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A Good Old-Fashioned Rogering (or: A Couple of Cute English Guys)

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‘Honestly,’ the Doctor scoffed, ‘it is scarcely so unusual that I should enjoy the act of penetration. I’m surprised at you, Peri, that you should buy into the absurd, essentialist fallacy that taking the penetrative position is synonymous with weakness or effeminacy.’

Peri, who had gone faintly pink about the edges, forcibly interrupted him. ‘It’s not that, Doctor, honestly. It’s just-- I don’t know, you don’t really seem the type.’

‘Just because I’m a powerful figure of noble bearing and great command--’

‘Great command, huh?’

‘-- doesn’t mean I am incapable of yenning after a good old-fashioned rogering!’

Peri pressed a hand to her mouth in a futile attempt to muffle her laughter, but there was nothing to be done about the way her shoulders shook. The Doctor gripped his lapels with as much imperious dignity as was conceivable under the circumstances and harrumphed.

‘If you don’t want to, you need merely say,’ he sniffed, tone faintly injured, and held the pose until Peri’s giggles settled down.

‘It’s just, the way you put it!’ Laughter bubbled up again, and she shook her head, quite unable to speak for a few more moments, making apologetic hand gestures in the Doctor’s direction. Eventually, she took a deep breath. ‘In case you hadn’t noticed, I’m not exactly equipped for that sort of thing?’ She waved a hand vaguely over the crotch of her lime green leggings.

The Doctor rolled his eyes expansively. ‘That, my dear Perpugillium, is what strap-ons are for.’


‘A facsimile of the membrum virile, crafted for the precise purpose that--’

Peri rode over him before he could give her a comprehensive lecture on the history of sex aids. ‘I know what a strap-on is, I’m not stupid. But you’re seriously telling me that you’ve, what, got a box full of sex toys sitting around in the TARDIS?’

Delicately, he cleared his throat. ‘I may have a few tucked away here and there, discreetly.’

Peri’s giggles had started up again, but this time she managed to speak through them, nodding decisively. ‘Well, if you can supply me with the necessary equipment, I would be more than happy to fuck you in the ass.’

‘A vulgarian’s phraseology, but--’

‘Oh, come on! You said you wanted to be fucked up the ass, I think a little vulgarity is unavoidable.’

‘Well!’ The Doctor looked faintly scandalised, though his eyes were twinkling. ‘Americans. Fucked up the ass,’ he lapsed into a brief, unflattering imitation of her accent, ‘indeed. I suppose if you insist.’

‘I do. I also insist that you wash beforehand.’

‘I am not an animal, Miss Brown, of course I shall--’

Quite suddenly, the room around them settled with a thump and a ding. Both the Doctor and Peri left off talking and looked up, the Doctor’s eyebrows furrowed and Peri’s lifted into little arches.

‘Were we expecting the TARDIS to land?’

We,’ the Doctor intoned, ‘were not. But then, the old girl does do as she pleases. Where’ve you landed us, old girl, hmm?’ Absently, he petted one of the walls, looking entirely as if he expected the ship to answer him. Peri, more practically, went over to the console and pulled up their coordinates.

‘The planet Viperon, apparently,’ she read out. ‘In the... city? I think it’s a city. Whatever, somewhere called Yravisss, in the year 3999-oblique-gamma-sigma.’

The Doctor frowned thoughtfully and crossed over to join her at the console, turning on the viewscreen. The corner of a building filled most of the monitor, and beyond it a landscape that looked oddly waxy, as if everything had been half-melted. ‘Yravisss,’ he muttered to himself. ‘I’ve been here before. In fact, I think I’m here now!’

Peri waited for him to say that that meant they must leave at once, to declaim in that way he had that the galaxy would surely explode if he and another him occupied the same time and place! Instead, a positively devilish expression eased its way onto his face, his cheeks dimpling under the force of his impish grin.

‘D’you know, Peri, that’s given me an idea.’


Doctor,’ the Doctor sighed, ‘I hardly think--’

‘Oh, really,’ snapped the other Doctor, ‘you needn’t be so Puritanical about it, it doesn’t suit us at all.’

‘It isn’t a matter of-- I am not Puritanical.’

‘He is, though, you know,’ said the one in patchwork, leaning over to Peri with an air of smug confidentiality. ‘Dreadful prude; turns pink at the slightest provocation.’

Peri bit her lip, trying hard not to smile as, just as he’d said, the younger Doctor flushed delicately from his open collar up to his ears. ‘You were-- are-- kinda, well, English, Doctor. I don’t know how you managed with me and Erimem sometimes; you’re way too easy to tease.’

The pink deepened, and the Doctor exhaled hard through his nose. ‘Now, look here, Peri, there is nothing at all wrong with being English, as you put it. And that’s hardly the point; I can’t believe you’re encouraging him!’

‘Oh, enough of that. It’s sadly obvious that you’re only refusing out of some misplaced sense of the virtuousness of chastity. Peri here has quite enthusiastically consented to the whole thing, so you needn’t worry about taking advantage, and you’ll forget all about it afterwards, once we’ve restored you to your own time stream. Won’t remember again until you’re me, at which point the whole affair will be moot. Furthermore,’ he ploughed ahead as the other Doctor opened his mouth to object, voice lifting to a rhetorician’s bellow, ‘I know perfectly well that you’d like the chance to be on top far more often than you ever get to in this body. Here I am offering you a crack at my frankly pulchritudinous posterior; I’d call it churlish to refuse, under the circumstances.’

It was, Peri thought, possibly the grandest speech ever delivered for the purpose of trying to convince someone into a threesome. But it seemed to work, as, after a moment, the other Doctor shrugged, and broke into a shockingly boyish grin. It was the sort of smile that suited his face so well it only emphasised how seldom he took it out for airing.

‘Well, when you put it like that. Ah, Peri, if you’re sure…?’

He trailed off, every inch the gentleman as he inclined his head slightly in her direction. Peri exhaled a little laugh, and smiled cheekily.

‘Not gonna lie, I did sometimes used to wonder what you looked like under that ridiculous uniform.’

The Doctor in patchwork looked ever so slightly smug. The younger one protectively brushed down the sleeves of his cream-coloured coat, looking askance at her. ‘There is nothing ridiculous about my clothes; cricket is an ancient and noble art. Besides, I think they rather suit me.’

Peri shook her head, smiling wryly. ‘Geez, between the two of you. Ego the size of a small country, and you still don’t know how to take a compliment.’

Which was how they ended up in Peri’s bedroom. Peri had pulled the younger Doctor close and was slowly, thoroughly kissing him into incoherence, whilst the other Doctor stood by the bed behind them, unhurriedly unknotting his cravat. He’d already shucked his coat, a splash of colour hung over the bed’s footboard like a fallen flag.

‘You are allowed to touch, y’know,’ murmured Peri, breaking away from the kiss with a little laugh. The better to facilitate touching of a mutual variety, she slipped the last button on his shirt through its hole, tugging it off and tossing it aside.

The Doctor behind her snickered, faintly unkindly. The other Doctor, whose hands had stalled hovering over her hips, looked ready to fire off a retort, but Peri pulled him back down, and any response was muffled into an mmmph against her mouth.

‘Faint heart never won fair Peri, old chap,’ admonished the Doctor, whose cravat had fallen by the way, and who was now working on his shirt buttons.

This time it was Peri who nearly pulled away, perhaps to point out that she hardly needed winning, but the Doctor’s hands on her hips chose that moment to press a firm, very intentional slide up her belly and sides to cup her breasts. In tandem, all three of them sighed, and Peri’s hand tightened briefly in the Doctor’s hair.

‘That’s, ah, that’s--’ The Doctor looked distinctly dazed when Peri pulled away again, eyes wide and intense, lips kiss-bruised.

‘Yeah?’ Peri prompted lazily, looking up at him through heavy lids.

‘That’s-- nice?’ he finished rather lamely.

Nice?’ snorted the other Doctor. ‘Of all the milquetoast--’ He slid up behind Peri, one hand going to caress the exposed underside of a breast, fingers finagling their way under his self’s hand to pluck at a nipple. Involuntarily, her shoulders and hips pushed back against him, spine arching in such a way as to push herself further into the touch. His other hand spread itself across her stomach.

‘I can think of a hundred more apposite descriptors than nice, when you’ve got your hands full of--’

‘If you so much as think the word fulsome, buster,’ warned Peri, ‘I will clock you.’ The breathless timbre of her voice did nothing to diminish the threat.

‘I’d not dream of it,’ he assured her, and delivered a bite to her ear. For a few moments, he distracted himself sucking on her earlobe, before moving down to mouth idly at her neck. The other Doctor had picked up where he left off, rolling one of her nipples between his fingertips, occasionally tugging just a little, just enough for it to feel like a marionette string all the way down to her cunt. Peri didn’t bother holding back her thready little sighs and moans, allowing herself to just loll between them for the present. When the Doctor in front of her bent to mouth over the peak of one of her breasts, flicking his tongue over the nipple and then drawing it into his mouth with tortuously good suction, she positively squealed.

‘She’s very vocal,’ the Doctor commented, in a tone Peri thought was unflatteringly as if he were narrating a nature documentary, breaking away from her neck and stepping back, and the younger Doctor huffed a brief laugh against her breast. She shivered a little at the puff of air over her nipple, standing out dark brown and shiny with saliva.

‘I hardly would have imagined she’d be otherwise.’

‘I am actually here, you guys,’ Peri grumbled. ‘You know, in the room? With you?’

‘As indeed am I!’

At that rather grand declaration, the younger Doctor straightened, and both he and Peri turned to see the Doctor, quite naked, arms flung wide. It should have been absurd-- it was absurd, but the Doctor seemed quite aware of that, and not in the least bit ashamed despite it. Inclining his head a degree or two in Peri’s direction, he lifted an eyebrow. ‘As you can see, Peri, I did perform all requisite ablutions earlier.’

The younger Doctor’s expression took on a subtly sardonic aspect. ‘Cleanliness is next to godliness?’ he suggested lightly, and Peri groaned.

‘Oh, come on. You can’t give him an opening like that; we’ll never get around to the sex!’

‘Goodness, I do develop an ego, don’t I? Well then, we shall simply have to head off any impending monologues.’

Briskly, he stepped out from behind Peri to face up to his self, eyes sweeping up from the firmly planted bare feet (perhaps half a size bigger than his, quite widely set toes) all the way up to his face (stubbornly fixed mouth, nicely eloquent eyebrows). ‘What’re your thoughts on kissing this time around? I always find it interesting how these things change from regeneration to regeneration. I imagine you must be more sexual generally than I am; it certainly would never have occurred to me to go searching out another self simply in order to fulfil a fantasy.’

‘I imagine I must be.’

‘Well, let’s test it out, shall we? In the spirit of scientific advancement.’

The younger version of the Doctor, as Peri had discovered, kissed lushly, all soft lips and open mouth and (surprisingly) enthusiastic tongue. His elder self was inclined to approach things in a much more circumspect, coaxing manner. Holding the other Doctor still with a hand on the side of his face, he dipped in again and again for the merest, tantalising brush of lips. With both their mouths open, Peri caught occasional, brief glimpses of tongue, faintly trembling as they reached just barely to touch. It was shockingly erotic to watch.

When the elder Doctor finally deepened the kiss, the younger one made a high, caught sound into his mouth, a nasal little whimper, before pressing the advantage of his height and taking control of the kiss. Peri could feel internal muscles clench; her pulse beat hard in her groin.


It had only been a thought, a dazed, surprised reflection, but it came out out loud anyway, rather croakily.

It broke the kiss. Both Doctors looked at her, one with a rather pleased little smile, the other with eyebrows raised in a show of feigned amusement.

‘Enjoying yourself?’

‘You would too.’ Her voice cracked slightly, and then she laughed. ‘Jesus, it’s like a live-action porn show; I shoulda brought a video camera.’

The younger Doctor arched an eyebrow. ‘Gracious, the two of you must have an interesting time of things.’ Then he turned his attentions back to his Self, forehead furrowing as he licked his lips speculatively, as if pondering the complexities of a mouthful of wine. ‘Mm, yes, rather nice. Rather subtler than I would have expected, given your, ah--’

‘Given my what, precisely? If you’re going to insult me, do at least have a go at something more original than my dress sense.’

‘I was hardly about to,’ the Doctor said mildly. ‘It might be your approach to things, but I tend not to insult people I’m about to sleep with, even when they are myself.’

The elder Doctor opened his mouth to retort, but his Self took the opportunity to kiss him again before he could, twisting a hand into his hair and licking into his mouth without any preamble. Deep and languorous, a slow, thorough tongue-fuck of a kiss, and when he broke away with a last, leisurely lick across his parted lips, they both looked a little dazed. The elder Doctor coughed.

‘Yes, well. Hem. Shall we--? As I recall it, you’re not terribly keen on oral sex, this regeneration.’

‘Not terribly,’ agreed the other Doctor.

The Doctor grinned. ‘Well, fortunately for us all, I am. Sit there, would you?’ He gestured at the edge of the bed, and then turned to Peri. She had taken the moment to get out of the rest of her clothes, and the Doctor lifted an appreciative eyebrow to see her standing there completely nude. Stupidly, she could feel herself blush a little under the scrutiny, and stubbornly, she lifted her chin, refusing to be embarrassed. The Doctor’s smile turned kindly.

‘Come join us?’

Inviting her to sit between the younger Doctor’s spread knees, he bent to kiss her again, soft and brief, before sinking to make his way down her chest and stomach until he was on his knees before her. As he dipped further, mouthing hotly along her thigh, the Doctor behind her ran apparently idle fingertips up the length of her neck, over her ear, down her shoulder.

‘If I may, Peri,’ he murmured into her hair, ‘you really are-- quite lovely. I wouldn’t say normally, but, well, given the circumstances...’

Peri laughed a little breathlessly, and the sound turned into a yelp when the Doctor bit the arch of her foot.

Tease,’ she accused vehemently. ‘Your other self’s up here giving me the-- ah-- the sweet nothings treatment, and you can’t even--’ He sucked her middle toe into his mouth, and she squeaked-- ‘can’t even get down to business.’

He got down to business.

‘Oh-- aw, fuck.’

As the Doctor probably would have told anyone, one of his foremost attributes lay in the dexterousness of his tongue. It was just as true when he wasn’t speaking. Peri sagged back against the younger Doctor’s chest, and he slipped a hand firmly around her ribs to hold her in place. He was-- he wasn’t even licking, he was kissing, wet and filthy and sloppy, his face pressed into her cunt with single-minded enthusiasm. Pulling back for a brief moment to draw in a breath, he returned to lick firmly up to her clit, toying with it with his tongue, and then-- oh god-- sucking. The muscles in her thighs and stomach jerked as she cried out, and she nearly kneed the Doctor in the head.

‘Come now, Peri,’ he mumbled, flicking his eyes up at her. ‘Do try not to injure me, hmm?’

‘Sorry!’ she gasped, the gasp turning into giddy, drunken laughter as he hoisted her thighs up over his shoulders, diving back in with a satisfied hum. The sound vibrated up through her folds, all those wonderful nerve endings crackling and sparking, and her knees crossed behind his head, keeping him firmly in place. His initial surprised mmph! turned into a choked groan, apparently entirely pleased with a little bit of manhandling, and she let one of her hands fall into his frizz of curls, flexing against his scalp.

Behind her, she could feel the pressure of the other Doctor’s erection against her back, and she sighed luxuriantly, head falling back against his shoulder. It might have been easy to think he wasn’t as enthused by proceedings as she and her Doctor, so it was an oddly comforting sensation.

‘Doctor,’ she breathed, high and rough, ‘Ah-- touch me?’

It came out more like a question than she’d meant it to, but the Doctor took the cue regardless. She could feel the press of teeth in his smile against her neck as he muttered an apology, and then his other hand was back at her breast, kneading the weight of it in his hand in a satisfyingly frank, exploratory grope, before returning to toy with her nipple, and she smiled through her harsh, panting breaths.

The Doctor between her legs had found a particular angle that worked especially well, licking hard at one side of her clit, and Peri could feel her orgasm coming, the washing, tingling pleasure building under her skin. It curled in her stomach, her thighs, her arse, tingling maddeningly, and she squeezed her eyes shut hard, purposefully clenching the muscles in her cunt to bring it harder, faster. ‘Uh-huh,’ she whimpered, and then, ‘yeah, god, fuck, fuck, Doctor, Doctor--‘

The younger Doctor shuddered noticeably; pressed all along his front, Peri could feel it, and the damp puff of a harsh breath that broke over her neck.

‘Bite me?’ The words came out ragged and high, and she shook her head a little wildly, enumerating before the elder Doctor could pull away to ask what she wanted. ‘No, no, the-- crickety Doctor, fuck. Bite me? Please? My neck. I just need--‘

There was the briefest of pauses, and then he did, warm wet suction of his mouth at the crook of her neck that turned into teeth, just that little shock of pain buzzing down her spine, tipping her over the edge.

She came, loudly, convulsing between the two of them, arching up as the supernova heat tore through her. In the precise moment of climax, the blissful peaking instant of pleasure, a thought occurred to her; a ridiculous, absurd thought, and she came down shaking with helpless, hysterical laughter.

‘Are you-- quite all right, Peri?’

‘I just,’ she shook her head around her giggles, feeling giddy and stupid after her orgasm. ‘I just thought, when you first met me in Lanzarote--‘ Peri drew a deep breath, trying to suppress the bubble of laughter she could feel hiding in the back of her throat, ‘I was there to meet up with a couple of cute English guys. I never thought--‘ she waved a sloppy hand to encompass the tableau they made, her in between the two of them, and then collapsed back into laughter again.

Slowly, the other two began to laugh as well; behind her, the vibrations deep in the Doctor’s chest shook against her back, and his smile pressed into her shoulder; the other let his face fall against her thigh.

Well,’ said the elder Doctor, on the edge of a chuckle, ‘life does have a way of surprising us.’

Her laughter abating, Peri peered down at him. His always voluminous hair had been turned into a frizzed dandelion puff by her hands in it, and his cheeks and lips were flushed, the whole lower half of his face slick and wet with her juices. Not just that, a brief glance further down showed her, but he was absolutely hard as a rock. The sight of him like that-- flushed and aroused, sticky and soaked as if he’d been eating a summer peach, and grinning, looking simply, warmly happy about it all sent an unexpected aftershock clenching through her.

‘Oh my God, you’re hot like that.’ Impulsively, Peri slid down off the edge of the bed to land clumsily in his lap, kissing him deep and sloppily. Peri never could decide how she felt about the flavour of her own cunt, but it was weirdly satisfying to taste it in someone else’s mouth.

The Doctor hummed into the kiss, returning it with gusto, and grinned at her when they parted.

‘Is it terribly narcissistic of me to agree?’ asked the Doctor still on the bed, sounding faintly bewildered.

‘Possibly,’ the other Doctor shrugged. ‘But at this stage, rather a moot point, I think.’

Peri smirked, twisting in his lap (he whined faintly as her thigh brushed against his erection) to look up at the Doctor. From the floor, she was more or less at eye level with his spread knees, and was struck immediately by how very, very flattering his silly striped trousers were at this angle. Stretched tight across his groin, the stripes delineated with shocking exactitude the hard length of his cock, constrained by the fabric. Peri fancied she could even see the bulge of the head. Her mouth watered.

‘Can I blow you?’

‘Um,’ said the Doctor intelligently, which was, Peri decided, more or less a yes.

She shifted off the other Doctor’s lap to press her face to that long bulge, rubbing her cheek against it once before mouthing lazily up the length of it, sucking through the fabric. The Doctor made a strangled sound like a punch in the stomach, his hands clenching on his knees.

‘Ah, Peri-- ah hah--’

‘Watch this,’ the other Doctor murmured against her hair, before getting up to join his Self on the bed, and quite casually reaching over to pinch one of his nipples. Not a light pinch either, but long and hard and deliberate, digging in with his thumbnail. The younger Doctor all but shouted, a ragged, helpless cry of pleasure that trailed off into a gravelled moan that was, frankly, gorgeous. Peri made a little sound of her own, and the Doctor looked down at her, eyes wide and dark, face hectically flushed and ears bright pink.

‘Wow, Doc,’ she managed. ‘Wouldn’t’ve thought you were the type.’

‘Yes, well,’ he said breathlessly. He didn’t sound embarrassed, only a trifle cross, his eyebrows scrunching together a little in the middle as he threw his Self a dirty look. ‘You could’ve given me some warning.’

‘I hardly think you’ve any room to complain, my dear fellow.’ The elder Doctor threw a significant look down at his crotch, and Peri stifled a smirk, burying her face for a moment against a striped, cottony thigh. The thigh twitched, and the Doctor peered down at her, looking quite overwhelmed.

‘I, uh, think perhaps I’d best save myself for the the main event, as it were. Not that I’m not sure you’re very talented at it, Peri, but, ah-- Anyway,’ he changed the topic with the appearance of some relief, rounding on the other Doctor as Peri sat back on her heels, ‘I thought this was supposed to be about indulging your little sexual peccadilloes, not mine.’

‘Mm,’ the Doctor hummed acquiescence. ‘Fair enough. Would you care to go, ah, kit up, Peri? My dear Self and I can take care of preparations on this end.’

Peri was still a little wobbly when she got to her feet, but after a moment, she felt steady enough to make her way to the ensuite bathroom. Looking over her shoulder with her hand on the bathroom door, she saw both Doctors sitting on the bed with their foreheads pressed together; ‘Contact,’ murmured her Doctor, and they both visibly tensed, sighing soft breaths into each other’s mouths. Peri shivered a little, smiling, and closed the door.

Before they’d gone to fetch the Doctor’s younger self, she’d vetoed a number of dildos from the Doctor’s modest little collection; the double-ended one (‘You know I don’t like penetration, Doctor’), the glittery purple one (‘It’d be like screwing you with a disco!’), the realistic-looking flesh toned one complete with veins and testicles (‘I just couldn’t take it seriously’). She’d ended up with one in plain black rubber with a subtle curve to it, flared at the base to fit into the harness. The harness itself was also black, with a little pocket for a vibe that snugged up against her pubic bone, made out of something the Doctor called smart silicone, which shrunk or stretched as needed to fit perfectly to the wearer’s body. Much more comfortable, he’d said, than any number of straps or buckles.

Sliding the thing on, she had to hold it for a moment before it shrunk down to cling exactly to the contours of her hips and thighs, straps widening apparently of their own accord so as not to cut into the skin. Propping her hands on her hips, she turned to look at herself in the mirror. She was bright-eyed, flushed and dishevelled, but, she thought, trying a wicked little smile out on her reflection, she rather liked the look of herself in the unfussy harness, the dildo jutting proudly between her thighs. She let one hand fall down to fondle it, fingers curling around the length and giving it a few experimental pulls, like she might do if it was a real dick. It didn’t feel like anything, of course, but there was a definite, enjoyable novelty to it.

She re-entered the bedroom just in time to see the Doctor slowly lowering himself onto his Self’s cock. The younger Doctor was laid out flat on the bed, chin pressed down into his neck, eyes screwed shut and mouth slack, breathing in high, panting gasps. Finally, they were both completely naked, and Peri had to take the moment simply to admire the picture they made.

The elder Doctor-- her Doctor-- was sturdy and ruddy-cheeked, strong thick legs braced and trembling on the bed, the pudge of his belly quivering faintly, his dick dark and hard, wet where precome had dripped down the shaft. And under him his Self, flaxen hair strewed about his head, colour high in his cheeks and flushed all the way down to his stomach, skin smooth, nearly hairless where the other Doctor had a chest covered in coarse curls and fuzz all down his legs, fingers digging into the other Doctor’s thighs.

Oh,’ breathed one Doctor dizzily.

There we go,’ murmured the other with satisfaction, as he seated himself fully on his younger Self’s thighs, giving a little wriggle in place as he adjusted to the length inside him. Peri pressed her thighs together. It was a tiny movement, but apparently enough to catch the Doctor’s attention; he lifted his head to look at her, eyes widening as he took in the strap-on, and then smiling. ‘Just in time, my dear. Come join us.’

‘What should I--?’ Peri started to ask, and the Doctor chuckled.

‘Oh, I don’t think I’m quite ready to have that impressive tool of yours in me just yet-- and fetching you do look with it, I must say-- but that’s no reason for you to simply stand and watch until I am.’

The other Doctor finally turned to look at her as well, his eyes flickering open to give her a warm, if rather unfocussed, smile. She returned the smile, leaning over impulsively to kiss him, sucking his lower lip into her mouth and, remembering how he’d reacted to the pinch to his nipple, biting down just enough for it to hurt. He made a satisfying, nasal little nnnh noise, and then, rather cheekily, bit back. Peri laughed, delighted, and slid onto the bed with them.

It was a little awkward at first, sitting down and accounting for the strap-on, but she soon got used to it. Or, more accurate to say, she soon forgot to be bothered about it, what with there being much more interesting things to pay attention to. Idly, she stroked over all the bare skin on display, watching with a certain amount of fascination as the Doctor fucked himself on the other Doctor’s prick, alternating little bounces that made them both groan with slow, circling grinds of his hips.

It didn’t take long before she was no longer content to just sit and watch. She clambered up behind the Doctor, feeling as she did the slick slide of wetness between her thighs, and leaned in so that her breasts pressed against the Doctor’s back, mouth to the nape of his neck. Nosing under his curls, she kissed the skin there, licking, and then sucking hard enough for a hickey. Sure enough, when she drew away, she’d left a little blotch of angry red in her wake. She regarded it with satisfaction, and set to kissing her way down the length of the Doctor’s spine, enjoying the peculiar, alien taste of his skin.

As she did, he leaned forward, falling in degrees until by the time she’d reached the small of his back, he was pressed almost fully down against the younger Doctor’s chest. The position shamelessly displayed his arse, and the flushed root of the other Doctor’s cock where it disappeared into him. Experimentally, Peri ran her hands down the small of his back to give him a good grope, filling her hands with his buttocks and kneading, spreading them in preparation for the further penetration. Muffled against the other Doctor’s chest, he made a soft, pleased little noise that might almost have been a purr, lower back arching to push himself further into her hands. Gratified by this reaction and feeling daring, Peri hunched down to draw her tongue up the underside of the younger Doctor’s cock (he exhaled another one of those ragged whimpers, and a protesting, ‘Peri’) to the damp, flushed skin stretched around it, laving up the length of the cleft of the Doctor’s arse until she reached his lower back.

‘Ready?’ she murmured against the skin.

‘More than,’ he said, vehement and strained. ‘Please.’

Liberally slicking her fingers with lube, she pressed one gently up, sliding it up between the rim of his hole around the other Doctor’s cock. She might have thought it would be an impossible stretch, but the muscle gave easily, almost hungrily, accommodating first one finger and then another, sliding them around the length inside him, giving little aborted strokes to the smooth internal skin. He was much warmer inside than out, and she could feel each individual heartsbeat in a little flutter around her fingers. Her Doctor was silent but for his ragged breathing as she prepared him, but the younger Doctor seemed hardly able to stop his tortured little whimpers and throaty groans, the sounds driven out of him with every crook of her fingers, every clench of the Doctor’s arse.

Peri gave him a little tap on the thigh with her free hand. ‘You all right there?’

‘Fine,’ he assured her desperately. ‘Really rather-- marvellous, in fact, oh, god--‘ He had to pause to gulp as Peri slid in a third finger, fanning them out in a stretch. ‘Do-- do keep going.’

‘I, ah,’ interjected the other Doctor, ‘I think I’m quite prepared, actually.’ He drew a shuddering breath, craning his neck around to look over his shoulder. ‘That is to say, Peri, if you would: fuck me.’

Even in the midst of the breathless, aroused tension that seemed to have fallen down around them, Peri couldn’t hold back her little hiccough of laughter. ‘Yessir.’ She flicked on the little vibrator tucked into the harness, before leaning over to grab the discarded tube with already sticky fingers and squirt a palmful of lube into her hand, slicking the dildo with it. ‘Up a little, would you?’ He’d explained the general theory of the position beforehand (she’d told him that he ought to be teaching the sex ed classes at her old grade school), but this was, as it were, the proof of the pudding.

He pushed himself up on his arms, no longer lying flat on the other Doctor’s chest, but propped up at an angle, and lifted his hips. Not all the way off the other Doctor’s cock, but enough that inches of it slid out, flushed hard and shiny. Peri wiggled her way between the prone Doctor’s spread legs, lined up the tip of the dildo, and slowly pushed her way in, wary of hurting either of them. Just as slowly, the Doctor pushed back, the three of them gradually slotting together like the tumbler of a lock, Peri and the Doctor sliding in and up, and the elder Doctor sinking down onto them until there was no further for any of them to go. Peri’s hand slipped in the sweat covering the Doctor’s stomach.

‘Ohhh,’ he moaned, low and drawn out, his whole body trembling faintly. ‘Ohh, that is-- that is exemplary, that is the-- the consummate-- exquisite, Rassilon, I feel like I could burst.’

‘And that’s good?’

‘Superlatively.’ Still braced in his half-angled position, he shoved himself back and down as best he could, grinding himself onto both of the cocks in him. His breath caught in a little sob, his mouth hanging slack. ‘Oh, emphatically. Prodigiously. Very, very good. Let me just-- move.’

Slowly at first, he lifted himself up a little again, before settling down with a deep, leisurely figure eight grind of his hips. The motion pressed the little vibrator in Peri’s harness against her so firmly and suddenly that she lost her breath for the space of a few heartbeats.

The position didn’t allow for a great deal of movement, nor, given the angles, could both Peri and the other Doctor quite be fully inside him at the same time, but it didn’t really seem to matter. Peri clung to the Doctor with one arm, the other hand braced on the other Doctor’s thigh, and tried to find a rhythm with the younger Doctor; one in, one out, while the Doctor impaled between them sweated and shook, uncharacteristically wordless. Each thrust from Peri or push back from the Doctor ground the little vibrator right up against her clit, a slow-building, maddening internal pleasure, and each breath caught in her throat, tangled with a quiet litany of curses panted against the Doctor’s back.

‘Fuckfuckohshit, oh, fuck...’

The younger Doctor was still making those noises, breathy and broken, and his eyes were huge and shiny and dark as he stared with a curious intensity up at his Self, the hands on his thighs kneading as he fucked up into him.

Between that and his own hand on his cock, the Doctor didn’t last long. He came unceremoniously with a little shudder and a gasp like all the air had been driven out of him, seemingly too stimulated to manage more than that. The muscles of his arse clenched in excruciatingly tight flutters that dragged the other Doctor’s orgasm out of him with a wail, and he jerked up so violently that Peri had to hold onto the Doctor lest she overbalance. The younger Doctor’s cock slid out as he slumped back to the mattress, boneless and panting, but Peri hadn’t come yet. She was close, but not yet. Still, with the Doctor sloppy and loose from having both of them in him, slippery with lubricant and come, it was the easiest thing in the world to get to her knees, to push his head down and just fuck into him, holding onto his hips, with the kind of hard, fast movement that had been impossible before. She wrung the last aftershocks out of him, grinding herself against the little vibrator with every thrust, until her orgasm swept through her, pulsing like a bassline in her bones as she shouted into his back.

‘Well,’ the younger Doctor said eventually. His voice was a little muzzy, but Peri, much to her amusement, recognised the tone as the one he used to use after they’d got themselves embroiled in an unexpected adventure. ‘That was...’

‘Nice?’ Peri suggested, as wryly as she could manage under the circumstances.

The bed shook with his silent laughter. The elder Doctor was too thoroughly shagged out to do anything other than swipe a hand in Peri’s direction and grunt.


After they had said goodbye to the Doctor’s younger Self, all of them washed and dressed and quite free of any outward sign that they were coming off the other end of a threesome, Peri turned to the Doctor, wrinkling her nose. ‘So, he’s really not going to remember any of that?’

‘He is really not going to remember any of that. Not until, well, about… now, actually. Now for me, that is to say.’ His eyebrows went up, expression going a bit distant. ‘It’s a strange thing, remembering something like that from two perspectives at once. Quite enough to give one a headache.’ He shook his head like a dog shaking itself dry, his curls bouncing. ‘Thankfully, the brain has natural defences against such things; the most recent memory soon becomes the dominant one.’

Peri wasn’t about to even start on that, and so persisted on her original train of thought. ‘You mean to say, he’s gonna go back to his TARDIS, with the past version of me, with no idea that he’s going to have sex with my-- er, her future self?’

‘Not a jot. He’ll have a notion that whatever he got up to involved a future version of himself-- there’s a particular temporal signature attached to such events-- and thus he’ll know why he can’t remember whatever it is. And if he has a few mysterious bruises, well...’

The Doctor looked quite pleased with that explanation, his eyes twinkling with amusement, and Peri just shook her head, laughing wryly. ‘Time Lords, I dunno.’ After another moment, a thought occurred to her, and she looked up at the Doctor, eyes narrowing in intrigue. ‘So… since you won’t remember it happening until it’s happened to you in this timeline, is it possible that we might, y’know, with… other versions of you?’

The Doctor’s eyebrows positively leaped. ‘I see I can’t give you an inch, Perpugilliam, or you’re liable to become quite insatiable. No,’ he chuckled, ‘No, I don’t think any of my other past incarnations would be... quite to your taste. Nor you to theirs’, frankly. The only one I can imagine agreeing to such a proposition is my Third-- he did rather get into the whole ethos of the 1970’s, stuck on Earth-- but I daresay he’s too busy with the--’ He ran himself into a sudden halt, the words piling up against the back of his teeth practically audible, and cleared his throat self-consciously.

Peri gave him a look. ‘You daresay he’s too busy with what? Or who?’

Again, the Doctor’s hands went to his lapels, and he gave them a tug, lifting his chin so that he had to look even further down his nose at Peri than usual. ‘Or whom. And a man must have some secrets, mm?’

For a few moments, they engaged in a staring contest, each stubbornly refusing to back down, until Peri relented with a laugh. ‘Oh, fine. But only because I’m particularly pleased with you at the moment.’

The Doctor laughed as well. It was a bright, clear, happy sound that could very easily have been credited to the fact that, having just been rogered quite as thoroughly as he might ever have wished, he was also particularly pleased with Peri. ‘Naturally. I shall have to remember that for the future.’

‘What, you think you can sex me into giving up arguments? As if.’

He affected an expression of affronted shock. ‘Tch! As if I would ever.’

‘Yeah, yeah,’ Peri rolled her eyes good-naturedly at him. ‘Are we going anywhere important? ‘Cuz if we’re not, I’m gonna go take a nap; I’m bushed.’

The Doctor’s smile at that was much smaller, and distinctly fond. ‘We’re not going anywhere terribly important, no. You go sleep. I’ll wake you up as soon as anything exciting happens.’