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Is Doomfanger a Cat?

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"boss, i don't really know how else to put it to ya. doomfanger ain't a cat." Papyrus whips around to face Sans.

"SANS. DON'T BE STUPID, JUST LOOK AT HER! TRULY THE MOST MAJESTIC CAT, I'VE EVER LAID MY SOCKETS ON! SO FEARSOME!!" He points proudly out into the forest where Doomfanger is pouncing around in the snow, probably eating it too, roaring happily.

"yeah, i'm lookin' at 'er right now, she ain't a cat and she's bigger than asgore fer fuck's sake! do ya even know what a fucking cat is!?" Papyrus leans down to Sans's level, sneering.

"DID YOU JUST CALL HER FAT??? I'LL HAVE YOU KNOW SHE'S JUST BIG-BONED-" Sans huffs a laugh in Papyrus's face, turning away.

"yeah, yeah, 'n that's the exact same excuse i use all the time. 'n don't dodge the question. what's a cat, boss? huh?" Papyrus sputters, turning a light pink.

"H-HOW DARE YOU ACCUSE ME OF NOT KNOWING WHAT A CAT IS!!! DO YOU EVEN KNOW WHAT A CAT IS!?" Sans growls.

"don't throw it back at me! stop dodgin' the question, papyrus!" Papyrus gasps melodramatically, secretly desperate to turn the conversation away from the fact that he does not, in fact, know what a cat actually is.

"DO YOU NOT HAVE ANY RESPECT?! I AM YOUR BOSS-"

"oh my stars. yer still my little brother, i raised ya! why don't you have any respect, eh?!" Papyrus glares, before launching into another tirade.

"Do they always argue like that?" Flowey whispers to Frisk, both now forgotten on the side. Frisk just shrugs.

"Do you think we should stop them?" Frisk seems to perk up with an idea, rapidly signing to Flowey.

"Get Grillby?" Flowey thinks for a moment, before sighing, "Yeah, guess we could use an actual adult intervention here." Frisk nods, smiling brightly. They take one last look at the brothers, before jogging off to Grillby's.


"that ain't even what that word means papyrus!"

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN THAT ISN'T WHAT IT MEANS! UNDYNE TOLD THAT'S WHAT IT MEANS!!"

"yer gonna take advice from undyne? yer greatest nemesis, rival or whateva."

"YES WELL, Well, I Suppose You Have A Point. BUT BACK TO THE MATTER AT HAND, SINCE YOU'VE DRIVEN US SO FAR OFF COURSE. DOOMFANGER. IS. A. CAT." Papyrus changes the subject, determined to not let Sans win any argument. Sans sighs, completely exasperated.

"boss, papyrus, i wasn't the one that- whatever. she ain't a cat."

"SHUT! UP! YOU'RE WRONG!" Papyrus stomps childishly in the snow, chin in the air, hands straight at his sides, gloved fingers curled into fists.

"heh. wow, ya really do act like a baby bones sometimes." Sans slouches back, triumphant smirk plastered on his skull.

"...You both do." Doomfanger yips happily at the newcomer from her spot in the snow, laying upside down on her spine.

"DAD!"
"dad! uhhh..." Both brothers turn red as Frisk giggles, gripping Grillby's hand and leaning closer into his warmth.

"Dad?" Flowey, quite poorly, resists the urge to cackle.

"shut it, weed." Sans hides a little in the fur of his hood. Flowey frowns, about to make a remark, before getting cut off by Papyrus.

"I HAVE NEVER ONCE CALLED ANYONE DAD. EVER. YOU MUST HAVE MISHEARD." Papyrus turns his chin up, crossing his arms. Grillby snorts.

"...Right, anyways, I was... recruited to solve a debate...?" Grillby glances down at Frisk and Flowey.

"YES! DA-GRILLBY, WOULDN'T YOU AGREE THAT DOOMFANGER IS, IN FACT, A CAT?" Papyrus, ignoring the slip-up, leans over, staring Sans down, single eyelight narrowing.

"she ain't a cat-"

"LET! HIM ANSWER!" Sans rolls his eyelight, huffing.

"...I certainly don't remember cats looking quite like that... Perhaps you should have Alphys check her out...?" Papyrus takes a moment to decipher the sarcasm, but oh, it is satisfying. He just about shrieks, blatantly overly outraged, but it was Papyrus after all.

"told ya she wasn't a cat!" Sans manages out between laughs.

"And you were right, son." Grillby smirks, unable to resist antagonizing either one of the skeletons. Sans stops dead in his tracks, flushing red once more.

"shut the hell up, ya ancient bastard." The words come muffled from deep within San's fur hood. Frisk just about collapses giggling, though not without Flowey berating them for almost letting him touch the snow. The commotion catches Doomfanger's attention once more. She decides to finally join the party, sprinting her way over, skipping to a stop just in front of everyone, sending snow flying around her and everyone else.

"...I'd say she's more of a dog anyways." Doomfanger gives the only response, yipping and stomping her skeletal front paws on the snow.

"...Oh? Am I on the shit list now...? Ah, the struggles of being a father..." Grillby sighs, faking dejection.

"STOP!!! NOW!!!"
"shut it!"


"That's exactly what you wanted, huh?" Flowey asks, already knowing the answer. Frisk grins, shrugs and shakes their head.

"That's suspicious. You're suspicious. You can get away that for now."