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Tinder or Grindr?

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Kankuro had a problem. A fifty points problem to be exact. Once again, his stupid Family and Consumer Science class had another stupid project. The teenager was really starting to believe that the cute upperclassman, who suggested taking the class with him, wasn’t worth it. The brunet scowled down at the sheet of paper in his hands before crumpling it up into a ball. Just as he was about to toss it in the nearest trash bin, the previously mentioned cute upperclassman caught up with him in the hall.

“Hi, Kankuro!” she greeted happily.

The teenger’s words caught in his throat. “A-Ah, hey, Rin.”

“I’m, like, so excited to be working on this project! It’s always such a blast to help people out, especially family. Have you decided on who you're going to help yet?” she asked cheerfully.

Kankuro tightened his fist around the paper ball. “Uh, no not exactly. My family is… weird when it comes to help. I’m going to my dad’s for the week of the project and his side of the family is really limited.”

Rin frowned seemingly guilty. “I’m sorry to hear that. Maybe you can talk to your parents about staying with your mom for another week. You’re old enough to make the decision on who you want to stay with after all.”

“Yeah, I guess. I just want to upset either one of them. My parents are both… extremist sometimes…” Kankuro shrugged and sighed, “I’ll figure it out. I have until Sunday morning to make a decision.”

Rin smiled, “There you go. I’m sure you’ll have it figured out by then.”

Kankuro smiled shyly. Maybe the cute girl was worth the lame ass class and project.

By Sunday, the teenager was past thinking about the girl and was completely stressed out. As it turned out, he forgot to talk to his parents and ended up going to his dad’s. It wouldn’t have been a major problem, had his mother not left on a business trip. Now Kankuro was stuck between choosing either his nutty great-grandmother, creepy great-uncle, or grumpy dad. Of course he could choose between the two of his siblings, but let's be honest, he thought they were annoying little shits. Not that he didn't love them! Most of the time.

“This freaking sucks!” the teeanger complained as he flopped onto his bed.The male groaned and shoved a pillow in his face. Maybe if he suffocated himself long enough he’d die and not have to do the stupid project.

“But Daaaaaaad!” he heard his sister screech from upstairs.

He rolled his eyes at the loud banshee and buried his face deeper in the pillow. Sometimes it sucked having the basement bedroom. You could hear just about everything from upstairs - every creak, screech, and door slam.

“Why can’t I gooooo!?” the girl whined again. “It’s not fair! All my other friends are going with their boyfriends! Why can’t I go with mine?”

Kankuro’s ear perked up. His dear little sister was being denied an outing and it had to do with boys. Hopping off his bed, he ran up the stairs and peered into the kitchen. His father was cooking what seemed to be stirfry, while Temari was standing on the other side of the island with her arms crossed defiantly. This ought to be good.

Sasori sighed and gave the girl a strict glare. “I already told you no, Temari. You’re not old enough to be running around at night that late. Nor are you old enough to be dating. Especially older boys.

“Dad!” Temari huffed. “Why do you hate me!? Mom would let me go!”

The redhead turned sharply from his cooking and held up the spatula toward the young girl as if he were pointing at her. “You know damn well that I don’t hate you and that your mother would never allow that.”

Kankuro had to bite his lip to stop his laughter. Here comes the waterworks, he thought to himself.

Tears welled up in Temari’s eyes, “You swore at me! You hate me! You really hate me!”

Sasori huffed and took a deep breath. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to swear, but you need to watch what you say, young lady. I don’t hate you. I love you very much. Your mother and I both do. You know that. Now cease this bratty act of yours and behave yourself.”

The blond groaned and rubbed her eyes, “Please, Dad! Pleaaaase! It’s just the movies. There will only be, like, three guys at most and they’re the same age as Kankuro!”

“Which is too old for you. You’re thirteen for Amaterasu’s sake! Since when are you even into boys? I remember when you used to punch the boys who tried to even give you a hug on the playground,” the redhead stated matter-of-factly.

Temari rolled her eyes, “I was like five then! Just let me be me!”

The redhead shook his head and attended to the food. “No means no, and I won’t tell you again. You’re not going. Ask again and you won’t see that cellphone for the rest of the week.”

“Y-You...You-” the blond girl stomped her foot and screeched one last time. “You’re just jealous that I have a boyfriend and you don’t! That’s why mom left you in the first place!”

Kankuro’s jaw dropped, “Oh, shit.”

Sasori’s expression went from mildly annoyed to bewildered and then to fury in a matter of seconds. His glare was so intense that even Kankuro, who was still hidden, felt scared. What was even more frightening was the tone his father used. He didn’t yell or swear - it was the exact opposite. In a calm, yet stern voice he scolded his daughter. “You have no right to speak me in such a way. I did not raise you to be so disrespectful to me or any other adult. Go to your room right now and do not come out until I call for dinner. We’ll have a talk later.”

Temari winced at her father’s words and quickly dashed out of the kitchen. She was so upset

and frightened that she didn’t even notice Kankuro stretching his neck out to watch her run away.

However, Sasori noticed his son. “What is it, Kankuro?”

The brunet blanched and slowly crept out of his hiding spot. “I heard Temari and was curious to what she was complaining about this time. How’s the dinner?”

Sasori sighed, “That wasn’t a very smooth transition, but the stir fry is almost done. How’s your project coming along?”

Kankuro grumbled under his breath, “It’s coming… along.”

“What is it exactly? You didn’t tell me much. Maybe I can help?”

The teenager shook his head, “That’s the opposite of what I need to do. I need to be the one helping. I have to help a family member with something that is useful and personal to them.”

Sasori frowned and hummed in thought. “Well, you could help me.”

“With what?” Kankuro groaned.

“How about cleaning the whole house - or better yet, be dad for the rest of the week. Yeah, that sounds great,” the redhead chuckled.

Kankuro rolled his eyes, “Dad, that’s not good enough! It has to be personal!”

“It is very personal!” Sasori deadpanned. “It’s a lot of hard work to be a single dad, you know?”

“Well, maybe you should get a girlfriend - er, boyfriend,” the teenager corrected himself, “to help out around the house.”

Sasori snorted at the suggestion. “Right. Dating may seem easier to you because you’re young. I’m a thirty-five year old divorcee with three kids. Plus, I’ve just recently discovered my preference for men. It’s a lot harder for someone like me to find a “boyfriend” these days.”

“You’re just being pessimistic. Divorcees find dates all the time! Even if they have kids!”

The redhead gave his son a flat look. “Yes, but the majority of them are heterosexual.”

That’s when it hit Kankuro. He could help his dad! “Dad! I got it!” he announced excitedly. “I know how to help you!”

Sasori raised an eyebrow, “Yes?”

“Let’s setup a dating profile for you!”

The redhead gave his son a pointed look. “Let’s not.”

Kankuro whipped out his phone and started searching through the app store to find the perfect dating apps. “C’mon, it’ll be alright. People your age do it all the time. Besides, we can find you a guy that is totally into a thirty-five year old with three kids.”

“No, just no. I’ve seen that Catfish show on MTV and I do not intend to be the next loser on it.”

The teen shook his head. “Trust me, dad, that won’t happen. All reality shows are fake anyways. Listen, it’ll just be for the assignment. You don’t have to actually date anyone. Just talk to some people who are interested. Maybe go on one date with them if you think it’s worth it. C’mon, it’s only for a week! After that you can delete the profile.”

Sasori pulled his stir fry away from the stovetop and set it aside. From there, he turned to face his son, arms crossed. His face held a scowl, but it wavered as he thought about the decision. “Fine,” he huffed. He reached into his pocket and handed his phone over to the teenager. “Find whatever you think is the best.”

Kankuro took the phone eagerly and was surprised to find that his father didn’t lock his phone. “You don’t lock your phone?” he asked.

“There’s no real reason to,” the redhead shrugged. “Go tell Temari and Gaara the food is done. I’ll get the table set up.”

The teenager mindlessly wandered through their home, his nose buried in his dad’s phone. As he made his way to his siblings’ rooms, he grinned like mad upon finding the best dating app in the whole universe. Tinder.

Later that night, when the other kids were in bed, Kankuro sat in the living room with his father. He was sitting beside him, helping the older male fill out his profile. His father was having trouble conceiving the idea that he had to share an ounce of his personal life in order to find a match.

“You don’t have to write a novel. You can keep it short and to the point, but you have to make sure it catches attention. Maybe start with a few of your likes, let them get to know what would be a good date. What do you like to do?”

Sasori pursed his lips, “Reading, cooking, working, cleaning, going for walks-”

“Dad, that’s really boring. No one goes to the library for a date. I know you hate eating out, but those are typical date starters. Didn’t you and mom go out to eat when you started dating?” Kankuro asked as gently as he could.

The redhead shrugged, “She always picked the place, to be honest. She asked me out first and suggested some Italian place.”

“But, you hate Italian.”

“She found that out after we got married.”

Kankuro snorted, “Wow, you’re kind of a pushover. Okey, well you like coffee right? Why not put something like Loves coffee, nature walks, and hates Italian food.

Sasori handed his phone over to his son. “You’re clearly better at this.”

The teenager sighed and took the device. “Okey. We need a little bit more though. Let’s see… Maybe Father of three and looking for a long-time partner. ?”

“Sure… but what about my preference? If you don’t put that down then-”

Gay .”

Sasori glared, “Not that blunt. It’s… embarrassing when you put it like that.”

Kankuro raised an eyebrow, “There’s no need to be ashamed, dad.”

“I’ve been straight up until my divorce and I have three kids.”

Kankuro gave a small smile, “Technically, you’ve been in denial up until the divorce, but if you insist, I’ll fix it up. How’s Sorry, ladies, but I’m not interested. ?”

The redhead grumbled and distracted himself by watching the news. “Fine.”

The teen hummed in approval and finalized the profile. He figured it would take about a night or longer before he got any hits on his profile, so he handed the phone back over to father and said good night. Maybe he’d actually get an A on his project after all.

The next morning, Kankuro woke up early on his own. It was a sight to behold, as it rarely happened. The reason for his disrupted sleep was a constant dinging noise. It wasn't a familiar noise, so of course it would wake him up. He sat up in bed and found that the sound was on his table. No wonder it was so loud and annoying. Getting up, Kankuro discovered that it was his father’s phone. “What the hell,” he muttered, picking it up. Every few seconds it would ding with a notification. Unlocking the phone he saw that it was indeed notifications. All of them were from… Facebook? He headed downstairs with the phone in confusion. He found his father sitting at the kitchen table sipping coffee. “Dad, have you seen this?”

When the redhead turned to look at his son, the teenager could clearly see that his father had. The man looked exhausted.

“It wouldn’t stop, so I tossed it in your room.”

Kankuro gave his father a slightly annoyed look. “You could’ve just turned the notifications off. Whatever, what’s this about?”

Sasori looked away and continued to down his coffee.

The teenager raised an eyebrow in confusion. He wasn’t sure if that was a good sign or not. Opening the app up, he tapped the first notification he saw. It lead to his father’s facebook - which was used more for family affairs than anything - and found several comments on his wall. He was still majorly confused until he read the first one.

There’s no way you’re gay! You have three kids? Since when did you and Karura divorce?

He frowned and scrolled down further. More comments were similar to that, a lot of them coming from his mother’s family or friends who hadn’t known for some reason. Then he found some that he assumed were from Tinder. They were all women complaining about how all the cute men were either taken or gay and how it was unfair that such an attractive man was gay.


The redhead sighed, “I told you it was a bad idea.”

“You didn’t say that exactly…”

“Well, I thought it.”

Kankuro huffed, “Look, we can figure this out. Maybe Tinder isn’t for you. Obviously, you’re a chick magnet, so maybe we should find an app that is more suitable to your sexuality?”

Sasori shook his head, “Look, Kankuro, I appreciate what you were trying to do, but maybe it’d just be better if you helped Granny Chiyo instead. I’m sure she can give you a hundred things to help her with.” He stood up and left the kitchen to go wake up the other children.

The teenager frowned. It seemed that it was bothering his father a lot more than he was willing to admit or even acknowledge. This determined the brunet further. No way was he going to help his pruney great grandmother scrape off her bunions. He’d find his father a boyfriend and gets his A if it was the last thing he ever did on this planet!

It was at school that he decided to get some help. Although, he should’ve known better than to ask around about gay dating apps. His friends got a good round of laughter out of it. All day Kankuro had to put up with, “Don’t worry, you’re still our pal. Even if you do like it up the butt.” No wonder his father didn’t want to come out. Kankuro knew his friends were only joking, but the era his father grew up in was a lot harsher. Being gay meant being bullied. Now it was just something most of society accepted.

By the time lunch rolled around, Kankuro still had no lead to help his father. He sat grumpily at the table with his friends. They were all chatting when he was approached by a friend of a friend. He didn’t know the guy that well, but he was an upperclassman and often sat at the end of their table.

“I heard you were asking around for a gay dating app?” the white haired male asked.

Kankuro tensed, “It’s not for me, I swear. You see my-”

The guy shook his head, “I don’t need details. There’s this app called Grindr. Bunch of gay guys use it. Honestly, it’s pretty lousy, but it’s one of the most popular gay dating apps out there. Thought you’d like to know.”

The brunet sat there speechless, his friends giggling like preteen girls. “Uh, thanks,” he finally uttered.

When the guy left and joined them at the end of the table - like always, Kankuro’s friends bursted out in laughter and joked about how he should hook up with the guy. They could be voted the cutest couple for the yearbook, one of his friends joked. The teenager rolled his eyes, but ended up joining them in their laughter and jokes. Grinning down at his phone, he downloaded the app and began to make his father’s profile. At least he could avoid scraping bunions for now.

“You did what!?” Sasori asked in exasperation.

Kankuro smiled sheepishly. He held up his phone and presented it to the male.

Sasori snatched it out of his son’s hands and stared incredulously at the app. “A gay dating app. You set me up on a gay dating app.”

“It seemed like a good idea! Now you can find a guy and not have to worry about judgement.”

The redhead shook his head and handed the phone back to the boy. “I refuse to do this. As your father, I demand that you delete this.”

“No way!” the brunet snapped. “Either you put it on your phone and find a date yourself or I’ll do it!”

Sasori stared at his son in surprise before narrowing his eyes suspiciously. “Why are you so persistent on this? It can’t be just because you want a good grade.”

Kankuro frowned and crossed his arms, “You’re mostly right. I really do want an A, but this little project has shown me something.”

The older male crossed his arms as well. “Oh, yeah? What’s that?”

“You’re lonely. You’re lonely and ashamed. You say you aren’t, but you are. You’ve been denying it for so long, and you’re still having trouble coping with it. You’re more concerned about what others will think, but you shouldn’t. You’re still my dad no matter who you love. You need to accept yourself. It’s been two years, dad. You’re allowed to find someone else - Mom already has. If mom can find a man, so can you!”

Sasori snorted at the last part of his speech. “Son, you were doing really well until that last statement.”

Kankuro huffed, “That’s beside the point. Are you going to download it on your phone or not?”

The redhead heaved a sigh, “I guess I can give it a try.”

The teenage smiled and gave the redhead all of his login info. He was getting closer to that A, he could just feel it!

Chapter Text


It was a quiet Wednesday afternoon in the Akasuna house. Too quiet, Kankuro thought to himself. From his room, he could hear nothing. Not even the thudding of Gaara’s feet trampling across the floor! Worried that his family might have been brutally slaughtered whilst he was in his room, the teenager crept up the stairs cautiously. He peered into the kitchen - no one.

Grabbing the nearby broom from the pantry, Kankuro held the household weapon close and tiptoed through the kitchen and circled around through the dining room. He checked the living room, but didn’t see a soul. However, the door to his father’s office was ajar.

Using the end of the brook stick, Kankuro pushed the open slightly. Seeing a shadow scurry across the wall sent the teenager into a fit of hysterics. Jumping into the room, the boy let out a yell and brought his weapon down upon whatever was in his way. Which just so happened to be a coat rack.

“Oh, hey, son,” the redhead muttered from his seat at his desk. “Quite the entrance.”

Kankuro wrestled himself free of the rack and pushed everything aside. “I thought you guys got murdered! Where is everyone? It’s so quiet.” He stared at his father awaiting an answer. Just what was that man doing on his phone?

The older male didn’t even bother to look up at his son. “Gaara is at Granny’s and Temari is at the movies.”

The teenagers eyes widened, “What? Shouldn’t you be concerned that Temari is with a bunch of boys or that Gaara may be getting filled with cookies and won’t eat dinner later??”

“Meh,” the redhead shrugged.


Sasori continued to tap away at his phone.

Kankuro frowned and raised an eyebrow, “I’m gonna dye my hair.”

“Don’t make a mess.”

“And get a tattoo.”

“As long as it’s your money.”

Kankuro pursed his lips, “I’m gonna get smashed and do a bunch of drugs with my friends.”

“You have friends?”

The teenager huffed and crossed his arms, “I’m going to borrow your car and credit card.”

“All yours, bud.”

Kankuro smirked-

“I’ll make sure they have a cell ready for you.”

The boy scowled, unamused. He approached his father and stood over the male. When the man didn’t look up at him, Kankuro calmly reached down and plucked the phone away.

“Hey!” Sasori snapped, finally out of his trance.

The teenager rolled his eyes and handed the device back. “Welcome back to planet Earth. You’re acting just like Temari. What are you even doing?”

The redhead pursed his lips, “I’m doing what you wanted me to do.”

Kankuro gave a confused look before gasping, “No way! You actually found someone? Who is he? Who is he? What’s his name? What’s he look like? How old is he? Does he-”

“Now you’re the one who sounds like Temari,” Sasori snorted. “His name is Deidara and he’s twenty-seven. Although, he’s got quite the baby-face.”

The tenager grinned, “That’s awesome! When are you going to meet him?”

Sasori rubbed the back of his neck and was distracted by another message that popped up on the screen. His thumbs raced across the slick surface. “We just started talking last night, Kankuro.”

“So what? You two totally need to go on a date! It’d improve my project and make it last longer when I present it,” the boy grinned happily.

The redhead rolled his eyes, “While I’m glad that you’re getting your project done, I wish it was a bit less personal.”

“Tell me about it. Will you do it?”

“I’ll ask,” the man sighed. “Anyways, go tell Temari and Gaara to get ready. I don’t feel like cooking tonight.”

Kankuro gave his dad a blank stare. “Uh, dad… they’re not here. Remember?”

Sasori scrunched his eyebrows together in confusion. “Wait, what?”

The teenager laughed and shook his head, “You really weren’t pay attention. I’m gonna take a shower. Make sure you ask him out.”

The redhead frowned then nearly smacked himself on the head. “Damn it.” He groaned in displeasure at his lack of parenting skills, “Yeah, you go do that. We’ll have to pick them up. I swear if Chiyo filled that boy with cookies, I’ll-”

Kankuro laughed and closed the door behind him as he left his father to gather his rationality. Getting his dad a boyfriend was more than just beneficial to his father it seemed.

“Kankuro, you’re in charge until I get back. No house parties or sneaking out. Keep the kiddos entertained - play a board game or something,” Sasori said as he spritzed on some of his cologne. He looked through the mirror at his older son, who was on his phone and not really listening.

“Yeah, yeah, I know.”

Sasori sighed and ushered the boy out of his room. “I shouldn’t be out any later than ten.” Grabbing his jacket, he and his son entered the living room where his other two children were watching TV.

Temari looked up and frowned in disappointment, “Please, don’t tell me you're wearing that ugly sweater, Dad.”

The redhead huffed and zipped up his jacket, “It’s not ugly! Besides, it’s my favorite sweater. Just listen to your older brother and don’t make any messes.” With that said, he exited the house quickly.

The preteen shook her head, “He’s so not getting another date.”

Checking his watch, Sasori stood outside the designated restaurant nervously. He hadn’t been on a date in two years and now here he was about to meet up with a guy who he barely knows. It was already two minutes past the initial set time for the date and Sasori couldn’t help but tap his foot impatiently.

Five minutes later after uncomfortable waiting, Sasori was tapped on the shoulder from behind. He whipped around on his heels and came face to face with the most divine creature he had ever seen. The male was even better looking in person. He opened his mouth to speak, but the words got stuck in his throat.

“Sasori, un?” the blond smiled.

Quickly clearing his throat, Sasori returned the greeting. “Yeah. Deidara, right?” His face felt flushed and he was sure that it could be seen from outer space. Suddenly, he started feeling self-conscious. The other man was very attractive and not to mention very young looking. His worry was interrupted when the blond smiled at him.

“Sorry, I ran a little late. Traffic, un.”

The redhead shook his head. “It’s alright. Let’s head in?” He held out his arm just the slightest, but Deidara was able to take the hint and eagerly latched onto him. The flustered couple entered the restaurant and hit it off from there.

Unlike how he imagined the date going - that be awkward - it was going just the opposite. He was having a great time getting to know the male, but something was off. He couldn’t place it though. The redhead must’ve had a perplexed look on his face, because the blond returned the look.

“Something on your mind?”

The redhead lifted a brow and pursed his lips, “It’s nothing. I was just wondering what you did for work?”

Deidara bit his lip and was quiet for a moment. Then he spoke up with a small smile, “I’m, uh, working in pyrotechnics.”

“Oh? Where at?”

“Konoha University.” The blond cleared his throat and blushed lightly, “I mean, I teach at the university.”

“Ah, I see,” the redhead muttered. He raised his glass to his lips in order to hide the small smirk on his face. Now he understood what was wrong with this situation. As the conversation went quiet, their eyes met. Sasori could see how nervous the other felt. “After dinner,” the redhead finally spoke up, “would you like to do something else?”

Deidara looked up in surprise, “Like what?”

“Something fun.” He meant it in the most innocent way, but the blond looked like he just smashed his face in a bucket of red paint. He began stuttering and trying to form coherent sentences, but Sasori was able to clarify. “I meant as in going somewhere else - not my bedroom,” he laughed.

The blond gave a shy smile, “Oh, hah, yeah. Where would we go? There isn’t a lot fun places in this town. Ah, sorry, that came off a bit rude, didn’t it?”

Sasori shook his head, excusing the blond’s poor manners. “I know of a place, if you don’t mind me choosing.”

After dinner, the blond took him up on his offer and two left together. As Sasori drove, he noticed the blond anxiously looking out the window then his phone. It was like he thought that Sasori was taking him to be slaughtered or something. It was only when they reached the building with glaring neon lights that he saw the look in the blond’s eyes change.

“Whoa! A bowling alley? That’s like so retro! I didn’t know we even had one, un!”

Sasori chuckled as he watched the blond practically bounce out of his car. Catching up with the excited blond, the two entered the building. Once inside, the redhead felt a sense of nostalgia - the place hadn’t changed a bit since his early college days. Aside from the fix ups, of course. Upon reaching the register, the two were greeted by a ginger with many piercings.

“Sasori Akasuna,” the male grinned. “It’s been a while! How’ve you been?”

The redhead gave a small smile and greeted the older man back. “I’ve been alright. How’re you and the rest of the family?”

“Couldn’t be better. So, whose birthday is it?”

Sasori raised an eyebrow in question.

The man laughed and made a gesture with his hands that emphasized the building. “Why else would you grace us with your presence?”

The redhead flushed and put a hand on Deidara’s mid back. “I’m here on a date.”

The ginger seemed shocked. He turned his wide eyes to the blond.

Deidara gave a shy wave and smile.

“So, just you two then…?”

Sasori nodded.

The older male, still in shock, rang them up for a session and reached out with a stamp. The ink glowed beneath the uv lighting and signified that they were eligible to play.

“Do you mind going ahead?” Sasori asked his date.

The blond blinked, but shrugged, “Not at all. Which lane?”

“Sixty-nine. It’s upstairs.” Deidara snorted and Sasori swore he heard him mutter “my favorite position” under his breath. Moving out of the way for the next group, Sasori stood beside the counter already ready for the questions that were about to erupt from his long-time friend.

“A date, huh? About time - it’s been a year hasn’t it?”

Sasori chuckled, “Two, actually.”

The ginger shook his head, “Too long. While I am happy for you… I gotta ask…”


“He’s not one of Kankuro’s friends, right?”

The redhead glanced over at the blond picking out a pair of shoes. “No. He’s twenty-seven.”

“And I don’t have a bunch of piercings on my face."

Sasori stared at the man unamused.

The ginger sighed, “You know I’m not one to judge, Sasori. I’m just looking out for you. Where did you even meet this kid?”

“It’s a long story. Don’t worry, Pein, I know what I’m doing. I’ll tell you the details later.”

The older male shrugged, “Alright, but don’t think I’m not telling Konan about this!”

Sasori rolled his eyes and grumbled swears under his breath. After he got his shoes, he climbed the stairs and spotted Deidara at their lane. He was bent over the machine, inputting their names for the game. “Hey, sorry about that,” the redhead apologized as he approached the blond.

Deidara smiled and shook his head, “It’s no big deal. He a friend?”

“Something like that,” the redhead mused.

“How’d you know about this place, un?”

Sasori took off his jacket and set it on the seats behind them. “My old college buddies and I used to come here back in the day. Like you said, there isn’t a lot to do in this town, but my friend - whom you just met - got a job here. He told us about the place and we used it as our hangout spot.” Following the blond to the ball rack, he watched as the male bent over - examining each ball. Those certainly were a tight pair of pants Deidara was wearing - curved his figure nicely, especially his ass. The redhead mentally scolded himself and adverted his eyes. It wasn’t until he heard an “Oh, shit!” that he returned his attention to the blond just in time to see him drop the ball at his feet.

While the blond bounced back, Sasori was quick to stop the ball from rolling away. He used his foot to catch it and swept it up in an easy manner. He read the number on top of the ball and raised a brow at the pouting blond. “Are you alright?”

Deidara grumbled, “Yeah, just didn’t think it’d be that heavy.”

Sasori chuckled and put the ball back. “You need to be more careful. Pay attention to the numbers on top of the ball. The weight is put there, so that you don’t grab a ball that’s too heavy for you to handle and-” the redhead stopped, realizing what he was doing. “I’m sorry,” he apologized, red in the face. “I’m so used to scolding my kids that I just started on you. I’m not really making a good impression, am I?”

The blond laughed and shook his head, “You’re fine, un. It was… cute.”

“I’m not so sure about cute, but it’s definitely embarrassing…”

Deidara shook his head once more. “It really isn’t. Why don’t you help me pick out the right one for me? I haven’t been bowling since… Was it my seventh birthday?”

The redhead chuckled and started sifting through the balls. “It’s been a while then? Here, try this one,” he said holding a ball with the number ten on it.

“Isn’t this the size for kids?”

“Not exactly,” Sasori laughed. “It’s a lighter ball for adults. Slide your fingers in and I’ll keep a hold of it until you have it grasped.”

The blond nodded and slid his slim fingers into the holes. A perfect fit. Sliding his empty hand underneath the ball, he was able to take it from Sasori and hold it up without any problems. He still complained however, “Yanno, I don’t remember bowling balls being this heavy.”

Sasori chuckled and picked up a thirteen. “You act like you’ve never picked up a thing in your life.”

“I’m an artist, un,” Deidara stated simply.

The redhead nearly rolled his eyes. He knew well enough that art supplies themselves could be quite heavy - especially the sculpting mediums. “Fair enough,” he said anyways. “You’re up first.”

Deidara smirked and got in front of the lane. “I totally got this!”

“I totally don’t got this,” Deidara complained half way through the game later. He wore a pout and was grumpily sitting while watching Sasori finish his turn. He mouth fell open at the redhead’s perfect strike. That was the third one in a row! “How do you keep doing that!?”

Sasori shrugged with a small chuckle, “Good luck, I guess. It’s really not all that hard…”

Deidara hopped up from his seat and pointed to the score board. “For you maybe. Have you seen my score, un?”

The redhead bit his lip, trying to hold back his amused smile. “Perhaps, I can help you?”

The blond sighed in defeat, “Please?” He grabbed his ball and walked up to the center of the lane, Sasori following him. He jolted in surprise and flushed when the redhead came up behind him.

Sasori placed his hand on the male’s back and grasped the ball from underneath, briefly touching the blond’s fingertips. “Relax,” the redhead said soothingly, “it’ll make it easier to roll it down the lane.” He waited until the male’s muscles were no longer tense and smiled, “Good. Now, do you want me to go through it with you all the way or are you okey with me letting go?”

“Surprise me, un.”

“Alright,” the redhead muttered. Directing the blond, he was able to help him properly line up with the pins and swing the ball at a good momentum. After a couple good practice swings, Sasori eased off him, but continued to guide the blond. “This time for real. On the count of three, we’ll toss the ball. Ready?”

“Yep!” the blond grinned, now perfectly relaxed and comfortable.

Sasori smiled and counted down, their arms going back. Before he could say three, he let go of the ball and allowed the blond to take control. When he did say the number, Deidara threw the ball down the lane and was in utter shock when it didn’t go straight into the gutter. His surprise grew even more when it hit a perfect strike. The next thing Sasori knew was that he was being tightly squeezed.

“Oh my gosh! We did it! I did it! I really did it, un!” the blond cheered happily.

The redhead chuckled and returned the hug. “Yes, you did.”

Realizing how close he was, Deidara pulled out of the embrace quickly with a deep blush. “Sorry,” he smiled embarrassed, “I got excited…”

“It’s alright. I don’t mind,” the redhead admitted. The blond only seemed to blush further at this, so Sasori continued their game. In the end, Sasori had murdered the other with his odd, yet superior bowling skills, but the one strike the blond did get was more than enough of an accomplishment. Before the redhead ended their date, the two went to rest at the food court downstairs and had a shake.

Deidara sipped at his shake happily, oblivious to the redhead’s staring until he heard the slightest chuckle come from the man. “Something funny?” he asked, the straw still between his lips.

Sasori smirked, “You’re quite the bright light under uv.”

The blond blinked before looking down at himself and laughing, “You’re one to talk.”

“It’s the sweater, isn’t it?” the redhead chuckled. “Maybe Temari was right about it,” he thought aloud more to himself.

“Right about what?”

Sasori gave a small fond smile, “My daughter. She hates this sweater - says it’s the most hideous thing she’s ever seen.”

Deidara gasped, “Nuh-uh! It’s not ugly at all!”

“That’s what I told her!”

The blond laughed, “Well, I like it, un. I think you look great in it.”

Sasori chuckled, “At least someone likes it. I’ll have to rub it in her face later.” His smile slowly fell into a nervous purse of his lips. He really was having a great time with Deidara, but it was time for him to ask the questions he had on his mind. After all, he didn’t want to end up with a broken heart or worse - sitting in jail. “I have to ask,” he started.

Deidara tilted his head to the side slightly, “Un?”

“Why me? You could’ve messaged someone closer to your age and without all of the baggage.”

The blond tsked him and gave him a small smile. “You shouldn't call your kiddos baggage. I’m sure they wouldn’t appreciate that. But, to answer your question, I honestly thought you were attractive and sounded interesting. Turns out, I was right.”

The redhead still didn’t smile. “Maybe I should’ve asked the other question first.”


“How old are you?”

Deidara made a confused face and snorted, “I told you-”

Sasori shook his head, “No, I want you real age, Deidara.”

“Hah, wh-what do you mean?”

The redhead gave a tense smirk, “I’m thirty-five and have kids. I know a kid when I see one.”

The blond scowled, “If I’m a “kid” then why did you ask me out, huh?”

“I did that, because I had enough faith to trust you.”

The blond’s scowl turned into a guilty frown.

“Just tell me your real age, so I don’t have to stress about asking out a minor.”

Deidara snorted at the statement, but one look at the redhead’s face made him serious again. “Sorry. I’m legal, un.”

Sasori pursed his lips, “Age.”

The blond sighed and grumbled shakily under his breath, “N-Nineteen.”

The redhead, while he was somewhat at ease stared in shock and contemplation. When the initial shock was over, he spoke to the boy once more. “Which brings me back to my first question. Why?”

Deidara bit his bottom lip, “Please, don’t get mad. You have to promise to not get mad and listen to everything I have to say. Please.”

Sasori nodded.


The redhead rolled his eyes, “I promise.”

The blond smiled sadly and distracted himself with the bottom of his glass. “Well, it started out as a game. My friend and I made a bet on how many guys we could get to send us dick pics, un. We could wait for them to message us or we could message them first. I didn’t want to lose to him, so I sent out a few messages to the first guys I saw. You were on the list, so I figured you were just another horny, desperate gay guy, un.” He glanced up quickly and then looked back down avoiding the redhead’s piercing glare.

“B-But when you actually messaged back and we started talking, I honestly did think you were interesting. The bet wasn’t supposed to go anything further from the pictures, so when you asked me out I got kinda scared and my friend to tag along. And he did! Up until the middle of dinner! He sent me a text and up and left!” the blond grumbled. “I’m glad I said yes though. I had a lot of fun. I wish I was older now. I don’t care if you have kids, un. I don’t see why it’d be a problem at all. It just makes you a hot dilf, but I’m sure you wouldn’t want to date someone who’s only a bit older than your kids.”

Sasori sat in silence, taking in all of the new information. “Is there anything else?” he asked.

Deidara thought for a moment, “I’m actually a student at Konoha university, but everything else I’ve been honest about.”

The redhead nodded, “Alright. Since your friend left you, I’m guessing you’ll need a ride home? Not that I wasn't going to offer anyways.”

The blonde frowned and gave a silent nod.

The car drive was a quiet one, as neither one had nothing more to say to each other. It was only when they reached the blond’s apartment complex, that Sasori spoke up. Right as the blond had opened the door, he gently grabbed his arm - stopping him. “Wait. I need to discuss one more thing.”

Deidara blinked and closed the door. “Un?”

“Thank you,” Sasori smiled. “Firstly, you should definitely be more careful with the people you talk to online. You are very attractive and had I been some creepy pervert, your life would’ve been over. Your friend is a complete idiot for leaving you, and you’re an idiot for saying yes to me.”

“You’re the one who asked,” the blond huffed. “What’s that make you?”

“An idiot for actually believing that your babyface was actually twenty-seven.”

Deidara humphed, “Ouch.”

Sasori rolled his eyes and continued, “Secondly, I honestly wouldn’t mind another date with you - despite the major age gap.” He nearly laughed at the shocked blond. “Tonight was the most fun I’ve had in years. Granted I’ve enjoyed my time with my kids, this was different. You were good company and… undeniably adorable. I didn’t think I’d actually want to go on a second date, especially after finding out your real age, but… I’ve taken a liking to you more than I should’ve.”

The blond couldn’t contain his smile or blush. “I, ah, wasn’t expecting this. I really thought you’d want nothing to do with me. I’d love to go on a second date, un!”

“Figures,” the redhead chuckled. “You have to promise me something first.”


Sasori shook his head, “You really are a kid. Geez, okey. If you want a second date, you have to promise me that you’ll end your little bet and delete your account.”

Deidara nodded eagerly, “I can do that, but hey, you have to delete yours too!”

“Sure. I was going to delete it later this week anyways. My son only made me do this for his school project. Another thing, we can’t tell anyone about this yet. We don’t need to stir up any drama if we aren’t serious about each other, understand?”

The blond nodded again.

Sasori smiled softly, “Good. Lastly, even if we don’t work out, please don’t do anything this stupid ever again. I’d hate to see your missing report on the news.”

“Promise, un,” the boy smiled.

“Alright. You should probably go now, so your friend knows that you made it home alive,” the redhead joked.

Deidara laughed and opened the car door again. However, he didn’t exit right away. Leaning over the console, the boy pressed a sweet kiss on the man’s cheek. “Thanks for tonight. Can’t wait for our next date~”

Well, at least the boy had some manners after all. Sasori wished the boy a good night and waited until he was safely inside the apartment complex to leave. When he finally got home, he found Kankuro still up on the couch. The other two were asleep on the floor under sheet tents. Sasori smiled at the sight and quietly stripped out his outer wear.

“How was the date?” his son asked with a wide grin.

The redhead gave a content sigh, “Interesting to say the least.”

The teenager pouted, “That’s not very detailed.”

“Let’s just say that you’re going to have to babysit again sometime soon.”