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Flickers

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“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

Furihata stiffened. It was subtle but it didn’t go unnoticed. Akashi looked at him, puzzled by his reaction.

“What’s wrong, Kouki?” Akashi said, concerned.

Furihata didn’t say anything. He just looked at his boyfriend, his gaze intense. Akashi met his eyes for a moment before looking down slightly. He was never one to back down over whatever it was that was thrown at him and yet, here he is, having trouble holding someone’s gaze on him. Furihata is the only one who could do this and he would never get used to it.

“No.. it’s just—this is the first time I heard you say it,” Furihata’s expression softened, “I’m just surprised, is all—and relieved too… I guess.”

Akashi head shot up and saw a warm smile this time. That is one hell of beautiful smile right there, Akashi thought, but there was something wrong in those words he just heard.

“What are you talking about? I’ve been saying it—”

Akashi paused. Oh. Oh.

Has he… never said those words out loud? He was sure he said, “I love you” whenever he thought about Furihata, which is maybe more than a thousand times at this point, also daily. But apparently, according to Furihata, he never said it to him before today. He said it over and over… only in his head (and heart) but never out loud. And his boyfriend is not a mind reader, so,

“I’m an idiot,” he muttered.

Furihata chuckled. He was about to say something when Akashi interrupted him.

“I’m so sorry, Kouki,” Akashi stood up and deeply bowed, “this is not in any way acceptable, I hope… I hope you find it in yourself to forgive me.”

Furihata eyes widened. He stood up and touched Akashi’s shoulder gently, urging him to stop bowing.

“What are you doing, Sei?” Furihata said, laughing softly, “it’s no big deal.”

“It is!”

Furihata was taken aback by such extreme reaction. Akashi straightened and looked at him intensely.

“It’s not okay! I can’t believe I never said such important words to you before today, when I heard it so many times from you. I couldn’t… I couldn’t imagine how you must felt,” Akashi shook his head, looking disappointed, “I’m the worst. I’m so sorry, Kouki.”

Furihata was speechless. Trust it to Akashi to overreact over something so trivial like this. The fact that he never said those words out loud made him insecure sometimes, but he always knew that his love for Akashi is not one-sided. His boyfriend’s action whenever they were together shows that Akashi loves him just as much as he does Akashi. But it felt strangely warm, knowing that Akashi was that concerned about hurting his feeling though they both knew it wasn’t intentional.

“Let me make it up to you,” Akashi said, giving Furihata a hopeful look.

Furihata answered in an instant.

“Say it again then.”

“Huh?”

“Say it again,” Furihata demanded, though a slight teasing tone could be heard in his voice.

Akashi chuckled.

“I love you.”

“Again.”

“I love you, Kouki,” Akashi said more firmly and seriously this time.

“Again.”

“I love you so much, Furihata Kouki.”

Furihata, against his better judgement, started to blush (he couldn’t believe it, he was the one who started this goddammit), so he opted to rest his face on Akashi’s shoulder to hide his blush (and because he wanted physical contact). Akashi run his fingers through his hair and Furihata sighed contentedly.

“Again.”

Akashi smiled. This is going to be a long day (not that he minded, after all, he was just saying the truth, and saying it as many times as Furihata wanted is the least he could do).