"I thought I knew you better than this"
The words stung more than a knife ever could, especially coming from her. I guess I deserve them though, I let the Sweetroll Killer just walk out the door and back to Vvardenfell. I did it to ensure the safety of all the would-be victims, but Naryu doesn't see it that way. I know I made the right decision, Raz backed me up on it, but it sure feels like I didn't. If I could go back in time five minutes ago, though, I still wouldn't have killed Louna. The deal was that for her to live, Louna would have to call off the other fate-bearers. That means no one else would be hunting down Naryu (and the other targets) and she'd be safe. I did the right thing. I did the right thing. I did the right thing.
Repeating the words to myself still doesn't give me solace. The look on Naryu's face, the pure betrayal, it- it won't leave my head. Not when she storms out the door. Not when Raz sends his apprentice off and invites me to have a drink. And not on my way to the Inn.
"This one thinks you need something strong to drink, yes?" Raz's question snaps me out of my stupor, at least for the moment. "Hah... you could say that" is the half-hearted response I give back. Always a man of action, Raz cuts the chit-chat and heads over to the brewer, ordering, well, something. I overheard "...give this one the strongest you have" but that's about it. He returns with a couple of foul smelling drinks, sliding one over to me across table. "Thanks, Raz." I murmur over the rim of my mug, taking a deep swig. As always, it burns like the flames of oblivion going down. I shake my head roughly and cough in response to the sensation, but continue gulping down the drink because I need alcohol right now. I vaguely notice a glint of something silver in the corner of my vision, but pay it no attention for the moment.
I think it's about three mugs later when Raz finally gets overwhelmed by his curiosity and all-around nosiness. "This one must know, what troubles you, my friend?" He asks with a glimmer in his eye, obviously still sober, and having noticeably less mugs surrounding him. "I- it's... Naryu. I feel like I did the wrong thing. I mean, she looked so upset and hurt and it made me upset and hurt. Y'ffre's bones, I don't understand it! Seeing her so upset, because of what I did, it hurt more than any wound i've ever had! It was like someone reached into my chest, grabbed my heart, and started squeezing! I don't get it! I've never felt like this before, it feels like some sort of daedric magic is looming over me, altering my emotions and perceptions! I made the right decision! I did it to save Naryu, not to hurt her! Why can't she see that?! Why can't she see..." It all spilled out of me like a bursting dam, too fast for me to stop myself.
Raz chuckles, obviously amused, and purrs out "Ahaha! My friend, you do not understand, yes? It is not daedric magic that controls you, it is much more powerful than daedric magic! This one thinks you care deeply for the confusing Dark Elf, yes? By Jone and Jode, my friend, you are clueless!" Did he just say what I think he just said? "Raz- that's absurd! I- I don't care about Naryu! She's just some random, no-good, funny, talented, alluring... incredibly attractive... Dark Elf!" Oh. Oh. I see... "Okay, maybe you are right", I finally concede. Raz just chuckles again, pats me on the back, and sends me off to my room in the Inn.
When I start climbing up the stairs toward my room I swear I saw another flash of silver in the corner of my eye, but it could just be the drink getting to me. Eh, it's probably nothing. I arrive at my room, promptly lock and bolt the boor behind me, and plop down onto the bed to sleep off my drunkenness.
I awake, still in my armor from the night before. Right. I was hoping to forget about last night... Ugh. My head is pounding! What in Auri-El's name was in those drinks?! I haven't had a hangover like this since I killed Molag Bal! Rubbing my forehead, I sit up in bed to notice something sticking out from under the blankets. Huh. I don't remember putting anything in there...