Chapter 1: The Plan™
Stanley Uris, Stan to his friends, was never one to cause problems or hurt anyone, on purpose at least. But he had had a fair share of Henry Bowers and his gang's unwanted attention during the years he had gone to the same school with them. One day something snapped in his head, not in the psychopath kind of way but the 'I want to get revenge' kind of way.
It all started when Stan came raging through the door to Bill's room. "I am so done with Henry Bowers and his bullshit." Bill looked shocked, Stan usually never swore. He was soft and pure- oh shit, his gay was showing. His breath hitched when he thought that.
Richie and Eddie were on the floor, Eddie in the former’s lap, playing with his boyfriend’s fingers. Richie looked excited to hear what happened, his mouth in a big grin and eyes wide open behind his coke-bottle glasses. Eddie rolled his eyes, “Who isn’t? That bitch.” Richie squeezed Eddie’s hand, “look at my boy, calling Henry Bowers a bitch,” he whispered in his ear.
"What d-did he do this t-time?" Bill got up from his bed and took Stan's backpack from him and put it on the side, ”sit down and tell us everything.” Stan looked at Bill and nodded, ”okay.” Before he started telling the boys about Henry, he noticed Eddie whispering something to Richie and Richie looking between Stan and Bill and he felt uncomfortable.
”… then he just grabbed me and pushed me against the wall and Patrick and Victor took my backpack and threw all my papers around the floor. I’m just sick of it, you know?” Bill noticed there was a hint of sadness in his voice, the rest of it was the usual, annoyance.
“We gotta beat the shit out of him, you know that?” Richie was the first one to speak up. Stan sighed, “and how exactly are you going to beat up a guy who is much bigger and stronger than you?” Bill nodded and smiled at Stan, “e-exactly, there is no way we can d-do that.”
“Besides, I’ve already got an idea. We have to mess up everything he does. We have to find a way to mess with him and the others.” The expression on Richie’s face quickly turned from understanding to dumbfounded. It was now his turn to be shocked. “Who are you? What did you to Stanley Uris? Because that sounds like a plan!” he exclaimed.
Stan laughed and the rest joined in. Eddie kissed Richie on his cheek and stood up. “I’m going to get snacks. Bill, I know you have cookies in your kitchen. Can I take them?”
“Sure,” he said quietly. “I’m coming with you,” Stan said and stood up. Eddie and Stan left the room to look for the cookies.
“Dude, you have to stop pining after him and ask him out!” Richie blurted out. “Rich, not so loud, you- you dumb ass.” Bill’s facial expression told the curly haired boy that he wasn’t going to do that anytime soon. “I’m tired of watching you two pine after each other, just do it already. That’s what you told me before I told Eds I love him.”
“Th-this is different! I-I don’t know what I’m do-doing. You had had pr-practice before, with- with girls. I’ve never been with so-someone.” Richie stood up from the ground and sat down on the bed next to Bill. “Listen, Big Bill, he’s head over heels for you. He will jump right into your arms when you tell him how you feel.”
In this moment, Bill thought, who knew Richie could actually be so nice and know about feelings, especially love, this much. “Tha-thank you, Richie. I will figure out a- a way to tell him.”
In the kitchen Eddie was rummaging the cabinets in search for cookies. “Eddie, calm down. The cookies aren’t that important.” Stan looked at the mess Eddie made, “Now I have to clean this up. You have no idea how many times I’ve cleaned up after Bill. He’s a walking mess.”
“Oh, so you’re in love with you best friend, you’ve hung out with him, alone, so many times you’ve lost count, he’s in love with you too… what are you waiting for, Stan?” Stan looked at Eddie and gave him his best death glare.
“Don’t try me, Edward,” he moved to the cabinet and started organising it.
“Here you go,” he picked up a package of chocolate chip cookies and handed them to the other boy. Eddie thanked him and took a bowl from a shelf and put the contents of the cookie package in it.
Stan stopped Eddie from doing anything and grabbed his shoulders. “What did you whisper to Richie?” he questioned. The dark haired boy just smirked and left the kitchen, “Come on, Stanley, we need to get back to our favourite boys or else they’ll start wondering what’s taking us so long.”
Stan sighed to himself and followed him. He couldn’t let go of what Eddie and Richie had been whispering about. It was obviously something about them because of the way Eddie’s coke- bottle glasses wearing boyfriend had looked at them.
Maybe Eddie had said something about his crush on Bill and Richie knew he didn’t have a chance with him. Maybe he knew something about Bill Stan didn’t. What if Bill had a crush on someone? He would never be able to get over it.
Later that night Bill invited the rest of the Losers to his house to come up with a plan to get back at Henry.
Mike and Ben arrived a few minutes before Beverly did. “Mike! Hi!” Georgie opened the door and slung himself to Mike. “Hello, buddy, how are you?” Georgie smiled as bright as ever, “I’m fine!” Mike grinned back at him, “that’s good to hear.” After chatting with Bill and Georgie’s parents and welcoming Beverly there too, they went to Bill’s room.
“The queen has arrived, hello everyone,” Mike greeted everyone, waving his hand. “Yes, thank you for presenting me, I appreciate it,” a certain red headed girl thanked one of her best friends. Mike faked a frown and brought his hand to his chest, “I’m so offended.”
“She’s not wrong, you know.” Everyone turned to look at Ben. “Your heart eyes are showing, Ben,” Richie commented from where he was sitting behind Eddie, holding him like he had done earlier. Ben flicked his middle finger at him.
“Alright guys! We need to think about ways we can mess with the Bowers gang.” Everyone went silent and soon enough Bill came up with an amazing idea.
“What- what if we could t-turn the others a-against Henry?” Stan’s face lit up and he hugged Bill, “that’s such a good idea!” he said against the other boy’s neck. The others pretended they saw nothing, except for Richie, who stared at them knowingly. Bill shot him a dangerous look that said ‘you will regret this later’.
They came up with a plan: they would start with Patrick, since he had the most brain cells left up in his head compared to Victor and Belch. Then they would turn Victor against Henry and at last, Belch. He was going to be the most difficult one to convince. He was Henry’s most loyal friend.
Chapter 2: Putting The Plan™ into action
The losers are working on convincing Patrick to discard Henry. Richie and Eddie are having trouble in paradise and Mike is helps them. Stan's self-esteem is hanging pretty low and his crush on Bill doesn't help at all.
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Stan was walking through the hallway towards maths class where Bill was already waiting for him. He smiled at the curly haired boy when he arrived and sat down. They locked their eyes for a moment and Stan felt like he could die right in that place. He felt his cheeks warming up under Bill’s gaze.
”He- hey,” Bill stuttered out. Stan couldn’t tell if Bill was stuttering because he was nervous or not. “Hi, how are you?” he asked, taking in Bill’s features. His blue eyes that always had kindness in them, his jawline so sharp he would probably cut his finger if he touched it.
Bill opened his mouth but before he could say anything Mrs. Smith shushed the class. “I’m fine, is everything okay with you?” Bill whispered as quietly as he could. Stan nodded, “everything’s alright.” Stan half listened to Mrs. Smith and half dreamt about the boy sitting next to him.
While Bill and Stan were in maths, Richie was at the Barrens, skipping first period. He was sitting on a rock when his phone made a sound that informed him he got a message on WhatsApp. He took his phone from the pocket of his jeans. It was from Eddie, asking where he was. He didn’t answer.
Richie looked around and stood up. He took a cigarette from his pocket and a lighter from the other. Then he lit the cigarette and inhaled the smoke. Then he exhaled and rolled his eyes when he heard his phone go off again, this time someone (probably Eddie) was calling him.
“What, Eddie? What do you have to talk about so bad you can’t wait for me to get to school?” he snapped at his boyfriend. Eddie sounded taken a back, “well, sorry,” he started, “I just wanted to know if you were coming to school today or not. You know I had to ask the teacher if I could go to the bathroom so I could call you, right? And because of that, I had to actually go to the bathroom so I wouldn’t get caught. And I am pretty fucking sure you know how much I hate going to the public fucking bathroom.”
At the end, he sounded furious. He was, he had waited for Richie to show up in biology but he never did. Then he had had to go to the bathroom so nobody saw him in the hallway talking to Richie.
He hated going in them because there were all sorts of germs and bacteria. Who knows what he could catch there! He had never gone to a public toilet to do what most people did in there, to pee.
He had used the school’s bathroom a couple of time when Richie had grabbed his hand when they passed it. Once they were in there he had started ranting about all the deceases they could get from those dirty taps or toilet seats.
Richie had silenced him by giving him a peck on his lips. Then he had started peppering his face with kisses and slowly moved to his neck, where he knew Eddie was sensitive. “Stop, Richie,” he tried. “Nuh-uh, I don’t think I will, you’re so darn cute, Eds.” He blushed, his cheeks gaining colour like crazy.
Eddie wasn’t as fond of Richie at the moment as he was back then. “Well, yes. I am coming to school, now you know.” Richie’s voice sounded like he couldn’t care less about school.
Eddie was worried about him. He had started distancing himself from the group a couple of days ago. After they came up with the plan to fight Bowers’ gang.
“Richie,” the smaller boy stretched out the e, “I want you to be honest with me, is everything okay with you at home?” He heard his boyfriend’s breath hitch at the other end. He knew what that meant right away. “Richie, baby. Are you at the Barrens?” The line went dead.
He started thinking, he couldn’t leave the school now. Not during the class.
Mike had a free period, right? He tried calling him. The first try, he got nothing. The second time, Mike answered. “Eddie boy, what now, shouldn’t you be in class?” Mike’s voice rung through the phone.
“Mike, I think Richie needs help.” You could hear Mike gasp from the other side of the phone. “The Barrens,” Eddie said and ended the call. Now he had to go back to class and get back to biology. Needless to say he couldn’t focus on anything else but Richie.
Bill and Stan left maths after the bell rang and Mrs. Smith finished talking. A few students had left before she finished and she threatened to give them attention. Neither Stan or Bill wanted to risk it.
Once they reached biology class, Eddie was already in the hallway waiting for them. “I think Richie is in some kind of trouble. Mike went to the Barrens to help him but I just can’t think of anything else. What if something bad happened?”
Before any of them could do anything, Patrick was in their faces. “What are you losers up to? Something gay?” Stan winced, quite noticeably one might add. “Oh. Did I hit a sensitive spot?” Henry was behind him. “Of course you did, they’re all fags,” Henry spat.
Stan could feel tears in the corners of his eyes. Bill noticed his distress and looked at him in a comforting way. Except in this situation it wasn’t comforting at all. It actually made him feel even worse because he was the reason behind Stan’s tears.
Ben and Beverly appeared in the distance and Bill gave them a look that said ‘just leave’ but they didn’t. If their friends needed them, they would go and help them.
“Look at what we have here, more losers.” Henry’s voice was cold and didn’t have any sympathy in it. Eddie was terrified. He would do anything to be at the Barrens with Richie and Mike. Even though there were some problems between them.
Beverly looked at Henry and shot him her best death stare while holding Ben’s hand, “honestly, Henry, you should just quit fucking with us. We’re not afraid of you,” Henry chuckled and looked at Eddie and Stan who were standing close to each other with Bill on Stan’s other side, his hand barely touching Stan’s to calm him down, “we don’t care what you think of us. It doesn’t affect our lives in the slightest and never will.” Beverly looked proud of herself, trying not to show it to Henry and his friends.
“Besides, shouldn’t you be trying to act nicer, you’re grounded? I heard you beat up someone so bad they actually had to go to the hospital? I think somebody told me it was Patrick who started this rumour,” she put her fingers on her chin as if she was really trying to think remember it.
Henry was infuriated. His face was red and he clenched his hands. Then he looked at Patrick and walked towards him. The other bully looked shocked, to say at least. His eyes were wide and he looked ready to run away from the scene. Now Beverly didn’t bother trying to hide her pride. She had done something she never believed was possible.
“Get out of my eyes! You dumb fuck, why the hell would you tell that to anyone? It isn’t anyone’s but my business.” Patrick looked petrified of Henry and he started to back off slowly. Then he turned around and ran away.
Ben spoke up, “I think you just lost one of your minions?” It took about .2 seconds for Henry to react to that and he was pushing Ben against the lockers, punching him. Beverly hit Henry’s back but he didn’t give her any attention. All his anger was channelled towards Ben now.
“Let go of my boyfriend, you psycho!” He didn’t stop punching until a teacher was there, pulling him away from Ben. Beverly kneeled down to wipe blood off of Ben’s upper lip and the look she had on her face was miserable to watch. Ben took her hand and mouthed ‘I’m fine’ to her. She nodded.
Stan was grasping Bill’s hand at this point and had a single tear rolling down his cheek. Bill turned to him and widened his eyes. “Hey, it- it’s fine. Don- Don’t wo-worry,” and wiped the tear from the other boy’s cheek. Stan looked in Bill’s eyes and all he could see was pity. “I’m fine,” he squeaked.
Eddie was talking to the teacher, Mr. Sawyer, about what just happened. “Yeah, he punched Ben multiple times,” his voice was small and careful. Almost like Henry was there listening to him and making sure he didn’t tell them anything.
Eddie and Stan were on their way to Richie’s house. Ben had been cleaned up and the principal gave them a permission to go home if they felt like they needed that. Ben and Beverly left to go to his house. Bill decided he would stay at school. Looking out for Patrick and what he did.
He had given Stan a hug before he left. A hug that had lasted longer than one between best friends would usually but Stan was too oblivious to notice such thing. He had hugged him back and turned away to walk towards the doors. For the last time he turned his head back at Bill’s direction and to his surprise, Bill was already looking at him. In less than a second he turned his head back to Eddie, “what just happened?”
And now Eddie and Stan were cycling to Richie’s. Mike was already there. Richie had told him everything about why he had been ignoring the others and why he distanced himself from them.
“You need to tell this to Eddie, he’s like, super worried. I’ve never heard him speak like that about anyone.” Mike was understanding, he often used to feel like he was nothing, worthless waste of oxygen. Now his self-esteem was a little better.
Richie nodded. Something the losers did often when they didn’t know what to say. Now the next thing Richie did was the unexpected to himself and Mike. He hugged Mike and thanked him. He didn’t show his love or appreciation towards his friends very frequently but when he did, it meant everything to him and his friends.
Richie opened the door for Eddie and Stan. Immediately when Eddie was done with taking his shoes off and placing his bag on the floor. He walked up to Richie and wrapped his arms around his neck. “I was so worried.” Richie apologised what felt like a million times. Stan looked at them and thought about Bill. Hopefully they would have that someday.
The thing is, he didn’t have much hope when it came to that. He dreamt about being together with Bill but didn’t believe they would end up together, ever.
He took off his shoes and went to Richie’s room, where Mike was waiting for the three boys to arrive. “Hiya, Stanny.” Stan greeted him and went to the bean bag that lay in the corner of Richie’s room next to his wardrobe. Mike could tell there was something on his mind but didn’t question him.
Eventually, after solving everything, Eddie and Richie came to the latter’s room with shy smiles on their faces and hand in each other’s. Mike and Stan both knew, “they totally made out,” Mike spoke to Stan and he laughed and nodded, “yup, they definitely did.”
You could see a blush forming on Eddie’s cheeks. On Richie’s on the other hand? Not so much.
Bill was in his room, doing his homework. Georgie peeked in his room and asked, “can I come in?” Bill gave him permission. Of course he did, he never denied Georgie anything that wasn’t dangerous for him. Georgie’s smile grew on his lips.
“When is Stan coming over? He’s my favourite.” Bill thought for a while before answering, “I don’t know, maybe I could call him and ask him if he wants to come today? It’s only 5 pm, I’m sure his parents would allow him to come. I do have one question, though, I thought you said Mike was your favourite?” One thing Bill had noticed was that whenever he talked to his brother alone, he didn’t stutter. He wasn’t sure why.
Georgie laughed and looked at Bill. He nodded. “Yeah, both Stan and Mike are my favourites. Richie’s pretty funny too.” Bill laughed at that, “promise me you will never say that to him or else he’ll forever be smug about it.” Georgie laughed too and settled on the floor, playing with his toy car he had brought with him. “Okay, I won’t.”
Stan had come home at 4:50 pm. His phone rang at 5:24 pm. The caller ID said Bill Denbrough. In Stan’s contact list, everyone had their last name at the end of their first name. He didn’t know any other Bills but he just liked the neat look it gave to his contacts.
“Hello.” Bill chuckled at the other end, “y- you sounded v-very o-official, it- it’s just me, B-Bill.” Stan could basically hear the smile on Bill’s face. “Sorry,” he apologised.
“Don’t be, it- it’s fine. Georgie asked when you were going t-to come over and I told him I would a-ask you now.” That made Stan smile. Somebody was asking for him. “I’m coming now.” Little did he know, Bill had brought his phone up to his chest after that call and smiled fondly at the thought of him.
Later that night Georgie was sat between Bill and Stan on the Denbrough household’s living room sofa. He was fiddling with both Stan’s and Bill’s fingers.
They were watching Cars. The scene where Lightning and Sally are driving around and Lightning gets flies on his teeth comes on. “That’s like Bill! Lightning is like Bill!” Georgie laughed.
Stan burst out laughing, between laughs, he managed to get out, “yeah, he is.” Bill frowned, “I can’t even watch a- a movie in my o- own house without get- getting bullied.” Stan looked at him over Georgie’s head, “I’m sorry. That was just so good, it was amazing, bud.” Stan gave no one nicknames but Georgie he called bud sometimes. Bill thought it was adorable. And in all honesty, he thought everything Stan did was adorable.
“Stanny, you’re like Sally.” Now Bill started laughing and couldn’t bring himself to stop. “Georgie, I trusted you! You were supposed to make fun of Billy, not me!” Then he realised what he said and his face went crimson, “You were supposed to be on my side!” he tried to shrug it off as something he would usually say.
Bill’s heart started to beat much faster when he heard Stan calling him Billy, literally moments before he had thought about Stan’s lack of nicknames for people. “Well, even y- your name rhymes with- with hers, Stanny and Sally.”
Stan groaned, “ugh, I think I have to go, I’m getting bullied.” Georgie’s smile turned to a look of horror, “no! Stanny! You can’t leave. I’m so sorry!” He jumped on Stan’s lap and hugged him, throwing his arms around his neck. Stan wrapped his arms around his notably smaller figure and chuckled. “You’re forgiven. Both of you.”
Georgie settled in Stan’s lap and Bill looked over at Stan and then between them. There was an empty space there. He was deciding between whether he should move closer to Stan or stay where he was now. He dared to move after approximately six minutes of bickering about it in his head, with himself.
Stan noticed Bill moved and said nothing. He smiled to himself.
When Bill grabbed Stan’s arm and placed it behind himself, on his shoulder, put his head on Stan’s shoulder and got comfortable Stan’s heart might have stopped in his chest. He moved his arm ever so lightly, to get it in a good position so it wouldn’t hurt.
Both Denbrough brothers fell asleep a few minutes after. By the end of the film, Stan was asleep as well.
Bill and Stan had silenced their phones so they wouldn’t be distracted. Richie, Eddie and Mike had all three tried to call them and send them endless messages. So when they showed up at Bill’s house it was no surprise.
What was a surprise was what they found when Mrs. Denbrough opened the door and told them the boys were in the living room. Georgie had already woken up and left Stanley’s lap careful not to wake him or Bill up. “I knew it,” Mike whispered. “So did we,” Eddie spoke softly. Richie had already taken his phone out and was taking pictures of the two boys sleeping.
He posted a picture of the two, Bill’s head against Stan’s shoulder and his hand holding the other’s, on his Snapchat story he had made for their group. The story’s name was a red balloon. It was because he had originally meant it to be his birthday story where he could post as much pictures and videos he liked but then it stuck around. And now they mostly post candid shots of each other there. He captioned his newest masterpiece ‘two soft bois™ sleeping in each other’s warm embrace’.
Beverly immediately sent him a snap asking for a video. How could Richie say no to her? He was simply doing what he was asked. He went walked backwards a few steps and started recording the view.
He filmed them from every angle possible but then he was right up at Stanley’s face, he woke up. He stirred his eyes and looked around the room where he saw Eddie and Mike smiling at him and Richie right in front of him filming him. What he didn’t notice straight away was how he was sitting with Bill.
When he realised, he raised his eyebrows and his eyes widened. ”Uh- um, this isn’t what it- what it looks like. At. All.” Richie looked at him straight into his eyes. He did this with people, if he wanted them to admit something. He would stare at them, like a really intense stare, until tehy would admit it.
”Ugh, alright then. I guess we were cuddling.” Richie looked like a proud mum, ”that’s more like it.”
”We can go to Bill’s room and leave you two alone, you can wake him up,” Mike offered and Eddie nodded behind him. Richie got up from where he had kneeled in front of his two friends. The three of them walked to Bill’s room.
’Okay, Stanley. You got this, You can do it. What s the worst that can happen? Bill could either freak out and tell him to leave or he could be totally chill about it and just shrug it off,’ he thought himself. ”Bill,” he whispered. Bill moved a little, making himself more comfortable.
”Billy, wake up,” he still didn’t open his eyes. Stan didn’t want to make a lot of noise so he thought tickling Bill awake would be the best option. So he did.
He started tickling Bill on his sides where he knew he was really ticklish. At first he just looked uncomfortable, he scrunched his nose and boy, did it look adorable. But then he woke up and it hit him that Stan was, in fact, tickling him. ”St- Stan! Stop it!” he laughed. Stan laughed with him and Bill tried to distract him but failed.
Stan was on top of him, knees on both sides of him. He continued tickling him, he moved his hands from his sides to his neck. The boy under him tried to shake him off of himself but wasn’t too successful at it.
”Okay, okay, I-I sur-surrender,” Bill said and lifted his arms up. Stan stopped tickling him. ”Good, you finally woke up.” The smile on Bill’s face was almost as big as the smile that had been on Georgie’s face earlier. ”O- oh yeah because it t- took you so much effort to wake me u- up,” Bill spoke.
”It did, actually. I had to use my amazing tickling skills. Which, by the way, work like magic as you probably noticed,” Stan exclaimed. ”They do, you’re r- right.” Stan got up and retched out his hand for Bill to grab. He did and got up from the couch.
”Eddie, Richie and Mike are here by the way, they already went to your room.” Bill froze for a second, ”what? We- were we still c-c- cuddling,” he gulped, ”when they- they came?” Stan looked at him and nodded. ”Yes, why?” He knew Bill would freak out. Now he was going to kick him out of his house and tell about him to their friends and convince that there was nothing going on between them.
Bill thought about it and the more he thought about it the more assured he was that their friends would be fine with whatever was happening between them. “It’s just, I- I don’t know, I th- think it’ll be aw- awkward” he wasn’t sure what to answer.
Stan looked at his and Bill’s intertwined hands, “you know, we can just hang out with them now, right? I think they came here to ask if you had anything to tell about Patrick or Henry or the others.” Something changed in Bill’s facial expression and he seemed more relaxed. “W- well, w- we better go t- to my room then.” Stan nodded.
They walked to Bill’s room and just before they entered, Bill let go of Stan’s hand. That stung a little, Stan tried not to think about it too much. He didn’t need to when he turned the sound back on on his phone and he saw a WhatsApp message from Beverly in the group chat. “Hey, guys, did you see this?” he showed the message to the others. Everyone shook their head.
Beverly had been told that apparently Henry went to Patrick’s house and threatened to do something to his family. That’s when Patrick realised how fucked up Henry Bowers really was and swore he’d never hang out with him again.
“We did it! One down, two to go!” Richie shouted and grinned, adjusting his glasses. Eddie laughed, “yeah, well technically three if you count Henry himself but I assume you’re talking about his minions?”
Richie pecked his boyfriends lips and wrapped his arm around his shoulder. “Yes, Eddie Spaghetti. That is exactly what I mean, my love.”
“Don’t roll your eyes too hard, they’re going to stay like that forever. You would still be pretty, though,” he continued soon enough after realising the boy next to him had rolled his eyes. “Fuck off, Richie.”
Mike high fived everyone and sent a message to the group chat saying he’s proud of them all. Ben agreed and Beverly sent a heart emoji. Bill shot Stan his brightest smile, the one he would save for him and only for him. Stan replied with a slight smile but his expression was back to annoyed in a matter of seconds. Might or might not have had something to do with Richie being loud and irritating.
Eddie, Mike and Richie left just as quickly as they left. “Ha- have you noticed you- you’re always th- the last one here w- when we hang out i- in a group?” That was true, Stan thought. Every time they hung out with the group, he would always end up being the last one at Bill’s house. How was that possible? “Yes, I’ve noticed. I wonder how that always happens,” he chuckled.
“M- me too. I don- don’t mind. I guess it- it’s just co- coincidence,” Bill stated. Probably. Stan didn’t think there was a specific reason behind it. It just happened. So he just nodded.
Stan’s phone rang, it was his mum. “Hello,” he answered. “Yeah, I’m coming, on my way, mum.” He ended the call and Bill knew he had to go home. Stan went to put his shoes on and Bill went with him. “Y- you don- don’t want m- me to w- walk you home?” he asked Stan and he swore he could melt at his actions. Bill was so sweet. Nonetheless, he shook his head, “no need to, I can go by myself, I have my bike.”
“O- okay, I’ll s- see you at sch- school tomorrow.” Before Stan left, he gave Bill a hug. He wrapped his arms around Bill’s neck and buried his face between his jaw and shoulder. Bill was startled but wrapped his arms around Stan’s waist.
They pulled away from each other and Stan wished him good night and started pedalling home. What is wrong with him? Why did he have to do that? What if Bill only hugs him back because he feel like he’s obliged to?
One would say Stan is head over heels in love with Bill and Stan is now realising himself that he indeed is.
that was a lot longer than i intended it to be but like, i'm proud of myself so i guess it's fine
it is now 1am so if there are any mistakes please forgive me (but pls do still tell me so i can correct them)
leave feedback, please, it'd be amazing
thank you, peace out!!!
Chapter 3: Coming out
Richie and Eddie ask Patrick for help. Bill and Stan come out. Something Stan thought he'd never do, he still did it.
// this chapter was pretty stan-centric, and a little bit of stenbrough, duh
jesus, here we are
i literally don't know anything about being jewish or having ocd, i took ethics (as in i wasn't in religious studies) in primary school, in secondary school and still taking it in upper secondary and what comes to having ocd...
i'm pretty much relying on google and wikipedia, hope i get at least some of it right, i'm trying not to exaggerate it the best i can, i hope i'm not embarrassing myself
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
It had been a couple of days since Patrick Hockstetter told Henry Bowers simply to fuck off. He was trying to make sure his family was safe by keeping watch. He had a baseball bat with him when he sat in front of their outdoor. He would flinch every time he heard a sound. Even if it was just the wind.
“Hello? Who’s there?” he asked to the darkness. He had heard something that certainly wasn’t the wind. It was like someone was outside the door, some kind of a rustling sound.
Then there was a light knock on their door. He stiffened and got up from his seat. Slowly, he opened the door only to find the one and only Richie Tozier there, with his boyfriend. Of course, Patrick didn’t know if they actually were together but they sure looked and acted like they were. His face went through emotion possible at that moment, relief, confusion, anger and even happiness, the smallest amount possible. “What the hell are you doing here?” he spat, not as coldly as Henry but still coldly.
Richie’s face twisted into a curious grin, “why on earth do you have a baseball bat in your hand? Wait, no, actually don’t answer. Let me guess, you still think Henry’s gonna show up at your house and beat the shit out of you all?” he chuckled. Eddie hit his arm, signaling him to let it go. Since when did Eddie think about Patrick Hockstetter’s feelings? He himself didn’t know the answer to that either.
The former bully of the two shifted on his feet. “So, like I asked, why are you here? It’s like 9 pm, shouldn’t you be home?” Eddie was quick to reply, “we actually need your help. With Henry.” Patrick was ever so confused. “Why the hell would you need me? What can I possibly do and why would I do it?”
“Well, you want to get rid of Henry right? Not as in, like kill him or anything, although that would be a considerable option too, but like crumble him? Right, so we’re gonna come up with a plan to fuck with him.” Patrick was actually quite impressed if he was honest. He always thought that the group of kids they called losers were helpless and an easy target but apparently there was more to them.
“O- okay? So you need my help to do that or?” Richie smiled a sweet smile, “exactly, so are you gonna help or not? Did we come all the way here just to hear you say no? Because I am sure you want to screw him up as much as we want to, maybe even more.” Patrick had to admit, even if he didn’t really care about the Tozier kid or his friends and their problems with Henry, Richie did have a point. And for the cherry on top, he was very convincing.
“Alright, I’ll do it.” Richie turned to Eddie and thye smiled each other like they had just won the lottery, “but I don’t want anything with that gay shit you have going on in your little group.” Ah, there he was, the good ol’ Patrick.
Stan had previously taken medication to help him with his OCD and it had helped him. In fact, he still took them. He had a pill dispenser, each day he took Luvox. He swallowed one with a glass of water. His OCD was still there, absolutely. He washed his hands far more than the others did, he organised his lunch, if his food mixed he would simply toss it in the trash or give it to one of his friends and buy something from the vending machine.
“But someone has touched these candy bars too, Bill. You never know if they’ve accidentally made a hole to the wrapper and now it’s not edible anymore,” he had stated when Bill walked to the vending machine with him because he didn’t want to do it alone.
Bill had looked at him and reasoned with him, “w- well, do you t- trust me?” Stan nodded. “They are e- edible, they are to- totally fine. Yes, you- you’re right, someone has t- t -t- touched them b- b- but we can ex- examine the whole wrapper a- and make sure the- there are no holes, h- how does that s- s- sound?
Stan had a smile tugging on his lips and he spoke up, “okay, that sounds good. But if there is a hole, I’m never using another vending machine, okay?” Bill had laughed and taken coins from his pocket to buy a Snickers from the machine in front of the two boys.
He would sometimes have struggles to hang out with his friends, especially Richie. Richie was one of the messiest people he had ever encountered. He always left his socks around his house, underwear too, not bothering to clean up before his friends came to visit. His parents didn’t care either. Wentworth Tozier was too busy with his career as a successful dentist and his mother, well his mother was more keen on her bottle of vodka than Richie.
While his parents were busy doing something, anything else than taking care of their son, his friends were there for him and Stan was one of them. Even if it was hard for him sometimes to contain his urge to clean the whole place.
Between taking his medication and eating breakfast, Stan usually made himself look presentable. That meant combing his hair a little bit, not too much to make it frizzy, brushing his teeth and then pulling on the khaki shorts and buttoning up the light blue button up shirt he had picked yesterday evening.
Then he ate breakfast. Toast with margarine and a glass of milk. He settled down to eat with his mother while his father, Rabbi Uris, was reading a newspaper. “Can you believe these homosexuals are walking on our streets? On Derry’s streets, that should be safe for children.” Stan had shaken his head, “no dad, I can’t.” He held back tears, bit his lip before taking a bite of his toast.
After he had finished his breakfast with his parents, which they insisted to have together and they never even spoke, he went to his room to get his backpack and walked to Bill’s house. The walk there took about 20 minutes. He always walked the same path, never taking risks of getting lost. He knew he wouldn’t get lost but he just couldn’t bring himself to take another way and why should he? He was perfectly fine with this one.
When he walked past the houses, he often thought about what kind of people lived in them. For example the beige house opposite Bill’s had an old couple living in it. They had beautiful, red roses in their front yard, in a neat line on both sides of the path that led to their front door, decorating it and making it look absolutely beautiful.
The couple seemed nice. They greeted the two boys whenever they walked past them and Bill and Stan would smile and say ‘hi’ back to them. Then they would look back at them and coo over how cute the couple was, holding hands and walking slowly towards their destination.
By the time Stan had reached Bill’s door, he had shrugged his dad’s words from earlier, although they were still in the back of his mind. He did their secret knock, four knocks, a pause and then two knocks, so Bill would know it’s him. Stan stood on the Denbrough’s porch for roughly thirty seconds when he heard Bill’s voice telling his little brother it was Stan. “I know, I recognise your knock.”
Bill opened the door and Stan looked shocked, “how do you know our secret knock?” he asked Georgie, who was standing behind Bill, smiling at the curly haired boy. “It’s not a secret anymore!” The smaller boy laughed and ran away. “He- he fi- fi- figured it out after a couple of- of times we did it,” Bill told Stan who nodded at him.
“Shall we go?” Stan asked and offered Bill his hand. The latter grabbed it and they started walking towards school.
Stan had mixed feelings about Bill and Bill on the other hand, had mixed feelings about Stan. Stan was sure Bill didn’t like him back, that he was just being polite. He still held his hand as muh as he could and gave him hugs and, a couple of times, he had even kissed him on the cheek.
The other boy was too shy to actually tell Stan, instead dropping hints and God knows Stan was oblivious to that kind of things. They were already affectionate with each other so it would be hard for Bill to show him he liked him. It would take more than holding hands and shooting glances at him when someone was speaking. ‘At some point, I think I have to either tell him in words… or I could-’
His thoughts were interrupted when Stan’s hand grabbed his even harder it had before and pulled him behind the corner. Bill was confused. “Wha- what now?” he questioned his best friend, his crush of almost two years.
“It’s Victor. I didn’t want him to see us,” he simply said. Usually Stan would’ve walked past him without even giving him a second look.
Bill was suspicious. Something was off with Stan and he was determined to find out what. “What is- is going on with you?” It was definitely one of the clearest sentences he had formed in a long time. “There is some- something weird going on with- with you, I can t- te- tell.”
Stan’s stomach dropped. Bill was right, there was something bugging him. It was his dad’s words. “On Derry’s streets, that should be safe for children.” As if Stan or any other gay man he knew, they were Eddie and Richie and he wasn’t sure if Richie counted as he was bisexual, would ever do anything to a child. Stan shook his head, he couldn’t tell Bill now, here, in the middle of their way to school, could he? He shook his head again, much less noticeably. He couldn’t.
“I will tell you at school, at lunch, okay? I can’t talk about it right now. I have to think what I’m going to say to you.” Bill was utterly confused at this point, “you don- don’t have a serious ill- illness, d- do you? Besides, well y- you know..” he said and scratched the back of his neck.
“Besides OCD? You know you can say it out loud, right? I hate it but I can’t hide the fact that I have it. But no, I can assure you it’s nothing that serious, Bill. Don’t worry too much about it.” Bill’s face relaxed, “g- good.”
Bill was anxious the whole day, until lunch where his anxiety grew into fear. He was scared of what Stan had going on in his life. What if it was something that would affect their friendship? When Stan had told the others that he and Bill would sit together today, they had immediately known what was going to happen and they all had given him thumbs up and Richie even got up and mouthed, “go get your man.” To which, much to Richie’s dismay, his answer was his middle finger.
When they finally found an empty table in the cafeteria, they sat down and suddenly Stan was having trouble breathing. He calmed himself down and hoped Bill didn’t notice. But what do you expect from Bill? Of course he noticed.
“Stan, I- I need you t- to tell me what’s go- going on, ri- right n- now,” he demanded. Not in a scary or angry way, but in a soft, Bill Denbrough way that would get anyone tell anything to him without any hesitation.
And that’s exactly what happened.
Stan took a couple of deep breaths and opened his mouth, “do you promise you won’t get mad? Or ditch me?” Bill nodded eagerly, “of- of course, Stan. You’re my best friend, I would never ditch you.”
Bill took a bite of his sandwich his mother had made him and answered, “so- sorry, I- I didn’t ca- ca- catch that, you want to f- f -fray? What d- do you want to fray, that do- do- doesn’t make a- any sense,” his voice was filled with concern and Stan wanted to sink under the ground at that moment.
“I might be gay,” he whispered again, much more slowly, to make sure Bill, and only Bill, heard him.
Bill’s eyes were fixed on Stan’s face. “Okay,” he said, without stuttering. He had had a crush on Stan since middle school and now he told Bill he was gay. It gave Bill a ray of hope, maybe he had a chance with him.
Stan didn’t notice Bill staring at him because his gaze was on the tray in front of him on the table. He was looking at it so intensely Bill was scared he would drill a hole in the table with his eyes. “That’s all you have to say?” Stan whispered so carefully it was barely audible. “You’re not going to stop hanging out with me? You’re not disgusted by the fact that you’ve been holding a gay man’s hand and let him hug you?”
Bill chuckled, “n- no, why would I be? You- you’re wonderful. Ju- ju- just as you are, and no- nothing is gonna ch- ch- ch- change that.” Stan’s concern in his eyes turned into relief and Bill was happy. He was happy Stan had had the courage to tell him.
“Stan, I- I’m not as s- s- stra- straight as a r- ru-uler, either.” Stan’s hand flew to his mouth, “what? What did you just say?” Bill continued speaking, “I th- think you kno- know what I s- s- said.”
Stan did, yes, but his brain wasn’t registering it. He knew he heard Bill right but he still didn’t believe it. Was Bill gay? Or bisexual, like Richie? There were other sexualities too. Would he be rude if he asked? He might as well try now that they’re talking about the subject.
He whispered, careful not the let anyone hear them, “if you’re not straight, are you gay?” Bill burst out laughing and Stan frowned, no he had made a fool of himself. Bill noticed the change in his expression. “Don’t g- get like th- that, it’s okay. I just, I’m not s- su- sure. I know I- I’m not gay n- no- nor straight. Something i- in bet- between.”
Stan smiled a little, “okay. You’ll figure it out, I’ll help you.” Bill smiled back and that was a moment neither of them would ever forget.
i really enjoyed writing this, hope you enjoy reading it :)