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shake it, shake it, shakespeare

Chapter Text

dad added angel and 7 others to the chat

dad has named the chat "theatre gays"

boo: may i ask what is this

memehao: i mean it's pretty obvious to me

memegyu: is it a cult

seokmeme: are we going to be sacrificed

NAEGAHOSH: i would like to state that i am very old and not a virgin so my blood is useless

woozi: that's it. the final straw. i am quitting the group

memehao: please take me with you

dad: gUYS CMON no need 2 b like dis

boo: who are you

memegyu: theres only one person who types like "dis"

angel: seungcheol what is this

dad: itsa group chat!!!!

woozi: what for

NAEGAHOSH: thought u were quitting

woozi: not now soonyoung

dad: ok so

dad: auditions r tmr rite??

woozi: for fuck's sake type properly i can't understand a single word

dad: ur no fun jihoonie :((

dad: what i was saying was

dad: auditions r tomorrow and we will have fresh meat soon which means. the group will grow and we need a groupchat dats it

boo: you shouldve,,,, ukno,,,, TOLD US

seokmeme: i legit thought it was a scam groupchat or some shit

memegyu: wait soonyoung so you're not a virgin??

NAEGAHOSH: whoops would u look at the time its time to bLAST


gemini: so what is this

angel: read the chat junhui

gemini: oh ok nice fresh meat

gemini: maybe some real dancers will get in

memehao: you know what jun

memehao: no dinner for you tonight :-)



memehao: (◕‿◕✿)

Chapter Text

Auditions are quite fun, specially when you're a diverse theatre group that doesn't stick just to epic/dramatic plays. Seventeen likes to call themselves "performers"; that's pretty much what they do, perform. Either it's a Shakespeare play, a Broadway-esque musical or a random mashup of songs choreographed into something solid. So, when their general theatre company (Pledis) opened the auditions, the Seventeen boys were excited. There were lots of groups under the company's name, so it was better for them to hold the auditions separatedly.

The nine boys had the company's medium-sized auditorium to themselves (one of the senior groups was rehearsing in the bigger one) and started calling the names as soon as everyone settled.

"Chwe Hansol."

A brunette wearing a Thrasher hoodie entered the stage hesitantly. "Hello, everyone." he greeted as he bowed.

"Hi!" Seungcheol smiled, trying to transmit friendliness. "So, what do you have?"

"Hm, I made a... mixtape?" he pulled a pendrive from his hoodie's pocket. "Actually, I need to clarify some things. I'm not an actor at all, but I heard you welcomed performers from all areas so I signed up; I'm a rapper. And I also know a thing or two about sound engineering and stage lighting, but I guess I can't show that on an audition. Sorry, I don't usually talk this much, I'm very nervous if you can't tell."

"No need to be, man." Soonyoung assured. "I'm not an actor either, more of a dancer, actually, but I'm here nonetheless. If you perform — any kind of performance — and work hard there's no reason not to be here auditioning."

Hansol thanked him for the encouragement, and plugged the USB driver on the stereo by the side of the stage. He pressed play and a nice beat started, echoing through the whole auditorium. They recognized it as PVRIS' "Mirrors". Jihoon raised an eyebrow at that and discretly mouthed "how is he gonna rap to this?" to the others.

But Hansol did. His flow was good, and in perfect sync with the song. He improvised during the chorus parts, which was seen with good eyes by the boys evaluating his performance. The lyrics were really nice as well.

"Did you write the lyrics?" Jihoon asked him.

"Yeah, I did."

"They're good. You were good." the short boy gave him an approving nod.

"Thanks for choosing us, we'll let you know if you made it."

Hansol bowed again and left with a small wave, which was returned by all the group members.

"That was actually pretty cool." Seokmin commented.

"He knows how to manage some stuff backstage, too." Mingyu added.

"Do we need another rapper, though?" Seungkwan questioned. "Don't get me wrong, I'm not hating, the guy is cool. I'm just laying the issues on the table, weighting the pros and cons and all that."

"We'll talk about everything later." Soonyoung interrupted. "Who is next?"


After a few failed skits and over-the-top musical numbers from the contestants, the boys were a little tired.

"If the next one is a musical kid, I'm going home."

"Jeonghan, you are a musical kid."

"Yeah, and I know my kind. Annoying, diva-like and stubborn. I think the only exception to this rule is Seokmin."

"Aw, thanks."

"I'm calling the next one." Jihoon announced. "Hong Jisoo."

A boy with peachy-pink hair and sparkly eyes carrying an acoustic guitar entered the stage with a soft smile. He bowed and waved.

"Hello, I'm Jisoo, or Joshua, and I'll be playing a piece on the guitar and then merging it with a small monologue if that's okay?? It's not a long number." he started, politely.

"It's okay, man, just do your thing."

He sat at the edge of the proscenium and started plucking the strings. The boys looked at Jeonghan as if asking him "weren't you going to leave if there was another musical kid?" but said boy was focused on Jisoo.

He started singing — it was an Adele song, "Turning Tables". It was sad and beautiful at the same time. His voice was like honey, and the acoustic arrangement was very well-done. When the song finished, he put the instrument aside, bitter semblant never leaving his face, got up from the floor and started reciting the lines to Gloumov's monologue in "The Diary Of a Scoundrel".

"Can't you see in my eyes that I'd rather die than cause you a minute's pain?"

When he finished the number, everyone was, for the lack of a better word, a bit shook (Seungkwan and Mingyu were tearing up a little).

"Wow." someone whispered.

Jisoo was standing in the middle of the stage, guitar resting on top of his feet while his hands held the instrument's arm. He had a curious look on his face, doe eyes wide and eyebrows raised.

"That was really good." Seungcheol commented. "Great job."

The boy on the stage bowed. "Thank you so much, and thank you all for having me."

"Thank you for choosing us. We'll let you know if you got in, stay tuned."

"I will." Jisoo smiled and bowed one more time. "Bye."

Once he was out, the boys started giving their two-cents about the performance.

"Dude." Minghao started. "That was awesome. His voice is so pretty."

"And the monologue? One word: killer."

"I'm actually a little scared." Soonyoung said. "I mean, how can he look all bubbly and soft and sing with a cotton-candy voice and then execute such a sad number? It's weird, man."

"It's called acting, Soonyoung, you should try it some time." Junhui teased.

"Shut up, child actor."

"Okay, children, settle down, settle down." Seungkwan used his best mom voice. "Someone please call the next name."

"Sure thing." Seungcheol nodded. "Hm. No more on letter H, none on letter I, let's move on to J. Jeon Wonwoo!"

A boy with jet-black hair wearing a leather jacket walked in, stood on the proscenium and bowed. "Hi, I'm Wonwoo, I'm a writer."

"Hello!" Soonyoung greeted back. "So, what did you prepare?"

"Are you guys familiar with slam poetry?" he asked. The audience all nodded, affirmatively, so he continued. "Cool. So, this is Shakespeare, slam poetry style, with a wicked twist." he paused, then winced, scrunching his nose. "Sorry, bad choice of words. It's not Glinda-and-Elphaba-Wicked; it's dictionary-wicked, as in, the actual meaning of the word. Sorry, I should have planned my introduction better. I swear I'm not making this up as I go, shit, I'm rambling, sorry."

"It's ok, we've all been there." Soonyoung offered a smile. "Although, to be honest, I would like to see what a Shakespeare-Wicked crossover would be like."

Wonwoo smiled back. "Thanks for understanding. And same." he took a deep breath and murmured "Ok. Let's do this."

"Whenever you're ready." Seungcheol said.

The boy on the stage closed his eyes and started reciting some lines from "Richard III". He spoke with passion, his words were clear and his voice was insteresting to listen to, deep and soothing. He started moving on the stage, eyes still closed. When he opened them, they were filled with fire, and the words he was saying turned unfamiliar; they were not a part of the original play, but were beautiful nonetheless. It was intriguing: it sounded like poetry, but none of the boys recognized it. It related to what was being recited before, but it was different. Unique. He closed his eyes again and went back to reciting.

The "opening-eyes-and-sneaking-in-verses-that-are-not-part-of-Richard-III" thing happened a few more times, and everytime Wonwoo opened his eyes they never failed to radiate some sort of emotion. The number ended with a single unfamiliar verse:

"And I apologize for all I did wrong, for I didn't know I was doing it."

Instead of closing his eyes again, he placed his right hand over them.

None of the Seventeen boys quite grasped the meaning behind it, but were speechless anyway. Someone, probably Junhui, whispered "so cool".

"That was really good, dude." Seungcheol complimented.

"Thank you."

"See? There was no need to be nervous." Soonyoung said. "You did a great job."

"I'm curious." Jihoon raised his hand slightly. "Those verses, the ones you recited whenever you opened your eyes. Where are they from?"

"Hm, they... They're mine. I wrote them." the black-haired boy fidgeted with his jacket sleeves sheepishly. "I pulled an all-nighter reading Richard III and my mind was suddenly filled with words, new verses, and I had to write them down. Not all of them are 100% related to the play, though, specially the last one — I'm not a Richard apologist at all, yikes."

"So that was your wicked twist?"

"Y-yeah." his voice wavered, he was nervous again.

"I think it was wicked enough." Soonyoung shot him a double thumbs-up. "Thank you for choosing us, we'll let you know if you made it."

"Thank you for having me, and for the compliments, I really appreciate it." Wonwoo bowed and left the stage.

"Tell me again why we didn't accept him on the spot." Seungkwan poked Jihoon's shoulder. The latter rolled his eyes and refused to respond.

"Lots of reasons, Kwannie." Seungcheol explained. "One: we need to get through all of the people on the list, it's the rules. Two: we need to have a team meeting to discuss every number. I could go on."

"But you have to admit that we've never seen anything like that before." Junhui said.

"Yeah, can't deny that. He said he was a writer, right? Figures."

"But he did more than that, though." Seokmin pondered. "The whole thing with the opening-and-closing his eyes? Plus, the moves on stage, with his eyes closed? That was intense, man."

"Sure was. But, let's not have biased opinions, right? I'm gonna call the next one, you guys chill."


It's not that they were bored. The next contestants just pretty much did the same cliche-monologue-and-or-bad-song number. There was one guy who literally sang Troy Bolton's "Scream". Seungkwan cried after he left.

"Please tell me it's the last one." Minghao sighed, draped over two chairs, with one foot propped up on Mingyu's shoulder.

"Sorry, bro, there are like 7 more after this one. You'll have to put up with this a little more."

"I don't wanna put up with this, I just want my bed. And homemade cookies." he looked at Mingyu expectantly after the last sentence.

"Nope, I'm not cooking anything tonight. I'm as tired as you are, fucknut."

Minghao hit his ear with his foot, earning a yelp as a response.

"Alright, lovebirds, no need for such extreme behaviour." Seokmin teased.

"Everytime you call Mingyu and I 'lovebirds', an actual couple dies."

"If I ever feel romantically attracted to Minghao, feel free to call the police. Or the hospital. Because it would be pretty much incest, and I'd obviously be delusional."

"Okay, we get it. I'm calling the next person, they're probably tired of waiting. Lee Chan!"

A boy with metallic-blue hair that seemed to be the youngest of all the contestants so far walked in. He bowed and gave a shy wave. "Hello, I'm Chan, thanks for having me here."

"Hi, and welcome to the stage." Seungcheol smiled. "What are you showing us today, kiddo?"

The boy cringed at being called "kiddo", but didn't show. "I'll be doing a DV8 inspired performance. I couldn't really try to reenact something by them, because, well, I can't get on that level. So, uh, the text I chose is a poem, the author is unknown, unfortunately. The song, well, it's a remix, and has an element of suprise, so I won't spoil it. So yeah, that's what I'll be doing."

"Fucking finally", Minghao raised his arms, as if thanking some higher being. "I've been waiting for someone to do some DV8. Good luck, dude."

Chan thanked him, and pulled a pen drive out of his pocket. He plugged it on the stereo and pressed play. A Michael Jackson song started playing, and he started dancing.

His moves were mesmerizing, sharp and precise. The song stopped, and he dropped to the floor, legs crossed and hands placed in front of them. He moved his hands to the left and to the right non-stop, and a new song started playing, this time a classic piece. He began reciting the poem and got up, never stopping moving. His body acted the words in a sort-of dance. It was a bittersweet poem about chasing your dreams. When the song reached it's climax, it changed again, now to a childish tune. Chan was on the ground again, mimicking baby steps. The song quickly changed again to an upbeat tune, and the poem was ending. The final verse was "I'll keep on following things I'm not sure if I'll achieve", and the song ended on a minor chord despite the happy premise.

Chan's final pose was right arm reaching behind him, back facing the audience.

After waiting a few seconds for good measure, he retrieved the pen drive and put it back on his pocket. He looked at the other boys, waiting for a reaction.

"That was good." Seungcheol smiled. "Minghao, oh great DV8 expert, what did you think?"

"You did great, dude. Definitely did them justice."

"Thank you so much!" Chan beamed. "Seriously, that is the best compliment ever. Thanks."

"I have a question." Soonyoung said. "Why the Michael Jackson song?"

"I'm a big fan. He's probably the reason I fell in love with performing, so I thought it was fitting for the number. You know, dreams and stuff."

"I like that minor chord at the end of the last song." Jihoon pointed out. "Very clever, starting happy and finishing with a sour taste. It connects with the poem, I liked it."

"Thank you." Chan bowed. "Again, thanks for having me here."

"Thanks for choosing us, we'll let you know if you made it!"

After the boy left, the others started chatting.

"It was cool. A little all-over-the-place, but cool."

"It's DV8, you don't need to get it at first glance. You probably won't, anyway."

"I'm calling the next one. Y'all ready?"

"Please never say 'y'all' again."

Chapter Text

Seven boring performances later, the boys were tired.

"I'm exhausted." Seungkwan complained, leaning his head on Seokmin's shoulder. "I'm so glad we're on break. I wouldn't be able to handle auditions during classes."

"Can we decide the results over text, just this once?" Junhui asked. "I need to go home, I'm hungry and tired and I need a shower."

"Yes please. I mean, we do have a groupchat now."

"Alright, let's talk about it on the chat." Seungcheol agreed. "I'm half-dead as well. I barely have the energy to walk home, I'm drained."

After saying quick byes, the boys split up to go to their houses. They were still at college, but chose to live with other group members instead of college dorms. Seungcheol, Soonyoung and Jihoon, commonly known as "leader line", lived together with Jeonghan. Seokmin, Mingyu and Minghao also lived together, along with Junhui, Minghao's cousin, and Seungkwan, Seokmin's bestfriend.

"Gyu." Seokmin poked the tall guy's cheek. "Are there any leftovers from yesterday's dinner?"

"I don't think so, we ate everything. Let's just order takeout or pizza."

(Mingyu was the official household cook, Junhui being the second-in-command.)

Later, the boys found themselves in the living room, with one box of pizza and a few of chinese takeout, Finding Nemo playing on the DVD and store-bought cake for dessert.

groupchat - theatre gays

dad: so lets start this debate

dad: everyones opinions r valid so dont b afraid 2 speak up

woozi: unless you want to accept someone because you think they're cute

woozi: in that case please keep it to yourself

boo: thats mean jihoonie let me be gay in peace

seokmeme changed the chat's name to "let me be gay in peace"

woozi: ... why do i even bother talking to you guys

memehao: oKAY LOSERS enough

NAEGAHOSH: i think we all agree on who stood out more right

gemini: indie rapper boy, guitar gloumov sunshine, wicked shakespeare and dv8 kid

dad: does everyone agree

woozi: yes

NAEGAHOSH: ye (jeonghan says yes)

boo: everyone here said yes

dad: cool

dad: now we need to decide

dad: do we accept all four of them or nah

seokmeme: id say we accept the 4 of them they were all really good

gemini: yeah but would they all be a good addition to the group i mean they are very talented of course but they need to click with us

gemini: idk i cant express myself

memegyu: no no i get u

memegyu: personally i think rapper boy would be good for us i mean ok we already have 2 rappers (three if we count haohao) BUT he's a good lyricist and creative and can help with the sound&lighting

NAEGAHOSH: speaking of creativity

NAEGAHOSH: shakespeare guy NEEDS to get in like cmon we all saw what he did if we let him go i will have the everlasting need to punch myself in the face

woozi: please do

NAEGAHOSH: not now jihoonie

dad: ok what abt this we need 2 present the pros and cons of accepting each one

dad: rapper boy, pros: creative, good lyrics, would b a good backstage minion

dad: cons: do we need another rapper??

dad: shakespeare guy, pros

memehao: everything tbh

dad: cons

gemini: we dont know if he can sing or dance

woozi: yeah most of our performances involve music and he didnt use any

dad: jeonghan says thats not enough to NOT accept him

memegyu: where IS jeonghan anyway

dad: on the couch too tired 2 hold his phone

NAEGAHOSH: we're reading the conversation for him

woozi: ^ they are. im not doing anything

dad: alright movin on to guitar guy, pros

memehao: really pretty voice

seokmeme: acting 10/10

gemini: creative

NAEGAHOSH: jeonghan says hes cute

woozi: i give up

dad: ignore jeonghan, lets think abt the cons

boo: i cant think of any

memegyu: if anything i'd say we dont know his full vocal range but when we accepted seungkwan we didnt know either and look at where we are now

memegyu: proud dads of our beautiful n talented maknae

boo: aw you guys <3

gemini: we dont know if he can dance but thats all

dad: jeonghan says (again) thats not enough to not accept him

woozi: jeonghan's opinion is biased he has no say in this

boo: thats unfair jihoonie let him be gay in peace

woozi: seungkwan im THIS close to kicking you out of the chat

seokmeme: if jeonghan cant share his thoughts on whether we accept guitar boy bc his opinion is biased does that mean kwannie cant share his thoughts on rapper boy's case?? honest question

boo: seokmin kindly fuck off

memehao: same goes for gyu n shakespeare guy lmao

memegyu: hao i trusted you

memehao: that was your mistake not mine

woozi: im saying this for the last time before i actually combust

woozi: being cute is not a legitimate reason for being accepted

angel: of course its not! if it were, we wouldnt have accepted soonyoung


seokmeme: what happened to being "too tired to hold your phone" or smth

angel: oh i still am

angel: just wanted to roast soonyoung

angel: im going back to the couch bye

NAEGAHOSH: the disrespect in this chat is unbelievable

dad: guys we r losing focus

memegyu: right sorry boss

dad: moving on to dv8 kid, pros

woozi: creative and clever

NAEGAHOSH: really good dancer

memehao: he likes dv8 i think thats a valid reason

gemini: minghao we cant accept someone just because they like the same things as you

memehao: says who

gemini: says rule book

memehao: i dont know her

dad: gUYS F O C U S

dad: lets talk abt the cons

boo: id say the perf was a bit unpolished but i mean

boo: he did A LOT of stuff n came up with almost all of it we cant expect everything to be perfect

memegyu: agreed

seokmeme: my point still stands we should accept everyone

NAEGAHOSH: me too i think they would all be good additions

dad: does everyone agree

dad: all those in favor of accepting the four of them say aye

seokmeme: aye

memehao: ayE

memegyu: aye aye

boo: aye

gemini: theyre cool

gemini: aye


woozi: i hope they're normal people and not soonyoungs 2.0

woozi: aye

NAEGAHOSH: jeonghan says aye

NAEGAHOSH: (rude, jihoonie. plain rude)

dad: so i guess its settled!!! woooo im gonaa add them


seokmeme: yeah dude dont add them just yet talk to them on private or call them

seokmeme: they're gonna flip just like we did if they get added to a random chat

dad: kay imma contact them

woozi: and type properly we dont want any misunderstandings


unknown number to hansolo

unknown number: hi is this chwe hansol

hansolo: ye

hansolo: who is this

unknown number: hi!! this is seungcheol from pledis' seventeen

unknown number: you're in dude welcome to the family

hansolo: !!!!!!!! FOR REAL????

unknown number: yeah man

unknown number: we have a groupchat can i add you?

hansolo: YEAH

unknown number: kay see u there bye


unknown number to josh

unknown number: hello is this hong jisoo's phone??

josh: yeah thats me, and you are...?

unknown number: seungcheol from pledis' seventeen

unknown number: good news man you're in!!!

josh: oH


unknown number: no problem lol do you want to join our groupchat

josh: sure!!!

unknown number: ok im gonna add you

unknown number: see u there!!


unknown number to wonwoo

unknown number: hello, this is seungcheol from pledis' seventeen, im guessing this is jeon wonwoo's phone?

wonwoo: yeah hi

unknown number: hi!! good news: you're in

unknown number: as in, you're a part of the group now

wonwoo: shit i wasn't expecting that

wonwoo: thank you so much!!!

unknown number: no need to thank us hahah hey can i add you on our groupchat

wonwoo: yeah man sure

unknown number: oKay see u there then, bye :)


unknown number to dino

unknown number: hi is this lee chan?

dino: yep, thats me

unknown number: hi im seungcheol from pledis' seventeen, and i bring good news

unknown number: you got accepted!!! congrats and welcome

dino: DUDE


dino: sorry im emotional

unknown number: no problem bro we all are honestly

unknown number: speaking of "we" can i add you to our groupchat

dino: YEs

unknown number: cool!! see you there :^)


groupchat - let me be gay in peace

dad added hansolo and 3 others to the groupchat

dad: hey gays these are our new members say hi and be nice

dad: i mean *guys

boo: no you dont

boo: hello im boo seungkwan, 19, musical theatre major and funny girl enthusiast

seokmeme: hi im lee seokmin, 20, musical theatre major as well and west side story enthusiast

memegyu: kim mingyu, 20, acting major, scenography minor and dog enthusiast

memehao: xu minghao, not 20 yet, dance major, fashion minor and ghibli studios enthusiast

gemini: wen junhui, 21, acting major and spicy food enthusiast

memehao: im also junhui's cousin but i pretend im not

gemini: you love me hao

angel: yoon jeonghan, not 22 yet, musical theatre major, cultural production minor and sleep enthusiast

woozi: lee jihoon, not 21 yet, music production major, performance arts minor and coffee enthusiast

NAEGAHOSH: kwon soonyoung, 21, double majoring in dance and scenography, yes i am dying, and SHINee enthusiast

dad: choi seungcheol, 22 in a month yay, theatre theory major, business minor and peace and quiet enthusiast

dad: so this is us!! feel free to introduce yourselves :^)

hansolo: hi im chwe hansol or vernon, 19, photography major, art history minor and tyler, the creator enthusiast

josh: hong jisoo (or joshua), not 22 yet, art history major, music theory minor and anime enthusiast

hansolo: josh is my cousin hes a weeb but hes cool

wonwoo: jeon wonwoo, 21 in a week, literature major, theatre theory minor and antonin artaud enthusiast

dino: lee chan, 18, dance major, acting minor and, you guessed it, michael jackson enthusiast

seokmeme: nice meeting all of you!! welcome to the family (ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧

NAEGAHOSH: wonwoo your username is boring

wonwoo: i cant think of a better one

NAEGAHOSH has changed wonwoo's name to "emo glinda"

emo glinda: i can live with that


dad: should we tell them what are our roles in the group??

dad: im the overall "leader" but honestly im not an authority at all

dad: im pretty much just a father figure and i direct our plays n stuff

woozi: i compose our original songs & co-direct

NAEGAHOSH: im in charge of most of the coreography and backstage stuff and of course the stage design, scenery and shizzle

seokmeme: we call those 3 "leader line" bc thats basically what they are

seokmeme: im a vocalist mostly

seokmeme: well i act of course but usually singing is included

boo: same here

angel: same here but i handle part of the paperwork, hook us up with cool places to perform and do everyone's makeup

gemini: i act mostly and dance sometimes and im full-time eye candy

gemini: i also sing but not that frequently

NAEGAHOSH: hes a really good singer (and dancer) guys

gemini: aw you flatter me <3

memehao: i dance mostly and im also in charge of stage garments

memehao: i do dance-acting performances quite often as well and sometimes i act (i rarely sing bc im not that good lol)

memegyu: LIES (seriously tho his voice is cute af trust me)

memehao: i WILL kick you

memegyu: aNYWAYS im an actor like 99% of the time, im a rapper on our musical performances and i help with backstage shabangs and scenery

NAEGAHOSH: gyuhao are my lil minions

angel: i wish i had at least one single minion to help me with makeup/paperwork

angel: you guys can't see but i'm glaring at both mingyu and seokmin

seokmeme: we're not even in the same house how can you glare at us

angel: dont doubt my glaring abilities

memegyu: jeonghan weve been over this none of us can do proper makeup

memegyu: i wore eyeliner like. once

memegyu: and i was 15

angel: aw but you are my fools :(( my loyal lackeys

woozi: why do i live with you

angel: because im nice and adorable and i pay the rent

emo glinda: i dont know anything about makeup but if you really need help with paperwork i think i can do it

emo glinda: i know how boring it can be lol

angel: really?? :0 thank u!!

angel: you're a good egg

angel: you fuckers should all follow his example

dad: oh are we decidind who is doing what?? it can wait if you guys want i understand if ur tired (we r too)

emo glinda: i dont know?? i just offered help idk

NAEGAHOSH: i have an idea

woozi: im scared

NAEGAHOSH: will i ever stop being roasted?? the world may never know

NAEGAHOSH: anyWAYS how about we meet up @ a cafe or smth to get to know each other better, in person

NAEGAHOSH: not today obviously

NAEGAHOSH: whenever is best for everyone :^)

memehao: this is, suprisingly, a good idea

memehao: we're on break so i guess its easier to choose a day

dad: we have to think abt everyone's jobs as well

dino: i dont have one ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

hansolo: lol same

josh: i dont have any upcoming gigs so its all good ^-^

seokmeme: dUDE you're a musician for a living?? thats so cool

josh: its not that glamorous haha but thanks!!

dad: is everyone free this saturday @ like 3 pm

josh: yes!!

dino: yeah

hansolo: yup

emo glinda: yes

memegyu: everyone here says yes

memegyu: ((hansol, chan, jisoo n wonwoo you might be confused at thats statement so im gonna explain: seokmin, hao, jun, kwannie and i live together))

dad: everyone here said yes as well ((soonyoung, jihoon, jeonghan n i live together as well))

NAEGAHOSH: so i guess its settled?? yAY

gemini: see you guys there!!

Chapter Text

Saturday came, and Mingyu was excited to properly meet the new members of the crew. Right now, he was looking at his closet trying to pick a proper outfit to cause a good impression.

"Just wear whatever you'd wear at a group hangout." Minghao said, impatiently. "It's basically the same thing, we're just adding four heads."

"You make it sound really morbid by saying 'four heads'." Junhui piped in.

"That's easy for you to say, Hao, you're studying fashion." Mingyu pouted. "Everything you wear is automatically a runway look." he pointed to said fashion student, who was wearing light blue jeans with holes — not rips, holes — on the knees, fishnets underneath it, a long sleeved blouse with some undergroud band's logo on it and creeper sneakers.

Minghao smirked "This is my casual getup."

"I know, and yet you still look like a model. It's infuriating."

"Fine, I'll help you."

Ten minutes later, Mingyu was ready, black skinny jeans with a white t-shirt that sported russian characters ("probably a swear word", as Minghao liked to say) tucked in. He tied a flannel on his waist and put on some old red sneakers.

"Good. Not too much, and not too less." Minghao approved. "I'm a genious."

"Thanks, Hao, I love you." Mingyu hugged his best friend and planted a sloppy kiss on his cheek.

"You're disgustingly affectionate, get off me."

"Ok, I'll be over there hugging the life out of Junhui."

"Yes, please. He's just as clingy as you, you deserve each other."

Mingyu grinned, sneaking another kiss, this time a peck on Minghao's nose, and went to the living room to cling onto Junhui. The younger chinese boy rolled his eyes, but couldn't hide the fondness in his smile.

Best friends. Gotta love 'em.


Meanwhile, on the Leader Line + Jeonghan household, chaos had settled in.

"I can't find the car keys!"

"Why do we need the car, we can walk there!"

"My ankles are sore, I don't want to walk!"

"Why are there socks on the fridge?"

"I left them there so they could cool and maybe help with my ankles' pain when I put them on."

"There's a spatula underneath my pillow. I'm leaving. See you at the cafe, please don't die, I don't want to pay the rent by myself."

"Wait, where's Jihoon?"

"Right here." Jihoon's voice sounded muffled.

"Shit." Soonyoung cursed. "I accidentally locked the closet door. Sorry, Jihoonie."

"How do you accidentally lock a door?"

"I was distracted, okay? My ankles are in pain, I can't think straight. I'm going to open the door, are you dressed?"

"Of course I am, I was locked for long enough to pick some clothes."

The clothes in question were really cute pastel orange overalls (rolled on the ankles because Jihoon's legs were too short) and a striped black and white t-shirt. Soonyoung's heart melted a little at the sight.

"Oh. You look really cute."

"What the fuck, Soonyoung." Jihoon deadpanned.

"The pain is clouding my thoughts so my brain to mouth filter isn't working, sorry."

"That doesn't even make sense, how can the pain on your ankles affect your brain? They're not even close to each other."

"I don't know! Cheol, did you find the car keys?"

"Working on it! I found the keys to my old bike, if it helps."

"It would be of great help, if you actually had the bike."

"Soonyoung, are you sure you can't walk?"

"I can try, but I'll probably be limping."

"I'll give you a piggyback ride when we get closer to the shop so you don't get too tired."

"Found the keys!" Jihoon yelled from the kitchen.

"Where were they?"

"Take a wild guess."

"The freezer?"

"The motherfucking freezer. Why is everything misplaced in this house? And why in the weirdest places? Couldn't it be inside the ceramic pot? Noooo, it has to be in the freezer."

"How did it even get there?"

"The real question is, are you tall enough to reach the freezer, Jihoon?"

Jihoon smacked Soonyoung upside the head after that comment.



Despite all the chaos, everyone got to the cafe on time. Actually, scratch that.

"Where's Wonwoo?" Seungcheol asked.

"He's probably stuck in traffic or something." Junhui supplied.

"Should we text him?"

"Already on it." Soonyoung unlocked his phone and opened their groupchat.

groupchat - let me be gay in peace

NAEGAHOSH: @emo glinda where u at

emo glinda: im going to be a little late you guys can start without me

emo glinda: dont worry, im okay, just late

emo glinda: be there in like 10

NAEGAHOSH: roger that bro

"He's just a little late, said he'll be here in 10 minutes."

"So, shall we start? We already know each other's majors and at least one interest, so that's cool; anyone wants to ask something? I suck at starting conversations."

"Who is who? Wait, that sounded really weird." Hansol smiled sheepishly. "What I mean is, we talked on the groupchat and I know everyone's names but I can't match names and faces."

The boys re-introduced themselves saying their names and giving a little wave sometimes.

"So", Jeonghan clapped once to get everyone's attention. "How did you guys get swooped into the performance world?"

"It was Josh's fault." Hansol playfully bumped shoulders with his cousin. "He is, if you haven't guessed yet, a diehard musical kid. Made me sit through Les Mis when I was 12. Needless to say, I didn't understand anything."

"You slept throught almost the whole thing!" Jisoo looked scandalized.

"Well, you took a 12 year-old to a 3 hour long play with heavy plot and big words, so whose fault is it? Anyway, I did find the concept very interesting, but I soon realized acting and singing aren't my thing, so, even though I love musical theatre a lot, thanks Josh, my reign is more writing lyrics, performing on stage with a cool beat, hyping the crowd up..."

"Nice. I think we're going to get along, kid." Seungcheol high-fived the boy.

"Well, my story is less complicated." Jisoo started. "I saw Wicked by accident on TV, they were broadcasting it when I was zapping, and fell in love. Started studying music, bought a guitar and here I am now." he smiled softly. "I got into acting a while later, though."

"You're really good at all of those things, you know." Seungcheol said, fondly. "Guitar, singing, acting..."

"Totally, dude." Seokmin added. "Don't tell anyone, but you were the best Gloumov I've ever seen."

Jisoo laughed at that, eyes sparkling and curving into crescents.

"Well, who's left is none other than our new maknae, Lee Chan!"

"It's not much, really." Chan played with the purple straw of his iced coffee. "It started with MJ, then musicals, then DV8 and now I'm here." he smiled.

"It feels good not to be the maknae anymore." Seungkwan sighed. "I'm happy to pass the torch to you, Chan." he said, dramatically.

"And I'm happy to accept it."

The whole table laughed at both boy's antics. A little after that, they were startled by a new voice:

"Hm... Hi?" they all turned to see Wonwoo, a little out of breath, black hair slightly disheveled.

"Hello!" Soonyoung waved enthusiastically. "Come sit here with us!"

He walked over to the table, sitting next to Soonyoung.

"Sorry, I actually just got off of work. My shift ends at 3 and it's not far so I fast-walked. Turns out I'm really out of shape."

"Why didn't you tell us? We could have met at 4 to give you some time to breathe."

"Yeah, but everyone said they were free at 3 so it wouldn't be too nice if I was the only person to say I wasn't."

"What's not nice is you having to run here all the way from work. Tell us next time?"

He nodded.

"Also, what happened to your emo aesthetic, man?" Junhui asked.

Wonwoo looked down at his mint green oversized sweater, brown messenger bag hanging off one shoulder and round specs perched on his nose.

"I work at a library. Gotta match their aesthetic, I can't really wear leather jackets there, can I? Well, unless maybe if I worked at the CD section, which I don't. Anyway, I'm actually a big nerd, sweaters are 75% of my wardrobe and I have really bad eyesight."

"You weren't wearing glasses at your audition, though."

"On purpose, so I couldn't see the audience properly. Helps with stage fright and anxiety, way better than that 'picture everyone on their underwear' nonsense. I wonder if that ever worked for someone."

"It doesn't work", Junhui shook his head in disappointment. "I tried it once and ended up developing a crush on the boy sitting on the third row because the underwear vision of him my brain provided was really hot."

Everyone laughed.

"I remember that day." Minghao said. "He came home, slammed the door open and said, 'Hao, the underwear trick sucks'. It was iconic, because I didn't know the context, so the first thing I thought was 'bitch fucked up my laundry and destroyed my underwear' or something."

"Stop making fun of your elders, Myungho."

"Hm, so, I hate to make this awkward but I have to ask." Seungcheol fiddled with his thumbs. "If you couldn't guess from the chat's name, pretty much all of us are a little gay, I hope you don't have a problem with that. If you do, well..."

"Nah, no problem." Hansol waved his hand in a reassuring manner. "I'm gay too, so."

"Same." Jisoo fist-bumped his cousin.

"And same." Wonwoo smiled.

"Well, not same." Chan raised his hand. "I mean, kind of. Do you guys know what asexuality is?"

"Yeah, man." Seungcheol nodded. "Minghao made sure to educate us all after he came out."

The younger's eyes widened and he turned to look at Minghao. "You're ace too?"

"And proud as fuck." the brown-haired boy smiled and the two exchanged a high-five.

They continued with the playful conversations until Mingyu said it was getting late and he needed to cook dinner. He asked if the new members wanted to come over, but they politely declined, not wanting to take up on the boy's time.

"It's really no big deal", he said. "But I understand. I plan on doing a group dinner some time, though, so don't go thinking you will never taste my cooking, because you will. You just escaped for now." he added, playfully.

Later on, the groupchat started buzzing with new messages.

groupchat - let me be gay in peace



woozi: its not a ritual soonyoung you were just drunk



woozi: its not a tradition if you legitimated it by writing it on a napkin, smacking your fist on the table, while being drunk out of your ass

angel: we threw away the napkin while you werent watching

NAEGAHOSH: thats straight up heartless

josh: what tradition are you talking about?

woozi: its nothing, soonyoung is just stupid

NAEGAHOSH: show your elder some respect jihoonie

woozi: you're not even six months older than me shut the fuck up

seokmeme: lol fight

memehao: lol fight

boo: lol fight

memegyu has changed the groupchat's name to "lol fight"

woozi: and the cycle of idiots is complete.

NAEGAHOSH: anyways josh you asked abt the tradition

NAEGAHOSH: i started it on a beautiful, yet drunken, night

NAEGAHOSH: we had just accepted junnie, haohao, seokminnie and seungkwannie to our crew and i was feeling very emotional and full of love

woozi: (that was the alcohol talking)

NAEGAHOSH: dont spoil the mood jihoonie

NAEGAHOSH: anyway so i needed to show how thankful i was for their existence

memegyu: so his drunk ass just went there and kissed junhui square on the lips lmao

hansolo: lmao yall call this a date

memehao: ^ thank you for that hansol

NAEGAHOSH: then i was scared the others would feel left out so i kissed them too

boo: he didnt kiss me on the mouth tho thank god

boo: imagine having to live knowing your first kiss was with soonyoung

woozi: i would ask for my mouth to be surgically removed and replaced

NAEGAHOSH: ok you know what

NAEGAHOSH: jihoon is just jealous because his first kiss was because of a spin the bottle game

woozi: lets not talk about that

memehao: lol he didnt kiss me on the mouth either

memehao: i told him "dude you probably taste like satan's piss get away from my lips"

memehao: and he deadass blew a raspberry on my stomach then kissed my nose 3 times

NAEGAHOSH: hey its not my fault if your nose is very kissable xiao haohao

memegyu: agreed

gemini: agreed

angel: agreed

seokmeme: agreed

boo: never thought about that

memehao: thank you for not having a nose kink seungkwan

boo: but now that i think about it, agreed

memehao: there he goes

dad: stop bullying lil hao

memehao: thank you

emo glinda: so the introductory ritual is a kiss from soonyoung

woozi: theres no ritual stop encouraging him

NAEGAHOSH: i can hear and feel your jealousy ji

NAEGAHOSH: he got into the group before the tradition started so hes sad bc i didnt kiss him ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

woozi: honestly if i wanted a kiss from you id ask

woozi: weve known each other for god knows how long if i wanted to be kissed that badly i would have asked

woozi: so collect yourself

hansolo: ,,,i feel tension in the air

angel: im in the same room as them i can see the tension

boo: Yikes

dad: yikes indeed

angel: at least theyre not roomates that would be bad

dad: yh but ur rooming with soonyoung who sulks in silence

dad: jihoon is going 2 wake me up @ 4 am to vent to me abt how stupid soonie is

angel: lol ur best friend, ur responsability

memegyu: does he really call soonyoung "soonie" or

woozi: i did ONCE

woozi: in a moment of weakness

NAEGAHOSH: he usually calls me "no", "what the fuck" or "permanent headache"

seokmeme: is the tension over are they friends again

angel: the tension never goes away if you know what i mean but yes they stopped sulking

angel: soonyoung said sorry, jihoon nodded and punched his arm

angel: they are good

woozi: we are

NAEGAHOSH: we get mad at each other sometimes bc my mouth has no filter and jihoon takes things too seriously

dad: (jihoon is also emotionally constipated but he doesnt realize that)

woozi: im really not whatever this is

woozi: but soonyoung is right its nothing too serious we have an argument, say things we dont mean, stay upset for a while and then make up

NAEGAHOSH: and sometimes he roasts me but hes joking

woozi: lol im not

NAEGAHOSH: see? friendly insults

hansolo: aw cute

emo glinda: am i allowed to roast soonyoung too

memehao: everyone in this chat is allowed to roast soonyoung

memegyu: including soonyoung himself

memehao: yeah but hes too weak for that

emo glinda: good to know

NAEGAHOSH: why would u want to roast me what have i done

emo glinda: idk its fun

gemini: lol i like him

emo glinda: ha thanks

NAEGAHOSH: i feel so attacked

memehao: lmao you should

NAEGAHOSH: where is my bro my main man my sidekick seokmin pls defend my honor

seokmeme: i mean


memehao: he just said "i mean"

memehao: chill

seokmeme: as i was saying

seokmeme: i lov you lots soonyoung but i cant stop the roasting i am but a single small birb facing a bunch of eagles or somthing

dad: seokmin are you high

seokmeme: high on happiness

seokmeme: gyu cooked dinner im happy

boo: the question is when are you not tbh


gemini: get your own cook


Chapter Text

groupchat - lol fight

dad: first official meeting as a group, @ pledis, tomorrow!!

dad: newbies ask the cool janitor guy where seventeen's room is he will show you the way

dino: which cool janitor guy

dad: the only one there is

dad: the only janitor with purple hair it will b easy 2 find him


groupchat - lol fight

gemini: is everyone on their way

dad: yes we're leaving now

dad: i couldnt find the car keys

angel: a g a i n

gemini: pls hurry mingyu is bored and minghao thought it would be a good idea to teach him now to do a cartwheel and i really fear for gyu's life

gemini: i need more people to control the situation

NAEGAHOSH: how much y'all wanna bet that hao is teaching him wrong moves just so he can fall

boo: do us a favor and never say "y'all" again thank you very much

emo glinda: oh. shjt i jsut woke up sprry

woozi: how the fuck

woozi: its literally 3 in the afternoon

emo glinda: i may or may not have gone to sleep at 7 am

NAEGAHOSH: lmao what a party animal we would have never guessed

emo glinda: actually i was writing and lost track of time

emo glinda: im allergic to parties ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

emo glinda: dont worry i dont live far and i have a bike so i'll be there soon

gemini: what kind of bike

emo glinda: the fast kind, with engines


hansolo: josh and i got lost sorry

josh: chan is with us

gemini: ok take ur time

woozi: i thought you were in the middle of chaos or something

gemini: i was

gemini: mingyu fell so i guess he learned his lesson


In a few minutes, all 13 boys were gathered in a room that resembled a classroom. The walls were cream-coloured, with light curtains framing the windows. As an addition to the room there was another, with a mirror wall, smooth wooden floor and a ballet bar on the side. It was their dance practice room, and a glass door separated it from the first one.

"So," Seungcheol started after they all sat in a circle on the floor. "I think, before we do anything, we should decide what Jisoo, Hansol, Chan and Wonwoo will do, what their positions in the group would be."

Everyone nodded in agreement.

"I would like to add that those positions are not like permanent commitments or anything like that." Jeonghan said. "It's not choosing your job or marrying someone, it's a flexible concept and it can change."

"Also, you can choose not to have one if you don't feel like it." Soonyoung smiled. "We started working like this because it makes things easier, but it's perfectly fine if the positions system isn't for you."

"Jobs and marriage aren't permanent either, Jeonghan." Junhui commented.

"Shut up, it was a comparision."

"A bad one, then."

"Ok, ok." Seungkwan used the mom voice again. He turned to the new members and asked: "So, what would you like to do?"

"Well," Hansol raised his hand. "As I said a few times before, I'm a very bad actor so that's a no. I'm a lyricist and rapper, I can handle sound engineering, I know my way around reflectors and stuff, and people say I have a good eye for lighting. So I guess I could also be a backstage minion."

"Yes!" Soonyoung pumped his fist in the air. "That means I have 3 minions now. Thanks, Hansol, your help will be very much appreciated."

"As well as your writing and performing skills." Seungcheol added, with a double thumbs-up. "Who's next?"

"I'd like to stick with the basics, singing and acting." Jisoo said. "And if you ever need a guitarist, well, I could do it, but I guess that's not a very likely thing to happen."

"Who knows, man." Seokmin shrugged. "You never know what's going on in Jihoon's mind. He might as well plan a musical that only has guitar sounds, no lines."

Jihoon rolled his eyes and everyone started laughing. Chan raised his hand next.

"I can act and dance! I'm not very confident in my singing, though."

"That's fine." Jihoon assured. "We appreciate you anyways, the dancing and acting are enough."

"Guys, look." Minghao pointed. "Jihoon is soft."

"I am NOT."

"Who wouldn't be? It's Chan. He's the cutest, an actual baby, who wouldn't be soft for him?" Jeonghan pinched Chan's cheeks. "I wish I could adopt you."

"Sometimes I wonder why I'm friends with you." Seuncheol glared at the long-haired boy, who stuck his tongue at the oldest. "Enough of that. Last but not least... Wonwoo."


"Are you alive? Functioning? Is your brain awake? I mean, you woke up less than an hour ago."

"To answer all of your questions, respectively: I don't know, are we? Yes. Kind of, like 70%." the black-haired boy rubbed his face. "Fuck, I forgot my glasses."

"How come you didn't notice that before?" Seungkwan asked. "We're probably blurs for you right now."

"You are, and I did notice. I just thought it was sleep clouding my eyes." he blinked slowly. "To be honest, it probably is, too."

"So, do you want a specific role in the group?"

"Yeah, I do, I would really like to write our stuff. I can come up with ideas and adapt plays as well. I guess I can also act if needed."

"'I guess I can also act'," Soonyoung mocked. "Dude. You're an amazing actor, don't sell yourself short like that."

Wonwoo blushed at the compliment, thanking him with a shy smile.

"When can we read something you wrote?" Mingyu asked. "No pressure, I'm just curious. But take your time with showing us your words."

"Actually," the boy started shuffling through his bag. "I brought a few poems. I wrote them today, I was feeling inspired, that's why I stayed up all night." He handed a few torn notebook pages to Jihoon, who was closer to him. "They're fruit of a sleep deprived brain, so they may not be good, but it's raw content so I thought it was best for first impressions."

Jihoon nodded slowly, focused on the words. Then, he spoke up.

"Cheol. Take a look at this."

Fuck, Wonwoo thought, it sucks. It's beyond terrible and I'm gonna get kicked out.

The leader took the papers and read through all of them.

"They look like-"

"Lyrics." Jihoon finished. "Rap lyrics."

"Really?" the writer was surprised. "I didn't think about music while writing them at all. I mean, I enjoy music a lot but I don't think I'm good at it."

"Let's see." Seungcheol grabbed one poem and passed the rest to the others. "Read them, guys. Jihoonie, do you have some pre-mades in your laptop? I think this one works with a regular 4/4."

The lavender haired producer fussed with his laptop, opening a folder labeled "premades", then another labeled "reg 4/4" and clicking one of the multiple audio files. A catchy beat started to play on a tiny bluetooth speaker. Seungcheol cleared his throat and started rapping a verse, reading it from the paper in his hand.

It sounded nice, a bit rusted because the words were unfamiliar, but good nonetheless. The oldest gave the poem back to Wonwoo. "Your turn. Try rapping the rest. Just do what I did, on your own way."

Wonwoo froze. It wasn't an easy task; he'd never done this before, and he couldn't screw it up. Jihoon pressed play, and he listened to the beat for a while before starting. He gave his best, that's for sure. After he finished, he looked up to the others expectantly.

"Just as I expected." Seungcheol smiled. "That was good."

"You're a natural, man." Soonyoung reached over to pat his shoulder.

"I don't know why you're surprised." Minghao said, already splayed on the floor (they still hadn't found a surface where Minghao couldn't lie on). "I'm his fan. Even though he's a Shakespeare nerd."

"Shakespeare is good and he was an icon, okay?" Wonwoo protested. "The Elizabethan theatre would be nothing without him."

"The Elizabethan theatre would be nothing without Elizabeth. Is it called Shakespearian theatre? Hm, I don't think so."

"Alright, children." Jeonghan patted both of their heads. "We get it, you're both nerds that like different nerd things." A pause. "What do we do now that everything is settled?"

"Well, we did need to start planning this year's showcase." Seungcheol suggested.

There was a choir of "no"'s, varying between whiny, loud and lazy tones.

"I want to do something fun!" Soonyoung clinged to the leader's arm. "Please?"

The oldest sighed. "Fine, but no alcohol. At least, not for you."


Turns out Soonyoung didn't need alcohol to get emotional. The boys had ordered pizza and put on some music, opting for just having fun on their room, since the company allowed.

The choreographer was currently sitting against the glass door, looking fondly at the new members.

"I'm already so attached to them." he sighed dramatically. Junhui, who was by his side, snorted.

"I can't tell if you're a drama queen or just a big fluffball."

"Probably both." Soonyoung's face then lit up in realization, and he stood up from the floor. "GUYS! The welcoming ritual! We need to do it."

"No, we don't." Jihoon protested. "It's creepy, weird, and unnecessary."

"It's not like your opinion matters, Jihoonie, I'm welcoming the new members, not you." he stuck his tongue out at the shorter. He turned to the new guys. "Is it ok with you? I'm not kissing you on the lips, unless you want to." he gave a cheeky smirk.

The four boys addressed said they were ok with the "ritual" — "you're not drunk this time, so it's cool", Jisoo had stated —, so Soonyoung asked them to form a line in front of him. They did as they were told.

First, there was Chan.

"Sir Lee Chan, precious maknae, dancer and actor, I welcome you." Soonyoung said, solemnly. "To seal our friendship, a kiss on the forehead for you." he pecked the younger's forehead.

Then, there was Hansol.

"Sir Chwe Hansol Vernon, cool guy, indie rapper and backstage minion, I welcome you. To seal our friendship, kisses on the cheek for you." He kissed both of the boy's cheeks, rather noisily for extra effect.

Then, Jisoo.

"Sir Hong Jisoo-slash-Joshua, soft bro, singer, actor and guitarist, I welcome you. To seal our friendship, kisses on the hands for you." he took Jisoo's hands and kissed his knuckles, then added: "Blessed kisses for blessed guitar fingers."

Lastly, there was Wonwoo.

"Sir Jeon Wonwoo, huge nerd, writer, actor and newfound rapper, I welcome you. To seal our friendship, I can't think of a new place to kiss. The only option left are your lips so I need to ask if that's ok." the other boy shrugged ("why not") so he continued. "To seal our friendship, may I emphasize the term friendship, because it's a platonic kiss, you assholes, a kiss on the lips for you." and so he did. It was a quick peck, with no second intentions behind it, indeed.

Minghao, Mingyu, Seokmin and Seungkwan were yelling "EW" while Hansol and Chan were making multiple finger-hearts around them. The older members were just laughing at the whole display.

"Ha. That was fun." Soonyoung was proud of his welcoming ritual. "Thanks for not making this awkward." he elbowed Wonwoo.

"No problem."

"See?" he raised his voice, addressing everyone. "This is how you deal with things. Wonwoo is indeed a good egg."

"I'm tired." Seungkwan whined, rolling on the floor.

"It's not even late." Jihoon replied.

"I woke up early. I need a nap."

"Then take your nap."

"We're in our practice room, I can't nap here."

"I think we should call this a day, anyway." Seungcheol entered the conversation. "We're not getting anythig done, that's for sure."

"My mom called." Mingyu lifted his phone and shook it, for emphasis. "She needs me to run some errands for her."

"Living close to your parents has it's perks but also downsides." Minghao patted his friend on the back.

"It's not a downside, I don't mind." he paused, and turned to the other boy. "Wanna tag along?"

"I don't, actually, but you're going to whine and give me the sad puppy-dog eyes if I say no, so I guess I don't have a choice."

"Thanks, Hao, you're the best." he started to lean in for a hug, but Minghao dodged.

"No. You're lucky your mother is a nice woman who deserves my kindness. I'm doing this for her, not you."

The other boys in the room started to laugh at the two's antics.


groupchat - lol fight

memegyu: you guys wont believe it

boo: what

seokmeme: spill

memegyu: minghao just picked a fight with an old lady

hansolo: gold

dad: how did that even happen

gemini: stop texting us and record it omg

memegyu: ok so we're at the grocery store and i have a shopping list and one of the items is asparagus and i told hao to fetch it for me

memegyu: but the vegetables aisle is shit and there are almost no good veggies and the old lady needed it too

seokmeme: they are fighting over food this is amazing


memegyu: "im sorry i think ur eyesight has gone poor this is clearly an eggplant"

memegyu: then shes like "dont try to trick me young man i've been shopping for asparagus for longer than you're alive" true tbh

memegyu: and hao "ok then grams if you want to put a fucking eggplant on your asparagus salad then be my guest, im going to grab the REAL asparagus"

memegyu: im wheezing he is walking over to where the eggplants are

seokmeme: minghao is a gift to mankind

boo: me: i dont like boys

boo: minghao: *picks a fight with an old lady over asparagus*

boo: me: i like ONE boy

gemini: seungkwan you like boys

gemini: like, in general

boo: its a fucking meme

memehao: did mingyu just do what i think he did

memehao: broadcast my fight with gertrude on our chat

dad: ur literally shopping with him ask him

hansolo: lol was she really called gertrude

memehao: arent all old ladies called gertrude

memegyu: hao stop texting and help me carry the bags

memehao: nope

memegyu: the disrespect,

hansolo: take this as an opportunity to train weight lifting

seokmeme: yeah man get dem Guns

memegyu: no you dont understand even if i could carry their weight there are a lot of bags theres no space left on my arms

memegyu: minghao just vanished

memehao: im at the store's lil drugstore looking for hair dye

memegyu: well get your ass back here you ARE helping with the bags

memehao: ok dumbass ill be right there

memegyu: update im w hao and apparently he can carry more bags than me im offended

boo: get rekt

seokmeme: gyu is such a soft person his body is also starting to become cotton candy

memegyu: this is bad i need to work out more

boo: you need to work out, period

boo: mingyu youve never set foot on a gym like ever

memegyu: neither did you

boo: i dont need to, im a healthy person already

memegyu: so am i?????

seokmeme: yeah but you cant lift grocery bags

memegyu: neither can you????

seokmeme: yeah but do i need to? no

seokmeme: you, on the other hand.......

memegyu: why did you all decide to roast me

boo: soonyoung is not online

seokmeme: you're our substitute target

memegyu: fuckers

memegyu: gtg hao told me to stop texting bc im slowing him down

boo: lol have a safe trip

Chapter Text


NAEGAHOSH: we've been a group of 13 for more than a week now

dad: congrats to us!!!

NAEGAHOSH: this also means... we missed wonwoo's birthday

angel: we did what now

NAEGAHOSH: when we added our new fantastic four to the chat he said he turned 21 in a week but more than a week has passed

gemini: o shit

emo glinda: oops

NAEGAHOSH: dont "oops" me young man you should have told us

emo glinda: didnt want to cause unecessary fuss

NAEGAHOSH: since when is a birthday "unnecessary"

woozi: soonyoung just because you wake up at midnight and start yelling ITS MY BIRTHDAY then proceed to demand presents doesnt mean everyone does as well


emo glinda: its ok soonyoung really

emo glinda: i dont care about birthdays that much

emo glinda: i dont care about parties or presents either

NAEGAHOSH: but everyone likes presents

emo glinda: i do like them but i can live without them you know

emo glinda: birthdays are eh

NAEGAHOSH: ok im sensing there is a hidden reason here but i wont ask bc ur clearly not comfortable and i respect that

emo glinda: thanks

NAEGAHOSH: now changing the subject

NAEGAHOSH: what do you guys think of brecht

emo glinda: i like him

emo glinda: more than that fake bitch stanislavski

dad: omg did u really call stan a fake bitch

emo glinda: did you really call that fake bicth "stan"???

NAEGAHOSH: would you take a look at that

woozi: its a fight between drama theorists never thought id see one of those

woozi: they are usually chill people

emo glinda: i have no chill when it comes to dissing stanislavski

emo glinda: or defending artaud but lets not get into that otherwise i WILL write an essay

memehao: nERD

NAEGAHOSH: where did you come from

memehao: hell

seokmeme: like we didnt know that

memegyu: wow we live with an actual demon

woozi: how the fuck are you three always together

memegyu: we're platonic soulmates

seokmeme: like buy one get 2 for free

boo: you said the same thing about gag trio you traitor

NAEGAHOSH: bro dont leave us like that

memehao: honestly i think theres plenty of seokmin for both gangs

NAEGAHOSH: i love how minghao has this special ability to turn every sentence into something really shady or morbid

woozi: "gangs"

josh: i just got here whats a gag trio

woozi: the three stooges aka soonyoung seokmin and seungkwan

boo: aka booseoksoon

josh: cute

seokmeme: we are

gemini: i love how the theorist fight thing now lies forgotten bc of your antics

dad: ngl i probably would have lost the fight

dad: but guys serious talk for a bit

dad: we need 2 start working on the showcase, come up with something

angel: do we have to meet up to do that?

dad: hm i dont think so

angel: so we can talk about it here right

NAEGAHOSH: it solves the whole "setting up a day when everyone's free" problem

dad: cool so r we starting right now?? everyone has 2 b online

josh: hansol is sleeping

memehao: wake him up

dad: nO DONT

dad: minghao please stop inciting the chaos

dad: jisoo you can let the kid sleep we'll talk later

josh: ok

seokmeme: guys isnt it funny how jihoon, chan and i have the same last name but we're not related

woozi: that doesnt make any sense

woozi: also where did that come from

NAEGAHOSH: who says you're not related maybe you are

woozi: soonyoung no

NAEGAHOSH: maybe theres a removed cousin or step aunt there somewhere you never know

NAEGAHOSH: who knows maybe mingyu IS related to that cute acting senior

seokmeme: what if im related to one of our teachers i mean there are plenty of lees on campus

woozi: thats why it doesnt make sense

angel: does that mean i might be related to that adorable high school boy who attended makeup classes with me

angel: cool he could be my lost little brother

hansolo: hi good morning

woozi: *night

hansolo: shit really????

dad: hansol look outside your window its already dark

hansolo: oops guess whos gonna stay up all night again

josh: seriously

hansolo: sorry josh i think my sleep schedule just doesnt wanna be fixed

dad: okay who is online we need to start deciding things

angel: im here

hansolo: yo

josh: hi

woozi: me


boo: up

seokmeme: we

memegyu: are

memehao: here

dad: did booseoksoon and 97 line just fuse

woozi: never do that again i dont think my brain can handle it

emo glinda: hi i was lurking

gemini: i was playing neko atsume but you guys never shut up so i guess ignoring you is useless


memehao: phnoe

woozi: not now myungho

dad: everyone is here!!!!! cool so any ideas

NAEGAHOSH: new guys dont be afraid to suggest stuff i know it might feel like ur intruding or smth but thats nt true

memegyu: yeah all ideas are welcome

gemini: honestly you're probably more creative than us old souls

dino: hm i might have an idea idk if it works because it might be like a lot of work and also take up a lot of performing time

josh: how much time do we have for the showcase?

dad: as much as we need as long as its not absurd like 4+ hours

woozi: and also as longs as we give the audience a break like an intermission or smth

josh: cool

angel: chan tell us your idea my child

dino: ok so

dino: we all have like different ish talents/abilities or w/e i mean everyone is good at everything but theres just something special u know

dad: ok im following

memehao: "everyone is good at everything" not really mingyu cant dance for SHIT

woozi: minghao i usually appreciate and indulge your snarky comments but let the kid talk

memehao: alright alright soz

dino: so like we could split into 3 teams for separated performances and then do an actual play as a whole

woozi: the play couldnt be very long though

dino: yeah thats why i was worried abt the time

dino: also that would be a lot of things to plan and stuff so i understand if you turn down the idea

NAEGAHOSH: actually i think its pretty cool

gemini: did you think about who would be on each team?? and what the teams would be??

dino: yea

dino: it would be like the rappers, the vocalists and the dancers i guess you know who would be on each team

dad: its an interesting division i like it

dino: thanks!!!!

dad: everyone express your opinions dont be ghosties

seokmeme: i like that a lot

boo: me too

hansolo: me three

angel: me four, how did you come up with this?

dino: i have a lot of free time to kill

angel: cant relate

angel: but understandable

memegyu: yep that would be cool!!

memehao: im glad that im not on gyu's team

gemini: you're on mine~

memehao: fuck

memehao: be gone, foul demon

hansolo: lol minghao is like my favorite person on this chat

memehao: thank you hansol my one and only fan

hansolo: the first of many

seokmeme: o shit that was deep

memehao: bRUH you cnat just go and say shit like that out of nowhere

memehao: but thanks

memehao: i refuse to use emojis so i have to state that im smiling

memegyu: hes deadass blushing

memegyu: hiding behind his hands and all

seokmeme: hansol you managed to make minghao BLUSH

seokmeme: thats straight up sorcery if you ask me

NAEGAHOSH: yer a wizard hansolie

memehao: motherfuckers i didnt give you the right

boo: honestly minghao likes to put up this "dont fuck with" façade and ok i guess hes right dont fuck with him but deep down inside he likes being complimented

gemini: unfortunately our xiao haohao isnt really used to compliments and kind gestures so :-/

hansolo: wait shit really??

hansolo: did i make him feel bad or smth

memegyu: no silly didnt we tell you he was similing and happy and stuff

memegyu: its just

memegyu: long ass story and not ours to tell so

hansolo: ok i understand

NAEGAHOSH: i feel an awkward vibe hanging

woozi: no shit sherlock

seokmeme: we dived into deep waters

dad: im gonna ask again seokmin are you high

seokmeme: nope

memehao: he really isnt

NAEGAHOSH: thats exactly what a high person would say

memehao: yeah but you asked him not me so



memehao: lol i was joking where would i even get drugs

seokmeme: true

gemini: and showcase talk lies forgotten

dad: yeah right we shoukd get back to that

dad: who else hadnt expressed an opinion yet

hansolo: hm jisoo went to sleep and told me to tell you that he likes the idea

NAEGAHOSH: ok who wants to bet wonu is lurking again

emo glinda: what did you just call me

NAEGAHOSH: there he is

emo glinda: but yeah the idea is great

dino: thanks guys!!!!

seokmeme: chan is so pure what did we do to deserve him

dino: <3

dad: so i guess its settled!!

dad: there will be plenty of work for everyone so be prepared

dad: jihoonie where u at

woozi: 1) dont call me that you soggy bell pepper

dad: r00d

woozi: 2) we are in the same house

dad: ok ok id come over to our room but its just a simple question i dont need to bother u any furher

woozi: ok ask

dad: do you think you can come up with an original script

woozi: yeah i guess

woozi: i mean ive done it before

woozi: but we do have an official writer now

dad: shoot i forgot

dad: wonu

emo glinda: why is everyone calling me that

dad: easier to type

dad: can you come up with an original script

emo glinda: i can try but i will most likely need jihoons help

woozi: its alright

NAEGAHOSH: jihoonie can you come up with original /songs/ for the teams??

woozi: ,, fINE i guess that is my job here anyways

NAEGAHOSH: yaayy thanks <3

woozi: can i go now

dad: ye

woozi: ok goodnight losers

seokmeme: is it just me or jihoon complained abt cheol calling him jihoonie but didnt bat a metaphorical eyelash at soonyoung doing the same thing

hansolo: lmao exposed

memehao: ok for the sake of this chat i will not send a lenny face but imagine i did

memegyu: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

memehao: you just had to ruin everything didnt you

Chapter Text

groupchat - lol fight

memehao: i just woke up to seungkwan and seokmin having a high note battle

memehao: please end my life

hansolo: who won

gemini: i did

gemini: threw a pillow at both of them to shut them up and threatened to take their breakfast privileges off

boo: look,,, i won

boo: before junhui ruined our fun

gemini: you ruined my sleep its only fair

memehao: for once i agree with junhui

hansolo: sounds like a fun household

memehao: it isnt

memehao: my will to live gets tested everyday

memegyu: hey who wants ice cream

angel: stop blowing up my phone withh notifs i want to sleep

memehao: mute the chat asshole

hansolo: i want ice cream

memegyu: cool i'll bring it to you where u at

hansolo: my humble abode

hansolo: aka the shitty dorm i share with josh

memegyu: i live off campus the ice cream would melt

hansolo: fuk

seokmeme: come have breakfast with us hansol

seokmeme: bring josh

boo: are we really ignoring the fact that mingyu is offering ice cream at 9 in the morning

memegyu: i made too much

hansolo: did u MAKE the ice cream???

memegyu: ye its standard vanilla w chocolate chips and strawberry syrup

hansolo: text me your address i need to try this shit

seokmeme: bro are you really coming over??

hansolo: i guess??? if it isnt okay i understand tho

seokmeme: its not that we just really need to clean up the place

hansolo: it cant be worse than my place so everythings fine


"I cannot believe Mingyu invited Hansol over to eat ice cream for breakfast." Minghao sighed, rubbing his still sleepy eyes.

"Look, it will be a good bonding moment!" Mingyu replied, brightly.

"I'm not saying it won't, I'm just saying it could be under less weird circumstances."

They were cleaning up the apartment, despite what Hansol had said on the chat earlier. Minghao and Seungkwan were still wearing pajamas.

"Put on some proper clothes, you two." Junhui said. "Look presentable, for once."

"I don't have to 'look presentable' at my own house, fuck off." Minghao plopped down on the couch and started fiddling with his phone. He opened the groupchat.

groupchat - lol fight

emo glinda: hey can i come to ice cream fest

memehao: probably yea lemme check with the housewife

memehao: (thats gyu if ur wondering)

"Hey, dumbass." Minghao called.

"Which one?" Mingyu and Seokmin both answered.

"Tall dumbass. Wonwoo wants to come over for ice cream as well."

"Okay, sure. I think there's enough for everyone."

groupchat - lol fight

memehao: thumbs up for you

emo glinda: yay

emo glinda: do you need me to bring anything like toast or coffee

memehao: idk

memegyu: nah just bring yourself

emo glinda: i'll bring coffee just for good measure



"Help me pick something cool to wear."

"Mingyu, we're at home, just dress the way you would if Soonyoung was over or something." then, a mischievous glint passed through the younger's eyes. "Oh, is this about Wonw-"

"No! I just want to look like a good host."

"I'm also a host and look at what I'm wearing." Minghao clasped his friend's shoulder. "You're fine."

"I hate the fact that even your pajamas are fashionable."

"My shirt literally says 'fuck Gucci', how is this fashionable?"

"It has attitude."

"Your bunny slippers have attitude as well. Don't sweat it, they're chill people, they won't care about anything but the ice cream, to be honest."

Mingyu sighed, but agreed. Hansol and Wonwoo said they would be there in a few minutes so he headed to the living room — he had the decency to at least put a nice towel on the table they would be eating breakfast/ice cream. Seungkwan had already changed to something that wasn't old pajamas, while Minghao stubbornly remained dressed in the "fuck Gucci" t-shirt and Yoda boxers.

Soon, the rumble of a motorbike could be heard, and a few moments later the doorbell rang. Junhui opened the door and was surprised to see both Wonwoo and Hansol, not just one of them.

"Did you come together?" he asked, motioning for the boys to come inside.

"We actually live on the same building, so yeah." Hansol shrugged. "I found out like, last week."

"I still can't believe we've never met before." Wonwoo laughed. "I've been living there since I started uni and I've never seen you. Like, ever."

"It's because I'm a cryptid who never leaves the dorm."

"Makes sense."

Mingyu interrupted them to announce breakfast was ready and there was plenty of ice cream to share. To go with it, he had made waffles. All seven boys filled their plates and made themselves comfortable in the living room.

"Do you guys want to watch a movie?" Seokmin asked.

"Can we watch Treasure Planet?" Mingyu suggested. "Please?"

"Let the guests decide, don't be rude." Minghao flicked his forehead.

"Ignore them." Seungkwan turned to Wonwoo and Hansol. "Are you guys cool with Treasure Planet?"

"I've never watched it." Hansol said between spoonfuls of ice cream.

"You have to. It's the best animation movie of all times."

"Okay, so Treasure Planet it is!" Junhui volunteered to get up from the couch and set up the movie.

They all went silent when it started. Mingyu shed a tear in advance.

groupchat - lol fight

gemini has sent an attachment

gemini: look at all the cute

dad: how did they end up in this situation

gemini: we were watching a movie and those 3 were sitting on the floor but then hansol fell asleep on hao and kwannie fell asleep on hansol

memehao: i suffer

memehao: they are heavy my body is fragile i cant support their combined weight

dad: think positive at least theyre comfy

memehao: yeah but im not

seokmeme: ur body is anything but fragile

gemini has sent an attachment

gemini: more cute

dad: aw look at those babies

woozi: care to explain why wonwoo and mingyu fell asleep on each other when its not even noon

woozi: how are they tired

seokmeme: ice cream + a movie is a deadly combination

josh: aw this looks like fun

josh: i wish i could've joined you guys but i got invited out of the blue to play at an event in 2 days so i had to prepare some things :-/

gemini: its ok there will always be opportunities mingyu is always making too much food

josh: :D

seokmeme: guys update minghao fell asleep on me

seokmeme: i joined cuddle line on the floor and then hao leaned his head on my shoulder and bam hes out to dreamland

NAEGAHOSH: i cant handle all the cute,,, its Too Much

woozi: says the person who kisses everyone who joins our group


NAEGAHOSH: i am an affectionate friend

NAEGAHOSH: i see my friends and i just....... need to give them the Love and Support they deserve

gemini: you're such a sap

woozi: you're just as bad as he is junhui

gemini: no im not!!!!

woozi: do i have to remind you of our first showcase

gemini: no regrets

NAEGAHOSH: i just noticed something on the first photo

NAEGAHOSH: why is no one commenting on the fact that hansol is wearing weed socks

josh: he got them from his secret satan last Christmas

josh: you know secret santa but with bad/ironic presents

josh: he started to wear them ironically but at this point im starting to think he took a liking to them

woozi: im disappointed.

seokmeme: hey now dont sockshame the boy when hes not online to defend himself

Chapter Text

boo to hansolo

boo: hey

hansolo: o hi

hansolo: wassup

boo: nothing much

boo: i wanted to ask u something

hansolo: shoot

boo: a friend of mine is starring in a musical and got me two tickets

boo: wanna come with me?

boo: eh it might sound awkward bc we're not very ~~close~~ but you said you liked musicals so

hansolo: !!!!!! yes!!!

boo: oh

hansolo: it aint awkward dude you fell asleep on me that day we're now bonded for life

boo: lol sorry about that

hansolo: dont be

hansolo: that day was fun af and ice cream was bomb

hansolo: also mingyu was right treasure planet is an amazing movie

boo: i'll make sure to tell him that hes gonna love you forever

hansolo: everyone loves me

boo: everyone loves ME

boo: they like you bc ur new and adorable

hansolo: didnt junhui throw a pillow at you on multiple ocasions

boo: its tough love

boo: he would never hurt his favorite son

hansolo: pretty sure his favorite son is minghao

boo: theyre related so it doesnt count

hansolo: lmao

hansolo: oh wait so im "adorable"

boo: when did i say that

hansolo: scroll up

boo: that was my autocorrect

hansolo: okay boo sure

boo: did u just call me boo

hansolo: thats...... thats ur username....

boo: yea true its just that not many people call me that so i was Surprised

hansolo: oh so do you prefer kwan

hansolo: kwannie

boo: hm i like all of them so dont fret haha

hansolo: k

hansolo: so when is the musical

boo: next friday!! i think its at 7

hansolo: neat

hansolo: pls tell me its not a fancy-clothes type of outing

hansolo: because i only own basketball shorts and jeans and im too broke to buy fancy stuff

boo: oh no not fancy

boo: but uh wear jeans

boo: i dont wanna be seen with anyone wearing basketball shorts

hansolo: police hello im being bullied

boo: get rekt both u and ur terrible fashion sense


emo glinda to woozi

emo glinda: hey jihoon

woozi: hello

woozi: its past 3am so im assuming you're writing

emo glinda: you assumed right

emo glinda: also why are you awake tf

woozi: just like you, i thrive in the dead hours past midnight

woozi: so im composing

emo glinda: understandable

emo glinda: i have a question about our play

woozi: okay

emo glinda: are we going to cast the actors after the script is finished or do i have to write with the actors in mind

woozi: we dont usually think about this so idk

woozi: but 1st option is safer

emo glinda: yeah thats what i thought

emo glinda: one more thing

emo glinda: what about female characters? i mean we're 13 boys and while i love drag i dont want this to be like classical greek theatre

emo glinda: you know with only guys playing the characters

woozi: oh that

woozi: so theres this other group in the company

woozi: they're a group of 10, all girls

woozi: so we collab sometimes

emo glinda: oh awesome

woozi: yeah we need to introduce you and the other newbies to them

woozi: theyre a handful but theyre good souls

emo glinda: okay then i wont disturb your composing anymore

emo glinda: thank you jihoonie

woozi: call me that again and i'll block you


That morning, Soonyoung found Jihoon asleep on the living room's couch, headphones resting on his neck and laptop — probably out of battery now — open on the floor. He shook his head disapprovingly and attempted to wake the other boy up, so the latter could go to his actual bed and sleep a little more on a comfortable setting.

"Jihoon." he placed a hand on the other's shoulder and shook him lightly. "Jihoonie, wake up."

Jihoon just grumbled in response and swatted Soonyoung's hand away.

"Hey. You fell asleep while composing, you're on the couch." the older poked Jihoon's cheek. "This is not a good place to sleep in, you know."

"Leave me alone." Jihoon drawled that last syllabe, voice sleepy.

"Don't make me carry you to your bed. You know I can and you know I would."

The shorter boy buried his face on the cushion and flipped Soonyoung the bird.

"Okay, then. Don't complain about your spine when you wake up, I warned you."

Jihoon shifted a little before sitting up slowly, hair disheveled and eyes still closed. "Fine. I'm going."

"Take off the headphones first, Ji."

He groaned, annoyed, before doing so. "What time is it?"


"Wake me up before ten and you're bald. I mean it."

"Wouldn't dream of it." Soonyoung smiled.


10:30 found Soonyoung watching cartoons in the living room, bowl of cereal forgotten on top of the coffee table and sketchbook by his side. He heard footsteps coming from their hallway and turned his head to see Jihoon, still in pajamas and barefoot.

"Morning." the younger greeted. "Where are Cheol and Jeonghan?"

"It's a Tuesday, they're at work. And good morning, Ji. There are breakfast things on the kitchen table and I made coffee."

Jihoon made his way to the kitchen and came back with a cup of coffee and a plate with toast and cookies.

"Scoot over." he motioned to the couch. "You're taking up all the space."

Soonyoung moved to the side and put his sketchbook on the table. Jihoon made himself comfortable.

"What are you watching?"

"Steven Universe. It's awesome. Where did you find those cookies?"

"They're from my secret stash, I'm not telling you."

"That's mean." Soonyoung snatched a cookie from the plate and took a bite. "It tastes good."

"Yeah, that's why I hide them."

Soonyoung smiled and leaned his head on Jihoon's shoulder, to which the shorter scoffed.

"It's too early for this. I mean it."


"You invade my personal space and I'm the killjoy?"


"I can live with that."

Jihoon got up from the couch to grab his laptop and continue working on the songs for the showcase. Soonyoung followed suit and started practicing stage designs on his sketchbook.

It was a common thing, both of them working on different things at the same time, often asking the other for an opinion. Sometimes, Soonyoung would put on the headphones and listen to Jihoon's works a few times, and Jihoon would take control of the pencil and scribble things he considered important on Soonyoung's sketches. They were competent enough working solo, but were excellent working together.

In a few hours, Jeonghan and Seungcheol got back from work, only to find the TV still on and their housemates glued to the couch, immersed in their work.

"I can't believe you two." Jeonghan shook his head.

"We work our asses off to provide for this house and the dynamic duo doesn't even leave the couch?" Seungcheol crossed his arms. "Kwon Soonyoung, is that an empty bowl of cereal I see on the coffee table?"

Well, in that house, peace was always a little shortlived.


groupchat - lol fight

hansolo: a moment of your attention please

hansolo has sent an attachment

hansolo: gentlemen

hansolo: i would like to state that mr. hong jisoo is ready to strike a few strings and win some hearts

josh: vernon no

josh: look its nothing ok the event im playing at tonight has this punkish vibe and they asked if i could dress the part

seokmeme: dUDE

gemini: W O W

NAEGAHOSH: u look so good wth

memegyu: ive been Blessedt

josh: i blush

hansolo: he really is blushing lmao

angel: no offense but sign me the fuck up

woozi: jeonghan. manners

angel: sorry :(

angel: but this is a great look shua

josh: thanks :D

memehao: uh i saved the photo for studying purposes i hope you dont mind???

memehao: the outfit is really great i could use it as inspiration for my next assignment

josh: oh i dont mind!! thank you for the compliment!

memehao: im guessing you picked the clothes yourself?

josh: you guessed right

memehao: yeah you couldnt have asked hansol for help since he has the fashion sense of a slightly damaged cardboard box

memegyu: hello 911 i would like to report a SICK BURN

seokmeme: apply ice to the burn

hansolo: this is no way to treat your one and only fan i am wounded

josh: you know hes right vern

hansolo: betrayed by my own cousin

hansolo: my flesh and blood my bro

seokmeme: hansol says he cant act but he can be quite dramatic sometimes huh

memehao: did he just. got roasted by seokmin of all people


NAEGAHOSH: i am so proud

memegyu: we're corrupting seokmin

memehao: we are.

hansolo: i know seokmin is a good soul so his roast hurt a little less

memehao: are you implying im not a good soul

hansolo: yes?????

memegyu: is he wrong tho

memehao: of course???? im a nice person???

woozi: there are only 3 nice people in this chat

woozi: seokmin, chan and jisoo

woozi: the rest are just varying degrees of annoying and/or evil

memegyu: whos the most annoying

NAEGAHOSH: hes gonna say me

woozi: im glad you're aware of yourself

josh: i hate to interrupt the banter but im leaving now for my gig

josh: wish me luck please??

NAEGAHOSH: good luck dude get them boys

woozi: good luck! you'll do good

memehao: good luck josh

memegyu: as the kids say these days,,,, SLAY

seokmeme: good luck!!!!!!

gemini: good luck jisoo we're rooting for you!

josh: hansol just kissed my forehead for good luck so i guess thats my cue to leave

josh: thanks for the good wishes, i'll tell you how it went!

josh: bye~

Chapter Text

groupchat - the tea is piping hot

nayoung added dad and 6 others to the chat

nayoung: girls im adding svt's leader line and their four new members for a while so we can meet the new guys since we're probably gonna collab again for this year's showcase

nayoung: hi boys we are pristin

trashieyon: annyeong

pepe: siyeon stfu

nayoung: enough

nayoung: gals introduce yourselves briefly

nayoung: hey this is im nayoung, not 22 yet, pristin's leader and director

milkyung: hi im kim minkyung, 20 in a few days, actress!

thing 1: kang kyungwon, not 20 yet, actress, singer and smoothie master

thing 2: henlo this is kang yebin, not 19 yet, actress + rapper

thing 1: we're surprisingly not related

pepe: i am jung eunwoo, 19, singer and actress

fine china: the name's zhou jieqieong, 18, actress and dancer

bae: im bae sungyeon, 18, im a singer and i act sometimes

YEAHwon: kim yewon, 18, actress and sunshine deliver

trashiyeon: im park siyeon, not 17 yet, rapper, actress and resident prick

trashiyeon: seungcheol in case ur reading this....

trashiyeon: you're an idiot :^)

kylo ren: hello im kyla massie, not 16 yet, rapper, actress and singer sometimes!

hansolo: okay one of us is going to have to change

kylo ren: this chat isnt big enough for two star wars references

dad: boys introduce yourselves be nice

hansolo: im chwe hansol or vernon, 19, rapper

hansolo: and apparently kyla's father

kylo ren: yeah i killed you

milkyung: im still bitter about that

josh: im hong jisoo/joshua!! not 22 yet, im a singer + actor and hansol's cousin

dino: hi im lee chan, 18, actor and dancer :)

emo glinda: jeon wonwoo, 21, writer and actor

pepe: dude i know you

pepe: you were in mr lee's modern theatre class last semester right

emo glinda: yep

pepe: i took it as well

pepe: but i never said anything and sat on the back so u probably dont remember me

pepe: i saw you crying when we watched that bob wilson documentary

pepe: tbh same

emo glinda: im what the kids call Relatable

thing 1: mood = ruined

trashiyeon: welcome to pledis dudes

hansolo: thank

emo glinda: you're all so young,,, i feel ancient

pepe: lmao grandpa

trashiyeon: no thats seungcheol

josh: is siyeon bullying seungcheol a common ocurrence or

nayoung: it is

woozi: theyre step-siblings

josh: :0

dad: yeah we're very close

trashiyeon: unfortunately

dad: you love me

trashiyeon: i tolerate you

thing 2: uh you cried last year because he had to go to another city for his internship???

dad: i didnt know dat

trashiyeon: fuck you yebin dont ruin my reputation like that

dad: language

nayoung: language

trashiyeon: f

trashiyeon: u

bae: N


dino: nice save

fine china: i have a question why is soonyoung quiet

NAEGAHOSH: i dont have anything relevant to say

woozi: since when has that stopped you

thing 1: DAMN SON

pepe: i forgot how much i love jihoon

NAEGAHOSH: i am wounded

fine china: man down

trashiyeon: roasted to death

dad: did you notice all the nice people stopped texting

thing 1: kyla isnt nice

kylo ren: I AM NICE

milkyung: i wouldnt trust someone with kylo ren as their username just saying

kylo ren: ITS A PUN

hansolo: i will protect my child

kylo ren: thanj u father

thing 2: kylo kills han in the movie tho

trashiyeon: good job yebin now eunwoo is crying

nayoung: sungyeon jokingly asked who died and now shes crying even more

dino: poor eunwoo

dino: its ok you still have 3 movies and a half with han

pepe: i sob

YEAHwon: its ok to cry

josh: look on the bright side at least its a character and not a real person

pepe: tru

pepe: still sad

dad: boys i thhink this is our cue to leave

emo glinda: why would sad nerd talk be our cue to leave

dad: idk i just feel like we're intruding their chat

milkyung: its not like you DONT intrude our practice room right

woozi: but we shoukd really get going

hansolo: bye girls it was nice meeting u through text

josh: i look forward to meet you in person!!

thing 1: josh is so nice,,,, im blessed

dino: bye everyone!!

emo glinda: bye children

pepe: bye uncle

hansolo has left the chat

josh jas left the chat

dino has left the chat

emo glinda has left the chat

woozi: bye girls

woozi has left the chat

NAEGAHOSH: goodbye dudettes

NAEGAHOSH has left the chat

dad: bye angels and siyeon

dad has left the chat

trashiyeon: thank god


groupchat - lol fight

memehao has changed the chat's name to "yoon jeonghan in evil"

memehao has changed angel's name to "fucking asshole"

fucking asshole: what did i do

memehao: you know very well what you did

fucking asshole: help me remember

memehao: "minghao, can i borrow a jacket?"

memehao: "yes, of course, they're on the left side of my wardrobe, just be careful with the box underneath them"

memehao: two minutes later my box is discarded on the floor

memehao: he threw it

fucking asshole: how does that make me evil

memegyu: was it THE box???

memehao: it was

seokmeme: o shit

fucking asshole: will somebody please tell me what was on the box

memehao: vases and plates

memehao: theyre all broken

memehao: some were my mother's

memehao: you knwo. from CHINA

fucking asshole: ohmy god

fucking asshole: hao im so sorry i really am

fucking asshole: shit. i dont know what to say really how can i make it up for you

memehao: you cant???? unless you have super glue or something

memehao: i dont really care that much about some of them but my mother's vase was really important so yeah

seokmeme: i can buy super glue on my way home

memehao: thanks seok

fucking asshole: im really sorry minghao

memehao: just listen to me next time ok

fucking asshole: i promise <3

fucking asshole: why did you keep the vases and stuff?

memehao: they had interesting prints and colors i was going to use them as inspiration for some designs

fucking asshole: oh....

fucking asshole: you can still do it right

memehao: yeah it will be difficult but theyre still useful

fucking asshole: oh im glad

memegyu: hao do you want hugs

memehao: im upset not dying

seokmeme: yeah hes back to normal


emo glinda to woozi

emo glinda: jihoon

emo glinda: i think im done with the script

emo glinda: it needs to be polished and stuff and there will probably be some changes but overall its done

emo glinda: i read it out loud and calculated the time and its around 1 hour and 10 mins long

woozi: cool can you send it to me

emo glinda has sent an attachment

woozi: i'll read it and tell you what i think

woozi: i like it its a little cliche but not too much and i think we can make it work

woozi: the dialogue is really good and the plot is imteresting

woozi: but can i make a suggestion

emo glinda: go ahead you're the boss

woozi: make it gay

Chapter Text

hansolo to memehao

hansolo: dude

memehao: sup

hansolo: i need your help

hansolo: im going out and i need a nice outfit

memehao: i see

memehao: do you even own nice clothes

memehao: or does your wardrobe consist of hoodies only

hansolo: im honestly feeling so attacked right now

memehao: dead meme

memehao: but since im feeling nice today i'll help you

memehao: first of all where are you going

hansolo: theatre

hansolo: im going to watch a musical

memehao: oh what a coincidence seungkwan is going to see a musical as well

hansolo: hehe about that

memehao: wAIT A MINUTE

memehao: are you two going together??????????

hansolo: yea he had an extra ticket so he asked if i wanted to go w him


hansolo: nah dude chill its not a date

hansolo: just a friendly outing

memehao: oh ok two bros sitting in a theatre 5 feet apart cause theyre not gay

hansolo: hao pls

hansolo: are you going to help me or not

memehao: i am

hansolo: thank

memehao: do you have any black skinny jeans or smth

hansolo: nah only dark blue jeans and one acid wash

memehao: wear the acid wash jeans

memehao: a dark tshirt like black or navy blue

memehao: nothing too fancy

hansolo: i have a very cool neck deep tshirt its black i think it would look good

memehao: i dont know what neck deep is but i dont trust your judgement

hansolo: neck deep is a BAND you uncultured swine

memehao: i dont listen to your emo shit hansol

hansolo: rude

hansolo: but go on

memehao: do you have a leather jacket?

hansolo: nah i have a bomber jacket and jisoo has a trech coat i could borrow

memehao: nope no trench coats

memehao: so unless you want to come here and borrow something from me you're stuck with the bomber jacket

memehao: but do you want some friendly advice

hansolo: yea sure

memehao: seungkwan likes boys in band tees and leather jackets

memehao: he would literally swoon

hansolo: tf why are u telling me this

memehao: imagine i just sent a winking emoji

hansolo: hao. we are not going on a date

memehao: okay sure !

memehao: but are you wearing one of my jackets or what

memehao: i have a red one that would suit you just saying.......

hansolo: ...fine im coming


It was nearing 6pm when Hansol stood in front on Minghao's house and rang the bell. He heard a few muffled voices that were saying something along the lines of "hey, go get it", "no, I look gross, you go get it" and "do I really need to do everything in this house?". Moments later, the door opened, revealing a smiling Mingyu wearing an oversized Clockwork Orange t-shirt and grey shorts.

"Hi, Hansol! Minghao told me you were dropping by. Come in, come in."

Hansol stepped inside, hands in his pockets.

"I didn't peg you for a Stanley Kubrick type of guy." he said, motioning to the taller's shirt.

"I'm not." Mingyu smiled. "Junhui is, though. The t-shirt is his."

"So you all just steal each other's clothes?"

"Only when it's laundry day. On regular days we just ask if we can borrow them."

They both laughed at that. Hansol waved at Seokmin, who was watching TV in the living room, and followed Mingyu to Minghao's room. He knocked on the door.

"Who is it?" they heard Minghao's voice ask.

"It's me!" Mingyu answered in an exagerated sweet voice.

"Good to know. Go away."

"Hansol is here as well."

"Okay, I'm coming."

A sleepy-looking Minghao opened the door and motioned for Hansol to come in. The room was a little messy, as expected from a place shared by young adults. It had two twin-sized beds, one of which was currently being occupied by Junhui. The older boy was typing something on his laptop and waved at Hansol as a greeting, smiling at him.

"So", Minghao turned to him, analyzing his outfit. "I see my help was useful. Not bad, young grasshopper. Not bad." he nodded in approval.

"I'm a few months younger than you, don't call me 'young grasshopper'."

"Fine, fine." Minghao opened his closet, picking a red leather jacket from a hanger. "What do you think?"

Hansol tried on the jacket. It fit, it matched his other clothes and it was comfortable. "It's good. Thanks for letting me borrow it."

"No problem. Just give it back in one piece."

Hansol nodded and shrugged off the jacket, folding it carefully. "Hey, where's Seungkwan?"

Minghao held back a teasing smirk. Are they really trying to convince me this is not a date? "He's getting ready. Skincare routine or something."


"You two are going to the theatre from here, right?"

"Yeah, I guess. It would take too long to go back home and then go to the theatre."

"I figured. Make yourself at home while you wait for Seungkwan, there's strawberry milk in the fridge, and you can just search around the kitchen if you want to eat something because I never know where the snacks are so I can't tell you where to find them."


"I'll go back to the nap I was taking before Mingyu rudely interrupted me." Minghao motioned to his bed. "Have fun on your not-date, Hansolie."

The younger rolled his eyes and exited the room, choosing to watch TV with Seokmin while he waited for Seungkwan to finish whatever he was doing.

After a few minutes of watching a comedy movie and dealing with Seokmin tickling his sides for no reason ("it's affection", he explained later), Hansol heard a door slam and someone screaming "I'M LATE!". He turned to the corridor and saw Seungkwan with an exasperated look on his face, rushing to the door as if he was going out. Before he got to his goal, he noticed Hansol on the couch and let out a surprised "oh".

"Surprise!" the brunette said with little enthusiasm.

"What are you doing here?"

"Uh, Minghao let me borrow a jacket so I came here to get it. Going back home just to leave for the theatre again would waste my time, so I just stayed here."

"Okay, cool. So we're not late."

"No, we're on time. I think we need to leave in 15 minutes, though."

Seungkwan hummed affirmatively and joined the other two boys on the couch, sitting between them. He took his phone out from his back pocket and opened what appeared to be a colorful game — wait, was that Candy Crush?

(He was on level 53.)

Now that they weren't rushing to leave or anything, Hansol could pay attention to the blonde boy beside him. Seungkwan was wearing dark blue jeans, a white turtleneck and a pastel pink jacket over it. His lips were pink, his eyes were soft, his cheeks were full, his skin was glowing... and Hansol was getting a little carried away admiring the boy.

"Is there something on my face?"

Oh, shit.

"No, it's nothing." Hansol smiled awkwardly. "I was just, you know, spacing out."

"You do that a lot, don't you?"

"I do. Habit that I can't break."

"It's ok." Seungkwan poked the younger's forehead lightly. "It means you're creative."

On the other side of the couch, Seokmin rolled his eyes. "I can't believe I'm third-wheeling right now. Okay, I get it, you two are cute, but tone the PDA down, geez."

"Third-wheel is an expression used only when couples are involved." Seungkwan objected.

"And we're not a couple." Hansol added.

"Could have fooled me." the older smiled. "You even finish each other's sentences."

"Why is everyone picking on us today?"

"Relax, I'm just playing." Seokmin ruffled his best friend's hair.


Mingyu joined them on the living room after that, but before he could sit down on the floor (there was no space left on the couch) Seungkwan grabbed his sleeve.

"Gyu, can you drive us to the theatre?"

"Is it far?"

"Not really. We just don't want to take the bus." he looked up with puppy-dog eyes. "Please?"

The taller sighed. "You guys take advantage of my softness. Okay, I can drive you there. Just tell me when we're leaving."

Hansol and Seungkwan celebrated with a double high-five and hugged Mingyu.

A few minutes after that, they decided to leave. Mingyu grabbed the car keys and Seungkwan opened the door.

"After you." he motioned to Hansol.

"No, no, after you." the brunette protested.

"I insist, after you."

"Excuse me." Mingyu interrupted them, pushing through and getting out the door. "After me."


The musical was nice. Seungkwan's friend did an amazing job playing the villain and the protagonist had a very good development throughout the two acts. The songs were incredible as well and Hansol found himself humming to the tune of the last song after they left the theatre.

"So", Seungkwan turned to the younger. "How was it?"

"Awesome. Really. I'm glad you invited me to watch this."

"I'm glad you accepted my invitation. You're a pretty cool person to hang out with."

"I could say the same to you."

They sat at a bench just outside the building and Seungkwan rested his head on Hansol's shoulder. "How are you going back to your house?"

"I'll probably take the bus."

"Do you want me to ask Mingyu to drive you? It would be safer and faster."

"I don't want to be a burden. I mean, I already stayed at your house for a while before we came here and-"

"Nonsense! Mingyu wouldn't mind, really. He's very kind and helpful."

"Okay, then. But if he looks tired or anything, I'm taking the bus."

"Sure, Sol."

Hansol froze at the nickname. Seungkwan, after realizing what he had said, blushed a little and started apologizing for "calling him something before asking if he was comfortable with it".

"It's ok, Seungkwan." he touched the other boy's arm. "You just took me by surprise. No one's ever called me that before. But I like it."

"Oh, good. I wouldn't want to make a new friend uncomfortable because I can't control my words."

"I'm pretty sure I can't get uncomfortable around you, though. You're such a happy presence."

The blonde boy blushed at that and tried to hide it with a cough. "I-I should call our personal driver. I don't want either of us to get home late."

"Ok. Cool."

20 minutes later Mingyu arrived, and it was enough to clear the awkward atmosphere between the two boys. The car ride to the campus (where Hansol lived) was full of singing along to what was playing on the radio, bad jokes, a particularly funny drunk story and Seungkwan pinching Mingyu's cheeks non-stop.

When they got to Hansol's apartment block on campus, they said goobye to each other, Hansol thanked both of them and left the car. When he reached the door, he gave one more wave before entering the building.

Back on the road, Mingyu shot Seungkwan a knowing glance, eyebrows raised and smirk playing on his lips.

"What?" the blonde asked, even though he knew what kind of topic was coming up.

"So... you two, huh?"

The younger rolled his eyes. "Agh, not you too."

Chapter Text

groupchat - yoon jeonghan is evil

memehao has changed the group's name to yoon jeonghan is old

memehao has changed fucking asshole's name to angle

memehao: he is forgiven

angle: thank you bubu

memehao: call me bubu again and i'll rethink my previous actions

angle: sorry

memegyu has changed memehao's name to baby boy

baby boy: W H Y

memegyu: idk you just are

baby boy: i fucking hate you

seokmeme: ok but now we have to match

seokmeme has changed memegyu's name to tall boy

seokmeme has changed their own name to smiley boy

smiley boy: all done

baby boy: why do you two get okay usernames while im stuck with baby boy

baby boy has changed tall boy's name to annoying boy

baby boy has changed smiley boy's name to loud boy

baby boy: justice.

emo glinda: my dudes

emo glinda: sorry to interrupt the banter but i have good news

loud boy: spill

emo glinda: after late night confabulations with boss #2 (jihoon), the official script is finally finished

annoying boy: YAY

loud boy: YAY

angle: YAY


angle: wait who is boss #1

emo glinda: seungcheol

NAEGAHOSH: oh am i boss #3????

emo glinda: no you're the houseplant

NAEGAHOSH: i am Wounded

NAEGAHOSH: i take you under my wing and give you nothing but love and support and kisses

NAEGAHOSH: for you to do this

emo glinda: <3

NAEGAHOSH: keep ur hearts im hurt

woozi: let soonyoung be a baby and send everyone else the script pls thank you

emo glinda: will do

emo glinda has sent a file

annoying boy: brb gonna read this

loud boy: same

NAEGAHOSH: reading time, begin!


groupchat - yoon jeonghan is old

loud boy: this play is so gay i love it

emo glinda: thank jihoon for that

emo glinda: it was going to be a straight endgame but jihoon said "make it gay"

emo glinda: i was scared of making it gay bc we dont know if there will be AssholesTM watching it but like

emo glinda: opportunity of a lifetime right

annoying boy: i think i might have a crush on hyejun

annoying boy: can i be eunjeong pls

baby boy: congratulations mingyu you have a crush on a faceless character

annoying boy: but his pERSONALITY

gemini: no i want to be eunjeong

annoying boy: you were the protagonist on all of our other plays let me have the spotligh this time

baby boy: junhui can be the villain

gemini: only if hao gets to play my sidekick

loud boy: but jiyoung doesnt have a sidekick

gemini: shit

gemini: minghao can be hyejun then

baby boy: okay first of all im not an actor

annoying boy: you are tho

baby boy: shut up let me finish

baby boy: second of all id rather die than be mingyus romantic interest

woozi: are you forgetting who chooses the actors

annoying boy: sorry boss

woozi: also we ARE going to meet up to decide this so dont go thinking this discussion will happen over chat bc it wont

gemini: and our fun was ruined thanks jihoonie

woozi: we are THIS close to becoming a group of 12


It took a while to figure out a day and a time when it was possible for everyone to meet up at the company due to their different schedules, but they were finally there. They were in luck, because one of the small auditoriums was vacant for the rest of the day, so they were allowed to use it for as much time as they needed.

All thirteen boys were sitting on the chairs, leaving the stage empty. Some were enrolled in parallel conversations and some were scrolling through their phones until Jihoon called everyone's attention with a loud "hey!".

"Shall we start?"

Eveyone nodded, script in hand.

"Before we decide the roles", Seungcheol started. "We should do a summary of the story together, just to make sure everyone has the basics memorized. I'll start. The three protagonists are the twins Kang Hyojin and Hyejun, plus Hyojin's best friend Park Eunjeong."

"Hyejun thinks Eunjeong has a crush on his sister and is a little overprotective, but aside from that he is a really cool guy." Hansol added.

"Eunjeong, on the other hand, thinks Hyejun is an asshole." Seokmin continued. "I don't really blame him."

"The story is set on an universe where some people have powers, but they're not superheroes. For whatever reason." Chan said. "Hyojin has mind-reading powers."

"Hyejun doesn't have any powers." Junhui added. "Even though they're twins."

"He does have a solid right hook, though." Mingyu interrupted.


"Stop defending you fictional boyfriend, Mingyu." Minghao flicked the taller's forehead. "Anyways, another person who has a power is the villain, Jo Jiyoung. He has superhuman intelligence."

"So, there are some weird things happening and the protagonists decide to find out why." Seungkwan continued.

"And they have the help of the Jung brothers, Woojin and Iseul, their neighbours." Jisoo said.

"Don't forget Moon Jimin, she helps them too." Jeonghan reminded. "And she has time-manipulation powers."

"And in the end, they all figure out the mistery, Jiyoung vanishes and Hyejun and Eunjeong are hella gay for each other." Soonyoung finished. "Hyojin remains a strong independent woman who doesn't need a love interest to be happy. The end."

"I think they summed it up pretty well." Wonwoo turned to Jihoon. "What about you?"

"Yeah." the shorter agreed. "I can't believe you guys almost forgot Jimin. She's my favorite character."

"So" Seungcheol clasped his hands together. "Are we doing this?"

"Hell yeah."


By the end of the day, almost all of the roles were covered. Junhui agreed to step out of his comfort zone by playing the villain, leaving Eunjeong to be played by Mingyu. Chan and Seokmin were going to play the Jung brothers. Seungkwan, Jisoo and Jeonghan were going to be the three remaining characters that hadn't been mentioned before: Jimin's best friend, Jiyoung's lost brother (with cure powers) and the detective that helps the protagonists, respectively.

The only characters left were the two girls and Hyejun.

"I can contact the Pristin girls to see if two of them can help us." Soonyoung suggested. "But Hyejun..."

"I'm not doing it." Minghao shook his head. "My acting isn't good enough."

"I can't play Hyejun either." Jihoon said. "I'm still working on the songs, and I'd rather help direct the play."

"I'll do it."

All heads turned to Wonwoo, the source of the voice.

"You sure?" Jihoon asked.

"Yeah. I mean, I wrote him. I know the character well enough."

"Okay then. Just making sure you're not being peer pressured to do it."

"I'm not." he put a hand over his chest dramatically. "It's out of kindness of my heart."

The group laughed. Then, they dispersed to do their own things — the actors started reading some scenes together to test dynamics, Hansol went to the technician booth on the mezanine to get familiar with the illumination system, Jihoon opened his laptop and put on his headphones and Minghao started some basic sketches.

After a while, Jihoon stood up with his laptop, took out the headphones and called:

"Hey, dancers." Soonyoung, Junhui, Chan and Minghao turned to him. "Come with me. Your song is finished."


dad to nayoung

dad: hey

nayoung: hi how are you? and the boys?

dad: evrything fine

dad: we need help

dad: i mean its more like a collab

nayoung: you need female actors dont you

dad: ye

nayoung: we'll be glad to help

nayoung: how many

dad: two

nayoung: that's too little

nayoung: i need more girls

dad: thats gay

nayoung: im gay

dad: same

dad: but are you going to help us

nayoung: sure can you send me the script

dad has sent a file

dad: enjoy your reading

nayoung: i will

nayoung: i'll get back at you with an update

dad: k

dad: see ya l8r

nayoung: i dream of the day when you will start texting properly

Chapter Text

NAEGAHOSH added gemini and 2 others to the chat

NAEGAHOSH has named the chat "performance team"

baby boy: great another groupchat

NAEGAHOSH: henlo boys and welcome to the perf team groupchat

NAEGAHOSH: so we can talk about our part of the showcase yay

dino: hello everyone!!!!!

baby boy: was a new chat really necessary?

NAEGAHOSH: yes shut up hao

baby boy: excuse you

gemini: as the oldest its my duty to stop you two children

gemini: so please stop

NAEGAHOSH: im only five days younger than you

gemini: still younger

baby boy: sorry mom i will keep quiet

gemini: this is why minghao is my favorite

dino: isnt it because you're cousins??

gemini: that too

NAEGAHOSH: so. serious talk??

NAEGAHOSH: what did u think of the song

baby boy: lit

dino: awesome

gemini: great

NAEGAHOSH: yea i agree jihoon never disappoints

gemini: lmao whipped


NAEGAHOSH: so, just like all of our previous original songs, it has a test-drive phase in which we can add/change lyrics or another parts of the song and stuff

NAEGAHOSH: and when its finally done we record it with our very own voices

NAEGAHOSH: and then its coreographing time!!!!!

dino: oh so we need to sing?

NAEGAHOSH: only if u want to

gemini: yea dont feel pressured

dino: okay

baby boy: you all know very well that i dont sing

gemini: shut up hao your voice is gorgeous

baby boy: no

dino: ive never heard your singing voice but im sure its nice

NAEGAHOSH: a beautiful cinnamon roll, too good for this world, too pure

gemini has sent an audio file

gemini: this is minghao singing in the shower i recorded it yesterday

baby boy: wHAT THE FCUK

baby boy: junhui my beloved cousin have you ever heard of the terms "respect" and "privacy"??? just a thought

gemini: we are ignoring the main point which is you have the voice of an angel

baby boy: an angel with a sore throat maybe

dino: your voice really is good, minghao

dino: dont be too hard on yourself

NAEGAHOSH: 3 against one you lost

NAEGAHOSH: your argument is now invalid

baby boy: im this close to leaving the chat

dino: pls dont

baby boy: loud sigh

gemini: did you just type out "loud sigh"

baby boy: do you have a problem with that

NAEGAHOSH: children pls

baby boy: even louder sigh

NAEGAHOSH: im just going to ignore this shit

NAEGAHOSH: are yall fine with the song

baby boy: yea but i have a few lyrics i think would fit??maybe

NAEGAHOSH: hit us up

baby boy has sent a file

NAEGAHOSH: neat i think we can add this i'll talk to jihoon

baby boy: cool

NAEGAHOSH: later we can meet up @ his studio later to record the song

NAEGAHOSH: "later" as in a few days obv

dino: neato

baby boy: please never use that word again


dad added annoying boy and two others to the chat

dad has named the chat "rap dudes"

emo glinda has changed the chat's name to "hip hop team"

emo glinda: i refuse to be in a group called rap dudes

dad: i am hurt

dad: but dis is a good name so ur forgiven

hansolo: so why are we here

dad: glad u asked my boy

hansolo: you're only three years older than me.

dad: my boy

dad: so our song isnt finished yet

dad: but jihoonie said since our team is basically all lyricists we should write the lyrics before he starts composing the song fr

annoying boy: im not a lyricist tho :((

dad: shush ive seen your writing its not bad

annoying boy: yeah but it isnt good either

hansolo: there will be no insecurities in this chat

hansolo: kim mingyu listen to me

hansolo: you are a talented person im sure your lyrics are Good Shit and even if they werent your voice is beautiful so they would sound heavenly

hansolo: and i got a little bit carried away im sorr

emo glinda: i agree

emo glinda: i will fight anyone who gets even close to dissing you

annoying boy: but what if im dissing myself tho

emo glinda: i'll fight you

annoying boy: thank u guys

annoying boy: for caring

annoying boy: ily

dad: that was such a pure exchange of words........

dad: so, kids

annoying boy: we're not your kids but go on

dad: this gc is for our shenanigans so if u hav lyrics u can send them to the chat

hansolo: roger that

dad: for now i will log out so bye

annoying boy: bye honorary father


woozi has added angle and three others to the chat

woozi has named the chat "vocal team"

woozi: listen here you little shits

woozi: and joshua

josh: :)

woozi: i havent finished our song yet BUT we're like halfway there so i created a group so we can decide when to meet up and record the song ok

loud boy: cool

boo: is it a ballad

woozi: yes

angle: amazing

josh: i love it already

woozi: josh would you like to record the guitar parts and play it live??

josh: yes i would love to!!!!!!

angle: hong jisoo, the Purest,

loud boy: ikr

josh: i blush

boo: and i roll my eyes so intensely i can see my brain

boo: not bc of you, josh

boo: you're the best

boo: im just perpetually rolling my eyes at everything jeonghan says

angle: thats no way to treat your favorite father

boo: my favorite father is jihoon

woozi: i am slightly creeped out but thanks

woozi: you're my favorite son as well

boo: <3

angle: but seriously what did i do

boo: you're cheesy

boo: its too much

boo: even tho i agree with you

loud boy: makes no sense but okay

woozi: go to sleep seungkwan

boo: its 4 pm

woozi: go to sleep seungkwan

Chapter Text

groupchat - performance team

NAEGAHOSH: my dudes

NAEGAHOSH: how do yall feel abt a recording session on monday

NAEGAHOSH: hao and jun i know you two dont have work

dino: neither do i


gemini: hao and i are available

NAEGAHOSH: sensational

baby boy: why are you so happy

baby boy: its like dawn

gemini: its literally noon

baby boy: its dawn....... somewhere in the world

NAEGAHOSH: im happy because i am a happy person

NAEGAHOSH: unlike you

NAEGAHOSH: you say jihoon is a cactus but ur just as prickly

baby boy: i mean i never said i wasnt

gemini: ignore him he just woke up he's cranky

baby boy: your ass is cranky

gemini: see

dino: hao do you want chocolate

baby boy: is that bribery

dino: no its called caring for my cranky friend

dino: i can come over w chocolate and also bring videogames

baby boy: now THATS bribery

dino: yeah it is

baby boy: consider myself bribed im a slut for chocolate and videogames

baby boy: a hypothetical slut but still

NAEGAHOSH: so everyone ready for monday

baby boy: wait what should i be ready for

gemini: oh my god


On Monday, the four boys met up at the company's building, in front of the door to Studio 2A. Jihoon was probably already inside, as it was pretty much his second home. The studio rooms belonged to the company, but the members of the groups could borrow it whenever (if it was available, of course). Needless to say, Jihoon's name was on the borrowing book a lot. A lot.

Soonyoung knocked on the door. "Ji? It's us!"

Shuffling sounds and footsteps could be heard on the other side of the door before it was opened, revealing a tired-looking Jihoon, in his sweatpants-and-jumper glory, featuring Prada eyebags and messy hair.

"Hey." he waved. "Come in."

"I'd say good afternoon, but I'm going to skip the greetings just this once." Junhui narrowed his eyes and held Jihoon's face with both hands. "When was the last time you slept?"

The shorter shrugged. "I don't know."

"Are you eating, at least?" Minghao asked.

Jihoon pointed to the boxes of takeout piled on a table.

"So the answer is 'yes, but not properly'."

"Look, I need to get things done, alright? We don't have much time to do everything we need to do."

"We have plenty of time." Chan said. "You should take care of yourself, you know, health first, work stuff second."

"Preach." Minghao raised both arms.

Jihoon crossed his arms with a hmpf! and sat on the spinning office chair in front of the computer screen.

"We can talk about this later. Are you guys ready? Are the lyrics okay, everything?"

Three out of the four nodded. Chan had his eyes fixated on a spot on the floor, looking insecure.

"Chan." Soonyoung put a hand on the youngest's shoulder. "Your singing is great, we've practiced it, remember? No need to worry, you're going to do fine."

Chan smiled at the older, patting the hand that was resting on his shoulder. "Thanks, Soon." he turned to Jihoon. "I'm ready too."

Jihoon rolled his chair to the area in front of the recording booth, where another computer stood. "So, who's gonna go first?"

Minghao walked to the booth, claiming he was not scared of anything, not even recording a song. During the chorus, he added an adlib that wasn't on the plans, but fit really well. Jihoon smiled at that.

Soon enough, his part was finished.

"You're done!" Jihoon said into the mic. "Thanks for the adlib, Hao. It suited the song."

The other boy ducked his head, a little embarassed, before leaving the booth.

Soonyoung was next. His part went smoothly, and the rest of the boys couldn't help but notice the way he moved along as he sang. They were small body movements, fluid motions with his arms and shoulders in a way he was dancing, yes, but his focus was on singing. The others wondered if it was councious or if he was so connected to the beat it just flowed through his body.

Junhui occupied the booth after Soonyoung left. He sang the same line as Soonyoung but on a different verse, and it was originally a falsetto, but he chose to sing on a lower register. Jihoon stopped the recording.

"Why did you lower your voice?" the shorter asked. "It sounded good, don't get me wrong, but do you think you can try singing this part in the original pitch? If you can't, we'll keep it this way, don't worry."

"I don't think I can reach the notes, my voice doesn't have a wide range."

Soonyoung took control of mic for a moment, pushing Jihoon aside. "Shut up, Junhui, you sound like God's favorite tenor and you know it."

Junhui blushed at the compliment. "Okay, I'll try."

He tried, and he did it perfectly. All jaws in the room fell.

When he was finished and left the booth, Jihoon kicked him on the shin. "Don't underestimate yourself ever again, you fucker."

"Sorry sir!" Junhui mock-saluted the shorter. "Won't happen again, sir!"

The last one to record his lines was Chan. He was still nervous, yes, but most of it had died down. He focused on his lines and reaching all the notes, and didn't have much trouble during the recording.

"Alright", Jihoon drummed his fingers on the table. "I'd say that's a wrap but we still have that breakdown part with no lyrics."

Soonyoung lifted his hand. "I have a suggestion."

"I'm slightly scared, but go on."

"Give Channie a rap verse for the breakdown."

Jihoon pondered. It wasn't a bad idea at all. He turned to the maknae.

"What do you think about that, Chan? Do you want a little spotlight during that part?"

"Yeah, I guess." the boy shrugged. "It'd be cool. But we don't have the lyrics yet, do we?"

"Actually..." Soonyoung clasped his hands together. "Remember Minghao's lyrics? The ones he sent on oir groupchat?"

"Oh!" Minghao nodded. "Yeah, they could be a rap."

"Awesome. Do you think you can do this, Chan?"


They spent a little more time on the studio than planned because of the impromptu idea for the breakdown. When Jihoon finally declared that they were finished with the recording, everyone was tired and dying to get some rest. However, when Minghao, Junhui and Chan got up to leave, Soonyoung didn't join them.

"Go on." he told them. "I'll stay a little bit more. Leader stuff. I'll talk to you guys later, ok?"

They said goodbye to the two remaining on the studio and closed the door. Then, Soonyoung turned to Jihoon with a worried expression.

"You're not spending another night in this studio. You're coming home with me."

Jihoon averted his eyes. "Don't tell me what to do. Do your own work, let me do mine."

"Come on, we all said it, this isn't good for you. We'd rather have you healthy and well-rested than finish everything on time, you know."

"You're just as bad as I am! You stay locked up in our practice room, dancing until early in the morning, you don't eat and you only shower because dancing makes you sweaty and gross."

"That's different."

"It's not!"

"I'm trying to take better care of myself. I don't see you doing the same."

"Look, I'm fine, ok? I've been doing this since forever. I'll survive."

Soonyoung huffed. "Come here." he opened his arms.

"This is not a hug-appropriate conversation."


The younger shook his head.

"Just let me hug you, you idiot. I fucking missed you."

Jihoon rolled his eyes, but wrapped his arms around Soonyoung, who hugged back.

"I haven't been here for that long."

"Enough for me to miss you. And for everyone else to miss you as well."

"I hate it when you get all protective-best-friend over me."

"Yeah, I love you too." Soonyoung pressed his cheek to the shorter's head. "Promise you'll try to change your habits."

Jihoon sighed. His breath tickled Soonyoung's neck. "I promise."

They pulled apart, but Soonyoung still held the younger at an arm's length. "You're still coming home with me."

That made Jihoon gron in frustration, but he complied anyways. Soonyoung was very persuasive. The pout on his lips had something to do with that, or whatever.

They called a cab, and it wasn't long until Jihoon fell asleep on Soonyoung's shoulder. The older looked at him fondly, and damned the moment he had to wake him up to get out of the car.

When they entered the house, Jihoon made a beeline for the couch, but Soonyoung stopped him.

"Nuh-uh, remember the last time you fell asleep there? You're going to bed to get a good night of sleep." he pushed the half-asleep boy by the shoulders, directing him to the room he shared with Seungcheol.

Speaking of Seungcheol, he wasn't asleep yet — it wasn't that late. The lamp on his nightstand was on, illuminating the pages of the book he was reading. He greeted his two friends, letting out a scoff as Jihoon fell on the opposite bed like a sack of potatoes.

He watched Soonyoung tuck the other in with all the care in the world and a blushing face. He also didn't miss the delicate kiss the dancer placed on Jihoon's forehead. He shot him a knowing look.

"Shut up." Soonyoung mombled.


Jihoon woke up at 7:23am. Seungcheol's bed was empty — he was probably getting ready for work.

Jihoon felt rested, but not enough. The last thing he remembered from the other night was a pair of soft lips on his forehead.

Weird, he thought. Probably a dream.

He turned to the other side and went back to sleep.