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The Magnificent 7 Idiots

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 Taehyung: soulmate #1

Jungkook: golden boy

Jimin: soulmate #2

Yoongi: eat sleep repeat

Hoseok: the only hope

Jin: mom of the year

Namjoon: daddy long legs


 

 The Magnificent 7 Idiots 

soulmate #1: who misses me

soulmate #1: which one of you fuckers left me on read

soulmate #1: its been 10 minutes i honestly feel heartbroken nobody misses me

soulmate #2: I MISS YOU TAE SORRY I WAS PRACTICING

soulmate #1: MY SOULMATE I MISS YOU TOO FUJK

the only hope: yoons and i miss you too taebae

soulmate #1: i miss you guys too but why didn't yoongi hyung text it himself

daddy long legs: he, along with jin, had too much to drink last night and they both passed out in hoseoks bed and almost 12 hours later neither have woken up or moved

daddy long legs: miss you tho tae when are you coming back

soulmate #1: oh mygod rip yoongi hyung and jin hyung they had a good life

soulmate #1: i come back tmr i just wanted to make sure you all missed me terribly

soulmate #1: i got a tan you'll all be pleased to hear

golden boy: pics or it didn't happen

soulmate #2: isn't it funny how kookie speaks up now when we're talking about tae :))

soulmate #1: jimin sweetie stfu :))))

soulmate #1: but here ya go kook

soulmate #1:

mom of the year: LOOK AT MY GORGEOUS TANNED SON WOW

the only hope: how are you awake wtf

mom of the year: i wake up for the good shit obviously hoseok jesus

mom of the year: let me love my son in peace

soulmate #1: thanks mom <333

mom of the year: anytime honey but momma's gotta go rest the killer headache that's about to hit

mom of the year: also, hoseok id change your sheets when you get home after showing the freshmans around uni, yoongi woke up and threw up everywhere

golden boy: so that's why you showed up in the chat not to see taes selfie

golden boy: which looks great btw hyung you look good with the tan!

soulmate #2: WOW ARE MY EYES REALLY WITNESSING THIS

soulmate #2: i love taekook

mom of the year: you're not the only one

soulmate #1: jimin, my sweet beloved soulmate, light of my life, if you don't stop this right now i stg wait till i come back tmr :))))))

soulmate #1: thanks tho kookie i appreciate it a lot (((':

soulmate #2: coughsTAEKOOKcoughs

soulmate #1: JIMIN

the only hope: ok but does nobody care that yoons literally puked on my bed

eat sleep repeat: ill buy you new sheets don't worry

eat sleep repeat: also whens the taekook ship gonna officially sail cause im ready to tag along on the honeymoon

soulmate #2: ahahaHAHAHAHAHAHA

soulmate #1 has left the chat


 

The Magnificent 7 Idiots

 

daddy long legs added soulmate #1 to the chat

daddy long legs made soulmate #1 an admin

soulmate #1: fuk namjoonie hyung have i ever said how much i love you

soulmate #1: you always look out for me

soulmate #1: i feel so lobed rn i could alskodt crylu

the only hope: is taehyung ok he usually isn't this loving to anybody but jimin

soulmate #2: and jungkook

soulmate #2: but yeah he's fine we were facetiming earlier and he's just missing us a lot and is already stressed for missing the first two days of this semester

eat sleep repeat: still doesn't explain why hes typing like that

soulmate #2: well i told him not to worry about it and to have a drink or two and apparently he had more than two

mom of the year: aw tae honey don't stress, your parents and you are having a wonderful vacation together so don't worry about school we'll all get through it together <3

soulmate #1: FUCK JIN HYUNNF I LOVE YOU SO MUCH ABD EVERYBODY ELSD I LOVWS YOU TOO

golden boy: we love you too hyung go to bed and rest

golden boy: text me when you arrive tmr ill come to the airport to pick you up

soulmate #1: ok kookie ;)

soulmate #2: did tae just wink at jungkook woWOWOW

golden boy: he's drunk jimin don't make fun of him

golden boy: it was probably meant to be a smiley

soulmate #2:  [screenshot captured]

golden boy: srsly

soulmate #2: yes srsly it still happened and ill be damned if i don't have proof

the only hope: jiminie send that screenshot to me i want to add it into my taekook folder

mom of the year: me too i want to add it to my receipts of this chat

soulmate #2: i got you guys dont worry

daddy long legs: you all are terrible

mom of the year: dont act innocent namjoon im onto you

daddy long legs: wtf hyung

eat sleep repeat: i showed jin your search history on your laptop last week

daddy long legs: you what

soulmate #2: whats happening oh my god

the only hope: SPILL THE TEA YOONGI

eat sleep repeat: last week, when students were still moving back to the dorms and namjoon was staying with hoseok and i while jin hyung was still at home

eat sleep repeat: well i woke up in the middle of the night and walked into the living room and namjoons asleep on the couch with his laptop and headphones sitting on his lap

eat sleep repeat: and the laptop was open

eat sleep repeat: and me being the nosy bitch i am, i looked at what he'd been doing

eat sleep repeat: and oh boy

the only hope: FUCK YOONS WHY AM I JUST HEARING ABOUT THIS NOW

eat sleep repeat: namjoonie here was looking on some... interesting sites

golden boy: porn sites

soulmate #2: you come back at the strangest times kook

daddy long legs: guys lets not do this pls

eat sleep repeat: namjoon here was looking up 'daddy treats his baby boy after a long day'

eat sleep repeat: so i took a picture of it and sent it to jin

mom of the year: why do you guys think i came back to the dorms two days early

soulmate #2: HOLY FUCKING SHIT

soulmate #2: NAMJOON HYUNG

golden boy: IM FUCKING SCREAMING 

the only hope: DADDY KINK DADDY KINK DADDY KINK

daddy long legs: i truly hate you all

 


 

The Magnificent 7 Idiots

 

soulmate #1: i just landed kookie where are you my bags are heavy af

soulmate #1: oh wrong chat

soulmate #1: wait

soulmate #1: NAMJOON

soulmate #1: oh myofos im yrlling in the airport

soulmate #1: shit hyung i didn't think you had it in you to have a kink like that

soulmate #1: i knew i gave you the best name in the chat hyung

soulmate #1 renamed the chat 'the exposure of namjoon'

daddy long legs: taehyung please