Natsu blinked the sleep from his eyes, waiting the seconds as he adjusted to the darkness around them. The clock came into focus, the second hand ticking away as minutes passed in silence, as Natsu was so used to.
Sometimes he hated it, what it took from him. The sound of Lucy's laugh, Happy's meow, his father's voice. But then there were times he was thankful, being able to shut out the world when everything became just a little too much. Or times like now, when Natsu was able to focus on all his other senses in the moment before him.
The smell of Lucy's hair, still a little wet from her shower before bed. The scent of sleep and warm bed tangled with her golden curls swam through his mind, lulling him back into a half-sleep daze. It was a little after two AM, at least according to the old-fashioned clock that hung above Lucy's door that Natsu had been watching before. It was clichy and less than well made, a bright blue ring about the clock with a cat's head peeking over the top. It had reminded Natsu of Happy peeking out of things he shouldn't be in like Lucy's desk, or her closet, or Natsu's school bag, that he couldn't help but buy it for her. And to his surprise, she had loved it.
Natsu nestled deeper under the blanket, his arm tightening around Lucy's middle where he had slung it sometime in the night. It was rare that they went to bed at the same time, almost always one of them -or both- having some insane project due or homework that needed to be done, and tonight had been no different. Natsu had gone to bed at a reasonable time of passing out at eight PM and had somehow moved from the sofa to the bed. Probably Lucy. She was nice like that.
Lucy was also nice to hold, soft and squishy and warm in his arms. Natsu knew she hated the layer of baby fat she could never get rid of no matter how often she went to the gym or came home with scrapes and bruises from lacrosse practice, but it was one of the things he loved about her. Natsu loved a lot of stuff about Lucy. He loved her smile, and her pouts. He loved how every single emotion Lucy felt played in her deep brown eyes unashamedly, and how she could cry because Happy had done something too cute or was angry or just tired. He loved how her moods were unpredictable like a hurricane but how easy it was to pull a laugh from her anyway. Natsu loved how Lucy danced to a beat he could never know, and how she pulled him into it along with her when she saw him, never thinking that he couldn't join her. Never thinking that she deserved more than what he could give her.
Natsu didn't act selfishly all that often, it going against everything his father had taught him, but with Lucy… With Lucy he was allowed to be selfish. He was allowed to want to take up her time and attention. He wouldn't, no, couldn't deny himself from that, no matter how much he knew he burdened her. Because Lucy never once made him feel like a burden. Only a handful of people had done that, Igneel being on that short list.
Natsu blinked as Lucy shifted in his arms, pushing back against him. A soft touch along his forearm let him know she was awake, her small hand cupping his and twining their fingers together. Natsu half grinned to himself when he thought about how it was kind of like kissing, squeezing her fingers back gently. Natsu really liked kissing, in every way they did. He liked feeling how her breath stuttered and her body moved to his in a deep kiss, or feeling the heat and softness of her full lips for the half-second of a peck. He liked how she tasted, and how she felt. Natsu liked everything about her, and if he could hear he'd bet he'd love how she sounded. Lucy looked like she'd have a nice voice. Soothing, and sweet, like petting Happy's fur as he purred in Natsu's lap. Or ice cream.
Natsu grinned into Lucy's hair as she pressed even tighter to him, her head half turned so he could barely make out her profile. Her eyes were closed, lips turned up in her own sleepy grin. Natsu felt a deep, almost winding fondness resonate through him at the small gesture, his thumb rubbing small circles into the side of her wrist.
"Didn't mean to wake ya," he spoke, trying to keep his voice soft and low. It was hard to think about how loud he might be to others when the only thing that let him know he was speaking out loud was the vibrations of his throat and feeling of the silent words on his tongue and teeth.
Lucy shrugged, gently taking one of Natsu's hands and lifting it to her face, her warm breath surrounding his fingertips as she placed his fingers to her lips. He traced the line of her lower lip, his hand already familiar with the pillowy softness, sometimes breaking a deep kiss to simply touch her bruised and puffed lip in awe that this was real. Natsu didn't think he'd ever get bored of touching Lucy, or watching her, or even just feeling her presence at his side. "It's okay," she mouthed, keeping firmly tucked into him but wanting to speak to him still. A pang went through his chest as Natsu thought about how if he could hear they wouldn't have to do this, could just whisper to one another in the darkness of the night.
Natsu felt Lucy smile against his touch, her mouth gently pursing to press butterfly kisses against his fingers. Natsu returned the grin, nosing at her ear, lazy and sleepy. So what if they weren't normal? Lucy loved him, wholly even if sometimes he didn't feel whole himself. But Lucy was weird, and he loved her weirdness most of all.
"What were you thinking about?" Lucy asked, Natsu feeling the words as they left her, gently caressing his touch and leaving him breathless as the intimacy of the feeling crashed over him. No one would ever know Lucy like he knew her, how her words felt on his fingers, or how she smelt like a meadow at noon when all of her perfumes and showers were washed away by the end of the day and she laid in their bed.
"Stuff," Natsu said. He laughed to himself as Lucy huffed in irritation, muffling it in the back of her neck when she nipped at his fingers in retaliation. "You," he said, softer. Lucy stilled in his arms, smiling gently. Natsu took a steadying breath, emboldened by the darkness around them and his hiding place in the crook of Lucy's shoulder. "How much I love you. How wonderful and weird you are. How you make me feel weird, but good weird. You weird. Weird in all the ways I've never felt before, and normal for all the things I haven't. You make me brave, and happy. You give me something to look forward to. You let me love you in the ways I can and are patient while I learn new ways. I…" Natsu trailed off, humiliation catching up to his ranting tongue. Lucy didn't need to be bothered by all of these feelings of his, had better things to be doing like sleeping or thinking her own thoughts. Not having Natsu shove his own on her. Natsu calmed his racing mind to Lucy's pounding heartbeat, her breath stuttering with each inhale. She breathed his name, and Natsu shivered in turn, something heavy curling in his gut at the way Lucy held his name so tenderly on her lips.
"You sweet, dumb boy. Don't get all shy on me after saying stuff like that. It's not fair." Lucy mumbled, nuzzling into his hand with a large smile.
"Why isn't it fair?" Natsu asked, slipping his leg between Lucy's as he pulled her closer to him, their hearts falling into synchronization easily.
"Because no one should be able to be that perfect." Lucy said, her words humming on his fingers.
"I'm not perfect," Natsu mumbled himself, unsure if he really wanted Lucy to hear him. They'd had many conversations like this over the months that they had been together and the months before that, and sometimes Natsu believed her. Other times, he didn't.
The easy feeling from before slipped away as Lucy tensed, her mouth pushing out in a firm pout in the way it always did when she and Natsu bickered. Her thighs clenched on Natsu's, trapping him as her other hand tangled with his that had slipped under Lucy's side and was resting over the soft skin of her stomach where her sleep shirt had rode up. "You are perfect Natsu," Lucy said, forceful and certain, an aura of confidence and stubbornness radiating from her. "Perfectly imperfect. There is not a single thing I would change about you, you got that?"
"Aye, sir," Natsu breathed, pressing a soft and lingering kiss to the nape of her neck. He pressed a second, and then a third, and a fourth and a fifth beside it, allowing himself to simply move as he wished at the love blooming in his chest at Lucy's belief in him. She made him feel invincible and loved, and all he wanted in this moment of theirs was to make her even better than she let him feel.
Lucy relaxed back into him, a low sound resonating in her chest as she pressed into his kisses. Natsu stuttered over a kiss as her legs fell open, inviting him closer. Tentatively Natsu pressed his thigh up, feeling the heat of her core on his bare skin, only the thin layers of her underwear and sleep shorts separating them. Lucy made the same groan as she slowly rocked on his thigh, the heat in his gut tightening as he hardened at the feeling of Lucy moving against him and the taste of her skin on his lips. He stopped his kisses when Lucy took hold of his hand again, gently moving it away from her lips and leading him to trail over her body before nestling between her thighs. She cupped his hand, giving him a reassuring squeeze as she settled them over the heat his thigh was currently pressed against.
Natsu's throat dried as he moved his fingers along her slit, feeling her easily through her clothes with unsure strokes. He became more confident with each roll of her hips and twitch of her body, chasing his touch in a way that went straight to Natsu's cock.
Holding his breath Natsu lifted his hand, grip biting into Lucy's stomach with his one hand while the other slowly pushed between Lucy's bare skin and the soft cotton of her shorts and underwear, waiting for any sign from Lucy that she wanted him to stop. It didn't come, Lucy's thighs parting more and her hand reaching back and fisting at his boxers as Natsu resettled over her dripping core. Natsu groaned at the feeling, an instinctive noise he couldn't hear himself but pulled a shiver and hitch in breath from Lucy. Natsu kissed her ear, middle finger slipping between her soaked folds and curls feeling how soft and velvety and good the heat there was. He felt the nub at the top, moving two fingers over it in tight circles. He grinned into her hairline as Lucy arched into him, his touches roughening and pulling wilder reactions from Lucy, just like he wanted.
His cock ached, Natsu slow as he rocked against Lucy's back. Now was about Lucy, he could deal with himself later after he had satisfied the girl in his arms. Natsu held her pinned to him, slowing his rubbing on her clit to allow Lucy a chance to breath, teasing her on the edge of an orgasm. She squirmed in his arms, Natsu feeling the breath leave her in a gasp when he pushed a finger deep into her, rough and sudden like he knew she loved.
"I like the way you feel," Natsu purred into her ear. The shiver that trailed along her body as Natsu shifted them so he laid partially under her made a smug pride sit in his chest. He nipped at her ear, Lucy arching into him as her legs fell further apart, calling to him. Lucy clenched tightly around his fingers as he pushed a second one in, stretching her and feeling her molten heat coat his digits, her wetness dripping down his hand with each rough thrust into her. "So good, Luce."
Lucy's legs clamped around Natsu's hand at his words, a soft and demanding touch making Natsu snarl as it surrounded his cock, Lucy's hand having pushed through the opening of his boxers and gripped his straining cock. She rolled her palm over his slick head before stroking him, each pump matching Natsu's in a lewd harmony. Natsu felt Lucy's moan as he pressed a deep kiss to the hollow behind her ear, nipping at her skin and tasting her, his hips rocking into her hand eagerly while his own fingers curled on the spot inside her that made her arch and writhe in his arms, her mouth falling open in a scream Natsu would give anything to know.
Lucy's hand released his cock, raising to push against Natsu's chest and he let himself fall back. His breath was caught in his throat, unsure how to ask if Lucy was alright, what had he done, he was sorry he'd never do it again if Lucy just told him what was wrong. Natsu blinked, the confusion and anxiety leaving as quickly as it had crashed over him. Lucy grinned brightly, settling over his lap while her hands sat flat on his chest as she completely un-subtly felt him up. He returned her smile with a smirk of his own, fisting at her hips, greedily feeling her curves under his touch and the grounding reminder that this was real and she was his and she wanted him to be hers. He pulled his lip between his teeth as Lucy ground on him, her head falling back and the air pushed from her lungs. She repeated the heavy rocks, growing more bold with each movement.
Natsu opened his eyes when Lucy pulled her thumb over the swollen flesh of his lower lip, blinking in surprise at the realization that they had closed at some point.
"I want you," Lucy signed, her heated and flushed expression backlit from the moon and starlight that had filtered through the blinds, the clouds that had allowed them to be surrounded by darkness disappearing sometime between Natsu waking up and now, unnoticed in the focusing effect Lucy had on him.
Natsu nodded dumbly, unsure what else to do with the knowledge of Lucy wanting to have sex with him. While they were both familiar with each other's bodies and were no stranger to exploring them, they hadn't had sex yet. Exhaustion here, Lucy being too good with her mouth there, Natsu fearing that he couldn't live up to Lucy's past experiences in general, or a thousand other reasons. Not that he'd told her that. Natsu washed the worry away forcibly, smiling into the giddy kiss Lucy was pressing against him. He opened his mouth, swiping his tongue along the seam of her mouth and eagerly pushing in when she opened for him. Her hair was soft as Natsu fisted at it, easily tangling between and around his fingers as if all of her were trying to trap him, never allowing him the chance to freak out and run.
They had experienced Natsu's gut reaction to that the first time Lucy had told him she loved him.
If it hadn't been for Lucy's unnerving levels of forgiveness and determination to track him down to the airport two days later, their relationship might have ended before it even began.
But now wasn't a time to focus of Natsu's past dumbass mistakes, not when he had the sweet-sour taste of Lucy on his tongue and the feeling of her body on his, their stomachs and hips touching where her shirt was slowly riding higher and higher, tempting Natsu's wandering fingers. A call Natsu didn't deny, tracing the feeling of her ribs and the curves of her sides as he guided her shirt upwards. Lucy pulled back, giving him a wry and amused smile as she pulled off her shirt, baring herself to Natsu fully.
Her hair caught in the barely-there light, more spun silver than gold and stealing his breath. She was gorgeous, this person who had somehow decided that Natsu was worth showing this view. That he was worth anything. She almost glowed, her own soft light radiating from the inside out, an ethereal beauty that reminded Natsu of the way his father would talk about devis. Their shape unimportant, but the feelings they exuded to those around them the true signifiers. The hope. The light.
A light Natsu could never find the words to admit how much he needed. He was always better with simpler thoughts, and so it was that train he allowed to steer him instead.
"So pretty," Natsu sighed softly, smirking absently at the flush that raced along Lucy's shoulders and neck at his words. He was more focused on simply looking at her, though. The swell of her breasts, and the way her pale skin was dotted with the barest hint of freckles all over, Natsu's mouth growing more desperate with each second to kiss each one. Natsu ran the side of his finger over her right nipple, gentle as he pulled a shiver from Lucy that wracked her whole body. She fell into his hands when he led her down to him, gently resting on her hip and the nape of her neck as Natsu met her part way down, kissing her hard enough to leave her breathless when his head finally met the pillow again. Her expression was glazed, a soft blush blooming across her cheeks and nose catching Natsu's attention before she was the one crashing into him, her tongue running along the top row of his teeth and sliding along his in ways that felt both familiar and brand new.
Natsu rocked against her slowly, savouring the feeling of her so close to him. He lifted her, pushing her higher up his chest as he bent his legs, the action of spreading his own thighs to brace himself better spreading hers even further apart, bringing her core tighter against his eager cock. He could feel her wetness through both of their shorts, hot and inviting and slick.
Lucy twitched in his arms when he rolled them over, the air cooler than before as it brushed against his slick-soaked cock, the fabric of his boxers sticking to him. Natsu ignored it, able to breathe without the weight of Lucy so close to him. Natsu was almost embarrassed by how hard he was, wanted to give himself more time to focus on Lucy. And that he did, kissing along her collarbone and neck, tracing her wide smile with his lips before pushing his tongue into her eagerly accepting mouth. Natsu groaned in turn when he felt her moan hum through where their lips and tongues met, her whole body arching into his touch as Natsu fondled one of her breasts. She was so soft, skin firm but still pliant under his exploring searches, familiar with the heavy weight in his palm but still eager to discover all Lucy had to offer.
Natsu remembered her freckles as he drew a thumb over a tight nipple, rolling the hard nub in time to Lucy's shaking breaths. He pulled back from the kiss, drawing his tongue along the column of her neck, following the constellations on her skin, separated with teasing kisses and bites. Lucy had called the darker dots over his own face and shoulders constellations once, forgetting Natsu could read lips as well as he could. But if anyone was a star, it was Lucy, his own star that would guide him home no matter how lost he felt.
Lucy's nail dragging along his back fogged his head, Natsu feeling his sounds in his chest that she pulled from him. He pulled back, something hot and dense coiling in his chest at the red splotches blooming on her milky skin from his mouth, markings that would last for days to come. The feeling of Lucy watching him pulled his gaze to her face, the heat pooling even deeper in his gut at the breathless expression her wore. Her rich brown eyes were like melted chocolate, hooded and glazed with desire.
The breath was pushed from Natsu's lungs when Lucy reached down, gripping his cock once more. She worked his shaft, her hand warm and soft and wrapped so tightly on him that Natsu saw lights dance across his vision. He dropped his forehead to the crook of Lucy's neck, panting and grinding his hips into her fist. A whine pulled from Natsu when she let go of him, lifting his head to pout at her and ask why she had stopped.
"Natsu," Lucy signed, her name sign for him making a different kind of warmth send his heart fluttering in his chest like a damn school girl. "I want you. I'm ready. I want to have sex Natsu. I want you to fuck me."
Natsu stared at her dumbly, her face bright red and eyes cast away, but her lips pulled up in an embarrassed smile and her hands unshaken. She was being blunt and open and honest, something Natsu knew was difficult for her to be about things like this. He moved without thinking, ducking to press a kiss to her. He swallowed her chirp of surprise, grinning as Lucy gave into his kiss happily. He pulled back, moving his hand through her hair once to push back the golden wisps that hid her from him partially. "I want you too, Lucy."
He signed her name with a different motion than usual, the 'W' sign moving from right to left across his face with three pulses meaning 'weird' replaced by his right hand partially over his chin, all fingers out except for his middle finger flicking off his thumb twice. 'Light.'
Lucy beamed at him, her arms thrown around his neck as she pulled him into a deep kiss.
Natsu forgot about the world as he kissed her, his name slipping away with where they were, and what the future held even in the next minute, all of his attention stolen by the girl in his arms. He traced the roof of her mouth with his tongue, crushing his body down against hers, her arms tightening around his neck and nails dragging along his scalp in a sharp pain-pleasure before she fisted at his hair and bit at his lip ring. Natsu opened his eyes, watching Lucy's devious smile flicker in her self-impressed gaze, a smirk pulling up a corner of her mouth as she tugged on his piercing teasingly.
They rolled over yet again, Natsu dropping a leg to steady himself from falling fully off their bed. The floor was cold on his bare foot, the chill creeping over the rest of him as Lucy pulled back. She gave him a wide smile, her back half hiding what she was doing in her nightstand after she turned to it. Natsu kept his smile even as his ribs began to tighten on his lungs, sure it was just anticipation that was making his hands sweaty and his stomach lurch into his throat.
And then Lucy turned around, smile bright and hair mused, with a little silver foil packet between two fingers.
Condoms were used for sex. Real sex. Which meant this was real. Natsu was really about to have sex. He thought he'd feel more excited, desperate to ravage her and claim her. Instead, Natsu felt a little ill, like the world was turning around as if he was on one of those fucked roller coasters Gray tried to drag him onto. He couldn't stop looking at the packet, so small and innocuous. Natsu hated it. His skin felt itchy, like when he touched wet velvet or drank orange juice after brushing his teeth. Wrong. Bad.
Natsu jerked when something touched his knee, blinking at Lucy. Her eyebrows were knit in worry, her lips wrapping around his name from instinct despite knowing Natsu couldn't hear it. "What's wrong?" Lucy signed. Natsu looked at where her knees dipped the blankets around them, the silver packet slipping along the sheet and resting against her. He shifted further off the bed, raising his gaze to meet Lucy's increasingly confused and anxious one.
"We can't have sex."
Lucy jerked at his voice, her fingers biting into his thigh. She spoke as well, searching his face for any hint of what may have changed in the seconds that her back was turned. Her lower lip trembled just the barest amount and Natsu's heart went from his throat to the floor. "I don't understand-"
"We're not married."
The words left him without thinking, Natsu feeling just as shocked as Lucy looked. Even though he'd never had the thought before, it felt right. Natsu couldn't imagine himself doing anything like… that, before marriage. Bewilderment made her gape at him, though Natsu could still see the hurt beneath it. He was desperate to make her understand, to take that hurt away that he had caused. "I- we can't, it's not- it's not right? To have sex unwed? I-" Natsu stumbled over his words, switching to signing instead. He didn't know when he'd sat up, or when he'd shifted to only half be on the bed. Part of him was screaming to run. To not have to do this, to hurt her or think about why he felt like this. It would be so much easier to not, just like it had been easier to flee instead of confronting how much Lucy had come to mean to him. How much he loved, adored, needed her when she'd told him she loved him. But he wouldn't do that again. He'd nearly lost her before, and he'd be damned if he lost their future together because he was too chicken shit to stay and talk. The wetness welling in her eyes was crushing though, and Natsu couldn't bear to watch the anger that was sure to come as he crashed and burned trying to articulate or even understand his feelings.
"It's not something I can do," Natsu signed, his hands shaking slightly, Natsu concentrating on the tremors instead of watching Lucy's expression. "I-" he faltered, squeezing his hands in fists before restarting. "I'm not even that attached to my fucking heritage. I don't go to temple except for when Igneel makes me, I don't pray, I play up the deaf shit to avoid doing mantras. I haven't even fucking been to India!" Natsu fisted at his hair, running his hands through it to give himself time to collect his thoughts. To figure out where the fuck he was going with this rant.
Lucy cupped the side of his head, gentle as she curled her fingers through his hair. Comforting. His star home. Natsu lifted his head, feeling his eyes prick as he saw her small smile. "But it's still part of me. The teachings, the rules, it's how Igneel taught me to live. With my truth, and that what we do, here and now, matters in our next lives. It's there." Natsu pressed a hand against his chest. Over his heart. His soul. Lucy's hand covered his, her fingers interlinking with his easily.
"And I love you, because of how you live. Because of who you are. I would never ask you to change a single thing Natsu." Lucy said, leaning into him. Her forehead pressed against his, and Natsu's eyes fluttered shut, all the panic he didn't know he'd been holding floating away.
"I know," he whispered. Lucy pressed into him, and Natsu knew she had heard him.
She kissed his forehead and Natsu fell into her. He pushed her back so they both laid on the bed, Natsu tucked under her chin as she ran her hands through his hair. Time passed easily as Natsu curled his arms around her, hugging her body tight to his. He nuzzled into her neck, breathing in deeply and letting the smell of her skin soothe him. Everything was okay. Lucy had understood. He should have known she would have, Lucy was amazing.
Natsu hadn't met many people growing up, Igneel pulling him from first year of primary school after Natsu had let slip how often the teacher had made Natsu sit in the corner for disrupting class or not answering correctly or mispronouncing a word or looking at her wrong. Had said he was unruly and a 'problem child', not living up to her expectations. Igneel had nearly burnt down her house, which Natsu found out by watching his father talk on the phone. But Natsu wouldn't trade being homeschool for anything, even if the only people he had really known were his cousins and aunts and uncles. Natsu wondered how different he would have been if he'd known Lucy all those years like he felt he did. His mind drifted to Lucy as she ran her nails along the back of his neck and pulled a gentle shiver from him, her heartbeat and breath rhythmic against his cheek.
Lucy had been homeschooled -or tutored, as rich people called it- until she was fourteen, when she had convinced her father to let her go to private school at least. She had said it had been strict and more conservative than she would have liked, but at least it had been a boarding school so it was easier to sneak out of than her home. He thought about how their lessons would have been different, if her teachers were just as easily distracted as his father had been. What subjects they had been taught.
Natsu jerked up from Lucy, the -unfortunately- familiar feeling of anxiety squeezing his chest. Natsu hadn't had the sex talk until he was about fifteen, in which Igneel had sat Natsu down with Aunty Grandeeney and promptly fled the house for the next two hours. His aunt had been … informative. And blunt. As would be expected of a medical professional, but from what Natsu had gathered from his cousins' and friends' accounts of their public school sex ed it had been less than useful. And then what he had read about conservative teachings…
"I don't think you're a piece of used gum!"
Lucy blinked at him, patiently waiting for him to explain what the fuck this latest outburst was about.
"I was thinkin' and remembered what I'd read about how shit like boarding schools are with sex education and that fucking video with the shoes on their wedding night and- You know I don't care? It's not- it's not that I think people are bad if they have sex because that's the stupidest idea I've ever heard and I've done shots with Gajeel and that bastard thinks he's a genius when he's one ounce of tequila away from dying and I don't like, care if you've had sex before because it has no fuckin' bearing on you who are as a person. Well, I mean, I care but not in a judgey or gross way like you're going to hell or whatever or- I mean, it's, a me thing? Like I can't have sex before marriage because apparently I care about the gods perception of me, which, who knew? But I'm not saying-" Natsu stopped talking when Lucy pressed a finger to his lips, taking a breath he hadn't realized he'd needed.
"I know, Natsu." Lucy signed, taking her hand back and giving him a fond smile. "I know you love me, and you would never look down on me for anything. You're a good person, I wouldn't love you if you weren't."
Natsu felt his breath catch in his throat, emotions he couldn't hope to name swelling inside him like a tsunami on one of those Natural Geographic disaster shows Lucy watched. He pulled Lucy up to him, sitting in the middle of the bed and seating Lucy in his lap. "Besides, it's not like we're never going to have sex. I've waited six months since we started dating, what's another two years?" Lucy's easy grin faltered slightly as she sighed for 'year', her nose scrunching and motions falling off in thinly concealed resignation.
"What?" Natsu signed, watching her roll her eyes at his simple motion.
"I mean, I kind of assumed we were going to get married. After we graduate," Lucy signed pointedly, blush creeping back onto her cheeks.
"You've thought this much about it?" Natsu asked, throat growing dry at Lucy's shy nod. "About sex or…" he trailed off, hands falling into Lucy's lap. Her head jerked with a snort, Natsu flushing under her amused look.
"Marriage, obviously you dork. You haven't?" She asked, not overly disappointed or shocked when he shook his head 'no'. But now he was, and what he was imagining felt more like a fantasy than a very real possibility. Being met by Lucy and Makarov and Laxus as he got off the stupid horse Igneel had somehow managed to rent, Lucy's hands covered in swirling henna designs that Wendy and Grandeeney had decorated her pale skin with, Natsu's mother's jewels and bracelets a gift from Igneel. He knew Lucy had probably always pictured a white ball gown that would make her look like a princess, but when Natsu thought of seeing Lucy at the ceremony, the most beautiful red and gold sari was the only thing he could imagine, the patterns extravagant and beautiful just like the Bollywood movies he would watch with Igneel when he was a kid. Both signing and speaking English and Sanskrit as they make their vows. The walks around the fire.
Natsu had never really cared about all the ceremonial shit before, but now, as he thought about doing it all with Lucy, he found he did want the whole grand ceremony. The three day event, all of his cousins and aunts and uncles and friends there, the wild party and feast afterwards.
And it wasn't just some fantasy, or scene from a movie.
It could be real.
Natsu tackled Lucy to the bed, crushing his mouth against hers as he kissed her. His fiance. She wanted to be with him forever. Thought Natsu was good enough to bind her soul to. His. His. Natsu laughed as Lucy pushed back against his shoulder, beaming down at her as he relented, her face coloured with surprise in the moonlight still streaming into the room. She was so beautiful, and his, she wanted to be his! Natsu couldn't stop himself from dipping back down to her and stealing kisses along the swell of her cheek. He was just so happy.
Lucy squirmed under him, Natsu pulling back once more, getting the feeling that Lucy wanted to speak to him. Her smile was one of confusion, searching Natsu's face for any explanation of the kiss. Natsu would have felt bad for her dealing with all his mood swings if Lucy wasn't the exact same. "What was that for?"
"Because I love you. Because we're engaged-"
"Plan on being engaged," Lucy corrected quickly. Natsu ignored it, already as good as having picked out her ring in his mind, and the joy dancing in her eyes and the way her lips pulled up unwittingly let him know exactly where she stood on the subject. Natsu stared down at her, taking a moment to let everything sink in. She was so beautiful, her hair splayed out on the sheets and the sheer adoration in her gaze as she looked at Natsu. He ran a thumb over her lower lip, feeling her breath puff against him sending shivers along his spine and heat pooling in his gut. She wanted him. Lucy wanted Natsu, and he wanted her so much he ached.
Lucy tilted into his kiss, her arms winding around his neck, her fingers tangling tighter in the hair at the back of his neck with each half second break they took for breath. Natsu's tongue slid along her lower lip, pulling back when Lucy's own flicked at his piercing. She rolled it over before pressing into his mouth, tasting Natsu as she tightened her arms on him. Natsu's hand slipped low, holding her side and feeling her ribs expand under her fingers, his other arm placed beside her head, his forearm dipping into the soft fabric of the blanket to stop himself from completely crushing Lucy. Lucy's shaking inhale made Natsu groan, falling towards her as if his body was caught in the gravity of hers. She was warm and soft under him, her skin addicting as it rubbed along his. Natsu pressed his thigh between hers, tight to her heat. Lucy arched, gasping into Natsu's mouth when he moved into her canting hips, her nails clawing at his back.
Natsu's hand shifted lower, and Lucy pushed back on his shoulders. She clung to him, keeping him only a few inches above her as she spoke, her lips wrapping each syllable with love. "What happened to waiting?"
"I don't want to anymore," Natsu growled, Lucy's hooded eyes widening and her pupils expanding to swallow almost all of the chocolate that coloured her gaze usually. Natsu was stopped from returning to their kiss by Lucy's nails digging into his shoulders, keeping him far enough away to read her lips, but not a hair further.
"But we're not married. I don't- What changed?"
"We're going to be married eventually, and I have you here and now. I don't waste opportunities as good as this Luce. I'm not missing a single thing with you," Natsu spoke softly, his thumb rubbing along Lucy's bare skin in the rhythm of her heart. "I want you." He jerked when he saw tears well in Lucy's eyes, floundering over words to make her stop crying.
"Umf!" Natsu felt his noise catch in his throat as he was yanked back down to Lucy, her lips desperate as she kissed him. His eyes fluttered shut, losing himself in the moment. His mind cleared like when the world became too much and he was able to lose himself in the silence, Natsu feeling peace, truly and fully in Lucy's love.
Their kiss turned desperate and hot, each brush of Lucy's tongue along his a wave of desire and each graze of her fingertips along his back and arms an electric shock. Natsu nuzzled into the slope of her jaw, tasting the salt on her skin as he traced his tongue along the delicate line. Lucy's legs spread, allowing Natsu to fall closer to the bed. He loved how strong her thighs were, lowering a hand to feel her muscle flex and twitch as Lucy pulled their hips together, the air knocked from Natsu's lungs by the rush of lust from his cock rubbing against Lucy's covered core. He ached, desperate to be free of his boxers and to free Lucy of the rest of her clothes as well. Natsu rocked into her when Lucy bucked against him, just as eager to continue as he was.
Something cool brushed against Natsu's knee and he pulled back from nipping at Lucy's collar bone to look at it, his thumbs pausing under the band of her shorts. It was the condom from before, still just as innocent in it's unmarked silver package. Natsu pushed back the spike of his heart to his throat it still brought out of him, feelings from before easily overpowered by what he felt in his chest now. Natsu refused to be beat by a fucking condom, not when he was this close.
He snatched it from the bedding, holding it between his teeth and grinning down at Lucy. She blinked at him once, the lust -for him- clouding her gaze only a few seconds as she looked at Natsu. And then she was chortling, shoving Natsu's shoulder playfully. He rolled over, wagging his eyebrows at her and keeping his grin. He was pretty sure she mumbled the word 'dummy' to herself, but Natsu chirped happily instead of mentioning it when Lucy plucked the condom from his teeth, pressing a sweet kiss to him in replacement. Natsu fell back when she placed her hand on his chest and pushed, pinning Natsu to the sheets. Her grin was bright and salacious as she looked over him, taking her time as she raked her gaze over his bare body beneath her. The condom was quickly removed from its packet, the rubber clear and slick looking. Lucy's nose wrinkled a little at the slight lube transferred to her fingers and Natsu lost it, throwing back his head as his chest shook with laughter. She was so weird, grossed out by a little lube considering how much she wanted to fuck. Natsu might not have been a fan of porn but that didn't mean he hadn't watched some, and sex was bound to be a lot messier than a little lube on some fingers.
He continued to laugh even as Lucy swatted at his chest, wiping a tear from his eye when he finally looked at her. "Keep laughing and you'll be putting this on by yourself," Lucy signed, pouting at him. Natsu grinned at her in surrender, placing his hand on her thigh and giving her a soft squeeze. Lucy eyed him suspiciously, tugging off his boxers with a huff. Her gaze softened when she caught sight of his cock, his length all but twitching in need at the way Lucy bit her lip and gently trailed her fingers along the top of his thigh. Natsu's lungs ached from lack of air, unable to breathe as Lucy slowly reached for him. Natsu watched as her pale hand wrapped around his length, thin fingers stark against his own brown skin. He was also hoping that if he came from her just touching him Natsu would be able to make himself pass out to escape the humiliation.
Natsu thanked every god he could name as Lucy's grip tightened around his base, no spurt of cum making him crave an early death from the blissful contact of her hand on his shaft. She stroked him, tight and soft, a little dry but Natsu wasn't about to say shit. Her lips were gentle as she kissed him, more of a caress than anything. Full of love and passion, her body moulding to his as she leaned over him. Natsu moaned as her breasts held tight to him, Natsu's fingers twitching to grope and feel them spill between his fingers, or maybe bury his face in the softness and taste her at her most pure.
Coolness on his cock pulled a shiver from Natsu, the slickness unexpected. He could feel Lucy wrap her hand back around him, moving quicker as she pumped his length with her fist in tight strokes. She kissed his neck, her tongue flicking along his scar teasingly. Natsu gasped, fisting at the sheets as pleasure shot along his nerves like a wildfire, his pulse pounding in his cock and leaving his mind fogged. If her hand felt this good, Natsu was practically drooling thinking about what the rest of her might feel like. Lucy's hands joined his at tugging at her clothing, underwear and shorts discarded quickly and thrown carelessly off the bed, neither letting the other pull away from the other for too long.
With a grunt Natsu rolled them over, canting his hips lazily against the heat of Lucy's bare stomach. He didn't want to be helpless in the hands of Lucy their first time. He wanted to be the one to make her face twist in pleasure and her body writhe under him, wanted to have his right mind to sear every last second into his brain. Lucy grinned up at him, her chest shaking with a surprised giggle when he hooked his hands under her knees and pinned them beside her, Lucy spread and bare under him. Her nails raked through his hair, lashes fluttering coyly as she dragged her calf along his shoulder.
Natsu paused lining his head up with her entrance, his tip slick from dragging it along her dripping folds. Lucy held his gaze, her smile warm and open, no hint of hesitation as she waited for him. Never pushing. Waiting for Natsu to take the next step, in his own time. Fuck, did he love her. Natsu watched her face as best as he could as he pushed in, struggling to not completely lose himself in the feeling of her surrounding his cock. How soft and hot she felt inside, walls fluttering around her as he stretched her tightness, burying himself as deeply as he could inside her.
The sight of Lucy's face as he gathered himself was enough to nearly make him lose it again. Her eyes were open but unseeing, so much desperate need and lust filling them that Natsu felt pride burn through his blood, powerful. He wanted to kiss her lip, swollen from how hard she was biting it, struggling to silence the noises only she could hear. Natsu frowned, the blankets bunching between his fingers as he tightened his hold on where he had placed his hands beside her head. If he couldn't hear her, then dammit it he was going to watch her scream and thrash as he fucked her.
Lucy jolted under him, head thrown back as her own hands clawed at his shoulders, not expecting the deep and quick pace Natsu had chosen. Her hips met every thrust and grind he pushed against her, her body moving with his as they found their rhythm together. Flush spread across her chest and face, splotches of bright colour that told Natsu everything he needed to know, her face turned away from him and his pulse so loud in his head that he could almost swear he could hear it. Lucy looked at him, smile falling as her mouth opened into the most perfect 'o' Natsu had ever seen, eyes lidded heavy in pleasure, rocking against the sheets below them with each pump of his cock into her, feeling her tighten around him when he moved on the spot he had heard his friends talk about like it was a myth. But Natsu had found it, and drove his tip into it as hard as he could, desperate to feel Lucy cum on his cock. Because of his cock. Because of him.
Sharp pain dug into his hairline, Lucy holding onto him as she moved under him, her throat tight with each gasp and moan Natsu pulled from her that he couldn't fucking hear. A thought came to him, a way to know each quiver and whimper and scream he made Lucy release, and as he buried his cock into Lucy over and over and over again his body moved without thinking of anything other than what he needed, what was happening in the moment here and now.
His hand settled over her throat, feeling the way her pulse pounded and her vocal cords shook under the force of her scream. Her body arched towards his, thighs holding onto him desperately, her body spasming and clinging to his cock as she came. Natsu stilled above her, hand frozen and barely touching her, Lucy jerking under him for several seconds before she collapsed back to the bed. Natsu blinked the sweat from his eyes, his brain only firing at fifty percent and struggling to fully understand what had just happened.
She had been close, but not that close. And then Natsu had…
Natsu had touched her neck.
He watched her until she was able to look at him, Lucy still only half there, chest heaving for breath and her mouth left open. Natsu rested his hand more fully, not squeezing, but no longer just a featherlight touch either. Lucy's eyes widened, and Natsu pushed harder. He felt her tighten on his cock, body reacting in ways neither expected. Natsu felt her pulse thrum under his thumb, her gasp tickling him where he felt it move through her. Natsu started to move his hips again, pulling out almost fully before pushing back into her until their hips touched. He held eye contact with Lucy, pace slow as he moved. Her nails raked through his hair, and her skin was soft and sent waves of need straight to his cock as she moved her thighs over his hips, ankles crossing behind him as Lucy began to match his focused movements once more. He could feel each breath she took, the way her exhales shook when he pulled out of her, his cock dragging along her roughly.
He could feel the sounds he was pulling from her.
Natsu pushed into her harder, no longer taking his time. Each moan from Lucy was a little louder than the last, the vibrations a little stronger against the palm of his hand. Natsu sheathed himself inside her with even quicker strokes in return, both leading the other to go further in a game of cat and mouse that Natsu never wanted to stop. She was so good, so overwhelming that all Natsu could think of was molten fire and her heavy scent that was filling the room. How hot it was that she was getting off with his hand wrapped around her throat and his cock carving itself into her body. How erotic she looked, sex glazed expression and parted lips and mussed hair. Natsu kissed her, hard and needy. She returned the kiss just as desperately, her whines swallowed by Natsu's tongue while her arms wound around his neck again, holding him where she wanted him as he fucked her. She spilt between his fingers when he grabbed her hip, angling her as he drove his length into her, the pressure growing in his gut becoming unbearable and his cock aching for release, desperate to find that perfect spot.
He couldn't take much more, already half delirious, but Natsu knew he wanted to see her cum again if it was the last thing he did. Her breath was sweet as it filled his mouth, panting against one another's open parted lips, the kissing forgotten. The knot in Natsu's gut continued to tighten, a miracle that it hadn't broken yet, Natsu chasing it, just a little more, her hips a little higher, Natsu's cock a little deeper, her walls gripping him tighter than anything he had imagined was possible and so good. He knew somewhere in the back of his mind that there were better words to describe what he was feeling, but sogoodsogoodsogoodsogood were the only coherent thoughts he was capable of.
Natsu felt Lucy mumble against his lower lip, her words catching on his piercing. His name. She was saying his name, calling it like a prayer as he fucked her.
He couldn't help it anymore, dragging his lips over hers in a desperate attempt to kiss her as he came. Heat overcame him from inside, electricity and an indescribable pleasure filling his entire body from his gut to his fingertips. Haze left his mind white like an ocean breaking on the beach, shifting but unable to be held, easily lost in the swirling patterns that moved like nonsense within it.
He collapsed beside Lucy, nails firmly dug under his shoulder blades and her own body convulsing under his. He pulled his hand from her neck, brushing sweat soaked baby hairs from her forehead, his sense of touch fuzzy and his movements disjointed. Natsu felt like when he had accidentally fallen asleep in the sauna that one time, his limbs heavy and the world slow around him. It was much better now, though, and Natsu grinned as he nuzzled into Lucy's cheek.
Lucy's hands relaxed on his back when he pulled out of her, rolling onto his side and trapping one of her arms under him. He struggled to catch his breath, his heart still pounding but slowing to normal with every second. Natsu watched as Lucy caught her own breath, her head lolling to the side and meeting his gaze. He watched her giggle, breathless and exhausted but glowing in their bed. She shuffled, pulling her arm back and flopping onto his chest, her own face buried in his neck. Natsu knew there were things he had to do, like take off the condom, take a piss, help Lucy move away from where her own slickness and cum had left a wet spot on the sheets, but exhaustion was already calling to him and making it hard to keep his eyes open.
The bed dipped and shifted, cool air replacing the warmth that Lucy's body had been emitting seconds before. Natsu forced open an eye, watching Lucy slowly make her way to the bathroom a few steps down the hall. Completely naked. Natsu grinned, Lucy clearly not all there if was willing to risk Cana seeing her in this state. Or maybe she was too much in her right mind and had remembered that Cana was spending the night at Kagura's. Natsu's grin slipped away and he sat up, his joints protesting at being moved in their noodle-like state. Maybe it hadn't been that good for Lucy. Gods, Natsu hoped it was good for Lucy.
The condom was thrown in the trash along with several tissues, and a new blanket thrown over the spot on the bed that Lucy would make him sleep in if she noticed it by the time she made it back into the room. She collapsed on the bed, crawling up until she was nestled in Natsu's side. Natsu blinked at the ceiling. Well, Lucy was obviously exhausted, and the way she couldn't keep her hands off his chest and stomach with soft touches or tiny nonsense patterns drawn into him with her fingertip was definitely a positive thing. And as kind as Lucy was, Natsu didn't think she was the type to fake an orgasm. Or two.
Natsu settled into the bed smugly, slipping an arm under Lucy and pulling her to him. He'd made her cum twice. He bet none of the guys had made their partner cum twice their first time. Gray had probably never made anyone cum. And Natsu had made Lucy cum. Twice.
Natsu knew they should probably talk about the whole neck grabbing kink Lucy had just discovered about herself, or about if the sex had actually been as good as Natsu thought it had been, but right now Natsu didn't really have the mental energy for all that. Instead, he was content to snuggle under the blanket Lucy had half-heartedly pulled over them and pretend he didn't have a research report he should really be starting this weekend. There would be time for all that stuff later. They had all the time in the world.
They were engaged.
Well, they would be engaged once Natsu found a ring good enough for Lucy. And a way to pay for it. He wondered if the security around the geological department's compression oven was really that good. Lucy may act like money didn't mean anything to her anymore, but Natsu knew her well enough to know she wouldn't turn down a nice shiny diamond.