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“Damian, I really don’t think this is a good idea.”

Damian turns to arch an eyebrow at Jon, hand raised to knock on the main door to the Wayne Manor. “Honestly, Jon, you need to calm down. You’re acting like my brothers will dismember you the moment we tell them.”

“But they probably will!” Jon protests, panicking. He reaches out to snag Damian’s sleeve, tugging at it. “It’s be bad enough if Mr Wayne wasn’t Batman, Dami, but I’ll be damned if I’m going to fight goddamn Nightwing—"

"Please calm down, Jon—"

“Master Damian?”

Jon squeaks (something that he’d deny to his dying breath later) and starts so hard he almost falls down the stone steps, stopped only by Damian’s firm grip on his arm. He hauls the younger boy back onto his feet. “Uh, hey, Alfred,” Jon laughs nervously and waves at the man standing by the open door. “H-how’s it going?”

“Pennyworth.” Damian greets the butler as he drags the kryptonian in by his shirt, making his way purposefully down the long hallway.

“Always a pleasure to see you, Master Jonathan,” Jon hears Alfred say from behind him as he attempts to dig his heels into the polished marble flooring. He hisses the older boy's name. “Master Damian, the rest of the family is in the sitting room, as per your request.”

Damian nods sharply and Jon, fed up with his manhandling, gets a hold of the older boy’s hoodie and pulls him to a stop. He crowds into Damian’s personal space.

“You called ahead?” Jon hisses, feeling a little light-headed now at the new information. “You mean every member of your family is in that room?”

Damian looks confused. “Just my father and all my siblings. Is this an issue?”

Yes!” Jon almost yelps. “Damian, your family is probably the size of my entire class! And all of them know how to kill me in like, twenty different ways!”

“Maybe thirty.”

“Even worse!” Jon runs a shaky hand through his hair. “Oh god, what if they don’t like me—“

“Jon, you’re panicking.” Damian soothes a hand over Jon’s arm in a calming motion. “Calm down.”

Jon shakes his head, hyperventilating.

“Beloved,” he hears Damian say, “your eyes are glowing.” Shit, he thought he'd stopped doing that. “Breathe.”

Jon takes a deep, shuddering breath and lets it out between his teeth. It’s only then that he notices the tinge of red in his vision and quickly switches it off, blinking hard. “Shit, Dami, I’m so sorry—“

“Jon,” Damian would look indifferent to anyone else, but Jon has known him for long enough to notice the pinch in his expression that means he’s concerned. “You’ve known my family for five years, and there is really no reason to worry, but if this really is too much for you we an always do this another time—“

“Jon?”

Both boys freeze and Jon mentally slaps himself, cursing inwardly because how could he not notice they were standing right outside the goddamn doorway

Dick looks between the two, confused. “Why are the two of you arguing right outside?”

“Yeah, baby brat,” Jon hears the second Robin call from inside and his heart kicks into overdrive again— “you should have come in before you started throwing things, it’s been a while since anything happened around here.”

“Shut up, Jason.” That was Tim.

“Jason, please behave,” Batman says tiredly inside the room.

Damian shoots him a concerned glance before tugging him inside, and Jon gulps. This was a horrible idea, Jon thinks, but follows without resistance.

When they enter the room, Jon’s immediately struck by the domesticity of the Wayne household despite what they did for a living, surprised that it was a rare day where none of the siblings were fighting. Bruce is having a quiet conversation with Cass and Steph hanging off the back of his armchair, Duke scrolling on his phone and earbuds half in his ears. Jason’s lounging on the plush sofa beside Tim, who’s got his reading glasses perched on top of his head and fingers tapping away at a Wayne Enterprises tablet. He looks up when the two enter and smiles at Jon, who finds himself grinning back despite himself.

"Father." Damian nods towards the man and Jon waves. "Hey, Mr Wayne."

He shoots Jon a disapproving look. "I've told you Jon, it's Bruce. Mr Wayne makes me sound old."

"You are old," Jason comments and Steph makes an agreeing sound. Mr Wayne sighs with a tiredness that can only come from being a single father of eight.

”Father.” Damian interrupts as Dick takes a seat. “I asked you all here for a reason.”

“Damian?” Mr Wayne—Bruce—sounds wary. “What’s this about?”

Damian shares a look with Jon, who squares himself and nods. The tense line of Damian’s shoulders relaxes.

“It’s,” Damian starts, squeezing Jon’s wrist in a gesture of comfort. “We have something to tell you.”

“Wait,” and that’s the new kid—Duke, Jon remembers—and he looks confused, hand half-raised as if posing a question. “Is this the both of you finally coming out?”

Damian blinks, and Jon thinks this is the first time he’s seen him actually speechless.

Dick leaps out of the armchair, eyes bulging. “You two what?!”

“I knew it!” Stephanie hoots. Cass blinks. “Dating?” She says, questioning.

Duke turns to face the first Robin, looking confounded. “You didn’t know?” Distantly, he can hear Tim’s noise of utter confusion.

Dick waves his hands wildly. “You’re dating? The both of you are dating?!”

“Wait, wait wait—“ Jason is out of his seat, gesturing between Damian and Jon. “You’re dating? As in dating, actual feelings and shit, dating?”

Damian looks absolutely confused. “Yes?”

“What the fuck—”

“Who on earth let you get a boyfriend?!” Dick yells, and he looks suspiciously like he’s about to start crying. “You’re barely ten for god’s sake!”

Stephanie snorts loudly and Damian's mouth hangs open.

“I am eighteen, you idiot—“

“Exactly!” Jason says, sounding panicked. “There has to be some sort of law against children going out with other children!” Stephanie starts laughing wildly and Damian makes a noise of outrage that Jason completely ignores, instead turning to the adult in the room and swings his hand in a wide circle. “Bruce, tell them!” Bruce looks like he’s still having trouble computing all this information.

“Yeah, Dames,” Steph plays along and Damian fixes her with a deadly glare. “You’re only three months old, how about you play with a few other babies first—“ Cass snickers and even Jon can't repress a giggle. Damian shoots him a look of betrayal.

“I am a teenager!” Damian yells, and Tim’s still blinking owlishly at the couple. Dick gives a loud wail. Jason throws up his hands in frustration. “Not the point!” He snaps testily. “You’re meant to stay the demon brat forever! Next thing we know, you’ll be getting married and moving to another apartment in Gotham and be having kids—“

“That’s not biologically possible, Todd,” Damian snaps.

Jon cuts in weakly. “We’ve actually always had plans to move to Kansas and set up a farm—“ Dick had actually started crying. Jason lets out a high-pitched shriek.

"I thought you were already dating!" Duke cried.

"We accept you no matter what —" Bruce says tiredly, like he's had this conversation before.

“Forget about that,” Tim splutters for the first time since the conversation started. “You’re dating Superman’s son!”

“So are you!”

Jason whirls to face Tim and the younger grimaces. “You’re doing what?!”

“I’m really confused right now,” Duke admits and Bruce makes a pained sound. Steph had pulled popcorn out of nowhere and was happily chewing as she observed the scene. Alfred was now standing at the doorway, eyeing the destruction going on. "Oh dear."

“I was planning on telling you, I swear!” Tim yelps when Jason starts physically shaking him and Jon looks on in concern.

“When?!”

Damian shouts in fury and Jon twists to face back to him, eyes flaring on instinct, before he is promptly stopped by the sight of a sobbing Dick Grayson almost lying on top of a flailing Damian Wayne. “Grayson, cease this at once!”

Bruce rubs his fingers on his forehead tiredly. "Dick, please let your brother go."

“You’re growing up!” Dick wails. “You aren’t a baby anymore!”

“I was never a baby, Grayson, let me go—“

Jason turns to point a finger at Jon, who had slowing started inching towards the door, other hand still clenched in Tim’s sweatshirt. “You.” He says lowly, and Jon freezes. “Don’t. Move.”

“Jon, I concede.” Damian hisses as he tries to twist out of his brother’s iron grip. “This was a horrible idea, I suggest you run—“

Jon squeaks and takes another step back before he’s stopped by a hand on his shoulder. “Do not move, Superboy,” Jon freezes. “We have some things to… explain to you.” Cass says slowly and Jon's starting to feel suspiciously faint. Damian eyes him in concern.

Bruce sighs and drops his head into his hands just as a vase sails over the back of his armchair.