He’d refused to close his eyes.
Even as the biting cold stole his breath away and ice began to steal over his vision he kept them open.
And as cold as he was, so very deathly cold, he was warmer than he’d ever been. So proud.
Wanting to take that final vision of his boy his boy with him, to whatever awaited him on his way to his uncelebrated grave.
And as darkness stole the light from his eyes, Yondu Udonta was satisfied.
He’d done a lot of bad in his rotten life. A lot of things most beings would deem unforgivable even.
But this one thing, raising this one boy. Saving his idiot son so’s as he could save the galaxy again from its own fool self.
He done right by Peter at the very least.
He could regret the bad.
Should have been a better daddy. Shouldn’t have been so damn scared to let that boy crawl his way into his heart.
Shoulda kept a tighter hold on them damn Ravager Crew of his. Told them all straight up that having a son don’t make nobody soft.
It makes you stone cold an’ all the more dangerous. Reckless like. Like taking on a planet stupid, or flyin to your death in space to save em.
Should have never taken Ego’s deal, an’ broke the code. But for all he regretted handing over all them kids, Yondu couldn’t quite regret taking that deal... got him his hands on Pete after all. And he’d do a lot to keep that boy living...
Did. Heh, always knew that boy’d be the death of him. His boy.
Yondu floated in the black. Ruminating.
So, yeah he had a lot of regrets. Lot of things he didn't regret either. But that just goes to show. He wasn’t ever gonna end up a good man when is all said and done. Was a goddamned miracle that Pete'd turned out as good as he'd done, what with him raisin him up. Mother'd probably been a goddamned saint.
Perhaps? Perhaps what? Yondu thought indignantly, a little perturbed he could still think at all.
Yondu Udonta is a bad sonuvabitch and there aint nothing and no how he’d ever been good for that boy.
He'd been greedy, he'd been selfish. He'd kill folks and think nothin of it. He'd gotten all them kids killed cause the money'd been too good. He'd stole things for no other reason than cause he could. And worst of all he'd been a goddamn piss poor excuse for a daddy...
Yondu Udonta was a bad man and he deserved all what was commin to him. So what’s all this perhapsin’ about.
And what's all this floating around in this nothin and black about too while they’re at it.
Hell, He hadn’t been expectin’ no angel choir... and Stakar... Stakar had made it pretty damn clear that he’d never get to hear the hoards or see the colors of Ogord. And why the fuck would he, Yondu had broken the code and that’s that. So fuck them too... So there aint nothing for him to be expecting on the other side... But he’d expected maybe something...
But fuck that right.
So what the fuck are they waiting around for. Wasting eternity floating around. Get to the hell-fire and damnation already, he’d certainly earned it.
Or, Yondu thought, with a kinda sinking feeling that felt a lot like despair, Was this all that his wasted fuck up life of sin an' greed had gotten him... A whole fat lot of nothin.
A flash of color split the blackness.
The Colors of Ogord flared into the blackness.
With a brightness that would have had him shielding his eyes if he could, Yondu could only stare in awe as the lights and colors washed over him, a tumultuous emotion stealing his voice, as an endless ache eased inside him even as he felt another squeeze like a painful fist around his heart. A hundred endless lights filling the darkness with luminous color. And from the silence came the sounds of thousand voices raised.
A wordless roar, a cheer. A rallying cry and lament all in one.
Well would you look at that, Yondu finally managed to choke out into the colorful void, a coarse rasping whisper, I’ll be goddamned to a ravager's after life after all.
Yondu's smile dropped as that same voiceless, presence-less entity whirled around him, whipping about the void at a dangerous pace.
The colors of his funeral where whipped about, bleeding into one another as they were tugged about the void. Flickering and shining, like plasma fire. Swirling into a circle faster and faster, with Yondu in the center of it all, until all he could see was endless moving light....
Then just as suddenly it all stopped.
And Yondu Udonta woke up.