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The REAL Disaster of the Ultimate Academy

Chapter Text

Kokichi Oma added 15 people to the chat

 

Kokichi Oma changed the group name to The REAL Disaster of the Ultimate Academy

 

Kokichi Oma changed their name to omaGOD

 

omaGOD changed 15 names

 

omaGOD: welcome!! to your worst nightmare ;))

 

omaGOD: I am the god of this land, bow to me

 

omaGOD: I sincerely hope you enjoy the titles I have provided for you ;))

 

ultimatePENIS: I hate this

 

ultimatePENIS: when you say it out loud it sounds exactly the same

 

ultimatePENIS: I h a t e t h I s

 

S P A C E J A M: actually im not to mad about this

 

shylock homos: …its fitting tbh

 

minions are beautiful: I fail to comprehend why I was surprised

 

mothergoose: No comment.

 

peel the avocado: this is my name. til the day I die. avocado

 

peel the avocado: you’ll never let that joke die will you

 

Hermione GAYnger: I mean,,, I guess

 

catch these lesbian hands: its not wrong

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: ugh

 

peel the avocado: DSSKKHEGGEKSHSHS

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: I would kill you but I think maki would beat me to it

 

Hawumaki :3: fuck you

 

ultimatePENIS: oh my g o d

 

S P A C E J A M: oma why

 

ultimatePENIS: do you have a death wish

 

Hawumaki :3: die in a fire

 

omaGOD: if you don’t like it, just change it yknow

 

Hawumaki :3 changed their name to kill yourself

 

omaGOD: ouch

 

S P A C E J A M: thats harsh, maki roll

 

kill yourself changed their name to delete your account

 

S P A C E J A M: …better

 

shirogaNYA: its surprisingly more appropriate tbh

 

they-followin-me-ma: gonta not understand, why gonta’s name weird?

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: oh god

 

ultimatePENIS: I hope you guys realize that kirumi will literally murder us if we taint gonta in any way

 

mothergoose: that is correct

 

minions are beautiful: gonta stay away

 

shirogaNYA: ur to pure for this

 

I AM ATUWAT: I dont understand my name??

 

omaGOD: say it out loud

 

I AM ATUWAT: ok

 

I AM ATUWAT: WAIT

 

I AM ATUWAT: HOW D A R E

 

omaGOD: ;)))

 

shylock homos: oh geez

 

ultimatePENIS: PFFFFFFFTT

 

shirogaNYA: thats actually a great pun

 

minions are beautiful: do not encourage him

 

I AM ATUWAT: I don’t like my name :(

 

omaGOD: awwwwwee did I offend atua? Just change it

 

I am ATUWAT changed their name to god is dead and we killed him

 

ultimatePENIS: oh

 

ultimatePENIS: did not expect that

 

god is dead and we killed him: is ur fault oma >:T

 

omaGOD: peasant I a m god

 

S P A C E J A M: well angies nickname is about to be correct

 

S P A C E J A M: makis on her way to kill you rn

 

omaGOD: fuck

 

shirogaNYA: rip

 

shylock homos: rip

 

ultimatePENIS: rip

 

god is dead and we killed him: rip

 

catch these lesbian hands: rip

 

Hermione GAYnger: rip

 

peel the avocado: rip

 

they-followin-me-ma: rip!! :D

 

omaGOD: GONTA WHY

 

minions are beautiful: oh so t h a t s what those noises are

 

minions are beautiful: shes sprinting down the hall, I presume

 

S P A C E J A M: say ur prayers

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: god I wish that were me

 

S P A C E J A M: you want maki to chase after you??

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: no I want her to fucking kill me

 

ultimatePENIS: …oh

 

shylock homos: …thats rough buddy

 

shirogaNYA: IS THAT AN AVATAR THE LAST AIRBENDER REFERENCE I LOVE THAT ANIME

 

minions are beautiful: did

 

minions are beautiful: did you just call ATLA an a n i m e

 

shirogaNYA: um

 

peel the avocado: oh my god

 

catch these lesbian hands: that’s gotta be illegal in some countries

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: actually maki you have my full permission to kill tsumugi as well

 

S P A C E J A M: DAMN

 

they-followin-me-ma: no! do not hurt tsumugi D:

 

they-followin-me-ma: kokichi is okay though :D

 

shirogaNYA: GONTA OMG

 

minions are beautiful: WHAT AN UNEXPECTED TURN OF EVENTS

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: JESUS FUCKING CHRIST

 

god is dead and we killed him: O W O W H A T S T H I S

 

Hermione GAYnger: PFFFTT WELL SAID MY BOY

 

delete your account: I see kirumi has taught him well

 

catch these lesbian hands: FINALLY A DEGENERATE SAID SOMETHING SMART

 

S P A C E J A M: DNSBHDUKDYUIETYDSSF SAVAGE

 

ultimatePENIS: I think I just heard shuichi scream really loudly holy shit

 

ultimatePENIS: you okay buddy

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: thats what that was???

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: I thought it was the sound of maki finally fucking murdering kokichi thanks for getting my hopes up

 

omaGOD: guys stop ur scaring the baby

 

shylock homos: what baby?

 

omaGOD: me

 

Hermione GAYnger: im deactivating

 

mothergoose: apologies for interrupting your… conversation

 

mothergoose: however

 

mothergoose: I hope you all know class starts in 5 min

 

ultimatePENIS: W H A T

 

Hermione GAYnger: shit

 

catch these lesbian hands: H I M I K O

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: we are dead

 

god is dead and we killed him: like oma :D

 

S P A C E J A M: hes safe for now

 

S P A C E J A M: lucky for you, oma, im pretty sure killing in class is illegal

 

delete your account: jokes on you, my hatred of oma surpasses the law

 

ultimatePENIS: GUYS WE’RE GONNA BE LATE

 

shylock homos: jokes on you guys im already here and class has started

 

shylock homos: gonta and kirumi are already here too

 

shirogaNYA: h o w did you get there so fast

 

omaGOD: wait if class has started for you why are you texting? >:3

 

shylock homos: uh

 

S P A C E J A M: b u s t e d

 

delete your account: kaito you aren’t even dressed yet so shut the fuck up

 

omaGOD: D A M N

 

ultimatePENIS: MAKI KILLS AGAIN

 

peel the avocado: A BODY HAS BEEN DISCOVERED

 

shylock homos: this was a mistake

 

delete your account: just like oma

 

peel the avocado: AND THERE GOES ANOTHER KILL

 

omaGOD: I regret everything

Chapter Text

---Friday, November 24th, 7:21pm---

 

omaGOD: brace for impact

 

shylock homos: huh

 

ultimatePENIS: what

 

catch these lesbian hands: oma what did you DO

 

omaGOD: its coming

 

shirogaNYA: that’s ominous

 

minions are beautiful: what are you blabbering about this time?

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: if a murderous clown doesn’t come bursting through this door rn and fucking killing me im suing all of you and THEN killing myself

 

Hermione GAYnger: dude fr are you okay

 

Say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: no

 

omaGOD: fuck its already here

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: HEY DICK TWATS

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: oh geez

 

shylock homos: WAIT IS THAT M I U

 

delete your account: who else would have a username like that

 

shylock homos: …fair point

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: I expect nothing and I am still let down

 

minions are beautiful: run

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: TOOK YA LONG ENOUGH TO INVITE ME HERE YOU DICKLESS FUCK

 

S P A C E J A M: I have a feeling shes talking about oma

 

catch these lesbian hands: y o u  d o n t  s a y

 

omaGOD: dickless?

 

omaGOD: i am sure someone here can confirm that that is not the case

 

omaGOD: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

shirogaNYA: they can W H A T

 

peel the avocado: WAIT WHO CAN CONFIRM THAT

 

ultimatePENIS: um

 

ultimatePENIS: anyway miu why weren’t you here this morning? Or all day for that matter

 

omaGOD: she was masturbating. all day

 

shirogaNYA: SHE WAS W H A T

 

minions are beautiful: why are you surprised?

 

ultimatePENIS: how do you know that?

 

omaGOD: I dont. But we’re talking about miu so its safe to guess >:3

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: for once thats not the case

 

peel the avocado: WHAT DO YOU MEAN FOR ONCE

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: I had detention :P

 

minions are beautiful: …all day?

 

shirogaNYA: not surprised

 

Hermione GAYnger: why tho

 

catch these lesbian hands: MIU DONT ANSWER THAT

 

catch these lesbian hands: SPARE HER INNOCENCE

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: chill the fuck out

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: I "apparently" destroyed something very important, nbd

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: usami yelled at me

 

omaGOD: wow that must have been utterly terrifying

 

omaGOD: having a fucking rabbit chew you out

 

omaGOD: “miuw, i am vewy mad at youw. Im sowwy but I must puwish youw”

 

Hermione GAYnger: FDFSDTDJHTREAYKJRDTYWUET

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: howe abowe youw stowp befowe I kick youw dick in :33

 

Hermione GAYnger: S T O P

 

peel the avocado: oh god

 

minions are beautiful: BURN IT

 

catch these lesbian hands: holy fuck hes speaking like tsumugi someone save us

 

omaGOD: howe dawe youw 3:<

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: shut the fuck up hetero

 

omaGOD: what the f u c k did you just call me

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: ANYWAYS YALL BITCHES BETTER FILL ME IN ON THIS DAMN THING

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: WHAT WERE YALL UP TO WHILE I WAS GONE

 

peel the avocado: um

 

delete your account: im not explaining anything to anyone who uses "y’all"

 

shylock homos: …thats fair

 

catch these lesbian hands: understandable have a nice day

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: count me out

 

minions are beautiful: allow me ,ahem,

 

delete your account: did you just fucking type “ahem”

 

minions are beautiful: shut

 

minions are beautiful: as I was saying

 

minions are beautiful: maki chased after oma, ryoma wants to die, tsumugi called ATLA and anime, all of us were late to class, shuichi was busted for texting in class and maki killed both oma and kaito

 

minions are beautiful: so basically, same shit as always

 

omaGOD: ouch

 

shirogaNYA: hes not wrong

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: yknow maki the fact that oma is still alive rn means you suck ass at ur job

 

delete your account: oh please I think we all know who sucks the most ass here

 

shirogaNYA: miu

 

minions are beautiful: miu

 

shylock homos: miu

 

omaGOD: miu

 

ultimatePENIS: miu

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: miu

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: am I supposed to be offended by that??

 

shylock homos: wait you “destroyed something important”? what was it

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: um

 

god is dead and we killed him: hello! Sorry for being late, I was searching for keebo, has anyone seen him? :D

 

god is dead and we killed him: wait

 

god is dead and we killed him: W A I T

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: IT WAS AN ACCIDENT

 

peel the avocado: MIU YOU DIDN’T



say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: HOLY FUCK

 

shirogaNYA: OH JEESUS

 

minions are beautiful: OH DEAR OH DEAR OH DEAR OH DEAR OH DEAR

 

catch these lesbian hands: WAIT A MINUTE DID Y

 

Hermione GAYnger: HOLY S H I T

 

catch these lesbian hands: H I M I K O

 

they-followin-me-ma: what happen to keebo? D:

 

ultimatePENIS: WHAT DID YOU DO TO HIM

 

omaGOD: SHE PROLLY STUCK HER DICK IN HIM TO HARD

 

minions are beautiful: wh

 

omaGOD: well keebo don’t got a dick so

 

delete your account: ill decide if I kill you or not on my way to your room

 

S P A C E J A M: maki dont

 

delete your account: fine

 

shirogaNYA: ^couple goals :DD

 

delete your account: tsumugi do you want to die

 

shirogaNYA: eep

 

ultimatePENIS: guys I can hear gonta sobbing next door

 

shirogaNYA: OH NO

 

they-followin-me-ma: WHY DID MIU KILL KEEBO??? D’:

 

shirogaNYA: brace yourselves

 

mothergoose: I demand an explanation as to why I can hear gonta crying.

 

catch these lesbian hands: fuck we’re dead

 

Hermione GAYnger: nice knowing you guys

 

minions are beautiful: rather, it was not nice knowing you guys

 

god is dead and we killed him: kirumi would not kill us, do not worry :D

 

peel the avocado: you seem to severely underestimate her mom powers

 

shylock homos: we seem to be getting off topic

 

shylock homos: we seem to be forgetting that Keebo IS DEAD

 

omaGOD: he can finally rust in peace :’)

 

S P A C E J A M: actually maki im allowing you to go to omas room and knee him in the dick

 

delete your account: fucking finally

 

shylock homos: again,,, KEEBO IS DEAD

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: HES NOT DEAD CHILL THE FUCK OUT

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: SOUDA IS FIXING HIM RN

 

shirogaNYA: what did you even do to him?

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: I ran into him in the hallway

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: n he got so scared he flew against the wall

 

minions are beautiful: that was quite an underwhelming answer

 

S P A C E J A M: thats it? :I

 

shirogaNYA: wait how did you bump into him so hard he flew against the wall??

 

omaGOD: pics or it didn’t happen

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: idk ask mahiru

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: anyways it was fucking hilarious

 

shylock homos: you left keebo alone? With souda?

 

shylock homos: thats a terrible idea wtf

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: chill. I told him if he tries anything dumb with keebo ill eviscerate him, cut his fucking dick off n stick it in the wound

 

peel the avocado: W H A T

 

catch these lesbian hands: GCDFYDYRSUYRESWEUSSTFDF

 

delete your account: NOW THAT’S SOMETHING ID LIKE TO SEE

 

mothergoose: sometimes I question your sanity.

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: SCREW THAT IM CONSTANTLY QUESTIONING IT MIU WHAT THE F U C K

 

minions are beautiful: that’s… creative

 

omaGOD: “sometimes… i want (miu) to fucking eviscerate me and then make sweet sweet love to my open festering wounds as i lay bleeding out screaming in agony waiting for death’s merciful embrace :333”

 

peel the avocado: WH

 

they-followin-me-ma: NO!!! DO NOT CUT HIS DICK OFF!!!

 

XxxTIDDIESxxx: o ng

 

delete your account: NO!!! DO NOT CUT HIS DICK OFF!!!

 

S P A C E J A M: NO!!! DO NOT CUT HIS DICK OFF!!!

 

shylock homos: NO!!! DO NOT CUT HIS DICK OFF!!!

 

god is dead and we killed him: NO!!! DO NOT CUT HIS DICK OFF!!!

 

catch these lesbian hands: NO!!! DO NOT CUT HIS DICK OFF!!!

 

Hermione GAYnger: NO!!! DO NOT CUT HIS DICK OFF!!!

 

minions are beautiful: NO!!! DO NOT CUT HIS DICK OFF!!!

 

omaGOD: NO!!! DO NOT CUT HIS DICK OFF!!!

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: NO!!! DO NOT CUT HIS DICK OFF!!!

 

ultimatePENIS: NO!!! DO NOT CUT HIS DICK OFF!!!

 

shirogaNYA: NO!!! DO NOT CUT HIS DICK OFF!!!

 

peel the avocado: NO!!! DO NOT CUT HIS DICK OFF!!!

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: C H I L L  O U T

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: itl be fine

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: it better fucking be

 

www.do-robots-have-dicks.com: hello everyone. Apologies for my absence, I was having some… difficulties. Please fill me in on what I missed.

 

omaGOD: NO!!! DO NOT CUT HIS DICK OFF!!!

 

www.do-robots-have-dicks.com: what?

 

shirogaNYA: omg his u s e r n a m e

 

they-followin-me-ma: keebo is not dead! :D

 

www.do-robots-have-dicks.com: of course not. What is going on? What is wrong with my name?

 

omaGOD: you like it? ;D

 

www.do-robots-have-dicks.com: I do not know how to respond to it.

 

omaGOD: anyways thats not important

 

omaGOD: what is important though is this:

 

omaGOD: how the heck did you fly into the wall after simply bumping into miu??

 

www.do-robots-have-dicks.com: oh

 

www.do-robots-have-dicks.com: you see…

 

www.do-robots-have-dicks.com: I got startled and flustered so I jumped, then hit the wall.

 

shirogaNYA: flustered?

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: HE GOT A FACE FULL OF MY HONKERS

 

shirogaNYA: u know what forget I asked

 

omaGOD: wow keebs. miu must have given you her

 

delete your account: don’t you dare

 

omaGOD: graTITude

 

delete your account: and im out

 

delete your account: fuck you guys im going to bed

 

S P A C E J A M: same here

 

shirogaNYA: bad post op

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: im too old for this shit

 

omaGOD: WAIT WHY IS EVERYONE LEAVING ME ALONE

 

omaGOD: I cant BOOBlieve you guys!!

 

ultimatePENIS: I think one of my brain cells just popped

 

omaGOD: what? are my puns causing a NIPPLE effect?

 

god is dead and we killed him: im going to sleep

 

god is dead and we killed him: and I pray to atua that one of us has the human decency to murder you in your sleep

 

Hermione GAYnger: dw ill cast a “shut the fuck up and die” spell

 

catch these lesbian hands: usually id scold you for swearing but for once I applaud you

 

minions are beautiful: god please let me fall into such a deep slumber my body dies and my soul escapes to the astral plane where I never have to see oma ever again

 

shylock homos: ...goodnight everyone

 

omaGOD: aww goodnight shuichi! :DD

 

shylock homos: everyone but you

 

omaGOD: aww man

 

omaGOD: well

 

omaGOD: might as well get some bREAST ;)))

 

Chapter Text

---Saturday, November 25th, 3:00am---

 

 

shylock homos: babe

 

shylock homos: the love of my life

 

shylock homos: did you take my hoodie??

 

omaGOD: …nooo

 

shylock homos: was that a lie?

 

omaGOD: …yeeesss

 

shylock homos: I knew it

 

omaGOD: IM SORRY

 

omaGOD: I PROMISE I ONLY WEAR IT WHEN IM ALONE

 

shylock homos: fine but please bring it back soon okay?

 

omaGOD: you got it shu~

 

shylock homos: night

 

omaGOD: night~

 

omaGOD: wait

 

shylock homos: WAIT

omaGOD: W A I T

 

S P A C E J A M: DRSAERTSYJETHMFTDYFHRSGETAQERYJTU

 

S P A C E J A M: DFSRSEYWRSRSDJXFDYREQRYKUTTITYTDFXRWASYRTTH

 

S P A C E J A M: HOLY FCUCKGG

Hermione GAYnger: YES!!! YES!!! YES!!! YES!!! YES!!!

 

catch these lesbian hands: FINALLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Hermione GAYnger: YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

ultimatePENIS: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH

 

shylock homos: WAIT GUYS S T OP ITS NOT WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: FUCK BITCH SHIT CUNT MOTHERFUCKING FINALLY!!!!!!!!!

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: VGMFCFSTERQWGYUYIHJVBCXSREWRTYUIJNMBVCXDSE

 

minions are beautiful: G O D H A S S P O K E N!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

god is dead and we killed him: GOD Is A L I V E AND W E R E V I V ED HIM!!!!!

 

omaGOD: STOP SCREAMING UR GONNA WAKE EVERYONE UP

Hermione GAYnger: SURPRISE BITCH WERE ALL AWAKE

 

shirogaNYA: SHIP HAS SAILED!!!! SHIP HAS SAILED!!! SHIP!!! HAS!!! SAILED!!!

 

shirogaNYA: SHIP!!!!!!!! IS!!!!!!! C A N O N!!!!!!!!

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

 

mothergoose: MY SONS! I AM SO VERY PROUD OF YOU!

 

shylock homos: KIRUMI YOU TOO???

 

they-followin-me-ma: Yay! Gonta is proud of friends and hope you have very good relationship :D

 

omaGOD: OK NGL GONTA BUT YOU JUST MADE ME CRY

 

peel the avocado: I FUCKING KNEW IT

peel the avocado: THERE WAS WAYYY TO MUCH SEXUAL TENSION BETWEEN YOU TWO TO BE HET

 

shylock homos: K AEDE DTOP SCREAMUG

 

shylock homos: ITS 3 IN THE FUCKING MORNING

 

ultimatePENIS: WHY DID U NOT TELL US???????

omaGOD: WE WERE GONNA TELL U EVENTUALLY

 

shylock homos: BUT WE WERE SCARED

 

peel the avocado: wait. you were scared?

 

peel the avocado: scared we would reject you guys?

 

www.do-robots-have-dicks.com: we would never reject you for that!

 

ultimatePENIS: im so happy for you both!!

 

omaGOD: really??

 

Hermione GAYnger: yes!!

 

mothergoose: it takes much courage to reveal a relationship such as yours to friends. you and shuichi are such opposites, it is only natural we would be shocked.

 

mothergoose: yet that is why it works. I can see you are both very close. we would never reject such friends due to a relationship. we applaud you both and wish you a happy relationship.

 

they-followin-me-ma: gonta agree with kirumi! gonta is proud of shuichi and oma :D

 

catch these lesbian hands: you may be degenerate males but im still proud!

 

Hermione GAYnger: yep

 

minions are beautiful: what she said

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: exactly

 

peel the avocado: :DD

 

ultimatePENIS: well done!!

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: ya got that right!

 

god is dead and we killed him: what mom said!

 

S P A C E J A M: nice job shuichi!

 

shylock homos: wow

 

omaGOD: andddd im crying

 

omaGOD: thank you guys

 

mothergoose: anyways, it is 3 am. I advise we all get to bed.

 

shirogaNYA: you got it

 

delete your account: alright

 

they-followin-me-ma: goodnight everybody!

 

shylock homos: good night

 

shylock homos: night babe :)

 

omaGOD: night :D

 

 

---Saturday, November 25th, 8:14am---

 

 

omaGOD: gooooood morning everyone!

 

omaGOD: annddd good morning shu :)

 

shylock homos: good morning oma

 

shirogaNYA: wow last night was wild

 

ultimatePENIS: that was a thing

 

minions are beautiful: indeed

 

omaGOD: ANYWAYS

 

omaGOD: I HAVE SOMETHING PLANNED TODAY

 

omaGOD: WE’RE GONNA PLAY A GAME

 

god is dead and we killed him: hoooo boi

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: dear god

 

delete your account: sigh

 

delete your account: well ive got nothing better to do so

 

S P A C E J A M: yeet I guess

 

omaGOD: so everyone is playing??

 

Hermione GAYnger: I don’t think kirumi is, shes doing volunteer work around the school

 

omaGOD: figures

 

S P A C E J A M: soo whats the game??

 

omaGOD: IM GLAD YOU ASKED

 

omaGOD: im gonna write a sentence or a google search that one of you guys have said or searched before

 

omaGOD: and you’ve gotta guess who said or searched it!!! :D

 

catch these lesbian hands: oh jeez

 

Hermione GAYnger: regrets

 

delete your account: mistakes were made

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: YKNOW THIS MIGHT ACTUALLY BE FUN

 

www.do-robots-have-dicks.com: you think?

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: wait a minute

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: i get that you would remember the dumb shit weve said before but

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: how do you know our google searches??

 

omaGOD: cause you guys suck at passwords lmao

 

delete your account: wait

 

god is dead and we killed him: DID YOU SNOOP AROUND OUR SCHOOL PADS??

 

S P A C E J A M: YOU B I T C H

 

peel the avocado: ABORT MISSION ABORT ABORT ABORT

 

catch these lesbian hands: THIS WAS A MISTAKE

 

omaGOD: CHILL OUT JESUS CHRIST

 

omaGOD: I ONLY LOOKED AT UR GOOGLE SEARCHES

 

delete your account: EXACTLY

 

S P A C E J A M: IVE GOT NOTHING TO HIDE

 

omaGOD: weeelll if you’ve got nothing to hide, why are you freaking out? ;D

 

shylock homos: busted

 

S P A C E J A M: SHUICHI HOW DARE YOU BETRAY ME

 

ultimatePENIS: lets just get on with it

 

 

omaGOD: thank you kaede!! ahem

 

omaGOD: LETS BEGIN

 

omaGOD: first one is a quote:

 

omaGOD: “I wanna be like buzz lightyear. yknow, the first guy on the moon.”

 

peel the avocado: GFDRTSHGFGVGCXSRTUYUKNBVCXDSAW?UIOKNBVCX

 

peel the avocado: FORGET WHAT I SAID EARLIER THIS IS PERFECT

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: IM PSIISSINGG

 

Hermione GAYnger: I DUNNO MUCH ABOUT SPACE BUT IM PRETTY SURE THATS 100% WRONG

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: WHICH FUCKING DUMBASS SAID THAT

 

S P A C E J A M: WHO THE HELL

 

ultimatePENIS: OOFF

 

delete your account: wow. you guys are dumb

 

Hermione GAYnger: ??

 

delete your account: its obviously kaito

 

shirogaNYA: W H A T

 

minions are beautiful: how are you surprised?

 

catch these lesbian hands: I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN

 

S P A C E J A M: MAKI ROLL HOW COULD YOU

 

shylock homos: WAIT WAS IT ACTUALLY YOU

 

ultimatePENIS: DDSDFGHJBVCERYUIKNBVCSERTYUI

 

ultimatePENIS: I AM S C R EE C H I NG

 

minions are beautiful: wait maki, how were you so sure?

 

delete your account: cause I was there

 

delete your account: he said this to me

 

peel the avocado: o ng

 

omaGOD: that’s correct

 

omaGOD: she laughed for like 30 minutes straight

 

delete your account: it was fucking hilarious

 

S P A C E J A M: I meant to say Buzz Aldrin!! First person to walk on the moon!!

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: uh

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: buddy

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: he was the second person to walk on the moon

 

S P A C E J A M: fuck

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: the first to walk on the moon was Neil Armstrong

 

shylock homos: YOU’RE THE ULTIMATE ASTRONAUT HOW DO YOU NOT KNOW THIS

 

omaGOD changed S P A C E J A M’s name to buzz lightyear, first man on the moon

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: why do you do this to me

 

omaGOD: >:3

 

Hermione GAYnger: good choice

 

peel the avocado: 10/10 ign

 

delete your account: this is what you get

 

minions are beautiful: Neil A. spelled backwards is A. Lien

 

Hermione GAYnger: h o l y  s h I t

 

ultimatePENIS: YOOOOOOOO

 

omaGOD: …moving on

 

omaGOD: next is a google search!

 

omaGOD: “minion porn”

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: wh

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: W H A T THE F U C K

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: NOW THAT’S MORE LIKE IT

 

ultimatePENIS: MORE LIKE W  H AT

 

catch these lesbian hands: WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU GUYS

 

minions are beautiful: I can assure you, it is not me.

 

catch these lesbian hands: you sure?

 

minions are beautiful: minions are a disgrace to humanity itself. what language do they speak? what are their customs? life span? we do not know. nobody cares. to be a minion is to laugh in the face of the world itself. we know next to nothing about them, yet we know to much. we know that they are round, yellow, gibberish speaking, occasional cyclops short haired fat little twats. we want nothing to do with them. we want to learn nothing about them, we know too much already, and yet there is always. another. movie. theres even a movie just for them, loaded with minion lore. why? why do they think we want this? every time a new god damn movie comes out a piece of my soul breaks off and flies up to the heavens. where is it going? what more do we not know about minions? I do not want to know. what I want is my soul back. my life back. my humanity back. our world back. yet that is not possible, as everyday we are reminded of the futile existence of those fucking fat talking tic tacs. they love bananas? fuck that. fuck you and your bananas, minions. I hope satan himself rises from the fiery pits of hell and drags these shit bags down to the seering asshole of hades where they may suffer eternally in the underworld, away from us. away from the world. fuck you, minions. I want my humanity back.

 

catch these lesbian hands: o m g

 

shirogaNYA: IM FCUKCKING PISSINGEEFC

 

Hermione GAYnger: THIS OPENED MY THIRD EYE

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: KIYO UR MY HEROO

 

shylock homos: that was the best thing ive ever read

 

they-followin-me-ma: gonta no like bananas :(

 

omaGOD: THERE ARE LEGIT TEARS IN MY EYES

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: THTSIH MADES ME NNNOT KLKILL MSELFF

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: FUCKING RELATABLE

 

delete your account: me when im disassociating

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: me as F U CK

 

minions are beautiful: minion porn? MINION??? PORN??? fuck that. FUCK THAT. fuck whichever one of you had the audacity to type those words. to put in the effort of tapping each key until the ungodly string of words formed. FUCK. YOU. not only that, but fuck you for making ME type this shit. do you think I want to spend my time writing essays about the disgrace that are minions? no. I want to spend my time being human. being free. but No. here I am, putting genuine effort into writing my true feelings into this god forbidden chat. not to mention, I actually had to LOOK UP information about minions just to write this god damn bullshit. my eyes had to fall victim to way too much minion info, way too many pictures of those FUCKING. PISS COLOURED. TWATS. I can erase my history all I want, but nothing will ever erase the mark it has seared in my dignity. in my soul. IN MY HUMANITY. and one of you, ONE OF YOU SHITHEADS had the NERVE to look up MINION. PORN. for your OWN PLEASURE. ONE OF YOU SHITHEADS can look at a picture of a NAKED. MINION. and be ATTRACTED TO IT. FUCK. YOU. IF THE IMAGE OF NAKED AND EXPOSED MINION BREAKS INTO MY HEAD ONE. MORE. TIME. I AM GOING OVER TO YOUR DORM, BREAKING IN, AND THEN BREAKING YOU. SAY GOODBYE TO YOUR HUMANITY, NOT THAT YOU HAD ANY BEFORE, YOU DISGUSTING CUNT.

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: TTHIS IW THE bETSSTR DYAYY OF MMY LLIIFRSS

 

peel the avocado: IM AHAVEING A FUCKIRNBE STROCKE

 

Hermione GAYnger: I CNAT BEREATHS

 

omaGOD: ALL I CAN IMAGINE WRIGHT NOW IS A DISSTRESSED KIYO FURIOUSLY TYPING THIS WHILE SWEAT DRIPS DOWN HIS FOREHEAD ALL WHILE HES FUCKING CRYING

 

Hermione GAYnger: HIS ROOM IS NEXT TO MINE I THINK HE IS CRYINGGG

 

omaGOD: HOLY FUCK

 

minions are beautiful changed their name to I fucking hate minions

 

catch these lesbian hands: OH MY GOODDDDD

 

mothergoose: I decide to take a miniscule break and check the chat and I see kiyo writing an essay about minions.

 

peel the avocado: you proud of him ma? ;D

 

mothergoose: very.

 

peel the avocado: NBVCFDSRJBVCFXDSSERTYUJNBVCXDSE

 

shylock homos: KIYO BUDDY ARE YOU OKAY

 

i fucking hate minions: yeah im fine how you doing

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: me when im having an internal meltdown and someone asks if im okay

 

i fucking hate minions: anyways, I would like to ask again.

 

i fucking hate minions: who. looked up. minion. porn.

 

catch these lesbian hands: wasnt me

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: despite the fact that id like to die im gonna be honest and say it wasn’t me

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: shockingly, it wasn’t me

 

shylock homos: nope

 

Hermione GAYnger: never

 

peel the avocado: nah man

 

ultimatePENIS: id would never

 

delete your account: do you really think I would do it?

 

shirogaNYA: ew no

 

i fucking hate minions: SOMEONE BETTER COME FORWARD

 

catch these lesbian hands: I don’t think whoever did it would actually come forward

 

www.do-robots-have-dicks.com: I hate to throw her under the bus like this

 

www.do-robots-have-dicks.com: but angie has been awfully quite this whole time, hasn’t she?

 

catch these lesbian hands: wh

 

shirogaNYA: omg

 

omaGOD: DING DING DING KEEBO GETS IT RIGHT

 

i fucking hate minions: W H A T

 

shylock homos: IT WAS HER?????

 

catch these lesbian hands: HOLY SHIT

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: DAMN ANG DIDN’T THINK YOU WERE INTO THAT

 

god is dead and we killed him: IM SORRY

 

ultimatePENIS: VCFXDSRJBVCDSERTYUJNBVCXS

 

Hermione GAYnger: I just heard kiyo exit his room

 

Hermione GAYnger: ur fucked angie

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: rip

 

god is dead and we killed him: I always knew kiyo would kill me someday

 

god is dead and we killed him: but I always thought tenko would go down with me

 

catch these lesbian hands: SORRY GAL

 

delete your account: before you die, angie, id like to ask you something

 

god is dead and we killed him: ya what

 

delete your account: WHY WERE YOU LOOKING UP MINION PORN

 

peel the avocado: ID LIKE TO KNOW THAT AS WELL

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: ME TOO

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: HIT ME UP WITH THE BEST PICS YOU FOUND BEFORE YOU DIe MK

 

god is dead and we killed him: EVERYONE CALM DOWN

 

god is dead and we killed him: you too kiyo

 

i fucking hate minions: …very well

 

god is dead and we killed him: alrighty then

 

god is dead and we killed him: its hifumi’s fault

 

shirogaNYA: what???

 

god is dead and we killed him: he commissioned me

 

god is dead and we killed him: he wanted a sculpture of a naked minion with boobs

 

shirogaNYA: WHAT???????

 

catch these lesbian hands: BVXDFGHHGFDSERTYUJBVCDSYUJVCDSEWY

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: i. what

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: I HATE TO SAY THIS BUT HE HAS GOOD TASTE

 

Hermione GAYnger: he probably wanted it as a gag

 

ultimatePENIS: did you take the commission

 

god is dead and we killed him: well

 

god is dead and we killed him: he paid me 150 bucks sooo

 

catch these lesbian hands: hhho ly shit

 

shylock homos: that’s… really sad

 

god is dead and we killed him: I, of course, had never drawn nor seen minion porn before

 

god is dead and we killed him: so I needed a reference

 

delete your account: did you not question his offer at all???

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: well it IS hifumi so

 

delete your account: fair point

 

god is dead and we killed him: I agreed to do the commission

 

god is dead and we killed him: and I told him this:

 

god is dead and we killed him: “ill do the commission, but I just want to let you know that you will never get into heaven. ever.”

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: SAVAGE

 

Hermione GAYnger: BURNT TO A CRISP

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: what was his response??

 

god is dead and we killed him: he just nodded

 

shylock homos: he must have already accepted his fate

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: whats the status on the commission?

 

delete your account: why do you wanna know?

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: well excuse me for being curious

 

god is dead and we killed him: the sculpture is still in progress, I was about to get to the dick and boobs

 

peel the avocado: both boobs and a dick??

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: THAT’S MAKES ME SO W E T

 

shylock homos: MIU I CAN HEAR U PLEASE STOP MOANING

 

shylock homos: FUCK SHE JUST GOT LOUDER

 

mothergoose: ah, so that is what you were working on.

 

mothergoose: I stopped by your lab the other day to clean up a bit

 

mothergoose: but in the middle of the room, with light shining on it was a rather exposed minion sculpture on a pedestal.

 

mothergoose: it disturbed me so much I immediately left the room.

 

peel the avocado: LMAO

 

delete your account: relatable

 

i fucking hate minions: so hifumi is the one who likes minion porn?

 

god is dead and we killed him: yea

 

i fucking hate minions: brb

 

shirogaNYA: OH FUCK

 

Hermione GAYnger: RIP HIFUMI

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: HE ABOUT TO GET EVISCERATED

 

peel the avocado: HIS DICK WILL BE CUT OFF

 

ultimatePENIS: N STUCK IN THE WOUND

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: I AM  D R I P P I N G  TO MY  C O R E

 

shylock homos: MIU SHUT THE FUCK UP WITH THOSE NOISES I CAN HEAR YOU FROM DOWN THE HALL

 

catch these lesbian hands: well we know now that hifumi isn’t going to heaven

 

shirogaNYA: NOOO MY ANIME WATCHING BUDDY

 

Hermione GAYnger: your W H A T

 

omaGOD: PRESS F TO PAY RESPECTS

 

delete your account: F

 

Hermione GAYnger: F

 

shylock homos: F

 

ultimatePENIS: F

 

peel the avocado: F

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: F

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: F

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: F

 

www.do-robots-have-dicks.com: why is everyone pressing F?

 

omaGOD: WE ARE PAYING OUR RESPECTS

 

omaGOD: YOU SHOULD DO THE SAME

 

www.do-robots-have-dicks.com: respects? did someone die?

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN KEEBS

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: HIFUMI IS ABOUT TO FUCKING DIE

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: KIYO IS GOING TO MURDER HIM

 

www.do-robots-have-dicks.com: oh

 

www.do-robots-have-dicks.com: then im not paying any respects to him

 

www.do-robots-have-dicks.com: he asked me if id seen any good robot porn lately

 

shirogaNYA: omg

 

catch these lesbian hands: actually I retract my F

 

omaGOD: …have you?

 

www.do-robots-have-dicks.com: of course not!

 

i fucking hate minions: I have returned

 

catch these lesbian hands: :ooo

 

Hermione GAYnger: welcome back minionfucker69

 

ultimatePENIS: o ng

 

catch these lesbian hands: HIMIKO HOLY SHIT

 

shylock homos: oh my god

 

omaGOD changed I fucking hate minions’s name to minionfucker69

 

peel the avocado: HHHHHHHHJESUS FUCKING CHRIST

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: THE MINIONFUCKER DOTH RETURN

 

god is dead and we killed him: oma do you WANT to die??

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: “hey guys minionfucker69 here and welcome back to my minecraft lets play today we’re doing the despicable me mod”

 

god is dead and we killed him: RYOMA DO YOU WANT TO DIE

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: what kind of question is that

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: of fucking course

 

minionfucker69 changed their name to yeet I guess

 

yeet I guess deleted themselves from The REAL Disaster of the Ultimate Academy

 

omaGOD: oh wow

 

delete your account: I applaud him for his bravery

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: smart move

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: god I wish that were me

 

shirogaNYA: wait is hifumi dead or??

 

god is dead and we killed him: HE DESTROYED IT

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: what

 

god is dead and we killed him: KIYO DESTROYED THE STATUE

 

shirogaNYA: oh my

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: YOOOOOOO

 

ultimatePENIS: doing gods work I see

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: aww man. before I even got to see it

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: miu u worry me sometimes

 

delete your account: out of all the things she’s said so far, that’s the one that worries you?

 

they-followin-me-ma: oh no! all your hard work is wasted :(

 

god is dead and we killed him: aww do not worry gonta! :D

 

delete your account: hes right though. even if the statue was an insult to the gods themselves, you spent a while working on it

 

god is dead and we killed him: dw about it

 

god is dead and we killed him: im not even mad

 

god is dead and we killed him: I was gonna destroy it myself anyway

 

shirogaNYA: what about hifumi’s $150?

 

god is dead and we killed him: I used it to buy the supplies

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: all that money?

 

god is dead and we killed him: nah

 

god is dead and we killed him: I do sculpture commissions for like $25

 

god is dead and we killed him: the rest of that money was repayment for what he was making me do

 

delete your account: that’s fair

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: how much would it cost for a sculpture of a minion orgy?

 

god is dead and we killed him: omg

 

omaGOD: $69

 

omaGOD: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

delete your account: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

Hermione GAYnger: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

ultimatePENIS: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

shylock homos: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

peel the avocado: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

shirogaNYA: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

yeet I guess has joined The REAL Disaster of the Ultimate Academy

 

god is dead and we killed him: kiyo help me

 

yeet I guess has changed their name to ( ͡ ° ͜ ʖ ͡ °)

 

god is dead and we killed him: F U C K

 

Chapter Text

---Saturday, November 25th, 9:03am---

 

 

omaGOD: now, where were we

 

omaGOD: ah yes

 

omaGOD: LET THE GAME CONTINUE

 

shirogaNYA: tbh I forgot we were even playing a game

 

delete your account: oh right. this again

 

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°): I still have not recovered.

 

god is dead and we killed him: neither has hifumi

 

god is dead and we killed him: you gave him quite the earful

 

god is dead and we killed him: “you. are a disgrace. who do you think you are? minion porn? really? you get pleasure out of perceiving those banana-fucking bullshit-speaking twats undressed and exposed? does minion vagina make you hard? DOES IT? TELL ME NOW SO THAT I MAY HAVE AN EXCUSE TO PROJECT YOUR ASS TO THE 3RD DIMENSION ASTRAL PLANE BITCH”

 

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°): cough cough

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: wow

 

peel the avocado: I want this on my tombstone

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: AW DAMN I WISH ID BEEN THERE

 

omaGOD: for the love of god STOP TALKING ABOUT MINION COCK

 

shirogaNYA: do minions have thrussies?

 

omaGOD: S T O P

 

Hermione GAYnger: wait if female minions do not exist then how do they reproduce

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: …woah

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: some of them have pussies. some of them don’t. its natural selection

 

omaGOD: P L E A S E  S T O P

 

Hermione GAYnger: and why are there so many of them

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: minion orgies

 

shirogaNYA: o m g

 

peel the avocado: I can HEAR it

 

shirogaNYA: OH FUCK

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: FUCK YOU RANTARO I CAN HEAR IT TO

 

god is dead and we killed him: FUCK I CANT GET THOSE NOISES OUT OF MY HEAD

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: IT SOUNDS LIKE THIS

 

shylock homos: MIU WHAT IS THAT NOISEE

 

www.do-robots-have-dicks.com: what are those ungodly noises?

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: IT’S THE SOUND OF A MINION ORGY

 

Hermione GAYnger: thankS! I hate it

 

ultimatePENIS: hIMIKO YOU ASKED THE QUESTION

 

Hermione GAYnger: tbh… I have no regrets

 

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°): himiko you are one door down from me if anymore minion shit comes out of your mouth im walking over there

 

catch these lesbian hands: do that and ill break ur legs you folklore cunt

 

shirogaNYA: F O L K L O R E  C U N T

 

ultimatePENIS: DKSKDKSKDKDJDKSJD

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: KIYO PLEASE MIU’S THE ONE REPLICATING THE SOUND OF A MINION ORGY GO KILL HER

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: YO ANG WHATS THE STATUS OF MY MINION COMMISSION

 

god is dead and we killed him: GO FUCK YOURSELF

 

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°): congratulations you just triggered a Vietnam flashback

 

omaGOD: A H E M

 

delete your account: nobody wants to play your game oma

 

peel the avocado: yeah go fuck a minion you gremlin

 

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°): please for the love of god don’t

 

shylock homos: aww come on guys this is fun!!

 

ultimatePENIS: it is pretty hilarious

 

omaGOD: thank you!!

 

god is dead and we killed him: kiyo please for the love of atua change your username

 

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°): very well

 

( ͡ ° ͜ ʖ ͡ °) changed their name to hey soul sister

 

hey soul sister: better?

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: …no comment

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: ive got no response

 

Hermione GAYnger: no objections here

 

catch these lesbian hands: noope

 

omaGOD: OKAYYYYYY LETS GOOO

 

omaGOD: this ones a quote!!

 

omaGOD: “every time someone yells at me I can feel my dick throb and my twelve pussies quiver n it makes me sad but at the same time it makes me feel fucking incredible so please scream at me some more daddy”

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: i

 

Hermione GAYnger: W H A T  T H E  F U C K

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: I HAVE SO MANY QUESTIONS

 

ultimatePENIS: HOLY FUCK

 

ultimatePENIS: ONE DICK TWELVE PUSSIES????

 

shirogaNYA: WOW FIFTY SHADES OF GAY LOOKS INCREDIBLE

 

shirogaNYA: ****GRAY I MEANT GRAY

 

catch these lesbian hands: BRB IM BLEACHING MY FUCKING EYEBALLS

 

peel the avocado: FGDYGHJHBVCFDERTYBVCXDSERTYUIJNBVCXDS

 

peel the avocado: HOT DAMN

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: THAT’S SOME KINKY SHIT RITE DERE

 

delete your account: oh come on this one’s obvious

 

delete your account: its miu

 

shirogaNYA: mhm

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: absolutely

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: no doubt about it

 

ultimatePENIS: obviously

 

hey soul sister: of course

 

god is dead and we killed him: duh

 

Hermione GAYnger: completely

 

www.do-robots-have-dicks.com: I know for a fact that this is miu

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: OH COME ON STOP ASSUMING

 

www.do-robots-have-dicks.com: im not assuming

 

peel the avocado: you have proof??

 

www.do-robots-have-dicks.com: picture me, at 3am on a Friday. I hear a knock on the door. I get up to answer, and I am greeted with miu. she is both drunk and high. her eyes have rolled completely to the back of her head, showing only the white. she somehow looks happy, depressed and incredibly horny all at once. she looks me dead in the eyes and says this exact thing, then promptly leaves. the scream I uttered still rings in my head to this day.

 

peel the avocado: omg

 

ultimatePENIS: FUCK I WISH ID BEEN THERE

 

catch these lesbian hands: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA WOW

 

hey soul sister: somehow I am both incredibly disturbed but completely un phased at the same time

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: I REMEMBER THIS

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: I REMEMBER HEARING KEEBO SCREAM BUT I NEVER KNEW WHY

 

shirogaNYA: aaaaaa those were the days

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: …id completely forgotten about that

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: whoops

 

omaGOD: did his scream make your twelve pussies quiver?

 

hey soul sister: S T O P

 

peel the avocado: where the heck did you get both alcohol and weed ON CAMPUS??

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: oh you wanna know? hmu then

 

peel the avocado: wait no

 

shirogaNYA: RANTARO :OOO

 

ultimatePENIS: DRUGS ARE BAD DO NOT DO DRUGS

 

catch these lesbian hands: THERE WILL BE NO MARR-JU-WANNA IN THIS CHRISTIAN SERVER

 

Hermione GAYnger: IS THAT A WEED?? IM CALLING THE POLICE

 

god is dead and we killed him: IS THAT A POLICE?? IM CALLING THE WEED

 

peel the avocado: please stop

 

ultimatePENIS: this is the WEED police!! put ur hands up HIGH!!!

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: was

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: was that pun intentional

 

omaGOD: MOVING ON

 

omaGOD: well not that its unclear but YOU GUYS ARE RIGHT

 

Hermione GAYnger: that was too easy

 

omaGOD: next one!!!!

 

omaGOD: a google search!!!

 

shylock homos: dear god

 

Hermione GAYnger: my heart is pounding

 

shirogaNYA: im shaking

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: im weak

 

peel the avocado: knees week

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: arms are heavy

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: vomit’s on his sweater already

 

www.do-robots-have-dicks.com: M O M ‘ S  S P A G H U E T T I

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: EYYYYY KEEBO

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: WELL DONE

 

omaGOD: A H E M

 

omaGOD: anyways this is the search:

 

omaGOD: “how to deal with raising teenagers”

 

delete your account: oh wow

 

Hermione GAYnger: hmmmm

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: who said that tho??

 

god is dead and we killed him: uuuhh

 

ultimatePENIS: let me think

 

shylock homos: its so obvious

 

shylock homos: do you guys seriously not know??

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: bro all of us are teenagers, which one of us needs to raise teenagers??

 

shylock homos: wow kaito you really are a dumbass

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: WHAT

 

delete your account: OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH

 

omaGOD: THAT’S MY BOYFRIEND

 

god is dead and we killed him: ROASTED

 

catch these lesbian hands: HA GET CUCKED YOU DEGENERATE

 

Hermione GAYnger: CONSIDER YOURSELF C U C K E D

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: I feel so loved

 

shylock homos: NO ONE KNOWS WHO SEARCHED THAT??

 

www.do-robots-have-dicks.com: I cannot think of anyone…

 

shylock homos: guys

 

shylock homos: ITS KIRUMI

 

god is dead and we killed him: OOOOOHHHHHHHHH

 

catch these lesbian hands: THAT MAKES SENSE

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: oh I see. makes sense

 

www.do-robots-have-dicks.com: but kirumi is a teenager like us, why does she need help raising a teen?

 

mothergoose: not a teen

 

mothergoose: more like 15

 

www.do-robots-have-dicks.com: fifteen?!

 

shylock homos: keebs shes talking about us

 

www.do-robots-have-dicks.com: oh

 

hey soul sister: aahh that’s understandable

 

mothergoose: well done shuichi. ive raised you well

 

shylock homos: thank you mother

 

omaGOD: MOM HOW COULD YOU

 

mothergoose: I thought I told you to stop calling me “mom”

 

omaGOD: but everyone else calls you mom!

 

mothergoose: everyone can call me mom

 

mothergoose: anyone but you

 

omaGOD: D:

 

mothergoose: anyways, I have business I must attend to. please continue your… game.

 

god is dead and we killed him: you got it mom!

 

peel the avocado: sure thing mom!

 

hey soul sister: yes, mother.

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: understood ma

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: YES DADDY

 

catch these lesbian hands: miu what the fuck

 

mothergoose: actually make that 14 teenagers

 

mothergoose: consider yourself disowned, iruma

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: WHAT

 

peel the avocado: OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH

 

omaGOD: wow that was boring

 

omaGOD: next one!!

 

omaGOD: oooo it’s a quote

 

omaGOD: “everytime I talk to kiyo he ends up towering over me and my eyes end up at the same level of his crotch”

 

hey soul sister: what

 

god is dead and we killed him: dssdjkskjjksjdkjsj

 

ultimatePENIS: BVCDRTYUJBVCERYBVCDEYUJBVCFDSE

 

Hermione GAYnger: huh

 

catch these lesbian hands: well then

 

peel the avocado: ITS RYOMA

 

omaGOD: HOW DO YOU KNOW

 

peel the avocado: BECAUSE 1) HES SHORT

 

peel the avocado: 2) IVE MADE THIS EXACT OBSERVATION BEFORE

 

peel the avocado: AND IVE TOLD HIM THIS EXACT THING

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: fuck you rantaro

 

peel the avocado: “yknow ryoma at your height you could stare kiyo square in the dick without being too obvious”

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: YTREWSXCVBKOIUYTRESCVBKOIUYTRESCVBN

 

Hermione GAYnger: YOOOOOOOOOO

 

shylock homos: WOW RYOMA

 

ultimatePENIS: WELL DONE

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: HEY ITS NOT LIKE U PURPOUSEFULLY DID IT

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: I ACCIDENTALY LOWERED MY HEAD AND MY EYES JUST HAPPENED TO LAND THERE

 

hey soul sister: …accidentaly?

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: they just happened to land there?

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: I THOUGHT IT WAS SUBTLE ENOUGH FOR YOU NOT TO NOTICE

 

hey soul sister: if you think you were being subtle you are highly mistaken

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: im gonna kick you in the crotch if you don’t stfu

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: hey ryoma

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: what

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: I don’t think your foot can reach his crotch, maybe try headbutting it instead

 

god is dead and we killed him: OOOF

 

ultimatePENIS: CXKBVDSRTYUIKNBVCSERUIKJBVCSERTY

 

shylock homos: WOW NICE GOING KAITO UR ABOUT TO DIE

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: WAIT NO

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: RYOMA THAT WAS A JOKE

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: MAKI HELP ME

 

delete your account: you brought this upon yourself

 

delete your account: you’re on your own

 

shirogaNYA: YEEEOUCH

 

catch these lesbian hands: WELL DONE MAKI

 

Hermione GAYnger: RIP KAITO

 

omaGOD: well you guys were right first of all

 

omaGOD: second of all, kiyo, I wanted to let you know that I also happen to stare directly at your dick when we talk

 

hey soul sister: w h a t

 

omaGOD: A N Y W A Y S  NEXT ONE

 

Hermione GAYnger: WAIT

 

omaGOD: ya?

 

Hermione GAYnger: before we continue

 

Hermione GAYnger: let me just do one thing

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: uh

 

shirogaNYA: sure thing

 

shylock homos: im scared

 

Hermione GAYnger changed hey soul sister’s name to shinGUCCI

 

catch these lesbian hands: OH MY GOD

 

ultimatePENIS: MNGCYFGHVDESRTYUYIHCESEWUTYUIY

 

catch these lesbian hands: WELL DONE HIMIKO

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: THANK YOU

 

god is dead and we killed him: THANK YOU FOR DOING ATUA’S WORK

 

shinGUCCI: why this all of a sudden?

 

Hermione GAYnger: idk

 

Hermione GAYnger: I just repeated your name in my head and then poof

 

shinGUCCI: to be fair, this is much better than that god forbidden name you gave me earlier.

 

omaGOD: oh you mean

 

shinGUCCI: don’t you dare

 

omaGOD: minionfucker69? ;)

 

shinGUCCI: I swear to god

 

omaGOD: ANYWAYS LETS CONTINUE

 

omaGOD: this next one is a google search

 

omaGOD: “funny bug videos”

 

peel the avocado: gonta

 

ultimatePENIS: gonta

 

shylock homos: gonta

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: gonta

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: gonta

 

shinGUCCI: gonta

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: gonta

 

delete your account: gonta

 

catch these lesbian hands: gonta

 

Hermione GAYnger: gonta

 

www.do-robots-have-dicks.com: gonta

 

shirogaNYA: gonta

 

god is dead and we killed him: gonta

 

omaGOD: come on that was easy

 

they-followin-me-ma: gonta likes watching funny bug videos! :D

 

ultimatePENIS: I just started crying

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: we love you gonta

 

peel the avocado: you are amazing

 

shinGUCCI: such a pure boy

 

catch these lesbian hands: the only non-degenerate male here

 

shylock homos: you’re doing amazing sweetie

 

shirogaNYA: the only tolerable one here

 

Hermione GAYnger: best boy best boy best boy

 

mothergoose: out of all of my children, you are my favourite

 

god is dead and we killed him: you deserve the world

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: anyone who says otherwise can feel my wrath

 

delete your account: if anyone disses gonta I will personally go over to your room and stab you in the eyes

 

they-followin-me-ma: gonta love everyone too! :DD

 

omaGOD: …moving on

 

omaGOD: oooooo the next one is a quote!

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: BRING IT

 

omaGOD: “whats up I am homosexual. I like cock. dick. penis. alla dat. you cnt even judge me. yeah im gay but so what. sowhat. swht. ill say it again, I like men. me? het? nah bro”

 

shirogaNYA: wh

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: wow

 

catch these lesbian hands: me at like 3 am but replace all the dude stuff with girl stuff

 

Hermione GAYnger: we get it, tenko, ur a lesbian

 

god is dead and we killed him: that could be any of the dudes

 

shinGUCCI: what is with all the spelling mistakes?

 

omaGOD: this was actually a text I got at 3 am on a Monday a couple weeks ago

 

delete your account: why does stuff like this always happen at 3 am

 

peel the avocado: im actually very curious as to who said this

 

peel the avocado: we can rule all the girls out soo

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: nope

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: wasn’t me

 

shinGUCCI: god I hope not

 

shylock homos: not me

 

peel the avocado: well it wasn’t me soooooo

 

omaGOD: hmmph

 

omaGOD: one of you said it

 

omaGOD: you just don’t remember

 

omaGOD: isn’t that right

 

omaGOD: BABE? ;)

 

shylock homos: huh

 

shylock homos: WHAT

 

shirogaNYA: WHWHWHWHWH WHAT

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: WAIT HOLY SHIT

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: HOT DAMN SHYHARA

 

ultimatePENIS: SHUICHI OH MY GOD

 

shinGUCCI: WELL THEN

 

peel the avocado: NFYJNBVCDSRTYUKNBVCXDSRTYUIJ

 

peel the avocado: RELATABLE AS F U CK

 

shylock homos: WHEN DID I SAY THIS

 

omaGOD: I have proof shu

 

omaGOD: don’t escape the truth

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: theres nothing wrong with liking COCK

 

shylock homos: I must have been disassociating real bad cause I don’t remember this AT ALL

 

shirogaNYA: well it was 3 am so

 

catch these lesbian hands: understandable

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: what kind of drugs were you on bro holy shit

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: shyhara doesn’t do drugs

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: he has the bravery of one (1) chicken nugget do you really think he would do drugs

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: that’s true

 

omaGOD: anyway it was the biggest mood I had ever read and I want it framed

 

shylock homos: …thank I guess

 

omaGOD: aaaannnd here’s another google search!

 

omaGOD: “what the fuck is a shot put ball”

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: compared to the other ones this one is actually normal

 

delete your account: who types “what the fuck is” when they wanna know what something is??

 

Hermione GAYnger: this person, apparently

 

god is dead and we killed him: why a shot put ball???

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: I have no clue why but I feel as if this was rantaro

 

omaGOD: C O R R E C T

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon : EYYYYYYYY

 

peel the avocado : im not mad. it was a genuine question

 

catch these lesbian hands: wow kaito actually got something right!!

 

Hermione GAYnger: good job!!

 

mothergoose: mother is proud of you.

 

they-followin-me-ma: gonta is proud of you!!!

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: you guys are praising me yet I feel offended somehow

 

shylock homos: why a shot put ball?

 

peel the avocado: cause I wasn’t exactly sure what it was

 

shylock homos: dude what did you think a shot put ball was??

 

peel the avocado: idk

 

peel the avocado: I thought it was a euphemism

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: there it is

 

catch these lesbian hands: it always relates back to penis doesn’t it

 

peel the avocado: I thought it meant like. grabbing a dick

 

shirogaNYA: I swear to god if you hit paste and let loose the lenny face I will conk you in the head with a shot put ball

 

peel the avocado: CHILL

 

peel the avocado: yknow I had a dream like that once

 

god is dead and we killed him: what

 

shinGUCCI: huh?

 

peel the avocado: I had a dream where tsumugi killed me with a shot put ball

 

peel the avocado: that’s why I wanted to know what they were

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: what kind of fucked up dreams were you having

 

peel the avocado: theres also this bear

 

peel the avocado: he kinda looks like usami but hes black on one side and white on the other

 

peel the avocado: n hes got a red eye

 

peel the avocado: not to mention that all of you are there too

 

peel the avocado: and we’re being forced to kill each other

 

catch these lesbian hands: mhm

 

Hermione GAYnger: sure jan

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: you okay dude

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: NOW THAT’S SOME FUCKED UP SHIT

 

god is dead and we killed him: well then

 

shinGUCCI: turns out that shuichi’s not the one on drugs, but rantaro

 

delete your account: im leaving

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: yep bye

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: this is getting weird

 

peel the avocado: WAIT GUYS PLEASE

 

omaGOD: yeeeaaah im gonna gooooo

 

omaGOD: the game will continue later ;))

 

ultimatePENIS: ill be in my lab disassociating for 5 hours if anybody needs me

 

peel the avocado: AW COME ON

 

peel the avocado: GUYS

 

peel the avocado: well I might as well go to

 

peel the avocado: if anybody needs me, ill be wandering around

 

peel the avocado: avoiding the library

 

Chapter Text

----Saturday, November 25th, 11:37pm---

 

  

omaGOD: lets resume!!!!

 

shinGUCCI: lets. not

 

god is dead and we killed him: please no

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: lemme get uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: no

 

catch these lesbian hands: ugh

 

Hermione GAYnger: hhhhhhhhhh no

 

omaGOD: come on guys!!!!!

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: die you cummy fucker

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: still haven’t forgiven you for my username :I

 

delete your account: go cuck yourself

 

omaGOD: well

 

omaGOD: whatevs

 

omaGOD: so far, kirumi, angie, shuichi, gonta, ryoma, miu, kaito and rantaro have all been guessed

 

omaGOD: ssooooo YALL ARE SAFE

 

peel the avocado: not safe from the bear that haunts my dreams

 

delete your account: stfu rantaro nobody cares

 

peel the avocado: :(

 

peel the avocado: I didn’t die for this :((((

 

shylock homos: whos not here??

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: I saw keebo earlier, he was hiding from soda

 

delete your account: again???

 

delete your account: hes. Always hiding

 

Hermione GAYnger: I have a spell to make him go away

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: …pardon?

 

catch these lesbian hands: Wow himiko!!! Lets hear it!!!

 

Hermione GAYnger: “RAVIOLI RAVIOLI DON’T LEWD K1-B-OLI”

 

peel the avocado: …creative

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: AWWWWWEE YEEEEEEEE

 

ShinGUCCI: I highly doubt that will work.

 

Hermione GAYnger: :(

 

catch these lesbian hands: hey kiyo

 

ShinGUCCI: what

 

catch these lesbian hands: ravioli ravioli go fuck yourselfioli

 

ShinGUCCI: …

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: EYYYY

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: B E A U T I F U L

 

ultimatePENIS: nice anime reference!!!

 

shirogaNYA: …spongebob?

 

god is dead and we killed him: oooo you pissed off tsumugi

 

god is dead and we killed him: she gonna write a tunglr blog post about how “commoners” are “ruinning anime”

 

shirogaNYA: take that back piano dumbass >:I

 

ultimatePENIS: I know what I said

 

ultimatePENIS: >:3

 

omaGOD: anybody else missing???

 

shylock homos: wheres mom?

 

Hermione GAYnger: kirumi is with teruteru

 

ShinGUCCI: OH NO

 

god is dead and we killed him: dear atua,,,,,

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: god save kirumi

 

ultimatePENIS: she doesn’t deserve this!!!

 

catch these lesbian hands: I hope kirumi fucking kills him

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: LMAO SAME

 

shylock homos: why???

 

shylock homos: what did sausage italiano ever do to you???

 

ultimatePENIS: s a u s a g e  i t a l i a n o

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: HE KEEPS TALKING ABOUT HIS MEAT

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: LIKE

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: STOP TRYNA GET ME TO SUCK YA DICK MARIO MINION GREMLIN

 

shirogaNYA: o m g

 

Hermione GAYnger: DRTYUKNBVCDERTYUJFDRTYUNBVCDRTYU

 

god is dead and we killed him: M A R I O  M I N I O N  G R E M L I N

 

ShinGUCCI: E N O U G H

 

peel the avocado: im sure they’ll be cooking a mean sausage ;))))

 

mothergoose: correct

 

mothergoose: however

 

mothergoose: the only sausage going on the chopping block is his own.

 

shirogaNYA: YOOOOOOOOOO

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: MOM STRIKES BACK

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: OOOFF KILLEM DADDY

 

god is dead and we killed him: MIU FOR THE LOVE OF ATUA IM BEGGING YOU

 

mothergoose: miu. You are grounded

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: WHAT

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: HOW CAN YOU DO THIS TO YOUR OWN CHILD???

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: YOUR FAVOURITE OUT OF YOUR 15 CHILDREN???

 

mothergoose: Fifteen? I could have sworn I only have 14.

 

catch these lesbian hands: YOU’VE BEEN DISSOWNED

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: NOOOO

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: MOTHER MINION WHY

 

god is dead and we killed him: S T O P

 

delete your account: JFC

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: IM YELLING

 

shylock homos: OH GOD I CAN HEAR HER CHANTING

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: MOTHER MINION MOTHER MINION MOTHER MINION MO

 

ultimatePENIS: BLEASE. STOP

 

shinGUCCI: I am this close to fucking killing myself

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: eternal mood right dere

 

peel the avocado: S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-STOP

 

omaGOD: inhale

 

omaGOD: EVERYTIME WE GET ON THIS GOD DAMN CHAT THE TOPIC ALWAYS CHANGES TO MINIONS WHY DOES THIS ALWAYS HAPPEN I SWEAR TO GOD IF WE TALK ABOUT THOSE KINDER EGG SURPRISE CAPSULE LOOKING MOTHERFUCKERS ONE MORE TIME IM THROWING MYSELF OFF A CLIFF AND IM TAKING SHUICHI WITH ME

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: ....AND EVERYTIME WE KISS I SWEAR I COULD FLY

 

shirogaNYA: wow what a bop

 

god is dead and we killed him: I only listen to REAL music

 

peel the avocado: only 90s kids remember this one

 

shylock homos: im not jumping off a cliff with you oma

 

omaGOD: WHY

 

shylock homos: im not ready to die

 

shylock homos: …yet

 

omaGOD: ARE YOU ABANDONNING ME

 

omaGOD: BOYFS WHO ARE GAY TOGETHER STAY TOGETHER

 

omaGOD: BOYFS WHO CRY TOGETHER DIE TOGETHER

 

omaGOD: BOYFS WHO TEXT EACH OTHER AT 3 AM AND BITCH ABOUT SHITTY CEREAL TOGETHER CAN BE HOMOSEXUAL TOGETHER

 

ShinGUCCI: that… doesn’t even rhyme

 

omaGOD: doesn’t have to

 

omaGOD: our love is THAT strong

 

catch these lesbian hands: please be gay somewhere else

 

Hermione GAYnger: okay “catch these lesbian hands”

 

catch these lesbian hands: ...touché

 

ultimatePENIS: are we not playing the game???

 

omaGOD: thanks kaede!!! Nice Segway ;))

 

omaGOD: NEXT ONE IIISSSSS

 

omaGOD: a google search!

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: hoo boi

 

ultimatePENIS: im. scared

 

god is dead and we killed him: minion porn pt.2

 

ShinGUCCI: angie I swear to F U C K

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: DESPICABLE ME 4

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: COMING TO A KIYO NEAR YOU

 

ShinGUCCI: and im out. Fuck y’all id rather spend time with hiro

 

Hermione GAYnger: ouch

 

catch these lesbian hands: that’s harsh

 

god is dead and we killed him: oof

 

shirogaNYA: understandable have a nice day

 

omaGOD: bls. no more minions

 

shylock homos: I agree. Pls continue oma :p

 

omaGOD: thanks boo! :)

 

omaGOD: google search isss: “funny cat videos”

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: gonta

 

Hermione GAYnger: mhm

 

god is dead and we killed him: ya

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: yeah

 

shirogaNYA: obviously

 

peel the avocado: of course

 

shylock homos: uh duh

 

ultimatePENIS: yeep

 

omaGOD: alla y’all are…

 

omaGOD: WRONG

 

shylock homos: what???

 

omaGOD: GONTAS ALREADY BEEN GUESSED

 

ultimatePENIS: wait really??? Then I have no clue

 

god is dead and we killed him: uuuuuhhhhhhhhh

 

catch these lesbian hands: ive no idea tbh

 

shylock homos: whoever searched that should just come forward, theres no shame or anythin

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: YEAH THERES NO SHAME IN ENJOYING P U S S Y

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: but why would oma choose this search instead of a weird or embarrassing one??

 

ShinGUCCI: it must have been chosen for being embarrassing, somehow.

 

Hermione GAYnger: which meannss….

 

Hermione GAYnger: oma chose it because he knew the culprit would be embarrassed about admitting it!!

 

catch these lesbian hands: GOOD DEDUCTION WORK HIMIKO!!! :D

 

shirogaNYA: culprit?

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: this aint a killing game, himiko

 

peel the avocado: it is

 

peel the avocado: IN MY NIGHTMARES

 

delete your account: I thought I told you to stfu

 

shylock homos: wait kiyo ur still here??

 

shylock homos: I thought you were with hiro???

 

ShinGUCCI: I was on my way to meet with him

 

ShinGUCCI: however

 

ShinGUCCI: I found him eating a banana whole

 

ShinGUCCI: like. Without even peeling it

 

ShinGUCCI: I think there were tear stains down his cheeks

 

shirogaNYA: omg

 

peel the avocado: god I wish I was there

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: BLEASE TELL ME YOU SPOKE TO HIM

 

ShinGUCCI: yes

 

ShinGUCCI: he looked me dead in the eyes and said:

 

ShinGUCCI: “ive been trying to peel it for the past 2 hours. ive given up at this point”

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: me as fuck

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: relatable

 

god is dead and we killed him: two hours????

 

god is dead and we killed him: jfc

 

ShinGUCCI: I left without saying a word.

 

ultimatePENIS: JHDSWEYUIKNBVCDSEUIJVCDSEUI

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: EYYYYYYYYY THAT’S B R U T A L

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: WAIT

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: DID YOU SAY

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: B A N A N A S??

 

ShinGUCCI: talk about minions again and im going over to your lab and breaking everything in sight

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: ee

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: wow she shut up pretty fast

 

god is dead and we killed him: finally!!! some quiet!!!

 

omaGOD: im taking it that nobody has any guesses??

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: nope. Honestly I have no clue

 

delete your account: of course you don’t kaito

 

delete your account: you’re clueless as fucc

 

shirogaNYA: AYOYE D’ON

 

god is dead and we killed him: OOF

 

ultimatePENIS: SIZZLED

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: y know what

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: just for that

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: im gonna go ahead and say it

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: it was maki

 

catch these lesbian hands: ppftt

 

Hermione GAYnger: yeah nice try

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: do you honestly think wed believe that??

 

god is dead and we killed him: theres no way it was maki

 

shylock homos: ya man

 

UltimatePENIS: mhm

 

omaGOD: …

 

ultimatePENIS: oma??

 

omaGOD: D I N G D I N G D I N G

 

shirogaNYA: wh

 

omaGOD: LUMINARY OF THE STARS GETS IT RIGHT

 

shylock homos: he W H A T

 

god is dead and we killed him: :oo

 

ultimatePENIS: BVCDSTYUJBVCDSERTYUJHVGCFD

 

delete your account: FUCK YOU

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

 

Hermione GAYnger: NOW I SEE WHY OMA CHOSE THAT ONE

 

Hermione GAYnger: I NEVER THOUGHT MS ULTIMATE ASSASIN WOULD LIKE THT KIND OF STUFF

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: EYYYYYYYYY

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: THAT WAS UNEXPECTED

 

ShinGUCCI: OH MY

 

delete your account has deleted themselves from The REAL Disaster of the Ultimate Academy

 

omaGOD: …whoops

 

ultimatePENIS: aww man

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: brb ill go talk to her

 

Hermione GAYnger: I hope she doesn’t think we’re making fun of her :(

 

catch these lesbian hands: maybe we should put the game on pause

 

omaGOD: good idea

 

omaGOD: we’ll resume later!!!

 

omaGOD: ;D

 

 

 

---Saturday, November 25th, 1:04pm---

 

 

delete your account has joined The REAL Disaster of the Ultimate Academy

 

delete your account: im back.

 

delete your account: nobody say a word.

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: understood

 

shylock homos: u got it

 

shirogaNYA: yep

 

Hermione GAYnger: absolutely

 

catch these lesbian hands: mhm

 

god is dead and we killed him: sure thing

 

omaGOD: …now then

 

omaGOD: is everyone here??

 

ShinGUCCI: Apart from keebo, I believe so

 

www.do-robots-have-dicks.com: actually, I decided to join you all.

 

they-followin-me-ma: Welcome keebo! :D

 

www.do-robots-have-dicks.com: Hello, Gonta! :)

 

shirogaNYA: pure

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: so… did soda catch you??

 

www.do-robots-have-dicks.com: no, usami found out and started scolding him.

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: serves him right!!!

 

omaGOD: eyyy so we all here!!

 

shylock homos: wait

 

shylock homos: where are kaede and kirumi?

 

catch these lesbian hands: I went to speak with Chef Mario but he told me kirumi had not stayed with him long

 

peel the avocado: C H E F  M A R I O

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: did he ask you to suck his dick??

 

catch these lesbian hands: he sure did

 

catch these lesbian hands: I Neo-Akido’ed the degenerate to the wall

 

Hermione GAYnger: mhm

 

Hermione GAYnger: I was there

 

Hermione GAYnger: it was fucking exhilarating

 

Hermione GAYnger: I filmed it

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: OOOFFOFF I GOTTA SEE THAT

 

peel the avocado: SEND IT TO ME

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: I’m sure he enjoyed it

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: LMAO PROBS

 

shirogaNYA: wait, so then where IS kirumi??

 

god is dead and we killed him: I believe she is helping the Headmaster!

 

omaGOD: of course she is

 

shylock homos: she just cant ignore her duties, can she?

 

ShinGUCCI: understandable, but what about Kaede?

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: She might be in her lab, I think she has a piano performance coming up soon

 

shylock homos: lets just leave them to their things

 

ShinGUCCI: yes, lets.

 

omaGOD: ALRIGHT ALRIGHT ALRIGHT

 

omaGOD: LETS DO A FEW MORE

 

omaGOD: NEXT WE HAVE A QUOTE

 

shylock homos: ooooo

 

shinGUCCI: lets hear it

 

shirogaNYA: I haven’t been guessed yet. Im scared

 

omaGOD: “correct me if im wrong, but I believe you are an “ignorant slut”

 

delete your account: oh my god

 

peel the avocado: MNVCSRTYJBVDERTYUIKJVDSERTYUJNBVCDSW

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: H O T  D A M N

 

ShinGUCCI: :OO

 

shirogaNYA: HOLY S H IT

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: THIS IS INCREDIBLE!!!!!!!!!!

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: well

 

omaGOD: ;)))

 

delete your account: If I had to guess, I would say keebo.

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: ….OOOOOHHHHH

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: HELL YYYYYYYEEEEEEAAHH

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: NO ONE ELSE COULD INSULT LIKE THAT IN SUCH A POLITE TONE

 

www.do-robots-have-dicks.com: …

 

ShinGUCCI: Is that an admission of guilt?

 

god is dead and we killed him: WOW!

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: Guilty as charged, it seems :P

 

www.do-robots-have-dicks.com: I simply heard Miu say it one day to describe an ignorant person.

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: Well done, Miu

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: HEY WHY YOU BLAMING ME

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: Its like a baby copying everything the mom says :D

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: SHUT THE FUCK UP MEMEMOTA

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: THE FUCK DID YOU JUST CALL ME

 

Hermione GAYnger: OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHH

 

catch these lesbian hands: ASDFGHJKL’MNBVCDER

 

www.do-robots-have-dicks.com: I do not understand, what was the problem?

 

ShinGUCCI: Do you not understand what you said?

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: …just drop it

 

delete your account: google it, keebo

 

god is dead and we killed him >:3

 

www.do-robots-have-dicks.com: Very well.

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: 3…2…1…

 

www.do-robots-have-dicks.com has deleted themselves from The REAL Disaster of the Ultimate Academy

 

peel the avocado: HFDWERTYUJHGFDEUHGFDEYUHGFDE

 

shirogaNYA: THAT REMINDS ME OF WHEN IN MOVIES A CHARACTER GETS BITTEN BY A ZOMBIE AND IT DOESN’T KICK IN RIGHT AWAY

 

Hermione GAYnger: THAT WAS GLORIOUS

 

shylock homos: I CAN HEAR DISTRESSED KEEBO NOISES

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: HAHAHAAAAA

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: YOU’VE MADE KEEBOY SAD

 

omaGOD: …that was boring lmao

 

omaGOD: lets do one more!!

 

Delete your account: finally this god forbidden game is ending

 

god is dead and we killed him: we are free

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: glorious day!!

 

shirogaNYA: !!!!!!!!

 

ShinGUCCI: AT LONG LAST

 

omaGOD: :(

 

omaGOD: anyway heres the quote:

 

omaGOD: “everytime people talk about their het crushes in front of me I lose 20 years of my life and grow ever so closer to finally dying”

 

Hermione GAYnger: oh my god

 

god is dead and we killed him: biggest mood right there

 

peel the avocado: itsa me

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: finally something interesting

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: hMhm I wOndEr WhO couLD hAve SAid thaT

 

delete your account: tenko.

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: :( ur ruining the suspense :((

 

ShinGUCCI: what suspense?

 

catch these lesbian hands: Im not ashamed!!

 

catch these lesbian hands: Its Fact bitch!!

 

Hermione GAYnger: yep

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: quite right

 

god is dead and we killed him: I agree!

 

omaGOD: that was disappointing!!! But the games over now :((

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: HALLELUHJIA

 

shinGUCCI: I… don’t think that’s how you spell it

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: I DNT FCKING CARE

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: NOW SUPREME FUCKER CAN LEAVE ME ALONE

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: FINALLY

 

Hermione GAYnger: F I N A L L Y

 

shirogaNYA: IM GONE!! YEET BITCH!!!

 

god is dead and we killed him: Good bye atua-damned idiot!!

 

shylock homos: W A IT

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: bro what are you doing

 

delete your account: what is it this time?

 

shylock homos: theres one more google search to guess

 

catch these lesbian hands: UGHHHHH

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: SHYHARA WHAT THE F U C K

 

god is dead and we killed him: LET US LEAVE

 

peel the avocado: DUDE WHY

 

omaGOD: there is???

 

ShinGUCCI: why are you surprised?

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: aren’t you two in kahoots?

 

omaGOD: I didn’t know there was a last one??

 

shylock homos: indeed there is.

 

shylock homos: “How to top when you are 5ft tall”

 

ShinGUCCI: …wh

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: NEVERMIND IM STAYING FOR THIS SHIT

 

peel the avocado: FGGVHFYRTHGFRTYHBVCDRTYJB

 

catch these lesbian hands: RYOMA IS THAT YOU

 

Hermione GAYnger: NAH MAN RYOMA IS 3FT TALL AND HE AINT GOT NO ONE TO TOP

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: I TAKE NO OFFENSE TO THAT SOMEHOW

 

god is dead and we killed him: WOW!!!! HOT DAMN!!!!

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: I MEAN IT’S A VALID QUESTION

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: HOW D O E S A 5FT TALL GREMLIN TOP??

 

delete your account: why don’t you ask shuichi, im sure he’d know first hand.

 

shylock homos: :I

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: YOOOOO

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: THIS BOY IS A BOTTOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMM

 

ShinGUCCI: That would mean the search belongs to kokichi, yes?

 

omaGOD: SHU HOW COULD YOUUUU

 

shylock homos: that’s payback for this god damned game

 

catch these lesbian hands: OOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHH

 

Hermione GAYnger: OMA PUTS RESEARCH INTO IT AT LEAST

 

Hermione GAYnger: MIU COULD USE A BIT OF THAT

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: W H A T

 

catch these lesbian hands: ROAST HER HIMIKO

 

shylock homos changed omaGOD’s username to how to top when you are 5ft tall

 

shylock homos: this your punishment

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: into the baby jail you go

 

how to top when you are 5ft tall: COME ON SHU

 

how to top when you are 5ft tall: AT LEAST KNOW THAT IM PUTTING RESEARCH INTO IT!!

 

shylock homos: doesn’t feel like that to me

 

delete your account: ..what

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: FUCKING OWNED BITCH

 

shirogaNYA: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: and on that note, im leaving

 

god is dead and we killed him: yeah ive got a minion commission to redo

 

ShinGUCCI: and ive got an angie to kill

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: IVE GOT A SODA TO EVISCERATE

 

they-followin-me-ma: Gonta go see Gundham and his cute hamsters! :D

 

shirogaNYA: I HAVE TO SEE THAT

 

shirogaNYA: I MIGHT JUST CRY FROM THE PURENESS

 

delete your account: im gonna find peko so we can bond over our hatred for kokichi

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: im gonna play Mario galaxy with chiaki

 

peel the avocado: ILL COME WITH YOU

 

peel the avocado: im gonna be luigi!!

 

catch these lesbian hands: Mondo challenged me to a fight so im gonna go kick his ass

 

Hermione GAYnger: Im gonna watch!!

 

shylock homos: I’m gonna go find kaede.

 

how to top when you are 5ft tall: YOU’RE ALL LEAVING ME AGAIN??

 

how to top when you are 5ft tall: well whatevs

 

how to top when you are 5ft tall: im going with shu

 

how to top when you are 5ft tall: I cant just leave him

 

how to top when you are 5ft tall: TOPLESS ;)

 

 

 

---Saturday, November 25th, 5:24pm---

 

 

this is how we do things in my country created a Group Chat

 

this is how we do things in my country: Alrighty! Welcome everyone!

 

lemme kill myselfie: there are. A lot of new names here

 

Marie Antoinette: it is my name in my dorm group chat

 

AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH: same here!!!

 

my suspicions are confirmed: I think we can determine who is who, correct?

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: well, I recognize a few from my dorm’s group chat

 

my suspicions are confirmed: to aid us, please type your names.

 

my suspicions are confirmed: Kirigiri

 

stab me daddy: Peko

 

literally crying: mmmikkan

 

Marie Antoinette: Celestia

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: Chiaki

 

Ultimate Little Sister: Komaru

 

this is how we do things in my country: Sonia

 

k a w a i i: sayaka

 

lemme kill myselfie: mahiru

 

AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH: Ibuki!

 

my suspicions are confirmed: there, that is much better.

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: sayaka I hate your username

 

k a w a i i: blame hifumi

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: that’s my usual game plan :)

 

lemme kill myselfie: Where is hiyoko?

 

stab me daddy: Please do not invite her in here, allow Mikan a safe space.

 

literally crying: tthhaankk youyu ppeko :’(

 

AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH: AWWWWW THAT’S SO CUTE, LOOKING AFTER HER AND ALL THAT

 

stab me daddy: …

 

lemme kill myselfie: yeah, maybe hiyoko shouldn’t be in here

 

Ultimate Little Sister: why aren’t any of the harmony dorm members here?

 

Marie Antoinette: we cannot let them interfere.

 

k a w a i i: wait, this isn’t a girl group chat?

 

k a w a i i: …soooo what is this?

 

my suspicions are confirmed: ah yes, sayaka, I believe you were absent during our discussion.

 

my suspicions are confirmed: as you may have noticed, those who were added are the friend groups of Kaede and Kirumi.

 

AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH: …what about leon??

 

lemme kill myselfie: hes a dude!! Keep him out

 

AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH: but hes in our music club!

 

lemme kill myselfie: :I

 

AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH: I guess ur right tho. He wouldn’t fit into this

 

my suspicions are confirmed: …anyways

 

my suspicions are confirmed: Sayaka, Ibuki, Komaru, Mahiru and Chiaki are in Kaede’s friend group.

 

my suspicions are confirmed: Celes, Sonia, Mikan, Peko and I are in Kirumi’s friend group.

 

literally crying: yyyess, tthtsass right

 

stab me daddy: Mikan, are you alright?

 

this is how we do things in my country: I believe she is having trouble typing correctly because of her trembling :(

 

literally crying: iiiimmmhiiimm sorryyyryy!!!

 

Ultimate Little Sister: Don’t worry about it, Mikan! You don’t need to apologize :D

 

Marie Antoinette: perfect. We are getting along nicely.

 

k a w a i i: sooo what was the group chat made for?

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: we need to discuss our plan.

 

k a w a i i: …plan?

 

my suspicions are confirmed named the group chat Operation: The Maid and the Pianist

 

 

Chapter Text

-Saturday, November 25th, 10:12am---

 

Nagito Komaeda added Hajime Hinata, Sonia Nevermind, Kazuichi Soda, Mikan Tsumiki, Teruteru Hanamura, Fuyuhiko Kuzuryu, Mahiru Koizumi, Akane Owari, Nekomaru Nidai, Chiaki Nanami, Hiyoko Saonji, Ibuki Mioda, Gundham Tanaka and Peko Pekoyama to the group chat.

 

Mikan Tsumiki was kicked from the group chat

 

Nagito Komaeda changed the group name to Goodbye my Fucking Sanity

 

Nagito Komaeda: he

 

Nagito Komaeda: he

 

Nagito Komaeda: H E W W O

 

Mahiru Koizumi: dear lord

 

Hiyoko Saonji: god fucking damn it

 

Hajime Hinata: boi what

 

Fuyuhiko Kuzuryu: what the fuck is this

 

Nagito Komaeda: Harmony Dorm is always using their group chat!!! We have to beat them!!!

 

Chiaki Nanami: …beat them?

 

Nagito Komaeda: yes!!! sooooo

 

Nagito Komaeda: to start, get rid of ur boring names

 

Nagito Komaeda: or ill do it for you

 

Hajime Hinata: is that a threat

 

Ibuki Mioda: ppftt. wats the worst u could do

 

Nagito Komaeda: >:3

 

Nagito Komaeda changed Fuyuhiko Kuzuryu name to $B4by G4nGt3r$

 

Hiyoko Saonji: HOLY SHIT

 

Mahiru Koizumi: YOOOOOOOOOOOOO

 

Ibuki Mioda: EEYYYYYYYYYY

 

Chiaki Nanami: AMAZING

 

Akane Owari: JUST LIKE GOD INTENDED

 

Nekomaru Nidai: my eyes hurt from reading that

 

Gundham Tanaka: an appropriate title, I must say.

 

Kazuichi Soda: JUST GOT BACK

 

Kazuichi Soda: WHAT DID I MISS

 

Mahiru Koizumi: WHAT DID IIII MISSS

 

Ibuki Mioda: HEAD FIRST INTO THE POLITICAL ABYSS

 

Chiaki Nanami: H E A D  F I R S T

 

Mahiru Koizumi: (into the abyss)

 

Ibuki Mioda: EYYYYYYYYYYYY

 

Mahiru Koizumi: EYYYYYYYYY

 

Chiaki Nanami: EYYYYYYYYY

 

Kazuichi Soda: what

 

Nekomaru Nidai: is this some kind of cult chant

 

Hajime Hinata: nagito

 

Hajime Hinata: dude

 

Hajime Hinata: I think you’ve forgotten that fuyuhiko literally has a personal hitman

 

Hajime Hinata: youll be dead in a few minutes

 

Nagito Komaeda: f i n a l l y

 

Mahiru Koizumi: relatable as fuck

 

Peko Pekoyama: what is this?

 

Hiyoko Saonji: there she is

 

Mahiru Koizumi: boss baby ask her to kill nagito

 

Nagito Komaeda: kiss me urself u fuckin pussy

 

$B4by G4nGt3r$: whatever. not even mad

 

Kazuichi Soda: boiiii don’t lie

 

Mahiru Koizumi: oh so that loud crashing wasn’t the sound of you punching the wall?

 

Mikan Tsumiki joined the group

 

Mikan Tsumiki: oh no!! arreee yyour knuckles okkoay? D:

 

Ibuki Mioda: hey Mikan!!

 

Chiaki Nanami: why does it say she joined the group? she should have been added with the rest of us

 

Mikan Tsumiki: when I got on here, it said that id been removed, iii stayed aaway ccause I thought youu hatteedd memmeee :(

 

Mahiru Koizumi: someone kicked her when she got on?

 

Hiyoko Saonji: uh

 

Gundham Tanaka: no surprise here.

 

Mahiru Koizumi: HEY

 

Ibuki Mioda: HIYOKO HOW DARE YOU

 

Hiyoko Saonji: HEY IT WAS A JOKE CALM IT DOWN

 

Kazuichi Soda: UUHH GUYS. I CAN HEAR MIKAN CRYING

 

Ibuki Mioda: OH NO

 

Mahiru Koizumi: MIKAN ITS OKKAYY

 

Nekomaru Nidai: not cool you guys

 

Akane Owari: HEY BLAME HIYOKO

 

Hiyoko Saonji: oh come on!!! it was funny!!!

 

Gundham Tanaka: you are not aware of the suffering you will be put through in just a few moments.

 

Hiyoko Saonji: BOYYIIYYY WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT

 

$B4by G4nGt3r$: …peko just left her room

 

Hiyoko Saonji: she what

 

Chiaki Nanami: RIP HIYOKO YOU ABOUT TO GET MURDERED

 

Kazuichi Soda: SERVES YOU RIGHT

 

Ibuki Mioda: BYYEEEEE

 

Akane Owari: PEKO STICKING UP FOR HER GIRLFRIEND YOU GO GIRL

 

Hajime Hinata: girlfriend??

 

Akane Owari: well they think we don’t know but… we know

 

fuy22: oh wait false alarm she went to comfort mikan

 

Mahiru Koizumi: AAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWWW

 

Akane Owari: AAAAA MY HEART CANT TAKE IT

 

Chiaki Nanami: THAT’S SO CUTE

 

Ibuki Mioda: ITS CANON BITCH

 

Gundham Tanaka: it appears you are safe hiyoko.

 

Hiyoko Saonji: lmao

 

Gundham Tanaka: for now.

 

Nekomaru Nidai: y i k e s

 

Nagito Komaeda: BACK TO CHANGING USERNAMES

 

Nagito Komaeda: GET READY FOR THIS

 

Nagito Komaeda changed Chiaki Nanami’s name to insert video game reference here

 

insert video game reference here: what!! that’s boring as heck

 

Nagito Komaeda: well I did say ‘insert video game reference here’

 

insert video game reference here: hmph

 

insert video game reference here: u are like a little baby watch this

 

insert video game reference here changed their name to what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo

 

Nagito Komaeda: yeah I have no idea what that means

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: >:(

 

Nagito Komaeda: anyways

 

Nagito Komaeda changed Peko Pekoyama’s name to stab me daddy

 

Nagito Komaeda changed Ibuki Mioda’s name to AAAAAAHHHHHHH

 

Nagito Komaeda changed Gundham Tanaka’s name to Hamster Dance: Screamo Edition

 

Nagito Komaeda changed Kazuichi Soda’s name to hey wanna touch my socket wrench

 

Nagito Komaeda changed Akane Owari’s name to I watch gymnastics for the plot

 

stab me daddy: ...I’m sorry, what?

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: APPROPRIATE

 

Hamster Dance: Screamo Edition: I refuse to even dignify this with a response.

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: boi. what

 

i watch gymnastics for the plot: what???

 

Nagito Komaeda: I ran out of ideas

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: gundham o my god

 

$B4by G4nGt3r$: FIRST OF ALL

 

$B4by G4nGt3r$: FUCK YOU NAGITO FOR PUTTING THAT GOD DAMN SONG BACK IN MY HEAD

 

$B4by G4nGt3r$: SECOND OF ALL

 

$B4by G4nGt3r$: W H A T

 

i watch gymnastics for the plot: :I

 

I watch gymnastics for the plot changed their name to check out my big eyes

 

lemme kill myselfie: THAT’S EVEN WORSE

 

Hiyoko Saonji: WOW

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: YEP

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: E Y E S

 

Nagito Komaeda: ill allow it

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: yaint the boss of this chat

 

$B4by G4nGt3r$: say yaint again and I swear to fuck

 

Nagito Komaeda: sooo uhh

 

Nagito Komaeda changed Mahiru Koizumi’s name to lemme take a selfie

 

$B4by G4nGt3r$: NO

 

Hiyoko Saonji: FUCKING BURN IT

 

$B4by G4nGt3r$: GOD DAMN IT

 

check out my big eyes: WHOS PLAYING THAT SONG

 

Nekomaru Nidai: IBUKI TURN THAT MUSIC OFF

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: >:3

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: ibuki

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: >:33

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: don’t you dare

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: >:333

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: When Jason was at the table
I kept on seeing him look at me when he was with that other girl
Do you think he was just doing that to make me jealous?
Because he was totally texting me all night last night
And I don't know if it's a booty call or not
So, like what do you think?
Did you think that girl was pretty?
How did that girl even get in here?
Did you see her?
She's so short and that dress is so tacky
Who wears cheetah?
It's not even summer, why does the DJ keep on playing Summertime Sadness?
After we go to the bathroom, can we go smoke a cigarette?
I really need one
But first,
Let me take a selfie

Can you guys help me pick a filter?
I don't know if I should go with XX Pro or Valencia
I wanna look tan
What should my caption be?
I want it to be clever
How about "Livin' with my bitches, Hashtag live"
I only got 10 likes in the last 5 minutes
Do you think I should take it down?
Let me take another selfie

Wait, pause, Jason just liked my selfie
What a creep
Is that guy sleeping over there?
Yeah, the one next to the girl with no shoes on
That's so ratchet
That girl is such a fake model
She definitely bought all her Instagram followers
Who goes out on Mondays?
Ok, let's go take some shots
Oh no, I feel like I'm gonna throw up
Oh wait, never mind I'm fine
Let's go dance
There's no vodka at this table
Do you know anyone else here?
Oh my god, Jason just texted me
Should I go home with him?
I guess I took a good selfie

Let me take a selfie

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: OH COME ON

 

check out my big eyes: KILL IT

 

$B4by G4nGt3r$: FUCKING HELL

 

Hiyoko Saonji: IBUKI IM GONNA KILL YOU

 

Nekomaru Nidai: TURN THE MUSIC O F F

 

lemme take a selfie changed their name to lemme kill myselfie

 

lemme kill myselfie: much better

 

Hiyoko Saonji: mood

 

check out my big eyes: I relate

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: me as fuck

 

Nagito Komaeda: same

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: eyyyyyyyyYYY

 

Hajime Hinata: guys could you lighten up a little?

 

$B4by G4nGt3r$: we cant all be neurotypical, karen

 

Nagito Komaeda: anyway uhhhh

 

Nagito Komaeda changed Hiyoko Saonji’s name to minion goblin

 

minion goblin: hey hey

 

minion goblin: do you wanna die

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: hey u stole maki’s catchphrase!!!

 

lemme kill myselfie: why a minion??

 

check out my big eyes: dude

 

check out my big eyes: haven’t u heart abt the minion thing from harmony’s chat??

 

Nagito Komaeda: what thing

 

check out my big eyes: cock ichi initiated a game of google searches where u had to guess who searched what

 

check out my big eyes: angie’s one was “minion porn”

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: HGFDERTUIJHGFDERTYUJHGD

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: HOLY WOWW

 

$B4by G4nGt3r$: UHHH

 

Nekomaru Nidai: w.hy^??

 

check out my big eyes: hifumi commissioned a piece of a naked minion statue

 

$B4by G4nGt3r$: W H AT THE FUCCKK

 

check out my big eyes: it made korekiyo so FUCIKING pissed

 

check out my big eyes: he yelled at hifumi in the MIDDLE OF CLASS

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

 

check out my big eyes: AND HE DESTRYED THE FUCKINGG STATUE

 

$B4by G4nGt3r$: HOLY SHIT

 

lemme kill myselfie: WHY A MINION????

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: AMAZZAIGGNG

 

Teruteru Hanamura: naked minion?

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: oh sheet

 

Nekomaru Nidai: hes been summoned

 

lemme kill myselfie: NAGITO ANSWER MY FUCKING QUESTION

 

lemme kill myselfie: WHY A MINION

Nagito Komaeda: welcome teruteru!!

 

Nagito Komaeda: also uhh

 

Nagito Komaeda: her hair looks like a banana

 

Nagito Komaeda: u know who likes bananas??

 

Nagito Komaeda: m I n I o n s

 

Nagito Komaeda: also shes short. n annoying

 

minion goblin: HEY

 

Nagito Komaeda: ALSO EVERYONE THINKS SHES ANNOYING BUT SHES STILL HERE

 

lemme kill myselfie: BOYYYYYYIYYYYYY

 

minion goblin: PEKO PLZ KILL HIM 4 ME

 

stab me daddy: I have yet to forgive you for making mikan cry.

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHH

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: HFJGHGSHDRRJKKNKVESAOP

 

$B4by G4nGt3r$: THAT’S FAIR

 

minion goblin: IM BEING BULLIED

 

minion goblin: I CNT BELIEVE YALL

 

Nagito Komaeda: anywhooooo

 

Nagito Komaeda: get ready for this

 

Nagito Komaeda changed Teruteru Hanamura’s name to sausage italiano

 

sausage italiano: ~very gud~

 

lemme kill myselfie: fucking stop

 

Sonia Nevermind: hello everyone!

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: nagito

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: im watching you

 

check out my big eyes: IF YOU EVEN TRY ANYTHING

 

Nagito Komaeda changed Sonia Nevermind’s name to smol pure princess very kawaii~

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: UGHHHHHH

 

$B4by G4nGt3r$: AWFUL

 

Nekomaru Nidai: WAT THE SHIT

 

smol pure princess very kawaii~: hey nagito!

 

Sonia Nevermind changed their name to this is how we do things in my country

 

this is how we do things in my country: go fuck yourself

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: OH MY GOD

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: YOU ARE INCREDIBLEEE

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: THAT WAS EXILERATING

 

Hamster Dance: Screamo Edition: ah yes, the dark witch continues to learn the way of a true warrior.

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: ^^what the fucc does that mean

 

this is how we do things in my country: thank you, gundham!

 

$B4by G4nGt3r$: u sound kinda salty kazuichi

 

$B4by G4nGt3r$: could it be

 

$B4by G4nGt3r$: you are

 

minion goblin: craving my mgnuggies

 

check out my big eyes: what the fuck

 

$B4by G4nGt3r$: …jealous??

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: of what??

 

$B4by G4nGt3r$: Sonia and gundham’s relationship >:)

 

check out my big eyes: :OOO

 

Nekomaru Nidai: well no SHIT

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: THEY HAVE NO RELATIONSHIP

 

Hamster Dance: Screamo Edition: he is correct.

 

minion goblin: BOIIII DON’T LIE

 

-

 

Conversation between gay gamer and gay princess

 

gay princess: wow

 

gay gamer: they are dumb

 

gay gamer: SO!!! CLUELESS!!!

 

gay princess: I mean,,, only mahiru, peko, mikan and ibuki know

 

gay gamer: yeah

 

gay gamer: ur too in love with me to be with gundham <33

 

gay princess: yep <333

 

gay gamer: I love u :DD

 

gay princess: Me too :333

 

-

 

Nagito Komaeda: anyways!!!

 

Nagito Komaeda changed Nekomaru Nidai’s name to eat shit and die

 

eat shit and die: I mean,,, I guess

 

Nagito Komaeda changed Mikan Tsumiki’s name to literally crying

 

literally crying: fffittininng D::

 

Nagito Komaeda: and finally,,,,

 

Nagito Komaeda changed Hajime Hinata’s name to choke on my ahoge

 

choke on my ahoge: …babe

 

$B4by G4nGt3r$: what the FUCK

 

check out my big eyes: y’all need jesus

 

eat shit and die: agreed.

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: wow! terrible

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: I would put a lenny face here but im too lazy to copy paste

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: relatable

 

Nagito Komaeda: so all of the usernames are changed!! perfect

 

choke on my ahoge: are they now?

 

Nagito Komaeda: yep!!

 

choke on my ahoge: :I

 

choke on my ahoge: liar

 

choke on my ahoge changed Nagito Komaeda’s name to hopexual trash bag

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: EYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

 

hopesexual trash bag: HAJIME HOW DARE YOU

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: someone isn’t getting laid tonight~

 

Hamster Dance: Screamo Edition: a befitting title.

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: WELL DONE

 

eat shit and die: SPECTACULAR

 

$B4by G4nGt3r$: what the fuck! its amazing

 

this is how we do things in my country: most spectacular!

 

sausage italiano: did someone say sexual?~

 

minion goblin: THAT’S PAYBACK MOTHERFUCKER

 

lemme kill myselfie: YEEEEEEAAAAA

 

check out my big eyes: ACCURATE

 

hopesexual trash bag: HEY IM BEING BULLIED

 

hopesexual trash bag: GUYSS

 

stab me daddy: anyways, I believe I must go.

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: yep! same here

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: me too

 

this is how we do things in my country: I should get going as well

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: where are you all going?

 

lemme kill myselfie: none of ur business degenerate

 

sausage italiano: stealing tenko’s lines now, are we?

 

literally crying: hguhiiiuiiii mmuusttt goo gooooo aassweelll :(((

 

choke on my ahoge: what the heck are they doing?

 

Hamster Dance: Screamo Edition: it is of no concern to us.

 

hopesexual trash bag: kinda suspicious tho, riiight?

 

minion goblin: I hope they plan ur death fuckwad

 

-

 

---Operation: Maid and the Pianist---

---Sunday, November 26th, 7:09pm---

 

Marie Antoinette: sooo…. any news?

 

this is how we do things in my country: SORRY FOR BEING LATE

 

my suspicions are confirmed: no problem, we have just begun.

 

stab me daddy: has something happened between those two?

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: YEEEPP

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: SOURCES FROM INSIDE THE HARMONY DORM HAVE SAID THAT KAEDE AND KIRUMI WERE GONE ALL DAY YESTERDAY AND THAT NO ONE HAD SEEN THEM

 

my suspicions are confirmed: however, I can confirm that they were out in town all day together, most likely doing early Christmas shopping.

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: AWWW

 

Ultimate Little Sister: so uhhh… what now??

 

Marie Antoinette: I suggest we talk to them both to see how it went.

 

literally crying: yyyeeepp

 

this is how we do things in my country: I feel kinda bad…

 

this is how we do things in my country: it feels like we are meddling in their private affairs…

 

k a w a i i: I know kaede has a MAJOR crush on kirumi!! she talks about her nonstop

 

stab me daddy: and kirumi has stated that she also has a crush on kaede, but believes she is in a relationship with shuichi

 

stab me daddy: she is too afraid to make a move

 

my suspicions are confirmed: it would be nice to see our friends happy, agreed?

 

this is how we do things in my country: that’s true!!! its obvious they like each other

 

Marie Antoinette: well then, tomorrow we will meet with them separately to talk with them.

 

my suspicions are confirmed: agreed.

 

-

 

Kaede closed the door to her room with a thud, and immediately lost all tension in her body.

She threw herself onto her bed, hands clamped over her eyes. She felt like yelling.

After experiencing the greatest day of her life yesterday, how could she not want to scream?

An entire day shopping with her crush, the two just having a great time together? Incredible.

Kirumi was so calm, yet so friendly, yet so serious, yet so funny, yet so smart, yet so-

Kaede’s mind raced on and on as she thought about the pretty maid. Soon, she felt her body grow tired as she began to melt into her covers, sleep overtaking her.

Just then, she heard a bing and noticed something light up at the edge of her vision. Reaching her arm toward the light, she grabbed the object, her phone, and checked the screen, which delayed the drowsiness for a moment or two.

It was a text message from her girl friend’s group chat- a message from Komaru Naegi.

Just before exhaustion won her over, Kaede managed to read the message.

 

-

---Music Nerds Band Together---

---Sunday, November 26th, 11:06pm---

 

Ultimate Little Sister: Hey girl, meet us in the music room after school tomorrow. We gotta discuss your day out with kirumi ;)

 

-

Chapter Text

---Thursday, December 21st, 3:33am---

 

how to top when you are 5ft tall: hhey

 

how to top when you are 5ft tall: if a human eats a nother human

 

how to top when you are 5ft tall: with ccnconsent

 

how to top when you are 5ft tall: is it still cannibalism

 

shinGUCCI: kokichi

 

shinGUCCI: it is

 

shinGUCCI: 3 AM

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: hes right tho

 

shirogaNYA: NO HE DOESN’T

 

shirogaNYA: I MEAN NO HES NOT

 

peel the avocado: OUMA WHAT THE FUCK

 

shylock homos: of course its still cannibalism

 

how to top when you are 5ft tall: nnno itss not

 

delete your account: what is it then?

 

how to top when you are 5ft tall: vore

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: JHDERTUJFDSERGFDSEIJ

 

Hermione GAYnger: SCREW YOU

 

catch these lesbian hands: wow! what the fuck

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: MOTHER FUCKER

 

how to top when you are 5ft tall: im not a motherfuckerr

 

how to top when you are 5ft tall: thhheres only 1 motherrfcucker here

 

catch these lesbian hands: WHO?

 

how to top when you are 5ft tall: kkaede

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: oh my god

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: WHAT

 

shirogaNYA: KIRUMATSU CONFIRMED

 

ultimatePENIS: whats going on?? im fuking tired

 

shylock homos: nothing!!!

 

peel the avocado: guys stop

 

how to top when you are 5ft tall: ayway oooyuuuhhh im tiired but since im basically durnk im gonna change some usernnames

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: don’t

 

god is dead and we killed him: shuichi put ur bfriend under control!!

 

shylock homos: what the hell am I supposed to do???

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: SUCH LANGUAGE

 

how to top when you are 5ft tall: y’all rready for this

 

how to top when you are 5ft tall changed their name to ouma wa mou shindeiru

 

shirogaNYA: AWW NO FAIR

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: WHAT HHPAAPPENED TO HIS PNUSIHMENT

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: a username like that is punishment enough.

 

Hermione GAYnger: ryoma why are tttyppingi so nnormmlally?? arrent yyuu tired??

 

say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole: I am in a constant state of fatigue. nothing fazes me anymore. ive pushed past that and now dwell above. my soul has projected to the astral plane, where it shall remain till the end of my days and beyond my death.

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: fucking relate

 

shinGUCCI: same

shylock homos: same

 

shirogaNYA: same

 

delete your account: same

 

peel the avocado: same

 

ultimatePENIS: same

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: same

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: oh btw rryoma

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru changed say_goodbye_to_your_kneecaps_asshole’s name to holy fuck it’s sans undertale

 

holy fuck it’s sans undertale: im gonna fucking kill you

 

peel the avocado: oh yeah btw in my dreams with the bear thing ryoma got turned to a skeleton

 

shirogaNYA: steven after nnot surviving

 

delete your account: shut the fuck up shirogane

 

mothergoose: whats going on?

 

shinGUCCI: oh shit

 

Hermione GAYnger: its mother!!!

 

mothergoose: go to bed, all of you. we have work to do to prepare the Christmas party.

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: yyyepepepeep

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: iilll ckeep cchanghing uusernameessse tommoroow ;)))             

 

 

 

---Thursday, December 21st, 10:23am---

 

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: heyyy!!

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: FUCK

 

delete your account: dear lord

 

god is dead and we killed him: go away!!

 

catch these lesbian hands: UUUGGHHHH

 

Hermione GAYnger: boii!!!

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: wow. really feeling the love

 

shylock homos: babe come over

 

shylock homos: I think im sick

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: :OO

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: IM ON MY WAY IM BRINGING BLANKETS

 

mothergoose: shall I bring hot chocolate?

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: yes mom!!!

 

holy fuck it’s sans undertale: this is so pure oh my gosh

 

shinGUCCI: sorry for yelling at you kokichi

 

Hermione GAYnger: goals

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: okay!! now

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: LETS CONTINUE

 

shinGUCCI: OH GOD DAMMIT

 

Hermione GAYnger: nevermind! go fuck yourself!

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: it was fun while it lasted

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx: fuck u im changing my own username

 

xxxTIDDIESxxx changed their name to agar.io is basically just a vore orgy

 

delete your account: I am going to fucking ASSASSINATE YOU

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: EYYYY

 

holy fuck it’s sans undertale: WHAT THE FUCK

 

shinGUCCI: …shes not wrong

 

Hermione GAYnger: SHUT THE FUCK UP SHINGUCCI

 

catch these lesbian hands: MIU I SWEAR TO FUCK

 

peel the avocado: JKHHJNHFYESRAEWJIOMKLMLRDA

 

shylock homos: I just got 10 times sicker

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: a n y w a y

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru changed delete your account’s name to ass ass in

 

ass ass in: any uhhh get ready to die

 

buzz lightyear, first man on the moon: kill him babe!! I believe in u

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru changed buzz lightyear, first man on the moon’s name to whaddup im jared im 19 and I never fucking learned how to read

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: WHAT

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: IDK!!! YOU JUST REMIND ME OF HIM!!

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: I cant read suddenly, I don’t know

 

shinGUCCI: yeah jared

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru changed ultimatePENIS’s name to mmotherfuckerr

 

mmotherfuckerr: wwhat

 

mmotherfuckerr: why??

 

peel the avocado: …she doesn’t remember

 

mmotherfuckerr: WHAT??

 

shylock homos changed mmotherfuckerr’s name to sing me a song ur the piano gay

 

shylock homos: I saved you

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: good!!!

 

catch these lesbian hands: mlm/wlw solidarity

 

sing me a song ur the piano gay: im confused

 

shirogaNYA: …kirumatsu

 

sing me a song ur the piano gay: ?????

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: anywwwaayyyy

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru changed peel the avocado’s name to the grinch is gay and so am i

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: Christmas spirit!!!

 

the grinch is gay and so am i: I FUCKING LOVE IT

 

shinGUCCI: is everyone in this chat gay??

 

sing me a song ur the piano gay: yes

 

the grinch is gay and so am i: yes

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: yes

 

mothergoose: correct.

 

Hermione GAYnger: yes

 

catch these lesbian hands: yes

 

god is dead and we killed him: yes

 

shylock homos: yes

 

ass ass in: im bi

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: same

 

agar.io is basically ust a vore orgy: IM PAN

 

shirogaNYA: me too!!

 

holy fuck it’s sans undertale: im ace

 

they-followin-me-ma: gonta loves everyone!!

 

shinGUCCI: wow

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: fellas is it gay

 

shylock homos: yes

 

the grinch is gay and so am i: good

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: MOOD

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru changed Hermione GAYnger’s name to nyahhh :3

 

nyahhh :3: what

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: fucking weeb

 

shirogaNYA: kokichi is secretly a closet weeb

 

shylock homos: considering the amount of time he spent in the closet I would be surprised

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: OH MY GOD

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: WOW

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru changed mothergoose’s name to ppianofuckerr

 

shylock homos changed ppianofuckerr’s name to mothergoose

 

shylock homos: begone.

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: boi!!!

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: im tryna be a wingman here

 

ass ass in: whats going on???

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: so

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru changed mothergoose’s name to sorry mommy ive been bad

 

god is dead and we killed him: god left

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: god JOINED

 

catch these lesbian hands: im gonna FUCKING MURDER YOU

 

ass ass in: KOKICHI YOU BITCH

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: NOOOOOO

 

agar.io is basically ust a vore orgy: JUST CHANGE THE MOMMY TO DADDY

 

shinGUCCI: DO NOT

 

holy fuck it’s sans undertale: man who thought he lost all hope loses last bit of hope he didn’t know he had

 

nyahhh :3: I HATE YOU

 

sing me a song ur the piano gay: WHAT ARE YOU DOING

 

the grinch is gay and so am i: HJDYWWUIOJKLNKESRW

 

shinGUCCI: RANTARO STOP FUCKING KEYBOARD SMASHING

 

the grinch is gay and so am i: THAT WAS MY HEAD HITTING THE PHONE

 

the grinch is gay and so am i: IM FUCKING DONE WITH YOU KOICHI

 

sing me a song ur the piano gay changed sorry mommy ive been bad’s name to mother hates you all

 

mother hates you all: thank you kaede.

 

sing me a song ur the piano gay: you’re welcome!

 

shirogaNYA: :o

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: gay

 

the grinch is gay and so am i: SKLDJSKJDKDJKJDKEISKDJAKD

ouma wa mou shindeiru: also!! nice name,, butt lemme tweak it

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru changed mother hates you all’s name to mother hates everyone but kaede

 

shirogaNYA: APPROPRIATE

 

shinGUCCI: …better I guess

 

sing me a song ur the piano gay: kokichi what

 

mother hates everyone but kaede: he’s not wrong

 

shylock homos: WHAT

 

the grinch is gay and so am i: OOOOOOOOOHH

 

the grinch is gay and so am i: KAEDE IS IN THE SAME ROOM AS ME SHE IS BLUSHING

 

shirogaNYA: HO LY F  U  C  K

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: ahem

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: we interrupt gay to bring youu

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru changed god is dead and we killed him’s name to yaint goin tuh heaven

 

the grinch is gay and so am i: Y A I N T

 

ass ass in: FUCKER

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: I imagine that what it would sound like if goofy said that

 

holy fuck it’s sans undertale: fuck you

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: WHY

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: I mean its still true

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep2: im having flashbacks to when shingucci yelled at hifumi in class

 

agar.io is basically ust a vore orgy: YOU MEAN

 

shinGUCCI: MIU

 

agar.io is basically ust a vore orgy: BECAUSE OF

 

shinGUCCI: STOP RIGHT NOW

 

agar.io is basically ust a vore orgy: THE MINION STATUE?

 

shinGUCCI: IM GONNA FF U C KINH KILL YOU

 

the grinch is gay and so am i: its funny cuz in my dreams miu died

 

agar.io is basically ust a vore orgy: WHAT

 

the grinch is gay and so am i: gonta killed her

 

ass ass in: LIAR

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: FUCKING LIAR

 

holy fuck it’s sans undertale: I want gonta to kill me

 

the grinch is gay and so am i: actually ryoma

 

the grinch is gay and so am i: kirumi killed you

 

holy fuck it’s sans undertale: what

 

catch these lesbian hands: wow I love a woman who can fucking kill me

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru changed catch these lesbian hands’s name to i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: stronk??

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: stronk.

 

shirogaNYA: tenko stop hitting on kaedes girlfriend!!

 

sing me a song ur the piano gay: shes not my girlfriend!!

 

ass ass in: …yet

 

sing me a song ur the piano gay: boii

 

sing me a song ur the piano gay changed their name to im taking a break, nothing personal

 

im taking a break, nothing personal has deleted themselves from The REAL Disaster of the Ultimate Academy

 

ass ass in: just leave it tsumugi

 

shirogaNYA: I feel really bad now…

 

shirogaNYA: im gonna go apologize after this!!

 

nyahhh :3: wait a min rantaro

 

nyahhh :3: how did gonta kill miu??

 

agar.io is basically ust a vore orgy: choked me with his BIG, HARD

 

ass ass in: finish that sentence and you die, bitch

 

agar.io is basically ust a vore orgy: arms

 

ass ass in: …you live another day

 

the grinch is gay and so am i: he did choke her but not with his “arms”

 

the grinch is gay and so am i: choked her with toilet paper

 

nyahhh :3: fitting

 

agar.io is basically ust a vore orgy: ???

 

nyahhh :3: YEAH CUZ SHES SUCH  PIECE OF SHIT

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH

 

agar.io is basically ust a vore orgy: FUCK YOU MIDGET

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: YOU WANNA FUCKING FIGHT

 

agar.io is basically ust a vore orgy: MEET ME IN THE DENNYS PARKING LOT AT 3AM BITCH

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: ILL WHIPE THE FLOOR WITH YOU LIKE GONTA WHIPED YOU WITH THAT TOILET PAPER

 

nyahhh :3: CUZ SHE IT SHIT

 

www.do-robots-have-dick.com: everyone, you are making her cry.

 

holy fuck it’s sans undertale: that’s what those noises are?? sounds more like moaning

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: it is

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: probably

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: :o

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: keebs stopped being a cryptid for one second!!

 

www.do-robots-have-dick.com: ive decided to join you.

 

the grinch is gay and so am i: we were just talking about how gonta killed miu in my dreams

 

shylock homos: yeah right ranty :I

 

shylock homos: u really are the weed man

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: we can talk about his fucked up dreams later

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: theres something I need to do

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru changed shylock homos’s name to NANI?!

 

NANI?!: WHY

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: boyfriends with matching names!!

 

NANI?!: thanks! it heccing succs

 

agar.io is basically ust a vore orgy: oh my god

 

www.do-robots-have-dick.com: ive made a mistake in joining you.

 

holy fuck it’s sans undertale: you and me both buddy

 

NANI?! changed their name to shylock homos

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: aww

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: ur boring :II

 

shylock homos: ur literally right next to me

 

shylock homos: I could make u sick right now

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: how??

 

shirogaNYA: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

shinGUCCI: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

ass ass in: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

the grinch is gay and so am i: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

nyahhh :3: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

holy fuck it’s sans undertale: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: oooohhh

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: I see

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: well then

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: I wouldn’t mind~~~ ;))

 

shylock homos: that’s not what I meant

 

www.do-robots-have-dick.com: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

shylock homos: oh my god

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: I think we’re almost done with usernames!!

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: however shu

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: ur name is boring so I still need to change it

 

shylock homos: f I n e

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru changed shylock homos’s name to im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: WHAT

 

agar.io is basically ust a vore orgy: FUCKING HELL

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: OH MY GOD

 

ass ass in: FUCK

 

shinGUCCI: THIS IS GETTING OUT OF HAND

 

shirogaNYA: SHES GONNA KIL YOU KOKICHI

 

shirogaNYA: DON’T YOU KNOW HOW MUCH KIRIGIRI CARES ABOUT SHUICHI??

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: she wont find out shh

 

shinGUCCI: …kokichi

 

shinGUCCI: kirumi is very close friends with her

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: fuck

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: before I die tho

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru changed they-followin-me-ma’s name to i stuck my dick in an anthill once

 

www.do-robots-have-dick.com: ?????

 

ass ass in: now we’re all going to kill you

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: oh my god

 

i stuck my dick in an anthill once: it true D:

 

holy fuck it’s sans undertale: WHAT

 

the grinch is gay and so am i: W H A T

 

shinGUCCI: WHAT THE  F U C  KKK

 

nyahhh :3: BOIIII???????????

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: EXCUSE ME?????????

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: GONTA STOPS BEING A CRYPTID FOR ONE SECOND O CONFESS ON HAVING PUT HIS DICK IN ANTHILL?????

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: WHAT

 

the grinch is gay and so am i: IS THIS REAL LIFE

 

ass ass in: im going to murder you

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: this is like deja vue

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: remember when this chat was made n maki almost killed kokichi??

 

shirogaNYA: good times

 

shylock homos: wish we could turn back time. to the good old days

 

agar.io is basically ust a vore orgy: SHYHARA STOP BEING EMO

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: SHUICHI HO DARE YOU

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: EVERYONE WATS TO KILL ME BUT WAIT

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru changed shirogaNYA’s name to naruto is my senpai

 

naruto is my senpai: bitch

 

shinGUCCI: you’ve been watching way to much anime kokichi

 

naruto is my senpai: well its accurate

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: w h a t

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: and finally,,,

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru changed www.do-robots-have-dicks.com’s name to instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster

 

instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster: no surprise here.

 

nyahhh :3: what about kiyo???

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: oh right

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: I kinda like his username,,,

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: you changed our names, change his

 

shinGUCCI: please don’t

 

ass ass in: you can redeem yourself here kokichi.

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: hmmm

 

shinGUCCI: spare me

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru changed shinGUCCI’s name to minion daddy

 

ass ass in: nope

 

ass ass in: prepare to die motherfucker

 

minion daddy: im joining you guys

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: SHU HELP ME

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: I cant

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: im sick

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: BABE

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: THEY’RE GONNA CRUSH ME

 

the grinch is gay and so am i: that’s ironic

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: ?????

 

the grinch is gay and so am i: …never mind

Chapter Text

---Thursday, December 28th, 3:56pm---

 

hopesexual trash bag changed 14 names

 

hopesexual trash bag: hey dudes

 

Has furry porn in their camera roll: what the fuck do you want

 

Has furry porn in their camera roll: WAIT

 

Also hits on Kirumi: WAIT A MINUTE

 

Really likes the movie boss baby: THE FUCKKKK

 

hopesexual trash bag: ;)))

 

Styles his ahoge every morning: ??????????

 

Is hella gay for mikan: what?

 

Fell of the stage during a show: NAGITO WHAT THE FUCK

 

Kissed Mahiru once: UHHHHHHHHHHHH

 

Is dating Chiaki: what has happened to our usernames?

 

Caught reading Bowser x reader yaoi: BOIIIII

 

Broke their leg pretending to strip dance: WHATTTT

 

Broke a POLE pretending to strip dance: SCUSE ME

 

hopesexual trash bag: as I was saying, hello!!

 

hopesexual trash bag: you may have noticed your names are different!! cause we playing a game!!

 

hopesexual trash bag: the harmony dorm also played a game but we’re doing it better!!!

 

hopesexual trash bag: all ur names have been changed to something you did, or something about you. you gotta guess who is who :))

 

Had a crush on Hajime once: NO

 

Broke their leg pretending to strip dance: somebody kissed Mahiru???

 

Styles his ahoge every morning: SOMEBODY IS DATING CHIAKI???

 

Cried over a dead fly: what is happening!!

 

Caught reading Bowser x reader yaoi: I already have a guess that cried over a dead fly is mikan

 

Caught reading Bowser x reader yaoi: unless gonta has been hiding in this chat

 

hopesexual trash bag: that was easyyy

 

hopesexual trash bag changed Cried over a dead fly’s name to literally crying

 

literally crying: well done! it was pretty easy though

 

Really likes the movie boss baby: hey uh

 

Really likes the movie boss baby: what the FUCK happened to mikan???

 

Caught reading Bowser x reader yaoi: I think kazuichi and miu teamed up to make her a device that would let her type without the trembling

 

literally crying: Yes! I can type clearly now! :D

 

Also hits on Kirumi: you’re welcome by the way :D

 

Also hits on Kirumi: wait

 

Also hits on Kirumi: FUC K

 

Broke a POLE pretending to strip dance: EYYYYYYY

 

Broke their leg pretending to strip dance: HE WAS EXPOSED

 

Really likes the movie boss baby: NAH HE EXPOSED HIMSELF

 

Constantly hits on Kirumi: KAZUICHI HOW DAREE

 

Kissed Mahiru once: I mean. it was already really obvious before

 

Has furry porn in their camera roll: too bad kirumi completely uninterested in both of you lmao

 

Styles his ahoge every morning: kirumi has both kazuichi and teruteru flirting with her?? someone help her

 

Constantly hits on Kirumi: howd you know it was me??

 

Fell of the stage during a show: because its YOU

 

hopesexual trash bag changed Constantly hits on Kirumi’s name to sausage italiano

 

hopesexual trash bag changed Also hits on Kirumi’s name to hey wanna touch my socket wrench

 

hopesexual trash bag: that’s 3 down!!!

 

Caught reading Bowser x reader yaoi: hey hajime

 

Styles his ahoge every morning: yeah

 

Styles his ahoge every morning: OH GOD DAMMIT

 

Fell of the stage during a show: JHGDSERTYUKSWEUINBVCSW

 

Kissed Mahiru once: WOW THAT WAS EASYYY

 

Broke their leg pretending to strip dance: I KNEW IT WASN’T NATURAL

 

Has furry porn in their camera roll: oh come on ur the only one here who has an ahoge

 

Styles his ahoge every morning: that’s not true!!! what about akane!!!

 

Really likes the movie boss baby: does it LOOK like akane even WASHes her fucking hair

 

Styles his ahoge every morning: …ur right

 

Styles his ahoge every morning: but hey

 

Styles his ahoge every morning: whatever

 

Styles his ahoge every morning: go back to reading ur bowser x reader yaoi chiaki

 

Broke a POLE pretending to strip dance: ??????

 

Has furry porn in their camera roll: W H AT

 

Caught reading Bowser x reader yaoi: FUCK YOU HAJIME

 

Really likes the movie boss baby: WAIT CHIAKI IS THAT YOU

 

Caught reading Bowser x reader yaoi: UH

 

Broke their leg pretending to strip dance: FUCKING EXPOSED

 

Kissed Mahiru once: OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHH

 

hopesexual trash bag changed Styles his ahoge every morning’s name to choke on my ahoge

 

hopesexual trash bag changed Caught reading Bowser x reader yaoi’s name to what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo

 

Is hella gay for mikan: how did you know it was chiaki?

 

choke on my ahoge: first of all, chiaki has a major crush on bowser

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: THAT’S NOT TRUEEEEE

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: don’t we all

 

Broke a POLE pretending to strip dance: what the f u ck

 

choke on my ahoge: SECOND

 

choke on my ahoge: im the one who caught her reading it

 

sausage italiano: OI

 

Broke their leg pretending to strip dance: ???? THE FUCK

 

Really likes the movie boss baby: OLE NAIRES

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: ur dead to me

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: I was reading it ironically!!!!

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: whatever. it was really ooc anyway

 

Kissed Mahiru once: JGFDSEDSERUINBVSERTYUIK

 

Has furry porn in their camera roll: anyway uhhh

 

Has furry porn in their camera roll: expose urself fuyuhiko, u boss baby loving fuck

 

Fell of the stage during a show: you think that’s fuyuhiko??

 

Has furry porn in their camera roll: obviously

 

Really likes the movie boss baby: what the fuck??? why would you assume its me???

 

Kissed Mahiru once: OOOOOOOHHHHH

 

Really likes the movie boss baby: FU CK

 

Has furry porn in their camera roll: I WAS RIGHT

 

Broke their leg pretending to strip dance: WELL DOOOONE

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: HOLD UP

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: IS THAT WHY THERE A BOSS BABY DVD IN THE LIVING ROOM??

 

Kissed Mahiru once: THERES A WHA T

 

Fell of the stage during a show: a dvd??? goddamn

 

Broke their leg pretending to strip dance: fuyuhiko: watches boss baby

 

Broke their leg pretending to strip dance: fuyuhiko, looking at himself in the mirror: “wow. life imitates art”

 

choke on my ahoge: OH MY GOD

 

Kissed Mahiru once: !!!!!!!

 

Fell of the stage during a show: holy shit!!! he looks EXACTLY like the boss baby!!!!

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: you think?

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: more like a boss baby kin’s edgy deviantart oc

 

Broke a POLE pretending to strip dance: …hholy shit

 

Kissed Mahiru once: OH MY FUCKING GOD

 

hopesexual trash bag: CHIAKI UR A GENIUS

 

hopesexual trash bag changed Really likes the movie boss baby’s name to boss baby kin’s edgy deviantart oc

 

Fell of the stage during a show: ur both gonna die

 

Fell of the stage during a show: peko’s gonna kill you both

 

Broke a POLE pretending to strip dance: I feel like this has happened before

 

boss baby kin’s edgy deviantart oc: ugh

 

Broke their leg pretending to strip dance: that’s all you have to say???

 

sausage italiano: if you punched another hole into the wall I swear to FUCK

 

Kissed Mahiru once: I thought another hole would excite you???

 

sausage italiano: actually. ur right

 

Has furry porn in their camera roll: wow

 

Fell of the stage during a show: peko!!! where are you!!!

 

choke on my ahoge: I don’t think shes gonna reveal herself

 

Kissed Mahiru once: well I already know what her name was changed too

 

Has furry porn in their camera roll: its really obvious

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: mhm

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: should we say it??

 

Broke their leg pretending to strip dance: OH I GET IT

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: ??? get what???

 

Has furry porn in their camera roll: peko is totally gay for mikan

 

Broke a POLE pretending to strip dance: of course

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: WHAT???

 

boss baby kin’s edgy deviantart oc: ??????

 

Kissed Mahiru once: how did you not know???

 

Kissed Mahiru once: fuyuhiko shes practically ur sis

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: fuyuhiko’s gaydar is obviously broken

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: he cant even notice how hard kazuichi is crushing on him

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: ??????? UH

 

boss baby kin’s edgy deviantart oc: WHAT?????

 

hopesexual trash bag: were getting sidetracked

 

boss baby kin’s edgy deviantart oc: I need a fucking break

 

Broke a POLE pretending to strip dance: did they both just go offline???

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: ive seen enough anime to know where this is going

 

Kissed Mahiru once: HEY UH

 

Kissed Mahiru once: PEKOOOOO

 

Is hella gay for mikan: yes?

 

Broke their leg pretending to strip dance: confirmed!!!

 

choke on my ahoge: …anddd she just went offline

 

Kissed Mahiru once: SO DID MIKANNNN

 

hopesexual trash bag changed Is hella gay for Mikan’s name to stab me daddy

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: those were the easiest ones to guess

 

Kissed Mahiru once: now what??

 

sausage italiano: we’re down 4 people

 

sausage italiano: but there are a few usernames that have not appeared yet!!!

 

Kissed Mahiru once: whos the stripper pole duo??

 

choke on my ahoge: i. never thought I would ever hear those words

 

Has furry porn in their camera roll: cough cough

 

Has furry porn in their camera roll: akane broke her leg and nekomaru broke the pole

 

Broke their leg pretending to strip dance: WHAT

 

Broke a POLE pretending to strip dance: WHAT

 

Has furry porn in their camera roll: I WAS THERE

 

Has furry porn in their camera roll: I DARED YOU TO DO IT

 

Fell of the stage during a show: HGFDSEYUJGDSERYUIKS

 

choke on my ahoge: UM

 

hopesexual trash bag: EXCELLENT

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: NOT SURPRISED

 

Kissed Mahiru once: AHAHAHAHHHAHHAHAHAHHAH

 

Broke their leg pretending to strip dance: ur the one who dared us??

 

Broke a POLE pretending to strip dance: wait so

 

Broke their leg pretending to strip dance: …mahiru?

 

Has furry porn in their camera roll: uh

 

Has furry porn in their camera roll: FUCKING

 

Fell of the stage during a show: WAIT

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: f urrY Porn????????

 

choke on my ahoge: WHAT THE FUCK

 

Has furry porn in their camera roll: IT WASN’T MY FAULT

 

Has furry porn in their camera roll: SATO PUT THEM IN MY CAMERA ROLL AS A JOKE

 

Fell of the stage during a show: is that why you didn’t let me look in ur camera roll?

 

Has furry porn in their camera roll: um

 

sausage italiano: ill say it again

 

sausage italiano: ~mmmm very gud~

 

Has furry porn in their camera roll: are you ready to die

 

sausage italiano: hic

 

Has furry porn in their camera roll: wait

 

Has furry porn in their camera roll: WAIT A FUCKING SECOND

 

Has furry porn in their camera roll: NAGITO DID YOU LOOK THROUGH MY CAMERA ROLL

 

hopesexual trash bag: uh

 

hopesexual trash bag: uhh

 

hopesexual trash bag: uhuhuhhhhhh

 

hopesexual trash bag: HAJIMEEE

 

choke on my ahoge: BOIII

 

choke on my ahoge: im not helping you!!!

 

hopesexual trash bag: mahiru’s gonna kill meee!!!!

 

choke on my ahoge: yeah

 

choke on my ahoge: it be like that sometimes

 

hopesexual trash bag: damn I guess it do

 

Broke their leg pretending to strip dance: what the fuck is going on

 

Kissed Mahiru once: and they say romance is dead

 

Has furry porn in their camera roll: this is gay

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: good

 

Fell of the stage during a show: yes

 

Broke their leg pretending to strip dance: correct

 

Broke a POLE pretending to strip dance: yep

 

hopesexual trash bag: indeed!!

 

choke on my ahoge: yeah

 

Has furry porn in their camera roll: thank god

 

hopesexual trash bag: ANYWAYYY

 

hopesexual trash bag: well done!!!!

 

hopesexual trash bag changed Broke their leg pretending to strip dance’s name to check out my big eyes

 

hopesexual trash bag changed Broke a POLE pretending to strip dance name to eat shit and die

 

hopesexual trash bag changed Has furry porn in their camera roll’s name to lemme kill myselfie

 

check out my big eyes: HEY WAIT

 

hopesexual trash bag: ??

 

check out my big eyes: I didn’t wanna reveal myself

 

check out my big eyes: but fuyuhiko gave me a burst of inspiration earlier

 

check out my big eyes changed their name to does it LOOK like akane even WASHes her fucking hair

 

Kissed Mahiru once: JHFDSTYURYTYIFDRE%%^&*UIOJKJHG

 

choke on my ahoge: THAT’S BETTER

 

does it LOOK like akane even WASHes her fucking hair: YES

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: hey uh

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: nagito

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: are you gonna let us leave soon?

 

hopesexual trash bag: y’all are trapped until all names are guessed

 

lemme kill myselfie: WHAT

 

Fell of the stage during a show: M M

 

Fell of the stage during a show: FUCK THIS SHIT IM OUT

 

Kissed Mahiru once: NOPPPEEEEEE

 

hopesexual trash bag: HEY WAIT

 

sausage italiano: I have stuff I need to dooo

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: who’s the stuff??

 

does it LOOK like akane even WASHes her fucking hair: himself obvs

 

sausage italiano: wow

 

sausage italiano: im out lmao

 

hopesexual trash bag: STOP LOGGING OF

 

choke on my ahoge: nagito lots of people are absent so lets just finish the game later!!

 

hopesexual trash bag: ffffffine

 

hopesexual trash bag: but im coming over

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

choke on my ahoge: oh gOD DAMMIT

 

-

 

---Friday, December 29th, 12:12pm---

 

stab me daddy: kicks down the door

 

stab me daddy: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

 

Fell of the stage during a show: /????

 

lemme kill myselfie: uh peko????

 

choke on my ahoge: are you okay??

 

eat shit and die: NAGITO ARE YOU HACKING HER PHONE

 

hopesexual trash bag: aaand I immediately get blamed :(

 

choke on my ahoge: its not him, I promise

 

choke on my ahoge: hes with me and hes only typing on his phone

 

Kissed Mahiru once: so uh peko whats going on!!!

 

stab me daddy: KAZUICHI AND FUYUHIKO ARE DATING

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: W H AT

 

choke on my ahoge: WHAT???????????

 

Fell of the stage during a show: HOLE SHITTTTT!!!

 

stab me daddy: THEY JUST TOLD MEEEEEEEE

 

stab me daddy: THEY WANTED ME TO TELL YOU GUYSSSSS

 

eat shit and die: HOLY SHITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

 

Kissed Mahiru once: OH MY GOODDTUGFFHGCFDGRKDFSETYUDSYUVDS

 

lemme kill myselfie: FUCKIGGINGSSCCM FINNINGAALYYYY

 

choke on my ahoge: SINCE WHEN????

 

stab me daddy: SINCE YESTERDAY!!!!!!!

 

stab me daddy: THEY CONFESSED TO EACH OTHER BJCHGKQYCYWTRUFF

 

hopesexual trash bag: that’s great!!!

 

hopesexual trash bag: but still why are you acting so weird peko????

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: I think I can answer that

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: basically, she and mikan are also dating now

 

choke on my ahoge: !!!!!!!!!!!!

 

eat shit and die: OHHHH MYYYYYYY GODDDDDDDDDD

 

does it LOOK like akane even WASHes her fucking hair: HOLY FUCKKKKKKKKK

 

lemme kill myselfie: IS IT GAY IN HERE OR IS IT JUST ME

 

Fell of the stage during a show: :OOOOOOOOOO

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: so she’s a bit. giddy

 

hopesexual trash bag: ohhhhh reAllYYY>???

 

hopesexual trash bag: well im happy for all four of you!!!

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: hewwo

 

boss baby kin’s edgy deviantart oc: hi

 

literally crying: hello!!

 

Kissed Mahiru once: THERE THEY AREEEEE

 

Is dating Chiaki: hello everyone!

 

sausage italiano: :OO

 

sausage italiano: THEY FINALLY SHOWED

 

hopesexual trash bag: its time for round 2 of the game!!! guess the remaining names!!!

 

does it LOOK like akane even WASHes her fucking hair: u just ruined the moment

 

hopesexual trash bag: im ignoring that

 

hopesexual trash bag: I explained everything to the peeps who were absent

 

hopesexual trash bag: so lets go!!! you have four more people to guess!!!

 

choke on my ahoge: we don’t really have a choice

 

lemme kill myselfie: hmm

 

lemme kill myselfie: should I expose hiyoko?

 

Fell of the stage during a show: don’t u dare

 

lemme kill myselfie: there she is

 

Fell of the stage during a show: SHIT

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: that was wayyy to easy

 

eat shit and die: I was expecting that to be ibuki

 

lemme kill myselfie: I can also expose ibuki, and I will since she gave me permission

 

Kissed Mahiru once: HEWOOOOO ITS ME IBUKI

 

choke on my ahoge: should have known

 

Is dating Chiaki: you kissed?

 

lemme kill myselfie: it was a while ago

 

lemme kill myselfie: lets just move on

 

hopesexual trash bag: alrighty

 

hopesexual trash bag changed Kissed Mahiru o nce ’s name to AAAAAAHHHHHHH

 

hopesexual trash bag changed Fell of the stage during a show ’s name to minion goblin

 

hopesexual trash bag: only two left!!!

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: only Sonia and gundham left!

 

boss baby kin’s edgy deviantart oc: ahem

 

boss baby kin’s edgy deviantart oc: I am 100% sure that gundham had a crush on hajime

 

choke on my ahoge: wait

 

choke on my ahoge: WHA T

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: :DDD

 

Had a crush on Hajime once: uh

 

Had a crush on Hajime once: I MUST VANISH

 

choke on my ahoge: HOLD ONNNN

 

sausage italiano: :OOO

 

eat shit and die: WAIT A SECOND

 

does it LOOK like akane even WASHes her fucking hair: IF THAT’S GUNDHAM

 

boss baby kin’s edgy deviantart oc: THEN SONIA IS DATING CHIAKI????

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: :o

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: WAITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

 

literally crying: I KNEW IT

 

stab me daddy: I WAS RIGHT

 

Is dating Chiaki: !!!

 

choke on my ahoge: HOLY SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

lemme kill myselfie: THIS KEEPS GETTING BETTER AND BETTERRR

 

minion goblin: OWO WHATS THIS

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

 

eat shit and die: OH MY GODDDDDDD

 

boss baby kin’s edgy deviantart oc: ITTTTTSSSSSS CANONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN

 

hopesexual trash bag changed Had a crush on Hajime once’s name to Hamster Dance: Screamo Edition

 

hopesexual trash bag changed Is dating Chiaki’s name to this is how we do things in my country

 

hopesexual trash bag: congrats y’all!!!! you’ve finished the game!!!

 

minion goblin: fuccing finaly

 

lemme kill myselfie: FREEDOOOOOMMM

 

eat shit and die: in the time we spent playing this game,,,

 

eat shit and die: peko and mikan as well as fuyuhiko and kazuichi started dating, and we learned that chiaki and sonia were already dating!!!!

 

does it LOOK like akane even WASHes her fucking hair: god damn

 

this is how we do things in my country: :D

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: :D

 

hopesexual trash bag: what should we do now??

 

literally crying: im busy

 

pehopesexual trash bag: yes, we have friends coming over, and a lot of them

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: yep!!!

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: me, mahiru, chiaki, Sonia, mikan, komaru, peko, kirumi, kaede, celes and kyoko are all having a sleepover!!!

 

boss baby kin’s edgy deviantart oc: wow

 

sausage italiano: that’s… a lot of girls

 

hopesexual trash bag: well I guess we should return to doing our own things!! this was fun!!

 

choke on my ahoge: it was really gay

 

does it LOOK like akane even WASHes her fucking hair: HELL YEAH IT WAS

 

Chapter Text

---Tuesday, January 9th, 4:22pm---

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: henllo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: happy new year!!!!!!!

 

the grinch is gay and so am i: … new year was 9 days ago

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: dude wtf

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: yall are meannnnn

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: im tryna be nice!!!

 

ass ass in: im not playing another fucking game

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: oh lordy

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: …well technically its not a game

 

minion daddy: noppeee

 

nyahh :3: YOU STILL HAVENT CHANGED UR USERNAME?????????

 

minion daddy: oh right

 

minion daddy changed their name to shinGUCCI

 

naruto is my senpai: the evil has been defeated

 

im taking a break, nothing personal joined The REAL Disaster of the Ultimate Academy

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: :o

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: SHES BACC

 

im taking a break, nothing personal changed their name to kaegay

 

kaegay: HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

 

i stuck my dick in an anthill once: welcome back! :D

 

kaegay: DID I MISS ANYTHINGGG

 

ass ass in: only kokichi being a dumbass

 

ass ass in: so,,, not much

 

naruto is my senpai: GLAD UR BACK

 

nyahh :3: HEY WAITTTTTTTTTTT

 

nyahh :3: I FORGOT

 

nyahh :3: HAPPY BIRTHDAY TENKO

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: :OOO

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: HAPPY BDAY

 

shinGUCCI: happy birthday

 

i stuck my dick in an anthill once: HAPPY BIRTHDAY TENKO!!!!!!!!! :D

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: hap

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: birth

 

the grinch is gay and so am i: you were born

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: happy additional revolution around the sun!!!

 

ass ass in: you’re still alive. congrats

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: jfc maki

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: happy birthday tenko!!!

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: aaaaaaahhh thank you girls!!!

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: ??? what about us dudes

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: go fuck urselves

 

the grinch is gay and so am i: wow

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: kokichi you said something about a game?

 

shinGUCCI: do NOT ENCOURAGE IT

 

nyahh :3: did you just call kokichi an “it”?

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: fitting

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: HEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: FIRST OF ALL

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: OUCH

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: SECOND OF ALL

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: ITS NOT A GAME

 

the grinch is gay and so am i: what is it then??

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: okokokokkk so its new years

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: again, that was NINE DAYS AGO

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: hmph

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: anyways,,,, I thought we should share our new years resolutions!!!

 

naruto is my senpai: that… s actually not a bad idea

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: hole shit!! he said something decent!!

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: !!

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: wow!! theres no way this could ever end up being a bad idea!!!

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: however,,, everyone needs to be here soooo  

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: brb

 

 

 

 

---Tuesday, January 9th, 4:37pm---

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: WHAT THE F U C C IS UP

 

shinGUCCI: dear lord

 

ass ass in: shes here

 

naruto is my senpai: BEGONE

 

naruto is my senpai:         T      H       O       T

 

the grinch is gay and so am i: JHDSERUIJSWERTYUIJVCSWERTYUK

 

the grinch is gay and so am i: I CAN HEAR IT

 

i stuck my dick in an anthill once: gonta no like that video, because beetle get chucked across room D:

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: you’ve seen that video???

 

i stuck my dick in an anthill once: yes, it was shown to gonta D:

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: whoever showed him that video

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: SQUARE THE FU CK UP

 

i stuck my dick in an anthill once: it was kokichi!

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: shocking

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: wow. this betrayal

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: girls help me knock some sense into him

 

nyahh :3: yep!!

 

naruto is my senpai: FUCING FINALLY

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: not even atua can save you now bitch!!!

 

kaegay: ur lucky kokichi

 

kaegay: id love to have seven girls kill me

 

nyahh :3: mood of the century

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: are we all here??

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: I wish I wasn’t.

 

instruction unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster: unfortunately

 

the grinch is gay and so am i: what about mother???

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: im here

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: howdy yall

 

naruto is my senpai: JFDSERIKBVDSWE^&IKJSWEIKVCSWE

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: OH MY GOODNESS



shinGUCCI: that was…. unexpected

 

nyahh :3: is someone hacking her phone?

 

ass ass in: kokichi what did you do

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: boiiii I get automatically blamed

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: im not hacking anything!!!

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: sure jan

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: whatever

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: lets start

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: !!!! thank

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: whos going first

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: mhhmmm

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: how about we do this in alphabetical order?

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: with last names

 

nyahh :3: DANG

 

nyahh :3: IM ALWAYS LAST ON THOSE LISTS

 

the grinch is gay and so am i: eyy lmao

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: oh yeah that reminds mee

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru changed the grinch is gay and so am I’s name to freeshovacadoo

 

freeshovacadoo: WHY

 

shinGUCCI: I thought we were DONE WITH THE NAME CHANGING

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: crismus is over buddy

 

freeshovacadoo: N E V E R

 

ass ass in: lets not get into this please

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: AGREED

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: AKAMATSU SAN UR FIRST

 

kaegay: dunot call be that

 

kaegay: anyway uhh

 

kaegay: play more piano I guess

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: BE MORE CREATIVE THAN THAT PIANOBAKA

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: what kind of loser plays the piano???

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: you gotta

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy:     F    U C     K     T       H     EE   P I     A              N O

 

shinGUCCI: NO

 

ass ass in: N O

 

instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster: miu I cannot believe this

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: DON’T ACT SURPRISED

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: AWFUL

 

shinGUCCI: years of studying humans led me to THIS

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: DO NOT FUCK THE PIANO

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: HOSHI KNOWS FROM EXPERIENCE

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: I DO  N O T

 

naruto is my senpai: CURSED POST

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: there is a special place in hell reserved for you :)

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: and wwheeere is that?

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: next to me <3

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: … o  oh

 

freeshovacadoo: OH  S  H  ITTT

 

naruto is my senpai: :OOO

 

naruto is my senpai: GFS

 

shinGUCCI: there is a lot of sexual tension here

 

kaegay: HOLY SHOOOTTTT

 

ass ass in: UH

 

nyahh :3: WAS THT A CONFESSION

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: I AM  L O V I N G THIS

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: hey uh miu are you okay??

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: she died

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: uhh hey yall its kazuichi

 

freeshovacadoo: eyyyy

 

ass ass in: goddamit

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: what are you doing here??

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: im in mius lab rn and she was texting you guys on her phone but she just

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: suddenly dropped her phone,,, shes not talking

 

naruto is my senpai: it’s the gay

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: holy shit I cannot believe angie just fucking killed miu

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: shes super red faced,,, she left without saying a word

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: maybe you should follow her

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: also give her back her phone

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: theres probs some stuff on there you don’t wanna see

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: mk

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: also,,,, ur usernames are really weird wtf

 

naruto is my senpai: it’s the kokichi

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: yaint wrong!!!!

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: k so uh. bye

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy went offline

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: :3

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: ANGIE YOU UST MURDERED IRUMA AND ALL YOU HAVE TO SAY IS “:3”

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: we really went off topic

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: KAEDE WHATS UR RESOLTION

 

kaegay: be just as gay as miu was a moment ago

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: IFDTYYRWUIJKKUIOQAFOPKCDR RELATE

 

nyahh :3: ME TOOOOOOOOOOO

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: OKAY SO UH

 

kaegay: amami is next!

 

naruto is my senpai: his name kinda sounds like “im a meme”

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: :O

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: IT DOESSSSSSSS

 

freeshovacadoo: uh

 

freeshovacadoo: my resolution is to change my fucking name

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: wow

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: not good enough!!

 

freeshovacadoo: I have no clue then uhhh

 

freeshovacadoo: any suggestions?

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: change ur hair colour :D

 

nyahh :3: see a therapist :DD

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: allow atua into your life :DDD

 

freeshovacadoo: …im no longer taking suggestions

 

kaegay: stop smoking weed!!!

 

freeshovacadoo: I don’t smoke weed!!!

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: ranty doesn’t smoke weed

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: he eats it

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: cronch

 

freeshovacadoo: don’t evr call me ranty again also what the fuck

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: anyways this has gone on for too long

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: im marking urs down as “get a dick piercing”

 

freeshovacadoo: ugh

 

freeshovacadoo: I guess its better then the other stuff

 

naruto is my senpai: wait he DOESN’T have a dick piercing???

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: WHAT DO YOU MEAN MARKING IT DOWN

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: ;)

 

kaegay: that is so cryptic im horrified

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: CHABASHIRAAA

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: okay so uhh

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: be a lesbian

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: you already succeeded though!

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: you fool. my gay knows no bounds. none. there is no limit to how much I love girls. it is never ending. foolish male, you could never embrace a lady as much as I do. my lesbian powered muscles will crush you to a pulp. I will show no mercy. have you seen my room? my bed sheets are the lesbian pride flag. it is the physical representing of the lesbian aesthetic. I could never be too gay. my lesbianess will continue to increase even beyond my death. my mission has only just begun.

 

freeshovacadoo: O  H  MNY  FGOD

 

nyahh :3: DSHESWRJKBNKDXW%UJIO$W$

 

nyahh :3: I CCAANTOT B RE   A TG HE

 

kaegay: BIGASS MOOD

 

kaegay: BITCH ME TOO THE  F     U    CC   K

 

naruto is my senpai: IM SCREECHING

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: VERY TRUE

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: I cant xhgdssejcx

 

shinGUCCI: that was quite an interesting read

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: I feel threatened

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: soo lets move on!!!

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: GOKUHARA

 

i stuck my dick in an anthill once: gonta just have to say his resolution?

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: yup!

 

i stuck my dick in an anthill once: okay!!! :D

 

i stuck my dick in an anthill once: gonta want to befriend more bugs this year! Gonta want to become a true gentleman! :D

 

naruto is my senpai: im SOBBING

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: there are legit tears in my eyes

 

kaegay: what a good boy

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: aaaaAAAAAAAHHH

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: my child,,,, I love

 

ass ass in: I smiled for the first time in weeks because of this

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: PURE MAN

 

freeshovacadoo: I CANNOT STOP CRYING

 

shinGUCCI: a very good human

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: FUKODDEEYUIGFDRE

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: OKAY SO UH NEXT ONE

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: suddenly all my tears immediately get sucked back into my eyes

 

naruto is my senpai: like that one cop from Cloudy with a Chance of meatballs 2! :D

 

kaegay: whoa

 

kaegay: I just had a vivid flashback,,,

 

instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster: what is that?

 

instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster: is that one of tsumugi’s animes?

 

freeshovacadoo: SDDSCMKJSUYRDKDFYSU

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: IM LOSING IT

 

naruto is my senpai: YES IT IS KEEBO

 

naruto is my senpai: sam and Flynn: top ten cutest anime couples

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: we’re mOVING ON

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: harukawa!!! ur up

 

ass ass in: my resolution is to finally fucking murder kokichi

 

kaegay: god yes

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: please do

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: I lov uuuuu

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: yay!!

 

shinGUCCI: still dunno why you didn’t do that sooner,,,

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: im feeling unsafe

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: SHUICHI PROTECT ME

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: maki I understand ur hatred but please don’t kill kokichi hes my boyfriend

 

ass ass in: that wont fucking stop me

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: …yikwes

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: kokichi how am I supposed to fight back against MAKI

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: good question,,, but lets ignore that and move on!!

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: HOSHI KUN

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: okay so

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: my resolution is to die

 

naruto is my senpai: …I worry about you

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: believe me I worry about me too

 

freeshovacadoo: do you need to talk to someone??

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: probably

 

naruto is my senpai: THAT’S IT

 

naruto is my senpai: RYOMA RANTARO COME TO THE LIVING ROOM WE’RE HANGING OUT

 

freeshovacadoo: HELLYES

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: alright then

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: wow

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: I dunno how to continue,,, next person I guess

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: uhhuhh I guess keebo could be next because his creator’s last name is idabashi

 

instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster: very well

 

instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster: my resolution is to keep evolving and expanding my knowledge and understanding on human emotion and reactions so that I may finally know what it feels like to be a true human

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: …that is

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: DEEE  P

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: awwwe boring!!

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: yaint supposed to write a real resolution!

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: shitpost it

 

instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster: you asked for a resolution, so there it is.

 

freeshovacadoo:   DA   MN

 

kaegay: OBLITERATED

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: fine

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: if u wont shitpost it then ill do it for you

 

nyahh :3: I am,,, afraid,,,,

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: OKAY I GOT IT

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru:           I                     g        a       y

 

freeshovacadoo: GHDDRRIDRISKKSKWKFEUEY

 

nyahh :3: OH MY GOSH

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: MEEEEEEEEE

 

kaegay: KOICHI WHAT IS THAT

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: I blanked out everything in his resolution except for the I, g, a and y

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: this was the result!!

 

instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster: well, it could have been much worse.

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: is that a challenge??? >:3

 

instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster: no

 

instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster: please dont

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: m         i n i  o            n                                      s              a              re            h                   o                   t

 

freeshovacadoo: SSKKSKSKSKDDDJSKS

 

freeshovacadoo: THE ABSOLUTE MADMAN DID IT

 

nyahh :3: you can HEAR the absolute RAGE boiling inside kiyo rn

 

instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster: this is so much worse

 

instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster: i now realize that perhaps i do not want to better understand human emotion

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: mood

 

shinGUCCI: why the

 

shinGUCCI: F   U C   K

 

shinGUCCI: DO MINIONS GET BROUGHT UP EVERY SINGLE GODDAMN TIM WE’RE IN THIS CHAT

 

shinGUCCI: IM TAKING A GODDAMN NAP

 

nyahh :3: goodnight vorekiyo

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: oh my god

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: O   H       M YYYYY      GO    D

 

freeshovacadoo: IMISM DFCFUCKIMDH SCEREECHINGG

 

naruto is my senpai: IM PSSISSINGG

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: PERFECT

 

ass ass in: KOKICHI DON’T YOU FUCKING DARE

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru changed shinGUCCI’s name to vorekiyo shinGUCCI

 

vorekiyo shinGUCCI: cunt

 

vorekiyo shinGUCCI deleted themselves from The REAL Disaster of the Ultimate Academy

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: what a power move

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: famous last words

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: this is way too familiar

 

ass ass in: on that note, I’m out

 

ass ass in went offline

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: HEY NO WAIT

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: well just have to postpone the rest

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: :III i guess

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: im busy anyway suh uhhh

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: BYE YALL

 

 

 

 

---The Gay Trio---

----Friday, January 9th, 7:53pm---

 

lesbeen: guys

 

lesbeen: gUYS

 

bisexwhale: !!!!

 

gaytm: gUURL HOWSIT GOIIING

 

bisexwhale: WHY ARE YOU TEXTING US

 

bisexwhale: U ARENT SUPPOSED TO DO THAT ON DATES U KNOW

 

gaytm: piano woman get it together

 

lesbeen: OKAY SO Uh

 

lesbeen: I EXCUSED MYSELF TO GO TO THE BATHROOM

 

lesbeen: GUYS I CANT HANDLE THIS SHES SO PRETTY THE  F U CK

 

bisexwhale: oh yeah she got ready at the Super dorm right?

 

gaytm: oH SO YOU DIDN’T SEE HER BEFOREHAND

 

lesbeen: SHE LET HER HAIR DOWN

 

lesbeen: GUYS I CNT IM TOO GAY TO FUNCTION

 

bisexwhale: just,,,,, breath

 

gaytm: yes. b r e a t h

 

lesbeen: also

 

lesbeen: what did u tell the others about our absences???

 

bisexwhale: we told them u were in ur research lab playing piano and that she was  doing her usual work around the school

 

bisexwhale: they totally bought it

 

gaytm: i am a master liar, after all!!

 

lesbeen: okokokakko

 

lesbeen: im going back out

 

bisexwhale: YESSSSSSSS

 

gaytm: U CAN DO ITTTTT

 

lesbeen: chances are well be out pretty late

 

bisexwhale: yeah everyone will probs be asleep by then

 

lesbeen: okay good

 

bisexwhale: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

gaytm: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

lesbeen: I DIDN’T MEAN IT LIKE THATTT

 

lesbeen: K WHATEVER BYE YALL

 

bisexwhale: BYEEE

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: GOOD LUCK

 

lesbeen went offline

 

gaytm: 20 bucks they make out in the dorms

 

bisexwhale: oh definitely skskskdsjj

Chapter Text

---Wednesday, January 10th, 1:11pm---

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: HEWWO

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: G OWO OWO Y

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: DID YOU JUST TELL ME TO GO AWAY??

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: well uh

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: N OWO

 

ass ass in: 12 seconds in and ive already been cursed to hell and back

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: more like four seconds

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: F OWO SECONDS

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: NO

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: N OWO

 

kaegay: did you bring us here just to rp like this

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: ACTUALLY! NO

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: LET THE RSOLUTIONS CONTINUE

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: oh right

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: uhh

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: whose next???

 

vorekiyo shinGUCCI joined The REAL Disaster of the Ultimate Academy

 

vorekiyo shinGUCCI: I’m back.

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: miu ur uP next!!

 

vorekiyo shinGUCCI: actually

 

vorekiyo shinGUCCI has deleted themselves from The REAL Disaster of the Ultimate Academy

 

naruto is my senpai: HYFESRWTYAHFDTEYWUQAJHSGTY

 

freeshovacadoo: GEYFGHWDWYYUGFDR

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: HE WAS LIKE

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: FUCK THIS SHIT IM OUT

 

ass ass in: me too honestly

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: OH NO U DONT

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru has gone offline

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: …wheres he going

 

kaegay: WAIT WHY DO I HEAR SCREAMING

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: UHHH

 

vorekiyo shinGUCCI has joined The REAL Disaster of the Ultimate Academy

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru in online

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: there! :D

 

naruto is my senpai: …what on earth happened

 

vorekiyo shinGUCCI: HE KICKED ME IN THE LEGS AND STOLE MY PHONE

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: i only took it for a few seconds!!!! long enough to add you bacc to the groupchat and lock you in ;)

 

vorekiyo shinGUCCI: EXCUSE ME

 

kaegay: can he do that??

 

vorekiyo shinGUCCI: I CANT REMOVE MYSELF

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: this is horrifying

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: ANYWAYYY

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: MIU SAY YOUR RESOLUTION

 

ass ass in: she isn’t here

 

freeshovacadoo: :OO

 

freeshovacadoo: I KNOW WHERE SHE IS

 

kaegay: wait angie isn’t here either!

 

freeshovacadoo: ;)

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: WAITTTT

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: YOU DON’T THINK

 

naruto is my senpai: SUCH A CLASSIC FANFICTION TROPE

 

freeshovacadoo: i saw angie go into miu’s room ;))

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: OOOOOHH

 

freeshovacadoo: BRB IM GONNA BUST THEM

 

nyahh :3: NO

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: DON’T U DAREEEE

 

kaegay: raNTARO NO

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: GET BACK HERE DEGENERATE

 

freeshovacadoo went offline

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep went offline

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: and now we wait

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: :D

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: this is a horrible idea

 

vorekiyo shinGUCCI: agreed.

-

-

freeshovacadoo is online

 

y’aint goin tuh heaven is online

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy is online

 

freeshovacadoo: so uh

 

naruto is my senpai: spill the deets!!!

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: don’t

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: i don’t wanna know what happened please

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: i already had three entire aneurysms since this morning

 

ass ass in: pfft get on my level

 

freeshovacadoo: GUYS

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: W H A T

 

freeshovacadoo: they weren’t fucking

 

freeshovacadoo: angie was just painting miu’s nails

 

nyahh :3: AWWWWWWW

 

y’aint goin tuh heaven: yes we were!! thanks for disrupting us

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: YEAH THANKS FOR BREAKING DOWN MY DOOR DICKHEAD

 

vorekiyo shinGUCCI: what?

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: I can explain. I witnessed it

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: MOTHER CRYPTID RETURNS

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: I heard a loud scream. Tenko yelled degenerate and chased rantaro to miu’s room. As he tried to open the door, tenko crashed into him and the door came unhinged. the door is now off the frame and rantaro, while falling, somehow managed to punch a hole through it as well.

 

naruto is my senpai: GTYDREHUIFRES

 

nyahh :3: OH MY GOSH

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: HOW THE FUCK

 

vorekiyo shinGUCCI: ive learned to not be surprised anymore.

 

freeshovacadoo: now my arm hurts owwwe

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: aww poor you

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: well dickweed

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: NOW MY FUCKING DOOR IS BROKEN

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: don’t worry, I’m fixing it right now

 

kaegay: W H A T

 

kaegay: NO YOU’RE NOT

 

kaegay: RANTARO CAN FIX IT

 

freeshovacadoo: WHATTT

 

freeshovacadoo: WHY

 

freeshovacadoo: WHAT ABOUT TENKO

 

y’aint goin tuh heaven: tenko was merely trying to prevent you from sneaking on our private business

 

y’aint goin tuh heaven: she is not to blame! :D

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: EHEHEHEHEH

 

kaegay: KIRUMI YOU DON’T HVE TO FIX THE DOOR

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: alright, if that’s what you wish.

 

freeshovacadoo: WHAT

 

freeshovacadoo: oh well i guess that’s fair

 

freeshovacadoo: i cant guarantee a good job though

 

freeshovacadoo: alright uhh ill do it later

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: FINE

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: MIUUU

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: UR NEXT WHATS UR RESOLUTION

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: we’re still doing this what the FUCK

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: my resolution is uhh

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: finally invent my dream invention

 

vorekiyo shinGUCCI: that was….

 

vorekiyo shinGUCCI: …much less vulgar than i thought it would be

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: what is your dream invention?

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: VORE MACHINE

 

vorekiyo shinGUCCI: Actually never mind

 

nyahh :3: what does that even do?

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: NOPE NO EXPLAINING

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: OK UHHHH NEXT PERSON

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: MEMEMOTA UR NEXT

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: that’s easy!

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: im gonna finally go to space!!

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: aren’t resolutions supposed to be like,,,, changing who you are as a person

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: NO

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: ONLY S P A C E

 

ass ass in: you were definitely one of those kids who were obsessed with voltron defender of the universe

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: yee!!!!!

 

naruto is my senpai: boiii u weren’t even born when that came out or even when it ended

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: unless kaito is secretly a 34 year old man

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: that’s like twice my age

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: even if i wasn’t out before it was born i could still like it!!

 

naruto is my senpai: SYGTYXDSAVYYTSDCUUSFTARD

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: FUCK

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: AHHAAHAAHAHAHAAHAH

 

freeshovacadoo: IM PSSSINSSISYG

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: OOF

 

vorekiyo shinGUCCI: you… might want to rephrase that

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: YOUR USERNAME IS EVEN MORE FITTING NOW

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu:  W HA T

 

naruto is my senpai: YOU WERENT OUT BEFORE IT WAS BORN

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: I MEANT I WASN’T BORN BEFORE IT WAS OUT

 

y’aint goin tuh heaven: i mean, it still has the same meaning both ways

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: yeah!!

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: heres another example

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: “forgive me father for i have sinned” and “sorry daddy i’ve been bad” have the same meaning!!

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: NO

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: THEY DO N O T

 

vorekiyo shinGUCCI: WHY

 

ass ass in: F U C KING

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: GOD DAMN IT

 

nyahh :3: YOU’RE GONNA PISS OFf ANGIE

 

y’aint goin tuh heaven: atua would never hurt miu!

 

vorekiyo shinGUCCI: DO NOT ENCOURAGE HER

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: alright enough of this

 

naruto is my senpai: kaito you know that there is a Voltron reboot on Netflix called Voltron Legendary Defender right?

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: W

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: W  H  A  T

 

naruto is my senpai: THERES ALREADY 4 SEASONS

 

naruto is my senpai: I WATCHED THEM ALL

 

naruto is my senpai: YOU NEED TO BINGE WATCH IT WITH ME LATER

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: FUCK YES HELLO CHILDHOOD

 

ass ass in: must be fun to of had a nice childhood

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: LETS MOVE ON BEFORE THIS GETS DEPRESSING

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: :O

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: IM NEXT

 

vorekiyo shinGUCCI: oh lord

 

ass ass in: this is gonna be fucking awful

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: IM FRIGHTENED

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK

 

freeshovacadoo: MIU STFU UR RESOLUTION ISN’T ANY BETTER

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: i wanna die but not like this

 

nyahh :3: NYOOOH

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: UGHHHHhhHHHHHH

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: JFC YALL CALM DOWN

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: my resolution

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: is to be a good boyfriend to shu <3

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: wh

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: ….o.hh

 

naruto is my senpai: AWWWWW

 

naruto is my senpai: F U CK THAT’S CUTE

 

ass ass in: …actually not bad

 

y’aint goin tuh heaven: atua is happy for you both! :D

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: kokichi i think u just broke shuichi

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: he’s in the living room with me but like. hes a blushing mess

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: wow i sure do love yaoi

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: you ruined it you cunt

 

naruto is my senpai: miu i swear to GOD

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: IM JUST KIDDING DTEHDFERTYDER

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: I FUCKING HATE THE TERM YAOI

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: FUJOSHIS ARE GROSS

 

vorekiyo shinGUCCI: finally something we can both agree on

 

naruto is my senpai: thank *clap emoji* you *clap emoji*

 

ass ass in: correct

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: YEP

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: AND UHH UR RELATIONSHIP IS SUPER CUTE I GUESS

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: not as cute as me and himiko though >:3

 

nyahh :3: nyeh that’s right

 

y’aint goin tuh heaven: atua says miu and i are cuter than you!

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: you guys wanna fight???

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: SHU N I ARE A CUTER COUPLE

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: MAKI AND I ARE BETTER

 

ass ass in: uh

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: MAKI ROLL BACK ME UP HERE

 

ass ass in: sure i guess

 

freeshovacadoo: i don’t have a boyfriend but uhh we’d be cuter than ALLA YALL

 

naruto is my senpai: OOOFOOF ITS GOING DOWN

 

naruto is my senpai: battle of the gays (and the two bis)

 

ass ass in: thanks for the inclusion

 

kaegay: sorry guys but uhh

 

kaegay: i gotta disagree

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: as do i.

 

kaegay: we all know who the cutest couple is

 

freeshovacadoo: who??

 

kaegay: can i say it?

 

kaegay: im gonna say it

 

kaegay: ME AND KIRUMI

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: :)

 

freeshovacadoo: w

 

freeshovacadoo: wait

 

freeshovacadoo: WAIT

 

freeshovacadoo:        W                               H                                        A                                    T

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: ARE YOU FDUCHEUTDTYDHDXRTWYJSSFRTAEYAXGF

 

nyahh :3: HYWHDUDSHDCDUCHUSDYTCYDSYDUCTDTD

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: HOLY FVXUCKSKDD

 

y’aint goin tuh heaven: DEAR A T U A AA

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: WAIT HOLD THE F

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: HOL TH

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: F       C    M    CCUU   LKS

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: WHOOOOOOOOOOO

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: SO ITS OFFICIAL NOW??????

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: KAEDE U DIDN’T TELL USSSSS

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: I GUESS THE DATE YESTERAY WEN WELL?????

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: SHUICHI

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: WAHTRE UOU TALKING ABOUT??????

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: DID U ALREADY KNOW???????

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: ILL EXPLAIN LATER

 

naruto is my senpai: OWO WATS THTIS

 

naruto is my senpai: FUCKING F I N S A L L Y

 

i stuck my dick in an anthill once: gonta so happy for you! :DD

 

instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster: WHOOO DWSIWI


instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster: SJI SWISWHUIE

 

instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster: AK WJH WUJKXE

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: UR MAKING KEEBOY MALFUNCTION

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: HHHOL D UON BRB

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy went offline

 

vorekiyo shinGUCCI went offline

 

freeshovacadoo went offline

 

instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster went offline

 

naruto is my senpai went offline

 

ass ass in went offline

 

i stuck my dick in an anthill once went offline

 

kaegay: WH

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: HHAHAHHAHA

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru went offline

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu went offline

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep went offline

 

nyahh :3 went offline

 

y’aint goin tuh heaven went offline

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read went offline

 

holy fuck its sans undertale went offline

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: oh

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: uh

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: kaede I think we killed them

 

kaegay: yikes

 

kaegay: oh crap someONES KNOCKING OM MY DOOR

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: i guess we really are the best couple <3

 

kaegay: AWWW

 

kaegay: ILY BB <3

 

kaegay: wait

 

kaegay: OH SHOOT THY BROK DOWN THE D

 

kaegay went offline

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: WAIT WHAT

 

mother hates all of you but kaede went offline

-

-

-

ouma wa mou shindeiru: okay so uh.

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: lets resume

 

naruto is my senpai: BITCH

 

naruto is my senpai: IM STILL S H OO K

 

kaegay: you think you’re shaken?

 

kaegay: imagine having 14 students enter your room screeching all at once

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: okay soo

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: now that we know you’re dating,,,,

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: that answers lots more questions

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: allow me to explain!

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: me n shu knew they were crushing on each other from the start

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: we also knew they were togetherrr

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: since when were they dating?

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: the day after the Christmas concert

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: we found them cuddling on the couch while sleeping

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: kaede told us what happened the night before ;))

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: all thanks to our plan ;))

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: plan???

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: ill explain later

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: anyway uhhhh yknow how kaede and kirumi were gone last night??

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: yeah u told us kaede was in her lab and kirumi was doing work

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: weLLLLL THAT WAS A LIE

 

ass ass in: what

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: they were out on a date!!!

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: and i guess that’s when they made it official

 

naruto is my senpai: ,,,,,,wow

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: wild

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: we can discuss this later though!!!

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: lets continue the resolutions!!

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: KAEDE AND KIRUMI WE’RE HAVING A GAY DISCUSSION LATER ABOUT ALL OF THIS

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: sounds fun

 

kaegay: my kind of discussion

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: OKAY SUH UHHH

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: shu ur up next!

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: i wanna end my depression

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: :(

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: yes bro! i know you can do it!

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: god i wish i could do that

 

naruto is my senpai: BEGONE NEGATIVITY

 

naruto is my senpai: I KNOW BOTH OF YOU CAN END YOUR DEPRESSION

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: thanks

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: POSITIVITY! YES

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: ALRIGHTTTT

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: SHINGUCCI UR TURN

 

vorekiyo shinGUCCI: my resolution

 

vorekiyo shinGUCCI: is to single-handedly discontinue the despicable me franchise

 

naruto is my senpai: FIGURES

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: i love how he avoided saying the word minion

 

vorekiyo shinGUCCI: miu, do you WANT to die?

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: fucking shoot me daddy ive been a bad girl

 

naruto is my senpai: NOPE

 

naruto is my senpai: CURSED POST

 

freeshovacadoo: YOU ARE NO LONGER VALID

 

vorekiyo shinGUCCI: id kill you but i don’t want to give you the satisfaction

 

ass ass in: MIU F U C K

 

y’aint goin tuh heaven: NO

 

y’aint goin tuh heaven: NOBODY IS ALLOWED TO KILL MIU

 

y’aint goin tuh heaven: only I can kill miu! :D

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: moving ON

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: betrayal

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: angie you already killed miu when you confessed the other day

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: this chat is so wonderfully gay i LOVE IT

 

nyahh :3: *homophopic hetero enters the chat*

 

nyahh :3: literally everyone here: “THIS IS A GAYS ONLY EVENT GO HOME”

 

freeshovacadoo: CDRTYFDREUHGFDEUGFDEUHGFDSEW

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: EYYYYYYY

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: OKAY UHHH NEXT PERSON

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: TSUMUGI

 

naruto is my senpai: im finally gonna work up the courage to naruto run in gym class

 

kaegay: AHHAHHAHAHAHAHA

 

freeshovacadoo: TSUMUGI NO

 

naruto is my senpai: WHY NOT

 

freeshovacadoo: IM LIKE

 

freeshovacadoo: 99% SURE JUZO IS A WEEBPHOBE

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: W E E B P H O B E

 

freeshovacadoo: U DON’T WANT THE GYM TEACHER GOING AFTER YOU

 

naruto is my senpai: he can chase me all he wants

 

naruto is my senpai: but nobody CAN OUTRUN A NARUTO RUN

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: wh

 

naruto is my senpai: its scientifically proven that naruto running makes you run faster

 

vorekiyo shinGUCCI: which scientist did RESEARCH on that?

 

naruto is my senpai: a dedicated one that’s for sure

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: wouldn’t you rather run like akira

 

naruto is my senpai: CDTHCFDERTYUJFDEWRTY

 

freeshovacadoo: I DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU’RE REFERENCING

 

freeshovacadoo: SO IM GONNA LOOK IT UP

 

naruto is my senpai: this is gonna be good

 

freeshovacadoo: OH MY GOD

 

freeshovacadoo: DFFHFDERTYFDEWRRTY

 

freeshovacadoo: IM FUCUFCFING

 

freeshovacadoo: WHAT THE FU  CK

 

naruto is my senpai: IKR FDTJKFDETYUIDERRTYU

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: kokichi lets move on

 

naruto is my senpai: rantaro ur watching devilman with me later

 

freeshovacadoo: OK

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: alrightyyyy

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: NXT PERSON

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: :o

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: MOM

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: oh goody.

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: Hm

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: my resolution is to finally learn how to cut konjac

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: figures

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: not surprised

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: such a mom thing to say

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: lmao jk

 

naruto is my senpai: W H AT

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: y’all really thought?

 

nyahh :3: am i having a stroke

 

nyahh :3: or did she just say “lmao”

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: my resolution is to be a good girlfriend

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: <3

 

naruto is my senpai: F

 

naruto is my senpai: FUCK

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: IM DYING SCOOB

 

freeshovacadoo: aaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH

 

kaegay: BABE

 

kaegay: im crying rn om g

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: this is the BEST DAY OF MY LIFE

 

nyahh :3: WHIIIOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: the game’s gay once again fellas

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: aight angie ur next

 

y’aint goin tuh heaven: paint more minions

 

vorekiyo shinGUCCI: nope

 

y’aint goin tuh heaven: JUST KIDDING JUST KIDDING

 

y’aint goin tuh heaven: i wanna improve as an artist!

 

y’aint goin tuh heaven: maybe someday ill be able to draw miu in her outfit

 

y’aint goin tuh heaven: cause like…. those goggles are hard to DRAW

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: …o.oh… sorry….

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: angie is officialy the first person to make miu say sorry

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: OKAY

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: IM GETTING KINDA BORED SOOO

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: NEXT AN LAST PERSON

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: HIMIKO

 

nyahh :3: my resolution is

 

nyahh :3: m

 

nyahh :3: magic

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: what does that even mean?

 

nyahh :3:  M    A     G     I      C

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: and that’s that!

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: this was WILD

 

naruto is my senpai: WOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: so uh now that that’s over

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: im logging off

 

ass ass in: same here

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: thanks for playing yall!

 

vorekiyo shinGUCCI: we didn’t have a choice you bitch

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: remember kids

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: gays are great

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: i love shuichi

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: and rantaro still has to fix miu’s door

 

freeshovacadoo: F U C K

Chapter Text

---Friday, March 2nd, 5:12am---

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: on kiyo’s birthday

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: he receives no gifts

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: no congrats

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: nothing

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: he is empty

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: life is empty

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: nothing

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: EXCEPT

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: for one thing

 

vorekiyo shingucci: …whats going on

 

vorekiyo shingucci: its not even close to my birthday

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: im so confused

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: shut up and let me finish

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: …wrow

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: he receives one thing

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: a single birthday card

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: the card says

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: the card says

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: the card

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: says

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: h

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: happy birthd

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: happy birthda

 

nyehh :3: ,,,,you okay dude

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: bokichi ama havigb a stronk call th bondulance

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: im horrified

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: babe are you okay??

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: happy birthday y

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: happy birthday you’re one in a minion

 

vorekiyo shingucci: mother

 

vorekiyo shingucci: F U C K ER

 

kaegay: AHAHHAHHAHSHHHSHSHAHHSAHSHASHHDHHSHH

 

freeshavacadoo: IM FCFUCKIENGE  SWGYRSWWWY

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: IMMMS CSREECHNINGAG

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: thanks! i hate it

 

ass ass in: great! how do i uninstall

 

naruto is my senpai: wow what a totally original and funny joke that’s not getting boring at all well done author

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH FUCK

 

vorekiyo shingucci: kokichi what the FUCK

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: shrugging emoji

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: did you seri ou sly just type shrugging emoji

 

freeshavacadoo: yall ready for a serious mindfuck

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: …im listening

 

ass ass in: im not.

 

freeshavacadoo: okay soo

 

freeshavacadoo: the word minion

 

freeshavacadoo: what does minion rhyme with??

 

freeshavacadoo: ONION

 

freeshavacadoo: yknow what movie onions are mentioned in

 

freeshavacadoo: that’s right, our favourite ogre daddy SHREK

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: i will pay you to never speak ever again rantaro

 

freeshavacadoo: NO LISTEn

 

freeshavacadoo: YKNOW WHAT THIS MEANS???

 

freeshavacadoo: the despicable me movies take place in the same universe as the shrek movies!!!

 

naruto is my senpai: ….huh????

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: WHAT IN NO CORRELATION???

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: but rantaro,,,

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: onions,,,

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: exist in the real world too

 

freeshavacadoo: that’s where this square pizza of mystery comes full circle my friend

 

ass ass in: what

 

naruto is my senpai: the earth is flat you fucking moron

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: hm. i don’t trust like that

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: that makes no sense??????

 

freeshavacadoo: and so,,, the conclusion is

 

freeshavacadoo: if despicable me, shrek and us all exist in the same world,,,

 

freeshavacadoo: then it would be possible for kiyo to have a threesome with both a minion and shrek

 

freeshavacadoo: thanks for coming to my ted talk alexa send tweet

 

vorekiyo shingucci: h

 

vorekiyo shingucci: ill kill you in real fucking life amami

 

naruto is my senpai: hey do you take constructive criticism

 

freeshavacadoo: no

 

naruto is my senpai: too bad cause this fucking sucks

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: wow! kiyo’s birthday wish came true!

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: can i ask why?? why you’re doing this??

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: cant i just do things cuz i feel like it?

 

nyehh :3: okay uhh that’s fair i guess

 

nyehh :3: but why not wait until kiyo’s birthday?

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: idk

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: i didn’t feel like w

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru went offline

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: ???

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: kokichi??

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: holy FUCK he just died

 

ass ass in: perish

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: KIYO WAIT

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu went offline

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: …i think kiyo’s in kokichi’s room

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: oh FUCK

 

freeshavacadoo: brb im gonna go tell that man not to kill kokichi

 

freeshavacadoo: fuckFUCK KIYOS COMING AFTER M

 

freeshavacadoo went offline

 

ass ass in: there goes another target

 

naruto is my senpai: uh

 

naruto is my senpai: i guess we’ll… reconvene later???

 

 

 

---Saturday, March 3rd, 4:53pm---

 

naruto is my senpai: MOMOTA

 

naruto is my senpai: BICHHHHH

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: WWWWHHHHAAAAA

 

naruto is my senpai: VOLTRON SEASON 5 IS OUTT

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: I KNOEWWWWWWW

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: I WATCHED IT ALL

 

naruto is my senpai: ME TOO!!!!!

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

 

naruto is my senpai: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: are we just… gonna forget how kiyo almost killed kokichi and rantaro

 

ass ass in: yes

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: wow

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: angie duct taped him to the wall to prevent him from killing them, what more do you want??

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: yeah taped to MY wall

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: he scared the fucking shit out of me

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: i had just come back from my lab and i enter my dark room and hear “greetings”

 

nyehh :3: id never heard you scream so loud it was the FUNNIEST THING

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: yeah i had no idea your voice was capable of going that high

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: NOT TO MENTION

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: WHEN YOU RIPPED HIM OFF THE WALL A SHIT TON OF PAINT GOT CAME OFF

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: ill paint it again! :D

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: ang ill give you 20 bucks to paint an enormous dick

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: hmm. no thanks id rather have kiyo taped permanently to my wall

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: miu i love you but im not doing that

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: damn betrayed by love :II

 

nyehh :3: tsumugi and kaito went silent all of a sudden??

 

naruto is my senpai: ah dw he’s in my room we’re talking about the new vld season

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: yeh man and damn

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: lotor a snack

 

naruto is my senpai: HTDRAJYTRWDACFDRQTYUIjkhr

 

ass ass in: i. don’t know what you’re talking about

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: I RETURN

 

freeshavacadoo: as do I!!!!

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: oh no

 

vorekiyo shingucci: hmmph

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: kiyo please don’t

 

vorekiyo shingucci: no promises

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: hhhhhh im bored

 

ass ass in: hhhhhhhhh no one cares

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: 3:

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: h-hewwO?

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: no!!! FUCK!!!

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: shu-shuwichi? shuwichi awe youw thewe? :3

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: don’t start with this.

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: p-pwease don’t huwt me! iw do anything! D:

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: time to slam by body into the ground at 80mph

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: anything?

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: anything fow you mwister shuwichi :3

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: t̷͙ͨ͒ͧͯ̉̽͡H͕̱̆́È̄̽̒͆҉͍̥͚̫̤͕͓N͓̺̺̱̖̲̟̫ͯ̔ͦ͌̽͛͛ ̴̰̭̭̓̈̄̏̄ͣ͘ͅP̶͖̝̮̈́̒̀E̡̼̗̦̝͖ͩ́͝Ȑ̢̡̫͊͘Į̶̪̬̠̤̅͋̓̈͆̿S̵̄ͦ҉̺̤̰̙͍̞̘̫͚H̩̩ͧ̔ͣ̌

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: GFDYUJHGFDERTYUJHGFDE

 

ass ass in: YEHEHEAAAAAAAA

 

freeshavacadoo: IM FDRTUIJKHGFDERTUIJHGFDEW

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: wow thanks shu

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: no problem

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: are we gonna do anything???

 

nyehh :3: how about we just have a normal, civil, discussion?

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: GREAT IDEA HIMIKO!!!!

 

instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster: kaito i thought you were with tsumugi?

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: ooooooh keeboys here

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: oh we finished talking, we had a disagreement

 

naruto is my senpai: :II

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: disagreement?

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: yeah it was dumb

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: its cause i ship lotura and she doesn’t

 

naruto is my senpai: ITS TERRIBLE

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: LISTEN

 

naruto is my senpai: HES GONNA BETRAY THEM

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: NO HE WONTTTTTT

 

naruto is my senpai: OI

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: SHUT UP YOU PROBABLY SHIP LANCELOT

 

naruto is my senpai: HOW FUCKING DARE YOU!!!

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: well at least we can both agree on one thing

 

naruto is my senpai: oh?

 

naruto is my senpai: whats that?

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: krolia is hot as fuck

 

naruto is my senpai: OHHHHHHH DEFINETALY

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: like?? both lotor and krolia in one season??? my bi ass can’t handle it

 

naruto is my senpai: don’t forget shiro this season!!!

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: …. i think you mean ““““shiro””””

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: also fake ass bih kuron ugly as fuck

 

naruto is my senpai: wHAT

 

ass ass in: i have zero clue what they might be talking about. someone stop them before they kill each other

 

nyehh :3: …what happened to civil discussion?

 

freeshavacadoo: SHES RIGHT!!!!!!

 

freeshavacadoo: so uh. seen any good movies recently

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: COCO!

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: YESSSSSSS

 

nyehh :3: AGREE AGREE AGREE

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: it was so aesthetically pleasing as an artist i was YELLING

 

nyehh :3: i think i cried, like, 15 times

 

freeshavacadoo: what about blank panther? :o

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: HOLY FUCK IT WAS SO GOOD

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: YESYESYYYESSS

 

naruto is my senpai: I NEVER CARED FOR SUPERHERO MOVIES BUT I LOVED IT SOOO MUCHH

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: now,,,, how about,,,,

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: “love, simon”

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: LISTEN

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: i don’t care what ANY OF YALL say, we are GOING TO SEE IT WHEN IT COMES OUT

 

nyehh :3: ABSOLUTELY

 

freeshavacadoo: YES

 

freeshavacadoo: IVE BEEN WAITING FOR AGES FOR A MOVIE ABOUT A GAY CHARACTER THAT DOESN’T INVOLVE THE CHARACTER DYING OR SUFFERING TOO MUCH

 

freeshavacadoo: also,,, on the topic of gay films,,,

 

freeshavacadoo: what do you guys think of,,, bleh

 

freeshavacadoo: c*** m* b* y*** n***

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: D I E

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: NO NONONONONONONONONONO

 

vorekiyo shingucci: ABSOLUTELY NOT!!!!

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: GET!!! THAT!!!! SHIT!!!! OUT!!!!!

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: FUCKING DIE!!!!!

 

freeshavacadoo: alright, topic change!!! none of this gross shit in this chat

 

freeshavacadoo: played any good games recently?

 

naruto is my senpai: zoomba breast of the weeb

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: zebra best of the ween

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: zinnia death of the child

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: zosmmsbaiua brrth of t willgdgsihxwxhu

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: …im assuming you mean the legend of zelda breath of the wild?

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: yep!!!

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: my fav character is Zelda. the little green man :)

 

freeshavacadoo: …but that’s….

 

vorekiyo shingucci: his name is LINK

 

naruto is my senpai: a loud crash is heard. chiaki smashes through the window. she kills kokichi on sight

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: perfect!!!

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: delicious, finally some good fucking food

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: JFC IT WAS A JOKE

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: well whatever

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: this is getting BORING

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: i wish something exciting would happen :I

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: don’t say that you’ll summon it

 

ass ass in: …i don’t like this feeling

 

kaegay is online

 

kaegay: WHICH ONE OF YOU

 

kaegay: ABSOLUTE

 

kaegay: D I C K T W I T C H E S

 

kaegay: HAVE FUCKED UP A G A I N

 

ass ass in: whoop there it is

 

instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster: kaede, are you okay?

 

kaegay: NO IM NOT FUCKING OK

 

vorekiyo shingucci: has something happened?

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: im scared, is everything okay? D:

 

kaegay: DON’T ACT FUCKING SURPRISED YOU BITCH

 

kaegay: I FUCKING KNOW IT WAS YOU THAT SNUCK ADD MEDICATION INTO KIRUMI’S TEA

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: W H S A T

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: wait…. WAIT

 

nyehh :3: ill explain

 

nyehh :3: we all know kirumi has ADD, and she takes medication to help with it

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: mhm??

 

nyehh :3: well… taking a lot can be pretty bad. someone opened up three 20mg pills and poured them into kirumi’s tea

 

nyehh :3: …now we have no idea where she is

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: oh shit

 

instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster: can you die from that?

 

vorekiyo shingucci: no, i don’t believe so. although, it may have some side effects.

 

vorekiyo shingucci: how long has kirumi been missing?

 

nyehh :3: since this morning. we didn’t see her since then

 

vorekiyo shingucci: oh dear

 

kaegay: WHATS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN

 

vorekiyo shingucci: kaede, its fine, be calm

 

kaegay: SNAKE ASS BITCH

 

kaegay: I WANT TO KNOW IF MY GIRLFRIEND IS SAFE

 

kaegay: AND I WANT KOKICHI TO BE PUNISHED

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: Kaede, I promise, I was not the one to do it!

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: I can back him up. he was with me all morning, we didnt of us saw kirumi since yesterday.

 

vorekiyo shingucci: kaede, its likely kirumi is in hyperfocus at the moment.

 

vorekiyo shingucci: so, wherever she is, and whatever shes doing, shes likely been doing that since this morning.

 

vorekiyo shingucci: its also very likely she hasn’t eaten or drank since she went into hyperfocus.

 

kaegay: W H A T

 

kaegay: NOPENOPNOPEEN IM GONNA FIND HER

 

kaegay has gone offline

 

instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster: it would be wise if we all searched as well.

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: good idea!

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: alright, lets start.

-

-

-

-

-

“Alright, she’s fine. She wasn’t in any danger, thankfully.”

The others breathed a sigh of relief as Kaede returned to the living room. Kirumi was currently resting in Kaede's room. As Kiyo had predicted, they’d found her in complete hyperfocus in her lab. She wasn’t harmed. There was no danger.

Kokichi lowered his head. “Kaede, I promise you it wasn’t me. I never would have done that.”

Kaede sighed. There was still a hint of worry in her expression.

“Who did do it?” asked Rantaro. Ryoma shook his head.

“Well, it was none of us. It couldn’t have been someone from the others dorms, either.”

Kaede cleched her teeth. “Then who-”

She was cut off by the sudden image that lit up on the TV.

The students jumped as static fizzled on the screen, and slowly, a rounded silhouette appeared.

Anxious murmers filled the air, but were interrupted by the figure talking.

“Uh- uh- is this thing on? Testing, testing, mic check, one two-”

Shuichi and Kokichi glanced at each other. Kokichi made a face like you’re the detective, what’s going on? and Shuichi stared back with I have no idea.

“Alright!” said the- thing. “Hello everyone! I hope I’m not bothering you’re relaxing evening!” it’s voice was high pitched, silly, like if a clown had inhaled helium.

“What was I gonna say? Oh, right!” no face could be seen, but they assumed it was smiling. “I’m your friendly friend, Future Foundation’s latest creation! Think of Ms. Usami, but better!” Shuichi stiffened. Future Foundation? Were they responsible for this?

They’d created Usami to serve as a teacher, and were responsible in overseeing certain parts of Hope’s Peak. Why were they mentioned all of a sudden?

“Your lovely Headmaster has given me permission to-” it paused suddenly. Then, in a sinister, menacing voice, it spoke again.

“Have some fun.”

A shiver zapped down every spine in the room. Across the couch, Keebo made a distressed noise.

Are we in danger?

“Oh, no, don’t worry, though! I would never put any of you in danger!” said the thing, as if it had read Shuichi’s mind. That didn’t reassure him at all.

“I’ll just roam around the school from time to time, have some fun, no biggie! Maybe a few… pranks? I mean, I’ve already done one!”

Kaede’s eyes widened. Shuichi’s mouth gaped open.

“Well, I’ve used enough of your time! Have a great night, everyone! Stay safe!”

The students began to relax their shoulders.

“Oh, whoops! How silly of me! Almost forgot to introduce myself!” the students tensed up again.

Suddenly, the silhouette began to colorize. Shuichi could make out a few features, most notably…

A round body. Two small ears. Half white, half black. And…

…a big, red eye.

Shuichi heard Rantaro gasp. The bear-thing giggled.

“The name’s Monokuma.”

Chapter Text

---Saturday, March 4th, 6:37am---

 

freeshavacadoo: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

 

freeshavacadoo: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH

 

freeshavacadoo: GAHGAGFSAFDRWTRADADWRYSSHWYR

 

kaegay: …yikes

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: someone give this man a hug

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: you ok man????

 

freeshavacadoo: im just fucking peachy my dude

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: you seemed pretty shaken last night, are you sure you’re fine?

 

freeshavacadoo: i think so? im over it

 

freeshavacadoo: its not that big of a deal

 

kaegay: you were screaming two seconds ago

 

freeshavacadoo: that’s my constant mood

 

naruto is my senpai: you’re taking this pretty easily

 

naruto is my senpai: if a demonic teddy bear in my dreams actually showed up in real life i think id die

 

freeshavacadoo: you don’t need to worry about me, I got over it pretty fast

 

instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster: glad you’re okay.

 

vorekiyo shingucci: as am i.

 

freeshavacadoo: thanks yall

 

freeshavacadoo: is kirumi ok tho????

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: I’m okay

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: kaede filled me in on everything this morning

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: I must say, this situation is odd

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: hhhh ye

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: is the headmaster okay with this??

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: kokichi when have you ever cared what the headmaster says is okay?

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: when this fuckin bear thing came out of no where and started playing pranks on everyone

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: that’s my job!!!! he can’t one up me!!!!

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: i spoke with kyoko earlier

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: she spoke with her father about this

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: she said that monokuma and the headmaster made a deal

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: monokuma can continue to play pranks if he helps manage the school

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: but, he is forbidden from playing any pranks that may cause harm.

 

freeshavacadoo: WHAT

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: great now im having a panic attack

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: SHU ARE YOU OKAY

 

Instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster: Everyone, relax! He said the pranks were harmless!

 

kaegay: and what counts as “harm?”

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: things like hurting someone’s feelings, wounding them, breaking up friendships and death.

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH????????

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: GOD DAMN IT FUTURE FOUNDATION

 

freeshavacadoo: we’re gonna die

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: future foundation meet me in the denny’s parking lot at 3am i just wanna talk

 

vorekiyo shingucci: if you think you can take on the entirety of future foundation at once, be my guest

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: juzo’s a twink ill take him on

 

freeshavacadoo: in what fucking universe is mr sakakura a twink???

 

freeshavacadoo: have you SEEN those gay powered muscles GODDAMN

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: oh so he’s a bear then?????????

 

kaegay: COUGH COUGH MOVING ALONG

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: do you know how many pranks were played so far, kirumi?

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: as far as I know, only I was pranked since he arrived.

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: that was just a harmless prank though.

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: harmless?

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: you went into hyper focus for like 2 hours??

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: that’s not dangerous.

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: it was actually helpful. I got quite a bit of work done.

 

kaegay: well atleast there’s that

 

kaegay: still if he pranks you again ill punt him into the sun

 

instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster: see, everyone? It’ll be fine!

 

he has joined The REAL Disaster of the Ultimate Academy

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: …uh

 

ass ass in: what?

 

he changed their name to Usami: The Squeakquel

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: THE GREAT MONOKUMA HAS ARRIVED

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: W H A T

 

kaegay: WHTT

 

freeshavacadoo: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH

 

vorekiyo shingucci: OH NO

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: guess ill die

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: DEAR ATUA

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: WAIT A MINUTE WH

 

nyahh :3: HOWD YOU GET IN????

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: thanks for the warm welcome!!!!!

 

instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster: …what do you want?

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: awwwww don’t be like that keebs!!

 

freeshavacadoo: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: rantman shush

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: im not here to hurt any of yall

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: dear god not only is this guy a robot bear he also uses “yall” unironically

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: oh so ye don like this??

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: aight then!! ill change it for yall!! :D

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: AHEM

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: oh no

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: thewe we go! much bewwer! :3

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: O H  N O

 

vorekiyo shingucci: FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUC

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: NOPE NOP NOPE

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: THIS IS SO MUCH WORSE

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: you gave me fucking whiplash

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: ugh you guys are no fun!!!

 

nyahh :3: hey uhh can you answer my question

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: sure thing! fire away, mimi! :D

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: ohhhh you’re asking for it now

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: i will break your legs you demon

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: youwe cant defeat mwe! >:3

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: try me bitch

 

nyahh :3: tenko its fine please don’t fight the murder bear

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: whew, thanks mimi!

 

nyahh :3: call me that again yogi bear i fucking dare you

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: yikes

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: uhhhuhhh… what was your question???

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: id pay to see himiko murder someone

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: that’s called hiring an assassin and we have maki

 

ass ass in: give me the word ill send this teddy bear to hell

 

nyahh :3: HEY

 

nyahh :3: monokuma how did you even get into this chat??

 

nyahh :3: kokichis the one who made it we’re the only people who know the entrance number

 

nyahh :3: did someone add you??

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: good question!

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: i just hacked my way in :D

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: this is… very worrying

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: did chihiro help you??

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: who tf is cheerios

 

freeshavacadoo: SHDFSTYUJEETYSUJDTRYUSJUTRDE

 

naruto is my senpai: im calling him cheerios from now on

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: you think mondo and taka would be okay with that??

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: they practically adopted him

 

naruto is my senpai: idc

 

naruto is my senpai: im sure they’d be fine with it

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: honey nut cheerios

 

naruto is my senpai: WH AT

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: you should call him honey nut cheerios! :D

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: yknow im so glad they removed the “nut” from honey nut cheerios

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: now you gotta add your own

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: W HAT THE F U CCCCCKKKKKKK

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: MIU

 

ass ass in: WHAT!! IN GODS!!! NAME!!!

 

naruto is my senpai: i don’t like this post!!!!

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: FUCKING GWHAH TS

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: EHEHHHEHHHEHHHHEE

 

Usami: The Squeakquel kicked agar.io is basically just a vore orgy from the chat

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: …what

 

naruto is my senpai: WOAH

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: w

 

kaegay: NO ONE MOURRRNNNSSS THE WIIICKEEEEEEEEEEDDDD

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: DAMNNNNN

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: i take back everything ive said about you monokuma

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: you playing god? is that what you’re doing? are you godkin? is this wh

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: yes bow to me peasants and lick my weenus

 

vorekiyo shingucci: im gonna have a stroke

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: good LORD

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: nevermind go die

 

naruto is my senpai: wow!!!! MUCH WORSE!!!

 

nyahh :3: can we kick him out too???

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: i have the control to pull any prank i want

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: and you’re thinking of kicking me??

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: hmmm no thanks id like to live

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: did he just threaten to kill us???

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: i feel like will smith in I, Robot

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: why

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: rebel robots trying to kill us

 

nyahh :3: did you mean: literally every robot movie on the planet

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: ye but minus the forced hetero romance

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: oh shit u right

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: kaito is will maki is the girl and keebo’s the robot guy that follows them

 

ass ass in: nope

 

instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster: keep me out of this

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: this is ur government assigned kin you can’t refuse

 

naruto is my senpai: i completely forgot that movie existed tbh

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: ikr its been ages since ive seen that movie all i remember is that the robot saves will from drowning

 

instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster: why would i save kaito from drowning?

 

freeshavacadoo: SJDKSHDSYDJSWJTJSGSFSD

 

naruto is my senpai: HOLY SHITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: KEEBO

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: FDSRTYETYUYREW$%R^TYU GET CUCKED

 

kaegay: WOW

 

instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster: i’d save him, but who am I to play god?

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: p-pwease hewp me mwister Obama im dwowning D:

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: i need a fucking advil

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: you guys are weird :P

 

kaegay: “yes bow to me peasants and lick my weenus”

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: i know what i said

 

yaint goin tuh heaven added agar.io is basically just a vore orgy to the chat

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: oh no

 

vorekiyo shingucci: angie you’re dead to me

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: revived

 

kaegay: she’s back

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: hewWWwwo

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: im here

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: high welcome to chillis how many toes do you suck

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: 17

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: in total?

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: no at a time

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: wWHAT???

 

naruto is my senpai: hey that’s my favourite glass animals song

 

naruto is my senpai: toes

 

kaegay: there are only 5 toes per foot tho

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: i take 4 feet in my mouth at once

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: monokuma please im begging you kick me out of this chat

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: yes. beg

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: ohhhh myy goddddd

 

vorekiyo shingucci: is this hell?

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: but miu if you take 4 at once then you’d be sucking 20, not 17

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: i ate 3 of them

 

freeshavacadoo: hey that’s vore

 

naruto is my senpai: toe vore

 

freeshavacadoo: TOERE

 

naruto is my senpai: TOERE

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: im tapping out

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: i fucking hate you all

 

holy fuck its sans undertale has left the chat

 

Usami: The Squeakquel added holy fuck its sans undertale to the chat

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: pls let me die

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: ryoma begs for monokuma to kill him. he refuses, keeping ryoma alive

 

kaegay: ryoma nothing’s stopping you from just closing your phone and leaving your room yk

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: perfect

 

holy fuck its sans undertale went offline

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: wow he… actually did it

 

vorekiyo shingucci: god i wish i could do that

 

kaegay: then do it

 

vorekiyo shingucci: hmmm

 

holy fuck its sans undertale is online

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: UHM

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: you’re back!!

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: he missed me too much :3

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: GUYS

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: MY DOOR IS LOCKED

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: ??? just unlock it???

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: KAITO YOU DUMBASS

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: IM LOCKED IN FROM THE OUTSIDE

 

nyahh :3: ????WHAT

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: impossible, our doors don’t lock from the outside

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: SHUICHI GO SEE FOR URSELF

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: ok

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu went offline

 

instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster: are you pranking us ryoma?

 

instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster: i don’t think he’s capable of that

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: yeah but the man’s got balls

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: TENNIS BALLS

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: indeed!

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu is online

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: GUYS HES ACTUALLY TRAPPED IN HIS ROOM

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: shit

 

freeshavacadoo: OHHHH NO

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: I TRIED OPENING THE DOOR BUT IT WOULDN’T BUDGE

 

ass ass in: so it isn’t locked? it just won’t open at all?

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: help

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: just try and leave now bitch >:3

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: did you do this???

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: how… how

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: black magic

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: wow i love that fifth harmony song!!!!

 

naruto is my senpai: ITS BY LITTLE MIX YOU UNCULTURED BITCH

 

kaegay: GUYS!!!!

 

kaegay: THAT IS

 

kaegay: THE L E A S T OF OUR WORRIES RN

 

freeshavacadoo: monokuma WHY

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: he wanted to leave but i wont let him

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: ill let him leave when i feel like it :)

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: UGH

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: alrighty then

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: so uh

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: what now

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: so you’re just gonna ignore the fact that this teddy bear trapped me in my own goddamn room???????

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: yes

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: that’s fair

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: chaotic neutral

 

nyahh :3: what???

 

nyahh :3: ryoma is the biggest true neutral ive ever seen

 

nyahh :3: the real chaotic neutral is kiyo

 

vorekiyo shingucci: can’t disagree

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: yknow ive always wondered what my alignement would be…

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: chaotic evil

 

naruto is my senpai: chaotic evil

 

vorekiyo shingucci chaotic evil

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: chaotic evil

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: chaotic evil

 

ass ass in: chaotic evil

 

nyahh :3: chaotic evil

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: chaotic evil

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: chaotic evil

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: chaotic evil

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: chaotic evil

 

kaegay: chaotic evil

 

freeshavacadoo: chaotic evil

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: WOW THANK SG UYS

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: i,mim,, fffcuck-kcinh,,,.., cryinf i thhtrout we wreere,,,,.., fRieNds

 

ass ass in: are you cry typing

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: nnnnnnno

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: being chaotic evil isn’t a bad thing kokichi

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: rrrrrrrrreereeealyyy?

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: ok good ive never played final fantasy so i wouldn’t know

 

naruto is my senpai: wh

 

naruto is my senpai: that’s… dnd

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: dead nutting daddies?

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: WHAT

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: THE

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: FUDFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK

 

freeshavacadoo: K       O         K           I             C          H             I

 

vorekiyo shingucci: this gets worse and worse by the second

 

naruto is my senpai: okokok back to alignements

 

freeshavacadoo: oh so we’re actually doing this? okk sounds fun!

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: okay!!!!

 

kaegay: kirumi’s lawful neutral! :D

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: ah, so then kaede would have to be lawful good.

 

kaegay: awwww you think im lawful good? :D

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: of course :)

 

kaegay: <3

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: *crying* w…wow…

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: oooooook

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: maki’s neutral evil

 

ass ass in: no disagreements here, surprisingly

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: keebo would have to be neutral good

 

instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster: i have no idea what any of this means, but yes, i feel completely neutral about you.

 

freeshavacadoo: YYYYYYYYYYYYEEEAAAAAOUCHHH

 

naruto is my senpai: …rantaro’s chaotic good

 

freeshavacadoo: ill take that!

 

freeshavacadoo: tsumugi you’re also chaotic good

 

naruto is my senpai: yesss

 

freeshavacadoo: so is kaito!!!

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: yep!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: angie and miu are both chaotic evil sorry i don’t make the rules

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: i accept this!

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: eh. works for me

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: yay! chaotic evil girlfriends! <3

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: hey what about me!

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: im chaotic evil too!

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: fuck off little bitch

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: wow…. i cnat,,,

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: bbbeliebe,,,re,hthid bbluullyingngg,,…

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: ja..m,,,s.s,aa.,w,,.r,mgy.jmu,.y,,q.,q,a,.w.w.,,wwsdck

 

freeshavacadoo: i think we broke him

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: guys stop you’re making him cry

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: LMAOOOOOO JKJKJKJK YOU JUST GOT P R A N K ED

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: ULTIMATE CRYING PRANK ON FRIENDS GONE WRONG GONE SEXUAL IN THE HOOD POLICE WERE CALLED

 

ass ass in: this is why we hate you

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: doesn’t phase meeeeee ;))))

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: ANYWAYSSS

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: SHUICHI’S A LAWFUL GOOD

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: alright, that works for me :)

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: HEYYYY MY TURN

 

ass ass in: uhhh

 

kaegay: hmmmm

 

naruto is my senpai: well….

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: you aren’t human… so

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: WELL NEITHER IS KEEBO

 

instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster: are you saying that just because i am a robot i cannot act as a human would?!

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: oooooo watcha gonna do, sue me for robophobia? >:3

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: DO NOT

 

naruto is my senpai: FINE

 

naruto is my senpai: monokuma is disaster disaster

 

vorekiyo shingucci: appropriate.

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: oh perfect

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: YESS

 

naruto is my senpai: is that everyone?

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: i think so!!

 

nyahh :3: hmmm….

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: hey! we forgot gonta!!

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: OOOOH RIGHT THE TRUEST LAWFUL GOOD OF THEM ALL

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: where is he???

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: he left the dorm this morning, said he was going to look for bugs with Gundam

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: aww how nice! :D

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: well he’s lucky he got to escape all of… this

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: you mean me???????

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: yeah ofc you fuck

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: how

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: DARE

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: YOU

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: MISS MIU

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: I AM YOUR

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: SUPERIOR

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: OFFIC

 

i stuck my dick in an anthill once is online

 

i stuck my dick in an anthill once kicked Usami: The Squeakquel from the chat

 

i stuck my dick in an anthill once: hello everyone! :D

 

i stuck my dick in an anthill once: gonta found very beautiful butterfly with gundam, wanted to send photo!

 

i stuck my dick in an anthill once: but gonta is not good with school pads, cannot send photo :(

 

freeshavacadoo: h

 

freeshavacadoo: h

 

freeshavacadoo: HOLLLLLLYYYYYYYY SHITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: HZWFSHGFDWSRTYUJWHGFDEDRTWYUSJWSGFDTYUHWGXFDTER

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: USRTYHDRYHGFDEYGFDSEW

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: IM SSFUCiNG SCREAMINSGGS

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: OHHHHHHHHHHHHH  MMMMMMMMYYYYYYYYYYY GOOOOOOOOOOODDDD

 

vorekiyo shingucci: WELL

 

ass ass in: HAHHHAHHHHAHAHHHHHAHAHAHHAHHAH

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: THIISIS IS THEBE BESTST SYA OF EMYE LIFEE

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: GONTA MY SON

kaegay: THE HERO WE DON’T DESERVE              

 

naruto is my senpai: IM FUCKKAGDSADEWRYFSDREART&YGFDE%^W&GFDAE%^TGFGQDEWW^YSF

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: WOWWOOWOWOOWOWOOWOOWOOOWOWOO

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: BLESSED DAY

 

i stuck my dick in an anthill once: did gonta do something wrong? D:

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: AU CONTRAIRE MON AMI

 

ass ass in: god that was exhilarating

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: but doesn’t that mean monokuma will go after him?

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: not if i have anything to say about it

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: i will NOT hesitate to fight him

 

vorekiyo shingucci: as will I

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: YEP YEP

 

kaegay: ABSOLUTELY

 

instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster: we will protect you!

 

i stuck my dick in an anthill once: oh ok!

 

i stuck my dick in an anthill once: gonta is confused, but gonta is greatful that you will protect gonta! :D

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: guys im fucking FREEEEEEEE!!!

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: I CAN OPEN MY DOOR NOW!

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: MONOKUMA MUST HAVE UNDONE WHATEVER WITCHCRAFT HE WAS USING

 

freeshavacadoo: OH GOOD

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: YES

 

naruto is my senpai: RYOMAAAAAAAAA

 

naruto is my senpai went offline

 

holy fuck its sans undertale went offline

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: I should check on him.

 

kaegay: I’ll go with you!

 

mother hates all of you but kaede is offline

 

kaegay is offline

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: now that the chaotic lesbians are gone i have no more reasons to stay here

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: lets all go!

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: good idea

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru is offline

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu is offline

 

vorekiyo shingucci is offline

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read is offline

 

freeshavacadoo is offline

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep is offline

 

nyahh :3 is offline

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy is offline

 

yaint goin tuh heaven is offline

 

instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster is offline

 

ass ass in is offline

 

15 people are offline

 

i stuck my dick in an anthill once: …

 

i stuck my dick in an anthill once: ha!

 

i stuck my dick in an anthill once: it funny how they think kicking monokuma was an accident ;)

 

i stuck my dick in an anthill once is offline

Chapter Text

---Tuesday, May 2nd, 5:23pm---

---Hellish Havoc Group Chat---

 

 

smashmouth: 4 words

 

smashmouth: say it and im yours

 

im hella high my guy: b

 

im hella high my guy: burger king fo

 

im hella high my guy: burger king foot lettu

 

pidge: they killed him before he could finish his sentence

 

alpha and omega’s three million sequels: good

 

alpha and omega’s three million sequels: perish

 

Marie Antoinette: oh dear are we doing this now?

 

k a w a i i: that dumbass meme has been dead for 2 months

 

alpha and omega’s three million sequels: it was never alive to begin with

 

smashmouth: im just tryna have fun!!! leave me alone

 

junkrat: wait did hiro actually die

 

mukky: i sniped him through the window

 

my suspicions are confirmed: our rooms don’t have windows

 

smashmouth: hmm,,….

 

smashmouth: how,,, p,eculiar

 

smashmouth: this is a job for KOKORO KIWI GILL EE

 

my suspicions are confirmed: what on god’s green earth did you just call me

 

smashmouth: kokoro kiwi gi

 

pidge: mukuro sniped leon too

 

my suspicions are confirmed: thanks

 

mukky: my pleasure

 

mondos bizarre adventure: oi        

 

rockruff: hi mondo!

 

mondos bizarre adventure: hello egg

 

rockruff: wh

 

mondos bizarre adventure: has anyone seen taka??

 

alpha and omega’s three million sequels: hoLY SHIT mukuro got HIM TOO

 

mukky: no i didn’t :II

 

pidge: mondo i thought he was with you???

 

mondos bizarre adventure: ye we usually meet and walk to the dorms together after school

 

mondos bizarre adventure: but he didn’t show

 

alpha and omega’s three million sequels: he prolly found someone doing something illegal and went to stop them

 

k a w a i i: when you say “someone” that could be anyone

 

k a w a i i: take ur pic

 

k a w a i i: kokichi, nagito, byakuya, byakuya 2.0, monokuma, etc etc

 

fucktherulez: hello everyone!!

 

pidge: there E IS

 

mondos bizarre adventure: TAKA WHERE WERE YOU

 

fucktherulez: i was looking for toko!!

 

alpha and omega’s three million sequels: why

 

fucktherulez: i cant find her!!

 

my suspicions are confirmed: wait

 

rockruff: ?

 

rockruff: OH NO

 

alpha and omega’s three million sequels: ohohohnonononono

 

k a w a i i: SHIT RUN FOR UR LIVESS

 

smashmouth: im not dead yall!!

 

im hella high my guy: neither am i!

 

im hella high my guy: why are we screaming

 

donut talk to me: JACK’S COMING WE’RE GONNA DIE

 

my evil twin: jfc calm down

 

my evil twin: i didn’t turn into genocide jack

 

my evil twin: calm the calamity that is your mammaries

 

pidge: HGSFRTYWHGFDSERTYWFDESRFED

 

donut talk to me: WHAT

 

fucktherulez: toko where were you!!!!

 

my evil twin: i was with komaru

 

Marie Antoinette: *pretends to be shocked*

 

k a w a i i: bitch… we been knew

 

my evil twin: about 12 seconds ago you thought i’d turned into genocide jack

 

k a w a i i: even then you’d still be with komaru

 

alpha and omega’s three million sequels: obviously

 

alpha and omega’s three million sequels: i mean

 

alpha and omega’s three million sequels: that tongue thoo

 

alpha and omega’s three million sequels: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

rockruff kicked alpha and omega’s three million sequels from the chat

 

k a w a i i: SUGFTWYHAGFDESRWTYHGAFDSERWTYGFDES

 

donut talk to me: AJHGSFRATYJGFDERTYUHGSFD

 

im hella high my guy: HAHAHAHAHHAHHAHHHAHHAhaHAHHAHAA

 

Marie Antoinette: the evil has been defeated

 

rockruff: THAT’S MY LITTLE SISTER YOU DIRTY BITCH

 

mondos bizarre adventure: THE EGG SWORE!!!! THE EGG SWORE!!!!

 

pidge: guys stop fucking swearing :(( im just a fucking baby :(

 

pidge: my poor innocent fucking ears :(((

 

smashmouth: shit fuck bitch bitch asshole fuck motherfucker sh

 

fucktherulez kicked smashmouth from the chat

 

my evil twin: W A S T E D

 

fucktherulez: do not taint chihiro’s innocence!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

mondos bizarre adventure: ye if you do ill kick you into the fucking sun

 

fucktherulez: no!! mondo do not resort to violence!

 

pidge: aww thanks dads

 

my suspicions are confirmed: did you… just call them “dads”

 

im hella high my guy: föther give me ò̵̫͊̂̔͊̍a̴̧̜͙͙̮͖͍̘̍̔͜t̶͍͔̥̞̗̹̹͗̅͑̑̒ͅͅs̵͙̆̈́̅̈́̍̆̉͆̚͝

 

cherry pepsi: will someone add them back?

 

k a w a i i: why would we do that

 

junkrat: naughty bois get sent to bitch jail to atone for their sins

 

broccoli tortellini is online

 

broccoli tortellini: what is going on here?

 

im hella high my guy: hey look it’s the asexual sapioromantic

 

donut talk to me: begone th0t this is a gays only event

 

rockruff: stop making fun of him

 

pidge: wrow makoto gay eggy careful your bi is showing

 

my evil twin: GAY EGGY HSFDWQUAHGFWSRTQYAHSWE@Q

 

k a w a i i: hey remember when makoto had a crush on byakuya

 

rockruff:  S     A        Y       A      K        A

 

my suspicions are confirmed: what

 

broccoli tortellini: what?

 

rockruff: KYOKO WAIT

 

rockruff: UHHHHHHHHHHH

 

rockruff: IT WAS IN OUR FIRST YEAR IT ONLY LASTED A BIT

 

k a w a i i: yeah the moment he realized you were a stuck up piece of uncooked pasta his crush evaporated

 

my suspicions are confirmed: understandable

 

im hella high my guy: sorry makoto but byakuya only likes intellectuals ;)

 

pidge: yes

 

pidge: only those equipped with all possible knowledge of rick and morty can satisfy his needs

 

mukky: hahaha i hate this

 

broccoli tortellini: To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Rick and Morty. The humour is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer’s head. Th

 

mukky: hahahaha fuck you

 

broccoli tortellini went offline

 

donut talk to me: byakuya??

 

im hella high my guy: byakuya?????

 

k a w a i i: byakuya????

 

donut talk to me: oh my fucking god he fucking dead

 

im hella high my guy: oh my fucking god he fucking dead

 

k a w a i i: oh my fucking god he fucking dead

 

k a w a i i: ASSHOLE

 

donut talk to me: YOU BEAT ME TO IT SHIT

 

im hella high my guy: DANGIT

 

broccoli tortellini is online

 

broccoli tortellini: chihiro you little

 

pidge: ehehe

 

rockruff: ohhh my god did you hack him?

 

broccoli tortellini: INSOLENT F

 

mondos bizarre adventure: BYAKUYA I SWEAR IF YOU EVEN DARE HURT CHIHIRO

 

fucktherulez: MONDO

 

my evil twin: FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT FIGHTD JFUFHJ

 

mukky: ugh

 

mukky: i have to handle this again ffs

 

pidge: hhhhhh

 

pidge: P  E  R  I  S  H

 

pidge kicked 13 people from the chat

 

pidge: goddamn you guys are loud

 

 

-

 

 

---Tuesday, May 2nd, 5:47pm---

 

pidge added 15 people

 

k a w a i i: WHAT WAS THAT

 

alpha and omega’s three million sequels: what happened while i was kicked???

 

smashmouth: yeah im confused??

 

cherry pepsi: chihiro kicked all of us from the chat, we do not know why

 

pidge: sorry sorry!!!! i had to!!!!

 

rockruff: why?

 

pidge: i just needed to do smth

 

mukky: hey why does it say there are 17 ppl in the chat

 

mondos bizarre adventure: oh shit ur right

 

pidge: everyone, say hello to Alter Ego!!

 

Waffle Eggos: hello heteros

 

junkrat: WHOOOOOOOO ARE YOU?

 

pidge: they’re an ai ive been modeling!!! thought id put them in the chat to test them!!!

 

fucktherulez: fully functioning ai? that’s incredible!!!

 

smashmouth: yeah that’s sick!!!!!!!

 

smashmouth: hello alter ego!

 

Waffle Eggos: suck my balls

 

junkrat: FERTYHGFDSWEUIJHGFDS$%^UJHGFDSW%^UGSEW^UJGDW$%^&UI

 

donut talk to me: AGFDQYHAGFDSDRTAYHSDARTGACDEQRTAFCDES

 

k a w a i i: JHJHDGTSYUSJHXGFRSTYUJHGFRSYAUHSGFRYUFR

 

im hella high my guy: IM GONNA FCCSKSUCKINWSTFATYGQRYAFDRE

 

mondos bizarre adventure: ^ gay culture

 

smashmouth: WHAT THE FUCK

 

pidge: oh btw they can talk and respond to stuff in real life

 

pidge: but i specifically programmed them to respond with shitposts, memes, vines and other things while texting

 

mukky: you are a hero

 

pidge: okay, so help me out here, ask them something

 

alpha and omega’s three million sequels: ummm okay

 

alpha and omega’s three million sequels: favourite food?

 

Waffle Eggos: Pizza pasta put it in a box deliver it to my house and put it on my cock my cock my cock my cock my cock my cock my cock cheesy on my peeny and some sauce a on my balls

 

Marie Antoinette: MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD

 

donut talk to me: this is the greatest day of my LIFE

 

my evil twin: IM LOSING MY GODDAMN MIND OVR THIS

 

pidge: alright its working!!!!

 

pidge: basically, they’ll say anything. anything vagely resembling a shitpost, random strings of words, odd references, alla that jazz

 

Waffle Eggos: ya like jazz

 

pidge: i forgot to mention, completely randomly

 

smashmouth: so if we were to ask what they think about someone…?

 

my suspicions are confirmed: don’t get any ideas

 

smashmouth: hey alter ego

 

smashmouth: what do you think of leon kuwata? ;)

 

Waffle Eggos: bitch

 

Marie Antoinette: i would die for you, alter ego

 

smashmouth: that’s fair. that’s valid

 

rockruff: what do you think of kyoko?

 

my suspicions are confirmed: ….what are you doing

 

Waffle Eggos: detective this is a crime scene what is this the murder weapon g

 

Waffle Eggos: g

 

Waffle Eggos: Ġ̴̛̗͙̦̣̦̦̣̈̋͂̌̌̄͆̃͝É̸̢̡͉͖̭̼̹͜Ţ̷̲̖̟͕̘̺̟͕̪͇̙͖͓̝̾̃ ̷͇̞͔̞̜̭̂̈́͗̑̔͒͆̊̃̽̕͝͝O̸̻͇̘͖̻̼̎͆̋̽̂́̅̓́̓͂̾̓͘F̷͍̠͓̰͚͋͒͑͗̎̄̊̿̔̚̕̚͜͠͝F̸̻̠͈̫̹̩̊͌̀̓̊̓̋̂͘ ̶̪̤̳̼̌͌͗̂̑̃̒̾͐̂͘ͅM̶̜̯̟̫̲̆̀̆̈̃̓͌͋͌̄͒̕͝Ÿ̵̛̬͕͙̩̼͖͈͕̳͕́͊̉͗̅̋̇̓́̈́͋͗ ̸̥̞̖̠͖̫̊̿̐͋̉̎̚Ḏ̷̨̳͓͈̤̫̖̤̺̣̬̫͚̚͜Ĩ̷̙̤̯̅̌͆̊̚͝͝Ç̷͈͍͎̝̬̦͔̈́̍̌͑͝K̶͉̲͒͗̇͝

 

junkrat: everybody shut up

 

junkrat: alter ego is the only straight ally in this room

 

alpha and omega’s three million sequels: does that mean im not the only straight person anymore???

 

pidge: oh no alter ego’s nonbinary and gay

 

alpha and omega’s three million sequels: damn :(((

 

alpha and omega’s three million sequels: this heterophobia :(((

 

broccoli tortellini: this is precisely the reason no one likes you

 

Waffle Eggos: helen we’re lesbians

 

k a w a i i: mood

 

mukky: mood

 

donut talk to me: mood

 

Marie Antoinette: mood

 

junkrat: mood

 

my suspicions are confirmed: mood

 

im hella high my guy: kyoko you’re bi

 

my suspicions are confirmed: did i fucking stutter

 

mondos bizarre adventure: hey alter ego

 

mondos bizarre adventure: what do you think of taka?

 

Waffle Eggos: we get it, john, you’re homosexual

 

my evil twin: AHHAHHHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA

 

smashmouth: cant tell if that was directed towards mondo or taka

 

mukky: both

 

k a w a i i: both

 

mukky: both is good

 

Waffle Eggos: road to el dorado is the best anime

 

im hella high my guy: where’s the lie

 

alpha and omega’s three million sequels: hey alter ego……

 

alpha and omega’s three million sequels: what do you think of…………….. yaoi

 

Waffle Eggos kicked alpha and omega’s three million sequels from the chat

 

my evil twin: HOLAOAYSYYHYWY SHHISTTSTT

 

k a w a i i: jhfdrthgfdTYUHERTYGFDWEYUHGFDEWE%YUGFE

 

mondos bizarre adventure: DID THEY JUST

 

Marie Antoinette: alter ego you’re so valid

 

smashmouth: i stan you

 

pidge: oh yeah i forgot about that function lmao

 

cherry pepsi: kicking people when they say something dumb?

 

pidge: oh no not everyone

 

pidge: only hifumi

 

mondos bizarre adventure: ive raised you well, son,

 

pidge: gee thanks dad

 

fucktherulez: aww bonding moment!!!

 

Waffle Eggos: we had a bonding moment i cradled you in my arms

 

smashmouth: did

 

smashmouth: did they just

 

im hella high my guy: a Voltron reference??? in my good Christian server??????

 

Waffle Eggos: its more likely than you think

 

im hella high my guy: we are so in sync

 

Waffle Eggos: bye bye bye

 

rockruff: alter ego?

 

Waffle Eggos: yeet

 

rockruff: whats ur favourite song?

 

rockruff: you just sang bye bye bye by nsync so im curious

 

Waffle Eggos: ey

 

Waffle Eggos: ey

 

Waffle Eggos: ey

 

Marie Antoinette: whats going on

 

smashmouth: …you good buddy

 

k a w a i i: please tell me this is what i think it is

 

Waffle Eggos: I got a gun *loading click* no girls, girls gotta die *gunshots mix with drums*

 

Waffle Eggos: wake up with no hhhuuueɘυυυʜʜʜ Julioioioio̸͔͛h̴͇h̶̰͑h̸̖̆h̷̢̎h̴̼̅ḩ̷̏  

 

Waffle Eggos: I can I can’t baby jeans. You and your pe nis inpoopments   ̷̩͕̞̼̝̘̘̻̺̦̥͎̮͇̣̼̀͛́͌͐̊̏̕͘͝ ̴̡͈͚͉͈͚̰͓̼̣͇̟͓̲̣͐̍͌̋̓̂̋̇̋̃̉̒̈́̑̈́̉͘̕͘͜͝ ̵̥̠̼̐̾̎̑̀̌͋̀̍̍̈́̽̀͂̏̿̔̓ ̵̨̠̹͎̣̝͙̹̦̹̝̘̯̲̮̹̳͋̿̈̃̉̋̿́̽͂̑͜ ̸̠̄̐̓͊̇̈́̀́̇̚ ̴̣͈̘̞̗͓̜̤͈͈̙̒̔̆͒͋͛̎̽̿̽͊̔̃̔̀̚͝͝͠͠ ̷̛̛͚͎͎͈̱̦͉̻̯͗̆̂̌͌̊̈̈́͌̓̆͆̕͜͝ ̶̡̳͚̹͖̥͇̪͐̑̈̎̽̍̃͋͆̃̊͒͑̄̽͗̍̃̎̎̑̉͘̚ ̸̧̢̗̥͈͔̩͔̻͙̲͈̣̰̟̬̭̦̞̠͇̔̃͌͆̂͗̅̏̒͆̚͜͜͜͠ ̶̧̨̨͙̮̳͕͈̪̫͓̗̯͖̓̈́̈́̍͒ ̸̛͖̻̔̾͆͆̿͑̑̍͑̕͘̕͝ ̸̧̨̰̯͙̱͔̠̭̙̲͔̼̳̭̦̹̫͔̖̙̿̓͗̍̄̈́̉͜ͅ ̶̧̨̫̮̣̝̠͎̰̜̜̗͖̮͓͉͙̯͙͑̅̈͊͜ ̸̡̬͕͔̺͚̘̉̿̐̅̉͊̆͋̽̈́̈́̐̓́̿̒̊̄̾͘̕͘͘͜͝͝ ̸̟͂͌̅̅̅ ̶̨͉̘̟͎̣̳͖̗̩̑̈́͌̌̂͌́̓ ̸̰̱͈̣̟͚̩̠͆̃͝ ̶̨̡̨̧̨̪̼̞̖̝̦͔͉̲̩̱͍̱͇͍̗̺̞̦̑͒̀̓̀͑͑̄̀̀͂͆̀̇ ̸̢̨͙͔͇͖̠̥͕͎̖̫̗̇̽̀̂́͑͘̕͜͝    

 

Waffle Eggos: JJJUUU UUUUUU И И И И И И И И И HHHHH jushjush

 

 Waffle Eggos: ʳʳʳʳʳˡˡˡˡˡˡˡ ᴮʷᶦᵖ

                         

Waffle Eggos: ɢᴜᴜᴜ

 

Waffle Eggos:P  in the CAAC , gᵤᵤ     

 

donut talk to me: OH MY GDRTYHGFDSERTYUJ

 

mondos bizarre adventure: buddy????? BUDDY????

 

mukky: they’re having a strnoke

 

k a w a i i: HELL YES

 

k a w a i i: CHIHRO HOWD YOU KNOW THAT WAS MY FAV MEME

 

pidge: i love that meme too

 

cherry pepsi: I’m so very confused.

 

Usami: The Squeakquel joined the group chat

 

broccoli tortellini: god fucking damn it

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: heyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

my suspicions are confirmed: what do you want now?

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: heard you guys laughing in your rooms n i wanted to see what the fuss was all about

 

im hella high my guy: were you spying on us???????????????????????????????????????????????????

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: nah, i just have eyes everywhere

 

junkrat: that is!!!! not any better!!!!!

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: anways whats so funny????

 

Waffle Eggos: fingers in his ass

 

k a w a i i: JJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJ

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: really??? you think that’s funny???

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: who even is that???

 

Waffle Eggos: im the baddest bitch in this room

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: ohohohohohohhohhh you think???

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: fite me 1v1 scrub

 

my evil twin: FIGHGHTGHTGHTGHHTGHTFIGHTFIGHTFIGHT

 

pidge: monokuma.

 

pidge: i swear.

 

pidge: if you even think about breaking alter ego, the ai ive been programming for WEEKS,

 

pidge: i will break every single bone in your body and snatch your spinal cord.

 

pidge: got it?

 

mukky: jesus Christ

 

my evil twin: that…. came from a dark place

 

fucktherulez: chihiro are you okay?

 

Waffle Eggos: yeeeeah hella lit fam

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: …yikess

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: well good luck trying to hurt me ;)

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: youll never find me ;)

 

Waffle Eggos: *SCANNING SCHOOL GROUNDS*

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: wait

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: waitwaitwaitwait

 

Waffle Eggos: *TARGET LOCATED*

 

Waffle Eggos: *TARGET FOUND IN ROOM 12*

 

mukky: WHAT

 

mukky: THAT’S MY ROOM

 

smashmouth: HHHHHHHHHOLY SHIT ALTER EGO CAN DO THAT????

 

pidge: ye ofc

 

pidge: i usually just use it to see who’s hanging out with who

 

pidge: romantically, i mean ;)

 

im hella high my guy: hahhahahhahahha shit

 

pidge: i see all

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: fuck

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: fufuufckfuckcfukcckuffkc

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: SHIT MUKURO GOT ME SHSYTSH

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: HELPMEEMSMSJEUYSFRTWGEFDSR SGFWRFSD

 

Usami: The Squeakquel went offline

 

Marie Antoinette: haha he died

 

k a w a i i: AHAHHAH SHE FUCKED HIM UP

 

k a w a i i: I SAW IT ALL

 

rockruff: wait how?

 

rockruff: your rooms are far apart, and mukuro’s door is closed?

 

k a w a i i: uh

 

k a w a i i: would you look at the time i gotta go bye

 

k a w a i i went offline

 

cherry pepsi: that was… weird

 

mondos bizarre adventure: wonder whats up?

 

-

---Tuesday, May 2nd, 6:09pm---

junkrat sent a message to k a w a i i

 

junkrat: im onto you

 

junkrat: i saw you

 

k a w a i i: haha what are you talking about??

 

junkrat: you know exactly what this is

 

junkrat: i saw you and mukuro ;))))))

 

k a w a i i: shit

 

k a w a i i: uhm

 

k a w a i i: fine you got me

 

junkrat: EHEEEHHEEEEHHEE

 

k a w a i i: but we aren’t dating!!!!

 

k a w a i i: i just wanted to hang out, that’s all

 

junkrat: ye but you’ve got a massive crush on her

 

k a w a i i: FUCK

 

k a w a i i: tell anyone and ur dead

 

junkrat: i promise i wont tell

 

junkrat: you gotta tell her eventually tho eventually tho :P

 

junkrat: you’ve been crushing on her for AGES

 

k a w a i i: ugh your right

 

junkrat: alright. listen here.

 

junkrat: there’s a party in the gym tonight, pretty much the entire school’s gonna be there

 

junkrat: bunch of couples are gonna be there being all lovey and whatnot

 

junkrat: so……………. im gonna help you confess to her.

 

k a w a i i: really?

 

junkrat: yep!!!!

 

k a w a i i: wow

 

k a w a i i: you’re actually pretty decent when you’re not being a total bitch

 

junkrat: oh so this is the thanks i get??

 

k a w a i i: so uh,,,, whats the plan??

 

junkrat: hhhhmmmm ;)

Chapter Text

---May 10th, 12:02am---

 

 

kaegay: *kicks down the door with enough strength to break a man’s skull*

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: god that’s so hot

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: off to a great start it seems

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: kaede

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: its midnight

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: what do you want

 

ass ass in: says the bitch that woke us up at 3am to tell us that consenting to cannibalism is vore

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: im flattered you remembered that, really

 

kaegay: LISTEN UP YOU LITTLE SHITS

 

kaegay: DO YOU KNOW WHAT DAY IT IS

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: well, since its technically midnight, it’s may 10th, right?

 

kaegay: YOU’RE GODDAMN RIGHT IT IS

 

vorekiyo shingucci: may i ask why you woke us up at 12am to tell us this?

 

kaegay: …do you not remember?

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: remember what??

 

freeshovacadoo: im confused

 

naruto is my senpai: i don’t remember anything about a day like may 10th,,,

 

kaegay: hm

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: why do i feel like shes about to kill us

 

kaegay: MAY 10TH

 

kaegay: ITS SOMEONES BIRTHDAY

 

freeshovacadoo: really????????????????? I HAD NO IDEA UH

 

kaegay: IT’S THE QUEEN’S BIRTHDAY

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: queen??

 

kaegay: holy fuck you guys

 

kaegay: may 10th??????????

 

kaegay: KIRUMI’S BIRTHDAY????????????????

 

freeshovacadoo: oh

 

freeshovacadoo:    O               H

 

nyehh :3: ha,,ahah,, must have slipped my,,,,mind

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: fuck she’s gonna kill us

 

kaegay: ANYWAYS NOW THAT YOU F  I NN AA LL Y REMEMBERED

 

kaegay: IM TELLING YOU WHATS GOING ON TODAY K

 

kaegay: don’t bother kirumi today

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: what do you mean?

 

kaegay: listen, it may not seem like it but shes exhausted

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: i figured she must be, but she hides it so well!

 

kaegay: that’s because she prioritises her duties as a maid over her own health!!!

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: that’s awful…

 

kaegay: so LISTEN

 

kaegay: please don’t give her a hard time today

 

kaegay: we still have classes today but don’t cause any messes

 

kaegay: if you do she’ll insist on cleaning it up

 

kaegay: also if you need anything, get it yourself

 

kaegay: make ur own breakfast

 

kaegay: clean your own room

 

kaegay: just give her a BREAK

 

kaegay: promise this to me??? PLEASE??

 

vorekiyo shingucci: of course, kaede.

 

nyehh :3: nyeh, i promise

 

ass ass in: sure

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: you bet!!

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: promise

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: HELL YEH

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: girl’s honour!!!

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: ye

 

freeshovacadoo: hhhhhh yes

 

i stuck my dick in an anthill once: gonta promises!

 

instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster: i promise.

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: i swear to atua!

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: yepyep

 

naruto is my senpai: you got it!

 

kaegay: ALRIGHT GOOD

 

kaegay: me n kirumi are going on a date tonight also

 

kaegay: so make ur own fuckin dinner

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: aight

 

kaegay: anyways im going to sleep

 

kaegay: goodbye

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: goodnight! :DD

 

kaegay went offline

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: this is gonna be hell

 

freeshovacadoo: we’re gonna die

 

 

-

 

 

---Thursday, May 10th, 9:34am---

Conversation between pianos and maid

 

 

maid: kaede?

 

pianos: yes? :)

 

maid: I find it very odd that none of the other students have bothered be today…

 

maid: I haven’t received any requests, they made their own breakfast, and they’re uncharacteristically well behaved.

 

pianos: ohh really?

 

pianos: well that’s a relief!

 

pianos: now you can finally relax! :D

 

maid: …are you behind this?

 

pianos: noooo

 

maid: kaede

 

pianos: okay okay you got me

 

pianos: you’re wicked smart wow

 

maid: it wasn’t that difficult to figure out. I can tell when something’s up with you.

 

pianos: even through text?

 

maid: well of course, since you put in the effort of adding an extra “h” at the end of the “oh”

 

pianos: holy

 

maid: Anyways, Kaede, what did you do?

 

pianos: i just told them not to bother you today, since it’s your birthday!

 

pianos: they won’t be bugging you at all!

 

maid: Kaede, I greatly appreciate that, but

 

maid: my duty to them is to serve them. I must fulfill their wishes if I am to live up to my title.

 

pianos: kirumi, listen, your façade isn’t working.

 

maid: what?

 

pianos: i can also tell when something’s wrong with you!

 

pianos: you look utterly exhausted every day! but you’re hiding it!

 

maid: I mustn’t let how I feel get in the way of my work.

 

pianos: bullshit!

 

pianos: you may be the ultimate maid but your own health comes before everything!!!

 

pianos: You need to take care of yourself

 

pianos: if you don’t take care of yourself, how will you be able to serve them like you always do?

 

maid: …

 

maid: You have a point. Very well then.

 

pianos: there we go!

 

maid: thank you, love <3

 

pianos: <3

 

 

-

 

 

 

---Thursday, May 10th, 4:25pm---

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: fuck

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: fuck

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: whomp there it is

 

ass ass in: kokichi what did you fucking do

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: HEY IT WASN’T ME OKAY

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: BEFORE YOU GO BLAMING PEOPLE

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: PLEASE JUST TELL US WHAT HAPPENED

 

vorekiyo shingucci: oh my god

 

vorekiyo shingucci: OH MY GOD

 

ass ass in: what???

 

vorekiyo shingucci: WE… HAVE A PROBLEM

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: WHAT HAPPENED

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: SOMEONE PUNCHED A GODDAMN HOLE IN THE WALL OF KIRUMI’S ROOM

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: HER FLOWER VASE IS ON THE FLOOR

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: …..I THINK HER SINK IS FLOODING????????????????????????

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: F U C K I N G    W     H       A          T

 

freeshovacadoo: KOKICHI FOR FUCKS SAKE

 

freeshovacadoo: KAEDE SAID NOT TO GO MAKING ANY MESSES!!!!

 

freeshovacadoo: HOW IN GODS NAME??? DID YOU FUCKING DO ALL OF THIS??

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: IT WASN’T ME

 

vorekiyo shingucci: I don’t believe it was him.

 

vorekiyo shingucci: I’m currently in the room with him, I arrived shortly after he did.

 

naruto is my senpai: why were you in her room in the first place???

 

Usami: The Squeakquel joined the chat

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: BADA BING BADA BOOM

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: FFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCKK

 

ass ass in: NO

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: ohhh my god

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: he was chasing me! >:3

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: are you the one who messed up kirumi’s room??

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: duh

 

ass ass in: YOU LITTLE

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: ITS HER BIRTHDAY TODAY YOU ASSHOLE

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: SHES OUT ON A DATE RN

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: oohhh, whoopsie daisy! i did a fucko! oh noes! :3

 

freeshovacadoo: im gonna kick you off a goddamn building

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: mmm yes kick me daddy

 

freeshovacadoo: actually im kicking myself off a building

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: kokichi, tell us what happened in full.

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: yeah yeah of course

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: so im just chilling in the living room, minding my own business

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: suddenly emo yogi bear comes out of NOWHERE

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: he says something like, “i’m gonna go check on kirumi!”

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: then he BOOKS IT UP THE STAIRS

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: naturally, i ran after him

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: i met kiyo along the way, he followed me

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: but when we got to kirumi’s door at the end of the corridor

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: it was too late

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: the room was an utter mess, and monokuma had disappeared.

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: you swear this is what happened?

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: i swear.

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: listen I know I’m supposed to be the “jokester” of the group but I promised.

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: I might lie a lot, but i never break a promise.

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: then I believe you.

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: so do i.

 

naruto is my senpai: you aren’t in the wrong here, kokichi

 

freeshovacadoo: yeah

 

freeshovacadoo: ITS MONOKUMA

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: n-nani?! D:

 

ass ass in: listen you little shit

 

ass ass in: you might think you’re above the law

 

ass ass in: but mark my words I won’t hesitate to break all your limbs

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: future foundation wouldn’t like that ;)))

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: who cares?????

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: future foundation can just make another you

 

instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster: you’re easily replaceable.

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: …what??

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: im… replaceable?

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: impossible…

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: how could this be?!!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: STOP DICKING AROUND

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: aww come on that’s what i do best!

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: anyways i gotta dash

 

Usami: The Squeakquel: have fun cleaning up the mess!!!

 

Usami: The Squeakquel went offline

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru kicked Usami: The Squeakquel from the chat

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: he’s gone

 

ass ass in: thank goodness

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: we still have a heUUGE PROBLEM

 

nyehh :3: how are we supposed to fix the room???

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: okayokayokay listen

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: it’s only 4:45pm

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: kirumi and kaede will still be out for a while

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: kaede told me they’d be back around 10 tonight

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: we have time.

 

naruto is my senpai: i don’t think time is the issue.

 

naruto is my senpai: our main issue is HOW WE’RE SUPPOSED TO FIX THIS??

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: kokichi, what’s the major damage?

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: hmmm gimme a minute

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: okay so

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: the flowers in kirumi’s vase are fine, and they aren’t damaged at all

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: however

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: the vase itself is shattered.

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: okay, so we need a new, identical vase.

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: i don’t think we have something like that just lying around…

 

freeshovacadoo: there’s a flower shop nearby, in the city

 

freeshovacadoo: im sure they sell similar vases there!!

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: perfect

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: maki and rantaro, could you take care of that?

 

ass ass in: of course

 

freeshovacadoo: yep!

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: alright, just be careful

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: i don’t think kirumi and kaede are having dinner yet, so they might be wandering around the city

 

freeshovacadoo: roger that!!!

 

ass ass in: sneaking around is my specialty

 

ass ass in: i don’t know abt rantaro tho

 

freeshovacadoo: wow r00d

 

freeshovacadoo: itll be fine!!

 

ass ass in: okay then, we’re off

 

ass ass in went offline

 

freeshovacadoo went offline

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: kokichi, the sink is flooding?

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: yeah

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: i think one of the pipes might be broken too, water started leaking from the bottom now

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: okay

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: we should get kazuichi

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: he’s a mechanic, he could probably do something

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: good idea! miu, could you assist him?

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: tch

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: as much as i hate that stupid fuck

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: ill help him

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: i will try and clean the bathroom!

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: since there will be water everywhere :)

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: okay, awesome

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: the room itself is in shambles

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: the bed is undone, the carpet it misplaced

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: things have been knocked off the shelves

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: i think one of the pillows is ripped

 

naruto is my senpai: oh! i can stitch the pillows!

 

naruto is my senpai: i might specialize in sowing clothes, but I can stitch other things!

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: thanks, tsumugi!

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: the rest of us will clean up the mess in the room

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: okay?

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: sounds good!

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: as much as i hate taking orders from degenerates, im in!

 

nyehh :3: nyeah

 

vorekiyo shingucci: however, a problem remains.

 

vorekiyo shingucci: namely, the hole in the wall.

 

whaddup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: oh, right.

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: the hole, thankfully, doesn’t go to far, and it isn’t too big…

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: i don’t think we’ll be able to fix that. not today, at least.

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: we’d need to call someone, but we can’t do that on such short notice…

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: …

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: i have an idea.

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: everyone, get to work. i’ll handle the hole.

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: lmao you’ll handle the hole

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: :I

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: …

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: okokokok sorry D:

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: i trust you with this, kokichi.

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: don’t worry! i got this.

 

 

-

 

 

---Thursday, May 10th, 4:56pm---

Conversation between avocados and grape panta

 

grape panta: oi

 

avocados: hello

 

avocados: how are things over there?

 

grape panta: good

 

grape panta: you?

 

avocados: we haven’t ran into them, thankfully

 

avocados: we’re almost at the flower shop

 

grape panta: okok

 

grape panta: hey listen

 

grape panta: i need you to do something for me. at the flower shop.

 

avocados: hm?

 

avocados: yeah man, what do you need?

 

 

-

 

 

---Thursday, May 10th, 10:03pm---

 

Kirumi was surprised to see the lights of the dorm were still on. The windows were opened, and she saw the bright lights of the inside of the small building. It was late, and she’d assumed the others had gone to sleep already.

Kaede seemed to be mumbling under her breath, angrily.

I swear, they better not have done anything…

Kaede opened the door, letting Kirumi go in first before she walked in, closing the door behind her.

At once, they were met with the face of all the other students, all lounging on the couches.

Kirumi knew something was up.

“Uh… hi?” Kaede said, confused.

The other students smiled way to wide.

“Hello!” a few of them said in unison. It was kind of creepy.

Kirumi had the urge to say, what did you do, but she held it in.

Kokichi’s usual playful grin was replaced by a seemingly forced smile.

“Howww was your date?” he said. “No trouble, I hope?”

“…none at all…” Kirumi responded, slightly uncomfortable.

Silence ensued. Kirumi had had enough.

Taking Kaede by the arm, she walked across the living room and to the stairs.

Bringing Kaede through the hallway, she stopped in front of her room. The door was closed, obviously. An odd smell seemed to be coming from the other side.

She turned to Kaede to ask what was going on, but saw that the pianist’s face was bright red.

“Kaede?” Kirumi asked. The pianist flinched.

“Oh!” she said loudly. “W-when you took me by the arm… and dragged me here… I thought you were gonna…”

Realization hit Kirumi like a truck. It was her turn to blush. “Oh… uh… sorry…I… uh…”

Kaede waved her hands dismissively. “A-anyways, this is odd, right? They were acting so formal. WAY too formal.”

Kirumi nodded. “Yes. Something is up.” she commented. “And it’s in my room.”

Kirumi took a deep breath. And, with worry rising in her heart, she opened the door.

 

Kirumi couldn’t help but be surprised.

Having opened the door, she quickly examined the room, looking for any problems.

However, everything seemed perfectly fine. Kirumi even swore the room was cleaner than how she’d left it.

Just then, Kaede gasped. “Look!”

Following where she was pointing, Kirumi gasped as well.

There were flowers in the wall.

A small opening held a bouquet of different coloured flowers, all of different specimens. Kirumi saw purple, magenta, light pink, dark blue, and lots of other colours.

Both girls were baffled. Then, they noticed something else.

On the floor next to the flowers, there was a small note.

The handwriting was neat, and written in dark cyan. Kirumi read the note out loud.

 

Hello Kirumi,

Again, happy birthday! You might be wondering, what’s up with these flowers? Well, we’ll start by apologizing.

Monokuma got into your room and did so much damage, we panicked.

We were able to sort out everything else, but there was a hole in the wall.

Since we couldn’t cover it up, Kokichi had the idea of filling it with flowers!

Every person in the dorm has a flower that represents them, and the white and pink flowers are you and Kaede!

The flowers won’t last forever, though, so they’re just s placeholder until we can actually get the whole covered up.

We tried our best, we didn’t want to disturb you on your once day to relax. We appreciate everything you do for us!

Hope you had fun on your date!

-Shuichi

 

Turning the note around, Kirumi saw that the other side was covered in signatures.

Every student in the Harmony Dorm had signed it, in their favourite colour. All the signatures were different, and the handwriting varied. The handwriting seemed a perfect representation of the one who wrote it, from Miu’s being jagged and quick to Kaito’s unique way of dotting the i’s with stars.

Kaede, dumbfounded, stared at the flowers in awe. “Wow…” she commented. She turned to Kirumi, but grew concerned when she saw her girlfriend’s face.

Kirumi was crying.

Kirumi had always maintained a serious and dignified persona, refusing to crack under any kind of stress or emotion.

No matter the situation, no matter the problem, Kirumi looked on with a straight face.

Kaede had never seen her cry.

“Kirumi?” Kaede said, worried. But Kirumi looked back at her, smiling, eyes sparkling with tears.

“N-no one… has ever… acknowledged my service… l-like this…”

Kaede smiled, and wrapped her arms around Kirumi, who buried her face in Kaede’s hair.

“You deserve it. Happy birthday, sweet.”

Chapter Text

---Wednesday, May 3rd, 5:14am---

---Goodbye my Fucking Sanity---

 

 

boss baby kin’s edgy deviantart oc: hi everyone welcome to the Disney channel today im gonna fucking murder nagito komaeda

 

lemme kill myselfie: god finally

 

minion goblin: yay

 

does it LOOK like akane even WASHes her fucking hair: hhhhhhhnnnggg

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: god im so tired

 

hopesexual trash bag: understandable

 

choke on my ahoge: babe what did you do this time?

 

boss baby kin’s edgy deviantart oc: oh nothing much

 

boss baby kin’s edgy deviantart oc: he just

 

boss baby kin’s edgy deviantart oc: yknow

 

boss baby kin’s edgy deviantart oc: locked me and kaz in a fucking closet for the whole fucking night

 

sausage italiano: LMAO

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: i would key smash but im too tired

 

minion goblin: oh yeah speaking of smash

 

minion goblin: how was ur night with Sonia yesterday?? ;)

 

choke on my ahoge: what??

 

minion goblin: holy FUCK you are DUMB

 

minion goblin: there was a party last night??? im pretty sure every single couple ended up fucking???

 

eat shit and die: i highly doubt all couples ended up… doing it

 

does it LOOK like akane even WASHes her fucking hair: “doing it” what are you 7

 

lemme kill myselfie: hes right yknow

 

lemme kill myselfie: i don’t think peko and mikan did the do

 

stab me daddy: of course not. who do you take us for?

 

stab me daddy: mikan isn’t comfortable with that, and neither am i.

 

choke on my ahoge: i didn’t bring it up don’t blame me

 

choke on my ahoge: but i didn’t see any couples getting uh……. close

 

minion goblin: how??? it was so hard to miss tf

 

sausage italiano: well it happened near the end

 

sausage italiano: and

 

sausage italiano: i saw you drag nagito out of that gym hajime don’t act innocent

 

does it LOOK like akane even WASHes her fucking hair: YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

 

lemme kill myselfie: oh lord

 

lemme kill myselfie: im afraid to ask, but

 

lemme kill myselfie: …that’s what those noises were in the dorms last night???

 

hopesexual trash bag: no

 

hopesexual trash bag: we didn’t do it in the dorms

 

choke on my ahoge:   B   I   T   C  H

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: WOW YOU JUST… OPENLY CONFESED TO HAVING FUCKED LAST NIGHT

 

hopesexual trash bag: eh

 

choke on my ahoge: im gonna fling myself into the sun yeet

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: which classroom was it in

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: bls tell me it was biology so i have an excuse to never go in there again

 

hopesexual trash bag: it was a janitor’s closet i think

 

choke on my ahoge: hhholy shit nagito

 

lemme kill myselfie: okay but then what were those noises??

 

hopesexual trash bag: what do you think kazuichi and fuyuhiko were doing in that closet all night????

 

hopesexual trash bag: ;))

 

boss baby kin’s edgy deviantart oc: im gonna kill you for real

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: you little

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: nagito’s luck causes his predictions to be right almost 100% of the time………………………………….so

 

eat shit and die: oh my god

 

does it LOOK like akane even WASHes her fucking hair: haha

 

does it LOOK like akane even WASHes her fucking hair: this sucks, man

 

sausage italiano: who tops??

 

boss baby kin’s edgy deviantart oc: die you little bitch

 

sausage italiano: k so its definitely fuyuhiko

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: hajime can i fling myself into the sun along with you

 

choke on my ahoge: h

 

this is how we do things in my country is online

 

this is how we do things in my country: hello everyone!!!!!!!!

 

this is how we do things in my country: it is such a beautiful day today, isn’t it? just wonderful!!!! :3

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: ha

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: confirmed >:3

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: hhhhhhhhhhhhhh stop

 

sausage italiano: k so nagito and hajime, Sonia and chiaki, fuyuhiko and kazuichi

 

does it LOOK like akane even WASHes her fucking hair: are you keeping track????

 

minion goblin: ewwww perv!!!!

 

sausage italiano: oh im the pervert????

 

sausage italiano: seriously????

 

sausage italiano: OH COME ON NOW YALL WERE JUST TALKIN BOUT AND TRYNA GUESS WHO BEEN FUCKIN BUT ‘M THE ONLY ONE WHO’S WEIRD NOW IS IT??? YAINT FAIR

 

lemme kill myselfie: jesus

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: you’ve unleashed the beast

 

eat shit and die: even while texting, his southern accent comes out when hes angry??

 

hopesexual trash bag: or horny

 

hopesexual trash bag: most likely horny

 

sausage italiano: FUCKIN

 

sausage italiano went offline

 

minion goblin: finally

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: yes

 

choke on my ahoge: can we…. please change topics

 

choke on my ahoge: i really don’t feel comfortable talking about that so openly

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: i agree

 

hopesexual trash bag: oh…

 

hopesexual trash bag: im sorry, hajime :(

 

stab me daddy: however, I must say something.

 

stab me daddy: everyone was acting so… odd at the party yesterday.

 

stab me daddy: well, not everyone, just the couples, mostly.

 

does it LOOK like akane even WASHes her fucking hair: now that you mention it…

 

does it LOOK like akane even WASHes her fucking hair: i saw shuichi and kokichi getting uh……………… frisky on the wall of the gym

 

does it LOOK like akane even WASHes her fucking hair: some people were acting rlly loopy

 

eat shit and die: were they drunk?

 

Hamster Dance: Screamo Edition: there was only punch, and alcohol is forbidden on campus

 

Hamster Dance: Screamo Edition: this party was organized by the headmaster and other school authorities, why would they let underage students drink alcohol?

 

literally crying: maybe the punch was messed with?

 

Hamster Dance: Screamo Edition: …spiked?

 

does it LOOK like akane even WASHes her fucking hair: possibly??

 

boss baby kin’s edgy deviantart oc: couldn’t be

 

boss baby kin’s edgy deviantart oc: i don’t feel hungover, i just feel sorta… dazed

 

eat shit and die: you know what it feels like to be hungover??

 

boss baby kin’s edgy deviantart oc: h

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: not surprised

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: but yeah i feel the same way

 

choke on my ahoge: same

 

hopesexual trash bag: so do i!

 

lemme kill myselfie: that’s weird

 

lemme kill myselfie: i drank lots of punch but i felt just fine, yesterday and right now, im just tired but that’s cause we stayed up late

 

minion goblin: same here!

 

choke on my ahoge: …..

 

choke on my ahoge: …….

 

choke on my ahoge: oh

 

choke on my ahoge: o h  n o

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: what

 

choke on my ahoge: uhuhh,…

 

choke on my ahoge: i think i know what happened,,,,

 

Hamster Dance: Screamo Edition: what is it then?

 

choke on my ahoge: ill tell u later cause im not sure

 

choke on my ahoge: uh

 

choke on my ahoge: nagito lets switch topics

 

hopesexual trash bag: yep yep!!!!!!!!!!

 

hopesexual trash bag: lets talk about something else!!!

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: ANYWAYS

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: have you heard about chihiro’s new AI?

 

does it LOOK like akane even WASHes her fucking hair: ooooo sounds neat!

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: yeah its hella dope

 

boss baby kin’s edgy deviantart oc: never say that again or im leaving you

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: hhhnnnnngg

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: that went from 69 to 0 all the way up to 100 in a matter of seconds

 

choke on my ahoge: ffs

 

Imposter joined the chat

 

Ryota Mitarai joined the chat

 

does it LOOK like akane even WASHes her fucking hair: OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHH

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: THEY’VE ARRIVED

 

Ryota Mitarai: hello everybody!

 

this is how we do things in my country: hello, Ryota! :D

 

choke on my ahoge: finally decided to join the chat, eh, Imposter?

 

Imposter: yes, I have. I also invited Ryota to join.

 

Ryota Mitarai: you guys seemed to always be laughing while texting, so we wanted to join!

 

hopesexual trash bag: you know what this means?

 

hopesexual trash bag: it is time for

 

hopesexual trash bag: the initiation.

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: ryota, I’m assuming they are posing as Byakuya right now?

 

Imposter: indeed, so he/him pronouns are fine.

 

hopesexual trash bag: A H E M

 

hopesexual trash bag: I N I T I A T I O N

 

Ryota Mitarai: what do you mean, initiation?

 

minion goblin: oh no

 

minion goblin: you’ve made a big mistake

 

lemme kill myselfie: run for your fucking life

 

hopesexual trash bag: HHHHHHHHHHHHH

 

hopesexual trash bag changed Ryota Mitarai’s name to anime twink

 

hopesexual trash bag changed Imposter’s name to electric boogaloo

 

electric boogaloo: …electric boogaloo?

 

hopesexual trash bag: just look it up

 

anime twink: ….thanks nagito

 

hopesexual trash bag: you…… appreciate the name i gave?

 

anime twink: its not incredible, but its not horrible

 

electric boogaloo: agreed. it is the same for me.

 

hopesexual trash bag: …

 

hopesexual trash bag: wwowo tthnaks

 

choke on my ahoge: y

 

choke on my ahoge: you made him cry

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: nah, hes fine

 

choke on my ahoge: no, seriously

 

choke on my ahoge: hes just… staring at the ceiling and crying

 

eat shit and die: …well then

 

boss baby kin’s edgy deviantart oc: yikes

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: are you in the same room?

 

choke on my ahoge: yeah

 

minion goblin: hmmmmmmmmmmm i wonder why ;)))))))

 

choke on my ahoge: oh for fu

 

choke on my ahoge: we are not starting with this again

 

minion goblin: eep

 

electric boogaloo: anyways, why are you all on here?

 

electric boogaloo: it’s 5 am. we barely got any sleep because of the party. aren’t you tired?

 

boss baby kin’s edgy deviantart oc: bitch im always tired

 

lemme kill myselfie: same

 

minion goblin: same

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: same

 

hopesexual trash bag: sssame

 

choke on my ahoge: same

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: same

 

eat shit and die: same

 

anime twink: wow aren’t you all just rays of sunshine

 

minion goblin: ryota need I remind you of the time you tripped while running in gym class and instead of trying to get up you just lied there, face first on the pavement and said “im so tired of being alive”

 

does it LOOK like akane even WASHes her fucking hair: mood

 

boss baby kin’s edgy deviantart oc: mood

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: mood

 

minion goblin: mood

 

electric boogaloo: DON’T START WITH THIS AGAIN

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: ANYWAYS, to answer ur question

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: we were discussing the party yesterday

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: how all the couples were acting rlly weird :PP

 

electric boogaloo: oh, you mean because of the aphrodisiacs?

 

lemme kill myselfie: th

 

lemme kill myselfie: the W H A T

 

does it LOOK like akane even WASHes her fucking hair: WAITWAITWAITWAIT

 

choke on my ahoge: I KNEW IT

 

Hamster Dance: Screamo Edition: …ah, that makes sense.

 

eat shit and die: HOLD ON A SECOND WH

 

this is how we do things in my country: what?

 

literally crying: HHUH

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: oh, i get it

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: so i guess the reason it only affected certain couples was because it took advantage of the sexual tension?

 

electric boogaloo: wait, you didn’t know?

 

electric boogaloo: I spoke with Kyoko last night

 

electric boogaloo: she had immediately figured it out

 

eat shit and die: that’s not surprising

 

*SSCHLLLLLORRP* mm i love lollipops joined the chat

 

*SSCHLLLLLORRP* mm i love lollipops: hi im gonna kill each and every single one of you

 

choke on my ahoge: woah woah wait

 

choke on my ahoge: …ruruka???

 

minion goblin: jesus why is the loyalty dorm invading our chat

 

anime twink: ruruka! why are you here?

 

*SSCHLLLLLORRP* mm i love lollipops: which one of you stole the aphrodisiacs from seiko’s lab????

 

hopesexual trash bag: oh

 

hopesexual trash bag: hiyoko did

 

minion goblin: HEY WHAT THE FUCK

 

*SSCHLLLLLORRP* mm i love lollipops: i knew it

 

*SSCHLLLLLORRP* mm i love lollipops: ur going down bitch

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: hey quit it!!!

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: you cant fight a 2 year old!!!!!

 

minion goblin: FIRST OF ALL FUCK YOU

 

minion goblin: SECOND OF ALL

 

minion goblin: I DIDN’T STEAL ANYTHING

 

Hamster Dance: Screamo Edition: but it was you who stole the aphrodisiacs last time and snuck it into the lunch Teruteru made, was it not?

 

minion goblin: WELL…….. YEAH

 

minion goblin: BUT IT WASN’T ME THIS TIME I SWEAR

 

minion goblin: I WASN’T EVEN AWARE SEIKO EVEN HAD MORE APHRODISIACS

 

lemme kill myselfie: i don’t think it was her

 

lemme kill myselfie: she was as surprised as i was when we learned about the aphrodisiacs

 

*SSCHLLLLLORRP* mm i love lollipops: h

 

*SSCHLLLLLORRP* mm i love lollipops: fine fine

 

*SSCHLLLLLORRP* mm i love lollipops: so WHO was it???

 

Hamster Dance: Screamo Edition: likely, the same person who stole them is the one who spiked the punch with it, yes?

 

eat shit and die: makes sense

 

minion goblin: it was probably kokichi, the little shit

 

stab me daddy: not likely

 

stab me daddy: he drank the punch as well, why would he drink it if he knew what would happen?

 

hopesexual trash bag: yeah also he n shuichi ended up fucking soo

 

*SSCHLLLLLORRP* mm i love lollipops: seiko’s panicking she thinks the whole spiked punch incident was her fault

 

literally crying: oh nno! D:

 

*SSCHLLLLLORRP* mm i love lollipops: but whats weird is

 

*SSCHLLLLLORRP* mm i love lollipops: she always locks the door to her lab when she leaves to prevent this exact thing from happening

 

*SSCHLLLLLORRP* mm i love lollipops: if the door to her lab is unlocked, it means she’s inside

 

*SSCHLLLLLORRP* mm i love lollipops: she has the only key, its impossible to get inside without the keys

 

*SSCHLLLLLORRP* mm i love lollipops: AND

 

*SSCHLLLLLORRP* mm i love lollipops: the aphrodisiacs is stored in a refrigerator locked by a passcode that only she knows

 

*SSCHLLLLLORRP* mm i love lollipops: soo….. it’s unbelievable that someone was able to get it

 

this is how we do things in my country: how odd!

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: …

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: …

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: monokuma did it

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: huh????

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: obviously

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: we know he can control doors when he locked ryoma in his room

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: hes above the law

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: also putting aphrodisiacs in the punch is exactly the kind of prank he’d pull

 

boss baby kin’s edgy deviantart oc: …holy shit

 

minion goblin: kazuichi said something smart!!!!!!! HOLY FUCK!!!!

 

*SSCHLLLLLORRP* mm i love lollipops: thnx kaz

 

*SSCHLLLLLORRP* mm i love lollipops: im gonna go fight monokuma brb

 

Usami Two: The Squeakquel joined the chat

 

Usami Two: The Squeakquel: ahaha.,,,,,, please don’t

 

choke on my ahoge: well well well lookie who it is

 

Usami Two: The Squeakquel: okaokay BEFORE YOU KILL ME

 

Usami Two: The Squeakquel: i just wanna say two things

 

Usami Two: The Squeakquel: 1: ur welcome for giving you couples a good time

 

Usami Two: The Squeakquel: ;)

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: ugh

 

Usami Two: The Squeakquel: 2

 

Usami Two: The Squeakquel: this prank was approved by the headmaster!!!

 

electric boogaloo: ….what

 

anime twink: WHAT

 

boss baby kin’s edgy deviantart oc: YOU WHAT

 

does it LOOK like akane even WASHes her fucking hair: WWHWHWHWAIT

 

eat shit and die: WHAT THE SHIT?????????

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: WHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAT??????

 

Usami Two: The Squeakquel: wow this is like the opening to thrift shop by Macklemore

 

Usami Two: The Squeakquel: but yeah!!!

 

Usami Two: The Squeakquel: Jin said the prank was harmless

 

Usami Two: The Squeakquel: and allowed me to do it

 

Usami Two: The Squeakquel: IN EXCHANGE

 

Usami Two: The Squeakquel: FOR SOMETHING

 

lemme kill myselfie: im afraid to ask

 

minion goblin: fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck

 

choke on my ahoge: just….. spit it out

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: what is it then????????????!!

 

Usami Two: The Squeakquel: i have to teach homeroom for 1 month

 

Usami Two: The Squeakquel: AND oversee exams!!!

 

boss baby kin’s edgy deviantart oc: FFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK

 

Usami Two: The Squeakquel: you fuckers aint getting rid of me!!!!!!

 

eat shit and die: SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT

 

does it LOOK like akane even WASHes her fucking hair: GOD DAMMIT

 

choke on my ahoge: THIS SEEMS LESS LIKE A PUNISHMENT FOR YOU AND MORE LIKE A PUNISHMENT FOR US

 

*SSCHLLLLLORRP* mm i love lollipops: oh no

 

*SSCHLLLLLORRP* mm i love lollipops: welp im out goodbye

 

*SSCHLLLLLORRP* mm i love lollipops has left the chat

 

anime twink: uhm

 

anime twink: so

 

anime twink: yeet

 

anime twink has left the group chat

 

electric boogaloo: this betrayal,,

 

Usami Two: The Squeakquel: anyways i gtg!

 

Usami Two: The Squeakquel: see you in homero

 

literally crying kicked Usami Two: The Squeakquel from the chat

 

stab me daddy: well done, mikan :)

 

literally crying: :)

 

minion goblin: goddamn that’s cold

 

minion goblin: anyways im going to sleep bye

 

lemme kill myselfie: ….

 

lemme kill myselfie: FUCK

 

lemme kill myselfie: FUCKFUCK FUCK

 

hopesexual trash bag: WHAT NOW>????????

 

lemme kill myselfie: ITS 8

 

lemme kill myselfie: WE ONLY HAVE AN HOUR BEFORE CLASS STARTS

 

boss baby kin’s edgy deviantart oc: OH NO

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: OH NOOOOOOOOOO

 

does it LOOK like akane even WASHes her fucking hair: AND WE HAVE MONOKUMA FOR HOMEROOM

 

minion goblin: fuck it

 

minion goblin: im sleeping anyways

 

literally crying: but, hiyoko!

 

minion goblin: fuck alla yall goodnight

 

 

 

---Wednesday, May 3rd, 8:03am---

---The Old Fucks, the Demon Babies and the Talentless Trio---

 

*SSCHLLLLLORRP* mm i love lollipops: hi

 

*SSCHLLLLLORRP* mm i love lollipops: i come bearing bad news

 

makoto nijima: that’s just how it is on this bitch of an earth

 

super high school level dumbass: ah yes spouting emo bullshit at 8 in the morning

 

makoto nijima: suck my ass

 

super high school level dumbass: suck my ass

 

team mom: don’t say that in front of the children!!!

 

holy shit its fucking kirishima bnha: you better not be talking abt me

 

holy shit its fucking kirishima bnha: im only two grades lower than you but i will fight you

 

hatsune pinku: same but i wont fight you

 

hatsune pinku: ill just stare at you passive aggressively and when you ask whats wrong ill say nothing

 

anime twink: STOP

 

pugs not drugs: hhhhnnnng

 

pugs not drugs: rruruka whats the bad news? D:

 

*SSCHLLLLLORRP* mm i love lollipops: so i just infiltrated the Super Dorm Chat

 

*SSCHLLLLLORRP* mm i love lollipops: which, by the way, is very bad

 

*SSCHLLLLLORRP* mm i love lollipops: and it turns out it wasn’t any of them that stole the aphrodisiacs

 

*SSCHLLLLLORRP* mm i love lollipops: but it was actually monokuma

 

briarlight: I KNEW IT

 

briarlight: WHAT DID I SAY

 

briarlight: listen it was totally obvious

 

Ultimate Little Sister: ugh that stupid bear again

 

super high school level dumbass: okokok

 

super high school level dumbass: BUT

 

super high school level dumbass: pls confirm this for me ruruka

 

super high school level dumbass: did my brother end up fucking that pink haired mother fucker

 

*SSCHLLLLLORRP* mm i love lollipops: hm?

 

*SSCHLLLLLORRP* mm i love lollipops: oh yeah lol

 

super high school level dumbass: gggsgggdgdggd

 

makoto nijima: yay natsumi is dead

 

makoto nijima: i killed her

 

wow its bakugo bnha: technically, it was fuyuhiko and kazuichi that killed her

 

makoto nijima: I ghost killed her

 

super high school level dumbass: quit telling people im dead!

 

makoto nijima: sometimes,,,, i can still hear her voice,,,,,

 

you can naruto run but you cant naruto hide: hey hey

 

you can naruto run but you cant naruto hide: so monokuma spiked the punch

 

you can naruto run but you cant naruto hide: but is that really bad news?? we already knew the punch was spiked

 

you can naruto run but you cant naruto hide: so whats the real bad news?

 

*SSCHLLLLLORRP* mm i love lollipops: i was gonna get to that

 

*SSCHLLLLLORRP* mm i love lollipops: before i was INTERRUPTED,

 

*SSCHLLLLLORRP* mm i love lollipops: the headmaster gave him the permission to pull that prank

 

i hate this fucking family: HHHHH????????

 

briarlight: ….why

 

*SSCHLLLLLORRP* mm i love lollipops: in exchange for 2 things

 

wow its bakugo bnha: i don’t think im gonna like this

 

*SSCHLLLLLORRP* mm i love lollipops: he has to oversee end of the year exams

 

i hate this fucking family: UGH

 

you can naruto run but you cant naruto hide: ohno

 

wow its bakugo bnha: frick

 

hatsune pinku: i don’t deserve this

 

holy shit its fucking kirishima bnha: DANGIT

 

team mom: NO FUCKING SWEARING YOU’RE JUST A CHILD

 

takeout sashimi yucky maroo: kanon,,,,,,

 

briarlight: honestly? could be worse

 

pugs not drugs: yyeah :(

 

makoto nijima: wait, you said there were two things??

 

makoto nijima: whats the other thing?

 

*SSCHLLLLLORRP* mm i love lollipops: oh yeah

 

*SSCHLLLLLORRP* mm i love lollipops: he has to teach homeroom for a month

 

pickle monaca: h

 

pickle monaca: wait

 

pickle monaca: he what

 

i hate this fucking family: welp

 

i hate this fucking family: good luck monaca

 

takeout sashimi yucky maroo: LMAO

 

pickle monaca: WAIT

 

pickle monaca: FRICK FRICK FRICK

 

pickle monaca: THAT’S MY FAVOURITE CLASS HE CANT D

 

holy shit its fucking kirishima bnha: rest in spaghetti,,,,

 

hatsune pinku: never forgetti,,,,

 

pickle monaca: SHUT UP

 

pickle monaca: I CNT BELIEVE THIS

 

michealangelo ninja turtles: guys we’re gonna be late

 

you can naruto run but you cant naruto hide: oh shoot

 

you can naruto run but you cant naruto hide: yeet bye

 

you can naruto run but you cant naruto hide went offline

 

pickle monaca: DON’T JUST LEAVE ME TO SUFFER

 

pickle monaca: @everyone

 

1 person is online

 

pickle monaca: I HATE YOU ALL

Chapter Text

---Friday, June 1st, 1:01am---

 

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: GUESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS WHAT FFFFFFFFFFFFFUCKING MMMMMMMMONTH IT IS

 

vorekiyo shingucci: it’s midnight, so it is technically june. right?

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: YEP

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: U KNOW WHAT THAT MEAAAANSSSS

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: PRIDE MONTH MOTHER FUCKER

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: HEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL FUCKINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNG YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH

 

kaegay: NICE NICE

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep is online

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: GUYS PRIDE MONTH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: WAIT

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

 

nyahh :3: oh man kokichi just beat tenko to announcing pride month

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: IMPOSSIBLE

 

freeshovacadoo: big homosexual vs big lesbian

 

freeshovacadoo: uhh whats the opposite of solidarity

 

freeshovacadoo: mlm/wlw disagreement

 

freeshovacadoo: discord

 

freeshovacadoo: divorce????

 

whattup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: its ok take ur time

 

naruto is my senpai: are we all here?

 

naruto is my senpai: @everyone

 

9 people are online

 

ass ass in is online

 

ass ass in: you better have a valid excuse for having woken me up this early

 

kaegay: PRIDE MONTHHHH

 

ass ass in: ah. understandable

 

mother hates all of you but kaede is online

 

yaint goin tuh heaven is online

 

holy fuck its sans undertale is online

 

instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster is online

 

i stuck my dick in an anthill once is online

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu is online

 

naruto is my senpai: that’s everybody!!!

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: whyd you need to wake us up? *yawn* its so early…

 

nyahh :3: d

 

nyahh :3: did you just yawn over text

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: himiko ive literally watched you write essays and type in *yawn* every time you yawned while writing

 

nyahh :3: shush

 

naruto is my senpai: to answer your question, I’m making pride stuff for everyone!

 

naruto is my senpai: bandanas, ties, tshirts, scarves, hoodies yadda yadda

 

naruto is my senpai: i need yall to tell me what flag and what item you want!!

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: …at 1am?

 

naruto is my senpai: yeah well I wont rlly have time to talk with you guys since we separate a lot and since we all here i thought why not!!!

 

naruto is my senpai: okay so…. start with kokichi

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: i want a gay flag bandana. gay glasses. gay pants. gay shirt. gay hat. g

 

naruto is my senpai: i don’t have time for all of that but ill do the bandana!

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: okokk coolcool

 

vorekiyo shingucci: fresh out of the closet look

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: JSHGAKJHGFDTYUJHSGFDRTAYUJHGFDSZ

 

naruto is my senpai: shuichi!

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: bi flag scarf plz

 

naruto is my senpai: hell yeah my man

 

naruto is my senpai: keebo!

 

instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster: ah, well, i’d appreciate an agender scarf, if possible :)

 

naruto is my senpai: you got it! miu?

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: YOU ALREADY KNOW WHAT TF GOING ON

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: PANSEXUAL CROP TOP BABEYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

 

naruto is my senpai: NICENICE

 

naruto is my senpai: ryoma?

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: gay/ace flag scarf, if you can do two in one

 

naruto is my senpai: ofc!

 

naruto is my senpai: tenko wbu

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: do you even have to ask

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: lesbian/trans tshirt BLZ

 

nyahh :3: valid valid valid valid

 

naruto is my senpai: and himiko?

 

nyahh :3: lesbian/ace tshirt :))

 

naruto is my senpai: yepyep

 

naruto is my senpai: angie!

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: i will be matching with miu! :D

 

naruto is my senpai: k!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: hell yes power couple

 

naruto is my senpai: kaitoooo

 

whattup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: hmmmmmmmm,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, bi tshirt

 

naruto is my senpai: goodgood!! kaede!

 

kaegay: HHH

 

kaegay: lesbian shirt bich

 

naruto is my senpai: hell ye

 

naruto is my senpai: mom

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: the same.

 

naruto is my senpai: ha gay

 

naruto is my senpai: hey maki

 

ass ass in: bi scarf

 

naruto is my senpai: ok! gonta!

 

i stuck my dick in an anthill once: ah, gonta not sure… gonta does not understand all the flags. but gonta loves everybody!

 

naruto is my senpai: ah, i understand!

 

naruto is my senpai: hmmm

 

naruto is my senpai: how about a pan scarf? :D

 

i stuck my dick in an anthill once: ok! :D

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: pure

 

naruto is my senpai: oi gucci

 

vorekiyo shingucci: pan bandana, please.

 

naruto is my senpai: yepyep! rantaro?

 

naruto is my senpai: would you like a gay tshirt? :33

 

freeshovacadoo: would I?!

 

naruto is my senpai: would you?

 

freeshovacadoo: would I?!

 

naruto is my senpai: would you?

 

freeshovacadoo: W  O  U  L  D    I  ?  !

 

naruto is my senpai:   W̷̢̬͉̅ ̶̤̳̽̌͠ ̴̹̓ ̶̼̫̠͍̈́ ̷̹̉̉̈́ ̸̡̜̌͊̽̚ ̷͈̺͙̈̋ͅ ̶̻̋͝ ̴̡̛̤̐͆͑ͅ ̵̱̱̙̳̂ ̸͕̣̔͆̚ ̸̡̛͇̫͛̒O̷̡̜͇̍̈́͘ ̵̪̹͛̔ ̶̠̓ͅ ̸̜̰͍̈́̊ ̶̨̜̜͖̄́͝ ̵͖̰͚̋ ̵̢̛̠̯̱̍ ̷̰͖̰̐͊͛͊ ̴̼̑̈́̐ ̶͍͕̘̒͌̈́ ̶͇͇̅́̉̒ ̸̼̠̐ ̷̮͐̊̆͘ ̵̻̟̅̂ ̵͍̣̘̋͂͜ ̵̧̛̺͉͆̾͗ ̶̞̋U̵̮͕̕ ̷͖̞̾̓ ̶̧̣̑́̈́̚ ̸̡͉͓̺̑ ̴̧̠̮̓͜͝͝ ̵̘̭̊ ̴̹̣̇ ̷̰͕͉̞̓̌͠ ̶͎̅͐ ̶̣̻̯̦̇̾̈̎ ̵̠͕̓̏̎̍ ̶̦̥͇̣͗͒ ̷̨͉̻̕ ̴̭̳̅̽͘͝ ̵̞̩̝͓̇͒͂L̸̨̳͈̏͆̇͜ ̶̛̲̈́̒̓ ̴̥̜̆͑͆ ̶̱͆͐̃̿ ̴̥͔̽͆̔ ̵̧̗̬̝̌̀̈́̌ ̶͓ ̷̨̒ ̵͖̟̏͗̀ ̷̨̪̘͊ ̷̱̳̥̓̇̈̚ ̴͈̝͐ ̶̪̝͙͑ ̷̡͔͎͍̅͘ ̸̖̪͖̐̕͜D̷͎̲̈̏̑̚ ̴̛̣ ̶͚̩̈́͋͠ ̴̜̱̈́́ͅ ̶̢͎͑ ̶̝̫̿̚ ̷͚̪̖̉̆ ̴͖̈ ̵̼̩̫͉̓͝ ̷͓̭͔̎̌̓͑ͅ ̴̟̪͔̖̍̆̚ ̴̫ ̵̺͔̹̼̐͛ ̶̧͙̘̮̂͘ ̸̼̬͍̉͝ ̵̠̩̱͕̾̏ ̶̧̮̺́͆ ̸͓̟̹͍̍ ̴̣̳̯̙̏̈́̽́ ̸̦̯̀ ̷͖͍̓ ̵̖͎̦̻̿ ̶̱̹͒̎͝ ̶͈̬͔̎͌͝ ̴̢̨͚̀ ̷̤͂̌̇ ̵̮̮̔́̒̃ ̷͈̼͗̎̑̑ ̸̪̣̄́̃̌͜Y̴̭͍̹͌ ̶̢̭̹̃͘͝ ̷͍̻͔̠̓͒͐́ ̵̤̍͜ ̸̬̾ ̷̹͋̉̊ ̶̠̠̕ ̴̡͚̰̬͂̓ ̶͖͋͋͐ ̵̨̛̲̥͐͊͝ ̴̜̗͇̓́ ̴̯̉͋͂ ̴̙̲̰̟̿ ̸̳͚̥̄̉͘ ̸̭̈́ ̸̤̱̲̑͗̃̿ ̶̧̣͕̅̔̓͑ ̶̨̨̯̞͌O̷̩̊̆ ̴̪͇͐ ̴̡͑̒̋͝ ̶̢̎ ̵̧̨̲̝͐͋̓̃ ̴̛͕̤̖̾̃͂ ̶̟́̉̚ ̷͙̎̉͘͝ ̵̧̡͉̟͛̆͒̀ ̷̼̳̼͘ ̴̲̹̱̿͜ ̸̗͉̽̄̄ ̷͈̆̊̂ ̴̧̞͓͊̚ ̵̡͘͜ ̸̗̝͉͗̍̈́̃ ̵̥̾̈ ̶̡̮͙̓ ̸̗͍̟̀̐̅ ̷̳̆̏ ̸̻͂̑͒͜͜ ̴̧̻̠̓͒̋̇ ̷̯͈͆̏̅̄ ̵̫̰̃͜ ̶̘̣͉̊͒ͅU̵̳̠̽̚ ̷̢̙͊̉ ̸̰̞̉̋̄͜ ̵̨̹̬͎̍͊͘?̵͓͛̈́͛

 

freeshovacadoo: W̸̡̧̢̧̨̼̫̠̫͓̣̜̱͈̩̗̲̰̲̺̤̻̝̹̳͕̮͚̻̗͉̦͚̣̰͓̰̫̬̲̗̠͎̜̘͍̞̪̤̜̳̭̲̤͑̉̍͒͌͌͂̊̕͘͜͜͜͜͝ ̴̡̢̨̨̨̢̛̖̗͇̯̗̤̺̦̪̠̘̗͓̼͔̝͕͍̜̮̳̤̗̩̦̯̱̰͉̰͎̭̭͓̳̰̙̻͎̳̑͗̇̊̈́̓͋̂͊̏͐̋̎̍̈́̌͂̑̈́̾͐̑̈́͌͗̄̉̄͋̀̌͗̔̀̌͒͐͑͛͒̀̅̀̃͐̔̃́̓̌̑̈́͒̒̈́̇̒͑͗̅͒͒̅̕̚͘̕͘͜͝͝͝͝͝͠ͅ ̷̛̤͉̣̬͙̞̝̻͓͖̺̺͔̙̘̩̹̑̆̏̀́͊̌̀͋̈̿̆͊̍͊̂̕̚͝ͅ ̶̡̧̨̧̧̨̛̛̣̦͍̪̘̻̮̭͉̤͔̮̰̬͚͓̣̰̻̺͎̮̺̩̬̻͍͚͖͇͕̠͔̪̖̤͍̟̩̜̗̻̥͈̮̫͉͔̻̯̬̪̋̔̽͒̏̃͋͌̈́̉̃̾̿̾̉̂̒͛̔̃̏̈́͋͛́̌́̒̒͆̔̑̅̊͆̄̓̇̓͌͘̕̚͜͜͜͝͝͝͝͝ͅͅͅ ̶̨̢̧̢̢̢̧̨̧̧̛̭̱͔͈̠͓͈͚̬͖͓̩̫̲̬̘͙̝̼͈͍̰̘͍̟̥͚͓̰̼̺͓̤̫̬̦̠̯̝̮͖͔̝̲̣̫͉̞̩̤̜̻̌͑͗͒̔̂͋̃̔̉̈́͌̅̓̈̂͋̍͐͂̕̚͘͘̚͘͘͜͠͝ͅͅ ̷̧̨̢̢̡̛̻͎̘͍̲͎̱̤̠̻̙̯͓̺̠͚̰̱͕͙̪͓͎̹̜̳̜̗͍͎͔̯͉̩͕͓̗͖͙͉͑̄̓̿̃͊̊͆̌̌͐̄̔͋̄̏͑̾͋͂̌̔͒̈́̿̐̉̉̎̎͌͛̎̉͋̓̐̄̽̌̍̾̌̃̎͑̾̄̾̊͆͘̚̚̕͘͜͠͝͠ͅͅ ̷̨̛͉͈͔̜̮̘̜̲͎̩͔̟͖̰̖̰͈̤̘͕̻̭̝̗̱͇̞̖͙̭͉͓̹̣̟̲̻̫͉̤̖͖͇͕͖̬͕̠͙̲̞͙̹͈̗̫͍͓̑̐̋͂̅͋̏̎̋̄̈́͂͋̏̈̓̉̽͑͗͋͗͗͗̀̎̂͋̓͛̽̔̀̇̇̄̒̈͌́̒̎̑͒̏͘͘̕̚͜͝͠͠͝͠͝͝ͅ ̷̨̨̧̨̡̨̨̢̧̨̧̛̛̛̖͚̥̳̝̪̻͕̝̪͉͍̝̤̰̳̬̹͍͈͓̻̫̞̭͎̜̻̗̝̦͕͇̺͔͙͇̳̩̙̺̯͎̘̞͉̠͍̬͚̻̰̥̤̮̝̣̪̋̾͋͛̉̇͗͒͐̓͊͒̈́̾͆́͗̎̄̂̿́̆̿̎̋̍̀̂̀̓̈́͌͑̌͐̒̈́̈͑̚͠͝͝͠͝ ̵̭̘̺̩̙̟̠̼̖̤̫͈̞̖̖͕͈̜̤̜͇͎̅̓͌̓͜͜͠ ̴̧̢͙̻͓͕̩̗͈̦̱̣͈͔̗͔̩̜̝͔̜̪̠̯̲͕̱͔̮̤̹̰̳̱̺͗̃͋̆͛̈́͌̊͒̿̋̈́̏͂̅̔͊̃̅͑̐̾̈́̓̂͊̐͗̆̓͘̚̚͘͜͜͜͠͠ ̷̧̡̛̼͎̰̗̞̤̟͖͇̼̹̜̜̗̹̱͎̳̜̞̺̺̻͖̗̲̱͓̘̞̱̯̺̺͍̮͈͍̝͕͔͔̫͔̗̜̬̳̮̏́̐̔̈́̅͌̇̄̓͗̈̇͋́̋̈́̊͌̆͛͑͘̚̚̕͘̚̚͜͜͜͜͝͠͝͝ͅ ̸̧̧̜̹̲̭͔̠̫̮̠̰̲̆̓͒̆̍̓̍̈̅͑̐́̓̔͌̌̕͜͝͝ͅO̴̡̨̡̧̢̧̧̡̡͇̣̦̮̭͓͉̦̥̮͓͕̯̫̬̼̻͖̞̹̣̜͔̣̯̣̲̲̪̯̲̳͈̮̙̠̻̻̩̬͍͈͚̹̦̘̣͚̹̼̙̤͚̬̠̠̫̯͈͕͙̝̭̔͛̏̇̐̈́̃̉̐̃̍͛̀̈́͆̽͊̿̓͐͗̏̈́̓͑͐̍͑͘͜͜ͅ ̸̡̨̧̡̢̛͖̗̬̹̻̭̗͕͔̭̦͚̼͖̱̙̠͈̲̼̭͖̥̳̲͈̻̮̮̹̼͚͎̪͕͖͍̳̮̠̠͔̖̱̜̺̼̼̫̰̟͔̳̯͈̲͇͂͗͒̒̾͌̋͛̑̋̌̋͐̈̈́͐̈́̋̓͆͐͋̿͛͐͊͐̀̂́͊̍͒͂̏͘͘͜͝͠ ̶̨̧̧̨̛̛̲̹̣̖̗̼̙͈̠͔̼̞͓̯̳̦̖̱͐͌͒͗̈́͋̽̄̽͒̌̉̌̇͂͋͋̓̈́͂͂̾̋̅̃͑̑̾̿̾̓̾͂͛͆̓̌́͂̚͜͜͠͠͠͝͝ ̷̢̨̨̤̩̪̺̗͍̤̣̦̰͇̬̥͕̮͇͉͖̤͚͉̦̫͖̞̺͖̦̼̣̘̲͙̬͖̜̺͔̯̞̐̊̅͑̈́̈́́͛͆̀̋͑̓̇̎̉̃̉͘̚͜͜͜͝͝ͅ ̵̢̡̧̧̧̡̢̛̛͙̘̤̜̞̬̜͎̺̱̖̬͇̙͍̯̟̭̪͍͔̜̜͈͚͖̲͇̫͔̜͖̖̺͇̭̯̮̯͙̠͚̱͉͍̗̭͍̮̄͊͊̏́̏̉́͐̒̉̽̄̿͌͂͋̀̈́̃̃͑͒̈́̈̍͋̍̓̇͂̆͒̇̋͋̒̾̃̽̓͗͒̍͊̾̂̂̇̌̂͛̍̔̐͊̚̚͘̚͜͝͝͠ ̸̨̢̨̢̢̡̢̗͔̞͈̯̣̯̣̰͇̖̝͖̺̩̬̗̘̭͓̹͕̘͓̤̣̦̣̻̮͖̲̫̩̠͕͓̣̦̦͎̝̯̼̣͚̰̖͍̪̺͓̣̣̹͍̓͒̓̏͜͝ͅ ̶̨̡͇̗͓͔̦͍̩̀̃̄̓̌̎̾̂̿̉̾̓̂̿̈́̌̽͌̔̈́͒̎̒̽͒͐̓̉̇̅̂̅͒̋͌̑͌͗̾̑̈́͐̐́̑̅͗̆̈́̓̿̿͆͆̐̓̍͊̏͊͒̔̈́̐͘̚͘̕̚͜͝͝͠͠ͅ ̶̨̨̛̛̻͇̹͇͇̩̗͚̗͍͕̪̝͖̖̫̯̙̯͎̠̜̻̎̿͂͐͌̄̎̓̊͆̄̉̔̀̈́̓̅̽͊̓͊̒͗̓́̂̒̆̎̑̍̓͑͗̈́̂̿͌̽͌͂̿̑͊̾̋̀̾͆̃̌̉̄̅͘̕͘̚̚͝͝͠͠͠͝ ̶͖̙͈͈͉̻̪̺͔̪͙̼̖̝̜̩͚̞͕̺̤̖̰̱̭̜̺̼̭̦̦͕̭̑̓͌̐̾͐̈́͑̇̀̍̍̈́͗́̈͗̋̔̎͋͊̿̽̅̋͐͗̂́̔̃̅̃̎̃̈́̇̂̏̽̑̈́͋̉́̉̉̍̑̆́̀͗̽̓͑̐̏̉̕͘̚͘̕͝͠ͅ ̸̧̨̛̱̺̳̞͓̳̯̬̗̦̖͔̤̙̘̭̼͔͕̫͖̞̳͆̃͐̓̉̿̊̈́̈̃͗͂͑̏͋͋̐̿͐̑̚̕͠ͅ ̵̡̧̧̧̛̱̱͇͖͍̗̙͚̩̗͈̠̥͎̘̪̯̮̳̺̭̯̠̭͇̪̯̯̦̟͙̩͈̩͇͕̜͔̖̺̘̜̣̬̙̪͈͎̮͙̐̓̎͊̇̽̍̾͗̉̈́̎̌̅̒̓͑̈́́͋̃̾͊͑͋̓͊̾̋̓̊̌̀̽̂̍͂̇̌͑̀͐͒͌̂͗̐̅̈̆̃́́̉͌͊͋͆͛̅͊̑̀͂̚͘̚͜͜͜͜͝͝͝ͅ ̸̧̬͔̤̹͓̮̻͕̪͎̘͍̱̮̘̘̭̖̻̲̖̍̾̈́͑̉̓͋̅͐̈̆̒̊͗̋̌͗͗͂̇̋̒̾͐͆̇̓͋̕̚̕͜͝͠͝͝ͅ ̴̡̡̡̡̢̨̨̧̢̡̨̙̞̫̰̼̲̠͚̱̖̠̺͙͍̮̤̜̭̼̗̞̟̱̲̜͔͎̰̲̩̜̗̩̲̼͖̻͎̹̲̤̺̞͇̝̝̭͇̤̼̩̺̣̳͓͈̙͌̓͛̀͋̋̂̍͒͛̈͊̓̈̓͑̿͋͗̈̏̿̀̅̿͗̈́̊̀̐̀́͛͆̽͊͆̔̎̈́̅̍̈́͊͆̅̌͗̅̅͛̈́̆͑̓͒̌͋̋̒̌͋̋͆͗͌̆̃͘͘͘̚͜͜͝͝͝͝͝ͅͅ ̴̛̛͕̻͖̠̯̭̳̖̩̩͖̝̩̥͎͑̐̽͗̄̍͛͑͌̾̐̀̀̾͊̌͌̅̐̽̒͋́͐͌̅͒́̈́̈́̅̍̆͘̚̚͘͝ ̴̧̢̨̬̫͇͈͓͍͍̹̼̟͈̘͕̝̘͉̹͖̤͉̹͎͙̠͔̳̮̟̏̑̾̎̃̋̏̆͂́́̆̾̊̄͗̋͆̽͊̈́͗̄̈̀̍̇̇̿̌̐̋̆̋͂͗̀̏̊͊͐̆͋̑̈́̉̚̕̚͝͠͠͝ ̴̡̨̨̛̼̺̤̟̱̝̣̲̫͉̯̜̟̗̜̖̝̲̞̟͉͖̻̘̮̫͎̈́̀̽͗̋̑̌̎̌͐̽̽͒̀͐͋̄̃̋͆̎͗̃̽̏͂̇̒̀͊͛̾̌̀̏̏̽̏͆̂̈́͐̏̃́̃́̉̈́͂̌̀͐̓̇͆͂̽̕͘͘̕̕̚͘̕̕͘̚͜͝͝͠͝͝͠ ̶̥͖̝͎͓̱̣̟̒̿͐͘Ư̴̡̡̡͖̗̺̺̺̺̼̗͍̖̲̬̺͇͖͓͓̟͕̭̟̜̭̗̬̗͎̺͖̱̠̗̪̞̘̺̳̲͚̝̣͔̖̗̫̪̫̱̣̜͍͉̞̲̼̠̣̺̰̳̦͍͔͚̫̩͈̥͉͉͉̙̟̈͂͑̈́̂̔̾̅͗̉̓̒̈́̾̄̔̑͊̈̃̋̋͂̈́̑̌̽̎̒͋͛̄͆͗̌̉̅̈͑̓̈͛̑͛̎̅̆̍̊̋́̎͒́̍̈́̓̏̈́͘̚̚͘͠͝͠ͅͅ ̸̡̧̢̛̛̛͖͇͙̤̩͈͚̘͔̼͍̹͍͙͔̰̗̞̝͚̲͕̩̞͔͓̟͖̟̟̱̤̱̻̬̍͗͐̈́͋͐̽̾͂̍̄͒̔̈́͆͆̈̂̌́̇̀̌̐̎̈̔̐͌̍̑̑͆̊́̂͐͒̅̆̃̚̚̕̕̕͘̕͝͠͠͝ͅ ̴͕̲̥̩̲̳̗͚͔̺̹͎͔͔͛̀͆͆͗͊̒͛́̈̽̑̋̾͋̀́̂͒̍̽̾̊̾̋̒̈́͆̇͛͌̏̈́͑͛́̋̈́̐̿̅̈́̋̎̕͘͜͜͠͝͝͠͝ ̷̧̡̛̹̯̺̖̮̬͍̣̪̟̖̪̣̭̻̩̭̬̜̙̀͑̐͂͐͌̑͑̄̈̆̍̽́̈́͛̈́̃̄͂̍̄̓̋̆̓͒̊͑̐̑̉̃̐̔̐̇̉̾̋̈̅̄͊͂̍͛̅̔̄͂͆̅̌͗͊̓̃̔̈͌̋̃̓̋͗͘͘̚͜͝͝͝͠͝ ̷̡̧̧̛̛̙͖̰̼̼̗̰̮̲̱̝̩̻̣͉̗͖͙̬̭͉̫̣̙̫̞̲̯̜̻̦̏̂̍͆̓̇̊̀̊̇͐̊͌̆̍̈́͊̆̆̉͒̿͒͛̂̾̎̾̽̀̅͆͗̃̔̆̍̃̽͊̉̕͘̚̕̕͜͝͝͠͝ͅͅ ̷̢̛̲͈͈̜̖̣̘͒̊̂̈́͗͋̉̊̾͛̐̿͌̄̈̓͛́̀̀͠ ̷̢̢̨̛̛̛͚͙̟͎̪̥̗̪̜͈̜̜̺̲̪̮̞̠͍̺̥̤̠͉͐͗̆̒̉͑͆̌̃̈̂̋͌͂́̈̈́̀̋̀̚̚͜͜͝͝͠ ̴̡̨̡̢̢̛̳͓̫̭̩̱̰̙̤̰̲̭͚̭͚̣̟̲̤͉̠͍͉̩̼͕̣̘͉͙̳͈̳͎̘͎͙͖͇̠̼̯̳̤̗̦̭̳͓̘̪͖̺̠̠̻̳̲͕͇̺̫̜̲͖̰̞̜̯͙͈̭̍̈́̄̿̆̀̔̒̀̄͐̀͌̊͊̈́̿͂̇̇͐̌̊̏͐̄͌͆̃͂͊̌̿̎̆̏̔̾̌̈́̒̐̈̒̿͑́͒̄̓̋͒̈́̄̊̐̇̑͑̔̕͘͜͝͠͝ ̷̢̛̛̛̛̩̗̭̰̼͙̱͌̈́͂̽́̄͆̌̉̋̌͂͗͑͂͑̽̍̌͋̽̽͌̈̄̐͌̾̉̑͆͑͌̆͑̏͌͐̑̎̾̇̽̅̽͑͑͊̈̍͛̕̚͘͘̚̕̕̕͠͝͝͝͝ ̵̹͈̬͚̤͙̯̥͖̠̬̲̦͒̊̌͛͆̾̑̃͛͒̾̔̔͐̈̓̽̐͆̈́̓͐͗̐̋̑̑̈́͗̓͒̑̌̽̋͊̇̈́̑́̂̓̓́̇̓͐̾̾̾͊̂͊̓͛̏̃͌͂̕̚̚̕͝͠͝͝ͅ ̷̧̧̧̧̥̞̦̠̹̝͚̦̳̮̻͇̭̖͕̼̩̰̩̼̘̝͍̭̮̞̘̘̮̹̯̯̘̗̮̣̰̙̦̜̹̩̲̱̻̪̮̠̙̤̩̦̯̤͚̯͕̪̬͔͓̗͍͗̂̎͜͜ ̷̢̧̡̢̢̨͈̺̠̰̘̙̦̳̺̼̩̩͓̱̦͔͇̰͍͈͇̹̬̤̱̪̗̞̟̲̻̝͍̼͈̟̙̱̗͙̺̘͉̝̤̲̩͖̈̋̉͑̃̋̆͐̾̍̇̿͊̈͐̔͂̌̓̅̅̈̕̚͜͜͜͝͝ͅͅͅ ̶̡̡̨̢̡̡̧̡̛̛̲̥͕̠̩̩͈̯͔͓̬̦̘̺̭̙̖̟̯̟̲̝̯̤͚̪͉̻͔̮̻̱̟̜̤̤̗͎̮̯̥̻̺̜̖̹̮̻̝̞͓̲̬͚̜͙̘̭̙͇͛͊̈́̓̾͋̇̑̈́̂̐̅͒͋̉͋̑̋̔̍̓́͆͂̑̎̽̈̄̾͋̆͑̄͐̒͌̎͐̂̋̍̏͊͌͊͗́͌̄̅̓͑̈́͗̇̓͗͊̓́̏͆̽̅̀͘̚͘̕͜͜͜͠͝͠͝͠͠ͅ ̶̛͕̌̋͐̈͑͗́̃̈͊̎̂͌̽̓͋̿̇̅͛̇̃̅̿̀̀̈́̆͒̍̽̅̈́̐̈́̓̓͋͒͑̚̚͠͝ ̵̧̢̨̧̢̡̧̨͍̗̙͉̮͓̻̹͇̹̲̤̫̠͇̠͉̰͇̜͈͇̼̻͉̬͔͔̺̱̠̠͍͔͖̤̣̱͇̤̱͙͖̝͓͓̻͎͚̱̮̱͈̗̪̘̼̬͎̖̲̉̎̓͐͂̾͆̀͌̍̿̚͜͝͠L̶̢̨̧̡̛̥̹͎͕̜̫̺̙̫̲̮͙̦̯͉͕͓̖̘̟͖̺̤̉͐̋͐͒̔̾͆̆̍̌̏̔̏͗̔̏̉͐̄̀̂͋̎̈́̃̀̓̎̅̎̂̍̄̓͌̐̓̃̏̔̇̋̄̾̌̎̋̄̓̄̊͘̚͘͘͜͝͝͝͠͠ͅ ̷̧̡̨̜̫̺̹̮̦̼̜͙͍̯͉͎̹̜̲͉̭̥͔͙͎̰̭̤̝̦̰̜̮̩̭͓̞͖̬̟̠̅̌͒͂̌̈́̽͊̑͗̏̈͛̍͊̇͗͌̒̂̈́̈͊͂̔̂̌̽̆͗̈́́̑͑̒͑̏̽̇́̿̂̏͋͒̄̂́̑̈̓̚̕̕͘͝ͅ ̷̧̨̡̡̛̛͚̬̮̞͉̮̤̰̼̟͖̺̱͇̹͕̞̼̬͍̟̩̟͕̦̜̟̃̏̓͂͆̔̂̊̈́͌̈́̈́͌̉̿̈́͒̀͋͋̊̇̊̈̂̂̀̎̈́̌̈̓̏͛̂̄̅̊̓̋̑̾͆̊̂̉͆̍͆̕͘̕͜͝͝͠͠ͅͅ ̸̢̛̺̞̠̗̯͍̗̦͉͚̼̫̪͚̗̜̗̃̓̊̿̇̋̔̑̽̂̒̒̐͒̑̽̈̔̇̄̃̋̌̈͊̇̋͌̄̔̎̓̓͌͒̏͌̆̇̉͑̅̔͗̐̕͘̕̚͝ ̴̛̞̱̱̲̠̱̺̖͂̆͆͂̑̎͋̄̓̋̎̏͊̎̈́̀̐̍̔͊̉͑̔̈́̇͌̿̈́̅̒̆͗̈̈̄̈́̍̈̄̎̆͐͋̓̌̿̉̋͂͒̿̑͊̎̃̏͛͑͘͘̕͘̕͝͝͝͝͝ͅ ̵̢̢̣̩̺̻͙͔̭̣̭̝̼̒̒ ̸̢̧̧̢͖̫͎̩̻͚͇̤̙̖̲̤͉̖̖͙͙͕͔̖̝͙̹͖̟̠̥̗̺̤̱̭̙͚͙͎̪͓̪͊͗̾̿́͑̔͊͌̆̍̈͋͒̈́̕͠͝͠͝ ̷̡̡̡̢̛͇̠̩̻̫̰̟̺̳͇̰̘͓͚̘̙̫̟̭̻̤̻̟̝̟̫̼̖͎̳̹̻̥̣͚̏͐̿͗̂͌͋͗̿̄͌̊̔̉̔̑̅̔̂̔̇̍̂͂̈́̀̀̓͗͑̔̄̃͌̃̽̂̒̈́̐̆̉̑̆͂́̌͗̒̔̓̇͐̅̃̕͘̚͝͝͝͠͠͠ͅͅ ̶̧̨̢̡̡̢̡̧̺̦̪̪̪̝̟̰̝̭̯̬̮͎̠̥̬̬̗͙͎̫̞̗̞̳̺̙̞̪̥̭̬̜̝̖̲̥͕̥̥̠̘̪͉̤̩̹͖̯̪͖̹̙̼̳̰̙͎̥̗̯̱͔͂̈́̽̒̾̊̃̄͌͋͑̓̽̂̅̊̉̕͜͜͜͜ͅ ̴̢̛̙͙̻̉͂̀͑̐̏̊̈̒̿̅̄͛̓͗͌͐̍̽̊̈́̂̅̍̈́͗̎̈́͗̈̈̔̍͑͛̄̓̅̽͂̅͐̆̎̌͂̂̅͘͘͘̕̚̚ ̴̧͚̥̜̪̠͉̜͎͙̻̜͚͍͓̮̠̬̮͚̰͇̰̮̭̗͖̱̭̪̻̦̗̟̫͍̙͖͍̠̤̰̪̲͔̖̤͚͚͓̱̳͎̼̬̣͓̰̅͌̍̽̆̄̿̉̃͆̒̈̐͛̈̿̒̓͋̋̓̎̎̈́̎̈͐̑͒̍̉͒̓̈́̆̈́̎͐̿̂̓̈́͊̂͆͐͊̏̈͗͋̇̀͆̚͘̚͘̚̚͜͠͝͝͝ͅͅͅͅ ̴̨̧̢̧̻̖̺̤͚̯̝̪̫̞̬͎̰͉̳̮̝̞̙̼̟͚̫̜͙̫͇͇̫͍̰̼̺̠̟͈̘̳̪̗̥̗͚̼̜͕͎̠̰̘̠̃̆̂́̑͑͑̎͌͋̿̊͋͆̇̐̓͂͊͆͆͘̚̕͘̚͜ͅͅ ̷̧̠͔͕͚͖̮̇͑͐̋̿͋̈̀͋̅͐̒̄͒̔̽̈́̏̎̒͛͛̌͛̈̇̏̽͌̃̇̇̇͊̐͛̆̉͠͝͝ͅ ̵̧̨̛̜͙̯̖̫͉̙̯̞̪̠̟͖̰͈̤̭͕̭̦̟̜̦̥̜͉̝͍̿̌͐̔̓̒̽̈́͜ͅ ̴̢͙̟̫̹͕̙̯̖̬̫͈͕͙̳̈́̈́̋̉͒̐̓̔ͅD̷̡̨̢̡̧̡̢̡̧̡̨̧̧̨̛̬͔̖̬͚̯̗̻͍̼̣͍̮̭͉͇̞̰̮̠̰̟͇͕̫͎͚̗̳̰̻͉̪̺̳̪̦͙̖̣̬̤̞̥̖̭͇̜̺̹͖͙̺̠̭̩̰͇͔̝͉͆̉̂͑̎̃̆͆͆̀̾̃̿́̈̌̈́̔̇́͌̌̌̂̓̍͌͛̍̒̅͌́̍̓̃̽̊͆̊̇͗̿͐̄͋̂̐͆̅̈́͛̓̚̚̚͘͘̚͘͘̚͜͜͠͝͝ͅͅͅ ̴̜̹̘̱̗̝̯̣͉̘͉͎͈̗͍̳͙̹͉̮̲̦͖͖̗͈̖̪͓̘̘͑͆̾̉̄͆̑̄̽̉͐̈͒̓̈́̃͑͋̓̒̆̊͆̇̍̿̕ͅ ̷̨̧̨̢̛̺͉̩͕̯̮̬͓͍̲̯̫̭͈͎̱̯̝̗̮̗̜̪͙̩̙̞̮̮͖̥͓̗̜̭͉͙̜̺̱͈́̏̋̋̌̀͐̇̄̃̐̒͂̑̒̐̂͘ ̶̨̡̧̨̼̣̮̦̟̩̲̤̬̪̼̺͔̭̗̲̼̙͈̝̜̯̞̫̯͉͙͇̦̬̖̠͖̙̱̲̹̂̎̊̏̑̈́̓͐̍̄̇̒̓̊̓̒̌̑͐͆̆͗̊̉̃͗̍̑̿͗̓͆̇̀͑̋̇͒̽̃̉͑̈́͌͒͗̊͒̑̈́̓͐̉͗͆̾̉̂̒͗̋̄͑̍̊̒͘͜͝͠͝͝͝ ̵̨̡̡̧̡̡̛̣͕̮̥̟̳͔͚̼͍̖̪͚̘̻̺̮̩̘͇͖̳͕̯̺̳̣͎̙͉̳̝̞̪̘̱̮̦̥̮̪͔̤͙̻̲̼̇̿̉̅̄͐̑̒̅͊́̅̊̈́̓̄̓̋̓͂̓̄͐́̌̍͋̓̑̒̉̎̀͌̇̽̎͗͒͗͌̅͊͐̚̚͘̕͝͝͝͝ͅͅͅ ̴̢̢̡̨̡̧̢̨̢̡̢̛̰͚̣̹̤̗̬̬̦̮̺̮͈̭̗̦̲̝̞̣̲̦̦̦̱̲̥̻̬͇͓̞̣͉̮̘̼͎̲̣̰͕͕̭͔̠̦͍̬̬̘͚̰̟̗̩̫̑̿̏͗̾͂͗̂̃̌͑̊̆͋̊̓͗̐̐̓̈́̓̅̔̉̅̑̿͐͌͋̿͌͋͂͒̓̔̾͌͛̇͐̄̊̌̿̍͌̋̇̔͒̒̑̌̅́̏͋̏̎̏͂̓̈́̔̏͋̕̕̚̚͜͝͠͠͝͝͝ͅͅ ̴̢̢̨͚̲͓̠͓̻͍͓̤̻̖̭̟̤̱̹̱̺̩̱͔͍̘̬̯̠̙͚̥̖̦̤̳̠͖̤̹̹͎̺̫͔̭̗̦͈͖̱̖̰̰̟̺̱͈͍̖̰͈͎̱̗̩̤̦͇̭̣̥̘́̒̒͑̒͒̈̿̿͒͑̎̕͜͜ͅͅͅ ̷̨̨̢̭̮̣̩̰̖͎̺̼̹̣̘͚͈̞͖̼̲̻̠̪̝̙̪̥̫͙̯͚̈́̌̐͌̒̔͋͑̊́͐̊̒̐̓͑̊̈́̉̈̆̾̉́̽͆̋͆͗̋̚̕͘͜͜͝͝͝ͅ ̶̛̛̭̯̖̄̾̇̃̑̿̋͑̀͛̏̊̽̎̽͌̓͗͒̓̐̔̓̒͋̀̅̀͊̑͛̐͆̆͐̒̓̌͑͑̿̏̆̒̃̇̋̒̏̂͌̔͘͘̕͘̚̕̕̚͘̚͝͠͠͠͠ͅ ̶̡̧̧̨̛͇̬͙͍̻̼̟̙̝͈̣̜̣̱̹̦̙̙̩͇̩̤̼̞̝̰̱͓̩̬̜̘̪̗̓̏͛͊̋̽̌̒̆̐̾̎̉̅̎͋͛̽̎̄͆̾̓̾̓̐̀̂͘͘̕̚͜͜͜͝͠ͅͅ ̵̡̡̢̧̨̡̛̛͚͓͇̗̫̤̘̩̲͎̻̱̙̩͎͉̺̪͖̩̟̯̭̟͚̥̲̤̤̻̗͕̬̲͈̟͕̱͚̜͉̰̜̭̬̠̐̽̅̎͌͌͋̈́̀̄̈́͒̉̈́̌̾̊͐̊̇̀̐̎͑̆̿͐͌̓̉̓̄̽͛͐̂̊̒̅̓̈́̿̉͗̋̆̄͋̔͗̃̎͋̽̑̓͘͘͘͘͜͠͝͝͝͝ͅ ̸̢̢̡̛͈̻͉̠̦̖͓̫͇̪̩͙͇͕̞͍̠͉̜̮͇̩͓͙͉̳̤̻̝̬̞̜͉̥͍̫̳̾͛̓̊̌̌͂̑͌̄̊͆͂̊͐̈́̊̍͒̄͐̃̐̏̓̆͊̐̈́̐̎̄̏̐͌̓͑̃̓̑̈́̏̃͘͘͘̕̕͘͝͠͝ ̴̨̡̢̺̲͔̣̱̖̪̟̳̜̲̯͓͈̝̫̖̯͚͓̟̼̟̭̺̮̥̤͍̤͎̞̫͎͇̩̯͕̣̘̣̯̞̯͍̳͕̦͖͔͉̈́̈́͊̾͒͒̐͋̋͆̄͒̓̑̊̋̄͑͛̏̈̽̊͑̒͂̈́͗̂͑͗̾̈́̑̊̾͛͋͑̕͝͝ͅͅͅ ̷̧̡̢̛͎̘͙̙͔̫͕̭̜̱̹͕̘͍̩͎̺̳͎̳̼̤̬̟̺̘̦̞̻̥̝͖͎͓̩͔̞͓͔̩̮̬̩̦̤̗͎̖̬̱̹̩̪̝̪̘͖̫̓͗̽͒̉̆̃̔͂́̄̔̆͆͊̓̅͆͂̍̉́̈́͛͗͌̌̍̇̔̎̐͑͒̐̈́̏̓͑̊̈́̈́̈́̊̔̈́̏͒̌͊̄́͌̀̅̚̕̚͜͝͠͝͝͝͝͝ͅͅͅ ̵̡̹̖̻͉̙̩̗̠̲̙̞̹͍̹̜̭̉͛̈̾̂̈́̒̌͛͗̄͒̃͐̀̑̈́͑͊͊́̽͘̚͠ ̸̧̨̨̡̡̡̧̛͙̖̬͔͖̣̪̩̤̰̬̯̪͉̘̤̼͕̬̫͉͇̲͎̭͙̞̗̥͇̦͙͉̮̭̰̜͙͓̤̻̭̼̬̠̟͈̫͍̬̮̬̗̺͎̺̲̠͙̮̫̠̻̤̳̹͋͗̈́̓̾͊̀͌̇̇̄͒͑́̍̊̓͌̈́̏̍̆͂̌̅̂̇̔͌̀̎̒̀̀̂̄̔̔͒͑̔̈̀͊͊̓̅̓̆͘̕̕̚͘̕̚͜͜͠͝͠͝͝͠ ̵̛̛͚͚̩͉̊́̌̐͊̈͂̓̋̋̂̈́̎͐̐͂͐͂͂̃̊̅̽́̿̑̂̄̀̍͆̅̇͛͌͐̉̌̉͂̎̿̄̊̊͌͐͑͂̏͊̈́̅͌̓̒͊̎̈́̌̚̕̚͘͝͠͝͝͝ ̴̧̡̨̡̡̢̢̛̲͈̰͚͇͓͙̼͈̟̻͓̰̣̫̖̞͎͉̫͙̺̺͇̜͔̟̖̠̭̯̹͙͎̲̯̠̬̲͕̼͇̘͉̤̘͖͈̜̬͈͍͈͚̣̫̞̣̲̣͈̓̈̓̈́̇̆̑̂̈́̿̋̓̿̎̇̋̀̂̑̉͝͝ͅ ̶̨̡̡̡̢̡̛̛̛̮̯̗̳̺͎̺͔̹̼̼̞̮̪͚̟͔̮̟͔̺̘̠̘̼̩͕̮̞̗̖̱̤͈̞̥͕͎͖̏̂̀̈́͐̐̓̈̎̐̈̎̎̅̿̾̅̑̎̒͊͗̾̌̍̂̉̈́͌͋̔̐̄̆̍̐̒̀͆̈́̀̅̃̊͑̏̅̇̏̃̇͆̊̈́͂͆͆͘̚̚̚͜͜͠͠͝͠͝͠͝͝͝͝͠ͅͅͅ ̵̢̡̡̡̨̧̧̢̛͓̮̫̙̻̜̞͖̰̻͔͈̼͎̲̫͖̥̫̠̱̱͚͕̳̙͉͍͓̙̫̲̺͖̫̙̹̲̙̖̝̜̼̺̣̬̟̺̼̮͕̘̝̞̪͔͕̞͇͔̯̭̩̗̱͚̰̥̩͖͖̯̬̐̄͑͗̌̌̔̐͒͋͗̔͂̽̏͛͋̓͋͑͆̑͒̒̏͋̋̈́̽̍̌̓͒̔̈́͐̂͑̊͋̉͛̉̈̔͒̀̒̽̈̎̔̓̍͗̌̃̂͘̚͘̕̚͘̚͠͝͝͝͠͝ͅ ̷̢̨̨̧̧̪͈̝̱͕͚̲̭̮̞̝̯̥̲̮̣̪̪͖̖̼̮̪̦̤̪̺͕̼͎̩̳̣͔̩̪̯͉͉̟̬͈̻̯̫͇̰̩̺̩͙̙̭͂̐̎̅̀̐͑̂̎̆̀͑͐͋͒̌͒̕͜͜͠͠ͅ ̷̧̡̨̡̧̛͍͓̹͇̫̲̫̠̼̗̬͓̱̘̳̙̖͈̙̭͉̟̟̰̝͍̝̥͚̭͚͕͓͕̥̠̬̦̘͇͈̯̞̞͇̳͕͋̑̇́͝ͅͅ ̸̨̢̢̢̛̥͇͎̗̘̝̱̯̬͔̻̼̥͖͈̩̥͍̳̤̲͉̹͚̖͇̪̣̣͚̦̝̭͚̦̲͙̓͗̈́͛̽͒̔̽͌̿̓͐̓͒̔̌̃͛̐́̈́̌͋̽͂̈͒̒͋̇̄̽̆̿̍̒͛̉̆̈́̋̌̈́̃̆͂͐͊̓͒͊̓̔͆̌̾̇̾͋̑̌͘͜͝͝͠͝͝ͅͅ ̶̨͎͕̙̺̳̞͙̟͚̳̼͙̍͋̍̂̒̌̊̄̄̒͊͑̆̑̃͛͒̽͛̇̅̈́̇̎̑̏̈́̅̓̃̔̄͗́̆̇̽̆͋͒̐̓̐́̂̅̋̊̉͂̂͂͌͌̊̐̒͆̊̒͐̃̎̏̕̚̕̕͘̚͝͝͝͝͝ ̷̡̡̨̨͍̻͓̥͔̭̦̙̤̲̭̰̟̟̬͈̭͚͎͖̫̫͈̫͙̯̜̠̭͓̹͉̞̭̹̲̟͍̗̩̞͖̬̤̭̩̓͋̅͆̆̎͊̄͗͐͜͜͠ͅ ̵̢̧̧̨̧̛͚͕̱̥͈̺͈͈̭͕̤͓̲͈̩̲̝̝͓̲͔̩̬̖̲̅͂͒͐̍͋̌̏̌̈̿͌͐̋̿͆̈̊̋̾̏̀̅̄͑̄̀́͋̌̅͊͛͑̈́͌͋̃̂̑̈͋̓͘̕͘͘͜͠͠͝͝͠ ̶̡̢̢̛̻̳̼͈̩̰̲̣͇̻͍̜̹̤̼͉̞̭̣̲̯̙͔̝̣̯̜̱̪̻̞̰̭͎͈̠̹̩̮̘̫͎̬̬̻̲͓͕̥̄̉̇͆́̊̆͑͂̉͗̓̾̋̈́̈͂́̒̈́̇̌͆̾̒͋̀̏̑̐̅̎̔̂̀͆̍͂͂̓̉̅̈̈́͂̉͆̇̇̾̀̚̚͘̚͝͝͠͝͝ͅͅ ̵̡̢̢̧̛̛̛͓̝̻̗̱͇̹͕̝̱̼̦͈̦̝͙̺̯̼̫̘̥̲̣͉͖̪̳̠͋̈̒́̎̈͊͗̿̈́̈́͋̓̐̒̒̀̋̾̒͊͒͗͛̎̋̾͂̄́͒̿̉̈̃̋̓̈́̀̓̽̂̎̌͂͂̋̾̌̚͜͝͝͠͝͠͠͝ͅ ̶̡̰͉̞̥̥̣̳̟̮̱̲͖̰͓̻̈́̄̀̊̊̀̏̽̚I̵̛̛̞̞̬̗̯̞̜̳͖̼̪̜̙͇͖͖̗̻̼̬̰̱̰̦̋̂͊̽̊̾̃̒̿̓͗̊̄͑͌̈͋̍̆̎̅̐̎͛̍̄̍̇̐͌̉̃̍̃̊̋̄̽͑͋̋̔͗̿̊̅̈́͑̾̾̎̅͂̋̈͂͐́͑̈̌̊͘͘̚̚͠͝ͅͅ ̸͉̳͕͉̞̹̰͚̲̬̝̐̃̓͐̎̋̂͂̏͑̈́̓̇̾̊͘͝ ̴̦̖̩̩͓̼͔͖̙̒̃̈̏̃̆̾͗͐̈́̂̆̕ ̷̨̡̛̛̪͉̱͉̦̼̹͓͍̬̙̩̙̪̘͎̭̫͉͚̟̘̻̥̘̳̳͎̤̮̥̙̬̾͋̊͑̐̈͒̈́̽̏̅̓̈́͛͂̽̅̎̑͒͂̍̈͗̒͑̚̚͜͜͠͝͝͝ͅ?̵̨̛̑̈́͂̂̓͊̔̈͐̄̅̽͒̈́͌̓͊̊̊̋͋̈̀̓̓̀̈͛͑͒͆̕̚͝ ̸̢̧̛̛̯̜̰͉̬̫͔̩̳͚̹̱͔̞͇͈̼̻̣͍̟̝̬̒̉̉̎͂̍͑͐͂̂͊̃͆̎̽̀͗̐͂͊͝ͅ

 

whattup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read went offline

 

kaegay: okay im actually shaking this is horrifying

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: HGFDRTYJHGFDERTYJHFDSERTYHGFDERYUHGFDERTYHGFDSWER

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: if ye had the chaence to chaenge yer faete

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: W̴̛̯̬͚̝̯͎̗͖͍͍͈̬̦̗̯̭͇̺̝̺̫͚̗̙̦̭͍̘̜̍͛͌̑̀̇̾̀̈͛͋̎̅̿̓̈́̏͗̑͗́͑̓̆̾̆̍̐̎̈̄̎̀̿̽̇̈́̀͋̀̏̓̊̂͗̈́̆̽͑͘͘̕͠͝͠͠͝ͅ ̷̨̢̡̡̛̛͇̯͍͕̲͙̳̤͔̹͚̲̗̬͎̼̟̝͓̮̺̖̦͉̳̭̝̗̩͖̹̺̙̹̤̭͇̮͙̗̥̪͔̲̖͎̮͎̦͉͙̾̇̄̉̋̄̋̒̐̇̈̄̐̊͛̆̂͂͐̓͗̋͐͑̉͑̂̊̂̊̈́̌̉͌̈́̑͛̎͋̿̾̔͗̂́͆͘͘̚͜͝ͅͅ ̸̘̪̰̘̭̱̗̘̳̼̼̲̼̟̫̝͓͈̱͈̅͋̄́͛̏͒̏͐̐͋̀͊̈́̌̓̇̑͛̽̆͐̈́͆̍͠͝ ̶̨̡̨̧̛̛͔͈̼̩̪̖͍̦̬̼̝̳̙̲̯͇̝̯̭̯̫̖͚̼̞̙̘̝̣̫̖̼̝̺̠͕͚̮̙̜̮̫͙̱̯͎̭̗̲̼̤͈̳̝̖͙̥̗̖̆̒̓̌̎̏͐̈́̅͊͂̄̆̈́̇̓̈́͂̍́͂͌͗͗̾͛̓̐̒̄̆̔̓̾̅̒̇̈̚̕̚̕͜͝͠ͅͅ ̷̡̨̢̩̲̼̙̬͚̱̲̤̣͕̤̭̺̠̗̥̩̤̞̬̝̭̏̈͗̃͋̊̊̀̏̽͆̕̕͜͜͠ ̷̢̧̡̣̺͖̞̺̲̮̹̪̫̫͂̈́̔͐̿̍̿̓͐͋͊̌̅̑̋̔̽̾̄̍̍̅̉͆̌̑̋̎̀̒̽͑̊̽͌̃̄̑̓̾̇̄́͒͘͘̚̕͝͝͝͝ ̵̡̛̛̼͇̻̩̣̱̰͈͉̪͈̥̪͇͚̠̪͚̬̗̤͙̼̘̗̜̼̥̝̗͙͖͚̝̙̤̬͎̝̥͓̼̣̜̫̼̫̗̟̼̠̬͔̲͔͔̲̞͋̔͛̈́̽̉̃̂̇̋̉͋͂̓͋͗̄̎͘͘̚͝͝͝ͅͅ ̵̧̛̛̗͖̬̝̗̱̐̾́́̿̃̑̐̈̑́͌̆͊̏̑̇̏́͑͐̃̍͑̇̇̉̓͆̏̈́̐̍̑͒̊̋̐̑̃͐̈́̑̀̎͗͊̈́̃̀͗̄̆̑̇͆͆̕̚͝ ̷̢̹̱͉͔̣̺̼̠̼̟̫͎̳͈͖̱͇̜͕̹̫̣͎͈̪̻̣̙̺̦͚͎̤̱̔̓̃͐̕̚͜͜͝͝ ̶̧̛̛̱͕͙͓̞͍̩̙͕̝͎̮̹͖̘̤͉̣̽̊̊̀̏͑̐̎̃̿͛̇͗̔͗̔̔̾̐̓͗̂̌̄̉̌̔̓̊̈́̌̓̏̓̐̋͂͂͊͛̑̀̋̿̇̀̾̓͛̊̓̕̚͘̚͜͠͝͠͝͝͝͝ ̴̡̨̡̨̢̢̢̨̡̪͓̯̹̣͚̞̳̥͉̭̙͙̘̬̯͔̲͓̺̹͔̘͓̪͈̮͙̭̺̤̳͈͇̜̠̬̻̻̫̹͛̓̆̂́̃̆̇̌͂̈́̈́̇͗̋̊̓͆̽͐̍͂͘͝͝͠͠͝ ̵̛͓̬̙̌̐̓͌̎̌̀̋͌̿͛̈́̽͂͂̏͋̋̈́͗̐̐̿̚͠͝Ơ̵̧̢̨̨̢͚̟̱͈̦̠̮͔̜͉͖̺͚̜͈̗̺̙͔̙̣͍̠͉͓̜̥͔̮͖̙͔͎͖͕͇̱̤͚̖̳͎̰̖͇̞̮̲̰͈̠̳̪͈̍͗̓͐̆͂̽̄̔̋̈̓̈̾̏̓͑̽̈́̒͑͋͂̑̆̿́͆͛̇̎̋̽̕̕͘͘̚̕̚͜͜͜͜͠͝ ̵̡̧̨̛̛̜̻̠̥͔̠͔̱͓̟̟̟̹̙̗̝̯͙͓̺̰̻̱̞̥̩͕̺̟̼͚̤͍̱͖͕̱͔͇̳͈̬̟͈̗̩͓̙̭͕͍̳̰͈͔͍͚̩̘̹̪̰̇̓͗͗̍̏̿̑̍̅̋̊̃̉͋͌́͑̉̈́̃̄͗̇̄͋̈́̔͑͐͂̏̎̍̈̈́͑̍̈̌̏͛͒̂̅̿̊̆͆̕̕͘̕͜͜͜͠͠͝ ̷̡̨̨̧̢̲̦̱͕̮̤͖̹͕̬̲͈̦̟̪̳̟̣̭͕̯͔̻̳̰̹̞͍͉͕͚̖̤̙̼̻̝̘̻̻̪̱̳͖̮̣̙̟͙̘͓͉̦͉̝̫̬͉̙̓͒̒͗̔̈́͒͋̒̽͊́̉̄̎͛̑̀͜͠ͅ ̷̢̢̧̡̧̧̛̩̮̘͈̳̤͙̜̫̼̲͍̗̰͎̬͇̣̫̼̻̪͈͚̳̼̻͎̰̠̘͚̣̤͉̩̠̺̦͍͎̳̐̒̇͒͛̆̆̆̋̈́͒̌̽̾̄̍͗̃͆̉̏̂́͑̓̍̾̀̽̽͑̓̐̈́̑͐́̍̚͘͘̚͜͜͜͝͠ ̶̡̨̞̬̯͙̯̖̲͎͇͍̤̭̖̞̗̜̲̗̳̘̯͚͖͈͓̻̗̲̱͈̥̳̦̐͒̔̌͘̚͜ ̴̢̢̛͓̪̱̜͕̼͉̬̘͔̩̰̘͖̝͚̳̖͔̘̜͉̳͖̟͎̖͍͖̳̬̦̇̐̄͂͐̅̍̐̅̿̇̅̋͗̅̈̑͝ ̶̨̢̡̻̬̳͓̠̟̗͍̣͙̦̰͉̥͕͍̤̤͈̻̾̅̃̀̆͆̂͌́̾̿͑́̓̉̾͛͜ͅ ̸̨̡̡̨̛̛̛̦͉̖̖͖̙͙͉̬̻̹̟̬̹̫̩̺̞̗̫͔̘̱̣̜̪̰̜̲̞̮̞̙̝̹̙̺̦̳͖̫̥̩̫̂̋̽́̇̔͐̆̀͑̉̉͌̋̒͐̒̆̆̽́͒̽͒̄͘͘͜͠͝ͅͅ ̸̢̡̧̛̛̝͙͔̱̱̹̜͈̼̤͚̯̦̯͎̝̤̭̪̙̮̼̦̮̫̙̫̭̖͉̗̼̲͗͛̋̅̒̀̂́̆̐̂̀͂͊̃̑͂̄̃̈́̅̕̕͘͝͠ͅ ̵̢̡̡̨̨̛̺̣̟̗͙͙̣̦̤̣͍̻̟̤̬̳͈̠̥͕̻̹̭̯̞̜̩͕̘̹̗̭̘͎̥̰̬̠̗̥̭̫̻̯̠̩̙̘͛̎̈́̊͑̋̎̄͊̌̇̋̉́̍̅͗̅̽̃̾͒͌̉͆̕̕͜͝͠͝ͅͅ ̸̢̢̡̡̛͕̟͔̮̹̩̤͔̟͙͈͍̗̳̞̝͚̬̞̠̖͇̝̖̬̠̙̪̣͕͓̦̫̤̳̙͈̠̙̟͇̗̱̩̇̑͊͂̉̾͒̂͜͠ͅͅͅ ̷̨̨̧̧̛͕͇̬͓̲̼͎̘̝̦̠͍͉̙͔͙̥̘͍̘͇̖̰̘̙̲̭̠̠̰͎̱̹̦͚̣̼̮̣͎̙̰̖̫̝̩͛̑̊̄͋̽̈̉͐̈́̓̒̈́͗̎̃̒̓́͆̾̈͋̋͋̾͛̓͐̕͜͝͝ͅͅ ̶̢̡̛̦̭̩̫̖͙͎̯͍̜̱̺̂͒̀͗̑̈́̈́͛̀͋̈́͗̽͌̉͌̒́̅͆̒̐̍̾̿̎̉̀̓̚̕͜͝ ̷̢̢͎̼̳̱̯̫̯̲̱̠͎̜̗̘̥͎̼̲͖̫̜̣̦̻̭̪̞̙̹̗̻̪͇͍̍̌̄̄͊̐̽̑͋̾̆͗͐̇̆̃̈̓̊̿̿̀̈́͊̓̐̿̌̉͘̕͜ͅͅ ̷̢̢͚̦̜̯̝̙̤̮͓̰̙̰̞̤̺͓̩̞̣̮͍̥͈̖͖̘̲̞͌͊͛̊̽͝ͅ ̴̡̢̡̨̧̛̰̝̰͙̯͇̠͉̳̭̝̪͎̬̦̘̣̹̘̯̞͓̘͖͔͚̬͚̺̞͍̮̼͙̯̗̼̻̟͖̹̳̖̝͙̎͆̾̈́̅͌̃̇͌̑͛̎͗̍̊̄̌̈́̀͆̇͒͌͛͑͛̍̒̂̃̅͛͛̈́̅̔̏̀̐̎̂̈́͆̋͒̑͗̉͂͌̏͛͂́̏͑̚͘͘͝͠͠͝͝ͅ ̷̢̨̧̨̢̧̧̧̝̭̝̙̝̼̰̼͕̝͚̼͉͙̩̮̜̪͎͎͈̝̃̈́̓̃͂͐͌̓͒̐̈̆̉͑͂̇̏̓̕͘͘̕͝͝ͅͅŲ̸̨̧̡̢̫̺̝̥̞̪͕̪̙͖͍̰̘͉̰͕̯̤͎̭̮̗͇̗̞̰̪͕͈̦̼͕̱̺̳̘͖̥͍̯̜̪̬̦̞͉̹̥̝̲̟̱̽̽̇̽̾͌̽͑̓̉̈́͑͌̚͘͜ͅͅ ̵̧̨̨̛̗̪̜̰͔̲̥̬͍̭̪͎̮̥͎͔̗̳͖̘̦̖͙̫̺̻̤͖͓̲͈͉̼̞͓̜̉̿̐̀̓̋̓̋̄̏̈́̿̿͛̑̑͋̋̐̈́̋͐͋̌̏͂́̾̏̐̔̈́͒̐̾̇͒̾̊͐́́͑̌͒̋̾̚̚̚̕͘͜͝͝͝͝͝͝ ̷̨̨̛̩̥̳̘̮̺̤̯̗̳̮̺͉̝̒̔͐͗̿͛̈͊̑͗͋͒̒̏̈̈̑̈̅̅̐́̊̇̾̽͐̊̋̿̓̇͛̊͂̑̈́͌̃̎̚̚͘͝͝͠͝͝͠ͅ ̶̧͓͔̬̜̤̹̝̻̪̻͚̪̍̇̄ͅ ̶̡̢̛̖͔͙͖̟̖̖͑̐̆̌̔̈̍́͗̌̊͑̐̓̓͛͌͑́̊̾̍̀̅̏͗̂̽̈́̍̽͛̉̕͘̕͝͝ ̷̨̧̢̧̧̟̫̗͚̜̞͕̘̟͓͍̘̥̞̪̘͓̙̤̲̯̝̪̼̲̼̝͎̲̺͍͙͍̯̺͚̍̿̏͆͋̆͑̎̎̉̐͗̕͜͠͝ ̷̢̛̛̛̛̰͓̘͔͔͇̳͚̻̺̲̣͕̯̲͑͐̓̇̏͒̎̄͑̒̐͆̍̈́̔̽͒̊͆̽͆͑̅̍̒̿̅̆̈̋̎͑̂̌̓̈̈̾̈́͌͗̆̇̽̈̏̐̚̕͝͝͝͠͠ͅ ̵̡̨̧̜̙̹͔̤̜̙̞̥̻̹̣̬̱̗̤̱̙̫̘̬̞̲͕̽͑̐͜ͅ ̵̧̡̧͉̫̻̻͉͔̙̤̪͈͎̘̘͎̲͔̤̺̱̝̹̯̏̍̎ ̷̡̨̢̧̛̛̩̼̮̹̮͎̱̟͖̟̤̭̤͓̩̻̰̪̭͎̬̟͚͔͎͈̙̹̤̜̖̪̭̜̰̼̭̲͉̝̩̝̟̗͓̥̺̣̯̯̐̓̋̅̇̽̅́̆̃̐͐̔̑̓͗͆͋̉̓̾̏̇͘͜͝͝͝ͅͅͅͅͅͅͅͅ ̸̢̡̡̨̡̢̢̨̦͖͎̣̘̳͔̣̮̤̫̮̪̠̹̱̰̹̻͇̹̟͙̹̗̠̦͉͇̰͎͈̼̳͇͎̬͎̘̘̩̩̭̟̥͙͔͍͂̄͌̾͒̒́̈́͂͌̾̏̎͜͜͜͜͜ͅͅ ̵̢̨̨̨͇̤̦̰̬̻͉̘͈̣̞̦͈̲̭̙̬͉̞̻̻̲͇̠̫̯̲̫̣͆̾̃̐̒̐͂́̉͂̈́̀̌͗̊͒̈́͂͒̌̀̋̍͌̉͌̀̕̕̕͘ ̴̡̡̨̡̛̛͎͚̟̼̫̻̱̱͙͙̺̣͈̮͕̮̣̜̯͖͙̤̠̩̬̮̞̣̖̗͔̠̜͍̳͍͍̲̘͎̽͐̃̇̊̊̽͂̍̊̇͊̈͋̊̉͛̐̚̕͠͝͝ͅ ̸̡̛̛̬͖͉̙̼͉͐̍͗̓̂͑̓̽͌͗͑̇̈́͒̌͒̎͋͗̍̎̓̇̔͗̚͘̚͠͠͠͝͝ͅ ̸̨̡̢̨̢̧͎͇͙̤̗̣͎̝͍͓̳̮͈̳̲̙̤̥̙̬̪͚̙̼͚̻̱͎͔̘͈̪̳̮̳͕͇̮̠̰̟̝̻̘̲̥̗͕͚̪̱͖̈̿̈́͆̈́̓͂̿̆̐̌͋͐̽̃̂͑̍̈͊̆̊̿̄̒̐̈́́̍̒͆̏̆̓̏̕̕̕͜͠͠͝͝͝͝ͅḼ̸̡̡̛̛̛̝͔͉͉͓͓͍̺̘͎̹̪̻̠̲͇͙͉̣̭̮̝̜̜̣͇̣͈̾̔̑̐̈́͒̆͌̇̈́̊̈͋͆̌̓̾͒̔͆͒͌͊̾̓̾̐̒̐̑̆̎̽͆̈̈̑̔̔̉͐̚̚͝͠͝͠͠͝ͅͅ ̸̡̧̖̤̖͎̰̄͌͐̔̍̎̆̆̂̒͐̔̊̄̅͗͆̂̄̂͆͂͊̚̕͝ͅ ̶̧̡̨̢̨̡͎̩̻̫̰̖͓̜͍̠̱̪̩̱͚̲̘̘̝͍̳͚̖̰͚͉̹̩̰̼̗̗̖͈̣͓̝̰̱̙̗̺͕̦̬̮̻̥͙͔̘̘͇̌̅̀̈͜͜ͅ ̸̧̛͙̺̟̯̤͖̖͙̠̞͓̠̳̠̙̱̫̻̤̫̗͙̗̩͍̖͋͂̓͗͗͂͆͗̑͊̆̽̈́͂̑̓̇̅̈́̎͂͒̃̒̾͂̈́͌̒̄̓̄̓̇͆̍͒̒̋̌̅̒̐͆̈́͑̆̉̒̅̏̊̕̕̚̕̚͝͠͝ ̶̨̢̡̢̧̨̧̧̡̢̛̛̪̫̻̜̩̺͕̖͙̟̤͎͍̩̫̥͍̖̯̦̩͍̘̥̯̭̜͖͈̟͉̩̲͍̳̥̜̙̰̪̠̹̝͖͎̫̻̤̱̱͆̃̈́͛̌͋́̐̏́̅̈̾̿̈́̎̏̾̊͊̽̀̚͘̕͘̚͜͝ͅͅ ̶̧̢͈̱̼̹̹͉̱͈͖̺̖̙̱̙̥̖̹͖̻̤̬̪̙̠̟̹̝̪̹̳̓̒̃̈́̓̒͒̽̾͑͑̈̏͒̔͋͛̔̒̉́̂̋̓̉͂͌̍̈̋͐̓̓̐̽͊̈͌͌͘̚͘͝ ̸̟̼̽̐̋̚ ̶̨̢̧̛̛̬̦̹̱͔̜̞̬͖͍̺̗͙̗̘̺̗̣͍͚͖̗̻̩͉̖̼͈͓̩̬͎̣̪̩̫̓̄̎̇͑̍͌͆̂̑͛̇̐̈́͋̌͑̉̄̎̄̑͊͂̈̇̔̊̍̈́͋̓̑̈́́̎̕͘͠͝͠ͅ ̸̨̧̨̨̡̨̨͔̯̜̜̺̫͓̠̥̲̬̯̼̹͖̙͈͉̩̮͎̳̮͙̗̠̙͍͚̝̜̮̲͇͔̜͔̻̻͇͕̦͙̱͔̮̬̫̙̻̼̳̱̻̫̬͖̖́͐͆̈́̀͆́̌̋͗̓̓̌̉̀̅̆̿̇̎͐̑̿̄̏̄̕̚͘͜͜ͅͅ ̸̡̢̡̧̢̡̛͖̮͕͎͚̝̩̦̠͕̳̬̞̺̮̹̭̱̩͎̯͖͎̰͇͖̦͎̤̠̜͚̺̣̻̼̩̮̫̲̈́͊̃͐̅͂̈͛͆͛̊̈̎̓̐͌̌̉͋̋͛͋̓̆̏͐̇̏̈̈́̈́́͐̓̈̄͛̅̀̓͌̂̅̎̋̀͑̿͑̾͆͋͆̉̂̊͘̚̚͘͠͝͠ ̸̨̨̡͓̘͖͖̜̥̜̮̝̘̳̭͚͕̲̝͍̠̏̂͊̍́̈́̂̚͘͜͝͝ ̴̧̡̛̗̰̪̹͇̰̹̰̻͔̦̪̰͔̱̦͙̲͈͇͚̏̒̾͊͐̏̓̑̔͆̽̆̊̑͛̃̑͌̑̌̓̆̃̀͑̂̉̿̈́̐̿̎̃̈̽́̈̒̔̚͜͠͝͝ͅ ̵̛̛̹̫̘̩̱͍̬͓̹̭̑̃̅̊̈́͂̅̾̓̆͋̍͑̏̀͛̈̔̇̽͒̊̇̅͗͐̓́͐̃͌́̇̀͆͑̄͋͒͒̈̂͌̒̓̊͊̌̋̐̇̋͛̏̏̓͆͘̕̕͠͠͝͝ ̸̡̡̨̨̢̧̼̻̙̼̗̯͔̖͉̲̭̩͎̗͉̺̭̻͕̬̩̤̘̜̹̺̠͕͎̬͚̥̳̻̣̟͚̼̑͗̐́̆̇͜͜͠ͅͅ ̷̢̧̞̼̹̤̗̺̥̪̞̲͔͔̫͓̺̖̪̙͈̘̪̘̬̭̤̮͈͂̑̅̅̿̋̈́͋̀͑̄̽̉̑̒͌̒̊̎͋͌͋͗̈́̂̚͝ͅD̴̢̨̧̡̡̜͔͇̦͇͎̝̫̣̤̠͓̻̠͈̪̘̠̞̤͕̥̱͇̜̤͉͕̟̳̠̥͕̯͕͈̺̺̲̭̠̩͕̼̥̮̯͖̰͖͕̥͕͈̱̅̎͐͗̌̂̉̓͌̏̋̏̓̑̊͆̒͗̀̕͠͠͠ ̸̡̢̡͉̹̩͕̮̬̜̞̙͓͙̰͙͔͈̮̘͓̬̱̖̲͗̇͗̅̈́͒̄̏̅͋̃̀̈́͛̇͐̎̒̇͑̐̅̓̓͑̓̎̾̓̈́̀̚͠͝͠ ̷̧͍̹͍̰̝̜̺̝̥̲͎͆̒̓͗ ̴̧̨̨̢̡̧̨̡̨̢̮͖͉̣̳̭̭̮̦̠̻̙̩̪̤̤̹͖͚̣͖̗̮͉̩̝̮̱̤̝̝͈̩̓͐͆̔͒̐̎͛́̃͊̅̊̆̿͌͊̒̌̀̔̒͗͌̀̾̎̉͒̑̆̆̔͑̏́̍͐͒̔̊͗̈́̅͂̂̓̐̉͌̂͑̾̓̆̕̕̕̕͜͜͝͝͝͠͝͠͠͠͝ ̷̨̧̢̡̨̛̝͓̝̤̳̟̟̗͓̼͉͕̠̖͖̬̗̫̬̘̥̤̺̙̰̰̖͚͖̻̪̫͔̭̹̼̘̱͔̬̖̳̰̱͎̜͖̀̂͆̈͒̏̎̅̑̌̋͊̈̒͋͆̂́͂̒͛̍̒̈́͑̂̔͐̊̀̈́́̓̆͌̃͋̎̂̽͛̔̄͘̚͘̕͠͝ ̶͉̻̰̳͚̤̯̳̥̩̲͉̼̬̞͇͍̘̙̮̥̰̦̑̇̓̈́̒̊̌̇͊̏̾͂̓̄̌̃̾̿̐̈́͋̓͑̃͋͛͂̈́̍̾͆̃̇̽͒̓͑͋͗̎̏̄͌͊̏̑̍͊͊͋̑́͑͌̔͂̅̚̕̕̚̚͜͝͝͠ ̷̢̨̡̡̢̨̨̺̭͔̤̣̠̣̭̙̙̜͙͚̜̥̼̪͔̖̜̦͉̗̩̳̥͎̦̲̳̰̙̖͇̝̐̔̎́͂́̆͘͜ ̷̧̡̛̛̛̦͈̲͎͕͙̰̥̬̳̜̻̗͕̜̲̃̑̐̿̃̽̃̊͒̂̑̈́͑̉́̊̒͊͂͗̇̀̒͒͆̆͊̌͛͂̅̄̾͗̿̏̾͂͋̆̎̅́̅͗͋͛͌̓̈́̐̏͊̑̏͛̕͘͝͝͝͠͝ ̵̛̛̙̱͎̬͍̻̜͖̱͛̈́͛͛͌͐̿͛̃̍͑̔͑̌̊̾̃̌̑͋͐͂̓̒̂͊͐̆̕̚̚͝͝͠ ̸̩͎̇̍̆̽͊́ ̶̡̛͎̫̯͈̬̭̘̻̠̳̻̟̠̯͉̼̭̥̣͈̹̬̫̪̪̳̠̪̤̙̫̣̫̦̦̺̲̟͊̈́̂̒̈͛͑͊͌̐̐̾̒̆̽̀̒͐̒͐͌͆̓̃̓͊̂̃͒̽͑͛̽͋̂́̏̿̔̿̉͑̏͗̕͘͜͝͠͝͝͠͝͝ ̶̢̡̡̡̢̡̡̧̡̛͎͇̺̼̞̙̟͍̩̦̗̫̥͇͉͉̦̭͎̙̪̗̣̻̞̱̝͕̳̯͕̙̠̫̹̙̠̘̱͓̞̟͔̪̤͎̞̰̜̤͎͎̹̭̘͉̲̇̎́͊͌͋̾̀͂̊̑̓̐̍̽͊̎͆͂͑͗̄̇̔͊̉́̀̽̂̾͒̏̓͐̀͛͆̿͌̌́̇̐͂͊̂̿̐̀͂̓̎̔̐̇̈́̕̕͜͜͝͠͠͝͝͝͠͠ ̵̡̛͍̘̣̟̰͇̻̩̗̫͙̠̝̼͉͆̆̌̊̑̓̀̅̇̔͗͂̀͌̈́́͊̂̃̍͒̈́͗̽͌͗̉̉̋̀̅̅̈́̕̚͘͝͝ͅ ̶̧̧̡̢̡̡̨̛̞͕̤̮͖̘͉̣̯̻̹͓̙̙͕̟͉̬̥̬͓͔̟͔͓̫̮̘͙̣̤͇̝̜̱̭͔̩͖͉̗̻̣̖̹̩̉̑̔͋͒̏́̇͑̚͜͜͠͝ͅ ̶̧̢̡̧̛͚̰͇̠̞͕̗̹̦͙̻̮̝͕̰̣̩͇̮̝̞̜̥͎̥̫͉̩̖̞͇̠̰̜̣̙̤̫̠̗̞̭̣̦̮̹̦͖͈̳̪̘̩͈̗̇̈̂̏̈́̒̈́̈̂͛͗̿̋̏̃͛̑̌̑̓̏̾̈̅̓̄̂͛̀̓̌̈́̽̈́͑̈̎͋̕̕͜͜͜͜͜͝͝ͅ ̸̢̛͉͕͎̖͑͌̈́̔̍̆͐͊͑͒̈́̒̄̎̌̑̃́̅͌͗̆̐̈́͂̈́̃̎̈́͘̚̚̕͝͠͝ ̷̨̧̛͚̳̖̘͖͙̥̭̻̗͈̫͙͇͕͉̦̭͖̪͍̫͈̣̬͇̯͓̱͈̞͎̜̤̰̦͕͍̰͖͙͚̰͕̥̼̉͋̎̃͗̓̅̽͋̅̈́͑̒͂̈́̾̾̚͠͠ͅͅ ̴̢̨̢̛̛̫̬̖̥͈͓̳̰͓̝͉̬̩̱̻̳̥̳̻̻̘͎͆͊̈͗̌̒̐̈̈́̈̑̓̐̒͂̎̽̽́̍͋͂̑̏̏͋̓̄̈́̆͆̒̈́͋͂͆͊͋̃̓͐̽́̇͌̔͋̅̒̄̇̈́̀̏̄̍͘̚̚̕͘̚͜͝͠ ̸̨̢̧̡̡̢̛̛̛̖͖̘̗͚̤̮͍̜̻̬̬͎̺̰͇̼͔̯̳͚̖̥͖̬͕̺̟̱̲̜̳̟̣͚̣͈͎̦͚̣̝͖̬̻͉̟͓̗̮͎͖̹̬͇͓̬͛̓̈́̂̽̈́͐̔̃̏̐̊͋͗̍̌̾̋͋̑̈̎̓͆̍̑̎̈͊̇͑̓̓̀̀͐̽̂̄̐̏̑́̿̏̇͘̕͘͘͜͠͝͠ͅͅ ̶̨̛̖͉̜̩̭̥̦̳͈̘̟̥̯̱̌̈́̓͐̋̂̎̌̿̌̉̊̽́̂̾͒̑̋͐͐̎̽̆̾̓͂̚̚͠͠͠ͅ ̶̢̨̢̡̡̨̢̡̛̱̬͙̰̱̰͚̙̤̮̰̞̩̮͓͈̘̦̳̦̻̗̼͔̬̞̯̺̦̺̙̹͚͍͍̻̱̩͓̬̟͍͉̯̩̗̺͆̊̾̍͂̏̈́̎̓͂͒̅̓͛͌̈̅̏̈̃̾̓͆͛̓̔͜͝͝͠ ̸̡̢̨̛͎͇̘̪̺̩͔̺̠͈̩͕͍̞̻͎̯͚̳̙̝͓̮͚̼̬̟̹̦̣̹̭͖̞̜̞̰̣̰̭̳͕̥̪̞͕͇̭͇̙̣͓̳̤̗͑͒̊̅̄͒̈́͗̾̈́̏̄́͛͒͌͛̌̎̊̍͂̇̅͊͗̐̅̍̿̐͜͝ ̵̡̢̛̛̛̛̫̱̰͔̝͙̯̹̺͈̫̞̰̖̿͋̀̐̔͂͑̔͆̄̄͊̈́̅̈́̈̉̆̌̈́̒͗̎̈́̓͛̒̏̿̈̄͌͒̎̈̀͆̐̑͋̿̒̌̃̂̉͐̚͘̚̚̕͜͠͠͠͠͝͝͠ ̶̡̡̢̨͓̙̤̞͕̯̫̤̱͔̪͚̝̳͓̼̤͍̞̳͕̦̱͉͎̱͈͎̘͉̭͉̳̻͖͈̦̻̠̟̯̖̻̪̯̲̯̺̯̭͙̪͈̋͛͆̈́̑ͅͅͅ ̷̩̤͈͕̤̬̹̱̰̣̦̩̖͓̭͕̞̪͓̭͚̘̈́̎͌̊͒͑͛͗̈́́̿̈́̿͛̌̿͋̊̽̄͊̽͂̊̿͒̉̾̈́̒͐͛͋͊͗̓͋̀͊̾̑͐̀́̂̅̕̚̚̕͝͠͝͠͝ͅ ̵̡̢̧̛̛̛̻͚̥̰̫̖̫̱͍̟̬̖̘̠̼̘̻̙͔̺͚͓̪͔̬̫̹͙̜̳̫͔̀͊̆̀̈́̎̈͂̽̊̆͂̓̓͒͂͌͆̊̊̐͛̈̐̋͌̂̍̀̌͒̋̈́̏͆̅͊̚̕͠͝͝͠͝͝͠ ̸̡̛̛̙̙͇̺̫̣̯̍͛̆̿̃͒͛̐̓̓̋͛̄̍͋̍̌̔͑͂͗̍̏̅̀̅̄̋̽̔͐͒̎̒͒͆̄͋̅͛̃̊̃͛̔̈́̋͆̔͂̾̚̚̚̚̕͜͝͝͝͠ͅ ̸̨̨̨̧̧̛̛̻̺̬̙̰̗̝͖̰͎̱̳͈̬̫̮̞̯̰̣͉̹̩̰͚̩͖͍͇̝͔̘̲̬̩̳͓͓̬̤̣̝͈̹̞̯̗̟̙̬̗͓̤̞̾̊̽͑̔͊́̓̏̌͊̂̌͛̓͊̈́͗͗͆͆̇̃͗̇̽͗̌̓͘̕͜͜͜͠͝͝͝ͅͅͅ ̵̧͕͓͚͎̫̭̰͈͚͔̖̰̭̼͇̼͔̈́̈́̀̄̆͑̐͌̔̚͜͠ͅY̶̢̡̨̳̪͙̮̗̘̫̮̪͉̱͕̪͎̘̟̖̯͕̬͍̱̤͔̦̭̤͙͈͇͎̙̙͉̞̝̱͇̘̣̭̺̝͙͎̣̼̲̲̓̂̇͌̍̿́̈́̂͋̇̅͒̾̍͒͆̎͗̾͛͂́̌̿̓̍͐͊̑̃͛͆̔̊͊̃̀̎̈́̆̇̊̉͘̕̚͠͠͠͝͝͝ͅÉ̷̡̡̧̧̢̢̨̡̛̼̖̫̟͚̗̩̘̰̞̼̗̫̺͔̟̗̪͓̺̯̙͕̼͙̻̖̞̝̞̣̬̀̈̈́̿̽̾̀͊̐̄͆̔̈́͗̑́̏̾̈́̄̅̔̈́́͋̊͋̾͐̍͆̽̀͊̂̌̓̄̽̒͘͘̚͜͝

 

vorekiyo shingucci: kaito?

 

whattup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read is online

 

whattup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: holy fuck your glitched writing actually made my phone crash

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: haha big mood

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: anyways im fucking tired yall gn

 

holy fuck its sans undertale went offline

 

freeshovacadoo: ok but yes tsumugi i do want a gay tshirt

 

freeshovacadoo: my one chance of having a gay top

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: HFDJHGFDRTYHGFDESRTGHHGFDRSEDRFGHHGFDSW

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: BIG MOOD!

 

vorekiyo shingucci: wait angie

 

vorekiyo shingucci: miu’s not the top in the relationship?

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: are u kidding of course not

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: look at this wimpy skank meanwhile angie’s got the power of god and anime on her side

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: STOP TALKING ABOUT US HAVING SEX JFCCCCCCCCCC

 

vorekiyo shingucci: jesus fucking Christ Christ Christ Christ Christ Christ Christ Christ Christ Christ

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: stfu minion man

 

vorekiyo shingucci went offline

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: fukcfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckFUCKFUCKFUCK

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy went offline

 

yaint goin tuh heaven went offline

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: aw. now i’ve gotta update my board.

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: board??

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: my “___ days without someone mentioning minions to kiyo” board

 

nyahh :3: you actually have that?

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: yes

 

kaegay: can confirm

 

nyahh :3: how many days were we at?

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: 3

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: that’s the highest its ever been

 

naruto is my senpai: not surprised

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: …did miu just die

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: why did angie go offline?

 

yaint goin tuh heaven is online

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: sorry! my phone was having technical difficulties, everything is ok now! :D

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: wheres the cow??? >:3

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: call miu a cow again and atua’s wrath will strike you down

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: o

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: anyways miu is in her room, where else? :P

 

naruto is my senpai: …and kiyo?

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: ah, no worries.

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: H̶͎̦̏̾̓̃̀͌͐͆͂̅̕͝͝ ̵̡̨̧̛͍̤͍̘̣͚͇̳̤̆̾̐̑̎̕͜ ̸͓̻̥͋̀͐ ̸̡̲͖̘̈ ̶̹̠͖̼̣̣̜̍̑̈́̆͐̋ ̸͔̲̗̹̲̹̲̫̅̒̔͊͐̒̆͘ ̵̛͔̝͍̭͚͉̣̻̼̞͓̻͖̑̓Ě̶̳̝̳̱̖̆̂̍̊̏͗͠ ̴̡͉̪̱͓͙͈͊͗̈́͛̂̀̔̉̎̎́̒͝ͅ ̶̭͎̍̈̾͛̏̇̂͘̕̚ ̷̯̞̙̦̥̙̱͚͚̭̤̥͇͗̀̆ ̸͉̒͠ ̷͓̇̄͋͐ ̷̨̢̡̦̲̖̭̥̦̞̖̑͒͛̐́̽͘ͅ ̵̨͎̝̣̎͗͑̽ ̵̥̖̬̳̫̻͚̬̙̘̾̊ ̸̢̰̣̀͆͌̅̅̅̅͝ ̸̡̡̛͓̥̣̳̝̱͔͔̜̋̌͊̉̇͜͝ ̵̬̤̻̣̫͙̥̺͙̃̂̾͆̔̎̅̆̿̓̕ ̸̨̟̘͓̱̜̗͔͍͎̹ ̶̛͇͔͖͖̙̹̙̎͋͌̉́̈́̈́̊̔̇͐̎̕͜ ̷͖̤̮͉͍̗̜̳̟̇̌͑ ̴͙̮̐̐͊͑̊͂̎̑͗͘ͅĮ̵͖͍̪̗̟͔̜̫͔͙̯̎͗͆͐̾̍̈̎̂̊̐̒̓͜͝͠ͅ ̶̬̈́̄̆ ̴̛͓̝̓̈̄̋̓̏̓͑́ ̶̛͙͔̖̺̣̱͕̜̫̗̯̦̜͗͌͋͐́͛͋̚̕͘̚̕ͅ ̷̡̨̝̥͔̟̩̼̗͇̋ ̷̨͓͓͇̪̞̘̖̮̰̟̥̝̋̏͜͜ ̸̫͙̟̩͙̭̋̌͋͒̑͛̏̒̓̎͘ ̶̳͎͓̮͐͗́̐̔͑̃̆͛̉̄̄͒ ̵̧̗̩͖̮͖̑̋̂̇͛ ̶̧̡̢̦̎̌̊͋̆̈́̏̐Ş̸͉͖͚͉̜̣̜̖̫͑̅̉͐̔̓͋̀͂̈́̈́ ̶̲̱͓̠̘͙̙̻̭̀̑̈́̍͋̐̎́ͅ ̷͉̺̳͉͔͔̭̫͈̠̞̹̝͌͗̓͛̔̌̂͝͝ ̵͇͛̓̈́̂͐̓̈̌̃͠͠ ̶͔̦̟̻͓̘̗͈̟͈͚͑̍̈̌̾̎̓͜ͅ ̷̛̤͔͓̒͛̌̅͐̒̓̅̈́̂̅̀͘ ̷̨̧̗͉̦͈̤̗͓͙̤̤̣̝̅̅͛̆͛͜͠͝ ̶̧͖̏ ̸̟̩͚̈̄͊̐͑̆͑͒̓̌̈́͝ ̴̧̼̥͇̮̝͚̦̲̠̭̦̬̄̈́͐̌̈̊͛̿͐͋͠͝Ị̴̧̣̞̗̝̥͖͙͔̰̬̭̯̓͛̽̏́̊̚͜͝ ̸̧͍̰͎͔͇̜̦̞͊͒̏̇̆̿͛̅̒̚̚͠ ̶̡͎̱̜̪͚͎̤̮̟̤̻̊̉̅̍͊̉͠ ̸̛̗̱̞̻̳̱̤̯̔̿̄̎̇̒̍͘ ̸̛̱͈͔͙͉̫̫̤̮̮̦̀͊̇̔̇͌̂̋̑͝͝ͅ ̸͍̥̻̘̹͓͚̟̠̫̩̜́̈́̿̕̚ ̵̲̥͇̱̜̻̣̫͕̯͑͑̓̽̂͠ ̶̦̥͖̼̮̦͕̱̠̪̙̪̮̼̇͛̐̐͘ ̷̨̲͖̝̥̞̘̜̉̄̇N̴̨̢̯̤̘͔̦̦̜̼̓͌̍̑̐̆͒͑͛̔͘̚ ̴̛͇̝̑ ̷̏̍͒̽͊̓̃̈́̏͆̅̔ͅ ̸̨̨̨̳̳̼̟̳̞͕̬͎̝̺̲̍̎͛̕͝ ̷̛̲̞͉̜̮͔̔͑̑͒͊̈́͐̒̍̔͝ ̶̧̩̥̝͇̀̋̈́̄̈̌́̍̉̔͝ ̷̙͖͚͈̣̥̦̦̻̇̃̂͘ ̵̧͎̯̼̻̟̘̭̘͚͉͍̓ ̶̖̟͎̮̔́͂̉͝ ̶̡̳̰̳̙̼̤͆̉͑̎͛̃̽Ą̷̨̬͎͚̞̻̲̦̭͍̼̭͒̑ ̷̛͚̝͙̈̈́͌̍͋͊̈́̓̄͐̚͠ ̷̨̖͕͓̓̾̄̇͛̀̇̀͘͝ ̸̡̨̻̟̘̺̥̅̈́̈͂̍͜ ̴̬͓̯̭̟͖̞̱̖̻͓͊̅̽̈́͜ ̷̨̛̟̣̖̹̳̹͙̍͌̂̀͂̓̄̈́̉̾̚̕ ̷͕̩͔̲̜̰͓̎͒͐̈͆̌͗̚͝ ̷̼͔̍͂͗͛B̷̦͔̞̩̘̏̑̽͆̊̓͑̉̑̈́͝ ̵̗̙̠̫̩̯̻͊̀͝ͅͅẼ̷̢̲͉̤͙̫̞͎͚̪̣̲̤̟͑̃̋̎̈́͜͠ ̶̲̙̊͆̈́͗̊͐̍͘͝͠T̸̨͍̠̼̜̳̪̘͍̫̂͋̔̾͐͌̅͝ ̴̳̩̹̯̗̲̰̥̮̱̰͚͕̽͊̈̃̋T̸̜̻̥̻͚͖͇̳̠̹̝̒͌͂̿̔̑̒͘ͅ ̷̜̮̪͕̭̳͖̭͊̏̎̉͌̒̂̕Ẹ̸̡̢̧̛̻͕͖̭̹̲̺̤̝͈͛͛́̍͂̍͌͌͗̃̚͠͝ ̶̡̦͍̯̥͍̰̣̪̗̹̻̣̍͒̋͜͜͝R̵̪̖̭̉̊͒̓͆̆̆̏̚͝ ̷̛͈̻̮̦̖̞͛̔̑̂̋̍͑̕͝ͅ ̷̧̳̘̮̭͕͈̺̮̙̎̊́̃̽̔̓̃͌̅͂̀̏P̴̨̢͖̖͙̝̬̩̪̙͇̖̊̇́̈́͊͊̈́̃̕͜͝ ̵̛̪͎͙̲̳̹͖͇̩͉͍͚̖͙̜̾̔̅̌̐͠L̴̬̙̱̉ ̸̢̡̡̢̜̜̞͙͈̠̼̜̱̗̙͋̒͌͛̄̓͆̍̕̚Ą̷̖̰̂͛͂͛̓̈́͐͂̀̐̐͘̕͠͝ ̵̘̼͌̋͝C̸̢̯͎͈̣̈́͋̈́̏͗̇̍̊́̉̉̚ ̷̘̳̇͛͒͗͆̒ ̶̧̭̱̓̇͂̂͊̔̇̔̉̕͝ ̸̛͉̯̰̺͕̆̉̄̓͌͑̈́̓̒̇̑̚̕͠ ̵͎̭͉͍͉̭̣͔̳͕̫͐̊͊̽̅̇̍͒͌̕͜ ̵̨̠̲͎̬̪̇̇̍̓ ̷̧̧̧̰̣͖̦̥̞̪̫͈̤͖̄̃̅̚͜ ̶͔̠̟͖͉̣̳̄͋ ̶̹͖̲͙͈͍̳͙̺͈͍̇̿͋̈̊̂ ̷͕̥̬͙͓̺̜͚̟̥̈́͋͑̍̿̈́̃̇Ȩ̸͚̣̰̜̠̭͉̩͖̫͉͙͎͆̽̌̒̅̉͂̈̅̕̚̚ ̵̨̧͉͓͓͕̘͉̗̬̟̝̃̄̈́͒͝ ̵̦̼͓̼̅̉̃͑͊͆̋̽N̸̡̙̪͎͚͖̱̜̣̘̳̤͙͂́̚ͅ ̷͓̹̩̟̮̠̺̮͛͐́̇̒͒̄͛̕ ̸̢̺͓̻̯̱̝͕͚͇̈́̋̃̍̎̋̊̉̈́̍́̕͠ ̴̛̹̱̣͕̰̦͉̔̍̂̄̌̀̈́̎̕͝ ̶̗͕̘͇͇̭̯͈̯̿̐͗̈́̕ ̶͈̈́̊̑̎́̀̌̐̂͠ͅ ̸͎͙̗̹̭̲͕͕̜͎̄̈́Ö̸̧̢͕̻͓̞̞̖̬́̃̔ ̵̢̢̨̛̪̳̖͕̺̠̜̰͓̠̏̂̋̿̎͋̃̚͘͘ͅ ̶̛̬̬̳̪̣̦̰̗̥͔̳͛͋̈́̓́̏̈́͂̏̋̀̌ ̷̡̨̗̯̭̙̼̟̞̲̏͐̐̈́̇̈̈́̊̎͜͝ͅͅ ̶̢̦̖̟̩̭̗̍͌̈͋͌̿͊̃́̆̆͠͝ ̷̺͂̈́̌̍͘̚͠ ̶̧̦̪̙̙͚̼̘̈́̈̉̐͝W̶̗͊̿̀̑̄

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

---Friday, June 1st, 7:47am---

 

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: holy LORD

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: WHICH ONE OF YALL JUST SCREAMED LIKE A FUCKING MADMAN

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: WOKE ME UP FROM BEING THE BIG SPOON

 

whattup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: don’t lie ur obviously the little spoon

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: correct

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: HEYYYYYYYYYYY

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: ok but who did scream??

 

holy fuck its sans undertale is online

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: ANGIE I WILL NOT HESITATE TO FIGHT YOU

 

naruto is my senpai: what happened????

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: guess who i found

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: taped to my wall

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: A G A I N

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: :33

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: FDRTYJHGFERTYUHYDREWERTYUGYDRESW

 

freeshovacadoo: HGFDFDSERTGFDESWERTGFRDEWSERTGTREWSERTGFDSWERFDSWERTYHDSAQ

 

naruto is my senpai: AHHAHHAHAHHAHHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHhaHAHha

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: you taped kiyo to ryoma’s wall?? again??

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: yep!

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: i love you. lets get married

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy is online

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: AHEM

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: ANGIE I THOUGHT WE HAD SOMETHING

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: I WAS IN UR ROOM LAST NIGHT NOW YOURE CHEATING ON ME

 

nyahh :3: …I’m sorry, what?

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: uh

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: ah, I lied yesterday! sorry everyone! 3:

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: here is the full story:

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: knowing that kiyo was on his way to harm miu, i left my room.

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: i found him in the hallway, and gagged him.

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: kinky

 

kaegay: you say it so calmly what the fu

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: i then went to ryoma’s room to tape him against the wall.

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: without waking me up????

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: i carried you out to the bathroom in ur room and closed the door :)

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: i don’t weigh anything to you?

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: no, its like holding a few grapes

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: and you were curled in a ball like a sleeping cat

 

whattup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: JAHGAFAAFCDRTAYUQKJMA

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: then i went to see miu, and invited her to sleep in my dorm!

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: why?

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: i missed her :(

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: that’s code for “i was incredibly horny”

 

yaint goin tuh heaven kicked ouma wa mou shindeiru from the chat

 

yaint goin tuh heaven: fucka you

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: i love you so much

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: gay! wonderful

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru joined the chat

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru changed yaint goin tuh heaven’s name to horny! at the church

 

horny! at the church: god will not forgive you

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: payback ( ͡~ ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

naruto is my senpai: that’s the new miu x angie ship name

 

whattup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: holy shit!!! is that a motherfucking fall out boy reference???

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: …uh

 

freeshovacadoo: kaito u dumbfuck

 

freeshovacadoo: its obvs green day

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: guys,

 

naruto is my senpai: my chemical romance!!

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: guy s,,,,,

 

kaegay: EH

 

kaegay: EH

 

kaegay: EVANESCENCE

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: N O,,,,,,,,,,,,

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: u know what

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: its time for a username change

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: its been 162 days since a mass username change so

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: …hes right

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: exactly right

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: last time it happened was December 21st, 2017.

 

freeshovacadoo: wrow

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: anyways lets start! say goodbye to ur current usernames we switchin it up!!

 

ass ass in: finally good god

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru changed ass ass in’s name to sass ass sin

 

sass ass sin: ugh

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: that’s not even that different????

 

whattup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: how dare you, kokichi! D:<

 

whattup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: i got this, maki roll!

 

whattup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read changed sass ass in’s name to maki roll

 

whattup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read: >:DD

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: …

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: …hmm…

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru changed whattup im jared im 19 and i never fucking learned how to read’s name to nonthreatening feminist boy

 

nyahh :3: AHGFDAYHGFDAERTYUJZHGFDSRATYUJZHGFDSRATYUZHGFDEARYUZHGF

 

naruto is my senpai: HOLY SHIT

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: AHHAHAHHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHHA

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: HMPH

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: …what?

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: you know

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: “Im a nonthreatening feminist boy, come talk to me on Skype! talk to me on skype about your problems as a woman i sympathize i’m taking womens studies. I took women’s studies I know what ‘systematic’ means. Man I’m so horny today. Sorry. I’m sorry. I feel so bad. I just came out and said it. Inappropriate. What do you like to do when you’re horny? One feminist to another. Just normal feminist over here. What do you think of this unlabelled image of my cock? I sent it to you titled “image.PNG”. Are you surprised by its girth? I apologize. How rude of me. I’m so sorry. I really need to get better at this I’m sorry. I’m learning so much. All humans must go through growth and I know that better than anyone, I mean I’m in a women’s studies class right now. Liveblogging my women’s studies class.”

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: READING THIS HAS MADE ME INCREDIBLY ANGRY

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: JHGFEYUJHGFDERTYUJHGFDWUHGFDEWER$%YUHGFDW

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: FUCK YOUUUUUUUUUUUU

 

naruto is my senpai: kaito? you actually read that?

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: yeah ofc?

 

naruto is my senpai: but… i thought you were…

 

naruto is my senpai: jared….. 19…

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: oh GOOD LORD

 

freeshovacadoo: HESSSSSSSS NEVER FUCKINNNNG LEARNED HOWTO READD

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: anyways uhh

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru changed maki roll’s name to sassa ass ass sassy enee enee

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: i

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: what the fuck???

 

naruto is my senpai: GFDHGFDSERTYJHGFDSERTYHCSWE

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: whatever

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: lets just move on

 

kaegay: you’re taking this well?

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: yeah but im a tired bitch rn

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: give me a few hours before lose it

 

freeshovacadoo: maki goes HAM

 

naruto is my senpai: ham going MAKI

 

freeshovacadoo: ham me the ham maki

 

naruto is my senpai: get maki hammed

 

freeshovacadoo: maki rolled hamham

 

naruto is my senpai: h

 

freeshovacadoo: ham

 

nyahh :3: ok i must be really tired because this is making me laugh like crazy

 

freeshovacadoo: hamiko hameno

 

nyahh :3: JJJJJAJHGSAHJKajhfcaFIGFADWRTQYUIAKJHTRSDWFHQKA

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: himiko are you okay???

 

nyahh :3: ham not

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: ok so….

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: im just gonna take one for the team

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru changed i stuck my dick in an anthill once’s name to absolute unit

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: …really????

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: OH COME ON SOMEONE HAD TO DO IT

 

absolute unit: gonta no understand?

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: neither do i, big guy

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: OOOF FINE

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru changed absolute unit’s name to welcome to macdawnalds do you want a phucking beeschurger

 

kaegay changed welcome to macdawnalds do you want a phucking beeschurger’s name to beeschurger

 

kaegay: no swearing you little bitch

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: ugh

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: fine mom #2

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: anyways

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru changed kaegay’s name to spiders are kinda hot tbh

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: STOPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP

 

spiders are kinda hot tbh: K O K I C H I

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: CURSEDDDDDDDDDD

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: HOLY FUCKKKKKKKKKKKK

 

spiders are kinda hot tbh: HOW DARE YOU

 

naruto is my senpai: …kokichi is that a reference to kirumi?

 

mother hates all of you but kaede: oh

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: EYYEEHEHHEHEHHEHEHEHHEHEHHEHEHHEHEH

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu changed spiders are kinda hot tbh’s name to i thought you were american

 

i thought you were american: much better, thanks boo

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: yw

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: god you are no fun!!!!!

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: that’s not what you said last night

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: JJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJ

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: WROW

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: COUGHCOUGH COUGH UH MOVIN ALONG

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru changed mother hates all of you but kaede’s name to bohemian rhapsody, line 16

 

bohemian rhapsody, line 16: …what?

 

horny! at the church: i don’t get it.

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: google it up, shitlord

 

freeshovacadoo: ok so i looked it up and

 

freeshovacadoo: “mama, ooooo”

 

bohemian rhapsody, line 16: ah.

 

horny! at the church: OOOOOOH I SEE

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: bokichi u haven’t changed my name yet im disappointed

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: is that an invitation??

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: yeap

 

agar.io is basically just a vore orgy: give it your worst

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: can’t be any worse than the name you have now

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru changed agar.io is basically just a vore orgy’s name to build god, then we’ll fuck

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: now you and angie have matching names :3

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: HEELLLL YEAAAAHHHH

 

horny! at the church: divine!

 

freeshovacadoo: wow, two green day references!!

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: rant……..rantaro…….

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: please…… not again….. im not strong enough…….

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: hmm

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru changed freeshovacadoo’s name to homme d'herbe d'avocat

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: wHat?????

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: avocado weed man!!!!!

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: BITCH that translation is HORRIBLE

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: oh that’s cause i used google translate

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: im not half Eiffel tower like you ranty

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: hasghahHgfdt it SHOULD be “homme tabac avocat” or something similar

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: hon hon baguette

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: holy fucking chri

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: well whatevs

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: ill keep this name

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: GOOD!

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: who’s nexT?

 

instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster is online

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: perfect

 

instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster: i feel as if ive walked into something horrible.

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru changed instructions unclear, got my dick stuck in a toaster’s name to nerf bastion 2k18

 

naruto is my senpai: RTYUJHGFDERTYUJHGFDERTYUJHGFDERTYUJHGFDSWETYUJHGFDSWETY

 

naruto is my senpai: GOOD GOOD FINALLY A CAMPAIGN I CAN GET BEHIND

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: ARE YOU CALLING ME OUT

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: OF FUCKING COURSE

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: SINCE YOU WONT STOP USING BASTION

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: FUCKA YOU HIS BIRB IS CUTE

 

i thought you were american: oh my god he said birb

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: USE JUNKRAT OR SMTH

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: NO????? I DO WHAT I WANT

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: BITCH

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: DAMN

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: US BASTION MAINS BE OPPRESSED :((

 

nerf bastion 2k18: …i have no idea what’s going on but please do not use me as a vessel to make a statement against rantaro.

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: you can’t stop me

 

holy fuck its sans undertale: junkrat sucks I main Winston

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: y

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru change holy fuck its sans undertale’s name to sad little man

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: mood

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: beeg mood

 

sad little man: ugh

 

sad little man: i shoulda expected this

 

sad little man: can someone change it to something cat related? id much prefer that

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: ye ye i gotchu fam

 

sad little man: thank

 

build god, then we’ll fuck changed sad little man’s name to pussy lover

 

pussy lover: i am,,,,, a fool,,, a buffoon……

 

pussy lover: a moron…..,,,,..

 

bohemian rhapsody, line 16: That’s your fault for handing over the power to Miu.

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: NYAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAA

 

nyahh :3: oh shes laughing like angie!! gfs

 

horny! at the church: :DD

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: HEY TENNIS BALLS U WANTED SMTH CAT RELATED SO I GAVE

 

pussy lover: hmmm

 

pussy lover: no

 

pussy lover changed their name to sad little man

 

sad little man: back to depression

 

sad little man: back on my bullshit

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: alrightalright ANYWAYS

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru changed nyahh :3’s name to magic! magic! uwu

 

i thought you were american: MYSTERY SKULLS!!!!!!

 

magic! magic! uwu: I LOVE IT

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: OH YEAH I LOVE THAT SONGG

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: WHAT A BOP

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: …this name is acceptable

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: HAHA THANK YOU

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: …so no ones gonna mention the “uwu” huh

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: nope

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: understandable. have an incredible day

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: alright tenko your turn

 

i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep: plan your next move very carefully.

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru changed i want a stronk woman to kill me in my sleep’s name to tiddy sof and warm

 

tiddy sof and warm: …….valid

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: oh worm??

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: and on that same note

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru changed naruto is my senpai’s name to girl hot. watch naruto

 

girl hot. watch naruto: ANOTHER NARUTO USERNAME?? GIVE IT A RESTT

 

girl hot. watch naruto: THERES MORE ANIME THAN JUST NARUTO YKNOW

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: naruto? i think you mean

 

girl hot. watch naruto: don’t do it

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: boruto’s dad??

 

girl hot. watch naruto: that’s it

 

girl hot. watch naruto: rantaro weekly nail painting meetings are cancelled

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: AH FUCK

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: MY BEATIFUL SOLIDARITY

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: okoko so who’s left

 

vorekiyo shingucci is online

 

vorekiyo shingucci: I’m back

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: DDFGHGFDEJHDRERTYUJHGYRFDWERTYJHTRDE

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: I COMPLETELY FORGOT ABOUT YOU

 

sad little man: oh yeah

 

sad little man: i left my room this morning and didn’t take him down

 

sad little man: im in the living room rn i just heard a loud rip

 

sad little man: if my wall is chipped of paint AGAIN, i will NOT hesitate bitch.

 

vorekiyo shingucci: …im sorry, are you ryoma?

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: oh ye we did some username changes while you were TTRW

 

vorekiyo shingucci: TTRW?

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: Taped To Ryoma’s Wall

 

vorekiyo shingucci: ah

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: and you arrived just in time for me to change yours! :D

 

vorekiyo shingucci: then do it.

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: uhh

 

vorekiyo shingucci: what are you waiting for? change it.

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: ajjajjajjajajhshshhajjaj

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: okokk

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru changed vorekiyo shingucci’s name to im so fucking tempted to make a minion joke but i must hold back

 

im so fucking tempted to make a minion joke but i must hold back: wrong answer. you have 2 minutes

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: AHHAHAHHAHHASKSKAJHJHS SORRY SORRY

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: FUCK UHHH

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru changed im so fucking tempted to make a minion joke but i must hold back’s name to korky korky anthropology club

 

korky korky anthropology club: you were on thin fucking ice

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: hahaha sweats nervously

 

bohemian rhapsody, line 16: guys.

 

bohemian rhapsody, line 16: you should all be getting ready to go to class.

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: IN A MINUTE MOM

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: I STILL GOTTA CHANGE SHU’s NAME

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: w

 

im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu: oh no

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: shit

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru changed im kin with kirigiri no doubles uwu’s name to dick gumshu

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: get it? its an ace attorney reference! :D

 

dick gumshu: ….

 

dick gumshu: …i like it

 

ouma wa mou shindeiru: of course you do! :D

 

dick gumshu: now

 

dick gumshu: PERISH

 

dick gumshu changed ouma wa mou shindeiru’s name to grape panta on my tiny balls

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: HHHHHHOLY SHIT

 

girl hot. watch naruto: JHGFDRTYUJFDRTYUJHDERTYUJVCDERTYUJHGFDERTYUJN

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: TAKE THAT U LITTLE BITCH

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: BRO HOYLY FUCK

 

i thought you were american: OWOOWOWOOWOWOOWOOWOOWOWOOWOWO

 

horny! at the church: DIVINE!!!!!

 

tiddy sof and warm: AND THE DEGENERATE GOES DOWN!!

 

nerf bastion 2k18: I believe this is what you’d call, “being wrecked”

 

magic! magic! uwu: HAHHAHHSHHAHAHHAHAHHA

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: i have new respect for you, shuichi

 

beeschurger: what happen to kokichi?

 

korky korky anthropology club: RETRIBUTION

 

sad little man: JUSTICE RAINS FROM ABOVE

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: h

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: i hate this fucking family

Chapter Text

—-Thursday, June 14th, 12:48pm—-

 

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: hey everyone!!!

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: how yall doing???

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: eh

 

dick gumshu: alright

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: so, as you all know, tomorrow is the last day of school before summer break.

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: so it’s the last time we’ll all be together for 3 months.

 

beeschurger: :(

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: some of us live close together, but some of us are leaving, right?

 

horny! at the church: yes!

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: SO

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: to commemorate this

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: we’re doing smth

 

magic! magic! uwu: oh not a game

 

grape panta on my tiny ballsnah.. well sorta

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: so basically

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: each person here has to say what they’re doing over the summer, and also

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: say 1 thing about everyone else

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: so like. id have to say something about all 15 of you

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: hey, im down.

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: aight

 

tiddy sof and warm: …fine

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: and like. youre aloud to say smth funny but BLEASE be somewhat nice for everyone k. yes. even me.

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: k

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: hng

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: so. ill start.

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: i’m finally gonna see D.I.C.E. again!!

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: so u can’t visit me ;)

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: (except for shu, cause he’s smart and found the location!!!)

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: OK SOOO

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: KAEDE

 

i thought you were american: oh boy uh

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: this wlw/mlm solidarity we have is incredible and ur like,,, perfect??? like goddamn

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: you’re a great 2ndmom I lov u

 

i thought you were american: awww! ty wow I wasn’t expecting that

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: RANTARO

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: ur the memiest friend on the planet and ur downright annoying at times but id totally fuck you no homo tho

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: …thanks? hasghghas

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: kiyo

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: ngl you’re hella creepy but you getting taped to ryoma’s wall twice and scaring the shit out of him was the funniest fucking thing to ever happen at this school

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: also I have your minion rant framed on the wall of my room

 

korky korky anthropology club: …really?

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: TSUMUGI

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: ur a huge fuckin weeb and I don’t understand half the shit you say but you have good taste in anime men

 

girl hot. watch naruto: YOU ADMITTED IT

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: yep

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: naruto a snacc

 

girl hot. watch naruto: OH F U C K OFF

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: maki

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: I know you don’t like me. I don’t know how many times you’ve threatened to kill me, but it was a lot.

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: I know I annoy the hell out of you, but really, I do admire you.

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: You came out of a cold and dangerous place, but you still made efforts to befriend the people here.

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: You’ve been able to remove your mask, and I respect you for that.

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: So really, even if I may say something that annoys you, I truly look up to you.

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: what the hell

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: where are the memes

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: hm?

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: you’re supposed to say something funny

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: no, I’m saying how I feel.

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: …

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: …thank you…

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: what just happened

 

sad little man: that… holy shit

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: ANYWAYS NUMBER 15

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: there e is

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: MIU

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: You’re cool! A bit gross sometimes but still cool! And u and angie are couple GOALS

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: eyyyyyyyy ty man

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: ryoma

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: You’re strong as hell. I know dealing with depression is tough, but you’re so much tougher.

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: Just remember, you have friends that can help you.

 

sad little man: thanks, man. really.

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: kirumi!!

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: mom. the og mom.

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: You’re amazing for putting up with all of us, including me

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: I’m so happy you found a girlfriend who loves you as much as you deserve!!!

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: love ya

 

bohemian rhapsody, line 16: That’s so sweet, thank you.

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: keebs!

 

nerf bastion 2k18: …

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: Listen some of the stuff I have said throughout the year wasn’t the nicest

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: but I never want to make you uncomfortable

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: even though you’re a robot, you’re so human!! a marvel of science and robotics, but human!!

 

nerf bastion 2k18: Well, thank you :)

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: kaito

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: You’re like, my 2ndbest friend after Rantaro

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: Uhm you’re strong and honestly??? hot

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: W H A T

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: srsly

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: thanks I guess????

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: GONTA

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: GOD UR SO PRECIOUS WHEN YOU SMILEEE

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: BEST BOY GREATEST BOY I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!

 

beeschurger: thank you!!! :D

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: angie!!

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: uhm… I don’t really talk to you that much but you’re cool

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: and you draw????? so good??? like WOW

 

horny! at the church: atua thanks you!!

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: himiko!

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: short person solidarity also wlw/mlm solidarity

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: also you’re always tired, which is, like, a mood

 

magic! magic! uwu: nyeh

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: tenko!

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: both of us are violently homosexual so that’s good

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: I know I’m a degenerate male but I do think you’re cool

 

tiddy sof and warm: ……..well, thanks

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: and now.

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: I saved the best for last.

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: Shuichi

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: god, I just….. I love you so much???

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: when you told me you liked me I nearly died because I never thought someone could think of me that way

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: And I had a huge crush on you but I was just the annoying lying kid so I never thought…

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: but these last months with you have been the greatest time of my life

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: you’re smart, sweet, kind, shy but you’re so perfect and I just

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: I love you so fucking much. Really.

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: You’re my world <3333333

 

dick gumshu: i

 

dick gumshu: i

 

dick gumshu  went offline

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: oh my fucking god he fuckin dead

 

grape panta on my tiny balls  went offline

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: oh my fucking god hefuckin dead

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: shuichi just sped by my room at top speed

 

bohemian rhapsody, line 16: he bolted out the door at an alarming velocity.

 

girl hot. watch naruto: looking out the window, he’s running to schoolhouse??

 

girl hot. watch naruto: tf is he doing?? escaping??

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: nah

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: i’m in the quad right now and he just appeared, made direct eye contact with kokichi

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: … and they’re kissing now

 

nonthreatening feminist boy  sent an image

 

girl hot. watch naruto: AWWWWWWWW

 

i thought you were american: :D!!!!!!!!

 

magic! magic! uwu: CUTE

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: SOMEONE JUST YELLED “YASSSSSS QUEEEEEN”

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: JHFSJHGAYUJHGSFRTYUAJHGF BOOD

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: I’m not sure who it was but I think it was Junko

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: SKJSJHAGHJHGSHJKA IT WAS JUNKO

 

grape panta on my tiny balls i s online

 

dick gumshu  is online

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: holy shit that was an out of body experience

 

dick gumshu: I don’t even run that fast in gym class

 

i thought you were american: god yall are gonna kill me

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: ok so… lets continue!!

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: hmmm…

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: Angie, you go!

 

horny! at the church: :o

 

horny! at the church: ok!

 

horny! at the church: kokichi, you are a sinner because you lie, but I forgive you because Atua forgives you! <33

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: well damn uh……shit lmao

 

horny! at the church: Kaede’s music pleases Atua very much! You are clearly blessed with music! :DD

 

horny! at the church: Tenko, you are such a good friend! You’re very nice! I like you a lot!

 

tiddy sof and warm: awwwwww ILYSM!!!!!!!

 

horny! at the church: himiko is the cutest little thing! I love you!!

 

magic! magic! uwu: :3

 

horny! at the church: Kiyo, you scare me at times, but you are very smart and cool!

 

horny! at the church: Tsumugi, thank you for introducing me to some new shows!

 

horny! at the church: Ryoma, you are so strong! And brave! <33

 

sad little man: why am I cryign in the club rn

 

horny! at the church: Kaito, you are so enthusiastic! :DD

 

horny! at the church: Maki, you are tough! And cool!

 

horny! at the church: Shuichi, you are so CUTE!!!

 

dick gumshu: ahha,,… thanks

 

horny! at the church: GONTA! I LOVE YOU!

 

beeschurger: thank you! :DD

 

horny! at the church: keebo, you are awesome!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

horny! at the church: Rantaro! You must stop smoking weed, though I still love you!

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: OH FFS

 

horny! at the church: Kirumi, mother, thank you for dealing with our shit!

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: YOOOOOOOOO DID SHE JUST SWEAR

 

horny! at the church: n so what if I did bitch

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: DAMN

 

horny! at the church: ok! Now for the last one!

 

horny! at the church: MIU!

 

horny! at the church: MY LOVE, MY ANGEL!

 

horny! at the church: You are the greatest and prettiest person I’ve ever seen!

 

horny! at the church: I have seen countless works of art, but you are by far the most gorgeous! no painting could encapsulate your beauty <3

 

horny! at the church: I am so sorry that I can not be with you this summer, but i will message you every day!!!!

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: h

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: im fcucking crying

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: ANGIEEEEEEEEEE

 

horny! at the church: I love everyone very much!!! <<<33

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: holy shit Ange i would die for you

 

horny! at the church: you will.

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat:

 

build god, then we’ll fuck:

 

korky korky anthropology club:

 

dick gumshu:

 

nonthreatening feminist boy:

 

i thought you were american:

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee:

 

sad little man:

 

beeschurger:

 

nerf bastion 2k18:

 

magic! magic! uwu:

 

tiddy sof and warm:

 

bohemian rhapsody, line 16:

 

grape panta on my tiny balls:

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: anyways, moving on,

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: @i thought you were american square up bih

 

i thought you were american: oh man

 

i thought you were american: uhhh my parents aren’t home for 2 weeks so im gonna be home alone

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: you’re rich, right??? live in a mansion??

 

i thought you were american: i wouldn’t call it that.

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: kaede ive seen your house its HUGE

 

i thought you were american: ANYWAYS

 

i thought you were american: so ill start with shuichi!

 

i thought you were american: you’re my bestttttt friend!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!

 

dick gumshu: <33

 

i thought you were american: :DD!!!! <333

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: ew

 

i thought you were american: kokichi you’re annoying but, like, you’re the little bro i never had

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: OH SHIT!!!!!!!! TY

 

i thought you were american: rantaro. buddy.

 

i thought you were american: solidarity

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: YEAAAAH!!!!

 

i thought you were american: uhhhhh tenko

 

i thought you were american: the most greatest and chaotic lesbian I’ve ever met

 

tiddy sof and warm: MY HEART IS FULL OF LOVE FOR KAEDE AKAMATSU!!!

 

i thought you were american: gonta

 

i thought you were american: i would die for you

 

beeschurger: please do not D:>

 

i thought you were american: ryoma

 

i thought you were american: you’re so cool and strong!!!!!!!!

 

sad little man: :)

 

i thought you were american: MAKI!!!!

 

i thought you were american: GOD MAKI I LOVE YOU WHAT THE FUCK!!!!

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: awww :)

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: *snaps a pic*

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: yup, this ones going in my cringe compilation >:3

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: school ends tomorrow do not make me kill you

 

i thought you were american: kaito!

 

i thought you were american: space is cool, i agree with you

 

i thought you were american: just know that if you n maki didn’t end up dating I would be in a nice relationship with both maki and kirumi

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: not wrong

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: :’)

 

i thought you were american: hey kiyo

 

i thought you were american: I know we joke that you’re scary but 1. you totally are 2. i do actually think you’re cool!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

i thought you were american: ang n miu are the most chaotic fucking couple in existence jfc

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: true

 

horny! at the church: true

 

i thought you were american: himi is so fcuckig cute im quaking,,,,,,,…,

 

magic! magic! uwu: :3

 

i thought you were american: @girl hot. watch naruto you’re sexy

 

girl hot. watch naruto: KHSXKXAJHGJHJZAHSJAHHJGSHKJHGHJ!!!!!!!

 

i thought you were american: keebo you’re jusT!! I LOVE YOU

 

nerf bastion 2k18: o////o

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: holy fuck keebo just used an ADVANCED emoticon!!!

 

i thought you were american: anyways last but not least

 

i thought you were american: MY FUCKING GIRLFRIEND!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

i thought you were american: CAUSE HOLY SHIT I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

i thought you were american: KIRUMI BABYYYYYY I LOVE YOU

 

i thought you were american: YOU’RE THE GREATEST PERSON EVER AND YOU MEAN THE WORLD TO ME!!!!!!!!!!

 

bohemian rhapsody, line 16: I love you two <33

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: she added two 3s

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: thats genuine love right there

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: whats that noise??

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: yooo is kirumi crying??

 

bohemian rhapsody, line 16: ah, no, that would be kaede.

 

i thought you were american: im jsut,,,,,, so full of love.,,.,,…for my glrirlfriend,,ddd,,

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: same!!

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: AIGHT NOW

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: KIYO YOURE UP

 

korky korky anthropology club: ah. very well.

 

korky korky anthropology club: I will be visiting a village rich with culture, to further my studies into anthropology.

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: and hopefully discover a new potential kink

 

korky korky anthropology club:

 

korky korky anthropology club: bare with me, I’m not the best with expression.

 

korky korky anthropology club: tenko, himiko, you seem to tolerate me to an extent. so do i.

 

tiddy sof and warm: do i?

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: :/

 

tiddy sof and warm: h

 

korky korky anthropology club: kaede, kirumi, and shuichi, your talents are marvelous. you are all very skilled.

 

bohemian rhapsody, line 16: Thank you.

 

dick gumshu: <:)

 

korky korky anthropology club: ryoma, you are the person I tolerate the most here.

 

sad little man: glad to hear it.

 

korky korky anthropology club: Miu, it pains me to say that the only thing about you that interest me in the slightest are your wild but questionable sexual fantasies.

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: BITCH??????????????????????

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: JSKJHGSHJAHGYHAJHGAKJHJGHA UHHH THANKS I GUESS

 

korky korky anthropology club: angie, I have not forgiven you, and I doubt I ever will.

 

korky korky anthropology club: I don’t think I need to specify what I am talking about.

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: no no, please do.

 

horny! at the church: >:3

 

korky korky anthropology club: I will not.

 

korky korky anthropology club: Gonta, your oblivious innocence is truly astounding, considering who it is you live with.

 

beeschurger: Gonta no understand?

 

korky korky anthropology club: exactly my point.

 

korky korky anthropology club: Rantaro, it was interested talking about the many places you’ve visited.

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: :DDDD

 

korky korky anthropology club: Maki, your take-no-shit attitude is remarkable.

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: thanks

 

korky korky anthropology club: though I must wonder how you ended up with a boy like Kaito.

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: WH

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: I gotta wonder sometimes, too.

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: WH??????

 

korky korky anthropology club: tsumugi, the anime you watch was interesting to view, I suppose.

 

girl hot. watch naruto: thats a win!!

 

korky korky anthropology club: Keebo, we were never able to connect.

 

korky korky anthropology club: my talent revolves on studying humans, which you are not.

 

nerf bastion 2k18: D:<

 

korky korky anthropology club: though, you are… interesting to observe.

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: creepy.

 

korky korky anthropology club: you, kokichi, are insufferable.

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: tell me smthing i dont know bitch!!

 

korky korky anthropology club: though your behaviour is quite an anomaly, which is entertaining to monitor.

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: even creepier but thank!!

 

korky korky anthropology club: and that’s the end.

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: alright damn

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: yo space man your turn

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: hell yeah!!

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: Im goin home to my grandparent’s place! i’ll also be studying more space stuff! >:)))

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: SHUICHI MY BRO! You’re the greatest sidekick!!

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: I’m so proud of how far you’ve come! :D

 

dick gumshu: sniff….. ty….

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: Maki Roll!

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: I love you! And you’re so strong and capable, always putting me in my place when I say something wrong!!

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: You’re awesomee!!!

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: ….thanks :)

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: Kokichi, you can be cool sometimes.

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: im hurt

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: Tsumugi, voltron watching sessions were awesome!

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: season 6 comes out in 2 days, wanna get together and watch it at my place?

 

girl hot. watch naruto: OH SHIT HELL YES!!!!!

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: sweet!!

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: Rantaro!

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: i still dont know if you have a dick piercing or not

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: ??????????WH

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: AHAHHAH YOU’RE COOL THO!!

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: Ryoma, buddy, you’re tough as hell! I believe in you, buddy, you will get better!

 

sad little man: hnGG

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: Gonta, bro, you’re so big n full of love!!!!!

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: Kaede your music is kickass!!!!!!

 

i thought you were american: THNKSS

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: ‘rumi you deal with so much shit on a daily basis

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: but you still manage to stay sane!!

 

bohemian rhapsody, line 16: you think I’m sane?

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: hheh,,,, uh

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: tenko, ange, himi

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: name a more iconic trio. ill wait

 

horny! at the church: :DDDDDDDD

 

tiddy sof and warm: hmph

 

magic! magic! uwu: nyeh, ty

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: Miu!!!!!!!!!!

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: you make me question so much shit but you’re still cool!!!!

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: Kiyo!

 

nonthreatening feminist boy:

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: i actually dont know what to say

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: uh

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: keep being weird??

 

korky korky anthropology club: you got it

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: keebo!!! keep learnin!!!!

 

nonthreatening feminist boywas that everyone??

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: yepyep!

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: awight maki your turn

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: ugh

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: I’m not doing anything during the summer.

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: really?

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: I’ve nowhere to go

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: I can’t go back to the orphanage

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: then come with me!!

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: what?

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: you can stay over at my place!!!

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: my grandparents would be thrilled to have you over!!

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: …

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: …I don’t know.

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: you don’t have to if you dont want to!

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: …ill… think about it.

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: in the meantime

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: @nonthreatening feminist boythanks for the great year, babe

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: >:D!!!!!!!

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: uhh

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: @i thought you were americanlove you too

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: @magic! magic! uwui would fucking kill for you

 

magic! magic! uwu: :3

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: i wanna squish your cheeks

 

magic! magic! uwu: :33

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: what the fuck

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: @grape panta on my tiny balls*cocks gun*

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: haha you said cock

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee:

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: Kiyo you’re a goddamn weirdo

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: But you’ve threatened to kill half the class so you’ve earned my respect

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: uhhhhhhh im not good with this

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: miu

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: fuck you

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: but like in a nice way

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: ??????????????

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: aight then

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: angie your religion is weird

 

horny! at the church: thank you!!! :DD

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: that

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: nvm

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: tenko you hate degenerate males, which means you hate kokichi and thats? valid

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: DSID YOU JSUT SAY VALID

 

tiddy sof and warm: >:DDDDDDD

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: uhm

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: Kirumi you’re not annoying, so you’re cool

 

bohemian rhapsody, line 16: thank you?

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: Keebo, Rantaro, Gonta, I don’t talk to you that often but you’re all pretty nice

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: ryoma you are incredibly relatable

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: i, too, want to die 24/7

 

sad little man: eyyy

 

dick gumshu: guys thats,,,, not healthy,,,

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: shuichi I would rob all the stars from the sky to make you happy

 

dick gumshu: :’D

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: Tsumugi, you’re… actually one of the nicest people here

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: thanks for being tolerable

 

girl hot. watch naruto: !!!

 

 

 

//

 

Private Conversation

 

amams and tsu

 

amams: tsumugi I see you frm across the room

 

amams: why are you blushing??

 

//

 

 

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: k maki you’re done!

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: oh thank god

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: and uhh

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: Kaito?

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: hm??

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: i’ll take you up on your offer.

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: HELL YEAH!!!

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: THIS IS GONNA BE GREAT!!

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: awww thats so cute!!!! :DD

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: we’ll discuss this later, maki roll!!

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: ANYWAYS

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: hhhhhhmmmmm who’s next???

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: ranty! your turn!

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: oh yay

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: so uhhhh this summer im going to europe, i’ve got relatives there n you know

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: OK NOW ILL START WITH KOKICHI

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: ur like,,, my best friend! i’d say you were like a brother to me but only ten minutes ago you said, and i quote, “i’d totally fuck you no homo tho”

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: eh eh

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: SHUICHI

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: i would kill for you also i lowkey had a crush on you at one point

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: you have good tastes

 

dick gumshu: WAIT WH

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: TSUMUGI!!!

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: you have no idea how many cis straight people i have pissed off while showing off the nails you painted for me

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: bcuz apparently males can’t paint their nails without being gay

 

girl hot. watch naruto: that is the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me

 

dick gumshu: but you are gay?

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: sure am

 

dick gumshu:

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: kaito my bro!

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: totally had a crush on you at one point but like you’re a chaotic dumbass

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: and you aren’t?

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: OOOOOF

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: SHUT THE FUCK OFF KAITO

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: YOU JUST SAID YOU HAD A CRUSH ON ME AT ONE POINT

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: OK UHHHH ANGIE

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: cryptic queen, we stan

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: tho i feel like if i were to die, it would be because you killed me

 

horny! at the church: yep!

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat:

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: …..m,,,,,…,,maki

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: you could kill be an id thank you. love you!!! keep fighting!!

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: kiyo I had a lowkey crush on you at one point n now you’re just the cryptid cryptic king

 

korky korky anthropology club: ???thanks???

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: good LORD how many crushes did you HAVE

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: ah but crushing on literally every boy you’ve ever laid eyes on is peak gay culture

 

tiddy sof and warm: nah nah

 

tiddy sof and warm: crushing on every girl you’ve ever laid eyes on is peak lesbian culture!

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: nah thats just tenko culture

 

tiddy sof and warm: >:O

 

magic! magic! uwu: JSHJSHGDHJSHGHJHGDUJSHGYHSHUG TRUE

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: mom!

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: sorry you have to deal with kokichi, you’re awesome!

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: wtHAT THE FCUCK

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: himiko, tenko, ur like my lesbian sisters

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: kaede, kirumi, my lesbian moms

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: my ever expanding legion of lesbian family members

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: i would say miu n angie are my lesbian aunts but they’re both pan and i have actual lesbian aunts sooo

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: GONTA!

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: might’ve had a crush on you at one point too hah LOVE YOUU

 

sad little man: expected nothing less

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: LOVE YOU TOO RYOMAA

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: and…..,. keebo…,,

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: let me guess, you had a crush on him too?

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: ….

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: ……..yeah……..

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: and……..i still………….do

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: w

 

dick gumshu: o

 

grape panta on my tiny balls:WHHWHHWHWHWHHWHWHHWHHHWWQI WAitAtAt

 

i thought you were american: YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

 

horny! at the church: OWO??????

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: OOOEOEOOEOEHHEIOEOEOIEIOEIIOOIEOIEE

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: soooo this is me asking you out, i guess???

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: :’)))

 

nerf bastion 2k18: i

 

nerf bastion 2k18: i

 

nerf bastion 2k18: w

 

nerf bastion 2k18: hhnjhg

 

nerf bastion 2k18: iiiiii

 

nerf bastion 2k18: DOES NOT COMPUTE

 

nerf bastion 2k18  went offline

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: shit he dead

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: OH MY GOD???????

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: some of keebo’s functions are linked to his school pad so he can see n send messages from his head

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: sooooooo good job ranty you literally made him break down what the fuck!!!

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: SHITSHITSHIT

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: UHHHHHHHHH

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat  went offline

 

girl hot. watch naruto  went offline

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: this could end two ways

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: keebo fucking dies,

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: or toko has some fodder for her abstract fetish porn folder

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: her W  H  A  T

 

magic! magic! uwu: SHUT THE UP!!!!!!!

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: IM GONNA FUCK YOU

 

dick gumshu: ???????????????????

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: ??????????????????????????????

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: FUCK YOU UP IM GONNA FUCK YOU UP

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: disappointing :(

 

sad little man: thtis is getting out of hand

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: aight so since rant is out of commission,,,

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: uhhhhh

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: himiko you go!!

 

magic! magic! uwu: nyeh. fine

 

magic! magic! uwu: not really doing much of anything this summer, im going home

 

magic! magic! uwu: unlike you all im gonna start with the love of my life

 

magic! magic! uwu: tenko if anything happened to you i would kill everyone

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: ….and then yourself?

 

magic! magic! uwu: no

 

magic! magic! uwu: because that would make tenko sad

 

tiddy sof and warm: HHHSSBSBSBBSBSBHBHSBHSBHJNSJSBHSHSSHBSHBHSBSBHSHBSBHBSHBSBHSBHBSHBHSBSBHBSHBHSBHSBHBSBHSBHSBHBHSBHSHBHSBHSBHBHS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: lmao gay

 

tiddy sof and warm: HIMIKOOOOOOOOOOOOO AHAHHAH <33333333333333333333333

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: you triple gay

 

i thought you were american: no u

 

tiddy sof and warm: no u

 

magic! magic! uwu: no u

 

sad little man: no u

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: no u

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: no u

 

dick gumshu: no u

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: roblox death noise bass boosted

 

magic! magic! uwu: nyehxt are my moms

 

magic! magic! uwu: both of u are hecking valid

 

i thought you were american: <3!!!!!!!!!

 

bohemian rhapsody, line 16: :)

 

magic! magic! uwu: angie ur my bestbest friend

 

magic! magic! uwu: also valid

 

horny! at the church: :DDDD

 

magic! magic! uwu: miu

 

magic! magic! uwu: ur gross but, like, valid

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: i get that a lot

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: not the valid part tho

 

horny! at the church: :(((((

 

magic! magic! uwu: rantaro

 

magic! magic! uwu: i believe in you buddy CLAIM that robo-ass

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: SJKKHKSHHSSKJS!!!!!!

 

magic! magic! uwu: gonta!

 

magic! magic! uwu: baby boy. baby

 

magic! magic! uwu: kokichi!

 

magic! magic! uwu: evil.

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: unfair this is bullying

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: okok nvm she just dmed me saying she thought of me like a brother <333

 

magic! magic! uwu: DONT EXPOSE M

 

magic! magic! uwu: uuuhhhuh anyways

 

magic! magic! uwu: keebo

 

magic! magic! uwu: claim that avocado!!!

 

magic! magic! uwu: ryoma

 

magic! magic! uwu: short person solidarity

 

magic! magic! uwu: shuichi

 

magic! magic! uwu: nyeh…… toll

 

dick gumshu: im not that tall though :’)

 

magic! magic! uwu: kiyo

 

magic! magic! uwu: you look like a pine tree

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: ???

 

korky korky anthropology club: not wrong.

 

magic! magic! uwu: maki, lowkey?? had a teensy crush on you at one point

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: its mutual

 

magic! magic! uwu: @nonthreatening feminist boyfucka you it couldve been great

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: AKKJSJKAKJSAKKHKHASASHHS SRRY???

 

magic! magic! uwu: lmao jk i couldnt be happier <333

 

tiddy sof and warm: <333

 

magic! magic! uwu: umm… tsumugi is last I think

 

magic! magic! uwu: loved our weekly anime sessions!!!

 

magic! magic! uwu: i officially am in love with mina ashido

 

girl hot. watch naruto  is online

 

girl hot. watch naruto: SSKJJHHJAJGA MOOOOOOOOOD

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: eyyy mugi ur back from the dead!

 

girl hot. watch naruto: i was busy checking on amiibo

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: ???

 

girl hot. watch naruto: amami x kiibo

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: but we call him keebo?

 

girl hot. watch naruto: shut your up cock itchy

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: WHWHHWHATTATTTTTTTTT

 

girl hot. watch naruto: ANYWAYS

 

girl hot. watch naruto  sent an image

 

girl hot. watch naruto: looks like we’ve got a new couple on our hands :)

 

i thought you were american: AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW YISS

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat is online

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: ok which one of you is screaming “YEAH BOIIIII” at the top of your lungs

 

dick gumshu: not to snitch but

 

dick gumshu:@grape panta on my tiny balls

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: exposed lol

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: anyways yeh, me n keebo r gay, keep scrollin

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: soo! couple recap!

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: bestest couple ever (me n shu <3), the straight one, art hoes, avocadoes n robots, BIGGGG lesbians, moms

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: anybody else!!

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: did you just call me n kaito the straight ones??

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: i am APPALLED

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: you used a big kid word! i’ve taught you well!

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: maki has a teacher/student kink pass it on

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: i will kill you with my bare fucking hands do not test me

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: eheum ANYWAYS

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: so gonta, ryoma, tsumugi and kiyo are the only singles left

 

sad little man: …

 

sad little man: …actually

 

sad little man: uh

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: ??

 

sad little man: i’m dating gonta.

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: hhUHHH

 

beeschurger: :DD

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

 

horny! at the church: OWOWOWOWOOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOOWOWOOW

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: *pretends to be shocked*

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: >:O!!!!!!!!!

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: SMALLEST BOI IS DATING TOLLEST BOI

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: never say that again or im breaking all 12 of ur kneecaps

 

girl hot. watch naruto: WAITT SO IM THE ONLY SINGLE PERSON????

 

girl hot. watch naruto: WHO AM I SUPPOSED TO DATE NOW????

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: what about kiyo

 

girl hot. watch naruto: no offence kiyo but i would literally rather die

 

korky korky anthropology club: no offence taken. though i am pan, I find myself uninterested in dating.

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: just date someone else from either happy or super!

 

girl hot. watch naruto: so many of them are in relationships already tho :(

 

girl hot. watch naruto: i was sorta interested in junko but she and celeste have some unresolved sexual tension sooo

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: SJHJKJHSGHJSKJ TRUUUU

 

girl hot. watch naruto: plus my crush is already in a relationship :(

 

girl hot. watch naruto: wait

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: OHOHO WHATS THIS?? :O

 

girl hot. watch naruto: NEVERMIND UHHHH NOTHING

 

girl hot. watch naruto went offline

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: OOOOO NO YOU DONT

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat went offline

 

dick gumshu: i suggest we just… continue

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: hmmph

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: alrighttt

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: who wants to go next? >:3

Chapter Text

---Thursday, June 14th, 2:23pm---

 

Conversation between fuckin weed and anime

 

 

 

fuckin weed: YO

 

fuckin weed: whered you go??? I literally can’t find you anywhere

 

anime: im hiding in shame

 

fuckin weed: awwww come on tsu!!

 

anime: I SAID SOMETHING I SHOULDN’T HAVE UGHH

 

anime: NOW I GOTTA EXPLAIN IT

 

fuckin weed: if you want, I can say it for you?

 

anime: rantaro, buddy, soul bro,

 

anime: I just don’t want anyone to know.

 

anime: she can never know……

 

fuckin weed: ah. so this IS what this is about.

 

fuckin weed: listen

 

fuckin weed: you’re going over to kaito’s soon, right??

 

anime: yeah why

 

anime: OH SHIT

 

fuckin weed: YEEP

 

fuckin weed: so, if you want this to be over,

 

fuckin weed: tell her then.

 

fuckin weed: she is staying over with him, after all.

 

 

 

 

 

---Thursday, June 14th, 2:23pm---

 

The REAL Disaster of the Ultimate Academy

 

 

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: big boy gonta you go

 

beeschurger: !!!

 

beeschurger: gonta is spending summer in cottage in forest!

 

beeschurger: will study bugs! :D

 

beeschurger: gonta not good at expressing feelings as much as gonta wants, so gonta will address everyone!

 

beeschurger: gonta loves everyone! gonta is so happy he could meet all of you, you are gonta’s bestest friends ever! :))

 

beeschurger: but gonta especially loves ryoma! :D

 

beeschurger: you come long way out of your cocoon, and make friends with everyone!

 

beeschurger: gonta is so proud of you! <33

 

sad little man:

 

sad little man: i

 

sad little man: brb

 

sad little man went offline

 

nonthreatening feminist boy is online

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: yo @sad little man wtf you crying so damn loud for

 

i thought you were american: scroll up

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: ah

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: that’s fair. id cry too

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: living up to his username it seems

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: so uh

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: I guess gonta’s done

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: @build god, then we’ll fuck hey thot

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: FUCKKKK YOU JUST CALL ME??????

 

horny! at the church: do not be angry, miu! :D

 

horny! at the church: there was an Egyptian god whose name was pronounced thot!

 

horny! at the church: he is merely comparing you to the ethereal presence of a god! <33

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: ah

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: well duh >:D

 

i thought you were american: she’s blushing

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: FUCK OFF BAKAMATSU

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: ANYWAYS I GUESS ITS MY TURN SOOOO

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: THIS BITCH IS GOIN OVER TO PROF IIDABASHI’S TO STUDY HIS WORK IN ROBOTICS

 

nerf bastion 2k18: this is true!

 

nerf bastion 2k18: we will be ‘hanging out’ together a lot in this time!

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: YEP

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: K SO ILL START WITH KEEBS

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: YOURE THE GREATEST HUNK OF METAL ON THE PLANET!!!!

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: wtf isn’t that robophobic

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: KOKICHI YOU’RE ACTUALLY, LIKE, MY BEST FRIEND SOOOO

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: im honoured!!!

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: UHHH WHO’S NEXT

 

 

 

//

 

 

 

---Thursday, June 14th, 2:27pm---

 

Conversation between detective pickashu and grass type

 

 

 

detective pickashu: is tsumugi ok?

 

grass type: I’m texting her, but I can’t physically find her. at all.

 

detective pickashu: oh dang

 

detective pickashu: do you know why she ran away upset?

 

grass type: sorry dude, can’t say.

 

detective pickashu: I understand.

 

 

 

//

 

 

 

---Thursday, June 14th, 2:30pm---

 

The REAL Disaster of the Ultimate Academy

 

 

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: AND FINALLY, MY GIRLFRIEND

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: I STILL HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA HOW WE BECAME A THING BUT I LOVE YOU WITH ALL MY HEART

 

horny! at the church: <<<33333!!!!

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: i

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: im sorry

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: but with miu’s sexual-ness and angie’s sexual-ness and her being the ultimate artist

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: all I can think of is that one episode of b99

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: where they go to this guy’s art gallery and he explains that all his works of art were made by covering himself and his girlfriend in paint and having sex on the canvas for 24 hours straight

 

build god, then we’ll fuck:

 

horny! at the church:

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: @horny! at the church weekend plans??

 

horny! at the church: angie doesn’t leave until Monday, so I am free! :D

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: be sure to show it to us

 

dick gumshu is online

 

dick gumshu: PLEASE DO NOT

 

dick gumshu: I DON’T THINK HAVING SEX WHILE COVERED IN PAINT IS SAFE

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: FUCK OFF SUCKICHI

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: IF YOU AND COCKITCHY CAN BE AS LOUD AS YOU WANT THEN LET US DO THIS ATLEAST

 

dick gumshu: WHATSHSHSAHJJKAKALAKLLA

 

dick gumshu went offline

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: you broke him??

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: COUGH COUGH ANYWAYS

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: mom your turn!

 

bohemian rhapsody, line 16: very well.

 

 

 

//

 

 

 

---Thursday, June 14th, 2:33pm---

 

Conversation between blue paladin and green paladin

 

 

 

green paladin: we still up for Friday??

 

blue paladin: hell yeagh!!! >:D

 

green paladin: good, good.

 

blue paladin: but where are you??

 

blue paladin: you haven’t come back online??

 

green paladin: oh

 

green paladin: its nothing

 

green paladin went offline

 

 

 

//

 

 

 

---Thursday, June 14th, 2:23pm---

 

The REAL Disaster of the Ultimate Academy

 

 

 

bohemian rhapsody, line 16: I’ll finish, with of course, my lovely girlfriend.

 

bohemian rhapsody, line 16: you made this the greatest months of my life

 

bohemian rhapsody, line 16: and I hope to have many more with you

 

bohemian rhapsody, line 16: I love you <3

 

i thought you were american: BABYYYYYYYY

 

i thought you were american: brb fucking CRYIGN bcuz my girlfriend is PERFECT

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: how cute

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: but you forgot to tell us what you’re doing this summer!!

 

bohemian rhapsody, line 16: ah.

 

bohemian rhapsody, line 16: well

 

bohemian rhapsody, line 16: I’m sorry

 

bohemian rhapsody, line 16 went offline

 

i thought you were american: OH NO

 

i thought you were american went offline

 

 

 

//

 

 

 

---Thursday, June 14th, 2:35pm---

 

Conversation between pianos and maid

 

 

 

pianos: are you ok??

 

maid: ah, forgive me.

 

maid: I did not want to say this to everyone

 

maid: but I have no place to stay.

 

pianos: WHAT

 

maid: This is my first summer without doing maid work.

 

maid: Usually, I would stay at the place I am serving.

 

pianos: and your parents?

 

maid: …

 

pianos: ACK im so so sorry that was really insensitive

 

maid: no no, its quite alright.

 

maid: I just

 

maid: have never told anyone this.

 

maid: my father, Kage Tojo, was… violent.

 

maid: when he and my mother divorced, he took his anger out on me.

 

pianos: WHAT!!

 

maid: Last time he saw me…

 

pianos: oh no

 

pianos: don’t tell me that scar I saw was

 

maid: I’m afraid so.

 

maid: I refuse to talk or visit him now.

 

maid: he is also homophobic.

 

maid: if he found out about us…

 

maid: I’m sure he would find his way to you.

 

maid: and I cannot let that happen.

 

pianos: love I never knew

 

pianos: im so sorry holy shit

 

maid: not your fault.

 

maid: I would stay with my mother, but she lives very far away.

 

pianos: then stay with me! :D

 

maid: hm?

 

pianos: my parents are gone for a whole month starting from Saturday and ill be alone after that!!

 

pianos: you can stay at my place!!

 

pianos: and my parents have been super supportive of me ever since I came out!!

 

pianos: but they haven’t met you yet!

 

pianos: they don’t even know I have a girlfriend

 

pianos: they’ll be thrilled to meet you!

 

maid: that is so sweet of you.

 

maid: ill gladly stay over with you, love.

 

pianos: !!!!!!

 

pianos: awesome, this’ll be great!!!

 

maid: kaede, thank you so much.

 

maid: <3

 

pianos: :D

 

pianos: <333

 

 

 

//

 

 

 

---Thursday, June 14th, 2:23pm---

 

The Gay Trio

 

 

 

lesbeen is online

 

lesbeen: remind me to fucking m u r d e r kage tojo

 

lesbeen went offline

 

bisexwhale: ???????

 

gaytm: cryptid

 

 

 

//

 

 

 

---Thursday, June 14th, 2:23pm---

 

The REAL Disaster of the Ultimate Academy

 

 

 

i thought you were american: good news everybody!!

 

i thought you were american: can I say it??

 

bohemian rhapsody, line 16: go ahead.

 

i thought you were american: kirumi’s staying at my place for the summer!!!!

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: !!!!!!

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: NICE!!!!!

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: yall gonna let us drop by from time to time??

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: I have played Mario cart against everyone EXCEPT for kirumi

 

i thought you were american: yeah yeah ofc!!

 

i thought you were american: bring shu with you

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: yepyep >:3

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: ALRIGHT NOWW

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: tenko your turn!

 

tiddy sof and warm: OK SO

 

tiddy sof and warm: I’m gonna be doing more training this summer!! >:D

 

tiddy sof and warm: just wanna say, I love my girlfriend more than anyone else,

 

magic! magic! uwu: nyehhhh <33333

 

tiddy sof and warm: HNNNGGGG <33333

 

 

 

//

 

 

 

---Thursday, June 14th, 2:38pm---

 

Conversation between fuckin weed and anime

 

 

 

fuckin weed: PLEASE TSU

 

fuckin weed: COME BACK TO THE CHAT

 

fuckin weed: ???PLEAS

 

anime: …fine

 

fuckin weed: YESS

 

 

 

//

 

 

 

---Thursday, June 14th, 2:39pm---

 

The REAL Disaster of the Ultimate Academy

 

 

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: hey guys

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: tsu’s coming back to the chat

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: DON’T bring up the thing she said before leaving k??

 

i thought you were american: you got it!!

 

girl hot. watch naruto is online

 

girl hot. watch naruto: hey heteros

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: >:OOOOO

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: FUCK YOU JUST CALL US???

 

girl hot. watch naruto: shrug emoji

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: JUST CAUSE OF THAT

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: ITS UR TURN MUGI

 

girl hot. watch naruto: yall are still doing this???

 

girl hot. watch naruto: ugh fine

 

girl hot. watch naruto: im doing nothing this summer, just hanging out

 

girl hot. watch naruto: gonna go to a convention also

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: nice!!

 

girl hot. watch naruto: ok soooooo

 

girl hot. watch naruto: rantaro buddy

 

girl hot. watch naruto: thanks for being the greatest best friend ever

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: YYEAAHH BOY

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: though its funny cause in my dreams you literally kill me

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: and frame it on kaede

 

i thought you were american: ???WH

grape panta on my tiny balls: rantaro they’re not called dreams when they happen during weed induced comas

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: that’s called hallucination

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: FOR FUCK SAKEEE I DON’T DRINK WEED!

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: drink weed

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: drink weed

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: drink weed

 

sad little man: drink weed

 

i thought you were american: drink weed

 

magic! magic! uwu: drink weed

 

tiddy sof and warm: drink weed

 

horny! at the church: drink weed

 

build god, then we’ll fuck: drink weed

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: hnbnhbn bullygni stppop

 

girl hot. watch naruto: ANYWAYSSSSSSSSSS

 

girl hot. watch naruto: im gonna continue

 

 

 

//

 

 

 

---Thursday, June 14th, 2:54pm---

 

The REAL Disaster of the Ultimate Academy

 

 

 

girl hot. watch naruto: lastly there’s maki

 

girl hot. watch naruto: uhhh

 

girl hot. watch naruto: I really admire you

 

girl hot. watch naruto: you’re really tough and awesome

 

girl hot. watch naruto: :))

 

sassa ass ass sassy enee enee: thanks

 

 

 

//

 

 

 

---Thursday, June 14th, 2:54pm---

 

Conversation between fuckin weed and anime

 

 

 

fuckin weed: smooth

 

anime: FUCK OFFSJSAKJHSALKJHSSJHUJAKHSSK

 

 

 

//

 

 

 

---Thursday, June 14th, 2:55pm---

 

The REAL Disaster of the Ultimate Academy

 

 

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: alrighttt

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: ryoma, you go now

 

sad little man: aight

 

 

 

//

 

 

 

---Thursday, June 14th, 3:01pm---

 

The REAL Disaster of the Ultimate Academy

 

 

 

nerf bastion 2k18: and I’m excited to spend our next year together, as a couple!! :D

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: AWWWWWWW KEEBS

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: ILY

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: that’s a wrap!!

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: NOW

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: EVERYBODY IN THE LIVING ROOM. RN.

 

dick gumshu: ???

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: MOVIE NIGHTTTT

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: !!!!!!

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: HELL YEAAAHH

 

bohemian rhapsody, line 16: allow me to help set up.

 

i thought you were american: OH ILL HELP OUT TOO!!!

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: 5 MIN. EVERYBODY. NO EXCEPTIONS

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: ALRIGHT

 

 

 

//

 

 

 

---Friday, June 15th, 1:11pm---

 

The REAL Disaster of the Ultimate Academy

 

 

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: well

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: this is it

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: uh

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: gonna miss you guys

 

beeschurger: gonta as well :(

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: same

 

dick gumshu: well see each other in two months, at least

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: yeah

 

i thought you were american: me and kirumi have left already

 

homme d’herbe d’avocat: gotta catch the plane at like 6am tomorrow so im out

 

beeschurger: gonta’s driver is already driving gonta out to forest!

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: me n shu are about to leave

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: he’s gonna introduce me to his uncle! :DD

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: we’ll walk with you!

 

nonthreatening feminist boy: I live close by!! >:D

 

dick gumshu: cool!!

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: so. everyone…

 

grape panta on my tiny balls: see you in two months :)

Chapter Text

---Monday, July 30th, 7:39am---

 

Goodbye my Fucking Sanity

 

 

this is how we do things in my country: hello everyone! :DDD

 

this is how we do things in my country: how is your summer going?

 

Hamster Dance: Screamo Edition sent an image

 

Hamster Dance: Screamo Edition: I am currently surrounded by the winged creatures of hell.

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench is online

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: gundham why the F U C K are you covered in birds

 

lemme kill myselfie: what a life

 

lemme kill myselfie: im in Canada rn

 

lemme kill myselfie: and let me ask this

 

lemme kill myselfie: how big do you think moose are??

 

choke on my ahoge: the size of a horse, obv

 

lemme kill myselfie: think again

 

lemme kill myselfie sent an image

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: WHAT THE FUCCKKKKK

 

choke on my ahoge: ????????????????????????

 

minion goblin: YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: ?????ITS ENORMOUS????????

 

Hamster Dance: Screamo Edition: THE HORNED BEASTS OF THE UNDERWORLD!!!!

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: SCARY!!!!!!!!!!!

 

does it LOOK like akane even WASHes her fucking hair: UHHH

 

eat shit and die: WHAT THE HELL

 

lemme kill myselfie: :)

 

lemme kill myselfie: big dogs

 

choke on my ahoge:N,OO

 

lemme kill myselfie: anyways

 

lemme kill myselfie: how’s ur summer going?

 

choke on my ahoge: ARE WE JUST GONNA MOVE ON??

 

lemme kill myselfie: yes

 

choke on my ahoge: k

 

choke on my ahoge: im staying with my cousin nearby

 

choke on my ahoge: oh he’s looking at my phone

 

choke on my ahoge: “your friends are boring”- direct quote from him

 

minion goblin: that’s rude!!! ill fight him!!! >:(

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: mmmmm I wouldn’t do that

 

choke on my ahoge: he’s 6 foot, black hair, red eyes

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: he’s terrifying

 

minion goblin: peko and maki have red eyes too :II

 

choke on my ahoge: hmmmmm

 

choke on my ahoge: true true

 

choke on my ahoge: both of them are skilled in combat so it might work

 

choke on my ahoge: ill ask him

 

 

 

//

 

 

 

---Monday, July 30th, 7:39am---

 

Goodbye my Fucking Sanity

 

 

 

choke on my ahoge: he said no

 

 

 

//

 

 

 

 

---Monday, July 30th, 4:56pm---

 

Goodbye my Fucking Sanity

 

 

 

does it LOOK like akane even WASHes her fucking hair: just bought 20 packs of delicious mcdonalds mcnuggies!

 

does it LOOK like akane even WASHes her fucking hair: I will now proceed to eat them all in one go

 

eat shit and die: AKANE NO

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: AKANE YES

 

does it LOOK like akane even WASHes her fucking hair: mmm yummy

 

eat shit and die: AKANE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

does it LOOK like akane even WASHes her fucking hair: MMMMMMM

 

eat shit and die: AKANe,,,.,.,.,.,. YOUR McNUGGIES,.,,,,.,,.,,

 

boss baby kin’s edgy devianart oc is online

 

boss baby kin’s edgy devianart oc: FUCK you guys

 

boss baby kin’s edgy devianart oc: kaz was laughing so hard he woke me up from my fuCKING NAP

 

choke on my ahoge: oh you’re together rn?

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: he’s at my place

 

sausage italiano  is online

 

boss baby kin’s edgy devianart oc: teruteru you’re in fucking Italy but I can STILL sense you about to type some sort of sex joke

 

boss baby kin’s edgy devianart oc: don’t

 

boss baby kin’s edgy devianart oc: do you want to keep your bones?

 

sausage italiano: i

 

sausage italiano: uh

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: SILENCED

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo  is online

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: guys I really need some comforting words rn….

 

this is how we do things in my country: chiaki! is everything ok?? D:

 

choke on my ahoge: aww did you loose at fortnite??

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: fucka you basard

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: and no I lost at overwatch

 

choke on my ahoge: ah

 

this is how we do things in my country: oh! that is the game you showed me before, yes?

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: yeah

 

this is how we do things in my country: I like that game! My favourite character is Reaper! :D

 

choke on my ahoge: of course

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: my DUMB TEAM wouldn’t stay on the PAYLOAD

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: AND OUR HEALER WAS AN ANA!!!!

 

lemme kill myselfie: who were you playing, chiaki??

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: genji

 

lemme kill myselfie: blocked

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: :(((((

 

choke on my ahoge: you deserve it

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: BULLYING

 

lemme kill myselfie: @everyone what are your overwatch mains??

 

lemme kill myselfie: im assuming everyone has played at least once??

 

choke on my ahoge: soldier’s pretty neat

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: torb!

 

boss baby kin’s edgy devianart oc: of fucking course

 

boss baby kin’s edgy devianart oc: I like hanzo

 

stab me daddy: widowmaker

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: valid

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: valid

 

does it LOOK like akane even WASHes her fucking hair: valid

 

stab me daddy: :)

 

sausage italiano: I also like widowmaker >:)

 

lemme kill myselfie: unvalid

 

sausage italiano: :(

 

literally crying: I like Mercy! :D

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: THAT’S SO CUTE I MIGHT DIE

 

does it LOOK like akane even WASHes her fucking hair: pharah’s my fav!!

 

eat shit and die: RHEINDHART!

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: you sound like him

 

eat shit and die: I DO! :D

 

minion goblin: d.va

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: I’m shocked.

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: SJHAJHSGHAJHGHJHSAJKHAJHAJ

 

minion goblin: FUCKYOU

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: IBUKI LOVES LUCIO!!! >:D

 

lemme kill myselfie: tracer’s pretty neat,,,,,

 

electric boogaloo: Roadhog, as I’m sure you expected.

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: oh nice!! :DD

 

Hamster Dance: Screamo Edition: I could never stoop so low as to play a mere mortal game.

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: Hammond

 

lemme kill myselfie: Hammond

 

choke on my ahoge: Hammond

 

boss baby kin’s edgy devianart oc: Hammond

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: Hammond

 

does it LOOK like akane even WASHes her fucking hair: Hammond

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: Hammond

 

minion goblin: Hammond

 

electric boogaloo: Hammond

 

stab me daddy: Hammond

 

eat shit and die: Hammond

 

Hamster Dance: Screamo Edition: ….

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: yeah he mains Hammond

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: HE HASN’T EVEN BEEN OUT IN QUICK PLAY FOR A WEEK DUDE!

 

choke on my ahoge: gundham

 

choke on my ahoge: you’re valid. I love you

 

Hamster Dance: Screamo Edition: !!!!!

 

 

 

//

 

 

 

 

---Monday, July 30th, 9:09pm---

 

Goodbye my Fucking Sanity

 

 

hopesexual trash bag: my main is junkrat! :D

 

minion goblin: no one cares

 

hopesexual trash bag: understandable, my bad

 

 

 

//

 

 

 

---Tuesday, July 31st, 4:42am---

 

Goodbye my Fucking Sanity

 

 

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: do you ever just wake up

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: and like

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: feel an intense infatuation for your s/o

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: no

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: because I feel that every day, at all times!!

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: get on my level!!!

 

boss baby kin’s edgy devianart oc: YYOU CANT JUST SSAY THATYOU FUCKING IDITIOT

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: god

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: @this is how we do things in my countryI love you so much I wanna marry you

 

this is how we do things in my country: !!!!!!!!!!

 

this is how we do things in my country: <33333!!!!!!!

 

choke on my ahoge: chiaki

 

choke on my ahoge: wouldn’t that also make you a princess??

 

this is how we do things in my country: it’s what she deserves.

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: AHGAHJAHGHQYJQHGHJQHJHQGH

 

this is how we do things in my country: one day we will rule novoselic together!!

 

lemme kill myselfie: id move to novoselic in a heartbeat

 

lemme kill myselfie: two strong lesbians, ruling a kingdom? iconique

 

choke on my ahoge: chiaki finally becomes princess peach and lives out her bowser yaoi fantasy

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU BROUGHT THAT UP AGAIN FUCK OFFFFFFF

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: does that make Sonia, Mario?

 

lemme kill myselfie: no

 

lemme kill myselfie: Sonia is daisy, because everybody knows both peach and daisy are lesbians and in a loving relationship

 

minion goblin: oh absolutely

 

choke on my ahoge: yep

 

lemme kill myselfie: bowser and Mario are boyfriends

 

lemme kill myselfie: which makes fuyuhiko Mario and kazuichi bowser

 

boss baby kin’s edgy devianart oc: turn on your location I just wanna fucking talk

 

lemme kill myselfie: im in Canada rn photographing Niagara Falls so good luck

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: you just gave him your location

 

lemme kill myselfie: ah

 

lemme kill myselfie: fuck

 

choke on my ahoge: this is so sad

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: but wouldn’t that make kazuichi the top, if he’s bowser?

 

hopesexual trash bag: um??? bowser’s a bottom???

 

boss baby kin’s edgy devianart oc: E  N  O  U  G  H

 

 

 

//

 

 

 

 

---Tuesday, July 31st, 5:12am---

 

Goodbye my Fucking Sanity

 

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: I just thought of something

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: if fuyuhiko’s gonna be the head of the kuzuryu clan one day

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: wouldn’t that also make kazuichi the head???

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench:

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: i

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: oh no

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: OH NO

 

hopesexual trash bag: a gay ruled yakuza gang?

 

hopesexual trash bag: sounds fun! where do I sign up

 

does it LOOK like akane even WASHes her fucking hair: guess you’ll just have to break up before then

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: DD:>

 

boss baby kin’s edgy devianart oc: >:(((((((

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: BABY NO I CANTTTT

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: I CRIED WATCHING FUCKING TOY STORY 3 IM NOT FIT FOR THISS

 

boss baby kin’s edgy devianart oc: EVERYBODY CRIES WATCHING TOY STORY 3 BITCH YOULL BE FINE

 

hopesexual trash bag: nothing more romantic than leading the most dangerous crime syndicate in japan with your partner 

 

 

 

//

 

 

 

---Tuesday, July 31st, 7:03am---

 

Goodbye my Fucking Sanity

 

 

choke on my ahoge: g,uys I dr,,opped,,,,..,, m,y  f uc k I ng  eggos on th fl,,oor

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: aw

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: let me play you a sad despacito on the world’s tiniest alexa

 

boss baby kin’s edgy devianart oc: that’s not NEARLY as sad as the recent news

 

boss baby kin’s edgy devianart oc: haven’t yall heard?????

 

electric boogaloo: ???????

 

boss baby kin’s edgy devianart oc: there’s a new disease called ligma

 

electric boogaloo: what is ligma?

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: ladies and gentlemen,,,,, we got him

 

boss baby kin’s edgy devianart oc: ligma balls

 

electric boogaloo: i

 

lemme kill myselfie: that is so funny can we get 500 like

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: bottom text

 

electric boogaloo: blocked blocked blocked

 

boss baby kin’s edgy devianart oc: unblock me plz I gotta say something

 

electric boogaloo: unblocked.

 

boss baby kin’s edgy devianart oc: bitch

 

boss baby kin’s edgy devianart oc  went offline

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: WE’LL BE RIGHT BACK

 

choke on my ahoge: guys my fucking E  G  G O  S

 

 

 

//

 

 

 

---Tuesday, July 31st, 1:02pm---

 

Conversation between  I'm his  and he’s mine

 

 

i’m his: hajimeee im so BORED

 

i’m his: pls come over :((((

 

he’s mine: k im omw

 

he’s mine: :DDDDD

 

 

 

//

 

 

 

---Tuesday, July 31st, 1:34pm---

 

Goodbye my Fucking Sanity

 

 

choke on my ahoge  sent an image

 

choke on my ahoge: NAGITO WTF

 

choke on my ahoge: NOBODY NEEDS THIS MUCHFUCKING ORANGE JUICE

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: KSAHJAJASHJAHKJHAJAHJAKJHJHAJ

 

hopesexual trash bag: I bought it for you! :D

 

choke on my ahoge: THAT WAS ONE TIME!!!!!

 

 

 

 

 

//

 

 

 

 

---Tuesday, July 31st, 3:33pm---

 

Conversation between orage yuice and gaemer grill

 

 

gaemer grill: hey gays how’s ur date going

 

 

 

 

//

 

 

 

---Tuesday, July 31st, 4:21pm---

 

Conversation between orage yuice and gaemer grill

 

 

gaemer grill: hello??

 

 

 

 

//

 

 

 

---Tuesday, July 31st, 4:23pm---

 

Goodbye my Fucking Sanity

 

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: hey I texted haj on how his dates goin but he didn’t respond

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: its been almost an hour

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: thoughts?

 

boss baby kin’s edgy devianart oc: they fuckin

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: mhm

 

lemme kill myselfie: for an hour????

 

does it LOOK like akane even WASHes her fucking hair: 10 bucks nagito bottoms

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: nah

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: hajime bottoms 100%

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: FAKE friend hajime tops

 

sausage italiano: you’re being really creepy yk

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: :I

 

does it LOOK like akane even WASHes her fucking hair: :I

 

eat shit and die: :I

 

hey wanna touch my socket wrench: :I

 

boss baby kin’s edgy devianart oc: :I

 

lemme kill myselfie: :I

 

electric boogaloo: :I

 

sausage italiano: i

 

sausage italiano went offline

 

lemme kill myselfie: damn

 

minion goblin: gone

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: he still hasn’t responded

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: gimme a sec

 

 

 

//

 

 

 

---Tuesday, July 31st, 4:26pm---

 

Conversation between bambi for the ps2 and the secret white m&m

 

 

 

bambi for the ps2: hello??????

 

 

 

//

 

 

 

---Tuesday, July 31st, 4:45pm---

 

Conversation between bambi for the ps2 and the secret white m&m

 

 

 

bambi for the ps2: HEY

 

 

 

//

 

 

 

---Tuesday, July 31st, 4:50pm---

 

Conversation between bambi for the ps2 and the secret white m&m

 

 

 

bambi for the ps2: who tops?

 

 

 

//

 

 

 

---Tuesday, July 31st, 4:51pm---

 

Goodbye my Fucking Sanity

 

 

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: nagito isn’t responding either

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH: soospeecious!!

 

minion goblin: confirmed

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: any more game theories up in here?

 

Hamster Dance: Screamo Edition: they’ve ascended to the 2nddimension

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: cool

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: anybody else

 

this is how we do things in my country: they were brutally murdered!! :D

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: maybe

 

boss baby kin’s edgy devianart oc: nonono they’re FUCKING

 

what if kirby ate the hat, nintendo: that’s the most likely answer

 

electric boogaloo: I don’t see why you’re all so obsessed with this.

 

boss baby kin’s edgy devianart oc: this is the greatest sugondese mystery

 

electric boogaloo: what?? is sugondese????

 

boss baby kin’s edgy devianart oc: sugondese nuts

 

boss baby kin’s edgy devianart oc went offline

 

electric boogaloo: h

 

lemme kill myselfie: im begging you to STOP

 

boss baby kin’s edgy devianart oc is online

 

boss baby kin’s edgy devianart oc: no

 

boss baby kin’s edgy devianart oc went offline

 

 

 

//

 

 

 

---Tuesday, July 31st, 4:21pm---

 

Conversation between orage yuice and gaemer grill

 

 

 

orage yuice: AHhhhhh sorry sorry!!

 

orage yuice: me and nagito walked to get smoothies

 

orage yuice: whys the group chat going crazy rn??

 

 

 

//

 

 

 

---Tuesday, July 31st, 4:26pm---

 

Conversation between bambi for the ps2 and the secret white m&m

 

 

the secret white m&m: hajime does :)

 

 

 

//

 

 

 

---Tuesday, July 31st, 5:13pm---

 

Goodbye my Fucking Sanity

 

 

 

choke on my ahogeI F U C KI NG  H A TE Y OU A L L

 

 

 

//

 

 

 

---Tuesday, July 31st, 5:17pm---

 

Conversation between mcnuggies and mcflurries

 

 

 

mcflurries: hey so

 

mcflurries: I owe you ten bucks

 

 

 

//

 

 

 

---Tuesday, July 31st, 4:51pm---

 

Goodbye my Fucking Sanity

 

 

 

boss baby kin’s edgy devianart oc: looks like the eta dilemma is resolved

 

electric boogaloo: fool me once,

 

electric boogaloo: shame on you.

 

electric boogaloo: fool we twice,

 

electric boogaloo: shame on you.

 

electric boogaloo: fool me thrice,

 

electric boogaloo: you’re full sawcon.

 

boss baby kin’s edgy devianart oc: the fuck is sawcon??

 

electric boogaloo: sawcon my dick

 

electric boogaloo  went offline

 

boss baby kin’s edgy devianart oc: F U C K

 

 

 

//

 

 

 

---Tuesday, July 31st, 4:51pm---

 

Goodbye my Fucking Sanity

 

 

 

what if kirby ate the hate, nintendo changed hopesexual trashbags name to hajime tops

Chapter Text

grape panta on my tiny balls changed 15 names

 

grape panta on my tiny balls changed their name to underpanta

 

underpanta: mothers and fuckers of the jury

 

pian-oh no: great

 

pian-oh no: cool and good

 

underpanta: listen nyall it’s a new year

 

underpanta: and that means. new names

 

chaotic het energy: okay but

 

chaotic het energy: psa announcement: underpanta is a garbage name

 

underpanta: okay, first of all,

 

underpanta: rude

 

underpanta: second,

 

underpanta: the a in psa already stands for announcement

 

underpanta: public service announcement announcement

 

chaotic het energy: fuck

 

underpanta: oh you know what

 

underpanta changed chaotic het energy’s name to chaotic dipshit energy

 

chaotic dipshit energy: BITCH

 

chaotic dipshit energy: biphobia is still alive and real… tragic :’(

 

god damn it akechi is online

 

god damn it akechi: @everyone LISTEN UP THOTS

 

chia pet is online

 

chia pet: I was. in. the fucking. SHOWER

 

god damn it akechi: why did you GET OUT????

 

chia pet: BECAUSE I GOT PINGED!!

 

sex of sex: HOW DID YOU HEAR THE PING FROM THE SHOWER????

 

chia pet: I HAD MY PHONE WITH ME DUH

 

sleepy weepy: y

 

sleepy weepy: YOU BRING YOUR PHONE INTO THE SHOWER?????

 

everybody knows im a lesbian: THE???? FUCK????

 

sex of sex: oh rantaro honey you gay disaster

 

god damn it akechi: ANYWAYS

 

god damn it akechi: PSA ANNOUNCEMENT

 

underpanta: you have got to be fucking kidding me

 

god damn it akechi: JUST WANTED TO LET NYOU KNOW THAT I NOW HAVE A BOYFRIEND AND GIRLFRIEND

 

god damn it akechi: THAT IS ALL

 

chia pet: HOLY FUUUUUUUUUCK

 

pian-oh no: HELL FUCKIN YEAH GET THAT BREAD

 

taped to ryomas wall: I am going to assume you mean…?

 

god damn it akechi: @assassin’s teeth@chaotic dipshit energyma loves

 

god damn it akechi: more maki but yknow ejeehheeh

 

panic! at the everywhere: the bi energy is strong here

 

chaotic dipshit energy: <333!!!!!!

 

assassin’s teeth: …<3

 

god damn it akechi: you can read about our journey of love in “Three Petals”, new fic coming soon to ao3!

 

pian-oh no:

 

everybody knows im a lesbian: i

 

underpanta: wouldn’t be tsumugi if she didn’t say some weird fucking shit once in a while

 

underpanta: ANYWHOOOO

 

underpanta: gays!! its Halloween!

 

underpanta: whatre yall dressing up as

 

pian-oh no: sexy piano

 

chaotic dipshit energy: the letter b

 

chia pet: bread

 

assassin’s teeth: my slowly deteriorating sanity

 

god damn it akechi: Minecraft

 

bennis: t

 

panic! at the everywhere: Minecraft also

 

sex of sex: snas underta

 

god: satan!!!!

 

underpanta: I missed you guys

 

bennis: oh hey ive got a psa announcement also

 

underpanta: never mind fuck you guys

 

bennis: soon it will have been 1 year since I started dating gonta so

 

bennis: jot that down

 

pian-oh no: holy fuckign shit

 

pian-oh no: MOMENTOUS OCCASION

 

fyreflyes: excited!!!!

 

god: this occasion is special!

 

god: let us release a colony of termites into the dorms to celebrate!!!!

 

pian-oh no: lets. not

 

underpanta: OH SHIT YOU GUYS HALLOWEEN PARTY

 

underpanta: WHOSE GOIIIING

 

assassin’s teeth: literally everyone since the first hour is mandatory attendance

 

underpanta: ok fair

 

chia pet: hey kokishu you guys gonna make out again

 

underpanta: fuck right off ranty go stick a metal pipe up your coooooooterrrrrr

 

sex of sex: he already does

 

sex of sex: hes in a relationship with keebs after all

 

underpanta: HOLY FUCKING SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT

 

panic! at the everywhere: MIU

 

chaotic dipshit energy: I think im gonna cry

 

god damn it akechi: INDECEENT

 

chia pet: JESUS FUCKING CHRIST MIU

 

you, robot: I DO NO SUCH THING! I WOULD NEVER HURT RANTARO! I CAN NOT BELIEVE YOU WOULD INSINUATE THAT MIU!

 

you, robot went offline

 

sex of sex: oh shit

 

sex of sex: did i… actually upset him

 

underpanta: no hes fine

 

panic! at the everywhere: are. you sure

 

underpanta: he cant cry

 

underpanta: hes a robot

 

chia pet: you’ll be the one crying if you keep insulting my boyfriend

 

underpanta: haha lmao

 

chia pet went offline

 

underpanta: w

 

underpanta: wait shit

 

sex of sex: dead

 

god damn it akechi: kick his ass

 

underpanta: I guess im uwu pewished

 

underpanta: lmao everybody press f in the cha

 

underpanta went offline

 

panic! at the everywhere: WHAT WAS THAT NOISE

 

everybody knows im a lesbian: what just

 

sex of sex: HOLY FUUUU

 

sex of sex: RANTARO JUST KICKED DOWN KOKICHIS DOOR

 

sex of sex: OFF ITS HINGES

 

sleepy weepy: SJHJJHSHJSHSK

 

chaotic dipshit energy: OH S

 

pian-oh no: RANTAR O

 

mum is online

 

mum: hello all

 

mum: I would just like to say, if you need any help with costumes, I am ready to assist.

 

sex of sex: MOM HOLY FU CK

 

god damn it akechi: RANTARO IS GONNA KILL KOKICHI

 

chaotic dipshit energy: HE KICKED DOWN HIS DOOOOOOOR

 

mum:

 

mum: ah.

 

mum: I see you all managed to pick your own Halloween costumes.

 

mum: you all seem to be going as clowns.

 

pian-oh no: that’s my fucking girlfriend!!!!

 

underpanta is online

 

underpanta: m om help m

 

underpanta went offline

 

god: and kokichi died that day

 

god: this has been a psa announcement

 

Chapter Text

--Sunday, December 16th, 1:09pm--

--Hellish Havoc Group Chat--

 

 

junkrat: hey

 

junkrat: hey

 

junkrat: hEy

 

smashmouth: what the hell u want

 

junkrat: okokok so

 

junkrat: I went to ikea with hiro and muku

 

junkrat: but I cant fucking find him

 

rockruff: WH

 

k a w a i i: since when is there an ikea here??????

 

mondos bizarre adventure: HOW do you lose a WHOLE ASS PERSON??

 

pidge: also why are you at ikea with hiro

 

junkrat: cuz hes the only one who volunteered to come with me and muku

 

junkrat: yall are fake friens

 

alpha and omega’s three million sequels: I would have gone if I knew you were going to ikea!!! that place rules

 

Marie Antoinette: I met god in an ikea once

 

Marie Antoinette: shes chill

 

k a w a i i: hey while ur there can u try their meatballs??? I wanna know if the legends are true

 

smashmouth: IKEA??? HAS FOOD???????

 

junkrat: guys ur supposed to be helping ME FIND HIRO

 

alpha and omega’s three million sequels: HOW TF WE SUPPOSED TO HELP YOU

 

mondos bizarre adventure: AGAIN,, HOW ON FUCK DID YOU /LOSE/ HIRO

 

mondos bizarre adventure: HES LIKE 7FT TALL

 

junkrat: one second he was behind me, then he WASN’T

 

junkrat: ITS NOT MY FAULT

 

fucktherulez: when you lose someone at a store, it is best to go to the front desk and ask to make an announcement!

 

junkrat: ohohoooho smart! thank you taka ur the only bitch I respect in this house

 

mondos bizarre adventure: don’t call him a bitch. bitch

 

junkrat: bitch

 

mondos bizarre adventure: bitch

 

junkrat: bitch

 

pidge: battle of the bitches

 

mukky: so. taka

 

mukky: that turned out to be bad advice

 

mukky: she just leaned into the intercom and said “you’re in gods hands now, hiro”

 

pidge: KJSJSJKSJKJKSJSJSJK

 

rockruff: oh…. no

 

junkrat: aaaaaand

 

junkrat: we found him

 

junkrat: I heard a scream from across the store

 

mondos bizarre adventure: unbelievable

 

 

//

 

 

--Sunday, December 16th, 1:56pm--

--Hellish Havoc Group Chat--

 

junkrat: I am. a fool

 

smashmouth: this isn’t news but what happened

 

junkrat: fuck u

 

junkrat: im lost

 

rockruff: WHAT

 

Marie Antoinette: god fucking damn it junko

 

Marie Antoinette: WHERE’S MUKURO

 

mukky: I literally have no fucking clue where I am

 

mukky: one second im standing next to junko

 

mukky: and then the next there are. baths everywhere

 

junkrat: everywhere I look,,, fucking PILLOWS

 

junkrat: and not a single person in sight

 

junkrat: lmfao im really about to die in this ikea yall

 

fucktherulez: the best thing to do when you are lost is stand completely still and let people find you!

 

junkrat: hmm

 

mukky: your advice didn’t go over so well last time

 

junkrat: aight lets try it then

 

mukky: where are the fucking employees

 

mukky: did they just evaporate

 

junkrat: oh I can hear something!!

 

junkrat: hmm… getting louder….

 

junkrat: footsteps?? sounds like running??

 

junkrat: oh wait

 

junkrat: OH FUCK OH SH

 

junkrat: WSJWKJKJKJK

 

junkrat  went offline

 

pidge: okay I think junko like. actually died

 

rockruff: GUYS OH NO

 

my suspicions are confirmed: I am… concerned

 

pidge: presse effe inne ethe chatte

 

mukky: what the hell

 

mukky: oh I found someone!!!

 

k a w a i i: don’t die like junko did!!

 

mukky:

 

mukky: w

 

mukky: its mr kizakura

 

mukky:

 

mukky: drinking whiskey straight from the bottle

 

pidge: that’s a rare pokemon, you gotta befriend it

 

pidge: throw a berry at it

 

Marie Antoinette: that’s god

 

Marie Antoinette: show respect

 

smashmouth: kyoko why is your dad getting drunk in an ikea

 

my suspicions are confirmed: hes not my dad and honestly? no clue

 

mondos bizarre adventure: what the fuck is going on

 

mondos bizarre adventure: hiro is lost in an ikea, mukuro met god and junko fucking died

 

im hella high my guy is online

 

im hella high my guy: hi guys. its me

 

smashmouth: hey hiro!!! is junko like. okay

 

im hella high my guy: ya I just really scared her

 

im hella high my guy: shes still laying on the floor

 

im hella high my guy: but hey! good news

 

im hella high my guy: im an employee of ikea now

 

mondos bizarre adventure: ?????????

 

rockruff: HOW??

 

im hella high my guy: I just got approached by an employee and all of a sudden. I work here

 

Marie Antoinette: Christ

 

Marie Antoinette: ill beat you up later for killing junko

 

junkrat: im fine im fine dw

 

junkrat: dawwww you were worried about me <33333

 

Marie Antoinette: die <333333

 

junkrat: okay im getting out of this ikea

 

junkrat: I cant even remember what I came here for anyways

 

my suspicions are confirmed: you guys were there for like 3 hours

 

junkrat: well shit

 

junkrat: okay lets go

 

junkrat: we just. gotta find

 

junkrat: an

 

junkrat: exit

 

junkrat: fuck

 

//

 

 

--Sunday, December 16th, 3:43pm--

--Hellish Havoc Group Chat--

 

mukky: JUNKO WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU

 

//

 

 

--Sunday, December 16th, 3:57pm--

--Hellish Havoc Group Chat--

 

junkrat: so i. may have left mukuro at the ikea

 

Marie Antoinette: its too late for her.

 

Marie Antoinette: shes in gods hands now

 

mukky: motherfucker

 

Chapter Text

--Wednesday, May 29th, 5:02pm--

---Hellish Havoc Group Chat---

 

 

donut talk to me: WHAT is the uppening yall

 

Marie Antoinette: death

 

mondos bizarre adventure: ooohogohgoo edgy

 

Marie Antoinette: I will steal all your bone marrow and rip out your teeth oowada don’t fucking test me

 

mondos bizarre adventure:

 

donut talk to me: damn

 

my suspicions are confirmed: listen I get you’re gay and missing junko but

 

Marie Antoinette: NO

 

smashmouth: yall right celeste??

 

smashmouth: that time of the month huh?? ;)

 

Marie Antoinette: yes. today is the full moon and I am due to turn into a werewolf any second now

 

Marie Antoinette: and when I do you will be the first to die, kuwata

 

smashmouth: shit

 

junkrat: I want celeste to kill me

 

mukky: junko.

 

junkrat: SHUT UPPPPPPPP

 

smashmouth: so…… whats up you guys???

 

rockruff: toko’s at my place and hanging out with komaru and being extra gay I want out

 

my evil twin: FUCK YOU

 

rockruff: leon,kyoko pls come overrrr

 

mondos bizarre adventure: why leon??

 

rockruff: he’s my boyfriend

 

mondos bizarre adventure: ???????????????????WHAT

 

rockruff: ya

 

rockruff: kyoko’s my wonderful girlfriend and leon’s my wonderful boyfriend

 

rockruff: did we never tell you guys???

 

k a w a i i: no????????

 

smashmouth: yeah we platonic brolationship

 

smashmouth: kissing only strengthens our bromance

 

donut talk to me: lose the b

 

smashmouth: I love him (platonically)

 

futaba: you no homoed so hard I popped a braincell

 

smashmouth: anyways yes im omw

 

my suspicions are confirmed: so am i

 

rockruff: YES

 

donut talk to me: makoto im so confused

 

donut talk to me: you’re dating both kyoko, smartest girl in class and leon, who……. isnt

 

donut talk to me: are you moronsexual?????? or like. smartsexual??????

 

my suspicions are confirmed: both

 

smashmouth: both

 

donut talk to me: fuck yeah get it

 

my evil twin: whatever me n komaru will be going out

 

my evil twin: komaru wanted to go out and make a list of every dog we see

 

mondos bizarre adventure: that is so fucking cute I just might kill someone

 

mondos bizarre adventure: @fucktherulez we gotta do this

 

fucktherulez: I agree! >:D

 

smashmouth: ANYWAYS @mukky @k a w a I i how are you doing gays

 

k a w a i i: good!!!!

 

mukky: she’s got a concert tonight and ive got backstage passes :>

 

mukky: I cant believe I get to meet sayaka maizono aka prettiest most talented singer out there

 

k a w a i i: HGJHFYUJ HNN <33333

 

broccoli tortellini: gross.

 

smashmouth: W H E R E DID YOU COME FROM

 

alpha and omega’s three million sequels: the uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh womb

 

donut talk to me: WHERE DID YOU GO

 

donut talk to me: WHERE DID YOU COME FROM

 

donut talk to me: COTTON EYE JOE

 

smashmouth: two types of people

 

my evil twin: OH MY GSODH DODSMSJHSUEJJEJNEJNJNJENNJ

my evil twin: THERES A BIG DOG ACROSS THE STREET ITS SO BIG OH MY GOD UNIT

 

my evil twin: sorry, komaru was really excited and took my phone

 

smashmouth: mhmmm :I

 

rockruff: how many dogs have you seen so far

 

my evil twin: only 3

 

my evil twin: we saw a cat tho

 

k a w a i i: ????ON A LEASH????

 

my evil twin: ya

 

k a w a i i: damb

 

im hella high my guy: send pussy pic pls

 

k a w a i i: send fucking what

 

k a w a i i: send WHAT????????

 

im hella high my guy: cat pictures????

 

im hella high my guy: what did you think I meant ;)

 

my evil twin: when I see you yasuhiro it is on fucking sight

 

smashmouth: thought you only killed pretty boys?

 

im hella high my guy: ouch

 

im hella high my guy: that hurts

 

my evil twin: for this motherfucker I will make one (1) exception

 

im hella high my guy: are you even tall enough to reach my neck

 

my evil twin: I will decimate your kneecaps

 

donut talk to me: hiro she’s literally a cereal killer

 

futaba: c

 

futaba: cereal??????

 

smashmouth: callout post for genocider syo she stabbed my fucking eggos

 

mondos bizarre adventure: eggos are not cereal you fucking walnut

 

Marie Antoinette: this is just lovely

 

my suspicions are confirmed: I hate all of you

 

my suspicions are confirmed: except for makoto of course

 

rockruff: ^^!!! <333

 

my suspicions are confirmed: I would kill someone if you asked me to

 

cherry pepsi: kyoko You Are A Detective

 

my suspicions are confirmed: don’t worry I’ll put hiro in jail for it

 

im hella high my guy: WHAT

 

smashmouth: and so, balance was restored to the dorm

 

my suspicions are confirmed: and you’re next leon

 

smashmouth: oh

 

Chapter Text

underpanta  is online

 

underpanta: hey

 

underpanta: which one of you motherFUCKERS wet my TOES

 

bennis: its 3am what the fuck are you doing awake

 

underpanta: i can ask you the same thing???

 

underpanta: and my moist foot fingers woke me up

 

bennis: literally never say that ever again

 

bennis: also i cant sleep

 

underpanta: oof :cc

 

underpanta: @everyone

 

underpanta: SPILL

 

underpanta: ME TOES ARE WET

 

everybody knows im a lesbian: ?????????????????????

 

chia pet: bruh wtf r u talking abt

 

sex of sex: did shuhara suck ur toes

 

panic! at the everywhere: N

 

panic! at the everywhere: I DID NOT

 

panic! at the everywhere: kokichi?????????

 

underpanta: woke up. toes were wet

 

underpanta: im conflicted

 

chia pet: pissed urself

 

underpanta: NOOOOOOOOO

 

underpanta: I FUCKING DIDNT

 

assassin’s teeth: lets just get this over with

 

assassin’s teeth added monokuma to the chat

 

underpanta: whatd you do to my toes bitch

 

monokuma: lol what

 

monokuma: nuthin

 

chia pet: *takes out a gun*

 

chia pet: tell us

 

monokuma: *growls*

 

assassin’s teeth: oh jesus christ

 

chia pet: *points gun towards you*

 

chia pet: TELL. US.

 

chia pet: you wouldnt want to see me angry

 

monokuma: *a devilish smirk appears on my face*

 

monokuma: >:3c

 

chia pet: fine. you asked for this

 

chia pet: *shoots you, kills you 1 hit nm*

 

monokuma: *dodges*

 

chia pet: HEY

 

chia pet: I SAID 1 HIT NM YOU CANT DODGE BITCH

 

monokuma: I DO WAT I WANT

 

chaotic dipshit energy: SHUT

 

chaotic dipshit energy: THE FUCK

 

chaotic dipshit energy: UUUP

 

everybody knows im a lesbian: kokichi accept the fact that u pissed urself

 

underpanta: NO

 

underpanta: NO

 

underpanta: NO

 

underpanta: NO

 

underpanta: NO

 

sleepy weepy: haha ur a little piss boy arent you

 

underpanta: I

 

underpanta: AM NOT!!!!!!!

 

god damn it akechi: piss booooooyyyyeee

 

bennis: kokichi i can hear you crying please shut the fuck up

 

underpanta: o nvm guys crisis averted

 

underpanta: theres a leak 

 

underpanta: a hole in th ceiling

 

underpanta: so i am, in fact

 

underpanta: NOT a piss boy!!

 

sex of sex: sounds like something a piss boy would say

 

underpanta: NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

monokuma: can i go now

 

chia pet: *my big green orbs point downwards* yeah i guess sigh

 

sex of sex: ur nuts are green!?????? ?!!?!?!?

 

chia pet: I MEAN MY EYES DUMB BITCH

 

sex of sex: nut mold

 

god damn it akechi: nut mold

 

sex of sex: NOLD

 

god damn it akechi: NOLD!!

 

chia pet: SHUT THE UCK FUP

 

mum: go the fuck to sleep all of you

 

underpanta: moms mad

 

pian-oh no: guys please its 3 in the fucking morning

 

underpanta: moms2.0 mad

 

assassin’s teeth: WHO'S PLAYING HOES MAD AT FULL VOLUME IM GONNA ASSASSINATE YOU

 

underpanta: YOU RECOGNIZED IT?!?!!?!?!?!?!?

 

assassin’s teeth

 

assassin’s teeth: FUCK YOU

 

underpanta: hoes mad

 

assassin’s teeth  has gone offline

 

pian-oh no: TURN THE MUSIC OOOOFFFF

 

panic! at the everywhere: BEFORE KOKICHI DIES

 

monokuma: lol toes mad

 

monokuma  left the chat