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Evil Geniuses and Their Desks

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By now, they've had sex, on like, every desk they have access to.

Maybe, it's a little weird, but what part of a sexy evil genius billionaire giving Cameron the time of day (much less orgasms) isn't weird?

Besides, Cameron likes weird as much as he likes making love on the bearskin rug in front of the giant fireplace in the Luthor mansion; as much as he likes getting sucked off en route on Lex's private helicopter (Lex's pilot has those big headphones, so it's not like he can hear Cam begging and squealing while Lex takes care of him.)

Before he got used to Lex's wealth and plethora of kinks, being tied-up spread eagle in Lex's massive bed with silk ties might have seemed a little weird to Cam. Sex in the Olympic-sized swimming pool in Smallville felt a little strange; going down on Lex on the balcony of the penthouse in Metropolis did also. Cam had never been bent over the side of a pool table and fingered until he screamed, so even that seemed unusual.

Now, though, the desk thing is probably the weirdest element of Cam's sex life (if you don't count the number of times Clark Kent has bust in on him and Lex having sex, the pervert.)

He's ridden Lex perched on the edge of the giant, mahogany writing desk in the mansion; let Lex spread him out on top the modern, glass desk in the penthouse office. Cam's been to every suite, cabin, chateaux, villa, and retreat in Lex's possession, and in every one, there is a desk where Lex conducts evil genius business and politics and all sorts of sexual acts on Cameron.

Cam's had so much desk sex with Lex that he can tell you how mahogany and cherry wood desks taste different. He instinctually knows how to cock his hips, when he bends over a desk, so as not to restrict little Cam's participation in the festivities. He instantly gets hard when in the same room as one of Lex's personal desks, which Lex loves.

Cam's hidden under Lex's desk and sucked him off through phone calls and meetings with Clark and Lex's father (by accident; neither of those two ever knock, and it's not like Cam could just jump up and announce himself. Besides, Clark went quiet and got out of there pretty damned fast.)

Cam's even experienced full-blown bondage thanks to the intricate system of cuffs and pulleys that can attach to a desk that Lex rigged up. (Cam came his brains out.) He might as well admit it - having an evil genius for a boyfriend is awesome.

What may be a little less awesome is having both an evil genius for a boyfriend and for a boss. He supposes the megalomania of the one was bound to clash with megalomania of the other eventually - despite how uncomfortably buddy-buddy they can get - but this isn't hope Cam was hoping it would happen.

"No, Lex," Cam says, when he sees where Lex is looking. "Bad... bad, Lex. That... is a very bad idea."

Cam is still out of breath. Beneath him, his desk squelches and creaks as Cam sits up. All of his office materials lay strewn over the floor. His desktop sits on his desk chair, its monitor watching them blankly.

He really should have known better than to ask Lex to pick him up from a late-nighter at Contra. There are so many desks here that (Cam assumes) haven't been fucked upon. Lex took the Roadster, so there isn't even a driver waiting outside as an excuse for bowing out of a round two.

Cam would never bow out of a round two with Lex, but he certainly wouldn't want one of his coworkers having sex on his desk. He loves them, but he doesn't think he could work with them anymore if Josh rubbed his tramp stamp all over the place Cam sets his meal when he works through lunch. He tries not to think about Mel and Dutch and sex, period (it's too confusing); Cash is mostly having sex with himself these days; and if Creepy Carol ever has sex, Cam never wants to know about it.

That just leaves one person, but if Oz has ever has sex on his employees' desks, Cam knows he'll never find out about it. Or if he does, he'll be promptly retconned - probably with something generic Oz bought off of Skymall just to test.

Lex acts like he doesn't know what Cam's talking about.

"I don't know what you're talking about," Lex says. His lavender dress shirt hangs open off of his shoulders and his ridiculous ab muscles flex as he turns to raise an eyebrow at Cam.

It does not help that he's wearing his sexy, 'I'm plotting evil but looking innocent while doing it' expression. Cam's got a weak spot for that one.

But he remains strong.

"We are not having sex on Oz's desk!" Cam insists.

"I didn't say that we were," says Lex, and then, "And why are you suddenly whispering?" In normal volume and everything.

Clearly, Lex has a death wish - Cam's fussing at him about doing crazy or just dangerous things all the time - but this is something probably only Contra employees and the citizens of Paraguay realize: if you evoke the name of Oz, he will in some form appear.

"There's nobody here," Lex says.

"We shouldn't be either," Cam says. He'll rush Lex out of here and make it up to him later with car sex. In the morning, he'll tell Cash burglars trashed his desk. Maybe he can borrow some stuff from the tech guys to make it look like they broke in with lasers. That'll catch Cash's attention. "Hand me my pants."

"Cam..." Lex slinks back to him and puts this hands on Cam's spread knees. Cam's spent cock wants to leap. "Take it easy... Have I ever asked you to do anything you didn't want to do?"

That's the problem. Cam's boyfriend is Lex fucking Luthor. He has some sort of preternatural ability to make Cam want whatever he wants, especially when it comes to fucking Cam til he's too blissed out to speak.

This is how Cam ends up curled up on his knees on the edge of Oz's desk with Lex holding him by the hips and pounding into his ass with searingly hot grunts and growls.

Cam has an unbelievable orgasm. But he frets about what Oz will do when he finds out all night.

The next day, his boss leaves him this note: 'The sex tapes will come in handy when your boyfriend's president. I'll allow it.'

Lex is thrilled.