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30-day PoPS Challenge

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Prompt List here.


~~~ It's like a riddle, you see. ~~~


Jonas didn't realise it until he read Virginia's mind. Love is like a riddle, you see? For some, it can be rather simplistic. Take Donald as an example; he loves pizza. He eats pizza and his body responds to the greasy molten cheese by releasing endorphins that scream, "Hey, that was awesome! More." And of course, he gets more. Jonas had deemed love nothing more than chemical reactions, your body sees something it likes and, bam, sends signals to your brain to get more of said-thing it likes - damn Id. But Virginia was a different story.


Despite all his pride and self-righteousness after practically saving the world, Jonas' deep-seated paranoia got the better of him one average day and he delved into the mind of his girlfriend. Using his powers on people usually involved focusing on a particular idea, as to not get lost in the void of the subconscious. Ignoring the inaudible voice in her head that questioned how much pink wool she had left, Jonas focused on his own name. It took him a while to pinpoint himself, brains constantly firing neurons and Virginia was an infamous over-thinker but when he found his own name in the depths of his mind, it wasn't at all what he was expecting.


Fond memories to flash by, particular surge of emotions that he'd be forced to feel or maybe even just a chemical formula but not... Colours. Colours that he'd never seen before skirted across his mind's vision like timid dancers, never staying in the spotlight long enough to fully acknowledge. Nameless shapes shifted in and out of existence, teasing him with the way they seemed to shift just within reach before pulling away. And sounds. Sounds that never existed before, filling his head with the most beautifully heartwrenching symphony. All of it raced through their combined minds as Jonas tried to anchor himself somewhere. He was overwhelmed. He brought himself back to reality, panting heavily as blood rushed to his ears, giving him the effect of standing under a waterfall. "Jonas, are you okay?" Came from behind the rushing water, or maybe in front of it. He couldn't speak, tongue rest like lead in his mouth and in response, he let out a pained whine as his head dropped to the wooden table.


Love is a riddle, you see.

Chapter Text

~~~ Rain was falling in the street. ~~~


The sound of the rain was intensified as Jonas sat under the bus stop, his lanky frame tucked in an overside hoodie; it was as though he sat under a waterfall with only an umbrella for protection. He shivered under the thick material of his jacket with his hands tucked under his armpits to protect his delicate fingers from the cold. He had pulled the strings of his hoodie to cup around his face and hide it from the biting wind.

The only reason his ass was going numb on the awkwardly-angled seat was because of the rain. The last time he'd got a cold, he'd cubed their cat whilst sneezing. Poor Jeffrey hadn't see it coming. So now, he wasn't going to risk walking home in the rain in fear of exploding one of his friends - and that wouldn't be the first time. Instead, he would suffer in seething silence as he waited for the next bus to arrive.

He huffed quietly when he saw a figure walking towards him. God help him if it was some old lady who intended to try and hold a conversation. He didn't look up from where he was boring a hole in his sneakers but he caught the sight of a bag of knitting material. Oh God, it was an old lady. He moved his hands to pull out his headphones from his pocket when he felt the seats shift under a weight of another body. He was too late, dang it.

"Hey, does this bus route go to Laurens Street?" A voice asked, all innocent and sweet. Jonas slowly turned to face a shy-looking woman. She had short brown hair, curled at the neck and wore thicked-frame black glasses. Tugging on her baby pink hoodie shyly, she looked at him with hopeful eyes.

"Yeah, it's like the fifth stop." He offered back quietly and blushed when she gave him a warm smile.

"Ok, thank you!" She said, genuine appreciation glistening in her voice.

They sat together in companionable silence, both listening to the sound of rain as it danced along the roof of the bus stop. Jonas contemplated talking to the girl, she was cute and seemed friendly. And he deserved cute and friendly after spending so long in solitude.

He wasn't against using his powers for his own personal gain, he'd done it plenty of times to trick the guy at the comic book store into giving him the latest edition of whatever he had wanted. But using his powers usually led to suspicion and being called a freak, so he restrained himself. However, after the angel and the devil on his shoulders tangoed and the devil ultimately won, Jonas turned to face the girl once more and delved into the depths of his mind.

He intended to find them a common interest, hoping that the Harley Quinn shirt she had hidden under her jacket wasn't just for aesthetic. What he found instead had him off the seats and putting some distance between him and her. Flashes of blood, knives and screaming faces had his heart thumping against his chest. The girl was a damn serial killer.

"Uh, are you okay?" She questioned in a sickly-sweet tone that had Jonas looking at her like she was insane.

"Y-yeah, I'm fine. Just got cramp from sitting down for too long." He laughed out, all awkward and nervous. Fortunately, she just assumed that was his personality - and she wasn't wrong - and returned to staring vaguely in the distance. Probably thinking about her next murder, he thought bitterly and spite bloomed in the place of fear.

This girl had sat next to him, spoke to him and smiled like she was normal. Like she wasn't tainted by the deaths, like they didn't matter or affect her. Jonas carried his murders and they weighed heavy on his shoulders but that didn't seem to be the case for her; it was almost like she enjoyed it.

Disgust filled his face as he took steps towards her, eyes narrowing accusingly. "Uh, is something the -?" She started to query as he stalked towards her until her eyes lit up with fear and confusion as he raised a hand. A moment passed and even the rain stopped to observe.

Then the girl was up, gathering her things and stumbling in her heels. "Where are you going?" Jonas smirked at her, a dark sense of justice glinting in his eyes.

"I gotta go to the police and tell them!" She all but squealed before she pushed past him in favour of running down the street, heading in the direction of the police station. And Jonas' grin grew as he stepped onto the bus that had arrived.  

Chapter Text

~~~ I keep having the same dream. ~~~


Donald woke in a cold sweat, hands trembling and short of breath. He white-knuckled the sides of the tub-bed as he wheezed like an overworked waiter while trying to bring himself back to reality.


He'd been having the same dream every day for a week. If he were a normal person, he would probably just dismiss it as a blip in his conscience but he wasn't a normal person. He was pretty sure he was 50% electricity and 50% McDonald's Chicken Nuggets; there's nothing wrong with that! Regardless, as a result of having a little extra spark in his life, Donald took the consistent dream to be some fucked-up prophecy. 

Usually, in the event of an emergency, he would high tail it to Virginia and extort her powers with an exceptionally good pair of puppy eyes - worked like a charm, jump in a portal and be the hero no one really asked for but got anyway. Instead, he stumbled out of the tub with the normal amount of pain in his back for someone who literally slept in a tub and made his way to the kitchen. Virginia was there, perched on a chair with some obscure book in her delicate hands, a cup of tea as her only companion.


"Hey, Virginia?" Donald tried, voice still hoarse from sleep.


"Yeah, Donald?" She asked distractedly, not looking up from her book.


Donald shifted towards the coffee maker, pouring himself a much-needed cup of joe before slumping into the seat across from her. "Do you ever have strange dreams more than once in a row?" He queried, trying to seem nonchalant as he nursed the coffee.


Virginia looked up at her book at those words, "Uh..." She hesitated, unsure if this was going to be a bait into some wacky adventure she most definitely did not want to take part in. She was pretty sure pigs would fly and poop rainbows before she could have a full day of peace - oh, how one can dream. "Um, no?" She replied, slightly worried. "Why?"


Donald wriggled in his seat, putting his drink down on the table before starting, "Well, I've been having this same weird dream for the past week and I don't know why. It's weird, like, I'm worried it's some heavenly message from above, ya'know? What if I'm being sent on a sacred mission from the big man upstairs? I'm not ready to be the Messiah! I can't handle that kind of pressure!" He was getting worried now and he wasn't even religious.


"Calm down, Donald. I'm sure it's nothing." Virginia spoke in her soft-but-no-bullshit voice, a stressed Donald usually led to some shocking (pun intended) results and she really, really wanted a quiet day. "What do you dream of?" She questioned, immediately regretting and bracing herself for the worse.


Donald scratched his beard and pondered over his psyche for a moment before deciding to be truthful to Virginia, he had come for help in the first place. "So, it starts with me at Taco Bell - which is completely normal for one of my dreams. So, then I go to the counter and order my taco and everything is fine and dandy until the girl at the counter gives me my taco and..." He paused to shudder to himself, leaving Virginia extremely concerned for a moment.


"It's a baby, Virginia... A baby taco!" He whispered, fear causing his pupils to dilate in a way that was just perfectly dramatic.


Virginia stopped time. She stopped time to take the longest sigh she had ever experienced, almost passing out thanks to a lack of oxygen. She also took time to collect herself before she booted time up again like an old windows computer.


"And this is a sign from God?" She asked, her voice straining under the pressure to not sound belittling.


"Uh, what else could it be?!" Donald replied frantically, completely unaware of her time travelling.


Virginia simply stood up, collected her book and tea, patted Donald on his shoulder with her free hand and told him. "Try speaking to Jonas about it, he might have a better clue about what your mission is." And walked away, missing out on the defeated look on Donald's face.


"What am I going to do?" He groaned as he cupped his face with his hands.

Chapter Text

~~~ 'He was willing to back up the claim that he could climb that tree.' ~~~


Donald considered himself quite the optimist. He was definitely a glass half full kind of guy, or at least tried to be; he always tried to see the best in every situation and do his best in every situation. But at this very moment, he was feeling rather pessimistic as bent over, legs stretched wide and breathing Darth Vader - probably sweating like the guy in the costume too. It happened a lot, as it would with most people, he would spontaneously have a health streak. He'd attempt to kick his ass back into shape by going on runs and ordering more vegetables on his pizza.

So, here he was. Barely holding onto life as his vision blurred under the strain of a lack of oxygen and his muscles ached like he'd ran a marathon - if a marathon was a 5 minute steady jog. And Brian hovered over him, not even the slighest semblance of a  sweat but, then again, the guy was a machine and not in the metophorical sense (Donald had half-expected the guy to sweat oil.)

"Are you sure this was a good idea?" Brain questioned, 98% sure that this was not a good idea. He didn't mind running, it was nice to be able to get out of their cramped 'house' and be able process the steady increase in temperature of the world - he was making a line graph for it.

"Yeah, I'll be fine. I'll be climbing trees in no time." Donald wheezed, more trying to reassure himself than his friend. Speaking of trees, he somehow managed to drag his body away from the public path and raised a hand to steady himself against a particularly old-looking oak tree.

He took a moment to take in his surroundings; he was in a park that was surprisingly well-kept and green for being in Chicago. The centre held a small pond where ducks and swans were stuffed with bread until they sank as children teetered on the edge of the water to spread America's love for carbohydrates. Most of the park was greenery, a lot of flat land with stubborn grass blooming across the landscape and trees of all sizes and ages standing stoically as their leaves fall to signify the first signs of autumn.

"It is highly unlikely you could climb trees when you aren't on the verge of collapsing." Brian scoffed dryly and caused Donald to shoot up from his position to glare at him with accusing eyes.

"Hey! I happen to be a great tree climber! If there was an olympics for climbing trees, I'd get gold. I could climb this tree." Donald defended himself with pride, arms crossing over his chest as his breath levelled out after he slapped the trunk of the sturdy thick oak.

The robot paused for a moment, eyelids closed robotically before they burst open, full of artifical life. "There is International Tree Climbing Championship in Wisconsin." He admitted before his face contorted into something akin to disbelief. "There is no way you could climb that. I did the math."

Donald's eyebrows flew to the top of his receding hairline and his hands moved to his hips in the perfect 'oh, no you didn't' stance. After pointedly clearing his throat, Mr. Dr. Electricon turned on his heels and stalked over to the tree.


"Brian, what do you want? I finally got my hands on the latest Batman and you're making me come outside when there's a perfect closet to protect me from social interaction." Jonas scoffed as he shuffled towards his robot friend - wow, as if life could get any weirder.

"Oh, hey Jonas!" A voice called out and left the ginger looking around with a confused look plastered on his face.

"Oh God, did you kill Donald and install his consciousness into your mainframe? Because I don't think Sebastian is going to be very happy about not having someone to fight crime with." Jonas said, half-joking but half-serious. Sebastian would be very upset and he wouldn't have anyone to release his sarcasm upon.

Brian only eyed him in a way that screamed 'thisfuckinghumanmustthinkhe'shilarious' before he shook his head and pointed a hand to the tree they were near.

"Hey, look, I'm in a tree! Maths can suck it!" Donald exclaimed, waving a hand in the air in celebration before he shifted slightly. The arm quickly wrapped back around the branch he was clinging to like a toddler to a baby.

"He's stuck." The robot claimed, voice sparkling with amusement.

"You've got to be kidding me." Jonas sighed, rubbing a hand against his forehead. 

Chapter Text

~~~ 'I said five grand, not five hundred! ~~~


"I said five grand, not five hundred!" The taller masked man hissed to the shorter one as Donald observed from a distance. A cool breeze snapped at his heels and the exposed flesh of his cheeks, tinting them red in the thick darkness of night.

"Surely the more, the better!" The short guy tried to defend himself, waving his gun in the air dramatically.

The taller man snorted and, in one swift movement, shoved his accomplice harshly. "You idiot!" He exclaimed, eyes glinting with accusation in the holes of his mask. "Five hundred grand is a lot more likely to attract attention than five grand." His tone was venemous with a hint disbelief - how could the guy not think that.

"Yeah, well five grand ain't gonna get me the yacht I want!" The shorter man retorted, shoving the other man back.

"We're in Springfield, James! What the fuck are you gonna do with a yacht... In Springfield!" Not-James shouted, frustration clear in his voice as he waved his hands in the air, like it might help to prove his point.

Donald was starting to regret his idea to extend his crime fighting to the rest of Illinois, looking back now, Chicago was big enough for him. And it had less criminal domestics in the middle of the street at night after a bank robbery.

"Fuck you, Thomas! I can drive it down to Chicago." James growled and jumped his partner. The two started wrestling, doing nothing more than cursing and name calling like children in a playground but with an extensive list of extra insults. The gun and black bag of money had been tossed aside as the two had their spat, only a few blocks away from the very bank they robbed.

Donald sighed, he still had to stop the crime, and slowly approached the two men. They were too engaged in their tango to notice the superhero pick up the gun and bag. "I'm just going to take this money and leave you two to do your thing, ok?" Donald asked, face covered by his hoodie and iconic - yet uncomfortable - lightning bolt mask.

James and Thomas immediately jumped to their feet and stared incredulously at Mr. Dr. Electricon, their eyes squinted in the dark light as they tried to see who had spoken.

"Hey, you're that guy in the news!" James offered, voice tinted with recognition and awe and Donald blushed under the dark of the night.

"Yeah, always happy to meet a fan." He announced, trying to be humble despite the fact he puffed out his chest in pride. When the shorter man began to approach him, much to the taller man's obvious disbelief, he shook his head.

"Look buddy, you're a criminal and I'm the good guy. I can't go making friends with the bad guys, it'll ruin my street cred." The superhero admitted sadly and watched with regret bubbling in his stomach as the man dropped his hand and his smile.

"Oh, ok..." Disappointment was evident in his tone and it caused Donald's lips to turn down.

"Look, just don't do crime and maybe next time we meet, you can actually shake my hand, ok?" He supplied and James nodded slightly, exhaling an 'ok' as he made his way back to his taller accomplice like a punished puppy.

As Donald hopped back into his portal home, Thomas' eyes were wide with shock and confusion. "What the fuck." He stated down at James.

Chapter Text

~~~ 'The birds just kept shrieking louder and louder.' ~~~


"I don't know why we're here... It's not like we can fit anyone else in our apartment." Virginia stated as she slipped between isles, arms folded and crossed against her chest as she fully committed to the fun-killing mother role.


"We're here to entertain Donald, we need to let him occasionally think he has freedom and a say in what goes on in the house." Jonas retorted dryly as he narrowly avoided a sweeping paw from a cage.


They chased after Donald, who was moving between animal enclosures with ease like he'd visited this pet store before and could navigate it blindfolded. In all fairness, he probably had; this was his equivalent to a library for a nerd or a comic bookstore for Jonas (same thing).


"Can we get a rabbit?" Sebastian perked up as she tilted her head to look up at the two playing parents from where she was crouched inspecting a bunny. It was chestnut brow, looked particularly soft and paid absolutely no heed to the hand that slipped between the bars of its cage to try and pet it.


"No." Jonas and Virginia hissed in perfect synchronisation and watched as Sebastian pouted and returned her attention to her could-be bunny.


Virginia felt bad, a little slither of guilt settled in her stomach as Jonas just rolled his eyes and commented, "We have Brian, he can be your bunny."


"There is no protocol against punching you, Jonas." The robot deadpanned as he attempted to tug his charge away from a tank of mice.


"But these would be great for my latest experiments!" Victor wheezed as he fought helplessly against Brian's demanding tugs.


"No, you're right Brian. You're probably more of a Furby, if I'm honest." Jonas snarked with a grin playing at the corner of his lips. Brian's face contorted into an 'ohnohedidn't' glare and he released the mad scientist in favour of pacing towards the sassy SOB, intent on intimidating him.


He was a few steps away when everybody's attention was drawn towards a piercing squawk, even Victor looked up from where he was assessing his next targets to look unimpressed. When a voice they all recognised made a flawlessly girly squeal, the entire platoon raced towards the noise.


They all stopped dead in their tracks when they saw Donald shying away from a cage. In said cage, was an Eclectus parrot with ruffled feathers. It clung to the cage bars with deadly sharp claws as it shrieked at Donald. And it just kept shrieking louder and louder.


"I didn't mean to!" Donald whined defensively as everyone shot him an annoyed glare. "I just came over to say hello and he started getting mad!" He eyed the bird with a mix of fear and upset, he had just wanted a friend - he normally got on great with animals. The creature hissed at him and spread its beautiful red and blue wings heatedly.


"Hey, maybe it wants to mate with you." Jonas offered with a shit-eating grin that fell from his face as the bird refused to shut up.


Donald had time to throw him a bitchface before one of the pet stores assistants came over and ushered them away from the bird as she moved to settle it.


Mother and father slipped out of the store with crazy grandfather and his awkward nephew. And they waited for the other two members of their dysfunctional family for a while. Eventually, Jonas sighed and moved to go back into the store; visions of Sebastian and Donald walking out with some exotic and expensive pet had plagued his mind for too long. "You stay here with Rick and Morty while I go grab those two." He grumbled to Virginia just as Donald and Sebastian exited the store.


Sebastian was wearing an overly joyous smile and Jonas knew just before he saw it, that they'd bought something. Donald trailed behind her, attention focused on the large tank he was carrying. The large tank that held a baby tortoise.


"God, damn it, you two. What did we say?" Jonas asked rhetorically as he glared at them.


Donald, unsure what else to do, held out the tank at arm's length to the ginger and stated timidly, "He's called John Laurens."

Chapter Text

~~~ 'I'm so sorry! It worked just fine before!' ~~~


"I'm so sorry! It worked just fine before!" Donald exclaimed as he frantically dived for the blender and switched it off. But the damage had already been done.


Chunks of banana and strawberry were scattered all over the tiny kitchen as lumps of yoghurt and ice cream dripped from the counter and onto the floor with an obnoxious splat. To make the situation worse, shards of glass from the blender itself were spread across the gooey mess and turned the kitchen into more of a hazard than it usually was.


Virginia stood with her arms crossed, eyes still half shut from recently awakening. She looked utterly unimpressed. "Really Donald? You managed to make our blender explode?" It wasn't really a question, more of a statement that sparkled with hints of annoyance.


"It's not like I did it on purpose!" The man whined as he tiptoed around the mess to grab a cloth. Virginia let out a sigh before following suit and crouching down to start cautiously collecting glass from the floor.


"I came down for tea and now you've turned me into a housemaid." She grumbled lightly and missed the way Donald's face dropped even further. Guilt settled low in his stomach as he pushed the mess of fruit and liquid around on the floor rather than actually cleaning it.


"I was trying to stick with my healthy streak, ya'know?" He paused for a moment as realisation dawned on his face, "This must be a sign from God - that I'm not supposed to be healthy."


Virginia scoffed, of course, he would use that as an excuse to stop trying to care for his body's well-being. "What, like those dreams you had?" She asked, sarcasm clear in her voice.


"Hey! Don't judge me, those dreams were unusually consistent." He grumbled defensively as his hand started to scoop up pieces of fruit.


"I just don't understand why it exploded, it's worked for us perfectly for months now." The woman admitted sadly, she had liked having a blender; not that she used it but it made the house seem more domestic and normal. And she needed normal.


"Well, Brian is going to turn on soon for our run and he gets all huffy if I'm not ready on time. So I may have..." He hesitated and raised his head to meet Virginia's accusing gaze.


"Imayhaveusedmypowerstotryandspeedthingsup." He blurted out and immediately looked down as his face flushed with shame.


When there was only silence, he slowly lifted his head back up to see his friend still cleaning up the mess. His brows knitted together as he watched her, he had fully expected her to sigh - maybe even throw an insult - and leave him to clean his mess alone. But instead, she remained.


"Just don't do it again, Donald. Ok?" She mumbled, far too tired to even try to comprehend how he thought that that would be a good idea. Donald nodded his response and the two worked well in companionable silence as they cleaned the kitchen.

Chapter Text

~~ 'Maybe if we toss something over it, nobody’ll notice.' ~~


"What are you doing?" Victor asked, his tone was incredulous.


"Maybe if we put something in front it, nobody'll notice!" Brian supplied as he pushed the couch with ease. Awesome robot super strength 1, IKEA furniture 0.


"You think they aren't going to notice that the couch moved?" The scientist scoffed, he was very much considering honesty at this moment. It'd be a lot easier to deal with his angry sort-of kids then try to explain the sudden decoration change.


"You'd be surprised at how much they don't pay attention." The robot admitted, brows raised as he started to shift the couch so it was straight. "I bet if we didn't mention it, Donald would just go to sit down where the couch originally was and fall on his ass." Heh, he liked the sound of that - watching humans experiencing pain was one of his favourite past times, very interesting to observe how their body reacted. Except Donald probably wouldn't stop whining for the next week if that happened.


"Someone will notice!" Victor exclaimed and raised his hands towards the couch for extra dramatic effect. "We at least need to think of a solid excuse before they come back."


The Fantastic Four (as Victor would call them to tease) were out on a group shopping trip - something Virginia had suggested after sending Donald and Sebastian out to get food. That had been a mistake; absolutely no vegetables, just microwave meals and pizza. And whenever Jonas went shopping they ended up with hardly any food and a concerning amount of ketchup. Instead, she had demanded they all go out shopping together to bond and not die of obesity.  


"What and the fact that you were messing with my wiring and cause me to kick a hole in the wall isn't a good enough excuse?" Brian snarked as he kicked some plaster under the sofa to try and conceal his crimes.


"They wouldn't understand, they're still mad over me putting marijuana in their Bolognese sauce to research the effects of weed on their powers." Not-Granddad grumbled, apparently still somewhat bitter over receiving hate for his experiment.


"I think it was a valid source of study, especially considering how alcohol affects Donald's powers." The robot companion defended his charge with an honest tone.


"Thank you, Brian." Victor replied with genuine appreciation. "But that doesn't hel-"


The click of the door and sound of voices all talking over each other had adrenaline pumping through Victor's body as he looked desperately at Brian with wide eyes.


"Donald, did you really buy a whole lettuce just for John?" Virginia's voice echoed through the house as Brian considered that if he was human, he would be worried.


But he wasn't human. Thank God- or the robot equivalent of God. So, when he sat on the couch and looked as casual as a robot could, he had a nonchalant smile.


It was only when the squadron came into their living room and sat in their usual places as though nothing was the matter, did the robot throw Victor a self-satisfied grin.  

Chapter Text

~~ 'She’d always wondered what she would find under there.' ~~

Sebastian tucked her hair behind her ears and dropped down to all fours. She had always wondered what she would find under Victor's bed and now she was about to find out.

The house had been small before but got even smaller when
Not-Granddad and his slightly psychopathic robot body guard joined the Squadron. And thus, to make room for Victor and Robocop, Virginia had given up her bedroom. She slept with Jonas, which wasn't an issue - except for the fact they were both stuffed in a closet. And Victor, being the old man he was with the old back he has, got her bed. Brian didn't need to sleep so the guy just sat on the floor near a socket at night to charge.

"Are you sure we wanna do this?" Victor could have all manner of things underneath his bed and Virginia did not want to be scarred for life if she found some mutated mouse. But Sebastian had insisted and continued to now.

The room had been in his ownership for awhile and no one had been in. Sebastian had expected jars full of eyeballs, flayed bodies hanging from the ceiling and chemical stands filled with beakers, bubbling with the most gruesome liquids. Virginia had just been worried about getting caught and having to experience confrontation. The room had been nothing like they expected.

It was almost disgustingly domestic. Not much had changed from when Virginia had it, the bed covers and curtains had remained the same, as well as most of the decorations. The only difference was the iPhone charger in the corner of the room and a few picture frames scattered on the surfaces.

Virginia had inspected them with shock to discover they were most pictures of Victor and Brian, a couple of people she didn't know and one of the PoPS all tuckered out and napping in the living room together - she didn't know whether to feel heart-warmed or creeped out. Victor was a guy of simple pleasures.

"Hey, look for a card down there! I still wanna know where he got his weed from." Virginia shouted down from where she was safely perched on the bed in case a reanimated hand came to life and got grabby.

"Ok, here goes." Sebastian whispered before pulling back the bed cover with a squeak of fear. She slowly opened here eyes, not even realising she had closed them and peered into the deep dark depths of the underneath land of the bed.


Well, not nothing. But no dead cats or ancient tomes like she had expected. Just a random sock and a small keepsake box. She reached out and pulled the box from where it had been hidden.

"There's just this." Sebastian announced with a pout, disappointment clear in her tone.

"Oh, thank God." Virginia sighed in relief - glad to not be playing house for another murderer.

"Maybe there's weed in here?" Sebastian tried as she shook the box slightly. There was a symphony of sounds, rustling of paper, possible clattering of coins but no squeal of a living creature.

Virginia hesitated for a moment and took time to consider her morals before promptly throwing them out the window for the sake of her curiosity. "Open it." She whispered like she was telling her friend to go to the forbidden section of the library.

And, Sebastian wasn't about to argue with Hermione. Slender fingers curled round the box lid and she pul-

"What are you doing?!" Victor hissed, stood in his bathrobe with an agitated glare at the two women. "Sebastian put that down, you have no right to invade my privacy like that!" He grumbled out loud and the two nodded their agreement.

"Sorry, Victor. It won't happen again, Victor." They promised in unison as they scrambled to leave him room. Once they were out, the old man scoffed and bent down to pick up his box.

He opened it to reveal a small flask of bright blue liquid.

He closed the box with an exhale of relief and started to wander around the room, looking for a new place to hide it.

Chapter Text

~~ That totally did not turn out the way I expected it to. ~~


"Uh, that totally didn't turn out the way I expected it to." Donald mumbled quietly as he stared at what kind of resembled a cake, his oven gloves still radiating warmth from taking it out of the oven. The thing had somehow managed to be overcooked and undercooked; half of it was still liquid that bubbled with heat while the other half looked like you could draw on the floor with it. 


"I'm sure he'll appreciate the effort!" Sebastian tried to keep the sometimes unhealthy optimism that had them both baking the cake to begin with.


It was Jonas' birthday and, being the salty, dead-inside, serial killer that he was, Jonas had no intention of celebrating his day of birth. But the troublesome two had other plans. Sebastian had managed to convince Virginia into taking her boyfriend out for a date while the two wreck- I mean - decorated the house; they had even intended on some candles but Virginia had given them her signature look and that plan immediately went out the window. They could have done with the candles really, considering the burnt smell that was now circling the house like a noxious gas. 


"He should appreciate the fact you didn't burn the kitchen down." Brian commented from the kitchen chair where he had been watching the humans attempt to bake. He knew it didn't take a robot to figure out their chances of success were low... But he was a robot and he calculated their chance of successfully baking a cake at 2.9%. Ah, gotta love numbers


"We wouldn't have burnt the kitchen down!" Donald stressed, waving his wooden spoon in the air like it somehow helped his case. 


A 'HAPPY BIRTHDAY' banner fell onto an open flame of the stovetop and it suddenly set ablaze. Donald squeaked, much to Brian's amusement, and leapt from the counter to grab a towel and start slapping the fire out. 


"You were saying?" Brian asked, more smug than a rich person who won the lottery, as Donald threw him a bitchface and Sebastian wondered why Fate chose to be so cruel.


They had decorated the entire house with balloons (on the floor because helium is way too expensive), birthday banners, silly string and they even managed to have a few party poppers on hand. Of course, Sebastian had been the master decorator while Donald nearly passed out trying to blow up balloons.


"I would sa-" Donald started but was suddenly silenced by a slap on his arm.


"They're here." Sebastian hissed and started to get into position, Donald following shortly after and Brian remaining in his chair.


"Yeah, Virginia, I understand that but don't you think th-"


"SURPRISE!" Donald and Sebastian shouted in unison before popping some party poppers and watching as the confetti settled on Jonas. A spiritless Jonas.


"Really, guys?" He grumbled as he brought a hand to push away the confetti hanging from his head. Virginia peaked over his shoulder with a smile and a thumbs up, at least she appreciated it.


"Oh yeah," Brian perked up in all his sarcastic glory. "They made you a cake too. If you wanna call it a cake."


"Look!" Sebastian cheered and thrust the tin into Jonas' face. He looked down at the abomination and gave a half-hearted smile, something warm had settled in his stomach at the thought his friends had tried to give him a birthday - though he'd cube anyone who dared him to admit it.


"Uh, thanks?" He mostly questioned, considering what he was looking at. After a punch in the shoulder, however, he cleared his throat and spoke with more confidence. "Thank you, guys." For trying.


Sebastian seemed overjoyed by his response and promptly placed the 'cake' down to pull Jonas into a hug, who just laughed quietly and returned it. Even Donald seemed pleasantly surprised.


They all shuffled into the kitchen, just in time for Victor to walk through the door. "I brought cake!" He exclaimed as he walked into the middle of the kitchen, showing off his My Little Pony cake.


Brian had told him the statistics and he embraced the role of Not-Dad and went out to get them a cake. No one mentioned the design.


Virginia was the only one trusted with a knife, so she was the one to cut the cake and hand out pieces. Once everyone had a napkin of sugar and flour in their hand, they all stood/sat in comfortable companionable silence to eat.


"Ya, know. This isn't a half bad birthday." Jonas commented with cake still in his mouth but a smile on his face.

Chapter Text

~~ 'She couldn’t figure it out no matter how many times she turned it around.' ~~  


"Uhhhh." Sebastian hummed as she stared at the Rubix cube. She couldn't figure it out no matter how many times she turned it around. So, she did what any other drooling three-year-old would do and put it in her mouth. 


Surprisingly, that didn't work either. The toddler let out a frustrated whine and looked around for help but she found none. Everything was huge and towered above her, from pink dressers to the rocking cot, everything seemed very overwhelming from where she sat on the soft cream carpet. And no one was around; her mother was at work and her father had nipped downstairs to make his 3rd cup of coffee - of the hour.  


Sebastian pouted to herself before scrunching up her face, chewing on her bottom lip in concentration as her eyebrows knit together. With a mystical pop, another Sebastian appeared.  


Sebastian inspected her other-self for a moment before she gave a toothy grin and raised a hand to wave dramatically. "Hello!" She shouted and watched as her 'twin' returned the favour, doing the exact same thing.  


The two stared at each other for the longest time before the original Sebastian pulled the Rubix cube from her lap and thrust it into the face of the other girl, who would come to be known as Fox Two.  


"Help." She demanded as she held out the cube that was too big for her chubby little hands and Fox Two gawped at it like it was the most precious jewel in the world or a cookie from the cookie jar. Eventually, the clone slowly reached up and took it, head tilting as she eyed it with a mixture of curiosity and confusion.  


There was further silence before Sebastian scoffed, snatching the cube and starting to rotate the different rows. "Like this." She instructed to Fox Two who watched with growing wonder. 


When the mechanics of the toy had been taught, unfortunately neither had the brain capacity to consider peeling off the stickers, the Rubix cube was back in Fox Two's hands. 


With obvious amounts of hesitation, the clone slowly started to twist the rows, completely unaware of what she was trying to achieve. Sebastian didn't know either.  


Little did either of the kids know that their father stood at the door, looking down on them as he nursed his mug of precious coffee and a warm smile on his lips. The two were far too enthralled in each other's presence to even notice when the hint of dark roast started to waft through the air.   

Chapter Text

~~ 'No, I said the thirty-fourth floor.' ~~


"Precious. I, uh..." Carl spoke into the phone, his hand rubbing his forehead.


"What's up?" Precious replied, completely unperturbed by the nickname. It had stuck with Carl and now it would stay forever - a little voice in the back of his head told him it would be on his grave stone. And he was okay with that.


"I'm lost." Carl admitted dryly as he tucked his cane under his arm and adjusted his grip on the phone.


"Alright, gimme a sec to figure out where you are." The other man responded and there was silence sans the violent tapping of a keyboard.


Precious had contacts. And said contacts had managed to hook him up with two phones that were paired and both could be tracked. Precious didn't want to lose his new friend.


"You're on the sixty-seventh floor." Precious' voice was sparkling with incredulity as he stared at the building plan on the laptop screen.


"Yeah, that's the floor we agreed on." Carl retorted, his brows now knit together with worry and confusion at his friend's tone.


"No, I said the thirty-fourth floor."




"You're blind, Carl, not deaf. How did you even manage sixty floors?" The man on the phone was both amazed and extremely concerned for his friend.


Carl sighed for so long he almost blacked out. He grabbed his cane and started walking back towards the stairs were, his arm outreached to find a wall and use it to guide himself.


"They better accept our damn resumes." He grumbled bitterly.

Chapter Text

~~ 'Why did the telephone keep doing that?' ~~


Damon hated going out into the human world; seeing all the weak and petty humans made his meatsuit have a very unpleasant feeling in his stomach. But it was required of him. Not only did he have to interact with the outside world to understand how society functioned and indentify its weak points to extort, but he also needed milk. And some more scarves.


The milk was for Mr. Paslow, who demanded a cup of tea. Strange. But apparently it was also needed for Trisha - "It helps keep her ready to smash some teeth in." Had been what the man had said. And Damon did not understand how baseball bats worked, so he just accepted the idea and ventured out into the city.


He strode down the city streets, scarf waving majestically in the breeze as he kept his head high and back straight to make his superiority clear to all peasants. He looked like the definition of a man on a mission.


Until, a device in his coat pocket vibrated. With a sigh, he dipped his gloved hand into his pocket and pulled out his phone. He stood in the middle of a busy street, people twisting at awkward angles to avoid him as he frowned at the screen.


He had retrieved the knowledge from another body on how to text and call but this was new. Examining the screen with growing frustration, he noticed that Riley's face was darting about the screen; everything was blurry and he could not hear anything.


After a sigh, he took the glove off his spare hand with his teeth and brutally clicked down on the glowing green 'Accept' button.


The phone burst into a symphony of noise, mostly echoes and a mumble of Riley's words.


Eventually, it died down and so did the constant moving of the phone. Riley's face filled the screen, only occasionally moving, and his smile took up most of it.


"Hey, sir!" Riley grinned into the camera, all enthusiastic like he always seemed to be.


"This better be important, Riley." Damon grumbled back, pulling his scarf closer to his mouth to hide his secrets and keep his meatsuit's body warm.

"Oh, of course, sir!" Came the response before a lot more shuffling and the camera was nothing but blur until it settled on Riley once more. Riley holding a sword.


"I've got a sword, sir!" Riley offered, showing off the weapon by waving it like one would wave a hand.


"I can see that, Riley." Damon commented dryly, "I hope you do not intend to use that on the Electricon." He wanted to take the powered man while he was still alive so that it made caring for the body much easier.


"Oh, no. Of course not, sir! I just wanted to show you my skills." The swordsman said before handing the phone to Gabe.


Damon sighed dramatically and started walking again, keeping his attention on the phone to appease his minions. A happy workforce was an effective workforce, after all.

Chapter Text

~~ 'It was as if the cat just appeared out of nowhere.' ~~


 It was as if the cat just appeared out of nowhere.


It arrived one day, curled up in the tub-bed with Donald. It was something of a pleasant surprise for the human generator - to wake up with a warm fuzzy ball of heat in the morning. But it was also concerning, at least for Jonas.


"No, it's gotta go. We are not keeping it." He announced to his flatmates the moment he saw the little thing in Donald's arms. Everyone else was in the kitchen sans Donald and Jonas knew that meant he had either done something wrong or gone on a very lonely bender.


The girls cooed the moment they caught on and immediately moved to crowd Donald, speaking in high pitches as they worshipped the animal. It took Jonas a moment to realise that Brian had also moved to covet the cat.


He glanced at Victor, eyebrows drawn down as he silently questioned not-dad. When he received a shrug as a reponse, he returned his attention back to Donald. "We're not keeping it." He told the crowd of roommates.


"It needs a name!" Sebastian announced in favour of listening to Jonas.


"It is a he." Donald offered as he moved his arms out to make sure everyone could praise the cat equally and the cat seemed utterly satisfied with his decision.


"We're not kee-"


"What about Mr. Mittens?!" Brian asked with far too much enthusiasm for the situation - the situation being a cat that they couldn't keep and that he was literally a robot. But the chorus of indistinguishable agreements drowned out Jonas' exaggerated sigh.


"Where did it even come from?" Jonas tried instead, voice incredulous. Maybe Donald had really gone out on a bender and come back with a different type of pussy.


The sudden mental block that had them all ignoring Jonas was suddenly lifted - shocking - and Donald poked his head over the girls and robot to reply. "I dunno, I just woke up and there was a cat on my stomach." He paused to think for a moment. "For plot convenience?"


"Uh, what?" Jonas asked, tilting his head. He was almost 90% sure his friend had gone out drinking... A lot.


"What?" Donald retorted, eyebrows knit together in confusion. "I just said I woke up with the little fella."


"Sure... Ok." Jonas relented, he had learnt not to question some things.

Chapter Text

~~ 'Run, lady, run!' ~~


"Run, lady, run!" Donald shouted, voice all heroic as he gestured madly for the old woman to make a break for it.


The street was dark, shadows covered the faces of the thugs who stood defensively. Only the sound of passing cars and crackling light posts filled the air as the tension grew, both sides waiting for the other to make the first move.


Donald grinned as he felt electricity shoot down his arm and roll out in physical form as a whip. "Who wants to go first?" He asked darkly, his hand twitching with the need to strike.


The thugs looked at each other, disbelief sparkling in their eyes. They were starting to regret trying to mug that poor old lady's purse. Who does that?


The original story that caught Donald's attention was that four hooded men had attacked an innocent old lady. By the end of the crime, two of the men were dead alongside the elderly woman - all shot. Donald was curious as to how two of the thugs had died but, rather than mull on it, he decided to work his magic and save lives.


When none of the guys stepped forward, the grin on Donald's face grew as he started to stalk forward, hoping to scare them into running away or encourage them to try and hit him. Oh, how he loved it when they tried.


But a firm grip on his shoulder had Mr. Dr. Electricon twisting his head to see the old lady glaring at him, her eyes burning with fiery passion. She pulled him back by his shoulder and paced towards the group of men, completely missing the way she made the Superhero stumble back.


Donald didn't even get a chance to bark out some kind of warning as the woman raised her purse in the air Mjolnir. Much to the bearded man's shock, the thugs did not hesitate. They took one glance at the woman and turned tail and ran, running faster than Donald assumed they'd be able to.


What the hell?

Chapter Text

~~ 'There’s something not right about its eyes.' ~~


Roxy held the guinea pig up to her face, close enough that she could hear the celery she'd fed the thing being brutally destroyed.


"There's something not right about your eyes." She grumbled to the creature, as though it might speak back to her and reveal all the answers. Its eyes were very special - at first, the stay-at-home scientist had assumed it was just a trick of the light but upon further inspection, she discovered that the small mammal's eyes kept changing colours.


Purple, brown, green, yellow, red to that colour of caramel when it's not quite fully cooked yet. She was almost 100% certain that the eyes had flickered all 50 shades of gray.


But there was more to it. The eyes were dull and lifeless, as though the poor guinea pig had stared into the void for too long and started hearing the steady beat of drums. Devoid of all emotion and it sent shivers up Roxy's spine; something about that gaze had her moving to put the creature back into its cage as soon as she could.


The woman had decided to devote her life to studying guinea pigs after some apparent incident with the one she had experimented on. Virginia had not told her much, most just warned her not to experiment like that again and that powers are not something she should thrive for.


Of course, the woman with the ability to stop time and create portals was going to say that. She wasn't a meagre boring peasant human who felt so lost and insignificant in such a huge universe. She had purpose - or at least some sign from a higher being that there was reason for her existence. Roxy did not believe that she did.


So, she studied guinea pigs, buying as many as she could with what little money she had. Whether or not she ever resorted to stealing was a secret she would take to the grave. She studied their brains, their behaviours and even when the defecated. All were written down and stored away in a Hello Kitty diary - lock and all.


She was determined to find out what dimension the guinea pig - that nearly ended the world - had jumped to and from when stopping time.


One day, she would realise the truth.

Chapter Text

~~ 'The stain on the ceiling had a very distinct shape.' ~~


Donald wasn't gay.


Or at least, he didn't' think he was. He could appreciate a man's physical appearance, even find it attractive sometimes... Ok, so maybe he was bi but, being in his late twenties, he was sure he had missed the opportunity for a sexuality crisis. He tried not to dwell on it too hard.


But when there's a stain on the ceiling - one is forced to stare at all night because they sleep in a literal bathtub - with a disturbing amount of accuracy to the shape of a dick, he could not help but stare.


He wasn't sure when it had decided to grace the bathroom ceiling with its presence, it kind of just appeared one day, but it was starting to bother him. Not only did the gross brown colour now have the first hints of mould growing over it, but it was directly above his head.


But that wasn't even the best part. The best part was that it kept disappearing.


Despite his knowledge that Jonas would probably make some form of a 'dickhead' joke, he told his friend of the stain and even lead him into the bathroom to show him. He wanted a professional dick to see if it really did look like a dick or if he was just going insane. However, the short trip to Donald's makeshift bathroom was uneventful as there was nothing on the ceiling bar a few cobwebs.


He tried to show all members of the household the stain but it always seemed to vanish from sight. Jonas had groaned at having to walk any amount of distance for no real purpose, Virginia had just given him an exasperated sigh and went back to her knitting, Sebastian had pouted and been disappointed at the lack of ceiling-dick and Victor had gone to check whether he'd put marijuana in Donald's food again without realising. Donald had tried to get Brian to look, maybe hoping the robot would be able to use some kind of magic ECHO-eye bullshit to see it. Alas, the android had just threatened to suck the electricity out of him for bothering him at 3am in the morning when he was supposed to be charging. Kinky.


But Donald was not deterred, he was determined to do something about the stain. He ordered a bucket of white paint from online - because going outside to buy anything that wasn't food just isn't worth the effort.


The Squadron was too poor to even consider buying ladders, so he made use of several boxes and a few couch pillows to stack inside the tub in order to reach the ceiling. Balancing precariously, he painted on several layers of white. It took him all day, which isn't surprising when considering how many sandwich breaks he took.


It was 11 pm by the time he considered himself done. With a satisfied smile, he slipped out of the bathroom to clean up his mess and get dressed for sleep. When all was cleared away, he settled into his tubbed with contentment gracing his features and closed eyes. Moonlight flooded the room from the only window, leaving lasting shadows and lighting up the room only slightly.


Donald opened his eyes to admire his work and the ceiling-dick glared back at him tauntingly.

Chapter Text

~~ 'There’s a funny story behind all this, surely.' ~~


Victor was a man of science. But there comes a point in everyone's life where one will pray to some form of higher being for something and for Victor, a generic Wednesday was this day.


He prayed to just about every God, Goddess and celestial being to ever exist that there was a funny story to what laid before his eyes. Or more accurately, who laid before his eyes. It didn't even have to be a funny story, just slightly entertaining. Maybe even angsty, he liked a sprinkle of angst every now-and-then.


He took a moment to reconsider his role as Not-Dad, thinking that he should probably have to put a bit more effort into the role his past-self pretty much forced upon him. Screw you, past-self! That moment was also spent staring down at a body. A very naked body. A very naked Donald's body, laid face down on the carpet with his ass on show for any poor too-old-for-this-shit scientists to see.


As though the bare ass wasn't enough, the guy had what looked like a lightning bolt drawn on his back with marker. The temporary tattoo was huge, spanning and reaching all down his back, outlined in black and filled with yellow. It would have been impressive if it wasn't just outright weird.


Bottles of alcohol were scattered all across the kitchen and, as Victor followed the trail of budding alcoholism, he noticed that the bottles were spread into the living room too.


The next body to meet his gaze - thankfully dressed this time - was Jonas'. The guy was sprawled out across the table, jaw open and snoring lightly as drool trickled from the corner of his mouth and onto... Brian.


Brian was sandwiched between the table and Jonas. The robot had either somehow managed to break his systems by consuming alcohol, discovered how to sleep or simply just powered down. But his arms were wrapped around Jonas' waist as his stomach accommodated for the sleeping human, who looked oddly peaceful. It was a nice gay moment - despite the fact that Brian was a robot and didn't really have a gender so it wasn't homosexual (robosexual?) - and Victor captured the moment on his cell phone with a sly smirk plastered across his face.


As Victor played the POPS own version of Total Wipeout to move into the living room and relax, he saw the cherry on top of the hangover cake. It seemed Virginia was the only one capable of self-control as she was nowhere to be seen. Sebastian, on the other hand, did not.


It was a sight to behold, not one Victor would be forgetting for a long time, to see a literal pile of Sebastian's littering the room. There had to be over twenty of the same woman, all passed out on the floor in a variety of different styles of clothing. They covered all of the floor and made for a particularly interesting version of the 'floor is lava' for Victor as he tried to get to his favourite spot on his couch.


A sick and twisted smile graced Victor's features as he flicked off the frozen image of Bert and Ernie - he was not going to question anything else - and moved over to load up YouTube. It took some time but none of the drunken people even stirred. Until...