Work Header


Chapter Text

10 Months Old

Spock watched the sa-mekh person stand up from his chair and placed the item he had had in his hands on the table. Sa-mekh walked out of the room.

Spock eyed the item. He wanted it.

He dropped the teething toy he had been chewing on and crawled off his blanket and made his way over to the table. Walking was fairly new to him so he crawled instead. When he was before the table, Spock grabbed the edge of it and pulled himself up.

The sa-mekh person plays with this…thing…a lot, Spock thought. PADD. He calls it a PADD. I want to play with the PADD.

“Spock, sweetie, did you pull yourself up?”

Spock turned his head and looked at his mama on the couch. He liked the mama person. She was warm and nice and had food for him. Spock resisted smiling back but he failed.

“Oh, there’s a big grin,” she cooed.

Spock shook his head and looked away. She was a distraction to his goal: the PADD on the table.

“Are you hungry, Spock?”

Spock reached a chubby hand out to the item and then paused. Food? Why yes I am…no. PADD first and then food. Spock placed his hand on the item and intended to pull it closer when suddenly…

“Spock, rai,” the sa-mekh person appeared and took the item from Spock.

No? Why no? I want it. Spock stared grumpily up at sa-mekh. Sa-mekh looked down at him. Spock frequently looked at himself in the mirror that was upstairs. He thought he and sa-mekh looked alike. They had pointy ears and slanted things over their eyes. But he had his mama’s eyes he had been told.

“This is mine,” sa-mekh told him.


“Sarek, he’s curious,” mama said. 

Spock looked back at his mother. Yes, curious. I like that word. Make him give it to me, Mama. Spock pointed up to the PADD. “Mama, ad.”

“Yes, that is your dad,” she replied with a smile.

No, not dad. I do not know what a dad is. PADD. “Ad!”

“Sa-mekh,” sa-mekh chimed in. "I am your sa-mekh."

Spock looked up at him. Yes, that is you, but I want the PADD.

“Sarek,” his mama said again. "Let him play with it."

Who is Sarek?

“Amanda, he was curious yesterday in regards to my books. He pulled them all off the lower shelves then used one as a teether.”

My mouth hurt and I need to chew on something, Spock countered. “Up!” Spock made grabby hands up at sa-mekh.

Sarek placed the PADD down and when he went to pick up Spock, Spock moved away and went for the PADD again.

“Mine,” Spock repeated.

Mama chuckled while Father shook his head. Spock sat down with it and patted a chubby hand against the screen. It turned on. His eyes widened. "Oh." he said

Father sat down beside him and pulled Spock into his lap. “I was intending to teach you about computers and PADDs when you were a bit older, but we can begin today.”

Okay, Spock thought. But first. Spock held the PADD up. “Mine.” He bit down on one side.

Father sighed above him while Mama chuckled. The PADD was taken from him again as Mama stood up and walked over. She knelt down and picked Spock up.

“Why don’t we go eat, Spock?” she said, adjusting him on her hip.

Oh alright. I do like food. Let us go.

As they started to walk away, they heard Sarek mumbled, “She’s mine, too.”

Chapter Text

23 Months Old

I am related…to this? Spock stood next to where his mama was sitting and watched his cousins putting on a silly show for the family. Spock shook his head. They had tried to get him to participate but he laid on the floor and refused to move so the cousins moved on with their plans.

Illogical, he thought as the show came to and end and people clapped. Suddenly he was picked up. Spock blinked as he was turned around and found it was his mama’s dad who was holding him.

“Hey, Spock,” the older man smiled at him. “Can you say grandpa?”

“Gampa,” Spock tried.

The man chuckled. “Close. How about Poppy? You can call me Poppy.”


The grandpa/poppy person looked away from him but still held him. “Mandy, he looks just like his father.”

“I know, I know,” he heard his mama say. “Has my eyes though.”

Grandpa/poppy looked back at Spock. “Which happen to be my eyes too. Spock, can you say Hanukkah?”

I am not a sehlat to do tricks. “Han-kah.” Okay, put me down now. I need to look at that tree again…the Christmas one. Spock squirmed and the grandpa person put him down. Spock rushed over to the colorful tree and looked up at it. He liked it. Whatever it was for was illogical, but he liked it. He looked at all the presents underneath. He liked them too.

Spock touched a big present. Mine. Oh, and that one is mine too. And this one and…

“Okay, it is time to like the menorah,” Spock heard a relative say.

And then my presents.


Spock watched his Mama’s mama put the menorah in the window sill. He had been told it was something called Hanukkah, a Terran Jewish holiday that his mama’s family’s celebrated during the winter time. Spock looked past the menorah outside and saw the snow falling outside and scrunched up his face. He did not like the cold wet precipitation.

“Okay, my grandbabies, time for your presents,” his grandmother said.

Oh, yes, the presents! Spock thought before he quickly followed after his grandmother, getting to the small pile of presents before his illogical cousins.

“Now, Spock, we have this one…” his grandmother tried to hand him his present, but Spock saw a bigger one and grabbed that instead.


“No, no, that is for Lester.”

Spock shook his head. “No, t'nash-veh.”

“Spock,” his mama called his name. “Listen to your Grandma.”

Spock looked at his mother. “This mine.”


Spock made a grumpy face and then grabbed another present. “This mine too.”

“Spock.” His mother walked over. She gently took the presents from him and handed them to their rightful owners while Spock stared grumpily at them. She then picked him up. “No, Sir.”


His mother carried him out of the room and into his grandpa’s study where his father was sitting and reading a book.

“He tried to claim his cousin’s presents as his own.”

“Presents are illogical,” his father said.

His mother huffed then placed Spock in father’s lap. “Spock, you are in time out for five minutes. Why?”

“My presents,” Spock said.

“No, sir. You have one present for the first night of Hanukkah. The others are not yours.”

Spock made a grumpy face. “Not mine.”

“Right.” Mama sighed. “Vulcans. You are like cats. Always claiming something.”

“We are not like cats,” his father said.  

Mama gave father a look then said, “Five minutes, Spock.” She then turned and left.  

Spock looked up at his father. He grabbed the book. “Mine.” He then opened the book and stared at all the words he didn’t understand yet. He looked up at his father. “Read peas.”

“In Vulcan.”

“Telv-tor sanu, sa-mekh.”

Sarek nodded and began to read to him.

Chapter Text

Age 3

Spock watched his Mama get out of the car after his sa-mekh has parked the vehicle. He father then got out. The backdoor to where he was sitting was opened a moment later. Spock immediately grabbed at the buckles keeping him in his carseat.

“Spock, let me…” his mama tried but Spock pushed her hands away.

“No, I can do it, Mama.” Spock fiddled with the buckles and soon had it unlatched. He looked at his mother with a triumphant blank-faced expression.

She smiled proudly at him. “Good job, kan-bu. But remember, do not do that while we are driving.”

“I know.”

She helped him out of the car and as soon as Spock’s shoe-covered feet hit the ground, he took off towards the nearby steps.


“Spock, cease,” he heard his sa-mekh say before Spock felt the back of his outfit grabbed and he was lifted off the ground. His father carried him back over to the car.

“See,” his mama said. “I told you putting him overalls would be beneficial.”

“Hmm,” his sa-mekh responded before placing Spock on the ground beside him. “Do not move.”

“Yes, sa-mekh,” Spock said. He looked back to the stairs. I could make it though but these overall things. Spock looked down at himself. At least there is a big pocket in the front to collect sea shells.

“I’ll grab the blanket, you get the basket,” his Mama said. They were to have a picnic, whatever that was. Spock had never been on a picnic.

“I do not want to swim,” Spock looked up at his parents and said. He liked the seashells and the sand, but he did not like the water.

“No, swimming, Spock. Just a picnic,” she replied. “Take your father’s hand so we can go find a nice spot.”

Spock eyed his father who eyed him back. I wonder if I will be as tall as him. His father held out his hand and Spock dutifully took one of his father’s fingers to hold. They then headed to the steps and down to the beach where they followed Amanda to a flat spot. She laid out the blanket and Sarek placed the basket down.

Spock released his father’s hand and walked a few feet away to pick up two shells that were on the sandy beach.

“Mine,” Spock said as he tucked them into the overall’s front pocket.

“Sa-fu, come here and eat,” his sa-mekh called to him. Spock walked back to the blanket and sat down with his parents. His mother placed a small plate of foot in front of him and a fork. Spock stared at the food before taking a few bites. 

This is adequate. 

“Thank you for suggesting the picnic, ashal-veh,” his father said after a few moments. “The food is delicious.”

Spock looked up from his own food to his father’s. I want that. He stood up and walked over to where his father was sitting. Spock stood in front of his father.

“Spock, you need to…” his father trailed off as Spock turned and sat down in his father’s lap. He then grabbed his father’s wrist of the hand that held a fork with some pasta looking food on it. He pulled the wrist close and took a bit of the food from the fork.

He liked this food better. “Mine.” He took the fork from his father and helped himself to another bite of his father’s better food while his mother laughed.

“Spock, sweetheart, you have the exact same food on your plate,” his mother told him.

Spock shook his head. "Rai." This food was better.

“It is alright, Amanda,” his father said. Spock then felt his father kiss the top of his head. “But we should speak of his possessiveness over things that are not his soon. It is getting illogical.”

“You are just jealous that I-Chaya likes him more than you now,” his mother replied.

I-Chaya is my sehlat, Spock thought, still eating his father’s food.

“I-Chaya was my sehlat first,” he heard his father mutter in Vulcan. “But it is cute how he plays with Spock.”

Yes, because he is mine. And I am not cute. I am a Vulcan.

"What was that Sarek?"

"Nothing, adun'a."




A while later, after they had eaten, Spock sat in the sand and arranged his sea shells in front of him. He counted six. Six pretty ones of varying sizes that he would take home to Vulcan and show I-Chaya. He picked up one that was multicolored.

Mama would like this one. He looked behind him and made a face. His parents were laying on the blanket together. Their mouths were against one another’s. That is not sanitary. Spock shook his head and looked away. Parents were weird.

He heard his mother giggle a moment later and then some shuffling before his mama sat down next to him. She carded a hand through his hair. “Sweetie, you’re going to bed early tonight.”

“Amanda,” his father sighed.

What? Why? “Bedtime is at eight,” Spock told her. "I got to sleep at eight."

She chuckled and nodded. “I know, I know. What precious seashells you have there, Spock.”

“For you.” Spock handed her the multicolored one.

She smiled. She held it to her chest. “Thank you so much. I’ll treasure it always.”

“Illogical.” Spock put the rest of his seashells in his front pocket for safe keeping. He ran his hand through the sand under him. The sand was different here than it was back home. He didn’t like it, but he did like the shells. He shook his hand and looked out at the bay, his mama had called it. San…San…fran…San Franrisco Bay. Spock nodded. That sounded right in his head.

“Mama, it is time go,” Spock said, standing up in the sand and looking at his mother.

“Yes, we shall go,” his father agreed, standing up as well. He brushed off the sand on him and Spock copied much to his mother’s amusement.

“Alright, alright. I see my Vulcans have had enough of the beach,” she said, standing up as well. “I am going to dip my toes into the water for a moment and then we will go.”

Spock and his father watched Mama walked towards the water. She wasn’t covered up in as she usually was back home. Here, on her planet as she called it, she wore a simple dress. She toed off her sandals and walked a few feet into the water until the water was midcalf.

Spock turned and looked up at his father. “I do not like the water.”

Sarek looked down at his son. “Neither do I but your mother is human.”




Spock and Sarek looked back to their human. A shirtless man was jogging towards their mother.

Who is that? Spock wondered.

“Amanda Grayson?” the man slowed down and came to a stop near Mama.

Amanda looked at the man. “Oh, my goodness! Johnny?”

“Johnny?” Sarek repeated.

Spock looked up to his father. “Naked man, sa-mekh.”

Sarek nodded and started to approach. Spock followed with his short legs. Sarek made it there quicker.

“Can’t believe it’s been eleven years,” Johnny was saying. “You have not changed a bit.”

“Shut up, I have,” Amanda replied with a laugh. “And look at you, you’ve changed from the punk guy I knew back then.”

Seriously, who is this man? Spock wondered.

“Adun’a,” Sarek said, coming to stand next to his wife. He looked at Johnny.

“Johnny, this is Sarek, my husband,” Amanda said. “Sarek, this is Johnny.”

“Nice to meet you, Sarek,” Johnny said. “See you got yourself a Vulcan, Mandy.”

“I did,” Amanda put her arm around Sarek.

“How do you two know each other,” Sarek asked.

“We went to high school together,” Amanda responded.

 What is high school and what is going on here? Spock finally made it over to his parents.

“Went to high school together, yes,” Johnny chuckled. “We also dated. I believe we were high school sweethearts.”

“Yes, we were but then we…Sarek!” Sarek picked up his wife, putting her over his shoulder.

“Mine,” Sarek growled at Johnny.

“Sa-mekh?” Spock questioned.

Johnny glanced to Spock. Sarek growled and picked Spock up by the back of his overalls. “He is mine, too.” He then stalked off with his wife and child in his arms.

“Sarek, are you serious?” Mama fussed. “Johnny and I broke up a decade ago. And I liked those sandals and we need the picnic basket and blanket. Sarek!”

“Mine,” Sarek growled again.

“Mine?” Spock questioned.

“Yes, your mother is mine and you are mine,” Sarek said.

“Sarek, don’t teach him that.”


Fascinating, people can be yours. I should find people that can be mine.

Chapter Text

Age 8

Spock walked around the hall with his parents and was friendly and courteous to the Federation and Starfleet members he was introduced to. A few of the kids he had met had tried to see if he wanted to play. No. He did not play.

His parents walked up to a young blonde woman in a Starfleet dress uniform.

“Commander Kirk,” his father greeted the woman.

“Ambassador Sarek,” she replied. Kirk looked to his mother. “Mrs…Mrs…Sarek?”

“Amanda is fine,” his mother told her with a smile. She extended her hand for a shake which Commander Kirk did. “It is a pleasure to meet you.”

“It is a pleasure to meet you as well. Both of you.” Commander Kirk looked pasted his parents to him. “Hello.”

Spock held his hand up in a Vulcan salute. “Live long and prosper. I am Spock.”

“Amanda, he’s adorable,” Kirk told his mother.

“He is.” His mother put her arm around his shoulders and pulled him to her side. “Spock, this is Commander Winona Kirk.”

Ah, the Kelvin captain’s widow. “Greetings. I am sorry for your loss.”

Winona smiled at him. “Thank you. How old are you, Spock?”

“I am eight point three seven years old.”

“I have an eight-year-old,” she turned and looked off into the crowd then called, “SAM!” Spock blinked at the loudness. A moment later a blonde boy about Spock’s height appeared at Winona’s side. “Sam, this is Spock. Spock, Amanda, Ambassador, this is my oldest son Sam.”

“Hi,” Sam said.

“Hello,” Spock replied as did his parents.

“Sam, why don’t you show Spock where the other kids are.”

“I do not…” Spock tried but his mother shooed him off with Sam. He gave his parents a grumpy look but he went along with the blonde human boy anyway. Sam led him into another room where they were several other kids, of various species loitering around, playing games and stuff. Spock didn’t care for it.

“Do you want to play Uno?”


“Do you like video games?” Sam asked.


“Well…I’m going to go play.” Sam then walked off and joined a group, leaving Spock alone.

“This game is stupid!” Spock heard a child’s voice say. He turned and saw a boy a little shorter than him standing in front of a table.

“It's not, you just don’t know how to play,” another voice chimed in.

“Whatever.” The first child walked away allowing Spock to see a small blonde haired human boy sitting at a table with a chess set.

I like chess. Spock walked over and stood before the boy and the table. The boy looked up and Spock’s heart skipped a beat in his side. Breathtaking bright blue eyes met his.

“Hi! Do you like chess?” the boy asked.

Spock nodded.

“Wanna play? I’m five but I’m really good at playing.”

Spock nodded.

The boy cocked his head to the side. “Can you talk? I don't know how to speak Vulcan if you can't talk.”

Spock nodded.

The boy giggled. “Okay, sit down.”

Spock sat down as the boy set up the board again with white in front of Spock.

“I’m Jim. Jim Kirk.”

“Spock,” Spock finally spoke. Jim. Jim is…cute. I like cute. He must be another of Commander Kirk's sons, the one born on the evacuation shuttle. "I am sorry for your loss."

Jim stared at him. "My loss? We haven't even played yet. Hey! You think you can win, huh?" Jim grinned. "I bet I can win!"

"That was not what I was saying, but alright." Cute. 

“You’re Vulcan," 

“I am. You are human.” Spock made his opening move on the board. 

“Yep!” Jim made his move which caused Spock to raise a brow. 

After only a few moments of playing, Spock quickly realized Jim was a skilled player for a human; for a five-year-old human. Usually it was Spock’s father that was the only worthy opponent he played against. He'd only won against his father twice since he was five and one of those times his mother distracted his father with a kiss at a crucial moment in the game. 

“Do you go to school on Vulcan?” Jim asked.

“I attend the Vulcan Learning Center.”

“What grade are you in? I’m in second grade already. My mommy made them let me skip because I’m too smart to be with the other five-year-olds.”

“Fascinating. I am not in a particular grade. Vulcans do not have grades.”

“That’s cool! Do you play sports? I like baseball. I’m on the coach pitch team. I was on the tee-ball team but I didn’t like that a lot. At school, when we play kickball I’m always the captain because I know the best plays and I like being the boss.”

Jim talks a lot. But it is cute.

“Are you the captain when you play kickball?”

“I have never played kickball.”

Jim’s eyes went a fraction wider. “Really? You can come and play with me at school then! You can be my co-captain. Okay?”

Co-captain? Jim’s co-captain? Okay.

Spock nodded. 

“Check mate!” Jim announced, several minutes later. “I win!”

Spock did not know how Jim had won, but he did not mind. Jim was an illogically, fascinating cute player. “You are an exceptional player.”

“Thank you. My mommy says I’m sometimes too smart for my own good. I don’t understand what that means, but…” Jim finished his thought with a shrug. “Good game, Spock.” Jim held his hand out to Spock.

Oh, he wishes to shake. But I do not touch others…but Jim is cute. Spock slowly extended his hand to Jim’s. Their hands clasped together. A jolt shot up Spock’s hand, arm, into his torso, up into his head, and down to his heart that seemed to stop altogether for a moment.

“Static electricity!” Jim giggled. Jim squeezed their hands together and then tried to pull his away.

“Mine,” Spock said, keeping Jim’s hand in his.

“Mine?” Jim cocked his head to the side and repeated.

Spock nodded. “Yes, you are mine now. Would you like to come with me to Vulcan?”

Jim cocked his head to the other side and then shrugged. “Okie dokie!. I’ve never been to Vulcan, but I like starships and traveling in them and seeing other planets. When will we go?”

Spock stood up, his hand still clasped with Jim. “Now. Let us go.”

“Okay! Let’s go!”

Spock pulled Jim along.

“When we get to Vulcan, I’ll send my mommy a postcard.”

“That is logical.”

When they were almost to the exit of the fancy hall, Spock’s parents appeared. His father eyed their hands together while his mother looked amused.

“Spock, who is this?” she asked.

“I’m Jim. Jim Kirk. Spock says I’m his now and we’re going to Vulcan. I heard its hot there. I may need my inhaler.”

Amanda stared at them before looking at her husband.

Sarek moved forward with a shake of his head. “No.” He picked Spock up, causing the boys hands to release. He turned on his heel and carried Spock away.

“No, Jim is mine,” Spock fussed, making grabby hands back at the blonde boy as his mother led Jim back to his own mother.


When they were back at their residence in the embassy, his parents sighed at the state of their son.

“Spock, you have to get off the floor,” Amanda said.

“No,” came Spock’s muffled reply as he laid facedown like a plank on the floor. A Vulcan equivalent of a tantrum for the eight-year-old.

“Spock, you are acting illogical,” Sarek said. “Get up or I will pick you up again.”

“I want my Jim.”

Amanda shook her head. “Sweetheart, you are eight. Jim is five. He is not yours. You have T’Pring.”

“No, she is Stonn’s. I want my Jim.”

“When the time is right, you will meet Jim again,” Sarek spoke. “Now is not the time. You are too young. He is not yours.”

“Mine,” Spock mumbled into the carpet.

Amanda looked at her husband. “He gets this from you.”

Sarek looked back at her and arched a brow. “Pardon?”

“How many times a week do you usher me away from others, growling ‘mine’?”

Sarek blinked. “This is not about me.”

Amanda stood up. “Monkey see, monkey do.”

“I am not a monkey,” Sarek countered.

Amanda chuckled. "Fine. Kitten see, kitten do.”

"You are illogical."

"But you love me," she countered. She walked away, stepping over Spock as she went. “Spock, if you want to lay on the floor all night, fine, but no aquarium tomorrow if you do. Goodnight, boys.”

Sarek took a seat nearby and took out his comm to read his messages as he waited for his son to get up. After an hour, Spock hadn’t moved. Sarek looked up from his comm to his son and huffed illogically. “Spock, it is time to get up.”


Sarek shook his head. I suppose he does get this from me.


Chapter Text

Age 12

Spock knelt down beside his skill dome and put his PADD into his pack. School had been satisfactory that day and he had completed all his modules with high marks. He heard footsteps behind him and internally sighed. Not this again.

He stood up and turned to see Stonn and his friends standing there.  Spock had tried to be civil with them over the years but they instead chose to verbally taunt him for being half Human. Well, Stonn taunted, the others were goons who just went along with whatever Stonn did, as his mother liked to tell him.

“Do you have something you wish to say today?” Spock asked. “Yesterday you pointed out that I was one point four inches shorter than the average Vulcan male my age. After consulting with my father, he informed me that he was the same height as I am at this age. He then reached teen years and had a growth spurt which I will no doubt have as well.”

Stonn took a step closer to him. “You are not fully Vulcan.”

Spock put his hands behind his back and clenched his fists. “Yes, I am aware. You also informed me of this one point two weeks ago and two days before that and four days before that. It is getting tiresome having my genetics pointed out.”

The group stared at him.

“Have you prepared new insults for today?” Spock questioned. “Because if it is merely the same insults then I have somewhere else to be.” Spock tried to walk past but the group moved to block his path.

“Your father is a traitor, for marrying the human that birthed you. Your father was merely supposed to be an ambassador of Vulcan on Terra. Not breed with a Terran.”

“My parent’s relationship is none of your concern,” Spock said tersely.

“You are not Vulcan. You are not human.  Therefore, you have no place in the universe.”

“Look at his eyes,” one of Stonn’s friends said. “They are human and sad.”

“Merely a half-breed,” Stonn said.

Spock blinked and clenched his fists behind his back. “This is your thirty-fifth attempt to elicit an emotional response from me. Logic dictates you would cease by now and leave me alone.”

Stonn took a step closer, invading Spock’s personal space. “Perhaps an emotional response requires physical stimuli.”

Stonn pushed Spock back. Spock stumbled but stayed upright. He narrowed his eyes at the group.

“Your father is a traitor.”

This is getting old. And repetitive. Spock turned and started to walk away.

“He should not have married your whore of a mother. How many men does she bed in a week?”

Spock stopped and turned back to Stonn. Before the other Vulcan could utter another word, Spock lunged at him.


Spock looked up from the bench he sat on and watched his parents come out of the headmaster’s office down the corridor. His mother looked at him and smiled before looking up to his father.

“Restrictions should be put in place,” Spock heard his father say. “Engaging in a physical altercation is not acceptable nor logical.”

His mother scoffed. “I am not punishing him for standing up for himself. If someone hits you, you defend yourself.”

“He was not struck first.”

“Well…they tease him. Everyday, Sarek. Spock should defend himself from those bullies.”

“Spock had no reasonable expectation of being physically injured. Words cannot hurt you. Logical and reason should have guided his actions.”

“Words cannot hurt you?” his mother repeated.


His mother scoffed again. “Maybe they don’t hurt Vulcans, but they sure do hurt humans. Especially young ones like Spock. Sarek, you know I want him to embrace Vulcan, but Spock also needs to be himself which is occasionally being human.”

“His humanity is the source of his ostracism, Amanda.”

Spock watched his mother point a finger in his father’s face. He could see her face get red and her eyes narrow. She opened her mouth, shut it and then opened it again. “I am taking Spock and going home now before I say something I am going to regret.” She yelled down to Spock. “Spock, let’s go!”

Spock stood and headed over to his parents.

“I wish to have words with Spock,” his father said.

“Not right now,” his mother replied. “You can talk to him later.”

“I would like to say something to father,” Spock spoke.

His parents eyed him.

“In private, Mother.”

His mother nodded. “I will be outside by the car.”


His mother then shot his father a look then left. Spock turned to his father. “I did not mean to cause conflict between you and mother.”

Sarek looked down at him. His eyes soft. “You did not. Your mother is…she loves you dearly and only wants what is best for you.”

“And you do…not?” Spock questioned.

“No, Spock, I do as well.”

“But you wished to punish me for sticking up for myself, for defending mother.”

Sarek raised a brow. “Defending mother?”

Spock nodded. “I do not mind their taunts, their illogical insults towards me, but this time they referred to mother…they called her a whore and implied she beds many men. That is something I cannot tolerate. She is my mother and will not be disrespected.”

“They called her…” Sarek looked away and a low growl rumbled in his chest. “Go home with you mother. We will talk later.”


Sarek turned and walked away.


“My kan-bu,” his mother cooed when they were at home. Spock laid on the couch with his head in his mother’s lap as she gently petted his hair. “I’m sorry those boys are so mean to you.”

“What is is.”

“I hope you decked them good.”


“What? They deserved it for picking on my baby. I have half a mind to go to their parents and give them an earful.”

“An earful of what?”

His mother leaned over and kissed his cheek. “Nothing, sweetie. Do you need an icepack?”

“No, it is merely a bruise. Thank you, though.”

“Thanks are illogical.”

Spock resisted smiling. How could anyone say bad things about his mother. She was perfect and his.

They heard the front door open and then close. Footsteps grew closer and soon Sarek stood in the doorway to the sitting room. Spock and Amanda looked at him.

“Sarek? Why do you have a split lip?” his mother questioned.

“No reason,” Sarek replied. He walked over and sat next to her on the couch. He put an arm around her. “My wife.”

“Sarek, what did you do?”

“I…apologize for my earlier words.”

“What did you do?” his mother asked again.

“Taluhk nash-veh k'dular, ashal-veh,” his father replied simply.

“Yes, mother, we cherish you,” Spock added.

“Something has happened and I know you two are keeping something from me.”

“No,” they both said.

Amanda shook her head and stood up, causing Spock to quickly sit up or else end up on the floor. “Well then since you two won’t tell me what has happened, I am not making dinner tonight.”

“But mama I am injured,” Spock said softly.

“As am I, adun’a.”

“On your own for dinner, boys,” she said again before leaving the room.

Spock looked at his father. “I want soup.”

His father raised a brow at him. “You are old enough to make soup yourself.”

“But I am injured.”

“As am I.”

They stared at one another.

“You went to Stonn’s didn’t you?” Spock asked.

Sarek stood up. “I shall go make us soup.”

Chapter Text

Age 16

Spock looked around the banquet hall and tried to find a blonde boy with striking blue eyes but had no luck. He been to several of these Federation events since he was eight and each time he always looked for Jim but never found him. He wanted to see Jim again.

A hand touched his shoulder. He turned his head and found his mother standing beside him. She looked lovely in her formal dress. “There is a kids room across the hall.”

“I am aware.”

“I saw a group playing 3D chess.”


He heard his mother chuckle. “Spock, why don’t you go and see if you can play?”

“I do not…”

She gently tugged at his ear. “Spock, go play.”

He fixed his mother with a grumpy looked before leaving the banquet hall. He entered the kids room and discovered he was among only a handful of teenagers, the rest were younger kids being corralled by ‘babysitters’.

This is illogical, he thought.

“Chaos, right?” a voiced asked.

Spock looked beside him and found a blonde teen girl, a few inches shorter than him, standing there in a formal dress.

“Chaos, indeed,” Spock agreed.

“They need a separate room for us teens.”

“That would be beneficial.”

She smiled at him. “I’m Leila. Leila Kalomi.”


“Nice to meet you, Spock.”


“I saw you in here earlier. You were looking for someone.”

“They are not here.”

“I’m sorry to hear that. Girlfriend?”

Spock shook his head. “No.” My t’hy’la.

Leila’s smile got bigger. “I’m glad to hear that.”

Spock raised a brow and didn’t respond.

“Do you want to play any games?” she asked.

Spock glanced behind him to the exit. His mother told him to come in here and play. It was quite boring with the adults. He nodded at Leila. “Can you play 3D chess?”

“Yes, I’m awesome at it.”



An hour later, Spock was about to forfeit the game just to get Leila to stop talking. She talked and talked and hardly made a move until Spock pointed out it was her turn. She would then make a move, Spock would counter, and then she’d start talking and talking again.

“Right now, my parents are with a delegation from Earth trying to get research grants for botany expeditions to other planets.”

Spock nodded.

“I plan to be a botanist too.”

Spock nodded.

“I just love flowers. Don’t you?”

“My mother has a garden on Vulcan.”

“I bet it’s lovely.”

“Indeed. It is your turn.”

“Oh, right.” She stared at the board then knocked over her king. “You win.”

Thank Surak it is over. Spock stood up. “It was pleasant to meet you Miss Kalomi but I…”

She stood up and grabbed his arm. “Let’s dance.”

Spock blinked. “I do not…”

“C’mon, I think it’s a slow song playing.”

“I do not…” Spock tried but she pulled him along. They left the kids room and went back into the banquet hall. A slow song was playing as she led him onto the dance floor and released his arm. He tried to turn to leave but she stepped into his personal space and put her arms around his neck.

What is happening? Why is she touching me? Spock held his hands at his sides as she started to sway. He stay perfectly still.

“You are such a good dancer.”

Spock nodded.

“I like your robe.”

Spock nodded.

She stepped closer and seemed to hug him, resting her head under his chin.

I do not like this. I do not like this. Not mine. Not mine. Not mine.

“You smell nice.”

Leave! Abort! Find father and mother and leave!

She lifted her head and batted her eyes up at him. “You know what would make this night extra magical, Spock?”


“No,” he finally spoke.

She grinned and then closed her eyes.

Oh Surak, no, Spock thought as Leila puckered her lips and leaned up closer to him. Spock quickly moved a way at that. “I must…my father…good evening.” He turned and rushed off the dance floor and into the crowd.

“Spock! Spock come back and dance!” She followed.

Why is she following me? Spock ducked behind a large Grazerite who gave him an odd look. Spock apologized then saw Leila drawing nearer.

“Spock, hey, let’s go find the garden in the back…Spock!”

 Spock darted through the crowd of Federation officials before coming to a banquet table. He looked around then ducked down and hid under the table, thankful the tablecloth reached the floor.

“Oh Spock,” he heard her nearby. “Darnit, where did he go?”

Spock waited and waited and when he was sure the coast was clear he crawled out from underneath the table and came upon a familiar pair of shoes. His gaze slowly raised up to find his father standing before him. One of Sarek’s slanted brows were raised up and is head was cocked to the side.

“Sa-mekh,” Spock said. He stood up and smoothed down his formal robe.


“I would rather not.”

“Spock! There you are!” Leila suddenly said.

Spock’s eyes widened. He quickly moved to stand behind his father. Sarek glanced to him, still with a raised brow.

“Hello, Sir,” Leila spoke to his father. “Spock and I were just hanging out.”

“I see,” Sarek said.

Spock poked his father in the side a few times. Sarek gave him a look then continued speaking to Leila, “But now, Spock must stay with his mother and I. He cannot hang out anymore.”

Spock didn’t look at Leila’s face, but he was sure she was upset. He heard a sniffle and then an ‘okay’ from the girl before footsteps departed. Spock stepped away from his father who turned around and faced him.


“I would rather not. Thank you.”

Sarek shook his head. “Your mother was amused to see you dancing with Leila."

Oh Surak."It was not an amusing situation."

“Apparently so. Go join your mother. She is at the table with a Captain Pike who you may find agreeable to talk to.”

Spock nodded and walked away. Leila was illogical. Dancing was illogical. Dancing and kissing were only logical with one’s mate which Leila is not. She is not mine. Jim. Jim is mine, but, where is he? 

Chapter Text

Age 21 Part One

Spock stood outside the large double doors and waited. As he waited he picked at the hem of his handmade sweater.

“Spock, don’t be nervous,” his mother told him from where she stood several feet away.

He was not nervous. Nervousness was illogical. He knew he had been accepted into the VSA, his father had already informed him of such the previous evening. This meeting with admissions council was just a formality so he was not nervous. Nope.

“I am not nervous,” he told his mother as he continued to pick at his sweater.

“Sweetie, come here.”





“Spock Harold.”

Spock looked up. She only used Harold when she really wanted him to do something…or when he was in trouble. Her arms were outstretched towards him. He internally sighed and walked over to her.

“Don’t be anxious then,” she said when he was close enough. She reached up and fiddled with his collar. “You know you’re going to do fine.”

“I am not anxious and fine has variable definitions,” Spock replied.

She smiled up at him and rested her hands on his cheeks. He felt her love for him through their contact. It was warm and soft and he couldn’t help but close his eyes and relish in it. “You are so handsome, kan-bu.”

Spock opened his eyes. “I am not…”

“You’ll always be my baby.”

Spock couldn’t help but nod in response. His mother gently pulled his head down. She raised up on her tiptoes and kissed his forehead before releasing him.

“I’m so proud of you. Of all you’ve accomplished and will accomplish.”

“Thank you, mother.”

“But you have yet to tell me if you are accepting the VSA’s admission or Starfleet’s.”

“I have weighed the merits of both and remain undecided at the moment, mother.”

She chuckled. “Spock, you’re still undecided? You are about to walk into the admissions council and accept a position at the VSA.”

“I am aware, but I am still undecided.”

The large double doors opened. “S'chn T'gai Spock.”

His mother touched his collar again, smoothing it down. “Good luck.”

“Luck is…”

She gently pinched his cheek. “Thank you, mother.”

“I’ll see you and your father at home. I’ll make your favorite for dinner to celebrate.”

“S'chn T'gai Spock,” his name was called again.

Spock nodded and walked away from his mother and into the room. Spock stood before the looming admissions council seated high above him in the room.

“You have surpassed the expectations of your instructors,” the science minister, Tolek, started talking. Spock looked to the older Vulcan in the middle of the group. His father sat two from him on the left. “Your final record is flawless. With one exception.”

One expectation? Excuse me? Spock thought, internally annoyed that they found an expectation to his flawless record. Either his record was flawless or it was not.

“I see you have applied to Starfleet as well,” the Vulcan continued.

Oh. That. Well that is definitely not an exception to my flawlessness. “It was logical to cultivate multiple options,” Spock replied.

“Logical but unnecessary. You are hereby accepted to the Vulcan Science Academy. A distinction all the more significant given that you will be its first half-Vulcan pupil.”

Spock narrowed his eyes at Tolek. Non-Vulcans and others of mixed heritage have been attending the Academy for years. Why was he making a point that he is half-Vulcan?

“It is truly remarkable, Spock. That you have achieved so much despite your disadvantage. Welcome to the Academy.”

Disadvantage? What disadvantage? My humanity? I do not think so. He looked to his father and quirked up a brow. His father merely shook his head.

The council started to rise, but Spock remained where he stood. He had to press the counselor’s comment. “If you would clarify, Minister—what disadvantage are you referring to?”

Do not say it. Do not…

“Your human mother.”

Spock clenched his fists. My mother, he internally growled. He looked to his father again.

“Minister Tolek,” his father finally spoke. “Do not refer to my mate as a disadvantage. She is not and Spock’s humanity is no disadvantage either. You said so yourself, his record is flawless—he had the highest marks on all his final exams and on the admissions test to the academy. How could one accomplish that if they had a disadvantage?”

Tolek stared at his father before looking down at Spock. “My apologies for my error in words, Spock.” He looked at Sarek. “Sarek.”

After that, it was time to depart from the hall. Spock found his father outside the room. “Mother went home.”

“I am aware. I must collect a few things from my office. Wait here and we will depart shortly.”

Spock nodded. Sarek patted him on the shoulder. “Welcome to the VSA.”

“Thank you.”

Sarek turned and walked away. Spock stood and waited. After a moment he heard footsteps around the opposite corner.

“You apologized for speaking the truth,” he heard someone say.

“It is what they wanted to hear.” Spock recognized the second voice as Tolek’s. Spock quirked a brow and walked closer to the corner.

“Sarek is fond of his human and half-human. His experiments,” Tolek continued.

Spock clenched his fists. He was not an experiment and neither was his mother.

“Sarek requested the ambassadorship to Terra all those years ago, did he not?” another asked.

Spock peered around the corner. “He did,” Tolek said. “Humans are quite illogical but Sarek seems quite interested in them which is causing his own logic and reasoning to diminish. He is not like he was before he married that human.”

That human? How dare he.

“No, it seems he is not like himself,” another council member spoke. “Considering how his first born rejected his logical upbringing and chose to embrace emotion like his ancestors, perhaps something is wrong with the House of Surak.”

My father and my house should not be disrespected in such a way! Spock growled and stepped into the hallway. The council members looked as surprised as Vulcans could at seeing the young Vulcan there. Spock glared at them.

“Council members, I have a few things I wish to say to you. Firstly, my father is a great Vulcan. His logic and reasoning are sound, more sound than any of yours. My father embraces IDIC which you all do not apparently. Secondly, it is completely illogical and in bad taste to stand here, in public, and openly defame my father for merely standing up for his family. And thirdly, fuck you.”

Their eyes widened at Spock’s language.

“Spock, you are…”

“I am rejecting the offer to attend the VSA,” Spock interrupted Tolek.

“No Vulcan has ever declined admission to this academy,” Tolek spoke.

“Then as I am half-Vulcan, as you and others seem keen on pointing out, your record remains untarnished. I feel I would not benefit from studying here nor would I find acceptance.” Spock held his hand up in a Vulcan salute to them. “Live long and prosper.” He then changed the positioning of his fingers and present them with his middle one before he turned on his heel and walked away.

Spock turned a corner and stopped in his tracks. His father stood there, blank faced. Spock blinked a few times. “Father, I…”

“I heard,” Sarek spoke.




Sarek walked around him and Spock followed. He followed his father back to the corridor where Spock had just told off the council members. The Vulcans still stood there.

“My colleagues,” Sarek began. “I heard what my son said.”

“And what do you plan to do about it, Sarek?” Tolek asked. “He is emotional.”

“Emotion runs deep within our race. I actually would be surprised if he did not become emotional at what he had heard you say about me. He, like the rest of the House of Surak, hold family in the highest regard. You insulted his family and he reacted logically.

My son is a child of two worlds. The best of both of them actually. He has acted and behaved like any logical Vulcan his whole life, but, as he is part Human, he is allowed to act illogically at times especially when it involves his family. Where is the logic in the words you were speaking about me behind my back?”

Sarek’s colleagues looked at one another.

Tolek spoke, “He has rejected his admission to the VSA.”

Spock mentally shook his head. Were these Vulcans unable to admit their lapse in logic for insulting his father?

Sarek nodded. “I heard that as well. Spock is fully capable of choosing his own destiny. He has chosen a path that will allow him to achieve acceptance that he will not find here. My son is destined for greatness; greatness that will have no association with the VSA.”

The colleagues remained silent.

“A pity that you threw this chance away because you feel he is disadvantaged because of my wife, his mother,” Sarek continued. “I wonder how my mother, T’Pau, will react when I inform her of today’s events.”

That caused the council member’s eyes to widen.

Spock internally grinned. “Grandmother appointed a few of you to this council, did she not?” His grandmother held a lot of weight on Vulcan. She was the head of their house, one of the most logical minds among Vulcans and could be ruthless in the application of her logic. The poor council members.

Tolek actually looked a little frazzled. “There…there is no need to inform Minister T’Pau of today’s events. I…we all apologize for our words.”

“Yes, we all apologize,” the council members said.

“Apologies are illogical,” Sarek said. “You spoke your mind and you are only sorry now because of my threat to inform my mother.” Sarek turned to Spock. “It is time to leave now. Your mother is waiting and we have much to tell her.”

Spock nodded and then left with his sa-mekh. When they were outside the VSA his father said, "It would be best not to inform your mother what has transpired."

"Agreed. I shall tell her, after weighing my options, Starfleet was the logical choice."


Chapter Text

Age 21 Part 2

Spock stared at the large dormitory building in front of him. After debating and making pro and con lists, he decided to try living with a dormmate at Starfleet Academy. His mother had spoken highly of her college years living in the dormitory and making friends with individuals on her floor. Spock felt it was time to be social able. After all he was twenty-one. He was due to make a few friends.

“Are you sure you don’t want us coming in with you?” his mother asked.

Spock turned around and faced his parents. They stood a few feet away by their hovercar. “No, mother. I am an adult and can get situated in the dorm by myself.”

“If you’re sure.”

"I am. Thank you both for bringing me here. I shall join you tomorrow after new cadet orientation.”

“That is agreeable,” his father spoke. “Have a good first day on campus.”

His mother walked up to him and he allowed her to hug him. “Yes, be a good boy and make lots of new friends.”

“Mother,” Spock sighed. He hugged her back and offered his father a Vulcan salute instead of a hug but was hugged by his father anyway. Spock hugged him back before he gathered up his luggage and headed towards his new residence.


Spock checked in with the residence assistants and was pointed in the right direction of his dorm. He found it with no trouble and entered. It was a modest size room with two twin size beds, a shared backroom, two desks and dressers, and a small kitchenette.

“Acceptable,” Spock said. He walked over to the closest bed and put his stuff on it. “This is mine.” He then quickly claimed the desk and dresser he wanted as well as a small corner he could use for meditation.

Spock took the time to unpack and neatly put his belongings away. He then took a seat at the desk and read through his welcome packet. Tomorrow would be busy—he had new cadet orientation, uniform acquisition, and a few placement exams. He would have to notify his parents that he would be available late tomorrow.

He heard the swishing of the door opening and turned to find a man of Asian origin entering the room. He looked about Spock’s age. The man smiled at Spock.

“Hey, I’m Hikaru. Hikaru Sulu.”

Spock stood up and offered him the Vulcan salute. “Greetings. I am Spock.”

“Nice to meet you Spock.” Sulu walked over to the first bed, Spocks bed, and dropped a bag on it.

Spock eyed it before saying, “That is my bed.”

Sulu blinked and looked at the bed. He then looked around the room before smiling at Spock. “I see you’ve made yourself home.”

“It was logical.” Spock eyed the bag on his bed again.

Sulu picked it up and moved over to the second bed a few feet away. “That’s fine. Bed by the window is good.”

Spock nodded. He sat back down and watched Sulu put his stuff away. After a while the man’s comm started buzzing. Sulu got a funny look on his face as he looked at his communication device.

“Are you well?” Spock asked.

Spock laughed. “Yeah, I’m good. My boyfriend Ben just messaged me. He goes to Berkley. He may come by later if that’s alright.”


“Great. I’ll put a sock out on the door.”

Spock furrowed his brows together and wanted to ask ‘why’ but Sulu was already looking back at his phone, smiling and no doubt messaging his boyfriend. Spock let the sock thing go. After a few moments, Sulu put his comm down.

“Mr. Sulu, what…”

“Hikaru is fine.”

Fine has variable definitions, Spock thought. “Hikaru, what division are you enrolling into?”

“Sciences first and then I’ll dabble a bit in the Command track. I have a degree in astrophysics.” Hikaru sat down on Spock’s bed so they could face one another and talk. "I’ll be working on my PhD in it while I’m here, but I also hope to be a helmsman as well. What about you?”

“The sciences as well. I plan to work on a few degrees while I am here, too.”

“Are you from Vulcan?”

Spock quirked a brow. “Yes.”

“I’ve been there once. To Raal for a family vacation when I was a kid.”

“Raal is a pleasant coastal city. I have been there a few times with my parents. I grew up in the ShiKahr area.”

“I’m from here. Born and raised in San Francisco.”

The two new roommates stared at one another in silence for a few moments. Spock was not used to socializing with people his own age.

“Do you read?” Spock tried. He enjoyed books, even the illogical ones his mother suggested. Alice in Wonderland was a favorite.

Sulu chuckled. “Yeah, I read. Kind of have to in order to get this far academically.”

“Yes, indeed, that is true. I meant…”

“You meant for fun,” Sulu interrupted. “I was just joshing you.”

“I am Spock.”

“I read when I get the chance. Mostly science journals or horticulture books.”

“Horticulture? You enjoy the science and art of growing plants.”

“That is what horticulture is and yes I do. Always have loved plants.” Sulu looked around. “There may be a few spots I’d love to put a plant or two.” Sulu looked back to Spock. “If you do not mind?”

“Not at all. There are numerous benefits of interior plants.”

“I think we’ll get along nicely these next few years, Spock.”

“As do I.”

“We should go to the dorm mixer later this evening. Heard its going to be fun and you can meet some more people in the science track.”

“That sounds agreeable.”

Sulu smiled and nodded. He stood up and went over to the kitchenette. Spock turned away to read but couldn’t help but look back when Sulu stared swearing under his breath and smacking at the beverage machine.

Spock raised a brow. “Problem?”

Sulu sighed. “Damn thing is broken I think. They said everything was brand new.”

Spock looked at the item. “Have you turned it on?”

Sulu pressed a few buttons. “It won’t turn on.”

“Is it plugged in?”

Sulu looked at Spock and then behind the machine. Sulu went quiet as the sound of the machine coming to life filled the kitchenette area.

“It was not plug…”

“Yeah, I got it, Spock,” Sulu replied. “Thanks.”

He does not sound thankful, Spock thought. He does seem like he'd be a good friend though. Spock went back to his welcome packet reading.


Later that evening, Spock stood stiffly in the corner of a room down the hall. The place was filled with new cadets of all genders and species. Spock had introduced himself to several and found a few that would be in the sciences with him. They seemed pleasant enough.

A cadet approached and offered him a red cup filled with a colorful liquid. It smelled alcoholic. Spock declined and the cadet moved on.

When the music in the room started to get louder, Spock decided to head back to his dorm. He had tried to find Sulu and his boyfriend but they were no where to be found. Spock walked down the hall and stopped at his room. A sock was laid on top of the door’s control panel. He raised a brow at it before glancing around and see a few other doors had socks on their control panels.

Curious, Spock thought. He picked up the sock and entered his room. He immediately heard strange sounds in the dimly lit room. He ordered the lights brighter and found an eyeful in front of him.

“That is my bed!” Spock fussed.


Amanda sipped her chamomile tea as she and Sarek sat in the den at their embassy residence.

“I miss our baby,” she said after a few moments.

Sarek looked up from the science journal he was reading. “Amanda, Spock is not a baby. He is twenty-one.”

She gave her husband a look. He blinked before nodding. “Yes, I miss our baby as well, but he needs to leave the nest as they say.”

“I know, I know. He needs to start his life now.”

“Affirmative.” Sarek looked back to the journal only to look up again a moment later when a door slammed down the hall. He and Amanda turned towards the entrance way of the room as Spock appeared with his luggage.


“Roommates are illogical,” Spock said. “Tomorrow, after I finish at Starfleet, we will find myself a new residence where I will live alone and where no one will fornicate on my bed.” Spock then walked away.

Amanda and Sarek exchanged a look. Amanda couldn’t help but chuckle. “I guess we won’t be getting grandchildren then.”

Sarek arched a brow. “Why do you say that?”

Amanda blinked. “Because…never mind, I’m not explaining it to you.” She shook her head and went back to her tea. Sarek stared at her for a beat before going back to his journal.

Spock reappeared again. “Mother, what is the purpose of a sock outside a door?”

Amanda grinned. “Oh honey, did your roommate have a sock out?”


“Sweetie, it means don’t enter because your roommate is…well…fornicating on your bed.”

Spock’s nostrils flared. “That is illogical and should be warned about in the welcome packet.”  Spock turned on his heel and left again.

“Amanda?” Sarek asked.

“Yes, dear?”

“How often did you leave socks outside your dorm in college?”

Amanda smiled. “Only when Johnny came to visit.”

Sarek growled in response.

Chapter Text

Age 26

“And with that,” Captain Pike sighed as the ship docked at the starbase, “we are grounded until the Enterprise is complete.”

Spock nodded and proceeded to do his end of shift shut down of his terminal. He transferred all important information to his personal files before standing up. He had enjoyed the past several months on assignment under Captain Pike. He had learned a lot and was looking forward to the next phase in his career. 

“You start teaching next week, right, Lieutenant Commander?” Pike asked Spock.

Spock turned to his captain. “Yes, Sir. I will also be taking over the programming of the Kobayashi Maru.”

“Good luck with both.” Pike clapped him on the shoulder. “It’s been…interesting serving with you, Spock. Looking forward to you as my first officer in two years.”

“As do I, Captain.”


Spock looked up from his PADD at the sound of someone requesting entrance into his office. He granted it, pressing a button on his desk that opened the door.

“Cadet Uhura, how I can I help you?” Spock asked as the cadet entered his office.

In the few weeks Spock had been her professor, she had proved to be quite a capable and advanced linguist. He wished he had a whole class of Uhuras.

“I had a few questions on the latest assignment, Sir.”

Spock motioned for her to take a seat in front of his desk. “What are your questions?”

Uhura smiled at him and began talking.


Three Months Later

“…and Nyota also helped me with a project in the long ranger sensor lab. She has proven to be a most valuable asset these past few months,” Spock finished recapping his week to his mother.

Amanda smiled on the screen. “Sweetie, you’ve talked about Nyota a lot these past few months.”

Spock blinked. “She is my student and my TA. It is necessary to talk about her when you ask how my classes and projects are going.”

She chuckled. “Yes, I know, dear, but…you also spend time together outside of Starfleet duties.”

“Yes, we do. Nyota enjoys chess so we play chess together while discussing Starfleet matters as well.”

“You also mentioned playing the lyre with her and how she has a pleasing singing voice.”

Spock arched a brow. “Mother, it seems you have something you wish to say. Please say it and stop ‘beating around the bush’.”

His mother chuckled again. “Its seems that she is also, among being your student and TA, your friend.”

My friend? Spock looked away and quickly went through all his interactions with Uhura since he first started teaching her.





Spock looked back to his mother. “Two point one months ago she stated that I could call her Nyota instead of Cadet Uhura.”

“Because you two are friends. Friends use first names.”

“I see. She also informs me of your family matters. Her parents have been married twenty-nine years. Her older sister will be getting married next Spring and her younger brother was just accepted into Oxford.”

“Friends also talk about that as well.”

“She also likes translating old books into different languages. Currently she is working through the Hobbit and translating it into Klingon—she expects it will be another year before she is done.”

His mother smiled bigger. “Sweetheart, you have a friend.”

“I have a friend,” Spock repeated. “I have never had a friend before.” Sulu and I have only spoken four times since we parted as roommates. I would say I am…acquainted with many of my coworkers but…they are not friends. But, Captain Pike. “No, Captain Pike is my friend. I think.”

“I think he is your friend too but Uhura is a different kind of friend. A more personal one. Do you know a lot about Pike?”

“He prefers his coffee black and he enjoys chess.”

“Where is he from?”





“Unknown,” Spock said again. He did know a lot about Pike but it was more of a professional friendship, different than his relationship with Uhura. “I have a friend,” Spock said again. “My first…real friend.”

“I know. I’m glad you finally have one.”

“Me too, mother.”


The next day, Spock sat with Uhura on a bench outside the science building on campus.

He glanced at her. She was staring at the PADD in her lap going over a calculation for Spock’s project.

“Nyota,” Spock said even though they were in their respective Starfleet uniforms.

She looked up and met his eyes. “Yes?”

“Are we…friends?”

Uhura cocked her head to the side quizzically. “Um…yes. I think so…well I had thought so. Why?”

“It was only made aware to me last night that we are friends.”

“You realized we were friends…last night?”

Spock nodded. “My mother informed me.”

Uhura laughed.

Spock tried not to smile but a small one pulled at the corner of his mouth. “Yes, it was amusing, I suppose.”

“You are just too cute, Spock.”

Spock nodded in agreement but then realized she had just called him cute. Do friends do that?

“I mean…well…” Uhura’s face was a little red now. “You are cute. I just…look, I’m going to take this shot and if I’m out of line then we can move on, okay?”

“Take a shot?”

“I like you. Like you like you. Um…we could…be more than…friends?”

“More than friends? I do not under…” Oh…more than friends. Significant others. Oh no. Spock looked away and shook his head. “Nyota, I…”

She shook her head. “I understand, it was…I have a crush on you and now I know it’s not reciprocated we can move on. I like being friends with you, Spock.”

“I like being friends with you as well, Nyota,” Spock replied. He looked back to her. “I apologize for not having a crush on you as well, but I have a…a…t’hy’la.”

“A t’hy’la?”

Spock nodded. He knew she understand the meaning of the word. She was fluent in Vulcan, among other languages. “He and I are destined to meet again. Someday. Someday soon, I hope.”

She smiled at him. “I’m glad you have a t’hy’la, Spock.”

“I am certain you have a mate out there as well that you will have more than just a crush on.”

Uhura chuckled. “I hope so too.”

“I am flattered, though, that you have a crush on me. I have never had someone like me…no, wait, I have. I was sixteen and she…” Spock resisted shuddering at remembering Leila. “She was predatory almost. I did not enjoy being the object of her crush.”

“I can’t imagine you would if she was acted predatory.” She touched his arm.

“Are we still friends?” Spock asked.

“Yes, Spock, we are.”

My friend Nyota, Spock thought. I like it.


Two Months Later

Spock looked up from the teashops menu as the door to the shop opened. He gave a small wave at Uhura, who had just entered. She waved back and headed over to him.

“I’m sorry I am late,” She said as she sat down across from him. “Had a little run in with another cadet.”


“He’s…I don’t know…not a jerk, but…we didn’t get off onto the right foot when we first met. I thought he was just a dumb hick.”

“And he is not?”

“No. He’s surprisingly a genius. Top of all his classes. Can best me in a few linguistic challenges in the club and loves hitting on me.”

Hitting on her? Someone is hitting my friend? How dare there? “What is this cadet’s name? If he is striking you, then he must be…”

“No, Spock,” Uhura told him. She chuckled. “Hitting on me doesn’t mean actually physically hitting me, Spock. It means flirting. Kirk flirts. Not just with me but with a lot of others. He’s very friendly.”

Kirk? Spock didn’t want to hope. “Nyota, this Cadet…Kirk…would his first name happen to be…Jim?”

“Jim Kirk? Yes, that’s his name. Do you know him?”

“I might,” Spock said. His heart was starting to beat faster in his side. “And would this Jim Kirk also have breathtaking blue eyes?”

Uhura furrowed her brows together. “Breathtaking? I mean I wouldn’t call them breathtaking but they are bright blue.”

My Jim! And his eyes are breathtaking! Be calm, Spock. Maintain composure. “I see,” Spock said slowly. “Nyota, do you know where my Jim is now?”

“Your Jim?”

“My apologies, that came out wrong. I meant to say, do you know where my Jim is?”

“Spock, what is going on? Do you know Kirk?”

Spock nodded. “Long story.” He stood up and pushed his chair in. “Where was he last?”

“Library, second floor.”

“Thank you. I will contact you later to reschedule our lunch date. Goodbye.” Spock then quickly walked out of the tea shop and hightailed it back to Starfleet and to the library.

Chapter Text

Age 26 Part 2

Spock walked quickly into the library and took the stairs two at a time up to the second floor. He roamed through the stacks, looking for a blonde cadet. He found a couple, but they were not his Jim. From the stacks he moved on to the study rooms, searching one by one until he came to the last one at the far end of the floor.

Spock peaked inside. His heart fluttered. Standing there in front of the room’s table, was a blonde haired human male with his back to Spock.

Jim, Spock hoped. He opened the door and stepped inside, letting the door close behind him. “Jim.”

The cadet slowly turned around. Spock stopped just inside the room and stared. This was his Jim.

His Jim was clearly not five anymore but was still cute. Very cute. Handsome, adorable, perfect, las’hark.

Jim’s eyes were still the bright sapphires that he remembered. And Nyota does not think they are breathtaking. Illogical.

“Yeah?” Jim asked. Jim’s eyes narrowed slightly and his brows furrowed together. “Hey, don’t I know you?”

He remembers me! Spock nodded.

Jim stepped closer. “Yes, I do know you.” He pointed at Spock. “You’re the Vulcan kid that tried to kidnap me when I was five.”

Spock nodded but then shook his head and quickly said, “No, I was not attempting to kidnap you.”

A smile tugged at Jim’s pink lips. “Oh, you weren’t? Because I clearly remember you grabbing my hand.” Jim stood at arm’s length from Spock and grabbed Spock’s left hand. A jolt, just like before, shot up Spock’s hand, arm, into his torso, up into his head, and down to his heart that seemed to stop altogether for a moment.

“And saying ‘you are mine now’ and ‘would you like to come with me to Vulcan’.”  Jim licked his lips and looked down at their hands clasped together. Spock could feel Jim’s excitement to see him again, but also his hesitancy, and even confusion. “And the static electricity.” Jim’s eyes met Spock’s. “It’s not static is it?”

Spock shook his head. Jim’s confusion welled a bit but something else lurked underneath…a longing.

“I haven’t been able to forget you after all this time,” Jim said softly. “Why?”

“Because you are mine,” Spock replied. He rubbed his thumb against the back of Jim’s hand. Jim was still confused and rightfully so. The longing brightened up and the hesitancy grew a bit more. The excitement was still there.

Jim eyed him. “Why am I yours?”

“Because you are. I would greatly like to take you to dinner tonight. To catch up and begin our courtship.”

Jim blinked. “Courtship?”

Spock nodded.

“You want to…court me?”

“It is logical as you are mine.”

“When you say court, you mean…what exactly?”

Spock squeezed Jim’s hand gently. “I mean that I wish to court you for the purpose of starting a romantic relationship that will someday soon lead to bonding and marriage.”

Jim eyes widened. “Um…are all Vulcans this forward?”

“I do not know all Vulcans so I cannot answer that question. I am this forward because you are mine and it is logical.”

Jim licked his lips again. Spock found the action stimulating and wondered about kissing those lips.

“I don’t kiss on a first date,” Jim said. “Wait…you thought that. You didn’t say that.”

“No, I did not.”

“Then how did I…” Jim trailed off and looked down at their hands. “Vulcans are telepaths.”

“Touch telepaths, yes.”

“But…I heard you.”

“Yes, we are…mentally compatible. If a thought of mine is loud enough and we are touching, you could potentially pick up on it just as I can pick up thoughts from you.”

“What am I thinking about right now?” Jim asked.

Spock quickly picked up that Jim wanted to kiss him too. “I thought you do not kiss on a first date?”

“I may break that rule later. I don’t…” Jim released Spock’s hand. “Look, this is all weird. We met once, when I was five and now…now you want to marry me. You don’t know me and I don’t know you.”

“I would like to get to know you,” Spock said. “I have been looking forward to meeting you again for eighteen years.”

“Eighteen years is a long time, Spock. I’m not five anymore.”

“And I am not eight.”

“I’ve been through a fuck ton of shit since then. I have a lot of…things in my head that you would probably won’t like.”

“Impossible,” Spock said. “You are mine. Everything you have been through has made you the person I see today and I find this person very pleasing.”

Jim smirked. “Yeah, I’m cute to look at but inside…”

“Is just as cute,” Spock interrupted. “Nothing inside will scare me away from you. We have a connection, a robust bond that nothing can break.”

“Again, we just met again after eighteen years. Hell, he had only spent an hour to two together back then. We don’t know each other. How can you say all of this? That we have a connection? That I am yours?”

“It is…difficult to explain right now, but you know what I speak is true.”

Jim eyes looked uncertain. The blonde bit his bottom lip then nodded. “This is a lot to take in.”

“Understandable,” Spock said.

Jim crossed his arms over his chest. “I’ll concede to dinner. Just dinner to start off with. Okay?”

Spock nodded. “Just dinner is agreeable.”

“I’ve thought about you in…in bad times and just the fucking thought of eight-year-old you taking me away to Vulcan, saying I was yours…I don’t know…it calmed me,” Jim admitted. “The connection, right?”


Jim bit his bottom lip again. “Just dinner.”

“You said that.”

“I know, I’m just trying to convince myself that its just dinner. No talk of connections or courting and definitely not bonding. We’ll take this slow.”

“Yes, Jim.”

Jim picked up a PADD from the table. He and Spock exchanged information.

Spock stayed in the room and stared at Jim. He couldn’t believe his t’hy’la was here in front of him.

Jim stared back for a few moments before lightly laughing, “I need to get back to studying now, Spock.”

“Of course.”

“You gotta leave now.”




“I can be quiet,” Spock said.

“I’ll see you tonight, Spock.”

“I can help you with…”

“Goodbye, Spock.”

Spock nodded. “Goodbye, Jim. I shall see you tonight.”


Two Weeks Later

Spock followed Jim into his apartment after a pleasant day together. Jim’s roommate was sitting on the couch reading a book.

“How was your day?” Bones asked Jim.

“Good. We went to the aquarium, fooled around in the photobooth…”

“Jim,” both Spock and Bones fussed.

“Had a nice dinner and oh, I’m moving in with Spock.”

“What? You just met the hobgoblin two weeks ago!”

“It is logical…” Spock tried but the cantankerous human stood up and started waving his arms around.

“Dammit, Jim, are you out of your cornfed mind?”

Spock narrowed his eyes at Bones and growled as the man approached Jim.

Bones stopped in his tracks and stared at Spock. “Did you just growl at me?”

Jim grabbed Spock’s hand and pulled him towards his bedroom. “Bones, we’ll talk in the morning.”


Jim pulled Spock into the bedroom and shut the door behind him. Spock walked over to Jim’s double bed and sat down.

“That went well,” Jim said. “And don’t growl at my friend.”

“I shall try not to.” But you are mine and Bones is a threat.

“This is a little crazy, though, right? Moving in after two weeks?” Jim walked over to where Spock sat. The Vulcan spread his legs and Jim stood between them. He rested his hands on Spock’s shoulders as Spock placed his hands on Jim’s hips.

“We are t’hy’la, it is logical to be together.”

“We can be together and live separately.”

Spock tried not to pout but had obviously failed as Jim grinned down at him.

“Look, I really can’t just skip out on Bones in the middle of our lease. He can’t take care of the whole rent by himself.”

“I see.” Spock slid his hands up Jim’s torso, moving Jim’s shirt as he went. Jim chuckled and pulled the item off of himself. Spock trailed his hands back down Jim’s now bare skin, enjoying the thrums and tingles against his fingertips at their contact.

While they were adamant on taking things slow to start with, that had not happened. They had quickly grown close and after three dates, Spock had had Jim in his bed and was quite pleased to get rid of his no fornicating in his bed rule.

Spock leaned forward and kissed just above Jim’s naval.

“Spock, we’re talking here.”

“I know.” Spock rested his chin on Jim’s stomach and looked up at him. Jim smiled and ran a hand through Spock’s hair. “How about a proposal.”

“Now, it is way too soon for marriage, Spock.”

No, it is not, but that is a conversation for another day. “Not that sort of proposal, ashal-veh. How about I move in here.”

Jim’s brows went up. “You want to live with me…and Bones?”

“I want to live with you. I would not mind having Doctor McCoy as a roommate.” As long as he does not fornicate on Jim’s bed or try and take Jim from me.

Jim laughed.


Jim shook his head. “Oh, Spock, no. No, definitely not.”

Spock arched a brow.

“I can’t put you nor Bones through that. You’d kill each other and I like you both too much to let that happen.”

“I see, but you like me more than Leonard, correct?”

“Spock,” Jim sighed.

“Correct?” Spock asked again.

Jim leaned down and kissed him gently. “I like you both differently. You’re my boyfriend. He’s my best friend.”

“I can be your best friend, too.”


“Because you are mine.”

Jim kissed him again. “We’ll need to talk about this possessiveness later.”

No. “Affirmative.”

“How about this?” Jim said. “I’ll partially move in with you.”


“I’ll live with you three days…”

“Seven days.”

“Four days,” Jim said in a tone that left no room for arguments. “Four days a week and then I’ll be here three. I’ll cover my half of rent and I’ll also have a place to come if I need some space.”

“Why would you need space?”

Jim shrugged. “Spock, I don’t know…sometimes I just need some space.”

Spock nodded. “Alright.”

“So partially moving in, okay?”

Spock nodded again.

“And having sex now?”

Spock growled and pulled Jim onto the bed. Jim laughed as he was pinned under Spock.


One Month Later

Spock sat in the small office in his apartment and offered a Vulcan salute as his parents appeared on the video screen before him.

“Mother, Father,” Spock greeted them.

“Spock,” His father said, returning the Vulcan salute.

“Kan-bu,” his mother added with a smile.

“I am not a baby, mother.”

“You are and you are my baby who has not spoken to us in weeks.”

“I message you every two point eight days, mother.”

“Yes, but all the messages say are that you are well, work is adequate, and that you hope your father and I are well.”

Spock blinked. “Are you well?”

“Spock,” his father spoke. “It has been one month since the last video call. Why?”

“Spock? Are you talking to them yet? Can I come in?” a voice came from outside the room.

His parents looked confused.

“Spock, who is that?”

Spock blinked. “Jim. My mate.”




“Jim,” his parents said at the same time.

“Yes, my mate, Jim.”

“Jim as in…the boy you tried to kidnap eighteen years ago?” Amanda asked.

“See! You did try to kidnap me!” Jim’s voice came.

Spock looked off screen. “I did not.”

“Spock, what is going on?” his parents asked.

“Jim, come here and sit.”

Jim entered the room and walked around the desk. He waved at Spock’s parents on screen. They were confused but waved back

“Spock, there isn’t another seat.”

“You may sit on my lap.”

“I’m not sitting on your lap in front of your parents,” Jim hissed.



Spock stood up and Jim took the vacant seat. Spock looked around the room then just stood behind Jim in the seat.

“Hi, I’m Jim. Jim Kirk,” Jim said to Spock’s parents. “Nice to see you both again.”

“Its nice to see you again, too, Jim,” Spock’s mother spoke. “I’m Amanda and this is Sarek.”

“I know,” Jim chuckled. “Spock talks a lot about you both.

“Yet, he has not spoken at all about you,” Sarek commented. He looked at his son pointedly.

Spock looked down.

“That would be my fault,” Jim said. “Spock and I started…well…we met again a month ago. He wanted to court right away and I didn’t. We’ve been taking this slow.”

“Yes, slow,” Spock agreed. “But Jim is my mate.”

Jim sighed. “I can’t seem to break him of this possessiveness.”

Because you are mine, Spock thought. He placed his hand on Jim’s shoulder. All mine.

“No, you can’t,” Amanda said with a smile. “It’s the Vulcan way. You just have to live with it.”

“I see,” Jim looked up at Spock. “I guess I can live with it.” He looked to Amanda. “It’s a good thing he’s cute.”

Amanda chuckled and nodded. “Yes, it is. So, Jim, tell us a little bit about yourself. Are you in Starfleet?”

“Yes, ma’am. I’m finishing up my first year as a cadet. I’m on an advanced track so I’ll be done in three years instead of four.”

“Spock finished in three years as well,” Sarek said. “Are you in the sciences?”

Jim shook his head. “No, Sir. I do love science and computers but I’m on the command track. Going to be a captain and have my own ship.” Jim looked back up to Spock. “Right, Spock?”

“Yes, ashal-vah.”

Jim beamed and focused back on Amanda and Sarek. “Spock will be my first officer.”

“Of course, he will.” Amanda agreed. “Jim, Sarek and I will be coming to San Francisco next week.”

“We are?” Sarek questioned.

“Yes, we are. We need to visit with Spock and formally meet Jim.”

“Sounds great!” Jim said. “I can’t wait to see you both. Bring baby pictures of Spock.”

“Oh, I shall,” Amanda replied as the doorbell rang.

Jim looked off camera. “I gotta go get that. Bones is here. We’re having dinner with him and Uhura. It was so nice meeting you both. Can’t wait until next week.”

Jim waved to them and Amanda and Sarek waved back before Jim stood and left the room. Spock took his seat again.

“Who is Bones?” Sarek asked.

“Doctor McCoy,” Spock replied. “He is Jim’s friend.”

“Not yours?” Amanda questioned.

Spock opened his mouth to reply when he heard Bones’ voice from down the hall ask ‘so where is the hobgoblin lurking?’ Spock shook his head. “No, he is not my friend.”

“Spock, you’ve been dating Jim a month, right?”


“You need to make friends with your mate’s friend. It is logical.”

Spock mentally agreed but Bones was…well he stole Jim’s attention a lot and Spock did not like it. Jim, though, did want them to be friendly. Spock mentally shook his head and said, “Father is not friends with your friends.”

Sarek blinked. “This is not about me.”

“Kitten see, kitten do,” Amanda muttered. “Spock, we’ll let you get to your dinner. Call us soon and we’ll see you next week.”

“Yes, Mother. Goodbye.”

“Goodbye,” his parents replied.

Spock turned off his computer and went into the next room. Bones was sitting on his couch.

“Doctor,” Spock greeted him.

“Lieutenant Commander,” Bones replied.

Spock looked around. Where was his Jim?

“Jim’s in the bathroom getting pretty for dinner, I think,” Bones said.

Spock turned back to Bones. “Uhura will also be joining us.”



“What restaurant are we going to?” Bones asked.

“A steakhouse by the bay. Jim said…”

“Jim says a lot,” Bones interrupted. “Is it Bill’s Steakhouse?”


“We shouldn’t go there.”


“Because every time I’ve been there with Jim, he’s left with an allergic reaction. I think it’s the seasoning they use but Jim disagrees and he’s a stubborn one.”

Spock took a seat in a chair near the couch. Jim is stubborn, but cute. “Allergic reaction? I know Jim has a few allerg…”

Bones snorted. “A few? Hell no. He has way more than a few. I don’t even have a list of all of them.”

“Fascinating.” Perhaps he will be useful in keeping my mate healthy.

“Also, Jim should ease up on the red meat. I think he’s already put on the freshman fifteen as they say.”

Freshman fifteen?

“Alright, I’m ready to go,” Jim announced as he came back into the room. He looked between them. “Are ya’ll getting along?”

“Yes, Bones has informed me that you always have an allergic reaction when going to Bill’s Steakhouse so we will not be going there.”

Jim’s jaw dropped. “No, I don’t always…you know sometimes I do…I just…won’t order…oh c’mon, I want steak!”

“We will go to O’Callaghan’s,” Bones said, standing up. “They have good steak.”

“But Bill’s.”

Spock stood up and went to Jim’s side. “Jim, I think it would be beneficial to stay away from Bill’s Steakhouse. I do not want to lose you to a preventable allergic reaction.”

Jim smiled at Spock. “Fine, we won’t go to Bill’s.”

“Oh you cave to him easily but always fuss when I try to get you to not do something.”

Jim looked at his friend. “Spock fucks me into next week. You don’t.”

“Jim do not say that,” Spock growled. But it is true.

“Dammit, Jim, I don’t want to hear that!”

“Then don’t question why I don’t listen to you. Besides, I don’t always listen to Spock. Right, Spock?”

Spock nodded. He had tried to get Jim to cease being friendly with Uhura’s flirtatious Orion roommate. He has not listened. Spock held up two fingers to Jim which Jim happily met in a Vulcan kiss.

“Jim, what is the freshman fifteen?”

Jim shot Bones’ a look. “Are you telling him I’m getting fat?”

“No, why would I do that?” Bones asked innocently.

Fat? My mate is not fat. He is…Spock looked at Jim. Fit and…Spock glanced down to Jim’s posterior. “Jim, how about we reschedule dinner and…”

“No, I want steak so let’s go to Bill’s.”

“We said no Bill’s,” Spock and Bones said.

Jim shrugged and grabbed his coat from nearby. “You did? Oh, I wasn’t listening.”

“Jim,” they both sighed.

“Besides, Uhura and Gaila are already there and we can’t make them up and leave.”

“Jim,” they tried again.

Gaila? Why?

“C’mon, Bonesy. C’mon, Spockums, time for dinner!” Jim then walked out the front door.

Spock and Bones exchanged an exasperated look before following after Jim.

“Do you have a hypo?” Spock asked.

“I always have hypos when I’m around Jim,” Bones replied.


Chapter Text

Age 28 Part 1

A breathy groan fell from Spock’s lips at the sight of Jim on top of him. He wasn’t expecting to wake up to Jim on top of him in such a way, but Spock was not complaining. He gripped Jim’s hips as his mate moved up and down on his cock. Jim’s head was thrown back and back arched as he kept up a steady pace.

“Spock,” Jim moaned.

“Mine,” Spock grunted in response. He started rolling his hips up, meeting Jim’s movements. He took one hand off of Jim’s hip and slowly trailed it up Jim’s chest to a pert nipple and gently pinched. Jim keened and leaned into the touch as Spock rolled the nub between his fingers. This part of Jim’s anatomy was extremely sensitive and drew interesting noises and reactions from Jim.

Jim’s hands slid up Spock’s torso to rest on Spock’s hairy chest. He raised his hips up until Spock was almost out of him then slammed down. The couple let out guttural noises at the action.  Jim started moving faster, riding Spock hard; gasping and moaning in pleasure as he did, his cock bouncing against his abdomen.

Spock groaned again. While he liked being in control, he found great pleasure in this position and letting Jim take the lead.  He moved his hand from Jim’s chest and pulled Jim down by the back of his neck, leaning up himself to meet Jim in a fierce kiss.

Mine, Spock thought.

Jim mewled into his mouth and let Spock control the kiss, rocking his hips back and forth. Yes, all yours, Spock.

Spock released Jim’s mouth a few moments later when Jim needed to breath. Jim threw his head back and cried out, reaching a hand down to his cock.

“Fuck, I’m close,” Jim moaned, stroking himself quickly.

Spock nodded and started moving his hips up harder and faster into Jim’s tight channel, nailing Jim’s sweet spot.

“AH, Spock…yes!” Jim arched his back and moaned. He released his cock and leaned forward, gripping the headboard of their bed as he met Spock’s thrusts—grinding down just as hard.  Their bodies and bond thrummed with pleasure.

Jim clenched his eyes closed and cried out as he emptied himself onto his and Spock’s stomachs.  Spock followed soon after, releasing deep inside his lover and growling Jim’s name.  Jim plopped down onto Spock and attempted to catch his breath.   Spock squirmed underneath him and eased his softening member out of Jim. 

“That was amazing,” Jim huffed out. He turned over and laid next to Spock on the bed. “Happy anniversary, Spockums.”

“Happy anniversary, t’hy’la,” Spock replied. “Was that my present?” Spock looked to Jim and asked.

Jim chuckled and looked back at him. “Yeah.”

“It is the same present you gave me last year.”

“Are you complaining?”

“I am not complaining. I will have a similar present for you later.”

Jim turned onto his side and smiled at Spock. “Those are the best kinds of presents. Can’t believe we’ve been together two years.”

“Neither can I.” Spock turned onto his side as well and gently cupped Jim’s cheek. I also have trouble believing we have been bonded for one year and six months.

Well you did say we have compatible minds and a robust connection.

Indeed. Because you are mine.

Jim leaned forward and kissed Spock. “And you are mine.”

“Affirmative,” Spock said against Jim’s lips. He kissed Jim deeper then asked, “Would you like to partake in a shower together before classes?”

“Is that my present?”

“No, your present will involve the bed and my tongue tonight.”

Jim grinned. “Well I’m all for showering together then.”


After a particularly long shower, Jim and Spock sat together at their small dining table by their kitchen and had breakfast. Jim fiddled with a PADD near him for several moments before Spock arched a brow.


Jim looked up. “Yeah?”

Spock eyed the PADD then his mate.

“Oh, um…I have something I want to talk to you about.”

“Then talk.”

“Well…I know you program the kobayashi maru.”

“No, Jim.”

“You don’t even know what I’m going to say!”

“You have tried twice already to beat my test. I will not help you with it. It is against the honor code.”

“I’m not asking for help to beat it. Its unbeatable right?”

Spock nodded. His test was unbeatable. He liked his test.

“Well I don’t think it should be unbeatable,” Jim said. “The test is a cheat.”

“Excuse me?” Spock asked. My test is not a cheat.

It is, Spock, Jim replied.

“No, you just have not understood the parameters.”

Jim snorted and waved his hands. “Oh, I understand, I just don’t like them. I don’t believe in no win scenarios.”

“I am aware. Several months ago, you refused to leave the academy carnival until you won a stuffed sehlat for me. You spent four hours at that particular game and spent numerous credits.”

Jim waved his hand towards their stuffed sehlat on the living room couch. “Hey, I beat that damn game and now we have Sir Cuddlesworth to show for it.”

Spock looked at the stuffed animal. “It is cute.”

“Thank you.”

“But, Jim,” Spock shook his head. “That game and my test are completely different. The purpose of the test is to experience fear. Fear in the face of certain death. To accept that fear and maintain command of one's self and one's crew. This is a quality expected in every Starfleet captain.”

“And that’s great!” Jim said a little too loudly. “But out there, out in space, any captain would have a fighting chance.  This test is…narrow in the possibilities of what could happen and what a captain could do to save their crew.”

“Jim, the purpose of the test is not to win.”

Jim huffed. “What about my dad, huh?”

“Your father?”

“Yeah, do you think he won?”

Spock arched a brow. “I suppose he did win, despite the loss of his life.”

“He was in an apparent no-win scenario. A real-life Kobayashi Maru, and he found a way to win. Out of the limited options he had, he found one that saved his whole crew.  If the Kobayashi Maru was programmed properly than there would be more options for the captain—limited options, but options.  Because it is impossible for a cadet to simultaneously save the Kobayashi Maru, avoid a fight with the Klingons, and escape from the neutral zone with the starship intact with the programming there is.”

Jim slid his PADD over to Spock. There were streams of code running along the screen.

“I created a code, a subroutine, to give whoever is taking the test a fighting chance. That’s all. It’s a roll of the dice what happens and it’s up to the captain to decide how to handle the chance they’re given. Please take a look at it. For me. Your adorable mate. Your adorable mate that loves you super duper much.”

Spock’s eye twitched. His mate wanted him to change his test.

“Spock, I’m not asking you to change anything with your test. I just want you to take a look at my code. If you don’t like it, then I’ll concede to having lost the Maru and will move on.”

Spock took the PADD from Jim. “I will look it over.”

Jim leaned across the table and kissed Spock’s cheek. “Thank you.” Jim stood up and started cleaning up the table.

“Oh, your parents will be coming into town tomorrow.”

“I am aware. I will pick them up from the shuttle station and take them to the embassy,” Spock replied as he skimmed through Jim’s code. So far it was quite impressive.

“Why thank you,” Jim commented on that thought. “I made reservations for all of as at Bill’s tomorrow evening. Me, you, Bones, Uhura, your parents—to celebrate our anniversary.”

“Not Bills,” Spock sighed. “I will make reservations somewhere else.”

“Spoil sport.” Jim kissed Spock’s cheek. “Love you and I’ll see you tonight.”

“Taluhk nash-veh k'dular.”


“I thought we were going to that steakhouse you like so much, Jim?” Amanda asked as their hostess lead them to a large table in the restaurant that wasn’t Bill’s.

Jim gave Spock a look before replying, “Apparently he thinks that I’ll die eating at Bill’s.”

“You experience an allergic reaction every time you have eaten there,” Spock said. “Doctor McCoy can attest to this.”

Bones nodded. “Yep, every time.”

“Then why do you eat there, Jim?” Amanda fussed. They all took their seats at the table.

“It would seem you would want to avoid such an establishment,” Sarek spoke.

“They have good steak,” Jim shrugged. “And my reactions are minimal at best.”

“It is still a reaction,” Spock argued. “But we are not there tonight.”

“Sadly no,” Jim chuckled. He looked to Uhura. “So how are things?”

“Good. I have some time in the long rang sensor lab coming up.”

“Hoping to pick up anything?”

She nodded. “Yes. That last time I was in there I picked up some chatter about a Klingon prison planet. I’m hopping to see if I can hear that again.”

“Klingon prison planet,” Sarek spoke. “Fascinating.”

“Leonard, how is Joanna doing?” Amanda asked. “It was so nice to see her at Christmas.”

Bones smiled. “She’s good, ma’am. Joined the science club at school because of her little crush on Spock.”

Jim grinned. Joanna had loved Spock since the day they first met. Always followed him around, asking questions, wanting to touch his ears. Jim thought it was cute.

It is cute, Spock agreed.

“Oh, how wonderful,” Amanda said. “Makes me want to have a grandbaby to spoil.”

Jim stared at his mother-in-law. “What?”

Sarek shook his head. “She is just saying. We, of course, would not pressure you to into giving us a grandchild right now.”





Well…I would like a child.

Jim shot his mate a look. Not going to happen right now.

I am aware. Five years?



Jim shook his head. He looked back to his in-laws as now Uhura and Bones looked amused. “Maybe in another decade or so,” he told them. “I’m not even out of my twenties yet. Spock and I have time.”

“Yes, but when Spock’s time comes around, perhaps then you two can have a child,” Sarek said.

Jim raised a brow. “Spock’s time?”

“We do not speak of it.”

“But you said…” Jim tried but Spock interrupted.

“Mother, how is your book club coming along on Vulcan?”

Jim eyed his mate. What is your time thing?

As Amanda began discussing her club, Spock replied to his mate, Nothing.


I will tell you later.

Your mate wants to know now.


We can play naughty cadet later if you tell me now.

Spock caved. It is called Pon Farr. It is the time for mating and it drives a male Vulcan mad. During its onset, a Vulcan loses all emotional and mental control. You burn in the blood fever or plak tow. To satiate the blood fever, one must meld and bond with another and mate or die.


I would take you repeatedly over the course of a few days to a week in order to satiate the blood fever.

Take…take repeatedly.

Yes. It is a shameful time for a Vulcan.

Repeatedly mate, Jim thought. Jim took that information in and then broke out in a huge grin.

Amanda stopped talking and chuckled. “Jim?”

“Pon farr!” Jim said a little too loudly.

“Spock,” Sarek lightly hissed. “Now is not the time to discuss that. Especially around others.” He glanced to Uhura and Bones who now looked confused.

“My mate had the right to know,” Spock replied. And now we get to play naughty cadet later.

“How did I not know about this until now!” Jim said. A few people from other tables looked at them oddly. Jim lowered his voice. “We’ve been together two years. You would think something like pon farr would need to be talked about asap.”

“Pon farr?” Uhura questioned.

“It is nothing,” Sarek and Spock told her.

“Its crazy sexy hot Vulcan mating time,” Jim said with a small laugh.

“Oh, good god,” Bones groaned.

“It is not crazy sexy hot anything,” Spock told him.

“Indeed, it is not,” Sarek agreed.

“Oh, it is,” Amanda spoke with a grin herself.

 “Jim,” Spock sighed.

“Amanda,” Sarek sighed too.

Jim grinned back at his mother-in-law and nodded. “Yes! Vulcans are awesome.”

“Do you know what’s going on?” Uhura asked Bones.

“No, and I don’t wanna know,” he replied.


The next afternoon, Jim and Spock saw to Amanda and Sarek’s departure back to Vulcan. They hugged and wished one another well and promised to visit soon. A few days later, Spock conceded that Jim’s subroutine was sound and would be beneficial to adding to his test.

“Told you so,” Jim told him as they sat in Spock’s office in between classes.

“Indeed. Testing will begin…”

“Can I test it first?” Jim asked. “I mean, I already signed up to take the test a third time. May as well use it to test the subroutine.”

“Logical,” Spock agreed.


Spock watched his mate lounged in the captain’s chair of the simulation bridge. Uhura tapped at the simulation’s computer screen. She turned to Jim. “We are receiving a distress signal from the USS Kobayashi Maru. The ship is stranded and has lost power.  Starfleet Command has ordered us to rescue them.”

Jim smirked at his friend. “Captain.  Starfleet has ordered us to rescue them…Captain.”

Uhura quirked her brows up at him in response, giving him a you can’t be serious look.

Spock shook his head at the scene from up in the control room.

Jim, behave.

“Klingon vessels have entered the Neutral Zone and are firing on us,” Bones said a second later.

“Okay,” Jim responded. Spock watched his mate squirm in the captain’s chair, looking around for something.

Bones, Uhura, and the rest of the bridge crew exchanged a look. The proctors in the control room above them also exchanged looks with one another.

Jim/ You should take this a little bit more seriously, ashayam, Spock told him. The chance you may get could very well not be a good one. And what are you going?

I know, I know. I’m prepared for anything. Oh, my apple! Jim pulled the apple out from where it was behind him and waved it up at the control room. Found my apple, sweetie.

“Okay?” Bones questioned.

“Yeah, don’t worry about it,” Jim said, rubbing the apple on his simulation uniform top.

“Three more Klingons vessels have appeared,” Bones spoke again. He tapped at his station’s screen.  “They’re targeting the ship, but I guess that isn’t a problem?”

Jim took a bite of his apple before replying with, “Nope, no problem.” 

Spock shook his head. You are illogical.

But you love me.

Indeed, I do, but please pay attention.

I am. I am.

“They are firing, Captain,” a cadet in the simulation told him.

Jim sat up a bit straighter. Damn, is the subroutine going to come on? “Uhura, alert medical to prepare to receive all crew from the damaged ship.” Jim went with that—best be prepared for whatever happens.

“We are surrounded by Klingons, Captain,” Uhura replied.  “How do you expect us to rescue them?”

Jim grinned and turned his chair to face her and said, “Alert medical.”

Uhura rolled her eyes and did as Jim asked.

Bones looked from his screen as the red alert klaxon started sounding on the simulation. “We’re being hit.  Shields at sixty percent.”

“Got it.”

“Should we fire back?”

Jim took another bite of his apple and then shook his head, “Nah.  We’re good.” I think we’re good. Come on subroutine—you should’ve kicked in by now. Did Spock turn it off?

I did not turn it off. It should kick in…Spock cut off his line of dialogue when all the computers and screens in the room went black before turning back on. This better not break my test.

I don’t think it will, Jim replied. I’m sorry if it does, though.

“What the hell was that?” Bones fussed.

Jim smiled as the screens in the simulations came back on as everyone in the room looked puzzled by what just happened.  Uhura shook her head and looked at her computer screen before saying, “We are still being…wait…no…the Klingons have stopped firing.  The Kobayashi Maru is still in distress, though.”

Yes, a great chance! Jim stood up from his captain’s chair. “Arm photons.  Prepare to fire at the Klingons.”

Bones grumbled to himself before saying, “Their shields are still up, Jim.”

“Really?  Check again.”

Bones sighed before turning back to the screen.  His eyes went wide at what he saw on the screen, “No.  No, their shields are down.”

“Good.  Then fire on all the enemy ships.  Only one photon each should be fine.  We don’t need to waste ammunition.”

“Targets locked on all Klingon vessels.  Firing now!” one of the others in the simulation said.

Jim smiled and made a gun shape with his hand using his thumb and index finger. “Pew pew,” he said at the screen as the ships blew up.  

His simulation crew looked at their screens, stunned at what just happened.  The people up in the observation deck were just as dumbfounded.

Pew pew? Spock questioned.

“Sir,” a programmer in the control room spoke. “What just happened?”

Jim sat back down and lounged in the chair like he owned it and grinned, “Begin rescue of the Kobayashi Maru crew, please.”

Uhura nodded as Jim continued talking, “We have eliminated all enemy ships.  No one on board was injured and rescuing the crew is now underway.  I think this has been a success.”

“A subroutine,” Spock told the control room. “It gives captains a fighting chance.”

Jim then looked up at the observation window and smirked at the people standing there. Spock gave a small smile in return.

“My mate came up with it,” Spock said.


After everyone left, Spock checked over the computers in the observation room while Jim stayed behind in the simulator room. He knew his mate was replaying in his head other scenarios and how he would’ve handled them. Spock was impressed and knew his mate would make a fine captain someday. Spock left him alone in his own little world for a while before he made his way down to the simulator bridge.

“Spock,” Jim said, opening his eyes and smiling.

“You did well, ashal-veh.”

“Thanks. How confused were the other programmers?”

“Quite confused.”

“Did they think I cheated?”

“They did but I assured them you did not. I explained the subroutine. Cadet Vro suggested that you be put up for a commendation for original thinking.”

“Oh? And will you put me up for commendation?” Jim stood from his chair and walked closer to his mate.

“Perhaps.” Spock wrapped his arms around his mate and pulled him close. Jim kissed him soundly.

“Love you.”

“I love you as well, my mate.”

“Possessive much?”

“Affirmative.” Spock kissed him again.


Spock and Jim ceased kissing and looked to the doorway. Bones stood there, avoiding looking at his friends.

“Yeah, Bonesy?” Jim asked.

“There’s been a distress call from Vulcan,” he said.

“What?” Spock questioned.

“Everyone is being ordered to report to Shuttle Hangar One immediately.”

My parents, Spock thought before he, Jim, and Bones, bolted from the room.

Chapter Text

Age 28 Part 2

Spock moved through the shuttle bay, heading towards where he needed to go. Uhura had already interrupted him and he had put her on the Enterprise. He was worried about his parents. He could still feel their bonds with him. They were alright. For now. He needed to get to Vulcan.


Spock stopped walked and turned around. His mate quickly approached. “Hey, honey, look, they put me on the Farragut. You need to switch me to the Enterprise.”

“Jim, I cannot…”

“Bullshit, I know you switched Uhura. Switch me. The Enterprise is where I belong. You need me there.” Jim looked at him with his big blue eyes. Spock had to resist them. He didn’t know what was going on on Vulcan but he needed Jim safe.

Spock looked at his PADD and tapped at the screen. “Actually, Cadet, you are mistaken.”

Jim smiled.

“You are not on any ship. You are now grounded. Report back to the Academy.” Spock turned on his heel and walked off.

“Spock! Spock! You can’t do that!”

Spock tuned his mate out, disappearing in to the crowd and soon boarded his shuttle. He had to keep Jim safe. Jim yelled at him through their bond.

Spock, you pointy jerk! Why did you do that? You know I can help! Spock!

Clenching his fists tightly, Spock apologized then put up shields in his mind, shutting himself off from his mate. Jim tried to break it down but Spock held it up. Soon Jim stopped and it was quiet. Too quiet in Spock’s mind.

I am sorry, t’hy’la.


Spock thought of unshielding as he took his seat on the bridge but decided against it. Jim was no doubt still mad at him. Pike entered the bridge and Spock turned to watch him take his seat. Spock arched a brow seeing a familiar face at the helmsman spot.

Sulu. How nice that he is now a helmsman, Spock thought.

“The fleet's cleared space dock, Captain,” Sulu announced from his station. “All ships ready for warp.”

Spock turned back to his station and started tapping at screens and checking sensors.

“Set course for Vulcan,” Pike said.

Sulu confirmed the course.

“Good. Maximum warp. Punch it.”

Spock was prepared to feel the ship take off but after a moment of nothing, he turned around. Other ships were warping away around them but the Enterprise was at a standstill. Sulu looked confused and started pressing buttons and controls at his station.  --

Pike sighed, “Lieutenant, where's Helmsman McKenna?”

“He has lungworms, sir,” Sulu replied before turning to Pike.  “I’m Hikaru Sulu.”

“And you are a pilot, right?”

“Yes sir, very much so.  I’m just…not sure what is wrong here…”

Spock started thinking about the ship and what could be holding them up.

“Is the parking brake one?”

 Sulu chuckled and shook his head.  He turned back to his station and said, “No, sir.  I just…”

Spock thought of something, “Lieutenant Sulu, have you disengaged the external inertial dampener?”

Sulu glanced back to Spock over his shoulders with eyes narrowed. He looked back at his station and pressed a few buttons.

“Ready for warp, Captain,” Sulu then said.

“So, the parking brake was on?” Pike asked with a smile.

Sulu didn’t look back but he nodded, “Yes, sir.”

“Alright well punch it now.”

“First the coffee machine and now this,” Spock picked up Sulu mumbling as the ship sped off into warp.

Coffee machine? It was not even plugged in. Spock shook his head and went back to his work and worrying about his planet and parents.


“Jim,” Spock gasped as his mate burst onto the bridge, followed closely by Bones and Uhura. Spock narrowed his eyes at Bones. Bones was a good friend to Jim but this was unacceptable.

Jim gave Spock a look that wasn’t all that friendly before he focused on Captain Pike.

“Kirk, what the hell are you doing on board the Enterprise?” Pike asked, his voice raised slightly.

Spock stood and went to his captain’s side as Bones put himself between them and Jim.

“He is experiencing a severe reaction to a vaccine,” Bones told them.  “He is delusional and…”

 “Vulcan isn't experiencing a natural disaster, it's being attacked, Sir,” Jim spoke over Bones. “Attacked by Romulans.”

“Jim…Cadet Kirk,” Pike sighed out before looking to Bones and telling him to report back to medbay.

Bones nodded and hit Jim with another hypo before leaving the bridge.  Spock stared at his mate, hard. Why was his mate so stubborn? He loved him so much but dammit, he needed his mate somewhere safe.

“Captain, Kirk is to be considered a stowaway,” Spock looked to Pike and said. “I will remove…”

“You won’t do anything, Spock,” Jim interrupted before stepping closer to Pike. “Sir, you need to stop the ship…”

I won’t do anything? Excuse me but I am your husband and will do everything I can to protect you, you illogical human. Spock spoke, “You are recommending a full stop in the transwarp in the midst of a rescue…”

They went back and forth with arguing over lightning storms, Klingon prison escapes, and Romulans, until finally, Spock looked away from Jim and nodded to Pike, “Jim’s logic is sound, Sir, and Lieutenant Uhura is unmatched in xenolinguistics.  We would be wise to accept her conclusion and Jim’s.”

Pike started telling the communications officer to scan Vulcan space for Romulan transmissions. When he couldn’t, Uhura stepped in. Uhura went to the station as Jim looked away from Chris and stood behind the Captain’s chair, ignoring Spock.  






“The other ships are out of warp,” an officer spoke up.  “They have arrived at Vulcan, Sir, but we seem to have lost all contact.”

“Captain, I’m not picking up any Romulan transmission or any other transmission in the area,” Uhura said.  “There seems to be something jamming all communication around Vulcan.”

“Its because they are being attacked, Captain,” Jim said, looking at Pike. “Please.”

Pike looked at Jim for a few moments before nodding and turning back to the rest of the bridge, “Shields up. Ready all weapons.”


Soon, it was chaos.


Spock gripped the arms of the captain’s chair tightly. He stared at the blue dot on the screen that represented Jim. His mate. He then looked to Chekov when he heard the boy suck in a breath.

“Chekov,” Spock said.

“Keptin…Sir…gravitational sensors are off ze scale,” Chekov stated.  “If my calculations are correct, that pod zey launched is…it is creating a singularity…that will consume ze planet.”

Spock’s eyes went slightly wide at hearing that.

Father, Mother, Spock thought before saying, “They are creating a black hole…at the center of Vulcan?”

“Yes, Sir.”

“How long does the planet have?”

“Minutes, Sir.  Minutes.”

Spock paused for a moment before ordering Uhura to alert Vulcan Command Center to signal a planet wide evacuation.

“What? Spock?” Uhura questioned, but Spock shook his head and headed for the turbolift.

“Chekov, beam my mate aboard and Sulu. Now,” Spock ordered as the turbolift doors closed. As soon as the lift doors opened again, he Spock quickly rushed into the transporter room. His mate was not there. He turned to the Chief manning the controls.

“Where is Jim? Beam them aboard!”

“They are moving too fast, Sir,” the transporter Chief said.  “They are in freefall. I cannot get a lock on their signal.”

“Get a lock on him now,” Spock growled.

“They are…”

“I can do zat!” Chekov’s voice rang through the comms.

Spock nearly sighed in relief before pushing the transporter chief out of the way for when the young Russian reached them. When Chekov showed up, he sat down at the terminal and immediately started tapping at the screen.

“I got zem!”

Spock sighed in relief when Jim and Sulu rematerialized, slamming down onto the transporter pad.  Jim groaned and carefully stood up before helping Sulu to his feet.

“Thanks,” Sulu told Kirk.

“Yeah…no problem,” Kirk replied.

Spock approached and hugged his mate, thankful he was safe.

“Spock, they sent something into the core.”

“I know.” Spock released Jim and moved to the transporter pad.

“Spock, what are you doing?”

“I am going to the surface,” Spock said.  “Report to medbay.”

“Going to the surface?” Jim questioned. “Are you crazy? Spock, the planet is breaking apart. You can’t…”

“Energize,” Spock interrupted Jim and said. He soon dematerialized and reappeared on Vulcan’s surface near a cave. Spock moved towards it, phaser in hand. He heard a whirling noise and stopped. “Jim, go back.”

Jim appeared next to him. “No, we’re a team, where you go, I go. Now c’mon, lets get your parents.”

The ground started to sake and rocks fell from the side of the mountain. Spock nodded. There was no time to argue. There was as shuttle stationed not far from the cave’s entrance. They ignored it and entered the cave.

They ran through the halls of the cave, avoiding falling rocks and tripping up as the ground continued to quake. Jim followed him and soon they came to the and came to the katric ark chamber.  He immediately saw his parents and the other members of the high council.

“Spock!” his mother exclaimed. “Jim!”

“The planet is collapsing in on itself.  We must evacuate now,” Spock told them. He grabbed his mother’s hand. Sarek nodded and motioned for the council members to follow. They moved quickly moved through the cave hallways as the ground shook more and more. When they managed to exit the cave, some of the council members started to run toward the shuttle.

“Stop!” Spock yelled at them.  “There is no time.”  Spock then took out his communicator and contacted the Enterprise that they were ready to be beamed up.

His mother released his hand and stepped closer to the side to the cliff. The planet was crumbling and breaking apart around them. A violent quake under them caused them all to nearly lose balance. A crack formed where Amanda stood. Spock reached out to her as the ground started to give way where she stood.


Amanda turned, her eyes wide. The ground gave way and she started to fall. Jim lurched forward and grabbed her from falling. They lost balance and started to fall to the rocky surface near the group just before they started to be beamed up.

When they reappeared a moment later on the transporter pad, Spock turned around and found Jim and his mother on the ground. Sarek went to them.

“She needs medbay,” Jim said, easing Amanda out of his arms and onto the floor. “I think she hit a rock when we fell. Her head is bleeding.”

“Amanda,” Sarek said. He picked her up as Bones ran into the room. Bones swore under his breath then motioned for Sarek to follow him.

Spock stood still and watched his father carry his motionless mother off to medbay with Bones. The Vulcan council members then followed a few nurses and other personal and soon it was just Spock and Jim in the room.

Jim stepped into his space. He was still wearing the blue suit. His bright blue eyes met Spock’s. Jim had dirt and a few marks on his face. Spock looked away. Jim tried to reach out to him through their bond but Spock kept the shields in place.

“Spock, don’t shut me out,” Jim said softly, stepping closer.

Spock’s hands began to shake. “My mind is…disordered.”

“Then let me in,” Jim said. He reached out and touched Spock’s cheeks with his hands. “Let me in. I can help you calm down. Spock, t’hy’la.”

Spock leaned into the touch. Jim was right. He could help. Just being touched by him put Spock at ease. But Nero…Nero had taken his planet. Had taken his captain. Had nearly taken his parents…his mother. Spock shook his head and stepped away from Jim.

“Report to medbay. You need medical attention.”


Spock brushed past Jim and walked away. He went to the bridge, ignoring Uhura as he sat down and took in the sight before him in the viewscreen. Spock clenched his fists. His heart hammered in his side as he fought back tears. His planet, his home, was gone. There were not little pieces floating around. Just nothingness where his home should be.

Spock’s hand shook as he pressed the record button on the captain’s chair. “Act…” Spock’s voice hitched. He took in a breath and tried again. “Acting Captain's log. Stardate 2256.42: I have assumed command of the Enterprise. Captain Pike has not returned nor contacted us. I have therefore classified him a hostage of the war criminal known as Nero.”

Spock paused and closed his eyes for a moment. He could feel eyes on him. “Nero has destroyed my home planet. My Vulcan.” Spock opened his eyes. “Vulcan is gone as is most of its six billion inhabitants. I estimate no more than ten thousand have survived. While the essence of our culture has been saved, in the elders who now reside upon this ship... I am now a member of an endangered species.” Spock clicked the recorder off.


A little while later, Spock and the crew were back on the bridge. He was able to confirm with them that Nero was heading to Earth next.

“Earth maybe his next stop, but we should assume that every Federation planet is a target,” Jim said, turning the chair towards Spock.

Spock walked across the bridge and said, “Out of the chair.”

Jim rolled his eyes and got up.  Spock ignored him and continued to walk around the bridge.

“Nero stated that he wanted me see something,” Spock said. “The destruction of my planet.”

“How the hell did they do that anyway?” Bones questioned.  “When did the Romulans get that kind of weaponry?

“The engineering comprehension necessary to create a black hole may be the answer,” Jim spoke up. 

Everyone turned to him. Jim looked at them all and shrugged, “What? I happen to be a genius. Right, Spock.”

“Indeed,” Spock said.

Jim nodded and continued. “Look, the technology could theoretically be manipulated to create a tunnel through space time.”

Spock was about to open his mouth and respond when Bones fussed, “Dammit, Jim, I’m a doctor, not a physicist.  Are you seriously suggesting they’re from the future?”

“If you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth,” Spock responded.

“Okay, then why would an angry Romulan from the future want Pike? Or want you to watch your planet be destroyed?” Jim questioned, looking to his mate.

“Captain Pike does have details of Starfleet’s defenses,” Sulu said.

“Logical,” Spock said. “But still does not explain how he knew me.”

Jim spoke up. “What we need to do is catch up with that ship.  Disable it, take it over and get Pike back.”

Spock quirked an eyebrow up at his mate’s suggestion before saying, “Captain Pike left us with standing orders, Mr. Kirk.” Jim raised at brow at him for calling him Mr. Kirk. “We are to rendezvous with the fleet on the other side of the quadrant.  A rescue attempt would be illogical as we are technologically outmatched in every way.”

“Everything is illogical to you isn’t it, Mr. Spock?” Jim bit back. 

Spock eyed him. His mate was upset with him.

“Also,” Chekov said, softly, not wanting to really get in the middle of Jim and Spock. “We could not overtake Nero’s ship.  Zey would have to drop out of warp for us to do zat.”

Jim turned to the Russian and said, “What…what about assigning engineering crews to try and boost our warp yield?”

Spock shook his head, “Remaining power and crew are being used to repair radiation leaks on the lower decks and…”

Jim groaned and interrupted his husband, “Okay, okay...”

“…damage to subspace communications, without which we cannot contact Starfleet. We must…”

“…there has got to be some other way then.”

“We must gather with the rest of Starfleet,” Spock finished, looking to his mate. “To balance the terms out our next engagement…”

“There won’t be a next engagement, Spock! By the time we have gathered, it’ll be too late,” Jim stepped closer to his mate and continued. “Spock, you say he’s from the future? Knows what’s about to happen? Then the logical thing to do is be unpredictable.”

“You are assuming that Nero knows how events are predicted to unfold.  On the contrary, Nero’s very presence here has altered the flow of history. Beginning with the Kelvin attack and culminating in the events of today…thereby created a new chain of incidents that cannot be anticipated by either party.”

“What?” Bones asked, confused.

“And alternate reality,” Uhura said.

Spock glanced to her and nodded, “Precisely.  Whatever lives we might have lived, if the time continuum was disrupted…our destinies have changed.” 

Jim and Spock stared at each other before Spock turned and headed for the captain’s chair. He sat down and told Sulu to plot course for the Laurentian system.”

Jim shook his head and went to his mate in the captain’s chair, “Spock, please don’t do that. We cannot run back to the rest of the fleet. It’s a massive waste of time…”

“These are the orders Captain Pike issued before he left the ship…”

“He also ordered us to go back for him! Spock, you’re captain now…”

“I am aware of my responsibilities, Mr. Kirk…”

“Every fucking second we waste, Nero is getting closer to his next target…”

“That is correct. And as I am in command…”

“I will not allow us to go away from the problem instead of hunting Nero down!” Jim yelled.

Spock narrowed his eyes at Jim and stood up. Jim glared back as Spock calmly said, “Security, escort him out.”

Two security guards approached Jim and grabbed him by his forearms. The guards turned Jim and started to escort him out.  When they were almost to the doors, Jim started to struggle and fight with the guards.  He managed to knock one down as he heard Bones yelling for him to stop.

Jim was about to knock the other one down when he felt someone grab his neck.  Jim then dropped down to the floor like a sack of potatoes.

Spock stood over his unconscious mate on the floor before telling the guards to get Jim off the ship.

If he will not do as I say, then the safest place for him is off the ship.  I need him to be safe…cannot live without him, Spock thought before turning and going back to the chair and sitting down. I have already lost my planet. My mother is…I cannot lose my t’hy’la.

Bones went up to Spock and started fussing, “What the hell is your problem?  He’s your goddamn husband and you’re just…kicking him off the ship?”

“Doctor McCoy,” Spock turned to Jim’s friend and said tersely. “My mate would not be on this ship, in danger, if you had not brought him aboard. You should be in medbay anyway seeing to the patients. Now, go to your station or I can arrange for you to join Jim if you wish?”

Bones looked like he wanted to ague more, but reluctantly nodded and walked away.

Jim being safe is my priority, Spock kept thinking.  Nero is not heading for Earth at the moment, Spock told himself.  We have time to rendezvous with the rest of Starfleet.


Spock sat on the bridge for a while before leaving and checking on his mother in medbay. Bones looked up at him from his desk but said nothing as Spock approached where his mother laid in a biobed.

“She is well,” his father said. He was standing vigil at her side. “She is still unconscious but Leonard believes she will wake soon.”

“What was her injury?” Spock asked, his eyes on his mother’s face. She still had her Vulcan clothes on. A small tinge of red blood was smeared in her hair.

“A laceration to her temple. Mostly like caused by hitting rock. And a concussion. No signs of traumatic brain injury. She will recover.”

Spock nodded. It could have been a lot worse. So much worse.

“Leonard said you sent Jim off the ship,” Sarek continued.

Spock gave Bones a look then faced his father. “The safest place for my mate is off this ship.”

“I disagree. Your mate is needed here with you. You are in distress and…”

“I am well,” Spock snapped. “I am the captain. We are rendezvousing with the rest of the fleet. Everything will be fine.”

“Fine has variable definitions. Spock, perhaps you should meditate.”

Spock shook his head. “I am well. Please inform me when mother wakes up.” Spock turned on his heel and walked away. He knew he should listen to his father—to mediate—perhaps even turn the starship around and collect his mate, but he couldn’t. He paused on his way back to the bridge. He closed his eyes. He could feel Jim, even with the shield, he could always feel an inkling of his mate. But now…now he felt something else. Like something was…touching his mate’s mind.

Spock growled. No one was to touch his mate in that way. The feeling dissipated soon after and Spock was alone in his head again.


On the bridge, an alarm started to flash.  Chekov looked to his console and then said, “Keptin Spock, we’re detecting unauthorized access to a water turbine control board.”

Spock perked up in his seat. What? He stood and went to Chekov.

“Bring up video,” Spock told him.

Chekov nodded and brought up the security videos on screen.  He enlarged one and they saw his mate and another man running around the engineering deck.

T’hy’la! Spock internally screamed. What? How? 

Spock narrowed his eyes and moved back to the captain’s chair, “Security, this is the captain. There are intruders in the engineering deck.  Bring them to me…set phasers to stun.”


The security officers ushered Jim and the other man onto the bridge where Spock immediately moved towards them. 

“Hey, I’m back,” Jim said to Spock.  “Bet that makes you angry.”

Spock narrowed his eyes at his mate before looking to man, “Who are you?”

“This is Scotty. He’s with me,” Jim told him.

Spock snapped his gaze to Jim. “We are traveling at warp; how did you manage to beam aboard this ship?”

Jim shrugged, “You’re the genius, you figure it out.”

“I am Acting Captain of this vessel, I order you to tell me.”

“Nope. Sorry. I’m not telling. Acting Captain.”

Spock gritted his teeth at that.

Jim smiled and said, “Now that doesn’t frustrate you, does it? My lack of cooperation? That doesn’t make you angry that your mate isn’t…”

“Are you a member of Starfleet?” Spock interrupted Jim and asked Scotty.

“Yeah,” Scotty replied.  “Look, can I get a towel?”

“No. Under penalty of court martial I order you explain to me how you were able to beam aboard this ship while moving at warp.”

“Don’t answer him,” Jim said to Scotty.

“You will answer me,” Spock ordered.

Scotty looked around the bridge and then between the two husbands, “Um…I’m rather not take sides.”

Spock nodded before saying to the security officers to escort them to the brig.

“What is it about you, Spock?  Your planet was just destroyed? You’re not even upset. You’re an endangered species.  Hell, I could’ve died during that freefall earlier and you didn’t so much as blink an eye. I mean the hug was nice, but that was it. You’ve shut me out, Spock.”

“If you are presuming that these experiences in any way interfere with my ability to command this ship you are mistaken.”

Jim forced out a laugh and then said, “And yet fear is necessary for command, isn’t it?  I mean…did you see Nero’s huge ship? Did you see what he did?”

“Yes, of course…”

“So, are you afraid, or aren’t you?”

Spock clenched his fists and tried breaking down the barrier between their bond, “I will not allow you to lecture me about the merits of emotion.”

Jim stepped closer to his mate, “Merits of emotion? So, I am merely a merit? Do you feel nothing for me? Am I just this t’hy’la person that you had to bond with?”

“That is not…step away from me Mr. Kirk.”

“Mr. Kirk, huh? Not t’hy’la or ashayam?  What is it like? Not to feel? Anger or heartbreak or the need to stop at nothing to avenge the destruction of your home!”

“Back away.”

Why is my mate doing this? Jim, step control...please

“You feel nothing! It must not even compute for you! I’m nothing to you, aren’t I?! Our marriage, bonding? Nothing! Spock, Nero is heading for Earth! Your mother was seriously injured when Vulcan was being destroyed!  What if I had died, Spock? What about your mother? You feel nothing about us so you don’t care. You don’t love us!”

“THAT’S NOT TRUE!” Spock roared before grabbing Jim and then pinning him to one of the consoles. “I feel very deeply, you infuriating mate of mine!” Spock gripped Jim’s upper arms and kept him pinned as he continued yelling, “I love you and I love my mother! I am trying to keep you safe!”

“By what? I almost got eaten on Delta Vega!” Jim yelled back, trying to struggle out of Spock’s grip. “Nero is on his way to Earth and you want to waste time and regroup! It’ll be all your fault when Earth is destroyed. You can’t keep us safe! You threw me away at the first chance you got and now you’re doing that again with Earth and will everyone else’s families there.”

Spock gripped Jim’s arms tighter. His face green and his eyes heated, distraught and watering.

“Spock,” a voice came from behind him. His mother. “Spock, kan-bu, let Jim go.”

Spock shook his head like a petulant child, still keeping his mate pinned.  Jim glanced to Amanda before looking back to his mate.

“Spock,” He said softly.

Spock pulled Jim to him and held him tightly in his arms. He let his shields break down and basked in feeling Jim around him.

I cannot lose you, t’hy’la.

You’re not, Spock. Jim felt everything that Spock was feeling.  Anger, hurt, anxiety, nervousness…love and fear…so much fear.  Fear of losing everything…Jim, his parents, his second home Earth.

“Spock,” Jim said quietly.  “You’re hurting me.”

Spock slowly released his mate and backed up.  He straightened himself and looked around the bridge.  Everyone was eyeing him, stunned.  Spock looked to his mother and father and then glanced away to Bones and put on a face of professionalism.

“Doctor, I am no longer fit for duty.  I hereby relinquish my command on the grounds that I have been…emotionally compromised.  Please note the time and date in the ship’s log,” Spock said before quickly walking off the bridge. Sarek following right after.


Sarek found his son sitting alone on the observation deck.  Spock glanced to him before staring out of the window. Sarek took a seat next to him and waited to see if Spock would start talking first.

He didn’t.

“You must not punish yourself, Spock,” Sarek said.  “Speak your mind.”

“I feel conflicted.  I wanted Jim, my t’hy’la, to be safe. I wanted him off the ship. I shut down as soon as I heard that there was a distress call from Vulcan.”

“You love your mate.  It is logical to want him to be safe.  We feel very deeply for those we love and our humans sometimes do not realize it.”

“Jim is…illogical.”

“He is, but in this moment, he is the best choice for captaining this ship.”

Spock looked to his father with a raised eyebrow.

“I have no doubt that under other circumstances that you would be an exceptionally captain, Spock.”

Spock nodded, “Jim has been right from the beginning.  I was…foolish.”

“Go meditate and then rejoin your mate on the bridge.  He still needs you.”

Spock stood and went to leave but Sarek reached a hand out and grabbed Spock’s arm.  Spock turned to his father with a raised brow.

“You will always be a child of two worlds.  I am grateful for that. And for you,” Sarek told him.  “You asked me once. Why I married your mother. I married her because I loved her.”

Sarek released Spock and then walked past him and out of the observation deck. Spock heard some approach a moment later and figured it was his mother but instead saw Jim standing there.  Spock looked away from his mate.  He was ashamed for grabbing him earlier in anger.

“Stop shutting me out,” Jim said, coming up to him.  Jim stood in front of Spock and reached out to him.  He placed his hand on the nape of Spock’s neck and pulled him close. 

“I am in need of mediation,” Spock softly told him, resting his forehead against Jim’s. “And to grovel for forgiveness by my recent actions, ashal-veh.”

“No shit.  Spock, you know I didn’t mean anything I said on the bridge?” Jim asked as he gently rub his fingers along Spock’s hairline on his nap.

Spock closed his eyes, “I am aware that you only said those things in order to take command. It was logical.”

Jim smiled, “I know how much you love me and how much you love your mama. You are the biggest mama’s boy there is.”

“I am not,” Spock replied. “I was foolish.”

“Yeah, you were.”

Spock open his eyes and pulled back slightly to see Jim’s big grin, “You are insufferable at times, ashayam.”

“You married me knowing full well how illogical and insufferable I was.”

“I did and I would do it again, time after time.”

Jim lightly kissed his husband before pulling back, “Go meditate and then report to the bridge.  We’re trying to figure out some strategies for Nero.”

Spock nodded. “Jim, I have to ask. When you were on Delta Vega…was there someone…touching you?”

Jim blinked. “Um…no.”

“There was,” Spock narrowed his eyes and growled. He pulled him into a tight hug. “My Jim.”

“Yes, yes, I’m yours,” Jim sighed. He hugged Spock back. “We’ll talk about this later.”

“My Jim,” Spock nuzzled against Jim’s neck and held him.

Jim patted him on the back.




“Okay, Spock, I’ve gotta get back to the bridge.”

“No. My t'hy'la.”

“Yes, I’m yours, but I need…”


Jim sighed again. He saw a comm on the wall nearby and reached his hand out and pressed it. “Amanda. Amanda Grayson please report to the observation deck. Now.”

“My Jim.”

A few moments later, Amanda appeared.

“Spock, look, it’s your mama.”

Spock lifted his head from Jim’s neck. She smiled at him and held her arms out and open towards him. Spock reluctantly let go of Jim and went to his mother and hugged her.

“My ko-mekh."

She hugged him back. “Yes, I’m your mama.”

Jim smiled at the sight and started to walk away. “Spock, you need to meditate and then after all of this is said and done, we can talk.” Spock almost reached out and grabbed Jim to hold again but let the captain go.


When it was all said and done, after Nero was gone and they were safely back to Earth, Spock found out about him. His counterpart. He found him at the Vulcan embassy in the back gardens a day after they returned. Spock thought it was his father at first but it was not.

“I am Spock,” the older Vulcan said.

Spock stared at him. “Spock.”


“You touched my mate.”

His counterpart merely gave him an almost smile and chuckled slightly, “You are not pleased that I melded with James on Delta Vega.”

Spock growled. “You touched my mate.”

“Again, it was logical, young one. Growling at me does not change that.”

It makes me feel better though, Spock thought.

Spock, what are you doing? Jim asked.


“I was not going to let myself be known to you,” older Spock said. “I am old and have no desire to try and claim your mate so you do not have to growl at me.”

Spock nodded but internally he still wished to growl at older Spock more.

“Why did you not come aboard the Enterprise with Jim?  You could have explained the truth?”

“Because you needed each other. Opposing yet complimentary opposites. It is a balance between you that often make the impossible, possible. I could not deprive you if the revelation of that you could accomplish together…of a relationship that will define you both in ways you cannot yet realize.”

“I believe I have realized it…”

“Selik.  Two Spocks would get confusing.”

“Indeed.  Selik.”

“When did your mate tell you of me?”

“He did not inform me of you.  Your ship did and then I inferred that there was another because you touched what is mine. Did you tell Jim not to inform me?”

“I believe he thought that universe-ending paradoxes would ensue should he break his promise,” Selik chuckled.

Spock raised an eyebrow, “You lied to him.”

“I implied.”

Spock looked away. He saw his mother across the way, sitting and reading under a tree that she favored. She did not see them.

“She is beautiful,” Selik said.  “Slightly different than my own mother, but still radiant.”

“Does your mother still live?”

Selik’s eyes looked said. “No. In my time, she passed away peacefully in her sleep at an old age. Well, old for humans. My father has also passed.”

“And your Jim? Were you…mates?”

Selik nodded. “Yes, but we did not get together for many, many years. You and Jim are fortunate to have found each other so soon. I was…I held my human side back, I rarely let my emotions be known. I loved him, but I did not tell him that until we were almost old men. We did end up sharing many years together. Happy years before he was lost.”

“I am sorry,” Spock said. “Does it hurt?”

“It does,” Selik replied. “He was my everything. I do not go a day without thinking of him. You, though, will hopefully not lead the same path we did and your Jim will be with you for a long time.”

“I hope so.”

“Spock,” his mother called. The Spocks looked to her and found she now stood a few feet away. She smiled at them. “Look at you both.”

“Mother, this is…”

“Oh, I know who this is,” she said. She looked at Selik. “Thinks he can keep a low profile? I don’t think so.” She walked over and took Selik’s arm. “C’mon, I’ll make us some tea.”

“I do not…” Selik tried but Amanda shushed him.

“Don’t talk back. We’re going to have tea. Spock, go home to Jim.”


“And you don’t talk back either.”

Spock shut his mouth and did as his mother told him.


Two Months Later

Spock stepped off the turbo lift and straighten his blue science uniform top. Spock looked to his mate sitting in the captain’s chair and asked, “Permission to come aboard, Captain?”

Love when you call me Captain, Jim said before saying out loud, “Permission granted, Mr. Spock.”

Spock walked to Jim who stood up from his chair and looked at him. “As you have yet to select a first officer, respectfully I would like to submit my candidacy.  Should you desire, I can provide character references.”

“You already gave good references last night,” Jim whispered with a grin. “Welcome aboard, Mr. Spock.”

Spock nodded and moved to his station and sat down. He looked around at the crew—their crew on their ship and mentally smiled.

All mine.

Bones appeared on the bridge, fussing that this wasn't going to be fun. 

Spock looked at him. Not mine. 

Spock, behave, Jim told him.

“Maneuvering thrusters, Mr. Sulu,” Jim ordered.  “Also, don’t forget to disengage the external inertial dampener.”

Sulu stiffened in his chair and grumbled under his breath how he’d make Spock pay one day before nodding and double checking that he had, indeed, disengaged what he needed to. “Thrusters on standby, Captain,” Sulu responded.

“Punch it.”

Chapter Text

Age 29 Part 1

Spock woke up from a restful night’s sleep curled up in the bed’s comforter. He opened his eyes and found Jim sound asleep beside him, naked from the waist up with the sheet draped over his lower half. He laid on this side facing away from Spock. Spock smiled.

“Lower temperature five degrees,” he called out. He liked to keep it warm, Jim did not—hence Spock in the comforter for Spock and sheet for Jim.

Jim stirred a bit at the sound of his voice but didn’t wake. Through their bond, Spock could feel Jim was just on the edge of waking up. Their alarm would be going off soon.

Spock turned onto his side and softly trailed his fingertips along Jim’s broad shoulders. Jim stirred again. Spock continued to ghost his fingertips along his mate’s back.

All mine, Spock thought. His fingers stopped at where the sheet was resting against Jim’s hip. Spock didn’t hesitate to remove the sheet, revealing Jim’s lower half and that Jim was wearing a tight pair of boxer briefs.

Spock smiled and used one hand to grab a handful of one of Jim’s cheek’s. This is mine, too.

Jim moved and looked over his shoulder at Spock. It was clear he had just woken up by the cute face he was making. “Why you touching my ass?”

“It is mine,” Spock replied.

Jim stared at him before shrugged. “Okay.” Jim turned onto his back, causing Spock to remove his hand. Jim stretched and let out a yawn.

“Good morning, t’hy’la,” Spock said.

His mate smiled. “Morning. How long have you been groping me in my sleep?”

“Only a moment.”

“You’re weird, Mr. Spock.”

“I am aware.” Spock leaned over and kissed Jim’s cheek. “We have a busy day today, my love.”

Jim nodded and touched Spock’s cheek with two fingers. “Yeah. You sure you want to be the one to go into the volcano?”

“I would not allow another to do it when I am more than capable myself. Also, it is my cold fusion device.”

Jim chuckled. “Possessive much?”


Jim sat up and leaned against the headboard. “I worry, though. What if something goes wrong?”

Spock sat up as well. “You are being illogical. Everything will be alright.”

Jim smiled at him then moved and straddled Spock’s waist and wrapped his arms around Spock’s neck. “Mine,” Jim said before pressing his lips to Spock’s.


Several hours later, Spock appeared on the transporter pad and saw Jim and Bones running into the room. They were still in their wetsuits. Jim smiled at him.

“Spock! You all right?” Jim asked. Spock could feel how happy he was to see him. Happy and relieved that Spock was safe onboard their ship.

Spock raised a brow from behind the helmet he was wearing.  “Captain, you let them see our ship.”

Jim smile faltered. “Honey, you just saved the world.”

“You violated the Prime Directive,” Spock countered.

Are you kidding me? Jim said trough their bond. Spock saw Jim clenched his fists and glare at him. Jim turned on his heal and left the room.   Bones stayed behind as some crew started a decontamination spray on Spock in his suit.

“For a genius, you’re a real idiot, Spock,” Bones grumbled.

“Doctor, the Prime Dire…”

“Spock, you were about to die! What was Jim supposed to do, huh?  Leave your ass in that damn volcano? Jim needs you. He had a chance to save you but you said ‘no’? I know you love him but god dammit, Spock, act like it for once!”

Spock kept silent. Bones shook his head at Spock then turned and left.


Spock knew he had made a mistake.  He meditated on the observation deck for several hours. Doctor McCoy’s words had hit him hard.  He did love Jim very much.  He checked on his bond with Jim and found his mate was blocking him this time; anger and sorrow was throbbing at him from Jim’s end.

Spock stood up from the floor and left the observation deck.  He saw Uhura on his way to his quarters. The lieutenant gave him a look similar to how Jim had glared at him earlier.  She turned away from him and went down another hall before Spock could stop her and say something.

My friend is mad at me, Spock internally sighed. My friend is mad as is my mate.

Spock continued on to his quarters.  He stopped at his door and tried to enter but it was locked.  He tried again using another access code but was still denied entry.  He then knocked and waited, but the door stayed closed.  Spock knocked harder on the door and was pleased when it slid open to reveal Jim standing in the doorway, blocking Spock’s entry into their quarters.

“Yes?” Jim asked in a flat tone.

Spock arched a brow. “You are still displeased with me.”

“No shit, Spock.”

Spock took a step closer to his mate. “Jim, I made a mistake.” Spock’s heart constricted in his side. “In the volcano, I had resigned to the fact that I was to die. I thought of you and my parents.” Spock looked to his mate and met Jim’s bright blue eyes that held how distressed he was.  Spock sent as much love as he could to his mate and watched Jim blink back tears and look away. 

“Spock, you wanted to die…”

“I did not want to die,” Spock interrupted. 

“Well you didn’t care about what it would do to me. Or to your parents. You say you thought about them, about me, but you shut down our bond again. Like you did last year with Nero.”

“I admit to shutting you out; to shielding from you and choosing not to feel how I was hurting you.  I did not want my last moments to be emotionally compromising…they were, though.  I thought of you. I remembered the two of us from this morning. We knew what we were going to do…to save the Nibirans. We lounged in bed together, basking in each other and enjoying a lazy start to our day. I may have shut the bond down between us but I still felt so much at the thought of not being able be by your side anymore.”

Jim sniffled as Spock continued, “I wanted you to be safe, Jim. I always want you to be safe, even at the cost of my own safety. There was a 25.63% chance I could have died while you violated the Prime Directive trying to rescue me. Consequently, you would have been kicked out of Starfleet or possibly court marshalled.”

“I don’t care about any of that Spock! I need you.” His eyes were holding back tears.


Jim shook his head. “Spock, I just need you.  How could I live with the fact that I had a chance to save you and didn’t? What am I supposed to tell your parents?  They’d resent me and blame me…” Jim trailed off as Spock pulled him in a tight embrace. Spock held him as Jim started sobbing quietly, evidenced only by the slight shake of his shoulders. “I just need you. Even if we were both kicked out of Starfleet, I wouldn’t care because I’d still have you.”

Spock tried to soothe his mate.  “Neither of us will be kicked out of Starfleet as I was successfully rescued. I owe you a series of apologies for making you feel such a way.  I regret that I hurt my t’hy’la. Hurting you hurts me so much, ashayam.”

Jim sniffled and hugged Spock back, nuzzling the Vulcan’s neck.  “We’re not very good with all this emotion stuff are we?”

“I believe that I fail in this aspect more than you do.”

Jim smiled into Spock’s neck. “Yeah, well, you are an emotionless robot.”

Spock reached a hand down Jim’s back to his ass and gave it a light slap in response. Jim laughed and pulled back from Spock’s embrace slightly to looking into Spock’s brown eyes.

“You do realize that we’re codependent with one another, right.”

“Our codependency is logical.”. 

“I love you.”

“And I cherish you.”

“I would break the Prime Directive a thousand times if it meant saving you.”

“I…admit that I would most likely do the same.”

Jim then grinned and stepped closer to Spock so their hips were flush together. “You know what?  We’ve had a fight.”

“It was more of a…”


“Yes, we had a fight,” Spock then agreed.

“So…make-up sex would be the next logical step, right?”


Jim kissed his mate and pulled him into their quarters. Spock had a lot of making up to do. 


A week later, Jim smiled and cooed at Demora Sulu. The six-month-old was bouncing happily in a bouncer seat in the Sulu’s apartment. Hikaru and Ben had invited Jim and Spock over for lunch which had been delicious.

“She’s a cutie, you guys,” Jim said.

“That she is,” Sulu agreed.

“Can’t believe someone on my crew has a baby,” Jim said, moving away from Demora to sit next to Spock on the couch.

“Leonard has a daughter,” Ben replied.

“Yeah, but she’s like six. Still a cutie but not a little thing like Demora.”

Demora made a cooing noise which Jim smiled at.

“Ain’t she a cutie, Spock?” Jim asked his mate.

Spock eyed the baby then nodded. I suppose. She is drooling. “Affirmative.”

“Do you like kids, Spock?” Sulu asked. “You can hold her if you want?”

Spock shook his head. “Kids are…I do like them but no thank you. I do not wish to hold her.” Also the drooling.

“I’ll hold her.” Jim moved back to the girl and picked up from her the bouncy seat. He sat back down next to Spock and held her in his lap. Spock looked at his mate holding the child. It was a pleasing sight.

“Perhaps we should have one,” Spock blurted out.

Jim stared at his mate as Ben and Sulu chuckled nearby.


Spock blinked. “I mean…one day. Someday. We should have one. Or two.”

Jim looked to Ben and Sulu. The three of them started to laugh. Demora gave a little giggle with them.

What is humorous?

You, Spockums.

Spock shook his head.

Jim smiled at him. “Yes, someday we’ll have one or two. But not for many, many years.”

“We can recommend a great surrogacy company when you two are ready. In the meantime, though,” Hikaru spoke up. “You can always babysit.”

Babysit? He remembered babysitting Joanna a few years previous. She was a cute girl but…that had been a trying experience for Spock—both mentally and physically. Spock stood up and carefully picked up Demora. He walked the two feet over to the Sulus and handed Demora to Hikaru. “No thank you. This is yours.”

Jim shook his head and shrugged at their friends. “He’s weird.”

“I know,” Hikaru replied. “We couldn’t even be roommates back at the Academy.”

Spock sat back down next to Jim. “You engaged in coitus on my bed.”

“We were just making out.”

“You were undressed.”

“Spock, let it go,” Jim said. He took Spock’s hand in his. “It was what? Eight years ago?”

“Yes, it was,” Ben agreed. “Hikaru needs to let go of it, too. We’re sorry, Spock. We were caught up in the moment and landed on the first bed we came to.”

Spock nodded. It was still my bed.

Spock, do you want to sleep on the couch tonight?


“The coffee…” Hikaru tried.

Ben shushed him then gave him a kiss on the cheek.

“Our husbands are something, huh?” Jim asked Ben teasingly.

Ben nodded. “Yes, they are.”

I am something what? That does not make sense, Jim, Spock questioned his mate.

It makes sense to me and Ben so…Jim mentally blew a raspberry at his mate.

Spock and Hikaru exchanged an exasperated look.


The next day, Jim and Spock were walking across Starfleet headquarters campus on their way to a meeting with Pike. They were dressed in their black formal uniforms. 

“It’s going to be a five-year mission,” Jim said excitedly, almost bouncing next to his mate as they walked. “That’s why Pike called. Deep space, Spock. Uncharted territory!”

Spock nodded. “A five-year mission has never been attempted but I feel with you leading our crew, we would have successful one.”

“We so would. A five-year mission!”  Jim looked to his mate and turned as they walked and walked backwards. “You look cute in your hat by the way.”

Spock preened at that, giving his mate a small smile. “Thank you.”

Jim stopped walking and held his fingers out to Spock. They kissed in the Vulcan fashion before they continued on.

“I asked Nyota to join me for tea later,” Spock said as they entered the building.


“She declined. Said she was busy.”

Jim looked at him. “Have you apologized yet for the volcano incident? She’s just as mad at you as I was.”

“I have tried but she does not wish to spend time with me to do so.”

Jim stopped at a set of elevators. He turned to his mate. “Try again for tea or lunch and maybe give her an ‘I’m sorry present’.”

“An I’m sorry present?” Spock asked with a raised brow.

Jim nodded. “Yeah, like when I screw up and need to apologize, what do I do?”

“When you ran through the flowers on Filenza III after I told you not too and you had a severe allergic reaction, you gave me a lap dance.”

Jim grinned. “First of all, some giant spider thing was chasing me and second of all, do not give Uhura a lap dance.”

“I would never.”

Jim pressed the button for the elevator. “How about that necklace you bought? The volkaya one?”

Spock considered it and then nodded. “I believe she would like such a present.”


Several minutes later Jim and Spock stood at attention in front of Pike’s desk. They waited quietly as Pike sat in his chair and looked over a file.

“Uneventful,” Pike then said.

Jim raised a brow in confusion as Pike continued, “It’s the way you described the survey of Nibiru in your captain’s log.”

Jim internally sighed. “Yes, sir.  It was uneventful and I didn’t want to waste your or Starfleet’s time going over the details.”

Pike nodded, looking to Jim. “What about this volcano? Wasn’t it highly volatile? Could wipe out the planet if it were to erupt?”

Oh no, Spock thought. He glanced to his mate who glanced back at him.

Spock? Why ‘oh no’?

Spock looked away and gripped his hat tightly at his side.  Jim then looked back to Pike who was waiting for his response.

“Let’s hope it doesn’t erupt then, sir.” Jim then said. Spock saw Jim glance at him again. No doubt feeling Spock’s uneasiness. 

Spock, you alright? Jim asked through their bond.

“Something tells me it won’t,” Pike then said, sitting up straight in his seat.

Spock looked down to the floor. Jim, what did you put in your report?

I said it was uneventful. Why? Oh god, Spock, what did you write?

Spock shook his head and spoke up, “I take full responsibility for the mission, Admiral.”

“I know you do, Mr. Spock. I read your full report explaining about the cold fusion device and that it was your fault that Jim had the Nibirans, a civilization that has barely invented the wheel, see a starship rising out of their ocean.”

Jim looked to Spock, “You filed a report? Why didn’t you tell me?”

Spock met his gaze, his eyes apologetic. “I incorrectly assumed that you would be truthful in your captain’s log. I took full…”

“I would’ve been truthful if I didn’t have to save my mate’s ass.”

“And I am grateful that you did, you know I am. Captain, Jim, I took responsibility for all subsequent actions due to your motivations to save me.”

“Yeah and now you’re throwing me under the bus, Pointy.”

“Name-calling is illogical. I am willing to accept all consequences, thus my report’s contents.”

Jim opened his mouth to continue arguing but Pike had enough and stood up from his desk.

“I don’t need a lover’s quarrel in my office, Gentlemen,” Pike said.  “Starfleet’s mandate is to explore and observe, not to interfere.”

“Had the mission gone according to plan, Admiral, the Nibirans would never have known of our interference.”

“Spock, enough,” Pike said sternly. “That’s a technicality.”

“I am Vulcan, sir. We embrace technicality.”

“Are you giving me attitude, Mr. Spock.”

“To what attitude are you referring to?” Spock said.  “I am expressing multiple attitudes simultaneously. Admiral, I am merely expressing my wish to take respons…”

“Out,” Pike interrupted.


"Dismissed, Commander.  Wait outside while I have words with Captain Kirk.”

Spock faltered for a moment, glancing from Pike to Jim before nodding his head and leaving. He took a seat just outside the office and waited. He did not mean for any of this to happen. He thought Jim would be truthful in his report which was why Spock filed his own, to take the blame from his mate.

Jim, I am sorry, Spock told him.

We’re demoted Spock, Jim replied after several moments of silence.

Spock hung his head. He usually wasn’t one for cursing but he couldn’t help the ‘fuck’ that escaped his lips.

A little while later the doors open and Spock stood up. He tried to follow his mate, “Jim, please…” but Pike called Spock back into the office.  Spock clenched his fists and watched the retreating back of his beloved and knew the situation has extended beyond his control. He turned and walked back into Pike’s office and stood at attention before the admiral that his mate saw as a father figure.

“Are you done with the attitudes, Spock?” Pike asked.

“Yes, Sir. I again wish to apologize.”

“Apologize for what, Spock? What exactly did you do wrong?”

“If I was not in the volcano then Jim would not have needed to violate the Prime Directive. I had built the cold fusion device. The volcano was volatile as you said. We did not want an entire civilization to be wiped out.”

“But what if, in the grand scheme of things, that civilization was supposed to be wiped out, Spock?”

Spock looked down.

Pike stood up and approached him. “Spock, I know you love Jim. Hell, I was there when you two got hitched. Jim’s crazy about you. But when you two are on that ship, in your uniforms, you are more than husbands. You are Starfleet officers. Captain and Commander. You both have duties—the ship, your crew, it comes before you both.”

Spock lifted his head and made eye contact with Pike. “I understand but I know Jim, and he would have done the same thing to protect anyone else on the ship.”

Pike sighed. “I know. Spock, you cannot keep protecting Jim from his own actions. He filed a false report. I know Jim too, I knew full well that it was bull even before I read your report.”

Spock nodded. “We have been demoted.”

“Yes. Admiral Marcus wanted you both off the same ship but we cannot separate bonded pairs. He wanted Jim back at the Academy.  That’s what he was going to order, but I convinced him otherwise. Jim has been demoted to Commander while I take over command of the Enterprise.  You have been demoted as well and will serve only as Chief Science Officer while Jim’s First Officer.”


“Spock, Jim doesn’t respect the chair. He’s not ready for it. In time, he’ll earn it back.”

Spock reluctantly nodded. He was not happy with this Admiral Marcus at all.


Spock went back home and waited. Jim was upset and, while he wasn’t blocking their bond, he wasn’t talking to Spock. He knew Jim had been home. His uniform was laying on their bed. So, Spock busied himself around the apartment, doing laundry, cleaning, and even meditating.

After a few hours, Jim finally contacted him. Was at a bar.

Do you need me to come get you?

No, I’m fine. Didn’t really drink anything. Pike is here. We talked. Well, we need to report to Starfleet Command. Something has happened. There’s a meeting. Can you bring me my uniform?

Yes, ashayam, Spock replied. I shall meet you there.


Spock met Jim at headquarters and stood in a bathroom and watched Jim put on his uniform.

“When we have the time, I wish to talk,” Spock said.

Jim finished dressing and nodded. “Yeah, me too.” They walked out of the bathroom and heading towards the elevator. When they were inside, Spock stood facing him in the elevator while Jim faced the door. “Jim.”

“Now is not the time.”

“Jim, you have stated on multiple occasions how it hurts you when I close off the bond and shut you out.  You are now doing the same to me.”

Jim closed his eyes. “I’m not shutting you out, Spock. I just…I’m upset.”

“And I apol…”

“No, I’m more upset with myself than you, Spock.” Jim opened his eyes as the elevator doors opened.  He glanced to Spock and inclined his head for him to follow.  Jim walked them over to an area by the door, out of the way from the shuffling of Starfleet personal rushing about.

“Spock, I saved your life, you wrote a report without telling me, and I lost our ship.”

Spock looked down and nodded. “It was not my intention…”

“I know, Spock. You meant well, but…why you didn’t tell me?”

“Why did you not tell me you would be lying on your report.”

Jim shrugged. “I don’t know. I thought…they wouldn’t find out. I shouldn’t have lied. Pike…Pike said a lot to me.”

Spock could feel Jim’s sadness, his disappointment in himself and for letting Pike down. Spock closed the gap between them and hugged his mate.

“Everything will be alright, ashal-veh. We will still be together on the Enterprise.”

Jim hugged him back and nodded against his shoulder.

“Kirk, let’s go,” they heard Pike call to him.

They separated and Jim gave Spock a smile and a pat on the shoulder before walking around him and entering the conference room. Spock walked over to a secluded corner and sat down, waiting for the meeting to conclude.


As soon as Spock heard his mate call for him, explosions and loud noises rattled the building.

T’hy’la!  Spock thought before standing and rushing towards the room. Starfleet personnel were in a panic all around.  He burst into the room and paused momentarily at seeing a jumpship hovering outside the building, firing into the room.

Spock! You here?


I’ll try and get the ship away.  Help inside the room!

Affirmative, Spock replied before rushing into the room.


Spock managed to drag a few officers out of the room who were hurt before running back in the room, ducking from the firing.  He found Pike on the floor, barely conscious and picked him up.  He rushed out of the room and gently laid the man on the ground and looked him over.

Pike was bleeding from his mouth and from a nasty wound in his side. The man’s face was scrunched up in pain.  Spock heard the firing stop as he reached to Pike’s meld points to help ease the man’s pain.  He was bombarded with feelings he had not experienced since his home planet was destroyed.  Spock closed his eyes and pushed that away, trying to help Pike’s pain.  He opened his eyes as he felt the man starting to slip away.  Spock turned his head and saw medics storming in the area.  He removed his hand, slowly breaking the meld, and waved over several of the medics just as Jim came towards them. 

Through their bond, Spock felt his mate’s sudden anger and heartbreak. He stood up and as Jim stepped forward.

“Jim, he will not…” Spock tried to say but Jim shook his head and tried getting to Pike but Spock held him back. “Jim…”

“No! He…he can’t…” Jim tried but started choking up as the medics placed Pike onto a stretcher and started carrying him away.  Jim saw both medics looking gloomy and shaking their heads.  Jim clenched his fists into Spock’s uniform then broke down while his husband held him tight.


Pike was gone. Bones called and confirmed it not too long after Jim and Spock returned to their apartment. They had stayed behind, helped with cleaning up and a debriefing with those who survived.

Spock had watched his mate shrugged off his gray top, tossing it onto the floor before trudging into the bedroom and plopping down onto their bed. Spock picked up the jacket and sat it on the dresser. He joined his mate in bed, cuddling up behind him and holding him close.

Jim started to shake and soon started to cry. The emotional transference from their bond caused tears to fall from Spock’s eyes.


Spock sniffled. “I do not know, ashayam.”

Spock held his mate as Jim cried himself to sleep. Spock wished Harrison would reappear so he could hurt him for killing his Admiral Pike and causing his mate distress.


The next day, after talking with Scotty about Harrison and figuring out where the fugitive had gone, Marcus reinstated their commission and okayed their mission to Qo'noS.

“Jim, I do not like this,” Spock said a little while later as he followed his mate onboard a shuttle to the Enterprise. Bones had tried to do a medical exam on Jim which Spock supported but Jim had refused.

“You’ve said that a dozen times already, Spock.”

“You need…” Bones tried but Jim interrupted.

“I’m fine,” Jim told his friend for the third time. Jim took a seat and Spock sat down next to him. “Status report, Mr. Spock.”

“Our ship should be ready to launch by the time we arrive,” Spock told his mate as Bones walked by Jim to a seat behind them.  Spock looked to the doctor and arched a brow.  Bones shrugged then started running a tricorder over Jim through the space between the seats.

“Thank you for requesting my reinstatement, Captain,” Spock added.

Jim gave his mate a smile. “Can’t leave the best first officer in the fleet behind, now can I?”

“No, you cannot. And as I am now your first officer again, it is my duty to object to our mission parameters.”

Jim huffed, “Of course.”

“Captain, there is no Starfleet regulation that condemns a man to die without a trial.  You and Admiral Marcus seem to be forgetting that.  Also, firing torpedoes at the Klingon home world goes against…”

“Spock, you said the area was uninhabited,” Jim interrupted. “Only one casualty and our orders have nothing to do with Starfleet regulation.”

Bones paused in evaluating Jim and looked between his friends. “Wait wait wait…we’re firing torpedoes at the Klingons?”

Spock ignored the doctor and continued talking to Jim. “Regulations aside, Captain, this action is morally wrong.”

“I pulled your ass out of a volcano which was morally right and I didn’t win anything for that,” Jim snapped.

“Jim, calm down,” Bones said, noticing Jim’s vitals were acting up.

“I’m not going to take ethics lessons from a robot,” Jim continued.

“You are name-calling which suggests you are defensive and find my opinion valid. Also, you have already forgiven me so…”

 “Spock, I wasn’t asking for any opinion,” Jim said before feeling Bones stick something on his face. 

You also know I am not a robot, t’hy’la. Please, you know this mission…

“Bones get that thing off my face,” Jim said. Bones looked away and pulled the thing off Jim’s face.

“Captain, Jim,” Spock tried again. “This mission could start a war with the Klingons and it is immoral.  Perhaps you should take some time to come to this conclusion yourself.”

Jim internally groaned and went to reply to Spock when he heard a woman’s voice say, “Captain Kirk.”

Jim looked from Spock to see a pretty blonde woman standing before him in Starfleet attire. She smiled at him and held out a PADD.

Who is this? Spock thought, eyeing the woman.

“Science Officer Wallace, sir.  I have been reassigned to the Enterprise by Admiral Marcus.  Here are my transfer orders,” the woman said, smiling at Jim.  Spock narrowed his eyes and looked to his mate.

“You requested another science officer?” Spock asked. Why, Jim? I am the science office. Me. Not her. Who is she?

“I didn’t but I wish I had,” Jim retorted, taking the PADD and reading it over. “Lieutenant Carol Wallace…”

Spock gripped his arms rests as Jim read the officer’s credentials. Carol. I do not like his…Carol.

Spock, calm down. “Impressive credentials,” Jim said, nodding.

“They are redundant now that I am aboard,” Spock nearly growled. I am the science officer. Not her.

Jim smiled wryly at Spock, knowing his mate was getting jealous. “More the merrier, Spock.” Jim then turned to Carol. “Have a seat, Doctor.”

More is not merrier, Spock thought.

Carol smiled back at Jim and went to sit in the vacant seat next to Spock but Spock quickly put his PADD in that seat.

“It is occupied,” Spock growled. Carol startled back, her eyes wide as Jim looked to Spock in shock.

“You don’t growl at people like that, Spock,” Jim said.

“Lieutenant Wallace, perhaps it would be best to sit elsewhere,” Spock said to Carol, ignoring Jim.

Carol nodded as Jim kept staring at his mate.  Carol moved behind them and sat next to Bones.

“He does that to everyone,” Bones told her. 

She smiled and nodded.

Spock glanced to her sitting behind Jim and narrowed his eyes.  She blinked and looked away.

Jim is mine, Spock thought before facing forward and taking Jim’s hand in his.

“Really, Spock?”


Jim sighed and tried to get his Vulcan husband to release his hand but gave up after a few moments.


Spock had to release Jim’s hand when they exited the shuttle onto the Enterprise. His mate was upset with his possessiveness and was fuming. Spock let his hand go and walked with him over to where Scotty was fussing about torpedoes.

Spock tried to speak and agree with Scotty’s apprehension but Jim immediately ordered that he report to the bridge. 

Spock nodded then turned on his heel and walked away. He went to their quarters and made sure they duffle bags were they before changing into his uniform. He knew he should go to the bridge. His captain had ordered it but Spock did not. He sat down on the couch they had. While he waited, he looked up Carol Wallace on his PADD. He was surprised at what he found and planned to investigate as soon as he could.

When Jim showed up, he sighed when he saw Spock on the couch. He walked past him into the bedroom to change. He returned shortly, dressed in his command gold uniform.

Spock stood and face him.

“Scotty resigned,” Jim said sadly. “He wouldn’t sign for the torpedoes.”

Spock stepped closer. “I do not blame him.”

Jim looked up. His blue eyes holding so much emotion.

“Jim, I know you do not wish to hear this, but this is not right. The torpedoes, Harrison, Qo'noS. I know you are distressed about Pike’s death, but Jim, you need to think. Something is not right and it feels as if…”

“We’re a pawn in something,” Jim finished. “I know, Spock. Fuck, I know. But…Harrison needs to be brought to justice.”

“Yes. Justice. Not a death sentence on Qo'noS.”

Jim nodded and leaned into Spock. Spock wrapped his arms around his mate and held him. Jim held him back.

“Yes, I’m distressed. Don’t tell Bones, though.”

“I shall endeavor not to.”

Jim kissed his neck. “I’m going to walk to the bridge by myself. I need to think.”

“Understood.” Spock let him go. “I shall meet you on the bridge, Captain.”


Jim didn’t take too long to arrive on the bridge. Spock stood by his chair, waiting dutifully. The turbolift doors opened and out walked Jim and Uhura. Uhura gave him a look and continued to her station.

Did you two speak about me? Spock asked.

Yeah and you need to guard your bangs around her.


Jim smiled at him before walking over to Chekov. “Ensign Chekov,” Jim said, leaning down next to the Russian’s chair. “You’ve been shadowing Scotty around in engineering, right?”

“Yes, Keptin,” Chekov smiled at him. “I have been learning a lot.”

“That’s good, because I’m promoting you to chief engineer.”

“Captain,” Spock tried but Jim waved him off though so Spock shut up but mentally poked his mate instead.   

“Keptin, where is Mister Scott?” Chekov asked a little hesitantly.

“Resigned, so go put on a red shirt and make sure my ship is ready to go.”

“Yes, Keptin.”


When they were at warp and onto their destination, Jim opened a ship wide communication. Spock turned in his chair and watched his mate. Jim closed his eyes for a moment and Spock could feel in the back of his mind, Jim’s own mind and that his mate was gathering his thoughts. Spock sent him love and encouragement which earned a mental caress from his mate.

“Attention crew of the Enterprise. As most of you know, former captain of this ship and our friend, Christopher Pike, was killed in an attack at Starfleet Headquarters. John Harrison, the man responsible, has fled our system and taken refuge in the Ketha Province on the Klingon home world. We are on our way there now and it is crucial that our presence go undetected. Admiral Marcus has made it clear that tensions between the Federation and the Klingons are high and that any provocation could lead to an all-out war.”

Jim paused there.  He glanced back to his mate.  Spock stared back and gave him a little nod. Jim faced forward.

Why are you always right about things? Jim asked him.

Because I am, Spock replied. But you are right about things as well.

Yeah, I am, aren’t I? But you know, nows not the time. Jim continued talking, “For this mission, I will personally lead a landing party to an abandoned city on the surface of Qo'noS where we will capture the sonofabitch fugitive and return him to Earth so he can face judgement for his actions.  Kirk out.”

Spock sent a sliver of how pleased he was that his mate was choosing to do the right thing through their bond.  Spock then stood and walked to his mate’s chair and looked down at him.

“Captain, I believe you have made the right decision,” Spock said.

Jim looked up to him and gave him a small, sincere smile. “Yeah, well, I can only take so much of your sad puppy dog look.”

“I do not have such a look. Anyway, Captain, if I can be of assistance, I would be happy to accompany you on the away team.”

Jim nodded. “I’d like that.  You and Uhura will come with me along with a couple security officers.”

“Of course. May I be excused from the bridge to check on Mr. Chekov in engineering?”

“Yes, please do that.  Make sure he doesn’t break our ship.”

Spock reached a hand down to Jim’s and lightly ran two fingers along the back of Jim’s hand before turning and leaving the bridge.  He headed right down to engineering but bypassed the location Chekov would be to come stand behind Lieutenant Wallace as she looked over the torpedoes.

He arched a brow when she turned and jumped at seeing him. 

She smiled at him. “Mr. Spock, you startled me.”

“What are you doing, Doctor?” Spock asked, holding back a growl.

Carol kept her smile as she indicated the torpedo next to her. “I am verifying that the torpedo’s internal…”

“No,” Spock interrupted. “You misunderstand.” Spock stepped closer to the blonde woman. “What are you doing aboard this ship?”

“I am…”

“There is no record of you being assigned to the Enterprise,” Spock interrupted again.

Carol’s smile faltered. “Really? That must be some sort of mistake, Commander.”

“My conclusion as well…Doctor Marcus.”

Carol’s smile completely faded and she looked to Spock in slight shock and confusion. “You just called me Doctor Marcus.”

“I did because that is your name. Carol Marcus.  You have lied about your identity. Wallace is your mother’s surname so it is logical to assume that Admiral Marcus is your father.”

Carol stepped closer to Spock and looked up to him, her eyes pleading with him. “Mr. Spock, I am aware that I have no right to ask this of you, but please…he cannot know that I’m here.”

Spock thought of all the reasons he should tell her ‘no’, but his primal Vulcan inside him took over.  He nodded then said, “As long as you are clear that the Captain is mine, then I will keep my mouth shut on your parentage and your lying to get aboard this ship.”

Carol blinked then lightly chuckled. “Mr. Spock, everyone in Starfleet knows that you and Captain Kirk are married.”

“I am aware, but I still wish to hear that you will not try and seduce him.”

Carol’s eyes went wide. “Pardon?”

“Jim is mine,” Spock said.

Carol went to reply but stopped when the ship jerked, throwing him and Carol down to the floor.


The ship was somehow broken and they were stranded in enemy space. While Chekov started to work on a fix, plans were made and soon Spock was following his mate to the shuttle bay after they had changed into new clothes. Bones had followed and started speaking with illogical metaphors about how leaving Sulu in charge was like sitting him down at a high stakes poker game with no cards. Spock found his metaphors interesting.

“Bones, enough,” Jim said.

 Bones sighed and jabbed Jim with a hypo.

“Ow! What the hell was that for?” 

“I’m your doctor, I don’t a reason to jab you for hypos,” Bones replied.

He is correct, Spock thought.

You’re supposed to be on my side, Jim replied, rubbing his neck.

Bones turned and walked away. Jim shook his head and they returned to the walk to Mudd’s shuttle. 


When the ship was entering the Klingon homeworld’s atmosphere, Spock picked up a life sign in the Ketha Province.

“Captain, given the information provided by Mr. Scott, I believe this is Harrison,” Spock said, glancing to his mate and seeing him nod.

Jim pressed a button and comm’d Sulu. “I think we found him, Sulu.  Let him know you mean business.”

“Aye, Captain,” Sulu’s voice came back. They then listened to Sulu’s threat to Harrison which amused Spock and company.   

“He’ll make a good captain one day,” Jim commented.

“Who would be his first officer?” Uhura asked.

Jim chuckled. “Some plant most likely.”

Spock listened to his mate and friend laugh before he chimed in. “As a plant is not…” He stopped when he felt Jim and Uhura turn and look to him.  He turned his head and saw Jim looked slightly amused at whatever logical thing Spock was about to say but Uhura did not appear amused.

She is mad, he thought as he focused on his console.

Make it up to her. Do you have the necklace?

In my pocket.



After a few minutes, Spock spoke up. “We will arrive at Harrison’s location in three minutes, Captain. I believe it is unlikely that he will come willingly. The odds of him attempting to kill us is at 91.6%.”

“Well, it’s a good thing you don’t care about dying,” Uhura muttered but Jim and Spock heard.

Spock looked down to his lap, expecting Jim to agree with her but instead Jim groaned. Spock looked to his mate.

“Spock, don’t you have something to say to Uhura?” Jim said.

Spock allowed a brief pause before beginning his explanation and apology. “I do care, Uhura, very deeply.  My reasons for wishing to stay in the volcano and blocking out Jim was to protect my mate. I could have died during the attempt to rescue me and I did not wish for Jim to bare the pain of not being able to save me and to be punished for violating the Prime Directive.” He turned his head to look at his friend. “If I caused you any unnecessary anger or sadness at my decisions, then I apologize, Nyota.  I value your friendship and I do not wish to lose it, but the safety and welfare of my mate come before my own.”

“I accept your apology, Spock. I understand how important Jim is to you,” Uhura told the Vulcan.  She then looked to Jim.

“I have a gift for you that…” Spock trailed off as a Klingon warbird appeared.


Jim set the ship down after an intense chase with the warbird led them into three more warbirds.  He wanted to try and overtake them but Uhura told him to let her speak Klingon. 

Jim agreed and opened the back hatch for her to step out.  He, Spock, and the lieutenants stayed in the ship and watch Uhura walk confidently towards the group of Klingons.

“This isn’t going to work,” Jim said as they watched Uhura start talking.

“Be patient,” Spock told him.

When have you known me to be patient?

Spock gave his mate a look. “It is our only logical option and there is a small chance that Uhura will convince them that we are not Starfleet and mean no harm.”

“How small of a chance?” Jim asked, glancing to his mate.

“Eight-point zero six percent.”

Jim rolled his eyes. “Great.”

“If you wish to interrupt her, you will not only incur the wrath of the Klingons but that of Lieutenant Uhura as well.”

Spock knew his mate did not like this—did not like waiting. He watched Jim grab three phasers from near the door.  He handed one to Spock and the other to one of the security officers. They focused back on Uhura and watched her and a Klingon speak for a moment.

When the Klingon grabbed Uhura by the jaw and lift her up, they all ran out firing.


After several moments of fighting, Spock had Jim and Uhura near him. He had a hand on Jim’s leg who was laying on the ground and his other hand on Uhura’s arm as she crouched next to him.

My mate is well, Spock thought. As is my friend. I will keep them safe.

Who the hell is that guy? Jim asked.

Spock grabbed a large Klingon phaser and held it as he stayed close to his mate and friend, shielding him and Uhura from any attackers or stray phaser fire that may come towards them.

The masked stranger that seemed to be helping them took out all of the Klingons before turning towards them.

Is this stranger helping us or going to kill us? Jim wondered.


After the stranger was revealed to be Harrison, the fighting stopped. Harrison asked about the torpedoes and then surrendered. Jim had accepted the surrender and then repeatedly punched Harrison until Spock had to pull him away.

They returned to the Enterprise with their prisoner, meeting several security officers in red shirts.  Cupcake and the other lieutenant handed Harrison over and then they all walked thru engineering and towards the brig. 

Jim pulled out his communicator and informed Bones to meet him in the brig as soon as could and got an affirmative back.  Jim the paused and let the security team walk on.  He turned to Uhura.

“Contact Starfleet, Lieutenant,” Jim told her. “Let them know that we have Harrison in custody and once the warp care is repaired, we’ll be on our way.”

“Yes, Sir,” Uhura replied.  Jim nodded then turned and continued walking.

Spock went to follow but Uhura stopped him.  He turned to her and arched a brow. “If you plan to lecture me about the volcano incident…”

“No, Spock,” she interrupted.  “I actually wanted to apologize for my shitty behavior to you earlier.”

“Apologies are unnecessary, Uhura. I understand you were cross with me and your behavior was justified.” Spock took a small box out of his pocket and present it to Uhura. “An apology gift.”

Uhura smiled. “You can’t just let someone say ‘I’m Sorry’, can you?”

“Perhaps not.”

She took the box and opened it. “Spock, this is…too much.”

“It is not. It is a volkaya gem from my homeworld before it was…anyway, I want you to have it.”

“And not Jim?”

“Jim is not fond of jewelry.”

She chuckled. “Of course not. Thank you, Spock. I love it.”

Spock glanced to Jim and saw his mate was standing near the turbolift watching them. 

Uhura touched Spock’s arm. “Spock, I also wanted to say that you need to keep an eye on Kirk.”

Spock nodded then looked back to his friend. “Thank you for your concern. I will, indeed, be keeping an eye on him.” He then turned and walked to his mate and entered the lift with him.


Jim entered their quarters first and went to the small kitchenette they had in the room. Spock followed. He watched his mate try to replicate coffee but Jim’s hands were shaking.

Spock gently took Jim’s hands in his and pulled his mate close.

“Sorry, I’m a mess right now,” Jim said.

“Do not apologize.” Spock touched the cuts and bruises starting to form on Jim’s hands from where he had repeatedly punched Harrison.

“Guy is strong,” Jim said. “Felt like I was punching a wall.”

“Come, I will heal them.” Spock pulled Jim along and into their bathroom. He made Jim sit down on the closed toilet seat while he looked through the cabinets. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Jim shrug out of the jacket and undershirt he was wearing.

“I wonder why he surrendered?” Jim said.

Spock found the dermal regenerator. He grabbed their first aid kit to and went to his mate. “I do not know. Perhaps Sulu scared him?”

Jim snorted. “Maybe, but Harrison…something isn’t right about him. I doubt he scares easily.”

“I doubt that as well. We will find out more soon enough.” Spock sat down on the floor in front of Jim and took his mate’s hands. Jim hissed when the cuts were disinfected. Spock kissed the back of Jim’s hand in apology before healing the cuts with the dermal regenerator.

“Why are you so good to me?” Jim asked.

“Because you are mine and I cherish thee,” Spock replied. He looked up and met Jim’s gaze. Those bright blue eyes that he adored stared back at him. “And as you are mine, I must take care of you whether you want me to or not.”

Jim let out a light laugh. “True.” Spock finished healing Jim and was about to stand up when Jim cupped his face with his hands. “I love you. I love you more than anything. You know that, right?”

Spock turned his head and kissed the palm of Jim’s right hand. “I feel your love for me everything day, all day, ashal-veh.”

A wondrous smile appeared on Jim’s face. Jim pulled Spock close and pressed their lips together in a soft kiss.

Chapter Text

Age 29 Part Two

Jim went straight to the brig with Spock following close behind him.  They walked up to Harrison’s cell and stood in front of the clear partition.  Harrison didn’t make a move to stand from where he sat; merely glancing up to them.

I wanna punch him again, Jim thought.

It would be wise to let me do it, Spock replied.

“Why are there people in those torpedoes?” Jim asked.

“I put them there.”

“Who are you?  I checked, John Harrison didn’t exist until a year ago.”

Harrison looked to Jim. “John Harrison was a fiction created the moment I was awoken by your Admiral Marcus.  My crew and I are a remnant of a time long past. Genetically engineered to be superior as to lead others to peace in a world at war.  But we were forced into exile; condemned as criminals.”

No shit, Jim and Spock both thought.

“My name is Khan,” Harrison—Khan said.

“How did Marcus find you?” Spock asked.

Khan glanced to Spock before replying, “As a result of the destruction of Vulcan, your Starfleet began to aggressively search distant quadrants of space. My ship was found adrift. I alone revived. Marcus created the name John Harrison as a smokescreen to conceal my true identity and to advance his cause.”

Jim arched a brow. “Why would Admiral Marcus revive a three-hundred-year-old frozen man to ask for help?”

“Because I am better,” Khan said matter-of-factly.

Jim kept back a snort. “Better at what?”

“Everything. Marcus wanted my mind—a warrior’s mind to design weapons and warships.”

Spock took a step closer to Jim. “To merely exploit your intellect, you are suggesting that Admiral Marcus violated every regulation he vowed to uphold.”

Khan turned his full attention to the Vulcan, standing up and stepping closer to the clear partition separating him from Jim and Spock. “No, Mr. Spock, he wanted to exploit my savagery.”


Khan smirked. “Intellect alone is useless in a fight. I’ve read your files, Mr. Spock. You can’t even break a rule so how could you be expected to break bone?”

“I have no qualms with breaking your bones, Khan,” Spock replied simply. You hurt my mate, I hurt you.

Spock, behave right now.

I find that I do not want to.

Khan looked between him and Jim before continuing, “To help him realize his vision of a militarized Starfleet, Marcus used me to design weapons. He sent you to use those weapons.”

“To take you out,” Jim said.

“No. To fire my torpedoes on an unsuspecting planet. The Klingons would come searching for whomever responsible and find your ship purposely crippled in enemy space with no chance of escape.  Marcus would finally have that war he always talked about, wouldn’t he? A war he always wanted.”

Jim shook his head. “No.  I watched you open fire in a room of unarmed Starfleet officers.  You killed them in cold blood! Marcus…”

“Marcus took my crew from me!” Khan interrupted.

“You are a murderer! You…”

“He used my friends—my family to control me!” Khan raised his voice and said before turning away. “I…I tried to get them away…to smuggle them to safety by concealing them in the very weapons I had designed.  But I was discovered so I had no choice but to escape alone.”

“That does not give you cause for what you did.” For taking Chris from me, Spock heard Jim think.

Spock watched his mate and stepped closer to stand beside him. He moved one of his hands to Jim’s and rubbed his fingers across the back of Jim’s, sending calming, loving emotions as well.

“I had every reason to suspect that Marcus had killed them…killed the people I hold most dear,” Khan told him, turning around to face Jim and Spock. He looked down to their hands for a second before snapping his gaze up. “So, I responded in kind.  My crew is my family, Kirk. Is there anything you would not do for your family?”

“I wouldn’t open fire and kill innocent people,” Jim responded as his ship’s comm chimed. 

“Captain, proximity alert,” Sulu’s voice came through the comm. “There is a ship heading right for us at warp.”

“Klingons?” Jim asked.

Khan stepped closer as Sulu replied. “I don’t think so, Sir.  It’s not coming at us from Qo'noS.”

“We both know who it is, Kirk,” Khan said with a small smile.

Jim clenched his fists then ordered for Khan to be moved to medbay with six security officers with him.


Jim and Spock walked quickly onto the bridge. Jim moved the middle of the bridge of stared at the viewscreen while Spock went to his station.

“How long until the oncoming ship arrives?” Jim asked Sulu.

“About ten seconds,” Sulu replied.

Jim nodded and sat down in his chair. “Shields up.”

“Aye, Captain.”

On the viewscreen, the incoming ship dropped out of warp before the. Spock gazed in wonderment at the hulking size of the ship. He looked over the image of the ship on the viewscreen and saw no visible markings bearing a registry number or Starfleet symbols.

“Captain, they are hailing us,” Uhura said.

“On screen.” Jim paused before saying, “Broadcast ship wide, for the record.”

There was a moment of silence before the viewscreen showed Admiral Marcus’ face. Spock could feel his mate tense up. He stood and went to take his place beside the captain’s chair, hoping his presence next to his mate would calm him. 

“Captain Kirk,” Marcus said.

“Admiral Marcus, I wasn’t expecting you.” What the fuck is he doing here? Jim thought as he said, “That’s one hell of a ship you got there.”

Marcus nodded. “I wasn’t expecting to need to be here, Kirk. Why have you taken Harrison into custody in direct violation of your orders?”

“Well…we had to…improvise when our warp core unexpectedly malfunctioned. But I believe you already knew that, didn’t you? Sir.”

“I don’t take your meaning,” Marcus said, eyeing Jim.

Spock saw Jim force smile out of the corner of his eyes. 

“That’s why you’re here, isn’t it? To give us a hand with our repairs?” Jim asked.

Marcus stared at Jim but before he could respond, Jim added: “Why else would the head of Starfleet personally come to the edge of the Neutral Zone?”

Jim, Spock warned.

Spock, I think what Khan said has some merit.

I believe so as well but be careful.

“Captain,” Sulu spoke up. “They are scanning our ship.”

Spock and Jim looked to Sulu’s station before looking back to Marcus on screen. “Can I help you find something, sir?  The warp core is what requires attention.”

“I am aware of that, Kirk.  Where is Harrison?”

“Per Starfleet regulation, I am planning on returning Khan to Earth to stand trial,” Jim replied.

Marcus let out a sigh. “Well, shit.” Marcus then looked away and shook his head.  “You talked to him.”

“Why would I not question my prisoner?” Jim asked as Marcus looked back to him.

“Kirk, I took a tactical risk and I woke that bastard up, believing that his superior intelligence could help us protect ourselves from whatever came at us next.”

What would come at us? Jim wondered.

“But I made a mistake,” Marcus said. “And now the blood of everybody he’s killed is on my hands.”

Jim swallowed as Spock placed a hand to his mate’s shoulder.

Marcus is playing with your emotions, Spock told him.

Jim took in a deep breath and exhaled before nodding.

“I’m sorry for your loss of Christopher. He was a good man. To Starfleet and to you,” Marcus said.  “Kirk, I’m asking you…please give him to me so that I can end what I started.”

“And what exactly would you like me to do with the rest of his crew, sir? Fire them at the Klingons and end 72 innocent lives? Start a war in the process?”

“He put his people in those torpedoes,” Marcus said a little loudly.  “You saw what this man can do all by himself. Can you imagine what would happen if we woke up the rest of his crew?”

The Admiral has a point, Spock said.

“What else did he tell you, Kirk?” Marcus questioned. “That he’s a peacekeeper? He’s playing you, don’t you see that? Khan and his crew were condemned to death as war criminals. And now it is our duty to carry out that sentence before anybody else dies because of him.”

Jim and Spock looked to each other, both uncertain about who to trust.

Marcus raised his voice a little louder. “I’m going to ask you—lower your shields. Tell me where he is.”

Jim was quiet for a few moments before he nodded and lied, “He’s in engineering, sir. I’ll have him moved to the transporter room right away.”

“I’ll take it from here. Don’t do anything foolish, Kirk,” Marcus told him before the screen cut out.

“Do not drop those shields,” Jim told Sulu. Foolish is my middle name.

It is not, it is Tiberius, Spock said as Sulu said, “Aye, Captain.”

“Captain, may I know the details of your plan?” Spock asked.

“We’re bringing a fugitive back to Earth, Spock,” Jim replied before pressing a button on his chair and comm-ing Chekov. “Mr. Chekov, can we warp?”

“Um…yes, but we run the risk of seriously damaging the core,” Chekov responded. “I would not advise it.”

“I heard a ‘yes’ in there so we’re going,” Jim replied. He then looked to Sulu. “Set course for Earth.”

“Aye, sir,” Sulu responded, turning his attention to his station.

“Punch it.”


Marcus caught up to them with ease and dropped them out of warp and disabling their weapons. Carol was gone—Marcus had beamed her to his ship when she’d tried to reason with him. Now Marcus was about to fire at them—killing them all.

Spock stood by Jim as they looked at their bridge crew. Jim was near tears as he told them, “I am so sorry.”

My parents will not let them get away with this, Spock told his mate. He took Jim’s hand and tried to comfort him.

Jim gave him a smile. At least we’re going out together, huh?


Jim moved to hug Spock but stopped when Sulu spoke up.

“Their weapons have powered down, Sir.”

“What?” Jim asked, blinking his tears away. 

“Enterprise! Can ya hear me?” Scotty’s voice then came thru.

Spock watched Jim’s face lit up as he turned towards the viewscreen where he heard the voice. “SCOTTY!”

“Guess what I found behind Jupiter?”

“You’re on that ship!” Jim exclaimed.

Fascinating, Spock thought.

“I snuck on,” Scotty replied. “And now that I’ve just committed an act of treason against a Starfleet Admiral, I’d really like to get off this bloody ship!”

“You are a miracle worker, Scotty, but um…we’re a little low on power right now. Just…stand by.”

“What? Stand by? Low on power? What happened to my ship?”

“My ship,” Jim corrected.

Our ship, Spock mentally corrected.

“Call you back!” Scotty then said before the transmission cut off.

Jim did a little happy jump before looking back to his crew. “So, who’s not ready to die? Everyone? Good. I think I’ve got a plan.”  He looked to his mate. “Spock, how is our ship?”

“Captain, our options are limited,” Spock replied. What is this plan?

“Can we flee?”




“There is an option,” Jim said before looking to Uhura and telling her to patch Scotty thru once he comm’s back.

Uhura nodded then turned to her station.

“Spock, you have the conn,” Jim told his mate before walking towards the turbolift. 

Spock followed close behind, entering the lift behind his mate. “I strongly object.”

Jim kept from rolling his eyes. “I haven’t said anything yet and I left you with the conn go back to the bridge.”

“I am aware, but I know you and I know that you are planning something that I would object to.  We cannot take the ship from the outside so the only way we can take it is from within. Since a large boarding party would be detected, it is optimal for you to take as few members of the crew as possible.”

The lift doors opened and Jim walked away, Spock following. “Spock…” Jim tried but Spock continued talking.

“Captain, you will meet resistance. Requiring personnel with advanced combat abilities and innate knowledge of that ship.”

“Spock…” Jim tried again.

“No, you plan to align with Khan.”

“I’m not aligning with him, just using him.”

“I will go with you instead.”

“No, I need you on the bridge.”

Spock reached a hand out and grabbed Jim’s shoulder, turning him around to face him. “I cannot allow you to do this, ashayam. I am your mate and first officer. It is my function on this ship to advise you on making the wisest decisions possible, something I firmly believe you are incapable of doing at this moment.”

“You’re right!” Jim snapped. “My only thoughts right now are to save our crew—our family. So, yes, what I’m about to do doesn’t make any sense but I need to do it. It is my gut feeling. Not logic.”

Spock stepped closer seeing his mate start to shake slightly.  He grabbed both of Jim’s hands and held them.

“Spock, I have no idea what I’m supposed to do. I only know what I can do and that is to get onto that ship and fight Marcus there. Our ship can’t do anything right now. You need to stay here. Our ship…our crew…they need someone on the bridge that knows what they’re doing and that’s…that’s not me. It’s you.”

Spock shook his head. “The crew, all of us, Jim, look to you and trust you. I will take the captain’s chair temporarily until you come back. It is yours, not mine.”

Why you gotta be so good with words, Jim said before giving Spock a small smile.

Spock small back before Jim pulled Spock in for a hug.

“Come back to me safely, t’hy’la,” Spock whispered.

“I can promise to come back in at least one piece,” Jim replied.

“I have no doubt that you will, t’hy’la,” Spock said softly before hugging Jim tighter then kissing his cheek.  I do not trust Khan so please be safe.

I will, Jim replied before pulling back and kissing Spock on the lips. “Love you, Pointy.”

“Taluhk nash-veh k'dular,” Spock told him before Jim pulled away completely, turned and walked away.


Once the plan was laid out and Spock had the ships alight, he pressed a button on the arm rest of the captain’s chair to comm his mate. “Captain, the ships are aligned.”

“Copy that,” Jim replied.

Spock and the crew then listened to Scotty explain the size of the door Jim and Khan would have to go thru.

“Captain, before you launch you should be aware that there is a considerable amount of debris between our ships,” Spock told his mate and Khan.

“Spock, not now,” Jim replied before they head Jim asked Scotty if he was ready.  Scotty replied not yet and called Jim a mad bastard.

Mr. Scott and I will need to have a talk about how he talks to you once this is over, Spock told his mate.

I call you a lot worse, Pointy.

Spock was going to reply when he noticed McCoy enter the bridge and kneel next to the captain’s chair.

“This is going to work, right?” Bones asked.

“I have neither the information nor the confidence to reply to that query, Doctor,” Spock replied.

I heard that! Jim fussed.

“You’re a real comfort,” Bones grumbled.

“I am quite a comfort to my mate,” Spock retorted, glancing to the doctor.

Bones shook his head as Scotty said he was ready.

“Spock, pull the trigger,” Jim said thru the comm.

Spock swallowed, hesitating for a moment before saying, “Yes, Captain.”  Spock looked to the other arm rest and typed in a code. “Launching activation sequence on three...two…one.”


Once Jim was safely onboard the Vengeance and with Scotty, Spock was able to relax. He turned to Uhura and asked for a channel to New Vulcan—specifically Selik. Uhura nodded and went to work.

Jim, what is going on?

Um…nothing much. What’s going on with you?


The usual, big guys with phasers, Khan taking them out.

I knew this was a bad idea.

Well too late to change the plan. Now stop talking to me, I need to concentrate.

“Commander, I have that transmission you requested,” Uhura said, turning to Spock on the bridge.

“On screen, please,” Spock look to his friend and replied before facing forward.

Uhura nodded and turned back to her station and patched the transmission through to the viewscreen.

Spock watched as his counterpart’s face appeared.

“Great, the other one,” Bones grumbled from behind Spock.

“Mr. Spock,” Selik greeted.

“Mr. Spock,” Spock replied. “Selik. I have contacted you for two reasons. One was to tell you that Jim and I being held up by Admiral Marcus.  He has threatened to do us harm.”

“Oh dear. Why has the admiral turned against his own?”

“That brings me to the second reason for contacting you.  In your travels did you ever encounter a man named Khan?”

Spock watched Selik’s eyes widen slightly on screen before he looked down.

“Yes,” Selik said softly shaking his head. He looked back to Spock. “I have made a vow to never give you or Jim information from my time that could potentially alter your destiny. Your path is yours to walk and yours alone.”  Selik then paused and swallowed before his eyes hardened slightly.  “That being said, Khan Noonien Singh is the most dangerous adversary the Enterprise ever faced.”

Spock clenched his fists.

“Khan is brilliant, ruthless, and he will not hesitate to kill every single one of you.”

 “Did you defeat him?” Spock asked, illogically dreading whatever response Selik gave him.

“At great cost, yes,” Selik sighed sadly.

“How?” Spock asked. 


Oh shit! Spock heard Jim through their bond, feeling a bit of terror tremble on Jim’s side of the bond.

Spock went to Sulu on the bridge. “Where are they?”

Sulu shook his head. “I can’t find him, sir. Our sensor array is down.”

Spock knew something was wrong. Very wrong.  He needed to get to his mate.

Suddenly behind him, Spock heard the viewscreen turn on and the painful groaning of his Jim.  Spock turned quickly and stared, seeing a beaten Jim being held at phaser point by Khan on the other ship’s bridge.

“I’m going to make this very simple for you, Mr. Spock,” Khan said.

“Captain,” Spock said, walking closer to the screen. He looked at his mate and saw and felt how in pain he was.

“Your crew for my crew,” Khan continued.

“You betrayed us,” Spock said. Jim, are you well? What has happened?

Marcus dead, Carol hurt, Scotty down, Jim quickly said.

“You are a smart one, Mr. Spock,” Khan snidely remarked.

“Spock, don’t…” Jim tried to get out but Khan knocked him upside the head. Jim down and out of view.

Spock went to lunge forward before remembered it was just a viewscreen and that he couldn’t get to his mate.

“Mr. Spock, give me my crew,” Khan told him. “Your crew and your mate, for my crew.  I do believe that is a fair trade.”

“What will you do when you get them?” Spock asked, trying to keep his outer appearance calm while inside he fumed.

“We will continue the work we were doing before we were banished.”

“Which involves the mass genocide of any being you find to be less than superior.”

“Shall I destroy you, Mr. Spock? Or will you give me what I want?”

Spock clenched his fists. “Are transporter is down.”

“Mine are perfectly functional. Drop your shields.”

“I have no guarantee that you will not destroy the Enterprise if I do drop our shields.”

“Let’s play this out logically then, Mr. Spock. Firstly, I will kill your mate to demonstrate my resolve. Then, if that doesn’t break you, I will have no choice but to kill you and your entire crew.”

“If you destroy our ship, you will also destroy your own people.”

“Your crew requires oxygen to survive, mine does not. I will target your life support systems located behind the aft nacelle and after every single person aboard your ship suffocates, I will walk over your cold corpses to recover my people.”

Spock stared at the crazed man.

“Now, shall we begin?” Khan asked.

Spock wanted nothing more than to have Khan in front of him to pummel for harming his mate and threatening his crew.  He looked to Sulu and nodded. “Lower shields.”

“A wise choice, Mr. Spock,” Khan said.

Spock heard his mate starting to get up from the floor and flinched when he saw Khan kicked him back down. Jim was in pain and it hurt Spock.

T’hy’la, I will get you back here, Spock told him.

Khan walked away from the viewscreen and scanned the Enterprise.  “I see your 72 torpedoes are still in their tubes. If they are not mine, Commander, I will know it.”

“Vulcans do not lie,” Spock told him. “The torpedoes are yours.  Take them and send our Captain and crew members back. Please.”

Spock watched Khan and saw he looked pleased at getting his crew back.  Khan looked back to the viewscreen.

“Thank you, Mr. Spock,” Khan said.

“I have fulfilled your terms. Now fulfil mine.”

Once Jim and company were safely back on board the Enterprise, the torpedoes activated on Khan's ship. 

Spock couldn’t help by grin when as he watched the ship start to blow up and fall into Earth’s gravity. That is what you get for harming my mate, Spock thought right before the power on his ship cut off.

Spock, did you break my ship?

“Sir, the central power grid is failing,” a lieutenant said.

“Switch to auxiliary power,” Spock ordered.

“Auxiliary power is failing, Commander,” another crew member told him.

Auxiliary power is failing, Spock told his mate.


“Our ship is caught in Earth’s gravity,” Sulu reported.

Spock gripped the chair. “Can we stop?”

“I can’t do anything.”

“Lieutenant, sound evacuation, all decks,” Spock ordered.

“Aye sir.”

Spock then looked to the bridge crew who were not moving. “As acting Captain, I order you to abandon ship.” Spock then pressed a button and a seat belt moved over him, strapping him to the chair.

Jim you must evacuate.

I’m not going anywhere.


“I will remain behind and divert all power to life support and evacuation shuttle bays.” When no one moved to leave Spock said again, “I order you to abandon the ship!”

T’hy’la, please.

T’hy’la, no, Jim retorted.

“Will all due respect, Spock,” Sulu spoke up. “We’re not going anywhere.” Sulu then face forward and turned on his own seat belt.

My crew, Spock thought fondly before shaking his head at them for not listening. 


Something is wrong, something is wrong, Spock kept chanting in his head as he tried reaching his mate but Jim was blocking him. If these were their last moments as the ship fell to Earth, he wanted to wrap himself in the warm embrace of his bond with Jim.  Spock closed his eyes and tried calming his mind but snapped them open when he felt immense pain come from Jim suddenly.

He gasped then heard Sulu say, “Warp core is back online.”

Spock paused for a moment then said, “Maximum thrusters, Mr. Sulu.”

“Thrusters at maximum! Stand by!”

Jim! Jim, what is wrong? Where are you? Jim!

The ship then stopped its freefall, the thrusters working.

“Shields restored,” a crew member said.

“Commander, power online,” another said.

“Altitude stabilizing, Mr. Spock,” Sulu turned and told him.

“It’s a miracle,” the navigator commented.

“There are no such things,” Spock said, feeling his mate’s pain and knowing something was wrong.

He was about to stand and go find him when Scotty comm’d him on the chair.

“Mr. Spock, its Jim.  We’re in engineering…you better get down here.”

Spock’s heart stopped beating. The warp core.


As soon as Spock made it down to engineering, the block between his and Jim’s bond broke.  He stumbled out of the turbolift and fell to his knees, clutching his head as the pain of his mate dying overwhelmed him.

No! Jim!

I’m sorry, Jim replied weakly. 

Spock’s eyes prickled with tears as he picked himself up and rushed towards Scotty.  The man looked at him sadly then shook his head.  Spock looked past him and went to the warp core door as he saw Jim flop against the inside door and shut the interior door.

“Open it,” Spock demanded, his voice cracking.

“I can’t, Spock,” Scotty replied. “The decontamination process isn’t complete. You’d flood the whole compartment. The door is locked.”

Spock clenched his fists, knowing that he couldn’t do it.  He knelt down in front of the door. “T’hy’la.”

Jim looked to him and gave him a smile before his face contorted in pain. Spock placed his hands on the glass between them.

“Why?” Spock asked.

“’m sorry,” Jim said, leaning his head against the class and breathing heavily. “Needs of the many, right?”

Spock cursed the saying. In this moment he hated it and all he wanted was his Jim even though he knew Jim was right.

“How’s our ship?” Jim breathed out.  You didn’t break anything else, did you?

“Out of danger,” Spock replied before swallowing, the pain and agony from Jim was overwhelming him. “You saved the crew.”

“You…you would’ve done this. It was only logical.”

“Yes.” Spock’s bottom lip wobbled. “Please…hold on for a while.  Leonard can…”

“He can’t, Spock, not this time.” It hurts so much, Spock.

Spock reached out through their bond and tried easing the pain but it was too much.  The bond started to flare up and crack.

Jim looked at him, pain evident on his face, his eyes red and watering.  “I’m scared, Spock,” Jim forced out. “Help me not be.”

The tears Spock tried keeping back failed him. They trailed down his cheeks as he leaned his forehead against the glass next to Jim’s head.  He sent as much love and comfort to his mate as he could get through the pain.

He felt Jim reach out to him, mentally holding him.  Spock held him back.  

Will you be alright? Jim asked.

Never, Spock told him, starting to choke up. The bond was continuing to crack—their robust unbreakable bond was breaking.

Jim blinked at him and smiled again before placing a hand to the glass, spreading his fingers in a Vulcan salute. Spock did the same, shadowing Jim’s through the glass. He watched as Jim’s breathing patterns were becoming more labored and strained. Jim looked to their hands and Spock knew he wished they were really touching.  He himself craved the contact and wanted so much to open the door and wrap his arms around his mate.

“I love you,” Jim forced out, looking from their hands to Spock. “So…much.”

“Taluhk nash-veh k'dular,” Spock replied with broken voice.  Please...please do not leave me.

I don’t want to, Spock, Jim told him before breathing out one last time; his bright blue eyes un-focusing and his hand slipping from down from the glass. 

Spock cried out as their bond shattered. His mate was gone.


“Search the enemy ship for signs of life,” Spock ordered as he entered the bridge, shaking with abject rage.  His mate was dead. Khan had taken Jim from him. He need to calm himself but the only way to do that was to kill Khan.

“Sir, there’s no way anyone survived,” Sulu told him. 

“He could,” Spock snarled in response.

“Yes, sir,” Sulu nodded before searching the ship for Khan.  A few moments later, he found him and watched as Khan jumped thirty meters from the ship down to the wreckage.  “Whoa!”

“Can we beam him up?” Spock asked, clenching his fists.

“Zere is too much damage,” Chekov said. “I have no incoming signal, but…it may be possible to beam you down.”

Spock nodded and turned to find Uhura standing next to him.  Her eyes were red as she looked at him.

“Go get him,” She told him.

“I am,” Spock replied before rushing form the bridge.


Spock’s heart raced as he chased down Khan through the streets of San Francisco.  He was gaining on the man and it would only be a matter of time before he had his hands around his throat. 

Khan jumped onto the top of a small cargo carrier as it started to rise from its dock.  Spock gripped his phaser in his hand and jumped after him, grabbing onto the bottom of the carrier and hoisting himself up to the top. 

Khan was immediately on him, knocking the phaser from him and grabbing him up.  Spock grunted as he was thrown against a raised edge but quickly recovered and advanced on Khan, throwing punches and trying to get a grip on the augment.

He finally was able to grab Khan’s neck in a nerve pinch but found the augment was able to withstand it.  Spock growled as he got Khan down onto his knees and was about to punch him again when Khan grabbed his hand and wrenched his hand back.

Spock took a punch and then knocked Khan back. 

“You killed my mate,” Spock snarled before advancing again.

“Good,” Khan replied before dodging a punch then grabbing Spock’s head between his hands. “You’ll join him soon enough.”

Spock used one hand to grip Khan’s wrist while his other went to the man’s meld points. He pushed into Khan’s head as he felt his skull start to crack from Khan’s pressure.  Spock gritted his teeth and inflicted as much pain as he could into Khan’s head before Khan threw him to the ground then jumped from the carrier down to another. 

Spock didn’t hesitate as he followed, jumping a long way down after Khan. He managed to get Khan pinned and punched him repeatedly, before Khan kicked him off.

“I will destroy your whole family,” Khan said, getting up and kicking Spock in the head.

You will not touch my family!

Khan went to kick Spock again but then turned to see Uhura materialize onto the carrier. “I’ll start with her.”

And you will not touch my friend!

Khan made a move towards Uhura and she fired at him.  It caused Khan to pause in his tracks but he didn’t drop. 

Spock sat up as Uhura kept firing at him.  He looked around then grabbed a heavy metal latch from the side of the carrier, yanking it free before standing up.  He came up behind Khan and knocked him over the head with the latch, causing Khan to stumble and Uhura to step back.

Spock dropped the metal latch then grabbed Khan’s arm, bringing it over his shoulder and snapping it down.

He heard Uhura call his name, but his mind was only focused on killing Khan. He flipped Khan over and slammed him to the ground before kneeling over him and grabbing the collar of his shirt.

Spock thought of his beautiful mate as he pummeled Khan’s face over and over with his fists. Crying out in fury as he did.

Kill him, kill him, kill him, Spock chanted.

“Spock!” Uhura called.

He ignored her, continuing to punch Khan.

“Spock! Stop!”

“No! He took him! My Jim! My mate!” Spock yelled, his punching getting harder.

“Stop! Spock, he’s our only chance to save Kirk!”

Spock stopped, his bloodied fist raised up and ready to strike again.  He looked to his friend. “Do not lie to me.”

“I’m not! Bones can save him. He needs Khan alive though.”

Spock looked down at the beaten and bloodied Khan.  He was stirring a bit, not quite knocked out.  Spock gripped Khan’s collar tight as he pulled him up slightly from the carrier’s ground. “If Jim lives so will you.” Spock then punched him one last time, knocking him out cold.


Several hours later, Spock sat in the hospital room and stared at Jim.  He was lying motionless in the biobed, where Spock had gently placed him a few hours previous.  He’d demanded that of Bones, that when they transferred Jim to the hospital, Spock would be the one to hold him; to lift him out of the cryotube and onto the bed.  Spock felt nothing from his cold beloved when he did and it pained him.

Jim was now hooked up to machines that were pumping Khan’s blood into him.  Jim’s brain activity was minimal but they hoped it would get better. It had to get better. Jim had to wake up and be okay.

Spock reached his hand out and gently touched Jim’s cold hand. 

“You should go and get some sleep,” Bones said from the doorway.

“I do not wish to leave him,” Spock replied softly, staring at his mate’s face.

Bones walked over and looked over the machine and Jim’s vital signs. He saw no real improvement. “It’s going to take a while. Days, weeks maybe. You can’t sit here that whole time.”

“I could.”

Bones sighed then walked around the biobed to where Spock sat.  He hesitated for a moment before placing a hand on the Vulcan’s shoulder. “He will wake up. He’s a fighter.”

“I know.”

“Why don’t you get out of here, Spock?  Go back to the apartment and relax. Meditate. Call your mom.”

“I do not wish to…”

“I’ll be here, Spock.  I’m not going anywhere."

"Then I am not going anywhere."

"Stubborn Vulcan," Bones muttered. "Spock, I'll be here for now. I will have to leave eventually but Jim is in damn good hands here.  Jim would want you to take care of yourself right now. Go home and come back tomorrow.”

Spock stared at his mate's peacefully looking face.  He really did not wish to leave, but Leonard was right. He slowly stood up, Bones’ hand dropping from his shoulder.  Jim took a step closer to Jim’s bed. He leaned down and gently kissed Jim’s forehead, hating how cold the skin felt against his lips.

He reluctantly pulled up and stood up straight.  He felt Leonard touch his shoulder again.

“C’mon, lets fix up those wounds from your fight then you can go home,” Bones told him before leading him out of the room.


Spock stood outside the apartment building where he and Jim resided. He looked up at the tall building and shook his head. In the near distance, he heard sirens and first responders working through the rubble of the destruction caused by Khan. His crew—the ones that were capable—were helping while other ships that had been nearby immediately came to aide.

Under other circumstances, Spock would be there helping as well, but his draining mental faculties were affecting him too much. 

He took a step towards the front doors of the building before stopping and shaking his head again. He turned and walked away. He had no conscious thought of where he was walking to. He just walked and walked until he came to a familiar neighborhood.

The Vulcan embassy came into view and Spock headed towards it. He entered and went to reception before being allowed entrance into the residential part where his parents stayed as a second home.

The residence was quiet as Spock entered. He kept the lights off and went to the computer terminal in his father’s office. He sat down and hailed his mother but she did not answer. Spock sucked in a breath. He wanted his mother—his parents. He wanted his Jim. He did not want to be alone. Tears prickled Spock’s eyes as he stood and went into his parent’s room.

He took off his boots and his blue shirt before climbing into the bed. Once his head hit the pillow, the days events flooded his his mind. Spock's face scrunched and he couldn't help but cry himself to sleep.


When Spock woke several hours later, he knew he wasn’t alone in the room or on the bed. He felt someone’s hand gently stroke his hair.  He slowly opened his eyes and found his mother sitting on the bed beside him. She smiled sadly down at him and moved the hand in his hair to his cheek.

“Hi, kan-bu,” she said.

“Mother,” Spock sniffled. He sat up and hugged her. A few tears slid down his cheek. 

“Oh, sweetie, I know.” She rubbed his back.

“Jim is…he’s…”

“I know and it’s going to be alright.”

“What if…”

“Shhh, it’s going to be alright. Jim’s a fighter. He’ll pull through.”

Spock nodded and let go of her. He rubbed his eyes. “When did you get here?”

“A few hours ago. Selik contacted us right after he spoke to you. We immediately informed Starfleet before hightailing it here. I talked to Leonard when I couldn’t reach you. You weren’t at home.”

“I could not bring myself to go home,” Spock said. “Jim is not there. It did not…feel right...Jim is home.”

She touched his cheek. He basked in her comfort. He partially soothed the chaos in his mind. “I understand. We have a mind adept that…”

“No,” Spock said. “I do not…I just want to be left alone in my head right now.”

“How about a meld with your father?” she suggested instead. “Perhaps he can help calm you?”

Spock shrugged. “Perhaps later.”

Amanda nodded. The hand on his cheek dropped and she stood up. “I’ll go make you some tea.”

“Thank you, mother.”

“Jim will get better. It will take time, but he will come back to you.”

“Yes, he will.”

“Take a shower and change. I brought you a change of clothes.”


“Where is father?” Spock asked after his shower and a change of clothes. He sat down at the dining table with his mother and poured himself a cup of tea.

“He and Selik went to see what help they can be with all the damage,” Amanda replied.

“Admiral Marcus…”

“We’re aware as Selik told us.  Your friends filed reports quite quickly too.  They didn’t want Jim to be blamed for this like Marcus wanted they said.”

“I will file a report as well and then I will take a leave of absence until Jim is well.”

“I think that is a good idea. You need to heal as well.”

Spock nodded. I need my mate.


Two Weeks Later

Spock stared at the normal brain activity on Jim’s vitals monitor.  They had been normal for a little over a week now and Jim’s other vitals were much improved. It gave Spock hope that his mate would return to him soon.  The past two weeks without his bond with Jim had been quite taxing on his mental facilities. Mediation only did so much as did melding with his father. 

Spock looked away from the monitor and placed a hand over Jim’s.  It wasn’t cold anymore.  Jim’s skin was slightly pale, but there was a pink tint to his cheeks and lips.  Now, whenever Spock touched him, he could feel Jim’s mind reaching for him weakly.  Spock desperately wanted to meld with Jim, but he’d been advised by his father, Selik, and a mind adept to be patient.

Jim’s eye lids twitched as was the norm the past couple days.  Leonard was sure it wouldn’t be too much longer until Jim woke up.

Spock caressed Jim’s hand then stood up and kissed his clean-shaven cheek. He’d shaved Jim that morning after growing irritated by the stumble Jim was accumulating.  His mother has also trimmed Jim’s hair. Both knew how Jim liked to keep his appearance neat and how Jim would be fussy if he woke with a beard and shaggy hair.

Spock nuzzled Jim’s cheek before whispering into his ear, “It would be best for you to wake soon, t’hy’la. Please.”

Spock moved back to his chair by Jim's bed. Jim’s hand switched slightly. Spock touched it and it twitched again, sending a bit of tingles up his arm. Please wake up soon. 


Spock watched Jim’s eyes snapped open the next day. His heart hammered in his side as his mate breathed in and out for a few moments before looking around.

Bones was the first he saw Jim’s eyes find. The doctor was standing next to the biobed, looking back Jim with relief evident on his face.

“Glad to see you’re back with the living,” Bones said, running a tricorder over Jim’s head.

“Wha…” Jim croaked out, his mouth dry.

“Here, ashayam,” Spock said as he approached. Spock went to the other side of the bed as Jim’s bright blue eyes found him. Spock picked up a cup of water with a straw from the table beside Jim’s bed. “Jim, drink,” Spock said, holding the straw to Jim’s mouth.

Jim nodded and took in several big gulps of the water before releasing the straw.  He coughed a few times before settling and licking his lips.

“What happened?” Jim asked again, his voice better.

“You were barely dead, that’s what happened,” Bones said as Spock placed a hand over Jim’s.  It tingled and sparked where they touched and Spock relished it.

“I was barely dead? What?”

“You died, but you still had some minor brain activity,” Bones told him, placing the tricorder down. “Put your butt into a cryotube for a bit until Spock delivered Khan and his blood to me to do a transfusion.”

“Khan’s blood has regenerating properties,” Spock said, stroking the back of Jim’s hand with his thumb. “It took two weeks but now you are back to me.”

Jim blinked. “Transfusion.”

“Your cells were heavily irradiated. We had no choice.”

“Khan’s blood.”

Bones nodded. “I synthesized a serum from his superblood.” Bones then leaned down close to Jim. “You feeling crazy or homicidal? Power mad?”

Jim smiled. “No more than usual.” Jim looked to Spock and licked his lips again. “You caught him?”

“I did.  He harmed you so I had to harm him,” Spock said simply.

“Why can’t I feel you? Our bond?”

Spock looked to Bones and arched a brow.

Bones sighed. “Fine, I’ll give you a few minutes alone.  Just a few though. No hanky panky."

"Hanky panky?" Spock questioned. 

"Yes, no hanky panky. I mean it. Jim has some ways to go to heal before that can happen.”

“Damn, you always take the fun out of everything,” Jim chuckled weakly.

Bones lightly patted Jim’s other arm.  “I’m glad your back, Jim.”  Bones smiled then turned and left the room, giving Spock and Jim their alone time.

As soon as Bones was gone, Spock climbed onto the bed and laid on his side beside Jim.  Spock pressed his face into Jim’s neck and gently put an arm around his middle. Jim chuckled and moved one of his arms around Spock’s back and rubbed up and down.

“I thought our bond was unbreakable?” Jim asked.

“It is unbreakable as long as we are alive. You left me.” Spock breathed out. He was starting to cry again.

“I’m…sort of sorry,” Jim said. “I had to save the ship—our crew.”

“I know.”

“I don’t like that you’re not in my head anymore. It doesn’t feel right.”

“It hurts,” Spock sniffled, rubbing his face into Jim’s neck and breathing in his mate’s sweet scent.

“It’s okay,” Jim assured him. “I’m here. I’m okay now.”

Spock adjusted himself on the bed, moving his head away from Jim’s neck and propping himself up on his elbow to look down at Jim.  Jim opened his eyes and raised a hand to Spock’s cheek.  He used his thumb to wipe away the tears.

“Can you put the bond back?”

“Yes,” Spock told him.


Spock kissed Jim’s forehead. “You need to rest more and recuperate.”

“Putting the bond back will help me recuperate,” Jim replied.

“You are incorrigible,” Spock said before placing his fingers to Jim’s meld points. “My mind to your mind…” As soon as Spock pushed in, their minds reached out and immediately joined together once again. The damaged ends repairing themselves and send calming, soothing waves between them.

Both sighed in relief and clutched each other. Spock ended the meld, the bond staying firmly in place and shimmering. Spock had his mate back—in his arms, in his mind. He trailed his hand to cup Jim’s cheek. Jim leaned into the touch as Spock caressed him. Spock’s brown eyes were still watery.

“No more crying,” Jim told him softly.

“I find I cannot help it.”

“Try too, Pointy.” Jim then grabbed Spock but the collar and pulled him down for a kiss.

“I said no funny business!” Bones fussed from the doorway.

Spock pulled back and growled at Bones.

"No, you said no hanky panky," Jim retorted. "We were just kissing."

"Kissing leads to hanky panky."

"Can we please stop using that nonsensical phrase," Spock sighed. He looked back at his mate and kissed his cheek. He carefully got out of the biobed.

Jim leaned his head back against the pillow, his eyes starting to close. “I’m a bit tired,” he admitted.

“Get some rest, Jim,” Bones told him. “You’re going to be weak for a while so resting is good.”

Jim’s eyes fluttered closed.

Spock kiss his temple. “Rest, ashayam. I will be here when you wake up again.”

“’m kay,” Jim mumbled before drifting off to sleep.

Spock sat down at Jim’s bedside. His mate was back to him. He closed his eyes and felt Jim there—Jim was sleeping dreamlessly at the moment but Spock was ready if any bad dreams started to arise. He could chase them away.

Spock opened his eyes and took out his communicator while Bones checked Jim’s vitals again. He messaged his parents, Selik, and their crew that Jim was now awake.


“Amanda, can’t breathe,” Jim forced out as his mother-in-law hugged him tightly.

“Oh, sorry,” she said before pulling back.  She sniffled then touched Jim’s cheek. “I’m just so glad you’re awake.”

“Me too.”

Amanda stepped back from the bed to stand next to Sarek.  Jim and Sarek had already nodded to one another and that was about as much Jim was going to get from the Vulcan and that was alright with him.  Selik walked over to the bed and went to touch Jim but Spock growled.

“Spock,” Jim tried but Selik lightly chuckled.

“It is alright, Jim,” Selik said. “His mate is awake and he wants touching from others kept to a minimum.”

“No, I want a hug,” Jim demanded before reaching out and pulling the older Vulcan to him.  Spock kept quiet as Jim and Selik hugged for a few seconds then broke away from one another. Spock did gotover to Jim and take his hand.


Yes, yes, I’m yours.

“It is good to see you awake, Jim,” Selik softly said.

“Thank you.”

“Are you hungry?” Amanda asked.

“Are you tired?” Selik asked.

Jim chuckled. “No and no.”

“You should eat,” Amanda said. She brought over a large lunch bag she had brought. “I made you soup.”

“I’m not hungry,” Jim told him as Bones came into the room.

“Jim, you should eat,” Spock agreed with his mother. “Leonard, tell him he needs to eat.”

Bones shook his head. “We just stopped the IV nutrients, Spock. Jim’s fine right now.”

“Fine has variable…”

“Spock,” Jim warned. “I’m not hungry at the moment, but I promise when I do get hungry, I’ll let you know.” Jim looked to Amanda. “Thank you for the soup. I may eat it later.”

“Okay.” Amanda put the soup away.

“Yes, and when that happens, Jim, here is the menu,” Bones told his friend with a smile as he handed Jim a small laminated paper.

Jim scanned the sheet before making a face and looking to his bestie. “This looks like a senior menu.”

Bones nodded. “Yep. Soft, bland food for you.”

Jim pouted. “But…cheeseburger…or a nice juicy steak from Bi..”

“No,” everyone in the room said sternly.

Jim rolled his eyes. “Why are all of ya’ll so mean to me?”


One Year Later

Spock hugged his mother and then his father at the shuttle station.

“Five years,” his mother said softly. She looked sad but was smiling through it. “My kan-bu is going away for five years.”

“Amanda, a five-year mission is an extraordinary feat,” Sarek spoke. “We should be proud our son is a part of this.”

Amanda nodded. “I am proud. So proud, I just…Jim!” Amanda brushed past Spock to Jim and hugged him tight.

“Be safe,” Sarek told his son.

Spock nodded. “I shall try, but with Jim…”

“You never know what will happen,” Sarek finished.


Amanda and Jim came over to them. Jim smiled at Spock and took his hand. They faced Spock’s parents.

“We’ll have shore leave,” Jim told them. “Maybe we can time it right to visit you or for you to come meet us somewhere.”

“Yes, definitely,” Amanda said. “And keep in touch. I want daily messages.”

“Mother, we may not be in range for dai…” Spock stopped talking at the look his mother gave him.

Jim chuckled. “Yes, daily messages, we promise.”

“And keep each other safe.”

“Yes,” they both said.

“Because I want grandbabies after this five-year mission.”

Jim and Spock exchanged a look. “Um…”

“Grandbabies,” Amanda said again.

“Indeed,” Sarek agreed.

Jim and Spock nodded. “Yes, certainly.”

Hugs were given again before Amanda and Sarek left them to board. Before boarding, Selik appeared and Jim ran off to him. Spock growled but stayed back and let his mate talk to his counterpart. He watched Jim hug Selik then laugh and speak for a few moments.


Coming, coming.

Jim gave Selik another hug and came back to Spock. Spock offered Selik a Vulcan salute. They then boarded the shuttle and headed up to their ship.


In their quarters, they checked over everything to make sure they had all they needed for five years in deep space. Their new quarters were slightly bigger than before. Spock now had a space to meditate that wouldn’t bother Jim.

Spock walked back into the living room and arched a brow seeing Jim messing with a calendar app on his PADD.



“What are you doing?”

“Just putting something in the books.”

Spock glanced at the screen. “What is to happen in the year 2267?” That is seven years from now.

Jim grinned and looked up at him. “How do you spell pon farr?”


“Well, you and Selik are the same…”


“And he had his in 2267 so…” Jim wiggled his brows at Spock. “You will too.”


“Sexy crazy mating time.”


Jim laughed and put the PADD down. “Alright, fine. You won’t.”

“Indeed, and you should not be speaking to Selik about pon farr. Ever.”

“But I need pointers.”

Spock growled which caused Jim to laugh more. Jim grabbed his hand and pulled him along. “C’mon, Spockums, we’re due on the bridge.”


“Keptin on ze bridge,” Chekov announced from his station.

Jim smiled at him before bouncing over to where Bones stood nearby and clapped him on the shoulder.

“Five years, Bones!” Jim exclaimed.

“Five years in space,” he grumbled. “God help me.”

Spock nodded. “I am certain it will be fun, Doctor.”

Bones gave him a look. “Fun should not be in your vocabulary, hobgoblin.”

“Boys, stop bickering,” Jim told him.

“We are not bickering,” they replied.

“You usually do. Anyway, it’s going to be fun. All of us in space. Exploring…”

“Dying,” Bones interrupted.

“That is not the spirit, Bones. Besides, maybe you’ll come back with a little Leonard Junior with Carol?” Jim grinned before heading to his chair.

Bones’ eyes widened. “I…I…I need to make sure the birth control and condoms are fully stocked in medbay.” Bones then quickly turned and left the bridge.

Jim chuckled then eyed Sulu. “I see someone still likes that chair, huh?”

Sulu smiled and stood up from the chair. “Captain does have a nice ring to it.”

“And you’ll be Captain Sulu soon enough. How’s Ben and Demora? They could have…”

Sulu shook his head. “It’s not a good place for a little one and Ben’s work needs him on Earth. We’ll have shore leaves, though.”

“Definitely. I’ll make sure you all get as much time together as possible.”

“Thank you, Captain.” Sulu moved away and to his station.

Jim sat down in his chair and comm’d Scotty. “How’s our core?”

“Purring like a kitten, Sir,” Scotty replied. “She’s ready for a long journey.”

“Excellent,” Jim said as Spock came to stand next to him. Jim looked to his husband and smiled. Spock gave a small smile in return. “Commander, where should we go first?”

“I defer to your good judgment, Captain.”

Jim grinned. “Second start to the right and straight on til morning?”

“Logical," Spock replied, reaching a hand down to stroke two fingers across the back of Jim's hand. 

Jim nodded then turned to Sulu. “Mr. Sulu, take us out.”

Chapter Text

Age 31

The room was crowded. Not all of their crew was present but it was a damn near thing. The shifts had been changed or were about to be changed. A few buffet tables were against the wall, music was playing, and Jim stood on a table before them so they all could see.

“A toast,” Jim raised his wine glass up. Spock and the crew followed suit. Jim smiled at them all. “It has been one hell of a year. Our first in our five-year mission. So far, we have discovered a few new planets. One definitely not warp capable as evidence by several of us ending up in medbay with arrow injuries.”

“I still have the one I pulled from your butt,” Bones spoke up. A round a laughter went through the room.

Jim nodded. “Thank you, Bones.” And it was not in my butt.

Yes, it was, Spock countered.

Jim gave his mate a look from across the room. Spock raised his glass higher. “Continue, Captain.”

“Right, yes,” Jim said. “The other planet is now a new member of the Federation thanks to a brilliant diplomatic team consisting of Mr. Spock, Uhura, Sulu, and Ensign L’Mil.”

“They thought your fair features were demonic,” Bones spoke up again.

Another small round of laughter went around.

Jim nodded again. “Yes, yes. Luckily, they know that many people in the Federation are just as fair as me and have to get over it. We’ve also lost two amazing crew members. Lieutenants Michell and Koerk. Let’s pause for a moment of silence in their memory.”

After a moment, Jim continued. “So, for a successful first year, a toast to all of us and to those we lost and here’s to the next four years with you all.”

Spock clinked his glass next to Uhura beside him and took a sip of the bubbly beverage. He made a face and put his glass down.

“It was a nice speech, Captain,” Uhura said.

Spock looked up and found his mate was now before them. The crowd had broken up a bit, no doubt to return to duties or to find a spot to eat. “Yes, Captain, indeed it was.”

“Thanks. I know it wasn’t my best, but I know people just wanted food.”

Uhura chuckled. “Most likely. Oh, I see Scotty, excuse me.” Uhura walked away.

“They’d make a cute couple,” Jim said.


Jim faced Spock and smiled. “Are you excited for shore leave?”

“Excited?” Spock questioned.

“Are you…emotionally neutral about shore leave?”

“You are illogical.”

“Hey, you questioned me asking if you were excited.”

“I am looking forward to spending time with you and my parents.”

“And Selik?”


Jim chuckled and patted him on the shoulder. “C’mon, lets go make sure our crew aren’t over indulging.”

Spock nodded and followed his mate around the party.


On the starbase a few days later, Spock stood with Jim and watched as the blonde signed off on the minor repairs their ship needed and for the new inventory of medical and supplies they needed.

“And with that,” Jim tapped the PADD screen and handed it back to the starbase administrator. “I am on shore leave.”

“Enjoy it, Captain,” the woman said before walking away.

Jim turned to Spock and smiled. “Ready?”


They gathered up their luggage for their shore leave and walked together to the other terminal where a ship would take them to New Vulcan. They checked in at the right gate then sat down to wait for time to board.

Jim patted Spock on the hand and pointed to the left. Spock looked. Sulu was there in the distance meeting up with Ben and the now two year old Demora.

“Look how big she’s gotten,” Jim commented. “Cute pigtails.”


“Uncle Jim! Uncle Jim! Uncle Jim!”

They looked to the right and found Joanna running up to them. Jim stood as the eight-year-old jumped into his arms and hugged him.

“My lord, look how big you’ve gotten!” Jim said.

You said that about Demora.

Well, they’re kids, they grow.

“I know, I’m one of the tallest in my class!” Joanna replied. She let go of Jim and looked up at Spock. “Hello, Uncle Spock.”

“Hello, Miss Joanna,” Spock said. “How are you?”

“I’m good. I’ve got a boyfriend.”

“Oh?” Jim and Spock questioned.

“No, she does not,” Bones appeared and said grumpily. “He’s not your boyfriend.”

“Is too, daddy. He gave me candy for Valentine’s Day.”

“Doesn’t mean nothing.” Bones looked at his friends. “When does your ride to New Vulcan leave?”

“Boarding commences in four point nine minutes,” Spock replied.


Jim chuckled. “What about you two? Where are ya’ll headed off to?”

“Someplace fun!” Joanna spoke loudly. “We’re going to a water park, an amusement park, a zoo, a beach, a…” Joanna went on and on. The adults just listened and nodded.

“Sounds like a lot of fun,” Jim said when Joanna was finally done.

“It is!”

“Does it sound like fun to you, Leonard?” Spock asked.

Bones gave Spock a look. “Oh yes, oodles of fun.”


When they arrived on New Vulcan several hours later, Sarek was waiting and transported them to his and Amanda’s new residence.

Spock eyed the house as they pulled up and internally sighed. It was built similarly to the previous house on Vulcan, but it was not the same. No matter how many years passed, he would always miss his childhood home and his planet. This was not his first time at this home nor would it be his last—he just had to get used to it.

A hand gently grabbed his. It’s okay, Spock, Jim told him. Jim squeezed his hand. Think of it as a new home to make new memories.

Spock glanced to his mate and nodded. They followed Sarek inside and Amanda was immediately on them.

“My boys!” she said, hugging them both. “You both need to message us more often. Once a week is not enough.”

“Mother,” Spock sighed.

“Amanda,” Jim chuckled. “We do our best but sometimes work takes priority.”

“Mmhmm, but you did not tell me when you were injured with an arrow.” She stepped back and eyed them. “Leonard had to tell me.”

“I was fine,” Jim said.

“Fine has variable definitions,” Sarek spoke. “You could have died and we would have never known.”

Spock raised a brow. “That is dramatic.”

“And you,” Amanda pointed a finger at his son. “Nearly lost an ear a month ago, huh?”

Spock blinked. He resisted the urge to touch the tip of the ear that had been injured.

We need to have a talk with Bones when we’re back, Jim said.

Affirmative. It is not logical to tell on us to my parents. “Mother, Jim and I are both well. Now, we would like to get settled in so we may enjoy the next few days with you both.”

“Okay but come right back downstairs once you’re done. Dinner will be ready soon.”

Spock and Jim nodded and went upstairs to their room. When they came back down, Selik was sitting in the dining room waiting. Spock nodded at his elder counterpart while keeping from growling as Jim went to Selik and hugged him.

“So good to see you,” Jim said before sitting down next to Selik. “How are you?” The table was not large. Two chairs on one side, two on the side and one chair each at the ends. Spock sat down at the end next to Jim and took his hand.

Selik looked at their hands together then focused on Jim. “I am well, young one. How is your five-year mission coming along?”

While Jim started to speak, Sarek and Amanda entered and put food on the table. Amanda took a seat across from Jim. Sarek stood beside Spock’s chair.

“You are in my spot,” Sarek spoke.

Spock looked up at his father. “Pardon?”

“That is my spot.”

Spock’s brows went up. “I saw no sign and I must sit next to my mate.”

“I must sit next to my mate,” Sarek countered.

“There is a chair next to mother.”

“That is not my chair.”

“Spock,” Jim tried but Amanda spoke up instead.

“Sarek, sit next to me.”

“Amanda, that is not my…”

“If you do not sit then the couch with be your spot tonight,” She told him.

Sarek stared at his wife for a moment then walked over to the empty chair beside her and sat down.

Jim laughed. “I see that works with all Vulcans, huh? I have to use that line on Spock a few times. He does not like sleeping on the couch alone.”

“Neither does Sarek,” Amanda replied.

“Humans,” Spock said in Vulcan.

“Indeed,” Sarek replied.

“Vulcans,” Jim looked at his mate and said in Vulcan with a grin.


After dinner and catching up, Jim went outback with Amanda to look at how her garden was progressing. The Vulcans stayed inside and discussed the progress of the planet and colonies were making.

Spock offered some suggesting and insight from his travels which were well received. Sarek stood and went to his office to make a note, leaving Selik and Spock in the living room together.

“How is Jim’s captaincy going?” Selik asked. “He has spoken highly of the past year and looking forward to what is to come.”

“Jim is an extraordinary captain.  We always have transfer requests waiting in our message inboxes.”

“I would imagine so. I was enjoying hearing tales from your missions.”

“Any ones that you shared in your time?”

Selik smiled slightly. “Perhaps.”

Jim walked by the window and waved inside at them. They waved back.

“Are they…similar?”

“You speak of my own Jim.”


Selik looked out the window where Jim was standing and talking to Amanda. His eyes turning sad and distant. “There are similarities, yes, but differences too. Your Jim is still young, still coming into his own. Mine was the youngest captain, but older—more seasoned. Your Jim, though, has had to grow much quicker under more trying conditions.”

Spock nodded. Nero and Khan happening within a year of one another had been trying on everyone. Starfleet and San Francisco were still recovering as were Vulcans.

“I find comfort in Jim’s smiles,” Selik continued, looking back to Spock. “His smiles, his mannerisms, just the…way he radiates when in a room reminds me of my own James. I miss my t'hy'la dearly.”

“When I lost my Jim, however short it was, I…I did not want to go on without him.”

“A sentiment I understand completely. James Kirks are not ones that can be easily gotten over.”

“Indeed not.” Spock stood up and went to the window. Jim and his mother had moved on, further into the garden. Spock stared at them for a while before hearing a noise. He turned and found Selik was dozing in his chair. He went to approach to wake him but Sarek appeared and told him not to.

“When he falls asleep here, we leave him be,” Sarek told his son.

“I see.”

“He will awake on his own soon and excuse himself to his residence next door.”

Spock nodded and watched his elder counterpart sleep. “How old is he?” He did not recall ever hearing Selik reveal his age.

“He does not tell us,” Sarek said. “Amanda still bakes him a birthday dinner, though, as he did say you two have the same birth date. I suspect he is in his mid-one hundreds.”

“Vulcans can live much longer than one hundred and fifty. Perhaps…”

“Perhaps, yes,” Sarek interrupted. “But he has gone through a great deal in these past few years. It takes a toll. His mind is there, yes, as is his body but just in the past year Amanda and I have seen him slowing down some.”

“I am glad you and mother are close by then. To watch out for him.”

“As I am. It is an odd predicament. He is you but not you. My son but not my son.” Sarek looked at Spock. “He has spoken briefly of his own parents. It seems he and his father…were not close.”


“His father was not pleased by Spock’s VSA admission rejection. They did not speak for decades because of it.”

“I could not imagine not speaking to you for that long.”

“Neither could I, but they did. He also mentioned another universe he ended up in briefly in his younger days. In that one, there was an adoptive human sister.”

Spock’s brows went up.

“He said that that universe's counterpart’s father favored her to him and again, was not pleased by Spock’s admission into Starfleet despite the fact the sister was in Starfleet as well.”

“Illogical,” Spock said. A sister? No, I do not need a sister. My parents are mine. No one else’s. Well…Sybok but Sybok is well…Sybok.

What are you going on about? Jim asked.


“Favoring one child to another is illogical, but it does happen. But I do talk to you more than I do Sybok.”

“Sybok is Sybok.”

“Indeed. Although a daughter…”

Spock narrowed his eyes at his father.

Sarek’s eyes twinkled in amusement. “Your mother and I are too old to deal with another child. We are waiting for grandchildren.”

Spock shook his head then joined his mate and his mother outside.


“You okay?” Jim asked a few days later as they walked around the market in the new capital of New Vulcan. Buildings were in construction all around them.

“I am well, why do you ask?”

Jim shrugged. “I don’t know. You’ve been spending a lot of time with Selik. Usually you growl at him.”

“I do not.”

“Lying is illogical, Spock.” Jim took his hand causing a few Vulcans near them to raise their brows at them. Jim gave them a bright smile in return.

“I am spending time with him to learn more about New Vulcan and the progress…”

“Bull, Spock.”

Spock sighed. “Alright. Selik is me. My counterpart from another universe. He is old and I…”

“It’s kind of like looking at your own mortality,” Jim suggested.

Spock nodded.

Jim stopped walking and hugged his mate. “I love you.”

“I know.”

“And Selik has years and years left. He's relatively young for a Vulcan. Everything is okay.”

“I am aware. It is still beneficial to spend time with him. To learn from him. He is remarkable.”

“I know. I talk to him for more than just planning to runaway together.”

Spock hugged Jim tighter and growled.

Jim laughed. “And there’s my growly Vulcan.”




“Okay, you gotta released me now.”

“You do not plan to run away?”

“Of course not! I’m yours, you are mine. Where would I go.”

Spock nodded and let Jim go. Jim patted his chest and smiled. A moment later, Jim then took off down the street. Spock internally sighed but chased after him. Khan’s blood had given Jim a small amount of extra strength and stamina among losing some of his allergies. Jim still had most of his allergies, as evidence by still not being able to eat at Bill’s without having a reaction.

He caught up to Jim with ease. He grabbed Jim’s arm and made his mate stop running. He backed Jim up against the side of a building and pinned him there.

“That was not funny.”

“I know, I know,” Jim laughed. “Won’t happen again.”

Spock raised a brow.

Jim’s amused expression changed to a cute, puppy dog look. “I’m sorry, Spock. I promise to behave.”


Jim cocked his head to the side. “I can only promise to behave while here on New Vulcan.”

“We leave tomorrow.”

“Then I go back to my normal self tomorrow.”

“You are incorrigible.”

Jim grinned and pressed his lips to Spock’s. “You wouldn’t have me any other way.”

“Negative.” Spock kissed his mate back and planned to deepen the kiss when he remembered their location. He released Jim and stepped away.

“I think your parents are out of the house,” Jim said. “Care to…”

Spock grabbed Jim’s hand and started pulling him along towards the hovercar they had borrowed from Sarek for the day.

“Spock, slow down. I do want to get a few things from the market.”

"You can do that later."

"Spock," Jim lightly fussed. 

“Spock?” a voice nearby said.

Spock stopped and stood still. That voice sounded familiar.

“Spock,” the voice came again.

Spock turned with Jim and found a blonde woman standing a few feet away. She looked familiar, but where did she know her from?

“I am Spock,” Spock replied. “Who are you?”

The woman stepped closer and smiled. “Its Leila, you silly goose. Remember? From our night together?”

Spock’s eyes widened.

Jim glanced to him then back to Leila. “Leila, was it?”

Leila nodded, not looking away from Spock. She took a step forward and Spock took a step back.

“Hi, I’m James Tiber…”

“Yeah, yeah, that’s nice,” Leila said, waving her hand in dismissal at Jim. “Spock, it is so good to see you again. I’m here to help with some botany…”

Spock, who is this?

Not mine, not mine, not mine. Help. We need to leave. Abort! Abort!

Spock, what in the…

Spock quickly recalled his encounter with Leila and projected it to Jim.

“I’m sorry, to interrupt,” Jim said, his voice turning to his command tone. He stepped in front of Spock, putting himself between his mate and Leila.

Leila looked at him in annoyance. “Yes?”

“Hi, I’m Captain James T Kirk,” Jim told her, his voice still in his command tone. “Spock is mine. My mate, my first officer, my chief science officer, my everything.” He took a step closer to Leila, getting into her personal space. She looked up at him. “This meeting here was by happenstance. We are here for a vacation and I do not care why you are here. The night together you just spoke of, was hell for Spock. You were a predatory teenage and frankly, you are coming off as predatory now. So, you are going to turn around and walk away. You will never approach Spock nor me ever again. Spock is mine. Is that clear?”

Leila nodded and backed away before turning and walking off.

Jim turned to Spock and smiled. “Problem sol…Spock!” Spock picked Jim up and put him over his shoulder. Spock turned on his heel and carried Jim quickly back to the car. 

When they returned home, Spock proceeded to show how much he was Jim's and how much Jim was his. 

Chapter Text

Age 32 Part 1

“Perhaps I should go with you,” Spock suggested.

Jim looked up from his PADD with a raised brow. “Why?”

“Support.” And protection.

Jim snorted. “I don’t need support or protection with this mission, Spock. Hell, it isn’t even a mission. I’m a messenger.”

“A messenger for peace—a neutral party to go between the Fibonan Republic and the Teenaxi Delegation.”

I’m a captain, not a go between, Spock picked up from his mate. Jim sighed and leaned back in his chair. They were in Jim’s ready room going over ship reports and the ‘messenger’ mission. They had already had the heads of all other departments in there debriefing them on how the ship was running. “I’m getting tired of this.”

“Tired? We can continue…”

“No, no,” Jim said, shaking his head. “Not of this right now but of what Starfleet has been having us do lately. Nearly all of last year was running diplomatic errands for the Federation. When was the last time we had a real mission? Explored a new planet?”

Spock could recall the exact days since but he did not feel his mate wished to hear it. “Jim, I am certain after this…assignment…we will be allowed back on our exploratory course. I do have to say that some of our diplomatic errands have been interesting.”

Jim offered him a smile. “Yeah. That princess on Geonura was wild.”

“Indeed. She thought you would stay and be her husband.”

Bright blue eyes met Spock’s. “Only yours.”

“Yes, mine.”

“You didn’t need to knock her into that bonfire though when she tried to kiss me.”

Spock blinked. “It was an accident. It was not my fault that when I pulled you away from her, she lost her footing and fell into said bonfire. Besides, she was immediately pulled out and proven to be uninjured.”

“The Federation was pissed at you.”

“Then perhaps I am to blame for all of these errands.”

Jim stood and walked the two feet over to Spock. He sat down in his mate’s lap. “Yeah, I think I’ll blame you.”

“If you must. Is a punishment in order?”

His mate chuckled and kissed him. “Nah, no need for punishment.” Jim rested his forehead against Spock’s. Spock could feel Jim was down. Had been for a few months now.

“Jim, are you happy?”

“I’m happy with you.”

“And our ship?”

Jim sat back and looked into Spock’s eyes. He ran his hands up and down Spock’s arms. “Things feel…episodic. It’s like we’re in a rut. Not you and I but the ship, the crew.”

“The winter holiday parties were lively as was our New Year celebration.”

Jim nodded. “They were. Chekov is on his…fourth romantic partner of the five-year mission. Keenser always wins at limbo contests, Bones and Uhura are a great team at karaoke, and I now know Scotty doesn’t wear underwear under his kilt. Uhura is a lucky lady.”

Spock narrowed his eyes.

Jim laughed lightly. “But he’s got nothing on you. I’m luckier.”

“Affirmative. And you are wondrous at karaoke as well.”

Jim shrugged. “Yeah. Look, Spock, it’s just me feeling a little down right now. Things will pick up soon and I won’t feel like we’re in a rut anymore.”

“Yes, things will pick up. After all we have two years left in our mission. I am certain those years will be our best yet. And your birthday is approaching.”

“And your birthday is approaching.” Jim grinned.

“No, your birthday. We do not celebrate mine.”

“Oh, yes we do or would you like me to stop with giving you birthday morning blowjobs?”

Spock blinked. “No.” Those are my birthday morning blowjobs. It would be illogical to stop when they have become a custom in the nearly six years we have been together.

Jim kissed the tip of his nose and stood up. “Then we will have a joint party like always.”

Spock opened his mouth.

“And you’ll get your morning treat,” Jim added. “Although, I don’t know why it’s a treat when you get one from me a few times a week.”

“Its my birthday,” Spock said softly.

“Yes, yes. And we’ll be on the Yorktown then so we’ll do something nice especially since your parents and Selik will be there.”

“If you insist.”

“I do as does your mama.” Jim sat back down in his chair and picked up the PADD. “Now back to this whole Fibonan and Teenaxi business.”

“Captain, I think…”

“You’re not coming with me.”

Spock internally sighed. “Fine.”


Spock stood dutifully outside the transporter room and awaited his captain’s arrival back onboard. Jim had met with the Fibonan the day before and was given a peacekeeping token to deliver to the Teenaxi.

Jim was still down, Spock knew. He could feel it in their bond despite Jim’s best efforts to hide it. Spock wanted to do something for his mate, to cheer him up or make him see that things would be getting better soon but he did not know what to do. Sex was great, they always enjoyed copious amounts of coitus in their quarters and once in medbay after a disastrous mission a year and a half earlier. But sex could not fix this problem.

“He back yet?”

Spock glanced to Bones and shook his head. Bones stood next to him and cross his arms over his chest.

“What do you think the damage will be this time?”

“Jim’s meeting with the Fibonans went well. I suspect this meeting will be the same. No damage.”

Jim, how is the meeting?

I’m in a large room with them sitting high up above me. So far so good.

If you need assistance…

I’ll let you know.

“Jim says everything is going well.”





Um…I think they are mad.

Spock arched a brow. Pardon?

Yeah, they’re mad.


Oh shit, they’re coming down, they’re coming down…they’re….oh…small…and kind of cute…oh shit no!

Spock rushed into the transporter room. “Beam me down.”

“Captain’s orders were for you…”

“Beam. Me. Down,” Spock growled.

Scotty flinched. “I…um...orders…”

Oh god, why are there so many of them!


“Transport…” Spock tried but Jim’s voice came through the comms.

“Scotty! Beam me up now!”

Scotty turned back to the machine and started pressing buttons. “There’s a wee bit of surface interference, Captain. I cannot get…”

“Scotty!” Jim yelled.

“Okay, okay, I got ya, I got ya!” Scotty pressed another button and the transporter came alive. Spock watched and waited. A few seconds later his mate appeared with…

“Are those the Teenaxi?” Spock questioned.

“Get them off of me.”

The two red shirts in the room rushed over and pulled the small aliens off his mate. Jim grabbed up his shoe from one of them and walked over to Spock.

“Thank you for the help, honey,” Jim said.

“My apologies. I was momentarily stunned by the diminutive size of the Teenaxi.” Spock followed Jim out of the room where Bones was waiting with a smile.

“Ripped your shirt again,” Bones said.

“No shit,” Jim replied. He started to walk down the corridor. Spock and Bones exchanged a look and followed after him.

“Why did they attack?” Spock asked.

“I don’t know. They said the Fibonan would eat them and then…” Jim groaned. “No more being a neutral party.”

Spock looked over Jim’s rips in his shirt. “Captain, you are bleeding.”

“Looks superficial,” Bones spoke. “How do feel, Jim?”

“Never better,” Jim said dryly. He stopped walked and turned to them.

Spock held out his hand and Jim gave him the weapon piece from the Fibonan.

“Can you…”

“Put it in the vaults,” Spock finished for his mate. “Of course.”

“Thank you.”

Spock nodded and walked away. He went down to the vaults and entered the secure room. Spock opened the box Jim had given him and observed the device. It looked like a gear, some piece off of a machine. They had been told it used to be a part of an ancient weapon. Spock wondered what the weapon did.

I’m going to take a shower, change, and report to bridge, Jim said.

Would you care for me to join you in the shower?

He felt his mate’s amusement at the questioned. You know what, sure. Come join me.

Spock quickly cataloged the item, uploaded it to the Federation database, and put it away for same keeping. He left the vaults and made his way up to his quarters and entered them to find Jim waiting in the bedroom, wearing only his underwear. Spock let his eyes roam over Jim’s toned body and sunkissed skin. A few love bits and marks littered his torso from their previous romantic encounters

Spock wanted to leave more.

“Mine,” Spock growled, pulled Jim up from the bed and into his arms.

Jim leaned into him and their lips met in a passionate kiss. Jim pulled away after a moment. “Hey, can you first fix up my…”

Spock nodded and leaned his head down to kiss just under a scratch Jim had on his shoulder. Jim sat back down on the bed and Spock retrieved their dermal regenerator. He came back to Jim and cleaned the injuries before healing them.

“Thank you.”

“Anytime, ashayam.” Spock put the regenerator on their bedside table and stood before Jim. Jim smiled up at his mate. He rested a hand on his shoulder and pouted up at Spock. “It’s kind of sore.”


“Those things were small but heavy and you did just stand there while two were still attacking me.” Jim gave his best puppy dog look and pout. “A massage would be lovely.”

Spock internally chuckled. “That look does not work on me, t’hy’la.”

“It does.”

“It does not.”

“It does.”

Spock thought about. He quickly filed through years of memories, searching for the puppy dog look and pout. Spock quickly realized that, damn it, it did work ever time on him. “Well,” Spock said. “It just means that I am a good mate to you and allow you to get away with more than I should.”

“Riiight.” Jim moved back on the bed and made himself comfortable; laying on his stomach with his ass slightly raised up from the bed. Spock’s gaze traveled down the bare back to Jim’s round ass covered by his tight under garments.

“Spock, stop staring at my ass and come give me a massage. Perhaps without clothes.”

Spock quickly removed his uniform, leaving himself in just his underwear.

Jim folded his arms under the pillow. Spock climbed on to the bed and straddled Jim’s upper thighs. He placed his hands to Jim’s shoulders and started to gently knead the muscles.

Jim groaned and closed his eyes as Spock worked the soreness out of his shoulders. Spock’s hands felt electric against his skin. He arched his back when Spock found a knock and worked it out, groaning more.

Spock rubbed his hands along Jim’s upper back and shoulders before slowly trailing the pads of his sensitive fingers down Jim’s back. Spock shivered as he felt Jim arousal through their contact and bond. His own cock starting to become very interested and straining against his underwear.

Spock massaged Jim’s lower back and slowly worked his fingers down until they touched the waistband of Jim’s underwear. Jim wiggled his ass in silent permission. Spock tucked his fingers into the waistband and slid them down.

Spock pulled the underwear off and tossed them to the side. He stared at the new skin exposed to him. His hands went back to Jim’s lower back and pressed down. He spread his hands against the skin and moved to rub along Jim’s flanks before gliding his hands up Jim’s back.

Jim shuddered under him and arched back. His bare ass pressed against the bulge in Spock’s undies, causing both to let out low groans. Spock resisted the urge to lay down along Jim’s back and just rut against him. Jim did it again, circling his ass against Spock earing a sharp intake of breath from the Vulcan. Spock arched a brow, feeling his new mate’s amusement through their contact.

Tease, Spock thought. He ran his hands back down Jim’s back and shuffled back, away from the offending ass. Spock kneaded Jim’s lower back and dragged his fingertips down to the two, firm gluteal muscles, gripping them firmly before sliding his hands up to Jim’s lower back again.

“Spock,” Jim whined into his pillow, pushing his ass back up, wanting more attention.

Spock smirked before leaning down and biting Jim’s left cheek.

“Hey!” Jim fussed, turning over and staring at Spock. “Behave.”



“But you were presenting it to me.”

“No, I wasn’t.”

Spock arched a brow.

Jim blushed. “Oh just…behave.”

Spock arched a brow but said nothing in response. He took off his underwear before crawling over Jim and laying practically on top of him. Jim wrapped his arms around Spock and stroked up and down his back earning a purr. Spock ducked his head into Jim’s neck and nipped at the skin.

Jim wrapped his legs around Spock’s waist and moaned when their cocks rubbed against one another’s. Spock groaned as well, moving his hips as Jim pressed up. He picked his head up from Jim’s neck and claimed Jim’s lips in a passionate kiss. Jim moaned again, melting into the kiss. When Spock’s rougher tongue brushed over his lips, Jim opened his mouth and let the kiss deepen. Their tongues twisting and dancing. Jim arched up against Spock, running his hands up Spock’s back to card through silky black locks.

One of Jim’s hands wandered to a pointy ear and caressed the tip. Spock’s chest rumbled at the contact. He sucked on Jim’s bottom lip before biting down gently.

“Always with the biting,” Jim sighed, grinding his hips against Spock’s, enjoying the friction they were creating.

“You are mine and you are very biteable.”

“I don’t think that’s a word.”

“It is an adjective of bite and…”

Jim leaned up and bit the shell of Spock’s ear gently. Spock groaned before moving his mouth down to Jim’s chest, lavishing it with attention. Jim whined and squirmed as Spock’s rough tongue licked his sensitive nipples.

“Spock,” Jim moaned.  “Please.”  He started to pant as Spock moved away from his nipples and moved further down, marking him more as he went.

"God, Spock.” Jim pushed on Spock’s head to get him to his cock.

“Demanding,” Spock tsked.

“I am the captain,” Jim chuckled.

“Not in here,” Spock said simply before zeroing in on Jim’s arousal.

Jim arched his back off the bed and yelled out when Spock’s hot, wet mouth surrounded him. He keened and bucked his hips, forcing himself to go deeper in Spock’s mouth as he gripped Spock’s hair with his hands.

Spock knocked Jim’s hands away from his head then held Jim’s hips down.

“Fuck, Spock.”

Spock sucked and bobbed his head.  He looked up at Jim as he pleasured him, seeing his mate close his eyes and bite his bottom lip.

Spock hummed around him, wanting Jim to make noise. He earned after a moment when Jim released his lip, threw his head back and mewled. He bobbed his head for a few more moments, until he knew Jim was nearing his climax, before popping of Jim’s cock and sitting up.

“Why’d you stop?” Jim asked breathlessly. His bottom lip slightly swollen now.

“Because,” Spock said, leaning down and gently kissing Jim’s lips.

Jim smiled beautifully up at Spock when he leaned back. Spock smiled back. Jim pushed at Spock’s shoulders and flipped them over.

Spock arched a brow and laid back as Jim straddled his upper thighs. Jim chuckled then grabbed the base of Spock’s thick arousal and started stroking him. Jim pumped his hand up and down a few more times, gathering Spock’s natural lubricant in his hand before releasing the cock and moving his hand under him.

“I wished to do that,” Spock said.

“You do nearly every time,” Jim moaned, quickly working a few fingers in him and making sure he was prepared for Spock’s girth.

“Because it is mine.”

“My ass is mine.”

“No.” Spock quickly coated his own hand with his lubricant before moving his hand under Jim.

“Spock, really, I got…ah!” Jim gasped as two of Spock’s slick fingers slid inside next to the two he had in him.

“Remove yours,” Spock ordered.

“I can…”


Jim mewled and removed them. He wiped his hands on the sheets before tangling them in Spock’s chest hair. He rocked his hips up and down slowly as Spock prepared him.

Spock’s sensitive fingers probed Jim, rubbing them against his sweet spot, earning a sweet noise from his mate. Spock did it again, loving how Jim tightened around his fingers. He added another and watched Jim’s head lull back and his eyes close.


Jim moaned and nodded. “Yeah, yeah, yours just…c’mon, I’m ready.”

Spock removed his fingers. “Do you wish to keep this position or change it?” Spock asked, sitting up and resting his back against the headboard.

Jim didn’t reply. He merely adjusted himself on Spock’s lap, allowing the Vulcan’s cock to rest against his ass. He rubbed back against it, feeling it slipping in between his ass cheeks as he pressed his chest against Spock.

“I like this position right now.”

“As do I,” Spock growled. He wrapped his hand around the back of Jim’s neck and pressing their lips together in a dominating kiss. He nipped at Jim’s lips then moved to his jaw and neck, marking Jim as his.

Jim wrapped his arms around Spock as the leaking head of his husband’s cock nudged against his entrance. Jim lifted up, helping guide the penis into him; slowly sliding down and adjusting to the size of Spock. It hadn’t been too long since they’d done this so Jim only took a moment to get used to being filled. He seated himself fully on Spock and closed his eyes.

“Fuck,” he moaned, loving how long and thick Spock was.

Spock let out a breathy groan into Jim’s neck. His t’hy’la was always so hot and tight around him. They fit perfectly together.

Jim opened his eyes as Spock leaned his head back so their eyes met.

“I love you,” Jim told him.

“Taluhk nash-veh k'dular,” Spock replied, his hands lovingly caressing Jim’s back.

Jim smiled then slowly rotating his hips and clenching around Spock. They both gasped. Jim carefully moved up before thrusting down.

Spock’s double ridges rubbed against his prostate but it wasn’t enough. Jim moved back up then slammed down, crying out in pleasure as his prostate was hit dead on.

Jim kept his arms around Spock as he started to bounce up and down on Spock’s hard cock.  He started moving faster, riding Spock hard; gasping and moaning in pleasure as he did, his cock rubbing against their stomachs.

Spock grunted as he let Jim control the pace.  He admired the view—Jim’s cheeks flush pink and his plump, red lips were parted as he continued his litany of sinful sounds. His hands went to Jim’s hips, gripping him and aiding his mate in his movements.

When Spock couldn’t take the mounting pleasure anymore, he growled ‘mine’ and started pumping his hips up into Jim in time with his mate’s downward movements.

Fuck, yes, yours, Jim mentally replied, unable to make any sounds other than moans and cries of pleasure. Spock growled again as Jim continued riding him—impaling himself onto Spock’s dick. Spock continued to thrust up in time with Jim’s movements, feeling himself grow closer to climax. He moved one hand to the back of Jim’s neck and pulled the blonde close for a passionate kiss.

Jim mewled into the kiss as his prostate was being pounded by Spock’s blunt head and double ridges.  He tightened his grip around Spock’s shoulders then tore his mouth from Spock’s.

“’m close,” he managed to get out.

“Me too,” he groaned. His eyes trailed down Jim’s chest and zeroed on a pert nub. He leaned down and latched onto his left nipple.

“Spock,” Jim gasped as Spock bucked up harder and faster into his tight heat.

Spock released Jim's abused nipple and licked up Jim’s chest to his neck before biting down again. Spock slid one of his hands to Jim’s ass cheeks and squeezed. His other went to Jim’s neglected erection. He only had to pump his hand on Jim a few times before the blonde was burying his face into his neck and crying out and releasing over Spock’s hand and stomach.

“Jim,” Spock groaned as Jim clenched almost painfully around him. He thrust up into Jim once, twice before stilling and releasing deep inside him. Spock’s chest rumbled as Jim sagged against him and panted.

“Fuck,” Jim sighed.

Spock closed his eyes and held Jim tight. “Affirmative.”

“Do I have to go to the bridge now?”

“In a few moments, yes.”

“Okay, in a moment. Just let me rest until then.”


After a shower, Spock sat on the edge of their now messy bed and pulled on his socks.

Jim stood nearby getting dressed. “Do you sometimes wonder about doing something else?”

Spock turned his head to look at his beautiful mate. “Something else?”

“Yeah, like…I don’t know…if we weren’t in Starfleet anymore. What would you do?”

“I do not know.”

Jim looked back at him. “A desk job?”

Spock furrowed his brows together. “A desk job? I do not know. Perhaps assisting with matters on New Vulcan.”

“That’s something.”

“Affirmative, but Jim, we are Starfleet officers. We have our ship, our crew, and much more space to explore.”

Jim smiled. “Yeah, I know. I just…nothing. It’s nothing.”

“Jim…” Spock tried but Jim shook his head and pulled on his gold top.

“Why’d they change our uniforms?” Jim asked, presenting his back to Spock. Spock stood and walked over. He zipped up the back of the uniform. “What was wrong with the old ones?”

“I do not know.”

“These pinch my neck fat.”

Spock kissed the nape of Jim’s neck. “You do not have neck fat, t’hy’la.” He stepped away and went to retrieve his boots.

“How about space pirates?” 

Spock sat on the bed again and started to pull on his boots. “Pardon?”

Jim chuckled. “When I was a kid I thought about having my own ship and just flying it around and doing whatever I wanted. We'd be good space pirates.”

Looking up at his mate, Spock quirked a brow. “Jim…”

“Just joking, Spock. I’m not going to become a pirate.” Jim then walked into the living room. Spock finished putting on his boots and followed. A part of him knew Jim was not just talking or joking. Something was up. His mate was down and he wished he knew how to help him not be.

Jim was at the kitchenette making himself some coffee. Spock let him be and sat down at their desk. Their message app was blinking, symbolling a message was waiting. Spock clicked on it and saw it was from his mother’s account.

“Mother messaged us,” Spock said.

Jim turned back around. His white Starfleet mug now filled with coffee. “Oh. Check it and let me know what it says. I need to head to the bridge.”

“Certainly. I shall be there momentarily.”

His mate walked over and offered two fingers to Spock. Spock met the Vulcan kiss. “Try not to spill your coffee this time.”

Jim scoffed. “I won’t.”

After Jim had left, Spock tapped on the message and found it to be a video. His mother’s face appeared on the screen and Spock immediately knew something was wrong. His mother always smiled in their correspondence but this time, this time there was no smile and her eyes were red and watery.

Spock’s heart sped up and his stomach turned.

“Hello, sweeties,” she said, trying to smile. “I hope you all are doing well and staying out of too much trouble.” His mother paused and dabbed a tissue against her eyes. She took in a breath. “I…um…well I didn’t want to tell her over this but I didn’t want to wait to tell you two either.” She took in another breath and a few more tears slid down her cheek. “Selik…has passed.”

Spock’s stomach dropped. A wave of grief washed over him that he was not prepared for. It was not as intense as when he lost Jim but it still shook him. “No.”

Spock, everything alright? You’re…

I am well, Jim.

Seriously, because…

Yes, Jim.

“He went peacefully in his sleep,” his mother continued. “I went to his house this morning after he didn’t come over for breakfast. He was still in bed. Looked like he was sleeping. He hadn’t been sick or anything just…it was his time I guess.” His mother started to cry again. Spock heard some shuffling and then his father appeared.

“Amanda, please go lay down, I will continue,” Sarek said. Amanda nodded and stood. She left the view of the camera. A moment later his father sat down. Sarek looked as calm and composed as ever except for his eyes looking greener. “Spock, Jim, your mother and I will still be meeting you on the Yorktown. I have something to give both of you that Selik wanted you to have. We request that you come back to New Vulcan with us. Selik did not want to be fused over so we shall have a small, private funeral for him.”

Spock nodded at the screen, still processing the information.

“We will see you both soon,” Sarek finished before the message clicked off.

Spock, I spilled my coffee in my lap again, Jim told him.

Spock stared at the computer screen.

Spock? You there? Something is wrong. I’ll come back…

No, Spock told him. No, I am well. We should invest in a coffee cup with a lid for you.

That would be good. Spock, tell me, is something…

Mother and father will meet us at the Yorktown. I am…merely a little too relaxed from our coupling.

Okay. Alright. Are you still coming to bridge?

I was thinking I would go to the lab and finish my experiments. If that is acceptable, Captain?

Yeah, yeah, sure. Go ahead and do your science thing. I’ll see you after dinner. Bones and I are going to have a drink or two.

Affirmative. Spock tapped at the computer screen and hid the message so Jim would not see it. Jim was already down, this would…Spock was not ready for Jim to know just yet. Not now. He would tell him on the Yorktown. Spock then stood and straightened down his uniform before leaving the room.


While Jim hung out with Bones, Spock went to Uhura quarters. She welcomed him inside and made them cups of tea.

“What are you doing for you and Jim’s birthdays?” she asked after handing him his cup of tea. She took her tea cup and sat down next to him.

“My counterpart has died,” Spock responded.

Uhura gasped. “Oh my god, Spock. I’m so sorry.” She put her cup of tea down on the coffee table before them. Spock did the same. “When did this happen?”

“My parents sent word today.”

“Does Jim know? He seemed a little off on the bridge.”

Spock shook his head. “He does not know.I do not know how to tell him or when.” He looked at his friend. “I thought when this time came, I would be prepared, but I am finding myself unexpectedly emotional by the news.”

Uhura scooted closer and placed her hand on his knee. “Spock, he was your counterpart. You from another universe. It’s not unexpected to get emotional over his passing. You two had grown close over the past few years. He meant a lot to you and to Jim.”

“Yes,” Spock admitted.

“I grieve with thee, Spock. Selik was amazing. I remember before our five-year mission, he came aboard with Jim. He and I spent a good time sitting at our stations talking about the similarities and differences between his ship and ours.” Uhura smiled sadly. “He told me I should sing more often because I have a beautiful voice.”

“You do,” Spock agreed. Spock remembered when Selik had been there on the ship. The older Vulcan had moved slowly around the ship, stopping at various spots, touching the bulkheads, smiling fondly with sad eyes. Spock felt tears starting to prickle in the corner of his eyes. He wiped them away and stood up. “I should go back to my quarters.”

Uhura stood up, too. “Yes, and you should tell Jim, Spock. You need him right now and he’ll need you.”

“I shall tell him soon, Nyota,” Spock told her. “Thank you for everything.”

She touched the volkaya necklace around her neck and nodded at him. “Anytime, Spock. What are friends for?”


Spock did not immediately return to his quarters. He walked around the ship, stopping at the spots that he recalled Selik stopping at. None of the spots held anything interesting. The hall before medbay, a bulkhead in a room with slanted ceiling.

Spock touched that spot just as Selik had. Selik had even lifted the part of the ceiling and chuckled. He had heard his counterpart mutter ‘tribbles’. Spock lifted it and saw nothing but darkness inside. The only tribble on board was Westley, the tribble Bones had brought back to life with Khan’s blood before he saved Jim. Westley now lived with Scotty and Keenser in engineering and luckily, hadn’t reproduced.

Spock internally sighed and tried not to choke up. There were still many things he wanted to talk and ask Selik about but now he couldn’t. Spock left the hall and went back to his quarters. Jim was in bed with the lights off.

He quietly undressed and put his sleeping robe on. He climbed into bed and laid next to his husband. Jim stirred and turned onto his side to face Spock.

“Where’ve you been?” Jim yawned and asked.

“I was with Nyota,” Spock said. “And then I was in the lab.”


“How was your evening with Leonard?”

“Good. Had a few drinks, talked. Keenser’s got some freak cold.”


“Yeah, leaking some acidic goo which is freaking Scotty out.”

“Does Leonard have a cure?”

“Dunno. Didn’t ask.” Jim cuddled up against Spock. “You okay?”

“You have asked me that a few times today. Yes, I am okay.”

“You sure?”

“Jim, it is time to sleep.”

Jim yawned again. “Don’t keep anything from me, Spock. We’re married. We gotta talk.”

“Do you have anything you wish to talk about?” Spock asked.

Jim was quiet for a few moments before turning over and facing away from Spock. “Nah. Good night, Spockums.”

“Good night, Jim.”


“Wow, zat is incredible,” Chekov said in wonderment the next day as the ship approached Yorktown.

“Aye, she is a beauty,” Scotty agreed.

Spock mentally agreed.

“What a damn monstrosity,” Bones spoke up.

Spock internally sighed and looked at the doctor.

“Why couldn’t we just have a nice place on a nearby planet?”

“Showing geographical favoritism among inducted Federation worlds could cause diplomatic tension,” Spock told him.

“That thing looks tense! Like a damn snow globe in space just waiting to break. I ain’t going there. Just put me in an evac shuttle to the nearest planet and ya’ll can pick me up there.”

Spock shook his head.

“Bones, you’re going,” Jim said. “It’ll be fun.”

“You always say that and it never turns out to be fun.”

“So our relationship starting a little over a year into our mission, wasn’t fun?” Carol spoke up from her spot next to Uhura.

Spock mentally smirked as Bones’ face went red.

“No, honey, that’s not what…I just…I’ll be in medbay.” Bones turned and left the bridge. Carol followed after him.

“I would not mind if we did allow him to shuttle to a nearby planet,” Spock spoke much to the bridge crew’s amusement.

Jim sat down in his captain’s chair. “No one is going on any shuttles to anywhere.”

“If you insist, Captain.” Spock went to his station and took a seat. Their ship approached Yorktown and entered one of the arms, heading towards a docking bay.


While Jim stayed before to sign off on ship matter with Scotty, Spock disembarked. He stared at the sights around him. Any other day, Spock would be looking forward to exploring the new starbase and marvel at its scientific and engineering feat, but not now. Spock needed to find his parent’s before him.


Spock took a few steps then turned around. Uhura jobbed up to him.

“Spock, hey, how are you today?”

“I am adequate.”

She frowned. “Just adequate?”

Spock nodded.

“Did you tell him,” Uhura asked. 

“Not yet.”


“I have not found the right time to tell him. He is…his mind is preoccupied with Federation and Starfleet matters. I am going to meet my parents and then tell him later today.”

“Okay, that sounds like a plan. Just please, tell him today. He needs to know.”



They saw Scotty and Jim approaching. Scotty smiled and waved at her and she waved back.

“I’ll see you later, Spock. Comm me if you need to talk.”

“I shall,” Spock replied as their better halves came over.

“Ready to go?” Scotty asked Uhura.  She nodded and off they walked together.

Jim smiled at him. “Everything okay?”


“I think your parents are staying at the Vulcan consulate like always. I have a few meetings at headquarters and then I’ll meet you there later.”


Jim held out two fingers and Spock met them in a kiss before he, too, walked off. Spock watched him for a moment before heading to the consulate.


Sarek was sitting in a study when Spock arrived. His father looked up at him somberly before motioning for Spock to take a sit. Spock sat down in the adjacent chair.

“Where is mother?”

“Resting.” Sarek turned in his chair and picked up a box from the table beside him. He turned back around and held it in his lap. “Where is James?”

“Starfleet headquarters.”

“How is he?”

Spock looked down to his lap. “I have not told him.”


“Father, I will soon.” Spock looked up. “He has been…there has not been a good time to tell him.”

“There will never be a good time to tell anyone that someone they loved has passed.” Sarek eyed his son. “When you tell him, I will give you both this.” He indicated the box in his lap. “Selik left it for both of you.”

Spock nodded. “When Jim arrives, I will take him somewhere and inform him.”


Spock wrung his hands together in his lap then said, “Selik, Ambassador Spock, was instrumental in New Vulcan’s creation and growth from a mere colony to a new capital of the Confederacy of Surak.”

“Affirmative,” his father replied. “He will be missed by all that knew him here, in this universe. He…” Sarek paused. “I did not raise him but he was my son. I have lost him and now I know what it feels like to lose a child. I do not wish to feel this way again.”

Spock clenched his fits in his lap. “Understandable.”

Spock, where are you? Jim asked.

At the consulate.

I’m sorry to do this, but we have a mission. A ship stranded in a nebula nearby. The Enterprise is the only ship here capable of navigating it. We’re shipping out ASAP.

I will meet you on the ship.

Spock stood from his seat. “A mission has come up. Jim and I must leave.”

Sarek raised a brow. He placed the box back on the table and stood up. “You just arrived.”

“I apologize, father,” Spock said. “We shall return soon.”

Sarek held his hand up in a Vulcan salute. “Live long and prosper. Return safely.”

“We will.” Spock turned on his heel and left.


“Mr. Spock,” Jim greeted him with a small smile as he joined Spock in the turbolift.

“Captain,” Spock replied. Jim stood next to him, leaving a foot of space between them.

“I was thinking…” Jim tried talking as Spock said at the same time, “Perhaps there…”

They both went quiet and glanced at each other.

“No, please, you go first,” Jim said.

“Captain, after you,” Spock replied. “I insist.”

Jim nodded. “After this mission, we should sit down and talk. I um…” Jim licked his lips. “have something to run by you.”

Spock hoped it was Jim ready to open up about whatever was going on. Spock nodded. “I have something, a few things to tell you as well.”

Jim gave a small smile. “Okay.” Jim then turned and indicated the back of his uniform. Spock didn’t hesitate to zip up the back before placing a small kiss to Jim’s nap. “Thanks.”

“Any time.”

Jim turned back to stand beside his husband. “We make a good team, Spock. Right?”

Spock cocked his head to the side. “I believe we do.”

The turbolift came to a stop and the door slid open. Spock motioned for Jim to walk first but Jim shook his head and motioned for Spock to go.

“I insist. I don’t get to oogle your behind nearly as much as I should.”

Spock shook his head. T’hy’la, he said in a slightly amused tone.


The mission was straightforward: rescue a crew stranded on a planet in uncharted space. They would be on their own in the unstable nebula with no communication with Starfleet. They were the best ship and best crew in the Federation.

Any other time, Spock would have been scanning the nebula, running tests, but with his mind preoccupied, he merely stared out the view screen not registering much around him.

You okay? Jim asked.

You have asked me that question several times in the past day. I am well.

You don’t seem well.

Neither do you.

We should save this for later.


Spock left Jim’s side and went to his station. There was indeed much that he and his mate needed to discuss. Their ship approached the planet—Altamid. Kalara, who was their guide to Altamid, spoke about the planet and her stranded crew.

Altamid was a class M planet but with no signs of lifeforms and massive subterranean development. Again, an interesting find but Spock felt he was just going through the motions at his station.

“Proximity alert, Captain,” Chekov spoke up. “We have an unknown ship heading right for us.”

“Hail them, Lieutenant Uhura,” Jim ordered.

“Yes, Sir,” Uhura replied before trying to patch through. After a moment Uhura spoke that she had no response but was picking up some kind of signal. They were jamming them.

Spock raised a brow as Jim stood up and approached Sulu and Chekov’s stations. “Magnify.”

Spock turned his in seat to see. It wasn’t one ship but what appeared to be hundreds of small ships.

“Shields up, red alert!” Jim ordered.


The swarm attacked. The enterprise had minimal effect attacking back. They were not equipped with that manner of engagement. There were too many of them, moving erratically and unable to get a lock on. Their dish was quickly destroyed and shields soon became inoperable.

They tried to warp away but the swarm disable the warp drive, destroying the nacelles. Jim ordered emergency protocol and Spock stood, going into the turbolift, armed, with Doctor McCoy.

The lift opened on a lower floor. Spock held his phaser out before him, ready for whatever popped up. Bones followed behind. They turned a corner and found crew members lifeless on the ground. Spock left Bones and continued down the corridor. He heard noises near the vault and approached.

Spock peered around the corner and saw a strange looking aliening stepping out of the vault with the device from the Fibonans in his hands. Spock listened to the being speak in a language unknown to him.

Jim, I believe I found the leader.

Take him out, Spock.

I shall, Captain, but before Spock could make a move the being suddenly looked up and right at Spock. The guards around him immediately looked to, arming their weapons and pointing it at the corner.

Spock got off one shot that missed before he was fired upon. He quickly rushed back down the corridor.

I could not engage, Spock told Jim as he ran. The leader took the artifact from the Teenaxi mission.


I am being pursued and fired upon.

I’m coming after you.

No, Jim…Spock dodged a close phaser fire. He rounded a corner and called for Bones. “Doctor, we must go now!” Spock turned and fired at those following before he and Bones took off running.

After a few moments, Jim came back. Found leader…currently choking me…knows my name.

T’hy’la! Spock stopped running. Where are you? Tell me and I’ll…suddenly the ship jerked and impulse was engaged.

No, I’m good now. Stay safe.

I shall try but…the ship jerked under Spock and Bones and suddenly they were on the floor and sliding down the corridor towards an open turbolift.

Spock slid and tried to grab the phaser that had been knocked out of his hands. The creatures were still firing at them. As soon as Spock slid into the lift, the doors closed. Spock stood as best as he could and pressed the button to go to the bridge. The turbolift started moving up but them the ship rocked again and soon they were falling.

He and Bones stood up and held onto the side as the lift suddenly shot out into space.

“Fuck,” Bones sighed.

“Indeed,” Spock agreed. Jim, we are…ah…the turbolift was impaled by one of the swarm ships, knocking him and Bones around in the lift.

Spock, where are you. Shit this is bad. We’re abandoning ship. Spock, where are you.

I am…we are no longer on the ship.

What? Spock!

Cannot talk now, please take care. Spock hated to do it but shut off the bond. The ship that had grabbed them opened up and Spock immediately attacked the first being he came to. Knocking it around and disarming him. Spock hit a button on the ship and the being was immediately pulled out into pace before the hatch that had opened up closed again. He and Bones were knocked around once more and Spock repressed a cry of pain when he felt something piece into his side.

Bones stood up and took position in what appeared to be the driver’s seat. “My god, Spock.”

“What?” Spock asked before biting back a groan of pain.  

“They are taking the crew! The escape pods are being taken to the planet.”

Spock didn’t reply. He looked down to his side and saw a large piece of shrapnel sticking out of him. Green blood started to stain his shirt. Damn.

Chapter Text

Age 32 Part 2

Spock! Spock! Spock! Spock! Spock! Spock! Spock!

Spock opened the bond and was immediately greeted by Jim’s litany of his name.

Jim, I am here.

Oh, thank god. Or Surak or whatever fucking deity there is. Where are you? How are you?

I am…Spock pulled himself out of the wrecked ship, cringing in pain as he did. Injured and on the planet.


“Jesus, Spock,” Bones saw his injury. “Sit down over here.”

Spock nodded as Bones helped him over to a spot to sit down. Spock cringed again in pain.

Spock, talk to me.

I have a large piece of something lodged in my side.

Tell Bones to fix you!

“Jim says to fix me,” Spock spoke.

Bones raised a brow. “Does he now?” He leaned close to Spock and said loudly. “Well tell Jim that I’m doing my best here but I ain’t got no medical supplies to do a whole lot with!”

Spock picked his head from where he had been resting it against the ship. “Leonard, I am not a communication device. Jim cannot hear you through me.”

Spock! Did you pass out? Talk to me!

“I know that. Tell Jim you’re going to be okay,” Bones told him.

“The forced optimism in your voice suggests that you are trying to elicit a sense of calm in order to…”

“Spock, I’ll cut the horseshit, just tell Jim you’re going to be okay and not that you think I’m just saying that to calm you.”

Leonard says that I am going to be okay, Spock told his mate.

Good, good. Now, where the hell are you two?

Spock looked around then tried to stand. He needed to find his mate.

“Whoa, whoa, don’t move. Stay still,” Bones told him.

“I need to get to Jim. We must keep moving. Time is a critical factor.”

“I know that, you hobgoblin! But you have a serious injury here. A damn near fatal one!”

Spock sat back down.


One moment, Jim. Spock looked at the doctor. Bones sighed and observed the wound again.

“Spock, look, I gotta get this out of you or else you’ll die and if I can’t stop the bleeding once it’s out, you’ll die.”

“I can see no appeal in either option. I need Jim.”

“I know. So, tell Jim I’m going to patch you up the best I can, alright?”

Spock nodded and Bones moved away.

Jim, Bones is going to patch me up the best he can.

Good, good. Now, where are you?

Spock looked around while Bones talked about his Vulcan physiology and messed with the ship and one of the being’s weapons. I do not know. We are on Altamid. Someplace with a lot of rocks.

We’re on Altamid, too, but in more of a forest area. I have Chekov and Kalara with me. Kalara set us up. Apparently to save her crew who Krall has.


Yeah, he’s the leader. The one you saw. I still don’t trust Kalara or anything she has to say.

Keep an eye on her.

I plan to. The Enterprise…our ship, she’s gone.

I figured.

“So why did those things attack us?” Bones spoke. “I just don’t get it. Why go through the trouble for a doodad those little Teenaxi’s didn’t want?”

“It is unwise to trivialize that which one simply does not understand,” Spock replied. “It is logical to assume that device is more important than just being a doodad as you called it.”

“Don’t insult me, Spock.”

“I shall attempt to refrain from doing so.”

We’re going back to the ship…the saucer, Jim continued.  The scanning systems will have more range than Chekov’s tricorder.

Logical. He took the crew.

I know. We’ll get through this. We’ll get them back.

Yes, Jim, we will. Jim?

Yes, dear.

What is a doodad?




How much blood have you lost? Is Bones fixing you?

One moment.

Spock picked his head up again and watched Bones heat up a sharp piece of ship with the alien’s weapon. Bones stood up and walked over to him with the sharp piece.

“Doctor?” Spock questioned.

“Don’t worry, I just got one question.”


“What’s your favorite color?” Bones asked.

"Blue. Bombay sapphire to be exact." Spock furrowed his brows together. “But I fail to see the relevance.” Jim, I think Bones’ competency…OW! FUCK! Spock let out a scream. Bones had yanked the shrapnel from his side and immediately applied the hot instrument to his skin and cauterized the wound.

Spock? What’s wrong?

“They say it hurts less if it’s a surprise,” Bones said, holding the shrapnel for Spock to see. "Where you surprised?"

Spock raised a brow. I am well, Jim. Leonard has fixed me. “If I may adopt a parlance with which you are familiar, I can confirm your theory to be horseshit.”

Bones chuckled weakly then looked up to the sky. In the distance they could see the swarm of ships circling around a particular spot. “We gotta get out of here, Spock.”

“Agreed.” Jim, we are moving to another location.

Okay, so are we. Be careful and be safe, t’hy’la.

Same to you, ashal-veh.


They walked away from the swarming they saw, up the river and to a rockier area of the planet. Spock had found a cave of some sort and had entered with Bones trailing behind fussing about how dark and ominous it was.

It wasn’t a cave, but some sort of building. Spock looked around and found symbols adorning the wall that were also on the artifact that Krall stole. Spock had nearly reopened his wound investigating the dwelling. He fell down and Bones had helped him sit down and against the wall of the dwelling and now that’s where they sat together as night fell. They stayed awake for as long as they could. Spock told Jim they were safe and about to sleep. Jim told him good and that he loved him before using their bond to lull Spock to sleep.

“Spock, Spock,” he heard Bones’ voice before feeling the man touching his face. He didn’t want him touching his face. “Wake up, dammit!”

“Doctor,” Spock opened his eyes and spoke. “Cease.”

Bones kept his hands on his face and looked him over. Spock put up with it for a moment before moving Bones’ hands away.

“I am entirely conscious, Doctor.”

“You looked dead for a moment. You were eerily still.”

“I was sleeping and then attempting to meditate and contemplate the nature of mortality.”

Bones sighed and sat back down beside him. “Feeling philosophical, Spock? Massive blood loss, even for a Vulcan, will do that to you.”

“The blood loss has had no effect on my mental facilities. I…recently, before we arrived here, I have been concerned, in the light of Vulcan’s demise, that perhaps I owed a debt of duty to my species.”

Bones smirked. “You thought you should be off making little Vulcans? Is that it? Because I’m pretty sure you don’t need to go anywhere to do that. Jim would look lovely having your babies, Spock.”

Spock considered the thought. An image popped up in his head that quickly made Jim say to him, The hell is going on with you?


Then why are you thinking about me pregnant at a time like this?

No reason.

How much blood have you lost?

Much, but I am well. How are you?

“As interesting as that thought is, Doctor, that was not exactly what I was thinking of,” Spock said. “I recently received some news which has affected me unexpectedly.”

“What news? Is everything alright with your folks?”

“My parents…are in mourning. Selik…Ambassador Spock, my counterpart, has died.”

“Oh Spock, I’m so sorry. I can’t imagine what that must feel like.”

Spock felt himself getting emotional again with tears prickling his eyes. He sucked in a breath. “When you have lived as many lives as he, fear of death is illogical.”

“Fear of death is what keeps us alive, Spock.”

Spock looked to his friend. “I want to live as he did. To assist with New Vulcan, to help my people. I…I have decided to redirect my efforts and continue his work on New Vulcan.”

“Jesus, Spock,” Bones sighed. He turned to Spock, looking concerned and surprised.  “You’re leaving Starfleet?”

Spock looked away.

“What did Jim have to say about that? He’s been off lately, is this why? Ya’ll looking to leave or are you leaving him?”

Spock shook his head. “I would never leave my mate. Jim…Jim does not know yet.”

“Doesn’t know what? That you want to leave or…”

“He does not know my counterpart has passed nor that I am thinking of leaving for New Vulcan.”


“I could not bring myself to tell him. I kept telling myself that it was not the right time but there is never a right time to talk about something like this.”

“No, its not. Dammit, Spock, he’s not going to like this. Any of this. Keeping Selik’s death from him and thinking of leaving. Hell, I don’t know what he’d do without you. I don’t know what you’d do without him. Ya’ll are codependent pains in my ass."

Spock looked back to Bones. Bones gave him a small smile. “I know things haven’t been much fun lately on the ship with the errands we’ve been running, but its our home. Jim has wanted that ship since he first laid eyes on it in Riverside.”

“I am aware.”

“Ya’ll belong together, Spock. In Starfleet. I mean, if you want to leave, I’ll throw a party but Jim, Jim would be devastated and definitely drop everything to follow you to the ends of the Universe.”

Spock nodded. “Jim and I have much to discuss when we make it back to Yorktown.”

“No, shit. Hey, where is Jim right now?”

Where are you? Spock asked.

Um…still in the forest part but now with more rocks. Kalara is dead. She was working for Krall all along, trying to get that device. Apparently is called Abronath.

“Abronath,” Spock said out loud.

“Abra what?” Bones asked.

“The device, it is called Abronath.”

“Oh okay.”

We also have the location of Krall’s base, Jim continued. We’re heading there now but we’re still some ways away.

Spock slowly stood up, causing Bones to jump up and help him. We should meet up somewhere. I am certain together we can…

No, Spock, you’re injured. Stay put with Bones.

No, I need to be with you.

Spock, stay…oh shit.










Hey, so, funny thing just happened, Spock. 


Um...Chekov and I are...trapped. 

Trapped? “Jim is trapped.”

“I’m not surprised,” Bones said.

Yeah, some booby trap. Chekov and I are stuck in this…well it started a gassy goo thing and now its hardened.

Spock headed for the exit of the dwelling with Bones following close behind. Stay put and I will come get you.

Couldn’t move if I wanted to.

“We must get to my mate,” Spock said, starting to trek west.

“Where the hell is Jim?”

“Caught in a booby trap,” Spock replied. “He is in a forest with rocks.”

“Well that’s helpful.” Bones walked beside him, every now and again, putting his arm on Spock to steady him.


After walking for several minutes, Spock had to rest against a large rock. Bones took out his communicator and tried hailing someone, anyone.

“No one is there,” Spock told him.

Something is coming, Jim spoke.

Jim, can you hide?

Hide? Spock I’m trapped and can’t even move, but yes, I’ll hide.

Good, hiding is good.

Seriously, how much blood have you lost? Wait, the noises are getting closer.


Oh my god!

Jim, what is happening.

Fuck yes! Its Scotty and some lady.


She’s got a big stick, why does she have a stick? Don’t hit us….ow!





I’m okay, Jim said in a groan. No longer trapped.

Jim what is…

Spock, one sec, I’m trying to talk to Scotty and can’t run two conversations at the same time.

You should.


I am quiet. Spock looked at Bones. “Jim is not trapped anymore and has found Scotty.”

“Thank god for that,” Bones sighed in relief. “Jim, Scotty, and Chekov, I’m sure they’ll put their heads together and figure things out.”


Spock closed his eyes and concentrated on managing the pain in his side. After a few moments, Jim came back.

Alright, the lady, her name is Jaylah.  Scotty hasn’t found anyone else. They have a house. Jaylah calls it a house but Scotty says it’s a federation ship.

A federation ship?

Yeah. We’re going there. I’ll talk to you later when I know more.

Are you safe?

Yes, Spock, I’m safe. I love you and I want you to be safe. Take care, I’ll talk to you soon.

I love you as well.


“USS Franklin,” Spock said as he once again stopped to rest. His wound had torn open slightly causing him to bleed again. He was in considerable pain and could only walk a few feet before needing to rest again. He had suggested that Bones leave him behind to increase his odds for survival but Bones had refused.

Bones looked at. “What?”

“Jim is on the USS Franklin.”

Bones stopped walking and faced Spock. “What?”

Spock quirked a brow. “Did I not tell you that Jaylah’s house is the USS Franklin?”

Bones eyes went wide. “Who the hell is Jaylah?”

“Jaylah, her house is the USS Franklin.”

Stepping closer, Bones held a finger in front of Spock’s eyes and ran it back and forth in front of them. Spock watched the finger for a second then blinked and focused on his friend.

“Doctor, I have not suffered a head injury.”

Bones put his finger down and looked cantankerous. “Then why the hell haven’t you mentioned in the past hour that Jim is on a ship?”

“I thought I had. Jim and I have been communicating this whole time. I apologize for not keeping you in the loop.”

Bones shook his head and took out his communicator. “Vulcan voodoo. USS Franklin, can you here me? Jim, are you there?”

Spock, do either of you have a communicator?

Yes, Bones does and he is trying to hail you and the Franklin.

Great because I think Chekov picked up its signal. Where are ya’ll?

Still in a rocky area.

We have a lock on your signal but um…the transporter we have is old.

I would imagine so.

We have a lock on both of you and we can beam you but…we don’t know if it’ll work completely.

Meaning injury or death may occur.


Beam me first.


No, Jim, beam me first. McCoy is a valuable asset and…

So are you.

Jim, please, you know it is right. Beam me first.

Bones put the communicator away as they heard noises. They looked up and found some of the swarm ships approaching their location.

Jim, now would be an excellent time to beam us back.

One sec, Spock, still calibrating the transporter.

Please hurry.

Spock and Bones stood back to back as the ships surrounded them.

“Well,” Bones said as Spock felt the telltale tingles of being dematerialized wash over him. “At least I won’t die alone.”

Spock disappeared from the rocky terrain and reappered shortly on a transporter pad. As soon as he saw his mate, Spock stumbled over and wrapped his arms around him.

“Spock,” Jim sighed in relief, hugging him back.

Spock put his face in Jim’s neck and breathed in. You are in need of a shower but you are mine.

Jim helped Spock off the pad. No shit. Same to you, Jim replied.

“Alright, beaming Leonard back now,” Scotty said. A moment later he heard Bones’ breathing behind him. “Good ta see you in one piece, Doctor.”

“Am I? I feel like my innards have been to a barn dance!”

“Aye, well, these old transporters were only ever used for cargo, but a few modifications seem to do the trick.”

“Still don’t feel right.”

Spock looked at the doctor and couldn’t help but agree. Bones walked over to him and Jim.

“I see the happy couple has been reunited,” Bones spoke.

“Good to have you back. Both of you,” Jim responded. “How are you?”

“I’m fine, but your hubby here is still injured. I fixed him the best I could but…” Bones trailed off as Spock groaned in pain and doubled over. “Dammit, Spock.” Bones looked to their crewmates and the new girl, Jaylah. “Are there any medical supplies on this thing?”

“This way,” Jaylah said before running off.

Spock tried to protest that he was fine but Jim shut up him with a kiss before he was made to lay down on the couch behind him. Jim put a bundle of fabric under his head.

“There you go,” Jim said. “I missed you.”

“And I missed you, ashayam.”

“Are they mates?” they heard Jaylah ask Scotty when she came back with Bones' medical equipment.

“Oh yes, mates, husbands, and all that. That is Spock and then that is Doctor McCoy.”

“Spock is James T’s mate.”

“More like James is Spock’s mate.”

“I see.”

Spock shook his head at the conversation. He looked at Jim. “The artifact seems to have originated from this planet.”

Jim nodded. “That makes sense.” Jim’s hand hesitantly touched the blood-soaked fabric near his injury. “Oh Spock.”

“Jim, I shall be fine.”

“Fine has variable definitions. How are we gonna get out of this one, Spock?” Jim kissed Spock’s cheek and took his hand in his. “We’ve got no ship, no crew. Not the best odds.”

The pain was starting to worsen. Spock blinked and looked up into his mate’s beautiful blue eyes. “We will do what we have always done, Jim. We will find hope in the impossible.”

Jim gave him a smile. “We will, won’t we?”


“Let’s get you patched up first, okay. I need you.”

“And I need you but you must focus your efforts on helping the crew.”

“That’s why I need you around, Spock,” Jim told him.

“They are cute mates,” Jaylah spoke again.

“Yeah, but sometimes Spock can get growly if you get to close or touch Jim too much,” Scotty said.

Jim cast a look over his shoulder at them as Bones came over with some supplies.

“These things are from the dark ages,” Bones said.

Spock groaned as a surge of pain went from his wound all over his body.

“Bones, please,” Jim said.

“I got it, I got it,” Bones grumbled. He held up a device. “I’m pretty sure this is a protoplaser.” Bones lifted up Spock’s shirt to reveal the nasty looking wound.

Oh my love, Jim internally sighed. Spock could feel his mate getting upset that he was injured. Spock sent soothing feels through their bond only to have Jim return them to soothe him instead.

“This should stop the internal hemorrhaging,” Bones said.

“The miserable have no other medicine but only hope,” Spock quoted.

Jim ran a hand through Spock’s hair.

Bones chuckled lightly. “Death’s door and he’s quoting Shakespeare.”

Spock shook his head before closing his eyes and letting Bones patch him up.


After being fixed up by Bones and feeling a lot better, Spock changed into a USS Franklin uniform that fit and didn’t smell too musty. Jim had hovered nearby, making sure he was alright. They shared a brief kiss before they all reconvened on the bridge to discuss their next moves.

“We should wait until we’re absolutely sure,” Scotty spoke. They were arguing about what do with about the coordinates they had gotten from Kalara.

“No, we have to get the crew back now,” Jim argued. “Chekov has the coordinates that can lead us to Krall’s base, so we can go.”

“With respect, sir, how do we know that Krall was at the base when she called him?” Scotty countered.

Care to back me up, Spock? Jim asked.

He does raise a valid point.

That’s not baking me up.

I am thinking.

“And even if he was, we don’t know that the crew is even with him,” Scotty continued.

“Of if they are even still alive,” Bones added.

“Bones, really?” Jim sighed.

I have an idea, Spock thought. “Mr. Scott, you were the last one with Uhura, correct?”

Scotty nodded. “Yeah, before all this happened. I mean we were in our respective stations before shit hit the fan.”

Jaylah gave Scotty a look at that phrase.

“To the best of your knowledge, was she wearing the necklace I gave her?”

Scotty thought about it and then nodded again. “The one with the blue gem? Yeah, she hardly ever takes it off.”

Care to share with the class, Spock?

We are not in a class, Jim.

Spock walked over to Chekov and the station he was standing before. “Mr. Chekov, can you reconfigure the search parameters in order to compensate for this formula?” Spock pulled in the formula into the computer with Chekov looking on.

“What is this formula?” Chekov asked.

“It is Vokaya,” Spock replied. “A mineral that was unique to Vulcan which emits a low-level radiation.”

Chekov went over to another computer to try and search for the Vokaya’s signal.

“Spock, care to explain now?” Jim asked.

“Yeah, what’s with the Vulcan mineral?” Bones asked.

“Lieutenant Uhura is wearing a Vokaya gem,” Spock told them.

“You gave my girlfriend a radioactive gem?” Scotty asked.

“I thought Jim is Spock’s mate,” Jaylah spoke.

“He is my mate,” Spock said. “I gave Uhura the necklace as a token of my friendship and respect. The emission is harmless, but its unique signature makes it very easy to identify.”

“So you gave Scotty’s girlfriend a tracking device?” Bones asked.

Jim looked at his mate. “He planned to give it to me first. A tracking device, Spock, really?”

Spock blinked. “That was not my intention.”

“What? To give me a tracking device or Uhura?” Jim asked teasingly.

Spock blinked again. “Both.”

“Riight,” Bones chuckled. “Well, a tracking device for Jim doesn’t sound too bad.”

“Hey,” Jim fussed lightly. Don’t you even dare, Spock.

I would not. Spock was already thinking in the back of his mind how to get another gem and to present it to his mate without him knowing it was Vokaya.

Spock, Jim warned.

Fine, Spock relented but still put the idea in the far back corners of his mind where Jim wouldn’t find it.


After convincing Jaylah to help them, they devised a plan to get them into Krall’s base and get the crew out. Jim had tried to get Spock to stay on the ship, but Spock disagreed. He needed to be there to rescue his crew, his friends, his family.

Bones agreed to go with him, to keep an eye on him which appeased Jim.

“I still don’t like you going,” Jim told him when they were all about to beam to their respective locations around the base.

“I know, but…”

“You are stubborn, like me.”

“Indeed. I will assist in bringing our crew back.” Spock cupped Jim’s cheeks with his hand. “Please be safe, las’hark.”

Jim leaned in and kissed Spock.

“Mate of Spock, are you ready to go?” Jaylah appeared with the PX40 bike and asked.

Jim pulled back and looked at their new friend. “It’s Jim.”

“Jim, mate of Spock, are you ready?”

“No, Just Jim. No mate of Spock at the end. Just Jim.”

“Just Jim, it is time to go.” She pushed the bike onto the transporter pad.

Spock felt his mate’s amusement through their bond.

Mate of Spock was a fine name.

Oh, be quiet. Jim kissed him again before moving past and getting onto the bike. Jaylah hesitated then went to Spock.

“Do I permission to ride with Just Jim?”

“Oh c’mon,” Jim sighed much to Spock’s amusement.

“You may ride with him,” Spock told her.

Jim gave him a look. “We are so talking about this later.”

“Certainly. Good luck.” Spock watched Jim, Jaylah, and the bike materialize away before he and Bones took their place on the pad and waited.


After rescuing their crew, the regrouped on the bridge. Uhura and Sulu relayed Krall’s plan for attacking Yorktown and what the Abornath was capable of. Jaylah told them to take her house and make it fly. While Scotty went on about how the ship was built in space and not for taking off in the atmosphere, Spock looked out the viewscreen and saw the swarm.

“Captain,” Spock called his mate.

Everyone turned towards the screen. Jim walked closer. “Shit, he’s launching.”

“Attacking Yorktown may be just the beginning,” Spock spoke. “Armed with the Abornath, he could use this bio-weapon to rid the base of all life and then use the Yorktown’s advanced technology to attack an untold number of Federation plants.” How dare he go after the Yorktown. My parents are there.

Spock, we’ll get him. Jim nodded. “We’re just going to have to get this thing flying then.”

Scotty took a step forward, “We cannot just jumpstart it sir! This isn’t that motorbike.”

Spock watched his mate turn to Scotty and give him a ‘oh, just watch me’ look. Spock nearly smiled.


Jim’s plan to drop the ship down the side of the cliff was met with skepticism by some, but Spock backed his mate in the plan as did Sulu. They went to their respective stations and got started with getting the ship up and running.

When everyone was ready and secure, Jim said, “Call it, Mr. Sulu.”

“Aye-aye, Captain,” Sulu replied.

The ship roared to life under them as more impulse was added. The ship soon lurched forward, rocked for a moment, before dropping down and falling fast to the ground.

Spock, tell me this is going to work, Jim said to his mate.

I do not have the confidence to tell you that, t’hy’la.

Can you lie and say it will?

Jim, this is going to work, Spock hopefully lied.




Oh thank god! Jim mentally screamed as the ship missed the ground and soared up and up, breaking the atmosphere and entering space.

See Jim it worked, Spock told him.

Jim looked behind him to Spock and smirked.


“I’m picking up distress signals from every frequency coming from Yorktown,” Uhura announced a little while later. “Krall has already started his attack.”

My parents. Sulu’s family…Spock thought about them. He clenched his fists. Perhaps, like Khan, he could…

No, Spock, I’ll deal with Krall. You are injured.

But…my parents.

You are injured.

Spock gave his mate a look but nodded.

Jim comm’d Scotty. “What kind of weapons do you we have on here?”

“Uh…pulsed phase cannons and spatial torpedoes.”

Spock watched Jim make a face at that. They weren’t the best weapons.

“Great,” Jim said. “Lock and load.”

“It does not matter,” Jaylah spoke up thru Scotty’s comm. “You cannot defeat the bees.”

Spock looked up from his station and quired a brow. Bees.

Yeah, she said bees Spock, what of it? “Maybe we can lure them away,” Jim suggested. Jim pinched the bridge of his nose. “How do we give Yorktown time to get people to safety?”

Bees, bees, bees…I once read a book about bees…Spock thought.

Spock? Jim gave his mate a look.

“We can’t,” Sulu spoke. “We’re a horse and buggy compared to those swarm ship things.”


Spock, seriously, what is with you and the bees comment Jaylah made. 

I once read a book about bees. Actually, several books. They were my books. Mother had…

“We’re barely holding together as it is, Captain,” Sulu continued

“Spock,” Jim suddenly snapped out loud causing the bridge crew to look at him. “Sorry. Look, Spock, keeps thinking about bees.”

Spock nodded and stood up. “Yes, I was. Captain, the flight patterns of bees are determined by individual decisions.” He walked over to his mate. “Krall’s swarm formations are too complex not to rely on some form of unified cyberpathic coordination. I surmise that if we…”

“Spock, skip to the end please.”

“I think what he’s saying is that if we disorient the swarm,” Uhura said, standing up and marching over. “we can kick its ass.”

Jim raised a brow and looked to his mate. “Are you saying we can kicks its ass, Spock?”


“Yes what?” Jim grinned.

Spock internally sighed. “We can kick its ass.”

Uhura chuckled and patted Spock on the arm.

“Scotty,” Jim turned back to the comms. “Can you beam me onto one of those swarm ships?”

Scotty fussed back but eventually said he could. Jim went to leave the bridge but Spock stopped him. “Captain, my familiarity of the interior of those ships, makes me more qualified for this away mission.”

“No, you are still hurt,” Jim said. “I’ll do…”

“No, Jim, I will go and I propose that I be accompanied by someone with familiarity of both the ship and my injury.”

Jim thought about it for a moment before smirking. “Oh, he’s going to love this.” Jim went to the comm and hailed Bones. “Oh, Bonesy?”

“What?” Bones answered.

“I need some assistance in the transporter room. Meet me there please.”

“Fine, be there in a moment.”

He is not going to love this, Jim, Spock said.

I know.


Spock internally chuckled a moment later as he stood on the transporter pad and waited for Bones to stop having a hissy fit about the proposed mission. Jim was merely smiling in response to Bones’ many, many grievances.

“Come along, Doctor,” Spock called. “Time is a critical factor.”

Bones turned and marched over to him. “Why, you green-blooded ingrate. This was your idea!”

“Indeed, it was,” Spock replied. “I thought we could use more time together.”

“I don’t need any more time with you!”

Jim walked up to them and handed Bones a phaser. “It’s a good idea, Bonesy.”

Bones pointed the phaser with the wrong end at Spock. “You know, next time you have a piece of pipe stuck in your transverse, call a plumber.”

“Have fun and be safe,” Jim said. He placed his hand on the back of Spock’s neck and pulled him in for a quick kiss. “Just make sure you find a way to break those things.”

“I shall, ashayam.”

Jim stepped back and Spock called ‘energize’. Bones stared to fuss again. They reappeared a second later in one of the ships. Bones and Spock immediately opened the hatches and out flew the two beings from the ship. They closed the hatch and went to their respective positions—Bones to the pilot seat and Spock to the computer.

“You do realize that the last time I flew one of these things we crashed. So, don’t blame me if we…whoa!” The ship knocked into another causing Spock to stumble. He looked over his shoulder at Bones.

Not mine at all.


“Spock to Franklin,” Spock hailed the ship. “From what I ascertain, the ships do indeed share a cyberpathic link which coordinates their actions. Patching it through now.”

After some back and forth, a disruptive communication signal was chosen from Jaylah’s music box. Jim had the ship get close and fired on a few and soon a wave of the swarm ships was heading right towards the Franklin.

“Spock, Bones, stand by to drop out of formation,” Jim told them.

“Aye, Captain,” Spock replied.

“Let’s make some noise,” Jim said.

Spock immediately recognized the beats and shouting song Jaylah had put on as it came through their communication system of the swarm ship. Spock shook his head. Jim was fond of this song. Blasted it a few times a week in their apartment before their mission and occasionally in their quarters.

“That’s a good choice.”

“It isn’t,” Spock and Bones said at the same time as Bones knew the song as well.

“But hopefully it’ll fuck with the swarm,” Bones added.

“Indeed,” Spock agreed.


The swarm was decimated by Beastie Boys but Spock still read that three ships made it into Yorktown. Spock and Bones were ordered to keep on him, which Spock was happy to oblige. He wanted his hands on Krall for harming his crew.

They crashed through the opening Krall made with the Franklin hot on their heels. They zoomed down one of the arms of the Yorktown, following after Krall and the other two ships.

Krall and the ships dove up out of the water above them and Bones followed after. They knocked into a few buildings in their pursuit.

Spock relayed that capturing all three ships would be problematic. Jim told them to make sure the ships headed for the plaza and they did.

Bones and Spock sighed in relief when the Franklin rose from the water and the three ships ran right into it.

“Now how the hell do we land this thing?” Bones asked.

“I do not know,” Spock replied. “Carefully I would imagine.”

“Oh, shut up.”

Jim, have you found Krall? Is he dead?”

There were hull breeches. We found a few bodies but no Krall. Uhura said he does this energy transference thing. We’ve locked down the ship and contacted Yorktown security.

Bones and I will check around the plaza.

“Do not land,” Spock told him.

“Couldn’t if I wanted to.”

“Search the plaza for any signs of Krall.”

“He’s not dead?”

“There is no sign of him but there are two deceased crewmen where his ship breached the Franklin.”

“Shit. Alright, alright, coming around back to the plaza.”


Balthazar Edison, Jim came through a few moments later.

The captain of the Franklin? Spock replied.

Balthazar is Krall. Uhura recognized his voice in the archival video.

He would be…

Well, he’s not dead. That energy transference must have something to do with it. Look around for him. Jim sent a mental image of Balthazar to Spock.

“Bald, black male, human looking, possibly in Starfleet attire,” Spock relayed to Bones.


“Krall is the captain from the Franklin. Be on the lookout for him.”

The circled around the plaza but did not find anyone matching that description.

Spock, change of plans. I’m heading up to the maintenance tower. Krall will be there.

Jim, I suggest…

Spock, I know you want to get your possessive hands on him, but I’ve got this. Stay with Bones and give me backup.

Aye, Captain.

“Change of plans, Doctor,” Spock spoke. “Head up to the maintenance tower.”

“I take it Jim is up there.”


“And Krall.”


“Alright.” Bones maneuvered the ship around and up to the maintenance tower. They watched Jim enter the glass chamber and fire upon Krall who was now human looking and in a yellow command top.

“Why are they talking?” Bones questioned. “Just fire on him, Jim.”

“Doctor, you know Jim will take a prisoner alive if he can.” I would get my bare hands on Krall and…

Spock, stop.




But my parents are there and you are there and…Spock stopped then they saw Krall hit Jim and move up the shaft into the antigravity chamber. Jim righted himself and went after him, knocking into Krall and causing them to float upwards in the chamber.

Spock growled and clenched his fists watched Krall pin his mate to the top of the chamber and repeatedly punch his Jim.

“Easy, Spock,” Bones told him. “Jim’s a fighter, you know he’ll get the upper hand.”





“No!” Spock growled as his mate and Krall crashed through the chamber’s glass wall and flew out into the gravitational slipstream. They flew around before grabbing a hold of a tower and hanging on. Jim and Krall stood up and started talking again.

“Fire at Krall,” Spock ordered.

Before Bones could move to a line of sight, Krall jumped into the slipstream and headed back to the core.

“Dammit,” Bones and Spock said at the same time.

“Do you think Jim is…yep, he’s jumped too,” Bones sighed.

“Follow,” Spock ordered.

Jim made it back to Krall in time to see the device activated and throw up into the chamber. They watched, not knowing what to do as Jim and Krall struggled below the chamber for the upper hand. Jim knocked Krall down and went up into the chamber and started messing with buttons and levels.

They opened the comm as they heard what Scotty had to relay to Jim about getting out of the chamber in time.

“Dammit, Jim, you won’t make it out in time,” Bones fussed.

“Stay close to Jim,” Spock said. “Captain, we are here to assist in anyway.”

“Got it, just…standby.”

They soon heard an alert sound through Scotty’s comm. The last hatch Jim needed to open wouldn’t open. Spock clenched his fists.

Jim, t’hy’la…

Spock, can’t talk now.

I love you.

Love you, too!

Krall floated up into the chamber behind Jim. Jim, behind you.

Kind of busy.

Krall is…Spock stopped as Krall tried to stab Jim with a piece of glass only for his mate to kick Krall back and into the weapon.

The hatch opened and sucked Krall and the weapon out. Jim managed to flick the last switch and was then sucked out after Krall.

“Intercept!” Spock ordered. Moving to one of the doors in their ship.

“Got him!”

Spock opened the door in time to grab his mate’s hand and pull him into the ship. They dropped down inside the ship when the door closed behind them. Jim caught his breath and smiled slightly. “Hey, honey.”


“What would I do without you?”

“I do not know.”

“Die, probably,” Bones spoke up from the pilot seat.

Spock shook his head then pulled Jim into his lap and hugged him.



Jim sighed and hugged him back. “So possessive.”

“He hurt you.”

“I’m fine.”

“Fine has variable definitions.”

“I’m adequate,” Jim said instead.

Spock hugged his mate tighter and nuzzled into Jim’s neck. “Mine.”


“Mine. All mine.”

“Yeah, yeah, and you’re mine too.”

Chapter Text

Age 32 Part 3

When they finally managed to land, Jim and Spock went to debrief the admiralty of Yorktown. When it was done, Spock led Jim away to a private conference room and had him sit down.

“Spock, I thought we’d go check on your parents and Selik.”

Spock sat down next to his mate, facing him, and shook his head. “Jim, before…before all of this started there was something I was…I needed to tell you but was afraid to.”

Jim looked at him then gave him a small smile. “I know, Spock.”

Spock blinked. “You know?”

“Yes. I know that…” Jim’s breath hitched. “I know that Selik—that Spock has passed.”

“Jim, how did…”

Jim took Spock’s hands in his. “I went back later to look at the message but found it had been moved from our shared message inbox. You hid it from me so I searched for it and found it and watched it.”

“Why did you not tell me you knew?”

“Because I know you. I know you hid it for a reason and that you weren’t taking the news well.”

“No, I was not. You, though, seem to be taking it better.”

Jim shrugged. “I’m really not. I’ve just…I don’t know…been around so much death in my life that sometimes it takes a while for the news to sink in.”

Spock nodded in agreement.

“I mean, I did cry. Seeing your mom and dad upset in the message upset me. I’ll probably cry more once we meet your parents and see what Selik left us.”

“I am sorry I did not tell you and you had to find out on your own, ashayam,” Spock said. He looked down at their hands. “I do have more to tell you.”

“As do I, but first,” Jim stood up and pulled Spock up with him. “I’m starting to hurt and I do want to see your parents. And plus, I think Bones wants you in medbay for a full work up to make sure you’re okay.”

Spock arched a brow. Jim smiled. “Alright, I want you in medbay for a full work up to make sure you’re okay.”

“If you insist.”

“I do.” They shared a kiss then left together.


After medbay, Jim and Spock went to the Vulcan consulate and met with Amanda and Sarek. They were hugged tightly by Amanda until Spock winced as his side was still sore.

“Spock? Are you okay?” Amanda asked.

“I am, mother, I was injured and…”

“Oh, my goodness! Injured! Sit down, now, and rest.”

“Mother, I…”

“Spock, listen to your mother,” Sarek interjected before coaxing Spock to sit down on the couch.

“How were you injured? Are you okay now? Why aren’t you in medbay?” Amanda questioned.

“He had a piece of something stuck in his left side, but he is alright now,” Jim said, sitting next to Spock.

“A piece of something stuck in him!” Amanda said loudly. She sat next to Spock and tried pulling up the left side of his shirt.

“Mother, please, I am well,” Spock tried but his father joined in and soon his shirt was halfway off and his parents were inspecting his wound much to Jim’s amusement. Spock gave his mate a look before hissing slightly when the sensitive area was poked.

“Sorry, kan-bu,” his mother said. His shirt was put back down. “Sweetie, are you feeling well?”

“Yes, Mother. Leonard is quite skilled even with the barebones of medical equipment.”

“He better be,” Sarek muttered.

“Sa-mekh,” Spock sighed.

Amanda stood up and touched Jim’s cheek gently. The cuts on his face had been healed but the signs of a black eye were starting to show. “And you? Are you well? Why do you still have a black eye?”

“I’m alright, too, Amanda. I like the black eye.”

“Illogical,” Amanda, Sarek, and Spock said.

Jim shook his head and asked, “How are you both holding up?”

Amanda and Sarek sat down across from them. “Oh, we’re doing okay. Luckily, we were far enough away from the chaos earlier. Although Sarek was close to throwing me over his shoulder, commandeering a ship and flying off with me for safe keeping.”

“Logical,” Spock said.

“Affirmative,” Sarek agreed.

Jim and Amanda shared a light laugh. Afterwards, Amanda’s eyes turned sad. “Other than that, we are still processing everything.”

“Me too,” Jim said with a sniffle. “After everything is cleaned up here we’ll come with you both to New Vulcan for a little while.”

“Good. I want my boys where I can keep an eye on them.”

“Indeed,” Sarek agreed.


A half hour later, after some tea and a light lunch with Amanda and Sarek, Jim yawned and Spock felt his eyelids getting a bit heavy.

“Do you mind if we cut this a little short?” Jim asked with a smile. “Spock and I haven't been able to shower in a few days and I’d like to change into something clean.”

“As its your birthday, yes, you can do that,” Amanda replied.

Jim and Spock blinked. Spock looked at his mate. “Yes, it is your birthday. Happy birthday.”

“Oh, okay.”

“Oh, okay?” Spock repeated. He shook his head.

Jim chuckled. “I didn’t realize the date. We’ll do something on Spock’s birthday, okay?”

“Yes,” Amanda and Sarek agreed.

“But…” Spock tried but shut up at the looks his family members gave him. Sarek then handed over the box that Sarek had left them. Spock took the box and he and Jim left after giving quick hugs.


A few hours later, Jim and Spock sat on the bed of their temporary residence together. They had had to stop and pick up a few new clothes from a nearby shop as well as a few things they would need for the night and the next few days. All their stuff had been on the Enterprise.

They had gotten baths and thoroughly clean before deciding to look into what Selik had left them.

Spock placed the box between them on the bed. Spock slowly opened it revealing a red cloth of fabric first. Jim gently picked it up and ran his hands over the Vulcan script on the cloth.

“What’s it say?” he asked.

“Nam-tor nash ozhika t’nash-veh,” Spock replied. “This is my logic.”

Jim put the cloth to the side as Spock pick up another cloth, one he recognized as a sash his counterpart was prone to wearing with robes. Wrapped inside the sash was a rectangle box. He slid it open and found a photo.

“Oh wow,” Jim said softly. “That must’ve been us…his us. Our other counterparts.”

“Indeed. His crew. His family.” He touched the photo, moving a finger across his counterpart’s face, younger face to the blonde man’s face who sat in the captain’s chair.

“His t’hy’la,” Jim said. “My counterpart.”

 Spock moved his finger away. “I see similarities. Differences too.”

“My hair doesn’t curl like his is doing. And my eyes are bluer.”

Spock nodded. “Also, he is older and…more well fed than you.”

Jim looked at him. “More well fed? You calling him fat?”

“Certainly not. He is beautiful as are you.”

“But I’m not as well fed?” Jim asked with a small smile.

“That is not…I just…”

Jim chuckled and kissed his cheek. “Yeah, yeah, I got it. But I’m fit and I don’t plan on…plumping up anytime soon.”

How disappointing, Spock thought. 

“Spock, I work out a lot and I got some of that Khan blood. I don’t think I’ll be plumping up anytime soon. Hopefully never.”

“Of course.” Spock then paused and looked over Jim’s body. “But if you do put on weight in your later years…I would not mind.”

Jim’s smile turned into a grin. “Chubby chaser, Spock?”

Spock’s cheeks tinted green. “As your mate, I would love you no matter what. That is all that I am saying on the matter.”

“You’re weird, Spock. And I won’t be plumping up any time soon.”

“Of course.”

Jim looked back to the picture. “Look at everyone. We…they look good.”


Jim touched his finger tip to Ambassador Spock’s face. “You get handsome in your older age.”

Spock arched a brow. “Am I not handsome now?”

Jim chuckled. “You’re cute now.”

No, I am handsome.

A cutie patootie handsome Vulcan.

You are illogical.

Jim took the photo from Spock and placed it back in the box. He then pulled out a pendent. “What’s this?”

“I do not know.”

Jim pressed a button in the middle. It was a holo-emitter, they found out, as emitting from the pendent was a moving image of Jim’s older counterpart. Older looking than in the picture they had just seen.

Kirk Prime smiled. “I know you’re going to say this is illogical, but it’s your birthday, dear, so herd you go. Happy birthday to you,” Kirk Prime started to sing. Jim leaned against his mate, holding the pendent before them. Spock wrapped an arm around his mate as he felt water welling up in his eyes.

“…happy birthday to you, happy birthday dear Spock, happy birthday to you, my love.”

“Oh,” Jim sniffled.

Kirk Prime laughed lightly. “I know, it's illogical to celebrate something you had nothing to do with. Birthdays are illogical you always say, yet you always give me something for my birthday and I always treasure those gifts. I’ll miss you while you are off on your first ambassadorial mission. My husband, the ambassador.”

Kirk Prime laughed lightly again. “I wish I could be with you always, but we have our duties that sometimes keep us apart, but you’ll come back to me. You always do just as I always come back to you. I just wanted to make something for you to keep when I’m not with you.”

Kirk tapped his temple. “We have our bond and I’ll never shut you out of my head just as you never shut me out of yours. We’ll be together, parted from me and never parted, never and always touching and touched.”

Spock blinked back a few tears as he felt a wetness on his shoulder. His mate was crying as well.

Kirk Prime continued. “I suppose I'd always imagined us outgrowing Starfleet together. Watching life swing us into our Emeritus years. I look around at the new cadets now and can't help thinking has it really been so long? Wasn't it only yesterday we stepped onto the Enterprise as boys?

I know what you'd say, `It's their turn now, Jim' And of course you're right... but it got me thinking: Who's to say we can't go one more round? By the last tally, only twenty five percent of the galaxy's been chartered. I'd call that negligent. Criminal even—an invitation. You once said being a starship captain was my first, best destiny...if that's true, then yours is to be by my side. If there's any true logic to the universe...we'll end up on that bridge again.”

Jim leaned into Spock’s side more and sniffled.

Kirk Prime grinned. “Admit it, Spock. For people like us, the journey itself... is home. T’hy’la, I love you. I cherish you. I hope you have a safe journey and come home to me as soon as you can. Live long and prosper.”

The message cut off and Spock and Jim were left staring at the pendent now. Tears streamed down Spock’s cheeks.

“Spock,” Jim said softly.

“Yes, t’hy’la,” Spock replied just as softly.

“I wanted to leave the Enterprise.”

“I did as well.”

“I was going to take a Vice Admiral position here.”

“I wanted to go to New Vulcan and continue Ambassador Spock’s work.”




The couple slowly turned and looked at one another. Both looked sad and guilty.

“Do you…” Jim started. He licked his bottom lip. “Do you still want to leave?”

Spock shook his head. “I want to be with you, wherever that may be, ashal-veh. I am not ready to be an ambassador or parted from you. And you? Do you still wish to be the Vice Admiral?”

Jim shook his head as well. “No, I…I thought…”

“The reason you were down these past few months,” Spock interrupted. “You were not joking about wanting to do something else. You said you were in a rut.”

“And I was. I was, I guess, lost in the vastness of space. I forgot why we’re doing what we’re doing.” Jim smiled. “Vice admirals don’t fly and there is no fun in that.”


“So, we’re both staying. Together?”

“Yes. I would still like the two of us to spend an extended time on New Vulcan. We will have some leave while the new ship is being completed.”

Jim chuckled. “Do you think they’ll give us the new ship?”

“Why wouldn’t they?” Spock replied with a quirked eyebrow. “The best ship in the fleet, for the best crew. My crew.”

“Our crew,” Jim corrected.

“Yes, ours.” But mainly mine. My ship, my crew, my family. Spock couldn’t help but take Jim’s hand. “My Captain.”

“My first officer.” Jim leaned forward and the couple shared a chaste kiss. 

“You did not respond to my wanting to go to New Vulcan.”

“We’ll go.” Jim then yawned. “But first, its my birthday and all I want to do is sleep until your birthday.” Jim laid back and carefully got under the covers as Spock put the items back in the box. He saw another picture at the bottom of the box and picked it up while Jim made himself comfortable.

It was a photo of their counterparts together. Jim looked a little older than the how he looked in the holo-emitter. They were in civilian clothes. Spock wearing dark pants and a sweater while Jim wore jeans and a flannel button up shirt. Their arms were around each other’s waste. Jim was smiling at the camera while Spock’s eyes were focused on Jim with a soft smile on his features.

“Riverside,” Jim said.

Spock looked to his mate laying beside him. Jim pointed at the picture. “I recognize the barn in the background. My dad’s parents had a farm near the property I grew up on. That barn was there.”

“Perhaps they found time together on the farm after retirement.”

“Maybe. They’re together now, though. Wherever that may be.”

Spock nodded. He put the picture back in the box with the other items before placing the box on the bedside table. He got under the covers and laid down. Jim cuddled up against him.

“How’s your side?” Jim asked, gently placing his hand over Spock’s heart.


“Don’t go getting stabbed with anything again, okay?”

“I shall attempt not to. Happy Birthday, t’hy’la.” Spock kissed Jim’s forehead. “Goodnight.”

“Nighty, night, Spockums.”


Two days later, Spock decided that birthdays were logical—very logical. He let out a groan and opened his eyes. He looked down his body and bit his bottom lip at the sight.

His mate was delivering on his birthday blowjob tradition. Jim’s mouth was sealed around the base of his cock. The whole member fit snuggly in his mate’s mouth and throat; Jim’s nose brushing into Spock’s thick bush.

He raised a hand and gently cupped Jim’s cheek as the blonde hummed around him, his plump pink, luscious lips stretched wide around Spock’s base. His arousal twitched at the ministrations as Jim hummed and sucked before slowly sliding his mouth back up Spock’s cock until it slipped out.

“Happy birthday,” Jim said. His hand joined in, stroking Spock’s hard shaft, rubbing his thumb against the double ridges. The tip started leaking and Jim licked it, laving it with attention—tasting his mate. From there, Jim trailed kisses and little nibbles down the cock’s side. Working his way back up, he came to the double ridges and showered them with pleasurable attention.  

“Jim,” Spock sigh, letting his eyes flutter closed.

Jim moved his mouth back to the head and swallowed Spock down. Spock threw his head back as Jim’s hot, moist cavern surrounded him. Jim!

That is my name, Jim replied. His mate started to bob his head expertly, working Spock like a professional. Spock opened his eyes and raised a hand, resting it on Jim’s head. He didn’t grip his mate’s soft hair but carded his hand through the locks in an encouraging way. Jim moaned and groaned around Spock like he couldn’t live without his cock in his mouth. Jim’s sucked, licked, and nibbled his dick in all the right places.

Spock clenched his other hand in the sheets as it took everything he had not to just start pounding into Jim’s mouth and throat. He kept his eyes on Jim. Jim’s full lips wrapped around him made Spock growl loudly. Those bright blue eyes would occasionally look up to him for reassurance. Spock couldn’t help that his mouth dropped open and he slightly panted as Jim blew him.  Spock’s hand in Jim’s hair tightened slightly as the familiar tingles of heat grew in his abdomen.

“Jim,” Spock grunted.

Wanna take charge?

Spock nodded enthusiastically. It was his birthday after all.

Jim popped off Spock’s cock and licked from base to ridges to head where he suckled and teased his top, swallowing some of the leaking pre-cum “Go for it, birthday boy.”

Spock growled and fanned his hands on the sides of Jim’s head. He pulled Jim’s mouth down on his cock. He thrust into Jim’s sinful, waiting mouth. Jim sealed his lips around Spock and sucked as the Vulcan started pumping his hips up.

“Jim,” Spock groaned. His eyes were glued to watching his long, thick erection sliding in and out of Jim’s warm mouth. Jim was looking up at him with those big blue eyes and Spock felt himself grow close to climax.

He started thrusting into the willing cavern, pulling the blonde’s head down to meet the movements. Jim hummed around Spock once more, the vibrations sending Spock over the edge. Spock cried out Jim’s name as he buried himself in his mate’s mouth and blew his load.

Spock dropped his head back onto the pillow and laid there panting as he felt Jim swallow around him. He let go of Jim’s head. Jim sat up and licked his lips. Spock blinked and looked to his beautiful mate.

“Good birthday so far?” Jim asked, his voice a bit rough from the job he had just undertaken. Jim leaned over and started peppering kisses up Spock’s chest to his mouth.

Spock nodded.

“Care to return the favor as I didn’t get a birthday blowjob?”

Spock nodded again. Jim grinned before sitting up and adjusting himself to straddle Spock’s shoulders and rub his own arousal against Spock’s lips.


Later that evening, Spock walked with Jim and Bones down a hallway in one of the Starfleet buildings on Yorktown.

Jim held Spock’s hand and squeezed. “Our shuttle for New Vulcan with your parents leaves tomorrow afternoon.”

“I am aware,” Spock replied.

“How long with ya’ll be gone?” Bones asked. “And will ya’ll even be coming back?”

“Well, the new ship won’t be ready for three months so maybe a month or two.” Jim looked at Spock. “How does that sound?”

“Acceptable.” Spock looked to Bones. “Jim and I finally talked. We will be returning to Starfleet.”

“Indeed,” Jim agreed.

“So no going off and making little Vulcans, Spock?” Bones asked.

Jim stopped walking and looked to his mate. “What?”

Spock and Bones stopped as well and turned to Jim. Spock blinked as Bones chuckled.

“Little Vulcans?” Jim questioned. He crossed his arms over his chest. “Spock. Oh god, is that why you had the strange image of me pregnant a few days ago? I just thought it was because of blood loss.”

Spock blinked again. “I um…while children would be lovely, I do understand that you would not be pregnant. My leaving, as you know, was not based on making little Vulcans. If I am to procreate, it will be with you and only you.”

“Damn right. But with a surrogate.”

“Affirmative.” Spock looked back to Bones, changing the subject. “You are welcome to join us, Leonard.”

“Is New Vulcan hot as balls?”

Spock quirked a brow. Jim chuckled and replied, “Yes.”

“Then I’ll pass. I’ve already talked to my ex and she’s brining Joanna here for an extended stay. Carol’s been wanting all three of us to spend some time together. Joanna has only met her a few times but seems to like her.”

“That’s great, Bonesy. Can’t believe she’s a preteen.”

“No, she’s eleven. Not a preteen.” Bones sighed. “God, I can’t believe I have an eleven-year-old.”

“Neither can I. Hey, where are you leading us? Amanda and Sarek said to meet them for dinner soon.”

“Dinner is this way. I found a nice little spot around the corner so c’mon.”

They continued walking down the hall. They turned a corner and immediately a chorus of ‘SURPRISE! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!’ greeted them.

Jim nearly jumped back as he and Spock took in the sight of their whole crew—their space family and their friends dressed up nicely in the large room along with Amanda and Sarek.

“I know you said ya’ll didn’t want a party,” Bones spoke. “But I couldn’t resist.”

“It’s alright,” Jim chuckled. A waiter appeared and held out a tray with some glasses of a champagne looking liquid. Carol came over and stood next to Bones as they each took a champagne flute.

Spock eyed the bubbly beverage in his hand as Bones started loudly singing, ‘Happy Birthday to you…” the rest of the group joined in and soon everyone was singing to the birthday boys.

Birthdays are illogical. Celebrating something one has nothing to do with, Spock thought.

Would you rather they were singing ‘congrats on expelling from your mother’s vag…’

Cease! Spock fussed, narrowing his eyes at his mate.

Jim lightly laughed as their friends and family wrapped up the singing and clapped. Jim stepped closer to Spock and wrapped his arm around the Vulcan’s waist. He raised his glass. Spock did too, as well as their friends and family.

“Thanks everybody,” Jim said.

“Yes, thank you,” Spock added. “But this is illogical and…”

“Ignore him,” Jim interrupted.

Do not ignore me. Birthdays are illogical.

Again, do you want to keep getting blowjobs.





Jim shook his head and continued his speech. “To the Enterprise.”

“To the Enterprise,” they repeated.

“And to…absent friends,” Jim added.

“Here’s to that,” Bones spoke.

“Cheers,” everyone said before taking a drink.

“Now, I really hope there is cake,” Jim said.

That earned a round of chuckles.

Jim frowned. “Seriously, is there no cake?”

Amanda walked up and took Jim’s arm. “Yes, of course there’s cake but please eat something from the buffet first. You and Spock slept all through yesterday.”

“Most of us did, ma’am,” Bones spoke.

“Indeed,” Spock added. “It had been a tiring few days.

“Well now that you have rested, it is time to eat something substantial. C’mon,” Amanda grabbed Spock’s arm and pulled him and Jim along.


After eating and doing his rounds and talking to his friends and family, Spock found his mate standing before the floor to ceiling glass window overlooking the new ship’s building progress. He came to stand by his mate’s side and saw Jim had a plate with a slice of cake on it.

Spock arched a brow. “Is that not your second helping?”

Jim shoved a piece of the cake into his mouth with a fork and shrugged. Its good cake. Vanilla with whipped icing. Jim dipped the fork into the cake and then held out a piece to Spock. Spock ate the offered piece.

“Hm, yes, it is good,” Spock agreed.

“It’s been a whirlwind few days,” Jim said between finishing the piece cake.

“It has.”

“I miss him. Hell, I miss all of our crew that we lost.”

“As do I,” Spock agreed. He took Jim’s empty plate and tossed it into a nearby trash bin.

Jim leaned against Spock’s side. “That’s our new ship.”

“Affirmative. It is the USS Yorktown.” Spock put his arm around Jim.

“I don’t think so.”

“Yes, that is…”

“Nah, it’ll be the Enterprise.”

“But the…”

“Enterprise, Spock. Our ship will always be called Enterprise.”

Spock internally chuckled. “Of course.”

Bones and their crew walked up to stand beside him. “So that’s our new ship,” Bones said. “Looks bigger.”

“Bigger and better,” Scotty said in awe. “Can’t wait to get my hands on her nacelles.”

What is with him and nacelles? Spock wondered, his hand sliding down to Jim’s ass.

What’s with you and touching my ass all the time? Jim countered.

It is mine. Spock couldn’t help but give it a squeeze before sliding his hand back to rest on Jim’s lower back.

Whatever. “It’ll be fun,” Jim said out loud. “Getting back out there. Especially now that we know our way through the nebula.”

“Can you imagine what we’ll find?” Uhura spoke.

“Aliens hell-bent on killing us,” Bones said gruffly. “Deadly spaceborne viruses and bacteria? Incomprehensible cosmic anomalies that could wipe us our in an instant! New things Jim will be allergic to. Yeah, it’ll be oodles of fun.”

Spock eyed the doctor. Not mine.

Spock, he’s your friend.

Uhura is my friend.

Everyone in this room is your friend.

They are my crew and my parents.

Our crew is our family, Spock, and Bones is a part of your crew so he is yours.

Spock nodded. Partially mine. You have full custody though.

Of course, Jim chuckled.

“Mate of Spock,” Jaylah appeared next to Jim.

Jim sighed. “Jaylah.” He and Spock turned towards her. Spock internally smiled. He liked that at least someone referred to Jim as his.

“Jaylah, please just call me Jim. Or James T. Or Captain Kirk. You do not need to call me mate of Spock.”

“It is part of your title, no?” Jaylah questioned. “Mr. Spock said that your full title was Captain James T Kirk, Mate of Spock.”

Spock looked to his feet as Jim turned and eyed him. “Did he now?”

“Yes, and he said referring to you when you are off duty as Mate of Spock would be acceptable.”


Spock lifted his head and looked his mate in the eyes. Jim was annoyed and slightly amused.

“My full title, huh?”

Spock opened his mouth then closed it. He could feel the eyes of their friends on them.

“Did Mr. Spock lie?” Jaylah asked, looking at Spock accusingly.

Jim shook his head. He focused back on Jaylah. “Vulcans are very possessive and territorial. If we were on Vulcan then Mate of Spock would come up as part of my…title.” You are in so much trouble, Spock. “So, as we are not on Vulcan, you can call me Jim. All my friends do.”

Jaylah smiled. “Yes, Jim, we are friends.”

“But, because Spock is Vulcan,” Uhura spoke up. “It is perfectly acceptable to call Spock, Mate of Jim.”

“What?” Spock questioned his friend.

Jim grinned. “Oh yes, even through we’re not on Vulcan, Vulcans are always referred to as mate of…who ever they are mated to.”

“No…” Spock tried as his parents approached.

“Yes, so Spock is Mr. Spock, Mate of Jim,” Uhura spoke over Spock.

“Just as Sarek,” Jim added. “Is Ambassador Sarek, mate of Lady Amanda.”

“Pardon?” Sarek questioned, his eye brows raised. Amanda chuckled and nodded.

“Yes, exactly,” Amanda agreed with Jim. Sarek eyed his wife then his son.

“I understand,” Jaylah spoke with a smile. “Mr. Spock, Mate of Jim…”

No, no, no…Spock thought.

“Actually, Captain Kirk,” Jim told her. “Mr. Spock, Mate of Captain Kirk would be the full title.”

Jaylah nodded. “Mr. Spock, Mate of Captain Kirk.” She turned to Sarek. “Ambassador Sarek, mate of Lady Amanda.”

“Yep,” Uhura, Amanda, Jim, Bones, and the rest of the crew minus Spock and Sarek said in agreement.

“Mate of Captain Kirk,” Bones chuckled. “I love it.”

“That’s for my tracking device,” Uhura muttered.

Spock frowned. Not mine. None of you are mine anymore.

Except Jim.

And my mother.

But the rest, not mine.

Spock turned back to view the new ship. Jim sidled up against him and kissed his cheek. “Love you, Spockums.”

“Mate of Captain Kirk,” Spock muttered.

Jim kissed his cheek again. “Hey, you brought it upon yourself.”

“It is my birthday.”

Would another blowjob make up for it?




Naughty cadet, Spock countered.

Fine, we’ll play naughty cadet, Mate of Captain Kirk.

Spock internally sighed. He only had himself to blame but at least they got to the play naughty cadet now.

Chapter Text

Age 37

Day 1

Spock’s eyes snapped open. In his side, his heart pounded. He looked around the dark room and only found Jim laying beside him. He had had no dreams—not even any from Jim’s side of the bond, but something was off. He touched his side and felt his heart still pounded for some reason.

He sat up and looked around the room again, but once more nothing unusual stood out. There were boxes littered around but that was all there was in his room. He touched the bed under him. It was his bed in his room in his apartment that he shared with his mate.

Mate, Spock thought. He looked back to Jim beside him. My mate. Spock touched Jim’s bare shoulder then his ass covered by the covers. All mine. Spock laid back down and cuddled up against Jim. Mine mine mine.

Jim stirred in his arms. “Spock, no sex right now. Wanna sleep.”

Spock blinked. Sex? Sex actually sounded good, really good, to Spock right now.

Jim stirred again and mumble, “Sleep, Spock. Sex in the morning.”

Spock nodded and scooted away. He laid on his back and stared up at the ceiling. His heart slowly calmed down to its normal rhythm but Spock still felt off, like something was just under his skin. He looked to Jim beside him.

My mate. He grabbed Jim’s ass again.

“Spock,” Jim whined. “It’s late. Sex in the morning.”

Spock squeezed the firm cheek then released it. It was his to touch later he figured. He folded his hands on his stomach and stared back up at the ceiling. The room suddenly felt too cold to him so he got out of bed and walked out of the room, down the hall to his meditation room. He shut the door behind him and raised the temperature in the room.

Spock sat down on his meditation mat and lit a few of his candles. He crossed his legs and rested his hands in his lap before closing his eyes and taking in a deep breath.


“You okay?” Jim asked in the morning as they sat together for breakfast.

Spock looked up from his plate of fruit. He furrowed his brows seeing his mate sitting there in just his underwear and was sweating. When had that happened? “Jim, are you okay?”

Blue eyes looked back at him. “Well, the temperature in the apartment is like ten degrees more than I’m comfortable with which is why I’m asking you, are you okay?”

“Yes, my apologies.” Spock stood up and went to the wall temperature controller. He turned the temperature down several degrees. Cool air immediately filled their apartment. Spock couldn’t help but shiver. Spock went back to the table and sat down. His mate eyed him. “I am okay. I was meditating last night and thought I had only raised the temperature of that room.”

His mate nodded. “Okie dokie.” Jim stood and walked away towards the kitchen. Spock stared at his mate’s bare back and his ass in those tight underwear.


Spock blinked. He was somehow in the kitchen with Jim bent over the island. Spock stepped back and shook his head. “My apologies.” Why did I do that? When did I get up from the table? Why must Jim wear such alluring underwear. I should take them off of him.

Spock! Jim straightened up and turned to look at him. “Seriously, Spock, what’s up.”


“That tent in your pants says otherwise.”

Spock looked down at himself. He was aroused. When did that happen?

Spock, what is up? Jim asked him.

Spock shook his head. “I do not know. I am…not myself today.” His eyes trailed up Jim’s body. He wanted desperately to pin Jim back to the kitchen island.

Jim stepped closer and cupped his cheek. Spock sighed at the contact and leaned into the touch. It soothed him. “God, Spock, you’re warm. Are you sick? How do you feel?”

The air in the room now felt too cold even thought a fire was starting to spread in Spock. “I…perhaps I am under the weather.”

“You did overdo it yesterday and the day before helping out with the Enterprise restocking.”

Spock nodded and stepped closer until he had Jim in his arms with his face buried in Jim’s neck. Jim smelled so good.

“How about you take today and rest?” Jim suggested. “I have to go back up to the Enterprise and oversee a few things before the start of our second five-year mission.”


Jim jumped in his arms at the loud response.  

Spock shook his head. He didn’t want Jim parted from him. He needed his mate with him. If Jim left, others would try and seduce him and then Spock would have to kill them. No, Jim needed to stay with Spock.

“Stay, please,” Spock said softer. “I do not feel well and I need you.”

Jim rubbed Spock’s back. “Okay, okay. I’ll stay.”


“C’mon, lets go lay down for a bit.”

Spock nodded but didn’t release his mate.



“You gotta let me go.”

“I do not want to.”

“Then how are we going to get to the bedroom to lay down?”

Spock picked Jim up and carried him to the bedroom. He laid them down and cuddled up behind his mate. He rubbed his nose along the Jim’s nape.

“You smell good.”

“Thanks,” Jim chuckled. “Its mostly sweat since you had the apartment like New Vulcan in here.”

“All mine.”

Jim patted his arms around his waist. “Yes, yes, yours. Now go to sleep and rest so you’ll feel better.”

Spock closed his eyes and found Jim was manipulating their bond to try and lull him to sleep. Spock tried to fight it but ended up yawning and soon conking out with Jim in his arms.


Spock woke with a start, sitting up in bed and looking around the room. His heart was once again pounding in his side. Jim wasn’t beside him and he found that several hours had passed since they had laid down together.

Jim! Where are you? Why did you leave me? Who are you with? Are they trying to steal you from me? I’ll kill them! You’re mine! Where are you?

Whoa, whoa, whoa, Spock! Chill out. I’m just up at the Enterprise with Bones and some of our crew.

Bones…Leonard. Our friend Leonard.

Yes, him.

If he touches you I shall rip off his arms.

What the hell, Spock? What is up with you?

I burn for you, t’hy’la. I need you.

Burn for me? What do you…oh! Oh god. Its that time, right? Your pon farr?

Spock blinked. He thought about it for a moment then nodded to himself. Yes.

Whoa. Wow, okay. Pon farr time! We got this. I’ll hurry up and finish here and come home and we’ll get down to business with the whole crazy, sexy mating time. Just give me an hour to…


Spock, we’re supposed to leave for our five-year mission in a few weeks. I need to finalize a few things. One hour and I’ll be home.

One hour, Spock repeated. He wrung his hands together. The burning was spreading through him.

Spock, one hour, I promise, Jim assured him. One hour and then I’ll come home and you can mate with me as much as you want. Okay?

Mate. One hour.

Yes, one hour, Spock. I feel you through our bond. You’re warm. I know. I need you too. I’ll be there soon.

Spock nodded to himself. One hour or else I will come get you and kill whoever is near you.

…Fine. One hour.


Spock didn’t make in two minutes before he was dressed in his blue science uniform and out of the apartment.

Fifteen minutes later, Spock was on a shuttle heading up to the starbase where their ship was dock. Spock also had a plan. A plan he was keeping blocked from his mate.

When the shuttle docked, Spock made a beeline to the Enterprise. He boarded through the cargo hatch while crew members were coming and going and made his way to the nearest turbolift. The lift took him to the highest floor possible. He got off and checked a nearby computer.

“Where is Captain Kirk?” he asked it.

“Medbay,” the computer replied.

Spock nodded. As much as he wanted to charge into medbay and take his mate, he needed to follow through on his plan. Spock walked down the corridor and to another turbolift, taking it down to engineering.

“Oh, Commander Spock,” Scotty greeted him as soon as he got off the lift. “Wasn’t expecting ya to be here today.”

“How is the ship?” Spock asked.

“Ship is great, Commander. Tip top shape. All ready for our next mission.”

“Is it ready to depart now?”

Scotty scratched the back of his head. “Well, of course, but we’re not cleared to depart for another…” Spock reached out and pinched the Scottish’s man’s neck. Scotty fell to the ground as Keenser and Kevin came around the corner.

“Scotty!” Keenser exclaimed, rushing over. He looked at his friend on the ground and then up to Spock. “What happened?”

“I believe there is a gas leak here,” Spock lied. “He passed out due to the smell.”

“Smell? What smell?” Kevin asked.

“You do not smell it?” Spock questioned. “It is quite potent. Perhaps the effects are already setting in with you.”

“Oh no,” they both said, touching their noises.

“You must evacuate the ship at once. Tell everyone you find they must leave. I will order a ship wide evacuation alarm. Take Mr. Scott with you.”

They nodded and each grabbed one of Scotty’s arms and started to drag him away.

Spock turned on his heel and went to a nearby comm unit. He punched in his clearance code. It was accepted. He then pressed a button, signally an alarm sound throughout the ship. “Attention, Enterprise and starbase personnel. This is Commander Spock. There is a gas leak in engineering. Evacuate immediately. That is an order. Evacuate immediately.”

Spock ended the transmission and put a lock in place in the computer to cease all further ship wide communications. He couldn’t have his mate undermining him right now.

Spock! What the hell are you doing on the ship? Jim’s voice came through their bond.

There is a leak. I will be on the bridge making sure everyone is leaving.

Spock, what the hell…Spock cut off their communication and headed for the bridge.


He walked off the lift and onto the Enterprise, finding his mate standing there along with Bones, Uhura, their new navigator and helmsman, and two security guards. Jim had his arms over his chest. Spock wanted to rush him and pin him to the ground. Spock walked closer and stood at arm’s length away.

“Spock, you are in a fever,” Jim said calmly. “What are you doing ordering a ship wide…” Spock reached out and pinched his mate’s neck. He caught Jim before he fell to the ground and lifted him into his arms as his friends gasped and the security guards drew their phasers.

“Spock, what the hell?” Bones snapped.

“I suggest you all leave or else,” Spock said as he slowly walked over to the captain’s chair and placed his unconscious mate in it. He pressed a button the harness unfolded out and locked Jim into the chair for safe keeping. Spock turned back to their friends and crew. They stood in the same spots although security had taken a few steps closer, phasers still raised and pointing at Spock.

“Spock, we know you’re not in a sound state of mind right now,” Uhura said, raising her hands to show she wasn’t a threat.

Spock eyed her. She was a threat. They all were. “I am satisfactory at the moment, but you all will not be if you continue to defy my orders. Leave my ship.”

“This is not your ship,” one of the security personal said taking another step closer. “This is Starfleet property and you…”

Spock moved quickly and swiftly—using his skill in Vulcan combat to knock the phasers out of the hands of the security guards and drop them both to the ground. Spock went for the phasers next and only managed to grab one. He straightened up and pointed the phaser at Uhura who had picked up the other one and had it aimed at him.

“Spock, stop this,” she said sternly.

“Nyota, you are my friend,” Spock replied. “You know what I am going through right now.” Spock’s hands started to shake. The fever was building up and making it hard for Spock to control himself. “I do not want to hurt you or anyone of my crewmembers, but I will if you get in my way.”

“We know you need to mate with Jim,” Bones spoke. “But taking the ship is not logical.”

“Logic is not dictating my actions at the moment, Leonard,” Spock snapped. “I need my mate. I need him away from all of you. You are challengers.” Spock narrowed his eyes. “Remove yourselves from my ship or I will remove you with my bare hands.”

“Alright, alright, we’ll leave,” Bones said. “But you gotta promise to not hurt Jim.”

Spock narrowed his eyes at Bones. “How dare you think I would hurt my mate. He is the most precious and beautiful being in the universe and he is all mine. My heart, my soul, my las’hark. I would never, ever hurt my Jim.”

“I know, but right now you’re acting a little crazy.”

“Only because you will not get off my ship!” Spock growled.

“We’re going!” Uhura told him. She tossed the phaser to the opposite side of the room. She and the others then started to back away from Spock to the bridge doors to leave.

“Wait,” Spock said. He pointed at the new navigator and helmsman. “You two stay for a moment. The rest leave now.”

The others quickly left, leaving two scared crewmen behind.

“We are no threat to you or Captain Kirk,” the navigator, a young Vulcan, said.

“I am aware,” Spock replied. He put the phaser down. “I merely need you to start the ship, put in coordinates, and engage the autopilot.”

The crewmen blinked.


Jim came to and found himself in his bed on the Enterprise. He slowly sat up and rubbed his neck where Spock had…

“Dammit, Spock,” Jim fussed.






Their bond was strangely quiet but Jim could feel a heat radiating through their bond. Oh, Spock. Jim got out of the bed and walked into the living room area before realizing something.

“Are we moving?”

Jim turned his head and looked out the window they had. Streaks of light were passing by.

“We’re moving!”

Spock, you are in so much trouble!

He left the room and went to a comm terminal. “Computer, where is Spock.”

“Observation Deck 2.”

“How many souls are on board?”


Jim nodded then went up to the bridge. He sighed seeing that they were at warp. He sat down in his chair and saw someone trying to hail them. Jim stood up again and went to Uhura’s station.

“How does this work.” Jim pressed a few buttons and then a few more before suddenly the view screen changed and Admiral Komack was on screen.

“Captain Kirk,” he said.

“Hi,” Jim replied, walking back over to his chair and sitting down. “Nice to see you. How are you, Admiral?”

Komack’s face went red. “Kirk, this is a serious matter. Commander Spock has committed mutiny and has illegally commandeered the Enterprise.”

Jim nodded. So dead, Spock. But I love you and we’ll get through this and then you are so dead.  “Uh-uh, but you see I was not acting as a commanding officer at the time of this alleged mutiny.”


Jim motioned to himself. “I mean, do I look like a captain right now? I’m in civilian clothes. So, Spock did not technically commit mutiny.”

Komack’s face went redder. “He nerve pinched Commander Scott and you, he fought two security guards, and drew a phaser on his crewmen. He then ordered your navigator and helmsmen to start up the ship, input coordinates to Pluto, and initiate the autopilot function.”

“Uh-huh.” Jim stood up and walked over to the helmsman station. He tapped at a few buttons. “Admiral, it appears we are heading towards Pluto and will circle around it before heading back to the space station. We’re at warp one so we should be back in a week.”

“Oh? Back in a week? Why didn’t you say that? That makes this all better then.”

Jim smiled at the admiral. “Sir, look…”

“No, you look Captain Kirk. I have starships trailing you, ready to incapacitate the Enterprise and bring you both back here. Commander Spock…”

“Is sick,” Jim interrupted. “He’s under the influence of a Vulcan ailment.”

“I know. Lieutenant Commander Uhura said that he was suffering from a blood fever. But that should not be an excuse for what he has done.”

“I know, I know. Look, he’s not himself. This fever…it makes him very aggressive and he needs to be with just me for right now. That’s why he did this. He needs me. Just me. Away from everyone who he perceives as a threat. We’re all alone on the ship. It’ll be in good hands and we’ll be back in one week.”

“I’m not…”

“Talk to Ambassador Sarek!” Jim told him. “Please. This is a life or death situation. Spock’s fever will get much worse, especially if you come here and take him. He needs me. He’ll be fine in a week. Just please. Talk to Sarek. He’ll explain it better than I can. Please.”

Komack eyed him for a few moments in silence. He then nodded. “I’ll order the ships to back off while I talk to Ambassador Sarek. I’ll contact you in one hour.”

Jim smiled. “Great, but I may not be able to talk in an hour.” Jim could feel the heat rising more through their bond.


“Well…” the bridge doors slid open and a shirtless Spock walked in. Jim waved at Spock then said to Komack, “Gotta go. Talk to Sarek. Don’t come…” the communication cut off. Jim turned and found that Spock was sitting at Uhura’s station now and had turned off the communication.

Jim walked over and stood before his mate. “Hey, sweetie.”

Spock’s hands were shaking in his lap. He slowly lifted his head. Jim saw Spock’s pupils were blown wide, making his eyes appear black instead of their normal chocolate brown. The Vulcan was breathing hard, his face flushed light green.

“Oh, honey.”

“I am sorry,” Spock forced out. “I…it was…the only way.”

Jim touched Spock’s cheek. “Fuck, you’re hot. Spock, we could’ve mated at home, in our apartment.”

Spock leaned into Jim’s touch. “No. No, you were not there. You were here, on our ship. I need you.”

“I need you, too. We’ll mate and have a fun time.”

“Jim, ashal-veh, it will not be fun. I could injury you. I could ignore any pleas to stop. I…” Jim raised his other hand, cupping his mate’s face. He leaned down and pressed a kiss to Spock’s forehead. Spock trembled at the contact.

“Spock, I’m already yours,” Jim said softly. “I know you’d never hurt me.”


“I love you, adun. I can handle whatever you need of me right now.” Jim pressed a kiss to the corner of Spock’s mouth. “So why don’t we…Spock!”

Spock stood up and pulled Jim into his arms. His lips met Jim’s in a frantic kiss. Jim melted into Spock and kissed back.

Soon they were both naked and had moved to the captain’s chair. Jim straddled Spock’s lap and moaned as he ground his hips into Spock’s, enjoying their hard cocks moving against one another. 

“T’hy’la,” Spock groaned. He grabbed Jim around the back of his neck and pulled him close for another passionate kiss. Jim fought him for dominance but Spock had control. Jim sat up slightly so Spock’s cock was nestled between his cheeks.  He angled his head so Spock could deepen the kiss as he rocked back and forth in Spock’s lap, loving the Vulcan’s double-ridged cock sliding against his entrance hole.

Spock bit at Jim’s bottom lips before moving one hand from Jim’s waist to his erection.  He stroked himself and rubbed the leaking head against Jim’s entrance.

Prepare first, Jim told him, sucking on Spock’s tongue. Spock growled in response but did as Jim asked. 

He made quick work of preparing his mate, using his own natural lubricant to slick Jim’s passage. Jim moaned and broke the kiss. He moved his hips down onto Spock’s fingers. Spock’s fingers stroked against his sweet spot and he nipped at Jim’s jaw before removing his fingers.


“Mate,” Spock growled.

Jim chuckled and sat up slightly, positioning himself over Spock’s cock.  Jim felt the head against his hole and then slowly sunk down.

“Jim,” Spock groaned as Jim threw his head back and impaled himself onto his dick.

Jim adjusted quickly to Spock’s girth then looked at his mate.  Jim gave him a little smile before leaned a little closer, wrapping his arms around Spock’s neck.  He rotated his hips and relished how Spock’s double ridges rubbed him the right way. 

Spock moved his hands to Jim’s back and lovingly caressed Jim’s soft skin as his mate rocked his hips back and forth. 

“Feel good?” Jim asked. Spock nodded. “Need more?” Spock nodded again.

Jim grinned and raised his hips up until the head of the double-ridged cock was almost out of him then slammed down. Jim started moving faster, riding Spock hard; gasping and mewling in pleasure as he did, his cock bouncing against his stomach. His prostate being pleasurable tortured from those double-ridges.

Jim’s sweet noises grew louder as he worked himself more furiously up and down on Spock’s aching hard dick; clenching around Spock and making sure the Vulcan was kept tight in him.

Spock gripped his hips and let out a deep groan, enjoying his mate taking control—for now.

Jim stared down at him, his blue eyes wide as he bounced himself roughly onto Spock’s thick cock. “You like that?”

Spock grunted and nodded.

“All yours, right?” Jim grinned, his pace not faltering.

Spock nodded again as he felt his climax growing closer.

“All mine,” Jim growled, slamming down hard and mewling as his prostrate was nailed.

“Yes,” Spock groaned. Spock raised his hand to Jim’s meld points.

“Go on, Spock, I’m all yours.”

Spock pushed into his mate’s mind. Jim was blasted with nothing but pleasure as their bond lit up and sparks went all throughout Jim’s body.

Jim threw his head and cried out Spock’s name as he released onto Spock’s stomach. Spock finished a second later, filling his mate with his seed.  Jim sighed as he came down from his orgasm before patting Spock on the chest and rising off of Spock’s spent cock. 

Spock sat there and caught his breath as Jim stood before him.

Jim panted too. He smiled at Spock. “Alright for now, Spock?”

Spock’s eyes were still black and now hungry looking. The Vulcan didn’t say anything.

Jim nodded. “Okay. I’m going to check our course and then we can head to the bedroom.”

Spock didn’t say anything, just continued to stare at him. Jim turned away and went over to the helmsmen and navigator console. He could feel Spock’s seed leaking down his thighs.

Jim stood before the console. “Course is good…Spock!” Jim fussed as he bent over the console and pinned to it by Spock.

Spock growled and bit the back of Jim’s neck.

Jim moaned in pleasure and pain. He felt Spock ground his hips against his ass, his husband’s cock once again hard. “How are you hard again? Oh…wait…you weren’t kidding with that whole take me repeatedly thing, were you?”

“Mate, my mate,” Spock said, starting to rut against Jim.

Jim chuckled. “Repeatedly means repeatedly with no down time, doesn’t it?”

Spock growled and nipped at Jim’s neck.

“Fuck,” Jim sighed.

Spock’s rough tongue slid across his skin of his nape down to his upper back.

“Can’t the claiming wait until we get to a bed?”

“No,” Spock snarled into Jim’s neck. All mine, can’t leave, need you.

Jim nodded then moaned as one of Spock’s hands went under him to a tweak a nipple. He canted his hips back, rubbing his ass against Spock causing his mate to groan

Spock kissed the back of his neck before adjusting his hips. A second later Jim felt Spock’s thick cock slid between his cheeks. Jim bit hit bottom lip as Spock sat up. The slick head nudged against Jim’s hole and gently started pressing inside.

Jim relaxed as Spock was nice and slowly entered him. He thanked the stars that Vulcan’s had natural lubricant. Jim moaned as his prostate was brushed by double-ridges as Spock situated himself completely inside him for the second time in a matter of minutes. 

Jim moved and rested his forearms against the console, his hands curling around the edge to hold on. Jim pressed his hips back against Spock and gasped in pleasure as Spock nuzzled Jim’s neck, kissing and marking him.

“How long will this last?” Jim asked, circling his hips and fucking himself back onto Spock’s cock.

Spock’s chest rumbled against his back in response. Spock was still burning up. The fever starting to leak into Jim.

Jim shivered. “That long, huh?” Jim turned his head and managed to get a kiss from Spock before the Vulcan pulled almost out then thrust back in.

“Spock,” Jim cried out.

Spock growled then set a hard and fast pace pumping into his mate. Jim mewled under him; his own cock hung between his legs, not quite ready to play again. When Jim tried reaching for it, though, to try and coax into attention, Spock bit his neck then moved a hand to Jim’s meld points.  Jim screamed as Spock mentally brought him pleasure, his cock immediately hardening and perking up.  Spock’s thrusts speed up as he rolled one of Jim pert nipples between his fingers.

Jim mewled and arched his back, reaching his climax a moment later, his seed spilling onto the seat under him.  Spock rutted hard into him a few more times before groaning and stilling; releasing deep in his mate again.

Jim moaned as Spock stayed in him and kissed his neck and side of his face.

“Can we move to the bedroom now?”


Day 3

Jim slowly woke up in his bed. A large, heavy presence was sprawled across his back and something was buried inside him. Jim sat his head up and looked over his shoulder. “Are you asleep?”

Spock didn’t move but was breathing heavy against Jim’s back.

Jim tucked his arms under him and pushed himself up a bit more. He turned slightly and saw Spock was asleep or passed out behind him. Jim wiggled his hips and groaned. “And you’re still in me. Seriously?”

It took some maneuvering but Jim managed to get Spock off of him and his dick out of him. Jim sat on the edge of the bed and rolled his shoulders feeling sore and stiff everywhere. The first day had been fun. The second day, a little less as Spock mostly focused on his own pleasure. The Vulcan hadn’t done anything but fuck Jim, carry him around to new locations to fuck, and watch Jim like a hawk whenever Jim needed to use the restroom or eat something. Jim did have to make a dash to the bedroom one time when Spock wasn’t looking. He made it a few feet before Spock tackled him to the ground and took him again. Eventually Spock got the picture and carried Jim to the bedroom.

Jim had slept, though. He’d woken up several times with Spock rutting into him but Jim didn’t mind, as long as he got some sleep.

“Okay, lets walk,” Jim said to himself. He held onto the bedside table and forced himself to stand up. Groaning as his legs and muscles protested his movements. Jim eyed the bathroom door then, holding onto the bulkhead, carefully limped towards the room.

He sighed in relief as he made it into the room and leaned against the counter top where he rested for a moment. He took in his appearance in the mirror and grimaced. He touched his face, need a shave. He eyed the marks he had before touching a few, hissing at the contact. He was sore all over. Looking down he found more marks and bruises on his hips and legs. He reached for the dermal regenerator but stopped himself. Spock would probably be upset if the marks were gone. Jim shook his head.

“The things you do so your husband won’t die,” Jim said to his reflection. He closed his eyes and focused on their golden bond running connecting them. It still so beautiful and strong after all these year. An all theirs. Jim opened his eyes and couldn’t help but grimace again at his reflection. He shook his head then forced his legs to carry him to the shower.

After the shower, Jim limped back into the bedroom where the found Spock where he’d left him. He walked over and gently touched Spock’s cheek. He was still burning up.

We’ll get through this, Jim thought. And then no more sex for a month or two.

He limped into the other room and quickly ate a sandwich and drank some water. A second after Jim felt their bond flair up, Spock roared loudly from the other room.

“Break time is over,” Jim said as he heard Spock rushing into the room. Jim turned and waved at his husband. “Hey, sweetie, I’m here.”

Spock stood there, completely naked, staring at him with such intensity and hunger that Jim’s cock start to perk up. Spock had a nice day’s worth of stubble on his face and wore it well. Jim’s eyes trailed over Spock’s body. At least Spock had some marks and bruises of his own from Jim giving it as good as he got. The Vulcan’s hard penis stood proudly between his legs.

“Burn…mine,” Spock growled out, stomping towards his mate. 

“I know.”

“Mine…t’hy’la,” Spock told Jim as he got to him and grabbed him, hoisting him over his shoulder before turning and heading back into the bedroom. “No one else.”

“Spock, no one else is here. I’m all yours.”

Spock dropped Jim on the mattress before pouncing on him, covering his body with his and claiming Jim’s mouth in a heated and dominated kiss.  Jim mewled into Spock’s mouth and arched up against his Vulcan.  Spock sucked on Jim’s tongue then plundered his mouth before trailing kisses and bits along Jim’s neck and down his chest. 

“Yes,” Jim sighed out.  He rubbed his hands over Spock’s back and basked in the pleasure Spock was wringing from him.  He cried out when Spock latched onto a nipple and eagerly suckled at it, making it hard and pert before removing his mouth and laving the other with attention.

Jim gripped Spock’s back and moved his hands to Spock’s shoulders as the Vulcan continued downwards.  Jim threw his head back as Spock got to his groin and took in a deep breath.

My mate…t’hy’la…adun…mine…all mine.

“Yes,” Jim moaned. “Yours and you’re mine.”

Spock kissed around his erection and testicles before sucking on them then licking up Jim’s shaft to the head. 

“Spock,” Jim cried out, pushing on Spock’s shoulders to encourage his mate to keep his head there.

No, Spock growled back but did moved his head down to rub Jim’s quivering hole with his rough tongue. 

Jim keened and pushed his ass closer to Spock’s mouth.  The Vulcan growled again, pushing his tongue further inside Jim. 

Jim panted as Spock attended to him there for several moments before pulling away and hiking Jim’s legs up over his shoulders and pulling Jim down further on the bed.  Jim’s arms went above him on the bed as Spock started rubbing his arousal against his entrance. Jim moaned as the head repeatedly speared against his hole but didn’t enter him quite yet.

“All yours, Spock,” Jim sighed. “Take me.”

Jim clenched around him as Spock slowly pushed all the way in until he was bottomed out.  The Vulcan threw his head back and roared at being completely surrounded in Jim.

Fuck, keep going.  I’m here for you to take as much as you want, Jim encouraged Spock, wiggling his hips and moaning as Spock’s double-ridges rubbed him the right way. 

Spock looked back down, his breathing hard and his body on fire as he pulled out and snapped his hips forward. 

Jim cried out and threw his own head back as Spock started a ruthless pace. Taking him just as Jim told him too. 

Spock fucked him hard, causing Jim and himself to move up the bed with Spock’s thrusting.  Jim continued to moan and make sweet, encouraging noises as Spock brought him immense pleasure.  When Jim’s head met the backboard to the bed, he pinched at Spock’s ears as the Vulcan’s focus was only on burying his aching cock inside Jim over and over.

Spock growled and snapped his gaze to Jim and soon realized his mate was not pleased about where his head was knocking. Spock stopped for a moment and pulled out. Jim smiled at him then gasped as he was flipped over and pulled back onto his hands and knees.

Jim caught his bearings at the change in position. Spock placed a hand on Jim’s back and pushing him back down onto the bed.  Jim let out an exasperated sigh as his face and chest were down against the bed while his posterior was in the air, on display to his Vulcan.

“Spock,” Jim moaned as Spock speared into him again.


Jim closed his eyes and sighed as Spock rolled off of him several hours later.  Jim was sore and leaking and needed some more sleep.  He opened his eyes and looked to Spock who had his eyes closed and was breathing hard. 

Jim turned over and went to get out of bed but Spock growled and grabbed, pulling him over until Jim’s back was against Spock’s chest.

Don’t leave…all mine…can’t leave me…Spock mentally fussed.

“Spock,” Jim croaked out. “I need some water and more food.”

Spock nuzzled the back of Jim’s neck before he released Jim. He gave Jim a pointed look that said ‘do not move’ and then got out of bed and walked away.

Jim did move, sitting up and leaning against the headboard. “I need a shower too!” Jim called to his mate.

Spock growled from the next room and their bond thrummed.

“Okay, okay, no shower right now.” But you will sleep again eventually.

Spock returned a moment later with a tray that he gently placed on the bed beside Jim. Jim smiled seeing Spock had brought him a bottle of water, a banana, and a cup of jello.

“Thank you.”

Spock merely stared at him, still standing beside the bed.

Jim took a few gulps of the water before moving to the banana. He ate it leisurely, amused that Spock was standing there, still hard, and eyeing him like a hawk. When the banana was gone, Jim reached for the jello but Spock knocked it away and tossed the tray to the floor.

“Alright, break time is over again,” Jim said as Spock once more pinned him to the bed. Jim pushed on the Vulcan’s shoulders. “Hey, can my ass have a break for a moment, please?”

Spock growled but did turn them over and push Jim’s head down to his cock.

Such a gentleman, Jim thought before wrapping his lips around the head.


Day 5

Spock woke with a pleasant weight on him. He wrapped his arms around Jim and nuzzled his cheek against the top of Jim’s head before finally opening his eyes. Jim was mostly on top of him, sound asleep. Jim’s left arm and leg were thrown over Spock and his head nestled under Spock’s chin.  Spock maneuvered himself a bit and kissed the top Jim’s head then slowly and carefully removed himself from the bed as to not wake his mate.

He stood next to the bed and sighed. His mate was covered by the sheet from the waist down. Waist up he was bare and…Spock clenched his fists. Bites, bruises, and other marks littered up and down Jim’s bare back, sides, and arms.

I did this, Spock thought. I harmed my mate.

Jim stirred on the bed and slowly opened his eyes.

Spock hung his head. “I cannot apologize enough, ashal-veh. I have harmed you and…”

“No, Spock, no,” Jim said, his voice rough. He heard Jim shuffle around on the bed before Jim took his hands. “Look at me.”

Spock shook his head.


Spock slowly lifted his head. His eyes found Jim’s. Jim smiled at him.

“You need to shave,” Spock said.

Jim’s smile grew bigger. “Same to you.”

“You are injured and…”

“Spock, I’m good. Look at you.”

Spock looked down at his naked body. He saw green marks and bruises on himself.

“I gave as good as I got,” Jim told him. “I’m sure if you look at your back, there are marks where my nails dug in.”

“I still…”

“Spock, you weren’t yourself. You were a sex-crazed, primal Vulcan for a few days. We made it through and hey, you’re not dead!”

“No, I am not.”

Jim slowly stood up with Spock helping him. Jim wrapped his arms around Spock. “I love you.”

“Taluhk nash-veh k'dular,” Spock replied. He touched Jim’s stubble covered cheek. “Thank you for seeing me through my time.”

“No problem, Spock. This is a once every seven years thing, though, right?”

Spock nodded and Jim sighed. “Oh good. I can totally handle that.”

“As can I. I am still sorry for my actions this past week. Commandeering the ship, nerve pinching you and Scotty—I was not in my right mind.”

“I know.”

“When we return I will turn myself in…”

“Spock, that’s not necessary. I managed to get a message out yesterday. Nothing is going to happen to you. Your dad explained everything…well everything but the whole mating repeatedly part, and besides, he’s a diplomat and you’re his son. You can’t be tried. I think our next five-year mission will be delayed a few weeks, though. The ship needs a serious deep cleaning.”

Spock blinked. “Were we not in this room the whole time?”

Jim shook his head. “No. We were on the bridge, observation deck, engineering, medbay—which was a hoot. You know they have beds with stirrups? I just put my legs up and…”

“Jim,” Spock said.

Jim chuckled. “Deep cleaning and sanitizing everywhere.”

“Again, I apologize.”

Jim chuckled. “It’s alright Spock. We should clean up a bit, though, before we get back to base.”


Jim took Spock’s hand. “C’mon, we both need showers and a shave and lots of food.”


Jim turned and slowly led Spock towards the bathroom. Spock wanted to apologize again as Jim was limping but didn’t. Instead he enjoyed seeing his mate’s bare back and now bare butt.

“Jim, you have a bit mark on your posterior.”

“Who the hell do you think did that?” Jim threw over his shoulder as they walked.

Spock smirked to himself. “Me. Because it is mine.”

“Yeah, yours, but it is off limits for like a month.”

“Understandable.” Still mine. All mine. Spock reached his friend hand out and touched the other cheek.

“Spock, behave or else.”

Spock removed his hand. “Yes, adun.” But then he touched it again.


Two days later, the ship was back at the starbase above Earth. The autopilot wasn’t for docking so a few crewmembers had to beam aboard and bring the ship in. When Jim and Spock disembarked, they were met with their friends, Spock’s parents, and Admiral Komack.

Jim smiled and waved. “Hello.”

Spock held his hand up in a Vulcan salute. “Greetings.”

“Any damage to the ship?” Komack asked.

“No, Sir,” Jim and Spock replied.

“But,” Jim said hesitantly. “Um…the inside may need…um…sanitizing.”

“Sanitizing?” Komack repeated. “Why the hell would…nope.” He shook his head. “I don’t want to know. Kirk, you, your crew, and ship are grounded for another month before your next mission starts.”

“Yes, Sir.”

“I expect both of you to report to the headquarters Monday morning.”

“Yes, Sir.”

“And Mr. Spock.”

Spock looked to the admiral.

“Do not do this again.”

“Yes, Sir.”

Komack gave them both a look before turning on his heel and leaving. Scotty and Uhura walked up to them.

“My sincere apologies to both of you,” Spock said.

“Forgiven,” Scotty said before handing Spock a PADD. “Here’s a list of things I need on the Enterprise now.”

“We’ll take care of it,” Jim told him.

“How are you both?” Uhura asked.

“Yes, how are you?” Amanda reiterated, walking up to them with Sarek and Bones.

“Good,” Jim replied. “Sore but good. I’m thinking of having Spock castrated.”

Spock shot his mate a look. No.

Their company chuckled, minus Spock and Sarek.

“Oh, I thought about that when…” Amanda tried but Sarek shushed her.

“Mother, not appropriate,” Spock said before looking to his mate. “And no.”

Jim winked at him as Bones appeared with a tricorder and started running it over Jim. Jim sighed and waved his hand at Bones. “I’m fine, Bones.”

Bones continued to scan and only stopped when Spock growled as Bones hovered the tricorder over Jim’s backside. Bones jumped away.

“Fine, he’s fine! Stop growling, hobgoblin,” Bones fussed.

My mate, Spock grabbed Jim’s hand and pulled him close.

Spock, I’m sure he was just making sure nothing was…hurt, Jim told him. Behave.

“I’m sorry you boys are in trouble,” Amanda said. “But I am glad we get another month with you two before you head out again.”

“Indeed. Perhaps you would like to peruse these pamphlets,” Sarek spoke, handing over a few pamphlets to Jim and Spock. “The first one comes highly recommended from the Sulus.”

Jim and Spock looked down at the paper in their hands. San Francisco Surrogacy Center.

“Oh,” Jim and Spock said.

“Um…sure, we’ll…um…take a look,” Jim told them.

“Affirmative,” Spock said.


One Month Later

“A second five-year mission,” Jim announced as the ship prepared to leave the space dock. “Can’t believe it.”

“Neither can I,” Bones muttered. “Five more years stuck in deep space. This time, for sure, we’re going to die.”

Spock arched his brow and looked at the doctor. “Doctor, you did not have accept this commission.”

Bones gave Spock a look. “Would you actually want me to stay behind? What would you two do without me?”

“Die,” Jim chuckled.

“Exactly,” Bones agreed. “You’d both die and then I’d have to suffer the wrath of Spock’s mama because I wasn’t there to save you two. I’m here because I’m needed here. And also, Carol signed up again to be here.”

“Logical,” Spock said.

“Yeah, logical.” Bones turned and headed off to medbay.

Spock looked down to his mate in the clean and sanitized captain’s chair. “Since we headed to the second star to the right last time, perhaps we head to the second start to the left this time.”

Jim smiled up at him. “I was thinking the same thing, Mr. Spock.”

Chapter Text

Age 42

Spock couldn’t help but smile as he watched Jim take their newborn daughter into his arms. She was less than two minutes old, having entered the world screaming and hadn’t stopped until the nurse wrapped in her a light purple blanket and placed her into his mate’s arms.

Jim’s face lit up as he held her close and peered down at her face. The crying stopped and their daughter blinked up at Jim. A few happy tears streamed down Jim’s cheeks. Spock felt that he was happy crying as well.

He approached and put an arm around his mate’s waist and stood close to Jim’s side, raising his other arm to touch their daughter’s soft hand. She flexed her fingers then wrapped them around Spock’s index finger.

Jim sniffled. “She’s beautiful, Spock.”

“Indeed, she is.”

Their daughter blinked and looked at Spock. Bright blue eyes met his. She yawned and released his hand. Spock gently caressed her head of short black hair before touching an ear. He gently unfurled it, seeing it turn into a cute little point. Jim adjusted his hold on her and Spock unfurled the other ear.

“We gotta name her,” Jim said.

“Do you still like Seren?” Spock asked.

Jim nodded. “I do. She looks like a Seren. Our star.”

Spock couldn’t agree more. “Seren...Amanda. Seren Amanda.”

“Seren Amanda,” Jim repeated. “Perfect.”





“I want to hold her now,” Spock said.

Jim chuckled and carefully handed her over. She made a soft mewl before settling down and staring up at Spock. “Greetings, Seren. I am your sa-mekh.”

“And I’m your daddy. Or dad. Or papa. I’m not picky.” Jim told her.




“Excuse me?”

Jim and Spock looked up. A nurse stood before them with a smile. “I need to take her now.”

Spock narrowed his eyes. “Pardon?”

“For a checkup and then I’ll…”

“No,” Spock growled.


Spock held Seren closer and growled again. The nurse quickly left the room.

“You really have got to stop that,” Jim said, taking Seren back from Spock.

“She is mine.”

“Mine too.”

“Ours,” Spock said.

Jim nodded and looked down to their bundle of joy. Spock wrapped his arm around Jim and Seren. Giving his mate a kiss on the lips before kissing Seren’s forehead.

“Listen, Spock, we really have to do a check-up…” Bones gripped, coming into the room.

Spock growled at Bones and shuffled Jim and Seren away from the doctor. “My daughter. My mate. No check-ups. Mine.”

Jim gave Bones an apologetic look before saying. “Just give me a few moments and then you can check on Seren.”

Bones nodded and left the room.

“My Seren,” Spock said softly.

“Yes, but your Seren needs check-up.”


“Don’t make me call your mama, Spock.”

Spock blinked then nodded. “One check-up and then we take her home.”



Age 45

“Mine,” Spock said as the nurse handed him a bundle wrapped in a light green blanket.

“See, check-up is done and now you can hold him as much as you want,” Bones said. “He’s healthy, just like Seren was.”

Spock nodded then turned and promptly left the room with his new baby.

“You’re welcome!” Bones called to him.

Spock walked the few feet down the hall and entered the room Jim was waiting in with Seren. Seren stared as Spock approached. Jim had her on his hip. Her shoulder length black hair up in pig-tails. 

“Seren, sweetie, this is your new little brother,” Jim said as Spock stood before them.

He adjusted his hold on their new son to show his slumbering face to Seren.

Seren peered down at him. “Baby.”

“Baby brother, Grayson,” Jim told her.

“Baby bwoder, Gwayson,” Seren said.

“Close enough.”

Spock arched a brow but said nothing. “Yes, Grayson George.”

“Gwayson,” Seren repeated. “My baby bwoder.”


“Affirmative,” she repeated with a small smile.

My babies.

Our babies, Spock, Jim corrected.

Yes ours. But all mine.


Three Months Later

“Jim, have you seen my PADD?” Spock asked, looking through his satchel in the kitchen. “I left it on the table last night before we retired to bed.”

Jim appeared next to him, sitting a travel coffee mug on the table. Grayson was propped up with Jim’s other arm, dozing on his daddy’s shoulder. “Yeah, I think Seren was playing with it.”

“Playing with my PADD? She has her own.”

Jim snorted. “It’s just a PADD, Spock. We have several around here.”

“But that one is mine.” Spock turned and walked out of the kitchen and into the living room. Seren was lounging on the couch with Spock’s PADD in her hands. She tapped at the screen, playing a logic game that Spock didn’t recall installing. Spock walked over. “Seren, that is not yours.” He took the PADD from her. “This is mine. My PADD. Not yours.”

“Sa-mekh,” Seren whined. “My game.”

Spock saw her pink kiddie one on the recliner chair nearby. He picked it up and handed it to you. “This is yours.”

“Mine,” she said looking at the pink PADD now in her hands. “My PADD.” She looked up to Spock. She pointed to his PADD. “Mine, too.”

“No, it is mine.”

Seren pouted but nodded.

Vulcans, Spock heard Jim sigh through their bond.  


Two Days Later

Spock internally sighed as he sat on a blanket in the park. Jim had Grayson propped up in his lap, rolling a ball back and forth on the grass with Seren. Grayson made a happy noise when Seren rolled the ball back. Jim moved Grayson’s hands and helped their son push the ball back again. Grayson giggled.

My family...but this is illogical.

“Spock, we’re having a nice day at the park together,” Jim said out loud. “How is that illogical?”

“Picnics are illogical.”

“You are illogical,” Seren said with a blank face.

Spock arched a brow at her. She broke out into a grin and giggled. “Jim, she spends too much time with Leonard.”

“Nah, she doesn’t. She gets that from me. You're illogical, Spockums."

“Of course, she does.” Spock smiled for a moment before schooling his expression. He reached over and picked up his daughter and put her in his lap. He hugged her and kissed the top of her head. 

"Sa-mekh, we play chess at home?"

Spock nodded. "Yes, we will play chess when we return home."

"I will win."

"We shall see." Spock tickled her sides and she giggled more. He loved hearing her giggles--hers, Jim's and Grayson's. 

“Jim? Jim Kirk?”

Spock looked up as did Jim, to see a male around their age approaching. Spock narrowed his eyes. Jim stood up, adjusting Grayson in his arms.

“Ivan, hey, how are you? Wow, its been what? Twenty years?”

Ivan smiled and nodded. “Yeah, it has been. I’m good. Just in town for a meeting. Living in Des Moines now. What about you? You’re a hotshot Starfleet captain now.”

Jim, who is this?

Jim laughed. “Actually, I’m an admiral now but yeah, hotshot sounds about right.” And old boyfriend from Iowa.

Spock stood up slowly. He put Seren down next to him. She looked up at him to Ivan. Ivan looked to Spock then back to Jim then to the kids.

“Oh wow,” Ivan said. “You’re family?”

Spock walked the few feet over to Jim and took Grayson and put him in his baby carrier in the stroller. He then picked up Seren, who was still eyeing Ivan, and put her in the stroller as well. 

“Yep, my family,” Jim replied giving a Spock a look. What are you going?

Spock straightened up and eyed Ivan. “I am Vice Admiral Spock. Jim is my mate and these are our children.”

“Wow, congrats. Beautiful family.”

“Indeed. My beautiful family.” Spock growled at Ivan and then grabbed Jim and hoisted him over his shoulder.

“Dammit, Spock, seriously?” Jim fussed.

Spock quickly started to push the stroller with one hand but keeping Jim over his shoulder with his other. “My family. All mine.”

Jim sighed. “Spock, that was an expensive picnic basket and we hadn’t even eaten yet.”


“Daddy?” Seren spoke.

“Yes, baby girl?” Jim called to her as he couldn’t see her.

“You are not Ivan's,” she said.

Grayson made a growly noise after she said that then giggled. 

Jim sighed again. Vulcans.

“Mine,” Spock said again, removing Jim and their children from the park.  

You're on the couch tonight, Spock. 


The next evening, Spock sat in the living room in the recliner chair and read a book from Jim’s small library in their townhouse.

Grayson was on his playmat next to the chair, cooing at the star toys above him. Spock glanced down at him and smiled. Grayson’s brown eyes met his. The boy grinned a bit toothless grin back at him.

Spock heard footsteps running down the hall. He looked up and Seren came running into the room, freshly showered and in her pajamas. She stopped before him. “Sa-mekh,” she said, reaching to him. He put the book in his lap and leaned forward to pick her up. Instead of allowing Spock to pick her up, Seren instead grabbed the book from his lap.

“Mine!” she said.

Spock raised a brow at her. “Seren, that is not yours.”

“What’s not hers?” Jim asked, coming into the room.

Spock took the book from her causing Seren to pout and give Spock a grumpy look. “The book is not hers.”

“It isn’t yours either,” Jim said, taking said book from Spock.

Spock’s eyes widened. “Jim.”

“Spock.” Jim then grinned and handed it back before kissing Spock. Behave.

I am.

“This is mine!” Seren announced, holding up a PADD this time.

Jim and Spock looked. Jim chuckled as Spock shook his head.

“Seren, that is my PADD. Not yours," Spock told her. 

Seren walked over to her pink kiddie one and picked it up. “Both are mine.”





“Spock, she’s half me and half you,” Jim said. “You can’t out stubborn her.”

I could, Spock thought.

Seren walked over to them, dropping the PADDs to the floor. She grabbed a handful of Jim’s pajama bottoms. “Mine.”

Spock opened his mouth then closed it. He looked up to Jim and raised both brows. Jim.

“My daddy,” Seren said.

“Yes, I am your daddy.” Jim chuckled, bending down and picking her up. He kissed her cheek.

“My mate,” Spock muttered.

“No, my daddy,” Seren retorted.

“C’mon, Seren,” Jim said. “It’s bedtime.”

“Wead me a story?” she asked sweetly.

“Read you a story? Of course. What story do you want tonight? Cinderella?”

Seren shook her head.

“A monster story?”

She shook her head again.

“Well what then, little lady?”

Seren pointed to the book in Spock’s lap. “My book.”

Jim chuckled. He grabbed the book from Spock’s lap. “Yes, I’ll read you your book.” Jim turned and walked out of the room with Seren and the book.

That book is not age appropriate for her, Spock said, feeling how amused Jim was through their bond. And this is not amusing, t’hy’la.

Oh, it is. I can’t wait for your parents to visit in two days. Amanda and I have oh so much to talk about.

No, you do not. Spock shook his head before rising from his chair. He scooped up Grayson in his arms and walked from the room. “You are not illogical like your daddy and sister.”

Grayson made a cooing noise in response.

“No, you are mine and you will not be stubborn.”

Grayson grinned and giggled.

Spock smiled back and kissed his son’s forehead.


Spock walked up the path to his townhouse’s steps. He climbed up only to blinked and take a few steps back down the steps. He looked at the front door. There was a yellow sticky note four feet from the bottom of the door. Spock cocked his head to the side. He turned his head and looked to their neighbor’s door to the left. No sticky note.

He looked to the neighbor on the right’s door. No sticky note. Spock focused back on his own door. He stepped up again and came before it. He took the note off the door and shrugged before letting himself inside. He closed the door behind him and faced the foyer and hallway.

Spock blinked again.

More yellow stickies. One on the table in the foyer. One on a pair of Seren’s shoes under the table. And several more on other items up and down the hallway. Spock walked on and entered the kitchen to the right. He dropped his satchel in a chair in the breakfast nook.

“Jim,” Spock called.

“In the living room!”

Spock walked through the kitchen, removing yellow stickies from the refrigerator, cabinets, replicater, tea pot, and other items as he went. He entered the living room and arched a brow. There were more stickies everywhere in this room.


Jim looked from where he was lounging on the couch with Grayson snoozing on his chest. “Yes, dear?”

There was a yellow sticky on Jim’s pant leg and a yellow one on the back of Grayson.

“Jim. The sticky notes.”

“Oh, those.”

“Yes, those,” Spock said, removing them from Jim and Grayson and the couch and the television and his recliner chair.

“What about them?” Jim asked.

Spock sighed and looked to his mate. “Why are they everywhere?”

“They aren’t everywhere,” Jim countered.

Spock raised his brows again.

Jim smiled. “Just where Seren could reach.”


“Daddy!” Seren called before she ran into the room. She had a sticky note pad in his hands. She looked at Spock then around the room. “Hey! My stuff!” She then proceeded to put the stickies back on the items Spock had taken the previous stickies off of.

Spock watched with raised brows. “Jim, what is occurring here?”

Seren ran past Spock and put stickies back on Jim and Grayson. She turned and looked up at Spock. “Sa-mekh.”


She stuck a yellow sticky to his pant leg. “Mine.” Seren ran off into the kitchen.

Spock poked his head into the kitchen. She was reapplying the stickies in their as well. Spock went back over to where Jim was laying. Grayson had woken up and was doing a small pushup on Jim’s chest, looking around the room. He caught sight of Spock and grinned.

“Oh, is your dada here?” Jim cooed at their son.

Grayson made a happy coo back.


Jim sat up and put Grayson in his lap. “Yes.”

“What is occurring here?”

Jim smirked. “Whatever do you mean, Spock?”

Spock narrowed his eyes. “James.”


“The sticky notes.”

Jim chuckled. “Oh, those.”

Spock internally groaned. “Yes, those. Why is our daughter placing them on…stuff and saying they are hers?”

“Because I told her to.”


Jim smirked again. “I gave her the sticky notes and told her to put one on stuff she considers to be her’s. Its kept her occupied all evening. I think our bedroom was claimed.”

Spock felt his left eye start to twitch. “Jim, why?”

“Wanted to see what would happen and I am thoroughly amused by the results.”

Spock made a grumpy face. “This is not amusing.”

“It is and that grumpy face of yours, adorable. Seren made the exact same face when I told her no pudding for dinner earlier.”

“Pudding is not a nutritional option for a main meal,” Spock said.

“You had marshmallows for breakfast a few years back,” Jim countered.

Spock blinked. “This is not about me.” Spock walked to the doorway leading to the hallway. He looked back to Jim. “She claimed our bedroom? Illogical. She has her own room with a starship bed. We do not have a starship bed.” Spock left the room still muttering to himself.

Jim bounced Grayson in his lap earning a giggle from his baby boy. “Dada and sister are illogical, huh?”

Grayson cooed in response.

“Yeah, we’re the normal ones, aren’t we?”

“Jim!” Spock called from upstairs. “She has claimed my meditation room and locked the door.”

Jim! She is growling at me that the room is hers. She does not know how to properly meditate yet. It cannot be hers. Jim!

Jim sighed and stood up, putting Grayson on his hip. “Yeah, we’re the normal ones.”


Next day, Jim brought over a pot of tea and sat it down on the table in the breakfast nook. He smiled at his in-laws as he sat across from them and poured them a cup of tea.

He picked up his cup and took a sip as Amanda took a sip of hers as well. Grayson made a gurgling noise and Jim chuckled seeing the baby boy, in Sarek’s arms, blow a few bubbles with his lips.

“How long are you going to let them do this?” Amanda asked.

“Until it stops being funny,” Jim replied.

They looked up as Spock entered the kitchen and looked around. He nodded at his family before removing the purple sticky notes that were on Sarek, Jim, Amanda, and Grayson. He balled the notes up in his hand and tossed them into the trash nearby.

Sarek shook his head as his son then replaced the purple stickies with green ones before stalking around the kitchen, taking more purple stickies off the stuff in the kitchen.

Spock took one off the refrigerator, muttering ‘it is illogical to claim a refrigerator’ but ended up placing a green sticky on it anyway. Spock exited the kitchen and went into the living room.

They heard quick footsteps in the hallway and soon Seren ran into the room. She stopped by the table and looked at them. She made a little growly noise at the green stickies on the people. Jim and Amanda couldn’t contain small laughs as Seren took the green stickies off and replaced them with purple ones.

“My daddy,” she said, sticking one to Jim’s leg.

“My Gwammy.” She stuck one to Amanda’s arm.

“My Gwampy.” She stuck one to Sarek.

“Grandfather or Sa'mekh'al,” Sarek corrected her.

Seren blinked and shook her head. “No. Gwampy.” She climbed into the chair next to Sarek and smiled at Grayson who gave her a big, toothless grin back. “My baby bwoder.” She gave him a kiss on the forehead before putting a green sticky to his tummy.

Grayson looked down and it and started to play with it, crinkling it in his little fists and cooing at it.

Seren jumped off the chair and ran around the kitchen, replacing the green stickies with her purple ones. When she got to the fridge, she reached up and tried to grab the green sticky but was too short.

“Daddy, help,” Seren said, looking at her daddy with a pouty face.

Jim shook his head. “No, if you can reach, it’s not yours anymore.”

Her pouty face turned grumpy. “Mine.” She pointed at the fridge.

“If you can’t take the green sticky off then it is dad’s.”

Seren looked up at the green sticky. She went back to the table and pulled a chair over to the fridge.

“Carefully, sweetie,” Amanda said.

“I careful,” she replied, climbing up onto the chair. She grabbed the sticky and took it off, crumbling it up and tossing it onto the ground. She smacked a purple sticky to the fridge before jumping off the chair and pulling it back over to the table.

“Pick up the trash, please,” Jim told her.

“Yes, daddy.” Seren nodded and picked up the crumbled green stickies and threw them away. She then ran out of the room.

“I should’ve thought of this when Spock was younger,” Amanda said.

“No,” Sarek argued.

She looked to her husband. “You and Spock would have had the whole house covered in different colored sticky notes.”

Sarek shook his head.

Spock came back into the room and looked around. His green stickies where all gone and replaced with purple ones. Again.

He let out an illogical, exasperated sigh. He looked pointedly at Jim. “Do something.”

Jim grinned back at him. “As I am clearly claimed by the purple sticky note of Seren and not by a green sticky note of Spock, I can’t help you.”

Spock growled then gently took Grayson from his father and took off the purple sticky note. Grayson giggled.

Seren came back into the room and put a purple sticky on Spock. “Mine.”

Spock looked down at his beautiful daughter. “We need to talk.”

Seren looked up at him then said. “Nope.”

The doorbell rang just then and Spock left with Grayson to answer it. He came back into the room a moment later with Bones, Carol, and their two-year-old, David, in tow. David stood between his parents. 

“What is with all the stick notes?” Carol asked.

Seren walked up to Carol and placed a purple note on her leg and then a purple one on David’s shirt. “Mine.”

“Urple!” David said, touching the sticking not.

Bones looked down at Seren then up to Spock. “Mine?”

Spock sighed and shook his head.

Seren looked up at Bones. “Not mine.” She then took David’s hand and led him from the room much to the amusement of the adults.

“What the hell is going on?” Bones asked.

“Just Spock getting a taste of his own medicine,” Jim replied with a smile. “Right, Spock? What goes around comes around.”

Spock merely shook his head before placing a green sticky on Bones and leaving the room with Grayson. 

Amanda lightly laughed. “Kittens see, kittens do."