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Incontrovertible Evidence "

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Author's notes: Friday Night Fic Challenge 1/31/03 for the_Alpha_Gate. and thanks to the Nashville Cats for the plot bunnies.


Incontrovertible Evidence

Incontrovertible Evidence

by Debi C

Date Archived: 02/03/03
Website:
Status: Complete
Category: Humor, Story, Relationship, Slash
Characters/Pairings: Col. Jack O'Neill, Dr. Daniel Jackson     Jack/Daniel      
Rating: G
Spoilers: Season 4 when they were a team
Permission to archive: Alpha Gate. Area 52, TheBoy, The Cartouche
Series: none
Notes: Friday Night Fic Challenge 1/31/03 for the_Alpha_Gate. and thanks to the Nashville Cats for the plot bunnies.
Warnings: This fic has the possibility of placing Jack and Daniel within the realm of Real Life. Please do no read if you do not wish to see the guys engaged in any of the following: Sleeping, Shopping, Cooking, Washing Dishes, Eating out, Filling the gas tank, Driving, Vomiting (in sickness not in torture).Being Tender and loving.and any other type of activity that constitutes life outside the SGC. Oh not beta'd and no toes in sight. See Devra, it works fine.

Disclaimer: SG-1 and its characters are the property of Showtime/ Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko roductions. I do not own the
characters and indeed am only playing with them for a little while. I am not making
any money from this and I'm still paying for everything I own so there's very little
point in suing me. No copyright infringement whatsoever is intended. The story is for entertainment purposes only. At least I hope it's entertaining. The original characters, situations and story are mine. Please check with me first if you want to archive or link to this story.

Summary: Jack and Daniel go shopping and Jack sees Danny in a whole new kink er, light.


Slash fic: A loving committed relationship between two people who just happen to be men.

Title: Incontrovertible Evidence Author: Debi C
Rating: G, no physical contact but lots of innuendo. Pairing: Jack/Daniel
Category: Challenge, Slash, Established Relationship, humor Status: Finished
Series: None
Season/Spoilers: Season 4
Archive: Alpha Gate. Area 52, TheBoy, The Cartouche. Anyone else please ask. Synopsis: Jack and Daniel go shopping and Jack sees Danny in a whole new kink er, light. Notes: Friday Night Fic Challenge 1/31/03 for theAlphaGate. and thanks to the Nashville Cats for the plot bunnies. W
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Warnings: This fic has the possibility of placing Jack and Daniel within the realm of Real Life. Please do no read if you do not wish to see the guys engaged in any of the following: Sleeping, Shopping, Cooking, Washing Dishes, Eating out, Filling the gas tank, Driving, Vomiting (in sickness not in torture)...Being Tender and loving...and any other type of activity that constitutes life outside the SGC. Oh not beta'd and no toes in sight. See Devra, it works fine.

Disclaimer:Stargate SG-1 and its characters are the property of Showtime/ Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. I do not own the characters and indeed am only playing with them for a little while. I am not making any money from this and I'm still paying for everything I own so there's very little point in suing me. No copyright infringement whatsoever is intended. The story is for entertainment purposes only. At least I hope it's entertaining. The original characters, situations and story are mine. Please check with me first if you want to archive or link to this story.

Incontrovertible Evidence
by Debi C

Jack walked briskly through the aisles of the SuperMart with his hand held red plastic basket full of packages of meat and canned vegetables. He was looking for Daniel and their shopping cart. The two men had finally had to bow to the inevitable and go shopping for food. After all even highly educated multilingual geniuses and Special Operations trained combat veterans needed to eat, and to eat one occasionally had to cook and to cook...well, you had to have someTHING to cook.

Both of them hated to shop, though they had discovered they each had some talent in the kitchen abeit in different directions. Jack preferred the All-American diet of meat, potatoes, and the staple veggies (corn, peas, and beans) with a little ice cream and cake thrown in for desert (and occasionally forays into the erotic). While Daniel had a bit more eclectic pallet and enjoyed preparing and eating French, German, Chinese and Middle Eastern dishes. He even knew how to saute', Brule and wok with the best of them.

So this afternoon the two of them had left the sanctuary of Jack's house to foray out looking for the ideal meal fixings for the rest of the weekend. When they reached the grocery store Jack had headed for the meat department. Daniel had gone in search of the perfect fresh ingredients for a surprise dish he was making for Jack that evening. That had been forty-five minutes ago. O'Neill had finally bowed to the inevitable and picked up one of the little plastic carry baskets that were made for the quickie shopper with just the mad dash in mind for the eggs, milk and bacon that always seemed to run out before the rest of the food.

But Daniel had disappeared almost an hour ago and he was almost, if not quite, worried about his partner. After all, what could happen? They were in a SuperMart on the outskirts of Colorado Springs. It wasn't as if they were on the trail of an evil alien bad guy on some exotic far away planet for crying out loud. But then, it was Daniel, after all.

Finally, Jack reached the produce aisle. He stopped in his tracks and looked down the bins full of fresh vegetables. There he saw the delectable Daniel completely involved and totally engrossed in feeling up veggies...literally! He was leaning across the display boxes, stretching out his long, lithe, lean form while reaching for the perfect eggplant; and all the while thoroughly entertaining five or six housewives and store clerks with his unknowing display of the perfect derriere.

Now, Jack had to admit, this wasn't your ordinary eggplant. It was a veritable king of it's kind, as large as a five-pound coffee can. It's color was a true deep royal purple, exactly the shade the ancient Etruscan's had extracted from that special shellfish and used only on robes of their ruling families. (He'd seen that on a History Channel program that Daniel had forced him to watch by performing certain acts upon his body while he had been unprepared for the vicious attack.) But now, Daniel had his talented sensitive hands all over the object of his desires. He was delicately squeezing, caressing, probing and, yes damn it, fondling the vegetable. The eggplant was examined, hefted, weighed and then, he sniffed it. Sniffed it! For Pete's sake, what was that all about?

But then the blessed fruit was laid gently in the basket, right next to the large cantaloupe, three different kinds of cheese, two large sweet onions, a large head of garlic and a container of fresh refrigerated egg noodles, extra wide.

Jack was just about to approach his significant other when Daniel, still not having noticed his lurking in behind the refrigerated salad shelves, turned to the counter filled with fifteen different types of tomatoes, where the fondling, caressing and sniffing began anew.

Finally, Jack couldn't abide any more produce abuse. He shifted the plastic carry basket to a more comfortable position on his arm and strode silently up to Daniel`s blind side. He stopped directly behind his lover and put both his hands on the other man's slim waist. "Gotcha! Caught in the act! I'm making a citizen's arrest for obscene and wanton acts of fruit fondling and vegetable molestation."

Daniel turned around, an unhappy expression on his face. He was still holding something gripped in his fist. A rich red flesh protruded from his hand, pale red liquid liberally dotted with tiny yellow seeds dripped between his fingers and down onto the white linoleum flooring of the store. He held his hand up a few inches in front of Jack's face directly in his line of sight. "Well, thanks to you Mister Produce Policeman, you can now add involuntary tomato slaughter to the list of crimes I'm accused of."

Jack cocked his head and looked at his beloved criminal. "I'm not surprised. You dastardly delinquent, there's no predicting the depth of your depravity." He smiled at Daniel. "Come on, lets go bail you out at the check stand so we can go home and explore each other's er, depths."

Daniel shook his head, "Might as well, I've got all I need for our Eggplant Parmesan tonight." He bagged some of the murdered fruit's kinfolk and added them to the cart.

Jack smiled at him. "Okay, I've got the ice cream, chocolate syrup and whipped cream...for desert."

"Yeah, you're all ready nuts." Daniel smiled sideways at him and licked his lips, moistening them with his tongue. "And they're just perfect.'

finished.
I'm sooo bad.


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