I remember vividly what I thought the first time I saw the Twelfth Doctor.
I was watching the 50th anniversary special at the cinema.
Peter's attack eyebrows suddenly appeared on screen.
The whole audience started cheering and whooping like crazy.
And in that moment I knew, I just knew we were in for a great ride.
A year later, Peter's first full episode was released.
I was about to watch it in the middle of the night, thinking that yes he could act, he was charming, he looked 'Doctor-y',
"But what if I don't like his take on the character? What if he's too different, or not different enough?"
"What if I end up not enjoying the series any longer?"
Ten minutes in the episode, all my silly fears were swept away.
He stepped out of his TARDIS owning the role,
shutting everyone up, acting loony, making grumpy remarks, delivering wise, heartbreaking speeches.
And he was the Doctor straight away.
We had never had a Doctor like him in the new series before.
He wasn't gentle or cheerful. He wasn't friendly or lovable.
Instead, he was detached, cold, rude, antisocial, arrogant, overbearing.
Even in their darkest moments, no modern Doctor had been so continuously bad-tempered.
He seldom smiled, he didn't like laughing people, and his puns were terrible.
He didn't like hugs nor people violating his personal space.
He didn't need anyone around. He wasn't nice, thank you very much.
And I was shocked. Positively shocked.
I'd never seen such stereotypically bad traits animate such an intrinsically good character.
I'd never seen a hero, my hero, portrayed like that.
And I immediately felt a deep bond with him.
Because many of those personality traits, I shared them too, and I knew what they really meant.
He had made a clear statement that he didn't care, but I could easily see through his behaviour.
He was a liar.
Deep down, he still cared about everything.
If anything, he cared even more than before.
DOCTOR: I had a duty of care
He cared so much, he had to put on a mask and pretend he didn't.
Because emotions slow you down and make it harder to do what you have to do.
There's no time for mourning or outrage when you're trying to save the world.
Still, that doesn't stop you from feeling pain.
Despite his facade, all the Twelfth Doctor wanted was to do the right thing.
He wanted to be good.
The most unrelatable of Doctors became the one I related to the most.
Soon it was obvious that at his core the Doctor was still hopelessly sentimental.
It showed through his relationships with his companions.
He tried to protect them and took care of them in every possible way.
Clara, for whom he punched a diamond wall for four and a half billion years.
River, for whom he built a restaurant on Darillium just to give her the happy ending she deserved.
Bill, whose soul he rescued from the Cybermen.
They taught him how to show emotions. They allowed him to lower his mask.
They taught him that the only thing that mattered was being kind.
So he embraced his kindness and lived by it.
Kindness defined him so much that he was able to pass it onto other people as well.
His morality affected Missy, changing her into a better person.
And it influenced the viewers as well.
The Twelfth Doctor has had one of the best evolutions in the entire series, and his journey has inspired me personally to follow in his footsteps
- to be a good man without hope, without witness, without reward.
His message has really struck me, and it will live long after his time on the show is over.
So now that his song is ending, I just want to thank the Twelfth Doctor for his contribution to the character, and to my personal growth.
Thank you Twelve.
Thank you Peter Capaldi.
Thank you Doctor Who.
DOCTOR: Everything ends, and it's always sad.
But everything begins again too, and that's always happy.