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Of Enigmas and Games

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My name is Darcy Lewis, and I have a secret that no one knows. Well actually I have several secrets. My main secret though is universally shared with several others. You see, one day, many years ago the four of us sat at our computers to play a game. Oh, but not just any game, no. We sat down to play a game called SBURB. Stupid, I know, but we were dumb kids who didn't know any better at the time.

Luckily two miraculous things happened, we had both a Time player AND a Space Player, and our session collided with the giant clusterfuck masquerading as the Alpha, Beta and Trolls mixed session, causing our ultimalely doomed session to be saved and allowing us to create our own universe, officially winning the Game. Of course, since we helped save the old universe the others decided that our new universe was viable and helped us create it, ultimately tricking the Game and "winning" officially.

When we started to figure out what we wanted in our universe, several things immeadiatly became clear, sylladexes and strife specibi had to be done away with, for everyone except us, the protectors of the precious new universe. Well okay, the new Alternia will still have strife specibi, they kind of need it with all those horrorterrors running amok. With massive effort from ALL the Space and Time players we completely abolish the Game from our new universe. Though since we created the new universe we did get to keep our godtiers.

After intense debate we decide to split up, each of us choosing a time and place to settle, posting it on our memo board to make sure everyone else knows so that no time paradox shenanigans happen accidentally, they of course still will happen on purpose, but at least we are now prepared for it. I myself choose to settle in the year 1999, in Amarillo Texas, of fucking course as soon as we enter our new universe the Game gifts us with one final FUCK YOU by de-aging us to 13 years old, aka the age most of us started playing.

Unlike the others, I had no guardian, and as such I was quickly scooped up by foster care and shuttled off to various foster families, each with new and differing rules. Since I had my sylladex I always had my weird iPod/computer/hologram projecting thing, of course I also had my iGlasses, which were my glasses combined with my iPod monstrosity, which I used to update the others of my status, regardless of time, due to shenanigans. Once I was settled in I researched our new universe, you see even though we created it, we didn't control everything that happens in its creation, we just gave it a series of demands I guess.

The first thing I discovered was that Superheroes apparently existed on this new Earth, specifically Captain America, even more specifically the Marvel Cinematic Universe Captain America. Over the course of each of us(from my session) settling in, various things became apparent for each of us, I found superheroes were real, the Prince revealed that the mafia was still around and could use magical fucking rainbow flames, the Seer revealed a world of actual magic, like actual spell magic with a school and everything, and our friendleader the Page revealed that supernatural creatures like face-shifting vampires were real. To me when all that stuff was revealed it made me think that I was stuck in a particularly bad fanfiction.

But anyway, after five years of utter bullshit and fuckery I turned 18 and decided to go to college. I chose to major in political science, just to see how much better we could have played the Game. As for universities? I chose at random, applying to places and when they were accepted I added them onto my wall until it was completely covered. I threw darts at the wall and the most landed on choice was Culver University. I quickly made arrangements to live on campus, informing my friends via memos, in case they needed me.

I spread my college year out, ending up as a 20 year old senior missing 6 college credits. Honestly that happened completely on accident, you see a pervy professor thought that he could bribe me with straight A's in his class in exchange for sex. I of course took exception to his disgusting depraved idea and tased him(because we all swore we would learn a non-lethal weapon to deal with idiots who didn't quite deserve to die, but needed a reminder to stop being so DAMN dumb.)

But anyway yeah I'm missing crucial credits I needed to graduate, so I started looking for a solution. Luckily I found an internship that accepted me, had all the credits I needed, and peaked my interest. It was for a Jane Foster, it seems she needed someone to help her with her project in New Mexico. I asked around about her and the only feedback I got was that she was "a star crazy idiot with foolish ideas." But I didn't care, crazy people have more fun, so I flew(in a plane) to New Mexico, posting on my memo what was happening so that the others wouldn't freak out when they couldn't find me at college.

Months passed as I went from antisocial, barely there intern, to social butterfly, internet obsessed Jane-wrangler. Everything shifted when Jane called in her mentor, Erik Selvig, in. I had two scientists to lool after, so I rolled up my mental sleeves and got to work making sure my scientists ate and slept in between breakthroughs and various anomalies.

The others were highly amused at my current occupation. Hal and Eli gave me all kinds of shit about it, saying that Jane and I were soul sisters. I told them to fuck off and go reprogram a robot and tell the crows I said hey, respectively. My best friend was super nice and sympathized with what I was going through.