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Donkey Dust

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Murdoc chuckled happily to himself, feeling pleasant tingles up and down his legs, his hands twitching subtly against his stomach. He could feel himself slipping in and out of consciousness, but welcomed the sensation as waves upon waves of what seemed like pins and needles swept through him. He felt like his brain was melting in his head, suddenly underwater and his limbs were made of lead.
The gear he'd bought off that woman in the bar was really something, of course, he'd experienced this before, but not for a very long time, and welcomed this high like an old friend.
The old goth felt like he had laid there for years, watching the low lights in his room shift and change around him. In reality, he had only been laying there for about ten minutes.

Down the hall and up a flight of stairs, 2D was rummaging through his pockets for a lighter, huffing softly when he couldn't find one.
"Hey Russ, you don't have a light on you, do ya?" He frowned, looking up at the drummer. The larger man shook his head with a shrug. He didn't bother asking Noodle as he checked the pockets of his jacket that was slung on the kitchen table. He had just come home from a night out with Murdoc and desperately needed a smoke. He couldn't have one in the taxi and now he was feeling the urge for one.
He thought back to the last time he'd seen the thing and groaned when he remembered Murdoc trying to burn him with it outside the bar. He didn't have another on him and finding one in his room would take forever. At this point, Stuart would take a beating if it meant he could get it back and have a cigarette.

He took the stairs two at a time with his lanky legs and stopped outside the bassist's door, taking a breath before knocking softly.
"Hey, Murdoc... uh..." He frowned "You awake mate?"
When there was no reply, he knocked a little louder, the beginning of a headache tugging at the back of his black eyes. Again, no response.
"Oi Muds!" He called now, banging the door. The old man would have to answer eventually, quite possibly with a foul mood, but he would cross that bridge when he came to it.
However, when he hammered on the door with his fist and still didn't get a reply, he started to get nervous.
"Murdoc! Open the door!" He shouted, giving it a kick for good measure.

Murdoc was pulled every so slightly from his trip by a distant knocking. The sound seemed to echo around him and make the walls ripple with vibrations. This would be amazing to take whilst listening to music, but he was having trouble lifting his head right now, let alone reach his phone to play anything.
When suddenly a loud bang rang through him, sending shivers through his body. Murdoc gasped and groaned, forcing himself up as much as he could. His body felt like it was stuck in quicksand. He reached out to grab at the air, hitting it on the bedframe, but feeling nothing.
The banging got louder and louder, but all he could let out was more groans in response.
Finally, he managed to sit up, pushing himself in an attempt to stand. His left arm swung out and connected with something, Murdoc seeing it rather than feeling it. The distant crash of something ceramic breaking along with the ground rushing up to meet his face was a shock, earning a quite pitiful whimper from the satanist.

When 2D heard the commotion, he considered kicking the door in, the man sounded like he was in trouble. Before he tried he grabbed the handle, just in case and was surprised when it clicked open, the light of the hall revealing the state his bandmate was in.
It took him a moment to process it, but when he realized that the crumpled heap on the floor was his friend, he raced to his side.
"What's going on?" He gasped, trying to haul the man up, only to discover what had made the crashing noise. There had been a lamp on the man's bedside cabinet, it was now scattered accross the floor in quite impressive jagged pieces, one of the smaller parts still sticking out of Murdoc's left arm.
"Oh, shit" 2D gasped, watching thick rivers of blood pouring down the man's arm. He looked into the man's eyes and saw a calm, glazed expression, but did nothing to calm his own panic as he hauled him onto the bed. The blood quickly began to stain and then soak the sheet beneath him, something clicking in the singer's head that he needed to stop that bleeding and fast. The bassist's pale green skin looking almost blue. He glanced around him for something to use when his eyes landed on Murdoc's belt, not wasting any time, he grabbed at the buckle, pulling it from the loops in his pants.

However a world away in Murdoc's drugged out mind, there were a few bits missing from the recent events. He didn't remember 2D coming into his room, but he didn't remember him not being there either. Either he hadn't noticed his arm, or he just didn't care. He couldn't feel a thing, it was like looking at his singer when he was bleeding, it didn't affect him.
What did affect him, however, was the younger man suddenly tugging and pulling at his belt, the perspective telling him that he was at least laying on his back, with the bluenette towering over him.
The next few minutes, or hours, seemed to fade away into nothing as he let the high take him completely.

2D felt his stomach drop as Murdoc's eyes seemed to roll back into his head. In a moment of panic, he delivered a swift slap to the man's cheek in hopes of snapping him out of it. But when he didn't receive anything in return, he felt his eyes begin to sting. What had he taken? Was he dead? What should he do?
He did what any other useless idiot would do and ran to the door, screaming at the top of his lungs for his friend's help.
Russ appeared in seconds, red-faced and panting with Noodle at his heels.
"What? What's happening?" The larger man gasped.
"I dunno! I found him like this and bleeding! He's bleeding so much! I don't know what to do!?" 2D was screaming now without realizing, but the drummer placed a huge hand on his bony shoulder.
"2D, it's okay. Go and call an ambulance. Take noodle with you. It'll be okay" He soothed the man before moving to the bed. He tightened the makeshift tourniquet and began to check over his friend.
Noodle took the singer's hand and pulled him down the hall, pulling her phone from her pocket and handing it to him as she led him to her room where he could calm down.

Chapter Text

When Murdoc woke, he could feel every hair on his head, his skin hurt and the room was too bright even through his closed eyes. He tried to bring his hand up to shield them but felt a sharp sting run from his wrist to his shoulder when he moved. He forced his eyes open to stare at the bandages around his forearm, tinged with blood, with the clear outline of dark stitches against his skin.
His head spun round to look at the machines he was hooked up to, clearly, he had been here for some time. There was an IV bag almost empty, with an empty one beside it.
The old goth was about to shout when a nurse walked into the room, pushing her hair from her face. She jumped a little when she saw that her patient was awake, and looking a little wild for her liking.
"Oh, Mr. Niccals" She smiled sweetly, approaching his bed. "You gave us a bit of a scare there, how are you feeling?"
"Where am I?" he muttered, trying not to sneer at her forced smile. Any other time he'd be drooling all over her in her nursey getup, but his skull felt like it was trying to split, and he currently had stitches in his arm. The last thing he remembered was lying on his bed, with 2D taking off his pants and slapping him in the face, and he wanted his blood.
"You're in the hospital, your friends brought you in yesterday. I can call them for you, they're very worried" The nurse explained.
"They should be" Murdoc growled, sinking back against his pillow.

He knew he had taken something, he remembers coming home, but then there was just a blur, then 2D violating him, then another blur. What had happened that had resulted in him landing in the hospital. He prayed to Satan that 2D was dead or dying if not, he was going to make sure of it himself.
Within half an hour, Russel and Noodle were in his room, the older man had brought him a change of clothes, and Noodle brought a balloon.
"Where is he?" Murdoc snarled, earning a disapproving look from the drummer.
"He's at home, he's still really shaken up by the ordeal" The larger man sighed.
"Oh, I'll shake him up..."
"Daijōbudesuka?" Noodle frowned, placing a small hand on Murdoc's, pulling him from his rage for a moment.
"He's fine" Russel muttered to her "Don't worry, the nurse said we could take him home." The small girl smiled and produced his bag before asking for some money for the vending machine and disappearing down the hall.
"They told us what you had taken" The large man muttered now they were alone.
"I could've told you" Murdoc smirked, pulling out his cannular, pressing his bony fingers over the hole.
"What were you doing taking a stupid drug like that? What if 2D hadn't found you?" Russel frowned, crossing his huge arms.
"I'm not going into that right now, I just want to go home and... talk to that idiot"

When the taxi pulled up outside, 2D was already at the door, his fingers shaking almost violently as he lit another cigarette. His fingers were stained with how much he had been smoking since Murdoc was wheeled away in that ambulance.
The older man shuffled up the path and past him without so much as a nod. When they were all inside, he placed his hospital bag on the table and turned to Russel and Noodle.
"Do you mind taking this to your room? I don't think it'll look right in mine" He muttered to the small girl, handing her his balloon and glancing at the drummer for him to go with her.
When they were alone, 2D opened his mouth to speak but was quickly interrupted by a hand clamped firmly around his neck, causing him to let out a strangled scream.
"You shut your mouth!" Murdoc snarled, his eyes glowing with rage. "You're lucky I can't use my other hand because you'd be dead already!"
"What are you doing?! What did I do?!" 2D was sobbing already, took shaken to handle this right now.
"You better start fucking explaining last night or I swear the last thing you'll see is the wheels of my fucking car driving over your dumb face!"
"Y-you were off your face!" the taller man coughed, sniffling pitifully "You... you must've hit your arm on your light, you were bleeding everywhere! I thought you were dying!"
"What? So you decide that's your fucking chance to fuck me?!" Murdoc spat, the room suddenly falling dangerously silent.
It wasn't the pianist or the bassist that spoke next, but Russel as he entered the room.
"I beg your pardon?" He muttered, taking in the scene. Murdo's murderous expression turned on the larger man, willing him to leave before he got involved, but he continued to try and step between them.
"Stuart saved your life last night... I don't know anything about the other part"
"What are you on about?!" 2D spluttered, tears still streaming down his pale face.
"You were pulling my clothes off of me" Murdoc growled, "Hitting me and crawling over me!"
"I was trying to stop the bleeding! You lost consciousness!" The young man sobbed, finally crumpling against the wall, he no longer had the energy.

Something about 2D's reaction and Russel's expression took the wind out of his sails. The realization suddenly hit him that they were telling the truth, 2D really had been saving him last night. He pulled his hand away as if he had been burned, the singer crumpling to the ground, still shaking and whimpering quietly.
He suddenly felt sick, he didn't know what to say, so he did the only thing he could and disappeared to his room, leaving Russel to deal with the shaken young man.

Chapter Text

Murdoc stared into the dark space of his room, feeling something he didn't feel very often. Guilt.
How could he have thought that 2D was capable of something like that? The guy could barely hold a conversation, let alone sexually assault someone.
He didn't know how to move forward, what he should say or what he could do. He had no idea the man was so upset by the whole ordeal, he still didn't really have the facts. He needed to talk to the younger man and straighten things out, but the way he had folded in the kitchen made him worry about him. Something had definitely happened, and it had resulted in Murdoc waking up in hospital.
It couldn't have been the drugs, he hadn't taken that for quite some time, but he was no stranger to the world of illegal highs. He had even made sure to get home before he'd taken it, he wanted to be somewhere safe if he was taking what was essentially a tranquilizer.
Murdoc continued to wrack his brains over what he should do next, trying to ignore the painful, hangover-like ache in the back of his head.

Meanwhile, Russel had helped 2D back to his room, he needed a lay down and by the pained expression as he moved his head, some painkillers.
"I'm down the hall if you need me" His friend sighed before closing the door and leaving the young singer in the dark. After the moment had passed and his panic attack had subsided, 2D was left wrecked and empty feeling. How could he have thought such a thing? Like he would actually do that to anyone, not just the bassist. They were supposed to be friends... Sure Murdoc wasn't the nicest person, in fact, if he hadn't been screaming accusations, 2D probably wouldn't have been so surprised by the attack. But this was beyond reason.

Over the next few days, the men avoided each other, which wasn't too hard as Murdoc had locked himself away in his room, Russel figured he was just embarrassed, licking his wounds over accusing 2D. But when they received a call from the hospital, asking about Murdoc's stitches, it was time again to become worried. he was meant to have them cleaned yesterday, but they hadn't heard a peep from the man.
Noodle had tried to see him, sitting outside his door. But after a few hours had given up. The drummer even turned to 2D for his help, but the singer had been looking a little worse for wear lately.
There was no way he was going to tell his friends, but since that night, he had suffered from the worst nightmares. He didn't often dream, the painkillers saw to that, but something about the way his mind worked, and the real fear he'd felt in that moment had stuck. And now he was stuck in a loop of reliving that moment, again and again, watching as Murdoc's eyes slipped back into his head, and his breathing became dangerously shallow. Only it didn't stop there, in his nightmare, no-one came to help... there was no ambulance to wheel him away, there was no Russel to run to his side... 2D was alone, and no help to anyone...

When a week had rolled by since the incident, Russel decided to take things into his own hands, not even trying to knock on the older man's door but instead settling for kicking it in. The smell that met his nose forced him to bring his t-shirt up to his nose. He squinted through the darkness to see a figure hunched over on his bed, the clear outline of his bass guitar on his lap.
"Muds... you have to come to the hospital" He demanded, stepping in the room. "It's been a week and I know you haven't been taking care of that arm..." If the smell was anything to go by.
"Get out of my room..." Murdoc muttered quietly.
"It's a bit late for that" Russel growled, approaching the bed.
"I don't want to talk to you-Don't touch me!" He almost hissed, pulling his good arm away as Russel tried to grab for it.
"Come on, man. You need help. At least let me look at it!" The drummer frowned.
"Fuck off!" Murdoc snarled, baring his teeth. He had that wild look in his eyes again, and Russel was more worried about the bassist's safety than to push him further. He needed to find another way of doing this...
"Fine," He said simply, stepping back. "Let your arm rot, you'll never play again..."
And with that, he left, plunging the room into darkness as he closed the door behind him.

Murdoc sat there in silence, he knew Russel was right, he knew how stupid he was for not getting this sorted out. But he was scared...
Over his week of isolation, Murdoc had discovered a lot about himself. He had to wonder just why the idea of 2D doing what he did made him so angry. He had been scared of the idea of someone so close to him taking advantage... as horrible as he was to 2D, he was one of the only people he had ever called a friend... He had gone through more with him than anyone else, and with that came a great deal of trust...
Murdoc hadn't had the best childhood, in fact, he'd had a pretty awful one... He wasn't the type to play his own tiny violin, give the whole 'woe is me' attitude... But he had a shitty father and as a result, he had some serious issues when it came to trust, and just who he let close to him.

There were only two ways Murdoc accepted physical contact, and that was either sex or aggression. Those were the only two genuine forms of contact he'd really felt throughout his life. 2D had the awful habit of trying to be affectionate every now and again, and all it did was make his blood boil. Because in his mind, if they didn't want to sleep with him, and they didn't want to hurt him, then they wanted something far more sinister...
The only person he had allowed to get away with such behavior was Noodle, and even then, he tried to keep contact with her to a minimum... Deep in his dark mind he knew she'd grow to hate him and push him away or use him like everyone else...

Chapter Text

A few days after Russel's warning, Murdoc finally caved. His arm was swollen and the wound looked awful. He had grown used to the smell but knew that the issue was there, and that it certainly wasn't good. He had attempted to clean it with alcohol, but that had hurt far too much for him to attempt it again.
He finally called the larger man to his room.
"So you've decided not to sit here and rot?" He huffed, crossing his arm and looking down at the older man.
"Look... I need you..." Murdoc started, quickly fixing his tone. "Can you take Noodle somewhere today? Please... I don't want her to see me in this state..."
"She saw you looking a lot worse the other night..." Russel reminded him.
"I know... and I don't want her to see that again anytime soon. Please, can you take her out?"
"What about 2D?" The drummer asked, cocking his head a little.
"I'm going to talk to him..." Murdoc pouted.
He had never been able to argue with Russel, the man was far too calm and the authority in which he spoke made it difficult to argue.
"You just be careful how you talk to him... he's still upset" The younger man warned before turning to leave. "Maybe start with a thank you... and an apology"

When Murdoc heard the front door close, and Noodle's excited ramblings fade off down the street, he pushed himself to his feet and made his way down the hall to the singer's room.
He was going to just walk in, but he was trying to make an effort and stopped to knock.
The door opened almost immediately, but the mixture of emotions on the young man's face told Murdoc that maybe he regretted opening the door.
"Was I making too much noise?" He asked, "I'm sorry, I'll turn it down..."
It was only then that Murdoc noticed the barely-there sound of music coming from 2D's laptop.
"No, it's not that" Murdoc huffed, almost rolling his eyes. "I... need to ask you a favor"
"Oh," 2D blinked, ruffling his own shaggy blue hair. "Uh... sure? what's up?"
"I need to go to the hospital..." Murdoc held his arm behind him a little, almost trying to hide it like a guilty child.
"So... do you want me to call you a cab or something?" 2D frowned, cocking his head a little.
"No face-ache, I want you to come with me" Murdoc snipped, shaking his head a little. "I... I need someone there with me..."

2D was a little taken aback, what had happened in a week that had led to him asking for company? Was this all a setup? Where was he really going to take him?
"I need you to drive us there" Murdoc swallowed, which was a lie, he rarely used both hands when driving, but he needed the younger man with him all the same...
Murdoc couldn't stand people looking after him, he always believed that they were up to something, they wanted something or they were going to take advantage of him... and that sentiment extended to doctors.
He had been lucky that he was out cold when he had been taken to the hospital, normally he had to be off his face to deal with it... Then he could act out of sexual frustration or anger before they had a chance.
"Alright then" 2D nodded, shakily, grabbing his keys and jacket before heading out the door with him.

Neither of them spoke during the car ride, Murdoc settling for finding a radio station that didn't drill into his skull. He had never felt so awkward around someone he considered a friend. He still needed to thank him... and apologize for that he did. But he also needed to ask 2D what really happened that night.
But every time he tried to open his mouth, no sound would come out, he just stared out of the window at the other cars passing by.
Meanwhile, the younger man had to bit his tongue to keep himself from talking, he wanted to question the man, he wanted to shout, he wanted to cry.
As the car ground to a halt in the midday traffic, he let out an exhausted sigh.
"Bored?" Murdoc muttered, his eyes fixed on something in the distance.
"Tired really..." 2D yawned as if to prove it. "Been thrown off my routine a little..." That was total bollocks, 2D didn't have a sleep pattern, he was either out cold or awake for days at a time.
"Well, as soon as this arm's cleaned up, we'll get back to work" The satanist swallowed, glancing over at the driver's seat. They still hadn't moved from their spot and the car was feeling almost suffocating with just the two of them in a forced silence. This was fate's way of telling them to talk...

"Thank you..." the older man almost whispered, his throat almost trying to stop the words from coming out.
2D took a moment to process the words before turning sharply.
"What for?" he blinked, eyebrows furrowed in confusion.
"You know what for" Murdoc growled, turning away just as quickly.
"For driving you to the hospital?" the young man guessed.
"For saving me, idiot!" The old goth snapped, shaking his head. "I mean... yeah... thank you"
"You don't have to thank me, Murdoc... I didn't have a choice" 2D frowned. "I couldn't leave you like that..."
This was a good chance to find out things properly, without shouting.
"So... what do you remember happening?" He asked, drumming his fingers on his thigh, outwardly looking annoyed, but inside his stomach was twisting in knots as he willed the courage.
"Well.." 2D frowned, playing with the steering wheel a little. "I remember getting back from the pub with you, and you went to your room... but I remembered you'd taken my lighter, and I really wanted it, so I came to find you and there were these weird noises coming from your room... and I've heard some pretty strange noises from your room before but... this was different, I don't know why..."
Murdoc just nodded along, staring out of the window again.
"And I found you..." The young man had to pause to steady his voice again. "I found you on the floor... and you were bleeding so much" His own stomach churned at the memory, trying to shake it from his aching head. "And I couldn't get a response from you... so I took your belt and tried to stop the bleeding, but you were just so pale..." Murdoc turned as he heard 2D's voice break a little, giving a shaky breath before continuing. "And when your eyes did that weird thing, I... I thought you were dead"
The car fell into that heavy and uncomfortable silence again as Murdoc processed his words. Had it really been that bad? Was 2D really that upset by the idea of him being hurt? No... there had to be something else behind it, there was always something else behind it, something that affected the other man... He supposed without him, the bad would fall to pieces and 2D would have to go on to something else... He was scared about his own future... He couldn't possibly be worried about him...
Suddenly something pulled him from his own dark thoughts, a small sniffle. He turned to look at the young man again, an unpleasant chill running through him as he realized that 2D was crying. Not properly, there weren't any tears, but his eyes had welled up and he had started to shake with silent hiccups.

Chapter Text

The hours that they had spent in the hospital went down as one of the worst days Murdoc had had in a very long time. He already had to deal with the sick feeling in his gut as the nurse prodded and pulled him about, lecturing him over the state of his wound, threatening him with blood poisoning and amputation, but that didn't really matter, not now he had 2D sitting in the room with him with that empty and distraught expression.
The man had nearly broken down in the car... Why had he been so upset?
Just when he thought the torture was over, the nurse turned to the singer.
"I need you to keep an eye on your friend, clearly he doesn't understand the risk of infection that he's exposing himself to. You'll need to help him clean around the area at least once a day. If there are signs of weeping or anything like that, try to gently clean that away. There are antibiotics as well, he'll need to take them before we can sort out the damaged stitches."
2D nodded along to what the nurse was saying, but Murdoc knew he wasn't listening.

When they arrived home, 2D placed the bag of supplies they'd been given on the table and turned to his friend. He still wanted to talk, even though he knew he'd start crying, he wanted to get things off his chest. He was mad at Murdoc for being too reckless, he was mad at himself for being so useless... And there was something clearly going on with the older man, why did he always assume the worst? Did he not see 2D the way he saw him? Probably not... the man probably didn't have friends, didn't see the need for them... But 2D relied heavily on his friends for help, and as much as he fought the man, as much as he insulted him back, he did care about Murdoc, and he really did look up to him in many ways. Some ways, he didn't want to admit right now, those thoughts were pushed far, far to the back of his mind. He didn't need feelings like that surfacing right now.

Murdoc was about to make himself a cup of tea and slink off to his room when a sharp pain shot through his bad arm, causing him to drop the mug he had been holding.
"Let me do it for you" 2D offered but yelped as Murdoc smacked his hand away.
"I'm not a fucking invalid, I can do it myself!" He snapped, flicking on the kettle and throwing the mug onto the side. "Just fuck off, like you care anyway..."
2D stared in silence for a moment before muttering. "I do care.."
"No you don't, you care because without me, you'd still be working in that shithole of a shop with your uncle"
"Without you, I wouldn't have two fractured fucking eyes, but I'm still here!" 2D yelled back. "Why have you got to be such a dick all the time, I'm just trying to help you"
"Because it's all rubbish, no-one wants to help me. Why would anyone want to help me?" THe older man huffed, grabbing for the mug again and punching the cabinet with his good hand as that same pain shot accross his infected stitches.
They stood in silence again as Murdoc slowly continued making himself tea, no longer trying to use his bad arm.
"I have stuff you can take for the pain..." 2D offered quietly.
"I don't want any painkillers... I've had enough of doctors and medicine for one day.." Murdoc grumbled.
"I have other stuff for pain..." the young man offered again, pushing his hands into his pockets.
Murdoc turned to his friend and sighed, nodding a little before following him to his room.

That's how the two of them ended up slumped against 2D's bed, passing a joint between each other, in a slightly less awkward silence. Murdoc felt a little more relaxed now, he still had that knotted feeling in his stomach, but at least the aches in his body and the stinging in his arm had subsided. He let his head fall back against the bed and closed his eyes.
2D wasn't a bad kid, and the more he thought and the more he processed what had happened over the past week, he started to believe that he was telling the truth...
But as Murdoc considered it, another painful realization hit him... 2D had the look of a god, and the voice of an angel... he was a very handsome man and one day he was going to take over the world... for now, all Murdoc could do was hold on for the ride... He wasn't going to be able to keep up forever...
If he dared to let down those walls, even just a little, he knew he was only going to get hurt...
He tried desperately to stay awake, but 2D had turned on something slow and mellow, and he slowly began to feel himself drifting away.

Of course, he wasn't going to dream about anything good, he never did...
Murdoc found himself stood in his childhood living room, his uniform tie hanging loosely around his neck as he watched his father on the phone.
"Yeah, I'll be there tonight... yeah my son is going to be singing"
The young Murdoc felt a swell of pride hearing his dad talking about him, he had just come home from a shit day of school, so it was nice to hear something positive about himself...
"Muds, go and get me a beer, yeah?" His dad muttered, pulling the phone away from his face for a second before returning to his call.
"yeah, voice of an angel, that boy..." Murdoc heard his dad say as he wandered into the kitchen. He was about to walk back into the living room when he caught his dad chuckling darkly to whatever was said on the other end.
"Yeah I know... shame about the face... he can thank his mother for that" Murdoc frowned, pausing just behind the doorway.
"Don't worry about that... I've got something he can wear, even if they don't like his singing, it'll still be a laugh"
And a laugh it certainly was, just not for Murdoc.
He suddenly found himself in the toilets of the local pub, being forced into his costume by his dad.
"Dad stop, please" the boy pleaded, "I don't want to do this, no"
"You keep saying no to me, boy, I'll let you know about it" His father snarled, gripping his arm like a vice. "Now you're going to get up on that stage, and you're going to perform exactly what we practiced if you want a home to come back to tonight"

Murdoc was suddenly woken by a hand on his shoulder. He jumped back as far as he could, still leaning against the bed, gasping as if he had been burned.
"What the fuck are you doing?!" He choked out, his eyes wide and panicked.
"You looked like something was wrong with you..." 2D frowned, pulling his hand away. "Are you alright?"
The older man shook his head, screwing his eyes shut. "I'm fine... just leave me alone..."
He quickly pushed himself to his feet and staggered down the hall to his own room, where he locked himself away for the rest of the night.

Chapter Text

Murdoc curled up on his bed again, his eyes screwed shut as he tried to block everything out. He hadn't thought about that night in quite some time... The humiliation still stinging him, he swore he'd never let anyone take advantage of him like that again... never trust anyone. His father had used him countless times for his talent and was just as quick to throw him aside when he didn't need the money. This was precisely why he couldn't afford to let 2D any closer... he couldn't handle feeling like that again...
The old man almost bit through his own tongue trying to will his eyes not to water, he felt that unwelcome sting of tears and it sent a chill through his body.

2D ran his fingers through his hair, again and again, trying to work out what had just happened. Why had Murdoc said those things before? That no-one cared about him... Everyone cared about him, his friends constantly worried about him... Surely he knew that, right? He turned the volume up on his laptop and let the sound of Iron and Wine drift through his room, letting himself fall back on his bed as he tried to process things, despite another headache gripping his temples.
He allowed himself to think about all the things he had pushed to the back of his mind today, he allowed the pain of seeing Murdoc unhappy tug at his heart and make his body ache. He wanted to pull him close and make him feel as loved as he was.
He sighed deeply and rolled onto his stomach, pulling the pillows on his bed close as he tried to sleep. He'd think of something... he didn't have to tell him how he felt, but he needed to get through to the man somehow...

Murdoc couldn't escape 2D the next day, being woken around midday with the threat of calling Russel to help. 2D had made him a cup of tea and brought his painkillers, along with some alcohol wipes to clean the wound.
"I can do this myself" The bassist growled.
"No you can't" 2D muttered, focusing on the task of cleaning, making sure not to touch the stitches, or prod at the swelling too much. "That's why I'm doing it..."
"Ow!" he growled, feigning pain to get him to stop, considering just shoving the young man away from him, but as he raised his hand, he couldn't bring himself to do it...
"How did you sleep?" the bluenette asked, glancing up at his friend, trying to keep the conversation going, he couldn't handle any more awkward silences.
"Fine" Murdoc lied, looking away at anything else in the room. He hadn't slept badly, but the subject of his dreams was too much for him to handle right now.
After such an awful memory coming to the surface, he had dreamed about possibly one of the happiest memories he had.
It wasn't a particularly special day, just a sunny day in August, between recordings and tours. They were sat on the roof of Kong Studios, Russel and 2D playing with Noodle as he drank his beer in silence.
2D had been chasing the girl when he had tripped, spilling his beer all over him. He remembered the young man almost cowering in fear as he rose to his feet, looking at his ruined clothes. There had been a tense moment before Murdoc's eyes met 2D's, he threw the rest of his beer over the young man with a smirk, watching as his expression shifted from fear to annoyance, to that devilish grin. He had quickly grabbed another can from the cooler, shaking it up before pulling the tab on it, spraying all over the bassist.
They had all proceeded to soak each other with whatever had been left on ice, all of them getting sticky, but all roaring with laughter by the end of it...
He couldn't remember being so happy, so carefree and alive... And that truly saddened him. He didn't have happy childhood memories of playing with friends, no fun recollections of his days in school.
2D's voice pulled him from his thoughts.
"I think we need to talk..."

Chapter Text

2D stared at the bassist, his eyebrows knitted together as he thought about how he was going to word what he needed to say.
"What did you mean last night?" he asked. "That no-one cared about you?"
Muyrdoc would've given anything to not have this conversation, but he was still too tired to get up, and 2D was in his room. he had no-where to hide.
"Because they don't..." Murdoc swallowed.
"Of course they do, Muds, we all care about you." 2D frowned. "I csre about you..."
"You don't! No-one cares about me, all they care about is themselves" The older man groaned, yanking his arm away as 2D reached for it.
"What gives you that idea? How could you possibly think that?"
"Look! I don't owe you any explanations for thinking what I think, alright?!" Murdo snapped "I'm not going to apologize for having trust issues, they're the ones that still treated me like shit, even after I gave them everything!"
2D frowned, pausing for a moment before asking.
"Who?..."
Murdoc bit back a sigh, shaking his head for a moment, feeling sick to his stomach as he bared all. he was leaving himself too open, but he couldn't go back now, not after he'd just run his mouth.
"Everyone..." he swallowed "Everyone in my life..."
"You've got me" 2D offered, earning a bitter chuckle from the older man.
"Yeah, and no matter what you'll do, I'll never trust you..."
"Why not?" the young man frowned.
"Because you'll just hurt me... like everyone else" He quickly added "Not intentionally... you wouldn't have that in you... but you'll still leave, and you'll take everything I've invested in you away... and I won't exist anymore"
That was almost poetic, but 2D couldn't believe what he was hearing. Did he really believe that he was going to abandon him?
"Where could I go?" the blue-haired man muttered, reaching out once more to touch his hand. Murdoc pulled away quickly, hissing as he jerked his bad arm too. "You're my best friend, Muds... and possibly even more than that..."
Murdoc looked up at the singer, his hair was still a mess, and in the dim light of his room, he still looked more handsome and more perfect than anyone he'd ever seen before...
"I'm asking you to trust me..." He swallowed, trying once more to reach out and take his friend's hand, suppressing a grin when he didn't pull away this time.
"Please... for the love of Satan... don't be like everyone else" Murdoc choked, staring down at their hands.


After that moment they shared in Murdoc's room, things seemed to ease up a little in the house. Murdoc spent less time in his room, instead settling for sitting in the recording room or the living room, watching TV with Noodle.
2D managed to get back to a reasonable sleep pattern, and everyone was getting along pretty well. Until the day came for Murdoc to have his stitches to finally be taken out. It had healed quite quickly after the infection had cleared, the nurse commending 2D on his work keeping it clean and seen to.
2D couldn't help but focus on the way Murdoc's body language had shifted from his relaxed state in the car. He was rigid, his eyes fixed on the middle distance as the stitches were removed. The area had been numbed, perhaps he was scared of medical stuff? It shocked him to see the man scared of anything, but he supposed it wasn't a strange fear to have.

When they were back in the car, 2D brought it up.
"Do you not like nurses then?" He mumbled, turning the radio down a little.
"No" Murdoc said quickly, pulling his sleeve down over the forming scar.
"Why's that, then?" the younger man pushed, tutting as the car ground to a halt in the traffic.
"Just don't... like being touched" Murdoc huffed, staring out the window at anything, trying to distract himself from what was happening.
"That's a lie, you've normally got women hanging off of every limb..." 2D chuckled.
"Not like that... it's different with them" The bassist growled before correcting his tone a little. "It's... it's to do with the trust thing..."
"But it's her job to look after you" 2D pointed out. "She's not doing anything to take advantage... even if she was, I reckon you could take her" He chuckled, trying to lighten the mood a little, he couldn't help but feel a swell of pride that the man had shared that with him.
2D had been a lot less scared of the dreams he had been having lately, none of them would he dare share with his friend, but now that there was that level of trust, he felt comfortable with them in the security of his own mind, at least.
"Noods wants a movie night tonight, you're welcome to join us" The young man offered, looking at Murdoc's expression shift from detached, to trying not to smile.

He had joined them in the end, halfway through the film, 2D felt the sofa cushions shift beside him, glancing over to see Murdoc getting himself comfortable, his wounded arm hidden by a soft grey sweater 2D had never seen before. It was so unlike anything from his wardrobe that he had to take a moment to stare. He looked nice like this, comfortable and warm. He knew it was dangerous feeling so happy and open to the older man, he was likely to snap back to his old ways anytime soon, but he wanted to enjoy this while it lasted.
When the film was finally over, Russel picked up the now sleeping Noddle and wished the two men goodnight as he carried her off to her room.
Murdoc reached for the remote and flicked through a few channels before giving up and letting himself zone out for a little.
2D, on the other hand, couldn't wait to get back to his room, after watching the way the older man shifted and slouched in that soft sweater had started doing things to him. The fabric catching on the few angles the older man still had, while softening areas like his stomach and usually hunched up shoulders.
"I'll see you in the morning" 2D coughed awkwardly, getting to his feet and shuffling off to his room, making sure the door was locked behind him.

Chapter Text

Murdoc couldn't help but note 2D's departure, staring at the doorway he'd disappeared through. It wasn't like him to have such an early night when he got the TV to himself. He knew the kid didn't have anything decent to watch anything on in his bedroom. He wondered if he'd made him uncomfortable, but quickly pushed those thoughts down. He had desperately tried to accept 2D's attention and friendship, and he hated to admit he hadn't felt this happy for quite some time. There hadn't been anything to upset him lately, even the occasional writers' block seemed to just frustrate him, having the younger man's presence to calm him.
He shook his head a little, turning back to the TV before switching it off, leaving him in the dark for a few minutes. He had had a tiring day and didn't feel like leaving the kid alone, surely he wouldn't kick him out if he went to bother him?
Murdoc's curiosity getting the best of him, he hauled himself to his feet, feeling the soft knit of his sweater catching on his fresh stitches and making him groan. He rolled that sleeve up a little, no longer having to hide the injury from the others as he approached 2D's door. He lifted a hand to knock when he heard some shifting on the other side of the door, followed by a quiet groan. He pressed his ear to the wood and listened in silence, wondering what the kid was doing.

On the other side, 2D had his back pressed to the door, his shirt pushed up to his armpits and his trousers pushed barely halfway down his thighs. He hadn't opted for his bed, knowing if he laid down now, he'd fall asleep, and he wanted to enjoy how much his mind was racing for just a little longer. He arched away from the cool surface as he wrapped his hand around himself a little tighter, far too turned on and frustrated to take things slow. Murdoc hadn't seemed in the mood to do anything tomorrow, he had all morning to enjoy slow...
His mind drifted back to Murdoc lounging on the couch, imagining what he would look like in only that soft sweater, barely long enough to retain his modesty. He pictured the older man tugging at the hem, the stretch of the knit revealing his length hardening under 2D's gaze. He had seen the way he stared sometimes, well... the way he imagined Murdoc stared at him sometimes... he would easily be staring through the boy into the wall behind him, but that intense, burning stare always sent pleasant shivers to the base of his skull.
"Fuck" Stuart gasped, reaching up a little to tug at his own hair, his imagination flitting from one fantasy to the next, now picturing himself under the bassist, one hand tangled in his blue hair, the other holding his jaw open as he fucked his throat in a fit of frustration and anger.
He had a few sick thoughts like that, wondering if he could calm the man if he let him use him like his plaything... they were short-lived though as he remembered the sting of actually being hit by the man.
His hand trailed down to pinch one of his already hardened nipples, scratching a little as he moved to the other. All the while still rocking his hips into his tight fist.

Murdoc knew exactly what he was listening to, and he felt dirty... he felt something trying to pull him away, but at the same time, he didn't want to miss a single harsh breath or creak of the wood as he heard 2D getting himself off on the other side.
He trailed his bad arm down his front, almost surprised by his own hardness, but he couldn't do much about it without hurting himself. He was using his good arm to support his weight against the door, straining his ears to try and hear anything else that might give him a clearer mental image of what Stuart was doing.
Luckily there was a sudden gasp, followed by a loud bang, causing the door to shake. Thinking quickly, he fell against the door, propped on his bad side, his free hand free to push into the waistband of his jeans. He was about to completely give in and wrap a hand around his growing erection when he heard his name whimpered, completely snapping him out of his thoughts. He looked around for a moment, unsure of where his name had come from, a cold chill running through him at the thought of someone else catching him like this. But when he realized that it had come from the other side of the door, he turned, pressing his ear once more to the wood.
With the fog of arousal cleared from his head, he tried to focus in on the sounds again, this time only being able to make out Stuart's whimpers and occasional sighs, broken up every so often with his name.
Then paranoia began to set in, all those lovely images in his head being replaced by the thought of the young man curled against his door crying. The longer he stood there, the more distraught he sounded.
He was torn, should he knock? What if he was wrong? What if he had heard wrong?... What if he really was crying about him? Why would he possibly be crying about him?... Only one way to find out.

Chapter Text

2D could feel a headache blossoming behind his eyes from hitting his head against the door, but he could care less as he felt that wonderful ache in his balls, feeling so close to the edge. He started to let out a choked cry as he came when there was a loud knock beside his head, causing him to yelp in shock, his ruined orgasm causing another ache to set in. He tried to sit in silence for a second, his clean hand coming up to mask his panting, hoping whoever it was would go away, but there was another bang, followed by the last voice Stuart wanted to hear right now.
"What the bloody hell are you doing in there?" Murdoc asked, shortly followed by "are you alright?" He sounded upset, and the young man realized maybe he had bolted a little too suddenly earlier.
2D kicked himself mentally, quickly pulling his jeans up and pushing down his shirt, too panicked to really do either properly as he pulled the door open.
Murdoc looked a little relieved when he saw the young man, but his expression suddenly changed as he took in his appearance. It was only then that the bluenette thought to look himself over, feeling his cheeks almost burn as he realized that not only was his quickly softening cock still visible above the waistband of his jeans but that he was covered in his own come, staining his shirt.

Well, that answered that question, Murdoc thought to himself, biting back a grin. He schooled his expression into one of genuine concern, trying to maintain eye contact.
"Sorry for interrupting..." He muttered.
Anyone else would just walk away, allow their friend to maintain some dignity, but the older man was rooted to the spot, part of him desperate to run back to his room, lock himself away. The other part of him wanting to pin the kid down and drag every dirty thought that was going through his head out to the surface.

2D quickly pulled his top over himself when he had realized the situation, cheeks still glowing a beautiful shade of pink. He looked into the bassist's mismatched eyes and tried to stand his ground.
"Alright..." he swallowed finally, shuffling his feet. "Is everything okay?" wondering how Murdoc had heard him, he hadn't been that loud, had he?
"Yeah..." Murdoc nodded, eyes flicking down for a second too long. "Just... yeah"
It was 2D's turn for his eyes to wander, raking his black sockets over that damned sweater, the thing that had gotten him into this mess.
"Well... I'll let you get back to what you were- wait, what are you doing?" Murdoc stiffened as the young man reached out, his fingers brushing the soft fabric.
"It's soft..." the man muttered under his breath, eyes flicking up to gauge Murdoc's reaction. He was already dying of embarrassment, what was a little more to finish him off? "How come I've never seen you in this before?"
"I've worn it before," Murdoc said offhandedly, praying his hands didn't stray lower, still feeling his cock straining against his fly.
"Not in front of me..." 2D huffed. "It looks good..."
"Thanks?" Murdoc blinked, feeling his own cheeks heat when Stuart's hand began to move. "Listen, I am sorry for interrupting... I'm gonna go to bed now" He tried to turn and flee, but 2D's hand brushed against his crotch, and their eyes met for an awkward second that stretched on far too long.
"Okay" Stuart blinked, pulling his hand away and closing the door in his face.
What in the name of sweet satan had he just landed himself in?...

Neither of them got much sleep that night, 2D wondering if he had really felt what he thought he had... and Murdoc praying that the kid hadn't noticed.
The old goth pretended to be asleep when there was a soft knock on his door at 10 am on the dot, 2D with his medication and clean dressings for his arm if they were still needed.
He cursed himself inwardly as the door opened, too distracted to lock it last night.
The young man padded into the room, pulling one side of the curtains aside, Murdoc noting that the sun didn't hit his face, his heart aching a little at the thought of the kid not wanting to blind him when he 'woke up'.
"Muds..." Stuart muttered, kicking the bed frame a little, placing his supplies on the bedside table. Murdoc cracked open an eye to see a cup of tea also sitting beside him.
"Murdoc wake up..." 2D sighed, kicking the bed a little more forcefully. Hopefully, he would give up and wait until later... or at least that's what he thought, before a hand wrapped around his good arm and gave him a little shake.
"Come on... I need to look at that arm"
He couldn't play dead any longer so took a moment or two, giving a show of yawning and stretching out on his mattress. He sat up and rubbed his eyes, watching as 2D found a chair underneath a mountain of clothes, pulling it over to the bed.
"The nurse said I wouldn't have to change it that much now that you've been taking care of it" he explained, already reaching to look at the wound, eyes not meeting the bassist's.

Chapter Text

Murdoc held out his arm, watching the younger man wrapping a hand around his wrist and pulling it into the light. He knew he should talk about last night, clear the air between the two of them... but the thought of the man bolting was too terrifying for him to consider. Luckily, the kid surprised him by asking himself.
"So what do we do about last night?" he muttered, pulling an alcohol wipe from the table and tearing it open before swabbing around the stitches where they had wept a little. Murdoc cleared his throat a little before answering.
"I think... I mean, what do you think happened last night?" he wanted to know what page they were both on before running his mouth.
"I think... you caught me in a pretty... embarrassing way," 2D said carefully, popping a painkiller out of its blister pack and handing it to him with his tea.
"What else?" Murdoc pressed, taking the cup from him and swallowing the pill.
"And...I think" he muttered, looking out of the window for a second before adding. "You enjoyed it..."
"You think?" Murdoc mumbled his tone even and unreadable.
"Yeah... I think... you heard something and liked it" 2D explained.
Murdoc stared at the back of the younger man's head for a while, choosing his words carefully.
"What did I hear?" he asked, watching 2D tense for a moment before scanning the room once more. His eyes landed on that bastard sweater on the floor again, reaching down to pick it up, he ran his fingers over it as he spoke.
"I was saying your name..." he admitted, ready for Murdoc to hate him, throw him out of his room. he was ready for everything to go back to normal.
"You're right" Murdoc whispered, pulling him from his thoughts.
"What?" he asked, his heart suddenly thudding in his chest.
"You're right, I heard you say my name..." He explained. "I heard a few things... I knew what you were doing... and didn't at the same time, it's confusing... but... Yeah... for a moment, I enjoyed what I heard"
"And you're okay with that?" 2D asked.
"Not at all," The older man said quickly. "It makes me terrified... all of it"
"Why?" The bluenette muttered, unable to hide a smile.
"Because..." Murdoc huffed, shaking his head. "This is a really awkward conversation to be having with no clothes on" He muttered, changing the subject, but bringing 2D to the realization that Murdoc was naked, aside from his blanket. He quickly handed over the sweater, watching as he pulled it over his head.

Murdoc didn't want to have this conversation, he had already opened himself up too much, lifted his hopes way too high, and they were all about to come crashing down around him. There was no way 2D was really interested in him, not in the way he was in the younger man. Sure he could be sexy, but not like this... not full of stitches and medication... you couldn't be alluring when you needed to be cleaned with disinfectant every morning...
"Why are you scared, Murdoc?" 2D frowned, leaning in a little.
The older man made a pained sort of noise in his throat before answering.
"Because... when you one day take over this world... and you have everything... it won't matter what I like... how I feel..." He almost whispered. "Because you won't want me"
"We went over this" Stuart pointed out. "I'm not going anywhere... not without you..."
"It doesn't matter... you can't stop it..." Murdoc shook his head.
"Stop it" Stuart almost snapped, but his tone remained calm. He reached over and took Murdoc's good hand, pulling it a little closer. "You've told me a lot of stuff in the past few weeks... and I've listened to them all, and never really asked anything back... but you need to stop this. You are loved, Murdoc... by a lot of people... and not because of what they can get out of you..." He gave the older man a small smile. "You're a total bastard at the best of times, and if we didn't care, we wouldn't help you... do you realize what you've done to me?..."
"Yeah... and you're fucking sick for hanging around for so long..." Murdoc swallowed, glancing up into those pitch black orbs that served as a reminder every day of just how poorly he'd treated 2D... Sometimes he didn't care, sometimes he wondered why he didn't do more... but there were times where he'd stop and think, and really regret his actions...

"I told you that you were more than a friend to me... that's why you heard me saying your name" 2D swallowed. "No-one can compare to you... I'd drop anyone in a heartbeat... just to have you once" He felt a little embarrassed saying that while holding hands, so he let go, but kept his hand on the bed, close by.
"You were really thinking about me last night?" Murdoc sighed, Stuart, nodding a little. "Why?"
"That fucking sweater..." 2D chuckled darkly, making Murdoc blink in surprise. "It looks... really good on you"
"You're fucking weird..." Murdoc chuckled, looking down at himself. He never wore this sweater because it was soft... it was something he wore when he was upset, or unwell... it was a comfort to him... he never saw it as possibly being sexual.
"You asked..." 2D smirked, shaking his head.
"So... you got the hots for me in a bloody jumper... was this... the first time?" That was a dangerous question.
"No... not at all" Stuart sighed.
"How often...?" Murdoc blinked, trying to suppress the pleasant tingles at the thought of Stuart regularly touching himself with him in mind.
"Uh... a couple of nights a week... it's less when you're being a twat... but... yeah" He admitted. "So?..."
"So?" Murdoc blinked, not on the same train of thought as the kid.
"Did you like what you heard last night?"
Murdoc bit his lip a little, looking at the man through his lashes.
"What kind of stupid question is that?" he asked, watching as Stuart's cheeks flushed a little. "You've got a voice like an angel... and hearing it moan my name like that was like music..."
"I knew you were hard" 2D swallowed, a little flushed at being complimented like that.
"Do you mean then, or now?" Murdoc muttered, shifting his legs a little.
2D blinked in surprise, his cheeks flushing a shade deeper.

Chapter Text

The pair of them were pulled from their conversation as Russel entered the room, wondering why 2D had been gone for so long without there being another noise.
The two had pulled away quickly, 2D explaining that they had started working on a few ideas for a music video.
The larger man had shrugged it off but asked 2D for his help with something in the kitchen, reluctantly pulling him from Murdoc's room.
The older man smirked, waiting a moment before getting to his feet and locking the door before sitting back on his bed. He let the conversation sink in a little and felt his headache with the possibility of Stuart actually having feelings for him... had he really been that scared for so long of another person caring about him?... He desperately tried to ignore that nagging doubt in the back of his mind, for now, wanting to enjoy the new information he'd been given.
He laid back on his pillows and allowed his sweater to ride up on his stomach, reminding him of what Stu had said. He ran a hand down his bare stomach, playing with the trail of hairs for a second before wrapping around the base of his cock, giving it a few lazy pulls. He couldn't go out there in this state... it would be indecent, he reasoned, bringing his hand to his mouth for a moment, licking a stripe up his palm before turning it to his length, squeezing at the base for a second before setting a steady rhythm.
He let his head fall back and enjoyed the feelings rushing through him.

Russell had wanted 2D to try to fix the microwave, ending in a short-lived argument. neither of them had the electrical skills to fix it, even though Russell insisted that the younger man knew how, he was just playing dumb.
Stuart groaned, rubbing his eyes a little as a headache started to settle in. He gave the plug one last look before screwing it back together and wondering where he'd left his painkillers. A small smile tugged at his lips as he remembered they were in Murdoc's room. He pushed the appliance aside and shuffled back down the hall, grabbing the handle and giving a small knock before trying to open it, only to have the lock click as it wouldn't budge.
"Murdoc?" He muttered, knocking just as softly, wondering if he'd gone back to sleep.

Fuck, Murdoc groaned, glancing up. He hadn't been paying enough attention to know who'd said his name, but he had heard something at his door. He sat up a little and tugged his sweater over himself.
"What?" he groaned, his voice sounding gruff.
"it's just me... I wanted my painkillers" Stuart explained on the other side.
A smirk split accross the bassist's face as he got to his feet, padding over to the door and pressing his forehead against the wood.
"I'm a little busy" He swallowed, allowing his sweater to ride up once more as he resumed what he was doing.
"Oh..." Stuart swallowed, innocently adding. "I can come back later..."
"For fuck sake..." Murdoc huffed on the other side of the door, causing 2D to understand the situation.
"Y-you're?..." he swallowed thickly, feeling his face flush. "O-oh..."
"You sound shocked... we were literally talking about it about ten minutes ago..." Murdoc muttered, his voice catching a little every now and then as he twisted his wrist on the upstroke.
"I know... but" Stuart muttered, biting his lip as he pressed his ear to the door. "Can I come in?"
"Why would I do that?" Murdoc grinned, rocking into his palm a little faster.
"I... please?" The young man muttered, feeling his own cock twitch in his jeans.
"What do I get if I let you in?... seems a little-ah!... one sided-fuck!..." The bassist moaned, feeling his hand become slick with pre-come as he collected what was leaking from the tip.
"Muds... come on" 2D whined, trying the handle again.
"You think you're just getting a free show?" Murdoc chuckled breathlessly. "You'd like that... seeing me in only my sweater..."
"You're still wearing it" Stuart blinked, his cock throbbing a little more insistently now. "Please Muds... let me in... I'll do something in return..."
"What?" Murdoc grinned.
"Don't... I can't say it out here... what if someone hears?" he hissed, hearing Russel banging about in the kitchen again.
"Well, I can't hear anything" Murdoc teased, silently reaching down to unlock the door, praying to Satan that the kid would cave.
And sure enough...
"I'll suck you off... I'll... I'll let you finish in my mouth. Please" He begged, hearing the door creak a little as Murdoc's movements sped up a little.

The door suddenly opened, causing 2D to yelp in surprise as he was dragged inside, the door closing just as quickly and the lock slid into place.
The young man stood there in shock for a second before taking in the man in front of him.
Murdoc's face was flushed, that soft sweater ridden up around his waist, with his now angry looking erection bobbing between his legs.
The older man hadn't quite expected that answer, but the image had been so exciting that it had taken all of his willpower not to just blow his load there and then.
"Don't touch me... not yet" Murdoc swallowed harshly, wrapping a hand around himself to relieve the throbbing.
"Christ..." Stuart muttered, feeling his own cock aching, after his orgasm last night being ruined, he would do anything to have Murdoc touch him now.
"Take your shirt off..." The older man instructed, watching as 2D pulled his t-shirt over his head and threw it on the floor, reaching down to cup himself a little. The satanist admired the hard outline of his friend's length, wondering just how big he was...
Finally, he felt like he wasn't about to bust and motioned for 2D to get on his knees, biting his lip in frustration as the kid looked up at him through his lashes.
"You don't have to do this you know..." Murdoc swallowed.
"It was my idea" The bluenette reminded him, sliding his hands up his exposed thighs.
"Yeah..." the older man nodded, wrapping a hand around the base of his cock, wanting nothing more but to paint that pretty face. "You ever did this before?"
"Had a few..." He muttered in response, earning a small frown from Murdoc, but still a swell of pride that he was the man's first... He decided to let him decide on the pace, stroking himself a little to relieve the ache that was beginning to become painful.
"Go on then..." He gasped.

Stuart reached up, wrapping his fingers around the older man's bony hips, wrapping his lips around the tip and relishing the salty taste against his tongue. The weight was heavy on his tongue, and he could feel himself throbbing against his jeans, now stretched tight over his lap.
"Sweet satan..." Murdoc groaned, wanting to let his head fall back, but not wanting to miss a second of those large black eyes staring up at him, watching as he took at least half of his length in one go. He kept his hand wrapped around the base of his cock as a way of stopping himself from choking the poor boy.
But Start had other ideas, being able to suppress his gag reflex as he took him deeper and deeper, hollowing his cheeks as he pulled back. He gave a little moan of encouragement, wanting to feel Murdoc using his mouth.
"You stop... if it becomes too much... you hear me?" Murdoc huffed, letting his hips fall into a shallow rhythm, but suddenly his hips were being pulled harder by Start's hands, driving him deeper into the young man's throat, feeling him swallow around him. That wet, velvety heat only made better by the strange sensation of being sucked off by someone with no front teeth.
Murdoc let his eyes slip shut for a second, just losing himself in the feeling when one of Stuart's hands disappeared from his hip, feeling the man shifting a little. He opened his eyes and looked down to see Stuart pressing the heel of his hand to the tent in his jeans, the sight in front of him causing him to rush dangerously close to the edge.
"Fuck... I'm pretty close... you sure you want me to..." He muttered, not sure if he could last long enough for the kid to make up his mind. Stuart just hummed in response, moving his other hand to replace Murdoc's around the base of his cock, hollowing his cheeks further and letting his eyes fall shut, groaning around him as he felt his mouth flood with precome.
"Stu..." Murdoc gasped, his hand tangling in 2D's hair.
The younger man felt the length in his mouth pulse as Murdoc came. He quickly pulled back, letting his mouth hang open, his hand making up for the loss of that wet heat. He felt the first few ropes of come land on his tongue, quickly lapping it up as he felt another hit his chin. He quickly took him back in his mouth for him to finish, his dark eyes trained on Murdoc's face.
The older man just stared in shock, his heart hammering in his chest as he reached down, wiping the mess from the kid's chin. When he had finished, he pulled away, pushing his thumb between the younger man's lips, feeling his large tongue wrap around the digit, licking it clean.
"You'll be the death of me..." He panted, feeling about ready to collapse when Stuart suddenly yanked his fly down, pulling out his angry looking cock, fisting it hard and fast, his head hanging as he let out rapid, desperate whines.
"2D..." Murdoc swallowed, feeling his spent cock twitch in response, but wanting to reciprocate.
"I'm sorry" he choked out, his free hand reaching up to grip Murdoc's hip again. "Oh god..." It had been nearly painful to ignore his own cock during that, and now he couldn't stop himself.
He felt Murdoc's body disappear from above him as the older man crouched down, pulling the bluenette's face into a searing kiss, ignoring the taste of himself on the other man's tongue, he reached down to cover his hand, gripping him a little tighter as he helped him finish.
Stuart came with a strangled cry, shuddering against his friend as he painted both their stomachs.
They sat like that, in silence for a few moments until the younger man calmed down, slumping against Murdoc's chest.
"That was nice..." He whispered, his voice hoarse from everything he'd been doing.
"Yeah, it was..." Murdoc hummed in response, finally nudging the kid a little. "But we've got to get cleaned up..."

Chapter Text

Later that day, everyone was lounging in the living room again, Murdoc and 2D trying not to draw attention to themselves. They had opted for separate showers in case anyone went looking for either of them.
Earlier had been exciting, but they were both unsure of how to advance with what they had both learned. The younger man was hoping to get Murdoc alone again so they could talk. In a perfect world, they could just live happily ever after screwing each other's brains out on a regular basis, but he knew the problems that came with that... what would the others say? Was Murdoc really interested in that?
He had his own doubts stirring in his stomach but ignored them as he watched the older man stretch out on the sofa, his long legs propped up on the table, with this bad arm hidden by another long sleeve top. The sweater had been put in the wash after 2D managed to mark the front of it. At least Murdoc hadn't been upset about that...

"I think we need to start on a few practice sessions tomorrow" The bassist mumbled as the movie they were watching went to an advert break.
"Do you think you can, with that arm?" Russell mumbled, looking over at him.
He was happy to see such a change in the man, something had happened between the two men that had seemed to change him for the better, Russell just wondered how long this would last.
"I need to get movement back into it" Murdoc shrugged "All of you need to practice though, not just me... faceache needs to clear his throat a little" He shot the young man a smirk, watching his eyebrows disappear under his mop of blue hair, accompanied by a squeak.
"Are you okay?" Noodle blinked beside him.
"Yeah" the kid nodded, wrapping an arm around the little girl and turning his attention back to the TV as the film resumed. Damn that man...

Murdoc chuckled silently to himself, scratching his stitches through his shirt a little. He didn't really feel up for having another 'family' movie night, but it was worth it to ruffle Stuart's feathers a little.
"Hey, dents" He muttered, catching the man's attention again. "Go and get me a beer"
The kid did so without hesitation, untangling himself from the nest he and noodle had made, but when Russel noticed him moving, he shot Murdoc a glare.
"Did you break your legs in the fall too?" He muttered. "Go get your own beer"
"Fine" Murdoc huffed, 2D already having left the room.
Once in the kitchen, he boxed the young man in against the fridge, earning another squeak.
"Don't sneak up on me like that!" 2D chuckled, smirking down at him.
"Shh... keep your voice down" Murdoc mumbled, eyes focused on the singer's lips.
"Why-" The young man was cut off as Murdoc crashed their lips together, pressing him against the fridge, hearing a few magnets clatter to the ground.
"No!" 2D hissed against his lips. "What if someone walks in?!"
"So?" Murdoc chuckled, pushing a hand up Stuart's shirt, feeling his soft skin underneath.
"Muds..." He gasped in protest, but wrapped an arm around the older man's shoulders, pulling him closer. "We can't..."
"Hmm... yeah we can" The old goth grinned, his fingers finding his nipples, pinching one softly.
"Fuck!" Stuart gasped, the two of them falling silent instantly.
"I swear if the pair of you are fighting over the last beer!" Russel called from the other room, bringing a deep flush to the younger man's cheeks.
"Shut it" Murdoc hissed, biting his neck. "If you're so worried about being caught..."
"Can't we go to your room?" Stuart whimpered, rocking his hips against the smaller man, feeling the hard line of his cock met with a similar hardness.
Murdoc hummed in approval but shook his head.
"Not yet..." He muttered, placing one last kiss on the other man's lips before pulling Stuart forward and opening the fridge, pulling out a beer and disappearing back into the living room.
So much for talking later...

Back in the living room, Murdoc was already back on the sofa, but this time had a blanket pulled around him, hiding the tent that 2D knew was there. He was luckily wearing baggier clothes, but opted for sitting on the floor, instead of joining Noodle back on the smaller sofa.
Everyone had sat in silence, watching the film, until things between the plucky young girl character and the cynical, hunky character found themselves trapped in a safe room, the two of them getting more than a little friendly.
"Alright, you. Time for bed" Russel said quickly, getting to his feet and lifting Noodle to her feet before quickly hurrying her off to her room.
The two men were left in silence as the scene unfolded on the screen. Murdoc was bored, he had never found any enjoyment watching people on a screen getting off, especially when it was as staged as this, but seeing the way 2D was already shifting uncomfortably was entertainment enough.
As the soft moans of the on-screen couple started growing in intensity, the younger man allowed himself to glance over at the bassist, their eyes meeting for a second. He wondered if he moved to the sofa if they could behave enough in case Russel came back, but he was also hoping they could disappear back to his room to continue what they were doing earlier.
His conflict was solved however when Murdoc lifted his blanket, inviting him to join him. Stuart quickly crawled on to the sofa beside him and pulled the cover over the pair of them, enjoying how warm the other man was.
"This time... you keep your voice down..." Murdoc warned him, his hand reaching over to cup Stuart through his pajama bottoms, feeling how hard he was already.
"Muds..." 2D gasped, his eyes falling shut. He didn't know what he should do, but he was enjoying the attention too much to worry about it right now.

Murdoc didn't mind that he couldn't use his other hand right now, just enjoying the sounds his younger band member made. He pushed the waistband of his pajamas down, wrapping a hand around Stuart's length and squeezed, earning a low groan from him. He felt a lot bigger than he had that morning, now he wasn't stroking him through his flies.
"You'd think you hadn't gotten any lately..." Murdoc smirked, admiring the pale expanse of the other man's neck as he stretched himself out on the sofa.
"To be fair" Stuart gasped, as Murdoc began to stroke him slowly. "You've interrupted me a few times... gets a little frustrating..."
"Should've just told me... I'm sure I would've given you a hand..." The older man smirked.
"Thought you would've put me through a wall..." 2D frowned a little, but that expression quickly fell as Murdoc swiped his thumb over the slit of his cock, collecting the moisture that had gathered there.
Murdoc ignored that for a moment, taking his hand away to push the blanket aside, curiosity finally getting the better of him. His eyebrows raised just a little as he took in the size of the younger man fully. He had figured that 2D was going to be big, he was tall enough... Luckily he wasn't thicker than the bassist, otherwise, he might have felt a little self-conscious.
"Something wrong?" 2D blinked, opening his eyes which he hadn't realized he'd closed. Murdoc took a moment to push the waistband of his own pajama pants down, allowing his hard length to arch up towards his belly.
"So you've never sucked anyone else off before... which I find fucking hard to believe..."
"I haven't" Stuart smirked, wrapping a hand around himself while Murdoc got himself comfortable.
"What have you done then?"

Chapter Text

"Made out with a few..." 2D shrugged, scooting a little closer.
"Bullshit" Murdoc smirked, wrapping his arm around Stuart's shoulder and pulling him into a kiss.
"It's true" The bluenette smirked against his lips. "Never got very far with blokes..."
"Ever done anything interesting to yourself?..." Murdoc groaned as 2D suddenly climbed onto his lap. "You're explaining this if we get caught..."
"They're not coming back..." Stuart assured him, leaning in to kiss along Murdoc's collarbone. "And I think you're angling for something... so just say it"
"Have you ever been fucked..." The satanist growled, his good hand coming up to grip 2D's shoulder. he could feel their cocks sliding against one another now and tried desperately not to buck his hips up just yet.
Stuart couldn't hide the pleasant shivers that ran up his spine at that.
"N-not really" he muttered, his long fingers now running through Murdoc's dark hair.
"What's not really?" The older man grinned, immediately imagining the different ways he could use that tight hole of his. But the most prominent image of all was having him bent over on his bed, ass in the air, begging to be filled.
"I've used my fingers a few times... but it wasn't that great..." 2D admitted, letting out a surprised yelp as he felt Murdoc's hand disappear from his shoulder and push into the back of his pajamas.
"What are you doing?" he whimpered, praying that he wasn't going to do anything dry.
"You weren't doing it right," The older man said plainly, digging his nails into Stuart's soft backside.
"Probably" 2D swallowed thickly, reaching down to wrap a hand around both their lengths, trying to distract him a little. He was nervous about doing anything with Murdoc... the man was a notorious sex god, but he was also incredibly violent when he wasn't on max strength painkillers... he wasn't sure how well he would maintain control in that situation. "What have you done?... with guys, I mean..."
"More than you could possibly imagine" Murdoc huffed, his eyes falling shut for a moment, mind wandering from what he was previously thinking about as he felt those long, talented fingers around his cock.
"Have you ever been fucked then?" The taller man asked, resting his head against Murdoc's.
"Never" The older man growled suddenly. "I don't bottom for anyone..." That wasn't entirely true, he had had a few rounds with some adventurous girls in the past, but never men, he refused to be in that position. Things always seemed more intimate with men, which was why he rarely hooked up with them, it always ended up too intense and emotional. The pair of them felt the uncomfortable shift in the conversation, but neither of them wanted to pull away, both already too caught up in what they were doing, but too nervous to push forward.

The two were so wrapped up in themselves that they didn't hear the living room door opening, but heard Russel clearing his throat from the back of the room.
The pair of them jolted as if they'd been electrocuted and scrambled to cover themselves. 2D's face had lit up red in an instant, and Murdoc's face had donned its usual scowl.
"I don't want to know, I don't want to talk about it. I just forgot my phone" The large man shook his head, quickly walking past the pair of them and grabbing what he came for before disappearing out into the hall again.
The two men stood in silence for a moment before turning to each other.
Murdoc was the first to break the silence.
"So much for not getting caught..." He muttered, pulling his pajama pants up and stalking off to his room, leaving Stuart feeling guilty.

Chapter Text

That night, Stuart sat up in his room smoking. He didn't know when the night had turned, but it was definitely before Russell walked in on them.
He thought over what had been said to him, despite the usual fog that hung behind his eyes when he had taken his painkillers for the night.
Was he pushing things too much with Murdoc? Was he taking advantage of his vulnerable position?... he couldn't shake the guilt in him...
The other thing that played on his mind and refused to let his headache subside was the thought of eventually giving the last shreds of his virginity to the older man. Never in a million years did he think Murdoc would be the one to take it...
He wasn't a shy delicate flower, but he was a sensitive soul, and things like that, he wanted to be treated carefully and sweetly. His first time with a woman was rushed and messy. In his older age, he had learned to appreciate moments like that. He cherished his first time with Paula, despite how much she had hurt him afterward... it had been special...
He wasn't sure if Murdoc could do special...

Down the hall and up the stairs in his own room, Murdoc stared at the opposite wall again, his bass pressed against his chest as he tried to ignore the sting in his stitches. he had caught them in the rush to get up and one of them had torn a little, leaving some blood on his sleeve.
He had taken something that Stuart had left in his room and tried to relax, considering what Stuart had said... He was technically a virgin... well, not entirely, of course, he'd caught him in the act with a few girls to know he wasn't a total virgin... he knew where to put it, the problem was that he didn't want to be on the other end of it...
And considering the way the younger man had reacted when his hands started to wander, he was more than a little nervous about trying it too...
He hated this... the effort of caring about people, there was none of this with the women he picked up at their gigs... And he really wished this was that simple... but he cared about Stuart... and so far, the man seemed to care about him... for once he had the beginnings of a real relationship...

Murdoc growled in frustration at his indecisiveness. He wanted this, and he wanted to be happy. He needed to think of a way to do this with Stuart in a way that was comfortable for the both of them... and he needed to start by making sure that Start wasn't upset about being caught.
He pulled his phone out of his pocket and typed out a quick text.

'What are you doing?'

In Stuart's room, he was just drifting off when his phone buzzed beside him. He pulled his to his face and frowned at the message.

'Just laying in bed. U?'

He typed out his quick reply and sat up a little, wondering if the older man was going to come to his room.
But Murdoc thought that this would be a good way to discuss this without making either of them too uncomfortable.

'Thinking about earlier'
'About having sex with you'

Stuart smirked at the blunt text, propping himself up against his headboard.
He grabbed his tobacco and papers and placed them on his lap, grabbing the small tin from his bedside drawer and rolling himself a joint.

'What have you been thinking about it?'

Murdoc sighed, thinking carefully before replying. He tried to relax and think about how he would go about introducing Stuart to it... He had said that he had tried with his own fingers, but it hadn't felt good... what could he do differently?

Stuart got a little worried when Murdoc didn't reply, so he decided to take things into his own hands. Keeping it a little playful, he typed out another message to prompt him.

'What do you want to do to me?'

Murdoc smirked a little at that, thinking of all the wonderful things he did want to do... but keeping it simple, he decided to just put.

'I would start with opening you up...'

Stuart hummed to himself, considering trying that out on himself again. Maybe he had expected too much before, maybe he had been too nervous... Although his brain helpfully added that Murdoc's fingers were thicker than his, and although shorter... he had seen the way he played bass, and those fingers were pretty talented.

'You'd have to go pretty slow... I think I'd be pretty tight'

Murdoc groaned a little at that, imagining that tight hole around his fingers. As he started picturing him around his cock he realized that maybe he would be a little much for the younger man to handle so quickly... He was only above average length, but he was pretty thick if he did say so himself... The idea of toys drifted into his mind.

'I have a few ways of stretching you... I'd try to be gentle'

Something in him felt odd for adding that last part... be it suddenly hit him that maybe Stuart was scared that he'd try and hurt him. He knew he wasn't the nicest to him in the past, and if he was to sit there and think about all the times the pair of them had come to blows, he would completely ruin his mood. But he would never hurt Stuart intentionally during sex... not unless he wanted to.
He had some dark tastes, but they weren't for everyone... And he wasn't about forcing people sexually.

Stuart felt the last little bits of tension leave him as he read that text, relaxing against his bed as he took another drag from his joint.

'I think you need to teach me... I wouldn't mind learning how to do it myself... I like the idea of making myself all ready for you...'

The bassist groaned, resisting the urge to get up and make his way to the singer's room. He couldn't keep doing this through text, so he hit call and let his phone fall to his chest as he palmed his half hard cock through his pajama pants.
Stuart answered almost immediately, with a small chuckle on the other end.
"This isn't what I meant... but I like it" He mumbled quietly.
"I want to see if you can follow instructions..." Murdoc muttered, getting himself comfortable and once again cursing himself that he couldn't use this other hand as he pushed down his pajama pants.
"I can..." 2D assured him, hearing the shuffle of fabric on the other end. "I can listen... just tell me what to do..."
"Take your pants off..." Murdoc instructed, wrapping and hand around his length and he felt it harden against his palm. "You're going to need something to get yourself nice and wet... And I don't mean spit..."
Stuart nodded to himself, pushing down his trousers and reaching over to his drawer, pulling out a very neglected bottle of lubricant. This was probably one of the things he had gotten wrong the last time he had tried, not bothering with proper lube.
"Now, I want you to slick up a few fingers... you might only use two, but it's better to be prepared now..." he explained, picturing the younger man spread out on his bed, a pleasant shiver running up his spine.
"Okay" Stuart swallowed when he did as he was told, placing the bottle aside and coating the fingers of his less dominant hand.
"Now... I want you to take a finger and press around your hole... nice and gentle... you want to make sure you're really relaxed... so maybe... start stroking yourself a little..."
Murdoc tried to think about what he would do if he were there. One of the downsides of this being over the phone is that he couldn't fully distract the boy.
"It feels weird" Stuart swallowed, massaging the tight ring of muscle a little and wondering how in the hell Murdoc would possibly fit...
"It's going to... and it will probably hurt. But It'll be fine" The older man sighed, stroking himself a little, he could tell Stuart was doing as he was told, and the image spurred him on even more. "When you feel yourself relax a little, I want you to push a finger in, it's gonna be weird... but go slow"
"Okay" Stuart sighed, pushing with a little pressure. He managed to push in at least halfway before he had to stop, trying to distract himself a little by stroking his cock, feeling it losing interest a little from the strange sensation.
"Good" Murdoc groaned, hearing the little gasps on the other end. "Just... keep at it..."
"Okay" Stuart whispered, pushing a little deeper. The sensation was totally odd to him and he was beginning to regret this whole thing when Murdoc spoke again.
"This may be a little difficult... but there should be a sort of bump, it's really sensitive, so go slow"
Stuart groaned as he pushed a little deeper. He wasn't sure what Murdoc was on about there being a really sensitive spot, and he was about to pull his finger out and give up when he brushed against something that sent almost a painful jolt through his cock.
"Ahh-fuck" Stuart gasped, screwing his eyes shut.
"That'll be it..." Murdoc muttered to himself, squeezing his cock a little tighter. "Don't press against it, that'll be too much... just try to stroke around it..."
Stuart did as he was told exactly, carefully tracing around that spot and feeling as his lower half began to twitch a little with the soft jolts of pleasure.
"Ohh god" Stuart sighed, his other hand now stroking in time with his finger.
"You should be able to push deeper now... and kind of stroke over it as you pull out..." Murdoc smiled, the sounds on the other end of the phone almost becoming sinful.
The bluenette tried pulling his finger out, brushing against the sensitive spot ever so slightly, feeling his hole squeeze momentarily before letting himself put in again with ease.
"When should I add another finger?" He gasped, not realizing that he was panting until he started to speak. He was shaking a little with the effort to not just stroke himself to completion. He could hear the sound of Murdoc stroking himself now, and it only served to encourage him more.
"If you think you're ready?" Murdoc blinked, really wishing he could see the young man now.
"I'll try" Stuart swallowed, pulling his finger out completely before adding a second and pushing in very slowly. It took a little adjustment, but like before, he gradually pushed deeper and deeper until he felt that spot again. The clench of his hole around his fingers this time was more intense, but it forced his fingers to press against it a little harder, pulling a low whine from his throat.
"Enjoying yourself?" Murdoc chuckled, stroking himself a little faster now.
"Yes," Stuart gasped, pushing a little deeper before he attempted to thrust his fingers. "A lot better than last time..."
"Good" Murdoc grinned. "Bet you look amazing spread out like that... I think you'd look a lot better on my dick"
Stuart chuckled breathlessly as he thrust his fingers into himself, his dominant hand stroking himself faster. Every time he ran his fingers over his prostate, he felt his length throb, desperately wanting to cum now. "You're a lot thicker than my two fingers..." He commented.
"That's true... so I might have to open you up next time" He grinned, rocking his hips up into his fist. "You're sounding pretty good... are you close?"
"Yeah" Stuart hummed, biting his lip a little. "Didn't think it would be this good... but I think your fingers would be a lot better... wish it was you in here..."
Murdoc was about to comment but something in him broke, he pulled his hand away and wiped it off on his sheets before pulling up his pants and grabbing his phone. He made his way out of his room as quietly as he could, hearing Stuart whimpering on the other end. He navigated the halls in the dark with ease, finally reaching the young man's room.
"Let me in" He finally muttered, knocking on the door gently.

Chapter Text

Stuart almost jumped out of his skin when he heard the knock on his door. He pulled his fingers out of himself and sat up quickly, pulling his phone to his ear.
"I-is that you?" the young man gasped, his length almost aching as he got to his feet. His hole feeling empty from the sudden loss of contact.
"Yeah" Murdoc smirked, "Let me in..."
2D got to his feet and rushed to the door, not bothering to cover himself up as he let the older man in, locking the door behind the both of them. He hung up the call and threw his phone aside, looking into the bassist's eyes.
"What did you come to do?" He swallowed nervously, resisting the urge to stroke himself.
"Just came to give you a hand... I won't do anything until you're ready..." he assured him, pulling him into a gentle kiss that was quite unlike him.
"Please" Stuart groaned, pulling him towards the bed. "How... how do you want to do this?"
"Lay down" Murdoc instructed, grabbing the bottle of lubricant from the bedside table.
The young man did as he was told, feeling a little vulnerable spread out on his bed.
"Fuck you look beautiful like this..." Murdoc swallowed, coating his fingers as he dropped to his knees. He wasn't going to be able to support his weight with his bad arm, so this was the best position. He spread the singer's legs and ran a slick finger along his pink hole before pushing a single digit inside.
The feeling was a lot different to doing it himself, Murdoc was able to find his prostate almost instantly, and knowing how sensitive it was, only stroked past it gently.
"You are so tight" Murdoc gasped, resting his head against one of the other man's thigh's as he thrust his finger a little. He could feel the muscles fluttering around him, but decided he'd try to add a second digit.
"ahh..." Stuart whimpered, feeling himself being stretched even more by the older man's thicker fingers. He wanted to grind himself down on his hand, but he was scared of being told off, or possibly hurting himself. So he trusted the shorter man and let the amazing sensations wash over him. "Please... Muds"
"Remember to use your words... if you want me to stop" Murdoc warned him before starting to thrust his fingers a little harder, catching that bundle of nerves every so often and feeling him clench around his fingers. His own length throbbed painfully at the thought of that tight heat enveloping him.
"C-can you go faster?" 2D whimpered, gripping the sheets beneath him.
Almost immediately Murdoc began to fuck him with his fingers, watching the younger man's length leaking profusely against his stomach.
"Touch yourself... you won't last long" He smiled, watching Stuart wrap a hand around himself as he rocked his hips up, the bassist trying to match his movements to the strokes.
"Ohhh fuck" the young man almost cried, biting his lip and almost drawing blood as he came, his entire body tensing as he felt hot streaks painting his stomach. Murdoc slowed his thrusts but didn't remove his fingers until the kid was finally spent, admiring how gorgeous he looked sprawled on his bed.
"So you enjoyed that?" Murdoc hummed, moving so that he could lay on the bed beside him, listening to his friend's breathing evening out again.
"Yes" the young man grinned, his eye falling shut for a moment before sitting up a little.
"What's wrong?" the bassist frowned, but his singer quickly shifted from the bed, now kneeling between his legs on the floor.
"You have a lot more self-control..." 2D swallowed, wrapping a hand around Murdoc's angry looking erection. The older man had been so caught up with how Stuart was doing, that he hadn't really been paying attention, but now he could feel that coiled pressure inside him, causing that amazing ache in his balls.
"Hm, well aren't you considerate" The satanist chuckled, letting out a loud groan as he felt those talented lips wrap around his length. He reached down with his good arm and threaded his fingers through Stuart's blue locks. He tugged a little, savoring the deep moans that earned from the other man. "So fucking hot... ahh... Don't be afraid to use your teeth a little"
His fingers gripped the young man's head tighter as he felt the faintest of scrapes against the head of his cock as 2D pulled away.
"Tell me more of what you like" he swallowed, licking his lips a little before taking the bassist's cock almost down to the base in one go, causing Murdoc to buck his hips in shock.
"Oh fuck" He whined, his head falling back against the bed. "That!" He whimpered "What you're doing now..."
Stuart gave a little groan in response, trying to coax him into talking more.
"I like being in control" He grunted, not really thrilled about talking while amazing things were happening to his lower half. "I like to watch people come undone... because of me"
Stuart listened intently as he bobbed his head, his other hand moving to roll the man's balls in his hand, feeling as they were already drawing up close to his body.
"I like... fuck, do that again with your tongue" He gasped, rocking his hips up again, making sure not to choke the poor boy. 2D could feel that he was trying to hold back, so he placed his hands on his friend's hips, taking him as deep as he could, feeling him hit the back of his throat and really test his gag reflex, but he managed to suppress it, hollowing his cheeks as he bobbed his head, groaning to send vibrations through Murdoc's length.
"Fuck... I'm close..." The older man warned, tugging a little at Stuart's hair. He couldn't help but picture the kid's face the last time they were in this position, wanting to see that beautiful face painted with his cum.
"Show me that pretty tongue of yours" He gasped, out, his hand moving to grip Stuart's jaw.
The younger man pulled away, holding his mouth open as Murdoc forced himself into a sitting position, his singer's hand coming up to stroke him to completion, all the while holding his tongue out to lap at the tip.
The thing that pushed him over the edge, however, was as 2D's large black eye met his in an intense gaze, feeling something inside him break, letting out a loud grunt as he came, thick ropes of cum landing on Stuart's tongue and chin. He quickly tried to lap it up, but only managed to get more on his face.
The sight was enough to earn a few last twitches from Murdoc's spent cock. He collapsed back on the bed with a content sigh.
The younger man grabbed a t-shirt from his floor and lazily wiped himself clean before joining him.
"That was fun..." He hummed, reaching out to find Murdoc's good hand, lacing their fingers together.
"Yeah" The bassist chuckled, resisting the initial urge to pull his hand away.
The two of them lay in silence for a while, just enjoying the afterglow of what they had done. Stuart thought to himself, considering how Murdoc had been throughout that...
"I think I want to do more next time..." He muttered, gazing up at his ceiling.

Chapter Text

After that night, and after he had thought over what 2D had said, he started to plan something that was truly unlike him. When he caught himself looking at the outfit he'd picked out, he even startled himself.
He had planned to take the singer out for the night, after being told how significant something like this was to him, he wanted to try and make an effort... to the best of his abilities at least.
He looked himself over once more, wondering just why there were a few butterflies in his stomach... although in his case, they were probably more like moths... Murdoc didn't take people out on dates... people didn't need wooing or seducing when he was involved... but Stuart was different... He tugged on the sweater a little, knowing that the kid would be happy to see him in it. As for the rest of him, he just wanted to be comfortable, he knew he would end up feeling a little on edge tonight, so he wore a decent pair of black jeans, paired with some simple boots... He already had the young man's attention, no need to try and attract anymore.

When he was finally ready, he wandered down to Stuart's room, knocking lightly.
The bluenette jumped a little, shuffling over to answer his door. He looked down at the bassist and smiled shyly, fidgeting with the handle.
"Are you ready?" he blinked, biting his lip a little.
"Ready as I'll ever be" He hummed, pushing his good hand into his pocket, drawing the young man's attention to what he was wearing.
"You're playing a dangerous game..." Stuart chuckled, reaching out to play with the soft knit.
"Just wondering how much self-control you have..." the bassist growled, leaning in to give him a brief kiss before heading downstairs to call a taxi.
It wasn't far to the club, and it was a Wednesday night, so it shouldn't have been too busy...
They stepped in from the cold and scanned the room, the dance floor was packed, and there didn't seem to be much room at the bar, but sitting together would only lead to feeling tense. The music that way playing was decent, so they decided to drift onto the dance floor together, not daring to make that much contact, save for their arms bumping into one another every now and then.
Other people in the crowd seemed to ebb and flow between the two of them, the young man always managing to slip between bodies to return to Murdoc's side.
"How is your arm?" he muttered as they leaned into to one another for a second.
"Fine... I've taken enough to not feel it until later" The satanist sighed back.
There seemed to be a surge of more people over the next few minutes, forcing the two to dance closer together, this time their sides and legs bumping.
"I rarely see you dance..." Stuart smiled. "You should do it more often..."
"You really want me to dance with you more?" Murdoc purred, suddenly leaning in just a little too close, his lips brushing the younger man's cheek.
2D swallowed thickly, his mouth suddenly stretching into a gapped grin.

Just as he was about to speak, a familiar beat played out over the speakers, almost pulling a chuckle from the two of them. Stuart ducked his head a little as his voice began to fill the club, the crowd around them swaying to Tomorrow Comes Today.
"Do you think that's their way of telling us we've been spotted?" He smirked, his big black eyes glancing at Murdoc's.
"Let's see if they've got anywhere a little quieter..." The older man hummed, lacing his fingers with his friend and pulling him through the dancers.
They came to a dark wooden door at the back that was unlocked, leading to a corridor that was an almost dizzying shade of purple. Paired with the black carpet and the bass thumping through the building, Stuart could feel a headache tugging behind his eyes.
They stumbled past a few doors before someone emerged, wearing a staff lanyard.
"Sorry to bother you, my dear" Murdoc hummed, cocking his head slightly. "I was just wondering if there was somewhere a little less... popular for us to sit..."
"My manager just sent me to find you two" the woman smirked, batting her lashes at him a little before leading them further down the hall to a private room, kitted out with TV's playing the same generic stock footage that was projected around the club, along with a mini bar and speakers playing the same music as the main area.
"If you need anything, do let us know" The employee smiled, closing the door behind her. Being as well known as them did have its' perks sometimes.

Once he knew they wouldn't be disturbed, he pulled the bluenette into a heated kiss, enjoying the sound of that heavenly voice surrounding him. His hand came up to tangle in that mess of hair and his teeth bit into his soft, bottom lip. His senses were completely taken over by the boy and he was happily drowning in him.
"Do you really like my voice that much?" 2D muttered against his lips, earning a drawn-out sigh.
"Yes," Murdoc admitted bitterly, yanking Stuart's head back a little to bite down on his pale neck.
"Fuck-ah... you ever... listen to me?" He swallowed, his hands holding Murdoc's head as he continued down to his collarbone, whether to hold him back or keep him close, he wasn't sure yet...
"When I'm getting off... all the time" The older man swallowed, sucking deep bruises into the singer's skin, not really caring who saw. He was famous for giving the kid bruises, not uncommonly ones around his throat.
The song finally ended, much to Stuart's relief, but Murdoc continued his assault on his neck, almost tearing the neck of his t-shirt to gain more access.
"I thought you were going to dance with me?" The younger man chuckled, wrapping his long arms around his friend's shoulders.
"I'll show you how I really dance with people... and you let me know if you want me to take you out again..." Murdoc grinned, his hands running down to grip those slender hips. Mainly using his good hand, he yanked the singer close and gasped as he felt the already hard outline of his cock through his jeans.
The next song that played went over both their heads but had a decent enough bass to find a rhythm as he began to grind against the young man.
"Don't know how we're walking out of here looking like this" 2D panted, leaning down to kiss and nip at Murdoc's neck and ear, enjoying the subtle little shivers.

Chapter Text

Murdoc paused for a second, realizing that he also had no idea how they were going to get out of there without being seen by at least a few people. He had to think fast...
He suddenly grabbed the collar of the younger man's shirt, spinning the pair of them and slamming him up against the door, hearing the loud bang echo throughout the hall.
"What are you doing!?" Stuart gasped, ignoring the way that sudden move had made his cock twitch in interest.
"You're gonna have to be louder than that" Murdoc chuckled, pulling him backwards, hoping to hit the sofa he'd seen in the middle of the room, but when his ankle hit the coffee table, the pair went flying, the bassist landing with a loud crash on the table, with the singer following after.
"What did you do that for?!" The bluenette shouted in a panic, completely baffled as to what his friend was doing. He'd completely lost it.
Suddenly there was a quiet knock at the door.

"Is everything okay in there?" the woman from before's voice called.
"Told you everyone in the club could bloody hear you!" Murdoc shouted, a grin still plastered accross his face. He reached up and ruffled his own hair before sliding out from under Stuart, making his way to the door.
He opened it just a crack and leaned out, muttering a frustrated and slurred apology before slamming the door again.
By this time, the singer was on his feet, smoothing down his shirt.
"Muds, what's gotten into you" He huffed, looking a little hurt.
"Just play along... yeah?" the older man chuckled under his breath, pulling him into a rather sweet kiss. "Bite me"
"What?" 2D gasped against his lips.
"Bite me... hard"
The young man was a little hesitant, but sank his teeth into Murdoc's lower lip, earning an appreciative growl.
"Harder" he groaned, pushing his hands through the kid's hair.
2D almost braced himself before biting down a little harder, suddenly tasting a familiar copper tinge against his tongue.
"Fuck, I'm sorry!" he choked, pulling back to see the smear of blood against his bassist's lip.
"Oh, I'll make you sorry" Murdoc smirked, advancing on the young man who was moving towards the door again.
Stuart's back hit the wooden surface, quickly followed by Murdoc's hands slamming against the door.
"What the fuck is going on!?" the singer hissed.
"I'm getting us out of here" Murdoc groaned, rolling his eyes a little before he wrapped his hands around Stuart's hips and slammed them back against the door.
"Ah fuck!" Stuart whined, biting his own lip as he looked down into those mismatched eyes. He still didn't understand, but he thought it would be best to trust the older man.
"Mr. Niccals, are you sure everything is okay?" That female voice called again, causing them both to jump. Murdoc grinned, placing one last kiss on Stuart's lips before grabbing him by the scruff of the neck and opening the door.
"Can't fucking take you anywhere, can I?!" He shouted, pulling him down the hall, secretly following the fire exit signs to the back door, leaving the club employee looking shocked.

They still passed a few other customers milling around, passing the queue for the toilets and the musicians from earlier that night around the back door, but none of them stopped to talk to them when the bassist looked like he was doing to tear the singer a new one.
Once outside and far enough from staring eyes, Murdoc scanned the street for a taxi to hail, letting go of Stuart's collar and looking him over.
"you alright?" he asked.
"yeah..." Stuart nodded, fiddling with his jacket a little.
"Got us out of there..." the older man shrugged, feeling a little bad about manhandling the kid, but he had a point.
"Is that what that was?!" Stuart blinked, turning to him. "I thought you were losing it! I thought I was losing it!"
"What did you think I mean by 'I'm getting us out of here'?!" Murdoc snapped, wiping the blood from his lips.
"I don't know!... why did you make me bite you?" 2D frowned, watching as the cut quickly disappeared under a new bead of blood.
"Looked convincing" Murdoc shrugged with a smirk. "Kind of hot though..."
Stuart stared for a moment before grinning too.
"Yeah... that kinda was..." He mumbled, enjoying the ache from being slammed up against that door.
Finally, a black cab turned the corner, Murdoc quickly hailing it and pulling the door open for his friend as it pulled up to the pavement.
"Did you mean what you said earlier then?" The singer muttered, keeping his conversation vague around the driver.
"About what?" Murdoc asked, looking over at the young man.
"About my voice..." Stuart smirked, reaching up to feel the bruises forming on his neck.
"I told you... all the time" Murdoc flushed a little, a little embarrassed to admit it.
"Any particular song?" the bluenette pressed.
Murdoc thought hard about that, he knew exactly what song was his go-to... but he really just enjoyed anything with the kid's voice in it... anything with just his vocals... He met Stuart's eyes for a moment before sighing.
"Broken..."
2D sat in silence for a while, thinking about Murdoc listening to his voice like that... that he really got off to him all the time, supposedly... Had this really been going on for that long? He knew he had feelings for the man since the beginning, always hiding them behind contempt for his disgusting behavior and awful temper... but there were times where he had been scared to admit it, times where there was no reason to dislike the man. If he were to tell his younger self what they got up to now, he wouldn't believe it.

The cab finally pulled up outside the house and Murdoc paid, wandering off inside, but waiting for Stuart at the stairs.
"You sure you want to do this?" He muttered, playing with the hem of the taller man's shirt
"That's what this whole night's been for, ain't it?" 2D smiled.
"Doesn't have to be for this... we can leave it at this if you're nervous..." Murdoc explained. He could be an asshole, he knew that. But if there was one thing he stood by, that was not forcing people into sex... He was lucky enough that most women didn't turn him down, if they did, he just took care of things himself... He was just really hoping that Stuart didn't say no.
"Of course I'm nervous" the blue-haired man huffed with a smirk. "But I want to"
"well then" Murdoc swallowed, starting to ascend the stairs, taking Stuart's hand and leading him up to his room.

Chapter Text

Russel and Noddle were nowhere to be seen as they wandered through the hall to Murdoc's room; They were both thankful for that.
Stuart went to sit on the older man's bed as Murdoc locked the door. He noted that he had tidied a little, clothes had been moved to the other side of the room, and the bedside table had been cleared of the mountains of cigarette packets and burnt out butts. The sheets had even been changed... He looked up at the older man to see him kicking off his boots and shrugging out of his jacket.
2D did the same, hanging it over the end of the bed, those nerves in his stomach starting to knot a little tighter.
As if he could read his thoughts, the bassist crossed the room and sat beside him, pulling him into another sweet kiss.
"Tell me to stop... at any point, and I will" he assured him as he reached up to run his fingers through those blue locks again.
Stuart wanted a little of the attention off of him for a moment, so decided to question him a little further now that he didn't have to reword everything.
"What do you picture?... when you get off to my voice?"
"God, you're never going to let that go" Murdoc groaned, trying not to smile. "Proper little stroke for your ego, huh..."
"Do you picture me singing to you?... watching you do that?" the singer pressed.
"I imagine you trying to hit those lovely notes split open on my cock" Murdoc growled, tugging his hair a little, earning a soft gasp.
"Really?" he blinked, earning a small nod from the older man.
"You're too bloody composed when you're performing..." He chuckled.
"What else do you imagine doing to me?" 2D swallowed, running a hand down Murdoc's sweater to his jeans, playing with the zip. He could feel the man's length straining against the fabric, twitching a little from the gentle contact.
"I like making you lose control... being in control of you..." Murdoc admitted. "When you beg me..."
"Well then... please touch me" Stuart swallowed, looking into his eyes. "I want to feel you stretching me open again..." He didn't know how he had said that without his voice wavering, but hearing how vulnerable Murdoc was being, sharing with him like this, gave him a real confidence boost.

Murdoc wasted no time in pushing 2D onto his back, pulling his legs apart to settle himself between them as he leaned in, still biting and kissing his neck.
Stuart groaned in approval as he felt their clothed erections grinding together.
"Let me hear that lovely voice..." Murdoc groaned, reaching down to undo the kid's jeans, sliding them down his long legs, bringing his underwear with them. He felt a slight twinge in his arm but ignored it for now.
"Muds..." Stuart whined, reaching down to squeeze his aching length as it was released from his tight trousers.
"ah ah..." The older man smirked, batting his hand away. "You're not touching just yet..." Truth is, if the younger man started to touch himself now, he wouldn't be able to focus on doing this properly. He threw his jeans to one side before working on his own, pushing them down along with his boxers, leaving them both naked from the waist down.
"Take this off" the bassist muttered, tugging Stuart's top a little before reaching over to retrieve the bottle of lube in his bedside drawer.
He went to flick the cap open when a sharper twinge of pain ran through his wrist, causing him to hiss.
"What's wrong?" 2D blinked, throwing his shirt to one side.
"Nothin... just my arm" Murdoc swallowed, uncapping the bottle with this other hand.
"Are the painkillers wearing off?" the younger man frowned.
"Just a little, but it'll be okay" the bassist shrugged, pushing the singer's legs apart a little further. "You ready?"
"Yeah" Stuart nodded, already lacing the sheets between his fingers as he tried to calm his nerves.
Murdoc reached down, circling that tight ring of muscle with a finger, feeling it twitch a little.
"Relax a little" He muttered as he pushed in, just a little at first, allowing Stuart to stop squirming from the initial touch. As he stilled, he pushed further, enjoying the amazing feeling of his tight walls squeezing already.
"You can touch yourself now" The older man instructed, starting to pump his finger just a little, feeling for that bundle of nerves that would take his mind off everything.
"You gonna use more than two fingers this time?" Stuart gasped, letting his eyes fall shut as he wrapped a hand around his length.
"What makes you say that?" Murdoc smirked a little, pressing deeper.
"You're a lot fucking bigger than two fingers..." The singer chuckled breathlessly, adjusting his hips just a little as he felt Murdoc skim past his prostate.
"I'll keep going until you think you're ready" The bassist muttered before pulling out a little to add a second finger, feeling the resistance for a minute or two. He reached out with his bad arm, stroking the soft skin of Stuart's thighs, trying to get him to relax further. Finally, he was able to push both fingers into his knuckles, pulling out again, he felt that small cluster of nerves, gently brushing over it a few times.
2D seized a little, letting out a drawn-out whine, his hips almost immediately grinding down against those fingers.
"Ohh fuck... there" He pleaded, stroking his cock lazily, just enjoying what his friend was doing to him.
"You sure?" Murdoc purred, pressing a little harder, enjoying watching Stuart's eyes screw shut.
"Muds, I'm gonna cum you keep doing that!" He whimpered.
"Might make you relax a little" the older man grinned, but continued to thrust his fingers into him, now able to move with ease. He pulled out to add a third, admiring how pink his hole already looked stretched over his fingers.
"Three now... you're taking them so well" Murdoc groaned. He went to lean on the kid but gasped in pain as his arm nearly collapsed under his weight, causing 2D to almost sit up.
"What happened?" he frowned.
"Nothing" Murdoc blinked, his eyes stinging for a second as he sat up, resting his bad arm on Stuart's leg again.
"It's not nothing... can we swap places?" he asked, causing Murdoc to freeze for a moment.
"What do you mean?" he asked.
"I mean, you lay down, I'll get on top of you" the singer offered.

There was an awkward pause as Murdoc pulled his fingers away, moving to allow 2D up and for him to lay on his back. the singer straddled his hips and smiled down at him. he placed his hands on the older man's still clothed chest, enjoying the softness of the fabric. He lowered his hips just a little to grind against Murdoc's cock before lifting them again.
"Don't tease like that, unless you're ready" Murdoc grinned, his good hand moving back to his slick entrance.
"Do you think I'm ready?" 2D asked, sinking back onto those fingers, enjoying this new angle.
"Not yet" Murdoc shook his head, adding a third finger again and feeling those walls clench around him almost painfully, he was still so tight, his own cock aching to be buried in that wet heat.
However, as he skimmed the kid's prostate again, 2D whined.
"Please... Murdoc..." he muttered. "I think I'm ready..."
"Are you sure?" the bassist asked, pulling his fingers out a little.
"Yeah" the younger man nodded "I don't want to cum on just your fingers..." but the older man wasn't sure. He pulled his fingers out and reached over to grab the lube again, slicking his own length.
"It's probably going to hurt..." Murdoc explained, guiding himself to the singer's hole, pushing in only slightly. He bit back a moan, feeling those muscles fluttering around the head of his cock.
"Oh fuck..." 2D whimpered, this was a lot differed from fingers...
"You okay?" Murdoc swallowed, guiding his hips down slowly. And 2D was okay until he reached a point where the base of Murdoc's cock flared out, being a decent amount thicker than the head.
the bassist felt him stiffen around him as he stopped moving.
"Fuck, you're big..." the bluenette swallowed, not wanting to say that it was hurting.
"Ease up a little" Murdoc explained, unable to really lift him with his arm now hurting again. He felt Stuart lift slightly before lowering himself again. "That's it... up and down a few times... y-you just need to get used-ah... get used to it" He tried hard to keep his voice steady, but the feeling of those tight muscles twitching and clenching around him was making his cock throb painfully, he was resisting the urge to just thrust his hips up. "Touch yourself..."
2D reached down to stroke himself in time with the little bobs he was doing, taking in more of Murdoc each time before stopping just before the base, shaking his head again.
"I can't" He choked, out, his black eyes stinging now as he started to feel embarrassed.
"It's okay" Murdoc muttered, his good hand wrapping around Stuart's length, starting to stroke him a little fast.
"n-no!" Stuart whined. "Murdoc... I'm really close" Despite the pain, he couldn't deny how turned on he was, how overstimulated his felt already. He desperately wanted to feel Murdoc pounding into him, but he didn't know how he would possibly stretch anymore.
"Trust me... it'll help" Murdoc assured him, stroking him faster now, his hand still slick with lube as he squeezed and twisted his wrist, feeling the singer clenching and twitching around him harder now, making it nearly impossible to focus.
"So close... Muds-Murdoc!" The younger man was almost sobbing now, his hips rocking again, but unable to go any lower.
Murdoc was about to say something encouraging when suddenly the singer cried out, the walls around the bassist's cock squeezing like a vice as he came, painting his stomach in long ropes of white. There was a short breath and then Stuart sank down on him completely, his body almost collapsing on his bandmate.
"Oh fuck... that was amazing" 2D panted, unable to open his eyes just yet. His circled his hips a little before realizing that he'd taken him in completely. He used his hands on Murdoc's chest to sit up once more, feeling his oversensitive length twitch as he started to rock his hips again.
"You feel so fucking good..." he groaned, quickly pushing his bangs out of his face, admiring how blown out and soft Murdoc's eyes were as he stared at him.
"could say the same about you..." The bassist grinned, feeling close to his own orgasm. But he tried to stave it off, hoping he would be able to fuck the younger man properly, now that he had relaxed.
"Want to feel you properly now" Stuart hummed, lifting his hips a little before dropping down again, relishing in the feeling of being so full and so stretched.
"Oh god, yes" Murdoc whined, lifting his hips a little, to almost give them some distance before he started rocking his hips up, causing Stuart's head to fall back.
"Ohh... Muds" He moaned, his nails digging into his chest through the sweater. "Fuck... oh fuck"
Murdoc couldn't speak, was could only pant in response as he felt his balls drawing up almost painfully, his good hand shot out to grip Stuart's hip in a tight grip, his nails drawing blood as he buried himself in the younger man, coming with a grunt, filling the singer.
They stayed like that for a long while, as Murdoc calmed. He opened his eyes and gazed up at the beautiful man, enjoying the deep bruises that had formed on his neck.
"That really was amazing," 2D said again, lifting his hips a little and groaning at the feeling of cum dripping out of him.
"I'll get something to clean us up" Murdoc swallowed, rolling the young man onto his side before disappearing from the bed. He returned with a towel and cleaned the pair of them up, pulling the sweater off of him and laying down beside his friend.
"How are you feeling?" he asked.
"Sore" 2D smirked. "Have you got any cigarettes?"
"Yeah" Murdoc huffed with a chuckle, reaching over to the bedside cabinet again, pulling out a pack and a lighter. They both lit up a cigarette and smiled at each other in the dark, just enjoying the ache in both their bodies.