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You've Lost

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“You’ve lost both your legs!” the medic shrieked frantically.

You stare down at the heavily bleeding stumps of what was left of your legs as the pink haired medic tried desperately to bandage it and staunch the bleeding. “It was one thing when you insisted on continuing with one broken leg but now you’ve permanently lost both of them! This pushing it too far!” she hissed, her hands glowing a bright green only to fizzle out abruptly. “You need to stay out of the way before you get killed!” her voice is shrill as she scolds you, pointedly ignoring the sounds of battle around us. You smile and scratch the back of your head weakly. Your hair is matted thick with blood from a head wound you’d received after being slammed through a building wall.

“Maa, maa! I’ll be fine! I’ve dealt with worse.” You insist, “and you know we need every ninja who can fight. The genins were being slaughtered out there.” You try to explain, going for flippant reassurance and falling short. Face it, you’ve been fighting a kage level enemy alongside 3 of your students for hours on a broken leg while other medics searched for surviving genin around the battlefield massacre – you were tired. If Sakura’s face meant anything she knew you were lying through your teeth.

She tried to put chakra into her hands again, but like before, it sparked and then fizzled out. She’d depleted all of her chakra reserves. She couldn’t heal you, and judging by the blood seeping through the thick bandages – having not been slowed down by the material at all – normal field dressing wouldn’t be able to keep you alive long enough for anyone else to do anything either.

You smile weakly, lifting your hand to finger the torn and frayed edges of your mask. “Sakura… don’t waste your energy.” You whisper. You can feel your limbs growing cold, it’s pointless at this point. You know what the brink of death feels like. The only reason you’d never succumbed to it before was because there’ been medics there to save you. The only medic that was still here now, was Sakura, and she was completely burnt out. There was no escaping death now.

And death shouldn’t be that bad. You’d been chasing it’s sweet release for years now. You’d been so alone, and all those that you’d lost wait on the other side. Your mother, whom you’ve never met; your father, who you regret not forgiving; Obito, who you’d never been able to tell how much he’d meant to you; Rin, who’s love you’ve never been able to return, not in the way she’d wanted; Minato, who’d been like a father to him; and Jiraya, who’d understood the emotional pain that came from teaching Naruto.

You’d been chasing death for so long after entering Anbu Black Ops. You’d done so many horrible things and felt so empty. But you’ve done some good too. You’ve helped teach the second generation of sannin – had they not died, you and your teammates would have been the second generation making your students the third – and fought to protect your village for many years.

Your service was over.

The sounds of battle had slowly ceased, and the resounding silence indicated that the fight had been finished. The sound of thunderous footsteps rushing towards you, told you that Sasuke and Naruto had been the victors. A pair of arms gripped your shoulders as you slump, becoming light headed from blood loss. “Kakashi-sensei!” someone yells; it sounds like you’re under water. You can’t tell who’s speaking anymore.

Weakly, you reach up, pulling awkwardly at your mask until it settled under your chin. You smile softly at the blurred bright colours above you; your eyes are glassy. You open your mouth to try and sooth the panicked figures, but all that came out was a warm trickle of blood. Probably from a punctured lung. The figures become even more panicked as they try to fix you, but it’s too late.

You’re gone.