Chapter 1: Man, oh Man
DAT_BOII added RookBlonko, Oh_Shit_Waddup, and luck-had-nothing-to-do-with-it into a new group chat.
DAT_BOII changed the name to DEFENDERS OF THE UNIVERSE
Oh_Shit_Waddup : we aren’t voltron, ben
DAT_BOII : I CALL PIDGE
Oh_Shit_Waddup : what why you’re more like keith
DAT_BOII : THE COLOR COORDINATION
luck-had-nothing-do-with-it : why are you yelling ben
RookBlonko : His caps lock key is stuck, Ms. Gwendolyn.
Oh_Shit_Waddup : rook your name is boring full offense
RookBlonko : What?
luck-had-nothing-to-do-with-it : what kevin is saying is why dont you try and change it so it can be more like ours
DAT_BOII : LIKE A NICKNAME
RookBlonko : Oh. What should my nickname be, then?
luck-had-nothing-to-do-with-it : just give it to ben hes great at coming up with nicknames
Oh_Shit_Waddup : yeah he chose ours.
RookBlonko : Well, I guess.
RookBlonko changed name to ~SpaceKitty~
Oh_Shit_Waddup : ahhah hben why
~SpaceKitty~ : Yes, I do not understand this. Rath is more like a cat than I am.
DAT_BOII : YES, BUT NOW WE CAN GO BACK TO VOLTRON SEAMLESSLY
luck-had-nothing-to-do-with-it : wow really ben
DAT_BOII : YES GWEN IS KEITH
luck-had-nothing-to-do-with-it : why
DAT_BOII : BECAUSE COLOR COORDINATION DEAREST COUSIN
DAT_BOII : ROOK IS HUNK BC THEYRE BOTH SWEET SUMMER CHILDREN
~SpaceKitty~ : I take it you will have me watch this show with you after my monitor duty.
DAT_BOII : YES KEVIN YOU ARE LANCE
luck-had-nothing-to-do-with-it : what both kevin and keith are lot similar half-aliens with mullets
Oh_Shit_Waddup : and lance might die
DAT_BOII : FIRST NO LANCE WILL NOT DIE
DAT_BOII : SECONDLY I MAKE THE RULES HERE GDI
Oh_Shit_Waddup : thens who shiro
DAT_BOII : GRANDPA MAX DUH
~SpaceKitty~ : Would Magister Tennyson be upset to hear about this?
luck-had-nothing-to-do-with-it : probs not
Oh_Shit_Waddup : what about Allura and Coran
DAT_BOII : ALLURA IS GM VERDONA AND CORAN IS YOUR DAD KEVIN
Oh_Shit_Waddup : HWO dare you
~SpaceKitty~ : Magister Tennyson is making round please stop so I do not get in trouble.
Oh_Shit_Waddup : my dad deserves to be shiro tbfh
DAT_BOII : FUCK YOU KEVIN
~SpaceKitty~ : Magister Tennyson is
luck-had-nothing-to-do-with-it : rip rook
Oh_Shit_Waddup : change your name pls its so loong
DAT_BOII : LET ME PLS
luck-had-nothing-to-do-with-it : k
luck-had-nothing-to-do-with-it changed name to The~Luckiest~Lesbian
Oh_Shit_Waddup : nice
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : i agree
~SpaceKitty~ : Ben, I have to stay over now, and Magister Tennyson says that you should stop stop saying the f-word, and that it is a bad english word.
Oh_Shit_Waddup : #LetBenSayFuck2k17
~SpaceKitty~ : No! Do not let Ben say the f-word.
~SpaceKitty~ : Gwendolyn please help me.
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : #LetBenSayFuck2k17™
~SpaceKitty~ : Why did you trademark that Kevin said it first.
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : yes, but I trademarked it first so its mine
DAT_BOII : OKAY SO KEVIN CAN YOU COME PICK ME UP AT 5
DAT_BOII : I GOT DETENTION AGAIN
Oh_Shit_Waddup : what did you do
DAT_BOII : PUNCHED ALBEDO
DAT_BOII : ALSO #IDOWHATIWANT™
~SpaceKitty~ : Why did you punch your clone?
DAT_BOII : HE CHALLENGED ME TO A FIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF HISTORY CLASS
DAT_BOII : I WAS BORED
DAT_BOII : MAY I REITERATE #IDOWHATIWANT™
Oh_Shit_Waddup : did he get detention
DAT_BOII : YES BUT WE'RE GOING TO LEAVE HIM HERE
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : BEn
DAT_BOII : GO MAKEOUT WITH CHARMCASTER
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : Fine i will
~SpaceKitty~ : I will leave, too, before I get into more trouble.
DAT_BOII : SO KEVIN Y/N?
Oh_Shit_Waddup : Sure but who would albedo be?
DAT_BOII : LOTOR
Oh_Shit_Waddup : and vilgax is zarkon
DAT_BOII : YEET
DAT_BOII added ~SpaceKitty~, Oh_Shit_Waddup, The~Luckiest~Lesbian, and ShadowTheHedgeFrog into a groupchat
DAT_BOII named that chat DOES ALBEDO IS GAY???????
DAT_BOII : SO ALBEDO HAS A CRUSH ON SOMEONE
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : tell me ben tell me
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : DOnt you dare tennyson
Oh_Shit_Waddup : your name al
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : do not call me al, and benjamin choose it for me for some asinine reason
Oh_Shit_Waddup : imposter
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : excuse me
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : faker
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : what
DAT_BOII : ITS VILGAX
DAT_BOII : ALBEDO HAS A CRUSH ON VILGAX
~SpaceKitty~ : What?
Oh_Shit_Waddup : I CANT BREATHE
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : THEN DIE LEVIN
~SpaceKitty~ : I do not think I should know this.
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : no one should know this
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : you dug your grave tennyson
The~Luckist~Lesbian : Albedo i have a very serious set of questions please answer them close as to the truth as possible
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : Okay?????
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : what gender do you identify as
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : male
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : have you always had a romance/sexual interest in the same sex/gender as you
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : No, i usually didn’t think of anyone as that
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : is vilgax the only one you have thought of in this way
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : no,
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : Have they all been male?
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : yes
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : when did these feelings start to arise
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : sometime after being stranded on earth
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : before or after the permanent dna combined
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : after
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : Ben’s dna made you gay congrats
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : WHAT
DAT_BOII : ITS GENETIC GWENDOLYN'S GAY TOO
Oh_Shit_Waddup : haha this is amazing
~SpaceKitty~ : How did you learn of Albedo’s crush on Vilgax, Ben?
DAT_BOII : WE WERE TALKING IN DETENTION AND I FIGURED IT OUT LOL
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : what is gay, how has ben dna gave it to me, is it fatal
Oh_Shit_Waddup : oh go thid is hillarous
DAT_BOII : NOT IS NOT LEVIN< GWEN PLEASE EXPLIAN I CNT
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : why cant you?
DAT_BOII : BC I CANT EXPLAIN SOMEHTIGN SERIOUS WHILE IM YELLING
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : fine Albedo, you know about sexualtiys right?
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : no
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : okay well, when a male is sexually attracted to a female only or vise vesra they are heterosexual
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : if someone is sexually attracted to both male and female then they are bisexuals, even though sometimes it can tilt one way or the other
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : Alright where does gay come in
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : im getting to it,,, sometimes someone is not sexually attracted but can be romantically attracted, so there is asexual and romanctics,
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : I for instance am homosexual, and panromantic,
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : Pansexuals would be sexually attracted to all genders, and would be leaning towards some genders maybe, you do know about how multiple genders right
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : Yes, alien species sometimes have members that do not have a gender, or are multi-gender including Galvans, I believe that Azmuth switches between male and what you humans call nonbinary
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : im glad you understand, well, people who are sexually attracted to members of the same sex, are called homosexuals, but since the word homosexual is long we shortened it to gay, and lesbian
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : gay for men, and lesbian for female, straight is hetero, and for almost all the rest of the sexualitys are just the prefixes, ex: bi
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : you and Ben are both gay, which is why I made a little joke about how he made you gay
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : its also okay if your sexuality changes because things about you change, and you realize things so if you become sexually attracted to someone of the opposite gender than that’s fine!
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : Ben was really scared to come out as gay since he had dated julie for a bit, but he did come to terms with his sexuality, and so did everyone else.
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : I see, thank you, i believe then I am a homosexual
DAT_BOII : COOL! WE CAN GOSSIP ABOUT UGLY BOYS ARE AT SCHOOL
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : they are quite hideous
Oh_Shit_Waddup : may i remind you of vilgax
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : shut it levin
~SpaceKitty~ : I did not know any of this either. I think I am going to research this further.
DAT_BOII : K IF YOU HAVE ANY QUESTIONS I WOULD ASK GM OR GWEN
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : Levin have you figured your terms for this?
Oh_Shit_Waddup : Pansexual baby~
DAT_BOII : WHY YOU ASKING ALBEDO HMMMMMMM
DAT_BOII : WHY ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : how did you do that show me
DAT_BOII : K
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : (ง°ل͜°)ง
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : Ben says this one looks like its going to fight i like it
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : thats adorable
DAT_BOII : ლ,ᔑ•ﺪ͟͠•ᔐ.ლ
Oh_Shit_Waddup : JFC THATS SCARY
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : You are weak levin
DAT_BOII : (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧
DAT_BOII : ITS GWEN
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : Aw that;s adorable ben
DAT_BOII : ✿◕ ‿ ◕✿
DAT_BOII : ITS CHARMCASTER
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : im gonna show her
The~Luckiest~Lesbian: she says that its adorable
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : its kevin ಠ益ಠ
Oh_Shit_Waddup : you come into my house
DAT_BOII : (づ｡◕‿‿◕｡)づ ITS ROOK
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : i am not at your house do you have a house.
Oh_Shit_Waddup : YOU COME INTO MY HOUSE
DAT_BOII : ITS ME (￣。￣)～ｚｚｚ
DAT_BOII : ITS KEVIN ᕙ(⇀‸↼‶)ᕗ
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : Ben kevin is bullying me
Oh_Shit_Waddup : LIES BEN you’d beleive me over him right
DAT_BOII : KEVIN ITS FIVE WHERE ARE YOU
Oh_Shit_Waddup : you distracted me im omw
DAT_BOII : K IMMA MAKE A NEW CHAT
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : why
DAT_BOII : SO I CAN TALK TO CHARMCASTER
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : ben no
DAT_BOII added The~Luckiest~Lesbian and Bi+Witch=Bitch into a groupchat.
DAT_BOII named the chat RIVALS=CRUSHES.
Bi+Witch=Bitch : Shouldn’t Levin Be In Here Then
DAT_BOII : YES KANAYA BUT HE IS DRIVING
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : We’ve talked about making homestuck references around me
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : its sad that neither of you listen to me and I know who Kanaya is
DAT_BOII : I CANT HELP IT
Bi+Witch=Bitch : sorry babe its ben’s fault
DAT_BOII : HOW
Bi+Witch=Bitch : Because it is
DAT_BOII : CANT AGURE WITH THAT LOGIC
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : *awkward silence*
DAT_BOII : DID YO FORGET YOUR LINES?
Bi+Witch=Bitch : keep your tumblr bullshit outta here
DAT_BOII : MAKE ME
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : see this is why i dont like you two talking to each other
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : you edn blocking each other or cc uses magic to mess with Ben
DAT_BOII : LSKAJFKL:JJ:DKLFFDJKLFDKLADJL:ADJ:KLSA
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : see?
Bi+Witch=Bitch : I didnt do that gwendolyn
DAT_BOII : KEVIN TRIED TO KILL ME
DAT_BOII added Oh_Shit_Waddup into RIVALS=CRUSHES
DAT_BOII : YOU TRIED TO KILL ME
Oh_Shit_Waddup : i did not we were far enough from the squirrel
DAT_BOII : YOU SWERVED AT 80 MPH AND THE ONLY REASON WE DIDNT DIE IS BECAUSE YOUR FANCY ASS CAR
DAT_BOII : I ALMOST DIED, ME
DAT_BOII : DO YOU KNOW HOW ANTICLIMATIC THAT WOULD BE
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : thats what your worried about
DAT_BOII : OF COURSE I AM THE OWNER OF THE OMNITRIX I DESERVE DIE IN AN EPIC BATTLE
Oh_Shit_Waddup : first off no you dont
Bi+Witch=Bitch : Ben deserves to die in a firey ball of death way
DAT_BOII : THANK YOU
DAT_BOII : SO GLAD TO KNOW WE’LL STOP ARGUING OVER MY DEATH
Oh_Shit_Waddup : why is she here
Bi+Witch=Bitch : Problem levin?
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : no fighting i mean it.
DAT_BOII : GWEN IS THE QUEEN OF THE LAND LISTEN TO HER
Bi+Witch=Bitch : i already do ★~(◡﹏◕✿)
DAT_BOII : ARENT YALL GOING ON A DATE TONIGHT
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : yes we are and you should ask cooper to fix phone seriously
DAT_BOII : K *DABS OUT*
Bi+Witch=Bitch : I cant believe youre dating that levin
Oh_Shit_Waddup : I know he’s amazing
Chapter 2: This Bitch Back
idk man seriously
DAT_BOII added Coopah-King, Sparky-Boom-Man, Oh_Shit_Waddup, Fast&Fabulous, Spikey-Boy, Fight_ME, and The~Luckiest~Lesbian into a groupchat.
DAT_BOII named the chat IT’S_NOT_GAY_IF_ITS_IN_SPACE
DAT_BOII : COOPERRRRRRRRRRR I NEED YOU TO FIX MY PHONE
DAT_BOII : THE CAPS LOCK IS STUCK
Coopah-King : i can see that
Fight_ME : ben the chat name
DAT_BOII : YES ITS BEAUTIFUL I KNOW
Fast&Fabulous : manny we know about your genderfluid s/o
Fight_ME : ALLEN WHY DID YOU TELL HER
Sparky-Boom-Man : IM SORRY
Sparky-Boom-Man : she guilted out of me
Oh_Shit_Waddup : i think the only straight is peirce
Spikey-Boy : how dare you
Spikey-Boy : im bi, and currently dating a very very pretty girl
Fast&Fabulous : literally he’ll talk about her for hours please kill me
Spikey-Boy : like you dont talk about Shar for days on end
DAT_BOII : AS IN ROOK SHAR?
Fast&Fabulous : yes?
DAT_BOII : THATS ROOKS LITTLE SISTER RIP HELEN
Oh_Shit_Waddup : what song can i play at your funeral helen?
Oh_Shit_Waddup : im thinking cobra starships
Oh_Shit_Waddup : or da wae
Fast&Fabulous : play either of those and i will come back to life just to destroy you
Spikey-Boy : whose rook?
DAT_BOII : MY NEW PARTNER SINCE GWEN AND KEVIN LEFT ME
Oh_Shit_Waddup : IM SORRY okay
Oh_Shit_Waddup : how can i make it up to you?
Oh_Shit_Waddup : @Coopah-King how do i do a lenny face
DAT_BOII : LJKJKLJAKSDJKJLKDJF
Fight_ME : Cooper is busy
Spikey-Boy : doing what?
Fight_ME : flirting
Fight_ME : badly
DAT_BOII : DID COOP FINALLY FIND HIS PEACH
DAT_BOII : OR MARIO
Spikey-Boy : that’s not how it works, Koopa King dealt with the Mushroom Princess, redhead and had no name, Bowser deals with peach
DAT_BOII : WHO DEALS WITH DAISY
Oh_Shit_Waddup : wait what about the monkey who does he deal with
Spikey-Boy : No one deals with daisy, donkey kong deals with pauline
Fight_ME : the chick with the stars
Spikey_Boy : no that’s rosalina
DAT_BOII : THAT'S NOT FAIR TO DAISY
Fast&Fabulous : What about cooper and his Mushroom princess
Fight_Me : it’s a boy so technially would it be his mario?
Fast&Fabulous : Arent they romatic rivals
DAT_BOII : MARIO AND BOWSER GIVE OFF GAY VIBES IM SRRY BUT THEMS THE FACT
Oh_Shit_Waddup : i had this weird ass dream once where i babysitted bowser and marios kids so
Spikey_Boy : mario is bi
DAT_BOII : PIERCE SUPPORTS US ITS CANON
Fast&Fabulous : TELL US ABOUT COOPER AND HIS MARIO
Fight_ME : why would mario and bowser let kevin babysit their kids
Fast&Fabulous : sdfhjklsdhfkjhdsfjhdf
Oh_Shit_Waddup : okay so there was like bowser first adopted seven kids + bowser jr, and then there was like seven hybrids and idk but i think mario was kidnapped or smtn so bowser had to leave to get him, but all the kids decided to follow their dad to rescue their other dad, so i had to get them before bowser knew about it.
Oh_Shit_Waddup : SO all the kids, me and bowser are in whatever castle of the dude that kidnap Mario and and mario is PISSED like i hid behind the column bullshit, and all the kids had this shiteating grin, they knew what they were doing. And i woke up
Coopah-King : what the
Coopah-King : wait all the kids so seven adopted + bowser jr + the hybrids
Oh_Shit_Waddup : yup
DAT_BOII : I WANNA PLAY THAT GAME
Spikey-Boy : same
Coopah-King : MANNY PLEASE DONT TELL THEM WHO I WAS FLIRTING WITH PLEASE
Fight_ME sent an image [gwen make allen some mario cosplay]
DAT_BOII : IT WAS ALLEN?????? @Sparky-Boom-Man
Sparky-Boom-Man :IOFLAJFASLKJ I HATE ALL OF YOU
DAT_BOII: NO YOU DONT
Sparky-Boom-Man : only you ben and cooper
Oh_Shit_Waddup : make a chat with all plumber kids
DAT_BOII : GOTCHA
DAT_BOII added ~SpaceKitty~, Coopah-King, Fast&Fabulous, Fight_ME, Oh_Shit_Waddup, ShadowTheHedgeFrog, Sparky-Boom-Man, Spikey-Boy, StarSludge, and The~Luckiest~Lesbian into a groupchat.
DAT_BOII named the chat SAVING-THE-UNIVERSE-WITH-LOVE .
StarSludge : boii
DAT_BOII : YES
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : Ben, explain now.
DAT_BOII : ALL THE PLUMBERS IN ONE GROUPCHAT
Fast&Fabulous : wait is that albedo
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : how do you know who i am
Fast&Fabulous: you told me you didnt have this app
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : helen? Oh i lied
Spikey-Boy : he isnt even ashamed
Fight_ME : ME BICH
StarSludge : Ben how dare you not introduce me
DAT_BOII : THIS MY SECOND COUSIN LUCY AND SHES A SLUDGEPUPPY
StarSludge : yup thats me
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : does she have the gay like you and gwen?
Fight_ME : ‘have the gay’
StarSludge : im ace ;0
StarSludge : no wait ;)
StarSludge : thats better
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : thats? asexual right?
StarSludge : yup! ace ace baby ~
DAT_BOII : IM GAY ALLEN YOURE NEXT
Sparky-Boom-Man : im bi
Fight_ME : why are we talking about this
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : so albedo feels more comfortable with his sexuality
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : ive been researching terms
Fight_ME : well i chose not have labels, i don’t like them, and im comfortable with that
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : not having a label is acceptable?
DAT_BOII : OF COURSE IF YOU DONT WANT A LABEL YOU DONT NEED ONE BUT BY ASSOCIATION YOURE WITH THE LGBT+ COMMUNITY
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : Lesbian, gay, bi, transgender, plus community correct?
Fast&Fabulous : correct
Fast&Fabulous : im bi
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : as much as i like learning about new things, can we please change the topic, like memes?
DAT_BOII : AHHHH ALBEDO WANTS MEMES MORE THAN KNOWLEDGE IM SO PROUD
Oh_Shit_Waddup : @The~Luckiest~Lesbian do the untumblrized meme but with ben 10 and ben 23
DAT_BOII : IM OFFENDED
Spikey_Boy : im sorry whom
~SpaceKitty~ : it is alternative timeline ben, i believe our ben is ben prime, correct?
DAT_BOII : YEP, IM THE ORIGINAL
Fight_ME : what how many ben’s are there
DAT_BOII : SO THERE’S ME, BEN 23, BEN 10,000, GWEN 10, ARGIT 10 (KILL ME), NEGA BEN, ALBEDO, MAD BEN, EON, BAD BEN, BENZARRO, NO WATCH BEN,
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : wait why am i up there
DAT_BOII : BECAUSE YOU FOUGHT WITH VILGAX AND THE OTHER ME”S AGAINST NW BEN
Fight_ME : man living on the other side of the galaxy from ben has gotten boring,
Fast&Fabulous : argit 10
Spikey-Boy : the timeline god abandoned
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : kevin keeps playing ‘everybody knows shits fucked’ and im
Coopah-King : no thanks
Chapter 3: i like sidecharacters
aliensarereal - Ken Tennyson (Gwen's brother)
baseball - Jonesy (the kid in the Omniverse episode where z'skayr was in a flashback)
Fix-My-Car-Benjamin - Mr. Baumann
MoneyMoneyMoney - Eddie (the kid in the OS with the Bermuda triangle)
Sarcasm - Kai Green (Yall know)
Villgax - Vilgax
Amino-Acids - Dr. Amino (i think yall know)
Bro - Fistrook
Eon - Eon
Hunter - Kyhber (Omniverse hunter)
Nail-Polish - Thumbskull
Onions-And-Fish - AcidBreathe
Rich-12-YO - Billy Billions
Rojo - Rojo (OS, red girl)
Shiny-Black-Opal - Michael Morningstar
Snatched - Frightwig
Professor-Para - Professor Paradox
24th-Alien - Ben 23
AngerTM - Nega Ben
Catcus-Weed - Mad Ben
ClownsAreStillScary - Benzarro
I-Just-Want-My-Watch-Back - No Watch Ben
It's-A-Bat - Bad Ben
DAT_BOII : @The~Luckiest~Lesbian DO YOU REMEMBER EDDIE
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : eddie?
DAT_BOII : EDDIE GRANDSMITH
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : oh? Your first bf?
DAT_BOII : YEAH
Oh_Shit_Waddup : um what
DAT_BOII : I WAS TEN
DAT_BOII : THE FIRST BOY I LIKED
DAT_BOII : ANYWAY HE’S HERE IN BELLWOOD
Bi+Witch=Bitch : i think kevins gonna get jealous
Oh_Shit_Waddup : mike
Bi+Witch=Bitch : shut up
DAT_BOII : UGH BILLYS FIGHTING BYE
Oh_Shit_Waddup : who the fuck is billy
Bi+Witch=Bitch : a kid thats is mentally 16 but stuck in a ten year old body that hates ben, because ben is a hero of the story
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : honestly? Can i fight him
Bi+Witch=Bitch : i would say yes but he’s too busy fighting ben
Oh_Shit_Waddup : are you just watching
Bi+Witch=Bitch : yeah, boy scout is fine tho
DAT_BOII : DONT CALL ME BOY SCOUT
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : aren’t you fighting billy
DAT_BOII : WE”RE DONE NOW
Oh_Shit_Waddup : so who exactly is this eddie character
DAT_BOII : A FRIEND?????
DAT_BOII : GIVE ME A MINUTE ILL MAKE A CHAT FOR ALL MY CIVILIAN FRIENDS
DAT_BOII added aliensarereal, baseball, Fix-My-Car-Benjamin, and MoneyMoneyMoney into a groupchat.
DAT_BOII changed the chat name to Citizens.
aliensarereal : ben??
DAT_BOII : YES KEN??
baseball : whats going on?
DAT_BOII : IM PUTTING ALL MY NONFIGHTING FRIENDS IN A GC
Fix-My-Car-Benjamin : am i really your friend, tho
aliensarereal : fucking savage
Fix-My-Car-Benjamin : watch your language kenneth tennyson
aliensarereal : mr baumann??
Fix-My-Car-Benjamin : yes
baseball : im dead lol
MoneyMoneyMoney : BENNY!!!!!!!!!
DAT_BOII : EDDIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
aliensarereal : how does kevin feel about you talking to your first bf?
DAT_BOII : KEVIN IS MATURE HE CAN DEAL WITH ME TALKING TO ONE OF MY FRIENDS THANK YOU VERY MUCH
Fix-My-Car-Benjamin : and if he can’t, dump him
DAT_BOII : ^^^^^^^^^
baseball : im not at all shocked that mr baumann is the most savage here
DAT_BOII : I JUST REALIZED SMTHN
DAT_BOII added Sarcasm into Citizens.
Sarcasm : what am i doing here?
DAT_BOII : YOURE NOT A PLUMBER YOU NEVER WENT TO THE ACADEMY SO YOUR TECHNICALLY A FREELANCER HOLY HILL
Sarcasm : first all fuck you
Fix-My-Car-Benjamin : Language.
Vilgax added Animo-Acids, Bro, Eon, Hunter, Nail-Polish, Onions-And-Fish, Rich-12-YO, Rojo, ShadowTheHedgeFrog, Shiny-Black-Opal, Snatched into a groupchat.
Vilgax named the chat let's-kill-Ben-Tennyson.
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : let’s not????
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : did yall forget that im supposed to be redeemed
Bro : pussy
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : no thx im gay
Rich-12-YO : what the shit
Vilgax : im started to regret this
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : then kick me out!!!
Onions-and-Fish : why don’t you want kill Ben?
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : because im redeemed.
ShadowTheHedgeFrog added DAT_BOII into let's-kill-Ben-Tennyson.
DAT-BOII : ALBEDO WHAT THE FUCK
Vilgax : who is in my group chat to discuss the upcoming fall of tennyson.
DAT_BOII : TENNYSON.
Bro : bro
DAT_BOII : HOW DO YOU HAVE YOUR PHONE YOURE SUPPOSED TO BE IN JAIL
Bro : i bro-ke out
DAT_BOII : IM GOING TO KILL YOU ISTG
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : please kick us out
Rojo : no one knows how
DAT_BOII : HOLY SHIT YOURE STILL ALIVE????? I THOUGHT I KILLED THE NEGATIVE TEN - CC
Rojo : you didn’t kill us moron
Rojo : ive just been in remission so get ready
DAT_BOII : OKAY RED
DAT_BOII : WHO THE FUCK IS SHINY BLACK OPAL
Shiny-Black-Opal : Aww, Benjamin. I’m hurt that you could forget me.
Shiny-Black-Opal : It’s Michael Darkstar.
DAT_BOII : I CANT STOP GAGGING????????
~SpaceKitty~ : is ben okay
~SpaceKitty~ sent a picture [i need more medical knowledge on humans]
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : he’s just gagging for some reason
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : he is actually gagging, it’s beautiful
Oh_Shit_Waddup : what happened
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : i added him to a gc that’s full of his enemies trying to kicked out but none of them know how so they started introducing themselves and junk and we got to a Michael Darkstar?? I have no clue who that is
Bi+Witch=Bitch : add me
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : no dont
Bi+Witch=Bitch : the fact that he actually gagging at the mention of mike is beautiful
Fast&Fabulous : who else is in the chat
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : animo, uhh acidbreathe, fistrick, thumbskull, frightwig, rojo, some guy with the name ‘rich-12-yo’, mike, vilgax, eon, me, ben, some dude named hunter??
~SpaceKitty~ : and ben hasn’t killed fistrick yet?
Sparky-Boom-Man : why does he hate fistrick?
~SpaceKitty~ : fistrick kissed him a few months ago, and ben hates the way he talks
Oh_Shit_Waddup : where does this fistrick live??
Spikey-Boy : am i the only one shocked at vilgax in a groupchat
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : he made it
Fight_ME : ahh who is vilgax again
Coopah-King : oh biggest mood
Fast&Fabulous : never say that again
Sparky-Boom-Man : wait whose ‘rich-12-yo; and hunter???
~SpaceKitty~: billy billions, and i believe khyber
Oh_Shit_Waddup : tell khyber to met me behind mr slushy #16 @ 2 am for a fist fight
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : would you like me to challenge fistrick too
Oh_Shit_Waddup : YES
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : so someone wants to fistfight a khyber????
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : and fistrick
Hunter : and who would dare to challenge me
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : kevin levin
Shiny-Black-Opal : Oh, Kevin is quite a handful.~
Shiny-Black-Opal : Would you like any help?
DAT_BOII : I JUST STOPPED GAGGING AND NOW ITS BACK
Hunter : Where is the duel?
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : Mr. Slushy #16 at 2 am.
Hunter : where is that
DAT_BOII : HA
Shiny-Black-Opal : Now, why is our Benjamin laughing?
DAT_BOII : BECAUSE KHYBER”S WEIRD HUNTER CODE HE HAS TO ACCEPT THE FIGHT BUT ONLY KEVIN AND ME KNOWS WHICH ONE IS #16, AND SINCE THERES 22 MR SLUSHYS HE CANT JUST GUESS
Bro : why does he want to thorw down with me
DAT_BOII : ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : anyway ben are you just gonna spam this chat with memes
DAT_BOII : NOW I AM
Rojo : why al
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : my name is albedo
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : i hate this chat
Animo-Acids : why would you forsaken us though
DAT_BOII : YOU GUYS KINDA DERSERVE IT
Snatched : wait what if we keep tennyson up so he cant get sleep and energy
DAT_BOII : ILL JUST MUTE THE CHAT
Vilgax : wait you can do that
DAT_BOII : YUPPO
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : why do the villains even need a gc
Onions-and-Fish : don’t judge us
DAT_BOII : IM TAKING A NAP BYE
Professor-Para added 24th-Alien, AngerTM, Cactus-Weed, ClownsAreStillScary, DAT_BOII, Eon, I-Just-Want-My-Watch-Back, It's-A-Bat, and ShadowTheHedgeFrog into a groupchat.
Professor-Para named the chat A-Bunch-of-Bens.
DAT_BOII : NOICE
I-Just-Want-My-Watch-Back : whats going on
DAT_BOII : GC WITH ALL BENS + ALBEDO
Eon : this is silly
AngerTM : i agree
Professor-Para : maybe we should all introduce ourselves
24th-Alien : ben 23
AngerTM : then why are you the 24th alien?????
24th-Alien : it’s for a movie coming up
Cactus-Weed : GUESS WHOS REDEEMED MOTHER FUCKERS
Eon : why the fuck are you redeemed
Cactus-Weed : because i deadass have nothing.
DAT_BOII : SAME
Cactus-Weed : you have friends
I-Just-Want-My-Watch-Back : im as yall probably guessed no watch ben
DAT_BOII : WE CALL YOU NW BEN FOR SHORT
I-Just-Want-My-Watch-Back : whose we
DAT_BOII : GWEN, KEVIN, AND ROOK, BASICALLY ALL MY FRIENDS
AngerTM : wait whose Kevin
ClownsAreStillScary : and rook
DAT_BOII : KEVIN LEVIN????? AND ROOK”S THIS SUPER COOL ALIEN DUDE
Cactus-Weed : Kevin???? Bruh and you haven’t killed him yet?
DAT_BOII : NO?
Cactus-Weed : tragic
AngerTM : wait the dude that’s been trying to kill us since we were 10?
ClownsAreStillScary : i literally don’t know either of those people
I-Just-Want-My-Watch-Back : can we get back to introductions?
Cactus-Weed : im the ben that lives in that desert world, that really isn’t a desert anymore
DAT_BOII : MAD BEN
AngerTM : wait why is he mad ben
DAT_BOII : HIS WORLD REMINDS ME OF MOVIE CALLED MAD MAX SO
AngerTM : wait let’s guess by your nicknames if they’re correct
DAT_BOII : OKAY??? SO THERES BAD BEN THAT JUST LOOKS LIKE ME BUT WITH BLACK HAIR
Its-A-Bat : listne i cna dey my hria ayn way i wnat
DAT_BOII : HOLY SHIT
AngerTM : even I can’t spell that bad in as gwen calls them ‘my moods’
Cactus-Weed : what does that say
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : ‘listen i can dye my hair anyway i want’
DAT_BOII : ALBEDO THANKS
AngerTM : isn’t albedo the albino one that really isn’t a alternate dismension??
DAT_BOII : YES
Cactus-Weed : continue
DAT_BOII : THERE”S NEGA BEN THAT WEARS A JACKET AND HAS EMO HAIR
AngerTM : that-a me
DAT_BOII : FINALLY BENZARRO
ClownsAreStillScary : i’m guessing that’s me
aliensarereal : @DAT_BOII do you even know how to fix a car
DAT_BOII : SINCE IVE BEEN FIXING MR BAUMANN”S CAR SINCE I WAS 7 YEAH
DAT_BOII : I MEAN I DONT KNOW THE ACTUAL NAMES OF THE PARTS I JUST CALL THEM “THE ONE SPINNY THING THAT NEEDS TO BE ELECTROCED TO SPIN”
Fix-My-Car-Benjamin : It took calling Max to translate what he wanted
DAT_BOII : YEAH A SCREAMING 7 YEAR OLD DEMANDING A SPATULA SCREW WHILE A MAN WEARING A CANDY STRIPED SHIRT ON THE PHONE SCREAMING THAT HE DOESN”T UNDERSTAND GOT ALOT OF OUR NEIGHBORS CALLED THE POLICE AND THE DOCTORS
Chapter 4: smae
Princess started a conversation with DAT_BOII
Princess : Benjamin Tenjamin
DAT_BOII : IM GONNA FUCKING KILL KEVIN ISTG
DAT_BOII : ITS BEN TENNYSON, LOOMA
Princess : ok BEN TENNYSON
DAT_BOII : YEAH THAT'S FINE
DAT_BOII : SO WHAT DID YOU WANT TO TALK ABOUT
Princess : that princess that i fought for your hand, do you have her information on this chatting app?
DAT_BOII : IF YOU MEAN DO I HAVE HER CHAT HANDLE THAN YES WHY
Princess : i wish to speak to her
DAT_BOII : YOU DO KNOW THAT I, AS A PLUMBER, NEED TO BE PRESENT IN ALL CONTACTS BETWEEN MONARCHS
Princess : just do it
DAT_BOII added Princess, and TheFrogPrincess into a groupchat.
TheFrogPrincess : ben what is this
DAT_BOII : LOOMA WANTED TO TALK TO YOU, BUT SINCE IM IN PLUMBERS I HAVE TO LIKE READ YALL CONVERSATION
Princess : i didn’t know that you could have multiple people in a chat
DAT_BOII : ITS CALLED A GROUP CHAT
TheFrogPrincess : name the gc dammit
DAT_BOII : LOOMA DONT REPEAT WHAT ATTEA SAYS
Princess : dammit
DAT_BOII named the groupchat Can-I-Please-Fight-Someone
DAT_BOII : I THOUGHT IT FIT
TheFrogPrincess : TI DOES HOLY SHIT
DAT_BOII : STOP CURSING
DAT_BOII : ATTEA KEEPS TRYING TO GET LOOMA TO CURSE
DAT_BOII : LSKJFLAKJFLKAF
DAT_BOII : HOW DO I STOP IT
Oh_Shit_Waddup : press f to pay respect
Sparky-Boom-Man : f
StarSludge : f
Fight_ME : f
Fast&Fabulous : f
Spikey-Boy : f
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : f
DAT_BOII : YALL WERE FUCKING READY HOLY SHI
~SpaceKitty~ : f
DAT_BOII : NOOO ROOK
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : f
DAT_BOII : I CAN”T BELIEVE THIS
Oh_Shit_Waddup : holy shit this is great
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : i dont even know why but kevin just said to type f in and then enter
DAT_BOII : WAIT ARE YALL HANGING OUT WITHOUT ME
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : yes because you are supposed to be in school right now
DAT_BOII : I AM IN SCHOOL
~SpaceKitty~ : you are currently in history and you need to work on your english project
DAT_BOII : EH TU BRUTE
Fight_ME : why are you speaking french
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : please tell me that you went to school
Fight_ME : i dont know her
Fast&Fabulous : sakldfjskldfjsd WE STAN
Oh_Shit_Waddup : i thought you hated that meme
Spikey-Boy : we started using ironically and now we cant stop
DAT_BOII : WELL ISNT THAT
Fight_ME : dont
DAT_BOII : IRONIC
Coopah-King : are either of you using ironic correctly
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : ben is but pierce isn’t
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : i dont know english that well wait do you want to hear what happened at school with ben and some kids a few days ago
DAT_BOII : LAKLAKJDL NO ALBEDO PLEASE
~SpaceKitty~: that means you have to tell us
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : so a bunch of these assholes were complaining and they were like being racist against aliens
Fight_ME : let me fight em
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : ben did something so much better, he started talking in galvan and cause we have all those hard h’s and quick pronunciation he sounded like demonic, and the kids started freaking out
DAT_BOII : I TPOSED
Oh_Shit_Waddup : for dominance
Sparky-Boom-Man : im crying
ShadowTheHedgeFrog: he was doing time tables and that crap and he was getting some of it wrong and now they think im a demon
Spikey-Boy : i mean, you are basically demonic colored Ben
DAT_BOII : mom kinda mad about too
DAT_BOII : i mean i didn’t tell her that i have an evil dna combined galvan
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : thank you for not calling me your evil clone since none of the kids at school have enough brain matter to understand that simple concept
Oh_Shit_Waddup : no offense but like most normal ass kids don’t talk to aliens
DAT_BOII : GLAD IM NOT
Fight_ME : wait is that why you call it grey matter??? Cause it’s grey and brain matter
DAT_BOII : brain matter is called grey matter
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : plus galvan are tiny compared to humans
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : plus smarts
Oh_Shit_Waddup : STREET SMARTS
Fight_ME : bittenbinder technique
DAT_BOII : THROW HIM OFF HIS RHYTHM
Fast&Fabulous : never go to the secondary location
Spikey-Boy : when you get thrown in the back of a car, reach your little pudgy hand out, tear over the carpet and punch the taillight out
Fight_ME : i think theyre turning left
Coopah-King : HORSE IN A HOSPITAL
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : i guess you could say that i gave my college 120,000 dollars
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : and you have the audacity to ask me for more money??
The~Luckiest~Lesbian: i gave you more money than the civil war cost and you spent it alreadY
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : what kind of cokehead relative is my college
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : YOU SPENT IT ALREADY!!!!
DAT_BOII : THAT WAS BEAUTIFUL
Sparky-Boom-Man : my wife is a bitch and i love her so much
Shadow-The-HedgeFrog : because you know as any chicago police officer knows, a phone book never leaves bruises.
Fight_ME : BEAUTIFUL
Onions-and-Fish : so then this bitch decided she was gonna cut me off in traffic
Onions-and-Fish : so i melted her tires
DAT_BOII : IF YOU EVEN LOOK AT THIS HOSPITAL I WILL STOMP YOU TO DEATH WITH MY HOOVES
Vilgax : what the actual fuck
DAT_BOII : WHOOPIES
DAT_BOII : WRONG GC NVM
Snatched : wait what were yall talking about
DAT_BOII : john mulaney quotes
Hunter : smae
DAT_BOII : BRUH I DO THAT TYOP LIKE 95% OF THE TIME I TYPE SMAE
DAT_BOII : ALKJFA:KLFJ DLKFSJ SEE
Vilgax : ok the first person to kill ben gets money
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : thats what i thought youd say you dumb fucking horse
Vilgax : IOUOROIQUOQWEQw WHAT
DAT_BOII : VILGAX EVEN KEYSMASHES WRONG
Rich-12-YO : i cant believe albedo killed vilgax like that
Bro : hello 911, i would like to report a murder
Snatched : how do you keysmash wrong
DAT_BOII : YOU NEED TO USE ASDFGHJKL;I, the rest are ugle and wrong
Bro : that dumbass typing method
DAT_BOII : it works
Rich-12-YO : wait what typing method
DAT_BOII : ITS CALLED QWERTY
Rich-12-YO : that shit??????
RIch-12-YO : i fucking hate that shit
Rojo : wait i dont remember that crap???
DAT_BOII : YOURE LIKE THIRTY OFC YOU DONT REMEMBER IT
Rojo : BICH
ShadowTheHedgeFrog sent the image [ikilledvilgaxandbenhelpedabit]
DAT_BOII : A BIT?
DAT_BOII : A FUCKING BIT????
DAT_BOII : A MORE THAN A FUCKING BIT THANK YOU??
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : @Fast&Fabulous can you tell me if the picture is incrimanting or anything like that
Fast&Fabulous : it’s just a screenshot
Oh-Shit-Waddup : lkjk;sldjfklsaf STONE COLD ALBEDO STONE COLD
~SpaceKitty~: yes i agree
~SpaceKitty~ : i mean you think he’s attractive
Spikey-Boy : im sorry what
Sparky-Boom-Man : ALBEDO HAS A CRUSH ON WHOM
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : right you weren’t here let me give ya some screenshots
The~Luckiest~Lesbian sent the images [ajokegonewrong-pt1], [ajokegonewrong-pt2], [ajokegonewrong-pt3].
King-Coopah : same
Sparky-Boom-Man : that is a joke gone wrong
Fast&Fabulous : that,,,that is so beautiful
Fight_ME : am i the only one that thinks that how quick albedo was to freak out funny???? Like
Spikey-Boy : no it is funny but it’s even funnier when you realize that albedo has never once sat like a gay
ShadowTheHedgeFrog : sit like a gay??
DAT_BOII : GAYS CAN”T SIT RIGHT OR DRIVE
Oh_Shit_Waddup : yeah but bi’s can
King-Coopah : al;kjsdflkasjd
King-Coopah : not to be stupid on main but i just realized yall have matching names
Spikey-Boy : yall
Fast&Fabulous : yall
Sparky-Boom-Man : yall
~SpaceKitty~ : why does it matter that their names match
Fast&Fabulous : well like usually only couples have matching names on like anything
~SpaceKitty~ : ?
Oh_Shit_Waddup : LKJOJLKJFD I KNEW I FORGOT SOMETHING
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : wow,
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : who would have thought that kevin
Oh_Shit_Waddup : please dont
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : would forget to tell his friends
The~Luckiest~Lesbian : that he’s dating my baby cousin
DAT_BOII: I AM TEN MINUTES YOUNGER THAN YOU OKAY
Fast&Fabulous : IM SORRY WHAT
Fight_ME : IM NOT SORRY HOW COUlD YOU NOT TELL US
~SpaceKitty~: there’s a fight on the surface time to go goodbye
DAT_BOII : TTYL
DAT_BOII : ILL FIX YOUR CAR TOMMORROW AFTER MY SHIFT @ THE PLUMBERS
Fix-My-Car-Benjamin : why am i not surprised
aliens-are-real : wait aren’t you across town from baumann’s shop
DAT_BOII : YES BUT ACCIDENT HAPPEN
Sarcasm : not that shocked
MoneyMoneyMoney : don’t listen to them benny they’re just jealous
DAT_BOII : I KNOW THAT EDDIE
DAT_BOII : GTG
DAT_BOII : I HAVE TO FINISH FIGHTING ROJO