Work Text:
"Wright Agency, this is Phoenix Wright speaking."
"Wright. Thank God. Are you alone?"
"Well, I -"
"I'm afraid I don't have time for innuendo right now."
"I am. Polly and Athena are in court today against your new girl. And Trucy's still at school."
"Turn on your television."
---
Hello, you've reached Adrian Andrews. I'm sorry to have missed you, but if you'll leave a message, I'll get back to you as soon as I can. Thank you for calling!
"...is this foolish...
"...Ah. Adrian Andrews. According to your schedule you should be free at the moment, I assume that your day - much like mine - has not gone entirely to plan. Please return my call at your earliest convenience.
"And I insist that you make an appointment with a proper optometrist before Christmas, as I said yesterday. My brother sees Dr. Matthew Kadokawa. My address book is in the center desk drawer."
---
- KTLA news special report. Police are urging the public to stay away from the downtown area, particularly the streets just north of City Hall, where a hostage situation is in progress at the Prosecutor's Office. An as-yet unidentified person has claimed to have planted a bomb and is threatening to detonate it should anyone attempt to leave the building. Reports -
"Miles. Are you -"
"I'm in my office, Wright."
---
Hello, you've reached Adrian Andrews. I'm sorry to have missed you, but if you'll leave a message, I'll get back to you as soon as I can. Thank you for calling!
"I...I was distracted earlier and I neglected to leave a portion of my message. I was calling to say... I was calling to say that I...I care very much what you do, Adrian Andrews. Very much."
---
"Are you sure it's not a hoax? I mean people make these threats all the time -"
"The officer from the bomb squad left the room a few minutes ago. They confirm the presence of the device...the news crews should be updating their reports in just a minute or two."
"Who's in court today? Klavier? Simon? Oh, God, Miles, is Fran there with you, she's only visiting -"
"Everyone is - everyone's here, Wright."
---
"Finally you pick up your phone, Herr Forehead."
"Make it quick, Klavier, I'm only on a recess right now."
"How very unsentimental you are."
"Look, if you're just interested in flirting with me, save it for dinner, okay?"
"...actually, Forehead, I am...I am not sure about dinner, ja? Something has come up at the office."
"Something always does."
"Ach, I...Ich liebe di-"
"Gotta go now, call me back."
---
"It was a light day on the court calendar. Whoever this is must have known that, I've communicated as much to the detective in charge."
"How are they all?"
"They're all on the phone right now, I presume. The lines are intact and of course most of them have cells. But everyone is holding up admirably, with the exception of Gaspen Payne. He apparently thought he could run for the fire exit and escape anyone's notice."
"That rat -"
"Though it seems that his elder brother has a decent left hook, when it comes down to it. And fortunately...or perhaps not so fortunately, we have no shortage of police personnel here at the moment. Gaspen is handcuffed in the ninth floor breakroom under the supervision of two deeply unamused narcotics officers."
---
I'm Athena's phone! If you want to talk to Athena, you're gonna have to go through me!
There's the sound of a bird, then silence.
---
"Miles, if you let anything happen to yourself I'll convince Maya to...help me haunt you in reverse, or something. You realize that if the Prosecutor's Office gets blown up, the best defense agency in the city is going to be completely incapacitated."
"Wright. If the Prosecutor's Office gets blown up, the Los Angeles Superior Court is going to be completely incapacitated."
"That too."
"I've already sent Gumshoe to pick Trucy up from school. Don't argue, please, I need to keep him from making a nuisance of himself and coming down here. He'll retrieve Apollo and Athena once their trial is over for the day as well. But I offered your hospitality to two other people."
"Gumshoe and Maggey?"
"Well. Possibly four. You remember Adrian Andrews."
"Of course. I - of course. She's always welcome here."
"And Gert Payne."
"I don't think I've ever met -"
"You'll like her, Wright. Everybody does. She lectures Gavin about motorcycle safety and calls him 'liebchen.' And she refers to Blackquill as 'sweetie' for that matter."
"They put up with that?"
---
I don't know, Winnie, is it working? Ooh, it is. Hello! This is the Payne residence! Please leave a message and we'll call you back at the beep! Oh, be quiet, Winnie, you know I hate these things.
"Gert? Gertie, it's me. If you're waiting to pick up -
"Guess you're still at work. Well. I guess you would be.
"I just wanted to say I love you, honey bunny. Just...wanted to say that.
"And I think we should...maybe this weekend, we should sit down and talk about it. I think I might be getting ready to retire. Not because of - well.
"It's been a crazy day - you know, I punched Gaspen. I punched Gaspen. Remind me to tell you all about that."
---
"Miles?"
"Yes?"
"If I'm looking after all of these people, you...you look after all of yours, okay?"
"I am trying."
"...Miles?"
"Yes?"
"Long live the Prosecutor's Office. Someone has to get the bastards."
"May I quote you?"
"Only to the troops, Herr Commandant. Not to the press. Speaking of which, the news is back on."
- our sources say that communications with the individual responsible have been moving at a glacial pace, and authorities are urging everyone to remain calm. This is Lisa Kim with KTLA -
"Wright, I..."
"You're busy."
"No, I...well, yes, but..."
"If there's anything you need me to do - "
"I wonder if you would stay on the line for a while. If that's not too much to ask, I don't want to tie up your telephone, but -"
"As long as you need."
"I do apologize for asking -"
"Miles, it's - of course. It's okay."
"...Thank you."
"We'll keep dinner warm for you. I hope you eat pizza. I've never seen you eat pizza."
"I'm sure I'll manage. Wright."
"What?"
"...Thank you."
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