"I don't want to be with him anymore.. I just.. don't know how to tell him without breaking his heart.." Dean said as he sat on the couch and sipped his beer.
"Dean.. how long have you been feeling this way?" Cas, their best friend of three years, asked as he turned his full attention to Dean.
"I don't know.. a month or two.. it doesn't really matter because... I am basically stuck with him. This feeling isn't going to go away, Cas, it just isn't.." Dean said as he chugged his beer and stood up to get another one. Cas sighed softly as he looked at Dean, his gaze turned towards Sam, who was behind Dean. "Dean.." Cas began to say before Dean cut him off.
"Cas.. I have tried everything okay? I tried pushing him away but it isn't helping, fuck, I've even cut off sex in hopes of Sam just leaving me alone but it doesn't work Cas!" Dean yelled, making Sam flinch back, Sam bit his lip as he stayed in his spot, frozen.
"Dean.." Cas tried again, seeing Sam hurt upon hearing Dean's confession.
"No Cas! I don't want to be with Sam anymore! I just... I don't want him anymore.. I just want to go back to having one night stands and not worry about anniversaries or girly crap like that.." Dean said as he rubbed his face, he turned around and finally saw Sam on the verge of tears.
the chapters will be short. I apologize.. constructive criticism is appreciated!
"So uhm... I found out I'm a carrier Dean.." His voice quivered softly. "And uhm.. I uh.. I'm pregnant.." Sam said softly, so hurt and so broken, making Dean want to hug him and make the pain go away but he restrained himself. "Wait.. you're pregnant?" Dean asked with a frown. There was no way he was the father, the last time he touched Sam that way was about two months ago. Dean frowned some more and then chuckled lightly. "Wait.. is this your pathetic attempt of keeping me tied down to you?" Dean asked bitterly. "Because I'm telling you one thing Sam, I meant what I said, I don't want to be with you anymore and if you think a kid is going to change that, boy are you wrong. I don't want you or that kid. I don't want kids. wait.. no, I want kids, I just don't want you fathering them."
"Dean!" Cas yelled at Dean, ready to rip him a new one but Sam stopped him. "Cas.. it's.. it's okay." He said as he smiled lightly at Cas and then looked at Dean, he swallowed the lump in his throat, taking Dean's words in. "It isn't a pathetic way to keep you tied down, Dean. I just.. I found out today, and I was coming home to.." Dean cut him off. "To what Sam? To surprise me? Did you really think I was going to leap joy?To say, hey man, yes! We're gonna be daddies!" He mocked bitterly as he glared at Sam. "You aren't special Sam." He snarled angrily. "You might have been Yellow Eyes' special king boy, but you aren't special, you're far from special." He said as he glared at him. "Get rid of that abomination.." He pointed to Sam's stomach and then looked at him, dead in the eyes. "Or get out of my life.. for good." He said as he walked away from Sam, bumping into his shoulder, to make his message more clear.
Sam stumbled a bit when Dean bumped into him. "Sam.. he.. He didn't mean any of that, it just took him by surprise. Give him some time to let it all sink in, okay?" Cas said, trying to comfort Sam as best as he could. Sam wiped the tears he didn't notice he was shedding as he looked at Cas. "No, Cas.. He.. He meant it.." He said as he shook his head. "I'm so stupid.." He mumbled as he made his way to what used to be his and Dean's shared room. He began to pack a bag, making sure to only take his valuables and some clothes. "Just keep him out of trouble, okay Cas?" Sam told Cas as he zipped his bag and looked at Cas, who nodded. "You know I will." Cas said as he offered him a soft smile. Sam took a deep breath as he looked at the room one last time and walked out of Dean's life for good..
chapter is up.. not my best one, i apologize.. hopefully this clears up why Dean is such a jerk. as always, constructive criticism is appreciated!
Dean was at the local bar, shooting back his fifth shot when he saw Cas come towards him. "Did he leave?" Dean asked. Cas nodded. "Yeah, he did.. couple minutes ago. You can still catch him and apologise." Cas told him, earning a bitter laugh from Dean. "Apologise? Cas, I'm free! No more Sam." He said as he grinned. "No more worrying if I missed an anniversary or if I have to go back home to Sam pestering me for sex." He said as he shot back his sixth shot. Cas sighed softly as he looked at Dean. "Dean.. what's really going on?" He asked as he cut him off, taking Dean by the arm and took him out of the bar. "Nothing is wrong." Dean said as he followed Cas. "Sam chose that thing over me, just like always." He said as he leaned against the impala. Cas frowned. "What did you expect him to do? Get rid of your child?"
Dean got up in Cas' face. "That thing isn't mine!" He yelled bitterly. "How can you say that!?" Cas yelled back as he glared at Dean, shoving him. "Because Cas! When have the Winchesters ever had good luck when it came to family?! Who's to say that that thing won't be the antichrist or something?! I mean.. Our mom was killed because of our luck.. Sam was Yellow Eyes' Golden boy for crying out loud!" Dean yelled as he leaned against the impala. "God knows what the hell that thing is or what it can do.. Sam should just get rid of it instead of hoping for the best."
Cas looked at Dean. "Dean.. what is wrong? Come on, I'm your best friend, talk to me.." He pleaded. Dean looked at Cas. "Cas.. I screwed up Sam, so bad, he thinks he is in love with me.. What makes me so sure that I won't fuck up things with this thing? That that thing won't lust after me or I won't lust after it? I mean.. Sam lusted after me because of the way I raised him.. and look what that got him.. a single parent because his brother didn't want to man up and do the right thing.. which.. I have no clue what it is anymore.." He said as he opened the door and got in. "Dean.. come on.. you need to tell Sam how you feel.." Cas said softly as he approached the car "I can't Cas.. this isn't just about me and Sam anymore.. besides.. He made his choice. He chose to leave me." Dean said, angering Cas. "He left because you gave him no choice!" Cas yelled. "He left because you practically kicked him out! What did you expect him to do?! Okay Dean, let me get rid of our child and let's go back to being brothers because you can't stand me?!" He yelled as he glared at Dean.
Dean got out of the car and punched Cas. "Damn right that's what he should have done! I at least deserve that! I have done nothing but look after him and he couldn't do this one thing for me?!" He yelled back as he kept throwing punches at Cas. "Shows how grateful that ungrateful asshole is!" He yelled as he kicked Cas' ribs. Cas got up and tackled Dean to the floor. "How dare you ask him to get rid of your child! How dare you ask Sam to commit the sickest of sins there is!" Cas yelled as he glared at Dean. Dean glared back at Cas. "Because I don't want my kid to have demon blood running thru its veins! Because I want my kid to be normal not some psychic freak! I don't want my kid to be like Sam with weird powers or like Missouri who sees the future! Or worse.. a fucking witch!" Dean yelled as he shoved Cas off of him and stood up on his feet. "Its so fucked up in so many ways but god.. Cas, I hate psychics and witches.. what if that thing is one of them or worse!" He said as he rubbed his face. "I just.. I really hope that thing is dead before its born.."
Cas looked at Dean, shocked. "Dean.. you don't mean that.. Can you imagine the pain your brother will be in if he were to lose that child?" Dean scoffed as he shook his head. "Stop calling it a child! It's a monster!" Cas scoffed. "No Dean.. you're the monster here.. not that innocent child.." He said and walked away from Dean, leaving him alone in the lot of the bar.
Dean rubbed his face once more before going back into the bar and got himself drunk.
Sorry for the wait.. As always, constructive criticism is appreciated!
After Sam had left Dean, or rather, after Dean had dumped him aside, Sam decided to settle down in San Diego, Cali. He had wanted to go back to Palo Alto but went against it for various reasons, one of them including his late college girlfriend, Jess. It had been hard for Sam to deal with his pregnancy alone, especially when he heard AJ's heartbeat for the first time, how he wished Dean was there, or when she kicked for the first time. Sam couldn't count on his hands anymore how many times he cried himself to sleep, how many times he wanted to pick up the phone and call his brother. He wanted Dean to be by his side every milestone during his pregnancy, but Dean didn't want him or their child, he made that very clear.
During his seventh month of pregnancy, Sam managed to get a job at the public library as a librarian. It wasn't his ideal job but it got bills paid, he also managed to go back to college, this time to get a degree in teaching. He even made a new friend, Charlie, who offered him a place to stay while he got back on his feet. Life was somewhat okay for Sam, that was until he went into labor during his eighth month of his pregnancy. Sam was thankful that Charlie was with him every step of the way, but after 12 hours of pain, Alyssa Joy Winchester was born, he wished Dean was by his side, sharing the joy of welcoming their child into the world. That night, Sam spoke to his daughter about her other daddy, making whatever excuse came to mind for his absence. He wanted to call up Dean to let him know about their daughter'arrival but he chickened out various times.
Two years later..
Sam unblucked his baby daughter from the car seat and place her down next to him "Alright AJ, ready to go shopping with daddy?" He asked his daughter as he looked at her and booped her nose, making AJ giggle, "yay!" she exclaimed as she bounced her feet while Sam pushed the cart inside the store after locking his car. "Alright AJ, where to first? Meats or dairy?" AJ furrowed her brows in concentration as she pointed to the milk aisle. "Milk!" She exclaimed as she clapped her hands, making Sam chuckle as he pushed the cart to the milk section, holding AJ's hand as he walked with her through the store, placing their items inside their cart.
Dean was driving through California for a hunt, he pulled into the supermarket to stock up on road food, he usually stocked up at the nearest gas station but he was good on gas and the market was closer. He parked and stepped out, making his way inside. He grabbed a basket and began to fill it up with snacks, from chips to soda. He was about to check out when a soft whimper caught his attention, he looked through the aisles until he found a small baby girl. "Hey there cutie.." He said cautiously as to not scare the baby girl, AJ looked up at the stranger, rubbing her eyes as she pouted, "are you lost?" The man asked as he approached her, he crouched to her level, when the baby girl whimpered again, Dean couldn't help but picked her up. "Alright, let's go find your momma." He said as he rubbed her back in a soothing way. AJ sucked on her thumb as she looked around the store for her daddy with the man.
Sam was frantically looking for AJ, panic plastered all over his face as he kept looking. He turned his back for one second to ask the grocer a question, apparently that was enough for AJ to run off. "AJ?!" He called out, ignoring the stares from the other parents. "AJ! Where are you?" He called out as he kept going aisle through aisle. God, what kind of parent was he if he couldn't keep AJ safe? If he couldn't keep an eye on her? No wonder Dean dropped his ass, it was a miracle Dean had kept his ass for so long. Sam shook the thoughts out of his head, now wasn't the time to think about Dean.. Sam was on the verge of tears when he heard his baby girl, "daddy!" she exclaimed as she wiggled out of the man's arms and ran towards Sam, Sam ran towards her, grabbing her and hugged her tightly. "Don't ever do that again, AJ." He told her as he gave her a soft squeeze, kissing the top of her head. "Sowwy.." She said softly, hiding her head in his neck.
Sam sighed a sigh of relief and then looked towards the stranger to thank them, only to have the words caught in his throat when he saw his ex lover in front of him. Dean had watched the interaction between the baby girl and his brother, he couldn't believe his eyes. He looked between his brother and the little girl, taking in her features, she had big eyes like Sam's but they were green like his, she had freckles on her cheeks and had Dean's nose. Realization hit him like a ton of bricks, the baby girl was his daughter.. He gaped like a fish, no words coming out. "Thanks.. for um.. thanks for helping her find me.." Sam said softly after the shock wore off briefly, Dean had barely heard the words. Sam looked at Dean, wanting to say more, but he went against it. Sam gave his brother a soft smile, as he walked away from him, keep a solid grip on AJ.
Dean's shock wore off after he watched his brother walk away from him. "Wait.. Sammy!" He called out as he walked towards his brother, he instantly regretted using Sam's nickname when he saw Sam's bitch face. "Its Sam.." Sam said coldly. Ouch.. okay, maybe Dean deserved the cold shoulder from Sam and more. "Right.. sorry.." Dean said as he cleared his throat. "Uhm.. is.. she's beautiful.." Dean said as he pointed at AJ. Sam looked at Dean and then at AJ. "Thanks.." He said as he placed her in the cart seat. "What's her name? I heard AJ but I mean.. what does it stand for?" Dean asked as he rubbed the back of his neck nervously. Sam scoffed as he shook his head, he pushed the cart towards the cashier lane. "What do you care?" He asked coldly as he began to put the items on the belt, Dean flinched slightly. "Okay.. you're mad.." He said as he looked at Sam. "But come on Sammy.. I'm her other father, I deserve to know her name."
Sam laughed bitterly as he shook his head. He looked at Dean, "Its Sam and you have no idea how mad I am. As for knowing her full name, you lost that privilege the second you told me to get rid of her." He said through his teeth. Dean rubbed his face as he placed his items on the belt too. "Sam.. come on, I just.." He sighed softly as he got a paper and pen, writing down his number and handed it to Sam. "I'm in town for a couple days. I want to get to know my daughter.. please call me.. If not for me.. at least do it for her. She has a right to know her other father.." Dean said as he shoved the paper into Sam's front pocket when Sam wouldn't take it. Sam shook his head. "She knows plenty.." He mumbled to himself as Dean paid for his and Sam's items.
Sam pushed the cart out to his car after thanking Dean for the groceries. "Sam.." Dean called out as he caught up with them again. Sam looked at Dean, as he unlocked his car. "What?" He asked as he grabbed AJ and placed her in her car seat, buckling her up and began to load the bags into the back. Dean looked at his brother, taking in his beauty. AJ may have Dean's eyes and freckles but she got her beauty from Sam. "What do you mean she knows plenty?" Dean asked as he looked at his daughter. Sam closed the back door and then slid the door closed on AJ's side. "It means she knows you bailed on her because of her other father, you got nothing against her, only against me because I forced you into something you never wanted." Sam said as he looked at Dean and then gave him a tight smile. "Don't worry Dean, you aren't the bad guy in this story, I am." He said as he got inside his car. "I'll call you around 7 after my shift is over." Sam said, not giving Dean a chance to say something.
Dean sighed softly as he watched his brother drive off. Sam really hated his guts, and he didn't blame him one bit but.. that wasn't going to stop him from trying to make it up to him. He wanted to be in his daughter's life and if making up with Sam was something that was going to allow him to do that, he'd do it.
sorry the long delay! I'll have the other chapter posted as soon as I'm done editing. Constructive criticism is always welcomed. :)
Sam placed the bags inside the house, he sent his daughter to her room while he got her snack ready. He placed the groceries away and then called Cas. "Hello?" Cas answered after hearing his phone ring. "Hey Cas.., it's me, Sam." Sam said as he took some apples and began to slice them up after putting Cas on speaker. "Hey Sam, how's it going?" The mutual friend asked as he cleared his throat. "Dean found us.. did.. did you tell him where I was located?" Sam asked as he kept slicing more fruit and placing them in a bowl. "Uh.. define telling him... I gave him a hunt near where you lived but I didn't think he would find you." Cas said softly. "Cas.. he saw her.. and now.. now he wants to be in her life like if he hadn't asked me to get rid of her 2 years ago.." Sam said as he rubbed his face after finishing slicing up the fruit. "I understand you're still in pain but Sam, Dean is her father, as much of a jerk that he was, he is your brother and ex lover, he deserves a chance to get to know his daughter, just like AJ deserves to know who her other father is.." Cas advised, hoping Sam would take it without a fight.
Sam groaned. "I know he does and I know she does too but what if he hurts her Cas? What if his intentions aren't true?" He asked, panicking a bit. Cas detected the panic in Sam's voice, "Sam? Take a few deep breathes for me please. You're going to give yourself a panic attack." He said as calmly as he could. Sam nodded even though Cas couldn't see him, he took 3 deep breathes and then exhaled softly. "What do I do Cas?" He asked, "I don't want him in her life if he is just going to hurt her.." Cas understood where Sam was coming from, Dean had been the biggest jerk to him, "What if you spoke to him first? Before he meets your little girl formally? Get to know his true intentions and.. maybe talk about what went wrong in your relationship, fix things if you guys can." He advised.
Sam chuckled lightly. "Cas... There is no fixing things. He just wants to be around for her.. I am okay with that so.. I'll talk to him, I'll see if his heart is in the right place.." He said softly, "As for fixing things.. I don't think we can fix what he damaged so badly Cas.." He said sadly. "Maybe you guys can, give him a chance to explain why he was so cruel.. I know it won't change anything Sam, but it may give you the closure you need to be able to finally move on.." Cas said softly, "Maybe you guys can try again, for the sake of your daughter.."
Sam shook his head. "No Cas, I'm not going to give my daughter and myself false hopes.. I can't get trap Dean in something he never wanted in the first place just so that my daughter can have her fake perfect family. I can't hurt her like that if things don't work out between Dean and me." Cas sighed softly. "Sam, you gotta try.." "No Cas.. I am not trying anything.. look, I'll talk to Dean, see why he wants to be in her life after 2 years and that's it. I'll keep you updated with anything. Okay? Bye Cas.." Sam said as he disconnected the call. He took a deep breath and then took the fruit bowl up to AJ's room.
When 7 rolled around, Sam was sitting on his couch, staring at the number on the paper. He had phoned Charlie earlier to take AJ with her for a couple of hours while he spoke to Dean alone. He fidgeted with the paper before dialing Dean's number. "Go for Dean." Dean answered after a few rings. "Its Sam.." Sam said when he heard his brother's voice. Dean smiled softly when he heard Sam's voice. "Hey Sammy, I'm glad you called." Dean said, "can I come over and see her?"
"Call me Sammy one more time Dean and I swear I'll scratch Baby up." He growled and then cleared his throat to calm down a bit. "Anyway.. I was hoping we could talk first.." Sam said as he scratched his neck. "Talk? About what? Sam, I just want to see my daughter not get back together. I'm sorry I gave you that impression, kiddo." Dean said with a soft chuckle. Sam frowned. "Kiddo? Really?" He said as he shook his head. "I don't want to talk about us.. I mean, I do but not because I wanna get back together, 'cause I don't. I'd hate for you to feel so trapped in something you never wanted." Sam said a bit harsh than he had intended to. Dean flinched at Sam's words. "Sam, That's not...." Sam's dry chuckle cut him off. "That's not how you felt Dean? Is that what you're gonna say?" Sam said angry as he got off his couch, holding his phone to his ear as he paced the floor angrily. Dean rubbed his face, maybe talking isn't such a bad idea. "Okay Sam.. I get you're angry.. so let's talk." He said, "Should I meet you somewhere or go to your house?" Sam laughed dryly. "Angry doesn't even begin to explain how I feel." He said and then bit his lip as he looked around his house. If they were going to talk, it would be better if they did it indoors and in private rather than with an audience. "My house.." Sam said, "Got paper and pen to write down the address?" Dean nodded as he said yes and wrote down the address his brother gave him. "I'll be there in 20 mins." Dean said, his brother nodding on the other line and disconnected the call, grabbing his jacket and keys, making his way to the house.
as always, constructive criticism is always welcomed. :)
Once Dean arrived at Sam's place, he made his way to the door and knocked. Sam opened the door and moved to the side to let Dean in, Dean made his way inside, shrugging off his jacket as he hung it on what he assumed was a coat hanger. "Nice place you got here Sammy." Dean said as he looked around, he saw AJ's timeline of photos on a wall. He groaned when Sam punched his shoulder. "It's Sam." Sam said with a glare. "Right.. Sam.." Dean said as he rubbed his shoulder, walking into the living room with Sam. "Want some water or soda?" Sam asked as he went to the kitchen. "Water is fine" Dean said as he stood in front of a picture featuring a dimple smiling Sam holding a tooth grinning baby AJ.
Sam gave Dean a water bottle and then cleared his throat. "So.. you wanna explain why you were such a jerk to me or why the sudden change of heart?" Sam asked in a harsh tone as he looked at his brother. Dean took a big sip of his water and then set it down on the small coffee table. He rubbed his hands together as he looked at Sam, "First of all Sam.. I am so sorry I was such a jerk to you.. You didn't deserve that from me.." Dean began to say. "It's just.. you gotta understand Sammy.. Sam.." He quickly corrected when he saw Sam's clenched fist ready to strike. "Understand what Dean? That you didn't love me anymore? That you felt so trapped in our relationship that instead of coming to talk to me about it, you said so many horrible things behind my back to Cas?!" Sam yelled, keeping his voice as steady as he could. He was still hurting and talking wasn't helping him at all.
Dean could see that Sam was hurting, he wanted to hug his brother but decided against it, knowing Sam wouldn't take the gesture kindly. "I handled it wrong Sam, believe me.. Cas never let me forget it once since you've been gone.." "Good." Sam said as he kept glaring at Dean. Dean sighed as he took a seat on the couch, he rubbed his face, holding his forehead with his hands leaning on his knees. "Look Sam.. the reason why I felt so trapped and why I was such a jerk to you is because.. I never wanted to be in a relationship with you.." He said softly, Sam almost missed the confession. Sam frowned as he looked at his brother, confusion rose at him. "I'm sorry.. did you just say you never wanted to date me?" He asked, making sure he understood Dean correctly.
Dean nodded. "No. I didn't.." He said as he looked at Sam. Sam looked at his brother shocked, his face morphed into guilt. "Then why did you say yes?!" Sam asked angrily as his glare grew. "Because you kept asking me! You wouldn't leave me alone ever since we got really drunk and I kissed you.. You thought I wanted you that way because of the kiss, and well.. I couldn't say no to you.." Dean said as he fidgeted with his water bottle. Sam scoffed as he shook his head, he stood up as he ran a hand through his hair. "So, you never wanted me that way.." He said as he shook his head. "What about when we were intimate? All those iloveyous.. all those compliments you gave me..?" Sam asked as he looked back at his brother.
Dean sighed as he looked up at his brother, "I never once lied about loving you Sam, I mean.. yeah, I love you as a brother Sam.. but that's it.. nothing more, nothing less.." He said as he looked away from Sam. "As for the compliments.. I pretended you were my ex boyfriend.." He said softly. Sam frowned confused. "You're what?" Dean took a deep breath, exhaling as he looked at Sam. "I was dating someone else while I was with you.. every time I was in bed with you, I pretend I was in bed with him.." Sam looked at Dean, he swallowed softly as his eyes teared up. "Wow.." He said softly as he rubbed his mouth, he wiped his eyes as he chuckled dryly. "That's.." He couldn't form words as he paced the floor. "Sam.. I'm so sorry.." Dean said as he stood up and looked at his brother pacing.
Sam shook his head, he sniffled softly as he avoided eye contact with Dean. He felt so stupid for thinking Dean ever wanted him that way. "What made you want to be in her life?" Sam asked hoarsely. Dean looked at Sam, he hated seeing his brother so hurt. He wanted to wrap him in his arms and make things better but he couldn't. He was the reason why Sam was in so much pain. "She's my daughter Sam.." He began to say, he flinched when Sam slapped his hand down on the coffee table, almost breaking it. "No Dean! She's mine! You never wanted her or me!" He yelled gravelly. "Whoa! Hey! It was you I never wanted, Sam!" Dean yelled, quickly regretting the words when he saw Sam's tears. "Sam.. I didn't.." Sam wiped his tears as he shook his head. "No, it's.." It's what? Okay? No, this was never going to be okay.. Sam thought to himself. "Why do you want her now? Where were you 2 years ago?" Sam asked as he tried to compose himself.
Dean scratched his neck. "I tried looking for you, Cas didn't want to help me.. He kept telling me that this was something I needed to fix on my own." Dean said. "So, I began searching for you, I asked every hunter out there, no one knew where you were." He said as he sighed. "I know I missed 2 years of her life, time that I will never get back but Sam, come on.. I am here now, I want to be in her life. Dad was never there for us and that's a shitty excuse but.. please.. please let me be in her life.." Dean begged his brother as he looked at him, noticing that Sam wouldn't look at him. Sam cleared his throat. "Why should I? What makes me so sure you won't hurt her?"
"Sam, if I wanted to hurt her, I would have the second I knew she was mine back that grocery store." Dean said as he chuckled lightly, trying to lighten up the mood. He saw that he failed and cleared his throat. "Look, I get that you don't trust me so how about you supervise my visits until you can trust me?" Sam nodded softly. "Yeah, okay.." He said, wanting to end Dean's visit already. He just wanted to go to his bed and cry himself to sleep. Dean smiled big. "Great. Can I see her now?" Dean asked as he looked around the house for her. "Um.. do you think you can wait until tomorrow?" Sam asked as he looked at his brother briefly. Dean's smile flattened. "Why tomorrow?" "Because she is with Charlie tonight.." Sam said as he crossed his arms. "Okay, can't you call this Charlie guy and have him bring her over?" Dean asked with a frown.
Sam sighed as he glared at Dean. "Charlie is a girl and no, she can't bring her over now." He said angrily. "You want to see her? Come back tomorrow at 9am." Sam said as he began to shove Dean out the door with his jacket. "I've had a long day and I need to lay down so.. goodnight Dean." Sam said, about to close the door in Dean's face but Dean held it open with his hand. "Sam.." Dean said softly, Sam looked at Dean, his eyes watery. "I'll call you tomorrow Dean.." Sam brittle softly, closing the door when Dean let his hand fall. Sam slid down the door after he closed it, hugging his knees as he cried.
Beta'd by hoody1077, thank you!
The next morning, Sam was sitting at the table with Charlie, sipping coffee as he waited on her opinion on the events of the last two days. Charlie looked at Sam with a frown. "Okay.. So, you and Dean date for six months, he cheats on you, is upset over the pregnancy and now he wants to be let into her life? And on top of that, he claims to have never wanted this with you?" She asked as she scoffed. "Hell no," She answered before Sam got a chance to, slamming her hand down on the table, making Sam flinch a bit. "He can't just waltz in here and pretend to make everything okay. He can't be trusted with her," she said as she got up and got more coffee.
Sam sighed softly as he rubbed his face. "I know it all seems so wrong but.. I'm doing this for AJ. Trust me, if I hadn't gotten pregnant, me and Dean? Wouldn't have spoken to each other at all," he said as he scratched the back of his head. "Besides, before everything went south, Dean was a good guy. He was my best friend.. I want AJ to meet that side of her father."
Charlie groaned as she sat back down, looking at Sam with a soft expression. "Sam, I get it, you want him to be a part of her life in hopes of starting things up again but sweetie, you're only hurting yourself," she said softly.
Sam shook his head as he chuckled. "No Charlie, that's not what I want. Maybe I did before but...that was before, I have come to terms to the fact that Dean and I will probably never happen."
Charlie gave him a soft smile. "Are you sure about that?" She asked sincerely.
Sam nodded. "I am. I always thought Dean was afraid of all of this being too real for him, I kept imagining that he would want me back, want us back but...Charlie, he told me he never loved me. I have to move on, I got my unanswered questions answered last night," he said with a sigh. "It's time for me to start all over, get back out there. I may finally call Alfie, he seems like a good guy for me, right?"
Charlie giggled softly as she nodded. "Yeah, Alfie may be good for you. What about Gabriel or Kevin?" She suggested as she got up.
Suddenly, a knocking noise as heard, and Charlie swiftly got up to answer the front door as Sam waited at the table.
Dean smiled at the redhead in front of him, shifting a bit to get comfortable before asking, "Hi, is Sammy home?"
Charlie looked at Dean from head to toe and glared at him. "Who's asking?" She asked as she blocked his view to the house.
Dean chuckled lightly and then gave her his flirty smile. "I'm Dean,” he stated while grinning.
Charlie scoffed as she shook her head. "Sam, it's Dean." She said, turning to go the kitchen, leaving the door open for Dean.
Dean chuckled nervously as he stepped inside and looked at Sam. "Hey Sammy…” he greeted as Sam handed Dean a cup of coffee.
"Hey, AJ will be up soon." Sam said as he made his way upstairs to check up on her.
Charlie kept glaring at Dean, watching him sip his coffee nervously. "So..." Dean said as he looked at her.
Charlie walked over to Dean, still glaring heavily as she stopped right before hitting him. "Sam and AJ hold a special place in my heart, hurt them in any shape or form and I will personally end you." She threatened through her teeth and walked away from him to go to AJ's room.
Dean silently swallowed the lump in his throat and rubbed his forehead. "Yep...she's scary as hell..." he mumbled to himself as he waited for Sam and AJ.
Dean and AJ meet each other. Slowly, Dean is seeing how big of a jerk he was to Sam while pregnant with AJ.
Happy New Year!
Sam looked at AJ as he finished getting her all dressed up for the day. "Are you ready to start your day, baby?" He cooed as he tickled her, AJ squealed as she giggled.
"Dada!" She squealed as she giggled, trying to get her dad to stop tickling her. Once she managed to get away from her dad's tickle session, she ran out of her room and ran downstairs.
Sam laughed as he began to chase her, he gave a soft rawr, making AJ squeal as she ran towards Charlie. "Chacha!" She giggled as Charlie picked her up and tried to hide her from Sam.
Sam pretended not to see AJ with Charlie, "where is AJ?" He asked thoughtfully as he tapped his chin with crossed arms. He looked around, playfully looking for his baby girl.
Dean looked at the scene in front of him from the living room, he felt so out of place. Guilt began to creep into him, he shouldn't have pushed Sam out of his life, he missed so much of his daughter's life. Now here he was, feeling like a complete stranger. "You're good with her.." Dean said, reminding Sam of his presence.
Sam cleared his throat as he grabbed his daughter from Charlie, "thanks.." Sam said as he looked at Dean, balancing AJ on his hip. AJ looked at the man and then at her dad, she leaned her head on his shoulder as she sucked her thumb.
Charlie looked between Sam and Dean, as much as she wanted to stay and show her support for her friend but she knew better than to intervene without being asked. "I'll see you tomorrow, SamSam." She said as she smiled at Sam, giving him a kiss goodbye on the cheek and a few tickles to AJ before sending a warning glare to Dean as she exited the house.
Dean chuckled lightly. "She.. uhm.. she's scary." He said to break the tension that surrounded the house all of a sudden. He rubbed his neck nervously as he looked at Sam and at AJ.
Sam chuckled softly. "No, not really." He said as he cleared his throat. "So uhm.." He said walked to the living room with AJ. "Dean, this is AJ." He introduced AJ to Dean as he placed her on the ground gently.
AJ looked at the man and then hid behind her dad's legs. "AJ, this is Dean, you're other father.." Sam said as he looked at his daughter and then at Dean.
Dean looked at the shy little girl and smiled at her. "Hi." He said as he knelt in front of her. "You can call me dad, if its okay with your daddy," he said, looking at Sam and then at AJ, "or De." He smiled softly.
AJ looked at her dad, getting a confirmed nod and then at the man, frowning. "Dada?" She asked softly. She has never seen this man in her life, how could he be her dad?
Sam sat down on the sofa and brought AJ onto his lap, he looked over at Dean and signaled him to sit on the other side of the sofa. Once Dean took a seat, Sam looked at AJ. "You may not understand what I'm about to tell you but, try to. Okay?" Sam told his daughter, who nodded.
Dean looked at AJ and then at Sam, "Are you sure we should tell her?" He asked as he looked at Sam and then at AJ, "she's too young.."
Sam shook his head. "You want to be part of her life? This is how. She doesn't know who you are. Up until today, she didn't know she had another father, besides me, I'm explaining this to her. She may be young, but she understands some things." He said as he looked at Dean and then at AJ.
AJ looked at the man and then at her dad, waiting for the story as she sucked her thumb again.
Sam took a deep breath and then began to tell AJ the story of her life. "It all began about 2, almost 3 years ago, your dad and i were together, you see, we uhm.. we loved each other very much.." He said softly, feeling himself tear up. "But uhm.. things were a bit rocky before you arrived. Your dad and i no longer wanted to be with each other, we both wanted different things. So before you came along, we weren't together anymore, i made sure to stay away from your dad, until two days ago, your dad found us and asked to be in your life.."
"And here i am.." Dean said with a soft smile as he looked at Sam, he couldn't believe what he had just heard. What happened between them wasn't Sam's fault and yet, here was Sam, taking fault for it. Dean looked at his brother for a bit, he truly didn't deserve a second chance with his daughter.
Sam looked at Dean and smiled lightly at him and then looked at his baby girl. "So now, Dean wants to make up for lost time." He said as he smiled at AJ.
AJ looked at her dad and then at Dean. She didn't feel too comfortable calling Dean dad right away, it wouldn't be fair to her other dada. She bit her lip as she withdrew her thumb from her mouth and looked at Dean. "De.. no dada.."
Dean swallowed the lump in his throat when he heard AJ. Half of him was hoping that AJ would call him dad but.. She didn't want to, he didn't blame her. Dean smiled at his daughter. "That's okay, De is fine by me."
AJ smiled big as she looked at De and her dad. "Yay!" She clapped her hands, making Sam and Dean laugh softly.
"So, should we take little miss AJ out to breakfast?" Dean asked as he looked at AJ and then at Sam as he stood up from the couch.
"We can go out to eat." Sam said as he stood up with his daughter. "Let me just get her shoes on and myself ready." He said as he placed AJ on the couch.
"I can put her shoes on, if its okay with you, while you get ready." Dean suggested as he looked at Sam.
Sam nodded. "Sure, thanks, her shoes are in her closet, first door to your right." Sam said as he took Dean to AJ's room and then left to get ready to head out.
Playful banter between Sam and Dean. Dean reveals another reason for searching for Sam.
Dean shook his head rapidly when he saw Sam's Honda Accord after he stepped out of Sam's house with AJ. "Nope, i am not driving that." He said with AJ on his hip and then walked to his impala.
Sam frowned as he locked the door to his apartment. "Seriously? Your car doesn't have a carseat so therefore we are taking my car." He said as he unlocked it. "Unless you want a car seat in your precious impala." He challenged with a soft smirk.
Dean scoffed as he shook his head lightly and looked at AJ. "How about we let little miss AJ decide." He said as he tickled her a bit, making AJ giggle. "What car do you wanna take? Your daddy's yucky one?" He asked making a yuck face while pointing at Sam's car. "Or my awesome, badass car?" He asked as he pointed to his impala.
AJ furrowed her brows in concentration as she looked at both cars, sticking out her car in the corner of her mouth. Dean chuckled softly at her thinking expression. "She has your concentration face, Sammy" he said as he booped her nose, making AJ smile.
Sam rolled his eyes in a duh form. "That's because she takes after me, her dad." He said matter of fact, making Dean playfully gasp. "Oh my god, are you her dad? I never would have guessed!" Dean teased, making Sam laugh as Sam playfully shoved Dean's face.
Dean smiled big when he heard Sam's laugh, he was glad that he could still make Sam laugh. "Never thought I'd hear you laugh for me again, Sammy." Dean said as he looked at Sam, smirking softly when he saw Sam trying to hide his blush.
Sam cursed himself as he let his bangs try to hide his blush. "Yeah well, don't get used to it." He said as he cleared his throat and took AJ from him, AJ looked up at her dad, "daddy? De's car.." She said with a big grin, "alright baby, just gotta get your car seat. Okay?" Sam said as he carried AJ to his car and grabbed the carseat, taking it to Dean with a soft pout.
Dean grinned triumphly when he heard AJ. "That's my girl." He said proudly and then began to buckle up the car seat. He then let settled AJ into the seat, buckled her up and closed the door and got into the driver's seat.
Sam rolled his eyes as he got in the back seat, next to AJ, making Dean frown. "What are you doing? Get in the front." Dean said, patting the passenger seat.
Sam shook his head, "uh.. no thanks, i'm okay right here." He said as he buckled up and then smiled softly at him. "Dean, I'm fine, really." He assured when Dean wouldn't stop looking at him, which made Sam feel butterflies in his stomach and that is the last thing he wanted. Sam couldn't go back to having feels for Dean, especially when the guy made it perfectly clear that he didn't want anything to do with him.
Dean looked at Sam, he didn't like the idea of Sam being in the back, especially when Sam's seat was always next to him, in the front. "Come on, i promise i won't bite, unless you want me to." He winked playfully.
Sam laughed, hiding his blush as he shook his head. "You couldn't handle me riding shotgun anyway." He flirted playfully making Dean laugh.
"Oh I most definitely remember that I could." Dean flirted back, he enjoyed the playful banter they had going on. "Come on Sammy, i promise we won't make AJ an older sibling." He winked, making Sam gasp dramatically.
"Dean! She's sitting right here!" He said as he laughed. "Anyway, please just drive."
Dean shook his head. "Not until you get in the front." he said firmly. "Please?"
Sam rolled his eyes fondly as he climbed over to the front seat, ignoring dean's protests to watch the seat. Dean grinned triumphantly and drove off to the nearest denny's in silence. Sam had to admit, he had missed riding the impala next to Dean. He smiled at his brother and then looked out the window.
Once they Arrived, Sam got out and stretched his legs and arms. "Completely forgot that your car was made for short people" he joked.
Dean flipped him off as he got AJ from the back. "Alright, let's eat some food!" He said, AJ giggling, "yay food!" She clapped her hands while they entered the restaurant.
Once they were seated and they ordered their food, Dean looked over at Sam. "So.. there's another reason as to why I wanted to find you."
Sam looked at Dean, confusion. "What is it?" He asked, he couldn't help but be nervous and a bit scared.
Dean fiddled with the straw and then cleared his throat. "I um.. I'm seeing benny.." He said as he looked at Sam, waiting to see his reaction.
Sam looked at Dean, feeling his heart tighten up, he wanted to throw up and run away from the table. "That.. wow." He said with a dry chuckle. "Um.. why do you need to tell me this?" He asked confused.
"Well, um.. you see.." Dean said as he rubbed his face. "It's serious with benny... and well, I um.. I want you to be my best man.." He said as he rubbed his chin, looking at Sam.
Sam smiled tightly at Dean and then rubbed his face as well. "Can I think about it?" He asked as he turned his attention to AJ, who was sitting at the end of the table in the high chair.
"Uh.. yeah, of course." Dean said. "Wedding is in about three months.." He said as he smiled softly at him.
Sam gave him a quick smile and then played with his daughter to keep himself distracted. He couldn't believe it.. Dean was getting married.. He couldn't freaking believe it..