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Grocery Shopping

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Dean was making the usual difficult decision between various brands of alcohol when Sam came running down the aisle of the grocery store. He skidded to a stop and hissed, "Dean, we gotta get out of here."

"What, why?"

"That leprechaun, from Nebraska? He's here."

Dean frowned. "What, here here? In the grocery store here?"

"In the next aisle, picking out some cream here," Sam said, nodding his head to the left.

"Seriously?" Stepping away from the six-packs, Dean walked to the end of the aisle and carefully peeked around the display of corn chips.

Standing in front of the refrigerated rows of milk, squinting at the sell-by dates on two cartons, was the leprechaun.

Dean jumped back. "Dude," he said, gaping at Sam. "That's him."

"I know. We've gotta get out of here," he repeated, gesturing towards the far-off sanctuary of the automatic sliding doors.

"Right, right," Dean said, following him with only one last, longing look at the beer. They hurried as fast as they could without drawing attention to themselves, not that it did them much good.

"Sam," Dean whispered. "He's following us."

"I see him," Sam said.

The leprechaun was pushing a cart of groceries, humming to himself as he glanced at the shelves on either side. He didn't stop once. Baked goods must not be his thing.

Which gave Dean an idea. Slipping one of his knives into his hand, he picked up a huge paper bag of sugar. The tip of the knife was all he needed to get a stream of the stuff falling onto the floor.

"Oh, man, Dean," Sam said, trying to sound judging and disappointed. It didn't quite work. "That's gonna be a pain in the ass to clean up."

"Not my fault," Dean protested automatically. "These bags always leak, it's poor construction."

The leprechaun looked down at the small pile of sugar on the floor and tsked. Dean and Sam shared a hopeful glance. Once he was distracted by counting the grains, they could make an escape. Yessir, once he stopped frowning at the sugar and started... pushing his cart around the pile? What?

Maneuvering his cart around the mess, the leprechaun left the aisle, politely informing one of the store's workers of the spill.

Sam stared after the disappearing leprechaun. Dean looked down at his pile of sugar, which was still steadily growing.

"So," Sam started.

"Not a leprechaun."


Dean set his opened bag of sugar down carefully, and brushed a few stray grains off his shirt. "We should probably - "


They made a dash for the sliding doors. The not-leprechaun, one Richard Woolsey, helpfully pointed out the spill to a disgruntled teenage employee of the store, and then went back to his grocery shopping.

He really had missed Earth foods while off world.