Mycroft slowly opened his eyes. His hand reaches the other side of the bed and it’s empty as it supposed to be. He just sighed and rested his head on the headboard while scanning the room. His bedroom still full of the “after sex” air, and he noticed that his baby brother’s clothes still scattered around the room.
He just smiles while trying to remember what happened before he passed out. He had a bad day at the office and need something to distract his mind that stronger than whiskey at the Diogenes. Then Sherlock knocked on his door in the evening.
It had been a fast and rough sex. No kissing, no cuddles, no sweet words, nothing. It was purely sex from the beginning. It all started from like 15 years ago, after the drugs incident. Sherlock needed something to makes his mind quiet besides the drugs and Mycroft offered him the option.
“Maybe you just need sex.”
“Sex? With what? A Human? Do you think there’s someone out there who’s capable enough to touch me without making me disgusted?!”
Mycroft just looks into his eyes and raised his eyebrows then look away as the answer. Sherlock’s eyes widened at the thought but he doesn’t object. At first, all of this is for Sherlock, but soon after that Mycroft become addicted as well. Mycroft is no virgin and had sex with many escorts but sex with someone he’s physically comfortable with is something different.
And that’s all for 15 years. Pure sex without any emotion included. Sherlock would show up at his house, get fucked and then leave. Sometimes after Mycroft fuck him mercilessly he would become overtired and stay in bed, sleep side by side without touching each other. And the next day Mycroft would drop by at Baker Street to give him a case and they would bicker with each other like they used to.
Mycroft realized he loves his baby brother in many ways for a long time. He loves him as a protective big brother, he loves him as a family, and deep down he desired him. But he knows that Sherlock won’t received it. He’s aware that Sherlock knows that he loves him, but he just can’t accept it. Because they both know if Sherlock accepts his love there is no way back. They could care less about physical engagement but not for emotion. To cross the emotional barrier and showing emotional side is something as hard as kill each other.
Mycroft sniffed and he noticed the smell of cigarette comes from the balcony. It’s rare that Sherlock still wants to stay when his leg still could support him to stand. Then Mycroft gets up and wear his night robe and walk to the balcony and wants to join the smoking party. But his legs stopped walking on his way. He just saw the back of naked Sherlock, his baby brother, standing there while smoking the cigarette showered by the moonlight.
That perfect body and curly hair are just too much. There are no words to describe how beautiful his baby brother is right now. And there are so many feelings inside Mycroft chest wanted to burst out. The feel of love, desired, possessiveness, and much more. He wanted to embrace that body, to claim him as his, and kiss him deeply. To share his love and the needs to be loved back is so strong. He never knows that he would capable of this emotion. To feel love and wanted to be loved.
Mycroft the Icemen, wanted to be loved? Don’t be silly. Well, that’s what his brain said, but his heart screaming for it again and again. He wants Sherlock to completely become his. He wants to pour all the love he has and to be accepted as well.
Mycroft could be the most genius and brilliant human being in England right now but he’s helpless about love and any lovesick teenager could beat him in no time. He doesn't know what to say to his baby brother. Should he say I love you Sherlock, please be mine and become a lover in a completely incestuous way? Sherlock, would you be my husband and we could crush Mummy and Father’s life?
And for the first time, Mycroft Holmes act upon his instinct and ignore all his rational mind.
Sherlock smokes his cigarette and inhales deeply. Usually, he would leave right after he finished clean up himself in Mycroft huge bathroom. But tonight when he gets out of the bathroom and collected his clothes, he just stared at Mycroft sleeping. He stands beside Mycroft bed for some minutes, just to look at his big brothers closely.
He wants it. He wanted to caress those face and kiss those lips. He wanted to stay close and listen to Mycroft’s heartbeat. But he doesn't know how. He knows that Mycroft loves him as much as he did. And he knows they try their best to suppress their feeling as hard as they could. So then he walks into the balcony and just hopes for the best.
He’s aware that Mycroft is staring at his back for great 15 minutes. His heart drumming while his mind tries to anticipating what will comes next. Never in 15 years in the night after sex, they talk to each other. Sherlock would simply go without saying anything. And they would interact as normal brother the next day. Would Mycroft tell him to go? Maybe. Yeah, Mycroft would just tell him to go and don’t act so childish with being naked around the house.
He’s become tenser when Mycroft’s footsteps getting near. He tries so hard to calm down and convince himself that he is overreacting. He just drops his cigarette butts and stomped it carelessly. He just thought about running away when he feels Mycroft hands on hips and move to his chest while his back pressed against his body. It needs 5 seconds to bring Sherlock back to his senses and realized what is happening.
Mycroft, his overly protective big brother, the Icemen that could fuck him senseless without any signs of emotion and always under control embracing him right at the moment.
“Mycroft-“ He tries to talk but then his mind froze while his brother strong hands and long fingers touch his chin and move his head so they could see face to face. Those icy blue eyes staring at his own eyes deeply and full of emotion. Full...of love. Sherlock can’t say anything. His brother’s eyes just tore his soul.
Then it happens. Their lips meet and melting together. All those suppressed feeling from being inside each other since 15 years all pouring down. The dam already broke. This is literally Sherlock’s first kiss so he just stands still and tries to open his mouth without trying too much besides his brain still processing all of this things. But Mycroft as the good brother is the one who takes control, just like they used to. Mycroft tries to capture Sherlock’s mouth, taste each upper and lower lips, and touch his tongue.
I love you
I love you
It keeps playing on his mind but he couldn’t say it. So he tries his best to pour his love through the kiss.
As lame as it sounds, Sherlock feels the butterfly inside his stomach. He accepted the love from his big brother and give his love as well. He feels so warm and all the tense from his shoulder just fading away. After maneuvering in some way now they standing face to face and Sherlock try to kiss him back. And he realized they both become hard down there.
Mycroft keeps kissing his brother senseless and ignores the hardness of his dick. He just wants to kiss Sherlock forever for now. Forever and never stop. If this is the way he could show his love towards Sherlock then he won’t stop.
Sherlock on the other hand just can’t stand it anymore. The feeling just too much. He never feels something this strong and he doesn't know what to do. His head becomes so light and his legs become jelly. He tries to get off from the hungry kisses and look into Mycroft eyes deeply. And then he says it, with the voice full of the unexplainable needs.
“Make love to me, brother mine.”
The first time since 15 years Mycroft hold his brother with such love. He kisses every part of his body with emotion, not just some animalistic urge. And Sherlock received it wholeheartedly.
When Mycroft on top of him and entered him slowly, he can’t hold his voice any longer. He moaned so loudly and let go all his feeling. He feels every thrust and his moan become louder and louder. He just loses control of his own body. He trusts Mycroft to take care of him completely. Until the time he’s getting close and he meets his brother’s gaze. He can’t stop it. He feels wonderful. Maybe this is what it feels like to be loved. And he can’t help it when tears streaming down from his eyes while his dick throbbing hard and the cum splashing on his stomach. Mycroft just licks his tears and come hard.
They both stay in that position, unable to move. Sherlock still crying and he keeps whispering in his brother’s ears “I love you.” And Mycroft buried his face in Sherlock’s neck and do the same. And then he joins the silent crying. Nothing beats the feeling of being in love and being loved.
The next day,
Mycroft drop by at Baker Street. There’s John on the sofa, typing on his laptop. And then his baby brother on his favorite chair with his violin.
“How’s the diet, brother mine?”
They know they can’t become a lover outside the bedroom door, they know things won’t change between them as a brother. They still Mycroft Holmes the Icemen and Sherlock Holmes the Consultant Detective. They still the child of Mummy and Father who’s trying their best to become the smart one. But deep down they know that their love is touch each other souls, truly madly and deeply.