Coran has a headache. Which isn’t surprising, really, given how he has spent the last few days with a worm attached to his brain. But he doesn’t tell anyone about this, given how he feels like such an idiot for everything that has happened. And, after everything he has put the Paladins through lately, would they even want to sympathise with his headache?
Why did he do it? Why did he trust a quiznaking Unilu salesman like that? Why did he risk everyone’s lives just to give Voltron more publicity? How could he have done this to them all?
He just wanted to help. Coran knows how he had struggled with planning their events before, and he just wanted to make sure he had good ideas. Because if he had good ideas, then the Paladins would be happy with him and the coalition would have more members and everything would be good.
But no… instead, he made everything worse. He knows the Paladins are trying to get something good out of the situation, pointing out how they actually have lots more allies after all the performances they have done, but Coran knows it isn’t enough. And it wasn’t worth it. Risking the Paladins lives over a stupid show of arms could never be worth it.
And he risked his own life too. He knows he is the least essential member of their team, but things would surely suffer if he wasn’t there. And he knows that the worm could have easily led to brain damage or worse. He could have died and left their team vulnerable all because he wanted more ideas.
So he ignores his headache and slouches off to bed. Hunk says goodnight, but Coran wonders if he is being genuine. Do they all resent him now? He wouldn’t blame them if that were the case.
Coran curls up in bed without taking his shoes off, putting his pillow over his head. His head is pounding, but he bites his lip to stop himself groaning from the pain. They way he sees it, he deserves the headache. After the ridiculous amount of thinking and planning and acting he did in the time the worm was attached to his brain, it’s no wonder his head hurts the way it does.
And his personality changed so much during those few days. His voice went strange and he seemed to be running on endless energy, almost like a person on a stimulant drug. But he was also cracking, leaving himself mentally unstable and almost impossible to work with. If nothing else, the Paladins have a right to resent him for the way he snapped at them all.
Coran can’t remember a time he felt as much self loathing as he does right now. To be honest, his headache is making it difficult to think. All he really knows is he feels like a quiznaking idiot and he nearly got the Paladins killed and he wishes he could go back and change the past and not take the pill.
But he can’t turn back time. He’s stuck with what happened. And when bad things happen, you have to face the consequences.
He eventually falls asleep with his pillow on his face and pain throbbing deep inside this head.