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In My Feelings

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“I told you, Negan, I don't share.” Carl crossed his arms over his slim chest and rested back into the dark couch cushions.

 

He was visibly pissed as hell at Negan, but he'd never admit that. Admission of such things would make the little cowboy feel petty and he was determined that Negan wouldn't view him as he did his obnoxiously vapid wives.

 

Just moments ago, the kid had walked in, without knocking, and got an eyeful of Negan fucking one of those vapid wives senseless. Shocked didn't begin to cover the emotions Negan had seen flit across his face. He'd probably been a little harsh when he'd yelled at him to get the fuck out, but he'd literally been caught with his pants down.

 

“Seriously?” Negan's gaze hardened as he lit a cigarette, eyes narrowing in on his reoccurring guest. Carl was becoming more and more outspoken with him, more petulant since he realized he was above the punishments Negan usually doled out. He knew he was safe which was causing a tick of irritation to form in his brow. “What? Are you jealous?”

 

“Mm, more like possessive.” Carl confessed with a smirk, biting his lip as he rose and slowly made his way around the coffee table partition separating them. “You're mine.”

 

“Am I now?” Negan reclined back, crossing his leg knee to ankle, watching his future serial killer with an amused grin. He exhaled a long cloud of smoke with his next words. “I'm pretty sure I'm the one who owns you.”

 

“You just wish you did.” The teen purred, moving closer, their boots bumping together. He made sure he had Negan's full attention before speaking again. “I want you to get rid of your wives.”

 

“Who the hell do you think you are?” Negan was starting to get really annoyed now. He didn't mind the sass and the princess complex the boy seemed to have secretly hidden in him somewhere, but this, this was a huge overstep. He was about to rise to his own feet, when a small hand pressed at the center of his chest to keep him where he was. He arched an eyebrow in warning, which went almost completely ignored.

 

“I don't care how you do it, put them to work elsewhere,” A nonchalant shrug of a bony shoulder. “Kill them, whatever, but as long as you're seeing them, you won't be seeing me.”

 

“Oh really?” This little kid was riding way too high and Negan was itching to knock him off his fuckin' horse. “You think your skinny little twink ass can make up for ten wives?”

 

“Tell me, Negan--” A long leg swung across the older man's as Carl settled himself onto Negan's lap, rolling his hips. He ran elegant fingers over Negan's broad chest and plucked the cigarette from between his lips, a little grin playing at his full lips as Carl took a drag. He leaned back to set the cigarette in the ashtray, smoke curling languidly around each syllable as he spoke. “Name one wife who sucks your dick better than I do.” His fingers ran lower, slowly pulling the tab of Negan's zipper down, hand slipping inside and grasping his cock. The boy leaned in closer to whisper hot against his ear. “Name one wife whose pussy is tighter than mine.”

 

“Fuck, baby...” Negan groaned, eyes slipping shut sluggishly before flicking back up to Carl's. “You're playing goddamn dirty and you know it.”

 

“You're just mad because you know I'm right.” Sharp little teeth attached themselves to Negan's earlobe giving a playful tug. “No one else, right? Nobody makes you feel like I do...nobody lets you fuck them like I do.”

 

“No dice, angel cakes, I'm not getting rid of my wives.” No words had ever been harder to say, with Carl's hot little body rubbing all over him and that skilled hand still stroking his cock.

 

“Alright then.” Carl shrugged again and hopped off Negan's lap making his way to the door without so much as looking back.

 

“Whoa, now what the fuck? Carl!” Negan bellowed, stuck to his spot on the sofa. He wasn't sure what the hell just happened, one minute he had a lap full of Carl and the next, the boy was stalking off in a huff. Fuck, he really was worse than some of his wives. “Get over here and finish what you fuckin' started!” He gestured to his cock jutting prominently out of his fly still at full attention.

 

Carl rounded on him so fast it was dizzying, those wild eyes looking Negan up and down like he was trying to pick the best place to slip his blade into. Not for the first time, Negan could see how dangerous his boy was. “I told you—I. Don't. Share.” The teen's voice was blanketed with ice, one last frost before the spring. “I don't play well with others. I take their toys and break them if they don't give them to me when I ask nicely. What or who am I going to have to break to get you?”

 

This kid was a fuckin' sociopath, cold blooded through and through. And damn if that didn't just make Negan want him more. Nobody's fucked upness matched his own so well and it was gorgeous in its helter-skelter beauty.

 

Negan ran his tongue over his teeth as he sized the boy up. “How about you plead your case, make me feel amazing, blow my fucking mind and then maybe I'll make my decision?”

 

Carl crossed his arms again, hip cocked out to the side like the fuckin' princess that he was, contemplating Negan's offer. After a moment, Carl moved closer to him and settled on his knees between his legs, giving voice to Negan's fate for the evening. “Alright...but just so you have a fresh memory of who fucks you the right way.”

 

He took Negan's cock in hand, giving it a rough, almost painful stroke from base to tip earning him a low groan. Precum was already pearling at the tip and Carl licked his lips and leaned in to take a taste. Just before those tantalizing lips and tongue made contact with his aching dick, Carl's gaze flicked up to him. “No more freebies daddy.”

 

Fuckin' tease...

 

“Goddammit, Carl--” He cut himself off with a rumbling moan. He watched as Carl took him down the base, watched each inch disappear down his throat. Negan groaned and bucked his hips into that addicting wet heat. The boy looked up at him with a teary, watery eye when lips pressed into Negan's pelvic bone and it should be a sin. Negan is trapped, can't look away as Carl slowly pulls his mouth off without breaking that intense eye contact, only to take him down his throat again. Carl held him deep, using Negan's cock to fuck his mouth until drool was dripping down his chin onto his shirt.

 

 

The boy was right on at least one account—nobody sucked his dick as well as Carl did.

 

“Gonna make me come, baby boy.” Negan grunted, pushing into Carl's mouth. Carl hovered over him letting him thrust up into and use his hot mouth as selfishly as he wanted. Just as he was about to come, the teen sat back on his heels with a grin, wiping his mouth on the back of his hand.

 

“Come here, angel.” Carl's eye went bedroom soft at Negan's command, the day blue iris deepening to midnight navy as he slid back into Negan's lap. He settled into the spot that they had both decided months ago was just for him. Negan slid hands under the teen's shirt, up and around his back, cupping his shoulder blades and pulling him closer. Carl's head fell back with a cooing moan as Negan rucked his shirt up and kissed his hardened nipples. Fingers tangled in the older man's hair keeping his mouth right where Carl wanted it.

 

Negan palmed the boy through his jeans, giving his member a firm squeeze that made another honey rich sound tumble off his lips. Carl's cheeks were starting to flush and Negan was being allowed a glimpse of the softness at Carl's center. That fragile, trembling warmth at the heart of him that Negan yearned to possess. The rough sex was great, but that vulnerability that only he got to see was what he craved, what got him out of bed in the morning, hoping Carl would grace him with his presence again.

 

But he could never tell Carl that. No, the boy already thought highly enough of himself and of his value in Negan's eyes.

 

Wordlessly, Carl stood and stripped, not making a show of it, just pulled his clothes from his slender frame and went over to the bedside table. He grinned as he retrieved the lube and made his way back over to his older lover, kneeling over him. He licked his lips as he slicked up two of his own fingers and slid them inside himself with a sensual sigh. His eye fell shut and his back arched slightly, collar bones hollowing and ribs a concave relief against the snowdrop petal fair skin of his chest.

 

Negan couldn't tear his eyes away if he tried. He took his length in hand, stroking himself in time with Carl's movements. God, his boy was beautiful. With all of his earlier talk, Negan couldn't help his own green eyed monster making itself known, putting the words in his mouth and forcing them out before he had really thought the consequence of them through.

 

“Who else gets to see you like this, baby? You got a little boyfriend back home?” He lived for the fiery look in his boy's eye when he jerked back to him.

 

“Does it matter?” Carl's lips curled in a kitten of a smirk, fingers still moving and working himself open, slowing only minutely.

 

“Fuck yes it does.” Negan growled. If this boy was going to demand his exclusivity, then it damn well was going to be mutual.

 

Carl removed his fingers and sat back down on his throne that was the king's lap, taking Negan inside him. He let gravity pull him down, sinking fully on Negan's cock with a breathy sigh. “I'm keeping my options open.”

 

“Excuse me?” Just the thought of someone else touching or even catching a glimpse of Carl like this made a thick, black anger gum up his chest.

 

“Yeah,” Carl rolled his hips, working the cock buried deep inside him. “There's these three older men...real daddy types...and they're all interested in getting a taste of this 'twink ass.'” He laughed under his breath as he took his own length in hand, stroking in time with his slow grind.

 

Negan hooked his arms under Carl's legs and lifted him as he stood and dropped him on the bed none too gently. White hot rage was boiling just under the surface of his skin. He wrapped a hand around Carl's throat, pinning him to the bed with the weight of his hips. “You have the big fuckin' man sized balls to come in here and tell me to off my own damn wives while you're sluttin' it up like the Whore of Babylon back in Alexandria? Fuck no, Carl. That shit does not fly.” He was leaning so close to the boy's face their noses were nearly touching. “I want their names.”

 

“What? Why?” Carl arched one eyebrow, seemingly completely unfazed by the hand wrapping tighter about his long neck.

 

“So I know who to put on the guest list for your fuckin' quinceanera. Why do you think?!” He was growling at this point. The more Carl showed his easy placidity, the angrier Negan became. “So I know who I'm going to be introducing Lucille to while I'm bashing in their goddamn brains! You know, that's not good enough, maybe I'll gut them like I did Spencer. That seemed to get your little panties all wet for me.”

 

Carl's eye was wide, full of unbridled lust, watching Negan's mouth and eyes as he spoke. “You'd do that? Kill for me? Again?”

 

“You know damn well I would.” His chest was heaving, his anger somehow dissipating under Carl's heated gaze.

 

Playboy centerfold lips wrapped sensuously around Carl's next words. “Only you, daddy. No one else has ever touched me.” He brought a hand up and cupped Negan's cheek, fingertips just beginning to push into salt and pepper hair.

 

“What the hell?” Negan almost felt boneless with the relief that flooded through him and removed the hand around Carl's throat. Sure, he would kill anyone and anything for Carl, all he had to do was point his little finger and Negan would be his black knight. But he didn't want to stir anymore shit with Rick right now and offing three of his people because 'they were boning your son when my dick is the only dick he should be sitting on' sounds like the perfect way to get himself killed.

 

“I just wanted to see how you would react.” Carl shrugged, smiling up at him.

 

“Did I give you the reaction you were hoping for you little asshole?” Negan couldn't help grinning now too, Carl's joy, however fucked up it may be, was infectious.

 

“Mmm.” Carl reached up and wrapped his arms around Negan's neck, pulling him further down onto him to whisper in his ear. “Even better...all that fury, that violence in your veins...” He drew in a sharp breath that was dripping with a heady eroticism that had every nerve on Negan's body standing at attention, honed in on the boy beneath him. “...god, Daddy..it gets me so hot for you.”

 

“Fuck, baby boy...” Negan was already hard again by the time Carl had finished speaking. He was still slick and open and Negan lined up and pushed all the way in nice and slow. “That what you want, baby? Need daddy to yell at you a little to show you how much he cares?”

 

“Yes!” The teen's back arched magnificently off the bed as he was filled, eye shut tight.

 

Negan's hands slipped across and stroked and grasped all the milky flesh laid bare before him. He applied wet, biting kisses everywhere he could reach, the curve of a shoulder, the sloping line of a tendon at the side of his neck, the high peaked cup of a clavicle pressed into his face as Carl wrapped his arms tighter about his shoulders, body curving around him.

 

They stayed that way, rocking back and forth, give and take, for what felt like hours. Carl's narrow hips rose and fell as he met the older man's thrusts like he was born to do it while sweet little whimpers and moans left him. Negan was slick with sweat where their bodies touched, Carl always running hot even in the dead of winter. He licked the salt from Carl's skin, wanting to consume everything he gave him, reveling in the taste of him on his tongue.

 

As Negan's rhythm began to falter, rushing headlong into completion, Carl's eye slowly opened, long lashes blinking over hazy summer blue. He looked Negan right in the eye, made sure his older lover's attention was all on him, greedy little creature that he was. “No one can compare, I don't ever want anyone else...just you.”

 

His body reacted, thrumming with the hum of electricity, to Carl's confession, orgasm pushing insistent against him now. It wasn't fair how this kid could effect him so strongly with just a few choice spoken phrases. “Quit playing dirty.”

 

Carl's breathless laughter urged him on, snapping his hips so harshly, Negan cut that laugh short, turning it into a moan. He reached between them and grabbed the boy's length, pulling him closer to the edge. Carl tossed his head back, a broken moan being forced out of him as he climaxed, tightening down hard on Negan's cock.

 

“That's it, angel, come for daddy...” A few more thrusts into that quivering heat and Negan was coming hard. He ignored Carl's whimpers of over stimulation as he chased the last waves of his orgasm, knowing he liked it when Negan treated him with some disregard to his own pleasure. He wondered if Carl felt as owned as Negan felt he owned him in that moment.

 

 

///

 

They both stood under the warm spray of the shower in Negan's private bathroom, enjoying each other's bodies and the drum of the water on their skin. A comfortable silence had settled down into the cracks and space between them as Negan gently washed Carl's hair, fingernails scraping lightly across his scalp and the teen was leaning into him practically purring in contentment.

 

“Negan...” Carl started, voice deceptively soft, breaking the silence. “Have you decided?”

 

“Why are you pushing so hard for this, honeybunch?” Negan's hands slid from the teen's soapy hair down to his waist, directing him under the spray and rinsing the bubbles from his long hair.

 

“Because...” Carl turned and stood on tiptoe to wrap his arms around and cling to the older man. “Remember how you got so eager to introduce Lucille to my supposed lovers? Yeah, I want to introduce your wives to my Colt every time I think about you touching them.”

 

“Aww, baby...you're so cute when you get all possessive.” Negan grinned, pride and satisfaction thicker than molasses and Carl just rolled his eye. He schooled his features into something a little softer, more gentle as he took the teen's face into his hands, holding him like he was made of glass. “Tell me though, baby boy, do you think I actually love any of my wives? Do you know how many times I've said anything remotely resembling 'I love you?' Never. Not once. You and I both know who I love.”

 

Carl tried to pull his face free and look away, but Negan wouldn't let him, made sure Carl was looking at him as wholly as he was looking at Carl. “Who do I love, baby? Tell me.”

 

“...me.” Carl's entire being was docile and meek, cheeks a fetching shade of cherry red.

 

“That's right, angel, only you.” Negan kissed one of those pinked cheeks, letting his hands fall away.

 

The boy glanced away, biting at his bottom lip before turning his gaze back to Negan. His lips opened and closed a few times, like the words were stuck and his voice sounds shaky when he finally does speak. “No one will ever touch me like you have, Negan. Even if...even if you're not around,” So many implications were sewn neatly into that phrase. “I don't want anyone else to touch me like you do now. Just you, Negan, just you.”

 

Those words nearly made his heart stop, were the penultimate confession he had been aching for, craving since he had started all this with Carl. Since he had first admitted he loved the boy. And it felt like a love letter penned to Negan's tar black soul.

 

“Damn, kid.” Negan chuckled, head hung in utter defeat, he knew then that he would give Carl whatever he wanted, do whatever it took to keep him right by his side where he belonged. He'd been right when he said he owned him, because Carl did. Negan's heart had decided long ago to make an escape from the cage of his ribs and set up shelter in the nest of Carl's small, blood stained hands. “Love you too.”

 

“I didn't say that.” Carl smirked, pressing the soap slick, soft skin of his torso into Negan's, fitting them together like a lock and key.

 

“You pretty much did.” Large hands ran wet down the back of ribs to a nipped in waist. Negan grinned, loving how Carl always pushed for physical intimacy when he found Negan's emotional intimacy to be too intense. “Someday. Someday you'll say it.”

 

“Don't hold your breath.” Carl chuckled and rested his head at the crook of his older lover's neck. Negan had to resist the urge to sway back and forth like a couple of awkward middle schoolers at their first formal.

 

After a moment of standing there, soaking each other in, Negan spoke up again. “I'm not getting rid of my wives.” He put up a placating hand at the instant glare that earned him. “But, if you'd let me finish, feisty britches, I won't be seeing them anymore. Not intimately. I may have to occasionally, you know, physically look at them, but no more bumpin' uglies. Scouts honor.” That earned him another eye roll but a gentle smile followed quickly behind it. “I have to keep them here on principal. It sends a message and I still need their husbands and families kept in place.”

 

“I understand.” A sudden seriousness fell over Carl's face. “Its just business.”

 

“Damn skippy.” God, he loved how fuckin' cold-hearted his little ice queen was. They really were a match made in hell on earth.

 

“Thanks.” The gratitude was whispered against his chest, a surprisingly bashful gesture that wasn't entirely unexpected considering the boy's hatred of feeling too vulnerable. Carl's lips were muffled by his skin. “Means a lot to me.”

 

“I know it does, angel face.” Negan bent and placed an affectionate kiss to Carl's crown. “Does this mean you're gonna start calling me your boyfriend and doodling little hearts with our initials in them in your fuzzy pink diary?”

 

“Its purple and not fuzzy, I'll have you know.” Carl snarked, nose in the air, blatantly ignoring the other half of the question.

 

“You are aren't you? You're gonna priss around all love sick thinking about how your crush said they wanted to go out with you.” Negan continued to tease, goading Carl into an indignant pout. He tickled under the boy's chin, singsonging. “You like me~”

 

“Stooop.” Carl whined, covering his ears.