Chapter 1: Opening Day
It was nearly the end of a long, tedious day at work, and it was only the first day. Opening day, as they call it at a ski resort. Kylo sighed, helping yet another small kid onto the chairlift. How he got stuck with the bunny hill lift on the first day of the season was a mystery to him. Most of the time, newer lift attendants would be stationed at the chairlift at the ski school area. Lifties who had been there a long time only had to work it a few times a month. Somehow, the universe was punishing him. Or the owner, Mr. Snoke. Whichever. Same thing. After Kylo had stopped helping Snoke terrorize the land owners surrounding the resort in an attempt to buy out their properties to expand, Snoke seemed hellbent on making Kylo quit. He couldn’t legally fire him for not being the muscle in his side projects, but he was making it very tempting to quit his job as a lift attendant and work elsewhere.
There was really only one thing keeping him at First Order Mountain. Or only one someone, rather. Rey. She worked in the ski school as an instructor, and Kylo had been enamored with her since he first laid eyes on her. She’d begun working only last season, and although they didn’t talk much anyway, Kylo had missed her terribly over the summer. When the ski season was over, he worked at a lumber company, clearing woods in southern Ontario where they lived. Rey worked at a local bakery during the summer. Thankfully, his workload as a lumberjack allowed him a large daily calorie intake, so he didn’t gain any weight despite his nearly daily visits to the bakery. He usually came up with some sort of excuse, like he was taking some bread over to his parents’ house, or he would pick up a box of donuts for the guys at work. He was worried that Rey saw through it, but she was always nice to him. Nicer than he deserved.
Now that the ski season had rolled around again, he’d get to see her every day. They only had full staff meetings with lifties, rental, patrol, and the ski school employees once a week, but he managed to run into her quite often. Lifties and ski school instructors shared the same locker room, and he managed to get a locker near hers, but not so close that it seemed intentional.
“So you’re back this season!” she said to him in that damn adorable chipper mood of hers on the first day back.
“Yeah,” he responded meekly, too intimidated to say much.
“It’s nice to see a familiar face. It looks like there’s a lot of turn around in the staff this year.”
“Snoke probably scared a lot of people off,” Kylo said with a frown.
“Hm,” she said, cocking her head in curiosity, “he doesn’t scare me.”
Kylo hoped that was true. That Snoke hadn’t found some sort of purpose for Rey yet, and was leaving her alone.
“I’m glad,” he said seriously.
Rey turned back to her locker, grabbing her gear for the day.
Before Kylo turned to leave, a sudden urge made him say something that maybe he shouldn’t have said.
“Yes?” Rey asked, turning back toward him with that cute, innocent expression.
“If he ever does, tell me.”
“You mean Snoke?” she asked.
“I gotta go,” he interjected, already regretting saying too much. He practically ran from the locker room, not waiting to hear if she was calling out for him.
That Kylo guy was weird. Why would Mr. Snoke scare her? Sure, he wasn’t the warmest, fuzziest guy, but Rey had dealt with much worse people before. You don’t age out of the foster system without meeting some really shitty people. She could handle Snoke. He didn’t even really seem to know her anyway. She’d only been on staff for one season, and hadn’t done anything in particular that would attract his attention. She was a good ski instructor. She was still only Level One, the lowest certification within the national ski instructor association, but she was planning on passing into Level Two that season, which would give her more credentials to teach intermediate skiers. Now, she mostly got never-evers and beginners, most of which were children. It was a good thing she loved kids. It made her job enjoyable.
She scoffed as she closed her locker, wondering if Kylo thought she was some sort of weak-spined doll, unable to hold her own against a mildly intimidating boss. It was out of character for him to say something like that to her. He was normally really nice. Quiet, but nice. She’d first noticed him last season. There were some good looking lifties, but he was definitely the hottest, at least to her. He had sort of a smoldering, brooding thing going on. She'd become even more attracted to him over the summer, when he came into the bakery in his flannel, sleeves rolled up to expose his forearms. She never got to see that kind of skin in the winter. But she noticed he didn’t really talk much with the rest of the staff. He was a bit of a loner. She also never saw him on break. The staff’s breaks throughout the day were scattered, so it was unlikely for them to have break at the same time often, but she’d never even seen him once in the cafeteria or the locker room during the day. The most she saw him was at the beginning or end of the workday, and when he was working the chairlift on the bunny hill, where she taught most of her lessons. Sometimes she would purposely avoid eye contact with him, just to make it seem like she didn’t notice him every time she went up the lift. She always noticed, though.
“Rey- don’t forget that you're on schedule to clean up the locker room today,” she heard a slick voice say from behind her.
She turned around to find none other than Armitage Hux staring at her from across the room. She couldn’t stand that guy. For some reason, he thought he was in charge just because he’d been working as an instructor the most number of seasons. But he wasn’t- Mr. Skywalker ran the ski school. Hux was just a bossy prat. And sometimes got way too up into her personal space. She couldn’t decide if he was hitting on her or trying to bully her.
“Yes, I know,” she replied in an even tone, hoping to end the conversation.
“The liftie scheduled for clean up today is Ren. Sounds like a riot- having to spend extra time with the staff freak,” Hux sneered, stalking toward her.
“Do you want me to wait for you, make sure you finish up ok? I could take you to dinner afterwards…” he said lowly, invading her personal bubble.
Really? It was opening day and he was already annoying her.
“No thanks, I’ll be fine,” she said curtly, shoving her way past him with a shudder. What a creep.
Hux always seemed to slip Kylo into conversation, spewing out what seemed like well-practiced insults. He said he hated the guy, but if that was so, why did he always bring him up? Sounded like a crush, if you asked Rey. The idea made her blush. She wouldn’t blame him for having a crush on Kylo. He had a bad boy with a heart of gold aesthetic that was hard to resist.
She checked the daily schedule on her way out of the locker room. It looked like people were hitting the slopes eagerly on the first day of the season- she had two private lessons and a group lesson. Busier than normal for the beginning of the season. It normally didn’t pick up so much until it got closer to the holidays. But Rey was thankful- more lessons meant more tips, and she was saving up to buy a motorcycle in the spring. She probably should prioritize replacing her shitty car which only made it through the snow to work about half of the time, but the motorcycle wouldn’t leave the front of her mind. It was impractical, but Rey was tired of having to be practical. She was forced to be practical her entire life, having to fend for herself as a child. She deserved something completely unnecessary but completely awesome.
She trudged out of the locker room with her skis and poles, making her way to the ski school meeting area to find her first client. Out of the corner of her eye, she could see Kylo arguing with Ms. Phasma, one of the staff managers. She saw him let out an exasperated sigh as he hung his head and turned around to walk toward the bunny hill. No wonder he was in such a bad mood, he was stuck with what everyone on staff called the “shit lift”. It was the chairlift that serviced the beginner’s hill where most parents took their small children and where ski instructors brought newbies to learn how to ski. This meant that the lifties would have to slow or completely stop the chair basically every other person, lifting kids on and off the chair, picking them up out of the snow when they fell off face-first. It was hard work lifting kids all day and helping beginners untangle their skis when they inevitably failed to get off the lift gracefully. Rey felt bad that he’d be stuck working it on the first day of the season, when everyone was trying to get their ski feet back under them by starting on the bunny hill. He’d be busy today.
Rey let out a little chuckle as she remembered how ridiculous he looked dealing with kids last season. He lifted them up as if they were baby with a dirty diaper, as far away from his body as possible. For some odd, unknown reason, they all loved him. Even some of the older kids managed to convince him to help them onto the lift despite being big enough and experienced enough to do it themselves. Rey guessed it was because he didn’t coddle them. Kids can tell when you treat them like an equal, and Kylo always spoke to them like they were adults, like they mattered. He was probably completely ignorant of how much the kids loved him and how often they asked Rey to go on whichever lift he happened to be working that day during lessons, and that kind of made Rey like him even more. Was it weird for her to imagine her coworker as a dad? That was doing weird things to her mind.
Chapter 2: Clean Up
At the end of the first day at the ski hill, Rey and Kylo are scheduled to clean up together.
Before she knew it, Rey’s work day was over. Satisfied with her quality of teaching and the tips in her pocket, she made her way to the locker room. As Hux had so graciously reminded her earlier, she was the instructor on schedule to clean up the locker room at the end of the day. It was a duty that rotated through each staff daily, meaning she’d have to do it every few weeks. How she got stuck with it on the first day of the season was beyond her.
At least Kylo Ren was the liftie scheduled to do it with her. She didn’t mind him. She kind of even liked him, maybe even a little too much. Finn, a fellow ski instructor, was her only close friend on the resort staff, but Ren made the list of acquaintances with whom she got along. They had a certain playful dynamic between them that always left Rey a bit confused as to her feelings for him, leaving her wondering if he also had a crush on her or if it was one-sided. Some days he teased her and joked with her, some days he remained silent and brooded in the corner. Some days, he even seemed kind of dangerous.
“Hey, Rey” he greeted her as she entered the locker room, where most of the staff was still changing layers and packing their things away. Not so dangerous today, apparently.
“Hey,” she said, shooting him a smile. “How was opening day?”
“Well,” he scoffed, hanging his uniform jacket in his locker, “you saw I was stuck on the bunny hill lift. I’ll just let that speak for itself.”
“Yeah,” she answered, opening her own locker. “Sorry about that, you had to pick up the kids I had today like a thousand times.”
“Not your fault,” he responded in that tantalizing deep voice of his, looking back at her with a friendly grin. A grin that was far too handsome on him. “You had your hands full with that group lesson. Three never-evers for one instructor? What was Luke thinking?”
“I guess he thought I could handle it,” Rey said, frowning at Kylo’s dig at Mr. Skywalker. As her boss at the ski school, he was actually a mentor of hers in many ways.
“Hey,” he said quietly, leaning toward her to regain her attention, “you did better than anyone on this staff would have done, that’s for sure.”
“Not true, but thanks,” she said, appreciating the way he looked into her eyes when he spoke to her. His brown eyes always changed with the light- sometimes dark and serious, sometimes rich and pensive, sometimes bright and jovial. She could easily get lost in them if she wasn’t careful. She wondered if people often complimented him on them. He didn’t really seem to have any friends on staff. Maybe he had a girlfriend he hung out with instead. A weird pang of emotion made her wince, but she was unable to identify it before a slimy voice called her from across the room.
“Rey!” she heard over her shoulder, looking behind her to find Hux yet again making his way over to her. She turned back toward her locker and sighed, an action she was sure Kylo didn’t miss.
“Don’t let Ren torment you tonight,” he said loudly as he came up right behind her. She looked over to see Kylo frown at Hux, anger brewing in his eyes. “He lacks what most people consider proper social decorum.”
“You know, Hux,” she said, spinning around to face the pest, “the only person tormenting me right now is you.”
Kylo remained silent as Hux released an evil cackle.
“You are too much, Rey,” he said. “My number is on the staff phone list on the bulletin board. Give me a call when he freaks you out, I’ll come and rescue you.”
“Fuck off, Hux,” Kylo said as he closed his locker behind him. Although Hux was tall, Kylo was even taller and more muscular. Rey certainly wouldn’t be messing with Kylo if she were Hux.
Hux clucked his tongue before responding.
“Now, now, Ren,” he sneered, “Mr. Snoke wouldn’t like it very much if he knew you were using such foul language at his resort, especially at another staff member.”
Rey could practically see the laser bolts Kylo was trying to fire with his eyes at Hux. Rey knew that something was up between Kylo and Snoke, but she didn’t know what. It sounded like Hux knew, and was using it to get under his skin.
She grabbed Kylo by the arm, pulling him toward her as she dragged him away from Hux before he got himself into any trouble. His hand accidentally grazed her thigh as she began to pull him, and she tried to dismiss the burning feeling it left in its wake.
“Catch you later, Armitage,” she said, guiding Kylo away from the ginger prick. Thankfully, Kylo softened in her hold, letting her lead him away.
She saw him make eye contact with her hands on his arm, and something in his expression flickered for a moment before it went neutral again.
“What an asshat,” he muttered under his breath.
Rey couldn’t hold back a chuckle. For some reason, she wasn’t really scared of Kylo. She had noticed that many of the other staff members seemed to give him a wide berth, and no one went out of their way to talk to him. She felt kind of bad for him, maybe his harsh exterior made it hard for him to make friends. She’d grown up in some rough families, so someone like Kylo didn’t phase her.
“Tell me about it. You’re lucky you’re not on the ski school staff with him. He’s such a dick I’m not even sure how he still has a job.”
“I’ve think I’ve got an idea,” Kylo said, peering back over in Hux’s direction darkly. Another secret that Rey wasn’t in on, then.
“Should we get started?” she asked, releasing his arm with some regret. It had felt really good in her hands.
Kylo watched Rey unlock the custodial closet and start pulling out the cleaning supplies they would need to tidy up the locker room. He couldn’t help but feel smug that he was on the schedule with her, not Hux. But even more satisfying than annoying his enemy was the fact that he got to spend more time with her. Let’s be honest. She was hot. But even more than that, she was different. Kind of like him, but in a less emo way. He wondered if she would ever go for a guy like him. He didn’t know of any relationships she’d been in since he met her, so he didn’t even know if she was into guys.
“Do you have a preference?” she asked him.
“What?” he asked, pulling himself out of his pondering.
“Do you have a preference?” she repeated, “Vacuuming or wiping things down?” She pointed to the vacuum and the supplies she’d just pulled out.
“Whatever you don’t want to do is fine with me.”
She nodded and took the vacuum for herself and plugged it into the closest outlet.
“Mind if I play some music?” she asked, waving her hand toward the ancient speakers someone had donated to the locker room ages ago, retrofitting them with an aux cord.
“Sure,” he said. “Go ahead.”
He watched her plug her phone into the cord, scrolling through some options before putting on David Bowie. He couldn’t help but smile. It was so British of her.
“Way to be a cliché,” he teased her.
She rolled her eyes at him with a smile.
“And what would we be listening to if we hooked up your phone- My Chemical Romance?”
Ben threw his head back with a rare hearty laugh. It was amazing how quickly she could improve his mood. His facial muscles were usually hardened into a frown of some sort, but they always got a work out from Rey.
“You got me- I won’t pretend like I didn’t listen to them when I was a teenager.”
“Don’t lie. You still listen to The Black Parade,” she quipped with a playful grin that was way too cute on her.
“Leave me alone,” he said, accompanying it with a smile to let her know he wasn’t serious. In fact if she never left him alone again he wouldn’t mind.
She chuckled as she turned on the vacuum, starting her path across the room. Kylo picked up some towels and multi-purpose cleaner. He started with all of the countertops and surfaces near the lockers., but he couldn’t help but look behind him to look at her every so often. After a while, it seemed like she must have gotten a bit warm, because she took off her hilariously oversized sweatshirt, leaving her in a tight little t-shirt and athletic leggings. Jesus Christ. Her outfit and her cute 3-bun hairstyle made her look impossibly sexy for having just worked a full day on the mountain. Kylo whipped his head back around, not wanting to be caught staring.
After a while, the vacuum powered down behind him. He was so focused on not turning around to look at Rey that he didn’t even hear her approach him from behind. He nearly jumped in surprise when she reached around him to grab a roll of paper towels off of the counter. He controlled his reaction, watching her slim wrist disappear quickly back behind him. He could only imagine how close she had been to his body. He suppressed a shudder.
They continued to work wordlessly, letting Bowie fill the space. Occasionally, he’d get a glimpse of Rey dancing a little bit to a particularly catchy song, and he’d have to conceal a smile. He smiled more around her than he did anyone else, and she wasn’t even trying to amuse him. She was dangerous.
They finished far too quickly, packing all of the supplies back to the closet.
“Well, that was fun,” Rey said dryly. “At least we won’t have to do it again for a while.”
“Yeah,” Kylo responded, trying not to sound too excited for their next clean up together.
They returned to their lockers, grabbed their belongings, and headed out to the parking lot together.
“I’ll see you tomorrow,” Rey said, her breath vaporizing in the cold outdoor air. She gave him one last shy smile before turning toward her car.
“Yeah, tomorrow,” he said sadly.
Kylo let out sigh as he settled into the driver’s seat of his SUV. He’d go home to his empty apartment, and probably drink until he fell asleep and dream of Rey in her leggings. Fuck. He started his engine, letting it warm up a bit before shifting into drive and pulling out of the parking lot.
He threw a last glance up to his rearview mirror, and saw Rey standing in front of her car with the hood up. Kylo immediately swerved around and drove up to her. He killed the ignition and hopped out of the car quickly, not enjoying how cold it had gotten since the sun had set.
“What’s wrong, you need a jump?” he asked as he approached her.
“Yeah, I do,” she said, looking damn near close to tears. “I’ve got some cables in the trunk, this happens all the time.”
Kylo felt bad that her car was so… well… shitty was the only word for it. And he resented that she apparently had to get it jumped frequently- for some reason he didn’t like the idea of her stranded on the side of the road somewhere or in an empty parking lot. He opened the hood of his SUV while she retrieved the cables from her trunk.
“Thanks again,” she said as he hooked up the cables to his battery. “Sorry to keep you here late like this.”
“It’s no problem,” he responded, hooking the other ends under the hood of her car.
“I really need a new car.”
“You should talk to my dad,” Kylo said before he could stop himself. Damn.
“Yeah… Han Solo? He owns Solo Cars in town? He’d probably give you a good payment plan if you say you’re a friend of mine.”
“Han Solo is your dad?!” she asked, a look of awe crossing her face. This is why he shouldn’t have said anything. People liked Han Solo, people were interested in him. And Kylo despised all the attention he got for being his son. It was a nightmare for an introvert like Kylo to be a part of his family, with the mayor of the town and a former American NASCAR star for parents. That’s why he had changed his name in the first place.
“Yeah,” he replied curtly before hopping back in his driver’s seat to start the engine. Rey took the hint and sat in her own car to do the same. She tried several times to start it, but it wouldn’t concede. Kylo turned off his own before getting out of his SUV to adjust the cables and try again. Still no satisfying roar of her engine.
“Fuck,” he heard her curse loudly from her driver’s seat, hitting her hand against the wheel. He shouldn’t have been amused by the situation, but hearing her curse in her little British accent was just too cute. He watched her take a deep breath, as if trying to calm herself, before she stepped back out of her car and into the cold.
“Sorry for wasting your time,” she said to him as she approached his open driver’s side door. Kylo turned off his ignition before stepping out into the cold with her.
“Don’t be sorry- I’m just sorry your car isn’t working.”
“I’ll figure something out,” she said, unhooking the cables and wrapping them around her arm in a loop before sliding them back into her trunk.
“Can I give you a ride home? It might be easier to deal with this tomorrow in the day time. At least it won’t be so cold.”
“No, I can’t do that to you. I’ll figure something out,” she said, her cheeks flushed from what Kylo assumed was probably a mix of embarrassment and windchill. “You go ahead.”
“Rey,” he laughed, “I’m not leaving you out here in the cold with no car. Let me give you a ride home. It’s no problem.”
She looked up at him with her expressive eyes, blinking at him a few times before giving in with a soft smile.
“Ok, thanks, I appreciate it.”
Chapter 3: Car Ride
Kylo gives Rey a ride home from work when her car won't start.
Fuck her shitty car. Rey didn’t have the time or cash to deal with it. At least Kylo was still there when it wouldn’t start. Otherwise she would’ve had to call Finn, who lived clear on the opposite side of town. She probably would have felt too guilty to even call him and make him drive all the way back to work. She probably would have ended up walking the 10 km back home in the cold.
“So where do you live?” Kylo asked as they pulled out of the parking lot in his SUV. She was grateful that he had cranked up the heat and even grabbed her a blanket out of the backseat to wrap around herself. He really was kind, no matter what people said about him. Not to mention how warm his hand was as it made contact with hers when he handed her the blanket. His hands were big, just like the rest of him. Not that she noticed.
“I’m at the end of Kensington Ave., do you know where that is?”
“Yeah, I do. So you live in a house?”
“Yeah, I inherited it from a great uncle of mine who passed away a few years ago. There’s no way I would be able to afford one myself. I didn’t even know I had any family until the attorney looked me up and found me.”
“You don’t have any family?”
She paused. She hadn’t really meant to bring it up. It was embarrassing to talk about, and it usually led to awkwardness she tended to actively avoid.
“No, I don’t. Just me.”
Awkward silence. She really didn’t know how to respond to an ‘Oh’. Usually people tried to apologize or sympathize. At least Kylo wasn’t doing any of that.
“So is that when you moved here? When you found out about him?” he asked after a few moments.
“Yeah. I was considering selling it, but I didn’t exactly have anywhere to live at the time anyway, so I figured I’d move up here and see if I could find work. I’m currently fixing it up, so I might sell it once I’m done and downsize to something smaller.”
“That’s smart,” Kylo said, a slight twinge of surprise in his voice. Rey tried to not take it personally.
More awkward silence ensued for a few seconds before Rey took the initiative to restart the conversation.
“What about you? Where do you live?” she asked, glancing over at him. It was hard not to appreciate the way the moonlight illuminated his profile. Some people would probably think his nose was too big, or his brow line too pronounced, but Rey thought he was kind of beautiful. You know, if he wasn’t so emo all of the time.
“Why?” he asked with a smirk, “Planning on stalking me?”
“I was just trying to make conversation, Kylo,” she quipped with a grimace. Finn was much easier to get along with. Kylo had a weird combination of darkness and humor that was hard to understand sometimes. He was… intense.
He let out a sigh before answering.
“I live sort of near the hospital, in the Riverside apartment complex.”
“Oh… I know where that is. There’s someone that lives there that orders a lot from the bakery, I had to make a ton of deliveries there over the summer.”
“The bakery delivers?!” Kylo asked, his voice going up in surprise. It sounded funny compared to his normal deep timber.
“Yeah,” she said smugly. “Now that you know, you won’t have to come in every day during the summer.”
“I don’t know about that,” he responded with a laugh. “I come in for the experience.”
“What does that mean?”
“If I didn’t come in person, I wouldn’t be able to see you.”
Rey turned her head to study his face. Was he serious? And even more importantly, was he flirting with her? Why was his face so unreadable?
“Theoretically,” she said, trying to conceal her baffled confusion, “you would still see me if I was the one making the delivery.”
“That’s true,” he said, “are you sure you’re not trying to stalk me?”
“You’re the one who just said you come to the bakery to see me!” Rey said, a blush building.
Kylo surprised her by laughing.
“I was just kidding, Rey,” he said, glancing over at her in her angered state, throwing her a devastatingly handsome grin.
Rey turned her head back toward the window, determined to not let him see her heated cheeks.
“So,” he resumed after a minute, “do you want a ride to work tomorrow morning? You know, since you won’t have your car?”
Rey hadn’t thought that far in advance. She could call Finn, but Kylo did live much closer to her, and he was offering.
“If it wouldn’t be too much trouble, I’d really appreciate it,” she said quietly. She didn’t like relying on people’s help for anything, but she really didn’t have much of a choice.
“It’s no problem,” he said lowly. “What time do you usually like to get at work?”
“We have our first check in at 7:30.”
“Damn, that’s early.”
“Yeah…” she said quickly, “I know that’s a lot earlier than liftie check in, you really don’t need to get up early just to give me a ride.”
“It’s cool,” Kylo said, reaching over to give her arm a playful shove, “I offered. I’m usually up then anyway, I’m an early riser.”
“Me too,” she responded, “if I’m not working by the time the sun rises I feel useless.”
“I usually work out in the morning before heading to the hill.”
Rey tried really hard not to imagine Kylo working out. From the small glimpses of skin and muscle she saw during the summer under his tight plaid flannel, she knew he was probably ripped.
“I’m afraid if I did that, I’d be dead by the end of the day. Lifting people off the ground all day is enough exercise for me,” she said.
“I can imagine,” Kylo said with a smile. “I’ve seen you lifting people twice your size before. I think you’re strong enough without any extra workouts.”
Rey suddenly felt embarrassed that he’d probably seen her struggling to lift her students off of the ground. She wasn’t the most graceful person in the world.
“You watch me during my lessons?”
“I watch everyone during their lessons,” he answered. “Keeps me entertained.”
That made sense. Being a liftie was very repetitive. She was sure watching beginners wiping out on the hill was probably the best part of his day.
“Well,” she said, “if you ever fall, give me a call and I can help lift you up. It’s pretty much my specialty.”
Kylo laughed softly.
“I don’t know, Rey. I don’t think you could lift me.”
“And why is that? You just said I was strong!” Rey sputtered.
“You are. But I’m a lot bigger than you. And probably heavier than most due to muscle. I wouldn’t want you to hurt your back or something.”
The reminder of their size difference made Rey bite her lip. She was strong for her size. But he was nearly 40 cm taller than her. And, as he so humbly described, very muscular. It didn’t take much imagination for her mind to wander and consider how easily he’d be able to lift her.
“Whatever,” she said, just to be contrary, “if I listened to men every time they told me I couldn’t do something, I’d have a sad life indeed.”
“Ok, ok,” Kylo conceded with a grin, “next time I fall, I promise to call you and you can prove me wrong. How’s that?”
Rey raised her head triumphantly. “Looking forward to it.”
Were they… friends now? That was the sort of thing she had with Finn- some sort of standing joke or bet. It felt like that’s what friends did. She didn’t really know. She hadn’t had many friends when she was in the foster system. Mostly just what she would classify as allies- other kids in the system who looked out for one another. But she had Finn now, and she was also friends with Rose, who worked at the bakery year-round. She had introduced her to Finn and they very quickly all became friends. She wasn’t sure how well Kylo would fit into their little group. Finn would probably hate him.
She wrapped the blanket he’d given her around her body tighter, pulling her knees up to her chest to encase herself in heat. She saw Kylo turn his head slightly to look at her, making a curious expression before he turned his gaze back to the road. She rather liked being driven around. It gave her a chance to stare out of the window. And it was nice being in an SUV, it was much higher than her sedan and it made her feel like they were levitating over the road instead of driving on it. She leaned her head against the window, watching a few snowflakes whizz by, adding to the deep snow their town already had. Her eyes began to glaze over as they crossed the bridge near the hospital. The soothing sound of the car’s engine was calming to her, and before she knew it her eyelids became heavy… it was getting hard to keep them open....
How Rey had managed to fall asleep within the span of two minutes was beyond him. She’d fallen asleep only 1 km away from her house. Kylo put the car in park and looked over, just watching her for a moment. She looked so at peace when she was asleep. Her knees were tucked up into her chest, and she had pulled the blanket all the way up to her chin, so she looked like some sort of giant lumpy egg with her head popping out. He felt bad that he had to wake her up. She must have had a long day.
He reached over to lightly touch her shoulder.
“Rey,” he said quietly, trying not to startle her, “we’re here.”
He watched her mumble something before adjusting her head and continuing to sleep.
He stroked her shoulder through the blanket.
“Rey, time to wake up,” he said a little bit louder.
She woke up at that.
“Kylo-” she said as she opened her eyes, frowning.
“Why are you grabbing my boob?”
Kylo’s eyes widened and went down to where he was touching her through the blanket.
“Shit!” he said, whipping his hand away from her.
“I’m sorry,” he said, “I thought it was your shoulder!”
“It’s ok,” she said with a sleepy grin, picking her head up off of the window and slowly unwrapping herself from the blanket. She shivered as she peeled it off of her and began to fold it.
“Thanks for the ride,” she said, handing him the blanket. “What time should I be ready tomorrow?”
“What?” Kylo asked, darting his eyes away from her chest which he had just touched back up to her face.
“What time are you going to pick me up?”
“Oh…” he said, “how about 7:15?”
“Works for me,” she said, reaching for the door handle.
“Again, I’m really sorry. For… you know… grabbing your…”
Her melodic laughter carried through his car, and flowed its way into his heart.
“Next time just buy me dinner first,” she said before stepping out and closing the door behind her, giving him a wave before turning toward her house.
Surely she had to be joking. Yeah, that was definitely a joke. But it didn’t stop Kylo from trying to remember what her ‘shoulder’ felt like before he realized it was, in fact, most definitely not her shoulder.
Well that went well.
He watched her let herself into her house and turn on a light before he pulled away and turned around at the dead end of her street. It was pretty dark, he wondered if Rey ever got scared or lonely living at the edge of the neighborhood, her house facing the dark forest. Probably not. She really didn’t seem like someone that was scared of anything. Based on how she had been willing to walk home 10 km at night, alone, he was probably way more concerned for her safety than she was, which was a weird revelation to have. He hadn’t imagined her living alone in a big house like that. With no family. No family anywhere. Damn.
He wasn’t exactly the most social person, but he wondered if even he was less lonely than her. At least he had his parents, who he didn’t exactly always get along with but at least tolerated. And he had Poe. They’d been friends since they were young, and had done everything together. He worked in ski patrol at the resort during the winter and at the lumber company with Kylo during the summer. They got to hang out every day in their secret spot during lunch and breaks. They were polar opposites in many ways, but their friendship was stronger because of it.
He knew Rey had at least one friend. She was always hanging out with another instructor at the resort. Not Hux, thankfully. A young black guy named Tim, or Lyn, or Finn or something. When had he become so invested in her personal life? It was one thing to be attracted to someone that was hot, but he never so actively thought about someone like this before. It was probably an obsession he should shake. He didn’t need anyone else. He preferred to be alone. But all that impatience and disdain he normally got when he had to interact with most people was absent when he was with Rey. That had to mean something. Maybe it was a sign. Or whatever. God, he was sounding to start like his crazy Uncle Luke. He pushed the ideas out of his head, and reminded himself that she probably didn’t even think about him at all, and that she would probably be creeped out if she knew how much he thought about her.
He pulled up outside of his building, trying not to miss the way Rey’s little body had curled up in his passenger’s seat. He’d give her a ride tomorrow- a casual ride. And try not to touch her breast again. Yeah, that was a good idea.
All aboard the slow burn express, y'all.
Chapter 4: Melting
Kylo does something nice for Rey, who doesn't know how to deal with everything going on with her.
thanks for all the support. you all are the best. hope you are having a nice week and enjoying the ski season!!!
there will be some more ski/snow action in future chapters, don't worry. =]
After trudging his way up to his apartment and pulling his snow-heavy boots off, Kylo poured himself a well-deserved glass of whiskey. He took a seat on his old, worn-out couch in the living area of his apartment– tumbler in one hand, phone in the other. He sipped on his drink while he listened to the line at the other end of the call ring.
“Hey, kid. What’s up?” Han’s voice cut through the phone.
“Hey, not much. You?”
“Can’t complain, can’t complain. Although your mother has me putting up Thanksgiving decorations already, a week early!”
Kylo could hear Leia shout something unintelligible but snarky-sounding in the background.
“Your mother says hi,” Han translated.
“Tell her I say hi back.”
“Will do. How was opening day?”
“More crowded than expected,” Kylo said, “we have almost all the trails open already. Uncle Luke expects the ski school to have a really busy season.”
“Snoke still terrorizing the staff?”
“Your mom hates that guy. He keeps trying to coerce people into selling their land to him, and she’s had to work overtime to keep him in check.”
Kylo’s mom had been dealing with Snoke and his cronies for decades, ever since she became mayor. The guilt is what had led him to eventually quit working for Snoke in a brute capacity. He just couldn’t take being up against his family anymore. He still worked at Snoke’s ski resort, but a large fraction of the town did, and at least he wasn’t still directly contributing to all the stress Leia faced at work.
“So what can I do for you?” Han asked.
“Well…” Kylo admitted slowly, “I kind of need a favor.”
“I had a feeling,” Han said, “it’s not often you call without being asked.”
“Whatever, so can you help me or not?”
“What is it?”
“It’s...” Kylo said carefully, “my friend. My friend’s car broke down in the parking lot at the hill today. I was wondering if you could send someone out there tomorrow to take a look at it.”
“Whose car? Poe’s?”
“You said a friend. You have friends other than Poe?”
“Shut up. Nevermind, if you’re going to be difficult about this– …”
“All right, all right. Don’t get your panties in a twist. Of course I’ll help. I’ll send someone out tomorrow. What’s his name?” Han asked
“Her name is Rey.”
“Ohhh, I see how it is.”
“See how what is?”
“It’s a lady friend,” Han said gleefully. Kylo could practically see the smug look on his face.
“It’s not like that, Dad.”
“Sure it’s not, kid.”
“She’s just a friend,” Kylo said sternly.
“Do you hear that, Leia? Ben’s got a lady friend!” he heard Han yell away from the phone.
“Damn it, Dad…”
“A what?!” he heard his mom yell, her clacking footsteps getting louder in his ear.
“You’re on speaker, kid,” Han said, much to Kylo’s horror.
“Who is she? Do I know her?” Leia asked, getting straight to the point.
“No, Mom, she’s just a friend. That’s it. She works at the ski school. Her car wouldn’t start in the lot today after work. So I was just asking Dad if he could help us– help her out.”
“Ben, you’re 26 years old and not getting any younger,” Leia said loudly. Kylo hoped the whole neighborhood wasn’t hearing their conversation. “How else are you going to give us grandkids? At least ask the girl out!”
“I’m not having this conversation.”
“Calm down, kid, we’re just teasing. I’ll get someone out there tomorrow to take a look. Have her leave the car unlocked and the keys in the ignition. Send me a photo of it in the morning so we know what to look for,” Han said, finally responding to Kylo’s inquiry.
“What kind of car is it?”
“It looks like an old Ford I think. Small sedan. Beige.”
“Got it. You think she’ll go out with you if we fix her car?”
“We will talk about this later, Benjamin Solo! I’m going to ask Luke about her!” Leia hollered into his ear.
“Bye,” he said quickly before hanging up. Every interaction with them was like getting teeth pulled. It’s why he only saw them in person once a week at maximum. And only for like an hour or two. Anything more would drive him insane.
He gulped down the last of his drink, wondering if it would be possible to put himself up for adoption at the age of 26 in order to find less embarrassing parents.
BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP
Rey smashed her alarm with her hand, bringing a blissful end to the beeping. She hadn’t slept well at all. And now she was a bit too warm, too flushed. She threw back the blankets, letting the chilly morning air hit her body. She’d practically sweat through her nightshirt, and her hair was stuck to her neck. She couldn’t remember the last time she felt quite so worked up.
Her dreams hadn’t brought her any rest, only stimulation. They featured long, dark hair, a large head between her legs, and a distinct lack of any real-life satisfaction.
She glanced over at the clock. 6:45. Perfect– just enough time to rub one out and quickly get ready before Kylo came to pick her up.
Kylo. Crap. He had long, dark hair.
She couldn’t deny that he had probably inspired her dream. She was so tightly wound that pretty much anyone that had given her a ride home would be featured in a sexy dream at this point. She really needed to get laid. She hadn’t had sex since she moved up into Ottawa, which was nearly a year and a half ago. In a smaller town, it was hard to justify hooking up with people– you’d probably end up seeing them all the time whether you wanted to or not. Rey just didn’t want to be known as the new girl who slept with everyone. At least not right away. Besides, it was hard to meet people with how often she worked. And she usually had a self-imposed policy of not sleeping with coworkers.
This kind of accidental celibacy was really taking its toll, it seemed. She stared up at the ceiling for a while, and found she couldn’t even remember sex. Not literally, of course, but it had been so long it was basically like she’d forgotten.
Glancing over at the clock, Rey was horrified to read it as 7:00. Where had the last fifteen minutes gone? She was supposed to be using that time to… relieve herself. Great, now she’d have to work the whole day wound up like this. God forbid she had to teach any men even remotely close to her age. She reluctantly pulled herself up and out of bed. She only had fifteen minutes to get changed, get her stuff ready, and grab a quick breakfast. As she glanced in the mirror, sticking her toothbrush into her mouth, she could see the full consequences of her frustrated nature. Her cheeks were bright red, and her eyes were glassy. Great. She splashed a large amount of cold water on her face, desperate to make herself look a little less sex-crazed.
She pulled her hair up into her usual three-bun style and made her way downstairs to her poorly-provisioned kitchen. It was lonely, living in such a big house with no one to share it. Her whole life, she had dreamed of having a real bedroom all to herself, a large house she could run around and call her own. Now, it was depressing. She didn’t have enough belongings to fill it out, so most of it was left empty. She burned her tongue on a bowl of microwave oatmeal and chugged a glass of orange juice, just finishing as she saw the lights of Kylo’s SUV pull up in front. The sun hadn’t risen yet, which meant it was extra cold. She threw on her final layers before heading out the door and locking up behind her.
“Hi,” she said as she pulled open the passenger side door and climbed into the seat.
“Hey,” Kylo said as she shut the door.
As soon as the door closed, a waft of something spicy and a bit musky hit her nose, Christ he smelled good. He must have just showered. He mentioned last night that he worked out in the mornings. Rey couldn’t help but wonder if it was an aftershave she was drooling over or just an abundance of his natural pheromones, invigorated by the exercise. She had to wiggle in her seat a bit, pressing her thighs together.
“Sorry again that you had to come out early just to pick me up,” she said, wringing her hands together. She still felt bad that she had to be there half an hour earlier than him and that he would have to wait around until his start time.
‘It’s no problem. I was up. I’ll just… sit by the fireplace in the lodge until my check in,” he said as he pulled away from her house.
“Is that where you normally go on breaks?”
“No,” he said. Rey noticed his brows furrowing slightly at the question.
“Oh,” she said. The mystery of why she never saw him around during lunch or breaks was still unsolved.
“Where do you go?” she asked, her curiosity getting the best of her.
“Well,” Kylo said, before the tension in his face broke and he let out an unexpected laugh, “it sounds kind of stupid saying it out loud, but my friend and I have a secret spot where we hang out.”
A friend? Like a girlfriend?
“Oh. Anyone I know?”
“Poe Dameron,” he answered, “he’s on ski patrol. Dark hair, kind of short, really loud and obnoxious?”
“The name sounds familiar,” she said, a weird sense of relief cutting through her. Not a girlfriend. But maybe his boyfriend? Although he probably wouldn’t be describing a partner as loud and obnoxious.
“Oh,” he said suddenly, “I forgot to mention. My dad is sending someone out to the mountain to look at your car today. Figured it would be good to get it looked at during the day so it might be ready for you by the time you get off.”
Rey’s jaw dropped a bit before she found the wherewithal to close it. He had done that for her? It was maybe the nicest thing anyone had ever done for her. She couldn’t hold back the deep blush that colored her cheeks. She was embarrassed, she was thankful, she was shocked.
He looked over at her when she hesitated.
“You really didn’t have to do that.”
“Why not? You need your car, right?” he asked, confused.
“Yeah… it’s just… thank you,” she said. She hadn’t done anything to earn his kindness. It gave her a weird feeling. She didn’t like to be in debt to anyone, and Kylo was helping her time and time again for no reason.
“Don’t thank me. Thank my dad. I just made a call.”
“Still, that’s really nice of you.”
He glanced over her again, and she couldn’t quite read what was behind his slightly concerned, slightly baffled, kind of tender expression.
“It’s really no problem,” he said, a note of finality in his tone, as if he wouldn’t accept her thanks.
Rey studied his profile as he drove them to work, perhaps staring a bit too blatantly. But it was hard not to when she was so physically pent up, and so emotionally vulnerable from his kindness. And when they were in such close proximity together in the car. He was tall and broad– and that appealed to the primal instinct within her that suggested maybe he’d be good at protecting someone. Or attacking.
“My dad said to unlock your car and leave the keys in the ignition. Someone will be by while we are working and take a look at it.”
Rey was wary of leaving it unlocked and with the keys in the ignition– she’d grown up hoarding all of her possessions close and locking everything that she could. She had to remind herself that she now lived in a nice town with a low crime rate and nice people that did things to help one another.
“Sure,” she responded.
Rey recognized the cars parked in the lot as those of her fellow ski school staff members as they pulled up, they were always first to arrive besides the overnight snow grooming staff. Guilt popped up again, and she apologized again to Kylo for making him arrive early.
“I’m only a half hour early,” he said with a mildly exasperated tone as he killed the engine, “I really don’t mind.”
Rey nodded, deciding to respect his tone and not repeat her apology. She hopped out of the passenger side, where no other than Armitage Hux was passing by on his way to the locker room.
She saw his eyes glaze over her before he stopped mid-stride and did a double take. She saw him look between her, the SUV, her again, and finally to Kylo walking around from the driver’s side. His nostrils flared and a deep frown appeared on his face, as if he had smelled something foul.
“Rey,” he said, not able to conceal a tone of disgust in his voice. “Good morning.”
“Hello, Ren,” he said, his eyes narrowing as he looked over to Kylo. “What brings you here so early?”
“Gave Rey a ride,” he said simply. Rey could tell by his posture and resigned look that he didn’t want to engage with Hux. They must have some sort of history, and Kylo looked like he was done with it.
“Why didn’t Rey drive herself?”
“I’m right here,” Rey snapped angrily.
Hux turned to her, and she could see him consciously try to soften his expression.
“Did you need a ride this morning? You could of called me, Rey,” he said softly, in a slimy voice.
“But I didn’t,” she responded, putting a hand on Kylo’s back to steer them away from Hux. She took off quickly, making it clear that the conversation was over.
What was with Hux? He’d been annoying last season, but it seemed ten times worse this season, and it was only the second day. And what did he have against Kylo?
“Sorry about that,” she heard Kylo mutter as she marched them to the locker room. She realized her hand was still on his back, and snatched it back.
“Why is he being particularly deuchy recently? And why doesn’t he like you?”
“Kind of a long story. He’s sort of my arch nemesis.”
Rey thought he was joking at first, but one look at him told her that he was serious, and that made her laugh harder than she would have at the joke.
“What?” he asked, looking at her struggling to breathe from laughter.
“Your– arch nemesis? What are you, a superhero?”
“Probably more like a villain,” he said with a smile, seeming to understand how absurd he sounded.
“And that makes Hux what, Superman?”
“No, probably just a rival villain.”
“You’re ridiculous,” she said, but with a smile.
She waved goodbye to him as she walked into the meeting room for the first ski school check in of the day with Luke. He waved back and stood there for a moment with a melancholy expression, sort of reminding Rey of a puppy being left at home alone by its owner. She wished he was coming into the meeting too, and that she could sit next to him, maybe whisper things to him that would make him chuckle, or watch him roll his eyes at one of Hux’s many interjections.
Chapter 5: Secret Spot
Rey meets up with Kylo on their break, and she finally sees his secret hang-out.
Kylo loved working the G chair. It was on the back of the mountain under some black diamonds and double black diamonds, which meant it was never very crowded, he didn’t have to help any kids onto the chair, and he could blast music on the old boombox without any parents complaining. It mostly served the chill, experienced skiers and boarders and the occasional visitor who had mistakenly took the wrong trail and ended up on the difficult side of the mountain, whom he would assure that they could reach the other faces from the top of the chair.
Yes, it was the best chair to work. There was only one bad thing about it─ he wouldn’t see Rey. Lessons were taught on easy and intermediate trails, so he never saw any instructors under the G chair unless they had some time off and were skiing for pleasure.
It began snowing around mid-morning, which at least helped alleviate some boredom. Snow meant that Kylo would have to shovel the loading area of the chair now and then to keep it clear, and used a broom to dust snow off of the chairs as they whizzed by. He wasn’t a chatty lifty, but there were a few regulars that would say hi to him, or make small talk about the weather. All in all, it had been a pretty good day thus far.
He was just about to be relieved for a break when someone in a bright blue ski school jacket came flying down the trail directly under the chair. They were clearly an excellent skier. As they got closer, Kylo recognized the purple stripes on the white helmet─ it was Rey. Kylo’s heart jumped a beat. He hadn’t expected to see her again that day, and found himself smiling, which was weird.
“Hey, Kylo!” she yelled as she skied right up next to the terminal, clipping out of her skis.
A couple that had been skiing the back face all morning zoomed into the loading area, and Rey patiently waited for Kylo to load them before responding to her.
“Hey!” he said, a bit more enthusiastically than anything else that morning. “What brings you over here?”
“I was looking for you!”
“I don’t have any more lessons this morning, and my next isn’t until later in the afternoon. Thought we could hang out.”
Kylo had to restrain the smile threatening to break out on his face. His neck was getting warm under his gaiter.
“How did you know I was back here?”
“I ran into Ms. Phasma and asked,” she said, “and she told me you’re going on break soon, too.”
“Can I please, please, please see your secret break spot?” she said, clasping her hands together in a pleading gesture.
“Uh, you really want to?” he asked, surprised.
“I think you’re overestimating how cool it is… even the locker room is nicer.”
“Yeah, but you’ll be there.”
“Did you just call me cool?”
“Maybe,” she said, raising an eyebrow at him.
“You’re just saying that to see the spot, aren’t you?”
“Ok,” he laughed, “Ryan will be here in a few minutes to switch out. I’ll be taking a snowmobile from here, so you could ski over and meet me?”
“Where is it?” she asked, waving her hands around with an adorable excitement.
“Meet me at the bottom of the C chair.”
“Will do!” she responded enthusiastically. Without further ado, she ran back to her skis to clip in and loaded herself onto the G chair, turning around to look back at him as she ascended. He gave her a wave, stomach feeling anxious as he thought about being alone with Rey in his tiny secret break spot. She was just a girl, why was he feeling this way?
As soon as she was out of sight, Kylo heard the familiar roar of a snowmobile engine approaching the chair. He turned around to see his coworker Ryan pull up to the terminal, hopping off of the vehicle.
“Hey, Kylo. Doing all right?”
“Best chair on the hill.”
“Ain’t that the truth.”
“See you in an hour,” he said, rushing to the snowmobile as soon as Ryan was in position, not wanting to waste a single minute of time he could be spending with Rey.
Kylo took off, going much faster than he normally would. He had to slow down on the higher-traffic trails, nodding to the skiers that waved at him. He pulled around and saw the C chair in the distance, and looked up the hill to see Rey floating down toward him, carving her way down the trail with immense control. Kylo was an alright skier, having basically grown up at the resort, but Rey was clearly more technically skilled than he.
He parked the snowmobile just as she came to a stop at the bottom of the chair.
“Rey!” he yelled, gesturing her to ski over to him. Her head whipped around and his heart clenched at the smile that she broke into before skating toward him.
“Hi! So where is this spot?”
“Just over there,” he said, pointing to the tiny, old, out-of-service ski patrol hut on the edge of the woods that had been empty ever since Kylo could remember. It’s entrance was partially obscured by overgrown trees that nobody had bothered to trim.
“The old ski patrol hut?” she asked, tilting her head to the side, unclipping her skis and hoisting them over her shoulder.
“Told you it wasn’t anything exciting,” he said as they started walking together.
“I didn’t even know you could get in there. It’s not locked?”
“It is,” Kylo said with a grin, “Poe managed to nick a key when we were teenagers. We’ve been hanging out in there ever since.”
“You’re joking, right?” he asked looking at the decrepit roofing and stained siding as they walked toward it.
“No! It’s weird, but I love little places that you can call your own. Somewhere private…” she trailed off, frowning.
“I just realized that I’m intruding on your private space,” she said, looking genuinely concerned.
“It’s an essentially an old closet, Rey. Trust me, you’re not intruding.”
“If you say so,” she said, still looking worried. “Will Poe mind?”
“Nah, Poe would love you.”
Rey didn’t respond, and turned to find her looking at him with a curious expression. He reached into his pocket to extract his copy of the key and unlock the door, holding it open for her to watch her face as she entered.
It wasn’t much- it was a glorified closet with a counter and a few chairs Poe and Kylo had managed to sneak into it several years ago. Electricity no longer ran to it, so it was always cold, which had lead them to hoard old blankets and keep them in the hut. They had a few random items they’d collected over the years─ a few flashlights, some old magazines, a chess set from when Kylo had tried to teach an impatient Poe to play, a few mismatched decks of cards, some random tennis balls, and a makeshift hammock that Poe had hung from two of the ceiling joists. They had a box they kept snacks in, although they’d always freeze and get hard. Kylo had eaten more hard granola bars over the years than he could count. There were a few empty six-packs, and a tiny basketball hoop they’d nailed into the far wall.
It was scrappy, but Rey was looking at it like she’d just entered the cave of wonders. She took off her helmet and gloves and placed them gently on the counter, peering out of the window that illuminated the hut in gentle natural sunlight.
“This is awesome!” she exclaimed, looking back at Kylo through the doorway. He really didn’t understand why she was so excited.
“If you say so,” he responded, stepping in behind her and closing the door. “Care for a seat?”
“Can I lay in the hammock?” she asked, eyes wide.
“Sure. You’ll probably fit in there better than me. I’m too tall for it.”
She practically jumped the two feet over to the hammock, and pretty ungracefully climbed in.
“Blanket?” he asked. “There’s no heat in here.”
“Please,” she said.
Kylo grabbed their best blanket and went to toss it at her, but her eyes were already closed in comfort.
“You’re welcome to sleep,” he chuckled, “but we have a strict every-man-for-himself policy in here. You’re responsible for waking up in time for your shift.”
He walked over to the hammock and awkwardly lay the blanket across her. Just as he was bending over to adjust it, she opened her eyes. Her face was inches from hers, and it made him jump back in surprise.
“Don’t worry, I’m not sleeping. Just really comfortable,” she said, tugging the blanket around her.
Kylo grabbed a blanket of his own, wrapping it around himself as he sat down in his usual chair.
“I’m glad you like it.”
“Do you ever get lonely in here?” she asked, turning herself in the hammock so that she faced him.
“Not really,” he answered honestly. “I’ve never been… much of a people person.”
“But you like Poe.”
“Yeah, we’ve been friends since we were kids.”
“That sounds nice.”
“Yeah, I guess it is.”
A moment of silence filled the hut before Rey spoke again.
“Thanks for showing me your secret lair.”
“I guess it’s not so secret now,” he laughed. “Don’t tell anyone about it, will you? If Snoke ever found out anyone was in here he’d for sure knock it down or change the locks.”
“My lips are sealed,” she said, smiling.
She was definitely the cutest thing that had ever been in their little hut. Kylo liked the way she looked in their hammock, cuddled up in a red blanket. They ended up talking for the entire hour, conversation flowing freely between them with an ease with which Kylo was completely unfamiliar. She didn’t seem to care about his awkward blunders or sometimes too serious demeanor. She looked at him like she was really listening, and cared about what he was saying. Kylo wished it hadn’t taken them a whole year to become friends. Before he knew it, a quick glance at the clock told him that he had to return to work.
“I’ve gotta get back to the chair,” he said with a sigh, trying to hide just how much he didn’t want to leave. He grabbed a protein bar from the snack box, having completely forgotten to eat lunch during his break.
“Oh…” Rey said, pushing the blanket off of herself as she began to sit up in the hammock.
“You can stay here,” he blurted out, his hand reaching up to smooth out his hair. “I mean… if you want.”
“You don’t mind me staying in your spot?”
“No,” he said, “I mean, no, I don’t mind. Feel free. The door locks behind you, so make sure you don’t leave anything in here when you leave.”
“Thanks, Kylo,” she said, giving him a soft smile that made him look at her lips. “I hate to take advantage of your hospitality, but Armitage is being a real dick today, and I’d rather just avoid him if possible.”
Kylo’s heart sunk at the knowledge that she hadn’t willingly come to be with him, she was just avoiding Hux.
“I get that,” he said, trying not to betray his hurt. He quickly turned toward the door to hide his face. “I’ll see you later.”
“Yeah,” she said behind him, with a softer, more tender voice that made him wince. “See you later.”
I know it's a slow burn y'all, I'm sorry!!! I just want them to be friennddssss first lol
Chapter 6: Day's End
Rey and Kylo make it to the end of the work day, where they finally split ways.
I tried my hand at making my first "aesthetic" I think it's called. No idea what I'm doing. Let me know what you think!
Rey’s best friend Finn always managed to brighten her day.
“...and then he told me the only reason he was doing the ski lesson was because his parents promised him ice cream if he behaved. I honestly don’t blame him, you could make me do just about anything if you promised me ice cream…” he finished his story as they walked into the locker room.
“Whew,” he said, “long day.”
“Lots of lessons?” Rey asked.
“Only a few. I had a long break in the middle of the day.”
“Really? I didn’t see you in the cafeteria for lunch.”
“I got lunch a little late,” she answered honestly, leaving out the part about Kylo’s hijacked hut. It wasn’t her secret to tell. And he’d been right- it had been nice to have some alone time. She’d spent her whole life alone, so she thought she’d be sick of it, but there was something to it that calmed her.
As if he’d heard her thinking about him, Kylo walked through the door of the locker room, shaking the snow off of himself like a dog before approaching.
“Hi,” she said meekly to his scowling face. Apparently he was moody again, resorting to the usual somber expression she saw him sporting. He nodded at her instead of responding.
She saw Finn look between the two of them after their exchange, or rather lack thereof, raising an eyebrow.
“Uh, Kylo,” she said as he passed by her to his own locker. “Have you ever met Finn?” she asked, introducing them.
“I’ve seen you around,” Kylo said quickly, making brief eye contact with Finn before turning back to his locker.
“Yeah…” Finn responded, “same. Nice to meet you.” Finn was always polite, even when people didn’t deserve it.
Kylo grunted instead of returning the sentiment. Rey tried to glare at him, but he kept his eyes fixated on his locker as he hung up his staff jacket.
“Well, Rey, I’ve gotta head out– you sure you don’t want to come with me and Rose to the movie?” Finn asked, still looking warily at Kylo.
“I’m sure. I need to deal with my car. You two have fun.”
“Ok, call me if you end up needing a ride.”
As soon as Finn left, Rey spun around and walked right up to Kylo.
“Is there something wrong with Finn?”
Kylo finally turned toward her, eyebrows furrowed.
“No,” he answered, “why?”
“I was just wondering because you basically just ignored him when I tried to introduce you.”
“Oh,” he responded, eyes widening a bit in understanding, looking behind him as if Finn might still be there for him to greet. “Sorry, I’m a bit distracted.”
Rey took a deep breath and tried to take it a little less personally. He had told her he wasn’t a people person, maybe his default mode of interaction was a bit rude.
“It’s ok,” she said. “Nevermind. Just thought I would introduce you two. He’s like my only friend… so…”
“Oh,” he repeated, looking at her with those same wide eyes. She stared for a moment, again appreciating their depth and brightness.
She thought he might say something else, but he just looked at her. She turned toward her own locker, grabbed her regular boots, and sat down on the bench to take off her ski boots. The blissful relief of taking ski boots off after a day on the mountain was a feeling like no other. Pretty much as good as an orgasm. Well, almost. She closed her eyes after she unbuckled them and pulled them off, leaning her head back against the wall and basking in the sweet feeling. When she opened her eyes, she found Kylo looking at her, his jaw slightly open, his hands frozen in the air with his personal jacket in them.
“What’s wrong?” she asked, confused by his staring.
“Nothing,” he said, as she watched him swallow and quickly put on his jacket, eyes blinking several times.
She continued her routine of switching her layers and packing up her ski equipment when Kylo sat on the bench next to her.
“So I think someone from my dad’s shop was here earlier. For your car?” he said.
“Oh!” she exclaimed, somehow having forgotten about his family’s unwarranted act of kindness.
“He texted me saying that it should be good to go. They put in a new fuel pump and a new battery.”
“What?!” Rey sputtered. A battery wasn’t too bad by itself, but fuel pumps were expensive. There was no way she could afford that in addition to the motorcycle she’d been dreaming of for the summer season.
“Yeah, he said to call if it stops working again.”
“How much do I owe him?” she asked, terrified of the answer. She had just started to build up a small savings for the first time in her life, and this was going to eat up a large chunk of it. She was not looking forward to going back to a paycheck-to-paycheck lifestyle, praying that no emergencies popped up.
“Oh,” he said nonchalantly, waving a hand. “Don’t worry about it.”
Don’t worry about it? What did that mean? Was he so rich that he just assumed that she could easily pay for a fuel pump and installation without batting an eyelash? She had to work for every cent and every privilege besides the old house that she had inherited from family she didn’t even know she’d had.
“I…” she stammered with embarrassment, “do have to worry about it… it’s sort of out of my… out of my budget.”
“Oh,” he said, placing one of his massive hands on her shoulder, “I meant… like… don’t worry about it as in it’s on the house.”
Rey’s jaw dropped. There was no way anyone could be this generous just for the hell of it. She’d always taken care of herself because people tended to screw you over once you got comfortable accepting their help. No one was in it for free, and she’d learned that the hard way.
“No… I can’t let you…”
“Really, Rey,” he said seriously squeezing her shoulder gently, “Han is always looking for an excuse to look like a hero. You’re actually doing him a favor.”
“I don’t feel comfortable owing anyone anything,” she said, standing suddenly in a panic, shrugging Kylo’s hand off.
Kylo held up his hands in a surrendering position, but remained seated as he looked up at her.
“You don’t owe anybody anything…” he said slowly, clearly trying to tread lightly around her.
“I’ll go to his shop tomorrow,” she said quickly, “I won’t be able to pay it all up front but I can work out a payment plan with him.”
“Rey,” he said more urgently, “really, it’s fine…”
“I can take care of myself,” she snapped, looking at him more firmly.
A few moments of silence and an intense stare-off passed before he finally looked down. She didn’t feel any triumph in winning.
“Ok… but don’t say I didn’t warn you when you go to the shop and he won’t let you pay.”
“We’ll see,” she answered tersely.
She watched him as he looked at his hands for a few more moments before he looked back up at her.
“Do you mind if I at least come along and make sure it starts up?” he asked quietly.
Rey felt bad for snapping at him when he looked at her like that and spoke to her more softly than he spoke to anyone.
“I… uh… yeah. Thank you,” she responded awkwardly. She stood for a moment before remembering that she would need to move her body to do so, quickly picking up her stuff, returning a few items to her locker, closing it, and heading toward the door on the parking lot side. The heavy footsteps behind her told her that Kylo was following. He stopped just outside of the driver’s seat door as she climbed in.
She opened the unlocked door of her old car, finding the keys in the ignition. She closed her eyes as she turned them, praying to the auto gods that it would start. She really just wanted to go home without having to get a ride from anyone.
Thankfully, the engine roared to life, quickly quieting to a soft purr. Rey let out her breath, her head falling back in relief.
“Thanks again for all of your help,” she said to Kylo, opening the door so that she could hear him.
“You’re welcome,” he said seriously, giving her one of his signature nods. She was starting to recognize his different nods– one to say hello, another for goodbye, one to express affirmation, another to signify understanding. He sometimes seemed to prefer communicating with as few words as possible, not wasting air on things that didn’t need to be said.
Rey plastered a smile on, feeling bad for snapping at him twice in the locker room. She hoped he couldn’t tell it was fake.
“I’ll see you tomorrow,” she said, keeping the door open to give him an opportunity to say something, anything that might lead to more conversation.
Kylo stood for a moment, looking as though he might say something, but eventually walked away without a word toward his SUV. Rey groaned, wishing she knew how to deal with people better. They’d been getting along so well until she must have said something wrong in the hut, and again in the locker room. Just when he had started to open up. No wonder she had so few friends.
“So what do you think?”
“What do I think?” Poe asked, taking a swig from his beer, eyes on the hockey game on the TV. “It sounds like you have the hots for her.”
“What?” Kylo said, glaring at his friend sprawled out in his favorite spot on his couch, “What? No, that’s… that’s not what I asked…”
“I’m sorry, what was the question again?”
“I asked you why she freaked out like that when I told her not to worry about the car repair!” he exclaimed, grabbing a beer of his own out of the fridge and plopping down into the recliner.
“Oh… right…” Poe said, swinging his legs off of the couch and onto the ground, finally turning to look at Kylo. “Well, if I had to guess, based on what you told me about her, it sounds like she probably doesn’t have much. No family? Old car? Moved here basically for the free housing? Maybe she’s not used to people doing her favors or buying her stuff. Maybe she just doesn’t know how to respond to that.”
“But what do I know? She’s your girlfriend,” Poe asked with a mischievous grin.
“She is not.”
“Didn’t you stalk her at the bakery last summer?”
“We’ve talked before, but giving her a ride yesterday when her car broke down was really the first time I got to know her.”
At this, Poe choked on a mouthful of beer, nearly spitting it out.
“You’ve known her a day and you let her in the hut?!?! You never let any of my boyfriends in the hut!”
“Again, she’s not my girlfriend,” Kylo said. But he did feel bad now that he thought about the situation. “Sorry. I promise you’ll like her.”
Poe leaned back on the couch, looking back at the TV. “Whatever man, at least you’re making friends now I guess.”
Kylo wanted to retort, but Poe was right. He really only had one friend, and it was kind of a miracle that Rey was actually still talking to him on purpose. Although the whole car thing was probably mostly the reason why. And he supposed she was probably mad at him for not meeting Finn properly. And for trying to give her the car repair for free. Shit.
“About that... she probably won’t be around anymore anyways. I think she’s pissed at me.”
Poe frowned over at him and pointed a finger.
“Oh no, no, no, you bring a girl into the hut, you make sure you stay friends! I’m not letting you push her away like you do with everyone else!”
Leave it to Poe to bare his deepest insecurities out in the air for everyone to hear.
“Have you ever tried being a not-so-surly version of yourself?” Poe asked. “Maybe people would respond to that.”
Kylo didn’t want to change himself just to make friends. That seemed unproductive, and he didn’t need friends anyway. He was fine by himself.
“Rey has always talked to me regardless of the surliness.”
“Which is even more of a reason to make sure she sticks around.”
“Fair enough,” he admitted.
He picked at the label on the beer bottle, trying to figure out exactly the circumstances that may have upset her over the past two days that were his fault, and things that she seemed to like. Was making friends always this difficult? How was Poe so good at it? He figured he better apologize to her for something, but he wasn’t exactly sure how to go about doing that. Apologizing wasn’t something he did very often. Or at all.
It would be so much easier to just close himself back up and go back to ignoring everyone but Poe at work. But somehow Rey had managed to weasel her way into his thoughts, really ever since she first showed up at the mountain a year ago. But it wasn’t until yesterday that he was able to make more than just small talk with her. And now he was addicted.
Chapter 7: Avoidance
Rey plans to give Kylo some space, but it doesn't go very well.
Rey decided to give Kylo some space. Maybe she’d come on too strong– asking him to show her his secret spot, introducing him to Finn. Maybe he was just being nice by asking his dad to sort out her car, maybe she had just imagined that it was some kind of offer of friendship. Maybe she was just so affection-starved that any kind gesture made her overeager. She’d probably made him uncomfortable, especially when she freaked out over the free car repair. She still didn’t intend to let them not charge her, but she should have acted a bit more thankful for the help and the way he set up the repair for her. Knowing her, she would have kept trying to fix it herself and would still be without a functioning vehicle.
The next day was cold, way too cold for so early in the season. The kind of cold that froze your entire nasal cavity and made your eyelashes crunchy. Thankfully, her lessons for the day were all with skiers who could at least stay upright and move along at a reasonable pace, so she was able to keep warm by skiing around. She’d been tempted many times last season to buy the fancy rechargable boot heaters that fit over your ski boots, but they were pricey and she wouldn’t need them every day. They would have helped on chilly days like this, though. She couldn’t imagine being a liftie on the particularly arctic days of the season, they couldn’t even move or ski around to keep warm. They just had to stand there for hours. At least they were usually out of the wind. She thought of Kylo standing by himself at a lift, all by himself. She felt bad before remembering that he much preferred to be alone over having to talk to strangers.
Her plan to give Kylo space lasted almost the whole day. She’d managed to avoid him in the morning, rushing to retrieve her gear from her locker and getting out on the hill as quickly as possible. To her advantage, he wasn’t working at any of the chair lifts on the beginner hills where she taught. But at the end of the day, he was there in the locker room, standing at his own which was nearly directly next to hers. And he saw her just as she walked in, so it wasn’t like she could just walk back out.
She smiled at him as she approached, trying not to smile too big– friendly, but not too friendly. He nodded in return, which completed their usual exchange from before the night he gave her a ride. She wanted to say something– it was becoming difficult to stick to her plan. It took her three tries to unlock her locker, distracted by his large, warm presence next to her. When she finally opened it, she turned toward him, succumbing to the urge to say something.
“Look, Rey–” he said at the same time as he turned toward her.
They both laughed at the blunder, the corners of Kylo’s mouth tilting upwards in a rare show of amusement.
“You go first,” she said.
“I just wanted to apologize for yesterday… I realized I sort of took over the whole situation with your car without asking you. I didn’t mean to tell you what to do…”
“It’s alright,” Rey interrupted. “I wasn’t very gracious in accepting your help. I really do appreciate what you and your dad did. I just can’t let him serve me for free, I hope you understand.”
“Yeah,” he said, nodding again. “I get it. Sorry.”
“Stop saying sorry.”
He winced as she laughed.
“My dad asked me to ask you if your car is still working well,” he said, pulling out his phone and pointing to it.
“It is! Please thank him for me, I won’t get a chance to go to his shop until I get a day off next week.”
She watched him type out a text, amused by the way his large fingers seemed to struggle operating a touch screen.
“Your turn,” he said after he finished, shooting a small smile at her. It was so rare for him to smile that anytime she caught a glimpse of one her heart melted a little bit.
“I… um…” she stammered. “Oh! Right! I wanted to thank you again for showing me the hut yesterday. Sorry if I made you show me your secret spot if you didn’t want to.”
“Oh,” he said, picking up his jacket out of his locker. “Don’t worry about it. It was fun. Just don’t tell Poe how easily you convinced me.”
“If I ever meet him, I won’t,” she assured him, sitting down on the bench behind them to take off her ski boots.
“Do you know your schedule for tomorrow?” he asked, turning around to face her. “Poe and I have the same breaks tomorrow, so we’ll both be in the hut if you want to meet him.”
“Are you sure? I don’t want to intrude.”
“Yeah, I’m sure,” he said, a surprised look on his face.
For a man that was so opposed to meeting Finn the day before, he sure seemed earnest for her to meet Poe. She knew who he was, of course. He was the young, handsome guy on ski patrol, the one that always made loud comments during the weekly resort staff meetings. How someone like that was friends with Kylo was beyond her. Kylo would never say something loud enough for everyone to hear in a million years.
“I’ll have to check, we don’t know our final schedule until the morning of, but if it’s still this cold tomorrow I’ll probably have a few breaks.”
“Ok, well, feel free to come by anytime.” He seemed sincere.
“Ok, I will.”
Maybe she hadn’t misread the signs. She was worried that her attraction to him made it seem like every little thing he did or said was an invitation to be his friend, but at least in that exchange he seemed to genuinely like her. Maybe she needed an objective opinion. She’d have to ask Finn.
She looked at the back of his head as he turned back toward his locker to organize his belongings. He pulled on a black (of course) beanie over his hair that still managed to look good even after spending a day being frozen by the subzero temperatures and under a Stormy Kromer that looked way too cute on him. She pulled her own messy hair into her three buns after taking her helmet off, wondering if she could ask him what products he used to keep his so nice.
She was just about to stand up and put her things away when Hux and two other instructors he hung out with came in. She watched as his eyes zeroed in on Kylo and he marched over to him.
“So, Ren. Good day on the hill?” he asked loudly, but in the least polite tone Rey had ever heard. His two cronies stood behind him, glaring at Kylo.
“Fine,” Kylo answered crisply, back to wearing the same scowl he always wore. Rey hated seeing it.
“Snoke asked about you today. Planning on avoiding him forever?”
“I’d like to,” he answered, slamming his locker door shut. Rey flinched at the loud bang.
“Pfft,” Hux scoffed. “You won’t work here for long with that kind of attitude. It won’t matter who your mother is.”
“Good talk, gotta go,” he replied, quickly turning and heading out the door without a second look back. She hadn’t even gotten a chance to say goodbye.
“Just don’t crawl back to me when he comes for you!” Hux shouted after him, rage flashing across his face.
He started to turn to face his comrades, but spotted Rey on the bench, where she had been hoping to stay unnoticed until he left.
“Rey!” he said suddenly, his expression turning to one of embarrassment before he managed to school it back to neutral. “Sorry you had to see that. Ren doesn’t know how to treat anyone with respect.”
“I don’t know Armitage, it seems to me like you’re the one with no respect,” she said fiercely. Maybe Kylo was her friend or maybe he wasn’t, but she at least could judge Hux’s character, and there wasn’t a good bone in his body.
“You’re defending him now?” Hux asked, eyebrows raised. “Has he managed to corrupt you into thinking he’s a good person?”
Rey paused at that, wondering what he meant.
“He hasn’t done anything,” she settled on, “you’re the one bothering him.”
Hux walked toward her slowly in a predatory fashion. If she hadn’t grown up fighting kids bigger than her in the foster system, she’d be scared. But Hux was a rich momma’s boy if she ever saw one, with a bark worse than his bite. She remained seated, unfazed.
“Don’t let him get in your head, lovely. Let me deal with him.”
At that, she stood up, knocking him with her shoulder as she walked toward her locker.
“Honestly Hux, where do you get off telling me what to do?”
“I’m just trying to protect you, beautiful,” he said in a tone that was anything but sincere.
She grimaced at her locker, resisting the urge to throw up.
“Protect me from what?”
“Oh, so you don’t know?”
She really didn’t want to fall for the bait, but she couldn’t help it.
“Know what?” she asked, turning back around.
“That he’s… dangerous,” Hux answered with a creepy smile.
“Doesn’t seem that dangerous to me.”
“Perhaps he’s convinced you that he’s changed, but deep down he’ll always be dark.”
At this point, Rey had no idea what he was talking about. But she was done pandering to him.
“I’m leaving, Armitage, go play your little games with someone else,” trying to look like she couldn’t care less.
“You come to me if he does anything to you!” he tried to command her as she walked out the door.
“In your dreams!” she shouted back, slamming it behind her.
“Ugghh!” she yelled once outside, kicking up a bootfull of snow as she entered the parking lot.
“Rey?” she heard a voice ask from her right.
“What?” she snapped, sick and tired of dealing with men for the day.
She turned to see Kylo there, nearly obscured in the quickly onsetting darkness of night.
“Did Hux say something to you?” he asked, looking worried.
“Is there something you’d like for him to say to me?” she asked angrily, looking at him pointedly. Why couldn’t people just say what they mean?
Kylo looked hurt by her anger, which felt a bit like being stabbed in the stomach.
“No… I just…” he mumbled, looking down.
“What is it, Kylo? Why does Hux keep harassing you and why am I being dragged into it?” she asked, unable to keep her frustration at bay.
“I’m sorry,” he said more a little more boldly, looking up and stepping toward her. “I used to work for Snoke with Hux and he’s been a dick about it ever since I quit. We did some pretty shitty things and he won’t let me forget it. But I’m just not like that anymore, and pretty much the only thing I can do is ignore him if I don’t want to get fired from the resort.”
Rey still didn’t quite understand, but she’d have more time to process it later.
“Ok,” she said after a moment.
“O...k…?” he asked, looking confused.
“Yeah, ok. I don’t really care what you did. I just don’t want to be involved in whatever is between the two of you.”
Kylo glared back at the door of the locker room, as if he was ready to go back in and fight.
“Yeah,” he said, “I don’t know what his thing is with you. He’s always annoying, but he seems particularly annoying when it comes to you. He probably saw you talking with me or something and decided to terrorize you just to get to me. Or maybe he likes you.”
“What a child.”
“Yeah, maybe we shouldn’t talk.”
“If it gets Hux off of your back, maybe we shouldn’t talk,” Kylo said, looking down at her feet instead of her eyes.
“Do you… not want to… talk?” she asked, bruised by his suggestion. Hadn’t they just had a pleasant conversation minutes before?
“No, I–” he hastily clarified. “I like… hanging out with you,” he admitted to her shoes.
Rey really wasn’t one to talk about her emotions, so the encounter was starting to embarrass the crap out of her. She knew Kylo probably felt the same way– the dude usually never even spoke to anyone unless it was to grunt or yell something rude.
“It’s settled, then.”
“What is?” he asked, looking up.
“Hux can go fuck himself. He can’t dictate who my friends are. And I really don’t care what he says about you.”
Her heart soared at the little half smile Kylo gave as he looked down again, shaking his head as if to hide his expression.
“Alright,” he said with finality.
“Good,” she said.
They stood there for a moment, unsure of how to end the conversation. Rey had realized pretty quickly that she was going to have to be the one to guide their interactions. For being older than her, Kylo sure wasn’t any better in the social skills department.
“Well,” she said, “I’ll see you tomorrow. Hopefully I can stop by the hut and meet Poe.”
“Yeah, hopefully,” he repeated, nodding.
“And don’t think I’ve forgotten about your promise– if you fall, call me so I can show you that I can, in fact, lift you.”
“I think I’d need your number for that,” he said, confidently pulling out his phone and handing it to her.
Her breath caught for a microsecond, thankfully too quick for him to notice. If he was interested in her like that, it would have been bold. But he wasn’t. He was just asking her for her number because they were friends. She put on a calm front as she typed her number into his phone, handing it back to him when she was done. Their fingers brushed as she did, and the hairs on the back of her neck stood on end like they did anytime they touched.
“See you tomorrow,” he said, shaking Rey out of her stupor.
“Yeah, tomorrow,” she responded weakly. Before she could stop herself, she slipped her arms under his to loosely wrap him in a hug. Just to say goodbye, like how any friends would. He didn’t seem to respond at first, and for an instant Rey was petrified that she’d made a fool of herself. Thankfully, she felt him reciprocate around her shoulders, patting her between the shoulder blades twice before letting go.
“Bye,” she said quickly, turning around abruptly and speedwalking to her car. She didn’t look back.
She threw herself into the driver’s seat, hastily starting the engine to turn on her nearly non-functional heating system. The moisture from her breath instantly vaporized with every exhale, quickly fogging up her windows. She cranked on the dash fan, waiting for the visibility to improve. She pulled her phone out of her pocket to see a missed text.
It read simply:
Chapter 8: War
When Rey meets Poe and gets invited to a special event.
“I fucking patted her on the back,” Kylo said to himself, reliving the incredibly awkward hug he’d had with Rey minutes prior. Somehow, he’d managed to get into his car without punching something in aggravation and embarrassment. Rey had hugged him, and the best he could do was pat her on the back.
“Like she was a dog,” he said, shaking his head, rubbing his face with his hands. He wasn’t usually so awkward with women, he usually didn’t have to try very hard. His dark demeanour typically did all of the work for him, and he wasn’t mad about it. It attracted a very certain type of girl, and they usually weren’t into hugging.
So no, he didn’t have a lot of experience hugging anyone except his mother, who forced him into embraces. He wasn’t exactly a huggable type– most people were actually kind of scared of him. So when Rey had sprung one on him, he didn’t have any sort of response prepared. She was always unpredictable, and he hated that. Or maybe he loved it. He wasn’t sure.
“You’re killing me, Ren,” he muttered, starting the engine. He accelerated out of the parking lot before anyone got a chance to see him talking to himself.
He took the long way home, needing some time in the cool air to think. Much to his distaste, he realized Poe was right. He couldn’t give up now. She’d called him her friend, which had to mean something. Although he knew he tended to read too much into things– a weakness of his. There was a part of him that wanted a friend, desperate for companionship. He’d always had Poe, but he was so lonely. But he also knew for a fact that he didn’t want to be just her friend. It was a delicate balance– did he settle for being her friend but always pining for her, or sacrifice the chance of a perfectly good friendship by making a move? It was so confusing. Rey was nothing like the girls he normally went for. If anything, she was pretty similar to his mother. He shuddered at the thought. Ok, he was never going down that train of thought again.
He pulled up to his building, where he’d be spending another night alone. There was a certain comfort in it–the familiarity of loneliness. He’d rather be alone than have to spend time with people that didn’t matter to him. He’d always been alone– an only child of busy parents, a solo studier at the local college while Poe attended uni down south, roommate-less since he was 18, a defector from Snoke’s mob. It was familiar, but it was getting old. As he unlocked his front door and turned on the lights in his sad little apartment, he found that he’d do anything to have Rey sitting on his couch, arguing with him over the hockey game. Instead, he’d spend another night alone, rereading the same books he always read, waiting to go to sleep.
It was a beautiful morning. But for some reason, Rey was nervous as she skied down under the C chair toward the old, out-of-service ski patrol hut that Kylo and Poe used as a secret hangout. Sure, Kylo had told her to come by if she got any breaks between lessons, but she found herself more and more anxious each time she saw him. It should make sense– she knew his large, looming presence and his sullen, gloomy persona scared most of the staff. But she had never been afraid of him, or anyone. No, something else was making her feel this way.
She unclipped from her skis, leaning them and her poles up against the side of the hut facing the woods to hide them from passerby– she’d hate to be the one that got them kicked out of the spot they’d had for years by drawing too much attention to it. She glanced around, making sure no one was watching as she approached the door and knocked. Not two seconds later, the young, handsome Poe opened the door, offering her a huge smile. She was nearly taken aback by how striking and commanding he was up close.
“You must be Rey. Quick, come in,” he welcomed her, poking his head out the door to survey the surroundings. She figured he must have been checking for anyone watching.
“Hi,” she said, immediately noticing Kylo lounging in the same chair he’d been in the first time she’d been allowed in the hut. Although it was a normal-sized armchair, he still looked too big for it. His thighs extended well past the seat, and his shoulders were nearly wider than the top of the back of it. She tried not to stare as she took off her gloves and her helmet and placed them on the counter.
“Hey,” he said, leaning forward as she walked in. If anyone else looked at him, they wouldn’t have noticed the way his eyes shone. While the rest of his face was stoic, his eyes communicated that he was happy to see her.
Poe closed the door behind them, placing a hand in front of Rey to introduce himself.
“I’m Poe,” he said with his dazzling smile, shaking the hand she extended in return.
“Nice to meet you,” she said, unable to resist smiling back. There was something magnetic about him. His rough, boyish features conveyed honesty, and made you believe you could tell him anything.
“So Kylo tells me you’ve been here once before. Welcome to our humble abode yet again.”
“Yeah,” she said, glancing over at Kylo, whose eyes were now very much not shining. “Thanks for having me, I love it. It can be so hard to find a quiet place here.”
“I can imagine with ski school that you must need a break from people once in a while,” Poe said.
Rey looked back at him, appreciating his understanding.
“Definitely,” she said. “I love teaching, but I’ve spent most of my life alone, so I really value my space and quiet time.”
“Kylo’s the same way,” Poe said, nodding his head toward his friend. Rey looked back at Kylo, who was looking at the floor near her feet.
“Would you like a seat?” Poe asked politely as Kylo remained silent.
“Yes, thank you,” she said. “Standing around in ski boots is the worst,” she added as she tried to gracefully sit down in an old, once-soft, purple velvet chair next to Kylo’s. It ended up more as a flop, and she sunk so far down into the ancient chair that her feet left the ground.
Poe laughed at her as he sat in his own chair, and she even saw Kylo’s mouth turn up in amusement as she tried to pull herself back out.
“Sorry,” Poe said between bouts of laughter, “I should have warned you about Old Bertha. She tends to swallow you. You should probably just stay down there– we’ll help you get out when your break ends.”
“You knew this would happen,” she directed at Kylo with a frown. Her feet dangled helplessly in the air, ass so far down in the chair it might never be found again.
“Maybe,” he said, his mouth tensing in effort as if trying to keep a smile back.
“You guys are the worst.”
“Hey!” Poe said, propping his feet up on another wrinkly chair next to him, “Consider it initiation for hut privileges. You’re a Hut Boy now.”
Kylo groaned next to her, covering his eyes with his hands.
“You call yourselves Hut Boys? That’s adorable.”
“You hear that, Ren?” Poe asked, throwing a spare tennis ball from the counter at Kylo, “The first and last time anyone will ever call you adorable.”
Rey blushed– she hadn’t meant it that way, but there were certainly some things she found adorable about Kylo. Thankfully, she found that he was blushing even harder than her when she snuck a peak over at him. He threw the tennis ball back at Poe with gusto.
“How did Kylo make such a delightful, lovely friend anyway? Did he blackmail you?” Poe asked, miraculously catching the pelted tennis ball and shooting it into the mini basketball hoop screwed into a ceiling joist.
“No,” she said defensively as she saw Kylo glare at Poe. She knew he was kidding, but it bothered her for some reason, maybe because she knew it would bother Kylo. “I don’t know… we’re… just… we had…” Why could she not think of anything?!?
“We both hate Hux,” Kylo said, saving her. She supposed it was one of the first things that ever led them to talk to each other, but she hoped he knew that wasn’t the only reason she liked him.
Poe laughed, seeming to accept the answer.
“Ah, that skinny, pasty motherfucker. He really needs to get that stick out of his ass.”
“Yeah. He seems to take some perverse pleasure in tormenting me daily,” Rey said, shuddering with loathing. “My friend Finn sometimes has to hold me back from snapping at him.”
“You’re friends with Finn?” Poe asked earnestly.
“Yeah, do you know him?”
“No… I… not really,” he said, looking flustered and running a hand through his hair.
“We both started on staff last season,” she said with a smile, “and quickly realized Hux was an ass.”
“Want me to spook him?” Poe asked animatedly, as if he would jump up and defend her right in that moment. “We can’t have him messing with another one of our Hut Boys.”
At least now she knew that Poe knew what was going on between Kylo and Hux. She was glad he had someone to talk to. She looked at him, expecting to find him embarrassed again by the use of ‘Hut Boys’, but instead he was just scowling at Poe.
“I can take care of it,” he said lowly, leaning toward Poe an inch. Poe expression faltered a bit, a questioning look appearing for a microsecond before he smiled again. What was that about?
“I’m fine,” she said, hoping to diffuse any tension. “I’d drop him in about two seconds flat if he tried anything.”
Poe raised his eyebrows at that.
“Woah, feisty. No wonder Kylo likes you.”
She wished the chair would swallow the rest of her. Poe hadn’t meant it like that, but damn if she didn’t wish it were true.
“So,” Kylo said loudly, rising from his chair. He grabbed a scrappy-looking deck of cards from the counter and pulled up a rusted metal stool between their three chairs. “Anyone for cards?”
“I’m in,” Poe said, taking his booted feet off of the chair and sitting up. “Rey?”
Rey looked between the two of them, suddenly embarrassed. She didn’t know any card games. She’d once found half of a deck under the couch in a group home she lived in when she was a teenager, but she pretty much just looked at the symbols on them and used them to scrape dirt out from under her fingernails.
“Sure,” she said, tentatively.
“Rummy?” Kylo asked, shuffling the cards in his hands.
“I don’t know that one,” she said, fiddling nervously with the zipper on her jacket.
“How about poker?” Poe suggested.
“Sorry…” she said, wincing, “I actually don’t know any card games.”
“You don’t know any card games?” Kylo asked, baffled.
Rey swallowed back the lump in her throat, shaking her head.
“We’ll teach you!” Poe said enthusiastically. “Let’s just start with War.”
Rey listened carefully as Poe explained the simple rules, but kept sneaking glances at Kylo, who was staring at her unabashedly. Did she have something on her face?
“And that’s it,” Poe finished. “Deal us in, Kylo.”
Rey’s hands trembled as she watched Kylo’s large ones distribute the cards. They looked soft yet leathery, like they’d keep hers warm.
“Ready?” Poe asked when they each had their stack. “Draw.”
Kylo won the first round, beating out Poe’s 3 and Rey’s 9 with a Queen. The luck of the draw was on his side as his pile grew and grew while Rey’s and Poe’s dwindled.
“I declare an alliance!” Poe said after a few minutes.
“Hey,” Kylo said competitively, “no alliances!”
“Don’t be such a spoilsport, Ren. Rey– let’s join our stacks and make an alliance.”
“Oooh,” she said, looking at her pathetic pile which had no chances of beating Kylo on it’s own. “I like the sound of that.”
“And thus the Hut Boy Rebel Alliance was formed!” Poe shouted, handing his stack over to Rey, which she added to her own. “It’s a trick his mom taught me,” he added in a whisper.
“You’ll never defeat me,” Kylo said with a wicked smile. “I’ve got all of the power cards.”
“We’ll see about that,” she said, refusing to back down from his dare.
In the end, Kylo still won.
“Every time!” Poe shouted in frustration, throwing his hands in the air. “It should be statistically impossible to win even the luck–based games!”
“I’m Han Solo’s son,” Kylo said, shrugging. “I’m genetically designed to win card games.”
“Speaking of Han,” Poe said, turning back toward Rey, “are you coming to Thanksgiving?”
“Thanksgiving?” she asked, confused.
“Yeah,” Poe said as Kylo shook his head furiously. “Thanksgiving at Kylo’s parents’ house this week. We’ll be there.”
“Wasn’t Thanksgiving like a month ago?”
“Kylo’s dad is American, so they do it twice. Something about ‘American tradition’ and ‘football’ and stuff like that.”
Rey looked over at Kylo, who looked mortified.
“I don’t want to invite myself…”
“Nonsense,” Poe answered, “I’m inviting you. You can be my guest. There will be a bunch of people, you won’t be intruding.”
Rey watched Kylo glare daggers at Poe, who wasn’t paying attention.
“Well…” she said, tempted to give in to Poe and his irresistible cuteness.
“She’d be my guest,” Kylo blurted out, making them both turn toward him. “I’m the one that introduced you.”
“Excellent,” Poe said, not skipping a beat. “You’ll be Kylo’s guest, then. It’ll be fun, trust me.”
“Ok...” she said, not sure exactly what was happening. She supposed she was joining them for American Thanksgiving? What an odd turn of events. Kylo looked deeply uncomfortable, which is not what she wanted.
“You really don’t have to invite me…” she started.
“You’ll love it,” Poe insisted, “Han makes us watch the Mountain Lions game on TV and we all eat way too much of Maz’s pie. It’s a good time.”
“Lions,” Kylo muttered.
“What?” she asked.
“It’s just the ‘Lions’, not the ‘Mountain Li–’ ok you know what? Nevermind. Yeah, Rey, you should come. No pressure, though. I mean whatever.”
Poe threw an indecipherable look over at Kylo. Did they want her to come or not?
“Uh… sure. What should I bring?”
“Just bring your enchanting self, Rey,” Poe said, plastering a smile back on his face. She saw Kylo roll his eyes in her peripheral.
“I’ll bring something,” she argued, refusing to freeload off of Kylo and family for even a second longer. First the ride, then the car repair, then the hut, then Poe, and now Thanksgiving? It was like she was gaining a second life from befriending Kylo. And what had she given him? Nothing.
“That’s Thursday, right?” she asked. Kylo nodded. “That should work for me. I have Thursday and Friday off anyway.”
“Starts at 1:00,” Kylo said.
“Early enough for the football games. Food will be served all day, but dinner will start later in the evening. It’s an… event,” he said with a sigh. Rey figured he probably hated such a thing– a whole day’s worth of social activity. Maybe she would find a way to cheer him up.
“Ok. I’ll be there. Can you text me the address?”
“Sure,” he said, pulling out his phone.
Rey looked back at Poe to see a self-satisfied smirk on his face. The guy was like a cartoon character.
“Weelllllll,” he said, pushing himself up out of his chair and onto his feet. “I’ve gotta get back on the clock. And I need to go hit the john and the cafeteria before I do. Catch you two later.”
“Bye!” Rey said, “It was nice to finally meet you!”
“Likewise, Sunshine,” he said, winking at her before closing the door behind him.
Rey looked back at Kylo, who was just finishing typing out his parent’s address.
“Ok,” he said, “sent.”
“Thanks,” she said, feeling the corresponding buzz in her pocket. “It sounded like Poe was really excited but I totally get it if you don’t want me to come…”
“No!” he said forcefully. “I mean,” he lowered his voice, “no, it’d be cool if you came. My parents are just... they’re kind of crazy. So... just warning you.”
“I’m sure they’re not crazier than any of my foster parents.”
Kylo nodded at that, and she realized that there was no way to gracefully respond to that.
“Hey, at least I’ll get a chance to talk to your dad, about my car.”
“Yeah,” he said, clearing his throat. “Don’t let him talk your ear off about it, though. He won’t ever stop talking about cars if you get him going.”
“I’ll be careful,” she said, laughing.
She reached over, grabbing the deck of cards that were still in his hands. She slowly rifled through them, glancing at each card.
“What are you doing?”
“Making sure you weren’t cheating,” she joked.
“Hey!” he said, grabbing the cards back and holding them away from her. She tried not to shiver from the warmth of his hands.
“That’s not fair!” she argued, “I can’t reach over when I’m stuck in this damn chair like this!”
She wriggled her arms and legs in the air in demonstration.
“Ok, you helpless child,” he teased, standing up. He stood in front of her and grabbed her flailing hands. “Time to get you out of Old Bertha.”
With one swift pull, he managed to extract her from the armchair, flinging her toward him with too much momentum. She ended up crashing into his chest, grabbing at him frantically as she struggled to find solid footing in her clunky ski boots. With an ‘oof’ expelling from his chest as she knocked into him, Kylo wrapped his arms around her to steady her. A few clumsy steps later, she managed to upright herself, and was able to fully comprehend just how close she was to him, pulled tight against his body. She felt his warm breath on her face as she looked up at him. After watching his Adam’s apple bob, her eyes carved their way up his jaw, across his full lips, over his nose, and up to his deep brown eyes that seemed to glisten with the light coming in from the solitary window of the hut.
The spell was broken when they heard the door suddenly open from the other side of the room.
“Forgot my fanny pack…” Poe said loudly, stopping in his tracks when he spotted the two of them.
They jumped apart quickly, as if scorched by the contact. It was the closest they’d ever been to each other. Even closer than their awkward half-hug the evening prior.
“Thanks for helping me get out of that death trap,” Rey said quickly, pointing to Old Bertha.
“No problem,” Kylo responded instantly, rubbing the back of his head with his hand and looking everywhere but her.
“No canoodling in the hut!” Poe said with a smirk, snatching his ski patrol fanny pack from the counter and fastening it around his waist.
“Oh… we weren’t…” she started.
“That’s not…” Kylo explained.
“I don’t want to hear it!” Poe said sternly. “I forbid it!” he shouted as he exited again. Rey could have sworn she saw him smile.
“He’s always like that,” Kylo said as the door closed. “Ignore him.”
“Yeah,” Rey said in a forced casual tone, “ok.”
“Unfortunately my break is about over,” he said, gesturing to the old clock on the wall. “But again, you’re welcome to stay here if you want. I’ll make a copy of the key for you sometime this week so you can come whenever.”
“Really?” she asked, surprised.
“Well, according to Poe, you’re a Hut Boy now,” he said, closing his eyes in embarrassment of the term.
“It’s an honor,” she said, mock curtsying as gracefully as she could in her ski boots.
“Don’t do that,” he grumbled, heading for the door.
“What did you say, Lord Hut Boy?”
Rey couldn’t help but smile as he closed the door behind him. Her face hurt from how hard she was smiling. Woah, what a weird feeling.
Before she could process what a bad decision it would be, she sunk back into Old Bertha, sighing. She knew she’d eventually struggle getting back out of it, but she needed to sit and think about Kylo. She’d never been to a family holiday before. Finn usually went east to visit his cousins, and she wasn’t good enough friends with Rose to ask, not that she’d ever work up the courage to ask. But here she was, going to what sounded like a family holiday with two people she’d only recently met or got to know. She wondered what real parents were like, especially with adult children. Did Kylo have any siblings? He never mentioned any, but then again she barely knew anything about him. Just that she liked him way too much for her own good.
She threw her head back against the soft cushion Old Bertha provided, tracing the old wooden beams of the hut ceiling with her eyes, wondering what they had seen of Kylo as he grew up here. When had he gotten so lonesome, so isolated? It was a miracle he had Poe, but Rey got the impression he was not one to give up on people easily. She wanted to be there for Kylo the same way Poe was, to let him know that he wasn’t alone. That there were people just as lonely, or even more so, than him. People like her, that didn’t belong anywhere, or to anyone.
She looked over at his chair, imagining him sitting there, looking at her. Would it be so far-fetched for him to like her as more than just a friend. She craved touch and affection, as much as she tried to convince herself otherwise– that she was fine on her own. But she wasn’t. And he was just so fucking handsome and so kind even if he was a bit spiky around the edges. She’d always been attracted to danger, so it only made him more attractive to her. She closed her eyes, trying to imagine him smiling at her with those mischievous eyes of his.
Chapter 9: Thanksgiving, Part I
American Thanksgiving Day arrives, and our little Canadian sweethearts are nervous.
The night before the American Thanksgiving at Kylo’s parent’s house, she had Finn and Rose over to play their usual board games and sip cheap wine in front of the fireplace in her living room. She had only furnished the half of the room near the fireplace, but it was cozy. Having them over made her house feel less huge, less lonely. She’d considered asking them to move in with her, and would have charged them far less than their current rents, but she kept telling herself that she’d finish fixing it up and sell it, and wouldn’t want to make them move out. Now, nearly a year and a half after moving in, it was still nowhere near ready to put on the market. And despite finding it sad and empty, she couldn’t bring herself to sell it. Her family had lived here. Or at least a great uncle. Sure, she’d never met the guy, but the fact that the house was her only connection to a possibility of belonging made it special, and something she couldn’t quite convince herself to give up.
As they played Monopoly on the small rug in front of the fireplace, Rey asked Finn and Rose if they knew anything about American Thanksgiving. Rose, who had family in New York, piped up.
“It’s pretty much the same as regular Thanksgiving, just a different day. And there’s a huge parade in Manhattan that they broadcast on TV,” she said.
Rey nodded her head, pretending like she was familiar with what people did on ‘regular Thanksgiving’.
“Why?” Finn asked.
“I’m… going to the Organa-Solo’s house tomorrow for it.”
“Woah,” Rose said, a look of wonder on her face. “The mayor’s house? How did you get invited to that?”
“Their son invited me.”
“Who’s their son?” Finn asked, throwing another log on the fire.
“Kylo Ren – the liftie who was rude to you the other day when I introduced you,” Rey responded with a smile, remembering the awkward encounter.
“That guy is the mayor’s son?” he asked, huffing.
“Yup,” she said, sipping her wine. She understood the surprise. He was nothing like his mother.
“Did he invite you like… as a date?” Rose asked, looking excited.
Rey nearly spit out her wine, instead choking it back.
“No,” she said around coughs, feeling her ears heat up, “no. Just as a friend. Actually, technically his friend Poe invited me. It’s a big gathering apparently.”
“Poe as in ski patrol Poe?” Finn asked earnestly.
“Yeah, do you know him?” Rey asked.
“Not really,” Finn responded, looking down, shuffling through his Monopoly money.
“He’s Kylo’s best friend,” she informed him, reaching over to the bowl of pretzels to grab a handful.
“Sounds like it will be fun!” Rose enthused, sipping from her own glass.
“Yeah, I guess…” she said, looking into the fire and biting her lip.
“What’s wrong?” Finn asked, familiar with her expressions.
“I guess I’m just...nervous,” she responded, smiling timidly. “I’m not great in large social settings, it’s a bit overwhelming for me. I can do ski instructing because I have some sort of purpose, but the thought of a party is kind of intimidating.”
“Hey,” Rose said, reaching over to rub her back gently, “it’ll be great. If a purpose makes you feel better, than make one!”
“What do you mean?”
“Give yourself from tasks! Like, try to learn one thing about each person there. Or count how many times a particular word is said, or make bets on the football games or something.”
“That’s a good idea,” Finn said, nodding appreciatively.
It was. Rose was truly a saint. She’d practically adopted Rey when first moved to their town in northern Ottawa and started working at the bakery. She had a strong maternal instinct and knew how to connect with people in a way that made them comfortable. Rey had been slow to open up, but she found it easy with Rose. She had honesty and kindness that Rey had never known before.
“I could do that,” Rey said, smiling at her. She’d have to come up with something when she got there and assessed the situation.
She looked between her two friends, thankful that she’d found them, and for some reason they’d stuck around. Rey wondered if it would ever be that way with Kylo, or even Poe. Her newly discovered yearning for friendship left her craving more. Relationships were a new concept to her, and she couldn’t get enough. She wanted something with Kylo, she knew it. His attractiveness and ability to make her smile in his own sinister, weird way confused her. Just the thought of him made her insides heat up, rendering the fire redundant. She was too unsure to tell Finn and Rose. She still guarded her heart strongly, afraid of rejection. She’d have to keep herself in check, not allow herself to swoon over him just because he was being himself.
“Isn’t Kylo the guy that Hux hates?” Finn asked, reattaining Rey’s attention.
“What? Oh, yeah.”
“Well,” Finn scoffed, “the enemy of my enemy is my friend I guess.”
“He’s actually nice, at least to me. He apologized to me that he was rude meeting you, wish he would do the same to you,” she said, looking back into the fire.
“Rey…” Finn said, glancing over at Rose conspiratorially, “are you sure you don’t like Kylo?”
“What? No! I...I don’t… we’re just… it’s not like that!”
“That was convincing!” Rose giggled, making Rey throw a pretzel at her.
“What would be so bad about liking him?” Finn asked.
Rey honestly did not know how to respond, mouth gaping, looking for an answer. It wouldn’t be… she supposed. Except for the possibility for rejection if she ever acted on it. And she liked having him as an ally, as a friend.
“Let’s just keep playing,” she said instead, picking up the dice and rolling. She tried to ignore the looks Finn and Rose gave each other as she moved her piece across the board.
The next morning, Rey got up early for once on her day off. She hadn’t anticipated having big plans for her first day off of the season, but here she was – awake and baking bread for the American Thanksgiving holiday at Kylo’s parents’ house. She wasn’t much of a cook, having grown up eating whatever she could scavenge, but working summers at the bakery at least had her well-versed in bread. She even had her own sourdough starters and everything. She wasn’t very familiar with what was normally served at holiday meals, but she figured a rosemary focaccia seemed festive enough. It had a pretty brief proofing time, so it was perfect to make in a morning. She didn’t have a mixer, but that was fine because she preferred to knead by hand anyway.
By the time noon rolled around, she’d been so consumed by bread-making that she hadn’t given a single thought to her attire. What did people normally wear for holidays with family? Was she supposed to dress up? She didn’t even have nice clothes. She whipped out her phone to text Kylo.
hey, it’s Rey. what’s the dress code for this thing? formal?
She rifled through her closet, searching for pieces of clothing that didn’t have some sort of food stain or holes in them. Why didn’t she own any nice clothes? Now that she had an income, she should really invest in some. Clothes had never been a priority for her growing up, but now she was a functioning adult, and really should at least own a nice pair of slacks or something.
Her phone buzzed in her pocket with Kylo’s response.
Definitely not formal. I’d recommend something with an elastic waistband – my mother won’t rest until you’ve eaten so much you can’t walk.
she sounds awesome
You’ll be begging for mercy by the end, just warning you.
you’re so dramatic
That’s sort of my thing.
Rey snorted. Kylo was many things, but at least he was self-aware. She set down her phone, relieved that she wouldn't be underdressed. Kylo didn’t really seem like the type to care too much about appearances, but she was still anxious about embarrassing herself in front of his parents, especially since she’d never been to a family holiday before, and didn’t even know the first thing about American Thanksgiving. Keeping Kylo’s suggestion for a flexible waistband in mind, she pulled out some stretchy black leggings that had had pockets on them to make them look less like leggings and more like pants, and a longer grey sweater that wouldn’t cling to her stomach. She slipped on her nicest pair of shoes- some clean-ish blue loafers that at least didn’t have any holes in them.
She tried her best to apply the minimal makeup she owned, fiddling with a dull eyeliner and some mascara, attempting to look less like a teenage boy. It was one thing to look that way at work – almost no one tried to keep up appearances on the mountain. But the thought of spending a whole day with Kylo without the safety of her helmet or facemask left her feeling exposed.
Was she… nervous? She really never got nervous for anything. She was normally tough and gritty, and was never really afraid to take on anything that came her way. But just thinking about Kylo in normal indoor clothes, strewn across a sofa made her throat tighten microscopically, and her top teeth dig into her bottom lip. This was ridiculous. Attraction aside, everything would be normal, like hanging out with him and Poe in the hut, which she’d already done several times that week. She even had a key for herself, which Kylo made for her. Hut boys. Friends. Yeah.
“BEN!” Kylo heard his mother scream from the kitchen. “You told Rey to come at 1, right? This isn’t going to be like that time you invited your high school girlfriend to come for the minimum amount of time possible, right?!”
“First of all,” Kylo shouted back, walking briskly toward the kitchen. He needed to make this clear yet again. “Rey is not my girlfriend. Just friends. Secondly, yes, I told her 1,” he said, trying to make eye contact with Leia as she darted to and fro across the kitchen.
“Good,” she said, not acknowledging that she understood his correction. “Be a dear and grab the quiche out of the refrigerator and pop it in the oven, will you?”
He sighed as he did as he requested. Stupid Poe. Now Rey would be subjected to the embarrassment that was his parents. Part of him was anxious in a good way to spend nearly the whole day with her, but the other part was dreading exposing her to his family. What would she think of him after today?
Han strolled into the kitchen, followed by Maz and Chewie, longtime family friends. Maz owned the busiest local bar, and Chewie was Han’s right hand man at the auto shop.
“Is Poe here yet?” Han asked, stealing some grapes out of a bowl while Leia wasn’t looking.
“He’s on his way,” Kylo answered.
“And your lady friend?” Maz asked.
Great. Apparently his parents had told everyone in the galaxy about Rey.
“Rey. Just a friend,” he emphasized. “She’ll be here at 1.”
“A pretty friend,” Chewie mumbled mischievously.
“You know her?!” Leia asked, whirling around from her position at the sink to question Chewie.
“She works at the bakery,” he shrugged. Everyone knew that Chewie had a sweet tooth.
“Anyway,” Kylo said, about ready to die. “I’m going to chop up some firewood for later.”
He bolted out of the kitchen before anyone else could interrogate him. No doubt they would talk about him while he was gone. As an only child to parents with lots of family friends, all of the attention tended to be laid on him. For good and for bad. Maz, Chewie, and his Uncle Luke all knew everything there was to know about him, from when he was potty-trained to his first girlfriend to when he worked for Snoke. There was no escape.
He grabbed an axe from the garage and switched into some steel-toed boots. Splitting wood always helped him release energy. And he had enough nervous energy to chop down an entire forest. Summers were usually a low-stress time for him because of all of the manual labor he got to do at the lumber yard. Winters tended to leave him a bit more tightly wound. He got to work, hauling logs from the stockpile at the edge of the yard toward the house, splitting them one-by-one into usable sized chunks. It was therapeutic for him – the swinging of the axe, the sound of the wood splitting. It was like music.
He saw Poe pull up on his motorcycle, an old Harley Davidson his parents had left behind. They were always in some random country doing humanitarian work, even when Poe was a teenager. So he was more like a brother than a friend, practically living at his parents’ house during those years. He was pretty sure Leia liked Poe more than him, which was fine. Less attention on him. He waved over at him as he made his way into the house. Not long after, his Uncle Luke pulled up in his old pick up, having to help his ancient border collie R2 out of the front seat. They also waved over at Kylo. Luke had built the area’s only Buddhist temple, so people came from all over to attend. His parents had tried to get him involved, but it wasn't for him. It caused more tension between him and his uncle than it was worth, so they both decided it would be better for their relationship to let it go.
Kylo continued to split wood, definitely more than was needed. But he needed a way to preoccupy his mind and blunt the edginess concerned with Rey. He liked her so fucking much, which became worse each time they hung out. She’d been coming to the hut for nearly a week now, and he had a hard time keeping his hands to himself and respecting their friendship by not ruining everything. Every once in a while, it seemed like she could possibly be attracted to him too, but then everything would go back to normal, so it was probably just his imagination. He didn’t know how much longer he could just pretend he didn’t want her. Would he have to spend the rest of his life like this? If anything, today was definitely not the day to do anything about it. His family would never let him hear the end of it.
After a while, his coat became too warm with all of the labor. He tossed it off, reveling in the feeling of the cool air against his skin under his flannel.
A few other cars pulled up as he continued to haul more logs toward the house. One of his mother’s coworkers Mr. Ackbar and his wife, Han’s old friend Lando, and Mr. Threepio, their elderly neighbor who was kind of annoying but very loyal to their family.
In the middle of splitting his second pile of wood, Kylo spotted Rey’s old sedan park across the street. He stopped to watch as she ducked out of the front seat and fumbled around in the back, retrieving some sort of basket. He had told her not to bring anything, but she hadn’t listened. He loved that she purposefully disobeyed him, for some reason.
“Rey!” he shouted, waving his hand at her, trying not to look to enthusiastic.
She whirled her head from side to side, searching for the source of the call. When she spotted him, her face split into a wide grin that made his own mouth smile in return. She closed the doors of her car and crossed the road, walking straight toward him at the side of the house.
“Hi,” she said, once she was close. “Firewood?” she asked, waving her free hand at the piles of timber.
“Yeah,” he said, “I’m almost done if you want to wait, then I can take you inside,” he said. He really didn’t want to unleash his family on her without any defence.
“Ok,” she said, smiling again.
She looked so damn pretty with her hair up in those three buns, in tight pants that hugged her fit legs. He had to expend a lot of effort to look away and keep chopping.
“Poe’s here,” he said between swings. “But I’m not sure if you’ll know everyone else. A lot of family friends. They’re nice though. Well, most of them.”
“Hopefully they’ll like me,” she said.
He stopped chopping to look at her. That was definitely not what he had meant.
“They’ll love you,” he said firmly, “I was actually just going to warn you that they will probably do their best to embarass me, as usual,” he added, turning back to his pile.
He saw her shift and blush out of the corner of his eye. Was she nervous to meet them? Why would she be? She was literally the best person he knew.
She let him fly through the rest of the pile in silence. He could feel her eyes on him, which made him nervous. If he wasn’t so experienced, he would have probably missed a swing by now.
When he was done, he wiped his forehead with the sleeve of his flannel.
“Ok, that should do it. I’m just going to load some into the wheelbarrow and put it on the porch.”
“Do you need any help?” she asked as he picked up the wheelbarrow.
“Nah,” he answered. “I’m good. Wouldn’t want you to get dirty.”
Rey’s eyes went wide. Had he offended her by refusing her help? He quickly stacked the blocks and kindling into the wheelbarrow and threw his coat over his shoulder, nodding his head to her as he started toward the porch.
“Do you watch the NFL?” he asked as he emptied the load onto the elevated platform of the porch.
“The what?” she asked.
“The American football league,” he answered.
“No,” she answered, “I don’t even really know how football works. My schools had teams but I never went to any games, and I didn’t have TV growing up.”
“Oh,” he answered inelegantly. He always managed to bring up topics she was unfamiliar with because of her history in group homes and the foster system. He didn’t intend to, and it always made him sad to learn about what he had apparently taken for granted and she had never experienced.
“Well,” he said, trying to recover, “don’t tell my dad that. He will spend the entire day trying to teach you and then convert you into a Detroit Lions fan.”
“That doesn’t sound so bad,” she said happily.
He shamefully realized that maybe she had never had a dad that tried to control her interests. How he continued to say the wrong things astounded him.
“That’s about it,” he said, restacking the last of the firewood. “Let’s head in.”
He stepped in front of her to open the door for her, gesturing her inside. Hopefully Poe would help him out today and help defend her from the onslaught of his family. It was going to be a long day.
Chapter 10: Thanksgiving, Part II
Rey and Kylo join the Thanksgiving party.
“Thanks,” Rey said as Kylo opened the front door of his parent’s house for her. She was already a bit overwhelmed. She had pulled up to the house only to find him chopping wood – a real-life, visual manifestation of all of her lumberjack fantasies she’d had about him ever since she learned he worked at the lumber yard in the summers. And then he’d made her sit and watch while he did it. He clearly had no idea what he was doing to her, which only made him more attractive. He’d been breathing hard, sweat forming on his brow as he wiped it off with the sleeve of his flannel, his thick brows furrowed as he swung the axe.
She wiped her feet on the mat inside the doorway as he closed the door behind him. She was still holding the basket with the bread she made, anxiously awaiting an introduction to his parents, to whom she would offer it.
“So, this is my parents’ house,” Kylo said behind her as he toed off his dirty boots.
“Should I take my shoes off?” she asked.
“You don’t have to. You’re welcome to if you want, though.”
She kept hers on, not wanting to make herself too comfortable on the verge of rudeness.
At that moment, a mini hurricane in the shape of a petite woman with an elaborate updo of graying brown hair stormed into the foyer. She immediately beelined toward Rey.
“You must be Rey,” she said, reaching out to hold Rey’s arms in greeting as her hands were occupied by the basket.
“Hi, Mayor Organa. It’s so nice to meet you,” she said.
“Please, call me Leia. There will be no discussion of politics on my husband’s favorite holiday. Come in, come in,” she responded, tugging on Rey’s arms to lead her into the house.
Rey looked back at Kylo, who looked very resigned to the fact that his mother was whisking her away. He shrugged his shoulders and nodded to indicate that he would follow.
“I made some bread this morning,” Rey said, extending the basket toward Leia.
“Oh, honey. That’s very nice of you. Focaccia? Wow. You should teach Ben how to bake bread,” she said without breathing, taking the basket from her as they entered the crowded kitchen where people were already gathered, laughing over drinks.
“Ben?” she asked as she took off her coat.
Leia turned around with a scowl. Thankfully it was directed at her son, and not at her.
“You haven’t even told the poor girl your real name?” she demanded sternly, taking Rey’s coat from her and hanging it on the nearest hook.
“I hadn’t gotten around to it...,” he said, avoiding eye contact with Rey.
“Your name is Ben?” she asked incredulously. ‘Kylo’ was such a cool, sexy name. She thought it matched him perfectly. ‘Ben’ was just… cute. She probably should have wondered before why his last name was ‘Ren’ and not ‘Organa’ or ‘Solo’. Now she supposed he made up a new last name to add to his fake first name.
“Where did ‘Kylo Ren’ come from?” she asked.
“It’s a nickname I gave him in high school,” Poe interjected loudly as he entered the kitchen. He pulled Rey into a big hug as a greeting. “It kind of just stuck after that.”
She saw Kylo roll his eyes at him as Poe released her.
“Where’s Han?” he asked. “Already watching the game?”
“He’s in the living room,” Leia answered.
Poe grabbed a beer from the ice bucket on the counter and promptly exited the kitchen, presumably to join Han.
“So Rey, you work at the ski school with Luke, I hear?” Leia asked, shuffling some plates of hors d'oeuvres around the counter.
“Yes,” she said. “It’s my second season.”
“He says you’re a very good instructor.”
“You know him?”
Leia laughed good-naturedly.
“He’s my brother,” she responded. “He’s around here somewhere, or maybe he took his dog for a walk.”
Rey turned around to frown at Kylo. Why didn’t he tell her stuff like that? This whole time she’d thought his real name was Kylo. She’d only learned of his parents a few weeks ago, and apparently he’d declined to tell her that her direct supervisor was his uncle. Did she even know him at all?
Kylo at least had the sense to look a bit ashamed. It was hard for her to stay angry at him. She’d never had the luxury of having family problems, but from what she heard about them they were not to be taken likely. She’d let him get off easy.
Thunderous footsteps made their way down the hall, followed by the appearance of someone Rey actually knew in the kitchen.
“Chewie!” she exclaimed happily, greeting one of her favorite customers from the bakery.
“Rey!” he said, bringing her into a bear hug. Chewie was always warm and gave amazing hugs. He had a twisted sense of humor that amused the bakery employees to no end.
She was relieved to see a familiar face.
“Ben hasn’t scared you away yet, has he?” Chewie asked, giving Kylo a walloping pat on the back.
“Uncle Chewie…” he said, groaning.
“He’s your uncle too?!” Rey asked angrily. Was he related to the whole town?
“He’s not my actual uncle,” he said, shrugging Chewie’s hand off of his shoulder. “He just acts like one.”
“Welcome to our gathering, Rey,” Chewie said, smiling at her. “It’s nice to have little Ben invite a friend for once.”
“Ben would you be a dear and grab more beer from the cellar, please?” Leia asked as another man walked into the kitchen with a bowl of something. “And tell your father to get the first batch of the meat onto the grill.”
Rey’s hand reached out with a mind of its own to grab Kylo’s hand as he began to turn around. Was he just going to leave her alone with all of these people? Her social anxiety was kicking in. She looked at him with what she was sure was probably a pathetic expression. Kylo squeezed her hand in return, gesturing toward the doorway with his head, eyes wide.
“I’ll help him,” Rey said, following his lead.
Kylo tugged her away before anyone could order otherwise. She let go of his hand as soon as they entered the hallway.
“Sorry about all that,” he said, leading the way to a staircase.
“No, I’m enjoying it! Everyone is so nice. It’s just a lot of people,” she responded.
“It is,” he agreed. “My mother is way more social than me or Han. She invited half the neighborhood.”
“I like her,” Rey smiled.
Kylo looked back at her with a mysterious smile of his own before starting down the staircase to what Rey assumed was the cellar. He flicked a switch on at the bottom that illuminated the unfinished space with a single light bulb. He grabbed a few six packs which he handed to Rey before stacking two cases and picking them up himself. Rey led them back up the stairs, trying very hard not to imagine the way her ass was perfectly in Kylo’s eyeline. Hopefully her sweater was doing a reasonable job at covering it. Or not, she decided on second thought, trying to subtly sway it without looking too weird or purposeful.
They packed the ice buckets and coolers in the kitchen with beer before Kylo led her toward another side of the house to summon Han.
The living room was full of men, all sitting or standing with a view of the TV, where the NFL game was playing. Rey knew Poe, and of course Chewie, who had migrated there from the kitchen, but didn’t recognize many others.
“Dad,” Kylo said.
“Just a minute,” the man in the largest arm chair said, keeping his eyes glued to the television.
“Mom wants you to start up the grill.”
“I’ll start it on the next commercial break,” he said, still focused on the game.
“Ok, just know that you’ll have to endure Mom’s wrath alone. I’ve done my job,” Kylo responded, raising his hands in the air in a gesture of surrender.
Rey laughed, amused by the interaction between father and son.
At the sound of her laughter, Han’s head finally turned toward them.
“Is this Rey?” he asked, standing. All of the other men groaned when he walked in front of the TV as he approached them.
“Yup,” Kylo said, introducing them. “Rey, my dad Han. Dad, Rey.”
“It’s so nice to meet you,” Rey said earnestly, “I can’t thank you enough for helping me out with my car last week.”
“It was my pleasure, kid,” Han said, shaking her hand. “My guy I sent out there said that it was a real mix-and-match under the hood – did you do that all yourself?
“Yeah,” Rey said somewhat proudly, “I pretty much scrapped the whole car together out of a junkyard. Unfortunately, none of the tools or anything were mine, so since I moved up here I haven’t really been able to fix anything on it.”
She saw Kylo’s eyebrows raise in surprise.
“No kidding,” Han said appreciatively. “If you ever need a second job, we can always use more hands at the shop.”
“Really?” Rey asked. “That would be great! I don’t really have the money up front to pay you for the fuel pump and the battery, but if I could work off the debt…”
“No, no, no,” Han said. “You don’t owe me a cent for that. Ben’s friends don’t pay.”
“But I’ll feel really bad if…”
“I won’t take your money, kid. End of story. Putting up with Ben here is payment enough,” he said, lightly punching Kylo on the arm. Kylo rolled his eyes, making him look exceptionally like a teenager. Rey had to smirk to avoid giggling at him.
“That’s very nice of you,” she finally conceded. “And thanks for having me over today. I’ve never celebrated American Thanksgiving before.”
“You’re in luck!” Han said happily, shaking Kylo by the shoulders. “This guy started the brine on the turkey last night. We’ll have all the normal Thanksgiving fixin’s plus a whole lot of grilled stuff. Speaking of which, I better get that started before Her Royal Highness comes out here and kills me.”
“Do you need any help?” she asked.
Kylo shook his head violently from behind Han’s shoulder.
“Well, I could always–”
“Sorry, dad,” Kylo said suddenly, stepping out from behind him and grabbing Rey’s hand. “We’ve got other stuff to get ready.”
He turned back toward the crowd in front of the TV.
“Poe, we need your help,” he said.
“Righto, Ren,” Poe responded, popping up.
“Don’t cause your Mom too much trouble,” Han yelled at them as Kylo led Rey and Poe out of the living room. They quickly darted from room to room, Kylo still grasping Rey’s hand. Once they were in an unoccupied room, he dropped her hand, sighing in relief.
“That was a close one,” Kylo said.
“Tip number one,” Poe said to Rey, looking around as if to make sure they were alone, “never ever offer to help Han with grilling. He’ll ask you to watch it for a minute, but he won’t return, leaving you stuck on the grill for the rest of the night.”
Rey laughed at the serious expressions on her friends’ faces.
“Noted,” she said. “Anything else I should know?” she joked.
“Number two,” Kylo said seriously, “don’t play my parents’ friend Lando in cards, he’s a dirty cheater.”
“Good thing I don’t know any card games,” she reminded him.
“Number three,” Poe added, “never ask Mr. Threepio an open ended question. It should be illegal to be as boring as he is, and he’ll talk your ear off.”
“How about I just hang out with you guys and you can keep me in line?” Rey suggested.
The guys looked at each other for a moment, as if they hadn’t thought about that as an option before.
“Fine by me,” Poe said. “But you may want to stick with Kylo so he has someone to keep him company. I actually enjoy talking to other people.”
Kylo scowled at him. At this point, Rey wouldn’t put it past him to stick his tongue out. It seemed being in his parents’ home was reverting both of the guys back to being teenagers.
“How about I give you a tour of the rest of the place,” Kylo suggested, turning back to Rey.
“I’d love that.”
“I’ll be in the kitchen,” Poe said. “I think Leia is letting people dig into the appetizers soon and I heard Ms. Holdo is coming – I love driving that lady crazy.”
Kylo chuckled as Poe strode out of the room. Rey liked seeing the way the corners of his eyes crinkled up with he laughed or smiled. Was it really so bad to appreciate his good looks?
He looked back at her with a renewed smile.
“Let’s go upstairs,” he said, pointing to a nearby staircase. “I’ve got something I think you’ll like.”
Rey tried not to stare at his rear end as they ascended. At the top of the staircase, Kylo led them down a short passageway to a beautiful, antique looking wooden door. He looked back at her again before turning the handle and swinging it open, waving Rey inside.
Behind the doorway was perhaps the most quaint and perfect library Rey had never seen. The room wasn’t large, but every inch of the walls was covered in bookcases, floor to ceiling, filled to the brim with multi-colored novels, sets of encyclopedias, and even children’s books.
“Wow,” she whispered.
“I know you said you like quiet spaces,” Kylo said softly behind her. “This was always my favorite quiet place growing up.”
Rey marveled at the ornate cases and trim work, the well-worn jewel-toned rug, the picturesque window overlooking the front yard. It smelled like old books and pine, and somehow felt warmer than the rest of the house. She walked around the circumference of the room, running her fingers along the spines of hundreds of books she was dying to read.
“It’s beautiful,” she choked, fighting back tears. She imagined a young Kylo, curled up in one of the armchairs in the corner of the room, nose buried in a book. She would have killed for a childhood like his. She turned around to find him, and was surprised to find him looking at her with a tender expression that she couldn’t read.
“What’s wrong?” she asked quietly.
Kylo shook his head, expression fading.
“Nothing,” he said.
“This room is amazing,” she said, letting her eyes wander to the ceiling, where intricate wood patterns curved and swirled into a decorative floral masterpiece.
“I’m glad you like it,” Kylo said, stepping toward her.
She closed her eyes for a moment, taking in the strong, comforting scent and feeling the warmth of the sunlight streaming through the window. Yes, she liked this room.
She opened her eyes to find Kylo in front of her, watching her. He was so close that she could see the fine texture of the fabric of his shirt, the short stubble of his beard, his long eyelashes.
“Where to next?” she asked, trying to diffuse the situation before she did something stupid like touch him.
He blinked a few times before clearing his throat.
“There’s a balcony around the corner that has a nice view of the neighborhood,” he suggested.
Neither moved for a moment, seemingly caught in some sort of magnetic push and pull between them. Neither wanted to break the fragile air around them.
She was so close, glowing in the sunlight illuminating the library. Kylo could smell her, could see individual threads of wool in her sweater. All he wanted to do was wrap her in his arms and kiss her for the rest of the day.
But that was absurd. They were only recently friends, and Rey had shown absolutely no interest in being anything else. But she looked so soft in the gentle lighting, so at home in the library. It was clear she felt the same way about it as she did. They were the same in so many ways, but wildly different. She made him a better person, he thought. She was beautiful, and she liked him for who he was. It was so tempting not to kiss her.
“Where to next?” she asked suddenly, breaking him out of his reverie.
“There’s a balcony around the corner that has a nice view of the neighborhood,” he said, trying not to betray any feeling other than hospitality.
“Sounds lovely,” she said.
Yes, you are, he thought. They stood still for a minute, Kylo not willing to pull himself away quite yet. After a moment, he realized he was probably intruding on her space, and reluctantly stepped away.
“It’s just this way,” he said, turning back toward the door and out into the hallway. He listened to her footsteps falling behind his as he led them toward the French doors that opened up onto the balcony.
“We don’t have to go out,” he said, “it’s pretty cold out.”
“I want to,” Rey said determinedly, opening the doors and stepping out into the weather.
Kylo followed her, suppressing a chill at the frosty temperature. They stood at the railing, looking out over the neighborhood, an advantage of a two-story house in an area full of one-story ranches. The wind nipped at Kylo’s ears, and the sweat he’d garnered from chopping wood was freezing viciously on his neck.
“You aren’t cold?” he asked Rey, shocked at her perfectly comfortable posture.
“It makes me feel alive,” she said cryptically, sweeping her gaze across the rooftops in front of them.
“Hey, you two!” Kylo heard shouted from down below.
Han had the grill set up in the front yard, just beside the porch. Upon listening more closely, Kylo could hear the familiar hum of the radio Han used to listen to the football game while he grilled.
“I thought you were too busy to help with the grilling!” he yelled up at them, waving around a metal spatula.
“We are!” Kylo shouted back, grinning. “I’m giving Rey a tour!”
“Isn’t it a little cold for a romantic tryst on the balcony?” he yelled.
Kylo should have known Han wouldn’t be able to keep his mouth shut.
He heard Rey snort from beside him. Clearly, she thought the joke was funny, and not at all embarassing due to potential feelings that might exist. Thank god.
“Ok, ok,” he said to Rey, “let’s head inside.”
Rey smiled at him before walking back through the double doors and into the house. It was such a captivating image, her strolling through his parents’ house. He could easily picture her as part of their family. His family was known for taking in anyone and everyone in need of a place to belong, and Kylo so desperately wished she would want to belong with them, with him. When he’d first met her a year ago, he’d thought she was cute. Now, he liked everything about her – her laugh, her weird interest in jellyfish (apparently she watched a lot of Planet Earth), the way she worked with the kids on the ski slope, how she looked bundled up in a blanket in their hut.
It was torture to be too chicken to do anything about it. He didn’t really have any other friends besides Poe, and he didn’t want to ruin one that had become so good so quickly. He’d settle for friendship with her over nothing at all. As they passed the second floor fireplace, he imagined them sitting in front of it, his arms wrapped around her as she settled her back into his chest. He’d be able to smell her hair, to kiss the side of her neck as they warmed themselves by the fire.
Instead, he led her back down the stairs to rejoin the party. There were more people than ever, and the thought of having to go through the rounds of greeting everyone was daunting. They’d ask the same questions they always did – was Snoke giving Kylo any more trouble? did he have a girlfriend? was he going to take over Han’s shop when he retired? He really didn’t know how to answer any of these.
Before they exposed themselves to the masses, Rey tapped his arm to get his attention.
“Thanks,” she said quietly, reaching her hand up to pat his shoulder. “Thanks for showing me around.”
“No problem,” he said, resisting the urge to grab her hand from her shoulder and kiss her knuckles.
Much to his surprise, her hand glided up his shoulder to his neck, where she gently squeezed, her fingers curling into a lock of his hair. He shivered, and he knew she felt it.
The moment was over before he could process it – she withdrew her hand and turned toward the kitchen, looking back at him to make sure he was following. He’d follow her anywhere.
So, it turns out there will be three parts to the Thanksgiving chapters! It ended up being really long, so there will be one more chapter dedicated to the party.
Thanks for all the kind support, btw. I'm having fun!
Chapter 11: Thanksgiving, Part III
Part III of the Thanksgiving trilogy, in which our snow bunnies watch football, have dinner, and get some alone time.
Rey walked toward the kitchen with Kylo close behind. She didn’t know what to do with the moments that had passed between them. It was different at work – they were with Poe, or they were wearing their thick layers, or chatting with one another while packing up their lockers. Here, in his parents’ house, everything was more real, more intimate. He couldn’t hide anything about himself here, and Rey savored every new morsel of him she was able to discover. She couldn’t deny the pull she felt toward him, the desire to cling to his side and join his perfectly imperfect family.
Something was there between them, she knew it. The way he looked at her in the library, the way he melted under her touch when she stroked his neck – those had to mean something . She’d never seen him act that way with anyone else – even the ski patrol girls she saw ogling him from across the staff meeting earlier that week, when for once he’d taken off his beanie and sat closer to the front of the room next to Rey.
She just needed a sign from him. Something that told her that she wasn’t alone in her confused state of feelings. The feeling of wanting a forever-type of friendship with him, but also like she wanted to lie beneath him as he had his way with her, whispering sweet nothings into her ear. She’d been hurt so many times before that she was terrified of making the first move, of making herself vulnerable before him. She wouldn’t be satisfied with a purely physical relationship with him, she liked him too much.
She looked back at him, still appreciative of the way his flannel fit him snugly in the chest and the way his hair flowed freely like spun silk around his face. He gave her a grin, which seemed to melt yet another sharp, icy shard that guarded her heart. She reluctantly realized that he might just eventually break them all down.
As they entered the kitchen, the mouth-watering scents of the food being served were now irresistibly pulling at Rey’s nose. Leia apparently had no concerns about guests spoiling their appetite with hors d'oeuvres, as mini quiches and tostadas and chips and dip were flying left and right across the kitchen to the various guests. Poe was standing in a corner of the room, holding a small plate with a comically tall stack of food while talking to a woman with bright lilac hair.
There were a remarkable amount of people packed into the small kitchen. Apparently, it must have been halftime of the football game, as the men that had previously been glued to the TV were now loading little plates up with snacks. Rey felt Kylo’s reassuring hand on her back, guiding her toward an empty end of the kitchen island to find plates. After helping herself to a few bits and bobs, she looked around to see Kylo pulling them two beers out of a cooler and gesturing with his head back toward the hallway.
“So,” he said, once they could actually hear each other. “Did you want to watch the game or something? We might be able to get seats since everyone is in the kitchen at the moment.”
“Sure,” she said. “You’ll have to explain football to me though.”
“I can do that,” he said brightly. “Although Han might insist on taking over if he ever comes back inside from grilling.”
“Should we go out there and keep him company?”
“Nah, I saw Chewie and Lando out there with him when we came downstairs. He’s fine.”
He led her to a couch in the middle of the room. The thought of being surrounded by strangers, however, led her to suggest an alternative.
“Maybe we can sit there?” she asked, pointing to a smaller sofa on the side of the room. There was only room for two, so she wouldn’t have to feel anxious about who sat next to her. She was familiar with Kylo’s touch. “So we take up less room?”
Kylo paused to look at the couch in question, but shrugged his shoulders in agreement as he walked over and took a seat. Before Rey even sat all the way down, she realized her mistake. It was a bit… too cozy. The small width of the loveseat pushed the sides of their thighs together. And not just in a ‘barely grazing’ type of way. In a ‘I can feel your heartbeat through your skin’ type of way – pushed together with no mercy. She blushed, absolutely positive that Kylo would think she’d done it on purpose. Well, she didn’t mind the contact, but it certainly hadn’t been her intention. She didn’t need some small couch to express how she felt about him. Then again, maybe she did, since she had yet to make a move herself.
She felt Kylo shift next to her, as if trying to get more room away from her. She decided her only saving grace at this point would be to use humor as a defence mechanism.
“Geez, Ren,” she said, “maybe you don’t need any more Thanksgiving food after all,” she added, hipchecking him to imply that his ass was big enough as it was.
“Well you’re the one that’s taking up three quarters of this thing,” he joked back, thankfully falling for her teasing as a way to prevent any sort of tension.
At that, a large, slobbery dog came barrelling into the room.
“No!” Kylo said as the dog attempted to jump up onto him, nearly knocking over his plate of food. “I wasn’t talking to you, R2.”
Rey laughed as Kylo rather ungracefully set down his plate and beer on a nearby table before awkwardly petting the dog desperate for his attention. The dog appeared to be some sort of mutt, maybe a Husky mixed with some other type of large canine. It had a bright blue collar around its neck that read ‘R2D2’. What a weird name for a pet.
“R2!” she heard from just outside of the living room. “Down!”
The dog happily bounced off of Kylo’s lap and toward the doorway, where Luke suddenly appeared.
“Luke!” Rey said cheerfully, elated to see her mentor outside of work. She easily had the best supervisor at the ski hill. He was an excellent instructor himself, and set a great example for his employees.
“Hi Rey,” he responded with a kind smile. “I heard you might be coming today.”
“I had no idea you were Kylo’s uncle,” she said, taking the opportunity to nudge Kylo’s knee with her own disapprovingly.
“He’s embarrassed of me,” Luke fake-whispered conspiratorially, rubbing R2’s ears.
Rey peeked over just to get a glimpse of Kylo’s annoyed expression. It was so easy to poke fun at him with his family.
“Well it seems like I know all of his secrets now,” she said, looking back at Luke. “He and Poe gave me suggestions for navigating the folks at this party.”
“Did they tell you not to trust Lando?” he asked.
“That guy’s shady, but damn if he isn’t charming,” he said, chuckling.
Other people started piling back into the room to watch the second half of the football game, filling up all the seating and standing room behind the couches. Kylo had to speak pretty loud for Rey to hear him explain the rules. He even leaned toward her ear, so close that she could feel his warm breath on her skin. He’d also thrown an arm behind her on the loveseat to support himself as he angled toward her. Their legs were still touching, and neither made an attempt to separate them. The seating situation and the noise level were the only reasons they were in such close proximity, but Rey was enjoying it anyway. But it was also driving her crazy. Her recent dry spell made even the slightest bit of physical contact electrifying, and it was hard to distinguish her real feelings from her… well… horniness. She normally wasn’t a super touchy person, but she wanted to fit her whole body against Kylo’s, maybe even straddle him right there and then, simply unsatisfied with just their sides.
Rey could see Poe looking at them every so often from across the room where he was chatting with Luke. He was wearing a rather smug expression, and Rey tried to avoid giving anything away by making eye contact with him.
She couldn’t even really pay attention to what Kylo was telling her about football. She was too distracted by how warm he felt against her, and how deep and full his voice was in her ear. She’d occasionally nod or ask an easy follow-up question, but mostly just tried to avoid looking him in the eye or grazing her hand up his thick thigh. How could this not be having the same effect on him? Maybe he really didn’t feel anything for her – their touch meant nothing to him. That was the only thing that made sense. But she had been so sure that there was something there…
At some point, Han appeared back in the room during a commercial break.
“What did I miss?” he asked the crowd, standing to the side by Luke and Poe.
“Lions are down by 10,” someone said, “12 minutes to go in the fourth.”
“Sounds about right,” Han responded with a frown.
He looked over to where Kylo and Rey were sitting, his frown turning into a smile.
“So, Rey,” he said loudly, “has Ben converted you into a football fan yet?”
“He’s trying,” she said vaguely, turning to give him a smile.
Kylo looked between her and the football game with a wry half-grin, and didn’t say anything else.
At the two minute warning, Leia joined them around the TV, patting Han on the back as they watched the Lions lose.
“I’m sorry dear,” she said kindly, “but frankly not surprised.”
“That makes two of us, princess,” Han agreed.
“That’s so cute that your dad calls your mom ‘Princess’,” Rey said quietly to Kylo, leaning toward him.
He blushed for some reason, and shrugged.
“Apparently it’s some inside joke that I don’t really wanna know,” he said.
When the game was over, Leia informed the crowd that dinner would now be served, leaving everyone to slowly file out of the living room and toward the impossibly long table located in the dining room.
Kylo stood up from the small couch and offered Rey a hand. She took it, allowing him to pull her up. Memories of the time he helped her out of the sunken-in chair in the hut came flooding back to her, how she’d been pressed up against him, feeling his chest under her hands. Thankfully, they recreated no such scene this time, releasing hands quickly. She followed him toward the living room, quietly gasping when she saw the spread laid out before them. There were multiple birds, bowls upon bowls of stuffing and potatoes and vegetables, countless boats of gravy, and even her basket of focaccia was tucked in between a dish of cranberry sauce and a pitcher of what looked like spiced wine. She’d never seen so much food in one place, or a family so large. The table easily sat close to 30 people, and Rey suddenly panicked over where to sit.
Thankfully, Kylo’s hand found her back and guided her toward the seat to the right of Chewie, while he took his seat on her other side. She was relieved knowing that she’d be next to friends. Poe also made his way over, sitting next to Kylo. It was a tight squeeze, everyone was smushed together pretty close in order to fit around the table. Rey found herself once again directly subjected to the heat radiating off of Kylo’s body. He was like the sun, and she enjoyed basking in his presence.
The worst part of the day was here. Dinner. It wasn’t the food that was going to be bad – it was the conversation. Since he’d been entertaining Rey throughout the day, people had yet to bother him with all of their prying questions. As an only child to Han and Leia and an only grandchild to the late Padmé and Anakin, all of his family friends were obsessed with knowing every little thing about him. Every holiday was like an interrogation, and he really didn’t want to be interrogated in front of Rey.
Soon after finding their seats, Leia stood from her spot at the head of the table to make her usual toast.
“Welcome, friends, to another American Thanksgiving!” she said cheerfully, raising her glass. “Han and I are so happy to have you all here. We want to welcome some new guests we have this year –…”
“Kel and Lenders Hodrren, who just moved in next door,...”
It was coming.
“And Ben’s… friend… Rey.”
She really had to say it that way. She could have said it without the pauses, or as his and Poe’s friend, or Chewie’s, or even better yet, introduce her as Luke’s employee. But no, she had to say it that way. He was 26 years old and still being embarrassed by his mother.
Kylo could feel every centimeter of his face blush in discomfort as every single pair of eyes looked over at them and raised their eyebrows. He firmly planted his gaze at his mother, trying to avoid eye contact with everyone else. Half of each interrogation was usually about the lack of a significant other in his life, and his mother practically just released the wolves onto him. It was going to be a very long dinner.
“I hope you all enjoy, we’re so thankful to have you all celebrate with us,” Leia finished. “To family!”
“To family!” everyone repeated raising their glasses and clinking with those around them.
Unfortunately, Kylo had to look at Rey to do so. To his surprise, she seemed completely unaffected by Leia’s insinuation. She looked perfectly content, knocking her glass against those of the people within her reach. She even gave him a smile when she knocked his.
After everyone took a drink, the table began to slowly escalate into a loud hum, folks talking, passing dishes back and forth. Kylo loaded up his plate, hoping that if he kept his mouth full he wouldn’t have to answer any questions.
Unfortunately, this plan didn’t work.
“So, Ben,” Amilyn Holdo asked from across the table, “How is work over at the slopes going?”
“Well,” he said, swallowing a bite of mashed potatoes. “It’s been busy, which is good. Normally we don’t really get busy until Christmas.”
“It seems since Mt. Aphax closed down we must be getting all of their normal traffic,” Luke added from a few seats over.
This was good. Keep the conversation about work.
Kylo heard one of Rey’s loud laughs to the left of him – apparently Chewie had said something funny as he was now patting her on the back as she nearly choked on a bite of food. Her face was bright red with amusement and lack of air as she reached for her water, letting it clear her throat.
“That’s ridiculous,” she finally said to Chewie, throwing her head back. Kylo loved when she did that, and watched her as she returned to eating.
“And Rey,” he heard Holdo say, “Poe tells me you work at the mountain too?”
“I do,” she said, “I work for Luke as a ski instructor.”
“She’s one of my best!” Luke offered up.
Bless him. Poe was no help, he was completely engaged with Kaydel Connix who worked for Leia, on the other side of him.
“Is that how you know Ben?” Holdo asked.
Kylo finally broke his gaze away from Rey’s face, realizing he’d been staring.
“Yep,” Rey answered, “that and he always came into the bakery where I worked over the summer.”
“But Ben, you don’t even like dessert,” the lilac-haired witch revealed, peering at him.
“I… uh… mostly bought bread,” he said. “Rey actually brought some bread today – the focaccia, right?” he asked, turning to Rey, trying to change the topic quickly.
“I did,” she said shyly, “it’s the rosemary focaccia in the straw basket.”
“This is superb, Rey!” Luke said, holding up a piece of said bread.
“I’ll be sure to try it when it makes its way down the table,” Holdo said.
That was a close one.
Holdo got distracted by Mr. and Mrs. Ackbar who were sitting to the other side of her, which provided Ben with some time to breath. But not for long.
Mr. Threepio, who was sitting on the other side of Chewie, had to stick his ancient long neck over the table to address him and Rey.
“According to my observations, Ben,” he began, “this is the first female companion you’ve brought to a holiday dinner in over seven years…”
“Yes, that’s very observant of you,” Kylo interrupted him.
“You’re British!” Rey exclaimed suddenly, mouth open in awe as she looked at Mr. Threepio.
“I.. well… yes, I am,” Mr. Threepio stuttered after being distracted from his train of thought.
“Where in England are you from?” Rey asked, excited. She was nearly bouncing in her chair.
“I served as a translator in Her Majesty’s British Armed Forces for nearly four decades. I was based in London,” he said in his usual stuffy manner.
“I’m from London as well!” Rey said. “Brixton.”
Kylo had never asked her about England. Whenever they approached the subject of her past or her family, she seemed to shut down. Kylo didn’t want to pry or make her uncomfortable, so he usually just let it go. Seeing her so excited to encounter another Brit was something else. She was nearly shaking in her chair. And now Kylo knew something new about her.
“Did you know that Brixton is the home of London’s first public library?” Mr. Threepio asked.
“Really?” Rey asked. “Is it the Streatham Library?”
“Indeed,” Mr. Threepio replied, smiling more than Kylo even knew he was capable of.
This was weird. Very few people got along well with Mr. Threepio, he was sort of an acquired taste. So acquired that Kylo himself hadn’t even developed it in his 26 years. But apparently he and Rey were already chummy. That was the effect Rey had on people.
Kylo scanned the table, trying to assess who the next threat would be.
All of a sudden, he felt a hand on his left knee. He hadn’t even realized that he’d been violently bouncing it up and down anxiously until the firm hold stopped him.
He looked over at Rey as she gently squeezed his leg. She wasn’t even looking at him. She was still chatting with Mr. Threepio about London. But she’d noticed his nervousness, and she was comfortable enough with him to soothe him. He wanted to scoop her up out of her chair right then and there, bury his face in her neck, and lead her up to the library to let her comfort him there for the rest of the night.
But a half a plate of food still sat before him, and at least another hour of time at the table. He breathed in through his nose and let out is breath slowly through his mouth, and his leg relaxed. He sadly felt Rey let go of his leg. Thankfully, a minute later she turned back to him, apparently done speaking with Mr. Threepio.
“You alright?” she asked him, eyebrows raising in concern.
“I’m fine,” he answered lowly to her. “Everyone likes to attack me at family dinners, and it makes me uncomfortable.”
“Attack?” she asked, smirking. “Don’t you think that’s a little dramatic?”
“That’s my brand, remember?” he replied, teasing her.
She rolled her eyes while she took another bite of food, but smiled. Finally, the basket of Rey’s bread was passed to Poe, which was then passed to Kylo.
He immediately stuffed a bite in his mouth.
“Damn Rey,” he said with his cheeks full, passing her the basket, “this is good!”
“Why do you sound so surprised?” she asked.
“Not surprised,” he answered, “just missed your bread.”
“You know you can still go to the bakery even though I’m not working there, right?” she asked playfully, taking a piece for herself and passing the basket to Chewie.
“What’s the point?” he asked honestly.
Rey looked flustered, and took a bite of her own instead of answering.
The rest of the dinner passed as expected. Now and then, someone would shout at Kylo from down the table some sort of embarrassing question, which he would either answer or deflect. Poe and his damned impeccable people skills occasionally came to his rescue, and even Luke was helpful once or twice. As usual, his parents were of no help, usually just encouraging people to pester him. The subject of girlfriends and/or Rey came up, but thankfully Rey was usually too engrossed in conversation with Chewie to notice.
After what felt like 10 hours but was really just about 2, people starting standing up and clearing their dishes to the kitchen. Thankfully, dessert was a free-for-all affair – he wouldn’t be stuck at another table trying to avoid conversation.
He joined up with Poe and Rey in the corner of the kitchen, waiting in line for access to dessert.
“I don’t think I could eat another bite,” Rey said, rubbing her stomach.
“Me neither,” Poe said, “but we have to. These pies are too good to turn up.”
Kylo never had that problem. He was never full. He supposed it was because he was so much bigger than everyone else, or that he worked out a lot.
He started taking small slices from every pie available, stacking them on his plate.
He turned around to see Rey staring at him with her cute eyes wide and mouth open.
“What?” he asked.
“How on earth are you still hungry?” she asked.
He shrugged, second guessing his decision. Maybe he shouldn’t eat like a teenager in front of Rey.
“Kylo could eat an elephant and still be hungry,” Poe said, chuckling.
He watched Rey as she looked down at her measly singular slice.
“I wish I could eat more,” she said sadly in a way that made Kylo laugh.
“Why?” he asked.
“So that I can try all the flavors!” she said, eyes sweeping across the kitchen island at all of the pies.
“How about this, you can try a bite of each of my slices,” he offered.
“Deal,” she said, looking determined.
The three of them made their way toward the conservatory which would be colder, but at least have open seats.
On the way, Poe ran into Holdo again, with whom he immediately engaged in conversation.
Kylo and Rey continued on, finding the conservatory quiet and empty.
They both sighed as they settled into the settee.
Rey quickly finished her slice, and started snagging bites off of Kylo’s.
He had to keep himself from laughing as she ate the majority of his plate.
“Ugh!” she exclaimed once she had finished, turning herself to lay down on the settee, bringing her legs to drape over the armrest and her head to rest in Kylo’s lap. “I’m never eating again!”
Kylo tensed up, now very aware of the weight of her head in his lap which was dangerously close to a… concerning area.
“Now who’s being dramatic?” he asked.
“Me,” she answered slowly, closing her eyes. She reminded him of a cat, content to curl up and fall asleep after a meal. He had to admit that he was feeling pretty full himself.
They talked for a while, and Kylo relaxed under her head. Her touch was soothing, even if it was just her head on his lap.
After a while, she stopped responding to his soft questions. He looked down and noticed her lips were slightly parted, and that her breath was slow. She’d fallen asleep.
Trying hard to avoid disturbing her, he reached over to the blanket sitting on the back of the settee and gently laid it over her.
He watched her for a while, her short but dark eyelashes flutter along with her eyelids, her soft-looking lips part and reclose occasionally. After a while, he grabbed a magazine from the end table on his side, and started reading it as he let her rest. He could imagine life like this – spending Sunday afternoons letting Rey nap against him. It saddened him to think it may never happen again. Maybe she’d come to his parents’ house again for a party or a holiday. She mentioned she didn’t have any family, maybe he could be her family. She could lean her head against him whenever she wanted. Kylo thought about their first contact, when he’d accidently grabbed her boob while trying to wake her up in his truck. That seemed so long ago, and the memory almost made him laugh. He’d been mortified at the time, but she’d laughed it off like they were old friends. Now that they were friends, Kylo couldn’t help but imagine what it would be like to really touch her there, with her begging for his hands.
Thankfully, since the conservatory was so much cooler than the rest of the house, they were left in peace and quiet for what must have been hours. Kylo was actually getting sore from sitting for so long, but couldn’t bring himself to wake Rey when she looked so angelic.
Eventually, Kylo heard the door open behind him, and Poe came strolling in.
He raised his eyebrows, looking between him and Rey, and winked at him.
Kylo glared at him, attempting to look indifferent to Rey.
“I’m heading out, man,” Poe whispered. “It’s getting late, pretty much everyone is gone.”
“Ok. See you later,” Kylo answered quietly.
“You going to wake her up?” Poe asked.
“Yeah,” he answered.
“Alright, see you.”
Kylo waved goodbye as Poe left.
Avoiding the chest/shoulder region completely in hopes of avoiding another accidental boob-grab, he stroked the side of Rey’s arm.
“Rey,” he said lowly, trying not to startle her.
“Mm?” she asked, waking up.
All of a sudden, she bolted up, heaving her legs off of the armrest and jumping off of the settee, a wild look in her eyes, breathing hard.
“Sorry,” Kylo said, “I didn’t mean to startle you.”
“Oh…” she said, looking around her, “oh. No, I’m ok. I just don’t like waking up in strange places. My bad. I’m good…”
“You sure?” he asked, not convinced by her spooked expression.
She looked back at him, and her shoulders seemed to relax. A mild smile returned.
“I’m good,” she repeated. “How long was I out?”
“A few hours.”
“A few hours!?” she repeated in a higher pitch. “Why didn’t you wake me?”
“Looked like you could use the rest,” he answered, shrugging.
Rey groaned into her hands. Her hair was messed up from laying on Kylo’s lap, and her sweater was falling off of one shoulder. She looked adorably disheveled.
“Did you want to stay the night?” Kylo asked on instinct.
It took one second to observe her look of surprise before he amended himself.
“In a guest room,” he added. “It’s kind of late.”
“Oh no,” she answered, “thank you, but I better get home. I couldn’t overstay my welcome like that.”
“Your welcome here is unlimited,” he said, standing up.
“I… thank you,” she said quietly as she looked up at him. She folded her arms in front of her. “Thank you, but I’ll get going.”
“Sure,” he answered, disappointed.
He himself was staying the night in his old childhood bedroom as he had promised Han and Leia that he would help clean up in the morning. And although Rey wouldn’t have been staying actually with him, it would have felt like a victory anyway, that she was comfortable enough with his family to stay.
“I need to thank your parents,” she muttered as she scooped up their dessert plates and forks.
He followed her back to the kitchen, where Han and Leia were still chatting with Chewie, Luke, and Lando.
“And where have you two been?” Han asked loudly as they entered.
“In the conservatory,” Kylo answered, begging him with his eyes not to inquire further.
“I fell asleep,” Rey admitted, stacking their plates in the sink.
“Ben bored you that much, huh?” Lando asked, winking at Kylo.
“Oh, no,” Rey said, flustered, “all that delicious food just knocked me right out.”
“Do you want to spend the night, dear?” Leia asked, looking concerned, “you look quite worn out.”
“Oh no, thank you, though,” Rey answered, wringing her hands together. Kylo could tell she was uncomfortable with all the offers. “I better get home. Thank you so much for having me though. Really, this was the best holiday I’ve ever been too.”
Leia looked about ready to cry at that, and Kylo himself felt a little emotional. Had she really not had any family holidays? It seemed cruel that he had so many throughout his life that he hated attending whereas she didn’t have any but seemed to love them.
“Ok, well,” his mom said, looking like she was trying to keep it together, “I’m sending you home with leftovers. No arguments.”
“Wow, thank you!” Rey said, her eyes brightening again.
Kylo had noticed during their lunch breaks in the hut that she always seemed to bring very plain food. He knew she was good at baking, which probably meant she was good at cooking. So why didn’t she eat better? She clearly liked food – she’d tried everything on the table.
He watched Rey chat with Han about her car while Leia loaded up a tupperware container full of leftovers.
“Thanks again for having me,” Rey said genuinely, letting Leia hug her goodbye before she grabbed her jacket off of the hook.
“Anytime,” Han said gruffly, patting her on the back like he did to himself and Poe. “Feel free to stop by whenever, no need to bring Ben, he’ll just dull the mood.”
Rey laughed with him as she turned around to peek at him with her mischievous smile.
“Will do,” she answered.
“I’ll walk you to your car,” he said, gesturing her out of the kitchen.
She waited while he slipped on his boots and opened the front door, exposing them to the chilly nighttime air.
“Your parents are amazing,” she said as they crossed the street toward her car.
“They’re… something,” he answered.
“Oh come on, why don’t you like them?”
“They’re alright… they’re just… they pretend I’m this person I’m not.”
“What kind of person?”
“They still call me Ben even though no one else has called me that since 10th grade, they still think I’m into the same stuff I was as a kid, they don’t respect my privacy, I don’t know… they just… don’t really listen to me.”
“Have you told them this?” Rey asked.
“Not really,” he admitted, hanging his head.
“Well they clearly love you,” she said, opening the back door of her car to unload the container of leftovers. “Maybe you should just try talking to them about it.”
“I guess,” he answered as she shut the door.
She turned around and looked up at him, her cheeks read from the cold air and her eyes bright with intent.
“Kylo,” she said slowly, “thanks for having me. Even if it was Poe’s idea,” she smirked.
“I’m glad you came,” he said honestly, searching her eyes, and her lips.
“Are you working tomorrow?” she asked.
“No,” he answered. “Took the day off, gonna help clean up the house.”
“I’m not working either,” she said. “Do you want any help?”
He didn’t want her to feel obligated to help, she was their guest. But he didn’t want to pass up an opportunity to see her.
“That’s alright, but do you want to meet up for lunch when I’m done?,” he offered as a compromise.
“I’d like that,” she said. “Text me tomorrow.”
Before he could respond, Rey stood up on the tips of her toes, grabbed his head with one hand, and kissed his cheek. She immediately turned around and hopped into her car, not sparing him another look. He took a step back as she pulled away, and watched her car all the way down the road until he couldn’t see it anymore.
He put his fingers up to his cheek, where it was burning from her kiss. He couldn’t help but smile. There was something to them after all.
He turned around toward the house only to find Han, Leia, Chewie, Lando, and Luke all looking through one of the front windows, staring at him and giving him various versions of thumbs-ups.
He groaned, praying that Rey hadn’t seen them.
I know it's a slow burn, y'all. It was right there in the tags.
Chapter 12: Morning After
It had taken every last ounce of Rey’s courage to reach up and kiss Kylo’s cheek. The next morning, she lay in bed, stressing over whether she’d done the right thing. She knew some people saw that type of gesture as a friendly exchange one could even perform on a mere acquaintance. But for someone like her, who grew up starved for any sort of touch, and associated most forms of physical contact with violence, it was a big deal.
She’d wanted to know how he’d respond to it, but she’d completely wimped out and ran away as soon as she did it, and didn’t even get to see any sort of reaction on his part. She knew he wasn’t much of a toucher himself, but she’d basically primed him all evening with little bits of contact here and there – on his neck, his knee, even resting her head on his lap. And he seemed to be comfortable with all of them, welcoming, even. She thought she was being so obvious, but he didn’t make any sort of move at all as they said goodbye. So she’d taken things into her own hands and pecked his cheek rather ungracefully and ran away.
She supposed she would have to wait until lunch to try to see how he felt toward her. She stretched her arms out in front of her and tensed her legs, wiggling her toes. Once satisfied with the light stretching, she finally pulled herself out of bed. She had a number of things she wanted to get done before meeting up with Kylo for lunch.
The first thing was to tune up her skis. She tried to address any base repairs every few weeks or so, whenever she got a day off. Skis were expensive, so she took extremely good care of hers so that they would last as long as possible. She went downstairs and grabbed her skis from where she’d propped them up by the front door and took them to her makeshift workshop in a spare room. It was pretty scarcely supplied, but it had the necessities. She cleaned the bases and scraped off the little wax that remained from her pre-season tune up before filling in the small gouges with Ptex. While she waited for it to cure and cool she sorted some screws and nails she’d scavenged from the local junkyard into their sizes in nice little bins she’d constructed from some scrap wood she’d found out behind the locker room last season. One day, she’d fill out her workshop with all the tools and parts her heart desired. For now, it was limited to stuff she could find, as she couldn’t really afford that type of luxury.
She used her steel scraper to nip off the extra bits of Ptex and smooth down the filling. Thankfully, her edges were in pretty good shape. She’d settle with just a wax job for now. The heat from her clothing iron was nice as she melted the wax over her bases, and working with her hands was always therapeutic for her. She waxed and repaired Finn’s skis for free just for fun. He always tried to pay her, but she couldn’t accept his money. The sudden realization of the parallel of Han’s refusal of her money for her car came crashing down like a ton of bricks. Oh. In the same way she enjoyed helping her friends, maybe Han enjoyed helping his son’s friends. She supposed she could understand that.
Speaking of Kylo, as soon as she finished scraping off the excess wax, she ran upstairs to check her phone. She tended to lose track of time in the workshop. Thankfully, it was still only just after 10am. Kylo hadn’t mentioned a specific time, but she figured by the time he woke up after the admittedly gluttonous day they’d had and helped his parents’ clean up their massive house, it would probably be a late lunch. She put her phone in her pajamas pocket anyway. She didn’t want to miss his text.
She then needed to decide on which other chores to accomplish that morning. Maybe she should start peeling the old, degrading wallpaper out of the downstairs bathroom.
With a ding, her phone notified her of an incoming text message. She nearly ripped her pants pocket with how quickly she pulled her phone out of it.
It was just Finn. He was probably on break at work.
how was it at the mayor’s house??
sry, i’m on break and really bored lol
it was so nice! it was a huge party!
but u hate those...
it wasn’t so bad… i ended up knowing a few people there and Kylo’s parents were really nice
yeah… i’m sure it was kylo’s PARENTS that you enjoyed
what is that supposed to mean?
just seems like ur really into kylo lately...
idk… i’ve just been hanging out with him and poe dameron a lot i guess
OH shit that reminds me
Poe talked to me this morning out of the blue
really? what did he say?
he asked if u were working today. i told him u weren’t. he wanted to talk to u but doesn’t have your number. i gave it to him since u told me you’ve hung out with him hope that’s ok
yeah, that’s fine
ok good. btw did i mention that he’s even more attractive up close?
do you like him?!?
i mean… i don’t NOT like him…
do u think he’s straight? they always are...
i don’t know… i could ask him for you?
no! don’t ask him like…. FOR ME….. just see if u can find out like casually lol
lol will do. you know i could have us all hang out… you could just ask him yourself?
ur one to talk!
girl have u even made a move on crylo yet
first of all, don’t call him that. second, what makes u think i even like him?
rey it’s so obvious it hurts
no its not!!!
yes it is
well tell that to Kylo bc he seems to have no idea
OMG SO U DO LIKE HIM!!!!!?!?!
wait what do u mean he has no idea?!?!
OMG did u make a move?!?!!?
i….. tried… i guess
what do u mean u TRIED
idk… idk what the fuck im doing honestly. i guess like… i touched him a lot? but he’s my friend so i didnt want it to be weird...
Rey. you me and rose need to have a talk
Rey sighed loudly. This was exactly why she shouldn’t have told him. Now they would have to have a ‘discussion’ about it. It wasn’t like she didn't know how to get guys! She did! It had just been a while! And she’d never tried to seduce (for lack of a better word) a friend before. Mostly just acquaintances or guys she met at a bar. For pete’s sake, she wasn’t shy!
Another message popped up from him before she could respond.
break’s over. gtg. we will discuss this later!
fine. have a good rest of your day
She sighed as she put her phone back in her pocket. She needed to do… something. She was a 20-year-old woman with a crush on her friend and desperately horny. She needed to bang him. Maybe he’d want to, maybe it wouldn’t make things weird between them. Past Rey would have found this decision easy, but Present Rey was a little more patient, and wanted to preserve the few friendships she had. It was all very confusing.
Kylo was pretty groggy when he woke up. A long day of eating and drinking will do that to a person. He looked around his childhood room for a few moments as he blinked his eyes awake. It was always weird staying at his parents’ house, it brought up a lot of memories. So many, in fact, that it took him a full minute before he recalled all the events from the previous day.
He’d spent all day with Rey, and she’d kissed him on the cheek goodbye. He was so fucking screwed. He liked her so fucking much. He groaned into his hands and somewhat ungracefully rolled out of bed. He needed to get a move on with cleaning so that he wouldn’t be late taking Rey to lunch.
He shuffled down the stairs, still shaking off the effects of sleep. Normally he worked out in the mornings to boost his energy, but he’d have to settle for cleaning instead. Maybe he’d split some more firewood for his parents too.
He stumbled into the kitchen where his mom, dad, and Luke were sitting around the island with mugs of coffee, looking at him in amusement.
“Good morning, sleeping beauty,” Han snickered.
“Would you put a shirt on when you come downstairs, Benjamin?” his mother nagged.
“Morning,” he grumbled in response, pouring himself a steaming cup of coffee, inhaling the scent strongly.
“Did you have sweet dreams?” Luke asked, causing Han to choke on a sip of coffee and Leia to cover her mouth with her hand.
“I thought maybe you’d dreamt of a particular brunette we all know.”
Kylo sighed, closing his eyes. He knew he wouldn’t be able to get away with anything.
“It’s all right, honey,” his mom said, “we all like her. I think you’ve finally found a girlfriend we all approve of.”
“She’s not my girlfriend,” Kylo grunted, staring at the granite countertop.
“Oh please,” Leia said, rolling her eyes in her infamous way.
“You two were all over each other,” added Han.
“Can we not talk about this?”
“We’re just saying,” Luke said, piercing him with his blue eyes, “you two seem like a good pair.”
“She’s sort of out of my league,” Kylo responded honestly.
“Obviously,” Han said, hiding his sneer behind his mug before taking a sip.
Kylo frowned at him.
“But honey, she seems to like you. Don’t go ruining it with an attitude like that,” Leia suggested.
“We’ll see,” he answered vaguely. “Didn’t you want me to help clean up this morning?”
“In a rush?” Han asked, raising his eyebrows. “Got a hot date later?”
Kylo didn’t dignify him an answer, instead opening the fridge to find some Thanksgiving leftovers to eat for breakfast.
Chapter 13: Café Maz
Rey and Kylo go to lunch.
Kylo picked Rey up for lunch around 1pm. He had insisted that he drive them both, still untrusting of her old car. It had also snowed overnight, making his SUV the smarter choice in general. She stepped out of her house looking naturally gorgeous – her eyes glowing in the frigid weather and lips perfectly pink. Something in Kylo’s throat always seemed to catch every time he saw her. He felt like the Grinch, only instead of Christmas spirit making his usually cold heart grow, it was Rey.
“Hi,” she said cheerfully as she climbed into his passenger seat.
“Hey,” he responded, “hungry?”
“Where do you want to go?” he asked.
“Hmm…” she said, adorably furrowing her brows and tapping her chin in thought. “How about Maz’s?”
Of course she would choose the one place he would want to avoid. Maz Kanata was his parents’ friend who knew everything about everybody, and wasn’t afraid to speak her mind. She hadn’t been at American Thanksgiving – apparently she’d been entertaining friends from out of town, which wasn’t unusual for her. Her house and her café were practically free boarding houses for whomever came through.
But he couldn’t say no to Rey.
“Sure,” he said instead, hoping that Maz herself wouldn’t be in.
“I just love Maz,” Rey added. “She gave me a ton of advice when I first moved here.”
“That sounds like her,” he responded. “She’ll give you advice whether you want it or not.”
“A friend of yours?” she asked playfully with a grin.
“Another friend of my parents,” he admitted.
“Wow, you must know the whole town!”
“You have no idea…” he said as he turned out of her neighborhood.
They chatted happily about people they both knew in the town as Kylo drove them toward Café Maz. He found it hard to keep his eyes on the road – he didn’t want to miss any of her expressions or the way her eyes lit up. She was wearing tight jeans, and he had to resist the urge to slip his hand on the inside of her thigh and rest it there. It felt like it should be the most natural thing in the world, but it seemed salacious with someone like Rey. He couldn’t help but breathe her scent deeply as it slowly filled his car. She smelled lovely, like clean soap and wood shavings and a hint of vanilla – it was like her aroma was personally designed for him. He even felt protective of her in his car, like he was responsible for her safety and was obligated to take care of her. In reality, he knew Rey would be too independent and obstinate to let him think that way.
When they pulled into the café parking lot, Rey jumped out, smiling at him from across the hood as he made his way around the car. Due to the snowfall, there was a layer of snow on a sign near their parking spot. She drew a heart on it with her finger, stepping back to admire her work. Kylo wondered if she was in a loving mood.
“Shall we?” he asked, gesturing toward the café.
“I hope Maz is in,” she answered as she stepped in front of him and toward the front door.
She opened the door before Kylo got a chance to open it for her, and they were immediately hit with warmth and a delightful smell of food – savory and spicy aromas lofting from the kitchen.
After hanging their coats on the rack, a teenage hostess led them to a booth and handed them their menus. Rey didn’t open hers.
“So,” she started, “did everything get cleaned up this morning? I feel bad that I didn’t help at all.”
“It was fine,” he said. “We have the same clean up routine every time, so it goes pretty quickly.”
“So your parents hold a lot of parties?” she asked as a waiter brought them glasses of water.
“They do,” he answered. “By the way, they told me to tell you that you are welcome over anytime, party or not.”
He watched her blush and look down at the table.
“Wouldn’t it be weird if I was there without you?”
“Not really,” he said, “they have people over all the time. Sort of an open door policy.”
“I think I’d be more comfortable if you were there,” she answered lowly, looking back up at him.
Her hazel eyes met his, and Kylo could have sworn he saw a small fire behind them. The corner of his mouth twitched involuntarily, eventually making him smile. Rey looked like she was watching his lips, which suddenly made them dry as a desert, forcing him to wet them with his tongue.
“Ben Solo, Rey!” a wizened voice interrupted them.
A short, graying, wrinkled old Maz Kanata stood beside their booth, carrying a pot of coffee in one hand and a mug in the other.
“Hi Maz!” Rey was the first to offer, smiling sweetly at her.
“I hope I’m not interrupting anything,” Maz said slyly. Kylo knew her too well to believe her.
“Of course not,” Rey answered smoothly. “How are you? I haven’t been in for a while.”
“Oh, you know how it is,” Maz sighed, placing the mug down and pouring coffee into it. She pushed it toward Kylo.
“Here you go, Ben. Rey, I’ll have your tea out in a moment.”
With that, she waddled away.
“Isn’t it incredible that she seems to know exactly what you want?” Rey asked excitedly, gesturing to his coffee mug that he’d immediately began drinking.
“I’ve been drinking black coffee since I was a teenager,” he answered. “She knows I always want it.”
“Well it only took one visit here for her to know what I like,” she rebutted. “I just eat whatever she brings me, it’s like she knows me better than myself.”
“She really is something,” he agreed, just relieved Maz hadn’t tried to embarrass him in front of Rey… yet.
“So what do you normally do on your days off?” Rey asked him, leaning her elbows on the table and resting her head in her hands. She was too adorable to resist, it made Kylo want to lean across the table and kiss her silly.
“This and that,” he said. “Work out, read, help my mom with stuff. Nothing very exciting.”
“You don’t hang out with friends?”
“You know that Poe is basically my only friend,” he said, looking at her questioningly.
“And me,” she answered boldly.
Kylo’s mouth opened to say something, but Maz returned at that very moment with a pot of tea and a mug for Rey.
“PG tips, dear,” she said reaching up to pat Rey on the shoulder.
“Thank you, Maz,” she said, placing her hands on the pot to warm them.
“So what’s going on between the two of you?” Maz asked suddenly, her directness finally making an appearance.
“What do you mean?” Kylo asked, trying to tell Maz to shut up with his eyes.
She wasn’t taking it.
“What I mean, Ben Solo,” she continued, staring deep into his soul through his eyes, “is that you’re only ever around Poe Dameron and never make public appearances with a woman and yet here you are with my sweet young Rey out to lunch at my restaurant.”
Kylo felt like dying and slipping down into his seat and under the table and out of the living world. Thankfully, Rey was always there to save him.
“I only recently became friends with Kylo and Poe,” she answered for him. “I didn’t really get a chance to know them last season but we’ve been hanging out more this year.”
Maz turned away from Kylo to inspect Rey, and then turned back to him.
“I see,” she answered vaguely. “Don’t you lay a finger on my Rey, Solo. If you hurt her, you’ll have to answer to me.”
“Wouldn’t dream of it, Maz,” Kylo was able to muster, gulping nervously. Something about the little old woman genuinely scared him, sometimes even more than Snoke. She knew his whole history, and seemed keen on not letting him forget it.
“Don’t worry Maz,” Rey said laughing, apparently thinking it was all a joke. “He’s a perfect gentleman.”
“Is he now?” Maz asked, eyebrows raising comically high up her large forehead. “Is this true, Ben?”
“I don’t know,” he mumbled, praying that this conversation would end.
Maz hummed for a moment before taking a step back from the table. When had she even gotten that close to them?
“I like whatever is going on here,” she finally said, pointing back and forth between the two of them. With another hum, she turned around and made her way back toward the kitchen.
“So that’s my Aunt Maz,” Kylo said, trying to make light of the situation.
“She seems to really love you,” Rey said, surprisingly.
“What makes you say that?” he asked. If anything, it was like she hated him.
“She clearly cares a lot about you,” Rey said softly, looking over her shoulder to make sure Maz wasn’t still there. “I’d kill to have family that cared about me like that.”
That pit in Kylo’s stomach widened again. He somehow was continuing to find ways to complain about his family in front of Rey, who didn’t have one.
“You can share mine,” he said without thinking.
Rey looked at him for a moment, as if at a loss for words.
“They seem to care about you, too,” he said. “Chewie and Maz and Luke already know and love you, and my parents really liked you yesterday. And they’re pretty judgemental people.”
He watched as Rey’s lips tightened and her shoulders tensed. Did he say the wrong thing again?
“I can’t just intrude on your family like that,” she said after a few moments, quietly.
“You wouldn’t be intruding,” he argued, reaching over to grab one of her hands off of the tea pot and into his own. “Anyone would be lucky to have you in their family.”
Why was he saying all of these things to her? All of her worst fears were laid out on the table – never being part of a family, never being wanted by one. And he was saying all of the things she dreamt about. She knew it was impossible to reclaim her real family, so a chosen family was the next best thing. And the way he was holding her hand was all she ever wanted from someone that loved her.
Her heart sank. She shouldn’t get her hopes up like that. He wasn’t acting any differently after last night, when she’d kissed him goodbye. Kylo didn’t love her, he was just a good friend. Someone who saw that she was upset. Although it broke her heart that that was all it was, she was still grateful he was so kind.
“Thank you,” she said, gently squeezing his hand in return, trying to swallow back tears. She would just have to leave it at that. Anything more would leave her a snivelling mess at the lunch table.
He released her hand, which left it cold and empty, aching for his touch. She brought it under the table, sitting on it to keep it from reaching back toward him.
“So I’m guessing we won’t be needing these menus,” he said from a different place, giving their menus to a passing waiter.
“I’m sure Maz has already placed orders for us,” she answered, trying to drag herself out of the deep moment they’d been in.
“Are you ok?” she heard him ask.
She shook herself slightly to sit up straighter and re-enter reality. She looked up to see him watching her with concern. His big brown eyes were fully attentive, as if they were only ever made to look upon her.
“I’m fine,” she answered after a breath, forcing a smile. “All this family talk can be tough for me,” she added honestly.
“I’m sorry,” he said quickly, leaning forward. “I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable!”
“No, no, it’s not your fault,” she responded urgently. He was too sweet to her. “You’ve been so nice to me. Your whole family has.”
He nodded solemnly, still watching her carefully. She saw him swallow thickly, and wondered what he must think of her.
“What would you like to talk about instead?” he asked with a small smile.
Rey had to pry her gaze away from his lips to answer.
“Uh,” she stammered, “Hux?” was the first thing that came to her mind for some reason.
“Hux?” he asked, a slight snarl threatening to appear.
“Yeah, are you ever going to tell me why he’s your arch nemesis?” she asked playfully, referring to the first night they were on clean up duty together when she’d made fun of him for calling Hux that.
Kylo’s response wasn’t as playful. His big beautiful eyes darkened, and were cast down. She saw his neck clench. This wasn’t the reaction she was hoping for. Perhaps it was more serious than she thought.
“You have to promise not to tell anyone about this,” he started, still looking down. Apparently this was significant.
Rey nodded earnestly before remembering he wasn’t looking at her.
“I won’t,” she promised aloud.
“Back when I was a teenager,” he began, his hands coming together on top of the table, “when I first started working at the mountain, Snoke took notice of me. I guess it was inevitable, being the mayor’s son.”
Rey was confused by the start, but let him continue.
“He wants to expand the resort, but all the land is either protected by law as natural reservations or owned privately. For years he tried the legal route, trying to pass bills that would unprotect the national forest around it so he could buy it. They never even came close to passing. He even offered fairly large sums of money to the nearby homeowners, but none of them would budge.”
Rey thought about the owner, Mr. Snoke. He’d never personally bothered her, but he had always seemed kind of creepy. He rarely engaged with the staff, the managers did all of the work for him. She wondered what he did with his time. Now she was starting to get an idea.
“Since he couldn’t get any public support, he started recruiting various people from around town to side with him. Offered them bribes if they signed petitions, threatened them if they didn’t publicly endorse him.”
Rey was starting to get a bad feeling about where this story was headed.
“He started to… recruit some of his own employees. He threatened to fire me if I didn't help him. Some people went to him willingly, like Hux.”
“What did he make you do?” Rey asked quietly, afraid of the answer.
“Mostly vandalize the private properties, trying to force people to sell. Sometimes he’d have us scare the kids in the neighborhoods nearby or threaten councilmen or bribe real estate agents. Whatever he could get away with that wouldn’t lead directly back to him. Everyone knows, though. They just can’t get any incriminating evidence on him.”
“That’s horrible that he made you do that.”
“It wasn’t just him,” he admitted, still staring at his hands. “I could have done something about it. But he paid me, which helped me move out of my parents’ house, and buy my car. I knew what I was doing was wrong, but I was too self-centered.”
“How did you get out of it?” she asked.
“One day I just couldn’t look my mom in the eye anymore,” he cringed. “Not when she works so hard to make the town a good place to live. That day I told her what I had done and I went to Snoke’s office and told him that I wouldn’t do it anymore.”
“And he didn’t fire you from the resort?”
“He tried,” Kylo said, finally looking up at her with shameful eyes. “But I reminded him that his ski school coordinator is my uncle, my mom is the mayor, and that Han supplies and repairs all his snow groomers, so he’d have a tough time if he fired me. He said he’d smear Leia’s next re-election campaign but I told him that she already knew and had a counterplan if he did. After that, he sort of just gave up, but he’s been treating me like shit ever since.”
“Wow,” Rey said, not sure how to process all of the new information. She felt terrible for him. Not every teenager had been as tough as she was, and Ben had a pretty cushy upbringing, so he must have been easy to corrupt. The man in front of her now, however, was not a spoiled troublemaker. He seemed deeply troubled by his actions, and still seemed to be punishing himself for it.
“So how does this relate to Hux being your arch nemesis?”
“Oh,” he said, with a hint of a chuckle playing at the corner of his mouth. “So he worked for Snoke willingly. When I quit I told him that he should too, but he said he didn’t care and was in it for the money. I told him that I’d already given my mother a list of people that were working for Snoke, and that he was on it, along with myself. He was furious. Apparently he’s already been convicted of a few misdemeanors, so he can’t afford any other charges. And now he’s on the police department watch list thanks to my mom. I’d be pissed at me too, I guess.”
“He deserves it,” Rey said confidently.
“Maybe,” Kylo answered, shrugging his shoulders. “But I can’t do anything about him being a dick, he’ll just tell everyone about the shit I did when I was younger. The only reason he hasn’t already is because he’s scared I’ll try to get my mom to get him arrested or something.”
“That prick,” Rey muttered unbelievingly.
“My thoughts exactly,” he agreed, finally letting a small smile reappear on his face.
“Well I’m glad you came clean and everything,” she said, examining him. She wondered how he would look if he wasn’t still clearly carrying the guilt with him. Would he sit up straight, would he hold his head high? He always seemed so morose, so glum. Had he always been like that, or had everything changed when Snoke broke him?
“You don’t hate me?” he asked, looking concerned.
“No! Why would I hate you?”
“Because I did horrible things,” he answered, looking confused.
“Kylo,” she said fervently, “everyone makes bad choices. It’s how you deal with them and learn from them that matters.”
Lord knew she wasn’t perfect, she’d made plenty of bad choices in her life. Some of them more gruesome and illegal than Kylo’s.
“I don’t deserve you,” he said openly, his voice raw.
Rey didn’t know how to respond to that. How could he think so lowly of himself?
“All right, youngins,” Maz said loudly as she magically appeared next to their table with a tray full of food.
Kylo nearly jumped out of his skin at the interjection, and Rey had to cover her mouth to stifle a giggle.
“Chicken noodle soup and buttered toast for Ben,” she said, placing a bowl and plate and front of him.
“And a burger and tater tots for Rey,” she finished, handing a plate to her.
“Wow, thanks Maz!” she said, suddenly feeling ravenous. It looked perfect.
“You’re welcome. Benjamin – don’t you dare pick around the vegetables.”
“Maz,” he groaned, looking embarrassed. “I haven’t done that since I was a kid.”
“And don’t you start doing it again!” she said, whacking him on the arm with the empty tray and shuffling away.
“So who else knows?” Rey asked once they were alone again, popping a tater tot into her mouth.
“You know… about you and Snoke?”
“Oh,” he answered, looking ashamed again and peering down into his soup bowl. “Pretty much my whole family – my parents, Chewie, Luke, Maz. They look after me. And I guess Hux, and Phasma, a few guys who don’t live here anymore.”
She watched him take a careful sip of his soup – a bite far too delicate for his massive body. It was amusing.
“Isn’t there any way to stop him? How does he keep getting away with it?”
“I think he has some friends in city hall. Well, maybe not ‘friends’, but… more like associates I guess. People looking for a cut from the profits of the resort.”
“Can’t your mom do anything about it?”
“I think she doesn’t want to risk people finding out about what I did,” he said, putting his spoon down. “I’ve told her that I’ll take the full blame and deal with the consequences, but she won’t change her mind.”
Rey nodded, munching on a bite of her burger. She couldn’t imagine doing anything that would harm someone she loved, if she ever loved someone that much.
“I’m sorry for making you talk about this,” she said. She wasn’t sorry for knowing, but she knew it probably wasn’t Kylo’s favorite subject.
“Don’t be,” he answered, grabbing a slice of toast. “I should have told you earlier. I was just afraid you wouldn’t want to hang out with me anymore.”
“You’re stuck with me now, Solo,” she answered, grinning.
His eyes flashed at the use of his real name, and she was afraid she’d crossed some sort of boundary.
“Am I now?” he countered, flashing his teeth at her. She was in dangerous territory.
“I hate to break it to you, Kylo,” she said, “but you’re far from the scariest person I’ve met.”
Kylo bit off a piece of toast, and Rey couldn’t help but watch the way he chewed and swallowed it.
“You keep telling me how tough you are,” he responded, his voice low. “But so far you seem like just a sweet little girl.”
She frowned, throwing a tater tot at his face. He laughed as he picked it up off the table and popped it in his mouth.
“Don’t make me go all Moss Park on your ass.”
“Woah, she bites!” he continued to laugh, gracefully catching most of the tots she pelted at him.
“Don’t come running to me when you need a lock picked or something shoplifted, Crylo Ren,” she said, finally ending the tot attack and taking another bite of her burger.
“What is going on over there?” Maz yelled from across the restaurant.
“Rey is assaulting me with tater tots, Maz!” Kylo shouted while Rey was still chewing.
“You probably deserve it!” she said sternly.
“He does!” Rey squawked from around her bite of food.
“Kids,” she heard Maz mutter as she returned to speaking with another customer.
“It’s ok to feel inferior,” Rey teased, swallowing her food. “I’ve got a larger strength-to-weight ratio, I’m quicker, I’m better with kids…”
“You’re prettier,” Kylo interrupted.
“Don’t make fun of me,” she said, tempted to throw another tot at him.
“I’m not,” he said seriously before raising his mug of coffee to his mouth. She watched his eyes as he drank. He really wasn’t.
“Well I’m certainly not blessed with the Solo-Organa genes,” she said, trying to deflect.
“What, my big nose and messy hair? Yeah, I’m blessed alright.”
“You realize you’re beautiful, right?” she asked.
“Very funny,” he said, arching an eyebrow.
“Do you even see how the girls on staff look at you?”
That caught his attention.
“The girls on staff,” she repeated, “how they stare at you like you’re God’s gift to Earth?”
“That’s not what they’re doing,” he said, frowning. “They’re probably making fun of me or something.”
“You are so blind.”
Kylo opened his mouth, but shut it before saying anything.
“Don’t let this inflate your ego, it’s big enough as it is,” she said, sipping from her tea.
“I… that’s not… I don’t…” he stuttered, looking thoroughly confused.
“Has he apologized for whatever made you throw food at him?” Maz suddenly said, approaching their booth. She always seemed to come over at the right time.
“He called me a ‘sweet little girl’,” Rey said, smirking at him. She knew Maz would give him hell.
“Do you even know Rey?” Maz asked, smacking Kylo upside the head.
“I was just teasing,” he said, putting his hands up in defense. It was funny to see tiny old Maz scare someone as large and intimidating as Kylo.
“Don’t patronize her again,” she said, pointing a wrinkly but authoritative finger at him.
“And don’t call me ma’am. It makes me feel old.”
“But you’re –”
Rey kicked him under the table. She would have thought that after a lifetime of knowing Maz that he would know better than to call her old.
“I think we’re ready for the check, Maz,” she said over him.
“Oh, please. It’s on me. It’s not every day that Ben walks in here with a girl. My treat.”
“But I –”
“I insist. Now scram, you two. You’re taking up valuable table space.”
Rey and Kylo quickly stood up as Maz practically herded them out, grabbing their jackets from the hooks nearby. Rey saw Kylo slip a generous tip on the table, more than enough to cover their meals.
He held the door open for her, and she stepped out into the winter weather. It was snowing lightly, just a few flakes coming down. She followed Kylo over to his car, enjoying the way the snow looked on his dark hair. She watched him shake it off, like she had so many times at work, before he slipped a beanie on. He unlocked the car and grabbed another one from the truck, offering it to Rey.
“It’s cold,” he said simply as she took it from him.
When he turned away to walk to his side of the SUV, she held the beanie up to her face and inhaled. It smelled like him – a bit musky, a bit like fresh earth, maybe a little spicy. She put in on her head, immediately appreciating the warming effect. She climbed into the passenger seat, sad that their lunch had come to an end and that she’d have to go home to an empty house.
“So what now?” Kylo asked as he climbed in, shutting his door.
“What should we do now?” he repeated, looking at her with a peaceful joy she never saw him exude.
“Oh,” she said, surprised but delighted that he didn’t want their time together to end either.
“Do you want to come over?” she asked hurriedly. “I mean… I’ve got some stuff I’m working on you might find interesting… maybe…”
“Sounds great,” he responded, content with the suggestion. Rey watched his hands handle the gear shift and the wheel as he maneuvered them out of the parking lot and onto the road.
Chapter 14: Drone
Rey invites Kylo into her workshop.
Rey felt nervous bringing Kylo into her home, even as impersonal and rundown as her oversized, empty inheritance was. Her privacy was important to her, and she guarded it fiercely. Letting someone into her space was like letting someone into her soul. Despite this, she hadn’t thought twice about inviting Kylo over in the moment. She’d just wanted to spend more time with him, and showing him some of her projects seemed like an easy excuse.
“It’s pretty bare in here,” she qualified before opening her front door, leading him in. “I figured I didn’t want to load it up with stuff if I’m just going to sell it.”
“It’s nice,” Kylo said politely, looking around the dark foyer and empty sitting room on the right.
“Are these all yours?” he asked, pointing to the several pairs of skis lined up near the front door as he took off his coat.
“Oh, no,” she answered, grabbing both their coats and placing them on the sofa in the living room. “I wish. I do tune-ups as a side hustle. Most of these are co-workers’, some are from regulars at the hill. I’m saving up for a motorcycle.”
“A motorcycle?” Kylo asked, looking surprised.
“Don’t you like… need a new car first?” he asked, grinning.
“Yeah, yeah, yeah,” she answered rolling her eyes. “Don’t be so boring.”
“I’m just being practical,” he countered with a teasing smile.
“Are you too practical to see the stuff I’m working on?” she asked, pointing toward her make-shift workshop.
“Definitely not,” he said, genuinely sounding excited.
She led him into her favorite room, where she had her ski tune-up station, and extra benchtop for her small electronics work, and a tarp-covered section of floor that housed her bigger projects. It was the most ‘done’ portion of the house.
“I should be using my time to fix this place up so I can sell it,” she started, “but my mind wanders and I always have ideas for new projects and I can’t help myself.
She flipped a switch, overhead lights flickering on and illuminating her humble work space.
“This is a custom bench I’m making for Mr. Larbec, it’s almost done,” she said, pointing to a nearly completed piece of Adirondack furniture made from vintage skis over on a tarp. “Do you know him?”
“Old dude, funny ears?”
“You’re one to talk about ears.”
He laughed at that, and moved closer to inspect her work.
“This is awesome,” he said, skimming one of the muted pastel blue skis that comprised the back of the bench with his hand. “Han would love something like this. And I’m pretty sure between him and Luke they have enough old skis to cover a house.”
“They should hire me!” she said enthusiastically. “Or maybe I can make something for him in exchange for the work he did on my car. I’d just need to get a hold of the skis without him knowing...”
“How about I hire you to make it, and that way we can give it to him as a Christmas present?” Kylo suggested.
Rey speculated. She could use the money.
“All right, you’ve convinced me,” she announced.
“Well that was hard,” he chuckled under his breath. She chose to ignore him.
“And this over here is a birdhouse I’m making. I was hoping to get it up before winter but with all my other commissions and pre-season tune-ups, I sort of lost track of it,” she explained, showing him a massive bird house she was working on.
“It’s more like a bird mansion,” he commented, kneeling on the ground to get a better look at the two-story abode.
“There’s a giant maple tree out back,” she said, “I figured I’d make a birdhouse that was proportional.”
“How’d you get so good at making all this stuff?”
“Oh,” she said, taken aback by his question. “Well I used to scavenge around in junkyards and stuff. I pretty much had to make anything that I wanted since I didn’t have any money– like toys and stuff. Then one time someone offered to buy something I made, so I just kept going after that. So… I’ve had lots of practice, I guess. Having the right tools helps. I’ve been scouring flea markets and garage sales since I moved here, trying to fill up my bench.”
“I’m positive Han and Chewie have some old stuff from the shop they don’t use anymore. I’ll ask them for it,” he said, still looking at her bird house.
“Oh, no,” she responded quickly, “I couldn’t ask you to do that.”
“They’d love it if you used them,” he said confidently, not missing a beat.
He kept offering her too much. Why would he do that?
“Do you tune snowboards?” he asked suddenly, standing up to look at her. His broad chest was even with her face, his pecs two pillows she wanted rest her head on.
“I… yeah, I can. I’ve only done a few, but it’s the same as skis, really. I just have to find out how the person wants the edges and how much wax they want.”
“I can show you.”
“Oh, you mean for you? You board?”
“I’ve never seen you out…” she said, trying to remember a time she saw him at the mountain when he wasn’t working.
“I don’t do it as often as I should,” he shrugged. “My board has just been sitting in my apartment since last season. Maybe a tune-up would encourage me to get out there.”
“Sure, just bring it by whenever, I can get it done within 24 hours.”
“Thanks, how much do you charge?”
“Kylo, I wouldn’t charge you.”
“What? Why not?”
“I don’t charge friends!”
“So you mean to tell me,” he started with a smirk, “that you gave me shit for having Han help you out with your car, but you do the exact same thing for your friends.”
“You’re impossible,” he muttered, glancing around the room.
“You love it.”
He whipped around at that, something smouldering going off in his eyes.
“Yes,” he answered simply.
“So, um,” she stammered, looking anywhere but him. Over at her bench, over at the bucket of projects she had yet to start. “Can I ask you a favor?”
“Once I tune up your board, can you give me a lesson the next time we both have a day off?”
“What?” he asked, cocking his head adorably to the side.
“I’ve never snowboarded, I figure I should try it at least once.”
“You’ve never tried?”
She glared at him.
“No,” she said more fiercely. “Is that so weird?”
“No, no,” he said, raising his hands in defence. “I was just surprised, you’re just so good at everything. I can definitely take you out.”
“You do realize that I will probably be pretty judgemental of your teaching ability since I’m an instructor, right?” she warned him.
“As long as you don’t make me cry,” he joked.
“I’m not that mean,” she responded, rolling her eyes. “I’ve only had one kid cry and that was because he had separation anxiety from his parents.”
“Sure it was,” he said, playfully elbowing her. “Any reason you can’t get a real instructor on staff to teach you?”
“I’d feel obligated to pay them. And I figured you’d do it for free, since you’re a pushover” she explained, turning toward her workbench.
“You are literally so confusing,” he said from behind her with a merriment in his voice.
She was always weird with money. She refused to accept handouts from strangers or acquaintances, but had no problem scamming people who deserved it or receiving help from true, trusted close friends, which apparently Kylo now was.
“Besides, you already told me you don’t do anything on your days off,” she added, opening the fixed vice grip on her bench to place a warped ski pole in it. Apparently Telon on the ski patrol staff bent it while trying to get to a kid that was stuck in some trees.
“Fair point,” he said from closer behind her. She wondered how close he would get.
“I think my old board I have will probably be too big for you,” he said, reaching around her to pick up a small drone she’d built from some spare fans and motors from an old computer. “But Poe has a board, and you’re similar in height. I’m sure he’d let you borrow it. You’d just have to rent some boots.”
“Sounds doable,” she said, grabbing a hand vice grip from the rack on the wall and getting to work on the pole. It had a thicker wall than she was used to, and she couldn’t bend it back in place with her normal amount of torque. She quickly became frustrated.
She was about to grab her stool to gain some height when Kylo put the drone back on the counter from behind her and lightly placed a hand on her hip. His other hand came to gently take the grips from her. She felt her back brush against his chest as he maneuvered her smoothly out of the way. His hand left her side to come to the ski pole in question. Her large vice grips managed to look tiny in his massive hand, and all it took was a few pulls for him to bend the pole nearly straight again.
As much as part of her wanted to put his strength and brawn to the test by climbing him like a tree, the other part of her needed to defend herself. She would have gotten the pole eventually.
“Show off,” she muttered, taking the vice grips back from him when he turned around.
He had the nerve to look slightly amused. Oh. Maybe he had been trying to show off. He knew her well enough by now to know that she could have done it herself, so maybe he was trying to demonstrate something…
What kind of game was he playing? And should she play along? Or at least give as good as she got? Rey was not accustomed to losing, and she wasn’t going to lose this battle.
Of course Rey would call him out for showing off. He’d basically jumped at the first opportunity to assert his masculinity when he’d become surrounded by her impressive collection of engineering and design projects. He hadn’t been thinking, the instinctual part of him that wanted to flaunt in front of Rey had just taken over.
Kylo now stood empty-handed next to Rey, who was putting the vice grips back on their spot on the wall. He watched her lean over the tabletop, her shirt riding up to expose her skin around her hips, her waist. He wanted so badly to touch her, to wrap his hands around her, feel her smooth skin beneath his fingertips. In a moment, she was leaning back to neutral, and he could have sworn she caught his eyes before he was able to pull them away from her body.
She unfixed the pole from the workbench, placing it back with its partner by the door.
“I see you already discovered my little drone,” she said, picking up the thing he had been looking at when she started on the ski pole.
“That’s a drone?” he asked.
“What did you think it was?” she questioned him, holding up the hodge podge gadget that looked more like a mini toaster without the metal casing than anything.
“That’s what I was trying to figure out,” he answered, now seeing the small fans scattered throughout the device.
“Wanna fly it?” she asked him with a smile.
“Seriously? It flies?”
“Of course it flies,” she said, snorting and whacking him in the arm. “I’d be the worst engineer ever if I built a drone that doesn’t fly.”
So she was a ski instructor, an auto mechanic, a furniture designer, a woodworker, a ski technician, and now apparently an aerospace engineer. Great. He was basically nothing compared to her. He could barely use his smartphone. His only redeeming quality was his extensive knowledge of literature, and some history, having spent most of his childhood in his parents’ library.
She turned back around to reach into a box, pulling out a ridiculous looking controller that was about five times larger than the drone itself. Wires stuck out of every surface of it.
“I know what you’re thinking,” she said, looking between the controller and him with a frown. “The wiring’s a mess… I had so much trouble getting the drone balanced that I haven’t had time to clean up the wiring on the controller yet.”
Kylo laughed, of course she would be upset by the wiring. She was such a perfectionist, it was adorable.
“Trust me,” he said, “that is the last thing I was thinking.”
She looked at him with a slightly confused expression before relenting to his smile. He watched her switch on the drone, then the controller. She started it off slow, gently lifting it off of the counter a few inches. Once she looked satisfied that it was balanced and flying straight, she started zooming it around the room, a look of pure delight on her face. Kylo couldn’t even watch the drone, he was too busy watching her.
“All right, enough fun for me,” she said, landing it smoothly back on the workbench.
She stepped close to him, turning around the controller and placing it in his hands. She stood close in front of him, pointing out the various functions.
“This joystick controls the pitch and the roll,” she said quietly, guiding his right thumb on the controller. “And this one is for the throttle and the yaw,” guiding his left thumb with her own, callused digit.
“I have no idea what you just said” he muttered, thoroughly confused by the flight terms, and completely distracted by her hands on his. He looked down at her, he was so close to her that his breath was disturbing the little baby hairs on her forehead.
“You’ll figure it out,” she said confidently, taking a step back.
“I’m gonna break it,” he said even more confidently.
“That will just give me something to fix,” she said, shrugging.
She was so perfect in her own way, standing in front of him in her ratty grey t-shirt, hair up in those unusual three buns. Something about her sparked a possessive feeling in him, like she was his. It seemed so wrong, feeling something so wicked about someone so pure. But he wanted nothing more than to possess her, and for her to possess him. She already owned him, though she probably didn’t know it. He wanted so badly to tell her, but he didn’t want to scare her off. He knew he could come off intensely. He’d have to be careful, and do something he’d never had to do in the past, something he didn’t even know how to do. Flirt.
Rey spent an hour teaching Kylo how to fly the drone around her house. For someone so manly, he certainly wasn’t good with flying something remotely. His hand-eye coordination seemed limited to macro-tasks, like chopping wood and lifting things. Not so much micro-tasks like operating a remote control. She constantly had to re-explain the controls, guiding his thumbs to the proper joystick and helping him maneuver them up and down.
Eventually he got the hang of it, and even tried chasing her down with her own drone. It usually led to him crashing it into a wall or ceiling. At least he had the courtesy to apologize every time he heard it crunch against a hard surface. The drone survived, but Rey’s self-respect didn’t. She giggled like a little girl, like the women she’d seen in the rom-coms Finn made her watch. She let her hands linger on his hands, on his shoulders, wherever she could grab. She wanted to explore him with her hands, with her own body. After he flew the drone toward her directly enough for it to hit her in the ass, she turned around and wrestled him for the remote. He held it high above his head, leaving Rey to jump for it. Kylo had to hold her tightly around her waist to keep her from climbing him like a jungle gym to get it.
“Ok, ok,” he laughed, finally relinquishing control of it and handing the remote to her. “I can tell I’m probably not going to win this fight.”
“You’re damn right,” she said proudly, still in his arms.
He didn’t let go, and Rey raised her eyes to his. They were dark, pupils dilated. Her lips parted, when did her breathing become heavy? She swallowed so forcefully she could hear it echo. She felt his own heartbeat accelerate against her, near her collarbone. She suddenly felt vulnerable and exposed, the skin of his arm so warm on her through her shirt, his stomach so hard against her body. Isn’t this what she wanted? She wanted him, every part of him mysterious and sexy and something she wanted to sink her claws into.
He leaned down toward her then, letting out a breath he must have been holding. She could feel him tremble slightly from where her hand not holding the controller was on his upper arm.
“It’s ok,” she said softly, not even sure if he could hear her. “I feel it too.”
He furrowed his eyebrows, his face now close enough to feel his breath on her face. He looked at her questioningly, like he was asking something.
Knock knock knock knock.
Chapter 15: Finn
Rey and Kylo are interrupted.
Knock knock knock knock.
Rey nearly jumped out of her skin at the loud knocking at her front door. She’d been so hyperfocused on Kylo and the feeling of him against her that the interruption startled her.
Her jolt against him and their joint surprise made Kylo let go of her, leaving behind the warm imprint of his arm around her back and a ghost pressure of where his chest had been pressed against hers.
Even after taking a step back, his eyes were still soft, still begging her of something. He still looked like he was holding his breath. Rey had never seen him so vulnerable before, so open. She wanted to take him somewhere far away, somewhere he would be safe, somewhere they could just explore each other without any pressure or any hauntings of the past.
Knock knock knock knock.
“I, uh,” she stuttered, placing the drone controller that was still in her hand on the table. “I better get that.”
She couldn’t look at him as she turned away, afraid of the hurt she might see on his face. Although it was only a few paces away, the walk to the front door felt excruciatingly long. Any step taken without Kylo felt like a marathon.
Rey opened the door to find Finn there, it wasn’t uncommon for him to come over to her house after work.
“Hey, you ok?” was the first thing he asked when she opened the door.
Rey did her best to neutralize whatever worrying expression on her face that her friend was seeing.
“Yeah, I’m good. How was work?” she asked, gesturing him inside.
“Shitty tips today. You’d think all those rich white people could spare a few dollars for a brother, but apparently no one taught them how to tip,” he said, dropping his bag on the floor and meandering into her kitchen, filling the kettle like he always did.
Kylo walked in from the workshop, looking more composed than a minute prior, and completely closed off.
“Hello,” he said awkwardly, announcing his presence.
“Oh, hey Kylo,” Finn said, friendly as always. Rey was always astonished by his ability to see the good in people, even after Kylo completely blew off their introduction the other day. “You good?”
“What? Uh, yeah,” Kylo answered inelegantly, clearing his throat. “Actually, I wanted to apologize for the other day when Rey introduced us. I had a lot on my mind and I was a bit rude.”
Rey’s heart glowed – he was apologizing for her.
“No problem, man,” Finn said. “I’ve been there.”
Kylo looked satisfied with Finn’s response, and walked further into the kitchen, as if he had been waiting for permission.
“What have you guys been up to on your day off?” Finn asked, placing the full kettle on the stove and turning on a burner.
“We went to Maz’s for lunch,” Rey said as she and Kylo sat on her mismatched chairs at her self-made kitchen table. “And I was just showing Kylo some of the projects I’m working on.”
“Was Maz in?” Finn asked, making his way to the table as well.
“She’s nice, but that woman still gives me the creeps,” Finn said honestly, shuddering.
“Finally!” Kylo nearly shouted, breaking his stern composure, surprising both Finn and Rey. “Someone else who thinks she’s creepy!”
“She is not!” Rey argued, frowning at him. Sure, Kylo had known Maz his whole life, but Rey liked Maz – she’d been so helpful to her as a new resident in town.
“I’m with Kylo on this one, Peanut,” Finn said, shrugging. “It’s like she’s looking into the deep dark caverns of your brain with those giant bug eyes of hers. Plus I think she’s psychic.”
Kylo laughed at that, a sound that was rare. In fact, she couldn’t remember a time that Kylo laughed at anyone besides her. What was happening?
“You guys are mean,” she scowled, folding her arms over her chest.
“I’m not saying she’s a bad person,” Kylo said, leaning forward to put his elbows on the table. It made his upper arms and shoulders bulge in a way that did something funny to Rey’s stomach. “She just doesn’t understand boundaries. And she always seems to know what’s going on, even if you haven’t seen her in weeks. I think she has a spy network, that’s who all those people are that come in from out of town to her restaurant.”
Rey had never seen Kylo speak so passionately about anything, and the fact that he had a conspiracy theory about little old Maz was hilarious. Even more hilarious was Finn looking at him seriously, nodding his head in agreement. Winter did funny things to men, she thought.
The kettle started whistling, and Finn hopped up to pick out some old mugs Rey had gotten at the consignment shop.
“Kylo, tea?” he asked, looking over.
“Please,” Kylo responded, surprising Rey. He was a coffee person, black of course. To match his soul. She tried to contain a laugh at this thought, but it didn’t work and she snorted instead.
“Something funny?” Kylo asked, looking at her with a pointed smile. Just a minute ago, he’d closed off again, but now he was smiling at her. His thaw time was becoming shorter every day they spent together.
“Nothing,” she said, unable to stop herself from grinning. “Just thought you were a coffee person.”
“I’m… flexible,” he said, raising an eyebrow.
Who was this confident man and what did he do with Kylo?
The three of them ended up chatting for nearly an hour over their tea, which surprised Rey. Kylo and Finn got along surprisingly well despite being nearly complete opposites.
“So anyway,” Finn said some time later. “I’ve tried to get Rey to go ice fishing with me last year but she won’t do it.”
“Why would I want to sit out in the cold for hours without even a guarantee that I’ll catch dinner?” she asked, still baffled by Finn’s interest in it.
“You know,” Kylo said, “my friend Poe loves to ice fish. He used to do it with his dad, and he’s been trying to get me to go the past couple of winters. Maybe he’d want to go with you.”
“Poe Dameron?” Finn asked, although he already knew the answer. “On ski patrol?”
Rey smiled. Kylo didn’t even know that Finn was interested in Poe, but this was working out perfectly. Of course it would help if they could figure out beforehand if Poe was interested in men. She could see it now, the two of them huddled close for warmth, with nothing to do but get to know each other…
“I don’t know,” Finn said, suddenly looking sheepish. “I don’t know him that well…”
“We could all hang out sometime. Then you could ask him,” Rey said vigorously, nearly kicking him under the table.
“What? Oh, yeah. Sure, that’d be cool,” he said in his best fake nonchalant voice.
Thankfully, Kylo didn’t pick up on the little things Rey picked up on.
“I think he’s coming over to my place tomorrow to watch the hockey game, you two are more than welcome to join,” Kylo suggested.
“Sounds great,” Rey said confidently before Finn could chicken out.
“Does Poe have a girlfriend?” Rey asked before she could stop herself. She wanted to get to the bottom of this. She couldn’t have her best friend going in blind.
Kylo frowned, and looked her more directly in the eyes. She saw some sort of emotion stirring there, but she couldn’t figure out what it was.
After a few moments, he answered.
“Not since high school. He’s had a few boyfriends over the past few years, but nothing serious,” he said, his voice lower and quieter than just ten seconds before.
Rey smiled over at Finn, silently rejoicing the results of her not-so-subtle investigative work. Finn looked slightly embarrassed, but she saw a genuine smile peeking out at the corners of his mouth.
“Oh, that reminds me,” Finn said, turning toward Rey. “Did Poe end up texting you? I gave him your number.”
“He asked for her number?” Kylo asked, his eyebrows now furrowed. What was wrong now?
“Yeah,” Finn said.
“I haven’t checked my phone in a while,” Rey said, standing to retrieve her phone she’d left in her jacket after lunch.
“Nope, not yet,” she answered after seeing no messages on her screen.
“What did he want?” Kylo asked Finn gravely. Why was he suddenly so grumpy again?
Finn looked at him funny, seemingly also put off by his quick change in mood.
“I don’t know,” he answered. “But they’re friends, maybe he just wanted her number to hang out or something?”
Kylo didn’t respond, and just looked down at the table. He and Poe had seemed perfectly at ease together yesterday, so Rey didn’t think they were angry with one another. Why was the Poe topic bothering him so much? She shifted gears.
“So Kylo told me that Luke has a bunch of old skis I could probably make into Adirondack furniture.”
“I can’t believe you didn’t think to ask him before,” Finn said, taking all three of their mugs to the sink. “He has so much ancient ski stuff I’m starting to think he’s secretly immortal.”
“He inherited most of it from my grandfather,” Kylo said, looking off in the distance.
“Luke’s my uncle,” he explained when he saw Finn’s confused expression.
“Oh, that’s right,” Finn said. “Rey told me that Mayor Organa is your mom. I never knew that she and Luke were twins, not just siblings.”
“They’re pretty private about it,” Kylo answered vaguely. “They didn’t grow up together. Luke was raised out in BC.”
“That’s sad,” Rey thought out loud. She had always painfully wondered if she had been separated from any siblings. Her heart ached to think about twins not being able to grow up together. “Not the BC thing, the separation thing.”
“They’re making up for it now,” Kylo shrugged.
“Well, I’ve got to head out, long day,” Finn said. “You guys are both back to work tomorrow, right?”
“Yeah,” Rey answered.
“Alright, see you there.”
Rey walked Finn to the door. As soon as they were out of sight of the kitchen table, Finn turned to her and started mouthing frantically.
“What is happening with him?” he mouthed forcefully, pointing toward the kitchen. “Are you and Kylo a thing? Did you kiss? Did you bang?”
Rey punched him in the stomach.
“Shut up!” she whispered furiously, terrified that Kylo would hear him.
“Ok, ok,” Finn said, “but the electricity between you two is deadly! Seriously! What is going on?!”
Rey covered his mouth with her hand and pushed him out the door.
“Don’t think I won’t be texting you about this!” Finn mouthed as she closed the door in her face.
Rey buried her face in her hands, praying to the ski gods that Kylo hadn’t heard anything.
When she returned to the kitchen, he thankfully seemed blissfully unaware of the conversation that had just occurred. He was holding his jacket, which he must have grabbed from the living room.
“I better go too,” he said, sliding it on.
Rey’s heart sank a little. He wanted to leave? To leave her? It was still early, not even dinner time.
“Oh,” she said meekly. She couldn’t think of anything to offer him to make him stay. She’d already shown him her workshop, they’d had tea. She didn’t have a TV or any sort of entertainment. Nothing she could use an excuse to make him stay.
“Ok,” she said instead, unable to keep the melancholy out of her voice.
He looked at her for a moment before beginning to walk toward the door. She followed him, watching his hair move gracefully against his neck. She wanted to spin him around and kiss him, and keep him. But instead she let him walk out the door.
“So we’re on for tomorrow?” she asked hopefully as he stepped outside.
“The hockey game?”
“Oh,” he said, turning his head to look at her. “Yeah, game starts at 8:00. See you then, or at work before that.”
“Ok,” she said, wishing he’d at least hug her goodbye.
He didn’t. He kept walking, all the way out to his car. He waved at her before stepping into it, but didn’t look again as he started it up and peeled down the road.
Rey was left standing in her front door, shivering in the cold, wondering what had gone wrong.
Kylo felt so stupid. He’d spent the whole previous two days with Rey, thinking she might like him, only for it to end with her asking about Poe. And apparently Poe was interested in her too, since he’d asked Finn for her number. He thought Poe knew that he liked Rey, but once again, his inability to explicitly state his feelings or share anything even with his closest friend had come to bite him in the ass. Of course she’d just been using him to get to Poe. 90% of the girls that approached him only spoke to him to get an introduction to Poe. It usually didn’t bother him too much, but this was Rey. Someone he thought maybe could be something real, something life-changing. Someone he thought might be made just for him.
He slammed his hand into the steering wheel. The streets were always quiet this early in the morning when he drove to work, long before the mountain opened. It was a good thing too, since Kylo probably would have run over any cars in his way. He’d felt so light and content the past two days, and his usual mood had crashed back over him violently. He’d slept terribly, recounting every interaction he and Rey had ever had, trying to figure out how he had read the signs so wrong. He’d spent the morning on the punching bag, trying to punch away his frustration.
Now he was headed to a job he hated, where he’d have to see the girl he wanted but couldn’t have, and his best friend who’d end up getting her. And then he’d have to host them that night for the hockey game and watch them. He could cancel, but his mother had drilled etiquette into his psyche, and if she ever heard he uninvited anyone other than Poe to his place, he’d never hear the end of it.
He wanted to wish Rey and Poe well, but he just couldn’t. He was too heartbroken. He pulled into the resort staff parking lot, killing the engine. He just sat there for a moment, pondering what would happen if he just left and never came back. Working for Snoke was a nightmare, but he didn’t have a lot of other options. And if he left, he wouldn’t be able to see Rey everyday. Especially if her free time was filled with Poe Dameron. So he pulled himself out of his car and trudged into the locker room, dreading the long work day in front of him.
I know it's painfully slow, y'all. TRUST ME. I KNOW. I promise we are getting there soon!
Chapter 16: Poe
Rey talks with Poe, and Kylo mopes.
Of course he’d be working the Shit Lift today. The chair under the bunny hill, where he’d have to deadlift whiny kids all day on and off of the chair. Just hours of feeling the sting of rejection as Rey made it clear that she was interested in Poe Dameron, not him. He’d pondered just quitting and leaving this morning in the parking lot – he should have done it. Then he wouldn’t be stuck working the worst lift at the resort.
A few hours passed before he saw her. Rey. She was at the bottom of the bunny hill, with her usual group lesson of kids she had every Saturday. They were a bit older, maybe around 8 or 9. He remembered taking the weekend group lessons as a kid, it was a deal for local kids to get a reduced lesson rate if they signed up for the whole season.
She was busy checking their bindings and their helmets, making sure they were ready to go. She was so good with them, and they all loved her. She was always maxed out, she got the most requests from parents. He helped a few more beginners onto the lift before her group made their way over to his chair.
“Hi Kylo,” Rey said to him cheerfully, apparently unaware of how badly she had hurt him.
“Hi,” he responded sullenly, avoiding eye contact with her.
The lift only fit two people per chair, so she hopped on the first one with the least experienced kid in her group. Kylo knew he’d have to make sure the other kids got on safely behind her.
He helped another pair of her students on the chair before the lift came to a halt. It wasn’t uncommon for the lift to stop frequently, beginners often fell at both the bottom and top of the chair. Someone at the top must have stopped it. From where he was standing, he could see Rey talking to her student she was sitting with, and the other pair of students behind them.
“Mr. Kylo, are you Miss Rey’s husband?”
Kylo whipped his gaze to the remaining kids in her group, who were waiting for the lift to restart and looking at him skeptically.
“I’m… what?!” he asked, sure he heard them wrong.
“I said, are you Miss Rey’s husband?” one of the boys asked again.
“No, what? No…”
“Are you her boyfriend?” the remaining girl asked confidently.
“She looks at you like you’re her boyfriend,” the boy said.
Kylo felt his ears heat up, and he was thankful to be wearing a hat that covered them. His mouth gaped open, completely at a loss for words.
“And you like her,” another boy said.
“How come you’re not her boyfriend?” the girl asked.
Kylo didn’t know how to respond, but figured honestly was the best policy. Kids knew when someone was lying.
“I don’t think she wants me to be her boyfriend,” he said quietly, trying to keep his voice down. He was already afraid one of the other instructors in line for the lift would overhear them.
“But she always looks for you,” the second boy said loudly.
“And I heard her talking about you with Mr. Finn the other day,” the girl added.
“Well, I think she wants someone else to be her boyfriend,” Kylo said, praying the lift would start again so he could escape this humiliating conversation.
“I don’t think so,” the first boy said, frowning.
Thankfully, the lift started up again, slowly building speed. He helped the remainder of Rey’s group board, and sighed in relief when they were all airborne. He’d have to try to look more intimidating so that they didn’t talk to him again.
He wondered how many times her group would go up and down the bunny hill that day, how many times she’d speak to him with her lovely voice and her bright eyes. And if the kids would continue pestering him.
Rey finished her group lesson a bit disappointed. Kylo was still being weird, he had been since last night about the time when Finn left. He didn’t even look her in the eye once all day, and she’d been up and down the bunny hill all morning with her students, where he was working the chairlift. She racked her brain, but she couldn’t think of any particular reason he would be mad at her. He was always kind of emo or grumpy, but usually not with her. Maybe he was just in a bad mood for some external reason. She wanted to cheer him up, but wasn’t sure how.
She had about an hour break before her next lesson. She pulled her phone out to check it, and saw a text from an unknown number.
hey, it’s Poe! do you have a break today? let me know when
She smiled, adding him as a contact into her phone.
hi! yeah, i have a break right now. an hour.
He responded right away.
cool, can you meet me in the Hut in like 5 mins?
sure. something wrong?
nah, just wanna talk
Rey wondered what could be so urgent that wasn’t something bad, but headed out toward the Hut anyway. She clipped into her skis again and hopped onto the B chair, which you needed to take to get to the Hut near the bottom of the C chair. She pulled up to the decrepit building from behind and leaned her skis and poles against the wall obscured by the woods. Poe’s skis were already there.
She used her key that Kylo had given her to let herself in. She found Poe lounging in his usual spot in the hammock, apparently already on break.
“Hey,” she said, greeting him.
“Hey, Rey,” he said brightly in usual charming way. “Woah, that rhymes!”
“You’re a true poet,” she teased, sinking into Kylo’s usual chair. It was easier to get out of than old Bertha, which had become her designated spot in the Hut.
“How was your day off yesterday?” Poe asked, reaching out of the hammock to grab a granola bar off of the counter and tossing it to her.
“It was good. Kylo and I just hung out mostly.”
“Hmm,” Poe responded, tilting his head to look over at her pensievely.
“I just… ok. I’m trying to figure out how to say this.”
“Nothing’s wrong,” he quickly assured her. He paused for a few seconds before continuing.
“So,” he began, “it’s been really fun hanging out with you recently. It’s really nice having a third member of the Hut Boys.”
“Are you kicking me out?” she asked, her abandonment issues flying left, right and center.
“What? No! I told you it wasn’t bad!” Poe said fervently.
“I’ve… I’ve been friends with Kylo basically our entire lives,” he continued more calmly.
“And I have never seen him like someone as much as he likes you.”
Rey had to take a few seconds to process what he was saying.
“Now I know that you’re a wonderful person and would never do it intentionally,” Poe said, rushing as if he was impatient to spit it out, “but I guess I’m just telling you so that you don’t accidentally lead him on.”
“Lead him on?”
“Yeah,” Poe confirmed. “He’s a really sensitive guy, as you may have gathered. Don’t tell him I said that though. And he’s been hurt a lot in his life, and I just want to protect him. If you don’t feel the same way about him, it may be better for him if you… you know… back off a bit.”
“You think I’m leading him on?” she asked, a bit hurt.
“I don’t know…,” he said, raising his hands defensively, “I’m not accusing you of anything. That’s what I wanted to discuss with you. You two were pretty tight at Thanksgiving, and you hang out all the time…”
“Does he really like me that much?”
“He hasn’t told me explicitly,” Poe responded. “But I can tell. It’s obvious to someone who’s known him as long as I’ve known him.”
“I don’t know… he’s been pretty shut off since last night. He won’t even look at me today.”
“Really? What happened last night?”
“I don’t know,” she answered honestly. “We were fine, we were hanging out with Finn and drinking tea and he was joking with us and everything and then all of a sudden he completely closed down. I thought maybe it was just something personal but he almost looked angry at me this morning.”
“Do you like him?”
Rey’s mouth opened, ready to deny it and defend herself. But the look on Poe’s face was so honest, so understanding. If she couldn’t admit it to someone who cared about him that much, how would she ever tell Kylo? It was time for her to put her big girl pants on and start taking action.
“I do,” she said quietly, as if the walls could hear her. “I’m crazy about him.”
She saw Poe’s mouth slowly lift into a gigantic smile.
“I knew it!”
“How did you know?!” she asked angrily at his smug expression.
“Please, Rey, it’s sooo obvious,” he said, back to his usual carefree demeanor. “You two can’t keep your hands off of eachother. An alien could tell that you guys are into each other.”
“It’s not that obvious,” Rey grumbled grumpily.
Poe scoffed, putting his hands behind his head in his normal cocky way.
“Well if it’s so obvious that I like him, why won’t he make a move?” she asked, picking a tennis ball off of the floor and pelting it at Poe.
“Oh, no. He’s way too insecure to do that,” he said, dodging her assault.
“I’ve been dropping hints like crazy but he won’t take the bait,” she whined.
“He’s pretty dense, you’ll probably have to spell things out for him,” Poe explained. “In high school a girl literally told him she wanted to go to prom with him and he still thought she was joking.”
“Yeah, he’s hopeless. He’s actually pretty good at picking up girls, but terrible at starting relationships.”
Rey didn’t want to think about him with picking up other girls. Did she need to be worried? Would he move on to someone else?
“I’m not sure,” Poe responded thoughtfully. “I’ve never seen him act this way around anyone else. You might have a better chance at getting through to him than anyone before.”
“I just don’t want to fuck this up and ruin our friendship,” she admitted, crossing her arms over herself protectively.
“Hey, me neither,” Poe said sternly, “I don’t want to be caught in a custody battle between you two.”
Rey laughed, throwing Poe a smile.
“Kylo would win that, you’ve been friends longer.”
“Yeah, but you smell better and restocked the Hut snack bar.”
“That’s true,” she said, giggling, agreeing with the second statement.
“Are you gonna talk to him?”
“Maybe,” she said. “He invited me and Finn over to watch the hockey game with you guys tonight. That was before he got angry, though.”
“Come over,” Poe said earnestly. “I’ll distract Finn so you guys can get some alone time.”
Rey pondered his plan, secretly pleased that it would do wonders for her matchmaking attempt between Poe and Finn.
“Sure, that works I guess,” she tried to say casually.
She looked up at the clock and noticed the time.
“I’ve got to go,” she said, pulling herself up out of Kylo’s chair. “I need to talk to Luke before my next lesson.”
“I should get back out there too,” Poe said, practically rolling out of the hammock and thudding down on his ski boots. “Save lives, that kind of stuff.”
“So modest,” she laughed, rolling her eyes.
They laughed as they left the Hut, closing the door behind them. They both clipped in and parted ways, waving goodbye. Rey had a lot to think about before the hockey game.
Kylo was just starting to walk over to the Hut for his break when he saw Rey and Poe leaving it together. They were laughing, and something ugly twisted inside of him, wrapping it’s tentacles around his heart. They didn’t see him, and he watched as they both skied away. She really did want Poe. He had been so sure not even 24 hours ago that he wasn’t alone in believing he had a connection with her, that she had felt it too, but his entire dream was now crashing down around him.
He didn’t even want to go to the Hut anymore, not after they’d been in there alone, probably doing the things he wanted to do with Rey. He turned around, heading toward the lodge. He’d just sit in the lodge on his break like the rest of the staff. He couldn’t believe he was going to have them over tonight, and would have to watch as Poe shamelessly flirted with her like he did with everyone else he was interested in.
He kicked a pile of snow as he walked by it, spraying it out in front of him.
“Kylo!” he heard shouted from behind him.
He turned to see Rey skiing toward him. Apparently she had seen him.
He continued walking, and she sped just past him to turn around and ski backwards as he made his way toward the lodge. What a show off.
“Hey,” she said, facing him, gently curving to and fro backwards on her skis.
“Hi,” he said plainly.
“Is something wrong?” she asked, looking genuinely worried.
He supposed it wasn’t her fault – it was perfectly natural to be interested in someone else, and it wasn’t like he’d told her about his feelings anyway. This was all his own fault.
“No, no,” he said, shaking his head, looking down at the snow. “Just having a bad day.”
“Was it something I did?”
He looked up at her face, etched with concern. Why did she have to look like that at him?
“No, of course not,” he said. He would never want her to think he was angry with her. He was just angry at the situation. Not her. Never her.
“Ok… you kind of got weird last night right before you and Finn left, I thought maybe it was something I did…”
“No, I just got wrapped up in my head. I’m not mad at you,” he kept walking, just wanting to escape the conversation. He needed some space to think things through and regain his composure. He still wanted to be her friend, even if she was with Poe. He couldn’t stand the thought of not being around her, not being her friend. She was easily the best part of any day he saw her. He needed some time alone before he accidentally said something that would ruin things between them.
“Ok… if you’re sure…” she said, sounding unconvinced. She continued skating backwards so that she could look at him head on as he walked toward the lodge.
“I’ve got to go,” she said, sounding sad. “See you tonight.”
Kylo watched her ski away, cursing himself for not telling her sooner. Not that it would have made any difference, but at least then he wouldn’t have to pretend to not be jealous. He was dreading tonight, having Poe and Rey over. At least Finn would be there – less opportunity for intimacy. He had to admit he kind of liked the guy, he could understand why Rey was friends with him.
He settled into a chair by the fireplace, cursing himself for being so… himself. Never being honest with himself or others. Never putting himself out there. Never pursuing the girls he actually liked. Never not taking the easy way out. If he could do it again, he’d tell her. He’d tell her that she was the best part of his day, that even though they’d only been friends for a month that he felt deeply connected to her, that he wanted to go further with her, that he liked her so much it was terrifying.
Would she laugh in his face if he told her those things? Would she pity him? She was so deeply kind – once she realized he wasn’t joking she’d probably let him down gently, with compassion in her eyes. He sighed and leaned back, letting his head fall back against the chair. It physically hurt to think about her with someone else.
Chapter 17: Hockey
Rey and Finn go over to Kylo's to watch the hockey game with him and Poe, but things take a sour turn.
Rey knocked on Kylo’s door. She’d never actually been to his apartment before. They’d always just hung out in the Hut, or gone to Poe’s place, or gone out to eat. She’d only recently been to his parents’ house, and then he’d been over to her place for the first time the night before. She felt weirdly nervous, like she was seeing a new part of him. She hoped he was in a better mood, something had clearly been wrong earlier. She’d seen right through his denial, something was definitely bothering him.
Finn was running a few minutes late, having gotten caught up running errands with Rose. Maybe she should have waited for him. Why was she anxious? She hung out with Poe and Kylo all the time… perhaps it was the prospect of finally getting Kylo to recognize that she was flirting with him… She waited as she heard shuffling behind the door, then heavy footsteps. She held her breath as the door opened.
Kylo appeared, running a hand through his hair. He was wearing a tight grey thermal shirt, and black jeans that highlighted his strong thighs. He looked so overwhelmingly handsome in that moment that she forgot to release the breath she was holding. She gasped instead, causing her to inhale too much. She coughed violently as a result, choking on her own air, nearly doubling over to catch her breath. Smooth, Rey.
For his part, Kylo looked worried, reaching out to clap a hand gently on her back before smoothing it up to her shoulder.
“Are you ok?” he asked with his deep voice as she struggled to breathe.
“I’m good,” she croaked once she was able to inhale and exhale properly. What an excellent start to an evening full of what she hoped would be seduction and not-so-subtle hinting at her feelings for him.
His fingers were gently massaging her shoulder in a comforting gesture, and she nearly forgot to breathe again. His large, warm hands that she’d always liked...
“Hey, Rey!” she heard come from behind Kylo. She peeked around him to see Poe already sprawled out on his couch, hand buried in a chip bag.
“Hey,” she said, smiling, recalling their conversation from earlier that day. When he confirmed that Kylo did in fact like her, that she wasn’t imagining things.
She looked back at Kylo, who was back to looking as stern as ever. He’d taken his hand off of her shoulder, and was now standing back, letting her inside. She hadn’t seen his beautiful, rare smile in over a day, and she decided then and there that she would do everything she could to make him do it tonight.
Kylo closed the door behind them, and offered to take her coat. She shed her boots as well for good measure, not wanting to trudge wet snow into his apartment. She’d forgotten about her mismatched socks she was wearing, and hoped Kylo wouldn’t notice.
She made her way into the living area, deciding to sit on the empty second couch, hoping it would mean Kylo would sit next to her.
“Do you want anything to drink?” she heard him ask from the kitchen. “Tea? Water? Beer?”
“Beer would be awesome,” she replied, taking a look around his place.
The walls were bare, but she was able to detect little morsels of his personality scattered around. There was a chess set sitting on one of the shelves of his TV stand – he had told her that his Uncle Chewie was a master and that he’d spent countless hours of his childhood playing with him. There was a photograph of him as a teenager with his parents in a nice frame sitting on a side table, Rey could only assume Leia had given it to him as a gift. Nevertheless, it was a nice photo of them looking out over what looked like a European city. He was already taller than his dad, and his ears were helplessly oversized, not quite having grown into them yet and not quite having the hair length to cover them. It made her heart warm in a pleasant way. There was also a large bookshelf near the hallway completely overstuffed with books. They looked worn, like he’d read them all hundreds of times. She could see little notes sticking out of some, and desperately wanted to know what was written on them.
Kylo reappeared, holding two beers. He handed one to her, and awkwardly sat down next to her. The pre-game show was on the TV, and they all watched silently for a few minutes. Rey liked hockey. She’d played street hockey with some of the other foster kids, but she’d never had the luxury of a TV to watch the professionals. She liked that it was a rough and tumble game – it was her kind of sport. She recalled the way Kylo had explained American football to her, and wondered if she should pretend to not know the rules to hockey so that he’d lean in close to her ear again, wrapping his arm around her on the couch.
She scanned the room, and saw Poe making eyes at her. He was wiggling his eyebrows and looking between her and Kylo. She scowled at him, whipping her gaze toward Kylo to make sure he hadn’t seen him. He hadn’t. She made what she hoped were dangerous eyes at Poe, silently warning him to stop.
Thankfully, a loud knock sounded on the door, and Rey jumped up.
“I’ll get it!” she said enthusiastically, running toward the door.
She ushered Finn inside, after hugging him. She’d be far less nervous with her friend there to help her look less like an idiot. She hoped he wouldn’t let her embarrass herself too badly. It was either that or he was going to be way too obvious about everything and scare Kylo off. One of the two.
Now that she thought about it, she had both Finn and Poe on her side. She couldn’t remember ever having enough friends to accomplish something like this. It felt good. And if the night ended in either her bed or Kylo’s, it would be even better.
Both Poe and Kylo had gotten up off of the couches upon Finn’s arrival. Kylo greeted him and took his coat, and Poe followed close behind.
“Hey again, Finn,” Poe said, offering a hand out to him. “Good to see you again.”
“Hey! Hi,” Finn said, accepting his handshake. It seemed to linger a few moments too long, or maybe that was just Rey’s hopeful imagination.
“Can I get you something to drink?” Poe offered to Finn, leading them into the kitchen.
“Just water, please.”
Rey knew Finn didn’t like to drink when he was already stressed or nervous about something. She was the opposite. She hoped her beer would loosen her up.
“Ice?” Poe asked, throwing his signature charming smile at him.
“What?” Finn asked, looking starstruck. “Oh, yes. Please.”
She watched Finn watch Poe pour him a glass of water like it was the sexiest thing on the planet. Damn, Finn had it bad.
Eventually, they all found their way back to the living room. Poe sat down first in what appeared to be his usual spot. Kylo, much to Rey’s pleasure, sat on the other couch. She happily sat down next to him, leaving the spot next to Poe open for Finn.
Kylo looked at her strangely, with what looked like a confused frown.
The game was starting, and Poe and Finn were quickly becoming engrossed in it. Kylo seemed less interested. She could feel his gaze on her sometimes when she was trying not to stare at him. She tried moving closer to him, micrometer by micrometer, hoping she was being subtle. She contemplated pretending to be tired and putting her head on his shoulder, but she didn’t want him to think she was too tired to hang out with him, or do… anything else.
She tried another more drastic approach. She noticed Poe had his feet up on the couch earlier, so she figured it would be ok for her to do so as well. She stood partway up and pulled her feet under her, resettling right next to Kylo, her thigh touching his. She felt him stiffen, and was surprised by his reaction. He’d sought her touch before, and now was acting like he was disgusted by her. There was no way whatever was going on with him wasn’t about her. But it was too late to move.
They all talked and joked through the commercial breaks, Poe laughing a bit louder than necessary at Finn. Rey couldn’t keep back a grin as Poe displayed all the common traits of someone with a crush. He clapped Finn on the back after a joke, and leaned into him as he laughed. Poe’s eyes never left him. They started talking just between the two of them, seeming to forget that Rey and Kylo were even there.
Well that was quick, she thought to herself. They’d made more progress in 30 minutes than she had with Kylo in a month.
She pulled her phone out to text Poe.
omg! you’re flirting with Finn so hard rn
Poe pulled out his phone at the vibration, subtly reading it by his leg furthest from Finn. Finn’s attention had returned to the game for the moment.
you should ask him out!
is he gay??
i’ll kill you if he’s straight
noted. i promise.
ok. i’ll ask him later
She smiled, tucking her phone back into her sweater pocket. Doing so, she unintentionally leaned further into Kylo. She heard him angrily exhale and when she turned to look at him he was glaring into the distance. She’d finally had enough of whatever this was.
“Kylo, could I talk to you in the kitchen?” she said rigidly, leaving no room for argument.
She stood up off of the couch, offering her hand to pull him up. He seemed to accept it without thinking twice, but let go immediately, as if scalded.
Kylo was so wildly uncomfortable. First, when he’d left the seat next to Poe open for Rey, she’d discarded it in favor of sitting next to him for some reason. He’d have to deal with the scent of her that he loved, with the soft rustling of her oversized sweater as she fidgeted. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw her and Poe make faces at each other. He turned away, his stomach roiling.
Then, her thigh came to touch his, reminiscent of Thanksgiving. She couldn’t know how it tortured him, to have her so close but unable to wrap his arms around her and pull her into his lap. He wanted to respect her wishes – she wasn’t interested in him that way, and she preferred Poe. But the physical contact was making it so hard.
He really wished he hadn’t looked when she pulled out her phone. Of course she was texting Poe. She was literally 8 feet away from him but something was so private, so intimate that she needed to text him from the next couch over. He pulled his eyes away – he didn’t want to know what she was telling him.
When she’d put her phone away, he felt her gaze rest on his profile.
“Kylo, could I talk to you in the kitchen?” she said suddenly, sounding so frighteningly like Leia that he didn’t even hesitate to obey. Her hand found his and pulled him up off the couch. He let go instantly, trying not to love the way her hand felt in his.
He followed her as she stomped toward the kitchen, watching her three buns shake in anger.
She whipped around to face him once they were out of sight of the living room.
“Seriously, what is wrong?” she asked, frowning and pointing at his chest. “Are you mad at me? Can you please just tell me so we can get past whatever this is?”
“Whatever what is?”
“You!” she whisper shouted, glancing toward the entryway back toward the living room. Thankfully, they were out of sight, but probably not completely out of earshot. “You’ve been avoiding me! And glaring at me! I’m sorry for whatever I did, ok? Can you just tell me so I can apologize and you can go back to being my friend?”
Kylo stood in stunned silence. She was so determined to not let him push her away. No one had ever done that for him. He loved her for it, but at the same time he had to. He had to push. He wouldn’t be able to stand it if they remained so close but he couldn’t have her.
“You didn’t do anything wrong…” he said grumpily, not sure what to say.
“Then why are you being like this?” she asked exasperatedly, throwing her hands up. She was cute even when she was angry.
“Sorry I’m not happy-go-lucky all the time,” he said defensively. “Like you. Or Poe.”
“I know you’re all emo and… whatever,” she replied, huffing. “And I like you that way. But that doesn't mean you can just be an asshole because you feel like it!”
He hadn’t meant to be an asshole to her. He really hadn’t. He’d just been trying to distance himself a bit, so that he wouldn’t hurt as bad.
“Why do you keep telling me what to do?” he asked harshly, immediately regretting the words. It felt like fighting with his parents all over again.
“I’m not!” she said louder. Poe and Finn would definitely be able to hear them now. “I’m just frustrated because you’re one of my best friends and I’ve opened up to you and now you’re just shutting me out! I know I can’t tell you what to do but I’m asking you to let me back in!”
Kylo’s heart sank. She was so lovely, so loving. He wanted nothing more than to let her in, to let her brighten in his darkness. He didn’t want to shut her out. Not even a little bit. But the pain of keeping her away would be less devastating than the pain of having to live with seeing her with Poe every day.
“Why don’t you go ask Poe to let you in?” he said, nearly choking on the words he didn’t want to say.
That made her take a step back. Her hands, with which she had been gesturing violently, came slowly down and then wrapped themselves around her torso. Her face was quiet, but he saw a deep sadness emerge behind her eyes. He wanted to step forward, to take her in his arms, to hug away her expression.
“I thought,” she said softly, a strand of hair falling out of her buns. “I thought you felt the same way about me.”
Wrong. I feel so much more than you.
He didn’t know what to say. He turned away, unable to look at her when she looked like that, like he’d broken her. He leaned against the kitchen counter, closing his eyes and hanging his head. He heard her sniffle, and hated himself more than ever. He walked out of the kitchen without looking back, grabbing his beer on the way. He guzzled it down, ready to drink away the pain. It was still only the second period of the hockey game. Was there a graceful way to kick everyone out?
He walked into the living room to see Poe and Finn quietly sitting on the couch, no longer smiling and laughing like they had been. Fuck, they’d probably heard their raised voices.
He stood. He couldn’t sit on the empty couch, he couldn’t sit next to Rey anymore.
Thankfully, Finn stood up.
“I’m just gonna get some more water,” he said, grabbing his nearly full glass from the coffee table and walking toward the kitchen.
Finn would be the one to comfort Rey. At least it was better than Poe.
He sat down next to his friend, burying his head in his hands. This evening was going worse than expected, and it hadn’t even been an hour.
“Dude, what is going on?” Poe asked him.
“Why do you care?” Kylo retorted.
“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?”
“Nothing, sorry. Just in a terrible mood.”
“You know what’s good for a terrible mood? Some good old-fashioned snogging,” Poe said with his characteristic swag, nudging him in the side with an elbow.
“Snogging? Are you British now?”
“Hey, back off. Rey taught it to me. I’m trying it out.”
“Well why don’t you do some snogging, then,” Kylo countered.
“Believe me, I’m trying,” Poe said more seriously, glancing toward the kitchen.
That was enough. Poe kissing Rey was the furthest thing from what Kylo wanted to talk about. He needed to get out before he ended up punching his best friend in the face.
He stood up, giving Poe a solid glare before walking off.
“I’ll be right back.”
“Where are you going?”
Kylo didn’t answer. He didn’t know where he was going. He just couldn’t stay in the apartment any longer.
He passed by the kitchen on his way to the front door, and saw Finn and Rey standing in the corner, speaking in hushed tones, looking concerned. His eyes caught Rey’s, and he saw a deep, heart-wrenching grief in them. It made him want to cry. He knew she had issues, especially when it came to trusting people, letting people love her. And he’d just done exactly what she feared most – pushed her away with no explanation.
He barreled through the door, and stormed down the hallway of the apartment building. He was angry at Rey for not loving him back. He was angry at Poe for taking something of his, again. But mostly he was angry at himself, for being stupid enough to let something so special slip through his fingers. He was angry at himself for not being good enough, for the millionth time in his life. He was angry at Snoke for making him betray his family. And then angry again at himself for hurting people he loved.
He didn’t know where to go. He could take a drive, or a walk. But he didn’t grab a coat or his keys on the way out, and was only wearing thin shoes, nothing suited for the snow. Instead he sat in the staircase at the end of the hallway. It was less insulated, and the cold air was soothing, almost cooling away some of his heated rage.
He sat there for what could have been a few minutes but felt more like hours, staring at his feet on the concrete step below him. When he’d calmed down enough, he slowly strolled back to his apartment. He took a deep breath he hoped would center him and opened the door. He found Rey and Finn behind it, putting on their coats.
“Are you leaving?” he asked lowly. He didn’t want Rey to leave. Ever.
“Yes,” she said curtly, avoiding eye contact with him. “It sounds like you’ve a had a long day, I’ll get out of your hair.”
He wanted to protest, to tell her she was never unwelcome, to tell her he wanted her hands in his hair, nails clawing his scalp...
“And I’m actually pretty tired. Our friend Rose dropped me off here, so Rey’s going to give me a ride home,” Finn added politely. He was clearly trying to diffuse the situation.
Poe was standing behind them, looking significantly less happy than normal.
“You’ll text me?” he asked.
Kylo assumed he was asking Rey, but it was Finn who replied.
“Yeah, I’ll text you tomorrow,” Finn said, as Rey used him for balance as she toed on her boots.
Kylo stood to the side as they finished wrapping up and reopened the door. Rey hesitated before looking at him. She met his eyes, and started to reach a hand toward him, but pulled it back. It broke his heart all over again.
“Bye. See you tomorrow,” she said, in the same quiet, hurt voice from the kitchen.
He didn’t say anything. He couldn’t.
“Thanks for having us over,” Finn said, guiding her through the door.
The door shut behind them, and Kylo stared at it, wishing this was all a nightmare and that he’d wake up and be able to redo the entire day.
Chapter 18: Pajamas
Kylo learns the truth.
The door shut behind them, and Kylo stared at it, wishing this was all a nightmare and that he’d wake up and be able to redo the entire day.
“Ok so what the fuck is going on?” Poe said after a minute, after they heard the door to the stairwell down the hallway shut loudly.
Kylo turned around to look at him. So he really didn’t know? It was almost comforting that at least his best friend wasn’t doing this to him on purpose. Almost.
“Nothing,” he lied for the hundredth time that day.
“What’s going on between you and Rey?” Poe asked more directly, not giving up.
“Wouldn’t you like to know?”
“Yes, I would. Why the hell are you saying it like that?”
“Saying it like what? Saying it like I have to defend every interaction I have with her to you?” Kylo seethed.
Poe looked thoroughly confused, he was never good at masking his emotions.
“What?” he asked.
“Don’t worry, I’m stepping out of your way.”
“Wait, what?” Poe repeated, stepping toward him.
“I know what’s going on between you two.”
“Who? Between me and Rey?” Poe asked, cocking his head.
“Yeah. It’s fine. You two can do whatever you want, marry her for all I care. I just don’t want to talk about it right now,” he said, walking over to the TV and turning it off.
Poe was still standing there, looking shell shocked. Clearly he hadn’t expected Kylo to know about them. He slowly turned to watch Kylo throw in some headphones and plug them into his phone. He was going to need music real soon to help him escape the moment.
“Kylo… I don’t think you realize–” Poe started, approaching him slowly like one would a scared animal.
“Poe I really can’t talk about this right now. Sorry to kick you out, but I’m exhausted and need to hit the hay.”
“Kylo, can I just–”
“I’m serious dude. I’m really not in a great mood, and I don’t want to say anything I’ll regret.”
“But I need to tell you something–”
“I’m sorry, I’m going to bed,” he interrupted again, stalking toward his bedroom. He really didn’t want to get in a fight with Poe, too. Losing one friend was enough for the night. “Please lock the door on the way out.”
Kylo slammed his bedroom door, locking it from the inside. He turned on the music on his phone and cranked up the volume hopefully loud enough to drown out any noise. He didn’t even stop to take off his jeans, he just collapsed into his bed.
He faintly heard Poe knocking hard on his bedroom door and jiggling the handle, but he didn’t get up. Poe then called him, but he sent him to voicemail. He’d rather isolate himself for a day and piss Poe off than lose him as a friend forever by saying something nasty to him.
After nearly 10 minutes, he heard his front door shut close. Finally.
Rey pulled her old car up beside Finn’s apartment building.
“Are you sure you don’t want to spend the night?” he asked again.
“No,” she answered, smiling softly at him. “Thanks for offering though. I think I just need my own bed.”
“I’m sorry he treated you that way,” he said, reaching over to pat her on the arm.
“Me too,” she sighed. “I don’t know what happened. I thought maybe tonight would finally be the night, but I guess Poe was mistaken. He clearly doesn’t like me very much right now.”
“That can’t be it, something else has to be going on,” Finn said. “He’s been looking at you like the goddess you are for over a year now.”
“What, are you saying you didn’t notice?”
“No.. he…” she stuttered.
“Rey why do you think he came to the bakery every day over the summer?” Finn asked.
She honestly didn’t know the answer. She’d never questioned it. They had plenty of daily customers, but now that she thought about it, they were mostly old retirees, who used the bakery as a social gathering post. Kylo never met anyone there, he just chatted with Rey.
“I’m telling you, it’s not that he doesn’t like you. Something else is wrong,” Finn continued. “We’ll figure this out. But first he better apologize for being such a dick. You don’t deserve that. I’ll fight him if you need me to.”
Rey caught his hand with hers, and squeezed it affectionately. If she couldn’t have Kylo, at least she’d have Finn as a friend.
“That’s sweet,” she said, “but we both know I have a better chance of beating him up than you.”
“Yeah,” Finn agreed, “but it felt like I was supposed to at least offer.”
Rey laughed, which felt good after such a shitty night.
“Ok,” he said, letting go of your hand. “Call me if you change your mind. I’ll drive over and we can have a sleepover.”
“Thanks,” she said sincerely, giving him as much of a smile as she could.
“See you tomorrow, girl. Don’t let stupid men get you down.”
“Love you too, Peanut,” he said, closing the car door and dashing through the cold nighttime air into his building.
Rey sighed, trying to release the stress and tension from the night away into the atmosphere with her breath. Reluctantly, all of a sudden exhausted, she pulled away from Finn’s building and drove to her lonely home.
Rey had barely fallen asleep when she awoke to a loud ringing. It wasn’t her alarm tone, it was her actual ringtone. No one had ever called her in the middle of the night before.
“Hello?” she answered groggily, her eyes still too cloudy to make out whose name it was on the screen.
“Yeah, sorry if I woke you,” he said.
“What time is it?”
“Just past 11.”
“Oh, no worries, I think I had just fallen asleep.”
“Sorry,” he repeated.
“No problem, what’s up?”
“I just talked to Finn...” he started.
“Did you ask him out?” she asked excitedly, the prospect instantly waking her up.
“What? Oh… no… no yet. This is about Kylo.”
“Oh,” she said dejectedly. She really didn’t want to think about Kylo any more tonight.
“So there’s been a massive understanding…”
Rey listened in shock as Poe explained what Kylo had said to him when they left his apartment. Apparently he was under the impression that Rey was attracted to Poe of all people, and that he was interested in her in return. She sat up in bed in dismay.
“Tell me about it.”
He continued by explaining that Kylo was trying to ‘step out of the way’, which explained why he had been acting so cold toward them.
“How did he even… why does he think we are into each other?” she asked, completely bewildered by the whole scenario.
“That… I’m not so sure on,” he answered. “I spoke to Finn and our hypothesis is that when you were making an attempt to set us up that Kylo misinterpreted it and thought you were trying to set yourself up with me.”
“Oh my god,” she groaned, getting out of bed and stumbling to the kitchen. She would need some tea after this.
“What did he say when you told him that you like Finn and that I like him?” she asked.
“I… didn’t exactly get a chance to correct him,” Poe said slowly.
“He sort of kicked me out and slammed the door in my face when I tried. He locked his bedroom door and had headphones in. After a few minutes of trying I left his apartment and I locked the door behind me and called Finn. Now Kylo isn’t answering any of my calls or texts.”
“So let me get this straight,” Rey said, sitting at her kitchen table, cradling her head in one hand and holding her phone in the other. “Kylo thinks that we like each other and he’s so butthurt about it that he’s literally hiding in his room?”
“Damn,” she muttered. He must really want her.
“And you’re positive this is all because he likes me?” she confirmed with Poe.
“Ok I’m about to do something really smart or really stupid,” she said, standing up and walking into her workshop to grab a small bag.
“I’ll tell you tomorrow.”
“Rey, what are you doing?” Poe asked, sounding worried.
“I’m going to get what I want,” she said, hanging up the phone.
Kylo glared over at his bedroom door, which someone was banging on loudly. Didn’t he tell Poe to lock the apartment behind him when he left the first time? Why didn’t he? And why was he back? He didn’t answer, he just went back to staring out the window, headphones still in.
After a few seconds, Poe began knocking again.
“I can’t talk right now!” he yelled angrily at the door, “I’ll call you tomorrow.”
He heard Poe yell something through the door, but his music drowned him out. After a moment, Kylo’s brain caught up to something – the voice was too high-pitched to be Poe’s.
He yanked the earphones out and paused his music.
“... better open the fucking door, Kylo Ren!” he heard Rey finish.
Rey? What was she doing here?
In his surprise, he automatically leapt out of bed and opened his bedroom door. Rey was standing there in her winter coat over what looked like pajamas.
“Rey!” he said, still perplexed by her sudden appearance at his apartment. “How did you get in?”
“Picked your bloody lock,” she said, throwing what looked like a small, thin tool to the ground.
Kylo had barely a moment to be impressed before she took off her coat and threw it toward the living room. She was wearing pajamas that looked like they’d come from the little boys’ section – they were light blue had little illustrations various tools on them – wrenches, hammers, saws… She looked adorable.
“Kylo I need to say something and you need to promise to not interrupt me,” she said seriously, facing him again and placing her hands on her hips, looking much larger than her thin physique should allow.
He was still awkwardly standing in the doorframe of his bedroom. Did she want to sit in the living room? She looked so insistent that he didn’t want to ask her anything that was off topic…
“Ok,” he said simply.
She sighed deeply. “I can’t believe I’m doing this,” she muttered to herself.
She looked back up at him.
“Being with you this past month has been basically the best month of my entire life,” she started.
Where the fuck was this going?
“I like you a lot. And it’s clear you like me. So you can understand that it must be pretty frustrating for me that you’d assume that I like Poe without even asking me or him.”
Kylo opened his mouth to say something – she didn’t like Poe? But she glared at him so harshly that he closed his mouth.
“I’m only going to say this once and you better get it through your thick skull of yours. I like you and only you. I’ve wanted to talk to you about it but I was scared you would leave me. I’ve been trying to drop hints all over the place but you haven’t picked any of them up so I thought maybe you weren’t interested in me.”
Kylo just stood there, trying to process what she was telling him. So her body language, her teasing, her physical contact – that was all for him? His first instinct had been correct?
“I didn’t even realize it when I started liking you,” she said, laughing to herself, looking down. “I was so desperate to have you as a friend that I tried to suppress my feelings for you.”
She looked to her right, now unable to meet his gaze.
“But I couldn’t help it anymore, and I was hopeful you would feel the same way, that you were experiencing the same things I was.”
“I was,” he whispered.
“I’m not done,” she said fiercely, glaring back at him with her piercing hazel eyes.
“Sorry,” he mouthed, which made a glimmer of a smile appear in the corner of her mouth. It quickly faded.
“And then you pushed me away, which really fucking hurt, Kylo. And you wouldn’t tell me why. And we could have avoided this whole mess if you treated me like the good friend I’ve been to you and talked to me. You seriously need to work on that because you’ve been acting like a fucking child.”
Now it was Kylo’s turn to look down, embarrassed.
“So here’s what I’m saying – please don’t stop being my friend. Not ever. I know we haven’t been close that long but I’ve never felt this way about anyone before. And if you want to explore something more the way I do, please just promise me that our friendship will come before any fight or any time either one of us doubts our relationship. Just please let me back in, because I don’t think I could bear it if you weren’t in my life. And I want you. I want you so fucking bad, which I would have told you if you weren’t so difficult.”
She paused to take a deep breath.
“Ok,” she added. “Now I’m done.”
There were a million things he wanted to say. And when Rey and Kylo looked back on this moment for years to come, she never forgave him for it. But it was hard to reconcile the weight and sincerity of her speech with her children’s pajamas. He couldn’t help it when a corner of his mouth twitched upward uncontrollably.
“What are you smiling about?” she asked, looking furious but curious.
“It’s… nothing. Never mind.”
“Fucking tell me.”
“It’s just…” he said, already regretting saying it, “your pajamas.”
She looked at him for a moment, apparently trying to process what he was saying. Then, she looked down at her body, then back up at him. She repeated this process before her mouth contorted.
“ARE BLOODY SERIOUS?!?!?!!?”
She started pounding her fists on his chest. She was quite strong, so it wasn’t insignificant despite his muscle mass and size advantage.
“THE FIRST THING YOU SAY AFTER THAT IS TO MAKE FUN OF MY FUCKING PAJAMAS?!”
He grabbed her wrists, blocking the assault on his chest.
“I’m sorry! I’m sorry!” he exclaimed, trying to calm her down while also smiling at the way she pronounced ‘pajamas’.
She continued her barrage, ripping her arms out of his hands, punching him anywhere she could reach. He could tell she wasn’t genuinely trying to hurt him, she avoided his face and other vulnerable areas, and stuck to battering his meatier areas.
In order to sedate her, he had to use his wide wing span to wrap his arms around her entire body, her arms included. He lifted her off the ground, holding her body against his. She squirmed and kicked and continued to yell at him, but he just kept squeezing her tighter until she stopped. It was a tactic his Uncle Chewie had used on him when he threw a temper tantrum as a child.
Eventually, she gave up. She went limp in his bear-hug, and was breathing hard from her attack in his ear.
“I’m sorry,” Kylo repeated again, more softly, his own mouth dangerously close to her ear.
He just held her for a few moments while her breathing slowed and she calmed down. He could feel her heart beating steadily against his chest, and waited until their heartbeats synced.
“Ok,” she said after a minute, “put me down.”
“What if I don’t want to?” he asked, his voice breaking a little.
She was still for a moment, but then wrapped her dangling legs around his waist. He let her wiggle her arms out of his straight-jacket hold and wrap them around his neck, and he settled his hands under her thighs, making it easier to hold her. She pulled her head back enough to look him in the eye. Then she waited patiently for him to speak.
“I’m sorry for pushing you away,” he started, with a whisper. “I’m too used to doing it. I’m sorry for hurting you. That is the last thing I want to do.”
She nodded, not wanting to interrupt him with words. Her hazel eyes were shining, and locked onto his own deep brown ones.
“It made sense for you to want Poe, you’re so similar. And based on what you said… I just assumed. You’re right. I shouldn’t have assumed anything. I’m sorry.”
She looked hopeful, with an understanding look in her eyes, and he knew she was waiting for the important part.
“I do want you. I knew there was something there the moment I first saw you. But I couldn’t even speak to you your whole first season on staff. That first day I went to the bakery last summer and you were there, it felt like a sign. Like I was supposed to talk to you, like we were supposed to be together. But as the days passed I was too insecure to say anything other than make small talk. Becoming your friend this season is one of the best things to ever happen to me, and I don’t want to stop there.”
Rey moved one hand from behind his neck up to his hair, combing her fingers through it as he spoke. It was calming, and every bit as perfect as Kylo had always imagined it would be. His eyes closed for a moment, letting her tender caress wash over him.
When he opened his eyes again, Rey was smiling at him faintly, completely at odds with the rage she’s expressed just minutes before.
“I went off the deep end there for a while,” he said. “Sorry about that.”
“I forgive you,” she said softly.
She leaned forward, nuzzling her face into his neck, and squeezing him tightly, hugging him from her already perched position around him. He let out a breath, relaxing into her embrace. He hadn’t hugged anyone like this in… well… maybe ever. It felt… nice. It was even nicer when she laid a soft kiss below his jaw, much like the one she had placed on his cheek just days earlier.
She continued her ministrations, doling out easy pecks along his jawline, down his neck, behind his ear. He felt a wet hint of tongue as she licked a line up from the collar of his shirt up to his cheek, and groaned at how it made his stomach bottom out. He stepped forward across the hallway, pushing her back into the wall and sandwiching her against his body. Her legs were still wrapped around his waist, and he felt her squirm in his hands as her center pressed against his abdomen.
He couldn’t wait anymore. He turned his head toward hers, nudging her nose with his. She was quick to respond, capturing his lips with hers. He’d dreamt about this moment, but nothing could compare to the reality of the affection she poured into her kiss. She took her time, gingerly brushing her lips against his, again stroking his head with her small hand. It wasn’t long before she was opening her mouth, inviting him in. He took advantage, finally tasting her, rolling his tongue along the roof of her mouth, sucking on her pretty pink lips. He treasured her little moans and whimpers against his mouth, the way she panted whenever they parted. He tried to say everything he couldn’t speak aloud with his kiss, hoping she would understand. Kissing Rey meant something, something important.
“Kylo,” she said finally, voice raspy and incredibly sexy.
He squeezed her thighs in his hands in response, pulling back to look at her.
She looked happy, peaceful even. The fact he could make someone feel that way astounded him. He wanted to snap a photo of her, saving the moment forever.
She reached a hand up to run her thumb across his kiss-swollen lips. He kissed it, unable to resist.
“What now?” he asked, his own voice gravelly.
“Mm,” she said, kissing his large nose he hated. “I’m tired.”
Kylo laughed. Rey was always honest.
“Wanna get some sleep?”
“Yeah,” she said, yawning. “Sorry.”
“Don’t be,” he said, peeling her off of the wall and carrying her back into his bedroom. “Stay with me tonight,” he said softly, a plea in his tone.
“Of course,” she said earnestly, wrapping her arms around him tighter.
He laid her down on his bed, and she immediately closed her eyes. Poor girl was exhausted. He almost chuckled again at her pajamas.
He peeled off his jeans, keeping his shirt and boxer briefs on. When he climbed into bed, Rey’s arms found his torso, and she wrapped herself around him tightly as he laid on his back. He placed one hand behind his head and used the other to run his fingers along her spine up and down, revering how soothing her hold on him was. Before long, he felt her breathing slow and deepen. His own sleep followed not soon after, and he went under with a smile on his face.
Chapter 19: Work
Rey and Kylo face their first day together.
BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP
Rey felt an arm reach over her and smack the offending alarm.
A few grumbles came from the source, and she felt someone hug her tighter, bringing her chest to his, and a face nuzzle into her neck.
She slowly recalled where she was and who was cuddled beside her.
She smiled, unable to contain the joy that accompanied waking up with Kylo, her best friend.
“Morning,” she mumbled into his shoulder, reaching around him to wrap them together even more closely.
“Mm, morning” he answered into her neck, his own hands cradling her lower back.
Rey sat up abruptly, suddenly stripped out of the comfortable haze.
“What time is it?” she asked in a hoarse voice. She couldn't be late for work.
“Relax, it’s early,” Kylo grumbled, sitting up more slowly.
Kylo had somehow lost his shirt during the night, and Rey was completely transfixed by the sight before her. He had always been broad, far bigger than her, but was now seeing the bare effects of his workout routine up close and personal. He wasn’t shredded, but he was muscular and strong, and so very shirtless.
“I...I…” she stuttered, unable to remember what she was going to say.
“It’s 6,” he answered, looking a bit smug under her stare at his chest.
“I can’t be late for check-in,” she said, covering her eyes under the guise of rubbing them awake but really trying to remain focused on not jumping his bones.
“Let’s just stay home today,” Kylo said in a tempting voice, using a hand to tuck strands of hair that had fallen out of her braid behind her ear.
“We can’t just skip!” she said indignantly.
“We’ll call in sick,” he argued, wrapping his arms around her and pulling her back down onto the bed.
“Kylo,” she groaned, pushing at him.
“Say that again, and add a few moans,” he said while rolling her on top of him.
Rey’s stomach bottomed out at his suggestive words. It was so tempting to strip her pajamas off right then and there, but she’d never been late for work a day in her life, and she wasn’t about to start. Even for Kylo.
She slapped him on the chest, pretending that her hand didn’t linger on his pec after doing so.
“No, no, no. You’re not corrupting me that easily.”
Kylo sighed beneath her, his chest rising and falling under her hand.
“You’re right,” he said, his hands running up and down her thighs, “we can’t have teacher’s pet playing hooky.”
She frowned at him, unappreciative of the dig. She climbed off of him, stretching out a little once she stood. She felt Kylo’s hands reach her shoulders and start gently massaging once he climbed out after her. Every little touch between them was making her want to acquiesce to his plan of skipping more and more.
“I need to get home and get ready before work,” she said, her eyes rolling back into her head as he kneaded at a particularly stubborn knot.
“You’re sure?” he asked lowly.
She had to physically wrench her body out of his reach to refocus.
“Yes,” she said. She walked into the hallway to find her coat she’d thrown on the ground along with the lock picking set she’d used to break in. She couldn’t help but notice the smirk Kylo gave her as she placed the kit in her coat pocket.
“I warned you that I was from Moss Park,” she said, justifying her ownership of a lock pick.
“You did,” he said, smiling.
He followed her to the door as she slipped on her boots. She must look crazy with her pajamas, parka, and snow boots, but she didn’t care. Not when she was so happy.
“Hut today?” she asked.
“Yeah, not sure when my breaks are yet though,” he answered.
“Text me,” she said, standing on her tiptoes to give him a chaste kiss.
Unsatisfied, Kylo grabbed her face and leaned down, planting a wet, sloppy morning kiss on her.
“Mm,” she sighed contentedly, reaching up to run a hand through his hair. “I’ve got to go.”
Kylo was too happy to proceed with his normal workout routine before heading to First Order Mountain. Rey had just left, and his chest felt all… light. And warm.
He mosied back into his bedroom, and fell face first down on the bed, inhaling her light scent on the sheets. He felt like a lovesick teenager. But he didn’t care. For once he had someone. Someone he actually trusted, someone he actually wanted to be around 24/7.
Regardless of how far their relationship would go, Rey made it clear that she would not give up on their friendship. And that was all he could ever dare hope for – someone who cared enough to put the effort in. Poe was a good friend, but Kylo always wondered if they would have become so if they’d met as adults and not been childhood playmates.
He rubbed his hand over the side of the bed she’d been in, as if he could absorb more of her essence by doing so. Nothing appealed to him less at the moment than going to work. He truly hated it. He used to love the mountain, but after the whole fiasco with Snoke, it didn’t call him anymore. He had an two-year diploma in Liberal Arts from the local college, which had satisfied his parents’ wish for a higher education and his love of reading, but that wasn’t the type of degree to get him any better-than-minimum-wage jobs around here. His only passions throughout his life had been books, playing video games with Poe, snowboarding, and now Rey.
Rey was the only thing that made him reluctantly get out of bed and start getting ready. He lumbered into the kitchen to start his coffee pot, deciding he’d just have a slow morning instead of working out. He was too distracted by the events of last night to do anything anyway.
He half wanted to laugh about how stupid he’d been and half wanted to hide in embarrassment. How was he supposed to know that Rey had been trying to Finn and Poe up, not her and Poe.
Kylo thought about it as he listened to the coffee brew. The more he pondered, the more obvious it became, and the more dumb he felt. When he’d suggested Finn and Poe go ice fishing together, Rey looked happy enough to burst, and had looked over at her friend. Then she suggested that all four of them hang out together, which would give the guys an opportunity to get to know each other. She must have been using the time alone with Poe in the Hut in an attempt to hook him up with Finn. When they all came over, Rey sat next to him, leaving the seat next to Poe empty for Finn. She’d probably been texting Poe during the hockey game about Finn.
It all made sense now. Wow did he fuck that one up. He hadn’t even realized Finn was interested in men. The more he thought about it, the more he could see how good of a match Finn and Poe would be. He didn’t know him all that well, but Finn seemed like a fundamentally good guy. He had a similar sense of humor to Poe. He could see them together. Kylo hoped he didn’t mess things up for them. He’d have to apologize to Poe later, both for the totally-not-smooth way he’d screwed up his first time hanging out with Finn and for the way he’d yelled at him and kicked him out afterwards.
He went back into his bedroom to find his phone.
So i owe you a couple of apologizes
He poured himself a cup of coffee and lounged on the couch, waiting to see if Poe would respond. He scarfed down a bagel – store-bought, not from the bakery. He only went to the bakery in the summer when Rey was working.
Kylo sputtered into his coffee with a laugh. Calling him names was Poe’s way of forgiving him.
Why didn’t you tell me Rey liked me??
wasn’t my thing to tell. thought you might notice with all of her incessant flirting. so i take it she managed to reach you last night?
Yeah. broke into my apartment and everything
that’s our girl. things worked out?
He wasn’t comfortable enough to tell him things over text, he’d have to talk with him in person later. Despite refusing all prior attempts, he’d take Poe’s relationship advice in this case even if it meant embarrassing himself a bit to do it.
Hope i didn’t fuck things up for you and Finn
u didn’t. we’re going out later this week
Good. you working today?
yeah. you’re buying me lunch. real lunch in the cafeteria
His weird friendship with Poe was easy. He did something stupid, Poe forgave him, he’d buy him a drink. They’d move on. They were both a bit hard-headed, so they were able to get away with being dicks to each other now and then without offending the other person too badly. Poe had other friends that Kylo didn’t particularly care for, but Poe never tried to get him to do things he didn’t like or be around people that annoyed him. He was the only person besides Rey who just accepted him as is.
He leaned back into the couch, wondering how he got so lucky to have Poe and Rey. Especially Rey. A literal burst of sunshine who was legitimately hardcore, not just dark and angsty like him. It seemed like his life was finally something worth enjoying. He even felt good enough to think about the future and that type of shit. It was a weird feeling.
Rey’s cheeks hurt from smiling all morning. She was afraid she’d scare her students with the intensity of her bright mood. Thankfully it only seemed to help, as she got generous tips from both of her morning private lessons. She felt unstoppable. There were no misunderstandings in the way between her and Kylo now. They’d laid their hands on the table.
She chuckled to herself, thinking about how ridiculous she must have looked when he’d opened his bedroom door to her in children’s pajamas and winter coat, lock pick in her hand. Kylo would have to put up with all of her craziness if he really wanted her.
She took a seat on a bench after reaching the locker room and pulled out her phone.
To Kylo Ren
Just got off. lunch?
She took off her helmet and gaiter, very ready for a break.
Actually Poe and I just finished lunch. I have to head back out. Any other breaks today?
To Kylo Ren
yeah i think i have one at 3
i’ll switch shifts with someone and get a break then too. meet me at the Hut
Rey smiled, biting her lip. Was it unhealthy to want to spend every minute with him?
“Well what’s got you in a good mood, Rey?”
Rey’s smiled faded, and she closed her eyes, absolutely dreading having to speak to none other than Armitage Hux, who appeared to also be on a break, based on his presence in the locker room.
“Nothing,” she said plainly, hoping one-word answers would shorten their conversation. Knowing Hux, it wouldn’t work.
“Texting someone special?” he asked as he slimed his way across the floor toward her.
“Yes,” she said honestly.
“And who might that be?”
“And why should I tell you?”
Hux scoffed. “Well how else are we to judge if he’s good enough for you?”
Rey had to keep back the bile threatening to be puked up out of her.
“And what would you know about my standards?”
“I know enough,” he said, with a horrid smile, sitting down on the bench far too close to her. “For instance, I’m glad to see Kylo hasn’t been chasing your skirt recently, I’ve barely seen him in the locker room at all. Good riddance.”
Rey wanted to swing her arm across her and punch Hux square in the nose, but the employee handbook probably forbade it.
“What’s your problem with Kylo?” she asked instead, wanting to hear Hux attempt to justify himself.
He laughed again, one of those evil snickers like the villains have in the movies.
“He’s a waste of space,” he said grandly, as if Rey was going to believe what he said. “He turned his back on this resort, on Mr. Snoke. All because he wasn’t willing to put in the work anymore. It’s no wonder he doesn’t have any friends, those he had he stabbed in the back.”
Rey stood up at this, no longer patient enough to play along.
“That’s where you’re wrong, Hux,” she said forcefully, pointing a finger at him. “He has friends. In fact he’s my best friend. And nothing you say will change that, and I hope you’ll save yourself the embarrassment of trying.”
Hux looked shocked for a moment before his face contorted into an ugly grimace.
“I would advise you to not finish that statement, Mr. Hux,” Luke said suddenly, stepping out of the open door of his office right off of the locker room. He looked angrier than Rey had ever seen him. Normally he was extremely chill, but at the moment he looked ready to take on an entire army by himself.
“Luke, I… I wasn’t…” Hux stuttered, shrinking in his seat.
“That’s enough,” he said sternly. “Rey, if you’ll please join me in my office.”
Rey nodded, afraid to speak around this new version of Luke. She’d never seen him like this before.
Luke turned and went back into his office. She threw the nastiest glare she could at Hux before following him.
“Please close the door,” Luke said as he sat behind his desk.
Rey obliged and took the seat across the desk.
“Now, would you like a cup of tea?” Luke asked, suddenly back to his normal, lightly smiling self.
“What?” she asked, taken aback by the sudden transformation.
“Tea. Green or black?” he said, gesturing toward his electric kettle.
“Oh. Black, please.”
She watched him switch on the kettle and pull two mugs out of a drawer of his desk, placing a black tea bag in one and a green in the other.
She sat silently, unsure of what to say.
“Now,” he said, smiling at her, “what can I do to help you keep from ripping Mr. Hux’s smug little face off of his body?”
Her jaw dropped. She’d never heard Luke ever insult someone so blatantly.
“Oh come now,” he said, winking at her. “We both know you’re not the one instigating things. So tell me, is there anything I can do to help?”
“Oh,” she said, still surprised by the sudden turn of events. “Well, I’m not sure. He’s just always lurking around, it’s like he’s waiting to annoy me, or to say something shitty about Kylo.”
“Hmm…” Luke said, tapping his chin. “Maybe there’s a way to put some space between you two. I’ll have to think about it.”
The electric kettle automatically turned off, and Luke poured the hot water into the mugs, passing the one with the black tea bag to Rey.
“Thank you,” she said. “For the tea and for the… help.”
“No problem,” Luke said cheerily, “if I could fire that git, I would have long ago. Unfortunately Mr. Snoke won’t let me.”
“So you know about all the… stuff?” Rey asked cryptically, unsure of how much Luke knew about Snoke’s crooked dealings. Kylo had told her that his family knew about his past and what Snoke made him do, but she didn’t want to reveal anything by mistake.
“Oh, Snoke? Of course I do. I’ve been trying to help Leia take him down for years. The whole reason I took this job in the first place was to get a man on the inside. We never thought Ben would head down the path he did, but it turns out that it ended up helping us, with all the intel and whatnot. Snoke’s been careful lately, but we’re hoping he’ll slip up soon.”
Luke spoke casually, putting his feet up on his desk, as if he wasn’t talking about his boss’s crimes. Rey raised her eyebrows at his honesty.
“Anyway,” he said, his kind eyes smiling at her. “How’s Ben? Haven’t seen him since Thanksgiving.”
“He’s… good,” she said, blushing. She raised her mug to take a sip, trying to mask anything in her expression that might reveal she’d slept in his bed the night before.
“Is he treating you well?”
“Good, good,” he said, nodding thoughtfully.
“I…” Rey started. She didn’t want to talk about Kylo behind his back, but Luke was an invested party in his well-being, and had the resources to help. “I don’t think he’s very happy working here.”
“Hm, I would suppose not,” Luke agreed. “Not sure why he still does, after everything he went through with Snoke. I think he’s a bit stuck.”
“Should I encourage him to find another job?” she asked honestly. She didn’t want to be pushy, and she knew Kylo was not one to take orders or even suggestions very well.
“Maybe he’ll listen if it comes from you,” Luke answered, giving her a knowing glance.
Rey had a feeling she wouldn’t need to verbally explain to Luke what was going on between her and his nephew.
“Maybe,” she said quietly.
She placed her empty mug back on his desk.
“I need to grab some food before my break is over. Can I get you anything?” she asked.
“Oh, no. I’m fine. Thank you for asking, sorry for keeping you from your lunch break. I’ll keep you updated on my ideas for Mr. Hux.”
“Thanks again for that,” she said, standing up.
“Say hi to Ben for me,” he responded as she left his office. She gave him a brief smile.
Thankfully, Hux was gone from the locker room, there were just a few other instructors eating their lunches. Rey grabbed her own out of her locker and put her tupperware container in the microwave.
“Hey, girl,” she heard Finn say as he entered the locker room. “You on lunch break?”
“Yup,” she said, pointing to the microwave.
“Great,” he said, “let’s eat. You need to give me all the juicy details about you and Tall, Dark, and Emo.”
“Only if you tell me about you and Poe!”
Chapter 20: The Hut
Rey and Kylo meet up in the Hut, then Kylo gets some advice from dear old dad.
Whereas Kylo had been modest with his touches when they were ‘just friends’, he certainly wasn’t shy anymore.
Rey gasped as he pulled her heavy coat off of her and lifted her up onto the elevated countertop in the Hut. It was all a bit ridiculous, what with her heavy ski boots dangling under her, occasionally whacking Kylo painfully in the shins, their bulky snowpants and numerous layers of clothing between them. But they were making it work, their newfound intimacy simply irresistible.
Kylo pawed at her chest over her thick sweatshirt, eventually slipping his hand underneath where only one tight thermal shirt and a sports bra separated their skin. Their mouths were meeting in a fierce battle, tongues and teeth everywhere, each desperate to taste the other.
“Didn’t Poe say something about no fooling around in the Hut?” Rey found the sense to ask at some point while making out.
“Do you want me to stop?” Kylo asked in return, gently biting her earlobe.
“God, no,” she answered, running her hands up and down his chest through his clothes. She considered stripping them off of him, but it was rather cold in the unheated, poorly insulated Hut. A normal person would laugh at the idea of getting naked there, but it was the only thing on Rey’s mind. How she’d managed to drag herself away from his bed that morning was beyond her, because the moment they met up at 3:00pm outside the Hut she’d grabbed his hand and yanked him inside, throwing her helmet and gear to the ground before pouncing on him.
She couldn’t do much from her position sitting on the counter. She couldn’t wrap her legs around him – her ski boots were too heavy and clunky. Their clothes prevented pretty much any skin to skin contact. But the sounds he was making as he devoured her mouth were desperately turning her on. Her recent dry spell wasn’t helping, her body wanted Kylo recklessly. Her hands wandered up his chest and around his neck, holding him close.
He pulled back a moment to catch his breath, and the smile he gave her floored her. There was so much open, honest tenderness in it – she’d never seen it on him before. She cradled his face and ran her thumb across his soft bottom lip, then along his nose, then over his eyebrow. She was committing his face to memory, something beautiful to look back on.
“What are you thinking about?” he breathed, searching her eyes with his.
“Just you,” she said, smiling softly.
“I think about you all the time,” he admitted as she ran her thumbs down the shells of his ears.
His own hands were on her waist, where he’d pushed up several of her layers. He was softly rubbing the skin there, and his warm hands were everything she’d imagined.
She leaned forward to kiss the corner of his mouth.
“I think you’re going soft, Kylo Ren,” she teased him, referring to his sweet, subdued demeanor with her.
“Am I?” he asked with a half-smile.
“I kind of miss the angst,” she said with a chuckle. “The dangerous bad boy.”
“You want danger?” he purred, bending forward, making Rey lean away until her back hit the wall.
She nodded furiously, biting her lip. She was so turned on.
He looked right in her eyes as one hand migrated from her waist to the front of her snow pants. Thankfully, they just had a single button and a zipper, and he was able to dispatch them quickly. Rey’s breath hitched as his hand snuck into her leggings underneath.
“No underwear?” he asked, raising his eyebrows.
She could only shake her head, her voice wasn’t functioning.
Kylo grinned sinfully as his fingers delved lower, brushing against her folds. Rey gave a little whimper, and Kylo chuckled deliciously. She knew she was probably soaking wet.
“You can scream as loud as you want to in here, no one will hear you,” Kylo said lowly, bringing one hand up to grab her chin.
Rey beamed, ecstatic to have brought back a dark version of Kylo.
“You’re a monster.”
“Yes, I am.”
His fingers entered her, her slickness welcoming him. He wasted no time, slipping one finger up into her channel, caressing her walls. Rey couldn’t help it, her breath instantly became heavy, she was so aroused she felt like exploding. Touching herself had brought her no mental relief from the dreams she’d had of Kylo doing this to her. She felt his thumb find her clit, expertly pushing the hood back. The pure, direct contact made her nearly convulse with the shiver it sent up her entire body. She was wired, and her indecent moans filled the Hut.
“Poe’s going to kill us,” he chuckled, touching his nose to hers.
“Please don’t talk about Poe right now,” she whined, grabbing at his hair.
Kylo growled fiercely, seemingly reminded of his prior jealous resentment.
“My name will be the one you scream,” he told her authoritatively.
“Yes,” she agreed breathily, kissing at his cheek, then his mouth as he fingered her fiercely.
Before long, he slipped a second finger into her, the added pressure making her cunt twitch around him.
“Fuck, Kylo,” she moaned, rocking her hips against his hand.
“Every day,” he rumbled, “I’ll please you every fucking day, Rey.”
Rey basked in his keen, wicked confidence. She loved when he was gentle with her, loving and affectionate. Seeing him open up to her and discovering the kindness that laid beneath the thorns had captured her heart. But she’d first been attracted to his dark side, the risky mystery that he exuded. They’d have time for both, the tenderness would have its moment. But right now, after going over a year without sex, she needed him rough, domineering. She needed him to take her.
She leaned forward to teeth at his neck, egging him on. She wanted to mark him where everyone would see that he belonged to someone. She aimed high, right by his jaw.
“Shit,” he cursed, his fingers fumbling for a moment before finding his rhythm again.
She was so tightly wound that it didn’t take long before she started becoming undone. She couldn’t even kiss him anymore, all she could do was lean her head back against the clouded window behind her and let him hit every spot that unravelled her. He breathed into her neck, whispering filthy obscenities into her ear.
So tight Rey, fuck…
Your pussy was made for me...
We should have done this ages ago...
Rey couldn’t take it anymore, his deep voice and his brazen resolve seeped into her, making her come hard around his fingers, clamping down tight. Her eyes rolled back as the air around her exploded with energy, her nails digging deep into Kylo’s neck. She was vaguely able to recognize her own voice shouting his name as promised. She felt him smile against the skin of her neck, sending a magnanimous current down her body, all the way down to her toes.
It took awhile for her to come back down from her release. She let Kylo finger her all the way through it, grabbing his wrist when she was done and too sensitive. She watched as he brought the hand she was holding up to his mouth and licked his fingers, tasting her. The sight sent another jolt through her, right down to her wet, hot core. She wondered if he liked the taste of her, and if he would want to explore her with his mouth next time. Her dreams had been haunted by the sight of his head between her thighs for weeks.
When he was done, he leaned forward and kissed her deeply, and the unfamiliar flavor of her own tang hit her tongue. She grabbed his face, expressing wordlessly her thanks for the way he made her body feel. The heat between them was impossible to deny. How they’d kept their hands to themselves for this long was a mystery.
“You’re amazing,” he said sincerely after a few breaths.
She was amazing? All she’d done was sit there… he was the one with the magic touch. She laughed.
“What?” he asked, smiling.
“Being amazing is pretty easy if all I have to do is let you make me cum,” she answered, watching him swallow thickly at her words.
One of her hands wandered down from his next to his chest, then down his strong abdomen to brush his erection through his two layers of pants. She felt him exhale abruptly at her touch.
“Damnit,” he muttered, grabbing her wrist suddenly.
“What?” she asked, afraid she’d accidentally or something.
“My break is over, I’m already late,” he said, frowning fiercely up at the clock hanging on the wall above her head.
“But you… you’re…”
“I’m fine,” he said, giving her a brief kiss. “We’ll continue this later,” he said with a cheeky grin.
She leaned back against the window as she watched him leave, still feeling boneless from her orgasm. She brought her fingers up to her mouth and felt how swollen they were, and smiled.
Kylo hopped out of his shower, rushing as fast as he could so he could go over to Rey’s house. She’d invited him over for dinner after work. Every second spent away from her was a wasted one. He’d barely pulled some clothes on before someone knocked at his front door.
KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK
“Ben, it’s me.”
Kylo opened up the door to see his father standing there with a box.
“Hey kid, how’s it going?” he asked in his normal Solo way, walking right in.
“What are you doing here?” Kylo asked, a bit befuddled. His parents rarely came to his apartment, especially unannounced.
“Rey mentioned she didn’t have as many tools as she used to. I cleaned up the shop a bit and pulled together some of the crap we don’t use. Thought maybe she’d want to pick it over before I scrap it,” he said, placing the crate down with a loud thud on the kitchen counter. “I was hoping you could give these to her.”
“Oh, uh, yeah. She’d like that. I can take it to her tonight,” Kylo said, pulling his boots on. Hopefully Han would take the hint and leave too.
“You’re seeing her tonight?” Han asked, turning toward his son with a mischievous half-smile.
“Yeah, we’re going to have dinner.”
“Uh huh,” Han said, rolling his tongue in his mouth.
“I’m sure she’ll like the tools.”
“Sure, sure,” Han said, scraping his upper lip with his lower teeth. Kylo knew the move all too well.
“Alright, spit it out,” he said, giving his dad a knowing look.
“I don’t know, kid,” Han said, turning away and strolling into the living room. “Just wondering what your plan is here.”
“Yeah, your Rey plan.”
“Look,” his father said, plopping himself down on the couch and getting comfortable. “Do you know what you’re doing with Rey? I mean… she’s end game, right?”
“Yeah, I mean this isn’t like the other girls you’ve dated. She’s the real deal, right?”
Kylo paused. He’d never thought about it before, what made her so different from other girls he’d been with. He supposed it was because they were actually friends, that they had a deep connection besides anything they had between them physically. That he wanted to spend every minute with her, and would do anything to make her happy.
Oh. End game.
“Uh, yeah. Yes. Yes,” he stuttered.
“I thought so,” Han said smugly, parking his feet on top of the coffee table confidently.
Kylo walked into the living room to sit on the other couch, suddenly intrigued by whatever his father was thinking.
“I need a plan?” he asked his dad.
“Things will go a lot more smoothly if you do,” he answered. “Trust me, I know because I didn’t have one when I first tried to get with your mom.”
Kylo reflected on all of the stories his mom would tell of how hopeless his dad had been when they were first dating.
“Thankfully,” Han continued, “you’re a lot better than I was at your age at not being a smartass. At least to women.”
Kylo didn’t know what to do with the half-compliment.
“Let me just give you some advice.”
“This isn’t the sex talk again, is it?” he joked.
“Shut up. This is real, kid. Number one. Make sure you communicate. When I first met your mom I thought she was into Luke because she said she loved him. That was before I knew he was her brother. If I had just asked her about him it would have saved me a lot of grief.”
Kylo winced. “Yeah, about that... I may have already done something similar.”
“Jesus, kid, you’re more like me than I thought,” Han muttered rubbing his forehead. “Ok, well, I hope you learned your lesson. Number two. You have to at least try to be the type of person she deserves. I had to make some pretty serious changes to earn your mom’s trust.”
Kylo’s stomach roiled. He’d been pretty shitty to a lot of people in his life. He suddenly felt unclean, like he didn’t deserve to touch Rey the way he did. He scowled, was this advice supposed to be helping? It was just making him feel like crap.
“Number three,” Han continued. “Let her lead. I know you’ve always been independent. Hell, you barely let your mom and I parent you. But if you really want to be with someone, you have to give over the control once in a while.”
“Once in a while?” Kylo smirked. His mom infamously held his dad on a very short leash.
“Well your mom is always right and I’m always wrong so we’re an exception.”
“I’m just saying,” Han said, rubbing his chin thoughtfully, “I know you don’t trust people very easily, but you might have to let her take over now and then.”
It all sounded, reasonable, which was the worst part. He hated admitting it when his dad was right. All of a sudden it hit him.
“How did you even know we were together?” he asked suddenly. They’d technically been together for less than a day.
“Well we all knew she was into you big time at Thanksgiving. We took bets on how long it would take you to get your shit together and notice.”
“Your Uncle Chewie thought it would take a whole month. Your mom was the closest, she always bets in your favor. We were all pretty shocked it only took a few days. Poe texted us this morning.”
“Is my life some sort of spectator sport for you all??!?!!?!”
“I mean,” Han said, shrugging, “you are the only kid. It’s been pretty fun trying to predict your life.”
“Oh my god.”
“Don’t be so dramatic. Maz is the one that started it, anyway. She bet us you’d be potty trained before 2. And goddamnit, she was right!”
“This is not happening,” Kylo murmured, covering his face with his hands, hoping he was in a nightmare.
“You need to loosen up, kid.”
“I swear to god if you make any more bets about me and Rey I’m never coming home again.”
“But the rest of your life is still up for grabs?” Han asked seriously, pulling out his phone.
“I hate you.”
“Don’t hate the players, hate the game. Besides, this is how we paid for your community college. Your mom won big against Lando when you ended up going to prom.”
“She literally forced me to go.”
“Don’t tell Lando that,” Han muttered, texting furiously on his phone.
“Are you talking to them right now!?” Kylo exclaimed.
“No,” he said, not even bothering to put on a poker face. Han was an excellent liar when he wanted to be, but he wasn’t even trying.
“This isn’t funny.”
“Maybe not to you, but us old folks need some entertainment.”
“Did you have any other real advice or can you leave?”
“I guess we can leave it at that for now,” Han said, pocketing his phone and standing up from the couch. “I’m sure you’ll figure the rest out when the time comes.”
“You sound like Uncle Yoda.”
“That old goon is rolling in his grave hearing you compare me to him,” Han chuckled, shucking his coat back on and heading toward the door. “Tell Rey I say hi.”
Kylo closed the door forcefully behind him and banged his head on it a few times for good measure.
So if you've read either of my other fics, you know that I'm super awkward writing sexy times. Sooooo yeah I know it's not the best in the world lol. But I'm trying I guess haha.
Anyway, thank you all so much for all of the lovely support thus far. I'm having a blast with this and love engaging with fellow Reylo people =]
Chapter 21: Bedroom
Kylo and Rey spend the night together.
Hi all, I'm SO sorry for the delay on this chapter. I actually have the rest of the fic mostly written out, I spend time editing before I release each chapter. I just got completely overtaken by work this past week, so I was unable to edit and post.
I don't anticipate this long of a wait for any of the remaining chapters.
Thanks for your patience and your ever-encouraging support!
The wind howled around her house, but it was cozy by the fireplace. They were sitting on the rug by the fire, sipping on after-dinner tea. Rey knew that Kylo wasn’t normally a tea person, but he drank it whenever she offered it. He leaned back against the couch, and she sat between his legs, resting her back against his chest, head on his shoulder. He’d occasionally place a gentle kiss against the side of her head, or nuzzle her neck with his nose. They didn’t say much, they didn’t need to. They just enjoyed watching the fire together, listening to the gentle crackling of the wood Kylo had brought over for her, the occasional pop of an ember igniting. It was easy this way, enjoying each other in silence. So much of their time had been spent talking, but neither of them were naturally social creatures. She’d grown up alone, and he preferred to be so. Quiet to them wasn’t awkward, it was peaceful.
She drew lazy patterns onto the back of his hand that was sitting in her lap with her thumb. His hands were one of her favorite parts of him, and not just for the much-needed release they had brought her earlier in the day. They promised safety, intimacy, and yielded an axe remarkably well. She traced each knuckle, and each vein. Eventually, she gently grabbed it, bringing it up to her face lay a kiss on his palm. She felt him shudder behind her. She loved the feeling of his firm body behind her, his arm encasing her. This was the companionship she never really knew existed in real life.
“Rey,” Kylo murmured behind her, his deep vibrations rattling against her back.
“Yes?” she asked, her voice cracking slightly from the lack of use in the past hour.
“Can I stay with you tonight? Just stay?”
“Of course,” she said with no hesitation. She didn’t want him and his warmth going anywhere. He was her best friend. It had only been a month, but she had opened up more to him than she ever had to anyone. She thought about that night they’d been on locker room cleanup duty together at the beginning of the season, and how attracted she’d been to him after watching him prance around town in his lumberjack gear all summer.
So much had changed since then. 24 hours ago, she was nearly crying in his kitchen, with Finn calming her down. Now, she was settled into his embrace, feeling on top of the world. Now that there was nothing in between them, he made his feelings clear, and it made her tingle in excitement.
“Kylo?” she asked.
“Remember when you grabbed my boob that night you gave me a ride home when my car broke down?”
He laughed, chest bumping into the back of her head.
“Yeah,” he said, “my bad.”
“Was that on purpose?”
“No!” he said quickly. “I thought I was touching your shoulder, I swear. You were wrapped up in that blanket and it was hard to tell...”
She giggled at his earnestness.
“I believe you,” she said, turning her head to give him a smile.
“Did you like it?” he asked softly, now with a playful smirk. He brought the hand she was holding up to her chest, cupping a breast and giving it a gentle squeeze.
Rey swallowed thickly around her now dry throat.
“Yes,” she admitted quietly, keeping her own hand on his, encouraging him to keep it on her chest, right on her heart.
“Mmm. It kept me up awake that whole night,” he whispered against her ear, making her erupt in shivers.
“My boob or how awkward you were?” she joked.
“Both,” he chuckled.
She was only wearing a thin bralette under her shirt, and she knew he could feel her nipple through it as his thumb stroked her breast. She bit her lip, marveling at how a simple touch from him could ignite her entire body.
She felt confident in his hold, bold even. She placed her mug down and sat up, instantly hating how cold it felt not being nestled into Kylo’s body. She spun around instead and straddled his lap, folding her legs on the ground and sitting on his thighs. He put his own mug down, and brought his legs together a bit, making it more comfortable for her.
She placed her hands gently on his chest and leaned in to kiss him. She was soft, placing light kisses on his plush lips, trying to give him all the affection she knew he craved.
His hands ran slowly up and down her body, from her thighs to her waist, up the sides of her ribcage, and back down, as if committing her curves to tactile memory. A hand eventually slipped up the back of her shirt, and his warm touch caressed up and down her spine. He kissed her back gently, so softly. They were in no rush now.
Rey buried her fingers into Kylo’s hair, combing through it and rubbing the back of his neck. He purred at the sensation, deep in his throat.
“Rey,” he moaned deeply. Her name sounded like heaven on his tongue.
When she shifted in his lap, she felt the length of him through his jeans, slightly hard. She squirmed again, to see if she could tease him as she mouthed at his jaw.
She felt his hands tighten around her waist, pulling her down harder onto him. She couldn’t tell if he was doing it on purpose or if his body had taken control. Regardless, she let out a gasp as his dick brushed against her center through her thin leggings. Kylo had become… intimately acquainted with her in the Hut, but she had yet to encounter his manhood up close and personal. And suddenly, it was all she craved.
She reached a hand down to his jeans. Thankfully, he wasn't wearing a belt. She fumbled for a moment before finding the button and dislodging it. Kylo seemed to notice what she was doing and grabbed her wrist before she could reach for his zipper.
She looked into his eyes, confused.
“Are you sure?” he asked, rubbing her wrist as he held it, a gentle fire burning behind his gaze.
She nearly laughed at him. She was reaching for his dick and he asked if she was sure.
“Positive,” she said firmly, smiling.
He gave her one of his handsome half-smiles and released her wrist. She immediately got to work on unzipping his jeans and finding his erection with her hand. She heard his breath hitch when she wrapped around it through his boxer briefs.
“Aren’t you glad you get this in front of a cozy fire rather than in the cold Hut?” she asked with a sly smile.
He chuckled breathily, then gasped again when she slipped her hand inside his briefs to find his head and run her thumb over it.
“Fuck,” he muttered, throwing his head back against the couch. He kept one hand on her waist while he used the other to cover his eyes.
Rey was already frustrated by the lack of access she had due to his pants, so she climbed off of him, determined to strip them off. He let her tug at them for a moment before he realized what she was doing and helped her relieve him of them. Then she stood, leaving Kylo sitting on the ground staring at her in confusion.
She took a deep breath to invigorate her confidence, then peeled off her leggings, leaving her in simple cotton black panties. She wasn’t afraid to take things into her own hands. She kneeled back down on the ground and stripped off her shirt. She was sure her nipples were showing through her bralette, they were rock hard. She watched Kylo as his eyes roamed her body for the first time, and the glint in his eyes made her even more aroused.
After a moment, he began to reach for her. She let him pull her to him, settling on her hands and knees as he held her face and kissed her soundly. When he pulled back, they looked at each other earnestly.
“Take me upstairs,” she whispered, staring at his lips.
Kylo was quick to stand up, pulling Rey up with him. To her surprise, he swiped her legs out from under her and held her in a bridal carry while ascending the stairs. He didn’t even struggle to carry her, and the thought made her stomach do somersaults.
“That one,” she murmured, using her head to point to her bedroom once they were upstairs. It was the only room with any furniture in it. She was a little ashamed at how sparse it was – there was a bed, a dresser, and one mirror hanging, but the rest was empty save for a few boxes. She didn’t have any keepsakes, nothing a family would give her. Nothing.
Kylo didn’t seem to notice as he laid her down on her bed and flicked on the solitary, dim lamp and climbed on top of her. His weight on her body was a comforting embrace, his kisses little blessings on her skin. He was still wearing his shirt, so she tugged on it until he helped her take it off. They were both down to their skivvies, and the skin-to-skin contact was electrifying.
“So good,” he muttered, seeming to appreciate the sensation as much as her.
Rey moaned when he aligned his hips with hers and ground his erection into her folds through their underwear. After a few moments of rocking together, Kylo pushed himself up to kneel on his knees and start tugging on her panties. She lifted her bottom up to help him slide them down her legs. He smirked at her when he tossed them behind him. She returned his smirk and pushed herself up and forward to mouth at his erection through the fabric of his briefs. Kylo hissed, gently bringing a hand into her hair to grasp it. She’d already felt the real thing with her hand, so she quickly grew impatient with the barrier. She pulled his briefs down quickly, accidentally snagging them on his erection. She muttered an apology as she maneuvered them around it and down his legs. He stood up off the bed for a moment to fully remove them himself. She found herself gaping at the size of his dick, anxiously swallowing. It was bigger than any she’d had before. He caught her stare and gave himself a few pumps to bring his cock to full attention, pointing towards her.
“Do you want me, Rey?” he asked seriously, eyes roaming her body again as he kept himself in hand.
“Yes,” she said quickly, with no further thought needed.
“But,” she said, after a moment, “go slow… it’s… it’s been a while,” she admitted.
Kylo nodded at her sincerely. She looked over to her dresser, which had a box of condoms laying on top of it. She’d bought them especially for Kylo. He followed her gaze, and helped himself to one, ripping open the foil and rolling the condom onto his hard cock.
Without further ado, he reapproached the bed where she was sitting. He reached behind her to unclasp her bralette, placing light kisses on her shoulder as he pulled the straps down and peeled the garment off of her. She gasped when his hands cupped her bare breasts. She felt her nipples ache in anticipation.
Kylo slowly climbed on top of her again, being careful to not smother her. He kissed up her shoulder to her neck, ascending until he reached her lips. He brushed her lips with his own for a moment before putting three fingers up to her mouth. She dutifully sucked on them before he pulled them out, sneaking them down to her core. One of his fingers quickly found her clit, while another slid its way into her channel, much as he had done earlier in the Hut. She felt herself getting wetter and wetter has he coaxed her into pleasurable oblivion. It was her turn to whisper in his ear, and she left no doubts as to her attraction to him as he sent her over the edge with his fingers.
As she was recovering from her orgasm, she was barely able to discern Kylo using the fluid on his hand from her release to coat his condom-wrapped erection. The sight of his large length made her stomach bottom out in anticipation and excitement.
He leaned back over her, suspending himself just above her, lightly resting his body against hers. She could feel him nudge her folds with his tip, and she was so sensitive that it made her hips buck up with a jolt. He chuckled at her before asking for her consent.
“Rey… are you… can I…”
“Yes, now,” she encouraged him, reaching around him to dig her nails into his firm behind.
He sharply exhaled as she pulled him in, his thick cock parting her folds and slipping inside. Thankfully, she was slick enough, though the stretch from his broadness made her whimper in discomfort. It had been a while, and he was her largest by far. Rey felt Kylo still over her, letting her adjust to his size. She wrapped her legs around his hips and experimentally flexed her walls, making him groan.
“Go, slow,” she commanded simply, ready for him to move.
He began pumping slowly in and out of her. Bit by bit, her discomfort faded into ecstasy, the full feeling of him inside of her setting her ablaze once again. Just when she thought she couldn’t take anymore, he finally pushed in deep to the hilt. They groaned together, overwhelmed by the perfect fit. She could feel him shaking above her, and kissed him on the cheek for his patience, holding his head beside hers.
“I’m fine, go,” she purred into his ear before licking the shell of it.
He wasted no time, pushing harder, building up a punishing pace. She hung on to the back of his neck as he leaned his head up to meet her eyes. His pupils were completely blown out, and there was a hurricane of passion swirling in his dark irises.
“Rey,” he moaned, “you… you’re perfect.”
“I’ve wanted you so badly,” she said, her voice raspy and breathy.
Her words seemed to stroke his ego, for he slowed his rapid, desperate pace to a deliberate, rolling rhythm that hit places so deep within Rey that she didn’t even know they existed. She threw her head back with a sharp shriek, hitting her skull hard against the headboard.
“Yes, scream for me,” she heard him say from above her before she felt his tongue on her neck.
His words only added more fuel to her fire – her toes curled tightly and her hands leaving his neck to drag her nails up his back as he fucked her hard into the mattress. They took turns mouthing at each other’s pulse points, sucking on each other’s lips. Rey gripped him as hard as she could with her body, seeking an impossible friction. Before long, she felt an impending sense of internal combustion.
“Kylo,” she wailed, “I’m close. Please.”
Her fervent pleas fortified his resolve, his muscles shaking with the effort required for his relentless tempo.
“Look at me,” he ordered her. She locked her eyes onto his as best she could, nearly gasping at the fire behind them.
All it took was a growl from him and a particularly brutal thrust to spark her release. She felt every cell within her vibrate with pure energy as her orgasm shook her violently. She pulled at Kylo’s hair as she felt herself clamp down on his hard length inside of her, the untamed euphoria almost too much to bear.
Kylo chanted her name as he came with her, driving into her several more times before collapsing on top of her.
Rey’s senses returned slowly. She basked in his heavy, comforting weight on top of her, in the sound of his heavy breath in her ear, in the soft touch of the skin of his neck in her hands, in the lustrous black locks of hair now obscuring her eyesight. She breathed in deeply, inhaling Kylo’s scent. It was sweaty, and musty, and perfect. She felt when he came back to himself, and pulled himself out of her. She missed his essence when he stood to peel off the condom, tossing it into the rubbish bin before rejoining her on the bed. He curled tightly around her, holding her in the closest way he could, pulling the sheets and blanket up over them.
For the first time, Rey felt like she had made love, which was the last thing she would have expected from Kylo when she first met him. But here they were, wrapped up in a decidedly tender embrace that only lovers would share. She reached a hand up from between them to comb through his hair, pushing it back away from his face. She pulled back to catch his half-hooded eyes watching her. She smiled at him, and the grin he gave her back made a warm pop burst in her heart. She loved every side of him – the bad boy, the gentle giant, the bookworm, the snarky liftie. She had to tell him.
“Kylo,” she whispered.
Their faces were so close their noses were nearly touching.
“Rey,” he said lowly, contentedly, peacefully.
“I love you,” she said, sure of it.
His formerly sleepy eyes widened quickly in response.
“Really?” he asked disbelievingly, his voice higher.
She kissed his nose, her new favorite way of showing him affection.
“Yes,” she said plainly.
He looked at her for a moment in awe.
“I… I love you too,” he stammered awkwardly.
He laughed, which startled her due to how close they were.
“I know that didn’t sound convincing,” he said with a smile, “but I mean it. I love you, Rey.”
She laughed too, loving the way that even his confession of love was ungraceful.
“Good,” she said, snuggling into his chest.
They laid there for a while, Rey breathing into Kylo’s chest as he traced his fingers up and down her back. Before she could stop them, the voices and anxieties and Rey’s head reared their ugly heads. She’d never loved someone like this before, and thus had never had so much to lose. Her happiness now rested entirely in someone else’s hands, and the powerlessness of it terrified her.
“Kylo?” she mumbled, needing to confide in her best friend.
“Mm?” he asked.
“Please don’t leave me,” she said meekly.
He didn’t respond for a moment, and Rey realized he must be processing her request. She felt him stiffen, but then hold her to him even tighter.
“I won’t. Ever,” he said sternly, so confidently that she believed him for a moment.
She couldn’t say anything. She tried to will away the demons in her heart, trying her best to focus on her very real present with Kylo. It felt so good to be in his arms, and she somehow knew that he would never intentionally hurt her. These thoughts helped her relax into his embrace. She comforted herself with the beat of his heart in his chest, with the everlasting heat he always exuded, now warming her bed. She could deal with the here and now, and take each day as it came. All she knew was that she wanted each day to have a bit of Kylo in it.
Chapter 22: Shower
Kylo woke up first, happily taking in his surroundings as Rey’s bedroom. With a quick glance over at the clock, he realized his body must have woken him at his normal alarm time. They’d somehow changed positions during the night, Rey was no longer snuggled into his chest. Now he was curled around her back with an arm thrown over her. He didn’t want to disturb her, and he rather liked being entangled with her anyway, so he laid still, tracking the rhythm of her breath with the gentle rise and fall of her bare shoulders. He recalled poignant, gentle memories of their love-making as he cuddled against her. It was still dark outside, and Kylo saw frost traced into gentle patterns on the bedroom window, a reminder of the harsh cold the day would bring them. But he was warm here, sharing heat with Rey under the covers. He’d gladly spend the whole day here. But Rey was passionate about working, so he couldn’t try to keep her in bed without feeling guilt.
Eventually, her alarm went off. He heard her grumble before she turned around to reach over him and turn off the alarm clock. She looked grumpy as she slowly opened her eyes, adjusting to the light coming from the lamp they’d forgotten to turn off before falling asleep. When she recognized his face, her lips quirked up in a smile. Kylo didn’t even get a chance to worry about his morning breath before she kissed him soundly, rolling herself on top of him. She rocked her hips against his, her eagerness clear. Kylo nearly laughed, it seemed they had opened a can of worms last night. Her naked heat grazed his cock, making his breath hitch.
“Rey,” he said, in between kisses.
She didn’t respond, and instead took to sucking what he was sure were marks into his neck. Fuck.
“Rey,” he struggled to repeat, gently pulling her off of him.
“What?” she asked with a cute scowl.
“You’re going to be late for work if you rile me up like this.”
She grinned at that, taking his hands in her own and pinning them above his head.
“You’re right,” she said.
She released his hands and climbed off of him. He was definitely going to be investigating that position in the future.
“I’m taking a shower. You coming?” she asked as she walked out of the room, tossing a look back at him over her shoulder. He watched her naked body with reverence, jumping out of bed when she turned down the hallway, out of sight.
He chased her from behind, scooping her up by the waist and hoisting her over his shoulder. He slapped her ass as she squealed. He walked them into the bathroom, setting her down to turn on the water. She smirked at him as they let the water heat up, and ran her hands up and down his chest. He couldn’t believe how comfortable they were, both naked and exposed and in love. He, for one, never liked exposing himself in any way to others – emotionally or physically. He kept himself carefully guarded. And Rey had told him that she wasn’t one for close relationships. So the fact that they were here, together, naked in her bathroom was something that must have been predestined. Maybe they were meant for each other all along.
Rey pulled him into the shower with her, smiling her impossibly bright smile at him. Her eyes told him that there was no way they were getting out of this without him fucking her up against the wall of the shower.
She got the business out of the way first, squeezing some shampoo into both of their hands.
“You don’t have conditioner?” he asked after rinsing his hair, surprised.
“Oh, uh, no, I’ve never used it...” she said, looking embarrassed. “Is that how you get your hair so soft?”
“Yeah,” he said, laughing.
“I’ll have to get some,” she said, winking at him.
He watched her as she poured some soap into her hand. He put his hand out for some, but she simply shook her head at him. Before he knew it, her hands were all over him, lathering him up. His body responded immediately, small trails of fire burning wherever she dragged her hands, goosebumps erupting despite the hot water. She didn’t bother with his legs, which was a good thing since he didn’t know what he would have done if he had seen her on her knees in front of him. Just the thought of it along with how she was rubbing his body was making him hard. Rey noticed, blushing as she looked down at him.
She pushed him under the showerhead, letting the suds wash away. Then she handed him the soap bottle. He couldn’t help but grin as he poured a generous amount into his hand and placed the bottle down on a ledge. He transferred some to his other hand before grabbing her body, starting at her stomach. She was taut and soft all at the same time, and he loved how big his hands looked on her waist. He teased her by running his thumbs just under her breasts before moving to her back and shoulders, his hands gliding over her skin. He watched as she closed her eyes, looking peaceful and happy, maybe happier than he’d ever seen her look. His heart ached with the beauty of it. Was he the source of her joy? He couldn’t believe it. As much fun as lathering her up was, he stopped. She opened her eyes with a look of confusion. He brought his arms around her shoulders and hugged her tightly against him. After a moment, she brought her hands up to cup the back of his shoulders. After giving her a good squeeze, he released her, already missing her face.
“What was that for?” she asked him when he stepped back.
He shrugged. “You make me happy.”
She looked at him with a warm expression, almost as if she was about to cry. Instead, she smiled and cupped his face, stroking along his jaw. They stood their for a moment, looking into each other's eyes.
“The water’s getting cold,” he said, breaking the moment, a bit overwhelmed with the intensity of emotions swirling.
Rey scrunched her nose at him.
“We’ll have to find a way to warm up,” she said, cocking an eyebrow.
Kylo gasped when he felt her hand wrap around his dick. He breathed through his nose as she stroked him to hardness. He couldn’t control himself as he rutted against her hand, it was like his body was hardwired to be turned on by her. He found himself backing her against the far wall of the shower, leaning against the wall with his hands and caging her within.
“Turn around,” he growled.
She looked ecstatic as she did what he asked, looking back over her shoulder with a deliciously innocent pout.
He threaded an arm around her, cupping a breast as he breathed into her ear.
“Do you want me to take you right here, up against the wall?” he asked, running his tongue along the shell of her ear. He relished the shiver he felt go down her body.
“Yes,” she murmured, pressing her bum back up against his groin.
“Tell me, Rey,” he ordered her, running his thumb over her nipple. He loved to hear her say that she wanted him.
She arched her back, wiggling her hips against his and throwing her head back against his shoulder.
“Kylo, fu- fuck me, p-please,” she said, trembling.
He’d never her heard her so vulgar before, or so desperate. It made his cock twitch. He acquiesced, running his other hand down to her core, his middle finger finding her clit. She would need to be wet, as water was a terrible lubricant. He started with light pressure, pleased with the sounds she was making as she continued to rock her hips back against him. His cock ached, but he could be patient for a moment. He wanted her to be ready for him. His ministrations seemed to get her going, because it didn’t take long for him to feel her wetness on his hand, the kind that wasn’t from the shower. He brought his hand up to his face to smell it, to smell her. Her scent was intoxicating.
Rey whined in the absence of his touch, and began to stroke herself. Kylo looked down at her over her shoulder, over her body and to her hand frantically rubbing at herself. It was the hottest thing he’d ever seen.
“Kylo,” she moaned, pushing an insistently hard thrust back against him.
He grabbed her hips, tilting them forward. He paused to appreciate how her ass looked as it was bared before him. He began to stroke along her folds with his dick, gathering up the wetness on his tip…
“Fuck,” he muttered, “do I need to get a condom?”
“No,” Rey whined, leaning even further forward against the wall to offer an even better angle. “I- IUD. Just go.”
“Are you sure?”
He didn’t want to assume anything. She’d had condoms ready for him last night… he liked that she was careful even if she had an IUD. He was clean, he’d even gotten tested after his last fling more than a year ago.
“Kylo,” Rey said again, impatient with how he had paused. The head of his penis was still teasing her lower lips, and it didn’t help that she was wriggling against it. “Please, I’m clean. I need you.”
He couldn’t resist her when she was begging him like that. His hips automatically shot forward, sliding his length all the way home. They groaned in unison, experiencing each other raw for the first time. Kylo was astonished by how good it felt, like he was having sex for the first time. Rey was his first in a way, the first woman he truly loved. It was fitting that everything feel new with her. He began pumping in and out, slowly working her open. He held her waist as he drove into her, watching her hands as they scrambled at the wet tile wall, unable to find purchase. He felt powerful behind her, the sick sense of possession somehow making him even harder. But he knew deep down that it was really she who owned him, and he wouldn’t have it any other way.
He fucked her hard against the shower wall, grabbing at her hips, her shoulders, anything to help him pummel her as she begged him for more, more, more. She reached down for her clit, and it only took a few strokes for her to clamp down on his cock, her scream echoing in the bathroom. He worked himself in and out of her, and her whimper when she came down from her release made his own orgasm explode. He pulled out, shooting his cum all over her back and butt.
They both stood for a while, catching their breath. Slowly, Rey turned back around, looking at him with a smug satisfaction. She pushed him back until they were both under the stream of extremely lukewarm water. She stood up on her tiptoes, kissing his large nose before leaning in close to his ear.
“Come inside me next time.”
Rey made it to work just barely on time, with seconds to spare, running from her car to the locker room. Luke didn’t tolerate tardiness.
“Hey, Peanut,” Finn said as she sat down next to him at the ski school staff check in. “What had you late this morning?” he asked with a knowing smile.
“I’m not late,” she argued, knowing full well that she was probably blushing.
“Did you spend the night with lover bo-?”
“Alright, let’s get started,” Luke said, coming out of his office and into the locker room, where the staff was sitting on the benches.
Rey was thankful for his timely start, as she felt Finn’s smarmy grin on her left.
“We have 3 private never-evers this morning,” Luke said, looking at his clipboard. “Rey, Armitage, Quorr.”
Rey stood up to retrieve her slip from Luke, accidentally catching Finn’s eyes as she sat back down. His shit-eating grin was unmistakable, he could tell she had something juicy.
“Finn, you’ve got a repeat from last week,” Luke said, leading Finn to stand up and get his slip.
“Kolbrun, you’ve got your regular Monday lessons…” Luke continued.
“So,” Finn whispered to her, elbowing her in the side. “Spill. Did you have fun with Kylo last night?”
Rey looked around, praying no one had heard him. She pursed her lips, nearly punching the suggestively wiggling eyebrows off of him.
“Girl! Tell me!” he whispered too loudly. Luke glared at him for a moment, then continued listing off the day’s lessons.
“Was he good?” Finn asked when Luke looked away. Damn was he persistent. Rey had always been private about her sex life, but then again she’d never had any friends with whom to talk about it.
“Can we talk about this later?” she whispered fiercely at him.
“Ok, ok,” he said, “but you’re telling me everything.”
A few hours later, Rey and Finn met up in the locker room to eat their lunch. Neither of them had any lessons scheduled for the afternoon yet, although they would need to check in again in about an hour.
“So?” Finn asked as he pulled his lunch out of his locker and sat down next to her.
“So, what?” Rey asked as she took a bite of her granola bar. She hadn’t had time to pack a real lunch. Someone had distracted her.
“Did you and Kylo… you know?”
Rey elbowed him hard to shut him up. She looked around the room, making sure everyone was immersed in their own conversations.
“It… we… yes,” she whispered.
“WHAT?” Finn yelled loudly.
Rey smacked a hand over his mouth to keep him from saying anything more. People were already looking at them.
“We are not talking about this here, Finn Storm. So help me if you say a word to anyone I will kill you.”
Finn batted away her hand from his mouth, looking apologetic.
“Sorry,” he whispered, “why so secretive?”
“I’m just… not ready to share this yet. I just want it to be between me and him for a while.”
“I get that.”
“Plus if Hux found out about us I would never hear the end of it.”
“Ugh,” Finn grimaced. “That guy is so creepy. He must be into you, I’m serious. I don’t see any other reason why he would single you out so often like that.”
Rey nearly vomited her granola bar at the thought of it.
Finn’s phone buzzed, and he groaned when he checked it.
“What?” Rey asked.
“That’s Irella. She wants me to meet her in the lodge so we can make a lesson plan for our group lesson later on.”
“Ok, can we hang out later? I want to hear everything!”
“Finn, I’m not going to tell you… everything.”
“Oh, God no. I didn’t mean everything. Trust me, I don’t want to know. Just, like, the PG version.”
“That I can do,” Rey promised.
Finn snatched up his lunch and left the locker room, waving goodbye.
Rey was just getting to work on the apple she managed to snag before running out of her house when her own phone buzzed.
u free? kylo and i just got off for lunch. Hut?
be there in 5
She smiled as she pulled her jacket back on, holding the apple in her mouth as she popped on her helmet. She munched on the rest of the apple as she took the A chair to the top of the mountain, then tossed the core into the forest before skiing down toward the bottom of the C chair, where the Hut hid behind a couple of trees. She skied up to it from behind, leaning her skis and poles up against Poe’s. She didn’t feel like digging her key out of her inner jacket pocket, so she knocked on the door instead.
“Hey, babe,” Poe greeted her as he let her in.
She walked over to Kylo where he was reclined in his black leather seat and gave him a kiss on the forehead as he grabbed her hand. She sank down next to him in her old, worn, velvet chair, Old Bertha.
“I think I’m gonna hurl,” Poe said in response to their sweet, wordless hello.
“Now you know how I feel around you and literally every person you’ve ever spoken too,” Kylo snarked.
Rey scowled. That was not what she wanted to hear about the man romancing her best friend.
“Poe Dameron, are you a player?”
“No!” he exclaimed, sitting in his usual spot across from Rey and Kylo.
“He used to be,” Kylo asserted.
“Ok, maybe a little,” Poe relented, holding up his fingers in a pinching motion. It was hard to stay mad at him with his handsome smile and the way his eyes crinkled around the edges when he did so.
“You haven’t really dated anyone in a while,” Kylo pointed out.
“Yeah,” he admitted. “I don’t know… I’ve just felt different recently. I don’t know… I guess I want something serious…”
“Do you think Finn could be something serious?” Rey asked gently.
“I, I think so…” Poe said, looking out the window. “Maybe. I hope so.”
“Wow, when did you become such a schmuck?” Kylo asked.
Rey frowned at him, and Poe picked one of the tennis balls off of the ground and pelted at him.
“I think it’s cute,” Rey said, defending him.
“I was just kidding!” Kylo yelled as Poe continued to find things within arm’s distance to throw at him.
“When is your date?” Rey asked, breaking up the boys’ fight.
“Tomorrow,” Poe said. “I’m a little nervous. Mostly excited though I guess.”
“No need to be nervous, Finn really likes you. Just be yourself.”
“Thanks,” Poe said, smiling. “I will.”
Now that she’d found happiness, she wanted nothing more than for Finn and Poe to find it too. Hopefully with each other, they were such a good match. The way they had hit it off so quickly was kind of amazing. She and Kylo had danced around each other for over a year before figuring things out.
“What are you doing after work?” Kylo asked her, picking her hand back up to hold it in his.
“My friend Rose and I are going shopping, you know, Rose from the bakery.” she said. “She needs a dress for a wedding. I have literally no fashion sense so I’m not sure why she asked me. But we haven’t hung out just the two of us in a while.”
“I suppose I may be to blame for that…” he said, looking genuinely sorry.
“We both are,” she said, winking at him.
Poe faked a puking noise across from them, leaving Rey to pick up the nearest tennis ball and throw it at him, starting a three-way battle. They were all too lazy to get out of their chairs, especially Rey and Poe in their ski boots, so the fight ended when all of the balls were finally out of reach from their seats.
“All right, I’ve got to get back,” Kylo said after glancing at the clock. “Don’t miss me too much,” he added, winking at Rey.
“We need new Hut rules– no flirting,” Poe complained, earning him a noogie as Kylo passed him to walk out.
Rey laughed, feeling happy, and light, and all the things she had never imagined for herself. She and Poe chatted some more, and Rey gave him insider info on what Finn liked and disliked, how to charm him. Their friendship was fun and easy, much like her and Finn’s relationship. How she gained a boyfriend and a friend in one swoop was beyond her, but she felt lucky.
Chapter 23: The Hut, Part II
Kylo and Rey were cuddled up on his couch, both reading their respective books. Kylo loved that Rey seemed to appreciate his passion for literature. She let him talk about books for hours, and she was always skimming his overflowing bookshelf at his apartment or insisting they stop by his parents’ house to raid their library.
“I never got the chance to read much,” she’d told him about her past. He hated thinking about her time in the foster system, and was furious she was even given up in the first place.
He’d shared some of his favorite books with her, and she was set upon working her way through them. Today, she was laying down on the couch with her head in his lap, much as she had done the night of Thanksgiving in his parents’ conservatory. Except this time, Kylo didn’t hesitate to stroke her hair or smile down at her. The evenings they spent together after work soon replaced his meager list of favorite memories. They were all Rey now.
“Rey…” he started, suddenly struck by what was really an obvious question he should have asked weeks ago.
“Yeah?” she asked, looking up at him from his lap.
“What are you doing for Christmas?”
Christmas was a mere two weeks away, and although stores and commercials were full of holiday content, he hadn’t even thought to ask Rey about her plans. He’d been so distracted by their time together that he forgot to plan for the future.
“Oh,” she said, looking back at her book, casually flipping to the next page. “I don’t have any plans, really. Last year I just worked on some of my projects. Finn and Rose usually travel to see family.”
“So… you mean you’ll be spending it with me?” he asked hopefully.
She looked back up at him, cocking a smile.
“I mean I didn’t want to assume anything but of course I was planning on spending it with you!”
She sat up and turned to face him, a beaming energy now radiating from her.
“What do you normally do? Do you get a tree? Do I need to get you a gift? I’ve never really done anything for Christmas before, you’ll have to teach me.”
It made his heart painfully clench to think she’d never had family with whom to celebrate, but he was excited that he’d be able to witness her first real Christmas. He didn’t exactly have loads of Christmas spirit, but he would do anything and everything she wanted.
“Well, I usually spend the majority of Christmas with my family. The specifics depend on my work schedule. Which days are you working?”
“I signed up for Christmas Eve and Day at the beginning of the season,” she said with a small pout. “I thought I’d just be alone on Christmas anyway so I was eager for the double-time pay.”
“No worries,” Kylo said. “I’m working Christmas Day too. How about we spend Christmas Eve alone together after you get off of work and then head to my parents’ for Christmas Day dinner?”
“I’d love that!” Rey enthused, putting her book down on the couch to grab his face and give him a kiss.
“Did you want to get a tree?” Kylo asked. He’d never bought one for himself before. Leia went all out with decorations, so he usually got enough festivity whenever he swung by his parents’ house.
“I do,” she answered. “Do you… do you think we could get one for my house?”
“Of course,” he said. “Let’s get one tomorrow so you have plenty of time to enjoy it.”
Rey was nearly vibrating with excitement as she crawled into his lap to hug him tightly.
“Let’s get a really big one. And let’s invite Finn and Poe and Rose over to help decorate. Although I’ll need to buy lights. And ornaments. And whatever else goes on a Christmas tree. Oh my god, should I get stockings? I have a fireplace! Holy shit, what else am I supposed to get?”
Kylo laughed at her, combing his fingers through her hair as they discussed everything they should do to get in the Christmas spirit. Kylo loved the way her eyes twinkled, the way her eyes opened wide as she listened to him. He wanted nothing more than to give her an amazing Christmas, and whatever else she wanted. A home, a family, a lifetime. He was wrapped around her finger.
“Come in,” Luke said when Kylo knocked at his office door inside the staff locker room at First Order Mountain.
“Hey,” Kylo said, entering. He closed the door behind him and plopped himself in the chair across from his uncle.
“How are you, Ben?”
“Nothing to complain about,” he said as Luke sipped daintily at a mug of tea. “You?”
“Just fine, nothing besides old age catching up with me.”
Kylo didn’t like to think about Luke getting old. It reminded him that his mom was aging at the same rate.
“I got your text. What’s up?”
“Well…” Luke began, “I wanted to discuss a few things that are… semi work-related.”
“It’s about Snoke.”
Kylo rolled his eyes.
“I’ve told you a million times, Uncle Luke. I don’t want to get involved with anything about Snoke. When I walked away from him, that was it. I wasted too much of my life caught up with that shit.”
“But Kylo, this time we really have a chance to take him down…”
“And I’m glad!” Kylo said, his fists clenching. “But I really can’t get involved! You know what that man does to me. I can’t control my anger when I’m around him. And I can’t afford to get in any trouble. I barely have this job and I don’t really have many options for another one.”
“I’m not asking for much,” Luke persisted, “I just need you to… get some information for me. Then we can get him out of your mother’s hair for good. And yours.”
“I’m not going within 100 feet of that man or any of his shit.”
“Why are you being so stubborn, Ben?”
“Because of what happened the last time I let everyone’s own agendas get to me! Or do you not remember, Uncle?!”
“I can’t believe you won’t do this to help your own mother.”
“You know this isn’t about her. If you need anything that doesn’t involve Snoke, I’m your guy. Otherwise, fuck off.”
Kylo stormed out of Luke’s office, slamming the door behind him.
Rey sighed as she watched Kylo take out his anger on the Hut.
“He always thinks he knows best!” Kylo shouted, throwing the tennis ball hard against the backboard of the mini basketball hoop. He caught the rebound, and threw it again. “He’s always telling me what to do with my life!”
“Maybe he thinks this is what’s best for you… even if he’s wrong,” Rey tried to console him.
“He doesn’t give a damn about me, he just wants to catch Snoke, no matter what happens to me,” he said angrily. “I should just quit, start over again.”
He continued to pummel the tennis ball against the backboard, catching it each time just to throw it again. The backboard rang with a metallic squeal each time, and shook the supports of the old Hut. Rey knew Kylo had some anger problems. That’s what most people knew about him before even properly meeting him. Rey was usually able to talk him down quite quickly, he responded well to her. She didn’t want to invalidate his feelings, but he could be quite destructive when he was angry. When she calmed him down, he was usually able to approach his problem with a bit more finesse.
“Hey,” she said, standing up, approaching him to place a hand on his throwing arm. He stopped, finally looking her in the eye. Even her proximity to him seemed to help – she watched as his features relaxed and he let out a long breath.
“You’re in control of your life now,” she said to him, letting her hands wander up his arms to gently rest on his shoulders. “You belong to no one – not your parents, not Luke, not Snoke. It’s ok to make your own choices, I’ll be there to support you. If you want to quit, quit. If you want to work with Luke, work with Luke. Just be safe, and please don’t hurt your family in the process, I really like them and I don’t wanna have to stop hanging out with them.”
Kylo studied her for a moment, then dropped the tennis ball. His hands found hers, then pulled them off of his shoulders to rest them on top of his heart.
“You’re right,” he said. “I need to think on this for a while. And I know Luke probably doesn’t mean to put me in this situation, he just really doesn’t know how to deal with people sometimes.”
“To be fair, neither do you,” Rey said, leaning forward to kiss the hand that was holding hers to his heart.
“That’s true,” he said with a chuckle into her hair. “You got one thing wrong, by the way.”
“What’s that?” she asked, looking back up at him, her chin on his chest.
“You said I didn’t belong to anyone. You’re wrong. I belong to you.”
He bent down to give her a gentle kiss, full of love. She never felt more treasured than when he did that. She wished she could make him feel better. Then again, she did know one thing that always seemed to cheer him up...
“Hey, you know what will make you feel better?”
“What?” he asked, suddenly curious.
“Defiling the Hut,” she said, grinning evilly.
He paused for a moment, seeming to process what she was suggesting.
“You’re – you’re serious…” he said slowly, Adam’s apple bobbing, his eyes searching hers for the punchline of a joke.
His eyes widened as he realized she was dead serious. Kylo looked toward the door nervously, as if he expected Poe to come strolling through it at that very moment.
“You. You’re twisted,” he accused her, finally giving her a mischievous smirk of his own.
“Very,” she agreed, grabbing the back of Poe’s recliner and pulling it in front of the door of the Hut to block it.
“Did you want to take your boots off?” he asked, gesturing to her cumbersome ski boots that inhibited any sort of pants removal.
“No need,” she replied with a wink, walking over toward the counter to bend forward over it, offering up her behind to Kylo like an offering. She knew she never had to do much to get Kylo in the mood. He seemed to be ready whenever she was.
“Fuck, Rey,” he groaned as he approached her.
She shivered as his fingers found their way under her shirt and traced along the circumference of her waist. One hand moved up to cup her breast through her sports bra, the other fiddled with the fastening of her snowpants.
“Can’t believe you let me have you,” Kylo said lowly, leaning forward to kiss her neck with a sloppy amount of tongue.
“I’m yours,” she said confidently, never more sure of a statement in her entire life. No one had ever cared for her like Kylo did, no one could ever please her like he could, no one ever loved her the way he loved her. The years of loneliness and pain were worth it if they had lead her to him. They had fallen fast and hard, and Rey was surprisingly ok with that.
“No,” he countered, pulling down her snowpants, leggings, and underwear as far as they could go in one swoop. Her breath hitched at the feeling of the cold air against her exposed center. “I’m yours. No one else’s. Yours, Rey.”
Rey felt her stomach bottom out at his words, at the way he said her name. She never knew she was possessive, but hearing him say those words to her desperately turned her on. She loved the idea of being the one Kylo came home to. Those ski patrol skanks could look all they wanted, but she was the one he loved, the one he did naughty, naughty things to.
Rey jumped when she felt an unexpected soft peck on her thigh just below her left buttcheek. She looked back to see Kylo kneeling on the ground behind her, looking particularly sexy with his hair pushed out of his face.
“Did I surprise you, babe?” he asked, placing another kiss on the other thigh as he grabbed her legs with his hands.
She couldn’t respond as he trailed more kisses up her thigh, onto her butt, then back down to her inner thigh.
“Kylo,” she said as he pushed her legs further apart, “I’m supposed to be making you feel better.”
“Mm,” he moaned as he ran his tongue down her folds, making her gasp. “This is making me feel better.”
Rey couldn’t find any reason to continue arguing with him when he had his tongue inside her like that. She whimpered when he pushed his tongue forward right onto her clit. Her sex throbbed, and she felt herself get a little wet.
“That’s right, babe,” Kylo said from behind her, replacing his tongue with a finger that found its way up her channel, “I love it when you’re wet for me.”
“Don’t worry, I won’t stop,” he said, before she felt his tongue again, wickedly finding its way to her clit as he continued to work his finger in and out of her.
She didn’t last long, Kylo knew exactly what he was doing when it came to pleasuring her, an expert after only a few weeks of practice. He wrenched her orgasm out of her with his fingers and his tongue, and licked down all the wetness she had to offer.
Before she could even recover her voice enough to say anything, he slid into her from behind, pressing her harder into the counter. She wailed as he filled her the way only he could. He grabbed her arms to hold them behind her to use as an anchor for his hard thrusts. He’d been more timid when they first started fucking, but she had eventually been able to convince him just how rough she liked it.
“Kylo,” she cried, stunned by how sexy she felt in the moment, even with her snowpants pooled around her ankles and her hair messy from her ski helmet. Kylo made her feel invincible.
“I love you so much,” he said behind her, pushing into her with a particularly savage drive.
Rey nearly laughed at the confession of love while he’s pummeling into her from behind, but she’ll take it. It doesn’t matter, she knows he actually does.
She whimpers when she feels him reach down to rub at her oversensitive clit. Sometimes they made love, sometimes they fucked, fast and hard. This was an example of the latter. He clearly wanted to get her off quickly, maybe because he was close himself. She stood on the tips of her boots to make the angle even better, amazed at how deep he could go inside of her. He talked her through her second orgasm, his low growl and his impossibly dirty words making her clamp down hard on his dick. He came not long after, spilling his cum inside of her, just how she liked it.
They laughed in the aftermath, both feeling ridiculous for so blatantly disobeying Poe’s rules. Kylo helped clean Rey up and get all of her layers of pants back on, she kissed his red cheeks.
“He can’t complain though,” Kylo said as they put their gear back on, their break ending. “I walked in on him and Finn kissing in here the other day.”
“Aw,” Rey said lovingly. She was so happy for Finn and Poe, things were going well between them so far. “But they haven’t banged in here. They haven’t had sex yet.”
“Dude, I don’t want to know,” Kylo said, shaking his head with a grimace before pulling his outer jacket on.
“Oh please, like you don’t tell Poe what we do.”
“Only because he won’t quit asking me.”
“Sure, Kylo. Sure.”
He stuck his tongue out at her has he opened the door of the Hut open for her. She had two more lessons to teach, but now her legs were feeling a little wobbly. Kylo noticed, and grabbed her arm as she began to fall down the little stairs.
“Next time,” she teased him, “don’t fuck me so hard. I can barely walk, and I’m supposed to teach for the rest of the afternoon.”
“Next time?” he asked, smugness coating his voice.
“If you’re good,” she replied with a smile.
She wobbled around to the hidden side of the Hut up against the forest to retrieve her skis, but was pushed back into the wall of it before she could grab them. Kylo kissed her hard, and Rey giggled at his need for touch. Her man was always affection hungry, which was new for someone like Rey. But she was fine with being the strong-willed one in the relationship. She liked rewarding him with the contact he desired. She gave his lips one last peck before grabbing her skis, clipping in, and skiing away, looking back at him as she turned at the bottom of the hill.
Chapter 24: Punch
Kylo hated waking up alone now. Ever since that first night Rey had spent the night in his bed, he no longer slept well unless she was tucked against him. He wasn’t afraid to admit to himself that he was completely dependent on her. But they were both sensible. There were days when their schedules were busy, or needed to be in their own homes, or just wanted to make sure they weren’t moving too quickly. They loved each other, but they had both been alone for so long that they didn’t want to push themselves too far.
But that didn’t change the fact that Kylo prefered his bed when she was in it. It would be easier when they moved in together. If, not when, he had to remind himself. They hadn’t even brought it up. They’d been together for less than a month, although Kylo felt like they’d known eachother a lifetime. But he was self-aware enough to understand that he was probably crazy for even thinking about moving in together already.
He had the day off, but Rey was at work. He wondered what he even did in his spare time before Rey. That’s how natural it felt to spend every waking (and sleeping) minute with her. He laid in bed for a while, letting himself be relax. It was already late in the morning anyway. He picked up his book off of his bedside table and read a few chapters before he was interrupted by his phone ringing. Mom appeared on the screen.
“Hi, Mom,” he said, clearing his throat from sleep.
“Hey honey,” she said, “how’s your day off going?”
“Pretty lazy so far.”
“You should stop by the shop and see your dad. I think he has something he wants to show you.”
“What is it?”
“It’s for Rey,” she said mysteriously.
“Are you going to tell me what it is?”
“You’ll have to talk to him yourself.”
“Actually, Ben, I’m calling with an offer for you to consider.”
“How would you feel about a career change?”
“I don’t really have a ‘career’ now, Mom.”
“Well, honey, that’s sort of my point…” Leia trailed off.
“I mean I’ve been thinking about quitting First Order Mountain for a while now,” he said. They’d spoken about this several times recently. “But I’m not sure what other job I could get around here. At least that I wouldn’t hate more than the job I already have.”
“Well,” Leia said with a pleased-sounding tone, “I think I may have found the perfect job for you.”
“What is it?” he asked, his curiosity peaked.
“How would you feel about being the main librarian at the public library?”
“The library, honey.”
“Well that’s… different. Why… how…”
“Mrs. Cognits, you know, the old librarian? She passed away yesterday.”
“Heart attack, poor thing. She made it to 89, though.”
“I’m sorry to hear that.”
“I think you knew her better than I did, honey. She always read books to you when you were a kid.”
“Do you know when the funeral will be?”
“Not yet. I’ll keep you posted.”
“Anyway,” Leia continued, “the city hasn’t started a search for a new librarian yet, the part-time staff will be covering it for a while. As soon as I heard she passed, I thought to myself, Ben would be a great choice. You know that library like the back of your hand, and you do have a degree in literature. I may be able to convince the board to hire you. I think they will be looking for someone younger so that they won’t have to worry about replacing you for a long time. The past few librarians have all been retirees.”
“That’s… I’ve never thought about being a librarian before.”
“What do you think about it?”
Kylo thought for a moment. He did love the public library. As a kid, when he was bored of the library at his parents house, he’d ride his bike down to the public library and read in a corner for hours. If his parents couldn’t find him, the first place they’d check was the library. He didn’t go much now, he mostly bought used books. But the library was still somewhere he was comfortable. And he wouldn’t have to work for Snoke.
“I think… I think I actually really like this idea,” he said laughing, surprised at himself.
“Oh, good!” Leia said happily over the phone. “I know you hate working for Snoke, I’ve been trying to search for something suitable for you, but I know you like working outside, so I figured just any old indoors job wouldn’t cut it. It had to be something special.”
“You’re right,” Kylo agreed. He enjoyed working as a lumberjack, and liked the mountain despite hating the actual liftie job. The library would be strictly inside, but he did love books. It was something he’d always been passionate about.
“Oh,” he said suddenly.
“What?” his mom asked.
“If I worked at the library, I wouldn’t be working with Rey anymore. Or Poe.”
“Oh, honey. I know. But if your job makes you miserable, it makes you a more miserable person. I think doing this will only strengthen your relationships with the both of them. And I’m sure you’ll see them all the time, anyway. I haven’t even seen you this month, you spend all your time with Rey!”
“I guess…” he said. His mom was right, as always. How could one person be right all the time? It was annoying.
“Plus,” she continued, “this is a real long-term job. You’ll eventually want to settle down and start a family, and doing that while working seasonal jobs is very difficult.”
Kylo’s mind immediately imagined Rey, surrounded by their children. Woah. Where had that come from? He had to blink his eyes a few times to ground himself back in reality.
“So…” Leia started after giving him a few seconds of silence. “Should I keep an ear out for when the board will start the search process for you?”
Kylo thought for another moment. He could at least apply, and see how it went. He could make a final decision, if he was even selected, later after consulting Rey.
“Yes,” he said firmly, “please do.”
He could practically hear his mother smiling through the phone.
“Excellent,” she said. “I’ll be sure to talk you up to the board members. Honestly, I think you’ll be a shoe-in considering you’re young and have a degree. Plus you’ll have my support.”
Mostly, his mom being the mayor was annoying. But sometimes, it was really fucking helpful.
“No problem, honey.”
A few days later, Kylo got a phone call. He was in the middle of pulling dinner out of the oven, so Rey answered it for him.
“Oh, hi Rey!”
“Hi Leia!” she responded enthusiastically. She loved Kylo’s mom. She was like the mom Rey never had. But so much better because she was so much stronger and more bold than Rey had ever imagined a mom could be.
“How are you, dear?”
“I’m great,” she said. “I can’t wait for Christmas Day at your house.”
“We’re looking forward to having you, honey,” Leia said.
Rey saw Kylo smile over at her as he placed the baking dish with homemade lasagna on a trivet at the small dining table.
“I’m putting you on speaker,” Rey said, pressing the corresponding button on the phone and placing the phone on the table, “we’re just getting dinner ready.”
“Ok,” Leia’s voice rang across the apartment. “Hi, Ben.”
“Hi, Mom,” Kylo said from the kitchen, closing the oven door and turning it off.
“I have some good news, honey.”
Rey and Kylo looked at eachother, eyebrows shooting up. They’d been waiting for news from her, but had no idea when it was going to come. This was too soon to be what they were thinking, wasn’t it?
“What’s that?” Kylo asked, walking over to Rey to put his arm around her back.
“You got the job.”
Kylo’s mouth fell open in shock as Rey squealed, jumping up and down and pulling him into a hug.
“Are you serious?” Kylo asked his mom, eyes still wide in disbelief.
“Yep,” Leia answered. “There were a few board members that brought up your… past behaviour. But they couldn’t argue with the fact that you’re the most qualified. The only other candidates were retirees in their 70s, and they didn’t want to have to go through this process again so soon. So you got it. You’re the librarian starting January 1st.”
“Oh my god,” Rey exclaimed, squeezing her boyfriend. She was so happy for him. She knew how much he hated working at the mountain. This was a year-round job, with benefits and everything.
“Mom,” Kylo said while rubbing Rey’s back, “I don’t know what to say.”
“You can start by thanking me, you nimrod.”
Rey laughed, and stood on her tiptoes to plant a kiss on Kylo’s cheek.
“Thanks, Mom,” Kylo said, still looking a bit flustered and shocked. “I can’t believe it. I actually get to quit.”
“I’m as happy as you are,” Leia said. “The board will be emailing you all the paperwork. Make sure you sign it and return it ASAP, young man.”
“I will, I will,” Kylo said, rolling his eyes.
“Don’t roll your eyes at me, Benjamin.”
Rey snorted at Leia’s sixth sense, and left Kylo to discuss the finer details with her as she set the rest of the table and poured them drinks. It was sad to think that she wouldn’t be able to see him at work everyday, but this really was a good thing for him. For them. Rey did everything she could to keep him positive about himself and his life, but working for Snoke weighed him down. He needed to do this for himself. And Rey knew there was nothing Ben loved more than books. It was like the stars had aligned for this to happen, to give him the break he so fully deserved for beating up on himself for so many years.
“All right,” Leia said as Rey finished setting the table, “I’ll let you two eat. Ben, call me tomorrow.”
“Will do,” Kylo answered. “Bye, Mom.”
“Bye, Leia,” Rey chimed in.
Kylo hung up the phone, and looked up to Rey with a relieved grin. It was the most weightless, carefree smile she’d ever seen on him. Her eyes began to tear up a little bit at the thought that he finally felt free. She hadn’t even been aware of the full effect this would have on him, but the look on his face spoke multitudes.
“I’m so happy for you,” she said, crossing the short distance between them to wrap her arms around his neck.
She felt him lean his face into her hair and let out a deep, deep exhale.
“I can’t believe it,” he said lightly.
Rey pulled back to cup his face and kiss him.
“I knew things would work out for you,” she said confidently. “You deserve this, Kylo.”
“I don’t know about that…” he said, closing his eyes and twisting his face.
“Stop it,” she scolded him, slapping his shoulder. “We all deserve a few chances. And this is one of yours.”
Kylo opened his eyes and seemed to consider her words for a moment.
“Perhaps,” he said finally, gently kissing her lips before hugging her to him tightly again.
Rey enjoyed the embrace for a few moments, internally rejoicing how happy her boyfriend was, and would continue to be. Eventually, however, her mind strayed.
“Ok, I know this is a special moment and everything, but I’m starving and your lasagna smells SO good,” she said into his shoulder.
Kylo laughed into her hair, squeezing her once more before releasing her.
“I should have known better than to keep you from your food,” he said, smiling.
He pulled her seat out for her at the table. He was always doing strange things like that.
“Damn straight,” she said, winking at him.
She held her wine glass up, offering a toast.
“To new chances.”
“To new chances,” he said, clinking his glass to hers.
A few days before Christmas, Rey returned to the locker room at the end of the day to run straight into a snarling Hux.
“What on Earth are you doing with Ren?” he barked at her as she walked from the door to her locker. The other few ski school employees and lifties in the locker room turned to look at the cause of the commotion.
“What do you mean?” she asked, playing dumb. She didn’t owe Hux any sort of explanation. She and Kylo kept their relationship private from their coworkers, mostly to avoid giving Hux another reason to terrorize them. It looked like they’d been discovered.
“You know exactly what I mean, you filthy tramp.”
Rey turned to Hux at that, cocking an eyebrow. He didn’t normally resort to such blatant name-calling. It really should have angered her, but he was so ridiculously animated in the moment that it almost came off as funny. He sounded like a bully from a movie. What a pathetic joke.
“Please, Armitage,” she said, rolling her eyes at him, “if I was a filthy tramp I would have taken you up on one of your propositions months ago.”
“How dare you,” he sputtered in reply, face turning red. “I’m nothing like Ren.”
“And that’s why I’m dating him,” she laughed, opening the door of her locker and pulling her instructor’s jacket off.
Hux took a step closer to her then, invading her personal space as she placed her jacket on a hook.
“Ren is a worthless piece of garbage, just like his parents. And you’re nothing but his whore,” he hissed in her ear.
Rey was just about to retort when a hand landed on Hux’s shoulder, yanking him violently backwards.
“What did you just say to her?” Kylo asked lowly, eyes burning with rage. Rey didn’t like where this was going.
“Ah, Ren,” Hux said, composing himself. “Rey and I were just discussing her recent… social proclivities.”
“Is that so?” Kylo asked. Rey didn’t like the way his shoulders and his jaw were tensed.
“Kylo,” Rey said, trying to convey a sense of warning in her tone. Hux wasn’t worth the trouble.
Kylo looked over at her for a moment, seeming to untense a little. But he still looked quite angry when he redirected his frown at Hux.
“Really, I must applaud you Ren,” Hux sneered. “Who knew that we would ever see the day that someone could... tolerate you so.”
Rey could see Kylo biting the inside of his cheek, attempting to keep himself from saying anything.
“Although,” Hux continued, glancing over at Rey and looking her up and down, then reaching around her to grab her ass, “I suppose it’s fitting that the only person willing to fuck you would be the town’s grubby orphan slut.”
Rey was shocked when Kylo laughed. That had not been the reaction she’d been expecting. His next action, however was more in character.
“Oh Hux,” Kylo said through his laugh, “you have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do this.”
Hux only had a moment to look at him in confusion before Kylo’s fist inelastically collided with his face. Rey winced at the crunch she heard as Hux’s nose broke. The swing put Hux down sprawled out on the floor, clutching his bleeding face.
“I’ll have you fired for this, Ren!” he shouted nasally, holding his nose.
“Too bad I quit this morning, Armitage!” Kylo shouted back, standing over him.
Rey’s mouth was still open in shock. Kylo had knocked him about before she had the chance to, and she was simultaneously stunned by the turn of events and satisfied with the image of Hux crawling on the floor.
“This is assault!” Hux wailed.
“Yes,” Luke suddenly said from across the room, exiting his office. “It’s sexual assault, Mr. Hux, to touch someone inappropriately without their consent. Not to mention in the workplace.”
Kylo and Rey looked at each other in awe as Luke continued.
“And we can’t blame Rey for defending herself in a such a situation,” Luke said, stopping in front of them. “Especially when your harassment has been constant since she began working here, as many of our staff members can attest to.”
He looked around at the few instructors that were watching them all nervously. They all nodded their heads in agreement, glaring at Hux. Everyone hated Hux, that was universal.
“That’s… but…” Hux sputtered, finally standing up. His blood was starting to cake on his face and down his neck.
“Perhaps you’ve learned your lesson to keep to yourself, Mr. Hux,” Luke said in a strange, persuasive tone.
“Mr. Snoke will be hearing about this first thing in the morning!” Hux griped, pointing a finger at Kylo.
“Be our guest,” Luke said, “I’m sure he’ll be pleased to hear that you’ve been harrassing Rey, who has yet to report you to the authorities. We can’t have you getting another strike on your record, can we?”
Hux’s jaw would have dropped if he wasn’t still holding onto his face. He appeared shocked to know that Luke knew about his criminal record and the thin line he was walking on in terms of the police.
“And, I think you’ll find that Mr. Snoke may no longer be… responsible for staff issues like you might hope,” Luke said mysteriously.
Rey and Kylo looked at each other in confusion. What did Luke know that they didn’t?
Hux didn’t seem to understand either.
“We’ll see, Skywalker,” he scoffed, turning to walk briskly out of the locker room and toward the parking lot.
Rey and Kylo were now staring at Luke.
“What?” he asked them. “Don’t look at me like that. I told you things would work out, Rey.”
Rey did vaguely recall Luke telling her that he’d help her out with the whole Hux situation, but hadn’t really expected… this. No one would have, really.
“And you!” Luke said, pointing a finger at Kylo. “Really, Ben? This couldn’t have been done in the parking lot? Now there’s blood all over my carpet!”
Rey had really expected Luke to yell at Kylo for punching. He was kind of a hippie, always talking about conflict resolution and whatnot. Skywalkers always seemed to surprise her.
It looked like Kylo had been expecting Luke to reprimand him to, for he apologized immediately and even offered to help clean it up.
“Good,” Luke said, looking pleased. “Well, if that’s all, you two better run along. Rey, I’ll see you tomorrow. Kylo, you should probably avoid this place altogether from now on.”
“Can’t argue with that,” Kylo mumbled, scratching his head.
Luke then floated back into his office and closed the door as if nothing had happened.
Kylo and Rey turned, looking at each other for a moment before bursting into laughter.
“Holy shit!” Rey said, trying to breathe.
“That was crazy,” Kylo said.
“I’m so jealous that you got to punch him!” Rey said, stepping towards him to slap his arm.
“It did feel really good,” he admitted, grabbing her hand to pull her in for a hug. “But it’s probably better that I did it, you’re the one that still has to work here.”
“That’s true,” she agreed. “Although I’m going to love it even more now that Hux won’t bother me again.”
“If he does,” Kylo said seriously, “you know where to find me.”
“Yes I do,” she said, looking up at him. “My little librarian.”
“Who you calling little?” he asked with a smile, picking her up to spin her around a few times.
She laughed as he set her back down and undid the buckle of her helmet. She was still in full gear, having forgotten to start undressing during the strange interaction.
“We still going back to my house?” she asked him as she started stripping off her face and neck gear.
“Yep,” he replied. “Who’s on the schedule for locker room cleanup today? I should try to help get the blood out of the carpet.”
“Don’t know, check the board.”
Kylo walked over to the bulletin board, and Rey heard him laugh a moment later.
“Finn’s the ski school person on duty,” he said, walking back toward her, where she was now sitting on a bench to take her ski boots off.
“At least he’ll get a kick out of seeing Hux’s blood on the floor,” she said smugly.
“Speaking of the devil…” Kylo said.
Rey looked up to see Finn walk through the door.
“Hey guys,” he said, taking off his helmet. “Cold one today, eh?”
“Sure was,” Rey said, slipping off her snow pants.
“You quit this morning, right, Kylo?” Finn asked, opening his locker.
“Yes, I did,” Kylo said in the most cheery tone Rey had ever heard him use.
“Good for you,” Finn said, shooting him a genuine smile. Rey was so glad that they were getting along better now that they’d gotten to know each other. It also helped that things were going well between Finn and Poe. She could tell by the way that Kylo looked at the two of them that he approved of the match for his best friend.
“Thanks,” Kylo said. “By the way, it looks like I may be helping you out with cleaning duty tonight. I may or may not have spilled something on the carpet.”
Finn turned to look at the spot where Kylo was staring.
“Woah,” he said. “Is that blood?!”
“Are you alright?” Finn asked, looking Kylo up and down as if expecting a gaping wound.
“I’m fine,” Kylo said, “but Hux’s face has seen better days.”
Finn’s eyes opened comically wide.
“Holy shit! You punched Hux!?”
“Yeah,” Kylo said. “He insulted Rey.”
“Dude!” Finn said, coming over to pull Kylo off of the bench into a bro hug. Rey almost laughed at the awkward way Kylo returned it.
“This may be the best day of my life,” Finn said.
“You’re not going to get in any sort of trouble, are you?”
“I don’t think so,” Kylo said. “Just need to clean the carpet.”
“Wow,” Finn said, walking back over to his locker. “That’s amazing.”
“I’ll get started on the carpet while you finish up,” Kylo told Rey as she began to change and organize all of her gear. Getting undressed from a day of skiing was a process.
A minute later, she heard David Bowie blasting through the locker room speakers, a callback to the first time she and Kylo had clean-up duty together. That’s when her car had broken down, and their real relationship started. It seemed so long ago now, but it really had just been about two months. She laughed and threw Kylo a grin as he opened the supply closet to grab bleach and various cleaning tools. He winked at her.