GENERAL UPDATE AND SURPRISE GUEST
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[Stiles is seated in front of a microphone. His chair is backwards, and he is leaning forward, chest against the back rest. He is wearing his red hoodie, waving, and smiling broadly.]
[Opening music fades out]
Little Red: Hey all, how’s it going? Things are good here on my end! This is just gonna be a short info-and-update-video, with any luck.
Hey, I was just looking through some old videos and thinking about cleaning some of them up a little, or maybe ditching a couple that I think are covered elsewhere… Drop me a line, offer your opinion?
Also I shaved! I was a little nervous, you know, but I think it’s okay. I can’t stop touching my face now, though. And hey, speaking of fragile masculinity, I was laughing about that video… you remember the time I got all insecure over the “little” part of my handle, and briefly changed to the “more male” Red Ryder? Very masc 5 masc there. [Shakes head] Anyway, I was just laughing because this week in the mail I got a particular item to review that, let’s just say, would make that a very appropriate name!
Sourwolf [far off camera]: You are terrible.
LR: Love you too, snookems! Yup, you-know-who’s here. No wait, not Voldemort. [waves hand] I’m recording this one on a Thursday, though I won’t post it ‘til… Saturday I think? So yeah, sourwolf is off today and we have some stuff planned, but I wanted to get this out since we’re going home for the weekend and I’m not taking a big red plastic dick to my dad’s house to try. That’s just… yeah no.
So this week’s review is going to be a little late.
I do have Sunday’s video all queued up though! If y’all follow me on other things, you know I was visited by the ever-lovely ArteMISmatched, my good friend Allison, who happened to be in town for a publicity thing with the Olympic archery team… For those of you who don’t know her, not sure how at this point but some people live under rocks and that’s nothing to be ashamed of… [louder, over his shoulder] right honeybunch?!
SW: [deadpan, still off camera] I am breaking up with you.
LR [grinning, back to the camera]: Anyway, yeah. She’s made a massive splash in the, like, general media, as the transgal who took silver in Rio; she does a ton of work with kids and teens, both through US Olympic stuff and on her own, which is a lot of what her channel is; and she’s from my hometown! We’ve been friends for, like, a million years, ever since she transferred for high school and took up with my brother-from-another-mother. Oh buddy. She was so far out of his league, and they fell so hard for each other…
[Pretends to wipe a tear]
Anyway, so yeah, Ally was in town and we took a little bit of time and recorded some stuff! The first part of our confab will be posted here, on Sunday morning. We chatted about some of the differences in experience between coming out as a translady as opposed to a transdude… Ah, we touched on a lot of things from, like, physical and biological challenges, to social reception, to the straight up- hah! Pun!- straight up legal ramifications… especially in athletics.
At the same time, Ally is going to post the second half of our conversation over on her channel… go check it out! We talked about coming out when you don’t have to be first, and when you do, and about the importance of having other trans folks around… and queer allies and role models in general. It was a really good conversation, I think, and I hope you will too. And we had an excellent time! I always have a blast with her…
You know, it’s funny? Her boy and I have been best friends for, like, ever. And when he fell for Allison… it was a little rough at first, not gonna lie. She was just… she was an outsider, you know? And he had always been my best friend, and my biggest supporter… like way back, before I even had the words or, like, the understanding myself to explain my situation to our parents… he always had my back. He just got me, you know?
And here she came, all perfect hair and adorableness, and suddenly I felt like I was loosing my best friend. And it took a while for us to all figure out how to gel and be cool with each other, you know?
And these days, I see Ally so much more, and I know what’s going on in their lives much more from chatting with her… And he’s still my brother, especially since our folks are, like, actually married now… But I am at least as close to her. Maybe closer.
And guys? One of these days, she’s gonna finally let our boy marry her. He’s been, like, ready to go, ‘say the word’, on the edge of his seat since, like, day two. They’ve mostly been waiting ‘til she feels comfortable fielding the “are you changing your name”, “are you having kids”, “does this mean you’re gay” bullshit, since she’s the one that’s like, famous…
Yeah. Someday, probably pretty soon, she’s gonna marry him, and actually be my sister.
[stops talking, stares, eyes a little wide]
I’m gonna have a sister. I- I’ve never had a sister. That’s… that’s something. That’ll be the biggest my family has ever been.
[pauses for another moment, clearly trying to gather his thoughts and get back on track… and a hand comes around from behind the camera and settles on his shoulder. Derek steps into view, sliding his hand to the other shoulder, shoving Stiles forward a little, sitting down behind him, and wrapping his arms around him, resting his chin on Stiles’ right shoulder.]
SW: I have had sisters. They are awesome.
[Stiles laughs a little hysterically, and wipes a hand across his face. He looks at Derek.]
LR: Yeah, yours are definitely awesome. Also scary. Also they watch this show sometimes [turns to camera] not when we talk about sex, though, [back to Derek] so now they know you liiiiike them.
[Derek slides a hand over Stiles’ mouth to silence him]
SW: I’m sorry you all have to deal with this. You’d think after ten years of practice, he’d be able to stick to his outline but—
[Derek breaks off, grimacing in disgust, pulling his hand away from Stiles’ mouth.]
SW: You. You?
LR: Licked you.
SW: The licking I’m used to. The gum is gross.
[Stiles is smug. Derek shows his hand to the camera where Stiles has wedged a gob of gum between his fingers. His face shows how grossed out he is as he reaches down below the camera’s view and shakes his hand. The mic pics up the sound of the gum hitting a trash can liner. Derek straightens and wipes his hand on Stiles’ sleeve, leaving a wet spot. Stiles just smiles.]
LR: Okay, my dashing and dynamic crew, that’s pretty much it: Review is gonna be late, but the Sunday video will be on time, and there’s a bonus video on Ally’s channel to make up for it. Go check it out, show her some love, and maybe check out the rest of her channel if you haven’t. There’s some cool stuff on there.
Otherwise, things are really good here, except that there will be no more sex for, like, four days. [sighs dramatically. Derek rolls his eyes, but he’s blushing a little] But what can you do? Ah well, I hope things are just as good where you are! We need to pack and do some last minute stuff… and then we are off! Stay safe, stay in touch, and we’ll catch you next week!
[Blows a kiss.]
[Outro music plays.]