Chapter 1: The Sharpest Lives Are The Deadliest To Lead
Justice is the quality of being just. Jungkook had always thought this description is rather vague. Someone else's ideals are imprinted in society and we must follow them because that's common sense. But then again, what is common sense? The dictionary says sound and prudent judgment based on a simple perception of the situation or facts. However, each person perceives things differently and the distinguishing is difficult to make because even with facts and a certain event, there are humans who will disagree with what seems so simple to other people. You can't go ahead and say that something is wrong to those people - they won't listen.
"Why is it against the law to live as a thief? The government steals from us all the time." One might argue. Behind the juvenile trail of thought hides a truth that no one can deny.
"We are free to do as we please as long as we obey the rules but if there are rules, is that true freedom?" That, as well, is quite silly. If you look back you realize anarchy isn't exactly an ideal paradise. If anything's possible, you start worrying over every single thing and every person you meet makes you anxious.
Jungkook's not here to pass criticism, agree or disagree. He just thinks, ponders and wonders because he, himself, doesn't have answers. Only questions. For example, "Is it wrong to kill if the victim has killed other people?"
When he first asked this question, he was eight. He found out what death is at a young age due to his parents being killed and violated right in front of him. All he could do is cower in fear, cry and pray to a God he's still not sure exists. His teacher in the orphanage slapped his face, "How can you ask such a thing? The answer is obvious."
Jungkook furrowed his eyebrows. "If it is, how come I don't know it?"
"Because you're a stupid child." She sighed, returning to her book and dismissing him.
Yes, indeed. He was a stupid child but who'd blame him. His past was... unfortunate, to say the very least. Each day was greeted with another calamity. Some kids are just born with tragedy in their blood. But that's what made him create his apathetic persona. Once a person believes you couldn't care less, they get less enthusiastic to hurt you. It was unsettling to see Jungkook get beat but he wouldn't react, a blank expression on his pale and skinny face. Bullies had reasons for their issues, he liked to believe that way. Then it made him feel better about not hurting them back but one day he found out that the person who abused him the most was the son of a rich public figure. His family was happy, he knows because he could see the light in his eyes when the boy saw his father, mother, brother and sister. A big, cheerful and perfect family. Jungkook was thirteen when he was cornered in that alley, about to get hit again by the same bully, he finally raised his gaze up, meeting the boy's eyes. "Hey," Jungkook cocked his head. "Why do you bother me?"
Upon hearing him speak, the boy slammed the wall right next to Jungkook's face. "Because it's fun."
"Aren't other things fun, too?" Jungkook seemed to upset him, causing his face to get punched, but that wasn't his intention. "You have a lot of money, friends and you have a family."
"Huh? How is that related? Everyone has it." The boy pulls on Jungkook's hair. "Except trash like you, of course."
Maybe it was jealousy, maybe it was anger, maybe it was the realization he deserved more than to be constantly terrorized whenever he went to school for five years. That doesn't matter. The sudden adrenaline wave washed over him and he grabbed the boy's hand, crushing it with his hand and kicking his stomach. Repeatedly. All while having the same, disinterested expression on his face until the boy on the floor began crying and begged him to stop. "Hmmm." Jungkook hummed to himself, touching the boy's face and the blood from his broken nose taints his hand. "It's weird. I just hurt you like you hurt me but for some reason this feels fair. Hey." He leans close, checking is he's conscious. "Good, you're awake. I was about to speak so I'd like it if you listen," Jungkook forcefully opens the boy's eyes. "It kinda feels like justice is being served, what do you think?"
"Y-You're crazy!" The boy yells in horror, rolling away.
"Well, you're the one getting hit this time. Naturally you wouldn't agree with what I'm saying." Jungkook gets up, brushing off the dust on his pants. Not that it changes anything, they were dirty to begin with. "I'd prefer it if you stopped bothering me or else I'll have to hurt you again and I don't want to unless I have a reason to." Jungkook starts walking away. "You have people who love you, you should cherish that and not let it go to waste."
Of course, since then, he wasn't bullied anymore. Not by that boy and not by his friends.
"You're bloody!" His only friend rushed over to him, as he always did every time Jungkook was hurt. "Here, let me help you." He reaches his small, gentle hand towards the bleeding boy. Jungkook grabbed it, liking the warmth that spread over his whole body. For some reason, that made him forget the spite he had felt before returning to the orphanage.
"You're too kind, Yesung." Jungkook mutters when he feels his friend rubbing some ointment on his face for the wound.
"And you're too reckless." The slightly shorter boy sighs. "Do you have to keep me up late at night just so I can tend to you?"
"It's not my fault you're doting on me." Jungkook pouts, seemingly embarrassed when Yesung leans closer to check the bruise on his cheek.
"In this kind of place, it's important for the older ones to take care of young people like you." He smiles.
"With your height it's hard to believe you're older." Jungkook teases, receiving a flick to the forehead.
"Most people say thank you."
"Yep, yep." Jungkook sits down, resting his head against the wall. "Hey."
"Hmm? What is it?" Yesung settles besides him, holding his hand for comfort.
"Why do you help me so much? I know you say it's because you worry about everyone here but it seems like you take care of me the most."
"Dunno." He says, looking at Jungkook fondly. "I don't like being biased but I think I like you the most."
Jungkook blushes. He feels like a completely different person when he's with Yesung. He doesn't hate the world, God, the orphanage, he doesn't even resent himself. Whenever they're together, Jungkook only thinks of how kind his friend is. "I-If it makes a difference, I like you the most too..." Jungkook admits, somewhat flustered but nevertheless honest.
"Silly you," Yesung laughs. "I already knew that."
One day, Jungkook mindlessly walked by the room of the owner of their orphanage. He would have continued walking if it weren't for the familiar voice of his best friend. It was unusually loud, almost upset sounding. "What do you mean by that? I can't do that!"
Curious, the young boy listened carefully, placing his ear on the door. A voice he didn't quite recognize spoke. "You have shown incredible physical development, you can also use the first aid kit which is extremely useful. Not to mention you're very intelligent. You have great potential."
"But being trained as an assassin? That's ridiculous!" Jungkook's eyes widen at the words spoken. Surely this is a joke, right? There's no way they'd ask a fifteen years old boy to it, right? It's insane. Someone's ill-mannered joke.
"You don't have a choice in the matter." The voice said, sounding angry. "You belong to this orphanage, meaning you belong to us." A noise of something falling to the ground startled Jungkook, along with the sound of his best friend yelling. Without thinking, he opened the door and charged in, biting the hand of the man who was choking Yesung. "What the hell?!" Jungkook avoids the punch the guy aims at him, already an expert at being beaten.
"Jungkook, what are you doing here?" Yesung questions when his friend stands in front of him, using himself as a shield.
"I could ask you the same thing. What's with this talk about being an assassin?" Jungkook questions, in a fighting stance.
"So you've heard us." The man grins, fixing his tie. "It's true, we want to train your little friend here."
"I won't let you take Yesung way." Jungkook scans the room, wondering what he can use as a weapon.
"We don't want him anymore." The smirk on the older man's face scares Jungkook but it doesn't weaken his resolve to protect his dear friend.
"Then go away."
"We want you." He explains.
"Huh?" Jungkook is confused.
"Clearly you're more talented than your friend there, you have good physical abilities, you know how to act in a situation like this but best of all, you don't hesitate to kill or die." The man's vile expression makes Jungkook shudder. "The moment you walked into this room you focused on killing me, searching for a moment to attack even though you can easily tell I have the advantage here. That's admirable. And rare, not anyone can do this. You have the skills I've been looking for, I can't believe I overlooked you when I was going through possible candidates." Jungkook can't even comprehend the moment he's being pushed down to the floor. "We can use someone with your talent in our group."
"Let go of Jungkook." Yesung announces, ready to charge at the man.
"Don't. I'll break his arm." Yesung stops.
"If... If I agree to join, will you leave Yesung alone?" Jungkook asks, staring at the floor he's pressed against.
"Then I agree."
"You're not listening." A voice says, snapping Jungkook from his reminiscing.
"No, sorry." Jungkook yawns tiredly. It's odd too think it's been seven years since then. "What were you saying?"
"The target is approaching, can you shoot him already?" His partner in crime, Yugyeom, said. They were currently at the rooftop with a sniper gun. Jungkook was handling the execution of the mission. He hums in agreement, pulling the trigger. Bullseye. The man is instantly dead, lying down on the floor, covered in filth like he deserves. "You were tired, bored and not focused. I thought you'd miss."
"Waiting for me to slip up?" Jungkook asks, getting ready to leave.
"No way." His partner says but Jungkook knows he's lying.
"Are you still upset I ranked number one while you were number two?" Jungkook wonders out loud, seemingly disinterested in this conversation but thinking about the past made him want to chat a little. "Is that why you keep following me instead of doing your own missions?"
"You have a really nasty personality, you know that?" His 'friend' fakes a sulking expression.
"Well aren't you sharp." Jungkook lost the will he had to speak.
"Hey, you don't seem to have value for human life but for some reason you joined the unit that focused on taking out criminals." Yugyeom keeps bothering Jungkook despite the annoyed expression. "Could it be that you do have a sense of morality? Or do you think you're better than them?"
"You sure talk a lot for someone who doesn't have anything interesting to say." He brushes him off, heading back to the base to let them know the job was done. Yugyeom left for his own mission.
"You're on a roll lately," His boss, Sera, praises. Jungkook doesn't think he ever met someone as cold as her. Even her praise sounds insincere although what she's saying is true.
"Thank you for saying that."
"There's no need to be thankful for facts." She takes out a folder. "I've got a job for you."
She grins. "Saying yes before hearing the content? You really are an assassin in your core, aren't you?"
"Do details matter at this point?" He scoffs, crossing his arms. "Man, woman, young, old, asian, white. At this point they're just adjectives that don't matter. They're criminals that are going to be killed in mere seconds, why waste my time to read about them?"
"Because this time I need you to do something a bit different." She explains, opening the folder to reveal a picture of a rather young looking man. "One of our biggest clients, the World Bringer company, has a request for us."
That piqued his interest. "Which is?"
"They want us to take down the CEO of their biggest competition, Future Foundation." She slides the information to Jungkook. "However, they want to make the CEO suffer before he dies."
"So they want me to torture him?"
"You're too simple minded. They want him to be betrayed by someone he trusts. Heartbroken, one would say." Sera takes a long sip from her coffee. "Apparently this man had manipulated his stocks to get himself more money, stealing from their charity fund."
What a scum, Jungkook thinks. "Then? What do they want me to do?"
Sera seems relieved he asked. "They want you to make Jimin fall for you, manipulate him so he makes bad decisions and then when he loses everything but thinks he still has you, kill him."
"I guess they have bad blood if they want him to go like that." Jungkook almost rolls his eyes. Truthfully he doesn't want this kind of drama in his life. Killing him and ending it right away seems much easier. Emotions only complicate things.
"From the looks of it you don't seem up to the task." She lit up her cigarette. "I know you think feelings are unnecessary and that's why I think you're the best match for this task. You're good at hiding what you really think and because you're so numb, you can fake any behavior you want."
Jungkook wonders if that's true but he assumes it's not too far from reality. "Is he into guys?"
"Yes, it's confirmed. The bonus is that you're his type as far as looks go."
"It's not my skills, it's my looks." Jungkook says, almost bitterly.
"Now, now, it's a combination of both. Don't be upset." She pulls the ashtray closer. "He's hiring employees. Since you're also smart I think you might be able to pass the interview with him and be able to join the company."
"I need to infiltrate his work place?"
"Well with him being the CEO, I understand that's the only time I'll be able to spend time with him." Jungkook exhales. "Sounds like a pain in the ass."
"You're not up for it?"
"I didn't say that." He glares. "What's the guy's name?"
"Who would have guessed you can actually look handsome?" Yugyeom says, sitting on the edge of the window.
"You never have anything important to say, do you?" Jungkook sneers, buttoning up his sleeve. He admits that it's not his favorite type of clothing but he needs to sell himself as a hard working employee or else he'll lose his chance to get hired by Jimin. He wants to leave a good first impression.
"Too bad your looks go to waste with a personality like that." Yugyeom jumps down, landing on the balcony right below them. "I don't want to spend time with a bully like you!" He yells, rushing into the lower floor.
"He should have slipped and fell out of the window." Jungkook murmured to himself, trying his best to not roll his eyes in fear he might become blind.
"Worrying for your ally I see," Sera steps in the room, arms crossed.
"Yes, indeed. I'm worried I might accidentally kill him if he keeps talking." Jungkook runs a hand through his hair, combing it with his fingers in an attempt to slick it up.
"Well at least when he dies I won't have to search for the killer." She yawns. "The company is really investing itself in this mission. They even let you borrow their car and stay at the apartment they own."
"They clearly have a big budget for them to waste it on useless things." Jungkook sighs. He gets the concept of personal grudge might seem appealing to people but it'll amount to nothing in the end. Once that feeling of hatred towards someone disappears everything begins to be... futile. Satisfaction doesn't last very long, despite of what others think.
"Don't fuck it up." She states. It's not an option to mess up. "If you accept a mission it's your duty to fulfill it no matter what. Failure is not acceptable."
Jungkook scoffs. "Just who do you take me for?"
Faking confidence is easy but the truth is that Jungkook has never had a job interview. He was picked when he was barely a teen and since then killed countless people. He's also never really spoke to anyone outside of their organization, he's not quite certain he has incredible social skills. Well, it's not as if he doesn't know how to speak at all. He doesn't know what to expect from Jimin. Hearing about someone from a person who hates him doesn't exactly count as a reliable source. Stepping into the elevator he made his way, pressing the last button. What a large building. It's weird he began thinking it when he was already inside rather than when he stared at it from outside. Of course it's not his first time in a skyscraper but usually he doesn't go through the entrance considering he's carrying weapons. Standing in front of the office door, he knocks softly. "Come in." A voice commands. Taking a deep breath Jungkook reached for the doorknob. Christ, why is murdering people less stressful than a job interview? He thinks he knows why suicide rates are so high up now. He steps into the spacious room. "Jeon Jungkook, correct?" The man says, offering a polite smile. He receives a nod in return from the young male. "Please take a seat. Tell me a little bit about yourself."
"My name's Jeon Jungkook, I'm twenty. I've graduated from the Wharton university two months ago. I majored in accounting and economics."
"So what you're saying is that you don't have real experience in the field?" Jimin says, intertwining his hands and resting them on the desk.
"Not officially." The gaze is so intense. "Although we had experiments at facilities to get the main idea."
"I see, that's interesting." Jimin leans back against his chair. "And what would you say was your strength during those experiments, and in general?"
The information sheet Sera handed him had those questions, it's good that he was able to prepare in advance. "I get the work done quickly and accurately."
"And what would you say is your greatest weakness?"
So far, so great. "I find communicating beyond work to be troubling so I would never be one to know about projects and plans ahead because I would most likely not speak with other employees. That, however, is something I can change if necessary."
Jimin's smile makes Jungkook all the more nervous. "Alright Jungkook, I'd like to know your personal ideology."
Jungkook had the answers to every possible question on that paper. Sadly, this question was not on the sheet. "Huh?"
"You seem to be intelligent, hard working and willing to improve. Those are very important traits." Jimin flips through Jungkook's resume. "But those are rather shallow things. I'd like to know more about you as a person, I want to know the people I work with because I want to make sure I have the right people here."
"What do you mean by ideology?"
"What is it that guides you?" Jimin questions. "Anything in particular you admire or aspire to do?"
"I think that it's not something I can tell to a person I just met." Jungkook says.
"Fair enough. Then, tell me, what do you think is the most important thing for a person? Not as a worker, but as a human."
"I think..." Jungkook wonders for a second. "It's to know who you really are."
"If there's one thing I learned while growing up is that everyone around you will try to dictate things for you. Who you should love or hate, what you should say or do." Jungkook speaks honestly. "Whether it comes from good intentions or not, it's confusing and you end up forgetting who you originally were. I think that if you know who you are, it's easier to set up your dreams and goals and find a way to achieve them."
There's a moment of silence and Jimin seems to be examining Jungkook's face. "I don't want to dismiss how others have responded to this question but I like your answer best. Consider yourself hired Jungkook."
"You've got the skills and the will to improve. Not to mention I like how you think. You might not be in complete sync with your ideals just yet but you're trying and it's something I appreciate very much." The slightly older male gets up, walking the younger male to the door. He shakes Jungkook's hand. "Welcome to Future Foundation."
"I can't believe you managed to infiltrate the company!" Yugyeom groans, clearly annoyed at how successful Jungkook is. "Hey are you listening to me? How'd you do it? Didja seduce him already?"
"Leave him be." Sera orders, causing the male to pout childishly. "You did it. Was the script I prepared useful?"
"At first." Jungkook finally speaks, stretching in the training room. "Then he asked me what my ideology is. I didn't know how to answer and made something up on spot."
"What did you make up?" Yugyeom asks, curious.
"I'd rather not share anything with you." Jungkook chooses to ignore his continuous pestering. But still, Jimin's not what he expected. He imagined someone boring, stale. Someone who doesn't know better than to steal but his will to work with good people seemed sincere. Then again he could be manipulating his co-workers, hence why no one arrested him yet for the crimes he committed.
"Do you start on Monday?" Sera asks, smashing the punching bag open with her bare hands.
Jungkook hums. "I hope I'll manage to keep the act, I'm itching to kill a criminal already."
"Your desk is right here." Jimin leads him to his designated seat. "Most of the work is done on the computer but occasionally you'd need to take or make phones calls and take care of some paper work."
"Very well." Jungkook sits down, ready to work.
"I'm not your direct manager for this part, that would be Taehyung who is the chief financial officer." Jimin points to a person in a booth slightly larger than Jungkook's, but right next to him.
"Hello, nice to meet you." Taehyung smiles, offering his hand for a friendly hand shake. Jungkook complies, but doesn't return the smile.
"Nice to meet you too."
"Taehyung will give you the work schedule and I wish you best. Good luck." Jimin makes his way back into his office.
"Jimin must have really liked your answer." Taehyung says the moment their boss leaves. "He doesn't usually walk employees to their seats, let alone guides them around. He prefers watching them be independent."
"So you're saying he feels the need to baby me?" Jungkook frowns, somewhat annoyed.
Taehyung laughs. "You certainly took this the wrong way. I meant, I think he likes your personality."
That was quick, Jungkook thinks. "That's odd, I don't remember saying anything impressive." He turns on the computer and gets to work, not wanting to waste more time than necessary speaking with supervisor.
"You don't give yourself enough credit, do you?" Taehyung asks, not looking away from his screen as he typed.
"I've only talked to you for around, what, five minutes? And you've already doubted yourself and those around you twice." Taehyung sighs. "Jimin told me that this is your first time working after graduating but he still chose you for a reason. Take some pride in that."
Jungkook is a bit taken aback at the kind words. He surely didn't expect it. For once the praise sounds sincere and Jungkook feels better about himself. "Thank you for saying that." He finally cracks a small smile. Alright, he decides to put his best efforts into his work. It's surprisingly easy. Then again he was always incredibly smart and good at catching on things fast. He types quickly, doing everything perfectly and quickly, just as he said he will.
"Oh about the schedule," The older male remembers. "You can take a fifteen minutes break whenever you want three times a day. Lunch break is at three and it lasts until it's 3:30. Basically, you have an hour and fifteen minutes where work isn't mandatory."
"That's quite a lot." Jungkook is surprised.
"Well considering we work from eight to seven, which is eleven hours a day, it doesn't feel like you're resting that much." Taehyung chuckles. "By the way, at lunch everyone in our department goes to the restaurant right beneath our floor. Do you want to join us? I think it'll be a good way for you to get to know everyone else."
"I don't know about that..." Jungkook is hesitant. He only needs to get close to Park Jimin, his target, not anyone else. It seems like a nuisance.
"Jimin also said you're not a team player." Taehyung says. "Even if you think it's bothersome, I think it'll be great. Work is better when you get along with those around you."
Jungkook wouldn't know. He never got along with anyone in the assassination organization he practically grew up in. "I would assume."
"Didn't you get along with your classmates?"
Jungkook thinks back to his training where he was almost killed every day and resists the urge to throw up. "That's putting it mildly."
"At least give it a shot, alright? I'm sure it'll be more fun than you think."
Jungkook only nods, resuming his work.
Jimin's office is on this floor so sometimes he'd go out of his room to get coffee. He assumes that as the CEO he has the most work. It's impressive to see he has strong work ethics, even if he's a shitty person. During the fourth time he came out, Jungkook realized it was his chance to talk with him. Deciding to take his first break right now, he made his way to the coffee machine. He greets his boss politely. "How's work going so far?" Jimin asks, adding one spoonful of sugar.
"Pretty decent, I'm done with the third part." He takes a cup and makes himself a hot beverage.
"You're quicker than I expected." Jimin praises, adding another spoon of sugar. And another. And... another.
Jungkook watches as Jimin puts seven spoons of sugar inside his coffee. "Uhhh, I think you have a little coffee in your sugar."
Jimin laughs nervously. "Maybe you have too much coffee in your sugar." He looks as if he's fighting back a yawn. Jungkook couldn't tell before due to the nervousness but Jimin has eye bags. He must stay up late almost constantly. Being the CEO is a hard role that someone has to devote himself to. "But in all seriousness, the mix of caffeine and sugar helps me stay up."
"I see." Jungkook takes a sip from his own drink. "I'm sure it's tough." He tries to strike up a chat.
"Your work isn't easy too." Jimin takes a sip too, looking dissatisfied with the taste but then again, it does seem pretty gross. "I'll return to my work."
"Wait," the younger male softly calls out. It's already been four hours since he started working and he needs to find ways to spend more time with the older male. "During lunch break everyone plans to go the restaurant beneath this floor. Do you think you'll be able to join us?"
"That's a nice offer but there's a lot of things that need to be done so I'm not quite positive I'll have the chance." Jimin declines.
"What if I stay after work hours and help you? That way you might waste some time but you'll get another working hand." Jungkook doesn't want to get ahead of himself but he doesn't want it to take too much time. He knows he won't get many chances to talk with Jimin so he needs to make use of everything he can.
"You must really want me with you guys." Jimin grins slightly.
"After seeing you drinking a cup of coffee with so much sugar in it I can't deny I want to see you eat something healthy." Jungkook makes up an excuse that makes him seem compassionate. In all reality he doesn't care much.
"Sweet of you to pretend to be concerned about your boss but even so, I'll think about it." He makes his way back into the office.
Jungkook clicks his tongue. He knew it won't be easy because he gets paid so much for doing this but honestly, it sucks. He just wants to kill criminals in a matter of seconds and be done. He returns to his chair and continues working. He doesn't even notice lunch break has started until Taehyung shakes his shoulder. "We're going now, are you joining us?"
If Jimin isn't going he doesn't quite see the point but then again, he's hungry. "Yeah." He gets up and follows everyone. He ends up sitting next to Taehyung because he doesn't know anyone else.
"Everyone, this is Jeon Jungkook." The older male introduces him to everyone. "These are Sungyu, Jaekyung, Eunkyung and Yujin." They all wave at him, seemingly friendly.
He was about to greet them back but a familiar voice spoke. "Sorry I'm late." It's Jimin. He sits in the empty seat besides Jungkook and everyone in the table seem shocked.
"Jimin, you never eat with us." Taehyung says. "What changed your mind?"
"I suppose I felt bad about it. Besides, I finished some work earlier than expected so I thought, why not? It won't hurt to eat something that isn't takeout for once." Jimin grabs a menu and ignores everyone's piercing gazes to order something. "You guys don't have to look so appalled. To make it up to you for not being the most involved boss, I'll pay for everything."
Everyone cheered in agreement.
Jungkook was never one to talk much, especially if it wasn't needed, so he sat and listened to everyone's conversations. Of course he focused on Jimin, to find out more details he can exploit. Right now, the topic was their families. "My mother is always so pushy and demanding." Eunkyung groans. "But to be fair that's how I got this far."
"Yeah my dad is the same." Taehyung laughs. "What about you Jungkook? How are your parents like?"
That touched a very sensitive nerve. "My parents passed away when I was very young so I don't remember much about them."
The air is extremely uncomfortable. No one speaks after that and Jungkook feels bad for ruining the mood. Until Jimin comes to his rescue. "My family is so strict that I was forced to be such a rebel when I was younger to get attention from them."
"You? A rebel?" Taehyung questions in mockery. "You're the most diligent person I've ever met."
"You'd be amazed." Jimin drinks his water. "When I was thirteen, I stole my dad's car and drove to another city at around three am with a sleeping homeless in my trunk."
"What?!" Jaekyung looks at him in disbelief.
"Why would you do that?" Yujin asked.
"On my way to school I saw the guy on the floor and he offered me a bottle of vodka. Now mind you I was a minor back then. I did drink but getting my hands on alcohol was almost impossible so naturally I said yes. Then he said we should make a deal. If I help him get where he needs, the bottle is all mine. He probably thought I was older." Jimin giggles at the memory. "I told him to meet me somewhere late at night, when my parents were asleep."
"You were wild back then, damn." Taehyung claps.
When lunch break was over everyone made their way upstairs and Jungkook walked behind everyone, not in the mood to talk. "Hey, Jungkook." Jimin turns to him. "About what you told us," Jimin walks in the same pace now. "I'm sorry to hear that you didn't get to know your family well."
"The truth is, I could never understand that kind of pain." Jimin admits. "But if you ever feel the need to talk to someone, just know I wouldn't mind lending an ear."
Jimin really does seem very nice. Jungkook wonders what his true colors are. "That's more than fine, I don't feel the need to talk about it."
After that depressing lunch, Jungkook focused solely on his work. He hates thinking about his parents because it reminds him of the orphanage. And that brings up many bad memories. Nevertheless he does the best he can and finishes whatever needs to be done. When the clock hits seven most of the coworkers get ready to leave. Jimin wanted to catch the younger male before he left but when he went to his desk, he saw him talking with someone.
"Hey Jungkook, do you want to go to the bar with us? We're getting a drink together." Taehyung invites him again. How considerate.
"No thank you, I don't feel like drinking."
"Come on," Eunkyung urges. "Maybe there will be some pretty girls." He winks.
"I'm not interested in women." Jungkook says when he notices Jimin approaching.
"Huh? How come?" Eunkyung asks a dumb, obvious question.
"Because I like men." Jungkook states, not flinching. That wasn't a lie.
"O-Oh! My bad, haha." He laughs awkwardly and makes way to the exit.
"Jungkook, do you remember saying you'll help me?" Jimin asks, interrupting the embarrassing conversation he was about to have with the rest of them.
"Yes, I was about to head to your office." And so the older male saves Jungkook from the unpleasant discussion. "I'll see you guys tomorrow." He follows Jimin to the office, exhaling in relief.
"I didn't know how serious you were about saying you don't have good social abilities." Jimin laughs, handing Jungkook a file. "Don't worry, I'm not giving you any difficult work."
"I'll do what I can." Jungkook is about to head to his desk outside but Jimin stops him.
"Just sit in front of me. It'll be silly to make you go back and forth to take papers." He leaned back against his chair and started doing what he does best. Work. Jungkook followed his example. Jimin's job was clearly harder than his but it was possible for him anyway. After a long while of silence and typing and writing, Jimin speaks. "I'm going to make coffee, do you want some?"
"I can go and make it for you, if you want." Jungkook suggests. "I know you have a lot to do. And besides, I already know how much sugar you use so I can just, you know, throw the entire box into your cup."
"Alright sassy guy, I get that I have a problem." Jimin smiles, finding Jungkook's words amusing. "You really are a change of pace in here." He says when the younger male returns with two cups.
"Why is that?" Jungkook asks when he makes his way to the table.
"Because you're very honest but mysterious at the same time. Not to mention you had the guts to back talk your boss and offer your help even though it's your first day. You're certainly unique." Jungkook's not sure if it's a compliment or not.
"I think it's due to my lack of communication skills." Jungkook confesses.
"I don't mean to come off as intrusive but why do you find it so hard to speak with others?"
Jungkook thinks back to his conversation with Sera from a few days ago. She explained to him what the most important things are when you're undercover. To gain someone's trust you have to show them something genuine and personal, something so sincere that it's obvious you're not lying about it. That way they'll find it easier to believe in you. So Jungkook speaks honestly. "After my parents died, I sort of caved in within myself. I ended up growing in an orphanage where almost everyone hated me so I suppose I couldn't grasp the idea of becoming close to people." Jungkook may seem nonchalant but the truth is that it hurts to talk about those memories.
"I'm sorry to hear that." And Jimin does, truly, seem sad. Either he's good at faking it or he actually does care. "I know you must have went through a lot in life and when it comes to your past, I know I can't change it. But I think it's amazing you were able to get back up and pursue a future. It's incredible and that's not something that should be taken for granted."
At first Jungkook is at loss for words. No one has ever said that to him. He can't deny he's stunned. Jimin has a way with words. "Thank you for saying that." Jungkook bites his lower lip, trying to reduce his confusion. "By the way, you said you were rebellious to get your parents' attention, how did you end up being the CEO?"
"My parents hated me during those years and at some point I stopped minding the punishments. I thought I stopped caring but one time, when I finally came to school after a while, I aced one of my tests." Jimin combs his hand through his hair. "My dad praised me so much that I suddenly felt such a strange urge to please him. I began working hard after that. It turns out I naturally had a very high IQ and I ended up being the best student in my class. I jumped a few classes as well."
"That explains why you're such a talented CEO at your age." Jungkook is impressed. He knew Jimin must be intelligent and hard working but it seems it was a tough road for him.
"If fifteen years old me saw me right now, he'd call me an old nerd." Jimin simpers.
"If it makes you feel any better, my younger self would have started crying upon seeing me interacting with someone." Jungkook jokes.
"You seem to communicate well when you want." Jimin says.
"I think it depends more on the person I'm talking to rather than myself."
"I wonder, what does that mean about me?" The older male questions.
"That you're easy to talk to." The younger male concedes.
"Really now? Your boss is easy to talk to? Most people disagree with you."
"I don't particularly care if people agree or not. What matters in the end are my thoughts." Jungkook resumes to writing.
Jimin smiles at that, but doesn't say anything, directing his attention to the papers in front of him. Around nine pm, Jimin stretched in his chair. "I think that's it for today."
"Alright." Jungkook yawns into his hand. "This is so tiring and you do it every day. You have my condolences."
"It's not that bad." Jimin says. "But it was more enjoyable with you here. And easier, of course."
"How about we make a deal then?"
"A deal?" Jimin raises an eyebrow in curiosity.
"You come with us to lunch every day and I help you." Jungkook proposes. That way he can monitor his actions more.
"That does sound tempting. I do need the company to prevent me from losing my mind in those papers." Jimin gets up. "Alright then, but don't expect me to pay every time."
"Don't worry, I recently started this new job so I'll get some money soon."
"Damn, I wanted to hire you myself but some other genius was ahead of me." Jimin clicks his fingers. They mindlessly chat in the elevator until each heads to their car. "I'll see you tomorrow."
It went on for three weeks. Jimin joined everyone during lunch and in return, Jungkook stayed with him for a few more hours after his work day was over. The truth is he actually looked forward to spending time with the older male. He felt like he could be himself and Jimin accepted it. Jimin liked his lame jokes, his weird antics and even his strange honesty. Besides that, Jungkook found Jimin to be very funny but also serious and warm. He'd try to make the younger male as comfortable as he could, changing the AC setting for him, making them coffee and being nice in general. He learned a lot about Jimin. He's open about many things, he's learned from past mistakes and improved through many efforts. He definitely made some progress. He learned that Jimin dislikes people who don't work hard and he finds good morals to be one of the main things he deems important. It's weird that despite the fact Park Jimin is his assassination target he almost treats him like a friend. That doesn't change his mind about Jimin being a criminal but it does make talking to him easier. "You and Jimin sure are close." Taehyung says during one of Jungkook's breaks.
"Huh? Are we?"
"You two always sit together at the table, you spend some breaks together and you stay with him after everyone else leave. Not to mention he started taking breaks which, mind you, is something I've never seen him do in my two years here, to spend time with you." He explains. "If you ask me, I think he's closest to you out of everyone here and you've been here for the least amount of time."
"We get along, I guess." Jungkook drinks his coffee to avoid continuing this dialogue.
"Jungkook, Taehyung, good morning." Jimin greets when he leaves the office. "I don't know if you remember but today we have self defense training in the floor above us."
"Don't worry, no one forgot." Taehyung answered him. "Are you here for coffee?"
"I think I'll go for tea this time."
The self defense course was mandatory after one of the past employees was attacked on her way home and was in critical condition. Ever since Jimin decided that once a month they will have a lesson in order to try and avoid more tragic events like this one. Jungkook had zero interest in that, considering he already knew pretty damn well how to fight off people. "Alright, I'll choose two people for a sparring example. Jimin, Jungkook, please come forward."
"What should we do?" Jimin asked.
"Jimin, I want you to pretend you're attacking Jungkook from the front and Jungkook, I want you to do your best to break free." She shows Jimin how to attack, "Now Jungkook, I know this is your first lesson with us but still try. Are you guys ready? Go." Jimin launches at the younger male, grabbing him by the neck, trying his best to not actually hurt Jungkook but the latter's instincts kicked in immediately. He grabbed Jimin's hands, pulled them down and kicked the older male's stomach. At least, he tried to kick him, but Jimin evaded. Instead, the older male broke free from Jungkook's grip and took a step back. "That was some good combat skills you have there." The instructor commends. "How about we try that again but this time Jungkook attacks? Ready, set, go!"
Jungkook charges at Jimin like he was trained in the organization, with the intention to kill. He grabs Jimin by the shoulder and aims a punch at his face. Jimin barely manages to avoid the punch but Jungkook kicks his leg harshly, knocking him down and pinning him to the floor. Everyone around them freeze in astonishment. Jungkook's stare is intense and cold until his eyes meet Jimin's wide ones and he quickly gets up, apologizing and offering a hand to help him up. "Holy crap Jungkook, had no idea you can kick our ass." Taehyung says, applauding.
"That was so cool, where did you learn how to do it?" Jaekyung asks.
"Oh, uh, I took self defense classes before and, uh, I had a natural talent for it." Jungkook finds an excuse. "Jimin, I'm very sorry. My reflexes got the best of me. I didn't mean to harm you."
"That's more than fine, I got to discover a new side to you." Jimin pats Jungkook's shoulder, trying to show that he's not mad. "More than anything I'm amazed. You should teach me how to fight."
Jungkook is relieved they weren't freaked out by him. "Sure, you're pretty amazing yourself. You avoided two of my kicks and punches and not to take pride in being good at beating up people or something, but that's remarkable on its own."
"Do you really want to stay and work until late on Friday?" Taehyung asks as he's about to go home. "Maybe you should cancel on Jimin and come with us to get something to drink. I mean, we don't have work tomorrow so we can drink as much as we'd like!"
"I already promised him I'll help." The others don't know about Jimin and Jungkook's deal, they just assume Jungkook wants to prove himself and get close to the boss and that's why he stays.
"Jungkook, I made us coffee." Jimin says when the younger male walks into his office.
"Oh, thanks." He sits down. "How is your leg?"
"She's fine, thank you for asking."
"I'm glad. Soon enough she'll be back up on her feet." Jungkook thinks for a second. "Or should I say foot?"
"Hey, Jungkook, I have an offer." Jungkook hums, as if asking what is it. "How about today, after we're done with our work, we'll go get something to drink?"
"Just the two of us?"
"Yeah. I mean, I could use the fun and we never meet up after work so I thought it'll be a fantastic way to become friends." Yes! His plan to get closer to the older male is finally working.
"You know what, why not? I can't remember the last time I took a break."
"Well, it was today around five." Jimin says. "But hey, who keeps track?"
"And so we're done with the last paper for today." Jungkook announces, stapling it to a pile of paper sheets.
"I just realized something. We both have cars."
"Oh. You're right." Jungkook checks his phone for the time. "Maybe we can use your car and you'll drop me off at home? I live around ten minutes from here so I can just leave the car in the parking lot for the night."
"But if we both drink then it's not smart to drive." Jimin contemplates. "How about we just take a taxi? I'll leave my car here too."
"Sounds like a plan."
"It's been a while since I went drinking." Jungkook says when he settles on a bar stool next to the older male. "I don't even remember if I'm a lightweight or not."
"I want shots." Jimin says after going through the menu. "What about you?"
"Shots. Go hard or go home, right?"
Jimin frowns. "People use going home to indicate it's a bad thing? They must love their jobs." Jimin takes off his blazer and loosens his tie, unbuttoning his white shirt a little. Jungkook was busy being the assassin he is that he never took much notice as to how good looking Jimin is. The fact he's single baffled Jungkook the more he got to know the older male.
They down their shots rather quickly. Except, Jungkook forgot he's not exactly a pro in handling his drinks. He's not a lightweight but he tends to go overboard whenever he has the chance. While three shots won't get him drunk, only tipsy, he took eight shots. "Boy is it blurry in here or is it just you?" He asks, poking Jimin's face repeatedly.
"Okay, maybe that's enough drinks for today." Jimin finds drunk Jungkook endearing.
"But what if I want water?" Jungkook whines. "Or coke? Or sprite? Then what?"
"You're right, my bad. Enough alcoholic drinks for the day."
"Yaay, I get to drink water!" Jungkook sounds so excited.
"You're pretty cute when you're drunk." Jimin smiles, not minding the constant poking and pinching. He found it funny.
"Hey, hey, hey! I am," Jungkook stops mid sentence to stare at the air and then proceeds speaking. "Always cute."
"Good point." Jimin pets his head to calm him. "How about I call up a cab for you?"
"I didn't know cars have cellphones." Jungkook tilts his head to the side, looking adorable.
"It's a new invention but only cabs have them."
"That's unfair." Jungkook pouts childishly. He's completely different when he's drunk. Jimin calls a taxi. After somehow figuring out Jungkook's mumbling, he finds out the address to his house. "Hey, hyung," He tugs at Jimin's sleeve before the older male can close the car door. "Come with me. I don't think I can walk up the stairs without falling." He speaks slurrily. Jimin surrendered to Jungkook's pleas and got in the cab with him. He put on Jungkook's seatbelt for him and gave him the water bottle he bought when they left the bar. When they arrive at the building, Jimin pays the driver and helps carry Jungkook to the elevator. He ended up walking him to the door because apparently the younger male was worried about not being able to use the key. Jimin opens the apartment for him.
"Now that you're finally home, I can relax." He helps Jungkook walk inside. He places the keys on the table. "Try to get some sleep, alright?"
"W-Wait, hyung," Only drunk Jungkook calls Jimin hyung but to be fair, it's charming.
"What is it this time? You can't walk to your couch on your own or something?" Jimin laughs, not expecting it when the younger male wraps his hands around his neck and kisses him. Ignoring his better judgement for a minute, Jimin complies, kissing him back. Jungkook mewls when he feels Jimin's tongue against his own and that's when Jimin stops. "God, what did I do?"
"You kissed me very well." Jungkook murmurs, nuzzling against Jimin's cheek in his drunken state.
"No, that was wrong of me. You're not sober, you're not thinking clearly and I took advantage of it. I'm so sorry," He removes Jungkook's grip on him. "I should go." He turns to exit but the sound of Jungkook falling startles him.
Everything is black. Jungkook can't see anything, but he can hear mixed voices. All are yelling.
"You're not good enough."
"You should have died."
"Good for nothing."
"Stupid, worthless orphan."
Amidst the curses and the hate, a familiar voice calls out to him. "It's okay, things will get better. I believe in you so you definitely should believe in yourself!"
"Yesung?" Jungkook lifts his head, tears tugging at the corners of his eyes.
"I love you, you know that right?" The image of his childhood friend appears, reaching his hand to hold Jungkook but the moment he takes a step closer, he realizes he stepped through him as if he's a silhouette. Jungkook tries again, but the image grows further and further away. The voice is eerie, losing the warmth it held in the beginning.
"Wait, where are you going?" Jungkook yells, desperately running, trying to follow him. "Yesung! Come back, please." The tears fall down. "Yesung!" Jungkook screams, getting up. When his eyes adjust to the light in the room, he sees his boss. "Jimin? What are you doing here?"
"After I took you back home, you passed out. I freaked out and called an ambulance but when the paramedic came they told me you were just drunk." Jimin hands him a glass with juice. "They told me that you don't have any signs of alcohol poisoning but I should keep watch on you anyway."
"How long was I out?" He asks, gladly taking the drink.
"For around three hours, more or less." Jimin hands him a pill. "This is for your slowly forming headache."
"Fuck, I'm sorry. I made you take care of me because of my bad drinking habits." Jungkook rubs his temples. "Ugh, I don't remember anything."
"I just remember us going into the elevator and after that it's all hazy." Jungkook lies down.
"Well it's okay, nothing much happened." Jimin assures but somehow it sounds peculiar. "Can I ask you something?"
"Yeah, what is it?"
"Who's Yesung?" Jungkook's eyes widen and Jimin can tell he can't grasp the situation. "It's just, while you were asleep you mumbled this name a lot until at some point you started shouting, reaching your hand forward as if you were trying to catch something. It made me crazy with worry but then you woke up."
"He is... a friend from the orphanage."
"I see, I'm glad." Jimin gets up. "That you have a friend, that is."
"I'd like to go to sleep."
"Oh, you definitely need to, right." Jimin gets up from the chair he took from the kitchen. "I'll return it and leave."
"See you on Monday." Jungkook covers up with the blanket and Jimin gets out. He's not going to lie, when he discovered Jimin took care of him his heart beat raced. It was so sweet of him to do it. In fact, he kind of took care of him the entire night. He doesn't want to sound doubtful but is Jimin really a bad person? Well if the agency labeled him, there's a reason to it. It's not that rare that sociopaths are good at faking their feelings so maybe that's the case. After sleeping a little he wakes up, feeling drastically better. He gets up, showers and pours some milk into his cereal. When he was chewing, he suddenly remembered, "I fucking kissed him."
Chapter 2: Sex, Fire, Sick And Tired of Acting All Tough
The aftermath of realizing you drunk kissed your boss can sometimes be cute
a more fluffy chapter than I had intended
This chapter seems shorter but the truth is the first chapter was a mix of two parts
I'm sorry ahead for grammar mistakes but hope you'll enjoy this story anyway
Comments are very much appreciated
Jungkook doesn't know the exact words to describe how he's feeling but internal panic attack would be the closest option. He messed up. He got close, so close only to get drunk, lower his guard and do something to Jimin before the right timing. It's true that people say romance doesn't quite have a fitting moment as it happens naturally, most of the time. However, he was on a mission. The idea was to get the older male to fall for him. That plan isn't necessarily ruined because of the kiss but rather, it's now pushed back. Jungkook manages to finish his breakfast and rubs his temples, taking deep breaths. He hasn't failed yet. He wasn't supposed to make the first move, that action should have been done by Jimin, who should have wanted Jungkook so much that he couldn't resist him. That idea was somewhat far fetched but maybe, with a little more effort and time, that might have happened. He has no choice but to call Sera for instructions. As far as killing goes, Jungkook knows what to do. But it's more complex when there are emotions involved. Making his way to the fancy bedroom he currently stays at, he grabs his phone and makes a quick call to his real boss. "Hey, I didn't think you'd actually call. You're so independent. Well, most of the times." Jungkook resists the urge to groan at her words and waits for her to finish speaking. "What's wrong? You need advice on seducing Jimin?"
"No, that's not precisely my problem." He watches his wording, trying not to sound as desperate as he feels.
"Then what is it?" Sera's confused.
"Let's say I got close to Jimin," He starts off nicely.
"And I went drinking with him yesterday, just the two of us." She whistles. "And, hypothetically, I got too drunk to function."
Sera laughs. "Now that's a sight everyone wants to see."
Jungkook clears his throat. "Anyway, all in theory, say he took me home."
"A gentleman, is he not?"
"Yes, very gentlemanly of him. And, maybe, I drunkenly kissed him." Jungkook says in the same tone, and for a second there, Sera is quiet.
"You did what?" Jungkook could almost imagine her wide eyed expression.
"I kissed him."
"And? Don't leave me in suspense here! Did anything happen?" She pesters when he doesn't say more. "Did he reject you?"
"Not per se."
"What? You're being unclear."
"Well, he kissed me back." Jungkook feels flustered when he remembers it. "With tongue."
"So did you sleep together after that?"
"No, he, uh, said kissing me when I wasn't sober was taking advantage of the fact that I was drunk and he ended up apologizing before leaving." Jungkook settles on the bed, leaving out the part where he passed out and Jimin took care of him. There are some things that are better off staying as secrets. He was expecting to get yelled at or at the very least scolded but there was only silence. Somehow this was more disconcerting. The anticipation for the worst was his redemption because Sera finally spoke.
"That's it?" She asks, baffled the young male had called because of this.
"What do you mean 'that's it'? I messed up! He was supposed to come to me first. I ruined our plan." Jungkook almost pouts.
"Jungkook, ruining our plans would be something like making him hate you, exposing your true identity or killing him ahead of time. This is nothing." She says, comforting him, in her odd way.
"So I can still finish the mission?" Jungkook questions.
"Of course, although it might be a little awkward between you two. I'm not sure I know how to overcome this barrier." She sighs deeply, seemingly thinking.
"I was pretty drunk, I can act like I don't remember." Jungkook suggests, basing it on real life events.
"That's a good idea." She sounded more relieved upon hearing it. "This can almost confirm he likes you."
"Really?" Jungkook is surprised at how happy he appeared to be. He convinces himself that it's because he's closer to executing the mission.
"An effective way to examine this would be the jealousy test." She yawns into the phone. "But we might need Yugyeom for this."
"Why?" Jungkook can't hide his dissatisfaction. "What do you have in mind?"
"I'll tell you soon enough but go and meet him near the mall." She orders and Jungkook is extremely worried.
"Are you certain this is a smart idea?" Jungkook asks, for the tenth time, on their way back to Jungkook's borrowed apartment.
"I'm not one to argue with Sera." Yugyeom says, carrying the shopping bags as a way to express his thanks to their boss for helping him embarrass his rival.
"What if he doesn't go to that bar today?" Jungkook knows Jimin has a schedule he follows almost every day but considering the circumstances for yesterday were caused by alcohol, the older male might want to refrain from it.
"You almost seem... uneasy. I never imagined you have a humane side to you." Yugyeom grins. It annoys Jungkook who tries his best not to take his eye out with the plastic spoon he's using to eat the ice cream they bought.
"I just want to get this over with. Killing criminals shouldn't take that long. One bullet and it's done. I just don't get it. Revenge is meaningless. In the end, they'll lose the high of when Jimin is disposed of." Jungkook takes the key out of his pocket, opening the door for him and his temporary partner.
"The true words of a cold blooded killer." Yugyeom throws the bags on the floor, lying across the sofa. "Sweet place."
"Don't get too comfortable." Jungkook throws his empty ice cream cup at him.
"What was that for?"
"Throw that in the trash along with yourself as you leave." Jungkook coldly says. "I'll only see you when I have to."
"Either Jimin is a total masochist or you're great at acting." Yugyeom retorts, but still does as Jungkook asked him to and throws the cup into the bin.
"It's not it, I simply don't hate him so it's easier for me to get along with him." Jungkook explains, although this logic doesn't make sense in Yugyeom's opinion.
"Oh? Have you fallen for him as well?" Yugyeom teases.
"Don't be ridiculous." Jungkook begins stretching. "I'm neutral about him. It's true he committed crimes and for that I don't like him but he's easy to get along with, unlike a certain someone."
"This is why no one likes you." Yugyeom pinches his nose. "Whatever, at least I get to be mean to you during our undercover errand."
Almost every Saturday, around midnight, Jimin goes to a bar not too far from his home by himself to get some free time and clear his head. He likes the music they play and usually, no one he knows goes there because his employees live far from here. It's not a popular place to begin with, with the old fashioned interior design and flickering neon sign at the entrance. Nevertheless Jimin liked it. No one bothered him there. Drinking home by himself made him feel like a lonely alcoholic but when he's at the bar, the bartender keeps an eye on him and strikes up a chatter occasionally, which helps Jimin with his sudden immense waves of loneliness. He's constantly stressed and working to the bone. Whenever he's out of the office he wants to make the most of it. Today is, apparently, not any different. Yes, he is perturbed over what happened with his youngest employee yet, Jeon Jungkook. That kiss shouldn't have happened, even if it felt good. In spite of that, Jimin thought the best way to ignore the feeling of guilt because he didn't reveal that to the younger male, is not to be stuck at home by himself where his thoughts haunt him. Today's music pick is 80's hits and Jimin quietly jams to them, drinking whisky. A person walks in. It's not a face he recognizes. That doesn't happen a lot. Most of the people who come in are usually the same customers who are there for the same reason as him. To drink in peace. The young man keeps staring at his phone, almost anxiously. Jimin wonders if he's waiting for someone. He keeps his eyes on the door and words cannot describe the comical expression on his face when none other than Jeon Jungkook, the person who had occupied his mind way too often lately, walked in. It's not only the fact he walked in, it's how he was dressed as well. Leather pants, a leather jacket with a crimson colored skin tight shirt and for the finishing touch, a black choker. Jimin always thought it's fascinating to see his co-workers in their casual attire compared to their work clothing but he never imagined Jungkook, of all people, would be so daring. It was outrageous and, well, hot. Keeping his eyes on the younger male, he watched as he made his way to the unfamiliar man from before, taking a seat right in front of him. "Sorry I'm late, it took me a while to choose the perfect outfit."
From where he's sitting, Jimin can hear them, loud and clear, even with the blasting music. "It's not a problem, I know you wanted to look sexy for this."
Jimin almost freezes in his seat. Jungkook had spoken about many things but never about his personal life. He did reveal he was interested in men so it's more than possible that the man in front of him is his boyfriend. If so, he made Jungkook cheat on him. Luckily, the younger male's answer calmed him down. "I don't meet people from dating apps all that often so I wanted to... I don't know, look pretty." In Jimin's eyes, that plan definitely succeeded.
"Don't worry." Taking Jungkook's chin in between his thumb and index finger, the man leans closer, clearly aiming for a kiss. "I think you're more than pretty."
Jimin bites his lower lip in annoyance and crosses his arms. He was contemplating whether or not he should leave. That's when he heard Jungkook's voice shaking a little. "Um, you're kind of moving too fast."
"Huh?" The man suddenly sounded more aggressive. "What're you saying?"
"I'm saying that we've only just met, we barely talked for a few minutes. What makes you think you can just go and kiss me? I only know your name." For some reason, hearing Jungkook say that made Jimin relaxed.
But Jimin gets worried when he hears the man laughing. "You think you're too good for me or something?"
"It's nothing like that, I thought we would talk for a little while before moving forward."
"You thought that a guy you met through an online app after midnight in a bar is here to talk to you?" The guy frowns.
"You know what? This isn't going to work." Jungkook gets up, almost making his way to the door when that guy grabs him. "Let go of me." Jungkook warns, but even he can't respond in time. The guy leaned in, kissing him roughly and holding onto his body, not softening his grip. Instinctively, Jungkook shut his eyes tightly. He has to endure this kiss, the sickening taste of Yugyeom's lips on his own, the horrid feeling of Yugyeom's hand groping his ass, but he can't push him away. They're putting on a show for Jimin. It's working. The older male quickly rushes to his rescue, grabbing Yugyeom by the arm, pulling him away from the younger male. Even Yugyeom is impressed by Jimin's strength. Of course he's letting him win for the sake of the mission. "Jimin?" Jungkook pretends to be shocked.
"I think he told you to let go." Jimin says and Jungkook swears he never thought the older male could look this mad. The angry stare was intense and aimed at Yugyeom, who felt threatened.
"Whatever, he's not worth it." He shook Jimin off and stormed out.
"Are you okay?" Jimin asks, not moving in too close in fear it might startle Jungkook.
"Y-Yeah, more than anything, I'm sorry you had to see this." Jungkook covers his face. "I should have been able to push him away by myself, I'm strong enough..."
"Hey, it's okay, you were in a state of shock and became overwhelmed. It happens."
"Thanks for being understanding." Jungkook cracks a smile. "What are you doing here?"
"I came here to have a drink since it's not that far from my apartment." Jimin says, pointing to his seat, where a glass was placed on the bar.
"Is it alright if I join you?" Jungkook asks timidly.
"Are you sure you don't want to go home and rest instead?"
"I... don't want to be alone." He manages to mutter.
"You're free to join me, come on." The older male leads them to the stools and they sit next to each other. "How's your hangover?"
"Pretty much gone." Jungkook giggles and Jimin thinks it's such a soft way for him to express his amusement. "Although I doubt I'll order anything alcoholic again."
"Have you met your quota for the week?"
"More like for the month," Jungkook goes through the menu and orders ginger ale. "Again, I'm sorry for having you take care of me."
"It was not a problem at all, rather, it was exciting to see a new side to you." Jimin finishes his whisky. "Today, too, I learned that the ever serious Jeon Jungkook goes on dating apps."
"It was a one time thing." Jungkook blushes. "And it was a terrible experience. It's not my cup of tea to meet someone one time and then sleep with them."
"Guess you'll have to go for the old fashioned way of meeting people in real life and speaking to them."
"Face to face."
"No!" Jungkook opposes loudly.
"C'mon, it's not that terrible." Jimin tries to help. "You get along with everyone at work, don't you? They all think you're a great person."
"But I don't like any of them." Jungkook states. "I mean, I like them as co-workers and they're nice people but I'm not interested in them."
"I guess it can't be helped, we don't decide who we end up liking." Jimin orders more whisky. "But I'm surprised though."
"I didn't think you were the type to seek out romance, especially not online. You've made your communication problem very clear to everyone so I thought you wouldn't be that much into the idea of love. Or lust." Jimin wasn't far off.
"That's what I thought as well." Jungkook admits. "But lately I feel as if I'm missing something. I don't feel happy. I thought that maybe, I needed some human warmth in my life."
Jimin laughs, "Human warmth is such a strange way to put it."
"Don't laugh at me."
"I'm laughing because of you, not at you." Jimin smiles. "It's because you're so innocent that it's funny."
"Innocent?" Bewilderment is evident on the younger male's face. "That's the first I've heard someone call me innocent."
"I know you've been through a lot but maybe that's why you know so little." Jimin checks out Jungkook's face. "Have you ever loved anyone?"
"That's a pretty personal question."
"You don't have to answer if you don't want to."
"I have." Jungkook answers. "At least I think so. I had someone very dear to me and I was willing to do everything for him."
"And what happened with him?" Jimin is curious.
"He died." Jungkook bitterly replies.
"Oh." This took a darker turn than Jimin had in mind. "Was it Yesung?"
"I can do one plus one, Jungkook." Jimin's a lot more bold and straightforward than usual. He must still feel agitated over the incident with Yugyeom.
"Yes, it's him." He reveals. "He was... very important to me. And I know I was someone he loved. I don't think I'll ever cherish anyone else this much, nor do I think anyone will love me like he did."
"It's sad to hear that you've lost someone that precious." Jimin shows his sympathy. "But what's sadder in my opinion is that you're stuck in the past."
"What?" Jungkook is getting heated.
"While I don't think you should go ahead and erase him from your memory, because that's obviously not going to happen, I do think you have to accept it." Jimin claims. "Limiting yourself to your past alone won't do you any good, you won't mature. If you keep thinking you'll never love anyone, you never will. If you think no one will love you, you're preventing yourself from finding someone who will cherish you. That's the only thing stopping you from going forward as a person."
"How much do you know about losing someone you love?" Jungkook almost mocks.
"More than I'd like." Jimin sips his drink. "But that's not my point. I could never understand how you feel because I'm not you. I can't tell you to not feel sad or to not be afraid like it's that easy. What I can do is offer my friendship and support to help you. I care about you and your growth as a person. There's nothing I want more than to see you moving on and finding new things and new people who make you happy." Jungkook is hushed, cheeks red as tears tug at his eyes. Such simple words, such kind words, such honest words, no pity behind them, no hidden malice. The fact those words are backed up by Jimin's constant care and attention make this more believable. Despite his best efforts, Jungkook starts crying. Jimin almost drops his glass in shock, "I'm so sorry, did I offend you?" The older male is more apprehensive when Jungkook hugs him, crying into his chest.
"N-No, not at all." Jungkook can't believe it. He can't believe he's crying. He thought he got rid of useless emotions like sadness. Pathetic. And in front of Jimin, in front of his target, of all people. And over what? Over sympathetic words he secretly always wanted to be told?
"Then why are you crying?" Jimin asks in confusion, patting Jungkook's back in an attempt to console him.
"Because," Jungkook lifts up his face, looking at the older male with a bashful expression, "You know exactly what to say to make me feel worked up."
Jimin pets his hair. "I didn't want to make you worked up, I only wanted to cheer you up with positivity."
"Yeah? How's that going for you?" Jungkook asks, sniffling, face back into hiding in Jimin's chest. It's not comfortable but it hides the shame.
"Not that bad I'd say. Could be worse." He could feel Jungkook chuckling. "But you know, there's a bright side to this."
"What is it? Please enlighten me."
"You're cute when you cry."
Chapter 3: Scared I'll Get Caught So I Hide in Plain Sight
Jungkook's past versus his possible future
whew hope you like it
sorry ahead for grammar mistakes but comments are very much appreciated
"Are you feeling better after letting it out?" Jimin asks, rubbing Jungkook's back in circles, the touch soothing the younger male's anxious heart.
"No." Jungkook sniffles. He's not crying anymore but he's too flustered to sit up and reveal his puffy eyes, running nose and his sad face, in general.
"Alright." Jimin has to stifle his chuckle because he knows Jungkook is embarrassed but he decides to let him be. That seems to work best with him. When the older male stops petting Jungkook, the latter freezes in his hold, opposed to the shaking and light wheezing. "Is something the matter?"
Jungkook simply shakes his head but Jimin feels as if something off. "The kid wants you to keep petting him, Jimin." The bartender says, cleaning a cup. "I thought it was pretty obvious considering he literally fell apart in your arms." That's right, they were inside a bar. Jungkook hates the fact there are other people here who can watch him have his first breakdown in five years. It's humiliating enough that Jimin had to witness him disintegrating. The dams in his eyes have been opened and now he can't stop, no matter how hard he's trying to will himself. He hates it, he feels like a baby. The last time he let loose of his emotions like that was justified with the fact he was considered a child but this has no excuse. Nevertheless Jimin resumes his encouraging touch, trying his best to make him relax. "So how come you're with someone today? You're always alone."
"I ended up running into my friend here." Jimin explains, moving his hand to stroke Jungkook's hair. Almost as if he's pampering a puppy. Or a kitty, since Jungkook does remind him of a cat with his slight antisocial behavior.
"A friend, huh?" The guy raises his eyebrow at them, skeptical at the nature of their relationship but not commenting further more about the situation.
The two continue chatting mindlessly but Jungkook only nuzzled more against Jimin's chest, refusing to lift his head when this man he doesn't know is here and can see his weeping face. He doesn't want any more disgrace after hugging the boss and crying all over his shirt. On the bright side, he's sure he left quite the impression after sobbing his soul out. Jimin seemed extremely shocked and worried. He also called him cute, which made the younger male shy for some reason. Everyone likes to be complimented for their looks, especially if they're self conscious. Listening to Jimin's heart, he realizes it's beating rather fast. The sudden rush of blood to his chest must have been when he saw the younger male burst into tears after knowing him as a composed person. The banter goes on for a while and many thoughts cross Jungkook's mind as he reaches a conclusion. Jimin's touch is very gentle and the younger male is surprised at how softly he tugs at his hair. More so surprised at himself after he catches himself sighing in content due to this pleasant sensation. When the comfortable silence is back, Jungkook gathers very much needed courage to get up. He covers his face, coughing a little bit. "Are you feeling okay?" Jimin sweetly asks, voice laced with care. As if he's ready to do anything for Jungkook to be fine.
"Yeah, yeah I'm good." Jungkook searches for the napkins on the table with his hand, blindly touching anything he can until he grabs the tissues. "I'm going to the restroom." Jimin nods and luckily the bathroom is empty. Looking at himself in the mirror, he grumbles in annoyance. Grief is not a befitting look for him. He hears another person walking and quickly washes his face, trying to look normal. Deeming himself closest to recovered, he makes hast to his seat, only to bid his goodbye.
"Are you sure you don't want to stay a little more?" The bartender asks, getting involved in their conversation. "I'd feel bad sending Jimin's friend home when he feels down."
Despite his anger, Jungkook declines politely, trying hard to stop his eye from twitching in annoyance. It's not that he doesn't appreciate the kindness, he just can't stand being in the center of the attention after acting as if everything's wrong. "If you'll need anything, call me."
"Oh, uh, I only have your office number." Jungkook says.
"Huh, you're right." Jimin reaches his hand, asking for Jungkook's phone. "There, now you have my personal number as well."
"Just so you know, unlike my office, I'm free for you 24/7." Jimin smiles, his warm aura making the younger male feel secure.
"Alright, I'll keep it in mind." Jungkook waves, walking to the door and rushing to his car before he can change his mind about leaving. When he's about to enter his vehicle, he hears someone clapping and diverts his attention to the source of this noise.
"Impressive as always, Jungkook." Yugyeom walks up to him, getting inside the car with him sooner than the male can drive away, ignoring Jungkook's groan of protest. "Leaving early after you made him worry about you. Truly, a classic move. Now his mind will be full of you for the entire night."
"With you in the car I'm not afraid to get into an accident." Jungkook coldly says.
"Scary," Yugyeom laughs. "But after seeing you ball your eyes out, I'm not that sca-" He can't finish his sentence before Jungkook holds a knife to his throat, glaring.
"Shut your mouth before I cut your tongue."
And in spite of his visible tensed up muscles and petrified expression on his face, he manages to grin. "That malicious look fits you so much better. Don't go soft on me Jungkook. That way, when I crush you, I won't feel like I've really won."
In the end Yugyeom had Jungkook drive him to the headquarters. He didn't want to, but apparently it was an order from Sera. When Jungkook arrived to his temporary home, he fell on the bed, exhausted. His assassination colleague made this terrible day that much worse, but he wasn't wrong. He can't lose his edge over that. It's best if everyone thinks he was faking sorrow in order to deceive Jimin. No one in the organization, besides the highest officials, know Jungkook's story. Nor does Jungkook knows what sort of life the others had led until the moment they've become assassins. None of it matters. It's part of their past. A past is a privilege killers don't have. Not a single person in their organization has a future to look forward to. They're pawns. Following orders and killing people. It's the only thing he can do. Nothing else. No strings attached to past friends, lovers, family members if some of them had any, no one is allowed to be close to you. They aren't close to each other either, learning the hard way that it's a weight pulling you down. You learn that during your first days in training.
Everyone has to sleep on the dirty, bloody and vomit covered floor. The fear, worry, anxiety, it's plain to see on their faces. But even amidst the chaos and destruction, you find yourself talking to those unlucky people, using it as a form of comfort. Soon enough everybody learned that it's not smart. You're handed a knife, put in groups and are forced to defend yourselves when one professional is focused on killing you. There was a time limit of fifteen minutes, naturally to prevent from them murdering every possible candidate. There were more rules limiting them. For example, unlike the students, the pros weren't handed a weapon. However, if they overpowered a person and took their knife, they were allowed to use it. At first Jungkook thought this was an excercise to make them work as a team but soon enough he realized that in this kind of situation, the only person you can bother protecting is yourself. Seeing someone being viciously stabbed until the light of life escapes their eyes make you realize that when you get killed, you die. This phrase might seem ridiculous and obvious to every person alive, but it gets a different meaning when you're on the verge of dying almost every day. Eventually you grow used to it, to seeing people cry, beg and die. It was so easy to take away the ones who weren't strong or clever enough to protect themselves. At first Jungkook did the same as them, cried. But after countless months of harsh training, avoiding fetal blows and hiding, he figured out there's a method to this madness. If he wanted to survive, he had to face this reality, to look death in the eyes and move. Staying still would get him killed in a matter of seconds. He kept running and running, in the middle of the slaughter house, evading everything thrown at him, his vision as clear as day, watching his steps so that he won't slip up because of the bloody ground. He became numb to all the horror. He stopped wondering what his life would have been like if he stayed in the orphanage and Yesung went instead. He accepted reality sooner than later and that's what pushed him towards being the top assassin he is. He welcomed his unfortunate fate and triumphed over a dead bodies mountain, no longer looking back. That's how he lived his first year there.
Jungkook sighs. Memories sure are unpleasant and impossible to control. He doesn't want to think about it and yet he can't stop reminiscing. It seems the world was in his favor because his phone began ringing, distracting him from the destructive thoughts. "Hello?" He answered without opening his eyes and checking who it was.
"Jungkook, hey." Jimin's voice is soft.
"Ah, Jimin." Jungkook unconsciously sat up. "Why did you call?"
"No particular reason, I was worried about you." Jimin admits. "I couldn't stop thinking about you being sad and, well, I called to see how you're doing."
Such a poor excuse. Jungkook doesn't mind though. Maybe that's what he needs to stop his brain from hurting. "That's nice of you, as always. You really are... such a nice guy."
"Ah, no, you're just... my employee so I had to check if you're okay."
"I am." Jungkook yawns.
"Okay, that's all I needed to know then. Sorry for the late hour, guess I'll let you head to bed." For once, the older male is the one being awkward.
"I'm already in bed." Jungkook smiles gently. "But we've been talking about me an awful lot lately. How are you doing?"
"I'm-I'm good." Jimin stutters. He wasn't expecting the younger male to try and continue this conversation. "Sorry for the odd reply, I... didn't think you'd actually ask me about myself."
"It's more than fine." Jungkook rests his head on the pillow. staring at the ceiling. "I didn't come across as very empathic during our meetings, I suppose I understand why you'd think I don't care."
"No, I didn't say that." Jimin exhales. "It's more so the fact that you can't express yourself very well unless something serious is happening. Today would be a good example of it. That's why I was so surprised, I wondered if something happened."
Jungkook is impressed Jimin figured it out so quickly. With that being said, he is a very successful CEO. He probably knows how to read people well. "Ever the detective when it comes to feelings, aren't you?"
"Are you sure you're okay?"
"I try to be." Jungkook concedes.
"Hmm, I knew you were hiding it from me." Jimin laughs, though he's happy the younger male told him.
"At least I admit to my own faults. You never tell me when you're struggling." Jungkook bites his lower lip. "You try to do everything alone. Sometimes you forget you have employees."
"Are you scolding me?" The older male asks, resisting the urge to coo at him. "But alright, for your sake too, I'll try to share my burden with others."
"It's not like I'm forcing you to." Jungkook almost sulks.
"What, you scold me to and then retort to saying you aren't forcing me?" Jimin asks, amused. "But Jungkook."
"What is it?"
"You seem to be forgetting something important." Jimin's tone is mellow. "You don't have to do everything on your own anymore, too. Everyone here, at the Future Foundation, are your friends. So... don't force yourself to be lonely, okay?"
Jungkook dumbly nods until he remembers Jimin can't see him. He murmurs. "I'll be sure to keep your advice in mind." Sometimes he wonders how the older male can tell him something he needs to hear when he isn't even aware to the fact Jungkook wants to hear it.
"I suddenly recall you told me you love music." Jimin states out of nowhere.
Jungkook furrows his eyes in confusion. "Yes, what of it?"
"I don't know how much of a classical music fan you are, but tomorrow there's a piano recital. A Debussy tribute." He can hear Jimin taking a deep breath. "Do you want to go, with me, tomorrow?"
"Sure." He answers without hesitation. "Out of many composers, he is my favorite."
"Great! The show starts at around eight pm and lasts for around two hours." Jimin sounds relieved. Jungkook wonders if the older male thought he'll reject the offer. "I'll send you the link with information about the event. Do you want me to pick you up from home?"
"That'll be very convenient." Jungkook can't help the smile that forms, trying to will it away unsuccessfully. "It's getting late, isn't it?"
"Is that my cue to hang up?" Jimin questions.
"Your words, not mine." Jungkook doesn't deny. "I'm looking forward to that recital. I've never been to one before."
"I have a lot on my shoulders to make sure you'll enjoy it." Jimin sounded tired. "Goodnight then."
"Goodnight, sleep well." Jungkook was first to hang up. At the very least he has one thing to look forward to on this unnecessarily complicated day.
Jungkook brushes his teeth, washes his face, eats, showers. Does anything he can for time to pass by faster. A date. Kind of. He can make a move to get closer to his target. He let Sera know he made some progress. The attire is somewhat extravagant, he had to go shopping again. Thankfully, Yugyeom didn't tag along. He feels restless. Spending a night next to the older male, listening to beautiful music. He wonders what Jimin is doing at the moment. Exercising, talking with friends, eating. Who knows. When the sun sets and it darkens outside, Jungkook spasms in anticipation. The moment his phone beeps, he reads the message that was sent to him. It's Jimin, saying he'll be here in half an hour. The younger male dresses up, tries to calm his racing heart. In all honesty, he never had any experiences with seducing missions, especially long termed ones. He constantly feels like he's going to mess up. But that distress fades away the moment he makes way to Jimin's car. "Don't you look fancy." Jimin whistles.
"You don't look too shabby yourself."
"Is that your idea of a compliment?" Jimin laughs and begins driving.
"Do you want me to tell you that you look handsome?" Jungkook asks and Jimin would have laughed again unless saw how serious he looked.
"Compliments lose their purpose when you ask that kind of thing." Jimin sighs, albeit finding him lovable. "I'm glad you like classical music, I thought I'll end up going by myself."
"Why did you have two tickets to begin with?"
"One of the people from another, supporting company gave them to me when I mentioned I like the genre." Jimin doesn't take his eyes off the road. "He said someone as admirable as me must have a significant other I can take with me, that's why have gave me two. I tried telling I'm single but he didn't believe me."
Jungkook hums. "You could've given them to someone else."
"I thought about it. Then I thought to myself 'it's a gift' and it'll be rude to give away something someone gave you with good intentions." The ride was rather short and he parked near the venue. He opened the door for Jungkook.
"What a typical gentleman." Jungkook teases.
"Most people say thank you." Jungkook almost stops in his tracks. Yesung used to say it a lot, whenever Jungkook would mess around with him.
"Yeah... Thank you." Jungkook watches everyone in the hall walking together. He is reminded of his best friend and out of pure intent, he links his arm with Jimin's.
Needless to say the older male was startled. "Jungkook?"
"I don't like crowds." Jungkook declares. "They make me nervous."
"Don't worry, the piano will put you in ease." Jimin doesn't make a move to break free, figuring he must need some sort of encouragement. They take their seats, Jungkook still holding tightly onto the older male, even when he realizes he should let go. He can't shake off the uneasiness. On the website it said many talented pianists will perform, each will play a few pieces. The embarrassment, the dismay, the tension, it all disappears the second one person began playing the piano. It immediately soothed him and he found himself closing his eyes, ignoring his other senses to focus on his ears as his grip on Jimin's hand loosened. While Jungkook was completely absorbed in the music, the older male could barely tear off his gaze from him. He appeared peaceful for once. A small, almost invisible smile had shown itself. Jungkook bobbed his head without noticing, humming along to the familiar tunes he adored. He didn't check the list of the songs they'd perform. That's why when his favorite piece started playing, he snapped his eyes open, staring at the person playing. Clair de Lune. There was a painful sting in his heart during this one. He examined the pianist. She seemed nervous, eyes shifting and breathing ragged. In the middle of the song she stopped playing, disrupting Jungkook's slowly building composure, and passed out. Needless to say everyone in the crowd freaked out. Everyone except Jimin, who ran up to the stage, checking her pulse and breathing. He didn't dither, didn't need to think this through before he began performing CPR. She came to it. An ambulance was called regardless. Jimin made his way back to Jungkook after the staff announced a ten minutes break for everyone to calm down after the incident. They stepped outside for fresh air. "I hope she's okay."
Jungkook nods. "I'm sure it was nerve wrecking for her, she seemed agitated from the very beginning."
"That aside, you looked really into the music." Jimin rests his hand on the railing. "Especially that last one. You must like this one best."
"I do." Jungkook didn't look serene. "I love it. It starts slowly. It's soothing; yet exciting. Not many songs can take me on an emotional rollercoaster. To make you sad but happy. I like the gentle halt at the end, although we didn't get to hear it."
"Do you play the piano?"
"I used to, before my parents died. That was very long ago." The night breeze blows. "Yesung used to play that song all the time."
Jimin can't miss the sadness seeping into the younger male's eyes. "Yeah? Was he good?"
"Not really." Jungkook laughs. "He'd mess up a lot. But he liked that song most. He told me to keep listening to it so I'll know whenever he misses a note."
Jimin beams. "So you had a piano in the orphanage?"
"Yeah. It was a pretty old piano but it was all we had. At the time it was a lot more than I could have asked for." Jungkook stared at the dark horizon. "But you know, even though I loved the music, what I cherished more than the music Yesung played on it was Yesung himself. Whenever he'd make a mistake, he wouldn't get frustrated, he wouldn't get upset. He'd... laugh it off and tell me that soon enough he'll be able to play it perfectly for me. For me, you know? He was playing because he thought it'll make me happy."
"He sounds like a good guy." The older male pat his back, like he did at the bar.
"He really was." Jungkook turns to Jimin. "You remind me of him, a little."
"I hope you don't get me wrong, I know you're your own person, I never saw you as him, but I saw parts of him in you." Jungkook holds Jimin's hand. "You're both so nice, kind, caring and I just... I know these traits aren't rare or anything but there's something about you."
"Jungkook, it's not that I doubt you'd know Yesung better than me but maybe it's not that we remind you of each other, rather, you think I'm similar to him because finally, after a long time, you were able to be yourself next to someone else." Jimin tightens his hold on him. "And in no way do I think I can replace him or be the 'new' Yesung for you, but I do think we can share a deep bond. You are being yourself and I'm being myself. Despite our big difference, we're pretty compatible. I'm happy you can talk about him but don't forget - as much as you care about someone, he's part of your life, not part of you. That's why there are things best left behind. The fact you are acknowledging him and his importance to someone new in your life is the very first step and I'm proud of you for taking it."
Jungkook wanted to say something but the announcement stopped him. "The piano recital is resuming. We ask the guests to reclaim their seats. We'll continue from the last, unfinished piece."
"They're going to play Clair de Lune again," Jimin grins and leads Jungkook by the hand. "Let's go?"
Jungkook feels his cheek blazing, heartbeat racing as he tried to suppress his excitement. "Let's."
Chapter 4: Drunk With You, Drunk With This Night
Jimin figures out he likes Jungkook but Jungkook is too drunk to realize
whew I update this one rather fast cause I like writing it best
a little more steamy, kinda?
sorry ahead for grammar mistakes but hope you'll like it nevertheless!
comments are very much apppreciated <3
"So tell me, how was your first experience with a piano recital?" Jimin asks as soon as they leave their seats, the cold wind blowing at the evening.
"It was beautiful." Jungkook says. "Thank you for taking me, you really do a lot to help me."
"Nonsense, you're my employee and friend, it's pretty common for your boss to treat you sometimes." Together, they make their way to the older male's car. "It's not like anyone else wanted to join me anyway."
"I was a last option, then?" Jungkook wonders.
"Oh, no, I didn't mean it that way." Jimin becomes noticeably flustered. A pretty rare sight. "I just... don't know you for a very long time, we don't have regular and established work ethics between us and I don't know your tastes in music all that well so I was thinking that maybe you wouldn't want to go. I had no idea if you'd find it boring or not." He unlocks the vehicle, opening the door for Jungkook before starting the car.
"I always believe that with the right person, nothing is boring." Jungkook leans against the chair, closing his eyes after putting on the seatbelt.
"I'm glad that's the mindset you have." Jimin smiles. "Not many people can enjoy just sitting and listening to the piano. Some say it's dull." Jimin begins driving towards Jungkook's house.
"I don't think there's a problem with that." Jungkook's mind is never at peace. He's always over thinking, over analyzing, remembering distasteful and low moments in his life. "Being able to relax with soothing music and a friend is extraordinary to me. I don't think I've done that in years. Going home feels like a waste now that it's over." The younger male mumbles the last sentence.
"Do you want to go out to eat?" Jimin offers, grasping the subtle hint. "My treat."
"Well, if you're paying." Jungkook can't hide the creeping grin.
"This place is a lot more... gaudy than I had expected." Jungkook looks around, twitching awkwardly in his chair, not quite certain how to behave in such a dignified place.
"I thought it'll be weird to go to a fast food restaurant dressed in tuxedos after a deluxe concert." Jimin goes through the menu carefully.
"I'm surprised you managed to get us in." The younger male listens to the tunes they played. At the very least, the music was good.
"I'm close to the owner. He told me I can come whenever and bring whoever I'd like." Jimin glances up to see Jungkook staring at the menu, chewing on his lower lip during his reading process. Jimin never thought a grown man doing nothing out of the ordinary could be that attractive. He shakes his head. "Have you decided on something?"
"I don't know what half of those are." Jungkook pouts. "Can you order something for me? Like, pasta or chicken."
Jimin covers his mouth so that the younger male won't catch him giggling. "Sure, what do you want to drink?"
"Did you enjoy the food?" Jimin questions.
"Next time, I'll pick the place." Jungkook rests on his arm, staring blankly at the fancy glass of wine.
"I'll take that as a no." He laughs. "But hey, I've seen you lip syncing to the songs here."
"They're playing classics, I can't ignore that." Jungkook stares around. The area is very spacious and some people seem to be dancing. "Everyone else seems happy, I suppose it's the kind of atmosphere you don't feel at more simple restaurants."
"Do you dance, Jungkook?"
Jungkook raises an eyebrow at the suspicious inquiry. "Is that a suggestion or an innocent question?"
"A question, don't worry." Jimin assures him, although Jungkook spots a mischievous glint in his eyes.
"Not really, I'm not the best dancer." Jungkook takes a sip from his glass, answering regardless of his better judgment.
"Hmmm, not up to the challenge. I see, I see." Jimin nods to himself in a patronizing manner.
"Trying to provoke me? It won't work." Jungkook proudly states, but the older male isn't having it.
"Whatever you need to say in order to feel more confident Jungkook." He places his hand on Jungkook's shoulder. "It's alright to give up because you're not number one. Don't beat up yourself over it."
"Not gonna happen."
"It's okay to be scared! It's only human." Jimin rubs his chin, seemingly thinking what else might push the younger male to the edge. "I guess you're not up to the task unless you know for certain you can do it."
"You're insecure, it's fine."
"I'm not going to-"
"No, seriously, it's okay, I get it." Jimin smirks. "Don't force yourself to do things you can't keep up with."
Jungkook found himself at the center of the room, trying to follow Jimin's lead but failing miserably. He cannot believe he ended up falling for that reverse psychology shtick. Jimin can be truly terrifying when he wants something badly. "You're moving way too sloppily for someone who's usually agile. I get the feeling you're not into this."
"You are incredibly mean, do you know that?" Jungkook grumbles.
"Calm down Jungkook," Jimin laughs in a carefree demeanor. "Focus on the music and let your body move naturally."
"Easier said than done," Jungkook exhales, feeling Jimin squeeze his hand in comfort.
A well-known song plays and Jimin seems fired up, moving Jungkook in sync with him to the tune. "Her name was Lola, she was a showgirl." Shocking the younger male, Jimin sings along to Barry Manilow, swaying his hips, his expression untroubled momentarily.
Jungkook doesn't want to ruin this moment for the older male so he does his best to cooperate, finally moving along to the rhythm, matching Jimin's movements. At some point, he finds himself singing along. "Music and passion were always the fashion at the Copa."
"You have a lovely voice." Jimin compliments, twirling Jungkook before pulling him closer.
At that very second, the younger male became aware of the situation they're in. "You think so?" He decides to go along with his feelings that were telling him it's okay to relish in the occasional positive sensation. A day off from thoughts about death, assassination, his loneliness, his fears, his worries. For now, everything is gone. There's only the melody and Jimin in front of him, leading him.
"Yeah." Jimin grins. "You're also quite the dancer when you put in some effort."
"I try." When Jungkook locks eyes with Jimin, an intense wave of emotions washes over him. "Anyway," he frees himself from the older male's hold. "We should, um, probably go home. We have work tomorrow morning until late."
"You're right." Jimin runs a hand through his messy hair. "It's important to have energy."
Once again, inside of Jimin's car, they listen to the radio, not speaking. Until they arrive Jungkook's apartment. "I had a great time, let's do it again sometime." Jungkook vocalized his thoughts. "Next time would be on me."
"Sounds like a plan."
When Jungkook arrived to work the day after he was extremely tired. He didn't get home that late but he stayed up, spending most of his night thinking about his date, or whatever it was, with Jimin yesterday. "Are you okay? You look exhausted." Taehyung asks.
"Uh, yeah, didn't get much sleep is all." Jungkook rubs his temples in an attempt to pacify his forming headache.
"Any particular reason?" Taehyung seemed concerned.
Jungkook blushes. Saying he thought about his boss all night long after they went to recital and then danced together didn't sound like an appropriate response. "No." He quickly turns on his computer, trying to avoid any more investigating from his colleague.
Taehyung narrows his eyes, examining his rosy face. "You're hiding something."
"What? Where did you get this crazy idea?" Jungkook stammers, laughing nervously. He doesn't know why he's behaving so immaturely. Then, Jimin walks into the room, greeting everyone and apologizing for coming in late. He looked drained of energy unlike he looks regularly.
Taehyung looked at Jimin, then back to Jungkook. He gasps. "What did you two do?"
"Shut it!" Jungkook warns. "We just met up for a piano recital."
Leaning in closer, the older male stares at him in disbelief. "No, you're lying."
"I don't owe you an explanation over whatever imaginary scenario you've created in your head." Jungkook counters but Taehyung chuckles in response.
"Definitely a lot more than a recital happened." He hums happily, returning to typing on the PC.
Jungkook groans. Maybe he should have called in sick. He knows his co-worker doesn't have ill intentions but he's embarrassed. Jimin's been occupying his mind way too often these days. Jungkook likes talking to Jimin, talking with Jimin, listening to Jimin, thinking about Jimin. Everything related to the older male makes him feel at ease. He admires him, in a way, finding himself more drawn to him than he should be. They get along astonishingly well. Every other employee at the company noticed their growing relationship but no one made any direct comments to neither of them. Because of the way things are progressing, Jungkook's frightened. Getting attached to a target is unheard of. He dismisses those feelings, reminding himself who Jimin really is. It'll be fine. He'll execute the mission perfectly. Everything is lined up with his scheme. It won't take long before the older male is head over heels for him and before he knows it, before he can expect a good ending, Jungkook will strike him down, taking him out.
"Hey, Jimin," Taehyung catches the slightly older male a second sooner, managing to catch his attention, preventing him from going into his office.
"What is it, Tae?"
"You're a real backstabbing traitor, you know that?" Taehyung dramatically says. Jimin is confused.
"Huh? What's with you?"
"You tell us you're too busy to spend time with us but you have all the time in the world when it comes to Jungkook." Taehyung sulks.
"What?" Jimin is befuddled. "I asked him to go with me to a piano recital on our day off."
"Don't lie!" He points accusingly. "Admit it, you'd ditch us for him."
"You know that's not true." Jimin says, but feels guilty nevertheless. He has been neglecting the others. It wasn't on purpose, he ended up liking Jungkook's presence more than he had originally expected. "I'm sorry for making you feel ignored."
"So," Taehyung drags the word. "In order to make it up to us, come drinking with us tonight."
"I don't know if-"
"There you go deciding things on your again." Jimin rolls his eyes. "But I guess I have to."
"If this is all it took to convince you then you must really like Jungkook."
Taehyung shook his head, "Don't lie to me. Until he arrived, you'd never let anyone into your office. I think he's helping you change a little. For the better."
Jimin wouldn't describe himself as the most friendly person. He isn't cold, either. He's generally neutral, constantly thinking of ways to improve the company, working hard. Love never had much place in his life. He tried his best to support those in need and guide his employees who had their hearts in the right place, but eyes set on the wrong goals at times. He can get a good read of a person during one interview. For example, when he first met Taehyung, he knew from the start that this person is very open and sincere, extremely extroverted, not the most tactful but very intelligent and quick at picking things up. He was a natural at getting people to trust him. After all, he is the manager of his department. Eunkyung on the other hand, didn't have skills to lead. He didn't have much confidence but Jimin knew off the bat that it'll be smart to hire someone who is open about everything he thinks. Sure, there is Taehyung, but unlike him, Eunkyung can't read the air and sometimes it's refreshing. Jaekyung was timid, but left a strong impression. She worked hard to get to where she is. Yujin was almost invisible at times but the strongest wind isn't necessarily the one that is seen. She was clever, thinking of creative ways to do her work, to be more efficient. In her own, silent way, she worked to the bone. Sungyu was more of a future planner, helping make the schedules. And lastly, Jungkook. Jimin knew the younger male is shy, introverted and amateurish, but definitely not incompetent. He could see the determination in his eyes. The problem was that he could not understand where those traits come from. He doesn't know when Jungkook is expressing candor or when he is feigning. There's way too much he doesn't comprehend. He's sweet and gentle but a minute later, there's a dangerous aura around him. You could say that difficulty at understanding is what made Jimin have his eyes on him. The older male himself isn't extroverted either, but neither is he introverted. He's ambivalent. Especially when it comes to the younger male. The problem is, the more time he spends with Jungkook, the more he gradually grows on him. Jungkook's smile, laugh, tears. When he saw those, he had begun developing mixed feelings. Jimin's a very caring person in general and as the CEO he saw himself as a leader for everyone, doing what he can to help each and every one of them. But he can't deny he's giving extra treatment to him. Very similarly to Jungkook, Jimin's able to hide his true assessments but he doesn't want to do it when he's with the younger male. Whenever Jungkook shares the smallest piece of his life story with this meaningful expression on his face, Jimin immediately gets absorbed, willing to do anything for a few words. The more he hears about Jungkook, the more he wants to embrace him and rub his back as he murmurs into his neck 'it's going to be okay'. That's unprofessional but he can't help it. His affection scale grew a lot during the weeks he had spent with the younger male, talking about anything that comes to mind. Yet when he thinks they have mutual understanding and want, Jungkook caves in. He questions what is it that's stopping them. Fear of intimacy, perhaps, after losing someone very dear to him. But he can't stop thinking that maybe there's more to him. A lot more than Jungkook can handle by himself. That's why, after those past two days, Jimin promised to himself he'll get closer to Jungkook. Close enough so that he'll be able to hold him, to comfort him, to encourage him, to support him, anything he needs. Jimin is worried he might be a tad too invested in him but at some point he stopped caring. He's been detached from people romantically for such a long time that he forgot what it means to be completely genuine. He'll have to be more straightforward. No more beating around the bush. He likes Jungkook and if that's unethical then screw it. He's trying to figure things out and repressing it won't do anyone any good.
"Tae, did you invite Jungkook to join us?" Jimin asks when there are a few minutes left until the clock marks the end of their work day.
"He doesn't respond to me." Taehyung sulks. Jimin is baffled. "I teased him about meeting up with you, I guess he took it too hard." That clarifies things.
"Do you mind if I ask him?"
"Knock yourself out." Taehyung stares at Jungkook's booth, watching type as fast as light.
Making his way to the focused younger male, Jimin lightly taps on his shoulder. "Taehyung, I told you-"
"Wrong guy." Jimin says when Jungkook turns around in his chair.
"S-Sorry, he was bothering me the entire day, I thought you were him."
"Don't take his words too seriously. He may tease you often but that's due to his annoying but, um, winning personality." Jungkook snorts.
"Did you need me for something?"
"Actually, I'm here to ask you out." Jimin confidently informs.
Jungkook doesn't fathom what the older male is saying until he turns red, coughing. "Huh?" Surely, he must be joking.
"We're going to get a drink, I wanted to invite you."
"Oh." Jungkook stares dumbly, forgetting to give him an answer.
"I'll take that as a yes." Jimin doesn't wait for him to reply, returning to his office in order to finish the last paper.
"How did you persuade him?"
"It's very simple, Tae." Jimin stapled the paper. "I didn't wait for him to say yes or no and assumed he was joining us, leaving before he had a chance to protest."
Taehyung snickers. "Real mature."
"You're one to talk."
Everyone gathered at the bar, two minutes from their workplace, sitting at a big table. "I dreamt of that moment when all of us are together here but I never imagined I'll live long enough to see it happen."
"No need to overreact Tae," Jimin rests on his hand, watching as Jungkook changed his position restlessly, trying not to invade the former's space.
"Let's drink!" Eunkyung seems excited. "And Jungkook, this is a mixed place. Maybe you can find yourself a man here!"
"Thanks for, eh, looking out for me." The youngest male is stiff.
"Loosen up a little. We're friends." He offers a kind smile and Jungkook returns the gesture, stumping the people at the table. "I have never seen you smile!"
"Is it just me or does he remind you of a bunny too?" Jaekyung contemplates out loud.
"You're right, there is something." Sungyu agrees.
"Let's drink." Jimin changes the topic and Jungkook is grateful. Spending an evening with people is stressful but it has its benefits. He doesn't feel as lonely. Sleepily, Jungkook rests against the window. Without as much as looking at him, Jimin pulls him so that he'll rest on his shoulder instead. Jungkook wanted to move his head to get his co-workers to stop eyeing them but the older male played with his hair, making it impossible for him to resist. Deciding to bear with it, he downs another shot. Jimin gets a flashback to the previous event that included Jungkook drinking. Instead of saying anything about it, he drinks, but keeps himself in check. Jungkook, on the other hand, is already tipsy and giggly, cheeks flushed down to his neck.
"You okay?" Taehyung is the first to comment.
"He's like this when he gets drunk." Jimin breathes out heavily as Jungkook moves to press himself against him, hugging his hand.
"Do you have first-hand experience?" They gawk at him expectantly.
"Yeah, we went drinking once after work." Jimin can't seem to concentrate when Jungkook's hot breath fans over his neck. This wasn't what he expected to happen. He wanted to take the younger male home sober and talk things over with him. He'll do it tomorrow.
"You two need a moment alone?" Eunkyung tilts his head aside, feeling as if he's breaching their privacy, despite the fact they're in public.
"No, I'll just move to a different seat." The older male tries to stand up but Jungkook is holding onto his arm, nuzzling against it and whining whenever Jimin made a move. "Or not. That's also acceptable."
"You're helpless." Taehyung clicks his tongue.
"Jimin, Jimin, Jiminnie hyung." Jungkook sings with a silly smile on his face.
"Yes, he did that during the previous time." Jimin ruffles Jungkook's hair, trying to get him to stop being clingy. It wasn't effective. Might as well go with it. The night passes and slowly but surely, Jungkook is getting drunker and is moving closer and closer until he's sitting on Jimin's lap. Whenever Jimin or one of the other people tried to remove him, he'd make a fuss. A real commotion. Everyone gave up and let him be. Jungkook, with his hands wrapped around Jimin's neck and head placed on his shoulders, was annoyed Jimin wasn't holding him.
"Hug me." He demanded, using a cutesy voice.
The older male was puzzled. He didn't know how to act. He stared at his friends for answers but they cheered for him to do so. Not in the mood to be patient, Jungkook grabbed Jimin's hands and wrapped them around himself. Even though he wasn't sober, he felt safe, babbling in satisfaction about how much of a great boss Jimin is. The latter severely doubts it but he can't think of a way to deal with the male's antics. "Where are you going?" Jimin watched as everyone stood up at once.
"Home, it's kinda late."
"Please don't leave me alone with him." Jimin is distressed. "I have no clue what to do."
"I don't know," Taehyung is doubtful. "You seem to be doing fine."
"You can take him home, you know where he lives right?" Yujin suggests. On cue, the youngest male groans as a way to show his disapproval. "We'll see you tomorrow sir, it was great of you to join us and we appreciate you very much. Good night."
Jungkook was too adorable for his own sake, so out of character, so affectionate and loving, so... close. Jimin decided that from this moment forward, he isn't going to go anywhere near drunk Jungkook. "C'mon Jungkook, return to yourself before things take a turn for the worst."
"But I like hyung." Jungkook almost purrs, pressing a wet kiss to Jimin's neck.
Goosebumps appear on the older male's body. He wasn't anticipating that. "You shouldn't-" But Jungkook isn't listening, kissing him again. Kissing his neck, his jaw line, his cheek, barely ghosting over his lips. He spreads his legs, moving to straddle Jimin. God, why does Jungkook have to be one of those guys that get super horny when they're drunk? His fingers tangle in the older male's hair, roughly pulling him, closing the distance between them with an open mouthed kiss. Jimin almost melts, unable to find strength to pause and think this through like last time when Jungkook grinds on him. To be fair, the situation wasn't as steamy when they were at the younger male's place. Jungkook's hands glide down to Jimin's nape, to his back. They were getting it on right in the middle of the bar, which is something Jimin would typically never do but he underestimated how the person you like can change your perspective. If it weren't for the bartender telling them to stop dry humping, Jimin's pretty sure he would have lost his self control and fucked him on the table like he was begging him to. He snaps to reality. "Jungkook, listen to me." He says, more assertive and strict, "I'm taking you home and then leaving."
"But why?" Jungkook pants, trying to lean in to kiss him.
"Because this isn't right. You're not sober, you're not in the right mindset and I almost lost myself there." Jimin grunts, utterly disappointed with himself. Jimin did drink and was probably closer to tipsy than sober but that doesn't excuse his behavior. Jungkook's effect on him is strong, he has to keep it in mind. This is the second time he slips. He wants to convey his feelings to the younger male. Until then, he has to refrain from inappropriate acts. Jimin has no idea how Jungkook sees their relationship either, he can't decide to sleep with him out of the blue. "And tomorrow, when you're over your hangover, I'll tell you everything that happened along with a personal message from me to you. Okay?"
Chapter 5: If You're in Love, Then You Are the Lucky One
sometimes confessing doesn't go as expected
Whew a new chapter
sorry ahead for mistakes since english isn't my native language but
still hope you'll like it nevertheless!
comments are very much appreciated
From the moment Jungkook had opened his eyes, he felt an immense wave of regret wash over him. He doesn't remember anything - that's how he knows he must have fucked up. His headache is forming and he rubs his temples, blinking a few times in order to adjust to the light coming from the drawn curtains. Coughing a little, he could smell the scent of alcohol reeking from his mouth. He should probably brush his teeth. Finding needed strength to stand up, he warily walked to the bathroom, reaching a hand to grab his toothbrush and catching a glimpse of himself in the mirror. If he's being fair, he looked worse when he was seventeen. He sighs. The sound of his phone beeping distracts him, almost causing him to drop everything he's holding. After the flavor of mistakes is mostly washed away, he returns to the bedroom, checking the message. It's from Jimin.
'You can be late today or not show up at all, if you don't feel that well. Take care, okay?'
Although there's a question mark at the end of this text, Jungkook gets the feeling Jimin isn't anticipating a response. In fact, it seems—to a certain degree at the very least—that the older male is trying to convince him not to come. Jungkook wonders what happened. He can't recall anything. He was too nervous, being out with everyone like that, sitting so close to Jimin when he's trying to sort out everything he doesn't understand. He used drinking as a coping mechanism. He noted to himself that he should never do that again, especially if he's near Jimin. Good things never come from this. Jungkook decides to take Jimin on his words and takes his time in the shower, letting the hot water calm his senses as best they can. For once, just once, he doesn't want to think, over analyze, reminisce, to feel all that regret. Right now, he focuses on the water, clearing his head. It's not possible to ignore the feeling of remorse flowing inside but it's not going to stop him from trying. Eating, drinking, getting dressed up. Jungkook does it all slowly, stalling for as long as he can. The headache wasn't going away any time soon, but he decided against taking a pain killer. To punish himself for his reckless decisions more than anything. He drives the car incredibly slow, getting a lot of curses from other drivers behind him. He didn't care that much. The moment he got inside the elevator, he felt sick. His nerves are high. When he steps into the department, everybody tears their gaze away from the screens, staring at him. He hears whispering but ignores it, taking his seat next to Taehyung's booth. The latter looks at him. "Damn Jungkook, you do not look that great."
"Yes Taehyung." Jungkook turns on the computer. "I, too, have eyes."
"How are you after yesterday?" Taehyung wonders, somewhat worried.
"Not that good." Jungkook exhales. "I can't figure out why everyone is staring me down, either."
"Oh." Taehyung laughs tensely. "I'm assuming you forgot what happened at the bar."
Jungkook nods. "Can you shed some light on it? That'll be a big help."
"I don't know, I don't think it's any of my business." He rubs the back of his neck awkwardly. "That's between you and Jimin in my opinion. You should talk to him."
Crap, so something serious did happen between them. Fantastic. And on the one occasion where he doesn't want Taehyung to keep his mouth shut, he actually does. "Taehyung, we've been working together for quite a while now, huh?" The older male hums in agreement. "I think I'd consider you a friend, for most parts."
"Aww, that's swee-"
"And as friends, isn't it your responsibility to help me out when I need some guidance?" Jungkook tilts his head to the side.
"I guess, but-"
"And as friends, I have no reason to choke-hold you for answers, right? Since you'll tell me on your own." Jungkook glares. Taehyung gulps, reluctantly relenting. "Wonderful. Do tell."
"You, uh, got super smashed and sat on Jimin's lap, forcing him to hug you." Taehyung clears his throat. "When we left home, I saw you two making out and grinding, kinda."
Almost instantly, Jungkook reddened. Not as threatening anymore. "Oh for the love of- And you didn't think of stopping me?" Jungkook unintentionally raises his voice, attracting more attention than he had intended.
"Hey, we tried!" Taehyung defends. "But every time we tried to move you away from Jimin, you'd yell at us and cling onto him like some koala."
Jungkook covers his face. "I just want to die."
"Imagine how Jimin feels." Taehyung tries to put things into perspective. "I realize you're facing conflicting emotions but Jimin isn't hunky-dory either."
"I understand that." There goes Jungkook's plan to not feel bad. Right into the garbage. Jimin must be suffering. He is a man with a pure heart. His guilty conscience has to be shouting at him.Jungkook's at fault. He's always the one to blame. He manages to get close to someone as a target and ends up caring about his feelings beyond what's mandatory. How it came to this, he isn't sure, but he knows he has to fix it. Every since he left the orphanage, he forgot what proper human contact is. He has no idea how to apologize, how to do better, but that won't stop him from trying. He's silent for a few minutes. Taehyung wonders if that's all he had to say about the situation. "I think I should talk to him." He gets up and rushes to the older male's office, not paying attention to his co-worker's protest. Knocking gently on the door, Jungkook remembers the anxiety he had felt the first he was here. It was a different type of fear. Not wanting to fail his mission, wanting to succeed as the top notch assassin he's known to be. But at this moment, all he could think about is the older male and wanting to make amends with him. It's funny how time can change you, Jungkook thinks, gathering every ounce of courage to stop himself from returning to his mildly comfortable seat. At some point, pretending he doesn't care when he's by himself became impossible. Acting becoming reality. No one could have guessed this development. If there is a God, if he truly exists and watches over everything we do, Jungkook thinks he must be laughing at him right now. At his misery, at his self-importance. His grimness disappears when he hears the older male.
"Come in." Jimin announces, eyes visibly widening when he sees the younger male. "Ah, Jungkook, how are you?"
"I'm-I'm fine," His voice cracks. Not having basic control over your own mouth contradict his statement. "How are you?"
"I'm alright, making do." Jimin regains his composure. "What brought you to my office?"
"I want to say sorry." He suddenly bows. "For being late, and yesterday. Everything in general, I'm so sorry that I'm such a terrible employee while you were kind enough to show me, um, kindness!"
Despite the surprise and the seemingly legitimate apology, the older male started laughing, catching Jungkook off guard, forcing him to lift his burning face. "Sometimes you're horrible with words to the point it's funny." Jimin makes his way to stand in front of the younger male. "It wasn't your fault entirely, I didn't do everything I could to stop you before. Don't be hard on yourself."
"You're not upset?" Jungkook asks.
"Not one bit, don't worry yourself over what happened." Jimin smiles. "Actually, now that you're here, there is something I'd like to talk to you about."
"Shouldn't we sit then?"
"It will be quick." Jimin scans the room, trying to find something that'll motivate him to speak up. In the end, he looks the younger male in the eyes, giving him a soft smile. "First thing first, I have to confess about us kissing when we went drinking, the two of us. I figured you might remember already considering you know what happened yesterday but still, I wanted to get it off my chest. For that, I'm sorry."
Jungkook's amazed at how genuine Jimin is being. He can't deny he admires him a little more after hearing the older male being honest over something so minor. "It's... okay. No reason to apologize."
"That's not the main reason why I wanted to talk to you, though." Jimin bites his lower lip. "Jungkook, I... I have never in my life thought that a situation where I would treat one of my employees more fondly than the others would become reality. I tend to be neutral, to keep things fair but I kept favoring you, enjoying your company more than I should have. From the moment you've walked into my office I felt this click. The more time we spent together, the more I heard alarms going in my head, telling me that it's not smart to keep you near me but there was no helping it. I ended up liking you."
"Liking... me?" Jungkook's confused. He's confused and his head hurts. His stomach hurts. His brain hurts. Everything hurts. Especially his heart.
"Yes." Jimin confirms. "I like you. I can't stop thinking about you and how lovely, cute and fun you are. You're interesting, I suppose you could say that I am fascinated with you. I just can't shake off the feeling, I feel the urge to pull you close whenever you're next to me and I want to help you so much. It reaches a point where it exceeds my normal sympathy for people." Jimin runs a hand through his hair. "I didn't plan on telling you this early in the morning but I felt like there was no way for me to keep it. Every day felt like a missed opportunity so I wanted to jump the gun, I guess you could say." Jimin looks down, the sound of his heartbeat loud and clear. "And I figure it must be weird for you. Nevertheless I wanted to tell you like that instead of being subtle about it. I don't know how you feel and I don't want to put you on the spot, but do you like me, at least to an extent where you'd consider a date?"
Jungkook gazes at him. He can't close his eyes and due to the dryness, tears start to form. His throat felt stuffy, he couldn't muster the confidence to say anything. He was disordered, finding it impossible to mutter a proper response. Jimin is standing in front of him, admitting to everything Jungkook can't even think about and he begins trembling violently. It aches, it burns, it hurts. He can't do anything except fall to his knees and apologize repeatedly. His mind was in an eerie place, imagining catastrophic images. Everything is wrong. This can't be right. Those words he hears are lies. They agonize him and he keeps muttering nothing over and over. He couldn't hear anything, all was blurred out. Jimin's voice is vague and despite the fact he's yelling, trying to pull him together, Jungkook can only faintly hear him, can barely register the worried expression on his face. He can't contain it anymore - the sickness in his core intensifies and he loses it. Instead of saying the words he wanted to say, he throws up the contents of his stomach on the floor before his consciousness fades completely.
"Jungkook, what would you want to be when you grow up?" One of the kids asked him, his curious eyes examining his hand that was holding Yesung's.
"I don't know." He says, trying his best to cut this conversation short.
The boy sticks out his tongue childishly. Since he was eight and Jungkook was thirteen, he probably expected a more engaging answer. "What about you Yesung?"
"I don't know what I want to be when I'll grow up but," Yesung pulls Jungkook closer, ruffling his hair. "I want to always be with Jungkookie."
No one could miss the scarlet shade covering Jungkook's usually apathetic face. "Then maybe you can be Jungkook's husband!" One of the girls said.
Yesung blushed a little as well. "Maybe."
When they returned to their shared rooms a while before curfew, Jungkook followed his best friend to his bed. "Hyung." He pouted. "Why did you have to say you'll marry me? Because of that, everyone teased me the entire day!"
"I said maybe Kookie." His older friend grins, pulling him in for a hug. "It's not my fault you have selective hearing and hear what you want to."
"For someone who's considered the nicest kid around, you sure know how to be mean." Jungkook hugs him in return, burying his head in the crook of his neck.
"But you know Kook, the reason I only said maybe and not yes is because I need you to be okay with it." He runs his thin fingers through Jungkook's messy hair. "One day, when we'll be older, we'll get away from here and live the better life we deserve."
"But you're going to leave first..." Jungkook closes his eyes, resisting his will to cry.
"I may be able to leave before you but you'll bet I'm taking you with me the second you turn eighteen." Yesung kisses Jungkook's head. "I'll be here at midnight on September 1st with flowers and a wedding ring. How's that for a grand exit?"
Jungkook can't hide the huge smile plastered on his face. "It's perfect."
The walls of his room are white. It almost feels as if he's in an asylum. It's quiet, but dark. He's alone and the feeling of loneliness takes over him. The world seemed so small back then. Just the orphanage, him and Yesung. Nothing more, nothing less. Life wasn't ideal, but it was enough. Someone to promise him happiness. Whether those were empty promises or not didn't matter. They were all that Jungkook needed back then, his sole motivation to work harder. He supposes he can't expect things to go his way, ever. He wonders if Jimin changed his mind after he vomited on his office floor. He would have chuckled if it weren't for him feeling sorry. Maybe he should go back to sleep. Just as he was about to hug his pillow, someone rang the bell. The noise was annoying. Hesitantly he got up, checking the peeping hole. It was Jimin. Confounded, he opened the door, inviting him in. "Jungkook, hi, are you feeling less ill?"
"I think so." They sit on the couch, the air somewhat more awkward but that's to be expected.
"I, uh, bought you soup. I don't know if you like it but I thought it might help." He hands Jungkook the bag with the take out. "And about today..." Here it comes. He's going to get scolded. Maybe fired. At least he has soup as a condolences prize. "I'm sorry if what I said overwhelmed you. If you feel uncomfortable with it, I'll gladly never mention it again. I wouldn't want to ruin the friendship we've built. Aside from my romantic feelings, I do think you're a worthy member of our department and I think you're outstanding."
"Huh?" Jungkook almost drops the soup. "You're not going to fire me?"
"For what? Puking on my floor?" Jungkook groans, covering his face in embarrassment. "Don't get me wrong, it was quite a sight to behold."
"Don't remind me. Please."
"Sorry. Fresh wound." Jimin simpers. "If you're okay, I should go. You don't have to come tomorrow if you're feeling under the weather."
Jungkook grabs the older male's hand before he has the chance to get up. "Wait, about what you said." After what seems very much like forever, he speaks again. "I have no idea what I'm feeling or how to deal with it. It's been so long since I've last felt affection from someone and towards someone and I... I know it's silly but I feel like I'm betraying a dead but dear person to me by opening myself up to someone else."
"It's not silly at all, those are your feelings." Jimin intertwines his hand with Jungkook's, reassuring him by gently caressing his cheek. "I think you don't know how to express yourself and that's fine. I'm not forcing you to do or say anything you don't want."
"I can't find the ability in me to convey everything I'm feeling, I can't grasp my own emotions and it's making me scared." Jungkook admits, for the first time in almost six years. "I've repressed my true feelings for too long, I forgot what it means to be myself. It's like I have no control over anything and I'm afraid, I can't... I can't do it anymore. It's aggravating."
"Jungkook, these kind of things take time." Jimin scoots closer, running his thumb in soothing circles. "You have to rebuild yourself. Those things begin with expressing the most simple emotions. If you've been oppressed for such a long time, the only way to release some of that frustration is to let it all out at once."
"What do you mean?"
"I might have an idea. Can you go get dressed?" Jimin asks. Normally Jungkook would question him about it but he can't be bothered at the moment. He puts on casual clothes and brushes his teeth, to wash away the flavor of vomit and follows Jimin to his car.
"Where are we going?" Jungkook wonders out loud.
"It's a place called Hit & Smash." Jimin says. Jungkook furrows his eyebrows in befuddlement. "You'll see."
Even when they arrive, Jungkook can't still make out what this place is meant for. "Jimin! What brings you here?"
"Heya Soonie, I'm here for my friend. Give him the deluxe package, alright?" Jimin opens his wallet and gives him a rather large sum of money.
"You got it. Come after me kid." Jungkook decides to trust Jimin and follow the man. Jimin walks behind them. They arrive at a mirror glass that reflects into a room full of fragile items. "Here you go." He provides Jungkook with a baseball bat. "Have at it."
"What?" Jungkook blinks.
"Go into the room and smash everything, break it all dude. Jimin paid for it already." Soonie points at the door.
"I'm not sure I get it."
"Jungkook, go into the room and let out your anger." Jimin explains. "Think of it as a step towards rehabilitation."
"In case you were wondering, the mirror glass is here for us to supervise over our customers. It's to make sure they don't get hurt by anything or self harm." He opens the way for Jungkook to enter. "Don't worry, it'll be a good way to release stress. Knock yourself out. You have fifteen minutes."
Jungkook stares around the room. The last time he used a bat was when he played with Yesung at the yard. He was never good at swinging it but his friend managed to catch the ball every time. Swinging weakly, he hits a glass, watching as it breaks altogether, flying to the floor. The adrenaline flows and he hits a plate this time, listening to the sound of it breaking. It gives him a sense of rush and within seconds he started hitting everything in reach, breathing heavily. Making his way to an expensive looking vase, he doesn't think twice, smashing it to pieces and hitting the table it was on again and again, until it cracks the bat a little. He pants, feeling angry, feeling disappointed, feeling upset. His toes curl and he bites his lower lip harshly until it bleeds, staring at an old looking piano. It's most likely broken, it's so rusty and ugly. Jungkook loses it and screams. He can't command himself to stop, kicking and slamming the stupid piano, breaking its legs and tearing away the almost gone keys from it. "You-you promised!" He yells at nothing. "You promised you'll take me away from this hell hole. You said we deserve better!" He breaks the bat in two, stabbing it through the lid. "You said you'll change my world, you said it'll be better." He cries, shouting the words out his throat, losing what little restraint he had. He doesn't care anymore that anyone can see him. Everyone needs to know how much he's carrying on his small, still child-like shoulders. "How dare you lie to me?" He punches the music rack, breaking it with the cost of his hand bleeding. "You said... I will amount to something. That we will be something more than neglected orphans." He sits on the damaged piano bench, resting his crying face on the messed up keyboard. "So then, why...? Why did you have to die and leave me alone? I can't make it on my own, I hate it. I want to die, I want to die, I want to-"
"Jungkook," Jimin calls tenderly, pulling him to his embrace, "Maybe that's enough for now, okay? Take deep breaths and clear your head."
"I don't, I don't want to, I just, I want to stop. How do I make it stop?" Jungkook breathes out, his voice shaky.
"It's okay, it'll pass, hey look at me." Jimin sits on the floor, not wanting to break the weak bench. "It's going to be okay, you're not alone from now on." He wipes away the streaming tears. Falling to the floor, Jungkook lets the older male hold him until he stops quivering. "Maybe it was a bad idea to let it flood you so strongly after barely being able to confront me liking you."
Jungkook hums, finding the way Jimin plays with his hair endearing. "Everything that happened since that moment probably made you stop, huh?"
"Wish it were the case." Jimin tugs Jungkook's hair behind his hair. "I still adore you." He leans in close for what Jungkook originally thought was his lips but he ends up kissing his cheek, tasting his salty tears. "I think I've mentioned this before but you're pretty when you cry."
"I believe you said cute." Jungkook jokes, glad that Jimin is here to lighten the mood.
"It works both ways." Jimin winks. "Come on, I'll take you home." He helps Jungkook to get back up on his feet, though he's somewhat wobbly from the intense crying and breaking. "Thanks Soonie." Jimin bids his goodbyes, driving Jungkook to his apartment. "Do you want a day off tomorrow?"
The younger male shakes his head, wrapping his hands around Jimin's neck. "I'll be fine, I think."
"I'm relieved to hear that." Jimin holds Jungkook by the waist, inching forward.
No amount of atonement can erase the sins Jungkook committed, no therapist will heal everything he's dealing with, no drink strong enough to make him forget that pain. And yet, when he's with Jimin, he realizes he's a person. Sometimes it's easy to ignore that fact. He's human. He makes mistakes. He misses chances. He falls down. He gets kicked in his lowest moments. He is depressed, sad, isolated and a murderer. But... Jimin makes him want to stand up once more, to live life. He leans in, capturing his lips in what Jungkook can only describe as the softest kiss ever. He doesn't think he deserves the contentment of Jimin pulling him impossibly close, deepening the kiss and raking his fingers in his hair. It's not sexual, different from how it was the two previous times. They're both sober and Jungkook's mind is the clearest it has been. When they disconnect, Jungkook flushes. "I think that, maybe, I like you too. A little."
Jimin beams. "The date offer is valid."
Chapter 6: My Immortal is Slowly Dying On Me, My Love
Jungkook and Jimin's first date
whew another update! Hope you like it and sorry ahead for any grammar mistakes
Comments are always very much appreciated!
Ever since Jungkook left the orphanage, he forgot what happiness is. The joyous feeling of finding something that will make you feel whole, even if for a short moment. It was so rare that he forgot this emotion exists. It's more profound than he had remembered, maybe it's because he can't stop thinking about Jimin. It's impossible to wipe away that dumb smile plastered on his bashful face. Staring at the ceiling, he thought if someone like him deserves to know this sensation. You'd think after years of killing, you become numb and immune to the guilt, to your faults, to your past worries, but it haunts Jungkook constantly. When he was a child, everything was so black and white, there's one thing right and the other is wrong. He believed in it strongly, and every time he read an article about a murderer, drug dealer, thug, whoever it was, getting the benefit of the doubt, he was angry. He didn't believe they were rightful owners of that mercy. But when you dirty your hands yourself, when you find yourself in such an absurd situation, you begin realizing that life has a gray area, a middle ground that people don't mention most of the time. There are circumstances to all kinds of situations people don't usually face in their everyday lives. Perhaps it was part of growing up - figuring out more meanings the world has to offer. Whether those were positive or negative things didn't matter. The truth is, in the end, despite everything, each person can't always choose for themselves. He can't deny that there is a certain baggage forced upon everyone, no one has a perfect life. Some have it more easy than others, yes, but that just means that in times of hardships it'll be much harder for them to face reality. But what makes you who you are is the actions you choose to do on your own. He wonders how it'll be at work tomorrow. His fondness is showing, he might need to hide it in order to avoid Taehyung's incredible skill of deduction whenever he and Jimin are in the same room. Although for certain, it'll be more interesting at the office.
Morning couldn't be any more demanding, forcing him to wake up from his decent slumber and going to work. He's agitated, but he's got years of experience in hiding his sincere feelings. He puts on his poker face and makes his way to the seat. Taehyung greets him. "Good morning, what's up with the good mood today?"
Jungkook wonders how the hell he even noticed that. "What good mood? I'm the same as I was two days ago."
"You can't fool me, I'm a pro at dealing with people." Taehyung claims in a rather proud manner. "Actually, I'm gonna go ahead and guess it's Jimin related but seeing as he scolded me for pestering you, I won't say anything else."
"Say, Taehyung," Jungkook is curious. "You're Jimin's best friend, right?"
"Sort of. I do think he prefers you but I've known him a for a few years." Taehyung stretches in his chair. "Why?"
"No reason, I just, um, wanted to know." Jungkook clears his throat, trying not to let his embarrassment get the best of him.
Taehyung smirks at him and it annoys the younger male but he can't say anything without exposing himself. "Alright everyone." Jimin's powerful voice resonates in the department. "Today's our scheduled self defense class, as always. Everyone should assemble at the usual meeting place. Jungkook, I have decided to dismiss you from it seeing as you are already proficient. Instead, I want to have a talk with you in my office, then you have some free time. You're welcome to do whatever it is that you find fit with that extra hour. Nevertheless, I'll be joining you all in a few minutes. In my office." He signals Jungkook to come in. Gulping, the latter makes his way into Jimin's room, questioning if he had already started to mess up everything.
"You wanted to talk to me?" Jungkook reluctantly asks.
"No need to be official," Jimin reassured. "Take a seat."
And Jungkook does, he settles in front of the older male. "What is it?"
"Well, after yesterday," Jimin leans in, resting his head on his palm. "I was a little too excited and couldn't stop thinking about you." Jungkook bites inside his cheek, fighting back a smile. "And I wanted to ask you out, again. If you want that is."
Jungkook nods, unable to find words. "I really want to." He succeeds to stutter out.
Jimin's content expression fills Jungkook with butterflies. "Great, when do you want to go out?" He gently places his hand on the younger male's cheek, gazing at him lovingly.
"U-Um, whenever you can." Jungkook appreciates the sentiment of Jimin's sweet gestures but it makes his heart race in a way he hasn't gotten used to yet.
"Do you have time today, after work?" Jimin moves closer, slowly rising up from his chair.
"Yes." Jungkook chokes out before being bewitched by Jimin, closing his eyes expectantly, liking the way Jimin's lips feel against his own. They're soft, luscious and he can't help but tangle his hand in Jimin's hair.
"Jimin, the instructor wants you to join us." Taehyung bursts the door open, his eyes widening in shock when he sees what the pair has been up to. "Talk about exploiting your employees." He clicks his tongue.
"No, I wasn't-"
"Yeah, yeah." Taehyung walks outside, ignoring anything else they might have added. Jungkook's not going to hear the end of it. Neither is Jimin.
"That went well." Jimin laughs. "I should go."
"Can I... join you guys?" Jungkook asks in a quiet voice. He was quite demure today, compared to him being more mysterious than reserved.
"Are you sure it won't be boring for you?" Jimin holds the door open for the younger male, just like the gentleman he has proven himself to be. "You know everything."
"I thought it was a nice excercise to do with everyone. Besides, I might be of assistance." Jungkook excuses. He doesn't want to be alone, he wants to be with his co-workers but more importantly, with Jimin.
"Oh, Jungkook, I thought you were released." Eunkyung says when he comes in with Jimin.
"He was, but he wanted to do it anyway." Jimin explains. "He likes you all very much and doesn't want to spend a minute away from you."
"I doubt we're the ones he likes." Jaekyung mumbled under her breath. Jimin let it slide and decided to focus on self defense instead.
The entire lesson Jimin and Jungkook stood way too close to each other in order for it to be friendly but no one commented. When it was over, the instructor complimented them for improving so much. "Taehyung," Jimin says, grabbing the younger male by the shoulder. "I need to talk with you in my office."
Jungkook glances at them cautiously, wondering if it's about him and Jimin kissing. He vanishes those worries and gets to working. After a while, he notices Taehyung has not returned yet. What could they be talking about for so long, he ponders. He wasn't jealous or anything, more concerned than anything. Soon, though, Taehyung came back to his chair, smiling to himself, then at Jungkook. "Why are you looking at me like that?"
"You're going to have a great time today." He winks. Jungkook's blood boils and he becomes embarrassingly red.
It was difficult to focus with Taehyung peering at him, a proud expression covering his face. He resists the urge to give him an infamous dirty look. When lunch break started, Jungkook follows everyone to their usual place, feeling more nervous than always when Jimin sits next to him. It was hard to breathe, he had to get away. Jungkook got up, excusing himself as he made way to the bathroom, washing his face with cold water. He must have been staring at his own reflection for a while because Jimin walks inside the restroom. "Are you okay?"
"Yeah... Yeah I'm good." Jungkook tries to force a smile.
"It's okay if you're anxious, I know you're not used to this." Jimin tries to help him go lax. "I'm sorry for kissing you earlier, I wasn't thinking about your discomfort and I've made it worse for you." Jungkook disagrees. Jimin's gentle touch calmed him instantly and there's nothing he wanted to do more than to press himself against the older male again. Seeing as no one was there to stop them, he pulled Jimin to his embrace, breathing in and out as a way to relax. Taken aback, Jimin pulls through and hugs him. Their height difference doesn't feel that significant when they're in each others' arms.
"Man, why is it taking them forever?" Sungyu asks when more than necessary time passes.
"Maybe I should go check on them." Eunkyung says, ready to stand up before Taehyung stops him.
"I have to say," Jimin clears his throat. "I've never cuddled someone in a public bathroom."
Jungkook giggles coyly. "There's a first time to everything."
"If it's with you, I don't mind if there's a second, third or even eighth time to this." Jimin flirts.
Jungkook can't wait for the day to end. Taehyung clicks his tongue when the clock hits seven and Jungkook turns off his computer in speed light, dashing into Jimin's office. To think that only this morning he tried to seem nonchalant about everything. There's a cute side even to the ever suspicious Jungkook. He knocks on the door, entering when Jimin invites him inside. "Someone's enthusiastic." The older male grins.
"I'm not." Jungkook weakly defends.
"Alright, if you say." Jimin grabs the keys from his desk, following Jungkook to the door and locking it behind them.
"We're not staying late today?" The younger male is surprised.
"No." Jimin motions him to keep walking, and they get inside the elevator. "Did you know that we have a roof?" He presses the highest floor.
Jungkook thinks back for a second. "Yes, I think it's constantly locked after there was a story of someone almost falling off while smoking."
"You're right." Jimin steps out. Jungkook is up on his trail. "But only I have the key to open the door. Today, though, I lent the key to Taehyung. I needed him to do something for me." He grabs the doorknob and opens it to reveal a staircase. "He owes me a favor for something that happened a long time ago, I decided to use his promise today." They climb up together but the more steps they took, the more afraid Jungkook had felt. This suddenly feels real in a way he hasn't figured out. Feeling the tension in the air, Jimin offered his hand. Jungkook takes it. The anxiety doesn't disappear but it's less present within him. "Anyway, after yesterday, I didn't go home, I went here."
"I didn't know when we'll go out on a date or if you'll regret agreeing to it later but I wanted to be ready. Is that weird? Probably a little." Jimin confesses. "To be fair, I'm new to liking someone so I suppose I wanted to impress you." After the long way up, they're faced with another door. "I decorated this place. Taehyung gave a helping hand." He opens the door.
Jungkook stares in awe. There were colorful and shining Christmas lights tied to the railing, making the marvelous view of the starry night sky all the more beautiful. In the middle stood a stereo, beneath it a large blanket and a picnic box besides it. "What... What is this?"
"I might have went overboard." Jimin laughs, more at himself, before closing the door. "Actually, I thought a lot about what you said in the car. About the fact that it's rare for you to relax and enjoy things." He leads Jungkook to sit down besides him, turning on the sound system. The volume wasn't that high but the younger male could hear the softly playing piano. "I know you've led a pretty... difficult life. I can't imagine the things you've been through and I'd never say I can fix it, because in the end that's what shaped you into being who you are, a person I'm very much fond of." Jungkook tucks his hair behind his ear unconsciously out of shyness. He used to do it whenever Yesung got too close or comforted him. Old habits die hard. "Anyway, I just want to be here for you. Whenever you need someone to lean on, know you can trust me. I won't force you to tell me anything you don't want but whatever it is that you're willing to share, I'll listen." He intertwines his hand with Jungkook's.
"I don't know what to say." The younger male is at loss for words.
"I do," Jimin reaches for the box. "Do you want to eat?"
Almost on cue, Jungkook's stomach growls. "What did you bring?"
"Well, I remembered you not liking the fancy food, so," He takes out wrapped hamburgers and boxed slices of pizza out.
"You brought fast food!" Jungkook exclaims excitedly. He used to love this junk. Whenever Yesung had some spare change, he'd take Jungkook out as a treat.
"I figured you might enjoy this." Jimin hands him a glass with Cola poured in it. "This is not exactly my ideal food. If anything, I would have preferred to cook for you or something, but since I had no idea when and if the date would happen, I thought it'll be too strange to make anything ahead."
"I had no idea you can cook." Jungkook adores the peaceful atmosphere, the quiet music playing in the otherwise silent roof.
"I had to live on my own when I was young, I guess I forced myself to learn." Jimin takes small sips from his drink. "Making food costs less on the long term than takeout."
"Wait, why?" Jungkook's stunned. "I thought you lived with your parents."
"I did. Well, when I was thirteen, they sort of kicked me out." Jimin admits.
"Was it because of the car incident?"
"That was part of the reason." Despite his smile, Jungkook knows this can't be a happy topic. Nonetheless, Jimin continued. "I wasn't going to school or doing anything productive."
"Still, you were their child." Jungkook scoots closer. "Isn't that harsh?"
"At the time it seemed logical but thinking about it now, I realize it wasn't right of them to do that to me." Jimin appreciates the sympathy. "The main reason for me not going to school afterwards was because I was working to earn money. I had some at home, it was enough to rent one of the cheapest apartments in town. It wasn't a friendly neighborhood and I was terrified every day." Jimin stares at the stars. "To be honest with you, the only reason I did go back to school one day was because I was incredibly lonely." Jungkook doesn't think, he decides to hug him. He's sad that someone as wonderful as Jimin had to go through something so hard and unfair. He kisses his cheek and waits for him to finish talking. "My parents didn't talk to me, my friends mostly forgot about me. No one besides some old and shady people at work spoke to me, I wasn't doing okay. I took the day off from work after a few months and went to school instead. Of course I had to come on a test day." Jimin chuckles bitterly. "The teacher was shocked. I think she thought I was dead. But the test... It was so easy, I remembered us studying it despite it being last year material. Because I aced it, she informed my parents about the sudden change and they decided to take me back home."
"I'm sorry." Jungkook bites his lower lip, taking a moment to collect his thoughts and decide what to say. He's not a professional at cheering people up but he makes an effort for the older male "But you're not alone anymore, right? You have people who adore you, like me."
"The past is something that will always haunt us." Jimin ruffles Jungkook's hair. "It's because we're humans that are alive at this very second, that we know we'll never be able to forget the things we've went through but you know, I think it was worth it. For me to get here, to be the CEO of Future Foundation, to have these friends, to be on this roof next to someone like you... For all of that, I'd live through those memories again."
"You're so brave." Jungkook says. "You walk your life facing forward, doing what you want. Unlike you, I regularly think about how I wish to go back. Back then, I took the orphanage for granted but when I left, I kept thinking I want to go back. I still do, sometimes."
Jimin finally hugs Jungkook back. "We've been through different events. I'm not any braver than you are if I'm able to do it again, it's not the same."
"And you're younger than me." Jimin pets his hair soothingly. "I've had my fair share of regrets and I'm slowly learning to live with everything. It's a process but I'm making it. That's why I know you can do it too. You're much stronger than you think you are."
"Hey," Jungkook mumbles after after a few minutes of silence. "Thanks for telling me more about yourself."
Jimin laughs. "It's funny. I never told anyone about that, I was ashamed but when I'm with you, I can be vulnerable."
"I feel the same." Jungkook cups the older male's cheeks. "I've never felt this with anyone. Is that odd?"
Jimin shakes his head, placing his hands on top of Jungkook's. "I'm glad to have met you." They share a small kiss.
"Your lips taste like cheese." Jungkook randomly states, causing both of them to go into a laughing fit.
The two spent the rest of their night talking mindlessly about everything and nothing. It might have been a tad too personal for a first date but considering they know each other for quite a while, sharing became much easier. Neither of them wanted the date to end so instead of using their cars, Jimin walked Jungkook home. "Did you enjoy our late night picnic?"
"I did." Jungkook stands near the building entrance door, refusing to go in yet. "I can't believe you planned something that sweet. Actually, scratch that. Of course you would."
Jimin raises an eyebrow at the statement. "What does that mean?"
"You're such a try hard, obviously you'd go overboard." Jungkook teases.
"You're saying that like it's a bad thing." Jimin moves closer, trapping Jungkook against the wall, right between his arms.
"It's cute." Jungkook mumbles. "That you do it for me."
"It's because I like you." Jimin says confidently. His lips barely graze Jungkook's and he brushes away the stray hair from the younger male's face, resting his hand on the latter's blushing face. "Thanks for going out with me, I had a great time."
"I had fun too." More determined, Jungkook leans in for a deeper kiss. He never realized how much he craved human contact until he felt it firsthand after a while. Somehow it became more heated than either of them expected with tongues rubbing and Jungkook letting out a soft whimper, trying to get used to the forgotten feeling. He's sober, he can't fake it until he makes it. He melts in Jimin's hold, tangling his fingers in his hair.
"God, you're adorable." Jimin says, breaking the kiss in order to compliment the younger male. He kisses Jungkook's neck, then retreats. "I should, uh, probably go home."
Jungkook clings onto him, panting needily. "Do you want to come over?"
Chapter 7: With You By My Side, I Feel So Fine
Jimin and Jungkook are awkward but cute
aye a new chapter
hope you enjoy it and sorry ahead for mistakes
comments are always very much appreciated
The tension was heavy in the air from the moment they've stepped inside the elevator in Jungkook's building. The door wasn't closed yet but Jungkook already had his arms around Jimin, his back flat against the mirror in the lift as the older male hushes his little mewls with kisses. The loud 'ding' signals they've arrived to the correct floor and with their hands intertwined, they make hast to Jungkook's apartment. Stumbling with the keys, the younger male somehow manages to unlock the entrance door, slamming it behind them as the pair rushes inside, smiling and giggling childishly. Leading Jimin inside his bedroom, Jungkook faces him with an unreadable expression. He grabs him by the neck, kissing Jimin's plump lips and he can only sigh, playing with the hair on his nape. They fall onto the bed, Jimin on top of Jungkook. They're staring at each other intensely, despite the want and need they're both hesitant. Jimin bites his lower lip, something Jungkook thought was incredibly attractive. "You're so pretty." He mumbles, kissing Jungkook's cheek.
"You're pretty too," Jungkook shyly compliments, cupping Jimin's face with both of his hands.
Jimin can't resist the smile spreading across his face. "You're not used to praising people, are you?"
"Shut up, I tried." Jungkook mumbles weakly, averting his gaze, albeit glancing at the older male sideways.
"And I appreciate it." Jimin laughs. "Anything you say is cute anyway, I don't mind if you don't try your hardest to flatter me."
Jungkook raises an eyebrow. "What if I said I killed hundreds of people?"
"An angel like you?" Jimin questions, but Jungkook can't tell if he's sarcastic or sincere. He probably doesn't know either. "I doubt it."
"I'm no angel," Jungkook pouts, proving Jimin's point of him being cute.
"Oh?" Jimin grins. "You do this often?"
"Well, no, never."
"Never?" Jimin is surprised.
"Well, once, I think." Jungkook becomes hotter.
"You think?" Jimin is confused.
"It was once, really." The younger male confirms his odd rambling.
"When was it?"
"Um, well," Jungkook bites the insides of his mouth, recalling everything. "When I was thirteen."
"Jungkook, you don't have to do this." Yesung was holding back his tears, because his younger friend shouldn't see his sadness right now. "Tell them you don't want to go, okay? I'll go. Please, it's too dangerous."
"How do you think I feel, hyung?" Jungkook turns to him, stopping his walking around. The guy told him to get ready because they're leaving at midnight. Truthfully Jungkook didn't have any personal belongings besides a long necklace that he had always worn. It was a gift from his mom, the day before she was killed. Since then, he never took it off. "I can't let you go anyway, I won't make it on my own here."
"And you'll make it on your own while training as an assassin?" Yesung raises his voice. Jungkook signals him to tone it down. "Sorry, I didn't mean to yell, I just - Why did you have to eavesdrop? To barge in?"
"Yesung, stop it!" Jungkook's the one to shout this time. "For once, let me do something for you. Please. I can't imagine how terrible it is there, I can't understand any of it and I know it's going to make me want to die but it's better me than you."
"What are you saying?" The shorter male reaches for Jungkook's hand, inching towards him.
"You have a future. You're smart, kind, sweet, everyone loves you." Jungkook tries to fight the wetness in his eyes. "You mean so much to me and knowing that thanks to me, you avoided that fate, that you lived, that's all I need to keep going for a year."
"But Jungkook, you also have a future. You're talented, incredible and maybe you're somewhat a-social but that doesn't change the fact you can be so pure and loving." Yesung pulls him in, his grip extremely tight, almost as if he's scared that when he lets go, Jungkook won't be here anymore.
"It's only a year of training, then I can come back to visit you, okay?" Jungkook's the first to cry. "I'm doing this because I love you hyung. I love you so much, that's why I have to go." There's a long moment of silence and Jungkook wonders if he really should have revealed his true feelings. "Sorry, I-"
Yesung stops his future babble with his lips, planting a soft kiss on them. "I love you too."
After this statement, Jungkook's a wreck. He almost fell to his knees but Yesung held him close. So close that he almost couldn't breathe but it felt good to be held, he felt like he was finally where he belonged. He kissed him again. And again. And again, endlessly, somehow forgetting what air is. "Please love me." He cries loudly, pleading for more memories.
"I love you Jungkookie, I love you." Yesung whispered, picking him up and placing him on the bed as gently as possible. He kisses Jungkook's face all over, causing his best friend to laugh fondly through his tears.
Jungkook's hands wrap around Yesung's waist as he drags them up his back, hugging him. "I don't know how I'll do it, I don't know anything except that... you're my world." He sniffles. "And I love you. I need you to be here, waiting for me. Okay?"
Yesung fought himself very hard but a single tear fell, hitting Jungkook's lips. "Okay, anything for my favorite person. I'll keep working to get you that promised ring."
"I knew I could count on you." Jungkook's hands move to wrap around Yesung's neck, pulling him in for another kiss. And another, until they both feel it. The heat, the want, everything was so intense at the news of Jungkook leaving. Feelings that shouldn't have turned physical this early - were fulfilled.
"You were so young." Jimin's surprised. Then he notices how pale the younger male suddenly is. "Are you okay? You don't look too great."
"Yeah... Yeah, I'm..." Jungkook coughs awkwardly, sitting up. Getting the hint, the older male sits up as well. "I'm sorry." He massages his temples, feeling a forming headache.
"You've got no reason to feel sorry." Jimin doesn't want to invade his personal space. "Can I hug you? You seem to need emotional support."
"Go for it." Jungkook manages to stutter out before bursting into tears. Jimin's warm and loving, stroking his hair to help him calm down. Slowly, his heartbeat steadies and his breathing returns to normal. "I really should stop crying in front of you." He bitterly says, feeling Jimin's body heaving as he laughs.
"It makes me feel like you trust me enough to show your sensitive side." Jimin sounds a little proud.
"Don't boast about it right in front of me." Jungkook laughs anyway, hugging him in return.
"I'm sorry, didn't mean to." Jimin kisses his hair. "Do you want water? Food? Anything?"
"Can you bring me tissues and water?" Jungkook asks in a quiet voice, reluctant to let go of the older male but wanting to at least fix how broken he looks.
"Got it." Jimin ruffles his hair and when he leaves the room, Jungkook has a few seconds to think. He tries his best to not freak out considering he was almost about to have sex with Jimin but he can't seem to think properly, Yesung occupying his mind quite a lot. In its own way, it feels like he's betraying his best friend, his first love, the closest thing to family. He knows he shouldn't feel this way. Yesung is gone, he can't reach his hand and grab him, can't even hope he could like he used to do when he passed out after harsh training. There were remnants of despair inside of him that he couldn't get rid off and he didn't want to take it out on Jimin. "Here you go." The older male takes him out of his trance.
"Oh, thanks." He grabs the tissue first, wiping the tears away and blowing his nose. He drinks the water and notices the older male staring at him with somewhat of an adoring smile. "W-What?"
"Nothing, you look cute when you drink." Jimin sits besides him. "But in all reality, I thought to myself that we've become quite close, haven't we?" Jungkook nods. "It just makes me happy." His sincere expression gets to the younger male who blushes at the words.
"You say the most random things sometimes." Jungkook stammers, placing the water bottle on his dresser. "But... I like it too." He holds Jimin's smaller hands, intertwining it with his, giving him a gentle peck. "It's been years since I've had someone close to me, I don't think I'll get used to it that easily."
"I'm not asking you to do that." Jimin assures him. "I suppose I don't know how to say it but you mean a lot to me, is all. I hope that doesn't put too much pressure on you, I just want to make you feel as good as I do when we're together."
Jungkook's heart rate is crazy. It's weird how a few words from Jimin make him forget the awkward situation they were in only a minute ago. It makes him realize you can't betray a dead man. He loved Yesung, he really did. He was a ray of hope in the darkness but it couldn't last forever. There's nothing wrong with focusing on this moment right now, with Jimin. "It's nice having you here." He rests his head on the older male's shoulder.
"Do you want me to stay? I can take care of you." Jimin suggests. "I can make you something to eat that isn't trash covered in oil."
"We'll have to reschedule that promised dinner." Jungkook says, a bit unwillingly, but he's got to get it together. Besides, he doesn't think he can take the implications of having Jimin on his bed for that long. He knows the former meant staying in an innocent way but Jungkook is too embarrassed after what happened. "Besides, it's... late. I want you to be able to get up early for work tomorrow."
"Alright." He kisses Jungkook's cheek. "Call me if you need anything, okay? Or if you just feel like talking."
"Will do." Jungkook sends him off, waving. When he hears the door close, he covers his fave with a pillow and squeals. Even after learning so much about how to kill people, he wonders if it's possible to suffocate himself with a pillow. He decides to be a bit more brave and takes his cellphone out, calling Jimin.
"Hey," The response is almost immediate. "What's up? Is something the matter?"
"Um, no, nothing is, in fact, the matter." Jungkook face palms. "You said that if I want to talk, I can call."
"I did." Jimin chuckles. "Didn't think I'll get a call the second I step out though."
"Sorry, do you want me to hang up?"
"No, not at all. I'm excited to listen to your voice on my way home." Jimin sounds so genuine that it melts the younger male's heart.
"Is it cold out? You don't have a coat or a jacket on." Jungkook worriedly asks. It was relatively chill when they were outside but they were pressed to one another and it was earlier.
"I've got my blazer, no worries." Jimin says, hearing a sigh of relief in return. "I only live around fifteen minutes away, you know that."
"I know! But still, I don't want you to catch a cold." Jungkook pouts to himself.
"I'll hurry up then." And Jimin really does. Jungkook can notice his quick footsteps through the phone. "How are you feeling?"
"I'm okay, tired, embarrassed, not any different." Jungkook giggles when he hears the older male laughing a little. "How are you? I feel as though I don't ask you enough." Jungkook's not good at human interactions, he simply mimics the kind acts Jimin shows him.
"To be honest, I felt a bit weird opening up to you." The older male disclosed. "But feeling like you were there for me, supporting me, that was nice. It's a pleasant feeling. To think that my problems matter to someone, that is."
"It's not just your problems." A wave of confidence washes over Jungkook. "You matter." Jimin's taken aback, silent for a few a seconds. "Sorry, I didn't mean to be that expressive in a way that will make you uncomfortable."
"No, it's okay." You could practically hear Jimin's smile in his tone. "Coming from you, that means a lot." Jungkook's usually amateurish when it comes to keeping the conversation going but with Jimin, it was extremely easy to talk about anything. Their chatter continued when the older male reached home.
Two and a half hours into the call, Jungkook's the first one to comment about it. "Maybe we should go to sleep."
"Already sick of me, huh?" Jimin teases. "But yeah, I agree. I just don't feel sleepy whenever we talk."
"Do you want me to lull you to bed?" Jungkook was joking but Jimin took this remark very seriously.
"Yes. Sing for me."
"What? I was jo-"
"You asked, I want to listen." Jimin insists.
"I'm not a good singer or anything, I'll yell horribly into your ears and then you won't want to sleep at all." Jungkook is insecure.
"Not up to the challenge?" Jimin snickers with that condescending tone.
"Not this psychology thing again." Jungkook groans childishly. "Fine! I'll sing! You're happy?"
Jimin hums. "Very. What will you sing?"
"A song from the orphanage." Jungkook clears his throat. "It's been years since I did that so bear with me."
"It's okay, I'll love it anyway."
Jungkook closes his eyes, trying to gain some confidence by listening to Jimin's steady breathing. "The mood is good and the melody is nice. Again I will close my eyes. I don't have to see anymore - If I feel happy it's fine." God, Jungkook can't believe he still remembers the words. "Oh how beautiful are the stars, let's admire every single one! I won't take the beauty away but I, I'll keep them close to my heart. This feeling I feel, it's so strong, but this happiness is not my own, I will share it with everyone I love."
"That's a lot cuter than I had expected." Jimin sounded content. "Your voice is so smooth, it's like honey."
"Are you satisfied now?"
"Indeed. I'll go to sleep." Jimin stifles a chortle. "Thank you for singing, good night and sweet dreams."
Two weeks went by in a blur. Jungkook and Jimin would work until late, go on small dates and then talk on the phone for a few hours, with Jungkook lulling his hyung to sleep every night. Jimin would always walk the taller male home, kiss him softly at the door and leave. It was sweet and polite. It was also lame considering you can say they're almost going steady. Then again, the previous time they tried anything, Jungkook burst into tears. He can't exactly blame the older mal for being careful.
"Jungkook, it's lunch time." Taehyung announces, breaking Jungkook's focus.
The younger male is confused. "Already? I thought I arrived only five minutes ago."
"Man, Jimin has invading your mind way too much." The slightly taller male exhales. "Come on, don't you want to sit next to him?"
Jungkook gets up, waits for Jimin instead of heading to the restaurant with everyone, greeting him with a shy hug. "Good morning." Jimin kisses his cheek.
"Good morning, how'd you sleep?" Jungkook pulls away, blushing.
"Pretty great, I had someone with a great voice sing to me this night."
"Again? Geez, you surely demand a lot from that person." Jungkook taunts.
"Only because I know he'll relent." Jimin moves his hand away from the younger male's slim waist when they arrive to the table. They have to keep it professional in front of everyone. Under the table, they hold hands.
"Listen I don't care what people say, Lion King is the best movie ever." Jaekyung declares.
"I've never seen it." Jungkook says. Everyone at the table gasp.
"I've never gotten the chance." Jungkook is baffled as to why they're shocked. "Is it really such a big deal?" Every single person at the table nods.
"Well, if you want, you can come over tomorrow and we can watch it together." Jimin invites him. "It's Saturday so we'll be free, unless you have other plans."
"No, I'm-I'm free."
"Great. On that note, I can cook you something as well."
These are clothes. Fabric. Nothing more, nothing less. And yet, Jungkook seemed to be having the hardest time of his life to decide on what to wear to Jimin's place. He wants to try going a bit further than kissing. They're going to be alone in the older male's apartment. Who knows, right? The thing is, Jungkook knows. Knows Jimin won't try anything. Considering he traumatized him last time by bawling his eyes, he can't quite get angry that things are moving slowly. He was desperate to the point he talked to Taehyung about it after lunch. "Boy, that's some heavy stuff." His co-worker laughed. "I say - try to lean a little more into him during the movie, kiss him, get on his lap or something. My suggestion is to not be subtle. Jimin's smart but can be oblivious, especially if he wants to be."
Jungkook settled on casual clothes, driving to Jimin's place at around seven pm. From outside, he can smell food. He knocks. Swiftly the door opens and the older male tells him to come in. "Did you make everything?" On the table there are quite a lot of Korean dishes that smell tempting.
"Yeah, hope you'll like it. C'mon, let's eat."
The food was great. Jungkook liked the soup best. They moved to the couch to see the movie. Jimin pressed play and moved to cuddle the younger male. A little bit intimacy. That's good. Jungkook wraps a hand around his shoulder, resting his head on it. The animation was cute, the story seemed interesting in a way that wasn't fitting to cartoonish animals. It reminded him of Hamlet. He placed his legs on Jimin's lap, checking his expression for anything that might imply he's against it but the latter seemed really into the movie. Slowly, Jungkook moved to sit on his lap instead. No response. He bites his own lower lip, moving so that he straddles Jimin's thighs. The younger male bites Jimin's earlobe. "Are you ignoring me?"
"Well, it's getting harder to do that."
"Why?" Jungkook knows the answer but asks anyway, wrapping his hands around his neck. "I thought you like me."
"I do." He grabs Jungkook's hips. "God, I really do. That's why I don't want to mess up."
"I know the first attempt went a bit... overboard and I'm sorry-"
"No, Jungkook, you don't need to apologize." Jimin kisses his lips. "Those feelings you're trying so hard to convey through your struggles mean a lot more than you think."
"I know but... you ignoring me like that, it makes me feel as if I'm not as desired. And I know I can't get mad at you for that, if anything I'm upset with myself."
"Jungkook, all the hurt, the trauma, the memories, they're not going to just disappear and that's why I want us to progress at a pace that you're comfortable with." Jimin presses a gentle kiss to Jungkook's forehead, watching as red coats his face. "I want to be respectful to you and do it whenever you feel ready enough to tell me."
"You're such a nice guy." Jungkook grumbles. "I like it a lot about you."
"I like you."
"Don't say that so casually, it's annoying." Jungkook sulks.
"Oh I'm sorry, let me bring a rose and serenade to you on my knees." Jimin sneers.
"That's more like it." Jungkook leans closer to whisper in his ear. "I want you to wreck me now."
"God, sometimes you're such a brat." Jimin murmurs, kissing Jungkook's cheek all over.
Jungkook was flustered to the bone, blood pumping to his face to dye it in red as he managed to mutter: "And you love it." before Jimin snapped, squeezing his ass and picking him up, carrying him to the bedroom.