Chapter 1: 1 (NOT EDITED)
You felt nothing. Nothing, but the darkness surrounding you. It was quiet, the way you liked it. Nothing was there to disturb your eternal sleep. There was no light to bother your eye lids and wake you up either. Just the sweet sound of your calm breathing. But despite being alone in the darkness, you couldn’t help hearing a voice that wasn’t there before.
“Yes, continue to sleep…”
Your brow twitched. This was disturbing you. You don’t know how long it’s been since you first fell asleep, but you don’t remember ever hearing this voice before. Not until now.
“Give in to the darkness…”
Despite the unknown voice, the darkness did allow you to sleep without disturbance. But the voice, it bothered you. You didn’t feel the comfort of eternal sleep anymore. Except, fear.
Your heart beat quickened, and you opened your eyes. Darkness surrounded you. You wondered if you opened your eyes at all. But the voice spoke more earnestly now.
“Do you not wish to sleep? Close your eyes, and give in to me.”
You blinked your eyes once. You wanted to sleep, but the voice was bothering you. “Who are you?” You asked the voice.
“You do not remember? No matter. Just go back to your eternal sleep.”
You blinked slowly this time, then closed your eyes. You wondered who that voice belong to. It didn’t strike a memory, if you had any at all. But you wanted to sleep. You wanted to sleep peacefully again. The sweet slumber that was disturbed by the voice.
“Good girl… Sleep peacefully, and give in to me…”
Your breathing calmed again. You nearly drifted off when you felt a presence nearby. Was it the owner of the voice? Your lips parted when you felt a gloved hand to your cheek.
“Shh, sleep your eternal sleep. Remember me as you do so. Let me take over your heart…”
The gloved hand caressed your cheek, and rubbed your bottom lip. You let out a sigh when the hand trailed down your neck and slithered through the valley of your breasts.
“Good girl… Sleep peacefully, and remember me…”
Chapter 2: 2 (NOT EDITED)
You had fallen asleep again. Your peaceful sleep however, was disturbed again. This time, you woke up by familiar hands going down your neck. You shivered at the feel of the large hand gently feeling around your chest. You opened your eyes to the darkness around you. “Who’s there?” You asked.
“Do you still not remember me? How disappointing…”
“You…” You blinked your eyes. You couldn’t see who it was, but the voice from before had spoken to you again. They once again disturbed your sleep. “You woke me up again…”
“Ah yes, I apologize for that. But you see, I can’t have your heart if you don’t remember who I am…”
You sighed and closed your eyes again. Your peaceful sleep will not come to you if the voice continued to pester you. But the way he trailed his hand over your cheek, rubbed their thumb over your bottom lip, and stopped over your chest, made you stay awake for more.
“Remember me, let me into your heart… then you can sleep peacefully again.”
You opened your eyes. You can sleep peacefully again if you gave him your heart. “How?”
“Well, you can start with this…”
A small light flashed for a moment, causing you to cover your eyes. When you looked back, a card appeared and floated before you. “What is this?” You slowly took the card.
“A memory of yours. Go through the world of this memory, and hopefully, you’ll remember me.”
“Is that all?” You asked, staring at the card. You didn’t think much of it, but you were curious of this memory card. You don’t remember much of your past, but you hoped to find the person that owns the voice. “Will I go back to sleep if I go through this?”
“If you can remember me, and my name, I promise to make sure you’ll never wake up again. You will sleep peacefully forever, without hearing, seeing, or feeling anything. An eternal sleep awaits you my dear…”
“Forever sleeping…?” You thought it would be wonderful to sleep without nothing to disturb your slumber again. You nodded with a small smile. “OK, go through this world, remember your name, give you my heart, and you’ll put me to sleep forever?”
A chuckle was heard, sending a shiver through you. You felt hands cup your face, then lips pressed against your forehead. You suddenly felt a stirring inside you. “A gift for you my dear. To use it is up to you, but it’ll help with your mission’s completion. Plus, I’ll be that much closer to your heart.”
You nodded once, looking forward to your eternal slumber. The card in your hand began to glow, before a flashing light blinded your eyes.
Chapter 3: 3 (NOT EDITED)
You found yourself in a white room, holding the memory card in hand. You noticed you were wearing a black cloak with matching gloves and boots. You made a face, but said nothing. At the end of the room, you spotted double doors. You glanced at the card, then walked towards the doors. Before you can reach them however, a black portal appeared in front of you and out came a young man, probably the same age as you, wearing the same clothing.
You stared at his yellow eyes and stoic expression before a small smile played on his lips. “So, you chose to come back after all.”
“What do you mean?” You asked. You don’t remember him, nor did you knew him. But he was in the way of you trying to get back to your eternal sleep. “Who are you?”
“My name is Xehanort. I’ll be keeping an eye on you, watching how you will progress through the world the cards create.” He said as he walked towards you. He stood before you and placed a finger on your chest. “However, you will fail to offer your heart to him.”
You blinked, wondering what he meant. “If I give the voice my heart, I will go back to sleep. I will not fail.” You said determinedly.
He smiled, a small chuckle followed. “We’ll see.” He retrieved his finger. “A word of advice; no matter what happens while you trek through these memories, follow what your heart tells you.”
“Why should I?” You asked with a raised brow. “The reason I’m here, is because I have it in the first place. If I didn’t have it, I wouldn’t have been bothered in the first place.”
“Is that so? Then perhaps you will relinquish your heart.” He smiled in amusement. “But the future is beyond our vision. We don’t know what will happen. Even so, keep my advice in mind.” He stepped away after a quick glance at your lips. “We will meet again, next time with the voice.”
You watched as he disappeared in a portal of darkness and turned your attention to the doors ahead of you. “Follow what my heart tells me huh?” You whispered before going through the doors.
The next you knew, you were surrounded by many seats occupied by others with similar clothing. You blinked as they stared down at you with smirks and scowls. The one sitting at the highest seat smiled triumphantly to your confusion. You looked towards him as he addressed the others.
“Friends, we have here another comrade to our midst. Number 15, (Y/n-X), who has also been chosen by the keyblade.”
“(Y/n-X)…” You whispered to yourself. You glanced around at everyone as they looked down at you with interest and or apathetically. ‘So this is how it began for me…’
Long after your recruitment into the organization, you found yourself following Xemnas towards the chamber of repose. This was the second time he was bringing you to this chamber, which he never brought anyone else. As he walked on without a single glance your way, you took the time to stare at his back and think over what you been through so far.
The leader has taken a large interest in you. His interest was more than he had with Roxas and Xion when they first joined, according to Xigbar and Saix. Despite your lack of memories, you felt feelings stir inside you whenever you were near him. He had noticed this, and often asked you to stay by his side, in case you ‘remembered’ anything of importance. Sadly to say, nothing ever did.
As you went through this world, you realized you were actually following your heart, even acted upon your feelings. This surprised you, since you never meant to follow Xehanort’s advice.
There was a time when you had accomplished a mission, you went around looking for the superior to ‘spend time with him’. Xigbar noticed this, and jumped from the ceiling, landing in front of you. “It’s the new kid, care for a friendly chat?” He grinned.
You stopped and smiled at the man. “Sure, how are you Xigbar?”
“I’m doing fine, but I’m quite curious in where you’re headed off to…” He leaned down to your level with his one eye gleaming mischief. “Looking for Xemnas again?”
You nodded. “I am, have you seen him?”
“Man, you two are addicted to each other.” He chuckled and wrapped an arm around your shoulders. His face was rather close to yours, since you felt his breath on your cheek and lips. “Maybe I have, want me to tell you?”
“Will you? Or are you going to send me off to finish one of your assignments in exchange?” You smiled in amusement.
“As if! Besides, it’s not like you wouldn’t mind helping out a fellow member.” He pulled you closer as he walked with you. “But I’ll tell you, he’s in that chamber again.”
“The chamber of repose? Why?” You blinked in surprise. “I heard there’s nothing in there.”
Xigbar grinned to himself and leaned close to your ear. “Nothing except, maybe a ‘friend’.” You widened your eyes at the news when he placed a finger to your lips. “Keep this between you and me, OK kiddo?”
You smiled. “Promise.” It was when he stopped you before a corridor which Xemnas was walking down from that Xigbar moved away from you. “Be a good girl now!” He disappeared in a dark portal when Xemnas came within ear shot.
“What were you two doing?” He asked, raising a silver brow.
You bowed slightly to him. “I was looking for you Lord Xemnas. Xigbar was only showing me the way.”
“It would be in your best interest to stay away from Xigbar.” The superior stared down at you impassively, before a smile grew. “Come with me.”
You blinked at his words as he turned away and went down the corridor he came from. You quickly followed after him, and entered the chamber he enters by himself.
When he sat at his throne, you stood in front of him and spotted some armor on the ground. “Lord Xemnas, whose is that?”
“They belong to, my ‘friend’.” He replied in a low voice. You were going to ask who this ‘friend’ was when you saw the way he was looking at it. It was as if he was trying to remember something, before he became a nobody.
You held back your question, instead asked, “Why did you bring me here?”
“You wanted to see me.” He answered simply. “I brought you here, to meet my friend.” You glanced at the armor, giving it a curt nod before returning to face Xemnas. He had a satisfied smile on his face. “Now, I know there is something you wanted from me, or wanted to do to me…”
You felt your face heat up, then clenched your fists at your sides. You pursed your lips and closed your eyes. “Lord Xemnas, you told us, the entire organization, that we had no hearts. But, whenever I’m around you, or when I think of you, I can’t help feeling something flutter inside me.” You placed a hand on your chest as you said this. “I want to be around you more. But, it goes against your words and I can’t help but think there’s something you’ve haven’t told us.”
“And what might that be?” He asked, a mocking smile on his face now.
You opened your eyes to his. “I don’t know, but I’m eager for something. To do something. I don’t know what it means, or why exactly I want it, but it involves you Lord Xemnas.”
“Show me what this something is, (Y/n-X).” He commanded.
You nodded and walked towards him on his throne. He stared at your face as you placed your hands over his and brought face closer to his. He closed his eyes when your lips connected with his in a gentle passion.
Once again standing beside Xemnas in the chamber of repose, you watched him walk towards the center of the room and turned to face you. There was a gleam in his eye, something you never noticed before. He slowly pointed to the throne. “Sit there, (Y/n-X).”
You blinked at his command, but did as told. You laid your hands on the armrests and looked up at your superior. He smiled down at you. “Do you remember your original goal?”
“My… goal?” You blinked in confusion, to his amusement.
He came closer and leaned down to your level. He gazed at you with sultry eyes, causing your insides to flutter. He brought a hand to your cheek, rubbing his thumb over your bottom lip, then trailing the limb down your neck to your chest. “The reason you are here, do you not remember?”
The way he fondled with your left breast through your cloak reminded you of something. Your eyes widened. “The voice… my heart…”
“Indeed.” He grinned and retrieved his limb. You were still in a daze as your remembered your original goal when he laid both his hands over yours. “Don’t forget your mission, (Y/n-X). Don’t forget to remember. Now, do you remember his name?”
You pursed your lips. “No, I don’t.”
“As expected.” He closed his eyes for moment in thought, before opening his eyes again. “Then you must continue forth.”
You blinked. “What? What about-”
He gave you a look, silencing you. “Your heart doesn’t belong to me. It belongs to him. Won’t you promise to remember him for me, (Y/n-X)?”
You frowned a little, but then nodded. “Yes, Lord Xemnas, I promise.”
“Good.” He smiled. You held back a sigh and closed your eyes when he kissed you. He kissed you in the same passion as you did to him before. When he moved away, your consciousness was already fading away. “See you soon, (Y/n-X).”
Chapter 4: 4 (NOT EDITED)
“Welcome back.” Said a familiar voice.
You gasped when you opened your eyes, and jumped to your feet. There standing some feet away from you was Xehanort, and another male you never seen before. The 2 had similarities, silver hair and yellow eyes. Though the other was larger in build, different in clothing and had something over his chest. You made a face as he stared at you with his arms crossed.
Xehanort blinked slowly. “So you have went through a memory of your past. You were there a lot longer than anticipated. What did you think?”
You looked down, and placed a hand to your heart. “There are things I don’t understand… Like the key blade… And what Lord Xemnas, from my memory, told me. He said I had no heart. I wondered, how can that be, if what I felt about him, felt real.”
“So you kept my advice in mind…” Xehanort smiled a little. “Yes, I know he said that.”
You shook your head, clenching a fist to your side. You remembered your original goal. You stood in the world of the card for a long while, that you forgotten the reason you were here in the first place. “But, if I’m a nobody, with no heart, how can I accomplish my mission?”
“Quite the puzzle, but there is a way.” The other said with a smile. “It’s simple.”
You turned to him, narrowing your brow. Something about his voice bothered you. You blinked. “You!”
He grinned as Xehanort held up a hand to stop you. “Have you remembered his name?”
You shook your head. “No. What is your name?” You asked him.
“Accomplish your mission, and you’ll remember me.” He smiled and walked towards you. You stared into his eyes as he stood before you and placed a gloved hand to your cheek. “But first, you will need darkness inside you.”
You made a face as Xehanort moved behind you. “What do you mean?”
He smirked and took hold of the zipper of your cloak. Your eyes widened when he pulled it to expose your body underneath. “Remember my gift? Apparently it didn’t enter you the way I expected it. I decided to take desperate measures.”
Xehanort held your arms behind your back as the other fully exposed you. You shivered and your breathing became irregular. “What-?”
“Do not worry, think of it as a way for me to better get a hold of the heart you will soon give to me.” He grinned and trailed a hand down your bare skin. “Surrender to me, (Y/n-X).”
You gasped when you felt Xehanort’s lips on the back of your neck and watched the man in front of you reveal what he had hidden in his pants.
You moaned out loud when he entered you. The odd feeling of something inside you made you curl your toes and meet his thrust. The man shuddered and sighed in his own pleasure has he held your hips. Xehanort kept you steady against him, while teasing your neck with his tongue. The way he trailed his wet organ over your skin made you cry out at the feeling spreading through you. The feeling was new to you, but it felt so good.
“Give yourself to me, (Y/n-X).” The man grunted while moving in and out of you. You wrapped your legs around him, wanting him deeper within you. If this is what he meant about having darkness inside you, you were more than eager to welcome these sensations.
The both of them had lowered you to the ground, laying you on your back. Xehanort held your wrists above your head as he watched with lingering arousal at how wide your mouth was. You panted and moaned as the man continued to pound his hips against yours, every so often trailing his tongue from your neck to your left breast.
Something was building inside you. You pulled on your wrists, hoping to hold unto the man. You opened your eyes and stared into Xehanort’s eyes. He was smirking, enjoying himself holding you back from wanting to hold him. With a small chuckle, he leaned down and licked around your dry lips, teasing you once again.
In your daze, you heard him grunt and thrust into you one last time before you felt something else stir within your core. You moaned out in pleasure and pain at the weird feeling. You felt your consciousness fading again.
You felt lips at the corner of your mouth as you panted on the ground. With whatever vision you had left, you found Xehanort moving away from you. He held up another familiar card in your face, before placing it in your hand. “Don’t forget to remember, (Y/n-X).”
The man pulled out of you, smiling after what he did to you. You turned to him next as he got to his feet. He stood above you, looking over your sweaty body. “Remember me, (Y/n-x), and give in to the darkness.”
That was all you heard before your vision faded to black.
Chapter 5: 5 (NOT EDITED)
You sat on Xigbar’s bed, spreading your legs when he came close. His eye was gleaming mysteriously as he stood before you. His smirk was sending shivers through you before he leaned down to your level. “Say, do you remember anything else about your mission?”
“No, but you said you’ll have your way with me if I answered you with a piece of it.” You frowned and held his coat.
He grinned and placed a gloved hand to your cheek. The feeling was familiar as he rubbed your bottom lip, trailed it down your neck and stopped over your chest. This caused you to fall into a daze and reminisce of what’s happened so far in this memory.
“Guess I got to remind you huh?” He whispered before pulling on your coat zipper.
You were heading towards the lobby when you spotted Xigbar lounging on a couch. You parted your lips at the sight of him. You have grown to enjoy the man’s presence during your time in the organization. Especially since he was always there for a chat whenever you felt down about something.
He glanced your way with a smirk. “Hey kiddo! Just woke up?”
You nodded, walking towards him after sending a nod in greeting to Zexion, who was also relaxing in the lobby. “Yeah, I thought I’d wake up sooner though…” You frowned as you sat beside him. “I hope Saïx won’t be angry with me like he was with Xion.”
“Oh! So you heard about that?” Xigbar raised his brow in surprise. He was grinning in amusement. “Guess I’m not the only one that eavesdrop, eh Zexion?”
Zexion came out of his thoughts and gave him a look. “You say it as if I’ve done such a thing in the past.” He then looked at you. “You shouldn’t take after Xigbar, he’s a bad role model.”
You giggled as Xigbar stretched his arms over the couch. “As if! What makes you think I’m a bad role model?”
“I don’t have time to list things…” Zexion shook his head before he furrowed his brow. “However, (Y/n-X), there is something different about you…”
You blinked as Xigbar raised a brow. “What do you mean?” You asked while Xigbar almost leaned in to hear what he had to say.
Zexion closed his eyes and took a good whiff of the air around him. “Not that you weren’t part of the darkness before, but somehow you’ve received a boost of it. It’s interesting since you’re one of the lights in the organization, yet you’re shrouded in darkness…”
You frowned in confusion before Xigbar playfully wrapped an arm around your shoulders. “So what? It doesn’t change who she is. Right?” He smiled your way.
You smiled in return and nodded. “Right.”
Zexion hummed with his fingers wrapped around his chin in thought. “I just thought I should mention it. Well then, I must return to my duties. It was good to see you, (Y/n-X). Don’t procrastinate now.” He said as he left the lounge.
Xigbar muttered his usual saying before spotting Saïx coming down a corridor. You gulped, leaning into Xigbar as number 7 entered the lounge. “About time you woke up, (Y/n-X). You have a mission to do.”
You nodded to the man, huddling closer to number 2 to his amusement. “Yes.”
Saïx scowled before Xigbar smiled at him. “Hey, she’s coming with me on my mission. I was just waiting on her.” He turned to you with a teasing smile. “You ready now (Y/n-X)?”
“Y-Yeah, let’s go.” You nodded quickly and stood up with him.
Xigbar chuckled and opened a portal. He grinned at Saïx over his shoulder. ”Don’t miss us too much.”
Saïx’s scowl deepened as we disappeared into the darkness.
Your mission was to travel to traverse town and defeat any heartless that had appeared. As you finished your mission, you took a glance at your keyblade. The very weapon was white, but was clouded with a darkness that wasn’t there before.
Xigbar noticed this from over a building and smirked in an all knowing manner. His weapons disappeared and he quickly appeared beside you. “Well would you look at this…”
You blinked at him as he looked over your weapon. “Xigbar.”
“You know, he really did take desperate measures…” Xigbar rubbed his chin then poked your keyblade. “Its barely a key of light anymore.”
“What do you mean?” You asked, looking at your dark keyblade.
He grinned. “Don’t you remember? It became like that after he had ‘his way’ with you. I heard you enjoyed it too.”
“His way with me?” You frowned in confusion. “Who’s ‘he’?”
“Man, you really don’t remember. How are you suppose to fulfill your promise if you don’t…?” He shook his head.
You pouted, placing away your keyblade. You knew Xigbar had a knack for eavesdropping. You thought you could learn a few things from him, and hopefully ask if he had the same feelings for you as you had for him. After all, now was a good time to ask since possibly you’re the only ones around.
“Xigbar, can I ask you something?” You asked, standing closer to him. You placed a hand on his hip as you said this.
He hummed and looked down at you. “What?”
“When I see you, my insides start to feel weird. I can’t exactly explain it, but when I look at you, and hear your voice, I can’t help but smile and want to hear more from you.” You stared into his eye as he smiled a small smile. “What is this feeling?”
“Can’t say I have an answer to that since we nobodies don’t have a heart to understand what it is to ‘feel’.” He answered, patting you on the head.
You looked down to his chest, taking in his answer. You then remembered what he said about a man ‘having his way’ with you. You wondered what that meant, but the words made you shudder, in a good way. You glanced at his smiling face again. “Xigbar, won’t you… have your way with me?”
He grinned widely to your surprise. “Sure, if you can answer my question…”
“What is it?” You asked, holding onto his hips, pulling him closer.
He smirked. “Can you remember anything of your mission? I’ll even accept a piece of it. Answer me that, then I’ll have my way with you.”
You almost gasped at his words and a shiver went through you. This familiar shiver had a memory flicker in the back of your mind. You tried desperately to remember as you tightened your hold on him.
Xigbar was grinning in amusement at your face as you tried to remember. He opened his mouth to say something when you looked up from his chest. “My heart! Something about, my heart?” You stared at him, hoping he would accept it.
He chuckled and wrapped an arm around you. “Let’s go to my room.”
After Xigbar had pulled the zipper, completely exposing your bare chest, he took a moment to stare at you with a familiar look. Your breathing quickened from the way he looked at you, and you reached up to cover yourself.
He smirked before pulling on his zipper. Your eyes widened at his well toned muscles as he pulled down his bottoms as well. You blinked at what was hidden in his bulging pants and pulled your legs together. “Be a good girl now…” He whispered and pulled apart your legs.
“But, what is-?” You stared with wide eyes as he pulled you closer to him. He brushed the top of it over your lower region and a weird feeling began to erupt from you. You bit your lip and bucked your hips to feel more of him.
He grinned when you became slick enough and tightened his hold on your waist before sliding inside. You gasped and sat up to hug his abdomen. He let out a sigh, almost in relief from being inside you. He hugged your small form, enjoying the feel of your warmth around him.
You panted and moved your hips for him to move as well. He chuckled and slid out, only to slide back in. You moaned in the back of your throat as he continued to do this in a slow, steady pace. You bucked your hips as best you could for him go deeper, and faster.
Xigbar bit his lip and picked you up. He laid you beneath him on the bed and thrust himself deeper within you. You closed your eyes and moaned out loud as he quickened his pace. You held each other tighter as the pleasure coursing through you both clouded your minds. Xigbar kissed the corner of your lips before footsteps were heard outside his room.
You opened your eyes when you blinked at the change of scenery. He was now having his way with you on the ceiling, just above the door. You held back a moan and whimpered when he went at a slow pace.
He grinned as he teased you. “Shh, not a sound.”
You pouted and was about to mention how that was impossible when his door room opened. Your eyes bulged and your mouth closed instantly, you even felt like your world stopped as you stared at some familiar silver hair. Xigbar grinned as he held back a laugh at how you stared at the superior and focused on giving you love bites on your neck.
The way he moved more deeply inside you while the superior looked inside the room made it harder for you to hold back a moan. You wanted to whimper so badly, that you clenched your fists against Xigbar’s back.
“Hmm, he isn’t here.” The deep voice of the superior reached your ears before the man left the room.
Xigbar quickened his pace as you both neared your climaxes. He sucked at your neck and chuckled against your skin. “That was close, huh (Y/n-X)?” He grunted as he came inside you.
You moaned out once more as you shuddered in pleasure. “Too close…” You whispered and kissed his lips when he turned to you. You both panted as you stared into each other’s eyes before you noticed your vision fading. “Xigbar…”
Xigbar smiled and kissed your lips. “His name starts with an ‘A’. Don’t forget that, (Y/n-X).”
You hoped you wouldn’t, as you fell into the darkness.
Chapter 6: 6 (NOT EDITED)
You once again appeared in the familiar white room. This time, only Xehanort welcomed you back from the memory world. You held your head and stood up from the ground. You wondered why you’ve been ending up on the floor after going through each world.
Xehanort stared at you impassively. “Hopefully you returned with some progress…”
You looked back into his eyes. ”Honestly, I’m more confused. My memories so far shown me that I’m a nobody with no heart. I have no heart to give to the voice. But, I have felt feelings inside me. Do I not have a heart? Or has the organization lied to me?”
Xehanort slowly blinked with a small smile. “You’ll see for yourself. For now, what do you know of the voice?”
“His name… It starts with an ‘A’ right?” You tilt your head.
He nodded. “Yes. Is that all?”
You crossed your arms. “Other than that and the fact that he woke me up for my heart… also…” You thought back about your keyblade, and what Zexion had said in your memory. “When that man, had his way with me, he applied more darkness inside me…” You nearly blushed at your own words.
Xehanort chuckled. “He did, but somehow it didn’t take over you completely.” He slowly pointed to you. “Your keyblade still holds some light left.”
You blinked before summoning your keyblade. As before, it was white but shrouded by a dark mist. The blade however still glowed a sort of holy light. “Why is that…?”
Xehanort lowered his arm. His expression was stoic. “Are you certain you want to finish your mission?” He asked after you placed away the blade.
You looked down in thought. After going through these memories, you felt the urge to know more of your past, of the members of the organization. Would giving away your heart mean that you would forget what you been through? What you felt about lord Xemnas and Xigbar?
Xehanort sighed and held up another memory card. “I see you need some thinking to do.”
You caught the card when he tossed it to you and looked at it. It was another picture of the world that never was. You looked back at Xehanort. “Xehanort, was it? I didn’t care before, but now I’m curious. What does the voice intend to do with my heart?”
“What matters is what you want to do. Did you not want to go into an eternal slumber?” Xehanort asked.
“Yes but, I don’t know…” You furrowed your browser in thought. You wanted to sleep, but then you entered your memories and lived through them for a while. They felt real, felt good. It surprised you that you wanted to be near people again after so long.
Xehanort shook his head. “Do you at least remember your promise?”
You nodded for a moment, then furrow your brow. “How exactly do I give him my heart?”
“Just open your heart to the darkness. Allow it to take over you, that’s all.” Xehanort answered simply as he walked towards you. You held his gaze when he lightly kissed your lips. “That’s when you have given him your heart.”
You looked down to his lips and held unto his sleeve. “Will I see the voice again next time?”
He nodded and allowed you to kiss him back. “You will. Just remember, these are just memories locked away in your heart. They’re not exactly real.”
You nodded, closing your eyes. Your vision was blurring and you felt wobbly on your feet. Xehanort kissed your head before moving away. “I suppose we’ll talk about this later.”
You nodded again as the card in your hand flashed brightly.
Chapter 7: 7 (NE)
You found yourself on a mission with Xaldin, looking over the beast's castle. He stood beside you quietly, eyeing the grounds as the beast ran back into his castle.
You held your hands behind your back, mimicking Xaldin. You were nervous, since this nobody wasn't as pleasant to be with. He was strict, not allowing you to take breaks while training with him. Earlier, he had you scout the entire castle and learn every nook and cranny of the place by memory. It was annoying, exhausting, and most of all, unrelated to your mission! Though you had to say, he had a knack for exploiting our opponents weakness. Possibly he needed the castle's interior for something. Still, you didn't see how it was going to help you.
Xaldin turned to you, violet eyes watching you callously. "Now then, lure Belle out of the castle. She will prove well as bait for the beast, as I find the rose."
"Um, shouldn't we leave Belle alone? I mean, we're only here for the beast and-" You whimpered when he punched the wall behind you.
To be honest, while you scouted the castle earlier, you had heard the captive girl a few times and listened to her sing. Her voice was beautiful, and she was a fair maiden. She sounded so kind, it made your chest warm. You felt she should be left out. After all, the mission was to turn beast into a heartless.
When you had mentioned this to Xaldin however, he glared harshly, saying I shouldn't be taken with those of emotion. Like now. "What did I tell you about 'feeling'?"
"To not to? But, we're here for the beast righ-?" He roughly kissed you, holding your neck in place. The action didn't surprised you, it wasn't the first time he's done this out of anger. Whenever you didn't do as told, he brutally grab you by the neck or arm, and kiss you into submission.
This started happening when you first started taking missions with him, after learning more in depth about the beast. The girl was kept prisoner here, although there is hope she'll fall in love with him, and break the castle's curse. Xaldin thought it was a waste of time, and dismissed the subject about love. You thought it was sweet, thinking love was needed to have a heart. Xaldin however, thought differently, and decided to force 'love' upon you, so you can learn to hate it.
Apparently, it had the opposite affect on you. You enjoyed his aggressiveness, his eager kisses for dominance. You tried returning them at one point, but he pushed away, threatening to never mention it again. you never mentioned it, but he has failed to keep his lips to himself.
You pushed against his broad chest, as he moved his tongue along yours. You wanted to breath, but he refused to grant you that. When he was satisfied, he broke away and held your face close. "What did I say?"
"I-I'll go." You replied quickly, still taking deep breaths. For someone who was contempt of beings with emotion, he sure knew how to convey them through his kisses. When he let you go, you immediately disappeared from his sight.
You reappeared in a deserted hallway, hearing conversation behind the door before you. You heard Belle's sweet voice, and a small one, belonging to the child teacup you kidnapped before. You 'felt' bad about it, but at least beast brought him back. You summoned some heartless, commanding them to invade the room and chase Belle through the castle. You hid around a corner afterwards, then waited. You had an idea. A crash was heard, then Belle's startled yelp. You braced yourself, and watched as Belle ran out the room with the teacup child in her hands. 'Mission accomplished', you thought with a smile.
Xaldin glanced at you when you returned from your errand. From the looks of it, he has yet to leave his spot. Was he not suppose to grab the rose? "Belle is running through the castle now. Where's the beast?"
"He's still beside the rose. Are you sure Belle is running around?" He asked, raising a thick brow. You last saw her being chased by the heartless you summoned, so you assumed so. He sighed annoyingly. "Who, or what, does he love more?"
"I think, he loves Belle more." You mentioned from behind him. The relationship between the two proved as much, though she had yet to admit it. You heard, and learned, that love was a powerful emotion. You hoped, once you regained your heart, you could feel what love felt like.
"I see, there she is." Xaldin spotted Belle through the large windows. She was still being chased by heartless. You followed his gaze when he glanced at the beast, who noticed the commotion, and left the rose by itself. "Perfect, stay here."
You sighed after he left, crossing your arms. 'Well, at least I can take a break...' He had you running around the entire mission, while he stood over the roofs. You even forgotten the reason why you were brought along in the first place. Though a part of you didn't mind it. You liked him, you found him interesting. From the small moments, to the longer ones, you enjoyed and admired him from close and afar.
When you returned to base, and gave in your report, you roamed the halls to find your room. You stretched your limbs, then noticed Xaldin coming down the corridor. You shivered at the look he gave you, and stopped when he approached you. You wanted to ask him something. "Xaldin, I understand we have to turn beast into a heartless, but what does Belle have to do with anything? Shouldn't we focus on the rose?"
Xaldin gave you a look, as if he couldn't believe the stupidity in your veins. "(Y/n)-X, are you, 'feeling' sympathy for Belle?"
You frowned, wondering if it was true. You 'felt' she should be left out. When you said nothing, Xaldin took hold of your neck. "The reason is, and you said so yourself, the beast 'loves' Belle. We can use her against him, that is one of his weaknesses, besides the rose. Don't question the way I do things, (Y/n)-X. Just do as you're told."
When you nodded, he gave a thoughtful hum, then kissed you again. You nearly sighed into the kiss, pressing your hands against his chest. Honestly, you didn't mind him doing this, but his actions contradict his words. As his lips moved in sync with yours, you found yourself cupping his face for more. During your time in the organization, you wanted to learn and spend more time with him. Sure you had no idea what this meant, since you had no heart. But the looks he gave you, the glares when you mentioned love, and the moments when you shared your thoughts on 'feeling', he would convey emotions that weren't like a nobody. You assumed, love was taking it's course.
He hugged you closer, bringing an arm around your lower back. You wrapped your arms around his neck, returning the same passion he pouring into you. However...
Xaldin pushed you away with a growl, and you landed on your butt. "Ow!"
"Tch, we can't do this... we're nobodies..." He grumbled, his eyes looking elsewhere. You rubbed your bottom when his next words brought a memory to mind. "Your heart belongs to him."
'Him?' Your eyes stared off as you began to recall your original goal. To give your heart to the voice. You needed to know his name. You stood and faced Xaldin. "Xaldin, who is this 'him'?"
"Hmm? You don't know?" This irked you. Of course you didn't. He shook his head. "I can not say. Only you know him, (Y/n)-X."
"If I did I wouldn't-" You felt dizzy all of a sudden, your vision turned blurry. You wobbled on your feet, and held your head. Was this the end of your memory?
Xaldin took hold of you when you lost balance. He stared you down as you slowly lost consciousness. He glared in despair. "I can not give you my heart, no matter how much I want to."