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beyond your wildest dreams (please keep me out of reach)

Chapter Text

[wow look at us normal human beings]

spork, baby bitch, snek, woozi, dom, estic, undad, ji.soo, emo, criminal, naEga hosh


spork: guys

spork: i just got ciheken pot pie and i need a spork

spork: any of you have a spork ?

naEga hosh: cant you get your dormmate to sommon on ?

naEga hosh: *summon *one

naEga hosh: i hate my keyboard

snek: i have a spork

snek: but you're a floor below me so i don't eel like giving ot to you

ji.soo: i have a spork!

dom: i can literally summon a spork for you kwannie whats ur problem

spork: i mean

spork: we have the dorm crew coming down the hallwayu soon bc of a suspicious rat infestation

criminal: i swear i can explain

snek: save it

snek: you bloodsucker

criminal: i can't belie youre still salty abt this

criminal: it was ive years ago

criminal: i bought you a new hamster

snek: no new hamster could ever replace chica

spork: ,,,,,,,well anywys

spork: i dontwnt you getting exposed and killed, mungy

spork: mingyu

spork: you know ur such a clumsy person and iworry smtms

spork: ive known you since our freshman yr of high school

dom: uve been spending too much time with jeonghan

snek: u called?

dom: fucking snake

dom: dont act like youve not been making me get you vanilla ice cream from questionable places

dom: i may be out of mind but im certainly not out of touch

snek: idk what ur talking abt, mingyu

snek: i'm an angel i would never use my powers for my own personal gain

woozi: guys you shits

[woozi has removed 'baby bitch' from the chat]

woozi: are your hearts made of stone?

woozi: chan's still in the fucking hospital and he's still in this chat

woozi: you really think watching us have fun is going to help him recover ?

woozi: smh

emo: o h  my god i forgot abt chan

emo: hyung is he okay

woozi: no thanks to you guys

woozi: but he should be out within another month

snek: shit woozi i'm sorry

snek: i completely forgot

snek: guys who wants to visit him over the weekend

woozi: you can't

woozi: we're not allowed contact for another two weeks

woozi: y'all can call his therapists though

naEga hosh: im running to my phone

undad: aren't you holding yur phone rn, hosh?

naEga hosh: im dialing the number

snek: tbh the real question is

snek: if you can just levitate shit

snek: why are you running

naEga hosh: sshhh i'm on the phone

snek: well while he's talking

snek: @spork how's your dilemma

spork: oh

spork: jisoo hying brought me a soprk

ji.soo: indeed

ji.soo: also @woozi i'm sorry abt chan, I completely forgot

woozi: tbh i expected more from you hyung

woozi: but it's ok

spork: guys the rat crew is here

spork: fuck

spork: fuck

spork: fuck

snek: shit

woozi: damn

woozi: but what what's wrong

spork: guys they have voiders

spork: i have voids all over this dorm

spork: i stink of void

estic: don't diss the void like that

estic: it has a nice flowery scent

estic: but still, that's,,,,,, that's bad

estic: wdo we need to move?

spork: im runnig

spork: oh

spork: i guess im not running

spork: i guess

spork: i think

spork: i think i showed up on their tracker

spork: i feel wei

[spork has left the chat]

snek: fuck that's code red

snek: everyone out

undad: i'm heading to his dorm now

undad: @dom you okay

dom: i have kwannie

dom: voiders do bad things to humans

dom: and to voids i guess lol

dom: i feel kinda fnny too but i've not passed out xD

undad: i'm here where are you

dom: behind te building

undad: okay i'm coming i've got you mingyu everything's going to be okay

criminal: um,,,,,,, guys

criminal: i just got an anonymous email telling me to leave my dorm

criminal: it's the fbi or smth?

undad: i'm in your bedroom get in i'm hopping you out

criminal: i feel weird

ji.soo: whatever you do, junnie

ji.soo: don't open that email.

criminal: don't open it?

ji.soo: no

criminal: why?

ji.soo: you remember why chan's in the hospital, right?

criminal: oh

criminal: oh shit


[chinese sugababs]

criminal: guys

criminal: i need you to go to the cafe on that one street by the music building

chips and crackers: what

chips and crackers: why

criminal: chan's walker is awake