, and it wasn’t good. It seemed that the majority of Flood had congregated on his house, as if he had something they needed.
Keith crushed a cluster of them with his foot, and blew another to hell. Trevor crashed through the back fence and ran down many Flood Carriers. He spun around and threw one of his magical fireballs and struck one that was alarmingly close. It almost instantly fell dead.
Then Astyn kicked open the front door and sent his mini-gun flamethrower cross to work on the remaining forms, while Connor, rolled in from his house, and took a box out, and layed down a sentry. It mowed down anything Flood-like.
“Alright. We just caught wind of another portal. You’re free to go.”
“D-did a-a-anything come through?”
“I… honestly dunno…”
“well considering we did, you might wanna check that. i mean… it could be a army of ketchup. that would be a problem.”
Frisk lightly slapped sans.
“What’s yo name, bonehead?”
“Because on my grave i want ‘sans The Bonehead Made Me Suicidal.’”
“.......... i’m just going to let that slide.”
“Ooookay. Well. See. Because I’m much too lazy (“FINALLY SOMEONE GETS IT!”) You can go check it out yourself. (“FUCK YOU MAN!”)
Mettaton glared at Grif “Oh come onnn. It doesn’t really matter”
Then Mettaton’s chest exploded into a ball of fire as the flaming arrow penetrated the central heart, where the ghost lived. At least he didn’t feel anything.
Everyone ducked behind a wall or something. sans shot cyan bones up to cover all windows and doors. The Reds and Blues readyed their weapons, Alpys cowered in a corner.
The sight of Mettaton's shell filled Frisk with determination for revenge...
three whole pages, my god this is the longest thing i've ever done.
P.S. the knife is a artifact as explained in beginning notes, undertale is cannon, and instead of Asriel taking the sould, she murdered him, and went on a rampage. I might make a backstory page if you want
Chapter 6: Let's Have A Go At It.
Daily dose of factoid!
Connor's sentry is built to accept marks that certain people have that is on a surgically implanted metal plate. this will stop it from shooting anyone with it. Notice why Keith, Trevor, and them don't get hit.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Frisk tried, god, she tried, harder than any RED souled human should, but the yellow star wouldn’t come to her. All that would was a flash, and some blood on the ground.
(WEEOOO exposition alert(ALSO GQ IS GREAT YOU SHOULD TOTES READ(it’s DT science inspired this one)))
“DETERMINATION. The will to live. Defined by its vibrant RED color. Every Red soul had unique abilities. The two most important was their MARK, and SAVES. A stable amount of DT would create a red MARK, however a underlying factor could create a unstable amount of DT. No one knows what this factor is. However, unstable DT will cause issues in uncontrolled systems.”
Who the fuuck? This person likely would have answered, if it wasn’t for ANOTHER. FUCKING. PORTAL.
“heh. that, that is some shit luck.”
“OH JESUS CHRIST!”
“W-vev been heree so looong.”
*What a nightmare!
Oh! These guys! Is Alphys around? Snowdrake’s Mother, the only one still capable of speech replied, “F...ooll….”
“Stop. Before I lose my tiniest shred of sanity I still have, WHAT THE FUCK.”
“so. you know how we’re monsters right? well what if you pump a substance we can't handle into half-dead monsters? apparently we melt. alot. they grasped each other, waiting for the end. why do you think i quit my career? i had to sit and watch."
They pixelated robots dropped over the ridge, falling the blast of Sheila's shells, or the arrows of Lake, an excellent shot, or ran into Liz’s or Cat’s sword, while Doc cowered in Blue base.
It was going quite well until those that would become to be know to them as Fleet Overseers blew everything to smithereens and Spidertron’s explosives furthered the damage
Sheila’s cry of despair signaled what they were all realizing. They were fucked. As a explosive removed her barrel, a laser tore through the chassis.
Another, one known as a Mark 4 Swordsman, made it into Blue base, and came upon Doc, who had already fainted, saving him from death.
“It was then, by means of… deus ex machina?”
“Nah mate, but Keith, Trevor, Connor, and Asytyn came outta nowhere. You think we should expand on that?”
“Yeah, that would be great.”
“Okay. Dafuq?” Connor inquired immediately after everything was dead.
“Yes. Good idea. Wha?” Astyn added.
“Weeeell… See I did this thing where there is inter-universal travel now and also I may have might made a dimension on accident… and now things that you would consider from video games are gaining travel with it? Maybe?”
“.-. This is why we don’t let you touch shit. Ever.” Connor’s sentry perked up and destroyed a Infection Form scuttling towards a corpse.
“Here’s an idea, howzabout we go and you take us to saaay, Undertale? We could get monsters, then we figure out how to introduce them to somewhere… with say better weaponry.” Suggested Asytn.
“I don’t see a problem with that.”
“I’ll get on it then…”
The title is a reference to maybe a game. that's all your getting
Chapter 7: But then.
oh christ. this took so long to write and i don't know why. send help plz.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Wait a sec. If we’re here, doesn’t that mean we can find everyone else?
“heh, guess it does.”
Alpyhs finally uncurled from a ball at the prospect of meeting back up with Undyne. And everyone else to.
“Who are the everyone else?”
Undye, Paps, and Asgore.
Toriel would almost definitely not show up however, which. Well, great. You had so much to tell Mom. Sigh.
“Is this good for my health?”
Weeeeelllll, Undyne maaay try to murder you, but… You should be fine. Probably.
At that moment Sarge, Caboose, Tucker and Simmons chose to come through another portal.
“Dammit, here I was hoping I would have been able to permanently decrease the moron count…” “HEY!”
“What is a moron.”
“IM GOING TO PUT A BOOT UP EVERYONE SINGLE ONE OF YOUR ASSES.”
“Oh what the fuck.”
“Okay, see i couldn’t connect to Undertale right now, least not permanently, a few quick jumps happened across, well, everywhere, but I can take us to RvB. which technically isn’t a game but. Eh. Close enough.”
“Well if it’s useful to us. Then ok.”
“Well we might get those weapons we were wanting.’’
“Right then, let’s go.”
They moved through the portal to find themselves on a desert plateau near a box canyon.
(“I mean if i-”) Keith was muttering to himself
“Worry about that shit later.”
“Right, yes. Okay, let's see what we got.”
They moved towards the canyon, to come upon the scene of mass destruction that resided there. By this point some of the robots had taken notice of them.
“Really shoulda brought the Bots.”
“Yeah, no shit.”
They slid down the cliff, and went to work on the Robots, who had already taken notice of them.
Keith was clothed in his normal battle attire, which consisted of black jeans, shirt, and trench coat, with cyan highlights as to match his weapon of choice, a large scythe, that could also function as a lance, or 50. Cal machine gun, a small pad built into the side, that would be flipped as to not accidently press a button, allowed him to do various things such as blow the blade, or charge it with electricity. All of this came with one weakness, it was slow going to lug around this heavy thing, and as such, those agile enough could screw him over easily.
He flipped the pad, and shocked the blade, swinging it into the first wave of bots, disabling them, with ashtyn setting his sights on the Fleet Overseers, far in the back, sending a hail of bullets to greet them.
Taking advantage of the cover, Connor set up a grand total of 6 sentries. Anything slipping by the circle of tangled robot limbs were cut down, that was until, a Overseer’s beam blew 2 away, removing a large part of the fire from him, and Connor was forced to go on the defensive, cutting and poking bots with his knife.
That Overseers who destroyed the sentries was cut down by directed fire, from Keith’s scythe, who was panting on top of a small hill of battered and burnt robots husks, “Is… Is that all?”
“I would hope so.”
“Well shall we see if anyone’s left?”
“Yup. Th-at sounds good… Just… one minute, k? This damned thing is heavy.”
“Yeah, yeah, sure.”
“Checking to make sure the portal will stay up.”
“... ok then.”
Factoid 2.0 :
Keith's scythe abilities are as follows: Blow the blade, cause a electric shock, explode a cap that contains heated, spent shell casing from the 50. cal, switch between scythe, lance, and 50. cal, activate jets, to dash forwards. There you go, maybe more will be added in the future, but that's it for now.
Chapter 8: ???
I like to think Blood Gulch is on a special ring, that is actually inhabited, allowing for the flood to get more bodies.
The flood had slowly encroached upon the small section of the ring that housed so much, and gained many bodies of those unlucky enough to be there in the way. The pushed back assault on Keith’s home planet had well and truly pissed him off. He would not be rejected once more.
As they came closer to their surprise attack on the canyon, a certain person guarding the portal saw them and slid down into said canyon, “The Flood, they’ve come!”
“Oh my god. I think they might have developed their own portals, or you can just go anywhere from the Void. Doesn’t really matter right now though.” Keith was musing to himself, “Trevor if would be so kind as to get our bots that would be nice.”
“Ok… They should be coming from that way.” He pointed past Red Base, Where you could almost see a cloud of dust rising up, before turning and clambering up the cliff side, and ducking through the portal, returning in Keith’s mech with his attached to small metal protrusions ment for situations such as this, one down again, he detached his, and revved the engine. Connor was finishing up on some more sentries, and, well. Ashtyn really didn’t have much to do but wait.
After Keith had hopped in, the first wave of bouncing infection forms, shambling combat forms, waddling carrier forms, and scuttling pure forms came down the cliffside, and charged.
Of course Sarge could never put that boot up everyones asses. So Grif got it. Even though he had nothing to do with it, Grif got the boot.
“Oh come on! It’s was Church’s fault!”
“Alright. Here’s the thing. Y'all can do… whatever it is you need to, but i’m going to stay here and wait for a portal home.” Tucker put forward.
“WHEN WE GET BACK I WILL KILL ALL OF YOU.”
“Probably a good idea. Not sure how staying here would go.”
And such continued, both the Reds and Blues were in unanimous agreeance on this.
“Right we’re gonna need help here. I’m going to try to open a portal to Undertale on the field. Try not to die.”
“Alright! Hurry up!”
A portal open outside the house, and they went through, much to the objection of those from Undertale. After they had all made it through, Keith closed it.
“How…? Nevermind. We need some halp here.”
By this point some Flood had began streaming around the canyon to reach them. One who had managed to snatch up a sniper put a end to Donut.
For once in his life Church managed to hit a target, and multiple times at that.
“Everyone in the canyon!”
They slid down to wall to come upon many scraps of metal that were once sentries, and a myriad of spent shell casing littering the small incline where Connor, Trevor and Ashtyn had taken cover, Trevor using his weapon of choice, a simple sword, his motorcycle missing a wheel and many blades, with dents peppering the metal.
The Reds and Blues took positions around the base of the hill, while Keith, having re-entered his mech, and checked the crumbling bases, coming upon the still quite fainted Doc. He checked to make sure he was still breathing, and put him down on the side of the hill, for his safety, before rolling out and launching a grenade into a wave of combat forms coming down the cliffside, as Trevor hopped into a turret, where he would be much more useful.
The sheer number of bullets overwhelmed the flood, creating a outgoing circle of bodies as the assault was pushed back, Allowing room for even more sentries to expands as well, using repurposed metal from the robots, whom were intermingled with all manner of flood.
The final cluster was put down by a wide arc from Keith’s sword. He disengaged himself from the seat, and hopped out, putting two holes in a infected marine.
“So. Welcome back to your gulch, a warzone.”
“Um,” Church whispered into his ear, “What happened to Sheila? Caboose is… a little attached to her.”
Lake, Cat, and Liz picked through the bodies, and greeted them while a good ‘ole, “What. The. Actual. Fuck.”
“Oh you know, attack of the robots. Then, Zombies. It’s normal. I think.”
“How is tha-”
“And… He found it. Of course he did.”
The came upon him sobbing next to him, “Yo, maybe, we should… give him some time?”
“Yeah. Best for him.”
Chapter 9: Sorrows of the Stupid
Caboose never slept. Perhaps that affected his mental state, but, well he didn’t care. All he needed was Sheila, and he would die happy. But… That had been ripped from him by things that weren’t even supposed to be in this galaxy, but… fuck you, they are now! Because of him , and he couldn’t stand it. He removed what was left of ‘Sheila’ that program that made her personality, and left…
Picking a random direction, he began walking, not really planning on going anywhere. It was just an attempt, because he knew, whatever happened, he would get a good outcome: he dies, or saves Sheila.
Any option was preferable.
They had managed to get most of the upper-thousands of bodies in to mountains that you could pretty much climb out of the canyon on.
The ??? in question raised his head, “Yeah?”’
“Could you go check on Caboose? He’s been gone for quite a long time.”’
“Pfft. Hell no! TUCKER!”
“GO CHECK ON CABOOSE!”
“JUST DO IT YOU CUNT!”
“... OK…. FUCK YOU THOUGH!”
“OK! JUST DO IT! Alright. Well. I’m going to sleep now. Don’t wake me up or i’ll have someone put a stick down down dick.”
“Fine whatever. You still need to help later, though.”
“Eh, i'm sure Sarge will do it.” With that he went into Red base was stone cold in 3 seconds flat.
“Okay, I think all of the bodies are in the pile now.” Simmons came down from the outside the canyon followed by Sarge.
“Griff’s sleeping I presume?”
“Ok. Sarge you have permission to shoot right next to the head to wake him up.”
With a “OOOOH YEESSS!” Sarge ran up to grif on the ledge. A crack of his shotgun a Grif flew at least 5 feet in the air.
“ALRIGHT EVERYONE, TAKE A BREAK!”
“But I was just sleeping!”
“Yo, so, I can’t find caboose?”
“Well. I guess he’ll show up later… well, go fuck off, i need to get back to fixing my mech.”
“You should call it the ‘Painis Machine’ sounds nice.”
“Huh. I like it.”
Keith was welding a tear in the leg as he heard a mountain of bodies, both flesh and metalic, falling.
“YO! EVERYONE! OUT HERE NOW!”
Everyone came out, and the one who did it is…. No one?
“Shit. CABOOSE?” No answer, “Damnit, get your weapons.”
A minute later and they were climbing the side, which had a new ladder installed after the battle. When they reached the top, a slap, and “Dummkopf!” “Sorry Doktor.”
“Aw, piss! Someone's here!”
Eight heads snapped towards the group, and the german’s mouth closed with a snap.
“Well hot damn, we ain’t in a wasteland!”
Caboose collapsed in the middle of nowhere, and realised it was quite likely the end, and swore, “In the name of Sheila, I curse Keith!” He knew it wouldn’t work, but still… it was something.
“Christ, no, fuck no, go get your ass outta here, and don’t interact with me, i already have these morons, at least 4 universes on the verge of falling apart due to multi-universal paradoxes, i would normally invite you all to help, but i can't fucking deal with this shit right now. In fact fuck all of you, i don't even know what trevor and them have been doing, but i’m going home, im done.” Keith slid down the slope, climbed through the rubble of Blue base, and entered the teleporter after a minute of fiddling, it blinked offline a little later.
“What’s his problem?” The Scout asked.
“ I Dunno? “ Simmons replied
No one spoke about those people who came through the portals. It was a mutual agreement, what good would it do? The other monsters would lose their shit and that wasn’t really necessary. But then H E showed up, and went on a path a destruction. And that really was why a trap had been set, every surviving monster would be waiting in the Judgement Hall and would spring once sans had gave him a talk.
The one i question was heard before he was seen, the unmistakable scraping of a scythe much too heavy, and mutterings the he was ‘almost done’, had ‘less shit to do’. When he did come around however he had kept his clothing together and was only coated in a light layer of dust. From afar, he looked normal, but that wasn’t true was it?
“so. hows it goin? i suppose i hoped that you were trying to be decent, and just messed something up, but no, i suppose you have to kill everyone you meet, right? but, for what?”
“FOR WHAT? TRY BECAUSE IF I DO THIS, I HAVE ONE LESS FUCKING HELLHOLE TO WORRY ABOUT ONE LESS THING I GOTTA MAKE SURE DOESN'T CAUSE A DISASTER, AND HERE’S THE THING, M’KAY? I. DON’T. CARE. ABOUT. YOU. OH AND I KNOW YOUR DAMN TRICK TO, THEY HAVE TO BE HERE SOMEWHERE, I LOOKED EVERYWHERE ELSE. SO, THANKS FOR COLLECTING THEM I SUPPOSE. SEE YOU IN HELL!”
“but why not just try and fix it? be the better person.”
“I’m going to explain it carefully. You are just DUST nothing more, nothing less. I am stronger than you, you could cause me problems, however, by killing you, i prevent said problems, while getting the added benefit of becoming stronger. Survival of the fittest, right?” And he fired the shotgun on his scythe towards him.
next chapter will be directly after this... i hope
Fact of the chapter: Most OC names are actual people. However it has nothing to do with the character themselves. I just can't come up with names. I'm sorry.
Chapter 11: Hell Frozen Over
A swipe and a miss. Monsters flooded from both entrances to the hall. He spun and lashed and connected with Muffet. He wasn’t really aiming for her, but it worked and sent them into a panic. He was getting conflicting feelings, trying to remember why he was doing this again. It was…
…….. He stopped.
Cant no. keep…… swing, shot. Connections. Why was he doing this again? Or… was heeeeee?
He felt something peirce his foot, but kept lashing at anything near. Stab. electrical swing, more shots. He pushed himself to continue for this… this unknown something that was surely important.
The hallway was covered with dust. sans watched as Monsters ran towards him, and just. KEPT. D Y I N G. at last, it was just him, asgore, and Undyne.
He seemed unfocused. Squinting he asked, “Um… Ahhhhh…. Trevor? Did.. Did you get shorter? And… Fucking Fat as shit? I can’t seeem. M . . . . . Why. who? I think i need a minute.” And stumbled out of the room.
“What. Did that moron get hit in the head or something?”
“i…. think it’s him tiring out. means it’ll be easier to deal with him i suppose.
“Okay. Im back. Only needed three root beers. We good. Ima kill ya’ll now. Goodbye.”
He walked out into the hallway a smug look on his face, an it wasn’t completely unwarranted. He had probably already won. Undyne dove at him spear extended, to be stopped by a singular bullet that tore a hole that was already pooling with dust.
“Well…. Th...ats unfortu…….nate?”
“YOU SON OF A BITCH!” Asgore was blinded with rage, falling into the same trapping as Undyne, running towards him without thinking, and instead of shooting, he sliced and two pieces slid apart, dissolving.
“well, guess we’re here again, huh? i’m not gonna be as easy to kill.”
“Well then, how is your dodging skill with fire? ”
The scythe blade had already converted into a nozzle, it spat fire towards him.
It was getting harder and harder to dodge, as the fire crept closer and closer to him, and finally, just finally, a flame touched him, and he fell.
“Well, That will be that,” Keith said, leaving. “Your levels were nice!”