Chapter 1: Panic
Eren stretched as he waited for the light to turn red. It was early March, the frost was hanging onto the morning but spring was starting to break through. Eren was still cold though, as he pulled his parker closer. The coffee in his hand was warming his fingers, something he was very grateful for, having forgotten his gloves at home.
Thankfully the walk work wasn’t far from his apartment block. Nobody was really about this early in the morning, it was half seven and still mostly dark. The streetlights still illuminating the world. The was something eerie about being awake when nobody else was.
Not as eerie as his previous life though. Eren shuddered and took a sip of his coffee.
Blood flying, riding until your horse either slipped or you made it to safety. Huge naked people eating little clothed people. Titan, he knew they were called. He just didn’t really want to think about them. That was over now. He’d been reincarnated. He was safe.
The light flash red, the green man announcing he could make his way across the street.
Eren started to walk across, a yawn escaping him.
The screech of tires trying to grip tarmac sounded loudly in his ears. Eren turned towards the noise. His legs frozen to the spot. The car was going way too fast to stop, its wheels spinning on black ice. It was too close. Eren tried to jump out the way but it was too late.
The bonnet of the car collided with Eren’s legs, his coffee flying into the air as he hit the windshield and carried on over the car.
He’d heard that it was better to go over the bonnet than under the wheels, he thought to himself as he flew through the air.
His body crashed into the cold, hard tarmac. His head slamming down as the world went black.
Eren’s head felt foggy, his eyes felt as if they were glued shut, his body unmoving. He forced his eyes to open, the light invading and making him close them immediately. He tried to remember what happened, he was making his way to work like he usually did, the was a loud sound and….he’d been hit by a car.
Eren blinked away the fog and forced his eyes open once more. The light from the open window was too bright in the dim room. Eren felt the bed under him, it was hard and the sheets felt gritty. Was he in the hospital?
He blinked again and fully opened his eyes, taking in his surroundings.
The room had dark walls, it smelled like wet stone and dust. The bed was small, the sheets scratchy. There was no sound of hospital machines or nurses running around. The air was stale.
Eren jolted up in the bed. This wasn’t a hospital. It was a dungeon.
“That’s no right.” Eren said he himself as he flexed his arm. This body felt completely normal. Not like he’d been hot by a car at all. What the hell was going on?
Eren’s heart sped up, his throat was dry, his palm sweaty. This couldn’t be real. This had to be a dream. He recognised this place. It was his old room in the survey corps. The evidence lay on the chair across the room, painstakingly folded to the corporal’s standards.
Eren got up and walked across the room, he picked up the jacket gently, as if it would turn to dust. He breathed heavily.
“Oi, Brat. It’s time for you chores, get fuckin’ dressed.” The deep voice came from behind Eren. He spun, the jacket clutched to his chest.
Levi stood in the doorway, the light coming in from behind his. His arms were folded as he leaned against the doorway with a bored expression on his face. His lips twitched in annoyance.
“Well. Are you just going to stand there.”
“I’m dreaming.” Eren breathed. “This is a dream.”
Levi quirked an eyebrow at that. “Your dreams must be pretty shit if all you do is stand in your cell.” He pushed himself off the wall and stood straight. “Get dressed, I don’t have time for this shit. You’ll miss breakfast and I sure as hell ain’t saving any for you.”
Eren’s breath was harsh. His grip on his jacket was almost ripping the material.
“This is a dream.” Eren said more adamantly. His breathing was coming out in fast, shallow pants. His eyes were blown wide and he was sweating all over.
Levi frowned. Eren didn’t look like his normal self. “what’s the matter with you, going to shit yourself?”
Eren couldn’t think. He dropped the jacket in favour of digging his nails into his palms. Levi’s nostrils flared as he stepped forwards in a second, forcing Eren to open his hands. Perfect moon shapes started to seep blood.
“What the fuck are you trying to do?” Levi growled.
The grip on Eren was tight, bruising. “This isn’t real. This can’t be real. I shouldn’t be here!” Eren screamed, struggling to free himself from Levi’s grip in his panic.
Levi’s eyes widened. He shouted for Hanji as loud as he could as Eren started to struggle more. His breathing was faster than ever. Tears had started to pour down his face.
Eren slumped in Levi’s hold, the smaller of the two holding him up as he went limp. Eren’s eyes were closed, his breathing shallow.
He’d passed out.
Chapter 2: Chapter 2
Drifting, Eren was drifting in and out of consciousness. He felt as he was moved he once again lie on bed in his cell. He didn’t open his eyes, he couldn’t, the longer he had them shut the more chance he felt as if he’d wake up, wake up in his warm comfy bed at home and not in this nightmare.
“You took your time.” Levi’s said from somewhere across the room.
“I had to bring all my equipment!” Hanji exclaimed. “Now, what do we have here?”
Eren felt the bed dip slightly. Eren’s breathing was still calm, as if he was sleeping. He felt like he was waking but he still couldn’t move his body or open his eyes.
“Hell if I know. He just started screaming about a dream.” Levi said impassively. He looked down at his nailed and ‘tched’ at the small traces of blood from taking Eren’s hands earlier. “Maybe the brat had a nightmare.”
Hanji chucked. “What could be so scary that it’d effect a titan shifter?” Hanji shinned a light into Eren’s eyes. “Well, he seems okay.” She checked his heartbeat. “I think he just had a panic attack.”
“Just? Are we forgetting this little shit can turn into a titan? His little panic attack could take down the whole castle.”
“But it didn’t. If you ask me, you’re the one more freaked out.” Hanji grinned.
Levi raised his lip into a sneer and rolled his eyes. “Just tell me he’s not going to die so I can go get some breakfast.”
Hanji smiled knowingly and waved her hand for him to leave. She turned back to Eren, cleaning the little indents that he’s made in his hands. She noticed that they hadn’t started to heal. She took note of that.
Eren opened his eyes, Hanji giving him a small smile. “I thought you were awake. Waited for the short, angry one to leave it seems.”
Eren didn’t say anything. All he did was take in Hanji’s face. He hadn’t seen her in such a long time but he hadn’t forgotten the special glint she got in her eyes when she was insulting Levi, or planning something.
“So, want to tell me what that was all about?” She asked.
Eren bit his lip. Should he tell her? That he was from the future or that this was just a dream brought on by a coma? Eren took a deep breath and stilled himself. “Sorry, I had a bad dream. Wasn’t quite awake yet.” He lied.
Hanji nodded. “Happens to the best of us. Well you better get dressed and get to the mess hall.” Hanji said as she packed up her things and started to move out the room, she turned to Eren as she was about to leave. “If you ever want to talk about it…”
Eren swung his legs over the bed, leaning his elbows on his knees, he put his face in his hands and exhaled harshly.
“Okay, okay. I’m fine. This is fine.” Eren said he himself as he tried to calm his speeding heart. “everything will be okay.” But it won’t. He’d somehow landed himself in the past. He bit the inside of his cheek.
This was some Doctor Who, Reincarnation, Time travel- shit. What was he, a protagonist in some weirdass anime? Eren laughed to himself. He got up from his bed and walked over to his desk. His jacket had been refolded and placed neatly on top of the rest of his clothes.
He pulled off his nightclothes and started to put on the familiar uniform. He looked down at his body as he did so. He was in much better shape than his other self. He ran a hand down his stomach and clenched his teeth. It felt real. Much more real than any dream he’s ever had. This was different. This was real.
He pulled his shirt over his head, pulling on his trousers next. He held his harness in his hands, looking over the complicated piece of equipment.
“How the fuck did this work?” He asked himself as he struggled into it. After a couple of failed attempts, he finally managed it with a huff.
He pulled on his boots last and faced the mirror. It was like seeing a ghost. He turned, never letting his eyes leave this mirror.
He raised a hand to his face and felt the supple flesh. He was younger, that was for sure. He looked to be about 17, he thought. He was currently 25 in the other world. Or in the future, training to be a doctor was tiring, that was for sure but his 17 year old self looked more tired than he’d ever been.
He drew his eyes away from his reflection and made his way out his cell. Thankfully he remembered the way to the Mess hall. That would have been one conversation he didn’t want to have.
He had decided that he wouldn’t tell anyone what was going on, he’d pretend to be 17 year old Eren, titan shifter. He’s hide his knowledge of the future. He’d seen enough time travel programs to know that changing things never went well. For all he knew he could end up saying the wrong thing and bring the titans back to his future.
That’s something he couldn’t let happen.
“Eren! Where have you been?” His dark haired adopted sister stood in front of him. Her face stern.
“Sorry, Mikasa. I overslept.” He smiled. It was nice to see a familiar face from his future, although she was a lot younger.
The future Mikasa was a lawyer that lived on his street growing up. She’d been one of his mother’s ‘friends’ what he didn’t know at the time was that they both had their past memories. When his parents had died in a hit and run, she’d taken him in. Swooped in on the wake, where his family was fighting over who’d be taking him…and his huge inheritance. She’s slammed the document that proved she was his legal guardian down on the table and pulled him into a crushing hug. He was eight at the time.
“You’ll be scolded. Come on, I saved you breakfast.”
“Thanks, Mikasa.” She pulled him over to the table and sat him down, taking the spot on his left. Eren looked down at his less than appetising breakfast. Watery porridge and bread. Mikasa passed him a few berries with a conspirator’s look. Eren smiled and looked up as the person across from him sat down.
Blood dripped from the teens mouth, his screams silent. Eren wasn’t even sure if he was alive at this point but the twitching of his sword made him think otherwise. The titan had a tight grip on his middle, crushing the bones in its grasp. Eren tried to shout for help, he reached out a hand, went to bite his hand. Jean’s sword dropped from his grasp as his body went slack. The titan swallowed him in one gulp.
Eren raised a hand to his mouth to stop the bile from leaving. He swallowed hard, burning his throat. His eyes watered slightly from the strain as he refused to look at Jean. He reached for his water and took grateful gulps.
“What’s with you? You sick or something?” Jean asked as he shoved porridge into his mouth.
Eren picked up his spoon and gave Jean a weak smile. “Just seeing your face is enough to make me sick.”
“what did you say you….” Jean stopped his shout as Mikasa glared daggers at him.
“If you’re feeling ill you should sit todays training out.” Mikasa suggested.
“Can I have your food if you’re feeling sick?” Sasha asked as she went to reach for his bowl. Mikasa slapped her hand away.
The flashes started again, as he watched Sasha face. In the back on his mind he could see her face being gripped by a small titan as it put its fat fingers into her mouth and ripped her jaw apart.
“You look really pale, Eren.” Connie said as he reached a hand over to touch Eren’s head.
Eren couldn’t help his reaction as he sprung from his seat. He didn’t see Connie’s face. All he could see was the half-decomposed body of his friend, that they’d found in the wood, three weeks after he’s gone missing on patrol.
He all but ran from the dining room. Mikasa started to follow him when she was stopped by the Corporal.
“Eat your breakfast and help clean this shit up. I’ll go check on the brat.”
Mikasa was about to protest but she knew that Levi was probably the better person to check on his, not that she liked that or would ever admit it.
Levi followed after Eren. He’d been watching the brat from the moment he’d stepped into the room with his harness straps on backwards. He’d watched his encounter with the usual brats that were now a part of his squad. He’d watched his face go pale. The sheen of sweat that had started to form on his forehead.
Something wasn’t right and he was determined to find out what
My internet has crashed three times while trying to post this. Please enjoy. Leave me some feedback. I love hearing what you guys think.
Eren collapsed into an alcove in a part of the castle that he was certain people didn’t usually go to. He’d walked as far away from the mess hall as he could, taking twists and turns to find somewhere. His heavy breathing was loud in the small corridor. He put his head in his hands and tried to breath normally again. Thankfully he hadn’t been sick. Hopefully he’d gotten far enough away that he couldn’t be heard.
Shit. Eren thought to himself. Blocking the only exit was Levi, his arms crossed over his chest as he looked down at the boy on the floor. Eren had his knees drawn up to his chest, he had a light sheen of sweat covering his forehead. He refused to look at Levi.
Levi huffed and covered the short distance between them, He looked down at the lightly slightly dusty floor and huffed in annoyance before sliding down the wall into a sitting position.
“What’s wrong?” He asked, masking his concern.
Eren looked down at the dusty floor. “Nothing. I might have a cold or something.”
Levi scoffed. “I know you’re not sick, Eren. So tell me what’s really the matter.”
Eren went silent, his heart felt heavy. He didn’t want anyone to see him like this. He didn’t need them looking too deeply into what was wrong with his and discovering something worse.
“it’ll probably be easier for you to tell me what’s wrong, rather than one of your friends.”
Eren froze. He frowned. “I consider you one of my friends, Levi.” Eren replied.
Levi didn’t say anything. He frowned at Eren.
Did I say something wrong? Oh crap, did I call him by name? Do I call him by name yet? Eren thought to himself, not remembering when Levi had told him to stop being so formal.
They sat in silence for a few minutes. Eren thought about leaving but he knew that Levi wasn’t finished with him yet so he stayed where he was.
“If it’s bad dreams, I can relate. It’s difficult….seeing your friends die. “ Levi said. The unspoken ‘again and again’ wasn’t missed by Eren. He wasn’t looking at Eren when he said it, eyes trained on the floor as if he was letting Eren in on a secret.
“If you ever need to talk. My door is always open.” Levi said. Eren didn’t look at Levi, he just nodded slightly. “Anyway, now you’ve calmed down, mind telling me what got you into such a flurry?”
Levi was right. He was calmer. He hadn’t noticed when it had happened but his breathing had slowed, his heartbeat had returned to normal. Eren didn’t want to lie to Levi but he couldn’t tell him the truth of what was upsetting him.
He didn’t even know if what he was doing was the right things, should he be keeping this all a secret when he could save someone’s life?
“If you could change the past, would you?” Eren asked him.
“No” Levi said simply.
“Not even if you could save someone, bring them back to life.” Eren implored.
“I wouldn’t.” Levi said firmly. “ I believe that everything happens for a reason, in this shitty world you have to.”
Eren clenched his fists. It was what he had wanted to hear but it didn’t make him feel any better about what he was doing. Just looking at his friends brought on such terrible memories. He didn’t have that with Levi, he couldn’t remember him dying. Maybe he’s died after Eren or in the same battle at least.
“Okay.” Eren said as he went to stand. Levi grabbed his wrist to stop him from going.
“You haven’t told me what’s wrong.”
“I’m just working through some stuff. A few regrets. I’ll come see you when I’ve figured it out.” Eren said as he quickly made his escape.
He didn’t look back to see if Levi was still sitting there. Instead he raced off down a couple of corridors, trying to make his way back. But after a few wrong turns he realised that he didn’t have a clue what part of the castle he had ended up in.
He hoped he didn’t run into anyone, this would be pretty difficult to explain. Eren found a window and looked out, finding the court yard just below him. He was in the west part of the castle. That made it considerably easier.
Eren turned around and made his way back to the mess hall, from what he could remember. Hopefully Mikasa had saved him some breakfast.
Levi stayed in the dark corridor for a little while more after watching Eren walk out in the wrong direction. Something didn’t seem quite right about him today. Levi decided to keep a close eye on him.
For the next couple of hours Levi watched Eren from the shadows. He watched as Eren went down wrong corridors or got soldiers names wrong. He watched as he interacted with the others from his cadet class. Something just didn’t seem right to Levi. He couldn’t shake the feeling. Eren didn’t seem as bright as he had yesterday. He didn’t seem himself at all.
Levi’s office window over looked the training ground. It was something to watch when he was bored, but today he kept his eyes firmly glued on Eren, his equipment still on backwards. The young soldiers were having hand to hand combat training. Something that should be second nature to Eren but as Levi watched he noticed that Eren was sloppy.
The younger man was currently training again the girl that never stops eating. He should be superior to her in hand to hand combat but something was different today. Eren’s attacks were slow and unbalanced. His defence had so many hole in it Levi was surprised that he was managing to keep up with Sasha.
Something didn’t sit well with Levi. After watching Eren for the majority of the day there were too many things that didn’t add up. Eren didn’t know his way around the castle, he’d gotten his gear on backwards and now he couldn’t keep up with a girl that spent most of her training days messing around.
Sasha came forwards and delievered a kick that was easily avoidable but Eren floundered and was knocked off his feet.
A sick feeling spread through Levi as he looked down. That isn’t Eren.
Levi composed himself as he opened the window. He swallowed hard.
“Oi, brat. Bring me some tea. Now.” Levi shouted down.
Sasha smiled as she helped picked Eren up off the ground.
“Tch, looks like the corporal want a tea. Off you go to make it like a good little boy, Eren.” Jean teased, jealous that Eren saw getting out of training.
Eren stood, rubbing the spot where Sasha had kicked him. “You’re just jealous that I can make tea, must be difficult only have hooves.” Eren taunted as he walked off.
Connie burst out laughing as he tried to hold Jean back from going after Eren.
Eren made his way to the kitchen easier than he had this morning, after exploring the castle a little. He placed the kettle over the fire stand, finding it strange to not just click a button and have the kettle boil. He got out a tray and started to place everything he would need on it, including a tea straining as tea bags weren’t a thing here.
Eren wondered why the captain had called him in out of training for a cup of tea. Normally he waited till Eren had free time to start monopolising it, he remembered.
It was strange being back in his younger body, he thought as he tried to reach for a cup from a higher shelf. There wasn’t just the physical aspect either. There was also the emotional side of it.
The kettle started to whistle, announcing it was done. Eren used a cloth to take it off the stove and started to fill a small pot with leaves, adding the water. He carefully picked up the tray and made his way to the Corporals room.
Eren’s heart was beating a little faster than usual, he realised he was nervous to see Levi. Almost as if he was going for a….Oh god, I have a crush on him. Eren realised. He hadn’t really ever thought about it, the adoration he’d felt in his past life, the reason he didn’t form relationships in his future.
Had he fallen for the captain somewhere and forgotten? He knew he was gay in the future but….Well, this might he awkward.
Eren knocked on the door and entered without a word from the captain. Levi was leaning against his desk with a scowl on his face. Eren placed the tray carefully on the table.
Eren hadn’t noticed the captain walking across the room till he was being grabbed by the back of his throat and shoved into the wall face first. He felt something cold and sharp against his neck. A knife?
“Don’t fucking move. I don’t know how you’ve done it but who the fuck are you?” Levi snarled.
Eren froze, he’d never heard Levi this furious before. The knife pressed into him.
“Wha-what?” Eren stuttered. “I don’t understand.”
“Like fuck you don’t” Levi pressed Eren’’s face into the wall forcefully. “Don’t fucking lie to me.”
Eren didnt know what was happening. The knife pressing at his throat was starting to get painful as it threatened to cut the skin. Eren was frightened.
“I’ll ask you again. Who the fuck are you.”
“I’m Eren…I swear, I am. “ Eren pleaded, he didn’t know when he’d started crying, tears streaming down his face. “Please, Levi.”
“Don’t fucking say my name you sack of shit.” The blade moved round to the front of his neck. “Who are you?”
Eren had fucked up somewhere. He didn’t know what he had done. He thought that he had been convincing, apparently not convincing enough.
“I’ll kill you right now. Tell me.”
“Please, don’t make me do this.” Eren pleaded as a last ditch attempt.
“You don’t know anything about this castle, you’re fighting skills are awful and you’ve got your equipment on backwards. Who are you?”
He didn’t know what this information would do to the future, let alone Levi having the bear the brunt of the secret. As the knife pressed deeper, he knew he didn’t have a choice.
“You’re right. I’m not…I’m not your Eren but I am Eren.” Eren sobbed. “I don’t know what happened, I just woke up here instead of there.”
Levi pressed his into the wall. “What the fuck does that mean?” his breath fanned over the back on Eren’s neck. Warm and deadly.
“I’m…Oh God…I’m from the furture. I don’t even know if this is real.” Eren half sobbed half laughed manically. “I could be dead, I don’t know. Please…”
“I’ve don’t know my way around because I can’t remember. I can’t remember everything.” Eren cried.
Levi took the knife away from Eren’s throat and spun him around. Looking at the face of the young man, tears dripping from his eyes. Levi could see that he was telling the truth for the first time today. Levi felt sick. Eren was terrified. He’d sacred him.
He dropped his hold as if Eren had burnt him. Eren slumped to the floor. Furiously wiping his tears away. He couldn’t believe that he’d told him. What if something happened to Levi because of it?
“I’m sorry.” Eren said quietly.
Levi dropped to his knees in front of Eren. “Shit.” Levi said he himself. He’d ruined everything. He’s made Eren afraid of him. “Fucking shit.”
“I’m sorry.” Eren repeated. “I didn’t want anyone to have to deal with this. What if I make the wrong move and destroy the future? I’m so sorry I’m putting you through this, Levi.”
Levi’s head snapped up to face Eren. The boy’s eyes were frightened but not of him, for him? “No. you have nothing to be sorry for.” Levi reached a hand out and dropped it back to his side. “I hurt you. I scared you.”
Eren grabbed Levi’s hand. “No. I’m fine. Look,” Eren licked his thumb and whipped away the blood, where his saliva met his slight cut healed. “see, I’m fine.”
Levi couldn’t believe it. Eren had purposely healed himself in a way that he hadn’t seen before, was this knowledge of the future? Levi wasn’t sure if he wanted to know.
“I’m not afraid of you Levi.”
Levi frowned. “I would have killed you.”
“I would have killed me too. You were worried for the other me. Thank you.” Eren smiled though his last tears.
Levi’s bit his lip and looked away. “I’ll protect you, Eren. “ He said suddenly. “I’ll make sure you remember your training. I’ll teach you how to put on your equipment properly.”
“Okay,” Eren smiled. “It’s good to see you again, Captain Levi. “ Eren’s were something entirely different now.
Levi frowned. Was he not in Eren’s future? Or had he forgotten this life?
Eren had been sitting on the sofa with his hands over his face, he didn’t know how long he’d been sitting like that, but he could tell, even if he wasn’t looking at him, that the Corporal was getting pissed at him now.
“Explain it to me again, Brat.”
“I’ve told you everything I can. Probably more than I should.” Eren said with a heavy sign.
“Just do it.” Levi commanded.
“Fine.” Eren forced himself to sit straight. He flung an arm over the back of the sofa and crossed his legs. Much like, Levi had done when they’d first met. “I was hit by a car, sent over the bonnet and hit my head. When I woke up, I was here.”
“You know that’s not what I meant.” Levi glared, or what Eren assumed was a glare as the Captain looked like that constantly.
“I don’t remember you being this irritating.” Eren huffed.
“You’re forgetting a lot more than that. I’m your superior, show some damn respect. Or would you rather I handed you over to Hanji.” Levi said smoothly.
Eren wasn’t quite sure what had happened to the man that had said he was going to protect him, but he was probably buried under all the lies that Eren had been failing to hide.
“Levi, I don’t know how much I should tell you. Even knowing that I’m from the future will probably have repercussions.”
“You talk pretty big, eh, Eren. Go to a fancy school?” Levi folded his arms as he read the other. “You’re also older than you’re letting on, hm?”
Eren felt a blush start to go up his cheeks as Levi watched him closely. He cursed his traitorous body. He’d never asked to be young again, going through puberty once was enough, twice was annoying but three times?! This was just a joke.
“I don’t think any of that matters.”
“It does if you want to pull of being little bratty Eren, otherwise your friends are going to catch on to something.” Levi looked down at his nails, checking for non-existent dirt.
Eren bit his tongue, he hadn’t thought about that. Having to dumb himself down was going to be annoying. He wasn’t a very good actor to begin with.
“Anyway, this future?”
“It’s Corporal Levi.” He corrected.
Eren threw his hands into the air and looked around dramatically. “There’s nobody here but you and I, Levi. I hardly think it matters what I call you. Or would you rather I call you Mr. Ackerman? Would that work?” Eren sassed.
Levi clenched his jaw, he leaned forwards. “When did I tell you my name, Brat?”
Eren sighed in frustration. “I don’t know, somewhere down the line it just…comes up.”
“Like how you insist on calling me ‘Levi’”
“Stop being so god damn vague.” Levi slammed his fist down on the desk, making Eren jump. He stalked over to Eren and leant over him. Balancing himself with one arm on the wall. “I know you’re from the future now. I know your older than you seem. You may as well tell me what you can, so I can work at keeping it from the others.” Levi whispered angrily.
Eren felt his cheeks becoming hotter and hotter at the close position. Was there a reason he had to get so close? Levi smirked. He smirked at me!
Levi did have a good point though, he had screwed up already. Who knew what had already been changed by him just being here. He didn’t even know if any of this was real. He could be dreaming it for all he knew. He knew from his medical training that keeping something like this bottled up wasn’t going to be healthy for him either. His mental health and emotional wellbeing would suffer if he did.
“I’m 25 and I’m almost in the last year of my medical training. My parents died when I was eight and Mikasa became my legal guardian. There aren’t any titans...they were wiped from the history books too. As far as anyone is concerned in the future, they’re a fairy tale.” Eren said quickly as if just saying the words would destroy the world.
“Fairy tale’s? Are you fucking kidding me?” Levi said down heavily next to Eren. “Everyone who died, who will die, is just swept under the rug?”
Eren shrugged. “I’d rather it be that way really. There’s less triggers that way.”
“What the fuck are you talking about now?” Levi asked as he started to pour himself a cooling cup of tea.
“Memory triggers. You don’t just magically wake up with all your memories from the past intact. Mine were triggered by Mikasa moving onto the street. I had some horrible nightmares…didn’t have a clue what was going on.” Eren sighed “Before that, I was an ordinary kid, I had no worries. Sometimes I think it would have been better if I’d never remembered.” Eren explained.
Levi didn’t know what to do with this information as the boy poured his heart out to him. His hand twitched around his cup, he had a strange urge to put his hand on Eren to comfort him.
“who else is in your future? Any familiar faces?” Levi asked with a glint in his eye.
“Not many that I’ve found. My parents knew, Mikasa…her husband….you’ll like this…her husband is Erwin.”
“You’re fucking with me.” Levi announced.
“I think you’d know if I was.” Eren wiggled his eyebrow.
Levi raised a perfect one in response and cracked a slight smile behind his cup.
“I saw that smile. You can’t hide that from me.” Eren grinned back, momentarily forgetting where he was. It was nice, talking to Levi like this again.
“So, Eyebrows marries your sister.”
“Well, she’s more like my foster parent than sister this time around, she’s 20 years older than me.” Eren explained. “I got lost while on holiday with Mikasa in Germany-“
“Where the fuck is Germany?”
“It’s another country…anyway. I got lost, Erwin found me crying on a bench in the middle of this huge square. He was like ‘where’s your mummy, little boy?’” Eren recalled. “When I looked up and he saw my face I knew he recognised me.”
“He helped you find Mikasa then happily ever after?”
“Hah, not so much. He’d put me on his shoulders and we were looking around the market when the police stopped us. They though Erwin had kidnapped me. Mikasa was losing her shit, as you’d imagine.”
“Did Shitwin get arrested? Please tell me they tackled him.” Levi said.
“We explained the situation, Erwin came with me to the police station to make sure I got there safely. Mikasa offered to buy him a meal as thanks, at this point she hadn’t even acknowledged him and Erwin was so smooth. He just said ‘ I know where you can get the best sausage in Germany, Miss Ackerman.’”
Levi choked on his tea. “You’re joking.”
“I’m really not. I still cringe sometimes just thinking about it.” Eren screwed up his nose in mock disgust. “They both adopted me when I was 12. I kept my last name, but for all intents and purposes I should be Eren Smith.”
“You didn’t want to be Eren Ackerman?” Levi asked wondering what the Brats reaching would be.
“Traditionally men don’t take their mothers name and seeing as Mikasa is a smith now-will be, there was no point.” Eren explained with a shrug.
Levi shifted to cross his legs. “That sure is an interesting story, Eren. Still, why should I believe any of this is true?”
Eren blinked in shock. He thought that the Corporal was on the same page as him. He knew that it was a little out there, but still. What was the point in even listening to him at all if he wasn’t even going to consider the possibilities.
“Do you think I’m making it up?” Eren asked, a dark tint to his voice.
Levi gave him a steel cold look. “Your previous shifter memories could be muddling your shitty little brain.”
Eren raised an eyebrow at that, sure, that was plausible. He remembered struggling with memories of the previous generation of titan shifters once before. Not being able to distinguish between them and his own till he didn’t know who he was anymore. This was different though, he knew he was from the future and not imprinting someone’s memories onto his own.
“If you don’t want to believe me, Levi, I’m done with this conversation.” Eren said as he stood, a firm grip on his wrist drew him back down.
“Don’t be an idiot all your lives, Eren. I was being sarcastic. Or do they not have that in this future of yours?” Levi said cockily. “Now sit, the fuck, back down.”
Eren collapsed onto the sofa with a sardonic laugh. “I’ve missed your crappy humour, Captain.” Levi raised an eyebrow. Eren, realising what he said felt a blush creep up his neck.
“Hmm, is that so? I’m taking from that, you haven’t come into contact with future me. If there is on.”
Eren looked down at his knees. “I can’t tell you the amount of time I’ve spent searching through crowds for a familiar face.” Eren smiled.
Levi felt a strange sensation in his stomach at the sad smile.
“The world is such a vast place now. We could be stretched across the world, never meeting. That’s why I kept my last name. Just in case.”
Levi put a hand on Eren’s knee, feeling the seemingly younger man jump slightly at the touch. “If I’m reborn and I remember. I’ll definitely remember this weird as shit conversation and I’ll come looking for you.” Levi promised.
Eren knew he was red in the face by this point, damn his teenage hormones.
A sudden knock on the door interrupted the tender moment.
“Corporal Levi, sir! There’s an emergency.” A cadet shouted from the other side of the door.
Levi got to his feet, placing his cup down and strode forwards to open the door. Behind the door was a startled cadet, blood on her white undershirt. “What happened?”
“Sir, during ODM training Cadet Jones fell, there’s a bone sticking out his leg.” She explained.
Eren jumped to his feet and moved to the desk, opening the draw that he knew Levi kept an emergency first aid kid, or he used too.
“Where’s Hanji?” Levi asked
“She’d out in town gathering suppliers, Sir.”
Eren opened up the first aid kid and grimaced. “Cadet.” Eren addressed her. Not knowing her name. “I need you to fetch, hot water, more bandages, something Cadet Jones can bite down on and whatever pain killers you can find.” Eren knew he didn’t have much to work with in this time. He doubted they even had pain killers.
“Sir..?” The cadet asked Levi looking confused.
Levi didn’t even glance at Eren. “You heard him, Cadet. That’s an order. Where is Jones?”
“The training fields. Sir.”
“Go.” Eren commanded. “We’ll meet you there.”
Eren made his way out the door. Levi following close behind. “Do you know the way?” Levi said just loud enough do Eren could hear.
“I remember, Sir.” Eren replied. “I’m going to run ahead, Sir.”
Levi noticed that Eren was being more formal with him now they were in the company of others as they walked at a brisk pace passed other soldiers. Levi felt glad for it but at the same time, he missed the closeness that they’d had in his little office.
Eren started to run ahead, the first aid kit at his side. As Levi watched he couldn’t comprehend that Eren had taken charge and ran off. It wasn’t something he was used to. The younger man always took orders without complaint. Not the other way around.
Levi jogged after him.
True to Eren’s words he remembered the way. A crowd surrounded the injured cadet. Eren called ahead for them to get out of the way. When they turned to see Eren and Corporal Levi running towards them, they made a gap for the men.
The first thing Eren saw when he entered the circle was that someone knew enough about first aid to elevate the wound above the heart to slow down bleeding. Eren saw Armin and inwardly cursed as he noticed a few other familiar faces. He didn’t know how he was going to explain away this one.
“Hey Cadet. “ Eren spoke. “Can you tell me your name?” He asked as he opened his first aid kit, glad to see a pair of gloves though they were material and not latex. He pulled them on.
“Its Jones, Sir. Fenton Jones” Fenton replied through strained breaths.
“Hey Fenton. My name is Eren and I’m going to help you, okay.”
“What is Jaeger doing?”
“He’s not medically trained is he?”
Eren could hear some of the younger soldier saying.
“Jaeger has been trained by Commander Hanji in emergency first aid. Go back to your training and give us some damn space.” Levi ordered. He pointed to Connie. “You, go get a stretcher.” He pointed to Jean. “Stay here to help carry Cadet Jones. The rest of you leave.”
Armin and Mikasa looked back at Eren before leaving with the rest of the crowd.
“Jean. I need you to squeeze above his thigh to slow the blood flow.” Eren ordered.
Jean looked at him in shock but knelt down and did exactly what Eren told him. He watched Eren work with a strange fascination as a Cadet ran over with water and more bandages.
“Is this all the pain killers you could find?” Eren asked as he looked down at the salve.
“I’m sorry, Sir. It’s all I could get.”
Eren cursed. “Captain, I’m going to need your flask.”
Levi froze as Eren held out his hand towards him. How did he know about that? Levi kept it well hidden, the only people that knew where it was had either seen him naked or Levi had shared his drink with, which he never did.
Eren was waiting, Levi huffed, reached into his boot and pulled out the little flask. He scowled as he handed it over to Eren.
Eren uncapped it and pressed it to the lips of Cadet Jones. “Drink this. Its strong.” Eren warned as the Cadet downed it, spluttering. Eren took out the salve and applied it around the wound, careful not to touch the bone.
“Now, this is going to hurt. I’m sorry.” Eren said. He put a large stick in front of the cadets face. “I’m going to need you to bite down on this”
“w-why?” Fenton asked.
“So you don’t bite your tongue off.” Levi said, watching Eren work.
Jean flinched, the Cadet bit down on the stick and nodded. “Okay Jean, I need you to hold him down. Corporal, you too.”
Once they were in position. Eren spoke to Fenton calmly. “Okay, were going to put your bone back into place. Bite down hard on the stick. Okay.”
Fenton nodded. Jean’s eyes widened. Eren could be serious, he couldn’t have had that much training and this was more advanced than first aid.
“On the count of three. One, two..” Eren slid the bone back into position. Jean struggled to keep Fenton down as he screamed in pain, a sweat had broken out over his face.
“Okay, were nearly done. You’re doing great, Fenton.” Eren said calmly as he started to sew the wound, quicker than Levi had thought possible.
Levi watched Eren make quick work of cleaning the wound and bandaging it up, using two large sticks so the knee couldn’t bend.
Levi had to admit that there was a part of him that hadn’t believed what Eren had claimed but after seeing this with his own eyes he could no longer deny it. This was no longer Eren Jaeger, titan shifter. This was Dr Eren Jaeger from a future than Levi couldn’t touch.
A future that Levi wasn’t even a part of. His heart ached.
Eren spent the rest of the day avoiding his fellow Cadets of the 104th. Sure, Levi had tried to explain his medical training away with basic first aid but that was some advanced work that he’d done on Cadet Jones. He couldn’t explain that away, not yet anyway.
Eren walked down an empty corridor and entered the small library, its walls crammed with books. Two small armchairs sat in the middle of the room with a small table between them. The room was dark and warm, the perfect hiding space. Nobody would think to look for Eren in the library. Afterall, Eren of the past could only read very basic things.
Eren collapsed into one of the armchairs and sighed. He put his hands over his face and breathed hard. He had remembered Cadet Jones after he had finished treating him and was told by the medical team that he had likely saved his leg. Th leg that Cadet Jones was supposed to lose. The leg that would cause him to drop out of the survey corps and start up a family with a civilian.
Eren had really fucked up. That was the only way that he could see it. But what was he supposed to do, let someone bleed out in front of him when he knew that he had the opportunity and skill to save them? No, that wasn’t what Eren had agreed to when he’d become a Doctor.
Eren leant back and groaned. There was no use thinking it over now, what was done was done.
Eren didn’t know how long he sat in the comfortable armchair with his head tilted backwards he swore that he only closed his eyes for a second but when he opened them again the room was pitch black and someone was shouting.
“Eren! Please you have to wake up. Come on!” She shouted.
“Come on Kiddo, don’t do this to us.” A strong male voice said.
“Eren, can you hear me. Squeeze my hand if you can hear me.”
Eren felt as if he was floating, but he knew he hadn’t stood up. The room smelt strange, like antiseptic. There was a strange beeping noise coming from somewhere. Eren tried to open his mouth to speak but nothing came out. He tried to move his hand, but nothing came of it.
Was he lying down? He couldn’t tell.
“Eren! Oi, shit face. Wake up.” Eren’s was being shaken awake, but wasn’t he already awake?.
His eyes opened, the library was well lit, smelling of books and coffee. Levi loomed over him, his expression guarded.
“Hmm, Levi?” Eren asked.
“Have a nice sleep, Brat?” Levi asked with a bored expression.
Eren grimaced. “I think I screwed up.”
Levi looked shocked at his response. He leaned back to give Eren a little bit of room and sat down in the chair opposite him.
“How so?” Levi asked as he busied himself pouring a coffee for himself, dropping a lump of sugar in and a dash of milk. He prepared one for Eren also.
Eren didn’t look surprised at the gesture, Levi guessed that they did this often then. Interesting.
“The Cadet with the broken leg. He was supposed to lose it and leave the corps.”
“Ah.” Levi said as he handed Eren his coffee.
Eren blanched. “Is that all you have to say?”
“Its not a big deal. I’ll just convince brass to dismiss him.” Levi shrugged.
Eren took a sip of the coffee. “You’d do that for me, Captain?”
Levi didn’t look at Eren, his feet suddenly very interesting. “Its not for you. Its to keep that future safe.”
Eren let out a sigh and reclined in his chair. “So, how was your day?”
Levi laughed. “Really, Eren. Small talk? What are we, an old married couple?”
Eren smiled and took another sip of coffee. It was surprisingly nice, for saying he was used to starbucks.
Levi scowled. “It was fine. I did some shitty paperwork and waited for Hanji to come back. Briefed her on what had happened, lied about you having training from your father and generally covering up your messes.” Levi took a sip of his coffee. “You know, the usual.
Eren frowned. “Sorry.”
“Don’t worry about it, brat.”
The fell into a comfortable silence. Levi drinking his coffee, with his papers on his knee. Eren felt himself smile. A relaxed looking Levi was a very good looking one. Eren didn’t quite know why he hadn’t realised the strong attraction that he felt towards the older man in the past. He couldn’t really remember ever being attracted to anyone in the past, he knew he didn’t like girls but he hadn’t realised he was gay till he was in his teens in the future.
Although he was pretty sure that had everything to do with the raven haired lead singer or pNo Name, a band that Eren had failed to get tickets to see, again and again. Something about his voice just sent shivers up his spine.
When Eren came out of his thoughts he found Levi staring at him, unabashedly.
“How did you know where my flask was?”
The ground was icy with winters first snow. What was once pristine white snow was now strewn with blood and corpses. Eren could see his arm lying in the field not too far away from where he had pulled himself from his titan. He looked down at the empty stump expecting it to grow back, knowing it wouldn’t.
The titans were defeated. Eren had torn through the last of them. Ripping them limb from limb. Commanding them to kill themselves, till there was nothing left but blood and steam.
Eren put a hand over his stump and got to his feet, It wasn’t too far away. He knew that. He stumbled in the snow, moving forwards slowly as blood gushed from his arm.
He walked over the fallen bodies of soldiers without faces to the big tree in the middle of the clearing.
Under it lay a single soldier, missing an arm just like Eren.
His raven hair was plastered against his face. Blood falling from a split lip.
“Corporal?” his voice was shallow.
“Eren.” Cough. “You…made it, huh?” A rasping breath came from the man.
Eren slipped down the tree to sit besides him. “I guess. I’m not…I feel dizzy.” Eren admitted.
“You want a drink?” He fished out the flask from his boot and handed it to Eren with his left hand. His right completely gone.
“It’s Levi, how many….cough cough….how many…cough” Levi hacked up blood.
“Ugh, I don’t think I’m making it…out….of this one.”
Eren didn’t say anything. He took a sip from the flask and grimaced at the strong flavour. He handed it back to Levi.
His arm burned where it had been town off. He could feel his eyes becoming heavier as the cold of the snow seeped into his bones and lulled him to sleep.
“Levi. I’m really sleepy. Is it okay….can…can I sleep?”
Levi took a swig from his flask and threw it into the snow. Nothing left. He put his arm around Eren and with the rest of his strength he pulled the taller male in.
“I’ve got you. You can sleep…cough…sleep now….cough.”
Eren knew he’d blush if he had the blood to go to his cheeks. Unfortunately, it was too busy leaving his body to stain the floor.
Eren felt his eyes drop as he listened to the steady thumping of Levi’s heartbeat…thumb….thumb…thumb…Eren closed his eyes.
Eren didn’t know how to answer Levi’s question.
“You gave me a drink.” Eren whispered and looked down at the swirling blackness in his cup. He hadn’t seen Levi crossing the space between them.
Levi put a hand under Eren’s chin, forcing him to look him in the eye.
“You’re crying.” Levi said softly, brushing away a tear.
Levi was very close to Eren’s face. Looking him in the eyes with an expression so filled with something….something….that Eren hadn’t experienced first hand but had seen between Mikasa and Erwin. Love.
Eren’s eyes were locked with grey as Levi moved forwards to captured his lips. His lips were softer than what Eren had been expecting, gentle. Levi cupped Eren’s face like he would break and Eren almost did. He pushed Levi back. A look of hurt passing over the older man’s face before it was covered.
“It isn’t me. The one you love. I’m not that Eren.” He said softly.
Levi scowled. “ are you Eren Yeager?”
“Did you fight the titans?”
“Will you eradicate all the titans?”
“No. You’re the same person. Isn’t that what you were trying to convince me of earlier?”
“levi.” Eren said with a small smile. “I can’t. It’s too cruel. I might disappear at any moment and we never..” Eren covered his mouth.
Levi slumped back. Sitting on the table. “Oh, so that’s it. Nothing becomes of us.”
Eren groaned. “This is so messed up.” He felt the prickling sensation behind his eyes that told him he was going to cry. “I’m sorry. I didn’t find out I liked men till I was thirteen, this time around.” Eren said awkwardly.
Levi’s laugh was sardonic. “So any hint I lay down you’ll dismiss. I guess that’s why you haven’t…the other Eren...hasn’t said anything about my advances.” Levi groaned. “ He hasn’t, fucking, noticed.”
Thinking back on his past Eren could vaguely remember times that Levi had offered his tea in his room, told him to call him by his first name, saved his a space for dinner. Oh god, how could he have been so blind.
“Let me guess. If I initiate something after you’re gone I’ll mess up all of time. So I better be a good little shit and forget all about this.” Levi stood his back to Eren.
Eren’s hand moved without though. He grabbed Levi’s wrist.
“I really like you, Levi. I’ve been looking for you, I have…but…you aren’t….I haven’t found you. I don’t want to start something, go back and not find you. Or worse, you’ve forgotten everything and want nothing to do with me. “ Eren felt a tear escape him. “It’d break my heart.”
“shouldn’t we make use of the time we do have, then?” Levi said quietly. “I promise you, even if I don’t remember you. I’ll fall for you over and over again.”
Eren felt his heart constrict. He knew it was wrong, so much could go wrong. It would hurt so much
“Levi…” Eren swallowed. “Okay.”
Poor Levi, making so many advances and nothing came of it. Eren, dying in his arms without ever knowing.
let me know what you think!!!
Eren went to bed that night with a small smile on his face. He and Levi had shared a kiss or two in the deserted library. Eren didn’t want to sound like a teenage girl, but it had been magical. He’d never felt anything like it. Levi’s lips were hot and softer than he’d expected them to be, they’d melded against his perfectly. He thought that his captain might be a little on the phobic side when it came to germs, but apparently that didn’t extend to trading spit. They’d stood there for a good twenty minutes, just kissing.
Eren had felt Levi’s hands in his hair, pulling at him gently. Eren could hardly believe it as he was allowed to let his hands roam over the strong body of a practiced soldier. When it had gotten heated, Levi had pulled away. For a second there, Eren thought he had done something wrong.
Levi had been keeping an eye on the time though, and it would have been fishy if they’d not turned up to dinner.
Eren told Levi, before the kissing session, that this had to stay between them. Nobody could find out about their relationship. Eren hadn’t said why and Levi didn’t ask.
So lying in his bed, in a dark dungeon, in the middle of the night…he was alone with his thoughts.
Eren rolled to the side and looked down at his right hand, he felt the supple flesh of his thumb muscle. He could hardly remember the pain of having to bite through his hand multiple times. He wondered it he would have to do it again. Would he have to injure himself to turn into a titan?
Would he have to fight again?
Would he have to see his friends die?
How long would he be here?
Eren closed his eyes and willed himself to calm down.
…..Would he ever go home?
It was dark all around him. Eren stood in the middle or a black abyss. All he could see was darkness and his body. Eren didn’t understand how he could see the hand in front of his face if there wasn’t any light.
In the nothingness he could hear people saying his name.
It was soft, a woman’s voice speaking to him slowly. Was she reading?
Eren couldn’t quite make out what was being said. Only his name, said with such sadness that it made him want to cry.
“Eren, please don’t leave me…..wake…..please.”
“Eren….hey, wake up.” He felt his arm being shook. Eren jolted awake. A wetness on his face.
“You okay, Eren? It’s breakfast time. Did you have a bad dream?” Hanji asked as she stepped back with a grin. “What to tell me about it?” She winked.
“I’m fine, Hanji. Where’s Corporal Levi? He normally wakes me up.” Eren asked as he threw back his covers. No need to be shy with Hanji, she’d seen him naked. Too many times to count, he also remembered her cutting off his little toe once.
Hanji gasped and put a hand to her chest, mockingly. “I’m hurt. I thought seeing my beautiful face instead of Mister Grumpy pants would put you in a good mood”
Eren laughed good naturedly and stood. He walked over to his desk and started to pull on his clothes.
“Don’t spoil me, Commander, people will think you have favourites.” Eren said as he was careful to put his gear on the right way round this time.
“I heard about what happened yesterday. I checked over the cadet, his leg was saved because of you.” Hanji said.
Eren froze and forced what he thought was a convincing smile as he tightened the last belt in place. “Yeah, just something I picked up from watching my dad. He wanted me to become a doctor, so he took me on a few of his trips.”
Hanji nodded. “I see, Grisha was an incredible doctor. He helped a lot of people.”
Eren nodded and kept a tight lipped slime in place.
“Breakfast?” Eren asked as he made an ‘after you’ motion towards the door.
Eren followed Hanji up the stairs. Trying to figure out his dream but the more he tried to think about it, the more it slipped through his fingers. It was like he was trying to catch smoke.
“Morning Brat, I see you’re on time today.” A deep voice said from the top of the stairs.
Levi stood with his back against the wall, arms crossed. One of his eyebrows was raised and a small half smirk was forming on his lips. Eren saluted him in response.
“Good Morning, Sir.”
“Tch.” Levi pushed himself off the wall and got into step with Hanji. “why the fuck are you here?”
“Aw, you jealous I came to wake up our little titan?” Hanji joked.
Eren tried his best not to look obvious as a small blush started to spread across his cheeks. God, did he hate being a teenager again. Just a smile from Levi, felt like it was setting his body alight. He wondered if Levi felt the same.
Glancing up, he saw that Levi was staring at him as soon as he saw him watching he turned back to Hanji.
The mess hall was buzzing with laughter and jokes. Eren felt someone coming up behind him as he was slapped and the shoulder and smiled at by a random cadet that he couldn’t remember the name of.
Eren could see Mikasa and Armin at a table in the corner. Levi and Hanji broke off to the officers table, Eren walking over to his friends.
Eren sat next to Jean, who raised an eyebrow before going back to shoving the porridge down his throat.
“Morning.” Eren greeted as he picked up his spoon.
Mikasa frowned at him. “ are you feeling better this morning”
Eren smiled at the familiarity of the young woman, making him miss the older version. “Yeah, I got a better night’s sleep.”
“Is that so.” Mikasa said. He tone was short and did not require a response.
Eren felt his blood run cold. He knew that tone of voice very well, it was the same one he got when he’d done something wrong and had been given the chance to come clean, only for him to lie and fall into her trap. The famous ‘Mother’ voice. Eren tried to remember when he’d talked to her and what he could have said that had made her mad, but he couldn’t think of anything.
Armin was doing his best to avoid eye contact as he slurped down his porridge as fast as he could. Eren decided to follow suit and do his best not to look at Mikasa.
“So, read any good books lately, Eren?” Jean asked casually. Armin’s eyes flashed up as Jean jolted in his seat exclaiming in pain.
Eren continued to eat his porridge. “No. I’m not very good at reading, remember.”
“ You don’t have to be to visit the library.” Jean snarked, glaring at Armin.
“Shut up, Jean.” Armin hissed.
Holy. Fucking. Shit.
Eren looked between the three cadets that were sitting on his table with him. Mikasa was glaring over at the officers table, Armin was doing his best not to look him in the eyes and Jean was smirking at him.
They’d seen him. He didn’t know when, but they’d seen him with Levi. How the fuck had they seen them? The door had been closed, hadn’t it? He couldn’t quite remember.
Jean sniggered into his porridge. “Don’t be shy, Eren. We saw quite the show.”
Eren tried his best to stay calm. He took a deep breath and smiled at Jean. “Please shut up, Jean. Or I’ll shove my spoon so far up your nose, your new name will be froot loops.” Eren’s voice was quiet and polite.
It only took Eren a second after saying it to realise that his perfectly good insult would be lost on uncultured ears. Though he thought his breakfast lobotomy joke was pretty funny and he was sure Isabel would have appreciated.
Jean’s eyes were wide as he tried to think of a come back as Eren went back to eating his breakfast. Armin rasised an eyebrow in question, not quite understanding where the bull-headed Eren had disappeared to.
“Oi, shitty brat. We have training to get to. Finish your breakfast and report to my office.” Levi announced before he walked out. Pretty obvious to who he had addressed.
Eren closed his eyes, and sighed in notification. That really couldn’t have been said at a worse time. Not with the current topic of discussion.
“Eren. Explain.” Mikasa commanded. “We’d also like to know where your medical knowledge came from because I know Commander Hanji isn’t giving you lessons. Neither did your father so don’t try to pull that.”
Eren had managed to keep the chatting to a minimum when they were at the table with a promise to tell them what was happening. He couldn’t tell them the trust through. Levi knowing was already pushing it.
But, then he thought about what would happen when he was gone and the other Eren was back. Would they bring up his and Levi’s relationship over breakfast again? Would they talk to him about his miraculous medical ability? Would they rub salt into the wound of his absence with Levi?
“Eren?” Mikasa said. Bringing his attention back to the room.
They’d gone to Armin, Connie and Jean’s bedroom. The perks of being in Levi squad meant they got a little more privacy than the other cadets.
Eren said down heavily on Armin’s bed.
“What’s going on with you, Jeager? You don’t seem like yourself. Not that I care.” Jean said.
“What’s so complicated about fucking your superior officer that’s supposed to kill you if you get out of hand” Jean shrugged. “Oh wait!” He said dramatically.
“We haven’t screwed.” Eren said. When nobody said anything, he realised maybe screwed wasn’t a word associated with sex yet. “We aren’t having sex.” He left off the ‘yet’.
“Then what?” Mikasa said. She sat down next to Eren and put a hand on his shoulder. “I just want to make sure you’re being safe, Eren” She said.
Oh god, he’d had this talk before. The sex talk, it got even more embarrassing when Erwin was involved.
“Its not…no….ugh.” Eren said as he thought with himself. “You might want to sit down.” He said to the other two.
Armin and Jean shared a worried glance as they both sank onto Jean’s bed opposite.
“This can’t leave this room. You need to promise me. Cross your heart and hope to die.” Eren motioned. The three looked confused but nodded. “That probably doesn’t make much senses, huh. It means that if you break the secret you’ll die. It’s a thing that children do where I come from.”
“Eren, we grew up in the same town. I haven’t heard that phrase before.” Armin said.
“I know. It isn’t from Shinganshina. It’s from England. About….2000 years in the future.” Eren dropped the bombshell.
Nobody spoke for a second before Jean started to laugh.
“Nice joke, Jeager. You trying to tell us you’re from the future?” He looked at Mikasa and Armin and laughed. “Can you believe thi-“ He didn’t continue at the shared look of horror Mikasa and Armin were wearing.
“Where’s Eren?” Mikasa asked. “What have you done with him.”
Eren held up his hands in surrender as he leaned away from Mikasa. “Nothing. I am Eren, I promise. Just…a little further away.”
Armin stood from the bed and started to pace the room, muttering to himself.
“You can’t actually believe what he’d saying? The future!?” Jean exclaimed.
“I read a book that mentioned time travel before. The physics of it is probable but it’s never been actually documented…it would also mean that…” He could see the clogs turning in Armin’s brain. “Reincarnation?”
“Guys, this is ridiculous. He just wants attention.” Jean said.
“Shut up for a second and listen to what he has to say, Jean. Eren shouldn’t know the amount of medical knowledge that he showed yesterday. His insults have also been a little bit too good.” Armin said.
Jean thought on it. “Yeah. They have been a little too well thought out. But what are froot loops?”
“it’s a breakfast cereal.” Eren explained.
Jean made the universal sign for ‘what’ with his hands.
“Loops as in loopy, lost your mind. Spoon, nose…mushed brain.” Eren explained. “It would have made my future friends laugh.”
“Eren. Are you telling us that you were reborn with your memories and somehow sent to the past?” Mikasa asked. “Why? Is there a purpose?”
“Have you come to end the titans?” Jean asked hopefully.
Eren fiddled with his hands, looking down at the floor.
“You didn’t, did you?” Armin said sadly.
“I shouldn’t do anything while I’m here. We don’t know the repercussions it’ll have to the future. That’s why, when I’m gone, you can’t tell the other Eren about Levi.”
“Corporal Levi knows then.” Mikasa stated.
“Yeah. He tired to kill me. Thought I was an imposter. Found out I was from the future. That nothing ever comes of our relationship no matter how many hints he drops and boom…here we are.”
Jean sat down next to Eren, his head in his hands.
“What about the future? Are you together?” Armin asked.
Eren was quiet as he bit his lip.
“That’s too fucking sad.” Jean announced. “You go back and all he’d left with is a memory. As the other you runs around, gets into fights and treats him like a stranger.”
“We can’t risk the future being changed.”
“I’m assuming the titans are gone but don’t tell us anything else, Eren.” Armin said. “This needs to be a secret. Our actions could change the outcomes of battles. If this changes too far off our path we could do irreversible damage to the future.”
Jean slung an arm around Eren’s shoulder. Eren tired not to jump at the unfamiliar touch. “So we help him. We keep it a secret. We help the corporal when he’s gone and take this to our graves.” Jean smiled. “Maybe we’ll get a do-over of this shit world.”
“Thanks, Jean.” Eren smiled.
“Is Marco there. In this future?” Jean asked quietly.
Eren tried to think. He vaguely remembered a trip to France with Erwin and Mikasa and the freckled face of a familiar stranger as a young man had crossed paths with them, waving down his friend at the foot of the Eiffel Tower.
“You’ll have to wait and see.” Eren said with a wink.
Jean wore a wide smile on his face for the rest of the chat as they discussed their best options for keeping Eren’s secrets and trying to find him a way back. Eren excused himself. Wondering what Levi would say when he found out.
He expected a lot of shouting and maybe some kissing. Maybe a lot of it.
I'm really sorry I've been gone for so long. I've been writing my Masters Dissertation so I've not had any time for myself. Hope you like this chapter, hopefully i can keep up to date now i've finished.
What Eren got when he finally made his way into the Corporal’s room was not kisses. He shut the door behind him after a quick knock and the acknowledgement to come in and before he knew what was happening he was pushing into the middle of the room.
“What the-“ Eren exclaimed as he was put into a choke hold.
“Come on, Eren. You should have flipped me by now.” Levi complained as he dug him knee into the back on Eren’s leg, causing him to collapse to the floor. Levi released his hold.
“I wasn’t expecting it!” Eren rubbed his throat.
Levi circled him, looking bored with his arms crossed and blank expression. Eren tried to stand only for Levi to give him an easy push, sending him back tumbling to the ground.
“That’s pretty pathetic, tch, you’re gonna die if you don’t take your finger out your ass.” Levi mocked.
Eren huffed from the ground. “At least let me get to my feet, damn it.”
“Why? The other you could get out of this easily.” Levi kicked out Eren’s left hand as he tried to get up again. “Show some determination.”
Eren grit his teeth, here he thought he was coming in for kisses and cuddles and Levi had actually meant training! Eren’s face was red with frustration, each time he tried to right himself, Levi would kick him down again.
This was ridiculous.
Eren lay on his back with his knees bent and when he saw that Levi was coming closer to stop him again he kicked his leg out at Levi’s knee.
Levi smirked as he jumped back, allowing Eren to quickly get to his feet and into the fighting stance that Annie had taught him.
“Ho, I guess you do remember some things.” Levi said as he assumed a fighting position. “Show me what you’ve got, brat.” Levi taunted.
As Levi circled him, Eren found that this stance didn’t seem as odd as he thought it would. His body remembered what he was supposed to do, even if his mind had forgotten some things. Levi continued to circle him. Sure, Eren hadn’t actually done any real fighting for years but it wasn’t like he was a novice. He vaguely remembered his days in the 104th corps and he also had the advantage of Erwin being his father.
And damn, had Erwin an Mikasa not let up with him learning self-defence from an early age. He’d only been able to quit when he’d gone to college and his grades had become more important than kicking a guy into some mats.
So, he’d gotten sloppy. It’s not like he needed to know such extensive fighting methods anymore, He was a Doctor not a Soldier.
“You not going to make a move?” Levi asked.
Eren laughed. “Why would I when I know you’re so much better than me? It’s easier to defend.”
Levi smirked as he came forwards with a punch, Eren blocked it with ease. What he didn’t expect was for Levi to kick out his legs again. Eren went back down with a ‘umpf’, groaning as his back hit the floor.
He didn’t wait to risk giving Levi an upper-hand as he kicked forwards, making contact this time. Eren jumped to his feet.
He didn’t even feel breathless; this young body was amazing.
“That was dirty, Captain.”
“Who said I was going to play nice, they certainly won’t.” Levi said as he rushed Eren.
Eren used Levi’s movement against him in the same way that Annie had showed him all those years ago. He grabbed Levi’s arm when it got closer, putting his other to his throat as he kicked out his legs from under him. Though Levi didn’t go down nearly as easily as Jean did. He grabbed Eren as he fell and somehow managed to flip their position, so Levi was straddling his check with an arm to his throat.
“Not bad.” Levi said.
With Levi on top of him in such an intimate position, he couldn’t help but blush. A deep red started from his neck and worked its way up as his heart thumped.
Oh god, I think I’m turned on. Eren thought to himself. In that moment he could see the clogs turning in Levi’s brain as he figured out the predicament they had found themselves in. Levi smirked and licked the top of his lip.
“Oh, what’s this?” He leaned down so they were cheek to cheek and whispered in Eren’s ear. “Are you enjoying being under me, Eren?”
Eren let out a shuddering breath as he felt something start to pool in his stomach. He didn’t think he’d ever been so turned on as in that moment.
Only for a knock to sound at the door and completely ruin the moment as Levi sprung to his feet. Eren couldn’t help to notice as Levi adjusted his skirt. Eren got to his feet and scowled.
Levi pulled the door open. “What the fuck do you want?”
Eren could tell that Levi was annoyed, he wasn’t too happy either.
“Aw, don’t be like that Levi. I’ve came to give you our next expedition in person and everything.” Hanji said. She popped her head round the door and grinned at Eren. “Hello, Eren. Ready for some more experiments? I thought we could see what happens when we chop something off”
Eren’s eyes widened. Oh hell no.
“Just give me the damn paperwork and get lost. I’m training Eren, so he can’t come with you.” Levi said as he snatched the itinerary from Hanji.
Eren stood with his hands in front of him and tried to look at natural as possible. “Should I get you some tea, Sir? You have a lot of paperwork to get through.”
Levi turned to look at him with a raised eyebrow.
Hanji pushed past Levi and made her way into the room. She narrowed her eyes at Eren and looked at him thoughtfully.
“There’s something that I can’t quite put my finger on about you lately, Eren.” She commented. Eren tried to keep as relaxed as possible but he could see Levi stiffen behind him.
“I’m not sure what you mean, Squad L- I mean Commander.” Eren grimaced.
“Don’t you have somewhere to be, Shitty Glasses?” Levi said. Breaking Hanji’s starting contest.
Eren saw her eyes light up, then nothing as she put in place a perfect poker face. She spun around and grinned at Levi.
“Oh well, I suppose I should get back to work.” She gave a little wave before she walked off but not without turning and winking at Eren.
Eren groaned, collapsing onto the sofa as Levi slammed his door.
“She knows.” Eren stated.
Eren raised an eyebrow. “Are you really that dense? She thinks we’re doing it.”
“ ‘it’?“ Levi asked with a frown.
Eren put his head in his hands and groaned again. “She probably thinks we’re having sex. Just like Armin, Mikasa and Jean. By the way, they know. They freaking saw us yesterday.”
“Well, that’s troublesome.”
Eren laughed. “Understatement of the year! I had to tell them about me in order to explain everything.”
Levi narrowed his eyes. “Why the hell did you do that? I thought keeping everything a secret was important.”
“It is. That’s why I had to tell them. When I’m gone and other Eren is back they’ll need to keep this-” he pointed between the two of them. “ -a secret.”
“Why? Doesn’t this mess with your time stream?”
“Not any more than other Eren knowing about us, god knows what he’d do.” Eren exclaimed.
He knew that in the past he would have done anything to keep his loved ones safe, if he was in a relationship with Levi he’d be tempted to try and save him every time a titan came too close. He might even get himself killed earlier than the original timeline. Or worse…he wouldn’t be able to accept Levi or it’d mess with his future-
Levi grabbed Eren’s shoulders. “Calm down, everything will be fine. Telling Hanji might not be a bad idea. When you’re back, of course. I don’t need her sticking her nose in and trying to force the information out of you.”
Eren took a deep breath and nodded.
“Yeah, okay, we can do this, it’ll be fine.”
Levi sat down on the sofa and crossed his legs. He opened the papers that he’d snatched from Hanji and looked them over. Eren couldn’t help but look down at the plans too. Skimming them though he read that it was a supply run, they’d be scoping the area while collecting herbs and berries that were in season in the area.
“You understand this.” Levi stated.
Eren nodded. “Yeah, of course. Its more unusual not being able to read and write in my time, especially in England.”
“Tch, Hanji had to teach me after I joined the corps.” Levi complained as he squinted at her handwriting. “Her penmanship is fucking awful.”
Eren chuckled. “Well, they do say that Doctors have awful handwriting.” He took the paper from Levi. “So, we’ll be going on a trip in two days for supplies. Right into titan territory.”
Levi took it back. “You’re not going.”
“What? Why?” Eren asked.
Levi gave him a look of exasperation. “You don’t even know how to do up your gear. Really think you can take to the skies, I bet you can’t even ride a horse.”
“I can! Erwin used to take me every Sunday.”
Levi laughed. “Oh, did he now? It’d hard to imagine Erwin playing Daddy.”
Eren frowned. Ewin was a great dad. He let Eren get away with murder when he was younger, but maybe that was just him trying to get on Mikasa’s good side. He, always came to Eren’s school plays and parents’ evenings. He praised Eren’s good grades and told him off when he was bad.
He wondered what he was doing now. Was he missing from that world? Was he lying in a hospital bed somewhere or was he still in the middle of the road where he’d been hit? Whatever had happened he knew that Mikasa and Erwin were probably losing their minds with worry.
“Eren, you’re crying.” Levi said softly.
Eren touched his cheeks. He was indeed crying. “I’m worried about Mikasa and Erwin. What if I’m already dead and this is the ‘your life flashing before your eyes’ moment.”
“Don’t speak like that.” Levi said as he wrapped an arm around Eren. “I’ll get you home, I promise.”
“It’s probably a soul slip.” Hanji suddenly announced from the door.
Levi and Eren jumped in shock, springing apart. Levi jumped to his feet.
“How long have you been there!” He exclaimed angrily.
“I never left, slowly opened the door. I knew something was up, but this is crazy!” Hanji exclaimed, flinging her hands into the air. “I’ve heard of soul slips before, but I’ve never actually seen one.”
Eren was internally losing his shit. This day had been fucking awful, he’d probably screwed the future up so badly that there was nothing to go back to now.
“Explain.” Levi said, glancing at Eren.
“A soul slip is when your soul leaves your body, like an out of body experience, but ends up in another body. Like possession, maybe.” Hanji said as she tapped her lips thoughtfully. “But in this case, Eren has gone into Eren. Now, how is that possible?”
Eren looked up and signed. He looked at Levi, who gave him a little shake of his head, obviously against the idea of telling Hanji but Eren couldn’t really see any way out of it, she’d heard enough.
“I’m Eren from the distant future. Please don’t ask me any questions.”
Hanji grasped and clapped her hands. “This is amazing! Are you talking about reincarnation? Have you just confirmed the possibility of reincarnation?” She said excitedly as she bounced over to Eren, Levi giving him a look that said, ‘You’ve done in now’ before he closed the door and locked it for good measure.
“I don’t really want to discuss it, Hanji.”
Hanji gasped. “You called me Hanji! Oooo, this really is exciting. Okay, Okay, I won’t ask you anything specific. Just let me know a few things that won’t mess with the future.”
Eren bit his lip but nodded his head.
“Are you and Levi in a relationship?”
Eren’s eyes widened. Levi chocked on air.
“Erm,” Eren looked at Levi. “Yes? I mean now, not in the future. Not that we couldn’t be, its just…yeah.” Eren babbled.
“Ah, I understand. Not everyone is in the future. Well, except that Ewin is your dad. How the heck did that happen?” Hanji asked curiously.
“My parents died when I was younger. Erwin and…erm…his wife, adopted me.” Eren said. He’d told Levi that Mikasa and Erwin were together, and he knew Levi could keep that secret, Hanji on the other hand.
“That’s so precious. Did Ewin give you the sex talk? I feel like I should in his place, if he hasn’t, as your aunty Hanji.”
“He doesn’t need a sex talk, Hanji.” Levi said, his arms crossed, face stern.
Hanji pouted. “Fine. How long have you been here Eren?” She said, becoming serious again.
“A couple of days.” Eren said. Hanji got out her notebook and started scribbling. “You can’t write any of this down, there can’t be a record!”
Hanji sighed and stopped writing. “Have you had any strange dreams? The only two cases that have been documented said that their dreams were…empty…”
“But for the voices.” Eren said.
Levi’s eyes widened in shock. He leant back on his desk and tried not to show his worry. Hanji leaned knelt down in front of Eren.
“What’s happening in your dreams? Can you tell me, Eren?”
Eren closed his eyes and tried to remember. “Its dark all around me and I can hear Erwin calling for me. I can’t, I can’t really remember what he’s saying but he sounds urgent.”
Hanji nodded and rested her hand on his knee.
“He’s calling you back. Next time you go to sleep you should follow the voices. They’re probably your tether to that life.”
“Probably? I’m not letting Eren risk that you probably. What if it doesn’t work?” Levi said through gritted teeth. He’d only just got Eren and now they were going to pull him away again.
“It might be his only chance. What if he stays here too long and can’t get back, ever. What happens to him then?” Hanji said as she stood facing Levi.
Eren bit his lip and listened to their fight. She was right. He couldn’t stay here where he didn’t belong. He didn’t have a clue what had happened to the other Eren either, what if he was trapped somewhere, like that cold abyss.
“I agree with Hanji. I can’t stay here.”
“Eren…” Levi breathed, a look of hurt passing his face.
“I’m sorry, Levi, but I don’t belong here.”
Levi turned away from him. “Fine, go back.”
Hanji looked between the two with a sad expression. She got up and walked towards the door. “I’ll give you guys some time alone.” Then she left.
Eren got up and walked over to Levi. “I can’t stay, you already knew that” he said softly as he put a hand on Levi’s shoulder only for it to be shrugged off. “I won’t go straight away. But I remember that expedition that’s coming up. I need to be gone before then.”
“Why?” Levi said, his back still to Eren.
“You were right, I can’t go on that mission, but Eren did and he needs to be there. That’s why.”
Levi turned, pulling Eren against him. Eren felt his hot breath against his neck and Levi held him tightly. He raised his own arms and put them around Levi’s frame, for such a short man, he could feel how powerful the muscles were underneath.
“Okay, you have to spend the entire day with me then. You can’t leave my side. You’ll sleep in here and sit by me for lunch.”
Eren smiled. “I think I can manage that, Captain.”
Eren poured the tea, it had been steeping the just the right amount of time so as to make the perfect brew. After a long day of being out they were back in Levi’s quarters. Getting ready to settle in for the night. As Eren poured the tea slowly, so as not to spill any, into the delicate tea cups that Levi had provided. He wasn’t aware that Levi was watching him so closely. Just like Eren had promised they had spent the whole day with Levi. Eren had obediently followed him around the castle and Levi had tried his best to fit everything he could into the day.
He'd taken Eren to a secluded grove just outside of the castle grounds. It had been a short walk, but still fall enough for them to be given some privacy. He’d raided his secret stash of food before leaving his office. Some bread the he’d collected from a bakery a couple of days before. A lump of cheeses he’d been saving for a special occasion and some jerky he’d been keeping a secret for Hanji.
The grove that he’d chosen was beautiful. The trees that surrounded the place were tall, perfect for training in. The leaves allowed the sunlight in but gave it an otherworldly glow. Wild flowers bloomed everywhere, yellow and whites and pinks, scattered amongst green.
He’d seen the light in Eren’s eyes as he’d been overwhelmed with the scene, Levi had discreetly pulled out a blanket and the food that he’d carefully tucked away. When Eren turned around, he knew that using his personal rations like this was the perfect idea, just for that surprised smile.
They sat and talked about everything and nothing at all. Levi had told Eren about his time in the underground city and how a street rat had become humanities strongest by sheer will power alone. He spoken of his friends, the plan that they’d originally had to get away from that life and how it had all fallen apart when he’d been enlisted by a noble to kill Erwin.
Eren didn’t judge him for it, he suspected that he’d either told Eren as some point down the line or Erwin had told him in the future.
In turn Eren told him about his childhood in the other world. How Mikasa had moved onto his street as a child, how his parents had been killed only a few months later and how Mikasa had swooped in and taken him away from a distant family that only cared about money.
He told Levi about Mikasa and Erwin’s wedding. How out of place he’d felt on the run up to it, feeling as though he shouldn’t have been there, that Mikasa was going to leave him and make her own family now that she’d found Erwin. Of course, he told Levi, that he’d never discussed this with Mikasa or Erwin. He told Levi about how overwhelmed he was when Erwin had bought home the adoption papers and told him that it was official. That Eren was officially their son in the eyes of the Law.
He’d told Levi that he’d cried all night and Erwin had ordered Pizza to celebrate, not that Levi knew what Pizza was, he just listened patiently. He told Levi how he’d really struggled with calling Mikasa ‘mum’. That is was strange that someone who he’d viewed as his sister for so long was suddenly his ‘mum’ but he’d fallen into it after a while. He told Levi that he called Erwin ‘Papa’ whenever he wanted something.
Apparently, Erwin was a sucker for childish Eren’s charms and Eren often got his own way with the older man.
When it had started to get cold and the skies had started to darken, Levi had suggested that they head back. Levi had helped Eren to his feet after tidying up. He still remembered Eren’s grip on his hand as he’d tried to pull away but Eren had dragged them towards the castle. Telling him that it was only natural that a couple hold hands.
They’d had to break away when they’d gotten too close to the training grounds, much to Levi’s annoyance.
By the time they’d made there way back it was already time for dinner. Levi and Eren had washed their hands and joined the rest of the squads in the dining hall. Eren had promised that they’d sit together but Levi was unsure where till he saw Hanji giving a little wave from his new squads table.
Mikasa was watching them closely and Levi couldn’t help but feel a little intimidated under her intense stare. Not that Levi showed it. Eren had called it ‘Resting Bitch Face’, apparently it was a big problem in the future.
They’d made idle chat with the younger soldiers. Jean, the horsey looking one, kept glancing at him with looks of pity. Levi had rolled his eyes at him at one point, Eren had put a hand on his leg at some point, causing him to jump and Hanji to laugh so suddenly that her drink came out her nose. Levi had looked at her with disgust.
When they’d finally retreated away from the rest of the squad and into the conform of Levi’s quarters he could shake the feeling of grief that was starting to form in his heart. He was already missing Eren and he hadn’t even left yet.
Levi watched as the teapot was place back down.
“You okay captain, you’re spacing out?” Eren asked as he handed Levi his cup.
Levi raised an eyebrow. “Spacing out? What the hell does that mean?” He placed the cup to his lips and breathed in the scent of freshly made tea.
“It means that you’re distracted, that you’re staring into space.” Eren explained as he sat beside Levi.
Levi nodded. “ It’ll have to remember that one. You’re always spacing out.”
Eren laughed. He tried to cover his hand with his mouth as the chuckles overtook him. “Sorry, Levi. Its just so peculiar hearing you say that.”
Levi smirked. “I’m sure I’ll know lots of new words by the time I find you again, Eren.”
Eren’s laugh stopped and a small sad smile replaced it. “I’m sure you will. With a face like yours, I won’t be surprised if you’re intragram famous.”
“What? What about my face.” Levi said with a stern scowl.
“It’s a good thing. Instagram is a…damn…I don’t even know how I’d explain it to you.” Eren murmured. His cheeks and ears started to turn pink. “I mean, you’re very beautiful Levi and people like beautiful people.”
Levi looked down at his tea, a single stork floating upwards. “I think you’re more beautiful that I could ever be, Eren. I promise you, I’ll find you. You’ve told me enough, I’ll know what to look for.”
Eren didn’t speak about his worry of Levi never being able to find him due to memory loss. Levi didn’t say anything either. They finished their tea, Eren humming something that Levi couldn’t put his finger on. It sounded oddly familiar, like he’d heard it a long time ago. Eren had a beautiful voice.
“What are you humming?” Levi asked.
Eren blushed. “Oh, it’s a song from my time, One of my favourite bands. I was supposed to go see when with a work friend but I’m betting I won’t be well enough to go, even if I do get back in time.” Eren said forlornly.
“it’s not an unpleasant tune. I’ll take you to see them. When we find each other. It can be out reunion…what did you call it…oh, date.” Levi said.
Eren grinned. “I’ll hold you to that, Levi. The tickets are really expensive.”
Levi rolled his eyes. “So.” The unspoken ‘you’re worth it’, hanging in the air.
Eren yawned and Levi felt his heart sink. It was almost time for him to say goodbye.
“Go get washed up. It’s time to get you to bed.”
Eren’s eyes widened. “I’m fine. I can stay up longer.”
Levi sighed. “Eren, I’ve loved spending this day with you. More than anything. I’ll remember this day for the rest of my life. However short it may be” Levi smiled sadly “but we need to get you back home. We don’t even know if this will work and there’s not long left till that expedition.”
“I’m sorry, Levi.” Eren said. There were tears in his eyes. Levi’s leaned forwards and wiped them away with his thumb. “I’m sorry that I’m going to leave you alone like this.” The tears started to fall.
Levi gritted his teeth to stay composed, if he lost it now it would all be over. He knew that he’d beg Eren to stay, on his hands and knees if that was what it took. But he had to be strong, he had to let Eren go back to his world. He couldn’t let Eren stay here, he didn’t know what would happen to him if he did.
“I won’t be alone, brat. The other you will surely get into enough trouble to keep be busy. Not to mention I need to get on Mikasa’s good side.” He brushed away the rest of Eren’s tears, kissing his cheek. “Now get ready for bed.”
Eren nodded and got up. Walking over to Levi’s private bathroom. Levi sunk into the sofa, was this really it? Was this the last time he might see Eren?
He didn’t know how long he’d been sitting there, staring into nothing. Eren had come out, dress in his sleeping clothes and face washed.
“You’re not going to join me in bed?” Eren asked.
Levi shook his head. “I don’t think that would be a good idea. When your younger self wakes, it’ll be strange enough that he’d in my bed, let alone that he’d sleeping with his superior.”
Eren frowned. “I suppose your right. What are you going to tell him?”
“That he hit his head while training and I’ve been keeping an eye on him.”
Eren nodded and crawled into the bed on the other side of the room. Levi started to clear up the cups.
Levi bit his lip to stop himself from saying how he felt, to stop himself for telling Eren that he loved him.
“Goodbye Eren, I’ll see you again in your world that’s empty of titans.” Levi said, his lips unturned in a small smile.
“I’ll search for you, Levi. Even if I look insane, I’ll find you.” Eren closed his eyes and within seconds his breathing had steadied. He was asleep.
Levi didn’t know how he’d fallen to sleep so quickly, he walked over to the bed and knelt down besides Eren, carefully sweeping the hair from his face. He kissed Eren lips for the last time.
~ * ~ * ~ * ~
When Eren opened his eyes, he was stood in the dark abyss. Only this time he could hear the shouts and pleading of his loved ones. The darkness clung to him, suffocating so. All that Eren could see what his own body, which gave off its own light. He what he thought could only be light.
He turned around, fully knowing he was sleeping. It was strange. He’d had lucid dreams in the past but not to this extent.
“Hello?” He shouted into the darkness.
Nothing, no even an echo back. It was as if his voice had been swallowed.
He started to walk, it was the only thing that he could do.
Walk and wait for someone to start calling his name.
He thought about the day that he’d spent with Levi. He hadn’t known that the older man could be so sweet, it was by far the best date that Eren had ever been on and would probably be the best date he’d ever go on.
Because that was the thing now. Eren’s heart and head was filled of Levi. Somehow, he’d fallen in love with the man, it had only been a couple of days but with his memories of the past it felt as if he’d been in love with him for years.
It hurt. It hurt so much.
“Oi, you” a voice shouted. It sounded strange, like a recording. “Don’t walk away, I’m talking to you.”
Eren turned around and standing there was….it was him. Dressed in his military garb, the younger man with the unruly chocolate brown hair frowned.
“What the hell?” Eren whispered.
“That’s what I should be saying, you finally hear me then?” The younger man snarked.
“You’re me, the other me.”
Other Eren rolled his eyes, “Yeah, that’s right, I’m the Eren who’s body you stole.”
Eren rubbed the back of his neck nervously. “How much did you see?”
Other Eren shrugged. “Enough, though I’m guessing I’m not going to remember much. You never do when you wake up, we’ve spoken before you know.”
Eren blinked in confusion. He was sure he’d remember talking to a past self. This was just unreal. This must be a dream.
“Last time you were going to go back but you were pulled away again. I don’t like it here. I want to go back, I don’t like being stuck in this darkness.” The other Eren’s eyes looked hollow and scared/
Eren couldn’t help but feel guilty and somewhat responsible for the boy as he hugged his arms around himself.
“I’m sorry. This time I won’t be pulled away. You can go home now.”
The other Eren nodded his head and pointed into the distance. “I heard Mikasa shouting you, over in that distance. She sounded like she was crying.”
Eren bit his lip and walked over to the other him. He looked down at the slightly shorter boy with the dark bags under his eyes. The haunted look of someone who had seen too much. Eren pulled his younger self into a hug.
“Even if you don’t remember any of this, I want you to try your best to be there for your friends, for Levi. Save as many people as you can. Eradicate all the titans.”
Eren felt the shorter boy wrap his arms around his waist. It was a strange feeling hugging your former self, something that Eren would never have imagine would be possible.
A whisper of his name in the distance brought his attention away. The other Eren pushed him away.
“Go, before it’d too late.”
Eren took two steps back, looking at the other Eren one more time before he turned and ran in the direction that Mikasa’s voice was calling him from.
A small light could be seen in the darkness, a beacon calling him. He reached out towards it.
The other Eren smiled and turned around before disappearing as a flash of light illuminated the darkness.
Blurry eyes opened as Eren took a look around the unfamiliar room. Someone was sat in a chair next to the bed, their dark hair hiding their face. Eren shifted in the bed, alerting the person.
Shocked blue eyes stared back at him.
“Captain, what am I doing in your bed?”
I'm not crying, you're crying.
Drop me a message. let me know if I've broken your heart.
“He’s awake!” She shouted, her voice reverberating round the sparse living room. Her whole body seemed to vibrate as she held her phone to her chest. Her feet bouncing on the ground, causing her red hair to spring up and down in it’s bunches.
The smell of coffee was strong in the air as a tall blond man poured himself a cup of the steaming dark stuff. He smiled tiredly at his wife.
“It’s 5 am, Iz. Maybe keep it down a bit. Our guest is still sleeping.” He said.
“But, Far! He’s woken up, his mum just called me” She grinned, stealing the cup of coffee that Farlan had just made for himself.
He sighed and pulled out another cup from the stand.
“Pour me one too, Farlan. Why is Isabel shouting so loudly, so early?” His tone was dark but they knew him well enough to know that he was only joking.
His dark hair was perfectly styled in an undercut, his clothing simple and black but anyone with eyes could tell how expensive the look was. It was most certainly not the ‘I’ve just rolled out of bed’ style that it may be perceived as.
“My best friend, the one that was in a hit and run, he’s just woken up from his coma.” Isabel said, wiping tears from her eyes. “It’s been six months, they said he wouldn’t wake up, I’m so happy.”
Farlan pulled his shorter wife into a hug and patted her hair.
“I told you he’d be fine, Eren’s the most persistent little shit I know.”
Levi felt a small twinge in his chest at the exchange. His heart sped up a little, but he otherwise dismissed it as being cranky from lack of caffeine.
“I thought I was your best friend” He teased.
Isabel smiled. “I can have more than one best friend, Levi. He’s my work, best friend. I was going to bring him to your gig, remember, the accident was two days before.”
Levi grabbed his mug off the side and took a sip, making no facial expression at the bitter taste.
“Oh, that friend, the cute one with the horrible sense of humour?” Levi said. Though Levi had never met him, he’d heard loads about him from Isabel and Farlan. It was almost as if he knew Eren, that was how much they talked about him.
“I’m going to get dressed, Levi, come with me to the hospital” She demanded, hand cocked on her hips. “You haven’t got practice, right?”
“Week off for your birthday, as requested. The band or my manger won’t be bothering us.”
Isabel grinned and ran off up the stairs.
“I can’t believe she’s thirty, acts like a thirteen year old.” Levi grumbled.
Farlan laughed and came to sit next to him on the little breakfast table. “ Maybe it’s because you act so old, Levi, you’re only twenty-six, or did you forget.” Farlan messed up Levi’s hair with his hand.
“As if I’d forget my age, dumbass.” He complained as he smoothed down his hair again.
Farlan smiled sadly.
Levi sat in Isabel’s beat up Nissan Micra, She could afford a new car, but she’d had the same one since passing her driving test and refused to get another. No matter how much work it had to have over the years.
It was spacious and clean, so Levi didn’t really care.
Isabel had insisted that he come with her. He’d even bought his guitar with him after arguing about his identity for the past twenty minutes.
Isabel had said that her work friend was trustworthy and even though he was a fan, he wasn’t insane and Isabel had every intention of making them all friends, so there wasn’t much point in hiding his face.
Levi couldn’t really deny Isabel anything though, she was like his older sister. She looked after him when his mother had passed away when he was eighteen, she had supported him in his music career and she’d always been there for him. She’d happily became best friends with a brat four years younger than her when they were children and Levi had moved into the apartment next to hers.
Isabel parked in her usual staff parking spot and got out the car. She beckoned to Levi, who followed her, swinging his guitar bag onto his shoulder.
“Eren’s in the west wing, his parents are loaded so they forked out for a private room.” Isabel said as she locked the car. “Should we have brought flowers? I feel like we should have brought flowers.”
“Maybe some grapes, wow, what a bad best friend you are. No flowers, no grapes. I’d put you up for adoption.” He joked.
Isabel scoffed and gave Levi a light shove as she pressed the lift button and waited. “Rude.”
Levi rolled his eyes. “I’ll pop down to the gift shop and buy some. They’ll probably be shit though, what does he like?”
“I don’t know, we haven’t talked about our favourite flowers, he likes green though.”
They stepped into the elevator, Isabel pushing the button for the third floor and first floor.
“Well that helps, he likes green.” Levi folded his arms. “Why don’t I just buy all of them, fill the place. Gotta get something he likes that way”
“Low profile, Levi, remember.” The floor dinged and Isabel stepped out. “He’s in room 104, see you later.”
The doors closed, Levi lent back against them and sighed. He knew that Isabel was up to something fishy, he was betting that she was trying to hook him up with this ‘Eren’ guy. He’d never seen a picture of the guy, Isabel insisted he was cute and apparently talented, being on the road to being one of the top doctors in the hospital and only a student.
Levi didn’t really do well with relationships, they all seemed to end in less than four months, that’s all the time it took for Levi to realise they weren’t right. Well, two months really, the other two were him trying to meet the person face to face and actually dump them.
The doors opened, and Levi stepped out of them, he’d been to this hospital a few times over the years, but didn’t really like visiting it. It reminded him of death too much.
He made his way to the little gift shop he knew was near the doors. It was probably only the size of his living room but had so many things in. It was well planned out, chocolate bars close to the tills, flowers out side the door so people could pick them up as they were walking by and everything you could need from deodorant to teddy bears.
Levi saw a bear in a balloon and chuckled at the thought of what the bear would look like once the helium started to disappear.
He picked up a bunch of flowers, they looked like big daisies, would they be alright? He frowned, his face only slightly changing as it always looked like he was pissed no matter what he did. He picked up another bunch, it was a strange bunch, but Levi felt they’d be fitting. Sunflowers, bluebells and those large white daisy things.
He stepped up to the till, the greying-blond man in front of him was too tall for Levi’s tastes. He couldn’t even see the till around the huge man with the German accent as he picked up what looked like one of every chocolate bar.
“You must have a sweet tooth, sir.” The server joked with him.
“They’re for my son, he’s craving chocolate, shhh, don’t tell anyone I’m sneaking them in for him.” The man whispered in a staged manner. The cashier laughed.
Levi had a feeling the old German man, that was too tall, had probably winked at her.
The man moved to the side for the next customer as he filled his bag with chocolaty goodness. It made Levi crave a crème egg but easter had already passed and nowhere seemed to be stocking them.
“Just these.” Levi said as he put the flowers down carefully on the side. “Can I pay with my phone?” He asked.
The blond man had frozen in putting his chocolate bars away, his back still to Levi.
“No sir, we don’t have contactless.” The cashier said politely. “It’s £14 for those.”
Levi raised an eyebrow at the extortionate price and pulled out his wallet, reaching for a twenty. He handed it over.
The blond German had turned towards him now, his eyes wide. Levi thought his huge eyebrows were going to fly off his face, they were raised so high.
Levi pocketed his change and grabbed the flowers.
“What you looking at, Eyebrows?” Levi snarked.
The man gapped. “Mein Gott. Levi?”
Levi frowned. “Do I know you?” He asked. He was sure he’d remember a huge blond with massive eyebrows, so he was sure he’d never seen this guy before.
“Oh, I guess not.” He smiled a small sad smile. Levi felt a little twinge go off at the back of his ear. “We met a long time ago, perhaps you don’t remember. I’ve Erwin.” He held out his hand to shake.
Levi shook it out of habit. His small hand, swallowed.
Levi retracted his hand and frowned. “How long ago, ‘cause I don’t remember. We’re you friends with my mum or something?”
Erwin smiled. “Yes, yes I was.”
Levi nodded and shifted from foot to foot, suddenly nervous.
“Are you visiting someone?” Erwin asked politely.
“Yeah, my friend Isabel dragged me along.” Levi said. “I should probably get up to the room, waiting on the flowers.” Levi said, waving them slightly.
“Oh yes, sorry to keep you, I should get going too.”
“Your son needs his chocolate fix, huh.” Levi commented.
Erwin gave him that sad smile again, looking at him as if someone had died. He nodded. “Yes, it was nice seeing you again, Levi.” He reached into his wallet and pulled out a business card, handing it to Levi. “If you want to meet up for a coffee sometime, I’m sure my wife would appreciate it, she knew your mother too.”
Levi looked down at the card as the older man walked away, his shoulder slumped.
Erwin Smith, Survey Corps Gaming
Levi’s hand gripped the card, almost crumpling it. He pocketed it and rubbed his chest, his heart was pounding, his chest felt heavy. He didn’t like this feeling, like something was trying to break free.
Erwin was already gone, when Levi regained his composure.
He walked over to the elevator, waiting for it to come back down before getting in and pressing the floor for level 3. He stood to the back, clutching the flowers to his chest carefully.
He didn’t feel right.
He stepped out of the lift and walked the way that he’d seen Isabel go, passing by the doors, finding his way to 104. His heart was beating heavily in his chest, thumping away so harshly that he thought he could feel the necklace that he always wore, clunking against his chest. He grabbed the ornate key, tied on a string and took a deep breath. He steppHe
He didn’t understand what was happening, he felt more nervous than he had in his life and he sung in front of thousands of people for a living.
What was this feeling?
His legs took him to where he needed to go. Room 104.
There was a small opening in the blinds, giving him a small view of what was inside. Someone had probably moved them trying to look outside. Levi’s curiosity got the better of him. He peeked into the spacious room….and felt his heart skip a beat, if that was possible.
A man with chestnut brown hair and eyes the colour of the ocean was sitting in the bed, surrounded by the smiling faces of Isabel, Erwin and a dark-haired woman or Asian descent.
His heart pounded again as the man laughed slightly, fiddling with his fringe that almost covered his eyes.
Levi’s throat constricted, the flowers dropping from his hands, sounding out a quiet thump. Petals dropped from the stems, he’d carried them so carefully too.
He raised a hand to his mouth and doubled over in shock, trying not to throw up what little he had eaten this morning.
The name flashed through his body with a sudden heat, scolding his veins and making his head pound in pain. He tried to take a deep breath but was overcome.
“Eren?” Levi asked with a cough, the blood drippling from his mouth.
The boy’s head on his chest was limp, he couldn’t feel the breath against his skin anymore.
“Eren…I love you.” Levi bit the inside of his cheek as a sob wracked through his body. “I love you so much, I’ll find you, I….” His breath rattled in his chest. “I’ll…remember…I’ll… find-“
Levi’s hand on the wall stopped him from fully falling over as he collapsed to one knee with a sob.
“Eren, I forgot, oh god, Isabel, I’m so sorry.” Levi whispered, looking down at the ruined flowers that he’d somehow put his hand through.
His head was pounding. He sat back on his hunches and took deep hurried breaths. Have been the trigger that Eren had told him about all those years ago.
The door opened, Isabel stepping out. She looked down at Levi on the floor, quietly closing the door she rushed over to him.
“Are you okay? What’s wrong?” She asked, putting a hand on his shoulder.
“Isabel…I didn’t remember, I’m sorry, I didn’t remember.” Levi bit his lip to stop himself from crying.
Isabel gasped, falling to her knees in front of him. “Big bro?” She asked uncertainty.
Levi nodded. “I remember, Is”
Levi’s arms were suddenly filled with the harry bouncy girl. She squeezed him too hard but he didn’t seem to mind.
“What, how, when?” She rambled.
Levi hugged her back. “I know him.”
Isabel frowned. “You mean, Erwin, don’t worry, he’s really nice. I’snt upset about the whole ‘us trying to assassinate him’ at all.” She pulled back and grinned wiping away a stray tear.
Levi shook his head. “No, well yes, I do know Erwin but the other male in the room, that’s who I know, Eren. My Eren.”
Isabel gaped. “I’m sorry, Your Eren?”
She jumped to her feet and grabbed her bunches. “He never told me, oh god, what if he doesn’t know, what if he doesn’t remember? I mean, you got your memories back from looking at him....Your Eren.” She rambled.
Levi stood, picking up the flowers which drooped him his hand, some of the stems broken and flowers hanging off. He flattened his hair and tried his best smile, which was a little frightening.
“He remembers. I’m going in, I’m going in, yes, going in.” Levi said, flattening his hair again.
He hadn’t seen Eren in years, he hadn’t had a boyfriend in years, he hadn’t been in a real relationship in any of his lives, he was nervous as fuck! What if Eren didn’t want him anymore, what if he’d found someone new?
Isabel took charge, she opened the door to the hospital room and pushed Levi though.
The three people in the room, startled from their chat, stared at the short man dress all in black, holding a bunch of broken flowers.
“Flowers” Levi said dumbly. “I got them, I mean, for you, the flowers.”
Mikasa stood from her seat, tears in her eyes. Erwin but a hand on her arm.
Levi remembered that they were married, Eren was there son. The son with a sweet tooth apparently, by the twix wrapped on the pull out table.
“They’re a little broken.” Levi continued. “I dropped them, I may have also put my hand through them but I was kind of out of it when I did-”
“They’re probably still good-“
“You’re right I should get new ones.”
“Corporal, pull yourself together!” Erwin commanded.
Levi stood to attention out of habit before slumping and turning to glare at Erwin. “Fuck you and your eyebrows.”
“Levi, “ Eren cried. “You remembered”
Levi marched over to Eren, not caring about the audience they had of the fleck of chocolate that was stuck to Eren’s lips. He put the flowers down in front of Eren, putting his guitar case on the floor. He sat on the bed and pulled Eren into a hug.
“I told you, I’d find you, you damn brat”
He kissed Eren firmly on the lips, the years that he had spend bottling up his emotions with the other Eren started to meld away with the feel of soft lips on his. Eren gasped into the kiss.
Erwin coughed slightly.
They broke away, Levi glanced over at Erwin, his cheeks red.
“I’m going to date your son.” Levi stated leaving no wiggle room.
Mikasa smiled and pulled her gaping husband by the arm. “Come on, lets give them some privacy.” She motioned Isabel out the room. Looking back she smiled at Eren and Levi, finally together.
“I’m so glad you remembered Captain, oh, and I’m a big fan of No Name, I’d love some tickets.” She grinned and sashayed out the room.
Eren glanced at the exchange curiously, Mikasa seemed to get along with Levi a lot better than she had in the past.
“No Name?” Eren asked with a frown.
Levi smiled, pulling his legs onto the bed to lay beside Eren. “It’s a long story, but I think we have a while.”
The noise in the room was deafening, as Eren stood in the middle of a crowd of screaming teenager. Isabel and Farlan stood on either side of him, Isabel wolf whistling as the supporting band packed up their stuff and got off the stage.
The room was smaller than what Eren had been expecting, only a couple of hundred people could possibly fit into this room, with its lofty ceilings and compact walls. The door behind him lead out to a larger room with a long bar, where Isabel had tried to drown him in cocktails. As soon as he’d managed to finish one, another was being thrust his way by the red haired girl.
The room was dark, only mood lighting and the occasional spotlight from the stage illuminated the room. Eren could see the phones of teens and adults alike being thrust into the air, camera on as the main attraction made their way onto the stage.
Isabel screamed next to him, waving her hands in the air. Farlan flung his arm over Eren shoulder and grinned at him, waving his beer bottle. Eren shook his head, he didn’t want another one. He wanted to be at least a little sober to enjoy this.
A tall blond man stepped out first, waving at the crowd with his drumsticks in hand. His face was completely covered by bandages, sporting a black suit with the tie loosely draped around his neck. He sat down behind and drum-set and started to beat out a random tune as the next member of the band joined.
A dark haired woman, wielding a guitar, her eyes were also covered with bandages, that were almost falling off her face. She too wore the same black suit, her tie looking as if she’d tried to undo it and got bored half way through. She placed the guitar strap around her neck and grabbed the microphone.
“How are all my lovely fans doing tonight!?” She shouted out.
Eren almost covered his ears at the screams that answered her back. The guitarist nodded in answer and strummed.
“For those of you that don’t know us, I’m H and on the drums we have M-“ M, gave a little tab of his symbol and sniffed with a smile. “-we also have your favourite short person here tonight, L!”
The crowd went wild, the screaming and shouting of teenage girls was making Eren’s ears ring but he couldn’t help but join in as the singer came onto the stage. His suit was crisp, his tie perfectly straight. He gave a little kick to H as he walked by, she dodged him with a grin as he took over the microphone.
“Good Evening, you pigs.” L said, adjusting the height of the microphone.
Eren screamed as loud as he could, his cheeks darkening in embarrassment as the faceless man looked in his general direction. Isabel clutched his arm and wolf-whistled. He saw a shirt fly over the crowd, almost reaching the stage before it flopped down into the masses.
“I hope that wasn’t aimed at me.” L said with a sneer. Taking on the full persona of the bastard singer. He grinned into the crowd. “Now, before the show really starts I have something to discuss with you guys. You’re hearing it here first, even though its been tipped off to the media already.” He spoke softly.
Eren blushed, a tingling feeling going down his arms, making the hairs stand on end in a pleasant way. The crowd had gone oddly quite as the spoke amongst themselves, taking of internet rumours.
“There’s rumours that I’m dating, and it’s getting pretty serious. Well, they’re all true-“The crowd shouted, L cut them off with a finger to his lips. “-and it’s a little more than serious. Last week I proposed.”
There was a short pause in the atmosphere, A wave of trepidation took over Eren and just as quickly it dispersed as the crowd elapsed into screams of congratulations and asking when the wedding was going to be. Some raised their plastic cups high into the air, Eren could see a few making snide remarks, not too pleased about the singer’s sudden engagement.
“I know that it might seem sudden, sure we’ve only been dating for two months technically. But it sure as hell doesn’t feel like that and believe me when I say that I’m getting the better deal.-“ Screams cut him off but he raised his hand to the crowd and continued to talk. “No really, he’s going to be a fan-fucking-tastic Doctor and when I’m old and my voice is shit, he’s gonna take care of me with sexy sponge baths and massages….you can’t see my eyes but I’ve just winked at you.”
Eren’s face was warming more and more as L went on, no as Levi went on. He fiddled with the engagement ring on his finger and smile. Isabel grabbed his arm, looking down at her he could see that she was full out crying. Eren smiled and ruffled her hair.
Levi continued his monologue. “I’ve been waiting for him forever, I’m being serious, I’ve been waiting a lifetime and a half to meet him. So I thought, what the heck. Let’s get married, you never know what’s going to happen and how much time you have with the ones you love. You could be hit by a bus tomorrow, you could eat bad clams and die-“
“You could be eaten by a titan!” a scream from the back of the room sounded. Eren turned in shock but couldn’t see over the throngs of people.
Levi pointed into the crowd. “Exactly, screaming potato girl. You keep that bald man of yours close.”
Eren’s heart was beating hard against his chest as he jumped on the spot to try and see where Levi was pointing. He could barely make out the top of a brunette girl, who was choke holding a man a head taller than her and pointing at the stage.
“This song is new and I’d like to dedicate it to the 104th squad, you were all little shits.” The beat started up behind Levi as he swayed, looking straight into the crowd at Eren as he started to sing. “It’s called Reluctant Heroes.”
I hope you enjoyed my story,
If you're wondering, Levi had to get Erwin's permission to marry Eren and he said no, till Mikasa convinced him it was alright.