It was the third night in a row that Dougal came up yelling from a dream. It was normal for Dougal to dream vividly and talk in his sleep, but night terrors were a new development in his sleep pattern. Ted switched on the light to find the young man sitting up in his bed twitching with anxiety. Yes, this was a new development, and with things as they were with their sleeping arrangements, it had to be the least pleasant development to come.
Ted looked over at Dougal. "I wish you'd tell me what the dreams are about, Dougal."
The younger priest only shook his head in wild-eyed misery.
"Dougal!" Ted let out an exasperated sigh but Dougal remained mute sitting in his bed nervously fingering an edge of his silk football jersey pajama top. Ted sighed again.
"Okay. Goodnight Dougal," he said as he switched the light off again.
Ted settled back in his bed and listened as Dougal did the same, but unlike his norm, the younger priest seemed too still and too silent for too long. Dougal was a thrasher who tossed, turned and talked in his sleep practically all night long. Ted grimaced into the darkness but was unsure of what he could do if Dougal maintained his stony silence. So he turned to his side, away from Dougal, and tried to go back to sleep.
He wasn't sure how much later it had been but he had made some progress apparently for Dougal's body dipping the edge of his bed shocked him into wakefulness. Wordlessly, Dougal slipped into the covers of Ted's small twin bed, nestling close behind him. Ted knew what was happening. He knew that Dougal's fears had driven him to seek refugee in the bed of the only person he had to take care of him. In a small way, Ted was touched. However, mostly Ted was indignant at being crowded out of his own bed. At least he had the compassion to keep his voice from being a growling rant.
"Dougal, what are you doing?"
The young man looked up innocently, "Ah… sleeping, Ted."
"Not in my bed you're not!" Ted put more force in his voice.
"Please, Ted," Dougal talked fast. "I figured if I was in bed with you, I wouldn't have the dream."
"Just what is this dream anyway?" Ted asked as he turned to face Dougal.
"I'd rather not say just now."
Ted looked Dougal over in the semi-darkness. His large eyes were bright with unspoken fears and Ted felt himself fold before the young man's desperation.
"Okay, Dougal, but stay on your side."
Dougal's smile was visible in the darkness. "All right, Ted." He then scooted into the covers. Ted flopped back over to his side and tried to ignore the warm lump of living flesh at his back. This had to be the pinnacle of all the uncomfortable things that Dougal has put him through.
The pale light of dawn was beginning its slow progress to the window. Ted woke, too warm. He woke to softness against his back, warmth that moved slowly, gently, rocking. An arm thrown about his waist held him in a loose and comfortable embrace. Soft lips whispered breath across the back of his neck.
"Ted… Ted…." Over and over the soft whisper of his name stirred the hairs at the nape of his neck and warmed his skin. It took moments for the haze of sleep to clear and for Ted to realize that the arms that held him, the lips that brushed feather light against his skin, the hips that rocked in a steady slow rhythm belonged to Dougal. Ted lay frozen for a moment as he felt the heat of an erection firmly pressed against the curve of his buttock.
Emotions ran through Ted in a sudden rushing wave. Many of them he did not expect and many he did. But the one he fought the hardest was the searing spike of longing and desire. It hadn't been all that long since the first time Dougal had reminded Ted that he was a sexual creature by simply donning a pair of spandex shorts. Dougal had not worn the cycling shorts again, but the memory of his youthful spandex clad body still burned in Ted's mind. It was an insistent memory that made Ted's hands tingle to touch and his mouth water to taste.
Now Dougal lay against Ted, softly breathing his name and rubbing his solid sex against him. Amazement and something akin to indigence froze Ted in place but only for a moment. Desire turned him about to carefully wake Dougal.
"Dougal," Ted said in a soft but firm voice as he rolled to the lad. Dougal woke with a near violent start, his eyes flying open and his body twitching in shock.
"Easy, lad," Ted said softly as he brought a hand to his cinnamon stick hair. Gently, Ted brushed Dougal's hair back from his eyes. "You were dreaming?"
For a moment panic filled Dougal's expression as he looked at Ted in the dim morning light. Dougal swallowed hard. Ted felt a small tremor run through the young priest body. Stunned beyond words, Dougal tried to move his head in a gesture that should have answered Ted's question, but confusion kept the movement from either being a definite nod or shake.
"It's all right, Dougal," Ted soothed. "Don't be frightened." He ran a hand gently over Dougal's hair but the young priest stayed agitated and unsettled.
"Dougal!" Ted pleaded softly.
"Yes, Ted?" Dougal said in a soft shaky voice so unlike him that Ted began to feel extremely concerned.
"Talk to me. Was it *the* dream?"
This time Dougal's head nodded yes in answer.
So that was the problem. Dougal was having erotic dreams. Ted had always assumed that Dougal experienced puberty like any other lad. He must have had fantasies. He certainly had to have had the occasional and inconvenient adolescent erection like any other boy. Was it possible that Dougal had no idea what was happening to his body? Could it be possible that at age 26, Dougal McGuire was more than just a virgin but also a non-sexual creature all together?
Ted was certain he had heard Dougal talk in his sleep about nude women. Granted he never seemed too concerned in his dreams about them and tended to ask them continually to put their clothing back on. Ted was utterly confused on how one could go through puberty and never know or understand the nature of a wet dream. Maybe Dougal had never let his wet dreams go to completion?
"Dougal," Ted said gently. "Tell me, have you ever had dreams like that before… say when you were a lad of 14 or thereabouts?"
Dougal shook his head no.
Again he shook his head.
The look in Dougal's eye convinced Ted that he was telling the truth. There was a wild desperation in his large dark gray-green eyes that made Ted's heart ache for the lad. Dougal lay on his back, ridged with fear, looking at Ted as if he thought the older Priest would flay him alive any moment.
Ted smiled softly. "It's nothing to fear, Dougal. It's natural."
"I've never had my lad do this before," Dougal said in a blunt gruff tone. "It's not right, Ted."
"It's all right Dougal," Ted chuckled a bit. "It's an erection."
Dougal paused a moment with a vacant stare. "I don't know who the candidates are…"
"Not an election…." Then Ted sighed. He couldn't help but feel amused at Dougal's confusion, but he genuinely felt for the lad. He looked away a bit to hide his smile but as he turned back and looked at Dougal, something in Ted broke. Framed by dawn's pale light, Dougal's fair skin glowed like the smoothest cream. Soft flush of his cheeks and his full lips, parted, trembling like the fresh petals of a new rose in the morning dew, drew Ted closer.
Ted had forgotten that Dougal was beautiful. He had forgotten that the silly but lovable dimwit that he shared his parish with was also a young and desirable man.
"An erection, Dougal," Ted said softly, mesmerized by Dougal's charm in the half-light.
"What is that now, Ted," said Dougal. "Some sort of mad Japanese disease?"
Ted shook his head and laughed again. "No Dougal." But then Ted hesitated as he realized he was going to have to spell it out for him. "Its… well it's…. It's when your lad gets excited and… and… wants to be touched."
Dougal's eyes went round in shock. "Oooooooooooh, noooo, no no no, Ted! Mama said I shouldn't!"
Well, that was not a surprise. Ted didn't no a man in all of Ireland who's mother didn't tell him not to lay a finger on his own stiffy. Back when Ted was a young lad, the old wives' tale about masturbation causing blindness was still widely used and wholly ineffective.
"Dougal," Ted soothed. "It's okay. Nothing is going to happen to you." Some other part of Ted's rational mind was busy quoting Catholic doctrine on the subject, but Ted's heart decided to disconnect the priest from the man for a little while. Regardless of the fact that it was no longer looked upon as a mortal sin by the Church, it was still frowned upon in mature adults; especially the ordained. In fact it was contrary to their vows and still a sin, at least for them.
But there was a loophole. Ted's heart sang as he thought of the perfect solution that would only bring pleasure to the both of them.
"Okay then, Dougal," Ted said resolutely. "Your right. You shouldn't have to touch it if it makes you uncomfortable. That means you have two choices: wait till it goes away on it's own or let me touch it for you."
Dougal's whole body seemed to surge at the latter portion of Ted's suggestion. A strange light came into the young man's eyes that was a mixture of fear and something that Ted thought could be unbridled desire.
So it was my name he was whispering in his dreams. It was me he was dreaming of.
The idea made bolt of lust race like electricity down Ted's spine.
"Do you want me to, Dougal?" Ted asked softly.
Dougal swallowed hard again and looked at Ted with the eyes of a frightened animal. Slowly he nodded his head.
It was all the invitation Ted needed. His heart began to race as he looked into Dougal's expectant face. His hand was not steady as he reached up to unbutton Dougal's jersey, but he managed the buttons with slow care. Dougal trembled slightly in his arms as Ted pushed the fabric back from his chest.
"It's okay," Ted soothed softly as he ran his hand down Dougal's youthful body. He had very little hair on his chest. It was sparse and silken fine. Ted's fingers brushed through lightly. A fingertip brushed a nipple and Ted felt it begin to tighten in excitement.
He does want me! Ted thought and even as he thought this, one heavy, shaking sigh escaped Dougal's parted lips. Dougal's body surged beneath Ted's touch, nearly pushing up into his fingers. There was no doubt that Dougal's body craved this touch very much. Ted licked his dry lips as he let his hand venture downward slowly. A small whimper on a caught breath was Dougal's only reaction as Ted's fingers brush down past his navel.
"It's okay," Ted whispered again when his fingers made contact with Dougal's pajama bottoms. The sun was rising and the new rays touched the room through the bedroom window. The golden light touched the edges of Dougal's rich dark auburn hair, setting it a light with golden tones. Ted watched mesmerized as his otherwise unworldly and simple friend glowed with the fire of pleasure in the morning sunlight. His sea-storm eyes half-lidded in heedless pleasure, and his full lips moist and parted, Dougal was transformed into something erotic yet pure at the same time. Ted leaned closer in letting his nose and lips nuzzle close to the warm cream soft flesh of Dougal's neck just below his ear. His hand ran the length of Dougal's erection still trapped inside his pj bottoms.
Dougal shivered and sighed, his lips trembling. Ted so wanted to taste those soft pink lips that he had to close his eyes, biting his own lip to reign in his desire. Ted's fingers traced the solid length. He could feel its heat through the fabric of Dougal's pajamas. Ted breathed in the heady scent of Dougal as it intensified in the heat of his arousal. There was something sweet and clean about his scent that made Ted press closer. Dougal's breath was a shuddering pant now.
Carefully Ted slipped his hand past the waistband of Dougal's bottoms. His fingers breached the younger priest briefs as well. He found his erection immediately and his finger tips brushed over the hot silk soft head, tucked in the folds of foreskin And already moist with pre-come. Dougal's mouth and eyes opened wide as he emitted a shocked cry.
"Shhh, lad," Ted whispered against his ear. "Its all right."
Dougal squirmed beneath Ted's touch but he did not pull away. Ted let his hand slip down the length of his heated member. Ted gave it a few soothing strokes before he wrapped his hand about its solid length. Dougal was satisfyingly decent in size. The erection felt almost as thick as Ted's own normally felt. Its length was about average. Ted pulled on Dougal's cock gently, the first stroke of masturbation. Dougal's body surged once again and Dougal whimpered plaintively.
"Shhh…" Ted whispered as his lips brushed Dougal's skin at the curve of his jaw. He held Dougal firmly as he gave him a few more strokes. Then he let his hand wander a bit down. His fingertips bushed the soft rounds of Dougal's balls. That was when Dougal's legs fell open and his back arched. Ted had never seen Dougal look so completely sensual. Dougal's eyes closed as his head fell back. His moist full lips still trembling on heavy breaths, Dougal let out such a groan of pleasure such that Ted never knew him capable of. It was beyond words.
Ted's own throbbing sex lay trapped in his pajamas. Ted so dearly wanted to press himself to Dougal's thigh that he ached with the need. But Ted held himself back in a strange mixture of blind loyalty to his vows and fear of betraying Dougal's trust. Yet here he was, his hand sunk in Dougal's pants, handling his stiff sex, but he feared that taking some modicum of pleasure back by sheer friction of fabric clad body to fabric clad thigh was going too far. It wasn't logical Ted knew in the back of his mind, but he didn't question it.
Instead he carefully pulled Dougal's pjs and underwear down, freeing the young man's erection from its clothing prison. He kicked back the covers of the bed and let the cool air run over Dougal's exposed flesh. Now Ted looked down in wonder at the beauty he had uncovered. Dougal's pale cream colored flesh touched by the morning sunlight glowed with an unearthly pearl like radiance.
"Beautiful…," Ted whispered reverently as his fingers stroked with devout tenderness. Ted pulled Dougal closer as he gazed down in awe at the young priest.
"So beautiful," he whispered once more as he moved his hand up to Dougal's ready shaft. He took it in a firm grip and began a steady stroke. Dougal moaned, his head moving from side to side and his hands clutching frantically at the bed covers.
"Hush now," Ted whispered placing his lips gently to Dougal's temple. "I have you. Hush, my cinnamon lad." The endearment came so easily to Ted's lips that he hardly knew he spoke it till he said it again.
"My beautiful cinnamon lad."
Ted's eyes closed as he to was carried away on the sight and sounds of sweet pleasure of his lovely Dougal. The hot hardness in his hand slipped on pre-come moisture as Dougal began to push willingly up into Ted's steady grip. Ted opened his eyes once more to watch his Dougal, ardent and salacious, aroused beyond all reason, squirming in his tight embrace and panting moans of pleasure, oblivious to the ordinary world of the parochial house around him. Dougal was new and different. He was released and reborn. Before Ted's eyes, Dougal was transformed into more than just a beautiful young man but also a sensual creature of pleasure, as much or maybe even more so than Ted ever was himself.
"Yes, Dougal," Ted panted in a horse whisper against him. "Come on, lad. Don't be afraid. I have you now. I have you…"
A trembling cry escaped Dougal's parted lips and he convulsed back against Ted. Ted felt the young priest sex swell in his hands then he was coming. Dougal's member throbbed hard in Ted's hold as streams of pearl white semen flew from its tip landing on Dougal's belly. The orgasm was inordinately long and Ted marveled at the sheer volume of come the lad released. The look of wild ecstasy on Dougal's face brought Ted dangerously close to a climax as well but he held a firm control on his body and curved his hips away to avoid contact.
After a quiet moment with only the sound of Dougal's labored breath in the cooler aftermath of passion, Dougal made one long shuddering sigh and Ted chuckled.
"You've been holding that load for a while, haven't you?"
Dougal opened his eyes and looked at Ted bewildered.
"Never mind," Ted smiled as he released him. He then sat up. He knew he had to escape that bed before he did something he promised himself and his God he would not do. Putting his feet off the side of the bed, Ted braced himself to walk away from the most beautiful sight he had even know in all his life.
Dougal breathed his name hesitantly. "Ted?"
Ted stopped and turned back to Dougal. With his dark auburn hair in disarray and his pajamas open, his belly smeared with thick white semen and his sex laying limp but flush between open legs, Dougal looked about as debauched as any man could and it looked so much worse to Ted because he was Dougal.
Dougal swallowed, his eyes bright with a strange new understanding. "There really is a God!" he whispered in astonishment.
Ted stopped, frozen in his own realization of Dougal. Then he gently stroked back the young man's hair with his one clean hand. "Yes, Dougal, there really is."
He watched Dougal's lovely sea-storm eyes for a moment longer, stroking back his cinnamon stick hair while cradling his semen covered hand in his own lap. Then Ted turned away again, rising quickly to hurry off to the bathroom.
He thanked God that he had installed the shower in their simple bathtub not long ago and he began to heedlessly strip out of his pajamas as he turned on the shower's cold valve. He didn't touch the hot valve at all. Just the feeling of the chilly pelting water on his hand was enough to make him shiver. Already his heavy erection began to recede as it anticipated the shock. Ted stepped in, fighting the urge to scream 'Sweet Jesus!' as the cold water struck his skin, chilling him to the bone.
The erection was no match for that. His hand was rinsed clean of the evidence of his sin but Ted's heart felt stained still. He sunk down to a sitting position in the tub with his head bowed, chilled but adjusted to the cold spray. Guilt washed over him and he mumbled the prayer he had known since childhood to help cleanse his soul.
"Deus meus, ex toto corde poenitet me omnium meorum peccatorum, eaque detestor, quia peccando, non solum poenas a Te iuste statutas promeritus sum, sed praesertim quia offendi Te, summum bonum, ac dignum qui super omnia diligaris. Ideo firmiter propono, adiuvante gratia Tua, de cetero me non peccaturum peccandique occasiones proximas fugiturum. Amen."*
He repeated it over and over, letting tears of repentance mix with the cold water of the shower.