"Absolutely not; I forbid it."
"You're not my dad ."
"No," Tony repeated, shaking his head. "You and Cap? You'd be bad influences on each other. He'd become more of a smartass, and you wouldn't be as fun any more. You'd go all boy scout-y."
"He's the one who convinced her not to fill your suit with whipped cream," Jane spoke up.
Tony stared at Darcy. "It was filled with shaving cream," he recalled.
"Yeah," Darcy agreed, swinging her legs as she sat on the lab bench. "Easier to clean, wasn't it?"
"But that was... at least three weeks back," he said slowly.
"They met two months ago, Tony," Jane told him. "Where have you been ?"
"I've been... Are you serious? Two months ?!"
"Nobody tells me anything," he grumbled. "Fine, he's your Soulmate. Gimme all the details."
"Well, you know how much I love meeting new people—" He did. One of Darcy's Soulmarks was a polite greeting. "—so when Clint and Natasha asked me to go to the Thieves Guild one night, naturally I said yes."
"Time out," Tony interrupted. "‘Thieves Guild?’"
"It's their sneaky people club," Jane provided. "They practice tailing each other, compete by lifting small objects which they then have to return without the mark realizing they were gone, plus Clint's been training everyone to navigate the building using the ventilation system."
Darcy high fived her.
"Again, how did you not know that?"
"I'm... busy," Tony stammered.
" Anyway ," Darcy continued, "I complimented his score, he told me I was a dream come true, and the fates were pleased. The end."
"Not the end," Tony disagreed. "Does he know you're double 'Marked?"
" Yes ," Darcy said, annoyed. "Not that it's any of your business, but Steve is double 'Marked, too."
"Really?" Tony said, bobbing his eyebrows. "Have you—"
"No," Darcy interrupted. "I'm an old fashioned girl. I haven't seen his other 'Mark and he hasn't seen mine."
"Waiting for fate, eh?" Tony asked.
Darcy shook her head. "It's just another way of making my own, and Steve respects that."
"Mmm," Jane nodded. "But t hat's not the question you should be asking.”.
Tony looked confused. "What question should I be asking?"
"You should be asking what he stole that impressed Darcy so much," Jane told him "Or, more to the point, who he stole it from ."
Tony rolled his eyes.
"He swiped your watch!" Darcy giggled. "And he gave it to Pepper the next day and told her you let him borrow it!"
Jane joined in Darcy's laughter, but Tony seemed reluctant to laugh. "I guess that is pretty good," he said, but the look on his face told them he was already plotting to make sure it didn't happen again.
"Excuse me, sir," JARVIS interrupted politely. "But Ms. Hill has finished with Human Resources and is on her way up."
"Oh! I forgot that was today!" Tony said, clapping his hands to make the virtual model in the air before him disappear.
"Forgot what was today?" Jane asked. "We're supposed to be working on new specs for the Einstein-Rosen—"
"It'll only take a minute," Tony told her, as he rolled the sleeves of his shirt back down. He stuck his hand in his pocket, then frowned.
"Busted," said Darcy, holding out her hand, palm up.
Tony scowled and snatched back his cuff links, and Darcy hopped down from the bench to fetch his jacket. He gave her a distrustful glance but allowed her to help him into it anyway.
The elevator doors opened, and Maria Hill, former deputy director of S.H.I.E.L.D., walked into the lab. "Stark," she greeted, a small smile on her face.
"Hill! So glad you're here. Someone I can trust." He gave Darcy a dark glance at this, and she assumed an innocent look. "Your office is just downstairs, but first let me introduce—"
"Doctor Jane Foster," Hill interrupted, stepping forward to shake Jane's hand. "It's an honor."
"Thanks," Jane said apprehensively, likely due to her residual distaste for S.H.I.E.L.D.
"And this is Darcy Lewis, her assistant, who is apparently a thief, so keep an eye on your valuables," Tony continued.
"Okay..." Hill said, looking amused and unsure whether or not he was joking. She turned and offered her hand to Darcy, who shook it. "Pleased to meet you."
Hill looked between all three suspiciously as they all went silent. Darcy's eyes were wide with excitement, while Tony and Jane seemed to be waiting for something to happen.
"For my first trick," Darcy began, with a grin at Hill, "I think I'll steal your heart."
"Oh," Hill said. "That's..."
"Your Soulmate?" Jane guessed.
"But I had a tour all planned," Tony whined.
"Feel free to take the rest of the day off," Jane told the two fated women.
Tony opened his mouth to object, but Jane whacked him in the arm with the back of her hand. "Yeah, absolutely, nothing super important that can't be put off until tomorrow."
Hill turned toward the elevator and Darcy followed, still smiling. Behind her Soulmate's back, she waved at Jane excitedly and received an enthusiastic thumbs up in reply.
"So, I'm double 'Marked," Darcy said as soon as the doors closed.
"You are?" Maria asked, smiling down at her.
"Yeah, you're smiling, why are you smiling? Is it just because I'm cute?" Darcy said, unable to keep from smiling too.
"That could be part of it," her Soulmate replied. "I'm double 'Marked as well."
Darcy gasped. "We'll be one big polyamorous family," she said, slipping her hand into Maria's. "Have you met them?"
"Me too!" Darcy exclaimed. "Oh my god, I wonder if they're the same person!"
"You don't know already?" Maria asked.
Darcy shook her head. "I didn't want to mess with fate. I mean, I know it's fate and you're gonna meet the way you meet no matter what, but I wanted to meet you the same way I met my other Soulmate. I wanted to be surprised, y'know? You deserve the same amount of excitement and wonder from me as he got."
"That makes sense," Maria said, squeezing Darcy's hand.
"That's why I asked my Soulmate not to tell his other Soulmate about me until I met you. I've known people who are double 'Marked who were disappointed that their Soulmates didn't match each other. Like, can you imagine being disappointed about anything having to do with your Soulmate?"
"So are you hoping we have the same Soulmate, or not?" Maria asked.
Darcy shrugged. "Either way, I'm happy to have both of you, and happy you both have another Soulmate to love, too."
Maria smiled. "I like that."
Darcy grinned at her, then gasped. "Wanna meet? We can have dinner!"
Maria laughed, and the elevator came to a stop. "Actually, I think you and I might—"
The doors opened to reveal Steve standing there.
"You're Soulmates!" he exclaimed, holding up his phone. "Jane texted me!" A huge smile took over his face as he spotted their joined hands, and he stepped into the elevator with them, gathering them both in his arms for an enthusiastic hug.
"What were you saying?" Darcy asked Maria.
"I think you and I might have the same Soulmate," Maria finished. "We compared 'Marks and noticed the handwriting matched."
The doors closed behind Steve as he stepped back, and he was confronted with a frowning Darcy. "That is so cheating and I'm disappointed in both of you."
"Too disappointed to have sushi with us tonight?" Steve asked.
"Absolutely not," Darcy told him, going up on her tiptoes to kiss his cheek.
"I was going to take you out for coffee, Darcy, but maybe you two should help me get settled in my new place," Maria said.
"Yeah, we should probably get to know each other some place that isn't the elevator," Darcy agreed, pushing the button to open the doors again.
"So is that a yes or a no for sushi?" Steve wanted to know, flanking Maria as she led he and Darcy to her apartment.
"It's a yes," Maria said.
"But we'll probably order in," Darcy added.
Maria grinned at her. "I like you.”
Darcy grinned back. "Well, y'know, fate ."