Actions

Work Header

Voice

Chapter Text

The first time Yaoyorozu had met Todoroki Shouto she was fifteen and constantly confused reality with dreams. That fateful day in the coffee shop when she accidentally bumped into him was like a scene from a cliché drama. 

She and her friend Jirou were unconsciously obstructing the door of the coffee shop after Yaoyorozu had pulled Jirou aside to comfort her. That day, Jirou had witnessed her boyfriend of months with another girl. At the time Yaoyorozu almost gave up on love like those of fairytales because the world seemed to continuously remind her of the merciless reality.

Maybe that's why Todoroki's kind smile and sincere apology had made her see him as prince charming. 

Despite being the one who blocked the door, Yaoyorozu received an apology from him. He had apologized because he understood that Jirou seemed to be troubled and that he didn't wish to interrupt their conversation. 

His voice was like music to Yaoyorozu's ears. It was deep and contained a nice husk but felt warm instead of threatening. His looks were top quality however the only thing Yaoyorozu could focus on was his eyes. They were two different shades that seemed to sparkle in the early sun. 

When their eyes met, it had felt like the whole world decided to stop for a few seconds. So, yes, it really had felt like a cliché scene from a drama. Probably the only reason why Yaoyrozu still thought about him even after 5 years had passed. 

"Don't you think it's about time for you to find someone for yourself?" Jirou asked pushing her hair back. They were sitting in the living room of her apartment. 

Momo tilted her head in confusion "Not really, why?" she asked. It was a topic they had talked about before but it always ended the same way. No conclusions. 

Jirou sighed, Momo had noticed her friend getting more annoyed every time the topic came up. 

"Momo, you're almost twenty-one and you've never been in a relationship before!" Jirou exclaimed, her frustration growing by the second.  

"Hey! there's nothing wrong with that" Yoyorozu pouted, she hated when Jirou brought up her age. It was true that at this age most people have been or are in a relationship with someone. For Momo, however, it was more about finding the right person through living her life. If it is meant to be she's sure that person would eventually show up. 

Jirou looked at her apologetically. "There's nothing wrong with that, it's just that I know you think someone might show up eventually at the right time. Of course, you might be correct but I don't think there is any harm in searching for that person as well. Because sometimes they might be so close that we lose sight of them." 

Yaoyorozu knew that Jirou had a point, she couldn't just sit down doing nothing and hope that someone would find her. If it was that easy then surely everyone in the world would be happy. "I know, I understand what you're saying. It's just sometimes I really wish they would arrive in front of me like a prince from a novel or a hero of a comic." 

She looked down at her feet feeling depressed about her own situation. Yaoyorozu felt stupid just by hearing her own words.

Jirou gave her friend a knowing look, "I don't even like those cliché things but even I wish that things like that would happen in reality." Jirou lazily rested her head on the sofa her eyes on the white ceiling. 

A smile formed on her lips when an idea started forming in her head that was usually filled with music. "Remember that dude you used to talk about," Jirou crossed her legs, her finger tapping her chin in thought. "what was his name again? Tokatsu? Tomoya? To-to-something?" 

Momo stared at her friend weirdly, Jirou usually thought of weird things that often got them in trouble. "Todoroki?" Yaoyorozu said despite herself, she was too curious about what her friend had to say. 

"Yeah him! I heard a rumor about a pretty boy who frequently visits this bar I know. They say he has unusual traits that fit Todoroki's appearance. " Jirou said, she's fully aware of how excited Yaoyorozu had become from the little information.

"Didn't you have a crush on him back in high school?" 

Yaoyorozu nodded, after the coffee shop incident she had found out that Todoroki attended a neighboring school. From there on he had started developing feelings for the boy by watching him from afar. She refused to call it stalking, it was merely an observation whenever she happened to be in the same place as him. 

Sadly she had never gotten the chance to talk to him and in their third year, he had disappeared from the face of the earth. That's why she was thrilled to hear that he might be back in town after such a long time. 

"Why don't you pay a visit to the bar, maybe you'll see him there?"

 

--------

 

Momo took a seat at the very corner of the bar, she was wearing a pair of glasses and the menu covered her face halfway. A hopeless attempt to not seem suspicious. She kept telling her self that she wasn't here because of what Kyouka had said and only because she wanted to try some alcohol.

She did, however, ask Kyouka where she got the information about Todoroki from. Jirou had only smiled and said It was a little bird. Yaoyorozu wasn't sure if it had been affection in Jirou's voice when she had answered but Momo would be happy if Kyouka had found someone. 

Yaoyorozu kept an eye on her surroundings, deep down she hoped to see Todoroki again. It had been almost four years since she last saw him when they were still teenagers. Now he would be a grown adult. Her heart does a little flip imagining how he would look.  

There's a sound of a door opening stopping her thoughts and her eyes travel to a guy with messy ash-blond hair. The ash-blond has a scowl on as he started shouting at the bartender. Her eyes widen in surprise by the lack of manner the man has. 

"Hey, old man, can you hand me something fucking strong!" The ash-blond said while throwing his legs on the counter. The bartender just sighed tiredly, he seemed used to this treatment. Yaoyorozu decided instantly that she didn't the boy's attitude.

"Bakugou, what happened this time?" The bartender asked. Momo was quietly watching them from her little corner noticing how calmly the elderly man kept cleaning glasses with a cloth.

The rude guy instantly swallowed the drink he got from the bartender in one gulp then slammed it on the counter making her jolt in her seat. "Thanks to fucking Deku, I had to leave the park because apparently, shout too much," the man puckered up his lips and started talking in a whiny way "It scares the kids." 

Momo assumed that he was imitating whoever it was that he called 'Deku'. The man continued his ranting to the bartender that just listened silently. "Fuck him, he always makes that half an' half idiot agree to his shit."

The bartender nodded to whatever the boy called Bakugou said. Most of the conversation one-sided about meaningless things that Yaoyorozu didn't understand. 

Suddenly another blond entered the bar, he had a darker shade of blond from that of the one called Bakugou. The guy immediately walked up to Bakugou and put his arm on his shoulder. He a little less fit than Bakugou but had this playboy look that practically screamed player. Yaoyorozu also noticed that there was something keen to a lightning stripe on his dark blond hair that made her wonder if it was natural or dyed.

"Bakugou!" he called for the ash blond with a bright smile on his features. "There you are, listen, you have to stop getting so mad all the time. You'll seriously grow wrinkles at this rate-"

Momo saw Bakugou furiously give him a glare that successfully made the other shut up. "fuck off Kaminari, I'm seriously not in the mood"

The playboy (as Momo judged) just shrugged and continued on with no care about the scary look given to him. "Anyway, Todoroki is about to head over here so why don't you try snatching him away from Midoriya? I'll gladly help" There's a barely noticeable tease in Kaminari's voice and Momo was starting to question if he was trying to hide something behind it.

Her head perked up at the mention of the familiar name. She didn't pry any further though, instead, she got distracted by Bakugou's crimson eyes. They were very beautiful. 

The ash-blond put down his drink and looked over at Kaminari. A smirk playing across the other's lips.

"Shit face- " Bakugou began, irritation bubbling inside him. Before he could continue the door opened again and this time Yaoyorozu looked up to finally meet the person she had been waiting for. Todoroki Shouto.

He walked in looking exactly like he did 5 years ago only a little more mature and Momo felt her breath hitching just slightly. He was wearing black jeans with a white button-up shirt that seemed a bit oversized. 

Beside him was another person with green hair, he looked to be almost the same height as Todoroki. Yaoyorozu liked his soft green eyes, his appearance felt more pleasant from those two previous guys.

Her eyes followed them until 'shit face' stood up from his seat beside Bakugou. He took two quick steps right up to Todoroki. Unconsciously Momo gripped the menu tighter when she saw how the blond was shamelessly flirting with her ex-crush. The blond lifted Todoroki's chin to look into his eyes as a form of flirting and Yaoyorozu didn't like it. 

"Todoroki, don't you think it's unfair that you spend so much time with Midoriya? What about us? How about you give us some alone time as well?"

It took all of Momo's will power in order for her to not walk right up to the playboy and punch him. Her blood boiled the moment she saw the uncomfortable expression on Todoroki's face. 

Despite her anger towards the blond and his bold actions, she couldn't help notice how Todoroki remained quiet. His expression although slightly uncomfortable didn't actually hold any other feelings. He seemed cold, emotionless and just a little dead.  

She was almost glad when Bakugou pushed the playboy away, that was until the ash-blond grabbed onto Todoroki instead. The Bakugou dude was more aggressive with his actions and slammed Todoroki onto the wall. It wasn't a too powerful push so it shouldn't have hurt much, at least Yaoyorozu hoped it didn't. 

Bakugou smirked as Todoroki tried to avert his eyes with no luck because the ash blond was determined to maintain eye contact. Todoroki made a small attempt at removing Bakugou's hand from his arm but it was futile. He just didn't seem to have any motivation for anything.  

Yaoyorozu had prayed that the green haired male would stop this absurdity happening in front of her. However, as he made his way to them he only leaned onto the wall with a small smile on his face. 

Momo had enough when she saw Todoroki's face twitch in the discomfort of the close proximity of him and Bakugou. She slammed down her menu on the table and went straight up to the boys, they immediately stiffened at the loud sound. 

Without thinking any further, she punched the ash-blond while at the same time grabbing Todoroki and making a run for it. The others were too preoccupied in their own shock to react, but from the pain, on her right hand, she knew that her punch didn't really affect the guy as much as she had hoped.

She heard shouting and curses coming from Bakugou all the way outside of the bar but that didn't stop her from running away with Todoroki. Maybe it had been the fear of losing her own life or perhaps the adrenaline just kept her going.

After a while of walking, she stopped to catch her breath almost forgetting Todoroki whose hand she was still holding. To her surprise, he was looking at her reddening hand which she had used to punch Bakugou.

Still, he didn't say anything to her and just remained quiet. She felt a little disappointed because Todoroki's voice was one of the main reasons she had come to like him in high school. 

His expression wasn't easy to read either, she would have been confused if not for the gestures he made. He was holding the injured part of her hand gently and looking up at her making her wonder if he was worried about her.

"Are you perhaps worried about this injury?" She found it weird as to why he would care for a stranger like her in the first place. Sure, they used to see each other around the town but they never really talked. Just a small acknowledgment at times from the nicking of the head at each other when passing by. 

He nodded then looked around until his heterochromatic eyes landed on a water fountain. Luckily for them, they had walked all the way to the nearby park that had fine decorations and useful stuff like a water fountain. 

He pulled her gently to the water fountain to cool off the redness forming on her knuckle. She could only stare as he treated her hand with the cool water. A blush started to form on her face but she was too focused on their hands touching to care. 

It took her years to come this far with her crush, she wanted to cherish it. 

After he had finished he got out a small notebook from his pocket, there was a pen attached to it that he pulled off. He began writing something on it then showed it to her when he was finished. 'Thank you for what you did earlier, you really saved me from them'

Momo stared at the note with confusion, why would he write instead of speaking directly? Yaoyorozu knew he could because she had listened to that sound for so long during high school. No stalking, of course. 

"N-no problem, what was that about, though?" She doesn't ask about it, preferring to tread cautiously. She was aware that it might have been a sensitive subject, so she decided to focus on the scar on his left eye. Momo didn't remember seeing it before he disappeared in their third year. Unfortunately, Momo felt that the scar might have had something to do with his disappearance. 

Todoroki shook his head, there was a very tiny smile on his lips that Momo thought she was just imagining in her desperation. 'Don't worry they're friends, it's just them being playful. I have to ask though, we've met before right?'

Momo had hoped deep down that Todoroki would not recognize her again. She wanted to make a better first impression. However, for her, it seemed that it was one bad impression after another. Especially considering she had just punched her crush's friend. She didn't really regret it. 

She was about to deny any possible relation that the two of them might have when she was stopped by a familiar voice. 

"Well, hello again punching princess, I think we have some unfinished business." 

 

Chapter Text

To say Bakugou katsuki was angry would be a total understanding. Not only did he get punched by a girl (which didn't really hurt) but she left with his precious belonging. Okay, maybe saying his is a little exaggerated since Todoroki had clearly rejected him by using 'a note'. Yes, he had officially been rejected by the use of pen and paper because his so-called crush had been refusing to speak for five years now.

Bakugou wasn't angry about it, of course, he missed Todoroki's voice, but he would never force the other to speak. Not ever. At least not after having witnessed Shouto with a knife at his throat. He shuddered at the thought.

Bakugou already made a promise to himself that he would protect the vulnerable guy hidden behind that expressionless mask. Maybe the promise was one side but Katsuki would be damned if he ever broke it.

And yet despite it, Shouto was not in his hands. Carelessly Bakugou had let him get dragged away by a total stranger. The worst part was that Katsuki was too distracted because of the punch he received by a girl. He didn't disrespect girls in any way and if the punch had actually hurt he would blame it on the pain that had made him hesitate. But, no, Bakugou let Shouto go because the girl was gorgeous and Todoroki never spoke with any girls.

Katsuku ran outside of the bar as fast as he could with Kaminari and Deku trailing behind him. The scowl on his face was increasing by the second and Shouto was no where to be found. This wasn't healthy for his short temper.

He thought about all the possible ways to kill the strawberry shortcake guy. Of course, Todoroki had done nothing wrong this time, in fact he never really did. The guy was just way too innocent in his own way and that fueled his anger even more. If that girl tried to kill him, katsuki was afraid that Shouto would let her do it.

He hated babysitting Todoroki. At the same time no matter how many times he told himself to just walk away, he would come right back.

After running for a while he started searching frantically for the two of them. Although he wouldn't admit it, Bakugou was worried about Todoroki. Girls could be scary too with their long nails and sharp tongues. It wasn't like guys were the only ones to do terrible things.

What did Bakugou know? For all he knew it could have been a cross dresser. He doubted it though, the person had curves like that after all.

When he found the two of them standing beside a water fountain, he felt the relief wash over him at the sight of Shouto's wellbeing. It took him a moment or two before he noticed their intertwined hands and Todoroki holding hers ever so sweetly.

He continued to watch as Todoroki grabbed his notebook and started writing something down. If it wasn't for Midoriya and Kaminari holding him back, he might as well have drowned the girl right there because he was jealous.

As pathetic as it sounded Bakugou honestly didn't care, he had known the guy for like what? 10 years? It took forever for him to earn Todoroki's trust, yet this girl comes and just snatches him right underneath their noses.

Katsuki would never admit the pang of hurt he was feeling was the cause of his anger.

He held in a deep breath then removed Midoriya and Kaminari's hands off of him. They complied perhaps because they noticed him calming down slightly. Probably concluding he wasn't about to kill the girl yet.

Bakugou walked up to the two and said the first thing that came to mind, he regretted nothing.

"Well hello punching princess, I think we have some unfinished business"

He felt such a satisfaction from watching her face fill up with dread the moment she noticed him standing right beside them. He smiled at her ever so sarcastically hoping to make her feel even more terrified.

The girl is about to say something as he watched her eyebrows furrow in anger. There's a glare directed towards him that told him she obviously didn't like him. They shared the same sentiment.

He didn't let her continue instead grabbed onto her shirt and got uncomfortably close to her face. Bakugou unconsciously thought about her light weight and a part of him worried about her health. He didn't care though.

She made an attempt to struggle in his hold but Bakugou's grip was as tight as a snake's bite on its pray.

Midoriya and Kaminari didn't look to have any intentions of stopping Katsuki instead they walked up to Todoroki to check if he was okay. Bakugou hated that they were confident that he wouldn't hurt the girl. Maybe it was true but he still had to keep his act on.

Todoroki grabbed his arm and gave it a tight squeeze that suggested to Bakugou to let go. Katsuki wasn't going to just listen to him so he decided to give the other a furious glare.

"Fuck off Shouto, i'm going to kill her" he shouted angrily letting his frustration out. Katsuki wanted to pretend he didn't see the small flinch that Todoroki did when he shouted.

Todoroki only gave him a deadpan look that bordered on slight anger. Katsuki decided on letting go off the girl but accidentally shrugged away Todoroki who stumbled because of the force.

Katsuki was quick to react just as the other two were who quickly caught him before he fell. Katsuki watched as Midoriya gave the other a sweet smile. "Shouto you know how Kacchan doesn't listen when he becomes like that. . ." The green haired stopped to stare at the black haired beauty then back to Shouto "do you by any chance know the girl?"

Shouto nodded and stood up to whip away imaginary dust from himself. Todoroki knew the ash blond wouldn't dare to hurt the girl, but his threats were enough to scare most people.

Shouto walked up to her hesitantly looking for any injuries that Katsuki might have inflicted on her. He looked relived when the girl waved her hand insisting she was fine.

Bakogou wanted to shout at Todoroki who bowd his head down apologetically. Why did Todoroki have to apologise for something he did?

"Why the fuck are you getting in my way!?" It was a statement done out of anger more than anything else. He just hated everything about the guy. Why was he so kind to this girl? Why wasn't Shouto like this with him?

Katsuki gulped down the bile producing in his throat. He already made amends with this, he wasn't going through it again. Todoroki wasn't his, he never would be.

"Bro you seriously need to calm down for a sec, I know what she did was wrong but you kinda deserved it" Kaminari said, his hands crossed and a serious expression present on his face. Kaminari never liked to be serious.

Midoriya agreed following by saying "Y-you actually always deserve it with your attitude, but because it's okay with Shouto then it's fine for us as well. However, if he says no then you better s-stop instantly"

The freckled boy tugged his hair backwards taking a deep breath to speak up without the stuttering. "plus, he knows that girl and let's be honest just how many people do you think Shouto is willingly ready to admit being friends with?"

This had Bakugou shut up, he knew that Todoroki didn't actually have any friends except for them. Sometimes Katsuki liked to blame that fact on himself for scaring everyone who got near Shouto.

Katsuki thought he might have just messed up another one of his friendships. He hoped that it wouldn't give him a cold shoulder from Shouto for another long week to come, he hated that treatment.

"Tch, but it's her fault for punching me in the first place" Katsuki tried to reason but the look on Todoroki's face made him give up. He put his hands in his pocket and walked away from them. He knew he made a mistake.

Yaoyorozu turned to Todoroki when the ash blond left. She didn't understand the expression on Shouto's face but she quickly decided it wasnt pleasant.

Shouto started to write down something on his notebook 'I'm really sorry, I hope you can forgive Katsuki, he's usually a nicer person but sometimes he gets like that.'

Yaoyorozu smiled at him happily then shook her head to make a point. "No, no, I understand, even if he looked like he was going to kill me I'm sure he was just being protective of you . . ." her own words didn't really convince her but the way Shouto smiled at the sarcasm made her heart skip a beat. "A-and I did also punch him" she finished with a laugh.

'I'm not sure if you want to at this point, but it would be nice if we could be friends' His gaze wasn't on her when he wrote this, instead he was trying to hide his eyes under his overgrown bangs. There was a subtle redness to his cheeks and he was chewing on his lips nervously. 

Yaoyorozu smiled at him, this guy was going to be the death of her. "Aren't we already? Don't worry I'm not easily frightened so let's get along from now on"

When he lifted his head up Momo could practically feel him basking in his small achievement.

They exchange numbers and Yaoyorozu took notice of the sky. It had gotten dark, she didn't usually stay this long outside.

"hey Todoroki?" she tried to gain his attention. He looked at her with his two-coloured eyes and a puzzled expression that made her die a little bit inside. "It's getting late and I'll have to head home soon, however I think it is a bad idea to leave Bakugou like that. . . he's your friend, right? maybe you should talk it out?"

Todoroki gazed down at his notebook contemplating what to write down, it took a moment before he started to move the pen again. 'you're right, I guess I should. Thank you. But I didn't get your name?'

She smiled gently while shaking his hand. Yaoyorozu thought about how this meeting felt like more than just a coincidence. "Yaoyorozu Momo, you can call me Yamomo if you want"

------------

Bakugou walked down the road alone, it had gotten darker and the streets were never safe around this time. His mind however was too busy going through today's events.

He honestly didn't want to leave things undone like they had. Therefore he decided to just hang around hoping that at least pikachu or Deku would come. They usually told him what he should do in times like these.

His thoughts are interrupted when someone tapped his shoulder to gain his attention. Out of reflex Bakugou jumped away. He relaxed when he found out it is just the three idiots.

Katsuki wanted to apologize, unfortunately it was something he was extremely bad at. He tried getting the words out even if it was painfully hard. "hey. . . 'bout earlier, I'm sorry 'kay, I was mad and didn't think straight-" he said as he rambled on, he didn't get to finish as Todoroki stopped him with a hand up.

Shouto pushed his phone into Bakugou's face, he had written something on it instead of the notebook because it was too dark outside. 'It's okay . . . I'm sorry as well for not seeing things from your side'

It may be a strong word but Bakugou really did love Todoroki. Katuski was sure that by now everyone has realized this. Even so, he openly despised this side of Shouto.

He loathed the way Shouto always apologized for something that wasn't even his fault.

It was a habit Shouto took on when. They were kids, constantly apologizing for something even if it was trivial stuff. If Bakugou didn't know any better, he would get mad at the guy. He couldn't though.

Back when they were younger Katsuki wasn't aware of anything up until now. It was only recently he found out about everything that went down in that household.

Although Todoroki had become much better than before he still never showed interest in anything. He never resisted anything done to him and never laughed from the bottom of his heart.  And, for whatever reason. Shouto suddenly stopped talking as well. A lingering curiosity that Katsuki constantly pondered on because Todoroki was far away from that place. He should have gotten better, not worse.

Katsuki and the other two had asked him about what had happened. But, Shouto always started to tremble and refuse to ever open up to them. Eventually they gave up, not much of a choice as Shouto's fear ran deeper than they understood.

"For fucks sake I don't even wanna start with this!" Bakugou sighed rubbing his temple in annoyance. Todoroki just looked at him weirdly like he couldn't understand what Bakugou was saying.

Katsuki looked at Midoriya and Kaminari for help, the two had been silent the whole time, not finding a reason to talk. "Shouto. . . come here" He decided to take matters in his own hands.

The boy complied walking up to him without any hesitation at all. It only dawned on Shouto what he got himself into when Bakugou grabbed his waist with one hand pulling him closer. Katsuki then grabbed a fistful of Shouto's red and white hair pushing their lips harshly together.

Bakugou hummed unsatisfied when Todoroki didn't make any attempt to remove him, Katsuki liked being in control, but not like this.

The dual hair was having a hard time breathing, but Bakugou was waiting for the other to push him away.

He was just too frustrated to bother with his partners needs, he let his hands travel up Todoroki's oversized shirt. He noticed how the boy shivered under his control. It wasn't until a small barely audible whimper left the boy's throat that Bakugou moved away from him.

He caught the dual hair before he fell on his knees, Todoroki looked messed up. The other boy was panting his face red and sweat making his hair touch his skin seductively.

Bakugou wanted to try enjoying the tears in Shouto's eyes, call him sadistic or whatever. Despite it Kastuki hated that his point wasn't going through. "Why do you never resist? You hate it, push me away! Don't stand there and just take it!"

Todoroki only avoided his eyes.

He heard Kaminari whistle beside him watching the red and white hair struggling to gain control over his body again.

"Damn. . . Bakugou bro you sure know how to turn us on" Kaminari said jokingly. He knew that the blond just wanted to brighten the tense atmosphere.

"Fuck off Kaminari, he's mine for tonight" Katsuki liked to act all tough but in reality, he just wants to spend the night with Shouto  to hold.

Kaminari sighed there was no point arguing with bakugou when he got angry, sharing an opinion with Bakugou was impossible.

Midoriya was better since he liked to share his stuff. Easy to talk with, never got mad and always the reasonable out of the three of them. "Just make sure he gets home safely and don't even try anything funny" the blond replied.

Midoriya raised an eyebrow "You mean sex? I'm surprised none of you have done it yet"

"Fucking Deku! we made a deal and we ain't that shitty to break our end of the bargain!" Throughout this whole situation Todoroki silently listened still in Bakugou's arms.

He yawned soundlessly feeling the drain of today finally get to him, rubbing his eyes slowly he looked up to see all of them looking at him, Kaminari cood at his cuteness.

"Fuck he looks too good" 

Chapter Text

In all honesty, sharing was never really something Izuku thought twice about. If someone asked him for anything he would give it without even demanding a reason. Maybe it was in his nature or perhaps he learned from his mother's words "It's a give or take world, I hope you become one of those that gives".

Nevertheless, the moment he met Todoroki Shouto he couldn't help but feel a little greedy. Sometimes the guilt towards his mother was unbearable but deep down he knew that she would scold him for thinking like that.

"Kacchan, let him go" Midoriya said sternly. He didn't want to provoke Katsuki and it wasn't like him to stand up to someone. However, Izuku wasn't the type to just let things happen when he could prevent something unwanted.

Despite what Kaminari thought and often suggested, Izuku did not appreciate letting them invade his time with Todoroki. He especially hated it when Bakugou's hands were all over Shouto like that. Bakugou being his childhood friend (or rather bully) made his competitive streak grow even more.

He knew that the ash-blond was only trying to get his point through and while he liked to be aggressive with his actions Midoriya preferred to be patient and understanding.

"Yeah? What are you gon' do about it if I don't, Deku?" Midoriya could feel it in his bones the emphasis Katsuki put on the nickname Deku. It triggered an old rivalry between him and Bakugou, something that had always been there but only acted upon from Katsuki's side.

It ticked him how Katsuki called him that ever since they were kids, but like everything else with the ash blond, he wasn't allowed a say in it. Truthfully, Izuku never actually liked the deal they made about sharing the time they spend with Todoroki. It was an agreement made between Kaminari and Bakugou where his opinion on the matter wasn't cared for. He didn't like going against others, so he went along with it just like they expected him to.

Personally, he had never felt so grateful towards a person as he was in that moment when the girl punched Bakugou right in the face. Someone finally did one of the things he had always wanted to do but never had the guts to. All in all, Bakugou wasn't really the best person out there and Midoriya thought he deserved that punch, he thinks Kaminari deserves one too.

Izuku sighed, he wasn't in the mood to deal with Bakugou's anger as this was almost a constant in their lives. "I won't do anything, I'm just sick of dealing with you. Can't you ever respect his feelings?"

Bakugou grabbed Todoroki's hand to pull him up, the ash-blond then rested his head on Shouto's shoulder from behind. Izuku just silently watched as Bakugou used one hand to grab Shouto's chin to look straight at him while Katsuki's other hand slipped underneath his shirt.

Midoriya noticed the smirk on Bakugou's lips when he pressed them onto Shouto's neck trailing soft kisses up his skin. Izuku wanted to curse at the ash blond, he wanted to grab the bastard and choke him to death. The only reason he stayed silent was that Shouto was the one who let Katsuki touch him. As much as he hated to agree, Bakugou was right, Shouto needed to reject the other himself.

"Hey," Bakugou's voice was hoarse against Todoroki's skin. It didn't take any eagle eye to see the blush forming on Shouto's cheeks."Is it true? What broccoli is saying? I don't respect your feelings?" The ash-blond finished and Midoriya knew he was initiating Shouto to reject, to go against him but Shouto stayed silent.

Bakugou lifted Todoroki's chin upwards for more access to his neck. There was a smirk playing on his lips as he licked the weak spot he had memorized under Todoroki's ear. "come on now, why don't you answer Shouto?"

Midoriya was aware of what Katsuki was planning, he could see behind Katsuki's shit-eating grin. He could see it in the other's crimson eyes that underneath all this act, Katsuki was worried. He was worried about the mute guy, worried about his well being, his emotional distress and his nature to not resist anything. Dare he say it, Midoriya saw that Bakugou Katsuki was in love with the other.

He loved Todoroki too.

A small gasp from the red and white-haired made Midoriya want to kiss the boy right there and then. Secretly, Izuku liked the expressions that Bakugou was capable of coaxing from Todoroki. It was because Shouto never made any expressions, always staring at them with a deadpan look.

Averting his eyes from Todoroki because of the guilt, he looked at Kaminari who silently played with his phone. Sometimes Izuku couldn't help but wonder why the blond didn't get as irritated as he was with Katsuki.

He didn't get to ponder on it much when there was a sudden hiss from Bakugou, Midoriya turned to them again. He smiled and hid it behind his hand, he hoped that Katsuki didn't notice the small puff of a laugh escaping him.

Todoroki was glaring daggers at Bakugou while holding onto his ash-blond hair threatening to drag it out should Katsuki not let go of him. It was rare but some days Shouto had enough and actually attempted a resistance.

"Listen now, Shouto, let's not do something both of us will regret later" Bakugou talked slowly trying a careful approach. Bakugou was fully aware that Shouto wouldn't really hurt him, but because he was glad that Todoroki looked annoyed, so he played along. A small smile was present on his face but Izuku would never point it out, too afraid of being killed by the ash-blond.

Todoroki just continued to glare right into Bakugou's crimson eyes with his cheeks puffing up in anger. It was adorable, really, but none of them had the guts to get close to him when he got like that. They were afraid of ruining their chance of making Shouto let out some frustration. Instead, they silently watched until Bakugou finally gave up.

Shouto let go of the Katsuki's hair and made his way towards him.

For some reason, Izuku thought of when they were younger, when Todoroki still used to live in that place. Izuku remembered occasionally grabbing onto Shouto's hand to calm him down, other times he would do it so Shouto wouldn't get lost. Todoroki had a hard time following him.

Now, it has become a habit to hold onto his hand unconsciously each time he was close. He wasn't sure what the other felt about it, but not once has Shouto complained, Midoriya assumed it was okay. "Hey, don't fucking tell me you're going with fucking Deku!?"

Midoriya noticed Todoroki's mismatched eyes land on their tangled hands before he looked at Izuku as if the green-haired would understand what he meant. It was sad, Midoriya thought, the fact that he did understand everytime he looked into Shouto's eyes. It made him questions his obsession with the boy at times like these.

"I guess I'll stay over at his place tonight" Izuku mumbled quietly, raising his voice wasn't enjoyable.

Bakugou clicked his tongue in anger rustling a frustrated hand through his hair. He looked back at them one last time before grabbing Kaminari and dragging him away. Izuku knew that Katsuki was perspective so he was thankful when the ash-blond said his next words. "Fine, I get it already. . ." Katsuki hesitated only for a single moment then rushed to speak again "Just make sure you don't fucking leave him alone"

He shared a long look with Midoriya then promotely walked away with a complaining Kaminari who mumbled something about not getting a goodnight kiss. Izuku knew Katsuki enough to be able to understand him, all it took was a nod of his head and the other was gone.

Lost in thoughts he nearly forgot that he was still holding onto Todoroki's hand. It wasn't until the said boy starts swinging their intertwined hands up and down that he finally looked at Todoroki. Izuku smiled almost instantly when he saw Shouto play with their hands so leisurely, it was adorable. Everything Shouto did was adorable.

After a short moment, Izuku asked the other what was on his mind. "Are you still not able to sleep alone?" The question was easier to ask now, at least much easier to ask from the time when everything was still fresh.

Their swinging hands started to slow down and the look on Shouto's face turned distant, a reaction Izuku had gotten accustomed to.

Shouto's mismatched eyes refuse to stray from the ground and while no words were said Midoriya understands that it is Shouto's way of saying no.

Izuku doesn't want to face him so he started to walk, a way to escape the unwanted memories. Life didn't ever make it easy to forget all the abuse or the loss that one has experienced.

He wish he knew what he could do so that the burden Shouto carried would weigh just a little less. He was aware that Todoroki needed to accept everything that had happened, but Izuku was afraid that at this rate Shouto would probably never speak again.

It's when they get to his apartment that Izuku suddenly felt guilty for bringing Todoroki along, it wasn't the brightest of places to spend the night at. So much for deciding to live alone without even having a stable job yet.

He missed his mother, although she was a city away Izuku hadn't had the time to visit her. He made a mental note to visit her one of these days.

He opened a random conversation with Todoroki not expecting any answers, they just silently walked inside and Izuku kept looking back to see if Shouto was still following. An excuse for not holding hands anymore and Izuku knew he might've been a bit paranoid that Todoroki would disappear if he didn't look carefully. He dismissed the old memory of that one incident.

"So," he says nonchalantly to avoid the suffocating atmosphere." I was thinking, did you ever visit her grave?" When the words left his mouth Midoriya didn't think much about it, sometimes there are words said that aren't meant to be anything but a thought.

The silence that followed was something else, Izuku wondered if he was the only one who could feel the change in atmosphere. It took a minute for him to realize what he had asked.

Izuku didn't even turn around before he started to apologize immediately "oh, I really didn't mean to say that, it just kind of slipped and I didn't really think twice about it-"

Izuku somehow managed to stop his excessive mumbling to look up at Shouto. His eyes are wide and there are tears on the corner of them, but like every other time, Todoroki does not cry.

Instead, he just silently clenched his fists on his shirt and made his way to sit on Izuku's couch.

Midoriya was too afraid of say anything but the knowledge that this had happened before made him walk there and grab the other in a hug. He felt relief washing over him when Todoroki didn't push him away instead hugged him back.

"I'm sorry. I promise not ask again. I'm really sorry" Although he had been in this situation before Izuku still didn't know what to do other than apologising.

Todoroki shook his head and brought out his phone to type something on it, on the screen Izuku reads 'no, it's my fault. You have nothing to apologize for, it's my own fault for still not getting over it and causing all of you trouble, I'm sorry'

He hated it just like Bakugou. He hated It when Shouto apologized for something that wasn't his fault, he hated it especially when it was something about Shouto's life.

Not being able to get over the death of someone special was normal. Even if it been a few years, it would always leave an empty part but Shouto apologized for it as if it was something wrong.

"What do you say about visiting her together? We can bring flowers to the grave and maybe there are stuff you want to tell her?" On the inside Midoriya was terrified of stepping out of his boundaries, however he knew he need to be the one to give the first push forward.

Todoroki stiffened up at the suggestion, there was hesitation vivid in his eyes but he picked up his phone. 'But what if I meet up with them? I'm sure they both despise me now for doing that to their mother'

Shouto shook his head and types again. 'I'm scared I don't want to go.'

Midoriya sighed he knew who Todoroki was talking about, but that didn't change a thing. It was because letting him remain a prisoner of his past was worse than him not facing the people connected to his past.

"You're wrong they won't hate you" Izuku felt tired of repeating these words it felt like nothing would ever reach Shouto "They loved you and they still do. You did nothing wrong so stop blaming everything on yourself"

Todoroki looked at him in a way Izuku could only describe as sadness. Shouto put down his phone and instead used his notebook. He didn't write in it though, he just flipped through a few pages. He found the page where the lines he wanted to say were already written in scratched up lines 'She died because of ME"

Shouto's expression said to give up and for a second Izuku wanted to shout at him and tell him that he wasn't the cause.

Izuku wanted to grab him by the shoulders and tell him that she had chosen to protect him because she loved him. Her kids loved Shouto just as much.

None of this would get through that thick wall of self-hatred that Shouto had put up, so he just took in a deep breath to calm down.

"We are going tomorrow whether you like it or not and if you try to run I'm calling Bakugou and kaminari on you" Shouto looked at him like he was crazy, he quickly wrote in his notebook and pushed it in front of Izuku's face "You wouldn't dare. . ."

Izuku smiled at him sweetly but there was mischief hidden behind the sweetness. "apparently you don't know me that well"

After saying that Midoriya started counting in his head. One, two, three.

The exact moment Midoriya counted to three Todoroki made a beeline towards the door.

He was hoping to the get the hell out of there but Midoriya was just a bit faster. Izuku held the door shut with his foot enabling shouto to open it.

However, in the next second Shouto was running towards the window. Luckily for him the apartment was on the first floor. He wasn't fast enough because Midoriya lifted him off the ground before he so much as opened the window.

Todoroki struggled but it was useless because Midoriya attended karate daily while Bakugou went to kickboxing. Shouto never stood a chance against them. Nevertheless, Shouto seemed dead set on not giving up without a fight.

In the end with a kick to the groin and a few slaps on the face Midoriya managed to make the other give up. Perhaps the older also felt it was time to pay a visit. He didn't want Shouto to suffer, but if he had to make a choice from short term suffering and long time suffering then he wouldn't hesitate.

Todoroki would be hurt but only temporarily. A risk he was willing to take even if the other started to hate him.

Chapter Text

The graveyard isn't the best places to visit at night and certainly not the best to spend the day at. Its only purpose to act as a bad reminder for the people that are no longer with you, however, most people needed to pay a visit once in a while for their beloveds.

Todoroki Shouto was not an exception, he himself had lost a dear person. It was a long time ago and the memory still frightened him but not once had he visited herShe wasn’t related by blood and didn't owe him anything. She was dearer to him than any of his family members could ever wish to be. Perhaps it had been because of that, that she no longer existed in his world anymore.

His mother had sworn to him that everything he loved would be destroyed. ‘You’ll be the reason for others pain’ she had said. And Shouto could never disregard the thought that if he had listened, just maybe, maybe everything would have turned out different from what it did.

"Kazuha Maria died age 35 by being shot with a pistol right in her upper abdomen causing nearly instant death"

Midoriya lifted his eyes from the grave to look at the red and white-haired boy beside him who was silent. He wished he could get a reaction, but Todoroki didn't move, his eyes remaining on the grave in front of him. The quietness was always overbearing for Midoriya but it was normal with Todoroki.  Midoirya sighed a habit developed over the years.

"Come on Shouto, it's okay to cry. You can look sad. . .” Izuku didn’t want Shouto to hold himself back for feeling unworthy. “you don't have to hold everything in all the time, I’m here for you" Izuku didn’t say the rest of the sentence, always have been.

Shouto blinked a few times, a form of holding back his tears, his gaze fell back down on the grave. Midoriya has been friends with Todoroki for as long as he remembers, but even he only knew a few bits and pieces of what Shouto went through as a kid. Sometimes, it hurt when he thought about it, the worst part was being there the whole time but never aware of the things happening.

A text message got him out of his thoughts, he checked his phone to see Kaminari texting him about a request he made earlier. "hey Shouto” he called out to the boy who looked at him to let Izuku know he had his attention. “I have some work coming up, but don't worry Kaminari is right around the corner he'll come to pick you up"

Todoroki just nodded, he fiddled a bit with the shirt he borrowed from Midoriya and somehow it looked bigger on Shouto. Maybe it was because Midoriya was buffer in size albeit he was shorter by a few inches. 

Midoriya was always shorter than Todoroki throughout the years they had been friends, now, Shouto was barely a cm or so. Izuku smiled at the thought. 

 

Shouto decided to sit beside the grave when Izuku leaves, his hand rested on the gravestone gently brushing the dust away. His lips part and just when he had made the decision to speak he heard a few voices in the distance so he didn't. His eyes catch Kaminari’s figure getting closer to greet Todoroki with his charming smile that lacked the usual playfulness.

"Hey, how's it going?" Kaminari asked when he was close enough, his voice sounded pleasant in the silence that consumed Shouto.

Todoroki smiled in return, it's fake and they both know it. His smile disappeared and was exchanged with fear when he heard familiar voices behind him. His shoulders stiffened, he begged his own body to move and get out of there before they notice him. Instead, he just sat there with his back facing them not daring to move a muscle.

"T-Todoroki!” the voice was so nostalgic that it almost made him cry. “is that really you?" He felt his heart beating faster with the question as fear kept building inside him. He wanted to throw up at the feeling of guilt and regret. His whole body was trembling and even though he hadn’t looked at them, he was afraid of their expressions. Was it disgust? hatred? or perhaps indifference?

They probably hated him, they most likely wanted him dead or maybe just wanted him to suffer for the rest of his life. Unconsciously, he was sweating, the trembling becoming something unstable. 

"Hey, Todoroki! are you okay man?" Kaminari called out but his voice was blocked out by the buzzing sound in his ears and it wasn't until someone grabbed to pull him close to their chest that he regained his senses.

A familiar scent relaxed his body, it reminded him of those hugs he used to get from Maria whenever he couldn't calm down. A moment or two passes and Shouto loses track of time he just wanted this moment to last. But the person untangled their hands from him and the voice that followed threatened him to fall back into his previous state.

"Todoroki have you calmed down a bit?" The voice sounded exactly like her Maria before she was shot to death- no don't think like that.

He lifted his eyes up to come into contact with warm brown eyes. He wasn’t good at reading feelings, but he thought the look she gave him reminded him of the one he got when he still believed he was loved. Either way, the fear he had suddenly dissolved to be replaced with an emotion he didn’t know the name of.

It was Kaminari who spoke up for Shouto when he realized that he wasn't going to answer "I'm sorry Kazuha-san but Shouto here doesn't speak very much” Kaminari stopped himself from finding an excuse “to be honest he doesn't speak at all anymore"

The young woman had brown hair complimenting her eyes. She stared at Kaminari with a worried expression but soon directed it towards Shouto who was busy avoiding eye contact with her brother. The woman gently traced her fingers on the scar Shouto had on his face, her eyes filled with tears. "Todoroki. . .that's Isamu, you and he used to play together as kids"

She turned her head towards her brother who also shared the same chocolate brown hair and hazel eyes, it was clear that they were both twins. Todoroki stiffened again but this time refused to show weakness when the guy glared at him with anger barely hidden.

Shouto wanted to give up his stubborn act of being tough and that he expected this, in reality, it terrified him that Isamu might hate him.

"You little prick where the hell have you been all this time huh!?" Isamu's words hit him hard, even if he expected this Todoroki wasn't ready to face it. Shouto closed his eyes to lessen any wrath the brunette might throw at him.

He was surprised when Isamu lifted him off the ground to give him a bear crushing hug, the brunette sounds like he was sobbing "you idiot! Do you have any idea how worried we were? Why would you do that to us? We missed you so much, idiot!” The boy sniffled loudly against his ear “I'm so glad to see you're alright"

Todoroki was too surprised to say anything, so he just stood there giving the guy a few pats on the back. When Isamu let go he still had a few tears in his eyes that he wiped away with his sleeve. His sister came over and patted him on the shoulder to comfort her brother, she had a smile on.

It took another moment for Shouto to process everything until he quickly brought out his notebook and started scribbling down on it. 'I am really sorry Isamu, you too Inari I didn't- I was just- I'm sorry. I ruined everything' He drew a line over the sentences that he wasn't satisfied with and went with his last words. Apologizing. 

He tugged a bit at his hair unable to form a single sentence that pleased him, all the important things never said silently crushing him without anyone knowing. Inari gave him a glare that didn’t suit her soft brown eyes, she shook her head and she looked like she wanted to shout at Todoroki, but she decided against it.

"Just- Just don't, you don't understand anything. For how long are you going to keep blaming yourself for all that happened?” She took in a deep breath to calm down then continued.

“Our mother loved you and so do we, she chose to protect you because she wanted you to live longer. She wanted you to be free and not bound by that terrible place.” She looked Todoroki right in the eyes “Why? why are you like this? You don't even speak anymore. We searched for you for so long. The worst part was that not even once did you bother telling us that you were doing fine or if you were still living.”

Inari let out her remaining breath her feelings finally calming down a bit after saying everything on her mind “Just how do you think that makes us feel? You can't just throw away our bond like that after everything we went through together"

Her last sentence was said a little louder than the previous. Right now, it is all she could do to make Shouto open his eyes. Fortunately, Todoroki did get the message.

He felt embarrassed for trying to make excuses for running away from what he didn't want to face. His hand clenched around the pencil, Todoroki felt the need to apologize. At this point, it would most likely just lead to an endless struggle, a struggle to accept that just sometimes it's okay to not be at fault.

Inari's eyebrows curled into worry when she saw his expression, she didn’t know what to do as she wasn't her mother. Her mother was always able to say the right things at the right moment. She had repeatedly imagined what she would say and do when she mett Todoroki again but now that she was faced with him, she didn't know what to do.

She held his arms, his expression hadn’t changed, it was the same as when they first met. When he wouldn’t smile no matter what. She had wished that after all these years he would finally be able to smile and although he hadn’t been around she wanted him to be living his life happily without any worries.

She felt terrible knowing that he was in a state like this, grateful however that Midoriya found them a while back and kept them in touch about his wellbeing. Inari had wanted to meet him instantly but the Midoriya refused it by stating that he probably wasn't ready to meet them just yet.

Even though Midoriya finally let them meet he had warned them that Shouto wouldn't reply. It was sad, they both knew what a beautiful voice Shouto had. "Todoroki. . . please stop blaming yourself” she wasn't really sure what more to say so she concluded it with her next words “just know that you have a home with us and we're always going to be your family even if we aren't connected by blood. Come home when you feel like it."

She let go of his arms and ushered her brother away leaving behind Todoroki and a reluctant Kaminari. "Hey. . . want to go grab a bite? I betcha' hungry huh" The blond smiled playfully at the other. He dragged Todoroki along without waiting for an answer while mumbling something about this absolutely delicious restaurant around. 

There was something about Kaminari being there that made Todoroki feel a little bit better. He smiled letting a cheesy comment from the blond get to him. Only this once he would allow it.

Friends weren't so bad to have. 

 

Chapter Text

"So, you know I may have used a taser to shut Kirishima up." Kaminari said through a mouthful of ramen "You should have seen the look he made! It was like one of the most hilarious things ever!"

Kaminari laughed out loud by thinking about the accident where he used his new taser on his red-haired friend. "the funny thing was that Kirishima never fainted from it! Almost like he is made of stone." Denki lifted his chopsticks to eat the noodles that were left, he had suggested they go to a more elegant restaurant but Shouto refused, saying he was okay with something simple.

Kaminari wouldn't deny Shouto anything, in the first place he was only around to make the other happy. As long as Shouto was happy then it was all Kaminari needed to go on living even if the said boy didn't return his feelings. He hadn't confessed yet, though. 

He directed his eyes towards Shouto the slurping sounds when he ate the noodles accompanying him. It had been a long day and Kaminari was hungry, he supposed Shouto was too.  However, the boy only played with his food twirling his chopsticks and occasionally giving a small bite to the food in front of him. Sometimes, he gave a small smile at the things Kaminari said indicating that he was listening.

Kaminari hadn't known Todoroki for as long as Bakugou or Midoriya had, both were there when Shouto's life was at its worst. On the other hand, he was the only one who had heard Todoroki's last words before he completely shut off the world.

Kaminari narrowed his eyes at the memory, it felt like yesterday. It still brought shivers down his spine as fear overtook his senses just thinking about it.

'please. . .I'm begging you, kill me'

The words haunted the blond ever since. He couldn't shake away the feeling that formed in his gut every time he thought of it. Of course, Kaminari didn't dare tell anyone about what Todoroki asked him to do, especially not Bakugou or Midoriya. He knew that those two were no good.

Then again, Todoroki had given him a look that said to be quiet about it. Back then, he looked so sad and desperate that Kaminari was afraid of doing anything that might've triggered the boy to take suicide. What really saddened Kaminari was the way he had been asked of doing something so cruel, as if he was capable of doing it and that burned him.

Shouto probably knew that Kaminari wasn't going to do it. Maybe it was why he later had a knife at his throat and Kaminari begging him to put it down. The blond thought a lot about the tears that Todoroki shed that night.  About how after that Shouto had never cried again. It terrified Denki that Shouto was capable of ending his life in a matter of seconds and Kaminari wouldn't be able to do anything about it.

Shouto walked in to his apartment panting heavily from a long run, sweat trickled down his face and it looked like he had just been on a marathon. Kaminari was on the phone speaking to Bakugou about a case of drug dealers hanging around the area. Todoroki grabbed onto his shirt and pushed him forward so fast that the blond stumbled a little muttering a few curses.

It wasn't until Kaminari noticed the tears that fell from the boy's face that his hands fell limb against his side, Bakugou was shouting something but Kaminari was too focused on Shouto. "T-Todoroki, w-what happened" His words came out in clusters as he wasn't familiar with an unstable Shouto like this.

Todoroki just clenched his fist harder into Kaminari's shirt crumbling it, he opened his mouth to start speaking but nothing came out except the sound of broken words that sounded more like tiny screams. "Denki! - help- I can't anymore" was all the blond could make out from the sobbing and the tears that had fallen from Todoroki's eyes.

"w-wait Todoroki calm- calm down first and tell me what happened?" The sobbing boy put his head onto Kaminari's chest as his legs gave in, Kaminari held him up. Todoroki just kept crying like a little kid unable to control his emotions any longer and after a while, Shouto spoke again.

"please. . .I'm begging you, kill me"

That was all it took for the blond to suddenly freak out "what the hell are you saying Todoroki?! of course I can never do that!!" It was probably at this time that Bakugou had realized something was really wrong because of Kaminari's shouts at the other end of the phone.

Todoroki suddenly stopped crying as much but the tears kept falling with the refusal of ending, he stood up and walked into the bathroom shutting it closed. Kaminari freaked out at the possible things Todoroki could do in there, he banged the door multiply times asking Todoroki to open the door, but the boy wouldn't make a sound.

At this point, Kaminari Remembered Bakugou on the phone so he quickly brought the phone to his ear "Bakugou I need your help, something is really wrong with Todoroki, he's locked himself in the bathroom and won't open it!"

He heard heavy breathing from the other side of the phone as Bakugou started talking "bust the fucking door open, blow it up or whatever just open the damn shit, I'm on my way there now."

Kaminari did as he was told trying to kick the door open, a useless attempt until Bakugou rushed inside slamming the bathroom door open. Midoriya was right behind him looking just as busted as Bakugou from all the running and Kaminari was sure that the ash-blond had told Midoriya. When the three of them finally opened the door, they found Todoroki holding a knife right under his throat.

They all wanted to jump right in front of him and throw it away but they knew they couldn't add pressure to the boy in front of them who could slit his throat at any second.

"Shouto don't be stupid, put the fucking knife down!" Bakugou shouted at the other who continued to let the tears fall.

Midoriya started saying some stuff about how this won't just affect him but also everyone else who holds him dearly, but Todoroki shook his head in refusal.
Bakugou had looked truly terrified for once when Shouto gave that one look that said almost everything he hadn't before. 'I want it to end'

Just when Todoroki lifted the knife all three of them moved instantaneously, Bakugou had thrown the knife far out of reach. Midoriya had grabbed onto Todoroki to make sure he didn't slip on the ground while Kaminari had pulled his hands away afraid that Todoroki would injure himself with them.

It happened so fast that even Shouto stood still for a long minute contemplating what had just happened, after a while, he had let himself fall to the ground tired. Midoriya went down with him then started hugging him from behind while the tears came. Kaminari was unable to hide the tiny tears forming in his eyes, he too hugged Todoroki from the left letting Bakugou pull them all close into a bigger hug.

"Don't ever do this Shouto, you can't leave us like that"

"We love you, so don't ever throw away your life thinking it's for the best"

"promise you won't ever try something like this again!"

Todoroki had let the tears fall down his face not able to answer to anything. 

"I'm sorry"

Todoroki Shouto never spoke again nor did he ever cry after that.

Kaminari felt just a little sick remembering what happened, he wondered why Shouto did what he did. Nobody had ever dared to ask. Maybe they were afraid of what Shouto would say or maybe it was the fear that he might just close them off even more. All Kaminari knew was that after what happened he promised he would only make Todoroki smile. 

Chapter Text

 

Shouto didn’t feel sleepy even as he laid on the mattress in his room. His body was exhausted but his eyes were wide open.

It was late autumn and the cold crept into the room. The only comfort was hiding inside his blankets away from the scary world.

Todoroki sighed, the cold served as nothing compared to the heat radiating from his body, sweat trickled down his face. He had long forsaken the blankets that were shattered everywhere but on him.

His mismatched eyes traveled the room, it was dark and the flickering lights outside from the cars driving by made it more terrifying. He closed his eyes tightly wishing to block out the light but the sounds caused him a disturbance that had his mind wander in wrong places.

 

"Shouto your existence is a nuisance, you destroy everything for everyone"

The tired expression his sister gave him every day made him wonder where he went wrong

"Why don't you kill yourself?" "I'll help you do it, I'll make it painful. . . you like that stuff right? why else would you allow dad to hit you?"

Two pair of eyes laughing at him hauntingly. What had he ever done to them?

"Why don't you ever learn to listen?"

Big hands reach out to him, no, they were destroying him, at least, what was left of him.  

"You did this!"

Grey eyes stared at him with insanity in them. A twisted smile on her features. 

 

Shouto jolted awake, his breathing was heavy, and his heart was beating too fast. He didn’t know when he fell asleep. It might have been in between his thoughts. 

His phone was beside the pillow. Todoroki opened the device and the light was too bright for his blurry vision. Lowering the brightness he found himself searching through his contacts, without checking he pressed call, he didn’t have many contacts anyway. 


"Hello?"

A gruff voice answered from the other side Todoroki unconsciously relaxed when he recognized the receiver as Bakugou.

Todoroki could faintly hear Bakugou grumble from the other side when he didn’t answer. "Shouto . . . Is that you?

Shouto nodded forgetting that Bakugou couldn’t see him through the call. He quickly put the phone on face time, as he waited for Bakugou to answer he stood up to put the lights on. The dark was getting uncomfortable.

Katuski's face appeared on the screen his signature frown present. Todoroki felt bad for waking him up. The blond had bags under his eyes. Katsuki usually went to work early in the mornings.

The ash-blond rubbed his eyes still half asleep, he didn't seem sure if it was really Shouto who called him. Todoroki hesitatingly waved at the agent. He was surprised that Bakugou didn’t lash out at him for waking him up. 

"what's wrong?" He definitely didn’t expect the worry that Bakugou expressed. Shouto knew Katsuki was a good guy, his attitude was just a bit difficult to understand.

Todoroki grabbed his notebook and pencil to write down on it. 'nothing wrong.'


Bakugou made the decision sit up straight, he sighed pushing his fringe backward out of his eyes. Even though the phone Shouto could see Katsuki’s biceps flexing when he lifted his arm. The tight skin glowing in all its glory down to his abs. Honestly, Todoroki hated that he was blushing, why did Bakugou have to sleep without a shirt? "why did you call in the middle of the night then?

Todorki didn’t want to admit that the husk in Katsuki’s voice was sexy. Bakugou was really handsome with his boyish looks especially after waking up, not all people were blessed like that. It was a blessing just seeing the ash-blond not angry or cursing like he always did. 

Todoroki quickly shook his head, he hoped the blush wasn’t so visible through the screen.

"No reason? Really?" Bakugou seemed unconvinced when he saw Shouto fidget behind the screen. He raised an eyebrow to seem a little intimidating although the fatigue was doing its work on him. 

Todoroki averted his eyes from the camera back to the window as the shadow of a tree flickered. He felt a little scared but Bakugou calling his name made him feel secure. The ash-blond had that effect on him whenever he had a bad day.

"Shouto. . .you feelin’ okay? I'll come over-" he stopped when Shouto shook his head instantly writing in the notebook again. 

Apart from the occasional cars driving by and the scribbling of the pen against paper, there was no noise, only the two of them. A short moment passed and Shouto lifted his notebook to the camera while trying not to shake so Bakugou could read it. This was Todoroki’s way of talking with people and Katsuki couldn’t help but feel a little special to be the one with him.

'I'm sorry for waking you up, you don't need to come, but if it's okay with you, can we just talk for a while? Just a little, I promise to leave after that'

Todoroki rubbed his hair sheepishly it wasn't something he usually asked of others, especially Bakugou Katuski. He waited patiently for a response, he expects the ash blond to refuse immediately.

 

 

"That's alright with me, but were you having a nightmare again? Didn't one of those idiots sleep over?"

Todoroki shook his head again, Bakugou was unable to tell which question he had denied. Katsuki didn’t want to push it so he started talking about stuff from work to change the topic.

Bakugou had always had an interest in explosions and although he could make bombs easily he liked his job of disarming the explosive stuff more. Of course, most of the time his job was all about risking his life to save others. 

It was scary knowing you could die any moment or be the cause of a massive explosion. Then again, he liked the rush and the adrenaline pumping up in his blood with all his senses springing to life. It is one of the few moments in this life where he truly felt like he was actually living.  

The job paid well, and he didn’t do it all the time, currently, he had only done 2 successful cases. Mostly he helped Kaminari and Kirishima with their jobs at the police station, he had the skills to work in that line of business too, it was mostly to keep himself busy. Plus, extra cash never hurt.

Katuski was aware that most of the conversations he had with Todoroki were always him talking while the scarred boy occasionally nodded as a 'continue' or 'I understand'. Very few times Todoroki shared a half-hearted smile that could be defined as a laugh in Todoroki's world.

Bakugou still found it adorable though, when the boy looked at him enthusiastically as if what he said was the most important thing in the world that made him extremely happy.

Before any of them noticed it, the time had flown by in an instant, a few minutes turning into hours. Not long after Bakugou saw Todoroki yawn, the boy barely getting any sleep lately. Katsuki stopped talking for a second then told him to go to sleep but Todoroki protested saying he wanted to hear the rest.

Bakugou felt annoyed that the two of them were losing sleep, he didn’t really care because he had no work tomorrow, but sleep was a necessity. "listen, why don't we hang out today? I’ll pick you up in the afternoon." he hesitated just a bit "you can invite that chick from last time, I kinda need to apologize an’ all anyway

Bakugou’s face felt hot he wasn’t the type to be honest. But the sparkles in Todoroki's eyes made his honesty worth it. "Oh, me and Kaminari are working on this case of drug dealers in the area, they’re raping people be it girls or guys, be careful okay? And call me if anything happens"

Todoroki nodded his head, he was a little disturbed by the news, people do some crazy stuff in this world, but he was he’s the reason for the destruction of his family. So, who was he to talk?

Katsuki would have said that he was wrong and that it was never his fault. Todoroki was sure of it, that's why he never said anything. 

 

xxxxxxxxxx

 

"Todoroki?" Her voice brought the two of them to a stop in their conversation, he lifted his gaze to the black-haired girl who looked like she’d been running. "I'm sorry I got here so late!" She took in a deep breath bowing her head in an apology. 

Todoroki shook his hands to tell her it was all right, he wanted to add that 'you shouldn't have run' but he refused to talk. Katuski was sitting on a chair beside him at the small café they were at, he ordered the drinks for them. "Just sit, women" Bakugou growled at her, he did it to everyone. 

Yaoyorozu was surprised to see Katsuki, his hands in his pockets and wearing a black parka jacket that Momo found went well with his dark jeans and wool beanie. He was wearing a pair of boots fitting his outfit perfectly and Yaoyorozu thought he looked good but of course, she wouldn’t admit to that. 

She made a mental note that while it was really cold, Bakugou seemed especially sensitive to it. On the other hand Todoroki was wearing a pair of Frye Rogan’s boots over ripped sky-blue jeans and a leather jacket with a hoodie underneath it. Yaoyorozu assumed Bakugou forced him to wear the hoodie. Todoroki wasn’t usually affected by the cold. At least from what she could make from their time together. 

She felt extremely grateful to Katsuki for having Todoroki look so handsome and cute at the same time, she wasn't going to say that though. She took Katsuki's indirect offer to sit across them on the chair that was empty beside Todoroki. 

"hey, 'bout last time- " Bakugou started, he was repeating what he had practiced before coming. Yaoyorozu shook her head instantly lifting a hand to stop him so he couldn’t continue.

"If you are trying to apologize please don't, I understand your actions and I'm glad to see he has someone so . . . " She hesitated to find the right words "protective of him" she finished, satisfied that it sounded proper enough. 

The agent started to blush at her words, his gaze fell downwards so that none of them could see him embarrassed, maybe she wasn't so bad. "Ya sure, just wanted to let you know I'm sorry" he mumbled quietly looking away from the two watching him. 

Yaoyorozu just smiled at him "apology accepted and I'm sorry for punching you" 

He nodded lazily and a smirk decided to show on his face "No problem, I bet you hurt more than did by that punch anyways” he couldn’t stop himself as the words it slipped out of his mouth “have you ever been taught manners before?" his voice had a hint of provocation in it that riled Yaoyorozu up. 

She wasn’t childish, it was what she liked to believe, but when someone purposely tried to provoke her. Well, she took no responsibility. "Yes well, Bakugou-kun last time I checked I wasn't the one slamming a defenseless person to the wall in a bar" her voice is low and filled with mock, the ash-blond glared at her furiously. 

The two shared an intimidating stare off, waiting for the other to back down but both were too stubborn to lose their pride. A low growl came from Katsuki who he removed his gaze from her angrily "Whoever said girls are weak, they’re wrong. You’re more like a gorilla" 

A kick under the table caused him to wince and lift his leg to massage the place, he cursed under his breath. He glared at Yaoyorozu who was happily chatting away with Todoroki, the boy writing comments in between on his notebook or just nodded along. 

Katsuki was pissed, he wanted to shout at her, instead he bit his tongue to calm down because Todoroki was smiling. Eventually, he joined the conversation, there were times he and Yaoyorozu threw competitive words at each other. But Katsuki argued that It was a part of getting to know each other better. He despised her kicks though. 

"Listen, women, I've had it with you and your kicks! I'll drag you to hell if you do that one more time" Bakugou shouted at her, he was getting annoyed, from the pain on his left ankle he was sure it was going to form a bruise. 

She smiled at him mischievously. "oh, are you saying that you will join me?" Her smirk widened when Bakugou’s anger flared. 

"Fuck you, I never said that!" he shouted again, he felt the frustration building up at her sassy attitude.

"but you said-" she stopped instantly when she heard a low puff of laughter that escaped Shouto who had been silently sitting beside them. 

The two of them watched in surprise as Todoroki held a hand over his mouth to hold in his laughter. Their eyes widened when they finally realized the meaning behind it. Shouto removed his hand and made a few gestures indicating he was going to the bathroom, they nodded still in disbelief at what happened. 

When he was gone the two of them shared a look with each other still in a semi-state of shock until Yaoyorozu spoke up. "Did he just. . .  laugh?" She wasn't sure if that could've been identified as a laugh since it was just a puff of air.

Bakugou hoped to find some confirmation from her face but instead, he had to give it to himself. "Ya. . . I guess he did. . ." They both didn’t seem too convinced but the fact that Todoroki immediately went away indicated that something did happen. 

Yaoyorozu sighed slightly relaxing her posture after a while, she watched Bakugou who was rubbing his temple in stress, or disbelief? She wasn’t too familiar with him, so she wasn’t sure.

"Hey. . . Why did Todoroki stop talking?" She asked the question that has been bugging her for a while, but she never had the guts to ask. Bakugou was quiet for a moment, he just looked at her then opened his mouth to speak. His eyes weren’t on her anymore.  

"I, I honestly don't know" he let out a breath before reminiscing the things that happened that day. "One day he just barged into Pikachu's room and started crying his eyes out"

Yaoyorozu assumed that 'Pikachu' was him referring to Kaminari, he was the only one who matches with the nickname. Bakugou continued "I was on the phone with him at that time, so I only heard Kaminari panicking saying stuff I didn't understand and then suddenly he shouted something about ‘not being able to do that’. At that moment I was worried, so rushed there, after a while, I heard Pikachu saying that Shouto had locked himself in the bathroom and wouldn't open the door. I was so damn scared I almost got hit by a car on my way. When I finally got there I called Midoriya and the three of us busted the door open"

He remembered the things that happened after that and he felt the fear he had when he didn’t know if he'll be able to save him or not. "He- he had a knife at his throat! I mean for what reason would he do that. I wish. . .I wish I could have been there for him so that he wouldn't have been pushed to go that far" 

Yaoyorozu felt terrible, she didn’t have any idea and only now did it drain on her just how far she was from the person she liked. It was a feeling that made sure to tell her how useless she really was. She didn’t know what to do so she patted Bakugou's shoulder ignoring the tightness in her throat. 

"Fuck this" Katsuki hated that he got emotional even after so long but it was a pain that haunted him every time he closed his eyes. "That guy, I've known him ever since we were ten years old, not before Deku but I still knew him when he was living in that household." 

Momo was confused she wondered why Bakugou brought up Todoroki's family? Unless it had something to do with the incident. "What about Todoroki's house?"

Bakugou gave her a side glance contemplating if he should tell her or not, he thought about how Shouto had laughed because of her. "Todoroki was getting abused up until he was 13. . ." Yaoyorozu's eyes widen but she remained silent for him to continue. 

"His dad was a piece of shit and abused him to take out his stress. His mother, I heard had tried to protect him for a while, but the damn crazy bitch threw boiling water at him when it got too much for her. I mean what the fuck? What should Shouto be doing if his own mother couldn't keep it together."  Bakugou sighed trying to calm his nerves after getting angry thinking about it again.

"I'm not sure, but from what Deku said I heard his dad's in jail now and his mother is receiving medical attention. She was supposed to go to jail after killing someone but her older kids claimed that she had just gone insane because of Shouto's rebellious attitude and their father's abuse. The shits blamed everything on him and it took a while but eventually, they won the fight in their mom’s favor. Shouto did run away once to live with a teacher that had offered him help and for a short while, he was happy." 

Bakugou smiled thinking about a young Shouto who was playing around freely without any worries. Then a frown made its way on his features and the realization that Todoroki Shouto was never happy hit him. " That was until his mother found him. She shot the teacher dead who protected Shouto when his own mother aimed the pistol at him. For god sake, these people are crazy, he was going through all that crap and I was there, yet, I knew nothing until it was put out in the news." 

He grabbed his jacket in anger never knowing what could have been different if he had just realized it before it was too late. Yaoyorozu became uncomfortably silent which didn't seem very appealing to Bakugou, he told her everything he knew but he still he didn't appreciate the tense atmosphere it caused. 

Todoroki came waltzing in sitting on his chair with a small smile on his face before he noticed the tense mood. He wrote down asking what was wrong but Bakugou just mumbled a 'nothing'. Todoroki knew not to pry so he shrugged and started digging into the food that they ordered. 

Bakugou whispered into the Yaoyorozu’s ear so that Shouto didn’t hear them. "hey, you should at least pretend for him, he doesn’t want you to be sad" 

Yaoyorozu lifted her head then put on a charming smile she decided to leave the past where it belonged. Todoroki smiled when he saw that they were both back to normal. They joked around about Bakugou’s weird nicknames like Pikachu and Deku and constantly made fun of the ash blond. Yaoyorozu had a nice time until it was time to go home, no one really wanted to. 

Bakugou was in the same direction as Yaoyorozu while Todoroki was the opposite, Katsuki didn't want to leave Shouto but he insisted he would be fine and that he’d sleep over at Kaminari's place today. 

Somehow Katsuki felt like it was a bad idea. 

 

xxxxxxxx

 

Bakugou and Yaoyorozu walked back in comfortable silence, both too exhausted to say anything.

"hey, Bakugou-kun, I guess you weren't as bad as I thought you'd be" Yaoyorozu started, she felt it was okay to say that much. The cold made her breath form like smoke. 

The ash-blond grunted, he smiled just a bit "Guess you were. . . manageable" he said, the word earned him both a small punch on the shoulder and a slight laugh. 

Yaoyorozu sighed thinking about what she had heard from Katsuki, it was just so much to take in. From now on she had to be there for Todoroki and hope that he wouldn’t try taking suicide again. She knew very well how strong he was to continue living after everything that happened to him. She couldn't help but wonder what she would have done had she been in his place. She tried not to think about it anymore.  

There’s a sudden rock song playing that made her jump in shock. Bakugou apologized profusely then got out his phone with a red face as his ring tone was embarrassing, it was probably the work of Kaminari. He made a mental note to kill Pikachu later for it.

"Hey Bakugou, is Todoroki with you?" Speak of the devil and he shall appear. Yaoyorzu recognized the voice belonging to Kaminari. Bakugou grunted in annoyance "No, dipshit, he was supposed to come to your house today. Also, what the fuck is up with this ringtone?" 

Kaminari took in a deep breath before talking in a shaky voice "Ye I know. . .but my house wasn't that far from the place you guy were at. . ." He ignored the comment about the ringtone.

The ash-blond kicked a stone in the road then raised an eyebrow "So, what about it?" 

"Bakugou it's been over 10 minutes since the time he should have originally arrived, but he still isn't here!" Kaminari didn’t mean to be paranoid but something about this just didn’t feel right.

The ash-blond felt his throat suddenly clog up and the realization dawned on him as to what Kaminari was implying. "oh" Is all he could muster up and Yaoyorozu took the phone out of his hand "Kaminari this is me Yaoyorozu from last time".

The blond on the phone mumbled a hi. "have you tried checking outside for him, maybe he is close by, surely it can’t be that he might have gotten. . ." She couldn't complete her sentence, she knew that Todoroki was handsome and with the recent incidents happening around the area, he might as well be easy prey for them.

Kaminari sighed shakily before answering "I already did check everywhere, and I just can't find him, also you're wrong this is Todoroki Shouto. His luck is that bad to become one out of a million others" 

She felt like someone just punched her in the stomach as reality was clear for them all to see.

"fuck . . ."

 

Chapter Text

His eyes jerk open to the sound coming from his left side, it sends a vibration through the ground he is laying on. He moves his eyes to take in all his surroundings but the only thing he sees is the dark that engulfs him in a fear that he can’t escape from. 

There are a few voices he can make out from the outside of wherever he is, it terrifies him that they might come inside. Maybe the room he is staying in is the safest place.

It only takes him so much time to feel the heaviness of his own body and the heat making him dizzy in the process, it's warm, too warm. He tries to lift his hand, so he can wipe away the sweat trickling down his face only to realize that they are bound by a rope up to his elbows.

The rope burns into his skin each time he tries to move, he hisses in pain when he tries a second time to shift with a little more effort than the first time.

It hurt terribly, like skin being ripped apart. He bits his lip to ignore the pain on his arms while at the same time he tries to adjust to the dark. It’s a failed strive but at least now he can make out the boxes that surround him or he assumes that's what they are.

Luckily, his legs aren’t tied together, his hands aren’t tied behind his back, he figures it’s because he can’t escape from this place either way.

Accompanied by a little effort he manages to sit, leaning his back on the wall. It’s hard without light but he carefully reaches out to find his way through the boxes until he comes to a stop.

He's breathing is heavy with exhaustion. He closes his eyes, so he doesn’t strain them too much in the dark, he isn’t going to be seeing any light anytime soon. Todoroki thinks back to what happened before he was abducted, at first, he was hanging out with Bakugou and Yaoyorozu. He remembers them bickering with each other every few seconds, it made him feel a little happy, he isn't very used to that feeling. Shouto also doesn't understand why he had laughed when they were fighting each other, usually, you’d get mad when something like that happened, no?

However, Shouto wasn’t angry at them, in fact, them being playful with each other made him a little envious, why couldn't he have what they have? More than that he was grateful that none of them went through what he did.

Todoroki's happy when he sees his friends happy, it's all he can ask for. If nothing is right for him then all he can do is make it better for them, in that sense he feels his own joy in life.

They had to part and Todoroki was supposed to stay at Kaminari's place because he was afraid of staying alone. What if, one of the ghosts from his past appeared again? They had done once before. Why not again?

Of course, Shouto stayed at home some days otherwise, he liked to stay at his friend’s house because they were kind and he could trust them. Then again, there are things he hasn't told any of them but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t trust them. He just has a hard time adapting to everything new in his life, even if it’s been years.

He also thinks about the suggestion Midoriya once brought up about going to university, with all that’s happened he stopped going to school and instead got an education at home. Izuku thought it was better for him to get out of his shell and start seeing the world so Uni would be the first step, but Todoroki refused.  ‘He needed more time’ was what he said, he regrets his decision.

Although his friends always took him outside be it forcibly or not he was grateful for all the effort they put in him especially with how stubborn he is.

It still terrified him to go outside, afraid he might meet his family or someone else he doesn't want to face. Midoriya quoting "It's not your fault" every day has been helping him a little. 

Then there is Kaminari's who constantly takes him to places the blond knows he will like. Kaminari's smile is contagious, he smiles and so does Todoroki.

Bakugou is always surprising him with different things, the unnoticeable gestures the ash-blond thinks he does are very clear for him. Bakugou has a habit of daily texting him, calling to ask if he is eating properly or if there is anything he needs.

Todoroki smiles to himself, they were good people, they just all had one trait in common- they loved him. Don't get him wrong he was aloof but not dense, he could also see it. Be it Bakugou's angry kisses or Midoriya's touches to Kaminari's flirty words, they all held deep words that each of them probably wanted to convey.

There was also one more person he has developed special feelings for, the one girl who always seemed capable of opening his world and make him see more than he had ever wished for.

Yaoyorozu hadn’t been with him for so very long but she always texted him and called to have hour-long talks with him. She has so much knowledge about the world and she’s curious to learn even more. It makes him more open to stuff and he finds her very adorable when her eyes gleam with glee at the things she loves. 

He is happy to know her and wants to cherish her obvious feelings for him. He wants to have more talks with her and hopefully a long conversation where he will be able to talk to her using his own voice.

The way things are now, though, have him feeling regretful because there are just too many things he hasn’t said. He wishes he could remember what happened after he started walking to Kaminari's house.

A pair of hands grabbed his mouth from behind him and they had been holding a drugged cloth forcing Todoroki to inhale the toxic air. He had tried to struggle free but the drug had made him instantly lose consciousness. 

Once again, he is reminded of the terrible situation he’s in, there’s something questioning about the whole ordeal with the drunk sounding people outside of these walls. It takes just a moment for him to finally connect the dots and he feels the previous horror circulating again.

Bakugou had warned him about the drug dealers around the area.

This was something else, this was not abuse or kidnapping, he can deal with those because he was used to it happening but not this.

He opens his eyes immediately when he hears a door open, the first thing he sees is a man smiling at him so maliciously that Todoroki feels like throwing up. The door opens slowly and Shouto notices how worn out it is because it creaks when it moves. Todoroki's eyes are too focused on the sight of three men laughing drunkenly, the men approach him idly.

"Well, well look at this, our sleepy doll has woken up" The one who had smiled earlier speaks, he crouches down in front of Todoroki who finds the wall more comfortable to look at. The man's voice is grouchy with mock in his tone but Shouto tries to focus on the light hurting his eyes, he can't help cringe at the voice though.

"Now then doll, we'll just play with you a little. All you have to do is not struggle and trust me you'll find pleasure in this as well, we got an agreement?" He laughs at his sarcasm then looks at his comrades who share equal laughs

"Well you'll struggle either way they all do but that's the pleasure, watching you cry and scream for help"

Shouto trembles just a bit when the man forcibly makes him turn towards him, his touch is disgusting nothing like the giddy warm touches from Midoriya. Todoroki thinks his plan of enduring this is impossible.

The man hisses at Shouto his olive hair bouncing back when Shouto doesn’t speak.
"Has fear caught your tongue? Don't you know how to speak?" the man says shifting Shouto’s face to get a good look at him then smiles again. "It doesn't matter you'll be screaming soon enough while we watch your pretty face in pain."

The two behind him snicker when a gasp leaves Shouto's mouth, it happens unintentionally when the man slips his hands inside Shouto’s clothes. Todoroki wants to cry, he wants to kick the man, to scream but most of all he wants to ask for help, he doesn’t though, it would only pleasure these guys and he doubts anyone would find him here anyway.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"Have you found him yet?"

Kaminari shakes his head, he feels defeated. Bakugou has been raging for the last ten minutes but even that is slowly replaced with panic. It’s frustrating for all of them, so they appreciate Bakugou’s consideration towards them by keeping calm. But it’s only for so long that Katsuki can stay sane.

They’re in an ally with Midoriya and Yaoyorozu who are empty of breath, they’ve been running around searching for Todoroki without any rest.

The sky is turning dark and there still aren’t any signs of him. Kaminari kicks a trash bin in a fit of frustration which is unlike him. Even Bakugou is being quiet which was scary, but no one felt like saying anything.

"What are we going to do now?" Midoriya asks more to himself than anyone else so he’s prepared to not get any answers. It still hurt that this was all their empty promises of protection amounted to.

Yaoyorozu tears are threatening to fall, she's trying hard not to because if she's terrified, just what is Todoroki feeling at this moment? She takes in a deep breath this was not the time to panic. Momo racks her brain for possible solutions, they already called the police, but this is a fight against time, so they need to do everything they can.

She gets an idea to find the direct location of the drug dealers after a short moment of just thinking through solutions. "Wait! guys, I think I know how to find him!"

All three boys look at her shocked at the sudden outburst, she takes out her phone searching through her contacts to find a specific number then dials it, after two rings the person picks up "hello?"

"Shinsou-kun? This is me Yaoyorozu Momo"

From the other end of the call, there is a hint of glee in the person’s voice. "Yes Yaoyorozu-san the diligent girl from this morning, I didn't expect you to call so suddenly! Is something wrong?"

Yaoyorozu breathes in before speaking "Today you told me you worked as a legal hacker for the government as a side job"

"that's right, what about it?" he answers truthfully.

"Is it possible for you to track a credit card, like right now?" The police are on the case but she doubts they’ll get any answers until a few hours later as other crimes are also taking place.

It takes a moment of hesitation before Shinsou speaks again "Yes I can. I would like to believe this has something to do with the recent drug dealers in the area and not you trying to stalk-" he is cut off by Yaoyorozu immediate reply. "Yes, this is for the drug dealers case I can only tell you the name of the person will that do?"

“yes, that will do, I’ll find the location in an instant, I am after all number one in illegal- I mean legal hacking!”

Yaoyorozu ponders on the little stutter that he made but doesn’t question it, it wasn’t the time for that.

After giving the details she hangs up, they wait for a moment then there is a ping from her phone where Shinsou texted her the location, she thanks him profusely and leaves him a request to send the police to that location too.

She smiles brightly at the three who just stand there dumbfound, she frowns when all of them just stare at her without making a move "What the hell are you waiting for?! let's find Todoroki!"

She doesn’t need to say it twice.

xxxxxxxx

"I would like to understand how the fuck you know someone like that?" Bakugou asks while also shouts at the driver to go faster.

Yaoyorozu shrugs, she gives him a small smirk "I make friends with people I might get use for, besides I was running late for today's date with you two for a reason you know"

Bakugou hates the way Yaoyorozu mouths her words especially calling it a date, forget her, he just felt embarrassed about how open she was like that. He is thankful to have her here now, he only has eyes for Shouto so sometimes he forgets how beautiful Momo really is. No wonder she has those connections.

"Please guys don't start fighting until we actually find Shouto safe"

No one dared to talk again until they got there.

xxxxxxxx

Kaminari is the first one out of the taxi running towards the factory, the place is big, it would take a while to find the exact room or place they were at. Right now it didn’t matter so as long as they found him. 

Bakugou goes up the stairs and tells Midoriya to go to the basement while Kaminari and Yaoyorozu check the first floor. He makes sure to tell Kaminari to take care of Yaoyorozu, she is a capable person and can take them on but she’s still a girl.

They all frantically search the place keeping guard for any sound, a scream will do or anything so as long as it gives away the location. They are afraid that Todoroki's refusal to speak won’t yield even here. Shouto is the type to just remain silent no matter the treatment he is receiving. They just hope he doesn’t do that here.

There is a moment of hopelessness as they come up with nothing, Bakugou is about to give up when he suddenly hears it. 

There is a loud scream for help, it echoes through the corridors alerting all four of them. Todoroki Shouto is asking for help using his own voice.

All four run to where the sound came from, it’s upstairs where Bakugou went, he makes it there first to find Todoroki. When he enters the room with an open door his eyes widen in shock.

Todoroki’s eyes are filled with tears that Bakugou hasn't seen ever since the incident from five years ago. Parts of his clothes are ripped, and his shirt is hanging loosely from his arms, his pants are forcibly being dragged down by a man whose disgusting lips are on Shouto's neck leaving marks on the boy's body.

Bakugou refuses to keep calm when he sees the purple trails on Shouto, he wishes he could produce some bombs out of thin air and explode their fucking faces but since he can't, he punches them. He takes out all his anger with his fists until there is not a single trait left of what might have been their faces before.

The others come and help out with the art experiment, even Yaoyorozu slams a fire extinguisher at one of their faces causing a broken nose and blood spilling, he isn't about to wake up from that hit.

When they make sure that the drug dealers have had enough hits they quickly walk to Shouto who just stare at them tiredly, he’s no longer crying.

Bakugou takes off his jacket that is conveniently big and puts it on Shouto he then hugs him into his chest hopes it will calm him. Todoroki might look calm but Katsuki knows he isn’t.

"I'm sorry Shouto, I'm so sorry" Bakugou grits his teeth while his crimson eyes reflect a pain he wasn't fond of. Todoroki has his hand on Bakugou’s arm, his grip tightens, and the ash-blond knows it will leave a mark, but he doesn’t say anything. None of them says anything.

xxxxxxxxxxxx

It takes a while for the police get there and Shouto fell asleep, they assume the exhaustion finally caught up from everything that happened. The police arrest the drug dealers for several crimes with Yaoyorozu and Midoriya talking to them about everything that happened, the case ends like that.

Eventually, they take Todoroki to Kaminari's house because it is the place he was originally going to stay at, but the two other boys decide to sleepover and Kaminari doesn’t object.

They convince Yaoyorozu to go home for the night promising that they won't let Shouto out of their sight. She also had to consider her parents who were worried about her and she shouldn't stay at a place with four guys even if 3/3 were gay or bisexual.

The good thing was that they dropped her off without a fight as she was tired from everything that happened. They needed to thank her properly, if it wasn't for her they might have been too late, or later then what they already were.

Todoroki was sleeping soundlessly in Kaminari's bed and the blond had taken the initiative to sleep on the couch, he was exhausted from work too. Bakugou told him it was okay for him to just sleep and that Midoriya and he knew how to take out the futons.

Midoriya was silent the whole time just looking at the new scars on Todoroki's wrists, they were hideous and went up all the way to his elbows. He was afraid that the scars would remain, they also served as the proof of the struggle Todoroki had done. He already hated them.

Bakugou is glad that Midoriya is good at nursing people because he's more of the type to destroy things and that doesn’t exclude Todoroki, so he leaves it for Midoriya to take care of him.

After Izuku is done patching him up they both stare at Shouto without sharing a single glance at each other. They both know how exhausted they are without talking about it. Izuku is the first one who goes to sleep, and it takes an hour of reassuring himself that Todoroki is fine until Bakugou manages to get a wink of sleep.

Todoroki is here, he is safe.

Chapter Text

The next morning Midoriya wakes up before the others to make something for breakfast so their stomachs won’t be grumbling the whole day, he just can’t rest when Todoroki might be thinking of suicide. Can you blame him? Todoroki feels like a cracked ice that is surrounded by a fire just at its limit to shatter into pieces. Midoryia will do anything to prevent that, the first thing to do however is begin the day with a filled stomach. 

He makes his way into the kitchen searching through Kaminari's properties, he’s glad that the blond is a healthy person who takes his time to cook, there is always food to be found inside his fridge. Midoriya grabs two pieces of bread putting them inside the toast machine then grabs some bacon from the fridge. He folds the sleeves of his shirt getting ready to prepare some food. 

By the time Midoriya is done with the cooking Bakugou has already woken up to the sounds of clattering plates and is following the delicious scent with half lidded eyes. Katsuki scratches his chest at the same time yawning tiredly when he sees Deku.

Midoriya unconsciously takes notes of Katsuki appearance, the guy is wearing a pair of black sweatpants and a tank top, Bakugou seems to really like black lately. "what'cha doin?" Katsuki asks, his voice is husky from the sleep.

Izuku smiles hazily at him, he leans his weight on the table. "Thought it would do good if our stomachs weren't grumbling" he twirls his finger inside his curly hair as he silently watches the ash blond give him a raised eyebrow. Izuku is good at observing so he can't exactly help it when he notices the good looks that Bakugou possesses. It makes him feel insecure about himself thinking that it won’t be much of a surprise if Todoroki falls in love with Katsuki. He looks damn handsome.

"I mean after all that happened. . . this is the least I could do to ease the tension.” He feels a little guilty thinking this way, Todoroki doesn’t judge by appearance. He brushes it away immediately.  “Kacchan would you mind waking them?" 

The expert at bomb diffusion sighs tiredly, he nods and heads back up the stairs. A few seconds later Midoriya's eyes widen when he hears a shout and a running Kaminari who jumps downstairs with a massive bed hair and a toothbrush in his mouth. The panicking blond is running around the house mumbling stuff like 'I'm late for work'. Midoriya watches as he grabs a peanut butter toast and takes a large bite while breathing out a thanks. 

Kaminari gets a hold on the door knob about to leave the place when Izuku calls out to him. "Wait Kaminari!" The blond pauses briefly to look at Midoriya with a questioning look. Izuku gives him a tilted look then raises a finger towards him, Kaminari looks down where Izuku is pointing to, he lets out a small 'oh' when he sees it. 

He is only wearing his underwear with black lightning marks, kaminari laughs a bit then he quickly runs up and grabs a pair of jeans, he makes his way outside shouting a loud 'bye' while slamming the door shut. 

Midoriya sighs at Kaminari’s antics, a few seconds later Izuku gets a distant look in his eyes. He thinks about the past when they were still high schooler, although he still talks with some of them it’s been a long time since he contacts his other classmates. He wonders what they are doing? Wonders if Kirishima is working properly on his job with Kaminari, if LIda is living happily with Hatsume or if Uraraka is still smiling as beautifully as ever. 

Izuku hasn’t seen her for the longest it makes him feel lonely. Now that he moved out and lives alone he is grateful for some company, but she decided to study overseas so he hasn't heard from ever since.

The snapping of fingers in front of his eyes brings him back from his daze to look at a frowning Katsuki who flicks his head to point at Todoroki who is behind him. 

Midoriya nods then puts on a small smile, he doesn’t want to act gloomy he is sure Todoroki doesn’t need that right now. "G-Good morning Shouto... ho-how are you feeling?" The bandages on his arm and the hickeys going from his neck says it all but he stupidly asks anyway.

When he doesn’t answer Midoriya lifts his hands to check on Shouto but puts them down the moment he notices the slight flinch from Todoroki. Of course, he is sensitive to touch! Izuku feels terrible even if Todoroki says he is fine and acts like nothing happened, it did happen, and it did affect him.

Midoriya doesn't get another chance to mess up when Bakugou saves him by sitting down on the table and telling them to get over and eat already. Midoriya heaves a breath sending an appreciative glance towards the ash blond, he is glad that katsuki is unexpectedly.

"A-anyway let's at least eat Todoroki!" Midoriya notices Todoroki pursing his lips with no specific emotion then takes a seat to eat, Shouto just gives him a thankful nod.

Izuku shares glance with Bakugou and it’s all it takes for him to understand what he means 'something is wrong' but between them it’s left unsaid just hoping that their gut feeling isn’t correct. 

 

xxxxxxxxxx

 

Surprisingly the day goes by normal enough apart from the fact that Todoroki stopped even the little writing he used to do, it’s fine Izuku thinks so as long as he doesn't do anything crazy. Midoriya wants to give a free day to Shouto just so he can cope with everything but Shouto has been determined to get some air even if it’s  just going outside the yard. 

Izuku is terrified of shouto disappearing so he joins him, Todoroki doesn’t complain after everything that took place the other day. Bakugou wanted to join but work is an annoyance and although he could have asked for a day off, Midoriya insisted that he would take care of Todoroki, so he could just relax and go to work.

The sudden warmth in his hand drags Izuku back to reality, he wonders why he seems to be in a daze a lot lately. Todoroki has his hand in Izuku’s just like it used to be but there is something about the touch that makes Izuku get warm cheeks. Shouto is holding his hand tightly and Midoriya is aware of how close Todoroki's shoulder against his is. He is further confused when he Todoroki puts his fingers in between his, they’ve never done this before.  

There’s moment of relief from Shouto which Midoriya wouldn’t noticed had it not been for Shouto’s odd behaviour. He is glad that Todoroki isn't avoiding his touch, although he is still a little hesitant. Midoriya decides to focus on the long lashes Todoroki has, the soft lips that are so kissable and his colourful hair and eyes. He wishes they belonged to him.

Midoriya shakes his head at the ridicules thoughts there is no way he has the guts to kiss Todoroki. He still hasn't done it even though Bakugou is practically throwing himself all over Shouto. Of course, he’s wanted to do it because why not? If Shouto isn't going to refuse, then why shouldn't he take advantage of that? 

He brushes away the stupid thoughts that creep into his brain. He doesn’t realize they’ve stopped until Shouto practically shoves the notebook onto his face with the written words 'are you okay?'  

Izuku feels guilty that Todoroki is worried about him despite it being Shouo who is hurting the most. He is about to reply that he is fine just internally tortured by his love for him, but Todoroki flips the notebook to show something else. 'Can we kiss?

Midoriya literally chokes be it out of his own saliva or out of thin air he won’t know cause all he can focus on is the heat rising on his face even though it is the end of autumn. The whole ordeal must have been really exaggerated because Todoroki is suddenly worried for him in a different way.

There is a light frown on Todoroki's eyebrows that looks adorable and once again Midoriya thinks he really must be going crazy. He takes in a deep breath while waving his hands he has a small smile on that tries to hide his red cheeks."I'm sorry, I'm fine I just thought you asked for a kiss, but I've been really weird lately so please just ignore me" 

This time Shouto gives him an angry frown and starts writing something on his notebook again 'But I did ask that!'

From the way Todoroki points to his lips and the way his cheeks are slowly turning red makes Midoriya sure he isn't seeing things. His breathe is stuck in his throat and there is this very uncomfortable warmth that Midoriya really doesn’t appreciate at the moment. 

"W-why would you w-want me to do s-something like that?" he stutterss out feeling disappointed in the way he can't be more aggressive like Bakugou.

Midoriya hates that Todoroki gives him a quiet sigh indicating his unwillingness to explain anything 'so you won't do it?'  

The moment Izuku reads the sentence he blurts out "I didn't say that! I was just wondering why. . ." Todoroki gives him a questioning look that makes him stop. "Okay fine but can it be somewhere less. . . public?" 

He notes how cute Shouto is when he notices that they are in the middle of the streets, it’s good that least there aren’t many who walk around in the cold. Shouto agrees then grabs Midoriya to go somewhere private and Izuku is glad that not only his cheeks are read.

 

Alleyways are always a good place if you wish for privacy when selling drugs and so Izuku can’t help feeling disappointed to have his first kiss with Shouto here. Midoriya knows that the whole thing isn’t right in the first place, but he can still have dreams.

By the time they get there Todoroki has his face so close that their noses are touching. Midoriya knows from the way Shouto looks at him that he is for some reason desperate, but Izuku can’t help but feel excited

He moves his scarred hands onto Todoroki's hip bringing his body much closer, his eyes shift to look at Shouto. Midoriya isn’t sure if Todoroki is doing it on purpose but the way he licks his lips is driving Izuku insane. Just like Izuku had imagined before Shouto’s lips are so soft it makes him want to bite them, so he does. It earns him a gasp from Todoroki, but he knows he likes it. 

Midoriya loves the sounds that Shouto's makes and although it isn't exactly the same as speaking it’s currently enough of an achievement for Midoriya.

His hands travel from Todoroki's hips to the small of his back reaching under his clothes. The touch makes Todoroki heave a breath while the shivers run up his spine, Midoriya is well aware of the coldness of his hands from the near-winter weather.

It doesn't matter the heat of their bodies is all Izuku needs and he is pretty sure from how red Todoroki face is that he agrees.

The thing that really makes Midoriya stumble on pleasure is the way Todoroki unconditionally presses himself closer to Izuku. Midoriya leans against the bricked wall behind him taking Todoroki with him is almost sitting on Izuku's bent leg, but Shouto isn't actually putting pressure on him which he is thankful for. He isn’t sure if he is ready for the next step.

Midoriya slams their lips together he doesn’t want to think about what they are doing, however no matter how much he ignores it he is still bothered by it. This just isn’t right, and he knows Todoroki is just forcing himself.

Shouto is dead weight against him by now and for anyone else it will look as if he is enjoying it, however Izuku sees the slight frown on his eyebrows and has noticed the tight grip Shouto has on him.

Shouto’s face is flushed red from all the kissing while his eyes close just to be able to try and sense everything with his body. His hands are on Midoriya's hair and their lips are moving aggressively against each other. Izuku thinks that Shouto looks beautiful like this but it just makes his stomach hurt the longer they keep this going.

Izuku doesn’t want to care about anything at this moment, all he wants is to get a full taste of Todoroki. They slow down, and Todoroki looks at him curiously, Midoriya grins sweetly and starts nibbling at the boy’s neck covering the already there hickeys with his own hoping that this will cover for some bad memory. 

Todoroki moans when Midoriya kisses his neck and for a few minutes this is all Izuku needs and it feels like heaven, it is addictive and he wants more. Midoriya immediately stops his thought process right there and moves his lips to press against Todoroki's ear calling out his name sweetly. It’s the only way for the boy to hear him out. "Shouto, Shouto. . . listen to me"

Todoroki lifts his head up to look at Midoriya who has gone all quiet "I'd love to continue but we can't do this here and not like this. You're not thinking this through right now, this isn't right. This is the thing you do with-" he stops midway having a hard time to say the words without ripping himself apart. 

The questioning gaze Todoroki gives him makes him let out another breath. "You should only do this with the person you love.” There he said it, this should have been enough but Izuku knows he needs to continue.

“Believe it or not but I'm aware that you know about our feelings and I also know that what you are doing is only because you feel guilty about being a bother.  You will never be so please Shouto love yourself more before you start trying to love us back" 

He attempts to plead with his green eyes it always works like a charm and today is no exception, Todoroki look down he is sad that his behaviour is obvious for Izuku all the time. Izuku just calmly lifts himself off the wall and starts fixing his dishevelled clothes along with Todoroki's because he isn't making any moves to do so. 

Once he is done he takes a hold of Todoroki's hand and walks away from the alleyway only to bump into someone who makes a startled squeak. Izuku is quick to apologize without looking at who it is but the familiar sound of a girl has him move his gaze upwards to see Yaoyorozu smiling brightly at him.

"oh, hey Midoriya-kun, I'm so sorry I didn't see you there, I was chasing my cat- oh no my cat!"

Her happy expression is quickly replaced with worry when she realizes the lack of a pet around her. Suddenly Shouto walks up to them with a black cat holding it dearly to his chest. Midoriya's eyes widen when he sees the way Todoroki's face lights up every time he looks at the cat. This is the first time in a while that Shouto seems to have forgotten his worries and simply just relaxed.  

Either way Midoriya hasn't seen Todoroki so enthusiastic about something until now so he decides he will buy a cat for Shouto. Yaoyorozu looks to have realized Shouto’s like for cats as well.

"Todoroki do you like cats?" she asks and Izuku is disappointed that she got the lead.

The question makes Todoroki hesitate for a split second but when the cat rubs itself against him Todoroki nods, his eyes warm with affection.

Momo has a big smile on that even Midoriya has started to like a bit, it makes the world a little brighter. "You see that cat was originally living on the streets. . . I decided to pick it up, but I can't really take care of it because I am living at my parents’ house and my mom is allergic to them. I was wondering, if it isn't too much of a hassle will you mind taking care of it for me?"

Todoroki looks at her in awe then gladly accepts the offer, it doesn't take no genius to notice how happy Shouto is in that moment.

Yaoyorozu turns towards Izuku who just stares at the sight in front of him. "Midoriya-kun, how is Todoroki doing after what happened?"

The question is a little unsettling as he isn't sure of it himself, on the outside Todoroki seemed to be fine. However, there are a few details or things such as talking (writing) less or that he had asked to be kissed, this is different even though Shouto is never really one to speak much.

"I don't know. . . He just seems to be doing okay?" it’s more like a question thrown at himself but he can't really decide the way Todoroki feels.

Yaoyorozu just nods silently then she speaks again but this time hiding a smirk behind her hand. "I see you guys were doing that kind of stuff, my oh my Midoriya-kun I expected this of Bakugou or even Kaminari but you- how shameful" She fakes a disappointed look at Midoriya who stills instantly.

She points at his dishevelled hair that is more insane now then it usually is and then she points to the new hickey he has made on Todoroki which wasn’t there before.

Izuku's face is as red as a tomato for being caught especially the way Momo's voice is mocking him isn’t making it any better. "No! y-you g-got it wrong-" he falters when Yaoyorozu speaks.

"Relax Midoriya-kun, even if you had your reasons I am not saying anything because as much as I like Todoroki, it's his own decision what he does and who he chooses in the end and I'll perfectly support his answer. But don't get me wrong the war is just beginning I'm not letting that pretty boy out of my hands just yet."

Like this she smiles evilly at him then walks to Todoroki who is still playing with the cat. Midoriya remains a few seconds wondering what she means until it dawns on him that things between all of them can’t always remain like this because all of them have feelings for the same person. Things are bound to change.

Chapter Text

The sound of quiet swings moving back and forth is a soothing melody to the silence hanging in the air between the two who sit side by side at the dawn of day.

Short breaths are taken in slow anticipation of words to be said and a conversation to finally start. Yaoyorozu finds herself smiling at the black cat in Todoroki’s lap purring even if the silence was deafening.

The scene is just beautiful, and the peace is all she can ever wish for if only it was always like this between her and Todoroki. The two of them peacefully bathing in each other’s presence without anyone interfering.

"I've been wondering. . . But did you give her a name yet?" Momo says with reluctance to break the atmosphere. It’s been a few weeks since she gave him the cat, a decision she doesn’t regret.

For a tiny second Yaoyorozu wishes that his deep voice will answer, wonders if its pleasant husk from her memories still remains. That doesn't happen, it never does.

'I thought about it for a while, and I really wanted to name her Valerie'

The name sounds wonderful when Yaoyorozu reads it out loud, much better than Todoroki had thought it would. The reason, he thinks, is that Momo's feminine voice and clear pronunciation brings out the absolute beauty of the name. He appreciates Yaoyorozu a lot more than he had originally thought he would.

"Might I ask you why? Why did you choose Valerie?"

The curiosity gets the better of her like it always does, she just wants to know even the smallest of things about the only person she has ever fallen for.

Todoroki taps his finger on his chin contemplating how to explain it, he then starts writing on his notebook. 'Valerie is the Latin word for both strong and brave. It's something I have lacked all my life, therefore, I want to be reminded of it every time I call after her. She will be my encouragement to become stronger and brave enough to face my fears one day'

The words Todoroki wrote may have not been said by his own voice, it may not have made as much sense to her as it did for him and even though she doesn't know his whole story she is sure at that moment there was a deeper meaning behind the words strong and brave.

She smiles kindly at him hoping that it will explain the things she can't say and has no rights to utter. She is just his friend and that is something she wishes she could change however there are obstacles in her path even if those obstacles are a bunch of guys.

She looks at the black cat jumping down Todoroki's lap to rub on her leg affectionately. Her smile brightens, the same stray cat that used to scratch her every time. "Valerie, come here" The black cat purrs lovingly it lets out a small meow indicating its approval of the name.

Todoroki has that tiny smile which only shows in the rarest of times but lately, after the incident it increased, Momo had noticed it after spending the day with him. He scribbles down a few things then shows it to her while his eyes never leave the cat on the ground. 'I can't call after her yet, but I hope one day my voice will reach her too’

There is a small swelling in Yaoyorozu's heart that clenches tightly just like the times when she starts crying every time life is too hard for her. She wants to hug him and bring him close to tell him that it will be okay, tell him that one day he will be able to speak up without any fears. She wants to tell him to continue trying because he has people who will always be there to support him no matter what.

Yaomomo sits there with no words forming even though her head has so many things to say, slowly the tears fall from her eyes. It isn’t her fault, because although she hasn't known Todoroki for so long and she can’t even imagine the pain he has been through. The fact still remains that the boy she loves no longer voices out his own opinions because of fear, because of traumatic experiences in his past, because he is suffering just that much. Incapable of sharing it with anyone so he's continuously fighting his battles with a broken sword and a shield too heavy to lift.

That is just Todoroki Shouto, the boy with one scar on his flawless face and thousands hidden deep inside away from the eyes.

He stands up from the swing walking to Yaoyorozu whose tears just won't stop. He grabs her slender hand and pulls her up to hug her against him. It’s the most loving hug she ever received, a bit clumsy and awkward, but she knows Shouto doesn’t like skinship. It’s the effort that really matters.

Todoroki doesn’t know why she's crying, he doesn't understand why the girl is shedding such horrid tears, so when she tells him, "you're hurting so much. Always, always alone. I wish I could do something for you" his heart hurts tearing him apart from the inside out. Again, someone is shedding tears for him, the droplets of water that hardly ever come out from him. He is so grateful for her so truly grateful for letting him know of the achievements he has gained through all these years.

She reminds him of all the pain and struggle he'd been going through, something he always pushed behind him but never able to walk over. She lets him know that right now, there is someone shedding the tears for him, someone to protect him even when the situation seems totally hopeless. He has friends to rely on, he will never be alone again like he was in that house.

It has him thinking, maybe it was time to start facing his past, to change something he thought was impossible to do before. Maybe that change had already begun when he, for once, called out for help. This was just the start line of the mountain standing before him to climb. He takes a hold of Yaoyorozu's puffy cheeks, her eyes are red from all the crying. Leaning his forehead onto hers he smiles a tooth showing one looking directly into her black eyes before taking the first step.

"Thank you" 

Chapter Text

The clashing of fists against skin, hearts beating at a rapid rate, intake of breath that barely reaches their lungs before it is out. Bakugou raises his left fist to grab a hold on Kaminari's deep blond hair, he maintains his strong hold on him then slams Denki's head on his knee. The impact would have crushed a few teeth of his, had it not been for the quick reflex of Kaminari to punch Bakugou's knee. This way katsuki's weight makes the punch hurt a lot more than expected when he falls on his foot.

The ash blond grits his teeth in pain and Denki pushes his long bangs with a smirk playing across his face. When Bakugou turns on his back he takes in a long breath, his crimson eyes make contact with Denki's yellow ones, for a brief moment they remain there, a smile spreads on both their faces and Katsuki lets the air leave his lungs as a chuckle escapes with it.

Not a second later Kaminari is laughing with him, he reaches out a hand for Katsuki to grab while still leaving their smiles on. "You've improved, asshole" Bakugou snickers wiping away the sweat covering his forehead. Denki feels his pride rise with the compliment, the everyday hard work finally paying off. "Thanks, couldn't have done it without ya" 

Bakugou sells him a smile before walking away into the changing room, kaminari follows with quick steps. "Anyway, dude there is something I want to tell you" Kaminari says throwing a bottle of water to the ash blond. Bakugou catches it with an eyebrow raised in question "shoot" 

Denki sits down on the bench and starts taking off his shoes "So, I'm giving up on Todoroki" He is at his second shoe when he looks up to Katsuki whom oddly hasn't moved a muscle. The ash blond was in the middle of removing his sweater when he freezes at Denki's words, confusion written all over his face. It had been obvious that Kaminari liked Shouto in more than a friend way, despite that, the blond had never been as initiative as him and Deku. 

So, he is surprised when kaminari suddenly admits it, or perhaps it had been the shock that his rivals lessened by one. Of course, Katsuki wants Shouto for himself, but there is an emptiness that fills in with its disappearance. "Bakugou bro, you okay?" Kaminari waves his hand in front of the ash blonds eyes.

Katsuki blinks a few times then shakes his head to proceed with putting on his shirt. His crimson eyes search the wall for his jeans. "Yeah, how come?" There's a hint of nonchalant in his voice to hide his curiosity. Kaminari seems to believe it, smiling he continues to pack his bag. "I really love him. . ." there is brief pause where Denki just looks at the wall in front of him until he talks again "Maybe a bit too much" 

Bakugou sits on the bench beside him to put on his shoes, eyeing the blond from his side. "Then why you are giving up? never thought you'd stop trying" He notices kaminari looking at him, so he looks back and the silence returns. Denki keeps the eye contact and a small smile appears. 

For one thing Katsuki knows he isn't good at reading other people like Midoriya is, this time though even he knows that the smile isn't a happy one. "You're right, I am stubborn, but not as much as you and Midoriya." He closes the zipper of the bag "and because I truly love him, and I cherish our groups friendship, I think it's finally time to let go" he picks up his bag and walks to the door, turning his head halfway he smiles an eye closing one. "for him, for you and most importantly for myself I think it's about time I give a chance to someone who will return my love because I know how much it hurts when the person you love doesn't" 

 

When Denki is nearly out the door Katsuki shouts back "Pickachu, I hope it'll work out with that person" And the blond is out the door waving his hand as a bye, his laugh echoes at the nickname Bakugou refuses to change. 

 

 

 

He stares at the apple in his hand, its red texture to be precise, he knows that his teeth will sink into its skin and the juice will flow into his mouth. That delicious crunchiness, so sweet and lovable and yet he doesn’t take a bite, just stares at it.

The clock goes second by second, there is that soothing sound from it that assures him the world is still moving, despite the silence surrounding him. He puts the apple down on the table in front of him. Once again, his green eyes memorise the picture that occupies his current interest.

Midoriya takes a hold on one of his curly locks and twirls it between two of his fingers, the few black strands blending in with the green. He thinks back at the times he spent just wasting his whole day by drawing pictures of the red and white haired male.

A small smile appears on his face, reminiscing about those times always brought a warmth into his heart. Then it disappears, he focuses on the years he has spent chasing after him for so long. He wonders about everything that has happened in his past. High school spent secretly eyeing his crush, university spent hiding from his roommate, unemployed days spent with desperation to tell him that he loves him.

But, here he is inside a house that is emptied of anyone. He wants to know what happened to Uraraka, the girl who confessed to him in high school. He hopes she’s found someone good, hopes that she’s doing better with her love life than him. The thought is scary, but he wonders how it would be if he hadn’t rejected her that time and just given up on Shouto.

He instantly shakes his head, he promised never to regret his decision. Somehow all this thinking makes him lonely, he wishes Shouto was here. The quiet guy is spending time with Yaoyorozu, beautiful and humble Yaoyorozu.

He knows that both of them look ideal together, he knows their children would be just as beautiful, he knows that he will never be able to break them apart if Todoroki wants to settle down.

There is a sudden ache in his heart, he really needs to see Shouto.

A call from his phone, it surprises him when he sees Shouto’s name. He picks up instantly, clears his throat and talks “hello”  

The typical silence is all he gets as a response, a few more beats and Midoriya laughs lightly and is just about to start the video, “right, sorry. I’ll start the video-“ he knows the reason why he always waits a few seconds before starting the video is for that small hope that he will be able to hear Shouto’s voice again.

His finger is millimetres from touching the icon with a camera on it and just then he hears the quiet, barely audible “hello”. He forgets to breath for a good few seconds, the silence that follows makes him believe it was his imagination.

But, he hears it again with another quiet whisper of “are you still there?” Midoriya drops the phone to the ground, his eyes widen in disbelief. He manages to keep himself together to pick up the phone. “h-hello?” he stutters, unsure of what to say. “Shouto, is this you?”

Midoriya hears Todoroki take in a shaky breath before the soothing sound of his voice fills Midoriya’s ears. “can we talk?” Izuku feels the tears threatening to fall, he is aware of the relief that comes with every word Shouto says.

Wiping away the unfallen tears with his thumb, Izuku quickly replies “y-yeah, do you want to meet up? Or should we just talk like this?” His first word sounds broken in the sentence, he leans his weight on the sofa’s back with a hand on it.

A short moment of silence passes until Shouto speaks up again, “actually. . . I’m outside your house-“ That’s all he manages to say. Midoriya runs to his door as fast as his feet will take him. He opens it so quickly that the wind gushes past him.

The slight wind ruffling the silk-like hair of red and white, heterochromatic eyes reflecting the blue sky before turning to him. Todoroki holding the phone delicately to his ear, just a meter away from the doorsteps. Izuku thinks that this image in front of him is like art, he wants time to just stop like this.

Unconsciously, his breathing has stopped again until Shouto’s insecure “hi” reaches him. He feels this immense happiness and confusion at the same time. He wants to ask so many things, but instead he opens the door wider and smiles understandingly.

“hey”

Chapter Text

“There are times when it’s going to be hard, but Shouto I hope that no matter what you will forgive me if I ever hurt you”

These are the last words he remembers from her when she was still a little sane, at that time Todoroki didn’t understand why she was saying that. Now he feels that she knew that she was already losing her mind.

It’s the abuse he thinks.

Every day and every night there were screams, shouts and then there were loud sounds. He was always crying, always in pain. He didn’t curse the world back then for that though, there were others who probably experienced worse.

His mother always reminded him of that ‘think positively’ she would say. He was able to be strong and endure because of her. At some point he lost her as well.

Endeavour took it. His father stole it by abusing her until she finally couldn’t stand the simple image of resemblance to him. Of course, that had to be him.

The burn mark on his face a result of boiling water his mother threw at him. It’s not her fault she was just terrified of Endeavour and he just happen to look a little like him.

He kept saying that to himself.

It’s not his father’s fault either, it’s an obsession and a desire just a bit too strong almost like a curse. Yes, it’s just a curse that he put on the family by being alive.

His mother was no longer his ally and it’s probably because of his father’s influence that his siblings grew hatred for him. He doesn’t blame them.

Endeavour continued his strict teachings to make Todoroki the best in business as he never was. It’s the stress that his father always experienced that is why he turned into such monster. Even if his mother is in the hospital receiving treatment now, she will come back and be better was what he thought.

It didn’t happen, his mother turned into a person he no longer recognized. She no longer looked after him and just watched as his father broke him bit by bit. It was no longer mentally but physically too.

His siblings always taunted him, bullied him when his father wasn’t there to hurt him. They were more of the mental pain as he no longer thought that anything could hurt like his father’s punches.

They always blamed him for their mother’s illness, stuff like “it’s because she was protecting you” or other things like “because you were born we all suffer”.

He started blaming himself too. Maybe it really was his fault, everything that happened to him was also his fault.

He is certain that it was his fault when it’s his mother who tells him. She isn’t as forward as the others instead she would give him a cold glare and ignore his pain. Finally, she would whisper stuff like “just die already” “you ruin me”.

He heard them all, it’s probably why he ran away at some point.

His teacher Kazuha Maria found out about the treatment he was receiving at home. She wanted to help him, but Todoroki was too afraid to testify against his parents. Kazuha instead decided to take him into her own home for the time being.

Todoroki thinks that short period of time was his happiest. He loved Maria and her two twins, they became friends quickly. He also became friends with Midoriya and Bakugou at that time too.

Life was good. He got to experience everything he could never do before and maybe that had been a bad thing as he came to realize how wrong his life before was.

He hadn’t gone home for a while and Maria was all he needed, she gave him a home, she was the mother he was never allowed to have.

Nothing lasts unfortunately.

Now he wonders if his father had forced his mother into doing such an act. Wonders if the gun pointed at him was because she really just didn’t love him or was it because it had been Endeavour driving her this far.

Maria saved him just the moment that the gun shot was heard. He remembers her being terrified, she was crying so much but despite that she didn’t hesitate to stand in front of the gun before him.

Why did she have to do that? Why would she risk her life for someone like him who has nothing when she has two children to pick up at school?

He knows why, he just doesn’t know how to accept it “because you are my child” she said. She was bleeding that time, but she still smiled. “it’s not your fault Shouto” that was the last thing Maria said.

He had forgotten about his real mother who looked completely insane by now. The gun was thrown away and Todoroki wondered if she had finally realized what she just did.

“This is not my fault! I didn’t do this, you did! It was your fault!”

He will never forget those words, but he didn’t cry instead he said “you’re right”

 

It’s after that when things finally change, thanks to Maria again. She had called the cops secretly while everything took place. Thanks to that Endeavour was arrested for abuse and his mother was receiving treatment for mental illness because of the abuse.

With Shouto’s words only she would have also been arrested however his sibling held her back and made her a mentally ill person as the best solution for her doings.

They blamed him for being a problem child and causing his parents all this stress. It wasn’t believed by the judge but Shouto sure did believe it.

 

He was living with Izuku until he was of age to move out. He never met his family after that and things were starting to get better. He finally felt that he could move on from it all.

Nothing lasts.

A few years later he meets his mother again with both his brother and sister. That was probably the worst thing that happened to him.

It was an accident. It wasn’t planned but Shouto sure feels like fate is cruel at times.

His siblings despised him. “what are you doing here? You’re a bastard! Get the fuck away from us! You ruined our lives! What more do want!?”
“Just die you rotten monster”

He tried to ignore them, it wasn’t true what they said. Bakugou and Midoriya always make sure he knows that.

It all goes to waste the moment he hears his mother words. “if only I didn’t give birth to you” Her eyes look tired and cold. She looks hateful but mostly regretful.

He wanted to die right there.

 

It was too scary to kill himself, so he needed help. He asked Kaminari who was present when he got there. He feels guilty for asking such a thing from Kaminari but back then he couldn’t focus on anything.

He just wanted to relive everyone of the being that is him, he wanted to be free himself.

The knife at his throat was heavier than he anticipated. He couldn’t move it and the words that his friends said kept him alive. He gave up for them, he lived to see another day only because of them but he wasn’t really living.

Words just never came out of his mouth again. It was too difficult, too much of a burden that was easier to live without.

 

When he completes his story, he is shedding tears. It feels like a boulder has finally removed itself from his heart and it’s painless to breathe again.

Chapter Text

He feels light, the weight that he used to carry on his shoulders seems to be supported by not only him.

Todoroki can feel his muscles slowly start to relax, he never noticed it before but now he is sure that the stress on his body wasn't his imagination.

It's almost unreal how much lighter he feels just by talking about everything, like all that frustration, sadness and self-hatred doesn't seem as hard to tackle anymore.

Lost in his small achievement of freedom Shouto almost forgets the person beside him.

Midoriya has his back turned to him and words have yet to be exchanged but from the way Izuku is shaking Todoroki is aware he is crying. It doesn't make Shouto feel burdened as it used too. Instead, he knows crying for someone often shows how much someone cares for them. 

Nevertheless, Izuku wipes his tears away with his thumb and musters the strength to face Shouto. His eyes are red and there's slight wetness on his cheeks but Shouto doesn't mention it. 

When Todoroki sees him trying to say something, he beats him to it "I didn't tell you this because I wanted an answer, I told you this because I needed someone I trust that would listen." Shouto pays careful attention to every action Izuku makes, he sees the shocked expression and continues. "that's why I don't want you to be bothered by this and feel like you have to do something. You, being here, and listening is all I need."

Talking still feels foreign to him but he doesn't hate it when his thoughts are finally out in the open and not kept bottled inside. His hesitation has yet to disappear completely, but he knows when Izuku smiles at his words it feels right.

"You're right, although I'm not much, I really am happy that you spoke to me about this."  The smiles he gets looks a little uncertain, a contrast from the bright smiles Izuku usually gives. 

 

"Izuku? Are you okay?"  Izuku thinks his name comes out naturally almost like it was meant to be said in Shouto's voice. It makes Midoriya think of how nice Shouto's voice is. He's known this fact since forever though.

Midoriya doesn't say his next words instantly instead he looks a little conflicted "I don't think- I mean it's just that- " He lets out a frustrated growl and finally looks Shouto in the eyes. "there is something you have yet to tell me?"

With Todoroki's eyes widening Izuku is sure that he is spot on, he doesn't pry too much though. After a short moment, Shouto retains his eye contact. "I. . ." a second of silence passes and then Shouto takes in a breath "I will tell you soon but there's something that I hope you can help me with"

If there was any curiosity before Midoriya instantly loses it as he hears Shouto ask for help. It's something that he had wished would happen but never did. It may sound weird being so desperate for someone to rely on you, but Izuku thinks that when the person you love puts their faith in you there is no greater joy.

"I'll do whatever I can"

"thank you"

It feels nice hearing those words instead of reading them, they feel more real this way. "No, no you don't have to thank me for anything at all" there is a deeper meaning to it and Midoriya is aware that they both know it.

Todoroki shares him a smile and somehow this new side of him feels realer than ever. "I'm glad you called Katsuki for me, I didn't think I was ready to face him just yet"

It stings a bit but Midoriya tries not to think too much about it.

"Yeah, no problem at all! But are you sure about all this?" He tries to switch the topic hoping that Shouto would understand. If he does, Shouto certainly doesn't show it.

When he doesn't answer Izuku fears that everything up until now was just his delusion and Shouto never actually spoke. It's the little 'no' from the boy that assures Midoriya that this was real.

"I'm not sure, I'm scared, and I don't want to do this," Midoriya is about to tell him that he shouldn't do it if he doesn't want to but Shouto talks before he gets a chance. "despite that, I know I must if I ever want to live my life freely without being held down by anything. I need to confront my family"

This, Izuku thinks, is understandable, it's a necessity in order for Shouto to move on and he believes it is the right thing. So, he nods and shows a smile that he hopes will give Shouto some assurance. "Just know I'm always here even if you back out and don't want to go through with it, I will always be on your side."

Hearing the small laugh from Shouto reminds him once again why he loves this him so much. He loves him so much that it hurts, but this is normal for the protagonist of a romance novel to be feeling. Love is difficult, he thinks it'll be okay though.

Izuku is confused when he sees Todoroki's eyes widen and a small blush appears on his cheeks. It isn't noticeable to anyone for someone as observant as him, it is.

"Hey, wha'sup?" Izuku knows the voice like the back of his hand, he waits as the familiar presence comes closer to the two of them. 

It's a broken love story, a hopeless one-sided love that isn't going to end in his favor. He's just the second lead in a romance story where doesn't get the guy. Yeah, it was never supposed to be him. It was Bakugou Katsuki all along. 

 

Chapter Text

Shouto takes in a deep breath. This was the moment that was going to change his whole life. the moment where he would finally face his fear. The moment he was finally going to become free. 

He stares at the cursed door in front of him, the iron that it was made from was to keep others out and some inside. It was the only thing standing between him and his nightmares. All he had to do was give it a little push and he would be able to see the man that haunts him. 

He wants to back out and throw away all the courage he had previously built. He thinks it's not worth it. The panic that's rising in him and the sweat that he keeps wiping away with his hands tells him that it's just not worth it. 

But then again he isn't doing it because of finding some worth in it. He was doing it to get over his hell. 

Just when he feels his breath start to uneven he can sense the hand on his shoulder that shocks him out of his momentary panic. He looks up to see crimson eyes staring at him. 

Bakugou Katsuki looks at understandingly and Shouto almost can't believe how this was the same person who frowned every second of the day. It makes his heart melt. This person cared for him enough to lay down their pretense of who they were.

Katsuki gives him a nod. Shouto knows it's an assurance that they can go back home and that no one would blame him if he backed away. He knows because on their way here Katsuki and Izuku had told him so several times. 

They kept on assuring him, assuring him that everything would be alright, assuring him that they would be there for him, assuring him that he didn't need to do anything. 

For once, Shouto felt like he could really believe everything they were telling him. He was going to be okay. 

He opens the door and walks inside. 

His eyes rack the place and he sees the people talking to their beloved from the other side of the glass. Some are crying and others have their hand on the glass as their closest means to the person on the other side. 

Finally, his eyes land on the person that he had come to visit. 

His fathers figure as big as he remembers sits on the chair behind the glass. He's looking down on his hands that are playing with the sleeves of his prison suit. Shouto almost thought he looked a little nervous. 

It's like the previous fright and panic were all gone the instant he saw his father. The man he saw behind that glass was no longer as scary as he used to be. Even as Izuku and Katsuki were holding their breathes he went on to sit on the chair opposite to Endeavor.  

His father looked up at him instantly and when he raised his head Shouto could see the dark scar looming on his face. It was deep an went down almost all the way to his chin. Shouto thought it reminded him of a lot of his own scar. 

Shouto picks up the phone that stood beside the wall, Endeavor does the same. Surprisingly, Shouto is the first to talk. As if his father was scared to, he seemed hesitant in all his actions, just waiting for Shouto to do something. 

When he puts the phone to his ear Shouto takes in one last deep breath. "hey, dad" 

Endeavor looks shocked, Shouto doesn't blame him. He probably expected that Shouto was going to curse at him or say some pretty horrible things. Even Shouto thought he was going to do that. 

However, after seeing his father he didn't feel like saying much. He just wanted to talk to him, ask him how he's been doing. 

"H-hey Shouto" Endeavor's voice is rough like it used to be but something in it is different. He can feel the way his father's voice no longer holds all those deep emotions as before. 

Shouto wants to smile, he doesn't know this person. 

"How have you been? It's been. . . a very long time" He asks because he's actually curious, he wants to know the things Endveaor had been doing in jail for the past few years. He wants to know what happened to the man he used to know. 

"Y-Yeah, it's been a long time. It's- it's been going, you know just trying to fulfill my sentence here in jail." Shouto can't help but compare the weak voice of his father from what it used to be. He seems so hesitant, so remorseful. 

"That's. . . good, it's good." He's saying it as if he was trying to convince himself. He had nothing to convince himself of though. 

Endeavor seems to think about something, his hand goes to scarp at his neck and he avoids eye contact. For a moment he doesn't say anything until he finally looks back up to stare at Shouto. "how- how have you been?" He is afraid to ask stuff and Shouto is well aware of it. 

"I've. . ." he hesitates to turn and look at Izuku and Katsuki who have been standing behind him the whole time. The two of them haven't said a word and Shouto is enternally grateful. Just seeing them is all he needs to go back to talking. "I've actually been doing a little better." He says and his eyes on his fathers. 

Endeavor's eyes widen like he didn't expect to hear an answer from him. Then there is a small smile that makes it way through the man that Shouto can't help but feel shocked about. He had never seen his father smile like that before, it's so different from what he was used to seeing. 

"That's good, it's good" 

It's as if the whole world around Shouto stops and he can only pay attention to the man in front of him. So recognizable and yet so unfamiliar. He doesn't think this man as evil, he doesn't see him as a villain to his story anymore. 

He is just a man in regret. A man who finally looked behind himself and decided to change. 

That's all it takes for Shouto to start talking. He tells him about his issues, his nightmares, his life without a voice, tells him about his friends who were there for him, that he's bisexual and in love with one of them, tells him that he's finally doing better after years. 

Endeavor doesn't stop him even once, he quietly listens as he continues talking about everything that he had experienced in the past few years. When he is finally done Shouto remembers to breathe again. After that, they stay in silence. 

His father doesn't look at him, he doesn't know how to and Shouto could understand that. After all, his story wasn't light. 

"You know Shouto, my sentence is coming to an end soon. . . It's- it's been hell in here actually. Attacked many times, punched, stabbed, fallen into a coma and so on. I've had a lot of time to think for myself. I didn't think I'd ever be able to face you again. That's why I was shocked when I heard that you'd come to visit me." Endeavor looks up at him and stares right into his eyes. "I mean why would you want to come to see trash like me. I've done things that can never be forgiven. I was sure that when I got out of here that I'd leave to a faraway place so that you'd never have to see me again. I thought that would be better for you. Now. . . now I'm not so sure." 

Shouto grips the handle of the phone a little harder, he knew what his father meant. He also knew that his father was aware of what Shouto wanted. He wouldn't let this man get away so easily. 

"I'm- I'm going to stay, I'm going to make it up to you. I won't be able to make you forgive me, I know that. I just want the rest of your life to be better. I want to be able to do at least that." 

Shouto lets himself smile just a little, he hated this person so much, had hated him for so long. Now he just wanted to see where he would go. Watch this person change and try his best. "Alright, I haven't forgiven you for what you did, but I'm looking forward to seeing what kind of dad you'll be from now on." 

If his father was crying and he left the place with a slightly bigger smile than usual then neither Izuku nor Katsuki mentioned it. 

He gave the two of them a long hug when they were finally out of the place. 

"Thank you guys"