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What Can Never Be Again

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She was over it.

She was over it.

She was over it.

Scowling into her drink, Ginny repeated those words to herself over and over as she watched the pair across the room. It meant nothing to her. She was happy for them. They made a brilliant couple.

It never ceased to amaze her how the lies came easier the more she repeated them.

Snorting into her glass, she tossed back the last of the Ogden’s and stared at them some more, hoping her face registered peace and happiness rather than disdain and disbelief. She was fairly certain she was failing miserably.

“Didn’t your mother ever mention your face might freeze like that?”

“Sod off, Draco. I’m not in the mood, really.”

One arm snaked around her and pulled her flush against him and she sighed in spite of herself. Her eyes fluttered shut a moment later when his lips touched the pulse point of her neck. “I know you’re scowling too, Draco, even if your face doesn’t show it. You’re no more happy about this turn of events than I am.”

She felt him tense in her arms and knew she’d scored a direct hit. Slightly abashed, she turned in his arms to meet his eyes. Pain was evident there for a second only, replaced almost at once by the semi-amused façade she’d grown accustomed to.

Draco Malfoy, she’d found, used bored, amused and blank facial expressions like some used impediment jinxes. They were his first line of defense; and a rather effective method of keeping most people at bay.

Most people not including her, of course. She’d seen through the bland expressions to the pained and haunted person within. It had been what drew them together as friends, and now lovers. Because she wore the same ones and knew precisely how they felt.

Draco’s eyes left hers to focus somewhere over her head before he stepped away from her. “Bloody hell,” he muttered, low and biting. “Someone needs to tell them about finding a room.”

Knowing she’d hate herself for it, Ginny turned. Harry and Hermione were in much the same position she and Draco had just been, Hermione’s back to Harry’s front. But with one or two subtle differences. Harry’s hand was resting just shy of decent on her stomach. In fact, one wrong shift and he’d find himself with a handful of breast in a room full of people. And unless her eyes were deceiving her, Hermione was moving her hips against his.

On a disgusted sigh, Ginny turned and dropped her empty glass onto a table and muttered to Draco that she needed some air. Air. Ha. What she needed was sex, hard and fast and begging for mercy. But not from Draco. She wouldn’t play make-believe with him. It had been the ground rule since all of their secrets had come tumbling out one drunken evening. If they were nostalgic for what had been, they’d keep it from their bed. Neither of them much cared to be a stand in for what would never be again.

Picking her way through the guests, she opened door after door until she found a room with a small balcony. She wanted sex, yes, but reasoned that a slap of cold air might just cool what watching Harry and Hermione had stirred within her. Her knuckles went white on the railing as her mind played back the scene Draco had pointed out. Harry’s hand just below her breast, Hermione’s hips rocking. Unwittingly, a sigh broke from her lips followed by a rather loud thump.

It took her a second to realise that the thumping noise hadn’t been inside her, but was actually the sound of two bodies hitting the closed door leading to this room. A thump followed by the rattling of the door handle.

“Open the bloody door already, Hermione.”

Ginny panicked.

Harry and Hermione were outside the door, apparently bent on what Draco had mentioned. They’d found themselves a room. This room.

Ginny fumbled in her robes for her wand, set to Disapparate the hell out of here. But she paused with her wand raised. She stared at the door, a part of her wondering. Curious. Perhaps a bit jealous as well. Could it possibly be as good…?

Making her decision, Ginny sprinted across the room to the small louvered cupboard and closed the door with a muffled click. She adjusted the slats of wood and stared into the room, her heart beating a mad tattoo in her chest.

A moment later the door opened and the pair spilled into the room. Harry kicked the door closed with his foot and waved his wand to lock it before stumbling onto the bed, Hermione wrapped around him like a second skin.

“Who knew you were so insatiable, Harry?” Hermione purred, pulling his jumper over his head and leaning forward to place her mouth on his hardened nipples.

“Only for you, Hermione. I want you all the time. Honestly, I don’t think I’ve ever been this randy. One look and all I can think about is being inside you again.” Hermione’s jumper followed Harry’s and his teeth nipped at one distended nipple.

“Merlin yes.” Her sigh died as she set to work on his trousers, pushing them down and off with ease. “Odd. That’s all I can think about as well.” Pause. “Well, not entirely. I think about your tongue, too.”

Harry flipped her over and raised her skirt, not bothering to remove it before settling between her thighs. “Thinking what about my tongue, love?” Ginny watched as his head lowered, burying in her curls.

“Bloodyfuck, Harry,” Hermione groaned, arching into his mouth. “That. Yes. Fuck yes.”

In the closet, Ginny had to bite her lip against the moan. Watching them wasn’t having quite the effect she intended. Rather than satisfying her curiosity, it was making her hot. Making her wet. Her hands were clasped together to the point of pain in order to keep them from herself. As the sounds of Harry feasting on Hermione filled the room, the smell of arousal reached her and the itch between her thighs grew unbearable. On a silent groan, she gave up the battle and slipped a hand under her skirt and ran a single finger along her centre.

Legs like water, she slid to the floor and closed her eyes, listening to them as she ran practised fingers over herself.

“Harry! Harry! I’m coming, don’t stop.”

Ginny bit her lip at Hermione’s cry, driving one finger deep inside, thumb rubbing her own clit almost painfully. Her other hand had found her breast and was pinching her nipple, rolling it.

Ginny’s eyes fluttered open, watching through the louvers as Harry crawled up Hermione’s body, slowing her fingers when Hermione took Harry’s cock and started stroking it. Their voices low, she couldn’t make out the words, but understood well enough when Hermione flipped onto her stomach, arse rising in the air.

“Oh yes,” Harry groaned, hand on his own cock, guiding it into her.

Eyes fixed on them, Ginny pulled her finger out and held it poised, sliding two deep inside as Harry rammed his cock home, fucking herself as Harry pounded into Hermione. Over and over he thrusted, over and over she plunged, watching Harry with his head thrown back, watching Hermione with her breasts swaying at the force of Harry’s thrusts.

Ginny drew her legs up, knees falling to the side in order to get her fingers deeper. Deeper. Harder. Fuck. Twisting her wrist, she stroked the tense tissue and felt orgasm burst through her. She bit her lip hard enough to draw blood as her fingers pumped faster and faster, riding out the wave as Harry and Hermione moaned in the main room.

Weak and spent, Ginny sat with legs splayed in the cupboard listening to the couple dress and kiss and head back out to the party. She righted her jumper and was just getting to her feet when a voice came out of the semidark room.

“You enjoy that, did you?”

Startled, her hand flew to her chest before she relaxed slightly. All she could do was look up as the door opened, showing Draco on the other side of it. She eyed him closely as she calmed the panicked beat of her heart. There wasn’t a hair out of place, his clothes were as pressed and perfect as always, but there was a mad gleam in his eye that he only got when…

One eyebrow raised. “Apparently as much as you did.” She paused, reaching her hand forward to cup him through his trousers. His slight wince and semi-hard state told her she was spot on in her guess. Mouth twisting into a wry grin, she stroked him slowly. “Where were you?”

Eyes rolling in his head, he arched into her fingers. “Behind the draperies. When they disappeared, I started looking for you. Then I came across a locked door. I…ah..” he trailed off and Ginny slowed her hands, wanting to know.

“You..ah…what?” she whispered.

“I was curious. So I Apparated onto the balcony. One look and I almost Disapparated...but I stayed. Call it morbid curiosity.”

Ginny nodded once, taking hold of his hips and pulling her to him. One crushing kiss and he’d backed her against the wall of the cupboard, lifting her slightly to press his cock into her centre.

“I want you, Ginny,” he bit out against her neck as he nibbled on the soft flesh.

Ginny stiffened against him, the flat of her hand pushing him away. “No, you don’t,” she countered, stepping around him. “You want him. Same as I want her. But we can’t have them. Not ever again.”

Draco’s hand reached out for her, then dropped lamely to his side. “It might not be the way we want it, Draco, but it’s the way it is.”

Her eyes raised to his, seeing her pain of loss reflected in his silver eyes. Slowly, she reached into her robes and removed her wand. “I’m going home, Draco. Don’t follow me. We promised when we started never to use each other as props and I’m not going to start now. Come find me when you’re certain it’s me you want.”

A second later, Ginny appeared in her own bedroom and threw herself onto the mattress. Staring at the ceiling, she took in a deep breath and spoke to the empty flat. “And I’ll let you in when I’m certain its you.”