Actions

Work Header

Rating:
Archive Warning:
Category:
Fandom:
Characters:
Additional Tags:
Language:
English
Series:
Part 18 of Earth 25: Oh, Yeah I'm An Ugly Mess
Stats:
Published:
2017-07-27
Completed:
2017-08-25
Words:
5,902
Chapters:
4/4
Comments:
4
Kudos:
7
Hits:
166

These Unsilent Nights

Summary:

The Outsiders were disbanded over a year ago after Batman's death. Toby wants to reform it with a new group of heroes.

Notes:

Tw for mentions of death and parental abuse.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: All You Have Is Your Fire

Chapter Text

Toby and Duke were sitting on the couch playing Mario Kart, Duke was winning. Toby’s movements were more clumsy and less practiced at Mario Kart than the games he usually played, mostly Overwatch and Wii Sports with Kon. It was good to be back, to be able to hang out with Duke and Cass, train with Jason and Luke. He hadn't gone back on the streets yet, but he was going to soon. He wanted to be ready.

 

Cass had given him an idea a few days back, one he'd been mulling over in his mind. She'd commented on the fact that the Outsiders were disbanded, that the members had all left to do something else after Bruce had died. She'd said their base was still empty, that it was mostly being used for storage these days. Since then Toby had been talking to Dick and Babs, asking if he could use the base for a team. There’d been some mild surprise, but they’d both said it was better than it sitting empty. The facilities were fully functional and if he was willing to move everything out then it was his.

 

“Hey, Duke, we should restart the Outsiders together,” Toby said.

 

Duke’s movements halted and he spun off the course, Toby using the opportunity to slide ahead. Toby came in 3rd place, which was much better than his usual last place in Mario Kart.

 

“You can’t be serious,” Duke said.

 

“C’mon, it’ll be fun and we can do great work,” Toby said, lightly shoving Duke’s shoulder.

 

“Lemme think on it,” Duke said, his voice was calm and even.

 

“You’re a fantastic leader, you’re the brains to my brawn,” Toby said, smiling wildly.

 

Duke nodded and they started playing the game again, Duke winning the next round.

 

“I’m going to try getting everyone together, please get back to me. We could use a leader,” Toby said.

 

“I'll think about it. I should probably head out, I wanna get some sleep before patrols tonight,” Duke said, grabbing his backpack.

 

“You're gonna consider it, right?” Toby asked, pausing the game.

 

Duke hummed, “I will. Who are you thinking about?”

 

“Miss Martian, Bumblebee, the Ray, Lightning, Speedy, the new Green Lantern, and Canary,” Toby said.

 

“Bumblebee? The Ray? Wait didn't you date Bumblebee?,” Duke said.

 

“I did and we're still friends. Ryan’s super cool,” a smiled played on Toby’s face, the same one he got when he was formulating a plan.

 

“I’ll think about it,” Duke said.

 

“Get back to me soon, I need to find a leader. I'm leaving tomorrow to recruit everyone, I haven't seen a lot of them for a while and I don't know Milagro super well… or the Ray,” Toby scratched the back of his head, he figured he could bank on at least some of them being willing to join.



Toby stepped off the plane, he was in Vanity, Oregon. Talia was working on a business deal in Vanity. Toby had accompanied her, they were staying in Oregon for two days. Toby shielded his eyes from the sun, he wasn't quite used to. Gotham was in a perpetual overcast.

 

“Why'd you want to come to Vanity with me? You usually find businesses boring and avoid things like this,” Talia said, putting on her sunglasses. She had perfected looking like a high society tech CEO, down to her expensive tastes and propensity for looking like she'd just stepped off a runway even after a 6 hour flight.

 

Toby on the other hand looked disgruntled, his sunglasses were falling off his nose, both of hands were jammed into an oversized hoodie that he'd stolen from Kon. The CEO of the company Talia was meeting with had met them at the the airport. She looked equally as sharp as Talia did and for a brief moment Toby wondered if people in Talia’s circle ever didn't look runway ready.

 

“Sarina Anders, so happy to finally meet you. I'm very interested in your company’s light based technology,” Talia said, moving her purse up on her arm until it sat in the crook of her elbow. She shook Dr. Anders’ hand. “This is my nephew, Toby Head.”

 

Dr. Anders stretched out her hand and Toby took it, shaking it succinctly and flashing a practiced smile.

 

“Nice to meet you, Toby. I can see you're a shoes guy like my brother,” Sarina said. Toby froze for a second, wondering how she could've guessed before he realized he was wearing the shoes Talia had given him for his birthday.

 

“Yeah. Aunt Talia got these for me for my birthday,” Toby said.

 

Sarina smiled and resumed her conversation with Talia. Toby zoned out until they reached the hotel. Traveling with Talia meant they were staying in a place that felt like if you so much as sneezed you'd tarnish the place. Talia checked in while Toby watched their luggage, she had a dinner meeting in three hours, leaving Toby to try and recruit the Ray.

 

Toby suited up and headed out, using his grappling hook to navigate the city. It was only his third putting on the suit, but he found it was easier to move in than he'd thought. It was fitted to his measurements, his new ones after he'd put on some muscle in Russia. Swinging from roof to roof came easily and soon he’d found the Ray, he was hanging out on a roof in downtown Vanity, seemingly checking his phone.

 

“Hey!” Toby yelled, quickly pausing to check his voice. He'd sounded more hostile than he wanted. “I'm Redwing!”

 

“Vanity doesn't really need more than one hero,” the Ray said.

 

“I'm not from Vanity. I'm from Gotham, I came to Vanity to recruit you to a team. The Outsiders, we need some people,” Toby said, he didn't notice he was gesturing weirdly, his hands all over the place, until the Ray gave him a weird look, quirking one eyebrow. Toby returned his hands to his sides in a lightning fast motion.

 

“Okay,” the Ray said.

 

“What? That easy? No negotiations or anything?” Toby asked.

 

“No, I need friends and you need me so, give me the date and time and I'll be there,” Ray said.

 

Toby nodded, pulling out his phone. He handed it to Ray and waited as Ray put in his number.k

 

“I'll be in touch,” Toby said, sending Ray a one handed salute and using his grappling gun to get off the building.

 

He mentally checked off one name on his list, the Ray was going to be on the team.

 


 

Toby texted Mia and Ryan when he got to his hotel room, sending them each a quick “Forming a team, you in?” before stripping out of his suit and putting on a pair of comfortable pajamas. He channel surfed for a good 10 minutes before deciding on Booster Gold’s appearance on Sesame Street, a rerun he remembered from when he was 6 or 7 and had thought Booster Gold and Sesame Street were the shit. He'd met Booster Gold, the observation had been shattered as soon as he'd fallen on his face.

 

Ryan was the first to respond.

 

To: birdy

From: ry guy

 

im in, gotta work it around school tho

 

To: ry guy

From: birdy

 

it'll be mostly weekends

 

To: birdy

From: ry guy

 

im in then, who do you have?

 

To: ry guy

From: birdy

 

the ray, maybe duke

 

Ryan sent a thumbs up emoji followed by a bumblebee.

 

Talia got back an hour after the end of Sesame Street. Her recount of the meeting was that it was boring and needlessly long. She'd had to talk to executives and make small talk, to cultivate relationships with them. She'd commented that there was only so much she could say about children who were boring other than for the fact that they were superheroes. Toby nodded when appropriate and at the end they both went to their separate rooms.

 


 

Toby’s mind felt like it was made of cotton, everything felt blurry and like he was a shadow of a person. There was pain radiating out from his ribs. He wasn't breathing.

 

Still he explored the world around him. His fingers twitched at his sides. All the people looked like shadows of their former selves, some looked blurrier, almost further away. A woman grabbed his hand, pulling him away from what he'd been looking at.

 

“Wh… where am I?” Toby asked, searching her face.

 

“You're Duke’s friend,” she said.

 

“You're… his mom? Mrs. Thomas,” Toby asked. Her face wasn't blank or filled with anger, she seemed happy.

 

Elaine Thomas looked beautiful. Her hair was pulled back, the edges of it bouncing as she moved. She was wearing a dress and her hamsa was around her neck. She looked at ease, gone was the turmoil and blind rage Toby had only ever seen her in. She looked at peace.

 

“Yes,” she said.

 

“You're not dead. I, I think I am,” Toby said. He tried to get his bottom lip to stop wobbling, but he couldn't quite do it.

 

“You are, sweetie,” her voice was smooth and comforting.

 

“How are you here if you’re not dead,” Toby asked.

 

“Because I'm not going to be able to come back, I'm never going to be me again. I'm between death and life,” she smoothed back Toby’s hair in a movement that felt comforting.

 

Toby wracked his brain for what he remembered about life and death. He knew that in the New Year god wrote your name in the book of life, he knew that there was sorta hell, but not really. That there was a place where any non-wicked person went and it wasn't eternal paradise or anything, just eternity.

 

“God, wrote your name in the book of life. You can return if you want to,” she said.

 

Toby paused, sucking in some breath before he nodded. He wanted to be alive again.

 

“Can you tell Duke I love him,” she asked. Her voice was hoarse, like the words were hard to say. “Tell my son I love him more than anything and I never want to hurt him.”

 

“I will,” Toby said. He couldn't imagine a parent loving their child that much, so much that they wanted their child to know they were loved. He'd never felt that.

 

“Thank you.”

 

“For what?” Toby hadn't remembered doing anything.

 

“For taking care of my son when I couldn't. For being his friend.”

 

Toby nodded. His chest felt too small for everything he was feeling, like someone had shoved the whole world into his ribcage. He wanted to go home. He wanted to go home. He wanted to bring Duke’s mom home to him.

 

Suddenly pain overwhelmed him. He breathed in, a shuttering noise as he felt something wet come out of his mouth, thicker than water or spit.

 


 

Toby woke up breathless. He put his head between his knees and tried not to sob, he made a couple broke noises before he wiped away the tears streaming down his face. He should call Duke. That… that didn't feel like a dream.

 

He didn't end up calling Duke, his good judgement got the better of him and he decided to walk around the hotel room. Talia was sitting at the counter.

 

“Can't sleep?” she asked.

 

Toby shook his head. “Had a weird dream. About… being dead.”

 

Talia nodded, her expression solemn. She understood.

 

“Would you like to discuss it?” Talia asked.

 

Toby shook his head. He grabbed a can of Zesti, opening it up and taking a long sip. He didn't want to talk about being dead. People seemed to think that being dead had traumatized him, but in a way it had given him closure. His mother had made it clear where she stood on him, that if he wouldn't be her legacy he would be dead. He wasn't her legacy. He was Jason’s, Luke’s, Talia’s, Nyssa’s. Those were the people he'd chosen, the ones who’d earned his trust.

 

He wanted to leave a legacy, he wanted to leave one and maybe that team was his legacy. He'd always wanted to be worth it, he'd been told he was worth something.