He's in Paris. The sun is shining, highlighting the beauty of the old buildings that line the streets. The city is bustling, a labyrinth with something new around each corner. Today he has no commitments, no plans, free to spend his time at leisure in a place he's dreamt of visiting for so long.
And he's miserable.
He hates it. The sun is too bright, blinding him as he wanders the boulevards. The old buildings are merging into one and he's sick of seeing them. The crowds are too much, people everywhere jostling him. And all the free time - shit, that's the worst. Far too much time to think.
Yoongi's really regretting coming to this stupid place. He should have just taken the hit and lost the money. But, well- he had his pride too. Staying at home would have been like admitting that this whole thing had got to him, that he was hurting, struggling with being on his own. He wasn't about to do that.
Yoongi sighs, lifting up his camera again and adjusting the settings slightly as he focuses on the structure in front of him. He's not sure what the big deal is really - it's not that impressive. He lines up the shot anyway. His mom would kill him if he went all the way to Paris and didn't photograph the Eiffel Tower. Once the shutter closes Yoongi checks the screen. He's reasonably satisfied with it so flops down onto the grass.
It's ridiculously hot despite it not even being midday yet. He's regretting wearing his black jeans today, but there's not many other options. Being so unexcited about this trip meant that packing was left to the night before, resulting in a wardrobe entirely inappropriate for summer in Europe. He tries rolling his jeans up his legs a little but the material is too tight and he swiftly gives up.
Yoongi takes a sip of water from the warm plastic bottle in his hand, eyes scanning the throng of people around him. Couples everywhere. Cuddled up regardless of the heat, taking in the view. Endless rows of arms held out to take the ultimate romantic selca. He feels a wave of nausea. Yoongi almost looks away until he spots a guy on his own. He's got one of those godawful sticks with his phone attached to the end for taking pictures of himself. Yoongi feels an urge to go over and snap it. He's been accidentally battered by enough of them during his stay here.
He gazes around more, trying, really trying, to appreciate where he is, but he simply can't. He was meant to be here with Yujin, not on his own. This was meant to be the adventure of their lives, quitting their jobs to see the world together. It was never meant to be like this.
Yoongi takes a deep breath, trying to steady himself before his mind delves into the usual painful thoughts; memories of the short it's over, I've met someone else sent to him two months ago, ending three years of a relationship and countless dreams for the future in those few words. Yoongi forces himself to look up and distract himself, but he's just met with the sea of couples again. Well, apart from-
Yoongi squints a little in the sun. The lone guy from before is contorting himself into some bizarre position to take his selca. He doesn't seem satisfied with any of the photos he's taking, moving from a crouch, to laying down, to bending into some truly odd postures. He's smiling wide for every shot. He looks like a madman. Yoongi can hear a bright laugh drift over. God, he might actually be insane. Yoongi stands up ready to leave, the guy's happiness making him irrationally angry.
He needs to get out of this heat. He opens up his guide book to find somewhere indoors to pass the time. Yoongi ignores the dull twinge in his chest when he sees certain places circled in pencil; restaurants he'd picked in advance for loved-up dinners, sights he thought that Yujin would enjoy. Yoongi may not be the biggest romantic, but he cares deeply for those close to him and he had wanted to make this trip as close to perfect as possible.
He deliberately turns the page, skipping to the Museums and Galleries section. He scans the page before settling on the Louvre. He gives a quick last glance over at the annoying selca guy. He's sitting cross-legged on the grass, scrolling through his photos and smiling to himself. Yoongi shakes his head before walking off.
The queue to the museum is unbearably long and Yoongi's mood worsens as he waits to buy his ticket, but once he's inside it's mercifully cool and it quells his annoyance just enough. After taking a moment to appreciate the wonder that is air-conditioning he purchases one of the guides in Korean so that he can understand a little more of what he's looking at. He enjoys purely looking at art, simply taking in the beauty of the piece and how it makes him feel, but it's sometimes nice to understand the artist's intentions too. He picks a direction at random and sets off.
He works his way around the rooms slowly, the experience almost verging on sort of pleasant. That is until he walks into one of the the rooms to see the crazy guy from the Eiffel Tower. Yoongi sighs internally. Does the universe hate him that much?
The guy is now posing in front of a Rembrandt, doing some kind of seductive pout, which is fucking ridiculous in this setting. The outstretched stick he's holding onto almost pokes out the eye of a passing visitor. His pout immediately drops into an embarrassed smile at the action, instinctively calling out an apology. Yoongi can't help but notice that he speaks Korean. The woman who nearly lost an eye clearly doesn't though and seems a bit alarmed by his shout. Yoongi quickly heads into another room.
The next room holds some huge paintings, scenes of despair and horror, and Yoongi spends a while in here. It seems to suit his mood. He wanders from frame to frame, carefully examining the art inside. He has so many things he wants to say, small observances and ideas that he only wishes to share with Yujin. Yoongi feels the pang of loss in him again, wishing so badly that he was here. He wants to feel hatred for what's happened but he doesn't. He just feels an overwhelming sadness.
Yoongi tries to bring his attention back onto the paintings, making sure to focus on all the minute details. A severed head here, a cowering peasant there. His viewing is interrupted however by the rumble of his stomach, reminding him that he's missed lunch. Yoongi figures there must be a cafe in here somewhere so pulls out the small map, examining it. He locates one on the floor plan, trying to find his current position so that he can work out how to get there. He's looking down at the map as he walks, the prospect of food taking most of his attention.
He lets out a small noise of pain as something collides with his forehead, hitting him just above the eye. He looks up to glare at the culprit and god, seriously? His gaze falls on the selca guy, who is standing in front of him, looking absolutely mortified.
"Oh god, I'm so sorry!" he apologises, lowering the offending stick. "Are you okay?"
Yoongi doesn't reply, just keeps glaring at him. He rubs pointedly at the spot where he was hit, though truth be told it doesn't hurt that much. That doesn't make him glare any less though.
"Uh, speak English?" he tries again, clearly thinking that Yoongi doesn't understand him.
"I'm fine," Yoongi mutters in Korean and the guy looks relieved at not having to attempt any more of the conversation in English. He smiles brightly.
"Are you sure?" he asks, stepping close to Yoongi and leaning in to inspect the spot on his forehead.
This guy clearly has no concept of personal space and Yoongi backs away sharply, causing the brunette to look rather sheepish but still smiley. A few people glance over at their strange interactions. The guy bounces on the balls of his feet.
"Look, can I get you a coffee to apologise?"
Yoongi can't think of anything worse than coffee with this energetic ball of happiness. "No thank you," he says tersely.
He starts to walk off but the man is back by his side. "Please let me. I feel awful."
"I just want to look at the art," Yoongi sighs, despite the fact that he's actually heading to the cafe anyway. This guy does not need to know that information.
"Well, tonight then. I'll get you a proper drink. I found this great bar-"
"Look, thanks for the offer, but I prefer being on my own," Yoongi replies. He knows it's not true; he'd give anything for Yujin to be by his side right now. Just not this guy.
The other man chews on his lower lip thoughtfully. "Okay, sure. Sorry again!"
Yoongi nods and walks away. He buys a sandwich at the cafe, finding an empty table to sit at to eat. The sandwich is bland and he desperately misses food from home. He misses his best friend and his family even more. He feels very alone again, and not for the first time he regrets going on this stupid trip. And this is just country number one. He's still got a whole lot of Europe to cover. The thought of all the train journeys and hotels and days alone hangs heavily over him. Is this loneliness worth it just to prove some idiotic point that's he's doing okay? Because he's clearly not.
Yoongi takes one more bite before chucking the crust of the sandwich onto the plate, not wanting to eat anymore. He sighs and leans back in his seat. The waitress comes over to take his plate and leaves him a receipt. He furrows his eyes a little because he's already paid at the counter. He's about to explain this to her but she's already rushing off, another customer calling her over. He picks up the piece of paper and sees that it's covered in small, scribbled writing.
So I guess you took a break from looking at all the art.
If you change your mind about that drink, I'll be at La Fourmi tonight at 8
See you there?
Park Jimin (the guy who hit you in the face)
Yoongi blinks down at the words a few times, letting them sink in. He then looks up and glances around. Is this guy – Jimin - watching him read it? His eyes scan around the café but Yoongi can’t see him. He looks back down once more before stuffing the receipt into his pocket and standing up. His first impression of the guy was right – he’s completely insane.
Yoongi spends another few hours in the Louvre. He of course goes to see the Mona Lisa, but the crowds of people jostling to view it annoys him and he doesn’t spend long there, just snaps a quick photo to send to Namjoon. He tires of the paintings and so moves onto the sculptures. He tries to take his time to appreciate them but they're not really doing anything for him, not like the paintings. Eventually he reaches the point at which he can’t take any more art. Yoongi's guide book tells him that if you looked at every piece in the museum it would take you a hundred days. Yoongi thinks a couple of hours is definitely as much as he can handle.
He wanders back to his hotel along the Seine, grateful for the small breeze that has appeared. It makes the walk a tad more bearable. Small boats cruise up and down the river, tourists snapping pictures as they float past. Street artists are painting, lining the pavement with their artwork. There's so much to look at, to interact with, but Yoongi has no interest in doing so. God, he hates this loneliness. He’s never had a problem being alone, but there’s a difference between choosing to be on your own and this relentless crushing loneliness, the absence of another person impossible to ignore.
Yoongi finally makes it back to his hotel. After a few attempts he eventually manages to turn the key in his lock with the correct flick of the wrist needed for it to actually open and he squeezes into the cramped room. He and Yujin had piled all their savings into a travel fund for the last year but still, this is Europe in summer and his Euros don’t stretch very far. He chucks his phone and wallet down on the dingy single bed before wrestling open an ancient window to let some air into the stuffy room. He grabs a cigarette from the packet on the tiny table and lights it, hanging his head out of the window as he smokes. He doesn’t even enjoy it; smoking is purely a habit now.
He remembers the night he first saw Yujin standing outside that club, an aura of sexiness around him as he laughed, teeth flashing on a handsome face, cigarette dangling from his fingers. The excited flutter in Yoongi's stomach when Yujin had caught his gaze, beckoning him over. The attraction had been instant, despite Yoongi’s awful attempt at pretending he smoked too. He had descended quickly into a loud coughing fit but Yujin had pretended not to notice, spared him the embarrassment. It all seems so long ago, now.
Yoongi flicks ash from the cigarette angrily. He needs to stop thinking about Yujin; it’s driving him mad. He hears his phone buzz from the bed. He finishes the cigarette before retreating back into the gloomy room, flopping down onto the bed and picking up the phone
Stop trying to pretend like you’re all cultured and shit
It’s sent in response to the earlier photo Yoongi sent him of the Mona Lisa and it causes Yoongi to smile a little. He reads onto the next message.
He misses his friend. He met Namjoon at a concert a few years ago when he'd had accidentally spilt his entire drink on Yoongi. Yoongi had been ready to kill but then Namjoon had noted the band on his shirt; they started chatting about music and kept in touch ever since. Their shared passion for music may have been the basis of their friendship, but over the last few years they have come to share most of their lives with each other. Namjoon never fails to make him laugh and yet also will always be there for Yoongi in the tougher times too. He’d been a key supporter of Yoongi’s decision to take this trip alone after the break up, declaring that Yoongi was never to let other people hold him back.
are YOU okay?
It’s a nice feeling to know that someone cares for him, that Namjoon can see through his façade of bravado.
I will be
Yoongi’s not entirely sure it’s true.
They message back and forth for a little while until Namjoon eventually has to sign off to sleep, and Yoongi realises that it’s the early hours of the morning back home. He scrolls through some of his social media sites for a while, not paying much attention. Most of these people are just acquaintances, Namjoon being his only close friend, but he still scrolls out of boredom.
Then suddenly, Yoongi sees him. In the background of one of the photos - at a party by the looks of things - he sees Yujin. But he’s not alone. An unknown man clings onto his arm, laughing at something Yujin must have said. He’s tall like Yujin, hair dyed a light purple, and the sleeveless top shows that he clearly works out. This is him. This is the guy Yoongi’s been dumped for.
Yoongi can’t tear his eyes away from the photo. He knew Yujin had met someone else of course, but to actually see it. Shit, it just makes the whole thing so much more real. So much more painful. Tears sting Yoongi's eyes, threatening to spill, but he blinks them back. He's nauseous, the taste of stale smoke in his mouth now cloying and sickening. He locks the screen and slams his phone onto the mattress. Fuck him. Fuck him. God, how Yoongi wishes that he didn’t care so much.
He needs a drink. Alcohol always helps him stop caring. He wants - no, he needs, to wipe all of this from his mind. The thought of an evening drinking alone, well, it’s pretty pathetic but he’s not got much choice. Desperate times, desperate measures and all that. Yoongi pauses as he stands up, hand slipping into his pocket and retrieving the scrunched up receipt. He reads it again, slowly. Sure, this Park Jimin seems somewhat annoying, but it’s got to be better than getting trashed on his own right? More acceptable at the very least.
Yoongi showers and gets changed into another variation of black jeans and t shirt combination from his unimaginative suitcase. He looks himself over in the mirror before leaving. His face looks tired and his dyed blond hair is a bit too scruffy, but it'll do.
It’s a few minutes past 8pm when he eventually finds the place. It looks quite busy and Yoongi’s not looking forward to the awkward period of searching for what is essentially a stranger in the crowded bar, but once he gets nearer he sees that Jimin is already sitting at a table outside. The dark haired man is leaning over a menu, scrunching up his eyes as he tries to make out the words. Yoongi hesitates a moment. What is he doing? This is completely ridiculous - he should just leave now. He’s about to turn around and head back when Jimin looks up.
“Hey!” he exclaims. “You came!”
Well there’s no backing out of this now. Yoongi stands there dumbly for a moment as Jimin pulls out the other seat for him, an excited grin on his face. He allows himself a few more seconds of hesitation before stepping forward and dropping into the seat.
“Yeah, I came,” he echoes, his tone much less excited. Jimin’s grin doesn’t falter however.
“I’m Jimin,” he introduces himself, despite Yoongi already knowing this. “So what’s your name?”
“Yoongi,” he replies.
Jimin considers it for a moment, as though deciding whether he deems this a suitable name or not. “Yoongi. Okay. At least I can stop referring to you in my mind as cute blond guy.”
Yoongi’s eyes widen at Jimin's comment. Did he hear him right? Jimin keeps on smiling as though he’s said nothing out of the ordinary.
"Right," Yoongi says, because what exactly is he meant to say to that?
"Come on. You were totally referring to me as sexy gallery guy in your mind," Jimin teases, his face turning into what Yoongi supposes is meant to be a seductive pout.
"Actually it was annoying selca guy," he admits, and for a moment he feels a little bad at being so brutally honest. Jimin stares at him for a long few moments before bursting out laughing.
"Okay, I'll take that," he grins sheepishly.
At least this Jimin has a sense of humour. It helps Yoongi relax slightly, though he’s still finding this all weird as fuck. He needs a drink. Jimin's still grinning maniacally and Yoongi quickly tries to steer the conversation elsewhere.
“So, um, anything look good?” he asks, nodding towards the menu.
“I have no idea,” Jimin admits. “I can’t read French.”
The waitress chooses this moment to come over to their table, asking something in rapidly spoken French. Yoongi assumes that she’s asking for their choice of drink, so he replies with a vodka tonic and Jimin plumps for a wine.
“Gotta have wine in France,” he explains and Yoongi rolls his eyes slightly. Jimin pays no attention. He folds his arms, leaning on the table. “So, where in Korea are you from?”
“Daegu,” Yoongi answers. “You?”
“Cool. I have a friend from Daegu. I live in Seoul but I'm from Busan originally. Have you ever been?” Jimin asks.
“I went there with my family once or twice when I was a kid,” Yoongi recalls. He decides to leave out the more recent trip he took there with Yujin, a birthday surprise that took a lot of planning on Yoongi's part to keep secret.
“Yeah, a lot of people go there on vacation,” Jimin says. “It can get a bit crowded on the beach in summer, but it's worth it to live somewhere so beautiful. I miss being near the sea.”
Yoongi nods, not really sure what to say. It feels like it’s been a long time since he’s held an actual conversation with someone else, even though he’s only been here for a couple of days. He struggles for a response.
“Yeah. The sea's nice,” he says stupidly. Apparently solitude has rendered him something of an idiot.
Jimin raises an eyebrow at him and smirks a little. “Yes. The sea is nice,” he repeats, his tone gently mocking Yoongi.
“Ah. Drinks,” Yoongi says as the waitress returns, glad of the interruption.
He gratefully accepts his glass, taking a gulp a little too eagerly. Jimin’s other eyebrow raises. He lifts his wine glass and clinks it against Yoongi’s glass while it's still raised to Yoongi's lips, making a belated cheers. Jimin leans back in his seat, still holding the wine glass in his hand and twirling the stem between his fingers.
“So. What brings you to Paris?’” he asks.
“Ah, long story,” says Yoongi dismissively. He takes another sip of his drink. “How about you?”
Jimin immediately launches into telling the story of his journey to Paris. Of planning the trip with a friend, of the friend having to drop out, of him still wanting to take the trip. Yoongi finds out that he’s training at some sort of dance school, taking the summer before his final year to see some of the world.
"So what, you're some sort of ballerina?' Yoongi asks after gulping down another mouthful of his drink. The vodka tastes good, the subtle burn in his throat providing a nice distraction.
Jimin snorts. "Not exactly. I'm training in contemporary dance."
Yoongi stares at him blankly as though the other man's speaking a different language. He takes another sip of his drink. Jimin rolls his eyes at the look of incomprehension on Yoongi's face.
"Like, the clue's in the name. It's more modern. I like more hiphop influenced stuff, but I'm open to trying a lot of different styles."
It's Yoongi's turn to raise his eyebrows now. He wasn't really expecting that. "I see," is all he says.
"I can show you some videos of my dances later," Jimin offers, and Yoongi can think of nothing worse.
"Cool," he nods anyway.
He takes yet another sip of his drink. There's a long silence and Jimin just keeps looking at him and smiling. What the hell is up with this guy? Yoongi tries to think of something to say.
"So why did you write me that note?" he asks. Jimin smiles wider at the question.
"Well you were clearly being too stubborn to accept my apology drink and honestly, it looked like you could do with some company-"
"I'm fine being alone," Yoongi interrupts, a touch too aggressive.
Jimin seems to realise he's hit a nerve and his smile falters a little. "Yeah, okay. Sure. I guess maybe I wanted some company myself," he says, voice a bit softer.
There's another silence and they both take gulps of their drinks. They watch the people walking past, tourists laden with their cameras and souvenirs, and casually dressed locals heading out for the evening.
"I'm sorry again," Jimin says, "for hitting you in the face."
"It's fine," Yoongi says, even though it isn't really.
Jimin stands up a little and leans over the table. He brushes back some strands of Yoongi's hair that have fallen over his temple. Yoongi jerks his head back at the touch. This guy really needs to learn about boundaries.
"Well I haven't given you a scar at least," Jimin states after his inspection. "Though that might have been cool. Mysterious Yoongi with the scar."
"I'm good with just being Yoongi," he declares.
"Seriously though. Sorry about that."
"It's fine," Yoongi repeats. "I just don't get why people feel the need to take so many photos of themselves."
Jimin shrugs and looks down at his wine glass.
"I dunno. I just take stupid ones to send to my friend Hobi. He's been pretty down lately cos of- well, some family stuff. I'm just trying to cheer him up."
Oh great. Now Yoongi feels like a grade A dick. The smile has even dropped from Jimin's face, the corners of his mouth turning down slightly, and Yoongi can't help but think that his face suits a smile much more.
"I keep wondering if I should have stayed there, been around more for him. But he refused to let me stay for him when I'd had this trip planned for so long."
Yoongi doesn't know what to do. He's somehow made the world's smiliest man look miserable. Great work. He's no good at comforting words, so just says,
"Kind of sounds like what my friend Namjoon told me when I wasn't sure about coming here."
Jimin looks up at this, intrigued. "Mysterious Yoongi has friends?" There's the trace of a smirk on his lips..
"It's been known to happen."
"So why were you thinking of not coming?" Jimin asks.
"It's a l-"
"A long story," Jimin finishes for him. "Yes, you did say. But we do have all evening."
"Maybe another time," Yoongi answers. He's not ready to talk about his heartache with anyone, least of all with someone he's just met. Jimin nods, seeming to accept his answer.
"Another drink?" he asks.
Yoongi considers for a moment. This is his chance to leave, to escape from the night. But he finds that, actually, he doesn't particularly want to right now. It's not the easiest of conversations, not like the casual exchange of thoughts that flow back and forth between himself and Namjoon, but he supposes that it is nice just to have someone else's presence around for a little while.
It's the first of many drinks. The vodka helps loosen Yoongi up a bit. Helps make that photo of Yujin and his new boyfriend become a lot hazier in his mind.
Jimin is, admittedly, not bad company. He does most of the talking for which Yoongi is grateful. He talks about his life in Seoul, about his dancing, of which he is very passionate. He reminisces about growing up in Busan and from the way he speaks it's clear that he misses it. Yoongi lets him know a little about himself too; he talks about his extremely dull office job that he quit to travel, that he enjoys underground rap and how he really would like a job working in the music industry one day.
Their speech gets somewhat louder with the more that they drink and Jimin sometimes gains disapproving stares from other patrons when he laughs so brightly, which he does often. He even gets Yoongi smiling from time to time with his tales from home. He seems to have a good group of friends in Seoul and the way that Jimin tells stories so vividly means that Yoongi almost feels like he knows this Hobi, Tae and Kook despite never having met them. He's younger than Yoongi but seems so much more at ease with himself; Yoongi's almost a little jealous.
"So, do you have a girlfriend waiting for you back in Daegu?" Jimin asks after they order another round. Yoongi's starting to lose count of what number drink he is on now.
"No, no girlfriend," Yoongi smiles.
"Boyfriend?" Jimin continues.
Yoongi's smile drops. "No," he says quietly. "Well, not anymore."
Jimin realises quickly that he's said the wrong thing. "Shit. Moving on," he laughs, embarrassed.
"How about you?" Yoongi asks, trying to deflect the attention away from himself. "Anyone waiting for you back home?"
"Nah, I'm single," Jimin says. "It's not fair to share all of this beauty with just one person." His hand sweeps down his body as he shimmies a little and Yoongi snorts derisively.
Jimin's face softens slightly though his eyes still sparkle. "I'm not averse to having a boyfriend. But until the right person comes along, I'm fine being on my own."
Yoongi considers this before nodding his approval. "It's good that you're like that," he admits. "I must say it was quite refreshing to see you having fun on your own in the middle of all those couples at the Eiffel Tower."
Jimin's eyes narrow, staring at Yoongi. His index finger runs along the rim of his glass, having switched to vodka tonics too a round or two ago. "At the Eiffel Tower, huh?"
"Yeah, you were doing all those stupid poses," Yoongi prompts, not sure why Jimin's now smirking at him.
"Yoongi, are you my stalker?" he asks teasingly through smirking lips.
Yoongi blinks a few times in confusion before it suddenly hits him that in Jimin's timeline they hadn't been aware of each other until the selca stick collision at the Louvre. He feels a heat rising rapidly in his cheeks, Jimin's smirk deepening.
"Look it was impossible to avoid spotting you there, bending into all those ridiculous poses," he exclaims, rapidly trying to explain away his comment. He realises now that Jimin must have been trying to take some amusing shots to send to this Hobi guy back home.
"Yes, I'm very flexible," Jimin says lowly. "Glad you noticed."
It doesn't do anything to calm the heat flushing Yoongi's cheeks and he can't help but think that the simmering, focused look that flutters across Jimin's features suits his face just as much as a smile.
"Um," Yoongi says uselessly.
Jimin laughs again and the seductive look vanishes just as quickly as it appeared.
"So how do you feel about maybe hitting a club or something?" Jimin asks with an eager grin.
Yoongi glances down at his watch, surprised by the late hour. He hadn't realised that so much time has passed. It seems that the drink and, yes okay, perhaps the company too, has been doing the trick of taking his mind off of his hopeless situation. He looks at Jimin, who's looking back expectantly. The thought of the sad, empty bed that awaits him in the dingy hotel room filters into Yoongi's mind.
Jimin's grin grows wider and Yoongi wonders how that is even possible.
They settle the bill. Yoongi is momentarily concerned for his daily budget when he sees the total, but it doesn't deter him from continuing onto the club afterwards. Jimin seems to know where he's going so Yoongi lets him lead the way. He's rather excited by the prospect of the club, bouncing on his feet and continually prompting Yoongi to hurry up. Yoongi wanders behind him, watching as Jimin accidentally bumps into a passing couple. He tries to apologise in French this time and it's quite awkward to watch his attempts. Though maybe a touch endearing too.
Yoongi could do with a cigarette.
He lights up and inhales, the smoke mixing in with the taste of alcohol sitting on his tongue. It's a bitter tang but it reminds him that at least he's out, he's doing something, not just sitting in his room moping and pining.
Jimin suddenly reappears next to him, eyes focused on the cigarette between Yoongi's lips.
"Yeah. You want one?" Yoongi offers, holding out the packet.
"Um, no. I'd rather not taste like an ashtray thanks."
Yoongi shrugs and shoves the packet back into the pocket of his jeans. He feels Jimin's gaze still on him and he looks up to meet it, blowing out a slow stream of smoke as he does so.
Jimin shrugs this time. "Yeah. Keep going with those and no one's gonna want to kiss you tonight."
Yoongi's stomach dips unexpectedly at his words. "Maybe I don't want anyone kissing me tonight."
Jimin smirks at him, and that darker look from earlier flickers in his eyes again for the briefest of moments.
"Hmm. We'll see about that."
Yoongi's stomach does the strange dip again and he watches wordlessly as Jimin bounds off once more, calling out encouragement to hurry up from over his shoulder. Yoongi's struck by hesitation. Is Jimin hitting on him? Yoongi's normally fairly oblivious to such things but he has the distinct feeling that Jimin just might be. He looks at the other man, studying him. To be honest, Jimin seems like such an open, friendly person that it could all simply be part of his persona. Yoongi doesn't really know him well enough to judge properly.
"Hey, move it!" Jimin calls from down the street. Yoongi stands still for a while longer until he feels his feet start walking him in Jimin's direction.
When they get there the club is noisy and hot, packed everywhere with people dancing to the loud hiphop tunes that blare from the speakers. Jimin's eyeing the dance floor excitedly and Yoongi's eyeing it warily. Dancing isn't really his forte. Him and Namjoon sometimes go out clubbing in Daegu with a few of their acquaintances but they normally prefer to stand on the sidelines, attempting to look cool. If they do manage to be dragged onto the dance floor there normally has to be a lot of alcohol consumption involved. Well, at least that aspect's covered tonight.
Yoongi mimes a drink to Jimin who nods eagerly. He keeps looking over at the dance floor however so Yoongi leans in, having to put his mouth right by the younger's ear to be heard over the noise.
"I'll get them and meet you out there," he says, tipping his head in the direction of the crowd. Jimin grins and gives him a thumbs up and Yoongi heads to the bar.
He stands in line waiting to get served, looking around the club. It's a pretty cool place, industrial in aesthetic with low lighting. The bar is busy but the line moves quickly. Yoongi decides to go for shots, reasoning that the club is too crowded to hold onto anything bigger. In reality he just wants a drink that will keep the distracting fuzziness in his brain going for as long as possible with minimal effort. He orders three shots once he gets served, downing one at the bar for himself before searching out Jimin with the other two.
There are so many people it takes Yoongi a while to locate Jimin. When he does he stops in his tracks, unable to move or take his eyes off of him. Jimin's dancing on his own, but it's not awkward like Yoongi's dancing or silly like Namjoon's. It's fluid and rhythmic, his hips rolling effortlessly in time with the music. It's clear that he's a dancer in the way he moves, but Yoongi thinks that even with all the dance training in the world he wouldn't be able to move quite so hypnotically as Jimin.
His dancing is catching the attention of a few people around him and fairly soon he's joined by another guy. The newcomer does his best but he's not quite at Jimin's level. Jimin doesn't seem to mind though, smiling as they dance together and seeming to be thoroughly enjoying himself. Yoongi just stands there dumbly, a shot in either hand. Should he go? They seem to be getting on pretty well - perhaps he should just leave them to it.
He's trying to make a decision when Jimin suddenly spots him, near enough shoving the other guy aside to wave wildly at Yoongi. The other guy looks quite pissed off, understandably so Yoongi thinks, and starts yelling something at Jimin. Yoongi suddenly notices how much taller this man is than the both of them.
"Sorry, I'm here with my friend," Jimin shouts over the music.
Yoongi thinks friend might be pushing it as they've only met today, but he's more focused on the fact that Jimin keeps motioning wildly towards him. He wishes he wouldn't given that the guy is looking angrier by the second. He clearly doesn't understand Korean and shouts something back in a language that Yoongi doesn't recognise. Jimin shrugs cutely in response, face apologetic. Eventually the man decides he's getting nowhere with this and stalks off. Yoongi stumbles forward and doesn't say anything, just holds out the shot for Jimin. They clink together the glasses before both downing the contents.
"Gross," Jimin grins, face screwing up at the taste.
Yoongi places the empty glasses on a nearby table before feeling a tug on his shirt and Jimin's then pulling him over to dance. He puts his hands on Yoongi's waist and god, he's really way too close right now. Yoongi's arms remain resolutely by his sides.
"I'm really not a good dancer," he says loudly into Jimin's ear.
"Doesn't matter," Jimin smiles.
It does kind of matter though, Yoongi thinks, as he stands there awkwardly. He's pretty sure he can feel the glare of the guy from before standing at the sidelines, clearly wondering why Jimin's picked this loser over him. Jimin's now just sort of dancing at him and Yoongi is trying to look anywhere but at the writhing man in front of him. Jimin sighs.
"More shots?" he asks. Yoongi nods enthusiastically.
At the bar they get through not one but two more shots each, and Yoongi's feeling distinctly drunk. Once they get past the burning in their throats Jimin's grabbing onto the fabric of Yoongi's shirt and clumsily dragging him away from the bar.
"Look, I said I can't-"
Yoongi's protests are cut off with a roll of Jimin's eyes. Jimin leads him not to the main dance floor but nearer to the wall. It's darker here, slightly less crowded and not so out in the open.
"You need to loosen up a bit," Jimin states, mouth pressed to Yoongi's ear to be heard. His breath is hot against it.
"I'm trying!" Yoongi exclaims, before pointlessly adding, "I'm drunk!"
Jimin laughs and nods. "Yeah, I think we both are. Look, no one's going to care if you're not the best dancer. I certainly won't."
His hands find their way to Yoongi's waist again. Damn, he's really not going to give up. Yoongi sighs pointedly and puts his hands on Jimin's shoulders. Jimin's face lights up in excitement. He starts moving and Yoongi attempts to sway along, trying desperately not to think of how stupid he must look right now. Yujin always knew that Yoongi wasn't a fan of dancing so used to leave him be; he was always perfectly happy going off to clubs on his own to spare Yoongi the torture.
Yoongi scrunches his face up a little as he thinks. Was that the case, or - a horrible dread flows through him - was he going to clubs to meet other people? Is that where he met this new guy? He shakes his head. No, no, he's not meant to be thinking about Yujin. He forces himself to focus on the present, which unfortunately for him is Jimin bringing their bodies a bit closer.
"See, you're not that bad," Jimin leans in to say, though when he pulls back Yoongi's pretty sure that he's trying to hold back a grin.
Yoongi keeps trying to stay in time with the beat of the song but he's not entirely sure he's successful. Jimin genuinely doesn't seem to mind though and when Yoongi offers him an embarrassed smile he receives a beaming one back. The song finishes and, as with every song, he hopes it is the last one. Sadly that doesn't seem to be the case.
"This is one of my favourites," Jimin shouts and Yoongi groans inwardly.
He's definitely got no chance of escaping now. Quite the opposite in fact, as Jimin seems to be pressing even closer. He can actually feel Jimin's hips against his own as they dance. Shit. The song's a slower one, some sort of pulsing R&B, and Yoongi's not quite sure what's going on now. He feels like the mood has shifted significantly with the song change. His stomach flutters nervously and he forces himself to look up to meet Jimin's gaze. He immediately wishes that he hadn't.
Jimin's looking at him hungrily, eyelids hooded and framing eyes that have become much more intense. His wide smile has tightened into a knowing smirk. That fucking smirk. Yoongi's head is spinning. This is really not where he envisaged the night going; he didn't even think he'd make it past one drink, let alone to wherever...this seems to be.
The buzz of the club thrums through his body. Yoongi feels lightheaded. Jimin's eyes. Jimin's smirk. The way his hips roll against Yoongi's. He's not sure what exactly makes him do it but when Jimin leans in and presses his lips to Yoongi's, Yoongi kisses back without thinking.
It doesn't remain a chaste press of the lips for long. Within seconds Jimin's tongue is licking against his lips and Yoongi parts his mouth eagerly, letting Jimin's tongue slip inside. The kiss is hot and needy, tongues rolling wetly against each other. Yoongi's arms move from Jimin's shoulders to around his neck, one hand lifting to tangle in Jimin's dark locks. Yoongi feels rather than hears a small moan of pleasure from the other man and Jimin's hands on his hips grip harder, pulling their bodies tighter together.
The kiss deepens, a desperate glide of tongues, and Yoongi's completely lost in it. They kiss greedily, wanting more and more of each other. It's still not enough. They've stopped dancing now, completely wrapped up in the kiss, in being totally pressed up against each other. Jimin bites at his lip and Yoongi sucks on his tongue and fuck, fuck, it's all too much.
Yoongi feels dizzy. He can taste the alcohol on Jimin, feel the heat of his hands that now slip just under Yoongi's shirt. He hasn't kissed anyone but Yujin for the last three years and the newness of it is suddenly hitting him. He feels the hot burn of alcohol stinging his throat, the smoke from his cigarette earlier; the beat of the music is thumping in his head and he's too hot, too drunk. A full wave of nausea hits him.
He jerks back, breaking the kiss. He only has a moment to register the look of confusion on Jimin's face before he turns and runs, pushing aside people in the crowd to reach the door. Shit, shit, shit. He finally bursts out of the door into the cool night air, only making it a few steps before he promptly vomits in the street.
Yoongi's hands are on his thighs as he bends over, his face hot and sweaty. God, what an absolute mess. He knows he's been hitting the drink hard tonight but still, this is incredibly embarrassing. He hasn't thrown up from drinking in a long time. Everything hits him at once; his heartbreak, his messed up situation, and the fact that he feels guilty, fucking guilty for kissing someone else. How pathetic can you get?
He waits a few moments but it seems like there's nothing more coming up. Yoongi takes a deep breath before straightening up, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. He feels so pitiful right now. He looks across the street and notices a few people giving him disgusted looks. He runs his clean hand through his hair.
"Is my kissing really that bad?"
Yoongi spins round at the voice. Jimin's standing there, arms folded across his chest. He has an eyebrow raised, a teasing smile on his face.
"I think I drank too much," Yoongi says, another stupid statement that he seems to be coming out with far too frequently this evening.
"You don't say," Jimin laughs. "Come on." He slings an arm around Yoongi's shoulders, leading him away from the club.
"My hotel's in the other direction," Yoongi mumbles but Jimin doesn't pay him any attention. He just keeps on walking and Yoongi follows.
Yoongi stirs from his sleep, blinking against the morning light that is being ineffectively dimmed by thin curtains. He turns onto his side and immediately regrets it. His head is throbbing and the movement causes a flurry of nausea to course through him. He closes his eyes again, trying to bring on darkness and more sleep, but the room is much too bright.
He opens his eyes and it takes a little while to realise that, shabby as the room is, it's unfamiliar and definitely not his hotel. Last night suddenly comes flooding back to him; the drinking, the dancing, oh fuck, the kissing. He lifts his head very slowly and looks around the room, and then he sees him.
Jimin's curled up in a chair that's much too small, legs dangling over the side and a rolled up sweater being used as a pillow. Has he slept there all night? Yoongi sinks back into the mattress. He's sweltering, still fully dressed from yesterday. The room is stuffy, the smell of sweat and alcohol hanging heavy in the air. Yoongi tentatively sits up and groans quietly. Moving is a bitch.
He inches to his feet, stumbling over to the window. He tries very carefully to open it without making a noise. It's an old window and it's not budging. Yoongi tries again with a bit more force but unfortunately it's slightly too much. It slides open with a loud bang. He sighs.
"You trying to escape through the window?" comes a sleepy voice from behind him.
Yoongi turns around to see Jimin watching him with one eye open. He looks exhausted but still has a playful expression on his face.
"Just needed some fresh air," Yoongi explains. He sits down on the end of the bed before adding, "I'm dying."
Jimin chuckles, his voice still thick with sleep, and Yoongi definitely does not have a thought that it's an attractive sound.
"Yeah. Pretty crazy night." Jimin stretches as he speaks, arms over his head and feet out in front of him. Yoongi looks down at the floor.
"Yeah, uh, sorry about the vomiting."
"Don't worry about it," Jimin reassures him. "It was pretty funny. Y'know, once I realised it wasn't my kissing that caused it."
Yoongi groans at the memory of the kiss. He can't believe that they did that. He also can't believe that a part of him was enjoying it. It seems wrong somehow. Jimin eyes him mirthfully, eyes sparkling even in their tired daze.
"Yeah, you did keep apologising profusely for it when I was trying to make you go to bed," Jimin recalls, and Yoongi's not sure if he means the kiss or the vomit. He doesn't ask.
"Did you sleep there all night?" Yoongi questions him.
"I thought you were in greater need of the bed," Jimin says simply. Yoongi feels bad and rather embarrassed; he can't believe Jimin's spent all night cramped up in that tiny chair while he's been sprawled like a starfish on the mattress.
"That's really- thanks," Yoongi offers.
Jimin shrugs. "Sure you'd do the same." A silence settles over the room before Jimin eventually speaks again. "Let's go get a coffee shall we."
It's more of a statement than a question. Yoongi balks. It was a big enough decision for him to spend the evening with Jimin instead of his usual solitude yesterday. That's all it is meant to have been - one night out with some company, a handy distraction to take his mind off of the constant dwelling on his old relationship and that fucking photograph.
Just because it happened to get a bit more distracting than planned doesn't mean that he needs any more time in Jimin's company. Anyone's company for that matter. It was quite sweet - and slightly weird - that Jimin referred to Yoongi as his friend last night but come on, they are pretty much strangers. Sure, he'd possibly had a better time last night than he'd care to admit, and more enjoyable than nights he's had back home with acquaintances he's known for years, but still. Spending the morning together - that's just a bit much.
If Yoongi thought the idea of spending the morning together was a bit much, then he has no fucking clue how it's now early afternoon and they're lazing in a park together like it's a totally normal thing to do with someone you've just met.
Breakfast managed to perk Yoongi up a bit, the elder refusing a pastry initially until Jimin bought a whole selection and he then proceeded to wolf down more than his share. As much as the hit of sugar and coffee made him feel a bit more alive, Yoongi on the whole still feels terrible. Therefore Jimin has decided that today will be what he's termed an 'obligatory chill day' and it seems that the implication is that chill day is a shared day. Yoongi's decided that he doesn't have the energy to argue the point too much, especially when this spot in the cool shade is just so perfect.
They don't really chat much, just doze on and off, occasionally checking their phones. The most exciting moment is when a leaf falls on Jimin's face and he immediately flings himself to standing, terrified that it's a huge insect. That amuses Yoongi. Other than that they spend their time in comfortable quiet which is just how Yoongi likes things.
"Hey, so I know it's really annoying when people do this-" Jimin starts to ask tentatively. Yoongi raises an eyebrow, unsure of what he's about to say. "But I'm meant to have a call with my friends and, well, would it bother you if I still take it? We've kind of had to schedule it in to get everyone together at the same time and I don't know when I might catch them next."
Jimin's expression is hopeful and a bit nervous, and Yoongi wonders just how grumpy he's been this morning to make Jimin so worried to ask. He shrugs.
"Fine by me."
Jimin offers him a wide smile in thanks and less than five minutes pass before his phone starts ringing. He doesn't put it to his ear however to answer but holds it up in front of him for a video call. On pressing the answer button he's immediately hit with an excited yell from the other end and Yoongi now realises why he'd asked if it was okay to take the call. Jesus, Yoongi wishes he had some headphones right now to block this out.
"Hey Jiminie," comes a voice from the screen, far too loudly.
"Hey Hobi," Jimin smiles at him. "Good to see you."
Yoongi's ears prick up a little at the familiar name and he recalls that Hobi is the friend Jimin's been sending all the silly photos to. In fact Yoongi's sure he recalls taking a photo of Jimin last night for that very purpose, Jimin tasting the wine with exaggerated poses and trying to look like a connoisseur.
"You too," says the voice he now knows as Hobi. "So, how's Paris? What've you been up to?"
Jimin launches into a near blow by blow account of his first few days in the city and what he's seen so far. Yoongi mainly zones out, closing his eyes and letting Jimin's lilting voice wash over him. Jimin already talked him through a lot of this already; of the sights he's ticked off so far, of the restaurants he's tried, of the group of Australians he ended up drinking with on his first night here despite neither side understanding each other past the fact that they all enjoyed alcohol. He does note that Jimin leaves last night out of his stories and for that he's grateful. Yoongi feels almost like he's ready to drift off to sleep again when suddenly two new voices enter the fray. Wonderful.
Clearly not likely to doze off with this racket Yoongi shifts himself up to sit cross-legged. He grabs one of the water bottles they bought at the store and takes a sip as he hears an array of yelled greetings. Yoongi's not sure whether they think because Jimin's in France they have to shout louder at the screen or something, but god it's giving him a headache. Well, a worse headache at least.
He takes another small sip of water but almost chokes when he hears one of them yell out,
"So have you fucked any French boys yet?"
Yoongi sees that Jimin's cheeks turn a light pink at the comment and he looks rather bashful. "Fuck, you guys are embarrassing," he grins sheepishly, giving a very quick apologetic glance over to Yoongi.
"We'll take that as a yes then," comes the other of the new voices. Jimin rolls his eyes.
"Shut up Tae," Jimin laughs. "There has been none of that."
He seems to be purposefully avoiding looking at Yoongi and Yoongi looks down at the water bottle in his hand. He feels a bit uncomfortable, like he's intruding in their conversation. There's quiet muttering about someone's leg digging into them and Yoongi can imagine that they're all pressed in together back in Seoul to try to get on the screen.
"So what are you up to today?" he hears the voice he knows as Hobi ask, clearly trying to help Jimin escape the interrogation.
"Just chilling in the park," he says.
"Seriously- you've gone all the way to Paris to sit in a park? You know Seoul has parks right?"
By process of elimination Yoongi figures this one must be the guy referred to as Kook in Jimin's stories. He thinks it's probably a tad creepy how he knows so much about these guys despite having never met or seen them, the result of the countless tales told by Jimin last night.
"It's a nice park," Jimin protests weakly.
"Go on then, show us this nice park," Hobi encourages.
Jimin turns his phone so that the camera's facing outwards and slowly shuffles round in a circle to give them a full 360 degree view of the park. Yoongi suddenly realises that he might end up in shot and ducks down, though apparently not fast enough.
"Woah, woah, woah," he hears a voice - Tae's, he thinks - shout from the phone. "Back up."
Jimin turns the phone back round to face himself. "What?"
"Who's the blond?" Tae demands.
"Oh, uh, that's just a friend of mine," he explains, suddenly looking quite shy.
"Sure," drawls Kook's voice, clearly not believing him. "Hey, isn't it strange how the one friend Jimin's made just so happens to be a hot guy," he continues, in a tone of mock bewilderment.
"Why yes, that is weird," says Tae, playing along. Yoongi gets the feeling they may be something of a double act in real life. He also feels like he wants the ground to swallow him up.
"Guys, be nice," Jimin chides, a warning tone in his voice.
Hobi steps in to steer the conversation elsewhere. Yoongi feels like he must be the oldest and, despite all the crazy stories Yoongi's heard about him, he seems to have a slight edge of authority in their group. Yoongi lays back down on the ground, flinging an arm over his face to block out the sun, but also to hide the flush on his cheeks caused by their comments.
They chat for a while about different bits and pieces in their life and the upcoming new semester. There's a lot of dance terms flying around that Yoongi doesn't understand; although often they all end up talking over each other so it's impossible to make much out anyway. Not that he's particularly trying to listen in on their conversation but well- it's hard not to overhear.
Eventually they're all saying their goodbyes and Yoongi pretends that he doesn't hear the bye mystery man that's yelled out by one of them.
Jimin ends the call and scratches at the back of his neck, looking down at the ground before looking over at him.
"Sorry about that," he says awkwardly. "They can be a bit much sometimes."
"It's cool," Yoongi replies, not moving his arm from where it's still flung across his face.
Jimin doesn't say anything immediately and Yoongi wonders if he's looking at him.
"I mean, at least Kook called you hot," he says, and Yoongi doesn't have to look at him to know that he's grinning. "And he has high standards."
Yoongi lets his arm fall behind his neck, using it as a pillow to prop his head up. "And you don't?"
He regrets the comment once he says it; it sounds mildly flirtatious and Yoongi realises that he's also moved into a somewhat come hither position as he says it.
Jimin bites down on his lower lip and Yoongi's stomach gives the tiniest of flutters as his gaze sweeps along Yoongi's body.
"Oh no. I have very high standards," he says, his words slow and measured.
Oh god. Yoongi's not sure what is happening here. He should really leave, go back to exploring the city on his own. He doesn't need anyone else by his side. Especially people who never stop smiling and flirt inappropriately and drag him to stupid nightclubs. He's going to leave, he's going to-
"So do I."
Wait, what? He's not even aware of the words falling from his mouth until they're spoken, lingering in the space between them. Yoongi's totally blaming this on the hangover. It's making him slow; he's not thinking straight.
Jimin's teeth release his lower lip. He's watching Yoongi intensely, that fire in his eyes like last night. Yoongi feels like he's going to melt but he's sure that's just the weather.
"Well," Jimin breathes out and Yoongi's suddenly hanging on his every word. The air seems charged with something that puts Yoongi on edge, though he's not entirely sure if he likes it or not. There's a short pause.
"Good thing we're both so fucking sexy then," Jimin grins before running his hands over his body in an over the top mock display of sexiness.
He looks like a total dork and it makes Yoongi laugh. The weird mood breaks and everything returns to something much more casual and much less electric. Which is a good thing, Yoongi tells himself. He just wishes the flutter in his stomach would get the message.
They soon settle back into their hectic schedule of dozing and chatting languidly every so often. They lazily discuss options for lunch but every suggestion seems like far too much effort. At some point Yoongi feels his phone buzz in his pocket and he takes it out to read the message.
so this happened last night
The next message buzzes through and it's a photo of Namjoon smiling widely. He's next to a man with model good looks who also is smiling brilliantly at the camera. They both look a touch tipsy and it seems like they're in a bar. Yoongi instantly recognises the other man as Seokjin, Namjoon's colleague. Also known to Yoongi as the guy Namjoon has been crushing on for the past year. His phone buzzes again.
bedroom skills A+++
plus a round 2 this morn
Yoongi suppresses a chuckle as he types back a reply.
Seriously TMI. I'm feeling nauseous enough as it is
Despite Namjoon's bragging about the sex, Yoongi knows that deep down he cares a lot for Seokin and, though he'd never admit it outright, he'd be pretty devastated if Seokjin were to see it just as a one time thing. He really hopes that Namjoon doesn't get hurt.
but I'm happy for you Joon
He wishes he could be back in Daegu to tease Namjoon about this and to just be there to hear all about it - though preferably not in too much detail. He's had to deal with enough intricate descriptions of Seokjin's face - he's so handsome, he could totally be in a drama - and his body - his shoulders, hyung, god - to last him a lifetime. He supposes he could put up with it a bit longer if it meant that Namjoon was happy.
He feels a small pang of regret again at coming on this trip, at leaving behind the few people who care for him. And for what? Just to wander around being miserable on his own. Another few messages come through.
he's taking me to some swanky restaurant on Sat
need you here to help with my swag
Yoongi's relieved; at least Seokjin seems to be taking it seriously.
Yoongi's happy for his friend, he really is. But he also feels a slight bitterness, a wave of sadness. Everyone seems to be getting on with their lives. Namjoon, Yujin. And he's just stuck in this perpetual loneliness, going nowhere. He wishes so badly that things weren't like this. He knows he sounds petulant, like a whining child to say that it isn't fair but- well, it isn't. Nothing is fucking fair about this.
Yoongi closes the message without responding, sensing himself edging into his usual reverie of memories and negativity, dwelling on a future that no longer exists. At least it doesn't feel so intensely painful anymore like it did in that first month afterwards; it's now more of a dull ache, a longing for something impossible.
"What the fuck?"
He's snapped out of his thoughts when a splash of water hits him right in the face. He looks up to see Jimin standing there, water bottle in hand, already starting to retreat. He's grinning wide, a mixture of fear and excitement as Yoongi instinctively reaches for his own water and starts advancing on the other man. Jimin immediately turns and runs, laughing as he does so.
"You looked sweaty!" he calls out over his shoulder in explanation. "And way too serious!"
Jimin's fast but Yoongi catches up with him. Water soaks Jimin's thigh as Yoongi thrusts his bottle in Jimin's direction, and Yoongi promptly receives a splash to the back in return, his t shirt clinging damply to the skin. It's stupid and it's childish, but as they run around after each other Yoongi can't stop laughing, the sort of breathless laughter that you just have to give into.
The fight doesn't last for too long given the limited supply of water but they drag it out as long as possible. All kinds of tactics are employed, including one time when Jimin attempts a sideways roll over the grass as though he's in a spy movie. It doesn't prevent him from getting another dousing on his shoulder however, and Yoongi's ankle then comes under attack in retaliation.
Once they've finally run out of water they stand there, out of breath but still laughing. Drips fall from Yoongi's hair, the strands matted to his forehead. Jimin looks down in dismay at his shorts.
"Shit, it looks like I've pissed myself," he says through his laughter, which sets Yoongi off again.
It takes a while for them both to calm down and for Yoongi to eventually ask,
Lunch is a modest affair, two cheese baguettes eaten on a bench overlooking the Seine, accompanied by a can of Coke each. Yoongi sits cross-legged whilst Jimin stretches out his legs, trying to dry his shorts in the sun. He looks a lot fresher and cleaner than Yoongi, having had the opportunity to shower and change his outfit this morning, unlike Yoongi who's still in his clothes from last night. Yoongi knows he's probably not looking his best right now and he tries not to think about the fact that it bothers him a little. He shrugs it off. Anyone would want to look presentable while in public; it's nothing to do with the fact it's Jimin he's with.
They chat lazily. Yoongi decides to share Namjoon's good news given that he's heard so much about Jimin's gang. And you know, just to remind Jimin that he's not completely socially awkward and does in fact have friends back home. Well, one at least. Jimin appears genuinely pleased for Namjoon despite never having met him and it's a tiny bit touching.
They discuss their plans post-Paris. Yoongi has been planning on heading north to Amsterdam and Jimin alternatively is travelling south to Spain. Jimin attempts to teach Yoongi some of the Spanish phrases that he's learnt which he insists are all perfectly polite in nature, but from the way the corners of his mouth twist up Yoongi's pretty certain that's not the case. It doesn't really matter - Yoongi's accent's so thick he's not sure any Spaniard would understand him anyway. Yoongi doesn't know any Dutch phrases but he promises to look some up.
After lunch they decide that they should probably get back on the tourist trail. However it's still 'chill day' therefore Jimin declares they have to be 'chill tourists' - so they plump for an easy boat trip down the Seine. They grab a seat on the top deck, sitting at the back. Yoongi takes the seat nearest to the edge and is annoyed when he realises that his camera is still back in his hotel room. Photography hasn't had it's usual pull on him so far this trip, but Yoongi feels like there may be some opportunities coming up now.
"Well, isn't this romantic," Jimin says as the boat fills up with people. He slings his arm around Yoongi's shoulders in an exaggerated motion, grinning at the mortified expression on Yoongi's face.
"Fuck off," Yoongi mutters, but it's said without any real malice.
He's beginning to get used to the way Jimin messes around and is starting to feel more comfortable with it. It's just a tad unnerving, the way Jimin acts as though they've known each other for years rather than only meeting yesterday. He shrugs off Jimin's arm and the other man laughs. His arm however only drops to the back of Yoongi's chair and Yoongi's not sure why on earth that makes that strange flutter reappear in his stomach. He must be seasick already; this water is a little choppy after all.
Yoongi picks up the headphones and pops them over his ears, flicking through the channels before eventually finding the Korean station. The commentary starts up, a soft, soothing woman's voice talking about the history of the city and giving information on the various monuments they're passing. Yoongi watches the buildings pass by them slowly, all very ancient, very grand. It's such a contrast to the way Daegu looks.
There's a light breeze from the river that flutters through his hair as the boat cruises gently down the river. The sun's beating down, warm and lulling, the low murmur of the commentary only adding to the soporific effect. Yoongi takes just a moment to close his eyes.
Yoongi feels a sharp poke in his side and his eyes shoot open as he bats the hand away. He looks blearily over at Jimin, momentarily unsure of why it feels like they're moving. Jimin tugs Yoongi's headphones down so they hang around his neck.
"You're ridiculous," he says, shaking his head.
"Leave me alone," Yoongi protests weakly, the fact he's just woken up rendering his insult-making ability useless.
"Is this the secret reason why you're here?" Jimin asks. "You're writing a guide book of the 100 best places to nap in Paris?"
"No, I'm writing a book called 'Don't Go for Drinks with Weird Strangers'," he retorts. "It's autobiographical."
Jimin laughs warmly, and it's kind of a nice feeling to be able to make him do so. Yoongi tries to ignore the fact that Jimin's arm still seems to be draped over the back of his seat. Yoongi pops the headphones back on and makes a point of staring avidly out at the sights as they float past them. He senses Jimin continuing to watch him for a while before he puts his headphones back on too.
It's late afternoon by the time that they disembark the boat. They stand by the riverside, looking at each other a bit awkwardly once they realise that they have nothing more planned for the day. Jimin runs a hand through his hair, flattening down the dark strands that have become a bit fuzzy in the heat and the breeze from the river. The fluffy strands make him look young, even softer somehow.
"So I was thinking-" Jimin begins but Yoongi starts speaking at the same time.
"I think I'm gonna head back now," he says, their sentences clashing horribly.
"Oh," Jimin says, blinking a few times once he processes Yoongi's words. "Oh, okay. Sure."
His voice turns rather downcast and Yoongi wishes that it didn't make his chest constrict so tightly, almost painful from the way it causes Jimin's usual upbeat tone to disappear. He sounds strange without it.
"It's, uh, been a fun day," Yoongi tells him.
"Yeah," Jimin replies, a little distractedly. "Well, if you don't have any dinner plans tonight-"
"I think I'm just going to hang out in my hotel tonight," Yoongi interrupts before Jimin can make an offer. Jimin nods and doesn't meet his gaze. "You know. Chill day," Yoongi continues lightly, offering a smile at the shared joke. Jimin smiles halfheartedly in return, and it doesn't meet his eyes. It looks odd on him.
"Well, do you wanna take my number?" Jimin asks. "You know, in case you change your mind?"
Yoongi agrees just as a way to try and stop Jimin looking quite so sad. He hands Jimin his phone, unlocking the screen so that the other man can enter his number into the contacts. Yoongi's background photo is a black and white scene of a leafless tree in winter. He suddenly feels very ridiculous and pretentious. He caught a glimpse of Jimin's phone background earlier; it's of him and some unknown man - he assumes one of the guys from earlier - attempting a kind of leapfrog game. It feels much more personal and open. A bit like Jimin really.
"Well, maybe see you around I guess," Jimin says, offering a small wave in parting.
"Yeah. Nice meeting you" Yoongi says.
And with that they part ways, walking away in opposite directions.
It's for the best, really, Yoongi thinks. Last night and today; it had all become too much. He went on this trip to prove that he's fine, to get on with his life alone. To prove that he doesn't need to depend on anyone else. Yes sometimes things got to him a bit - things like that photo last night. It was good to have the company to help distract him, but he needs to learn to get through this on his own. Clearly having attachments to other people is just a recipe for future pain.
The loneliness seeps into him again, inching into every part of him. His chest feels empty, a cavity aching to be filled with something other than this terrible sadness. He wants to call Namjoon, to just chat about random shit like they always do back home, but it's far too late in Daegu and Yoongi really doesn't want to deal with a pissed off Namjoon down the phone line.
God, why the fuck is he here?
Yoongi brings up a travel website on his phone and enters in tomorrow's date. He searches for the cost of a flight from Paris to Seoul, but chucks the phone down on the bed before the results come up. He can't go back. His life's enough of a mess already.
He now has no job since he quit it to travel; no plans to look forward to. Yujin was always hesitant about defining anything in their future, but Yoongi was always so sure that it would be spent together. Looking back, he knows he's been a huge fool. Going back home and giving up on what was meant to be the trip of his dreams - it's just too depressing to contemplate. Even if he's miserable here, at least he's doing something.
And he wasn't miserable today, a small part of him protests. Nor last night. He tries to ignore it. Just like he tries to ignore the fact that he's actually missing Jimin's presence, his absence hanging over him, obvious and pressing. It's fucking ridiculous. He's not even known the guy 24 hours, there's no way he can be missing him. And yet-
Yoongi rolls onto his side, staring blankly out of the window. Yoongi grabs a cigarette and lights up, trying not to recall Jimin's comments on his smoking from last night. He props himself up on one elbow, not bothering to hang his head out of the window this time. From the stale smell that lingers in the room he's sure he's not the first person to ignore the NO SMOKING signs in here.
It's only the darkening sky outside the dusty window that alerts Yoongi to just how long he's been laying here, drowning in his own painful thoughts. He watches the smoke rise in front of him as he exhales slowly, listlessly. He feels angry at himself. It's only because of Yujin that he has this stupid habit. He flicks the ash into a glass on the bedside table. He watches the smoke a little longer before he gets fed up and stubs out the cigarette unfinished.
He fishes out his iPod amongst his belongings that are scattered around the room and finds an album by one of his favourite rappers, putting his headphones on. The beat starts, sharp lyrics being spit into his ears. It relaxes him a little despite the aggression in the songs. He's not really focusing on the words as he stares up at the ceiling, simply lets the driving rhythm take over his thoughts. He closes his eyes.
The next thing Yoongi knows he's opening his eyes in a pitch black room. The music has stopped. He pulls off his headphones and looks over at the clock. It's only just gone midnight.
His stomach rumbles angrily, reminding him that he's had no dinner tonight. He tries to ignore it as long as possible, remaining motionless on top of the bedcovers. Eventually he gives in. He needs something different to look at other than this godforsaken room and a walk will do that at least. He quickly jumps in the shower and changes. He's been in these clothes far too long now. His outfit however is yet another pair of black jeans albeit with a different top. Namjoon's right, he does really own too many of these things.
Yoongi wanders the streets around his hotel but it's a pretty seedy area so he keeps on walking, feet pounding against the concrete as he passes adult stores and all night convenience marts. Despite the late hour the streets are bustling, people spilling out of bars and restaurants onto the pavement. Everywhere looks too busy, too full of people enjoying themselves. There's laughter and happy chatter all around him and his mood worsens. That is until he keeps on walking and eventually stumbles across a McDonalds. That's when his mood hits a real low. God, can it get any more depressing.
He orders a burger and fries, ignoring the drunken group of girls and the shifty looking teenagers that wait in line with him. Finally he slumps down in one of the booths, sad little meal placed in front of him. Yoongi picks at the food but despite his growling stomach he realises that he doesn't have much of an appetite. The lights are too bright in here and it hurts his eyes after wandering the darker streets for so long.
As he sits there in his lonely booth, Yoongi realises just how much he had enjoyed Jimin's company today. He was warm and funny and open, and didn't ask for much from Yoongi in return. He didn't push him, just led the way and let Yoongi follow, allowing the elder to finally experience a low thrum of actual enjoyment that's he's not had yet on this trip. Jimin had been kind and pleasant and Yoongi didn't just put up with him; he actually sort of liked spending time with him. Yoongi feels a fresh wave of shame at how he left things earlier.
He takes his phone out of his pocket and scrolls through the directory until he finds the new entry of Jimin. He hesitates, finger hovering over the message button, until eventually he takes a deep breath and types out a quick message. He presses send before he can convince himself not to.
You still up?
He doesn't expect to get a response but his phone surprisingly buzzes within a few minutes.
who is this?
Yoongi waits at least a minute for the next message to come through. He wonders for a moment if Jimin might simply choose to ignore him. Yoongi wouldn't blame him to be honest. Yoongi's almost become resigned to the fact when his phone buzzes again, startling him.
yeah. I'm still up. why?
I'm in mcdonalds
It's not really an explanation but Yoongi feels it's a depressing enough location to make the point that he quite needs Jimin's company right now.
there's like 100 mcdonalds here. which one?
Yoongi screenshots his location on a map and sends it through. Thank god his mom made him take out that data plan before he travelled, worried as she was that without access to the net Yoongi would be utterly lost. Yoongi feels a warm surge of relief when he sees the response come through not long after.
see you shortly
Yoongi picks at his fries which are slowly going cold, though he's not totally sure they were that hot to begin with. The burger looks distinctly unappealing and he doesn't bother with it. He remembers some of the restaurants he'd circled in his guide book, all full of gourmet food and foreign delicacies to be shared across a table. New tastes to savour and exciting new dishes to discover, nights that he and Yujin could have looked back on fondly in the future. And here he is on his own in a McDonalds with the most depressing Big Mac he's ever seen. Yoongi allows himself a wry smile at the contrast.
"Who the fuck comes to Paris and eats McDonalds?"
He hears Jimin before he sees him. Yoongi looks up, fry held halfway to his mouth, frozen as he takes in the image before him. Jimin looks good. Jesus, he looks really good. Did he look this good last night?
In comparison to the previous evening Jimin is definitely dressed like he's out to attract a certain kind of attention. He's wearing a white v neck t-shirt, sitting loose on his shoulders in order to expose his collarbone but somehow still fitted enough to highlight his trim waist. It's tucked into dark grey skinny jeans that cling to firm thighs and the look is finished with some black boots. A long necklace hangs down over his chest and Jimin's brown eyes are highlighted with dark eyeliner. Yoongi feels distinctly under-dressed in his jeans, band t shirt and sneakers.
"It's a French fry?" Yoongi offers pathetically.
The corners of Jimin's lips twitch at his lame joke, but he doesn't let it turn into a smile. He sinks into the seat opposite Yoongi and takes a fry. His cheeks are a little rosy, as though he's had a few drinks.
"So," he says, popping the fry in his mouth. He doesn't continue and he allows the uncomfortable silence to linger until Yoongi gives into the need to break it.
"Yeah, uh, thanks for coming," Yoongi says. Jimin raises an eyebrow.
"Well, you're in a McDonalds on your own at 1am. Clearly something's up."
Yoongi really doesn't like how his voice sounds. The usual lightness is absent, the playfulness no longer there. Jimin keeps watching him and it's certainly not helping Yoongi to form the right words. What can he say - he misses him? He can't say that, that's fucking weird. And he doesn't miss him. It's just that he had a nicer time when Jimin was around, even if it was just for a few hours.
"I'm sorry for not going to dinner with you," is what eventually comes out.
Yoongi doesn't really know why the hell he's apologising. He barely knows the guy; he's not obliged to do anything with him. But the way he did it, the way he snubbed Jimin's offer of company - he guesses that's what he's really apologising for. Jimin studies him a while longer.
"You don't have to go for dinner with me," he sighs, his words echoing Yoongi's thoughts. "You just didn't have to be so fucking rude about it. We had a fun day together and then you basically run away from me?" He shakes his head. "Not cool."
"I know," Yoongi says softly, looking down at the table. Jimin doesn't say anything and Yoongi finally glances up. He's just looking at Yoongi. "Have you, uh, been out this evening?"
"Yeah. Just to some bars," Jimin says casually.
Yoongi wonders if he's met any guys tonight - it'd be a surprise if he hasn't, looking like that. Yoongi immediately dismisses the thought. It's not his business. He shouldn't even care and he certainly shouldn't have that mild pang of hurt in his chest.
"I see," Yoongi replies.
Jimin keeps watching him and eventually his expression softens a little.
"Are you okay Yoongi?" he asks, voice laced with concern.
Yoongi wants to tell him that he's not. That he hates being here and yet hates the thought of going home even more. That it's all entirely wrong that he's here alone, and how hard it is to realise that you've lost the ability to be content in your own company. Wants to tell him Jimin how guilty he feels for kissing him and how fucking stupid that is given that his ex is happily with someone else and has been for months. He says none of this, however.
Jimin keeps on staring before sighing and standing up. "Come on."
"Get up, we're going."
Yoongi doesn't ask where, just stands up and follows Jimin out onto the street, leaving behind his barely touched food. They walk in silence, but some of the tension seems to have dissipated. It's not comfortable but it's a little less awkward than before. Yoongi doesn't really know where they're walking to but soon he starts recognising one or two shops and he soon realises that they're heading towards Jimin's hotel.
"Let's get some wine," Jimin says as they pass a small shop.
Yoongi's not particularly in the mood for wine but he doesn't say anything. Jimin seems a lot less annoyed than he was when he first turned up tonight and Yoongi doesn't want to do anything to ruin that.
Once the wine is purchased for the grand total of three Euros - Yoongi's guessing it's probably not a vintage - they wind up back in the same run down hotel room as last night. Yoongi's not quite sure what he's meant to be doing so sits tentatively on the chair once they're in there and Jimin's managed to get the lock on the door to work. There's only one glass in the room so Jimin pours some of the wine in that, handing it to Yoongi before pouring some more into a coffee cup, keeping that for himself.
"I learnt a new phrase tonight," Jimin announces suddenly, a touch more of his usual voice creeping back in. He clinks their wines together and says,
Yoongi echoes him.
"It means like, cheers, but in Italian."
Yoongi wonders who exactly taught him that this evening. He pushes away the thought of a mystery Italian man latching himself onto Jimin and takes a gulp of the wine instead. He instantly grimaces. It's pretty awful stuff. Jimin takes a sip and pulls a similar face.
"Shit," Jimin laughs, and it's a welcome sound. "That's terrible."
He takes another sip however. Yoongi wonders quite how much he's had to drink tonight. Jimin sits down on the end of the bed, facing Yoongi who's still seated on the chair.
"So, Yoongi," he grins, drawing out the words, and yep he's definitely had more than a few drinks. "Mysterious Yoongi."
"Making me sound a bit more exciting than I actually am," Yoongi smiles timidly, enjoying the brightness that seems to be returning to Jimin's voice.
"Hmm, I don't know," Jimin contemplates aloud. "I mean, I still don't know why you're here."
"Oh, it's not important," Yoongi says, his smile faltering a touch. "Just- you know, a vacation."
Jimin eyes him suspiciously. "But then why did your friend have to persuade you to come here?"
Damn, Yoongi didn't think he had paid much attention to the offhand comment he made last night. He doesn't say anything but Jimin fills the gap.
"Oh, can you not tell me? Are you a spy?" he asks in a loud whisper, leaning in conspiratorially.
It's so stupid that Yoongi's smile breaks out again. He shakes his head but then Jimin's guessing again.
"No I've got it. You're an actor on a top secret movie set," he tries, before going straight to, "no, no, you're a hired assassin."
When Yoongi looks blank he goes in with another guess. Then another, and another. It goes from being funny to just reminding Yoongi incessantly of the real, pathetic reason he's here and finally he snaps.
"I was fucking dumped, alright?" he admits, voice much louder than usual. Jimin seems a bit taken aback by the outburst but Yoongi continues. "That's why I don't want to talk about it. I was meant to be here with the love of my life but he fucking dumped me by a fucking text message."
Jimin's eyes widen and he goes to say something but now Yoongi's started he can't seem to stop.
"Three years over just like that," he laughs bitterly, snapping his fingers. "And the worst part is that he left me for someone else. I just wasn't good enough for him." His own words sting as he says them, the truth of them cutting into him deep. He swallows thickly. "Fuck. I just wasn't enough," he says, a bit quieter.
Silence hangs in the room and Yoongi wishes he could take the words back. He's barely spoken with Namjoon about this stuff, let alone a guy he hardly knows. He pushes his hair back from his face. He feels a slight tremble in his lip from the emotions that have just spilled out and he bites down hard on it. He knows that Jimin is staring at him and he purposefully looks down at the floor.
"Yoongi," he says softly, waiting a moment to see if Yoongi responds before continuing. "I'm so sorry. I didn't realise."
"Don't worry about it," he mutters, feeling embarrassed by his outburst. He's normally so good at keeping his feelings in check.
Yoongi's gaze remains on the floor. He doesn't want to look up and see sympathy in those deep brown eyes; he really doesn't need anyone's pity. He hears Jimin taking a deep breath.
"Can I say something?" he asks gently and Yoongi nods curtly. "Your ex sounds like a fucking dick."
Yoongi's head snaps up, his eyes narrowing and locking with Jimin's.
"Don't speak about him like that."
Jimin splutters at Yoongi's word, eyes widening in shock. "Sorry, are you defending this guy?" he asks incredulously.
"It's just- you don't know him," Yoongi protests.
Yoongi knows it's ridiculous but protecting those close to him is something Yoongi does instinctively, apparently even if they've hurt him. And he doesn't like the judgement that comes with Jimin's statement. Like he should have known how cruel Yujin would be, like it's a fault of Yoongi's for even choosing to date him in the first place. He knows deep down that Jimin doesn't think that, but it's how Yoongi feels about himself sometimes. That what's happened is less to do with Yujin and more a reflection of Yoongi's own poor choices.
"I don't need to know him," Jimin replies, laughing in disbelief at Yoongi's statement. "No one should treat another human being like that, I don't care who they are. A fucking text message? God, you deserve better than that Yoongi."
"Don't talk like you know me," Yoongi says snappily.
It's true that Jimin doesn't know him. Shit, yesterday morning they'd never even laid eyes on each other and now Jimin's talking, no arguing, with him like they've known each other for years. Like he knows what's best for Yoongi. And it scares Yoongi that he probably does.
It scares Yoongi too how Jimin has come hurtling into his life like this all of a sudden, settling himself in and making Yoongi question the strange way he feels around the younger. Yoongi knows that none of this is Jimin's fault, it's his own fear at this newness, this unknown territory - and yet here's Jimin, bearing the brunt of Yoongi's own problems once more.
"Yeah well, it seems I know you better in these two days than your beloved ex because I think it's pretty obvious that you deserve more than that," he exclaims, and then, catching himself, he adds quickly, "you know. Anyone would deserve more."
Yoongi's breathing heavily. He feels like he's run the full gamut of emotions in the last 24 hours and it's too fucking much. He presses a hand over his eyes and tries to calm down his breathing. His hand shakes a little and he scrunches his eyes tightly shut. He'd give anything for that simple, straightforward happiness again, the happiness that he had only a few months ago before his whole world seemed to turn upside down. Everything is so fucking complicated now and he feels hopelessly lost.
Yoongi stays like that for a long time, fingers pressed to his forehead. He thinks that Jimin's still on the end of the bed because he's not heard him move, but he has no idea what the other's expression is right now.
Eventually Yoongi drops his hand and opens his eyes. Despite having just yelled at him and been completely unreasonable, Jimin's still looking at him with thinly veiled concern. He doesn't say anything and Yoongi can't think of what to say either. Finally Jimin decides to speak.
"You know what, I've had a lot to drink," he says quietly. "I think I should get some sleep."
Jimin slides onto the bed, shifting up the mattress until he's laid out on top of the covers, still fully dressed. He goes to turn off the light, stopping when Yoongi speaks.
"Should I go?" Yoongi asks him. He feels it would be only fair if Jimin threw him out after the way he's acted today.
"Stay if you want to stay," he murmurs, then switches off the light.
Even with the light off Yoongi can still see, the open curtains allowing light from the adjacent shops and bars to spill into the room. The muffled noise of late night revellers trickles in, the thin glass of the windows doing nothing to block the sound. Yoongi looks over at Jimin and mulls over his statement.
Does he want to stay?
Yoongi considers the question. He doesn't know how this guy has collided - quite literally - into his life so rapidly but today and last night have thrown Yoongi completely off balance. A few days ago he couldn't have imagined enjoying time in the company of someone on this trip other than Yujin; couldn't have imagined opening up to someone new; and certainly never could have imagined that not only would he kiss someone, but that a part of him would kind of enjoy it too.
Jimin's currently laying on his side, back to Yoongi. Despite having just met Yoongi, Jimin has been nothing but open with him, showing him a depth of kindness and care that is startling. And Yoongi repays him with running away, with yelling at him, treating him like he's insignificant.
Yoongi doesn't entirely know what he feels towards Jimin and he's too exhausted, physically and mentally, to explore it any further. He just knows that in that moment he wants to be near to him, to take some comfort from his closeness. Yoongi stands up from the chair, noting how uncomfortable it is and remembering with embarrassment that Jimin slept the whole of last night curled up in it because of him.
Yoongi pads over to the bed and looks down. There's not much space due to it only being a single bed but Yoongi manages to squeeze his body in behind Jimin's, leaving a small gap between them. He's not sure if he should be doing this, but somehow he does feel more content now that they're closer.
Yoongi's almost drifted off to sleep when Jimin turns over to face him. He doesn't say anything, simply slides his arm around Yoongi's waist and pulls him nearer. Yoongi reaches up, sliding his own arm around Jimin's shoulders. Yoongi feels like he wants to cling onto him, onto the feeling of contentment that Jimin seems able to bring to him. Their bodies move to accommodate the new positions of their arms and they end up with limbs entangled, savouring the feeling of closeness. Jimin's face ends up against Yoongi's collarbone, and Yoongi's against Jimin's hair. He never would have thought that holding and being held by someone he hardly knows could bring him such peace, but Yoongi falls asleep feeling more relaxed than he has in a long time.
The next morning Yoongi's the first to wake, taking a few moments to realise where he is. Jimin is snoring very lightly, face still pressed into his collarbone. Yoongi's not sure if they've moved all night. He feels an overwhelming urge to get up and leave because he truly has no idea what's going on here. Yet at the same time he feels like he could stay here all morning, taking comfort from the warmth of the body next to him and the gentle rhythm of Jimin's breathing. He chooses to stay.
Jimin awakes a little while later. Yoongi can tell because of the way his steady breathing changes and how his body tenses ever so slightly when he realises exactly how he's woken up. He doesn't move away however. Instead he just shifts the tiniest bit closer. It makes Yoongi's stomach clench unexpectedly.
When they both eventually wake up fully nothing is said of the heated words from the previous night, nor of the fact that that they've woken up completely wrapped around each other.
Instead Jimin simply asks, "Do you feel like doing something today?" and Yoongi says, "sure", and somehow they make plans meet in front of Anvers Metro station in two hours' time.
It's another hot day but with this time with the added element of the humidity going crazy. Tourists are slumped around the place on benches, clearly struggling in the close weather. While he's hiding out in the shade waiting for Jimin Yoongi spots a stall selling tacky tourist souvenirs. He wanders over and finds the most hideous shirt on the rail, a pink monstrosity with a diamante Eiffel Tower on the front. He holds it out and snaps a picture to send to Namjoon.
is this swag enough for your date?
He's about to put the shirt back on the rail when he hears a voice from behind him.
"I'm sure you can pull off a lot of looks, but I'm gonna have to say no to that one."
Yoongi turns around to see Jimin standing there, arms folded and eyebrows raised. Yoongi quickly returns the item to the rail but in his haste he knocks a few of the other tops to the floor. The stall owner starts yelling something at him. Jimin immediately crouches down to help Yoongi put them back on the rail as quickly as possible.
"I was just taking a photo for Namjoon," Yoongi explains as he hangs up the last shirt.
"Yeah, that's what they all say," smirks Jimin.
Jimin's looking different from last night. The eyeliner has gone as has the outfit that was obviously curated to be deliberately sexy. Today he's wearing shorts and a loose sleeveless top, though Yoongi thinks that he still looks kind of se-
He shakes the thought from his head.
They begin to stroll in the direction of Montmartre, ready to go to the top of the hill to see the Sacre Coeur and wander the cobbled streets that Yoongi's guidebook enthuses so wildly about. As they get nearer Yoongi's about to point out the booth where they can buy their tickets for the funicular to take them to the top. However Jimin chooses that very moment to announce that he's found a nice walking route for them online. Yoongi takes one last longing look at the people boarding the carriage before following Jimin.
In fairness the route is quite pleasant. Well, it would be if Yoongi didn't feel like he's about to melt in the heat. He's so glad he made the decision to drop into H&M to buy himself some shorts en route back to his hotel this morning. After making a firm decision last night to not hop on the first plane back to Seoul, he figures that it makes sense to add some more summer appropriate clothing to his suitcase.
"Ah, let's take a break," Jimin suggests after yet another flight of steps. Yoongi agrees quickly, legs starting to feel a little wobbly.
They take sips from their bottles of water and look out at the view of the city. Yoongi wipes his forehead with the back of his hand before lifting up his water bottle to press it against the warm skin there. It does nothing to help cool him down, the plastic uselessly warm.
"Lightweight," Jimin smirks, though he's looking rather sweaty too.
"Water bottle's warm anyway," Yoongi admits and Jimin smiles.
"Look, you'll appreciate the Sacre Coeur all the more when you get to the top," Jimin explains, though he doesn't look entirely convinced of his own argument.
"I would have appreciated it just as much arriving in air conditioned comfort," Yoongi grins at him, and Jimin shrugs in a slight admission of defeat.
Out of nowhere Yoongi hears a soft meow and looks over to see a small cat sitting on the opposite wall. He watches it a moment before taking hold of his camera and cautiously moving nearer to it. If he positions himself just right he can make it look as though the cat is gazing out serenely over the city scape below them. He crouches down, checking the framing before snapping the photo.
"Wow, so artistic," Jimin teases kindly from the bench.
"Don't be jealous of my art," Yoongi shoots back, unable to hold his serious expression for long.
Their conversation seems to alert the cat to their presence and it jumps down, meowing louder at them. It spots Jimin's hand slipping into his pocket and immediately senses that there may be food on offer. It remains undeterred when Jimin gets out his phone instead of a treat. The cat comes to sit at his feet, looking up at Jimin and meowing again.
"I don't have any food," Jimin tells him as though the cat can understand. The cat meows again. "See, no food," he tries once more, lifting his hands up to show that they're empty.
It looks a little like he's being held hostage by the cat. Yoongi snaps a quick photo of the scene. Jimin glances up at the sound and Yoongi shrugs shyly, turning back to look out at the city view.
The cat follows them some of the way once they continue on their walk, before eventually giving up and stretching out under a shady spot instead. Yoongi feels a little jealous of the feline.
They finally reach the top, the white dome of the Sacre Coeur looming massive above them. Yoongi feels somewhat impressed and starts wandering around with his camera, trying to find the best angle to take a photo from. Jimin does the same only with his phone. He seems to get a bit bored after a while with the amount of pacing that Yoongi's doing to get the perfect shot and he drifts over to sit down on one the steps leading up to the church.
Once Yoongi's taken a couple of pictures that he deems acceptable he ambles down to sit beside Jimin. Jimin is, of course, taking a selca, though Yoongi notes that the stick is gone. Jimin's smiling widely, his fingers in a V shape as he takes the snap. Yoongi looks down at the screen of his camera, flicking through the shots he's taken so far. He feels Jimin shift a bit closer to him, then a bit closer again. He looks up and he sees that Jimin's trying to get him into the photo too.
"Stealth selca," is all he says when he realises he's been spotted.
"Get that out of my face," Yoongi protests, shoving Jimin lightly with his shoulder.
"Oh come on, one photo with me."
"Why do you want me in your photo?" Yoongi asks, trying not to laugh at the pleading expression on the other man's face.
"You know, to remember all the good times. Hitting you in the face, the vomiting in the street, that delicious McDonalds dinner," Jimin laughs. "Gotta treasure those memories."
Yoongi knows that he's joking but the words still cut a little. He's not sure why on earth Jimin wants to spend time with him really; Yoongi feels like he's been nothing but a blight on Jimin's otherwise fun and carefree trip.
"I think those memories are better off deleted," is what Yoongi manages to say. He gets a nudge back against his shoulder in response.
"Ah, come on. Travelling's meant to be all about new experiences. Meeting different people," he reasons. "It's just that you've been a bit more different than the rest. Not in an entirely bad way either," he adds when he sees Yoongi looking rather downbeat.
Jimin smiles at him, honest and warm. Yoongi really doesn't get it; doesn't understand why Jimin would want to waste his time hanging around with someone who's been so gloomy and rude, and has acted so bizarrely. He might have understood if they'd been friends for years and he had to, you know, just put up with his moods like Namjoon sometimes has to. But they've only known each other a few days and they're never going to see each other again after this - it just makes no sense. Yoongi's not one for voicing anything personal, but he has to ask.
"Jimin, why do you want to spend your time here with me? I don't get it."
Jimin looks at him, confusion etched into his features by the strange question. "Well, because I like you," he says simply. "I thought that was obvious."
Yoongi's not sure what exactly he means by like or why he gets that deep twist in his stomach again from Jimin's words
"But- why? You hardly know me."
Jimin laughs a little, still sounding a bit confused. "Well, why does anyone like anyone? You just do sometimes, doesn't matter how long you've known them. You can't really give a reason why."
Yoongi looks down, picking at a thread on his shorts. He knows what Jimin means. He felt that way when he first saw Yujin. He knew straight away that he felt something towards him; knew in an instant really. He glances back up.
"I mean, I'm not entirely sure if you like me," Jimin continues with a slightly smaller smile. "You're a bit confusing."
Yoongi appreciates his straightforwardness, even if it isn't so easy to hear how his actions have affected the other man. Yoongi likes the fact that he's honest; that he doesn't avoid these odd questions.
In fact, Yoongi likes a few things about him so far. He likes the fact that he's so open and doesn't dismiss Yoongi as not worth his time despite having every reason to. He likes that he's happy and kind and thoughtful. Yoongi's felt nothing like the instant attraction he experienced towards Yujin but still there's- something about Jimin that draws Yoongi to him. What that means exactly, Yoongi isn't entirely sure. Yoongi realises that he's not responded to Jimin's comments. He doesn't answer them, instead choosing to ask another question.
"When you say you like me- what exactly do you mean?"
He notices that he's holding his breath a little. He isn't entirely sure what he wants the answer to be. Jimin's lips twitch at the corners, turning his smile into something a bit closer to a smirk.
"Well, I would think the fact that I kissed you the other night might be a big enough clue," he grins. "But I'm cool with just hanging out too. I'm always happy to make a new friend."
Yoongi's face flushes a little, not from the heat this time though. He remembers the kiss the other night, the way Jimin had pulled him close; the way there was a part of him that enjoyed it, that wanted more. Jimin's still looking at him and Yoongi struggles to look away. Eventually Jimin's hand smacks him on the thigh.
"Come on. This heat is killing me."
Jimin's standing up and Yoongi follows him, a bit thrown by the sudden change of conversation. They make their way down one of the side streets that wind away from the Sacre Coeur.
Yoongi's suddenly finding it a bit difficult to focus, his mind going over the conversation they've just had. How he kind of wishes that he'd said more, though he's not particularly sure what he would have said. He just knows that he sort of likes Jimin being around. That's about it. The rest of his mind is too muddled but that, at least, is clear.
They wander aimlessly around the streets of Montmartre, looking in cute shop windows and ignoring the constant calls by the resident artists to have their picture sketched, Jimin always looking intrigued for a touch too long and getting their hopes up.
Eventually the lure of food wins out over their curiousity and they buy a crepe each, retreating onto a bench under the shade to eat. Needless to say, attempting to eat a chocolate crepe on a sweltering day isn't the best idea. The chocolate oozes between their fingers, drizzling down their wrists and Yoongi tries not to watch as Jimin catches a stray dribble of sauce with his tongue.
“This was a terrible idea,” Jimin laughs as a fresh blob of chocolate falls to the ground, narrowly missing the leg of his shorts.
Yoongi takes drastic action and crumples up his crepe, shoving as much as he can into his mouth in one go. His cheeks bulge as he tries to start chewing, the sight apparently comical enough to make Jimin laugh.
“Jeez, you’re a sexy guy,” he teases, still struggling with his own crepe as Yoongi munches his way through the large mouthful.
Another splat of chocolate sauce lands on Jimin’s knee this time. Yoongi wipes his hands on the napkin that came with the crepe before standing up and getting his camera ready. He takes a quick snap of Jimin as he tries to stop his food from melting all over the ground- and himself. It’s an amusing picture that Yoongi can’t resist taking.
“Hey!” Jimin protests. “Why am I not allowed to take photos of you and yet you’ve already taken two of me without my permission?”
Yoongi just shrugs, looking down at the scene he’s captured. He’s happy with the shot and sits back down. He supposes that Jimin’s got a point but well- Jimin’s simply a far more interesting subject matter. Yoongi waits quietly as Jimin continues eating the crepe, determined to finish it despite the mess he’s making. By the time he’s done Jimin has to use the remainder of the water in his bottle to rinse off his hands.
“That was the most painful culinary experience I’ve had in a while,” Jimin chuckles.
Yoongi makes a small noise of agreement and tries not to think about how oddly entrancing it was to watch Jimin lick up the small rivers of chocolate sauce that dripped down his skin.
“So where to next?” Yoongi asks, stunning even himself with the question.
“Well, there was that cool old fashioned carousel we passed earlier-“
“I’m not going on a carousel-“
Jimin sighs loudly, but he doesn’t push it any more. He’s clearly already learnt what battles are worth pursuing with Yoongi and which aren’t. And getting Yoongi on a children’s ride is certainly not one Jimin’s going to win.
"Hmm, can I have a look at the guidebook?" Jimin asks.
It's stupid, he knows it is, but Yoongi feels wary at handing it over. There are many things circled, so many comments scribbled round the edges of pages, that it seems more personal than it should do. Jimin seems to sense his hesitation, as odd as it must seem to him. Who the hell gets touchy over a guidebook?
"Or I'll just look something up on my-"
"No, it's easier to look through this," Yoongi interrupts.
He places his rucksack on the floor and fishes out the well-thumbed guidebook, passing it over to Jimin. Jimin starts flicking through. Yoongi likes using the internet too for interesting things to see, but to him a guidebook makes a place seem somehow more exotic. He's not sure why. Jimin peruses the pages quietly, not commenting on all the obvious pencil marks he must be seeing.
"Have you been to the Notre Dame yet?" Jimin asks.
"I saw it from outside," Yoongi tells him.
"But you didn't go in?"
Yoongi shakes his head. He walked past the cathedral on his first day in Paris but was so disengaged that he didn't make the effort to actually go inside. He didn't even take a photograph of the exterior.
"Oh okay, we've gotta go there then," Jimin decides. "It's awesome inside. Have you ever been in a cathedral before?"
Yoongi shakes his head again. His family aren't particularly religious and any family vacations as a kid were never to places like Europe. They were always to somewhere in Korea, with the exception of a trip to Tokyo once when Yoongi's cousin got some high-flying job in banking. Maybe checking out Notre Dame could be cool.
"Right, we're definitely going."
Jimin flicks to the metro map at the back of the book, figuring out the best way to get there.
"Are you sure?" Yoongi checks. "I mean, you've already seen it."
"I know," Jimin shrugs. "But I want you to see it. I wanna see your reaction - you'll love it, trust me."
Yoongi lets Jimin return to working out a route there. Something small and warm unfurls in Yoongi's chest. All his scribbled notes in the book were places he thought Yujin would like. He'd imagined how Yujin might react, how his face might light up whilst experiencing these things. He realises that not once did Yujin seem to get excited about places that he wanted to show Yoongi.
"Right, I've got it," Jimin eventually says, before standing up. "You ready?"
Yoongi blinks then nods slowly.
"Admit it, I'm a genius."
"You're talking like you made the food yourself."
"Maybe not, but I found us a delicious dinner for less than five Euros. That's a real skill."
"Debatable," Yoongi replies whilst munching his way through his enormous slice of pizza. The cheese is stringy and the base is crispy, and it's pretty damn amazing. Yoongi thinks he'll struggle to find pizza that beats this even in Italy.
Jimin just laughs at his stubbornness and takes another bite of his own slice. They're seated on some rickety chairs down a narrow street, and if it wasn't for all the French accents Yoongi could almost imagine that they were in Italy already. Except, Yoongi realises, he will be very much alone again by the time he gets to Italy. It makes him feel oddly nervous.
"So, what are your plans for tonight?" Jimin eventually asks through his mouthful of pizza.
"Oh, um-" Yoongi begins.
In all honesty he'd kind of assumed that he'd spend the rest of the evening with Jimin. Though maybe he shouldn't be so presumptuous. Sure, they'd had a good day today, easily transitioning from sightseeing to dinner without question, but perhaps Jimin wants time to himself.
"I thought maybe we could check out some bars," Jimin suggests when Yoongi hesitates for too long in answering him. "You know, if you're not doing anything else. I found this cool list online but no pressure."
"No, that sounds- fun," Yoongi replies, and it's actually a genuine answer. Jimin doesn't seem so certain
"You sure about that?" he checks, clearly still not quite able to fully judge what Yoongi's really thinking. There's a small smile on his lips but it's mixed in with obvious apprehension.
"No, I'd like that," Yoongi tells him.
It feels a little bit strange to admit that. But it's true; spending some more time with Jimin sounds like an acceptable way to spend his evening, and not just because his alternative is the dingy hotel room. Jimin's smile spreads properly across his face now, brightening up his features as his eyes crescent happily.
"Awesome," he nods. "I'm gonna need to change first though."
As much as Yoongi appreciates his newly purchased shorts today, he's still gotten pretty grubby and sweaty from the heat. Jimin looks down at his watch as he takes a final bite of pizza. Yoongi finishes his off too, wiping at his mouth with a napkin.
"Shall we say meet at ten?" Jimin suggests. "I can text you where to meet."
And so, 10pm finds Yoongi standing on the street outside of a crowded bar, loitering just far enough away from the front so that it's not obvious that he's waiting for someone.
He messages Namjoon as he's waiting, just for something to do. They'd messaged a little earlier Namjoon. Namjoon apparently was not impressed with the t shirt Yoongi suggested for his date with Seokjin. Although he did point out that Seokjin likes the colour pink, so it maybe could have worked. It worries Yoongi just how much knowledge Namjoon has stored away about his long-term crush.
hey how's it going?
you're lucky it's a workday or I'd kick your ass for messaging me so early
Damn, Yoongi's always forgetting about the time difference. That explains why Namjoon's messages dropped off mid-conversation earlier today.
I saw Notre Dame today
were you applying for the job of hunchback?
just for that I'm gonna bombard you with photos from today
do your worst
Yoongi opens the gallery on his phone, selecting a large block of photos he took today from both Notre Dame and Montmatre. He clicks send and watches the timers tick down on each of them. Yoongi scrolls down, looking back through them until- shit. He realises far too late that he's accidentally included one he took of Jimin in the cathedral earlier.
He kind of had to take it really. Yoongi was overwhelmed by the vastness inside the cathedral; the ancient walls, the smell of incense, the grand scale of it all. Despite already having visited once, Jimin seemed just as overcome too. He'd been gazing around, eyes shining with wonder. The candlelight had highlighted his face just right, making him look soft and almost a little ethereal. Yoongi had instinctively gone to take a photo but Jimin had caught him. Yoongi wanted to capture the look of awe on his face yet as soon as he spotted Yoongi he went shy, instead reverting into a silly pose. Yoongi instead ended up with a photo of Jimin trying toook saint-like next to the rows of candles.
Yoongi decides that playing it cool is his best option. Apparently he thought wrong.
who's the cutie?
I hope you don't refer to Seokjin like that
no I've got much better nicknames for him
of which I will explain to you in great detail unless you tell me who that guy is
just to warn you
a lot of them are about his dick
he's just a guy I met
a friend I guess
who the fuck you trying to kid?
I can have friends you know
I'm literally your only friend
I'm choosing to ignore that
Yoongi almost drops his phone in surprise at the soft voice behind him. He doesn't though, instead spinning around and clutching it tightly in his hand lest Jimin see any of that conversation.
"Hey," he replies awkwardly.
He blinks a few times when he takes in Jimin properly. He's wearing black skinny jeans, this time with a wine coloured t shirt. There's no eyeliner unlike last night, and instead of a necklace he's got a chunky leather bracelet on his wrist. He still looks just as good though. There's the faintest hint of a smile on his lips, his gaze travelling slowly along Yoongi's form.
Yoongi knows that he has made a bit more of an effort tonight. His scruffy sneakers are replaced with the one pair of decent boots he packed in his case. He's wearing blue fitted jeans with a light coloured shirt, the sleeves turned neatly up to his elbows due to the warmth that still lingers in the evening air. Jimin gives the tiniest of nods once his gaze ends up on Yoongi's face, as though giving some sort of approval, and Yoongi feels weirdly pleased at the reaction.
"Shall we?" Jimin asks, nodding towards the buzzing bar.
Yoongi nods and follows him through the open doors. It's busy inside but it doesn't feel cramped, the dark woods and the reams of books on the shelves giving the place a cosy ambience that isn't too stifling. They get their drinks at the bar before heading further into the space, eventually finding a small corner with room to stand comfortably.
"So, what were you doing on your phone just now?" Jimin smirks after taking a sip of his drink. "It looked like I'd caught you up to no good."
He grins as Yoongi tries not to look perturbed by the question. "I was just messaging Namjoon. Sending him some photos from today."
"Has he gone on his date yet?" Jimin asks, apparently having remembered what Yoongi told him about the developments with Seokjin yesterday. Yoongi shakes his head.
"No, that's not until Saturday," Yoongi says. "God, I can't really imagine him in a swanky restaurant. He's probably going to end up smashing an expensive bottle of champagne or something."
"Is he clumsy or does he just have money to burn?" Jimin checks.
"The first one," Yoongi chuckles lightly. "He's a menace to everyone within a mile radius. If there's something of yours he could break, believe me, he will."
Jimin laughs a little too before taking another gulp of his drink. "Let's hope that this Seokjin is the forgiving kind then."
Yoongi smiles and nods his agreement. "He seems like a good guy so far. I can't remember the last time Namjoon went out on a date," Yoongi sighs. "I feel bad not being there for him."
"You're there in spirit," Jimin assures him. He pauses, wetting his lips a little. "I hope it goes well for him."
"Me too," Yoongi replies. "He really deserves it. He's a great guy."
There's a few moments of silence between them. It feels strange thinking of home whilst being so far away. Strange, yes, but somehow not as sad as it has felt previously. Jimin takes the opportunity to update Yoongi on some of the things that his group of friends in Seoul have been up since Yoongi was an unexpected eavesdropper on their video call yesterday.
Hobi - or Hoseok as Yoongi now learns is his full name - has made it through to the quarter final of a local dance competition. Jimin has a ridiculously large grin on his face as he speaks, His pride in his friend's achievement is clear and it's somewhat touching to watch; to see how deeply connected Jimin is to those friends, so much so that their happy moments become his own. Jimin unfortunately won't be around to attend the next stage either but Taehyung and Jeongguk have promised to video it and send to him when it happens.
"I'll have to show you some of his videos," Jimin says. "I think you'll like them; he's very hiphop focused. Remind me to play you one tomorrow."
There's a edge of awkwardness as Jimin's words hover in the air between them from the implication that they may be spending tomorrow together as well. Jimin blushes, a light dusting of pink shading his cheeks, and he looks down.
"Or you know, I'll send one to you," he corrects himself. "You're probably sick of spending time with me by now."
"What are you thinking of doing tomorrow?" Yoongi asks, purposefully avoiding responding directly to Jimin's comment.
He fears that it would likely be the other way round; Yoongi has no doubt he's been something of a drag on Jimin's trip so far. Jimin's eyebrows raise a little in apparent surprise at Yoongi's question.
"I'm not sure yet," he says. "I was thinking of maybe heading out to Versailles. It looks pretty cool. Or- I dunno."
He shrugs, suddenly seeming reluctant to say much more. He shifts from one foot to the other, taking a long gulp of his drink. He's probably keen to avoid accidentally inviting Yoongi along and so looks out into the crowd. He clears his throat slightly.
"What are your plans?"
"Oh, I don't really know," Yoongi tells him truthfully.
He's only had a packed itinerary today thanks to Jimin. The thought of motivating himself to get out and sight-see on his own tomorrow doesn't sound quite so tempting. He too takes a sip of his drink.
"Well you know, if you're interested in seeing Versailles, maybe you could join me?" Jimin asks, voice soft and tentative. "I had a nice time today. You're good company when you want to be."
His words produce an unusual reaction in Yoongi; something like a pang of guilt from the memories of the times he's not acted kindly towards the man in front of him, and something almost like a flutter of excitement at the thought of Jimin enjoying spending time with him.
"I'd be down for that," Yoongi says, and Jimin smiles happily, eyes sparkling slightly.
"Cool," he nods. "We should probably get up a bit earlier than we did today 'cause it's outside the city. So don't let us get drunk again tonight." He punctuates the final sentence with a prod of his index finger to Yoongi's chest, and Yoongi nods solemnly in acceptance of the responsibility.
By midnight they're on their third bar and Yoongi's lost count of the drinks again, and he's pretty sure he's failed in his task of keeping their alcohol levels below drunk if the way Jimin's slight swaying is anything to go by. Or maybe it's Yoongi who's swaying.
"He wanted to be a rapper too you know," Jimin says enthusiastically, the conversation having looped back round to his friends from home. Most of Jimin's stories involve them.
"Who did, Tae?"
"Did I say Tae?" Jimin scrunches up his brow in confusion. "No, no, I mean Hobi."
Jimin's cheeks are pink from the alcohol and he keeps smiling as he stumbles over his sentences. It's kind of sweet. Yoongi doesn't remember him like this from the first night, but that's probably because of how blind drunk Yoongi was himself. He watches Jimin's lips as he speaks and gets an unbidden memory of how they felt against his own. He looks away.
"You and Hobi would really get on," Jimin continues.
"Because we're both failed rappers?"
"How can you have failed when you've never even given it a try?" Jimin asks accusingly.
Yoongi feels his shoulders tense. He knew he shouldn't have mentioned this the other night but all the drink made his lips loose, and somehow while describing his wish to work in the music industry, Yoongi had let slip that he'd once also harboured dreams of rapping himself.
"Aish, there's no point," Yoongi protests. "I'd probably be terrible."
He remembers having a very similar conversation with Yujin a year or two ago, but that time it was Yoongi wanting to try it out and Yujin providing the reasons why it wouldn't be a good idea. He didn't want Yoongi embarrassing himself, he'd said. He was only saying it because he cared. Yoongi swallows thickly.
"So what?" Jimin shrugs. "Least you tried. Anyway, I bet you'd be good."
"You're way too optimistic," Yoongi sighs.
"Nothing wrong with that," Jimin retorts, taking another swig of an unknown cocktail in his hand. "Go on, rap something to me."
"What, now?" Yoongi says, making a dismissive noise. "No way."
"Go on. I will if you will."
"You're gonna rap?"
Yoongi's question is unfortunately answered pretty quickly.
"Yo!" Jimin begins, voice far too loud for the small bar. A few people turn to look at him. "Yo, I'm Park Jiminie, here in Paris with my homie Min Yoongi-"
"Stop, stop!" Yoongi tells him, though he's laughing as he says it. He presses his hand over Jimin's mouth, muffling the next line. Jimin's eyes glint mischievously and Yoongi can tell that he's grinning.
"Are you gonna rap for me then?" Jimin challenges, breath hot against Yoongi's palm as he talks. "Otherwise I'll keep going."
"Okay, okay, I will," Yoongi concedes. "Later though. Not here."
This seems to be enough for Jimin. He nods to show he's finished and Yoongi tentatively removes his hand.
"Okay good," Jimin says. "Just try not to feel too challenged by my superior rap skills."
"It's tough but I'll try."
They leave that bar feeling distinctly merry, but the mood soon sours when Jimin checks his cash situation and realises that he’s spent all the money he brought with him for the evening. He stares glumly down at the empty wallet in his hands, as though if he looks at it long enough some more may miraculously appears.
“It’s okay, I’ve got my credit card,” Jimin tells him.
“No, don’t be stupid,” Yoongi tells him. “You’ve got to stick to your budget or you’ll be broke by the time you get to Spain.”
Jimin sighs but nods in agreement nonetheless. He shoves the barren wallet back into the pocket of his jeans. Yoongi would check in his own, but he knows the funds will be just as sparse.
“I don’t want to end the night yet though,” Jimin says quietly.
Yoongi bites down on his lower lip. He kind of doesn’t want it to end yet either. He scratches lightly at the nape of his neck, trying to think of an alternative. He casts his gaze around the street.
“Do you have a few Euros at least?”
“Yeah, I’ve got one Euro and some of those smaller coins,” Jimin replies.
Yoongi wets his lips lightly. “How do you feel about some more terrible cheap wine?”
Jimin laughs softly. “I feel pretty good actually.”
They end up at Yoongi’s hotel this time as it’s closer. Yoongi ignores the grumpy look thrown their way by the guy on the front desk when they come loudly stumbling through the main doors, bottle of bargain wine clutched in Jimin’s hands.
Once they’re in Yoongi’s room he immediately opens the window, trying to diffuse the musty, smoky smell that permeates the air. He idly notices that his stubbed out cigarette from last night is still in the glass on the side. Jesus, does this room ever get cleaned?
“Okay so the only glass in here has a cigarette in it, so we’re gonna have to drink from the bottle,” Yoongi advises.
“You’re a classy guy, Yoongi,” Jimin says as he unscrews the cap. “I like it.”
His face creases up in a wide smile and Yoongi gives him a curt little nod of agreement. Jimin places the cap on the small table before giving the contents a quick sniff. His nose scrunches in displeasure but he takes a swig of it anyway. He smacks his lips together afterwards in distaste.
“Maybe we should have gone for the red after all,” is his only comment.
He holds out the bottle and Yoongi wanders over to take it, gulping some down himself. It’s not great but he thinks it’s actually better than the wine they had last night. He sits down on the bed, shuffling up the mattress so that he’s leaning against the headboard, legs crossed. Jimin moves to sit opposite him, grabbing the bottle of wine for another glug.
“So do I get to hear you rap now?”
“I’m nowhere near drunk enough for that,” Yoongi tells him, although he’s probably getting there. “Anyway, I don’t have any lyrics with me.”
“You wrote lyrics?” Jimin asks, interested. He peers at Yoongi as he brings the bottle to his lips again and Yoongi casts his gaze somewhere else.
“Yeah, a few,” Yoongi shrugs. “They weren’t anything special though.”
Jimin looks like he wants to say something but he doesn’t. Instead he silently passes the wine back to Yoongi.
“Well, freestyle then,” he suggests.
Yoongi laughs awkwardly and shakes his head. Jimin sighs but he doesn’t push it any further. He pokes Yoongi’s foot gently.
“I’ll hear it one day,” he says with a kind smile. He purses his lips together for a few moments before his eyes light up. “Oh hey, do you want to see one of Hobi’s dances?”
To be honest Yoongi has about as little interest in watching people dance as he does in dancing himself, but Jimin looks so eager that he doesn’t want to say no. Jimin scoots up the bed, positioning himself so that he’s sat next to Yoongi, leaning against the headboard too. He unlocks his phone, scrolling through some social media accounts until he appears to find the right one.
It’s under the account name of busanjeon with the description HOBI HYUNG KILLING IT followed by a multitude of fire emojis. Yoongi takes a wild guess that this is probably Kook's – or Jeongguk, as he’s now discovered is his actual name – account. Jimin presses play.
A beat starts up, sounding tinny on the phone. Yoongi doesn’t recognise it; the lyrics are in English so he supposes it’s probably some American hiphop. The stage lights up and a guy starts dancing. He looks different to how Yoongi imagined him. Hoseok is tall and lean with a shock of orange hair . It takes while for Yoongi to get used to it and dismiss the image he’d created in his mind, which was of someone looking more similar to Jimin.
The routine is fast and snappy, and Yoongi has to admit that it does entertain him. There’s plenty of quick moves, all matched to the rhythm of the song and suiting the beat perfectly. When he can actually hear the music that is; a lot of the time he can only hear hollering from whoever is holding he camera – he assumes Jeongguk.
“Pretty great, huh?” Jimin grins once it’s finished.
“Yeah, it was,” Yoongi nods. “He’s really good.”
In fairness he wasn’t bored watching it and he would have been happy to watch a couple more minutes. Jimin looks pleased by his comments, blushing lightly as though directed at himself. It’s a sweet reaction and it makes Yoongi take another gulp of the wine. Jimin smiles down at his phone, lost in a thought for a moment before moving to put in back in his pocket.
“Wait,” Yoongi blurts out, surprising himself as much as it does Jimin. He swallows heavily, twisting the wine bottle around with his fingers. “Can I- are there any videos of you dancing?
Jimin’s eyes widen before he suddenly goes quite bashful, pressing his lips together and looking down at his lap. He fiddles absently with the phone in his hand.
“Uh, yeah I guess,” he says softly. “I mean, they’re quite different to Hobi’s stuff, but I can show you if you want.”
“I’d like to see,” Yoongi says genuinely. He must admit, he’s a little intrigued to see Jimin dancing. And in fairness, he did kind of offer to show Yoongi during their first night out together.
Jimin flushes and starts scrolling through his phone again. Yoongi takes another sip of the wine. Jimin seems to finally find what he’s looking for. The account this time belongs to a TaeRex95 which Yoongi immediately figures is Tae’s. The comment this time is a simple Jiminieeeeeee with at least twenty crying face emojis afterwards. Yoongi senses Jimin shift, seeming somewhat embarrassed.
“I hope all those crying faces aren’t because of how bad you were,” Yoongi says and he receives a nudge against his side for his comment.
Jimin starts the video and any teasing words soon die on Yoongi’s lips. There’s a piano accompaniment to this dance and Jimin’s right; it is very different to Hoseok’s dance. There’s no sharp slides, no energetic hip rolls or wild twists. Instead everything about the dance is slow, but carefully so, each movement timed to perfection. Jimin moves with total grace across the stage, body bending and flowing so fluidly that rather than keeping in sync with the music, it’s like him and the music have become one and the same.
Yoongi has no idea what the dance is meant to represent but he can tell that it’s sad, melancholic. Jimin’s expression pairs with his moves, the whole thing creating an atmosphere that seeps into the room despite Yoongi only seeing it through a small phone screen. He’s acutely aware of Jimin’s arm pressing against his as they watch; of the way he's holding his own breath, as though exhaling will somehow break the mood of the dance.
“So, what do you think?” Jimin asks nervously after it finishes.
“It was, uh-“ Yoongi begins, clearing his throat before trying again. “It was beautiful.”
He keeps staring down at the phone but he can feel Jimin shift again next to him. Maybe it sounds a bit over the top but, well- Yoongi can’t think of any other way to describe it. He lifts his head, turning to face Jimin. Jimin just looks back at him, blinking slowly, lips slightly parted. His cheeks are tinged with the same flush from before, though a little deeper now. Yoongi once more struggles to think of anything other than beautiful to describe him.
“Thanks,” Jimin eventually says, almost inaudible. He keeps looking at Yoongi, his gaze seeming to flicker down to Yoongi’s lips for the tiniest of moments before he catches himself. “So you definitely owe me a rap now.”
Yoongi takes a few moments before he manages to reply. “Noted."
Jimin swiftly moves the conversation on. They chat about nothing of particular importance; of movies they’ve seen recently, of food they’re looking forward to trying during their travels. It’s easy and it’s soothing, and Yoongi feels a little like he might prefer sitting here like this together than the bustling bars they visited earlier.
“So I should probably get going,” Jimin says, once the bottle of wine is down to its last dregs and the plastic clock on the bedside cabinet shows that it’s nearing 3am. “Up bright and early tomorrow, right?”
“Right,” Yoongi nods dumbly. He’d totally forgotten that they were meant to be going to Versailles tomorrow.
Jimin stands up slowly, checking his pockets for his phone and wallet. He wanders over to the door, hovering awkwardly there as though wanting to say something. He bites down on his lip however and stays silent, moving to open the door.
“You could just stay here. If you want.”
Jimin’s eyes widen slightly at Yoongi’s comment and Yoongi suddenly feels rather flustered. Jimin’s hand rests on the door handle as he looks over at the elder. Yoongi’s not entirely sure why but he doesn’t want Jimin to leave just yet.
“I mean, it’s a long walk back to your hotel,” Yoongi reasons. “And if we’ve got to get up early then it can’t hurt to get a bit more sleep.”
Jimin keeps looking over at him, brow furrowed ever so slightly as though trying to figure something out. Yoongi starts to worry that he’s really said the wrong thing. But then Jimin’s hand drops down from the door handle and the smallest of smiles appears on his face.
“Yeah, okay” he agrees. “Long as you don’t mind having to share the bed.”
“I don’t mind,” Yoongi tells him, mind flitting back momentarily to waking up curled around each other this morning. How oddly comforting he found it. He’s not expecting that to happen again of course, but simply having Jimin nearby is- well, it’s reassuring in a way Yoongi can’t quite explain. Jimin’s smile deepens that bit more.
Yoongi stands up to pull the curtains closed, leaving enough of a gap so that some of the fresh air can still make its way into the room. There’s a low murmur of noise outside still, but it’s more lulling than distracting. Yoongi clicks off the lamp though it doesn’t do much, not with the street lights outside still filtering in through the thin curtains.
“Do you mind if I, uh-“
Jimin’s sentence trails off and Yoongi glances over to his Jimin’s fingers hovering by the button of his jeans. In fairness it is very warm still and sleeping in jeans in uncomfortable. Yoongi’s learnt that the hard way over the last two nights.
“Sure,” Yoongi shrugs.
He purposefully looks down at the bed as Jimin slides out of his jeans and Yoongi follows. Jimin leaves his t shirt on and so does Yoongi. Yoongi climbs onto the bed, laying on top of the covers. The heat makes it too unbearable to think of getting underneath them. Yoongi now averts his gaze to the ceiling, although he can’t help but catch a glimpse of Jimin’s bare thighs and tight fitting underwear as he gets onto the bed too. Yoongi notices that Jimin's a lot more muscular than he is.
Once they’re both on the bed there’s an obvious space between them, despite the small size of the single mattress. They’re both on their backs, looking up at the ceiling. It’s almost kind of comical but Yoongi tries not to think on it.
“Night,” he says, before closing his eyes.
“Night,” he hears Jimin reply quietly.
There are a few long moments of silence that seem to drag on and on, before he feels Jimin shuffle and turn onto his side instead. Yoongi’s not sure if Jimin’s facing towards or away from him, his eyes remaining firmly shut. He’s not sure that he’s going to be able to fall asleep, not with the humidity and the proximity of Jimin, that is somehow both calming and unnerving. However the wine in his system seems to help and he drifts off within minutes.
When Yoongi next opens his eyes he’s surprised to find that it’s not morning but only just gone 4am. He’s barely slept for an hour. He can hear the gentle rhythm of Jimin’s breathing next to him. Yoongi props himself up on one elbow, running a hand blearily across his face. Jimin’s still on his side, facing the wall.
Yoongi watches him for a while. Listens to the steady inhales and exhales, sees the way his chest rises and falls. He’s simply laying there, sleeping, but there’s something still that draws Yoongi in. It frightens him a little to realise just how much he yearns to be closer. To seek that comfort he found last night by being near to Jimin.
Yoongi looks down a moment longer before settling in behind him, arm sliding around Jimin’s waist as his chest presses up against the younger’s back. He hopes that Jimin can’t feel the way that his heart has suddenly started racing. He nestles his face into the nape of Jimin’s neck and tries to keep his breathing slow and even.
At some point he feels Jimin stir. There’s a brief moment in which he tenses at discovering Yoongi wrapped around him, but he relaxes again quickly. Yoongi swallows but it feels like there’s a lump in his throat and he’s sure that the sound is much too loud. Jimin doesn’t move any more and Yoongi’s hand that rests on his stomach can feel the way that his breathing returns to normal.
Yoongi closes his eyes and after a while feels his own breathing settle down. Jimin feels solid and comforting next to him and Yoongi allows himself relax into the moment.
Yoongi’s not sure how much time has passed when Jimin’s hand slowly moves to cover his own; when Yoongi spreads his fingers just enough so that Jimin can lace his own fingers with them. Yoongi keeps his eyes closed and decides to just let it happen.
“Fuck, why’s it so bright?”
Jimin’s words are mumbled lowly, his body starting to move and subsequently waking up Yoongi in the process. Yoongi just about registers Jimin’s comment and he’s inclined to think the same. It’s way too bright right now. He gives a soft grunt of agreement. Yoongi’s brain is slow with sleep and it’s only when Jimin speaks again that he notices that their fingers are still linked together.
“What time is it?”
It takes all of Yoongi’s effort to lift his head up and look over his shoulder at the clock on the bedside cabinet. He blinks a few times to clear the blurriness before he can focus properly.
“What time were we meant to get up?” Yoongi checks.
“Like, nine at the latest,” Jimin tells him.
“Okay, well, it’s almost midday.”
Jimin’s only answer to that is a rumbling groan. Yoongi would laugh at the situation if his head wasn’t throbbing quite so painfully, and if he wasn’t quite so distracted by how Jimin’s fingers fit nicely with his own.
“Shit,” Jimin says after a long pause.
Yoongi does let out a small chuckle at that, even if it hurts to do so.
“I don’t know why you’re laughing,” Jimin murmurs drowsily. “You were meant to make sure that we didn’t get drunk.”
“Yeah, sorry about that.”
“You don’t sound very sorry.”
“Mm,” is all Yoongi says to that, this conversation already using up far too much limited energy.
Nothing more is said for a while, both of them feeling far too tired. The sunlight really is too bright and Yoongi presses his face further into Jimin’s neck trying to block it out. It’s comfortable here and the thought of having to get up and actually move seems horrific to Yoongi right now. Even with his stomach swirling so much from the way Jimin’s thumb has started to gently stroke over the back of Yoongi’s hand.
“So I’m thinking no to Versailles for today,” Jimin eventually says.
“Agreed,” Yoongi replies through a small yawn.
“’s a shame,” Jimin sighs. “It looked cool.”
“We can do it tomorrow,” Yoongi tells him.
There’s an obvious silence after that and Yoongi realises what he’s said. He has no idea if Jimin’s even still planning on being in Paris tomorrow and if so, he may not want to spend yet another day with Yoongi. His thumb keeps on stroking across the back of Yoongi’s hand.
“Sounds good,” he says finally and Yoongi feels a bit of tension he didn’t realise he was carrying dissipate with Jimin’s words. “What are we gonna do today though?”
Yoongi ponders a moment, mind filtering through all the ideas he had once circled in his guidebook. Eventually he thinks that he hits upon something suitable, if slightly unusual.
“I might have an idea,” Yoongi tells him hesitantly.
“Go on,” Jimin prompts, voice strangely low.
“Well, it involves us being in the dark-“ Yoongi begins.
“Sounds good so far,” Jimin says, voice still oddly low and whispered.
“I think it could be fun but it might be a bit of a weird suggestion.”
“Weird can be fun,” Jimin replies, tone sounding mildly suggestive. It confuses Yoongi but also sends an unexpected ripple of a shiver along his spine. “How weird are we talking?”
“Well, uh, what are your thoughts on skulls?”
Jimin instantly tenses up and rolls over. He blinks dazedly at Yoongi a few times and Yoongi tries not to miss the feeling of Jimin’s fingers as they leave his. Jimin’s brow is pinched in confusion. Yoongi knew this was a bit of an out there suggestion, but he’s heard it’s a cool place to visit.
“Skulls?” Jimin repeats blankly.
“Yeah,” Yoongi says apprehensively. “There are these underground catacombs that are meant to be really interesting but I know it might freak some people out so-“
His sentence trails off when he notices Jimin starting to laugh. He has no idea what’s going on so just smiles awkwardly.
“It’s a genuine tourist attraction,” Yoongi defends himself.
“I know, I know,” Jimin nods. “I just thought- never mind.”
“Nothing, nothing,” Jimin says dismissively, gathering himself before adding, “catacombs sound fun.”
It’s only after Jimin’s left to go back to his own hotel to shower and change that Yoongi realises what Jimin thought he might have been suggesting instead. Jimin’s already openly admitted that he likes Yoongi but it's another level to know that he would have happily let things take a more sexual turn if Yoongi had wanted to.
And Yoongi’s not quite sure how he feels about that.
"I take it all back, this place is fucking creepy."
It’s cool and dark down in the catacombs. Yoongi’s inclined to agree; it is a rather bizarre site. There are small paths that they follow in the low light, lined on either side with stacks and stacks of bones and skulls. Despite the presence of other tourists, it is still kind of eerie.
“Apparently there are the remains of more than six million people in here,” Yoongi reads aloud from his guidebook.
“Really not helping with the creepiness.”
Yoongi smiles slightly at Jimin before snapping a photo on his phone to send to Namjoon. This is the sort of weird shit that he knows Namjoon would appreciate. Jimin keeps glancing around warily, as though expecting something sinister to happen.
“Relax,” Yoongi tells him, placing a reassuring hand on Jimin’s shoulder. “These guys have been dead for centuries. They’re not about to suddenly come back to life.”
“Yes, I know that thank you,” Jimin replies huffily. “It’s just unsettling is all.”
Yoongi chuckles lowly and continues looking around. He drops his hand back down to his side. It is mercifully cool down here and it’s doing wonders for his hangover; the sunshine outside was far too intense.
A few seconds later he feels Jimin’s fingers grasp onto the fabric of his t shirt, clinging onto the loose material covering his back. He seems to be cowering behind Yoongi somewhat, as though expecting someone to jump out from behind the remains at any moment.
“Never would have had you down for such a fucking scaredy cat,” Yoongi teases as he snaps another photo.
“Shut up,” Jimin retorts, trying to sound moody but his laughter ruins the tone. He pinches Yoongi in the rib with the hand was just clutching onto his shirt.
They continue following the dimly lit pathways, sometimes finding passages busy with tourists and other times finding areas unusually clear of people. Yoongi read that they only let a certain number of people in here at any one time, so it’s much less busy that the crowded streets above them. It’s when they’re in one of these emptier chambers that Yoongi feels Jimin’s short fingers clasp around his wrist as they wander.
Yoongi’s breath catches slightly in his throat at the action. Fair enough, they were kind of holding hands a lot of the morning, but that was when they were sleep addled and probably still a tiny bit drunk. This is an entirely different situation and one that Yoongi’s really not used to. Even with Yujin they didn’t really show affection in public; it’s just not something would be accepted back in Daegu unlike here in Europe.
He lets Jimin’s hand linger there for a while longer until Jimin eventually seems to assumes that the lack of reaction means Yoongi doesn’t like it. He feels Jimin’s fingers start to move away and Yoongi misses the contact instantly. He grabs hold of Jimin’s hand, stilling his movement and linking their fingers lightly together. Yoongi can feel his heart pounding in his chest but he keeps his expression placid as he gazes along the walls.
He still feels completely muddled up about Jimin. He knows that he likes him being near. He knows that he enjoys the other man’s company. He knows that falling asleep with Jimin brings him an unexpected level of contentment. But after that, he’s not sure. There’s that part of him that liked their kiss the other night; that possibly wanted more.
But there’s a bigger part of him that for some reason still feels guilt. As though liking someone else somehow lessens what he felt for Yujin. He knows that he should hate Yujin for what he did but he can’t. He doesn’t feel anger, just sadness, over what he’s lost. He understands that one day he’ll have to move on but- well, he just didn’t expect to be confronted with such a situation so soon. The fact that he feels something for Jimin is completely unexpected and Yoongi doesn’t quite feel ready for it.
He feels Jimin’s hand gently squeeze his own, warm and reassuring, and he tries to stop overthinking it all. He sort of wants to hold Jimin’s hand right now and so maybe he should just let it happen. He tries to tells himself that it’s only holding hands- even if perhaps it might indicate something more. Somehow the darkness and the surreal surroundings make that easier to deal with.
It’s only when their time in the catacombs is almost over that Yoongi feels brave enough to actually chance a glance at Jimin. When he does Jimin meets his gaze easily, a soft smile upon his lips.
Their hands break apart once they reach the twisting flight of stairs that they need to ascend in order to exit. Yoongi’s legs feel wobbly by the time they reach the top, his hangover making his limbs more sluggish than usual. By the time they both emerge, blinking into the sunshine, they’re both more than ready for something to eat.
Their funds are somewhat depleted after last night’s cocktail splurge so they settle for sandwiches for dinner, sharing a large bag of potato chips between them. They find a shady spot in a boulevard to sit and eat them. They munch through the food in comfortable silence, occasionally making a comment but otherwise happy to sit quietly.
Jimin's phone buzzes a couple of times and he unlocks the screen, taking a moment to read the notification before bursting out in laughter. Yoongi peers over curiously and Jimin holds up the phone so that he can read the message.
I know you're being all touristy but
I need you
What are your thoughts on dick pics?
Jimin chuckles and he types out a reply. Clearly Taehyung is as much of an oversharer as Namjoon is. When he'd failed to respond to Namjoon's questioning about Jimin's photo last night it resulted in his phone being spammed with countless nicknames Namjoon has thought up for Seokjin's penis. Not what Yoongi wanted to wake up to when already feeling nauseous.
Are you asking me to send you one?
Yoongi leans in as he watches Jimin type, somehow pleased by the fact he's been allowed to view this conversation.
I've seen enough of your tiny dick to last me a lifetime
I just thought you'd have the most experience in this sort of thing
Yoongi blinks down at the screen. He's not looking at Jimin but he can almost feel the heat of embarrassment radiating of off him. It makes Yoongi feel uncomfortable somehow, that Taehyung would immediately think of Jimin as someone who sends - or receives - those kind of photos. He doesn't judge, it's just a weird thing to imagine.
I have neither a tiny dick nor experience in this
"Have you though?" Yoongi asks. "Sent one of those?"
Jimin seems such an open sort of person - and such a fan of selcas - that taking those type of photos doesn't seem totally unthinkable for him. Yoongi realises once he's spoken that it's a quite personal question and he feels bad for asking, especially when Jimin's head whips round to look at him so abruptly.
"No I've never sent anyone a photo like that," he laughs, trailing off before adding. "Received some, maybe."
Yoongi grins, glad that the mood has stayed lighthearted after his inappropriate question. Taehyung is typing something and they both watch the phone screen in anticipation.
"And I don't have a tiny dick either."
Jimin's muttered comment catches Yoongi off guard and it makes his cheeks flush. The sentence conjures up an array of images he really doesn't need right now.
"That's- good," Yoongi says awkwardly. Jimin just laughs softly.
Lies on both counts
Kook keeps asking for one and I don't know what to do
"Oh Jesus," Jimin sighs, as though this is the sort of problem he has to solve regularly for his friends.
"I didn't realise those two were together," Yoongi comments.
"Well I wouldn't say they're together," Jimin tries to explain. "I don't really know what they are exactly to be honest. More than friends but not quite boyfriends. Not yet at least."
Yoongi nods though it's not a scenario he's too familiar with. He's always been more of an all or nothing kind of guy.
Tae if you're not comfortable sending one just tell him
Kook will understand
no I mean
I'm cool with sending one
How should I do it?
Should I be doing a sexy pose
Or is it literally just full on penis?
"Why am I friends with these guys?" Jimin groans, running a hand over his face. He tries to look annoyed but it's far too laced with fondness to be believable.
just do what you feel like
Kook will love it so long as you're in it
Jimin doesn't get a response to that other than a stream of heart emojis and he swiftly locks his phone, shoving it back in his pocket before any more bizarre conversations can start popping up.
"Sorry about that," Jimin chuckles, taking a handful of potato chips. "I swear my life was so much more normal without them."
"More boring though too I imagine," Yoongi says as he uncaps his bottle of Coke.
"Yeah, for sure," Jimin grins.
The heat is still stifling despite sitting in the shade and combined with the stodgy food and a hangover, Yoong's starting to feel rather sleepy. He could probably do with a nap right about now.
"So, I really think I need to grab some more sleep for another hour or two," Yoongi eventually admits when the weariness truly starts to set in.
"Wow, you alright there grandpa?" Jimin teases lightly. "Sure it's not an excuse to ditch me?"
Yoongi's stomach plummets, knowing full well that is exactly what he tried to do to Jimin only two days ago. He tries to brush over it quickly.
"No, I'd come up with a better excuse than that," he reasons. He coughs quietly, unsure about whether to ask about Jimin's plans this evening or not. Luckily Jimin beats him to it.
"So uh, after your grandpa nap, are you doing anything tonight?" Jimin asks. Yoongi shakes his head. "Cool. Well I heard that at night the Eiffel Tower has all these illuminations and I was kinda hoping to check it out - if you'd be up for that?"
"Yeah, I would."
The evening air is still warm despite the late hour, though there's a very slight coolness that drifts past now and then. Yoongi feels much more refreshed after his nap, even if it did seem oddly lonely to wake up without Jimin's presence. He tries his best to shake the feeling; it's something he's going to have to get used to soon enough.
Jimin's already waiting for him outside the metro station they'd agreed to meet at by the time Yoongi arrives. Yoongi's not as dressed up as last night, both of them agreeing to steer well clear of any bars this evening, but he's still put on his cleanest and best fitting clothes. Jimin's in those dark grey jeans from before but paired with a simple white polo shirt. He still looks great. He smiles brightly when he spots Yoongi and somehow he manages to look even better.
"So apparently it's lit up for most of the night, but the sparkly shit happens on the hour," Jimin explains as they walk in the direction of the tower.
"Excellent. I always look forward to sparkly shit," Yoongi grins playfully.
"Yeah, you seem like a real sparkly kinda guy," Jimin deadpans and it makes Yoongi laugh.
Once they reach the tower Jimin's phone is immediately out, snapping photos of the lit up structure. He then moves position so that he's standing with his back to the tower, holding the phone out to take a selca, no doubt to send to Hoseok.
"Jimin, you know you said you were meant to come here with a friend - was that friend Hobi?" Yoongi asks as they find their way over to a bench, ready to settle in and wait for the next fifteen minutes until the light show starts.
"Yeah," Jimin says softly as they sit down. He sounds downcast as he speaks. "His dad- well, he's kind of sick and Hobi just didn't want to leave him for so long. I mean, I'm sure his dad will be okay but- you know."
"That makes sense," Yoongi says. "Least with the amount of photos you send him it's like he's almost here."
Yoongi knows that's not true by a long shot but it brings the flicker of a smile to Jimin's lips.
"I try. I thought at first it was kind of cruel to keep sending him pictures of what he's missing out on but he keeps asking me to send more," Jimin explains. "He says he likes seeing me happy."
Jimin looks down at his lap, gaze dropping from the lights in front of them. He seems a touch morose about it, and Yoongi's starting to wish that he hadn't brought the topic up. He was just curious about the situation. He wonders if Jimin would have been having more fun with Hoseok around. Most likely yes.
"He sounds like a good friend."
Jimin nods and forces his smile to deepen before looking over at Yoongi. "Yeah, he is."
They fall into silence, eyes focused on the tall structure looming ahead of them. A little while passes before Yoongi feels the weight of Jimin's cheek press against his shoulder, the younger leaning his body into Yoongi's.
The action makes Yoongi tense briefly before he relaxes into it. It's a simple gesture but his mind is whirring; remembering their kiss, the nights falling asleep together, the way they held hands earlier today. He still has no idea what he wants from Jimin. But he's pretty sure that he wants something. Yoongi's heart thumps wildly despite the serenity of the moment.
They stay in silence as they sit there. He's very aware of how their thighs press together; of how Jimin's hand rests near his knee, as though asking to be held. It surprises Yoongi how much he wants to do that again. He lets his own hand drift a bit nearer, pinky finger hooking over Jimin's.
"We're in the most romantic city in the world, watching the Eiffel Tower. I won't hate it if you hold my hand," Jimin tells him gently.
"Oh. Right," Yoongi says dumbly.
He moves his hand to lightly cover Jimin's. Jimin turns his hand over as he does so, so that they're palm to palm as their fingers link together. Yoongi's mouth feels dry and he hopes that his hand isn't too sweaty.
Holding Jimin's hand feels very different to Yujin's. Jimin's hand is a lot smaller, and a lot softer. Rather than being familiar and grounding, it makes Yoongi feel nervous - but in a way he doesn't entirely mind.
"Stop thinking so much," Jimin whispers. "You know I like you. Just go with it."
Yoongi swallows thickly as he tries to process Jimin's words. It's a lot to deal with; he just wishes he had more time, because he thinks that he might possibly like Jimin too. It's all just so unexpected, so soon.
"I'm scared to," Yoongi admits quietly.
It feels strange to actually voice it. To say out loud that the feelings Jimin stirs within him are exciting but also terrifying. That the idea of starting something with someone new is massive and overwhelming for him.
"Yoongi," Jimin sighs, but there's a clear fondness there. "Try not to make this bigger than it needs to be."
Yoongi's not quite sure what he means by that so stays quiet. He keeps staring ahead, determined and focused. Jimin's hand feels so warm in his.
"Do you like spending time with me, Yoongi?" Jimin eventually asks.
Yoongi nods and Jimin continues.
"Then that's all that matters. I'm not asking for your love or for us to be together. We're not here for much longer and who knows, maybe we'll never see each other again after this-" He pauses and Yoongi tries not to focus on how sad that thought is. "But if we have the chance to enjoy something a little- more while we can- then why not go with how we feel."
Yoongi stares ahead, trying to take it all in. He has been fearful of what exactly it is that he feels towards Jimin, of what it all means, but perhaps Jimin is right. Yoongi knows he's always been all or nothing, but maybe that's not the right approach.
Maybe he should just enjoy what moments he can with Jimin right now, while he has the chance. Because he knows that, although he's scared of acting on these feelings, the thought of letting them wither away, to say goodbye to the first person who's made him feel anything since Yujin without exploring it, seems just as scary.
He thinks it all over and the silence lingers for a long time, Jimin's words hanging between them and Jimin's hand solid against his own.
It must hit 9pm because out of nowhere the Eiffel Tower starts to glitter. It's dazzling and spectacular. Yoongi takes out his phone with his free hand, filming a short segment of it to send to his family. Jimin is filming it too and when Yoongi glances at him his eyes are shimmering happily, his mouth gaping a little from the display. Their other hands stay clasped together.
Yoongi puts his phone away after a minute or so, allowing himself to simply take in the view in front of him. He's acutely aware of Jimin next to him, of the unfinished conversation they've just had. Jimin eventually sits back too, phone getting shoved into his jean pocket as he watches with a beaming smile on his face.
Yoongi's not sure what it is. Whether it finally sinks in that he's here in Paris, doing something rather than pining away for a lost relationship back home. Perhaps it's the excitement of being in such a vibrant city, of seeing something totally new like the image in front of him right now.
Or maybe it's that when he looks at Jimin he truly appreciates his beauty, both inside and outside. Yoongi can't pinpoint the exact reason, but it doesn't really matter.
What matters is that when Yoongi leans in Jimin notices and turns his head, and that when Yoongi's lips press to his, Jimin kisses back.
This time it isn't needy or frantic like when they kissed in the club. Instead it's slow and thorough. Yoongi licks at Jimin's lips and they part easily for him. Yoongi's tongue slips inside, rolling hot and deliberate against Jimin's.
Yoongi pushes aside any thoughts that this is wrong. It's new, and a little nerve-wracking, to be kissing someone else after so many years. But it's good too, so good, and it just feels right. Yoongi's free hand lifts up to cup Jimin's jaw as the kiss deepens further and the soft noise that escapes Jimin at the action sends a pleasurable thrill through Yoongi, eventually settling in the pit of his stomach.
They pull away briefly, a series of soft, short kisses pressed to one another's lips before it gets heavier once more. Jimin's fingers curl into the collar of Yoongi's t shirt and they shift a little closer. Yoongi feels lightheaded from the rush of kissing, and from the way Jimin's tongue works his mouth just so wonderfully.
When they finally break apart they're both a little breathless despite the slowness of the kiss. Yoongi is almost dazed. Kissing someone other than Yujin after all these years feels bizarre, but in an amazing way. Jimin kisses differently, tender and yet full of passion, and it makes Yoongi feel a little bit weak. He kind of wants to do it again but Jimin's smiling at him now, full of affection.
"I can't believe you made me miss half of the light show," Jimin eventually says, gentle and playful.
"Sorry about that," Yoongi says, voice almost a whisper.
"No you're not," Jimin smiles. Yoongi can't help but smile back.
The walk back to Jimin’s hotel is thrumming with something like anticipation and whole lot like nerves. Yoongi had been keen to stay seated on that bench a while longer, and perhaps to kiss Jimin again, but an American couple had decided that they wanted their fill of Parisian romance and had not so quietly motioned for the pair of them to scoot along the bench so that they could sit down too. It got pretty awkward after that and Jimin casually suggested going back to his room instead.
If Yoongi felt awkward sharing that cramped bench with the American couple, it’s nothing compared to the tension he feels right now as they approach Jimin’s hotel. Sure, he wanted to kiss Jimin earlier, and he definitely enjoyed it. But there’s something in the suggestion of going back to a hotel room that implies taking things further.
The level of panic within Yoongi rises rapidly as they ride the rickety elevator up to Jimin’s floor. He doesn’t want to disappoint Jimin but at the same time, it was a big step for him to have that kiss earlier. Having sex seems like a whole other level and one Yoongi’s really not sure he’s ready to climb to.
Once inside the room Yoongi hovers by the door, not quite sure what to do. Jimin looks over at him curiously, his features soft. He wordlessly tugs off his jeans, flinging them over the back of the threadbare chair. Yoongi gulps, watching as Jimin gets under the covers. Jimin looks over at him, switching on the lamp. His expression is still almost unbearably soft.
“Come on,” he says gently. “We need to actually get up early this time.”
Yoongi switches off the main light and cautiously removes his own jeans, placing them on top of Jimin’s. He climbs in under the covers and lies on his back, an obvious gap between the two of them. Jimin clicks off the lamp and the room becomes a bit darker. Jimin’s hand falls to rest on Yoongi’s waist and Yoongi flinches slightly.
“Jimin, I’m not sure-“ he begins anxiously, but Jimin cuts him off.
“It’s okay,” Jimin says soothingly. “We don’t have to do anything. We can just sleep. I just kind of like you being a bit closer.”
He lets out a quiet, embarrassed chuckle at his statement. His words make Yoongi feel warm; he likes Jimin being closer too. He shuffles a bit nearer and Jimin’s arm slides across his stomach, the younger curling into his side, face pressed into his neck.
“So you don’t want to do anything?” Yoongi checks again before he lets himself relax too much.
He feels rather than hears the small huff of laughter from Jimin. “Well, I’d be lying if I said I didn’t,” Jimin admits. “But it doesn’t matter. ’s just nice being with you.”
Yoongi’s heartbeat feels a little erratic, from the sweet words and the closeness of Jimin. And also a little from the fact that Jimin wouldn’t be averse to something more happening. Yoongi tries not to think on it too much and instead drapes his arm around Jimin’s waist, bringing him that bit closer.
When Yoongi wakes up the clock on the side reads almost three am. It’s a little too warm in the room but he’s reluctant to get up and open the window, not with the way Jimin’s melded to his side. He feels a little calmer than before, though he still gets a zip of excitement at remembering their earlier kiss. He really wishes he’d been able to do it again.
Yoongi’s arm is numb from where Jimin’s laying on it and he tries to shift slightly to bring some feeling back into it. The movement causes Jimin to stir, making a groggy noise of discontent as he rolls onto his back. It makes Yoongi smile. He shakes out his arm before trying to tug Jimin back towards him again but the younger’s having none of it. Instead he pulls Yoongi to him and Yoongi follows his lead, nestling in against Jimin’s side.
Despite not having had quite enough hours of sleep, Yoongi feels awake, a buzz of energy flowing through him. Jimin’s so close and Yoongi’s sight seems suddenly transfixed by Jimin’s parted lips. He remembers how they felt against his own.
“Jimin?” he whispers.
“Yeah?” comes the response, almost inaudible.
Yoongi’s not quite sure how he wants to continue his sentence and says nothing more. His silence seems to draw Jimin’s attention and he shifts more onto his side, facing Yoongi. Even in the dim light Yoongi can see the way he looks at him, the openness of his gaze. It makes Yoongi’s stomach clench.
He doesn’t say anything more, simply leans in and brings their lips together. There’s a soft whimper from Jimin as he parts his mouth and it makes Yoongi’s stomach clench even tighter. The kiss is sleepy and slow but it’s exactly what Yoongi craves right now. He carefully explores the wet heat of Jimin’s mouth, breathing heavily through his nose as he does so. Jimin inches closer and Yoongi kisses him deeper.
It’s intense despite how languidly their tongues glide together, and Yoongi can’t quite get enough of the taste of Jimin, something entirely new but wonderful. It seems that Jimin feels the same about him, licking steadily into his mouth, unrushed and yet it makes Yoongi feel like his heart could burst out of his chest at any moment.
Yoongi keeps edging closer, finally working up the courage to place his hand on Jimin’s waist. Jimin seems to take that as a cue, his own hand resting on Yoongi’s hip and starting to rub lightly over the fabric of his t shirt. Yoongi feels a shiver of excitement rush through him and he lets his fingers grip tighter in the material of Jimin’s shirt.
Yoongi completely loses track of time, no idea how many minutes have passed getting lost in their kisses. At some point Jimin moves onto his back more fully and Yoongi follows, hooking one leg over Jimin’s and draping himself half over Jimin’s chest. The kiss stays leisurely and undemanding but there’s an extra heat to it. Jimin’s hands drop to the small of Yoongi’s back, stroking lazy circles against him.
The kiss gets ever deeper, Yoongi sliding a little further across Jimin’s chest. As he does so his thigh inadvertently brushes over Jimin’s crotch and he freezes. The kiss breaks as his mouth parts in surprise. Jimin is quite blatantly hard and currently pressed into the skin of Yoongi’s thigh, Jimin’s underwear doing nothing to mask how aroused he is.
“Sorry,” Jimin whispers sheepishly against the corner of Yoongi’s mouth. “Can we, uh, just ignore that.”
“Yeah, okay,” Yoongi whispers back, although he’s not entirely sure that he can.
Yoongi's mind is spinning, dizzy with the knowledge that Jimin’s got so turned on simply from kissing him. It feels kind of overwhelming but there's something about it gives Yoongi an almost proud thrill. His stomach dips pleasurably as Jimin captures his lips once more. Yoongi tries his best to ignore the hardness pressing into his leg but it’s near impossible. He shifts slightly, trying to position himself so that it’s not as obvious, but in doing so his thigh rubs more firmly against Jimin.
The kiss breaks with a sharp gasp from Jimin and the sound echoes loudly in Yoongi’s ears. Jimin’s hands fly to grip onto Yoongi’s hips, holding him still. Jimin takes a few moments, breath noticeably shaky, before he speaks.
“Maybe we should get some sleep,” Jimin murmurs against Yoongi’s neck, his breath hot on the skin there. “I’m struggling a bit here.”
He lets out a quiet, breathy laugh and Yoongi swallows heavily. He kind of doesn’t want to stop; he wants to elicit another gasp from Jimin, wants to discover how far Jimin would like to go. But the realisation of that is a lot to handle and his heart starts racing much too fast. Maybe sleep is a good idea after all.
“Sure,” Yoongi agrees, voice trembling a lot more than he would like.
Jimin sighs quietly as Yoongi carefully moves off of him. Jimin closes his eyes, breathing in and out slow and deliberate as though trying to calm himself down and Yoongi can’t quite look away. Eventually Jimin shifts to on his side, gripping Yoongi’s wrist lightly and tugging the elder down to lay behind him, Yoongi’s chest curved around Jimin’s back. Their hands tangle together loosely over Jimin’s chest.
It takes Yoongi a long time to fall back to sleep.
“Wow, look at this place!”
Jimin’s voice is full of awe as they walk through the large entrance to Versailles. His enthusiasm for every new sight that they see is almost cute and Yoongi just smiles over at him. Jimin grins back, wide and excited.
Yoongi’s left his rucksack at the hotel today, his camera instead hanging from a strap around his neck. Jimin still makes do with the camera on his phone and he’s already started eagerly snapping photos. Yoongi stalks around, trying to find the best angle at which to take his own pictures from. Eventually he finds a good spot, crouching down and pressing the shutter.
The atmosphere between the two is light and easy, almost as though last night didn’t happen. As though they hadn’t shared a kiss in front of the Eiffel Tower yesterday evening, and as though they hadn’t indulged in a heated make out session in bed in the early hours of the morning. It’s almost like nothing happened.
But there’s something extra there today. A low thrum of happiness, a knowledge that things have shifted a little between them. And it’s not a bad thing. Yoongi feels a hint of giddiness at the development, at realising that he has some sort of feelings for Jimin simmering beneath the surface and that he maybe likes that fact. There’s still a good deal of nerves mixed in there but he tries his best to focus on the excitement rather than the fear.
They overslept this morning, though only by an hour or so, yet it meant that Yoongi was stumbling out of the door and back to his hotel room before they had a chance to really let last night sink in. The knowledge is slowly settling in over the course of the morning, becoming apparent during the furtive glances on the train ride and the way Jimin’s shoulder kept accidentally bumping against Yoongi’s as they waited in line for tickets.
Yoongi doesn’t really know where this will go, if it goes anywhere at all, but he’s trying to heed Jimin’s words from last night. Trying to just enjoy these moments, to just go with how he feels, even if those feelings do startle him sometimes.
Once they’ve taken their fill of photos they head into the main palace. They start their Korean audio guides, unable to make sense of what they’re seeing otherwise. Yoongi pops the headphones into his ears, letting the monotone words wash over him. He swears they pick the people with the dullest voices for these things.
Yoongi snaps a few pictures as they walk round, taking care to not use the flash. He spots a group of tourists get told off by one of the guards for using their flash and the guy doesn’t look like he’d be so lenient the next time. Yoongi does his best to pay attention to all the things that the audio guide points out to him but he feels unusually distracted. His gaze keeps drifting back to Jimin; to the way he looks around so appreciatively, to the way his fingers fiddle absently with his earring, to the way he wets his lips every so often.
Now and then Jimin will be back at Yoongi’s side, pulling out a headphone bud and whispering excitedly about something cool he’s just seen. His arm slips around Yoongi each time, guiding him towards the item in question, before they both get lost in their individual guides again. One time however Jimin’s arm remains looped around his back and Yoongi’s stomach flutters wildly.
They wander around the rest of the palace like that, shoulders nudging together as they drift from room to room. The interior is breathtaking, grand and ornate and ostentatious and unlike anything Yoongi’s ever seen before. Sometimes Jimin leans in, breathing a comment against his ear, and Yoongi feels an entire world away from Daegu right now.
Their lunch consists of some overpriced snacks from one of the vendors and they eat greedily, stomachs churning from lack of breakfast this morning. They spend the afternoon wandering around the gardens and the grounds, the vastness and scale infinitely impressive. They chat lazily, the warmth of the sun making them sluggish. Jimin’s arm is no longer around his waist and Yoongi kind of misses it.
“So do I get to take a photo of you yet?” Jimin asks casually as they walk alongside a man-made lake. The palace is behind them, forming a picturesque background.
“Fine, if you have to,” Yoongi sighs loudly and Jimin smiles ridiculously brightly.
He gives Yoongi no chance to change his mind, instantly pulling him close and holding out his phone. Yoongi’s no good at posing so just gives a small, closed mouth smile whilst Jimin beams at the camera. Jimin snaps a few before shading the screen from the sun and squinting down as he scrolls through them.
“Hey, we look good together,” Jimin grins breezily.
Yoongi peers over his shoulder to look. Yoongi’s not normally a fan of being in photographs but he has to admit, they kind of do look good together. He clears his throat lightly.
“Maybe send one to me?” he asks quietly before heading over to look at the fish swimming in the water. He doesn’t turn to see Jimin’s reaction, but he hears the smile in his voice when he replies,
The train ride back into Paris seems to take longer than it did in the morning. Maybe it’s because of the tiredness that seeps into Yoongi’s limbs from all the walking today, or because of how sticky he feels from the heat, desperate for a shower.
“I think you got a little burnt on your nose,” Jimin comments when he stops looking out of the window and faces Yoongi again. He taps the bridge of Yoongi’s nose with his index finger. Yoongi scrunches up his face at the action and it makes Jimin laugh softly.
Yoongi takes out his phone, using the camera to check himself out. Sure enough it does look a little bit darker than the rest of him. Jimin seems to have fared fine, his skin still a lovely even golden colour.
“This is why I prefer the winter.”
Jimin yawns widely, eyes going slightly unfocused as he stares out at the blurred scenery rushing past the train windows. Yoongi uses the opportunity to catch up on some of his messages. He assures his mom that he’s still alive and well; lets his brother know that no, he’s not yet seen anyone wearing a beret; and offers some words of moral support to Namjoon, who’s freaking out about his swanky date with Seokjin tomorrow.
Yoongi opens the photo that Jimin sent him earlier, the two of them in the grounds of Versailles. Despite his reluctance Yoongi realises that he actually looks kind of- happy. He chews on his lower lip and saves the picture.
“So am I allowed to know where we’re going yet?”
“I mean even if I tell you the name, it’s not really gonna help is it?”
Jimin huffs but seems to agree as he stops asking. Yoongi looks down at the map on his phone, trying to work out if they need to walk down this street or the next one. He glances up at the street name. This one.
They turn down the road, Yoongi looking around for the small restaurant. He’d been hesitant about suggesting this tonight but Jimin had no dinner plans and, well, it would be a shame not to try some of those places he’d so carefully selected in his guidebook. Maybe he didn’t get to try the restaurant with Yujin, but perhaps Jimin will enjoy it instead.
“Here it is.”
Jimin looks suspicious as they stop outside a ramshackle looking venue. The door could do with fixing and some of the paintwork on the shop sign needs repainting. But Yoongi has faith in his guide book. It did say that the place was rustic.
They go inside and just getting a table is something of a struggle, the owners only speaking heavily accented French and Yoongi resorting to saying things in Korean, just very loudly, in the vain hope that the waiter will somehow understand.
Eventually they’re seated. Jimin’s looking around, seeming a bit happier now that they’re inside. Although the front of the restaurant looks a bit dilapidated, the inside is busy and cluttered but full of a welcoming and cosy ambience. The guide book raved about this family-run establishment, claiming that it was the best for authentic – and relatively inexpensive – French cuisine.
The menu is entirely in French and Jimin gives it his best shot at trying to pronounce the dishes. God knows how terrible he must sound to French ears. Yoongi is completely lost looking at the French words and resorts to just pointing at a couple of items in the right price range when the waiter comes over to take their order. He also manages to procure a bottle of red wine, though how he did so he’s still not entirely sure himself.
Jimin sips tentatively at the wine, lips curling up into a smile at the taste. Yoongi pours himself a glass and they clink them together.
“This place is cute,” Jimin declares after another sip of wine.
“Is cute good?” Yoongi asks.
Jimin laughs a little. “Yeah, it’s good.”
Yoongi takes a long gulp of wine, savouring the taste against his tongue. His recalls the way Jimin tasted when Yoongi kissed him, sweet and fresh and intoxicating.
“So I got my first assignment emailed to me today,” Jimin says after a while. “Setting work over summer break should actually be illegal.”
“Yeah, that sucks,” Yoongi agrees. He wonders what sort of work you set for a modern dance major.
“Least I enjoy it,” Jimin says. “Most of the time.”
Jimin pauses and takes another swig of wine. “What do you think you’ll do when you go back home?”
Yoongi hasn’t really thought about it. He’s barely started this trip; thinking about going back to Daegu is the last thing on his mind right now. He knows it’s something he has to consider at some point though.
“I really don’t know,” Yoongi sighs. “I mean, I quit my job right before a big project and left them in the lurch, so I doubt they’d want to take me back. I guess my dad might be able to get me something at his company.”
It’s a depressing thought. He worked at his office job before solely to save up money for this trip; the thought of doing so with no end in sight, no goal he’s reaching for. Well, it seems pretty bleak.
“I thought you wanted to work in music?”
“Yeah but- that’s probably not gonna happen.”
“I dunno,” Yoongi shrugs. “I’d have to move to Seoul. And it’s all like unpaid internship stuff, I couldn’t afford it.”
“There’s always a way,” Jimin says. “You could work a second job maybe? And moving to Seoul isn’t that bad.”
“Yeah, maybe,” Yoongi smiles. He thinks it’s something of a distant dream, but he wants Jimin to know that he appreciates the interest. He tries to change the slant of the conversation. “Or maybe I’ll make it as a rapper first.”
“Well yes, there’s obviously that,” Jimin grins. “I’m still waiting on my private rap performance though.”
“Ah, I just need to find the right lyrics,” Yoongi says as a way of getting out of it.
“Can you write a rap about me?” Jimin asks, eyes lighting up in delight.
“Sure,” Yoongi nods. “I can do that.”
“Ah see, I knew you were a romantic at heart,” Jimin teases, and Yoongi feels Jimin’s foot nudge against his own under the table.
“Well, you haven’t heard the lyrics yet…” Yoongi teases back and it makes Jimin laugh.
They chat easily until their meal is eventually brought out. One huge plate of unknown food arrives on the table, steaming hot and looking delicious. Then another, and another, and just when Yoongi thinks everything has been served, one more.
“Oh my god Yoongi, how much did you order?” Jimin grins, and Yoongi’s really not sure what happened.
“Don’t ever say I don’t treat you,” is all Yoongi says and Jimin keeps on grinning.
They somehow make their way through the mountains of food and a worryingly small amount is left at the end, their small frames belying their huge appetites. They slump into their seats afterwards, sated and full. Yoongi can feel his cheeks flush from the food and the wine, and when Jimin smiles at him over the table, soft and almost seductive, Yoongi doesn’t have the willpower to resist the butterflies that erupt in his chest.
“That was a great dinner,” Jimin remarks on their leisurely walk back. Yoongi idly notes that they’re heading towards Jimin’s hotel again but he doesn’t mention it.
“I’m glad you liked it,” Yoongi says. “That was the one place I wanted to try the most when I was planning this trip.”
Jimin doesn’t say anything for a moment, his foot scuffing against the ground.
“I’m sure you didn’t ever envisage it being me you went there with, huh?”
“Well, no,” Yoongi admits. He does wonder what Yujin would have thought of it; whether he would have found it charming or whether he would have found it too outdated. Yoongi licks his lips lightly. “I’m glad that I could share it with you though.”
Jimin stays silent for a while but then Yoongi feels Jimin’s hand slip into his and suddenly it’s all he can focus on. It’s nice, wandering down the still-busy streets like that, a cool breeze breaking through the humidity as they walk.
“Like, I know you’re still all defensive over your ex,” Jimin says. “But if you ever want me to fuck that guy up, I will do.”
Yoongi lets out a burst of laughter at that. Yujin was tall and broad and heavy set, and the thought of Jimin trying to beat him up brings a smile to Yoongi’s face. It’s a sweet comment though, even if not said in total seriousness, and Yoongi appreciates the sentiment.
“Thank you,” Yoongi grins. “I’ll keep that in mind.”
They’re almost back at Jimin’s hotel when Yoongi feels a sharp tug on his hand. He gets dragged sideways, stumbling into a quiet alleyway. He barely gets a moment to gather himself before Jimin’s lips are on his. Yoongi’s vaguely aware of the noise of revellers on the street, of the scent of cooking food from the restaurant they seem to be behind.
His attention is on Jimin however. On the way that the younger presses into him, on the way he kisses hot and deliberate. Jimin’s hands curl into the front of his shirt and Yoongi’s rest on Jimin’s waist, keeping him close. Their tongues glide easily together and Yoongi hadn’t quite realised just how much he’d wanted this again after last night.
“Sorry,” Jimin murmurs against his lips when they pull apart. “Apparently I get too carried away kissing you in the room and I want you to stay tonight so-“ He leans in, pecking Yoongi on the mouth lightly. “Thought I should probably get it out of my system here first.”
“Very thoughtful,” Yoongi tells him, before leaning back in for another long kiss.
Jimin’s tactic doesn’t entirely work. Mainly because by the time they get to the hotel room Yoongi’s so riled up that he kisses Jimin as soon as the door is closed. Jimin lets out a muffled yelp of surprise as Yoongi pushes him up against the door, kissing him deep and wet until they’re both breathless.
“Fuck,” Jimin whispers, nipping at Yoongi’s lower lip. “What’s gotten into you all of a sudden?”
“I just like kissing you,” Yoongi tells him simply.
There’s a lot of things that make him feel muddled and confused about Jimin, about the way he makes Yoongi feel, but one thing he knows for certain is that he definitely likes kissing Jimin. He moves in again, trying to bring his lips to Jimin’s but there’s a firm hand on his chest, pushing him away gently. Yoongi’s brow furrows.
“I really hate to break the moment but I kind of need the bathroom.”
It’s such a blunt statement and not at all sexy. They hold each other’s gaze for a few seconds before bursting into laughter.
“I’ll be quick,” Jimin promises, wriggling out of Yoongi’s hold. He opens the door again and dashes down the corridor to the shared bathroom.
Yoongi takes the moment to gather himself, think a little straighter. He honestly never thought after Yujin that he would want to be kissed by anyone else again, let alone actively seek it out. Yet there was something that lured him in that first time in the club with Jimin, an insistent part of him that wanted more, and now he has it he just can’t get enough. It’s a huge surprise to him, but a very pleasant one.
He sits on the edge of the bed, running a hand through his hair. He toes off his shoes, tapping his sock clad feet against the thin carpet. He thinks it over a few more seconds before removing his jeans and socks too. They've slept like this before; not a big deal. He gets on top of the covers, laying on his back and staring up at the ceiling. Jimin quickly returns, closing the door and struggling with the tricky lock again before it shuts properly.
He takes off his shoes and jeans off too, smiling over at Yoongi. He switches off the main light before clicking on the lamp. He kneels on the bed to the side of Yoongi. He traces two of his fingers lightly down Yoongi’s arm. Yoongi reaches out with his other arm, pulling Jimin down onto the mattress.
Jimin follows him down, hooking a leg over Yoongi’s and sliding his body over the elder’s. Yoongi lets his hands rest over his shoulder blades, feeling the muscles of Jimin’s back shift beneath the fabric of his t shirt. Their mouths find each other’s again, kissing softer and slower now, the pace calmer.
Yoongi can’t remember the last time he did this, just kissing for the sake of kissing. Jimin’s tongue slips past his lips perfectly, taking his time as he explores every inch of Yoongi’s mouth. Yoongi can feel the way that Jimin sighs into the kiss and it sends a pleasurable wave through him.
Jimin’s propped up by his forearms, one placed either side of Yoongi. He tentatively lifts one up, fingers starting to stroke against the curve of Yoongi’s neck. Eventually they slide into his hair, carding through the strands as Yoongi tilts his head, deepening the kiss impossibly further. Yoongi’s hands twist slightly into the material of Jimin’s shirt.
“Shit, can we just do this all day tomorrow?” Jimin sighs into the kiss, lips moving down to press along Yoongi’s jaw.
“I dunno, I’ll have to see what my guide book says,” Yoongi replies.
Jimin laughs, breath huffed out hot against Yoongi’s cheek. It lightens the mood a little, calming some of the nerves that have begun to build up in Yoongi once more upon feeling Jimin’s mouth start to gently suck on a spot below his ear.
“I’m sure it has great reviews,” Jimin murmurs against him.
Their mouths find each other’s again, tongues meeting in an unhurried, wonderfully slow slide. Jimin brings his other hand to Yoongi’s hair too, almost cradling his head. Yoongi cautiously trails his hands down to rest on Jimin’s lower back. He likes the feel of Jimin beneath his fingertips. He kind of wants to feel a little more.
He pushes his fingers just slightly underneath Jimin’s t shirt, touching the smooth skin at the small of his back. He hears the almost inaudible gasp that it elicits in Jimin and he licks deeper into Yoongi’s mouth. Yoongi likes getting that reaction. He rubs against the skin more firmly.
Jimin very cautiously lowers his body down, so that instead of holding his body just above Yoongi’s it’s draped fully over him. His weight feels good against Yoongi, his frame solid as it presses down into the elder. Yoongi instinctively arches up into it, the movement pulling another soft gasp from Jimin.
Yoongi’s lips already feel tender from all the kissing but he doesn’t want to stop. He likes this, really likes it, and he lets himself go with it, just like Jimin told him. The pace stays slow, almost sensual, and Yoongi can feel the blood pounding in his ears. It feels amazing. He’d be more than willing to take up Jimin’s suggestion of doing this all day tomorrow, even if Yoongi’s pretty sure he was only kidding.
Jimin’s mouth leaves him once again, lips dragging along Yoongi’s throat. Yoongi’s head tips back to let him and he feels Jimin’s grip tighten ever so slightly in his hair. Jimin’s other hand moves to tug the neck of Yoongi’s t shirt down just enough so that he can mouth at the dip above his collarbone.
It makes Yoongi writhe at the sensation, Jimin’s tongue working expert and hot against his skin. He wonders if he should be doing something more for Jimin but for the moment he lets Jimin continue with his ministrations. Yoongi simply pushes his fingers a bit further beneath Jimin’s t shirt, tracing along his spine.
“Can you take it off?” Yoongi whispers.
He surprises himself with his own bravery, but he’s trying to go with how he feels and, well, touching more of Jimin is what he wants right now. Jimin seems a bit surprised too, a few moments of hesitation passing before he nods. He sits up, straddled across Yoongi’s thighs as he grabs the hem of his shirt and pulls it off over his head, tossing it to the floor.
Yoongi doesn’t actually mean to voice that thought out loud but it slips past his lips before he can stop himself. He knew that Jimin wasn’t going to have a bad body, not with how nicely toned his arms are and how muscular his thighs are. But he wasn’t quite expecting him to be so defined beneath his shirt too.
“Shut up,” Jimin flushes, whacking Yoongi lightly on the shoulder. He looks suddenly very shy. “Come on, you too.”
Yoongi feels anxious. His body is in no way as taut and solid as Jimin’s, and he can’t help but feel like he’s going to be a disappointment. But Jimin smiles down softly at him, and Yoongi finds himself pulling off his own t shirt, letting it drop to the floor next to Jimin’s.
Jimin’s fingers trace across his stomach, walking up to Yoongi’s sternum. He’s still smiling, looking almost fondly down at Yoongi. He wets his lips, leaning in and pressing a kiss to Yoongi’s shoulder before covering Yoongi’s body with his own once more. It feels entirely different, the amount of skin now against skin. More intense, more nerve-wracking.
Yoongi’s arms wrap around Jimin’s back, clinging onto him as Jimin seeks out the heat of his mouth once more. They kiss lazy and deep, as though they have all the time in the world. Yoongi supposes they kind of do; they have no commitments right now. No places to be, no jobs to be doing. It’s a nice thought.
They press into each other as they kiss, bodies craving the touch of each other. Jimin occasionally lets out soft little sighs into Yoongi’s mouth and it makes Yoongi shiver pleasurably whenever he hears it.
Yoongi’s not sure how long they’ve been kissing for when he feels Jimin starting to get hard. He pays little attention to it at first but it gets a lot trickier to do as Jimin just gets harder and by a point the firm pressure digging into Yoongi’s hip is impossible to ignore.
“Jimin,” Yoongi says gently, drawing Jimin's attention to the situation, even though he’s sure Jimin is very much aware of it.
“Sorry, sorry,” Jimin whispers, face pressed into Yoongi’s neck. “It’s just- fuck, you’re really hot.”
He laughs softly. His words make Yoongi flush, from bashfulness but also from the way his stomach twists pleasurably. Jimin presses a brief kiss to Yoongi’s neck before pulling away, moving to roll off of Yoongi.
“Okay, just give me a minute and-"
“Don’t,” Yoongi whispers, gripping onto Jimin’s waist and keeping him in place.
He hears Jimin swallow more than sees him. Jimin props himself up, looking down at Yoongi. His brow pinches together.
“You sure?” he checks. “I don’t want to make you uncomfortable, or feel like you have to-“
“You won’t. You don’t.”
He kind of enjoys feeling it, knowing that it’s because of him. That someone finds him attractive, desirable. And not just anybody, but someone as amazing as Jimin. It’s new, unfamiliar, but it’s exciting too. Jimin stares down at him a little longer until something seems convince him. He dips his head down, drawing Yoongi into another kiss.
It’s still slow but there’s another, more heated layer to it somehow. Jimin’s hips move more deliberately now and Yoongi can feel the outline of his length, obvious as it rubs against Yoongi’s lower abdomen. Yoongi keeps his hands gripped on Jimin’s waist, guiding his movements ever so slightly. He’s still got his underwear on but Yoongi can tell how hard he is, and it makes him giddy from the thought.
Jimin’s hips continue their lazy rolls down into him and occasionally the kiss breaks off with a shaky gasp. Yoongi’s fingertips dig a little deeper as he absorbs the feeling of it all, of Jimin against him and the way that he kisses and fucking everything about the moment.
At some point he feels it kick in, the low, persistent buzz of arousal starting in his own body. The more that he becomes aware of it the less Yoongi can do to stop it. He tilts himself slightly, manoeuvring so that every time Jimin rocks into him, Yoongi’s own clothed cock rubs against the firm muscle of Jimin’s thigh.
The friction is hot and wonderful against him. Yoongi’s soon fully hard. The low thrum becomes an intense throb as he pushes up into Jimin’s thigh, seeking more of that delicious grind. It’s been so long since someone else has made him feel like this and it’s making him lightheaded.
“Shit, Yoongi,” Jimin whispers, a slight tremble to his words.
Yoongi doesn’t respond other than arch up into him. His hands must be almost painful on Jimin’s sides by now but Jimin doesn’t seem to mind. He lets Yoongi rub up against his thigh, tensing his muscles as he does so. It makes Yoongi’s breath hitch at the increased intensity.
“Fuck,” Yoongi mutters, momentarily overcome by the sensation.
“Feel good?” Jimin murmurs lowly, and Yoongi nods, even though the answer is obvious. God, he’d almost forgotten how good it could feel being with someone like this.
Yoongi plants his feet into the mattress and lifts his hips, pushing up more into Jimin’s leg. It consequently make his stomach go taut, giving Jimin much greater friction too. A soft moan falls from Jimin’s lips, giving Yoongi a sudden rush of exhilaration from producing such a sound.
Jimin moves himself slightly, positioning himself so that their cocks rub together through the barrier of their underwear. It's not quiet as intense a sensation as grinding against the muscle of Jimin's thigh but fuck, it feels good. He can feel the outline of Jimin's cock against his own and it's sensual on an entirely different level.
"Oh god," Jimin breathes out, voice ending on a whimper.
He rolls his hips down harder, faster, the languid and tentative exploration of before giving way to chasing pleasure in the both of them. Yoongi doesn't protest. Not when he keeps getting such incredible sensations coursing through him. He can feel heat pooling in his lower body already and it's an embarrassingly short space of time but, well, it's really been a while. Even jerking off is a rarity nowadays, let alone something like this.
"Jimin," he gasps out, ready to tell the younger to slow down if he wants to make this last.
His utterance seems to have the opposite effect however. Jimin groans in response, keeps moving his hips deliberate and quick, and Yoongi feels hot all over, aching for more. Jimin's lips attach themselves to Yoongi's neck, sucking on the spot where it meets his shoulder as Yoongi's hands keep their tight grip on Jimin's waist.
"Yoongi, fuck, can I touch you?"
Jimin's words are almost whined out against Yoongi's neck. Yoongi doesn't even stop to think about, just nods furiously.
"Yes, yes, please," he pants, and it makes Jimin groan again.
Jimin pulls back a little and Yoongi almost tugs him straight back down, missing the warmth immediately. But then Jimin's fingers are scrabbling with the waistband of Yoongi's underwear, bringing the material down to his thighs. Yoongi wonders if he should feel more self-conscious having someone else see him naked after so long, but all he can focus on is Jimin.
Jimin pauses a moment, eyes taking in the sight in front of him, before wrapping his hand around Yoongi's length. If Yoongi thought it was amazing before then he has no words to describe how this feels, Jimin's fingers around his cock like this. The heat in the pit of his stomach builds at an alarming rate.
It really doesn't take long. Jimin only manages a few strokes of his hand before that heat reaches its pinnacle. It's all too much; Jimin on top of him, his hand working Yoongi's cock, the way everything feels just so overwhelming in the best way.
"Jimin, I- fuck-"
Yoongi doesn't manage to get much more out before his body tenses, the pressure snapping inside of him. Yoongi's head falls back against the pillow, jaw slack as the most incredible burst of pleasure soars through him. He makes some sort of noise as he comes but he doesn't know what; his mind has gone completely blank, focused only on the pleasure he's experiencing.
"God, you're so hot."
Yoongi's only vaguely aware of the murmured words, but they force him to open his eyes. When he does he lets out a soft moan. Jimin's knelt up, hand shoved into his underwear. Yoongi can see the way it moves beneath the tight fabric, sees the way Jimin's eyelids flutter from the feeling of it. And Yoongi's mind may be fuzzy, but he knows that he wants to see more.
He reaches out with hands that still tremble from the intensity of his orgasm. He grabs onto the waistband of the underwear, tugging it down probably a little too roughly but Jimin doesn't comment on it. Yoongi just stares when he does so.
No one other than Yujin has seen Yoongi naked in years, but similarly Yoongi hasn't seen anyone else either. Well, apart from that time he accidentally walked in on Namjoon, but he'd rather erase that from his memory. It's different to seeing Yujin but it's- well, it's kind of hot too. Very much so.
Jimin's hand works quickly back and forth along his length, brow creasing whenever something seems to feel particularly good. Yoongi feels bad, like he should be doing something more, but it's hard to move when he's so entranced by the man straddling him. He tries nonetheless, lifting his hand tentatively.
Jimin takes hold of it when he spots Yoongi's movements. He places his palm, somewhat sticky, against the back of Yoongi's hand, guiding it to wrap around him. Shit, it's strange, touching someone else like this again. But he lets himself go with it; lets Jimin move his hand for him.
Eventually Jimin takes his own hand away and Yoongi takes over in earnest. He feels too tired, exhaustion in his limbs, to go fast but Jimin seems to like the slower, steadier slide. His head tips back and he looks- Jesus, he looks really sexy, hair falling back as his lips part.
"Like that, Yoongi, fuck," he whispers.
Yoongi does just that. He keeps moving his hand, keeps watching almost awestruck, until Jimin's breathing starts speeding up and the muscles of his toned stomach dip more frequently.
"I'm gonna come, I'm-"
His sentence is replaced mid-way with a low, drawn out groan as he comes. The sticky heat covers Yoongi's fingers and drips down onto his chest as he works Jimin through it. Jimin starts to twitch eventually, oversensitive from Yoongi's touch, and at that point he collapses down onto his back next to the elder.
"Wow," he mutters, and Yoongi kind of enjoys just how dazed he sounds.
"Yeah," Yoongi agrees pointlessly. His mind still isn't quite working properly since he came.
"Yoongi-" Jimin begins, turning his head to face him. Yoongi looks back. "I honestly didn't bring you back here to do that. I mean, I'm glad it happened but I don't want you to think-"
"I know," Yoongi nods, and he does know. Knows how thoughtful Jimin is, how he lets things move at Yoongi's pace. Knows what a great person he is. "I wanted it."
It's strange to admit it but it's true. And it's somehow freeing, allowing himself to recognise just how much he wants Jimin. Unnerving too but- somehow it's something like relief to acknowledge that there a some feelings there, no matter how unexpected.
"Good," Jimin grins. He leans over, pressing a quick kiss to Yoongi's cheek, before adding a quiet, "fuck."
"What is it?" Yoongi asks suddenly concerned.
"I've just realised the towels are all in the bathroom. And the bathroom is down the hallway."
He laughs lightly and Yoongi can't help but join in.
As Yoongi walks back to his hotel in the morning, he feels like a cliché straight out of a fucking movie. His steps feel lighter and everything seems that little bit brighter. It’s not just from being intimate with Jimin, although that was kind of amazing. But from the knowledge that he might just like Jimin a bit more than he thought he would – or more accurately thought he could. He never thought he would have feelings for someone else after Yujin, at least not so soon, but there’s definitely something inside him that is drawn to Jimin. Allowing himself to give into that feels like a big step and it makes him grin to himself despite the hordes of people getting in his way on the walk.
The gruff voice of the man behind the front desk grabs Yoongi’s attention and he swivels round just before he’s about to enter the elevator. He nods in acknowledgement. The man starts saying something in French to which Yoongi just stares at him blankly. He switches to English and that gets much the same reaction but he can understand a few parts here and there. Mainly that he’s being charged for smoking in a non-smoking hotel room.
It’s stupid – Yoongi can tell that he’s not the first occupant to have smoked in there, but perhaps they were sneakier than he was. He left the damn cigarette stubbed out in a glass for gods sake. He curses at himself mentally and doesn’t bother arguing. He’s knows it’s not a challenge he’s likely to win. He goes to get out his credit card but the guy waves his hand.
“You pay tomorrow,” he says, loud and slow. “When you leave.”
His words make Yoongi pause, a horrible sensation coursing through him. Of course. He’s leaving tomorrow. His light mood disappears, a ball of dread settling in his chest instead. Of course it was all to good to be true. He’s finally at a point where he can truly let go and enjoy himself in Paris with Jimin and- and he has to leave. Just his fucking luck. He sighs quietly and heads into the elevator, his steps seeming much heavier than before.
By the time he meets Jimin outside the front of the metro as agreed, he’s feeling decidedly gloomy. Jimin however is his usual cheery self. Maybe even a little cheerier, actually. He greets Yoongi with a quick kiss on his cheek and laughs softly at the startled reaction it draws from Yoongi. His mind instantly whirs back to waking up this morning, Jimin curled into his side and dusting a light kiss or three against Yoongi’s shoulder.
“Come on,” Jimin grins, grabbing his arm and dragging Yoongi in the direction of the Arc de Triomphe.
There are a few more clouds today but it’s still hot and the sky is still a brilliant blue around the white wisps. The view stretches on around them once they reach the top of the monument and Yoongi takes out his camera, beginning to line up some shots. He doesn’t feel quite as excited as he has recently though and he tries not to let it show. Apparently he doesn’t do a very good job.
“You okay?” Jimin asks after he’s taken his obligatory selca. “You seem a little down.”
His eyes flash with obvious concern and he places his hand on Yoongi’s forearm as he studies the elder closely. Yoongi clears his throat and tries to look away, as though something has interested him in the distance.
“I’m fine,” he assures.
Jimin just keeps on staring, clearly worried. “Is this- is this about last night?” he checks quietly. “Do you regret it?”
“No,” Yoongi replies, maybe a tad too quickly. His eyes meet Jimin's. Jimin doesn’t seem convinced. “I’m fine, honestly.”
Yoongi forces a smile and this seems to make Jimin look even less convinced. He decides not to push it however and just gives a nod in response, wandering off to another spot to take some more photos on his phone. Yoongi sighs, turning back towards the scenery. It’s really getting him down that he has so little time left with Jimin and he knows that he should be making the most of it, but the realisation has cast a sour mood over him that he just isn’t able to shake off.
“Hey, could we walk down Champs-Elysee before lunch?” Jimin asks, voice brighter again when he eventually comes back over to Yoongi.
“Sure,” Yoongi shrugs, and he follows Jimin’s lead.
In retrospect, it wasn’t the best idea. The avenue is lined with expensive shops and Jimin wants to stop and stare into the window of what feels like every single one. His face lights up as he looks at the displays, though he doesn’t build up the nerve to actually go into any. They do seem rather intimidating.
“Can you imagine being able to actually afford Gucci?” Jimin sighs wistfully as they walk past yet another store.
It’s not something that’s ever crossed Yoongi’s mind. He really doesn’t see the point in expensive clothes. In his opinion you can’t even tell the difference, and he would never pay ridiculous money just because of some label. Jimin appears to think differently however and is finding this all very aspirational.
“Well, if I’m ever a famous rapper I’ll buy you something from Gucci,” Yoongi tells him. He feels awkward once he says it, from the implication that he would still know Jimin after this trip, but Jimin just beams widely.
“I’ll hold you to that,” he grins. “Though you’d have to buy Tae something too. He’d kill me if I was the only one getting nice clothes.”
“Can’t Jungkook buy them for him?” Yoongi suggests.
“Aish, he doesn’t know a thing about fashion,” Jimin grimaces. “He’s content to live out his days in baggy jeans and oversized white tees.”
“Is that bad?” Yoongi asks. Jimin doesn’t reply, just laughs as though Yoongi’s told a brilliant joke.
They buy some sandwiches once they reach the end of the avenue, eating them in the nearby park. Jimin keeps closing his eyes and tilting his face towards the sun, as though it will somehow help him soak up the rays better. Yoongi keeps glancing over at him every time he does so.
“So, what’s up with you today?” Jimin asks after swallowing his first mouthful of sandwich. “And don’t say you’re fine, you’re clearly not.”
Yoongi chews slowly on his own sandwich, trying to delay answering the question for as long as he can. Jimin’s staring at him intensely and it appears that Yoongi will be unable to get out of giving a response to this. Should he tell Jimin? Yoongi has a feeling that it will make him sound kind of crazy.
“I’m leaving Paris tomorrow,” he says tonelessly. “I have to check out of my hotel in the morning.”
“Ah,” is all Jimin says.
He nods and puts down his sandwich. He looks over at Yoongi, almost a little sadly. He keeps looking at Yoongi, blinking a couple of times before clearing his throat and speaking again.
“Aren’t you excited for Amsterdam?”
“Yeah. Of course,” Yoongi replies, though it doesn’t sound particularly persuasive.
He’s sad about leaving Jimin, especially given how he seems to have developed a certain level of feelings for the younger over the days that they’ve got to know each other. But truthfully, he’s also a little bit terrified of being alone again. Jimin’s company has been a real comfort to him, has brought back the joy into new experiences. Yoongi has a sinking feeling that as soon as he’s alone again all that negativity, all that loneliness, will come flooding back.
Jimin doesn’t say anything, simply keeps watching him. Yoongi feels like he should say something else though he isn’t quite sure what. Jimin looks down, fiddling with a stray thread on his shorts. He wets his lips and looks up at Yoongi.
“I’ll miss having you around.”
Yoongi wasn’t quite expecting that, nor the burst of warmth that blooms in his chest from Jimin’s words. He feels like he’s become attached to Jimin during their time together but Jimin is so carefree and easy going – he didn’t really expect for Jimin to miss him.
“Oh,” Yoongi says.
He suddenly feels bad, because that’s not really the nicest response for Jimin to receive, but he’s kind of at a loss for words. A flurry of thoughts come into his head, some better than others, some he probably shouldn’t voice, but before he can think too much he blurts out,
“Maybe I could stay with you tomorrow night,” he suggests rapidly, words coming out almost in one single breath. “And then we can spend more time together.”
Jimin’s eyes widen in surprise and then he smiles warmly. “Yoongi, I’d love to but-
Yoongi’s heart sinks, ready for the inevitable let down. This is exactly the sort of thing that happens when you get attached to someone, no matter how short a duration. Jimin’s cheeks flush a light pink.
“Well, I’ve kind of already extended my stay here once, and I can’t really afford to change my flights again.”
"Oh," Yoongi says again, sounding just as dumb as the last time he said it. "Why did you change them the first time?"
"Just wanted to see some more of the city."
Jimin looks down at his lap again as he speaks and something in the way he keeps averting his gaze makes Yoongi wonder if he did it to spend longer together. But that's ridiculous.
"Maybe I could come with you to Spain instead," Yoongi tries.
It's somehow like the realisation that he won't have Jimin by his side tomorrow is truly starting to sink in. It makes Yoongi say unexpected things. He can't help it. He feels the panic rising within him.
"Yoongi," he sighs, but it's not in annoyance. "Why would you do that? You want to see Amsterdam, and all those other places I'm not heading to."
Yoongi wets his lips and feels his own cheeks start to heat up. He fiddles with the sandwich wrapper between his thumb and forefinger, feeling incredibly stupid all of a sudden. How did it get to this point, where he's so scared of his own company. It's pathetic.
"I hated it here before- well, you know," he shrugs.
Jimin's face looks both sad and a little pained. He reaches out, resting his palm on Yoongi's knee. Yoongi stares down and it but doesn't flinch, almost enjoying the touch. If only it didn't seem to come with such pity. Jimin takes a few moments before he says anything more, clearly mulling things over.
"I'd love to travel more with you," he declares after a while. He shrugs lightly. "It's just- I dunno." He breaks off, taking a slow breath in. "You're funny and kind of sweet and well, I can't really explain. I like spending time with you. Even if you can be a bit-" He waves his hand in a large circle in front of him in Yoongi's direction, as though indicating how moody the elder can be. "Y'know."
He lets out a small laugh, showing that he doesn't mean it harshly. Yoongi knows he's right though; he's not exactly been the perfect travel companion. He's a bit in shock from the other things Jimin has said though; that Jimin thinks such things of him. Jimin pauses a few notes before continuing, thumb rubbing lightly against Yoongi's knee.
"You're clearly still hurting from before though. I think some time alone would be good for you. You don't need me as a crutch."
"This isn't some rebound thing," Yoongi corrects him immediately, not wanting Jimin to think that he's being used. "I just- I don't know, I like being around you too. I like you."
Yoongi feels the heat rising in his own cheeks from his confession, but the panic is making his tongue a lot looser than usual. He feels somewhat embarrassed but the feeling fades when he sees the way that Jimin smiles, eyes crescenting wonderfully as he does so.
"Thank you," he says, warm and soft. "But I still think you should do this alone. Follow what you want to do for a change. I get the feeling that isn't something you do very often."
A silence settles over them and Yoongi isn't quite sure what to say. He thinks that Jimin's conclusion is too simplistic but he says it with such kindness that Yoongi doesn't respond. He pictures the road ahead of him, lonely and open. The Netherlands, Germany, Austria, Italy, Greece, Turkey. It seems incredibly daunting. He lets the quiet linger until Jimin eventually speaks again.
"I'd like to keep in touch though," he suggests almost timidly. "I mean, Daegu isn't so far from Seoul."
"I'd like that too," Yoongi replies far too quickly. It makes Jimin's smile widen even more and Yoongi feels an odd flutter deep within his chest.
"Cool," Jimin grins, and squeezes his knee, making Yoongi jolt. Jimin laughs.
Yoongi doesn’t quite know what to do so takes a large bite of his sandwich. He’s chewing on the mouthful when Jimin starts speaking again.
“Can we agree to make the most of today then?” he asks and Yoongi nods slowly, unable to speak around the bread cloying his mouth.
There is the faintest trickle of something like relief that runs through him. The idea of doing the rest of these travels alone still seems terrifying but the thought that once he gets home Jimin may still be around- it gives a strange new lightness to Yoongi’s mood. His phone buzzes and he takes it out, glad of the distraction from the way Jimin’s smiling so brightly at him.
“Shit, I forgot, it’s Namjoon’s date tonight,” Yoongi says, deciding against reading the messages aloud.
Oh my god
Check this shit out
The next message that comes through is a photo of the Seoul skyline, the faint outline of a restaurant scene reflected back against the glass. He can see that the seat opposite Namjoon is empty, Seokjin probably using the bathroom.
“Going well?” Jimin asks, as always looking genuinely interested.
“I’d say so,” Yoongi smiles, holding his phone up to show Jimin the photo. Jimin whistles lowly in response.
Are you his sugar baby now?
I’ll be whatever the fuck he wants me to be
I think I’m in love
Yoongi chuckles down at the phone screen and types out a quick reply.
I think we knew that 6 months ago
Have a great time and let me know how it goes
Just not in too much detail
You’re getting ALL the detail
“Have you ever eaten somewhere super fancy like that?” Jimin asks curiously.
“Nah,” Yoongi shrugs. “My family never had a lot of money and my friends- well, my friend is Namjoon.”
He chuckles lightly. Yoongi can tell that Jimin seems to want to say something, but is holding back. There’s a short pause before he answers.
“Fair enough,” he smiles. “I never have either. But it’s on my bucket list.”
“Your bucket list?”
“Yeah, a list of things I want to do before I die,” Jimin explains.
“I am not going to be lectured about being negative by you of all people,” Jimin huffs, though his eyes still sparkle happily. There’s a gap as Yoongi nods and takes another bite of his sandwich. Jimin seems to be debating something before he speaks again.
“Hey,” he says with a grin. “Want to know what else is on my list?”
“Shouldn’t this be the other way around,” Yoongi whispers nervously as his back makes contact with the tree trunk.
“Stop worrying,” Jimin tells him, eyes alight with mischief as he unbuttons Yoongi’s shorts and tugs them down to his ankles along with his underwear.
“Shit, give me some warning!” Yoongi squeaks out, not liking quite how high pitched his voice goes.
Jimin just laughs, leaning in and pressing his lips to Yoongi’s. He kisses him quick and playful, and it does nothing to stop the hammering of Yoongi’s heart. He can’t believe that’s he’s half naked in the middle of a fucking park in Paris. God, he’s going to get arrested; he’s going to be deported back to Korea and have to explain to everyone how very sorry he is, but he couldn’t refuse a certain handsome man’s request to give him a blowjob in public.
“We’re hidden enough here,” Jimin says, trailing his lips along Yoongi’s jaw instead. True, it is very secluded in this corner of the park, but still-
Whatever protestation had entered Yoongi’s mind rapidly dissolves when he sees Jimin dropping to his knees in front of him, hands rubbing soothingly over his thighs.
“Fuck,” Yoongi gulps quietly, his legs already shaking way too much just from the anticipation of it all. And the fear, of course.
Jimin’s nose nudges against his hip and he nips lightly at the skin there. “Relax, Yoongi,” he says lowly, looking up at Yoongi through his eyelashes in a way that makes the elder’s head spin. “Just enjoy it.”
Yoongi can’t look down at him any longer, the sight making his cock throb far too strongly when he hasn’t even done anything yet. He tips his head back against the tree trunk, eyes closing as he tries to slow down his breathing.
Jimin seems to take this as his cue to proceed because the next thing Yoongi feels is the smooth, wet glide of Jimin’s tongue along his length, and he’s gone. Jimin makes a small, happy hum after his first taste and Yoongi has to keep his eyes firmly scrunched closed lest this is all over too fast. He feels Jimin’s hand slide over his own, linking their fingers loosely as he moves their joined hands to his hair.
Jimin removes his hand and Yoongi takes the hint, gripping lightly in the soft strands. Jimin’s breath flutters warm and teasing over the head of Yoongi’s cock before suddenly his lips are around him, slowly sinking down and engulfing Yoongi in that incredible velvety heat.
“Oh my god,” Yoongi exhales sharply, fingers tangling a little harder in Jimin’s hair.
Jimin makes another little happy noise as he pulls back, tongue swirling around the tip before he starts to set up a fairly fast pace, his lips dragging messy and wet up and down on Yoongi’s cock. Yoongi tends to like it slower than this but he kind of loves this right now. The added elements of possibly being caught and the fact that it’s Jimin and the way that Jimin’s mouth moves just so expertly makes Yoongi feel all loose limbed and like his insides have turned to liquid.
Yoongi braves opening his eyes, and it’s both the best and worst decision. Worst because he suddenly feels like he’s getting close to the edge way too quickly. Best because fuck, Jimin looks amazing. Yoongi just stares, entranced by the way that Jimin’s mouth slides along him, taking his length easily and looking like there’s nothing else he’d rather be doing right now.
Jimin’s eyes open and he catches Yoongi’s gaze, winking cheekily up at him. Yoongi can only keep staring, jaw slack as he watches the way Jimin pulls away, pressing hot, open mouthed kisses along him before taking his cock back into his mouth again, lips red and slick with pre come.
It really doesn’t take long at all before Yoongi can feel that curl of heavy heat tightening and tightening in the pit of his stomach. He grips Jimin’s hair harder, whispering Jimin’s name repeatedly. It’s too much, too good.
“Jimin, I’m gonna come,” Yoongi whimpers, the pleasure getting more and more intense with every pull of Jimin’s lips.
He expects Jimin to move away but he simply continues with a renewed eagerness, moaning softly around him. It’s enough to send Yoongi toppling over the edge, his orgasm crashing through him. He lifts a hand to cover his mouth, muffling the loud groan that escapes him as he comes in Jimin’s mouth, the force of it leaving him trembling and his breath coming out in harsh, ragged bursts.
Jimin stands up, wincing a little at the apparent ache in his knees. He tugs Yoongi’s shorts and underwear back up, tucking him carefully back in before capturing Yoongi’s mouth in long, deep kiss completely at odds with the almost frantic pace of a few moments ago. Jimin’s tongue curves languidly around Yoongi’s, the elder tasting himself on him. Yoongi keeps his hand in Jimin’s hair, his other one, resting on the side of Jimin’s neck as they get lost in the wonderful, slow tenderness of the kiss.
“I still can’t believe we did that.”
Yoongi smiles sheepishly to himself as they walk along the bank of the Seine. He feels full from the cheap but delicious dinner they’ve just eaten, happy from both Jimin’s company and the shared bottle of wine. Thoughts of tomorrow seem almost bearable, though Yoongi’s sure that will change when he wakes up in the morning.
“It was fun, right?” Jimin grins.
“Yeah, it was,” Yoongi admits, smile getting bigger. “Though I feel bad that it was kind of one-sided.”
“Well, the night is still young,” Jimin states, wiggling his eyebrows in a way intended to be sexy but simply makes Yoongi laugh. Jimin nudges against his shoulder before casually slipping his hand into Yoongi’s. Yoongi tenses just a little before gripping back lightly.
“So what else is on this list?” Yoongi asks, keen for something to take his mind off of quite how warm Jimin’s small hand feels in his own.
“It’s pretty extensive,” Jimin grins. “Maybe I’ll show you the full list one day.”
Yoongi grins back before looking down, watching his feet taking their lazy steps. He tries not to think about the phrase one day and how it implies that they will meet up again.
At some point Jimin seems to tire of walking and tugs gently on Yoongi’s hand, pulling him down to sit on a bench facing the river. Yoongi sits next to him, unable to ignore the way that Jimin’s hand stays in his. Jimin pulls both of them into his lap, entwined fingers resting on his thigh. They both stare out at the river, neither keen to say anything and break the comfortable quiet. Jimin shifts closer, leaning his head on Yoongi’s shoulder, and Yoongi’s breath hitches at the action.
“Can’t believe it’s my last night here already,” Jimin says softly.
Yoongi doesn’t quite know what to say to that. He’s still trying desperately not to focus on that fact. He can’t quite get his head around the fact that tomorrow Jimin will be on a plane heading south and he’ll be boarding a train heading north. He doesn’t say anything in the end, just rests his cheek against the top of Jimin’s head and squeezes his hand lightly.
Once they’re back in Jimin’s hotel room everything seems a lot slower than previously, both of them taking their time. They spend an unknown number of minutes simply getting lost in deep, lingering kisses, tongues sliding smooth and wet together within the heat of their mouths. Clothes come off one by one, items dropping to the floor smoothly.
Yoongi still feels a little tentative about it; about reaching out and touching Jimin, about tracing his fingertips along the inviting ridges and dips of his chest, along the curve of his arms. The want to do so is clear, but it is going to take some time to get used to feeling someone beneath his fingers that isn’t Yujin. It’s new but it’s nice, so fucking nice, and Yoongi tries his best to go with his thoughts.
When Jimin’s hand wraps around him Yoongi can’t help but want to return the action. He takes Jimin’s cock in his hand with far greater confidence than he did last night. They both lay on their sides, Yoongi’s leg flung over Jimin’s thighs as they kiss, a little sloppy but it doesn’t matter. Not when Jimin’s fingers work his length so amazingly and not when Yoongi can feel the pulsing, hard heat of Jimin’s cock in his own grip.
Compared to the intense rush Yoongi experienced in the park today, this time Jimin draws his orgasm out of him slowly. Jimin brings him constantly to the edge and back again before eventually giving in, stroking him through it slow and steady as Yoongi feels that wave of pleasure trickle into every inch of him and for a moment he feels like he’s never going to stop coming.
They both lay in easy silence afterwards, Yoongi not quite able to shake the image of Jimin coming out of his mind; the way his eyebrows knitted together and lips parted as he breathed out Yoongi’s name. He’s eventually distracted by the vibration of his phone, a recap of Namjoon’s date with Seokijn coming through.
It was THE MOST perfect date ever
He said that apparently he’d had a crush on me since the office Christmas party?!
He said I looked cute in the antlers
Dude needs his eyesight checked
Seriously though – happy it went well
And thanks for sparing me any gory details
I was just getting to that
Dick game is INSANE
I don’t know how I’m still alive
Seriously not the image I need right now
Please never mention Seokjin’s dick again
I already know way too much about it
Anyone keeping your bed warm over there
A nice French boy maybe? ;)
Yoongi grins a little, Namjoon inadvertently reminding him of Taehyung and Jeongguk’s eagerness to hear some scandalous vacation stories from Jimin. Yoongi’s not usually one for sharing much of his private life, but he feels- kind of happy and easy right now. From spending time with Jimin, from the post orgasm haze, and from Namjoon’s excitement too. He gives in.
Well, he’s not French…
How was it?
A gentleman never tells
And you are not a gentleman
Yoongi decides to leave him hanging.
“Seriously, someone’s keen to talk to you,” Jimin mumbles sleepily as Yoongi’s phone buzzes relentlessly.
Jimin’s buried in the covers, face pressed into the pillow. Yoongi switches his phone to silent, smile still on his face, and places it on the bedside unit. He shuffles down on the bed, and Jimin drowsily curls into his side. Yoongi’s not sure when he stops smiling and when exactly he falls asleep.
Yoongi couldn’t say what the time is when he next stirs, but the way the sky looks inky black through the thin curtains makes him think that it’s still the very early hours of the morning. He’s unsure at first as to what’s woken him up before he feels the gentle kisses being pressed along his shoulder.
“Sorry, did I wake you,” Jimin says in a way that implies waking Yoongi up was entirely his intention.
Yoongi doesn’t get a real chance to answer because the next thing he knows Jimin’s mouth is over his, tongue swiping at his lips before sliding past to meet his own. The pace is a little faster now, a little needier, as Jimin climbs on top of him, body draping over Yoongi’s easily.
Yoongi’s hands find their way to the curve of Jimin’s spine, trailing down its length before rubbing over his shoulderblades. The kisses soon become heavier, messier, and Yoongi even dares to slide his hands down to Jimin’s ass, squeezing lightly and pulling him tighter against his body. Jimin gasps softly into the kiss before a low noise of approval rumbles from his throat.
Yoongi isn’t quite sure where this is heading but is content to let Jimin take the lead once again, happily becoming lost in the way that their bodies grind together, seeking out the solid heat of each other.
“Yoongi,” he breathes out, lips dropping to the elder’s neck. “What do you like?”
“What?” Yoongi whispers stupidly.
“Like, top or bottom, what do you prefer?” he says, quiet and urgent.
"Oh, uh, I-I don’t mind,” Yoongi tells him, stuttering slightly.
Jimin lifts his head at that, looking down at Yoongi with an expression of concern. He leans back down, bringing their lips together in a far sweeter kiss. He swallows thickly and Yoongi watches the bob of his throat as he does so.
“Sorry,” he whispers, looking thoroughly guilty. “Is this too much?”
Yoongi pauses and blinks. Is it too much? There’s a part of him that says yes; that hand jobs and blowjobs are one thing, but sex is a different level entirely. That the idea of sex with anyone who isn’t Yujin is strange and wrong still.
But there’s another part but can’t help but notice the kindness, the affection that Jimin has shown him. The connection that they've formed even in their short time together. Can’t help but notice the unfurling heat in his stomach, the deep urge to feel Jimin in such an intimate way.
Can’t help but realise how crazy this all is but how- good it feels. Like it's right, somehow.
“It’s not too much,” he whispers back, almost inaudible.
Jimin keeps looking down at him, hand lifting to stroke against Yoongi's cheek.
"Don't feel like you have to say that," he says gently. "If you don't want to, it's fine. It wouldn't change how I feel."
There's a part of Yoongi that wants to know in great detail exactly how Jimin feels, but he doesn't ask. Instead he simply says,
"I want to."
"Yes," Yoongi states softly before adding, "please."
Jimin keeps staring a little while longer before leaning down and capturing Yoongi's lips in an oddly chaste kiss. Yoongi slides one hand up into his hair, tilting his head and deepening it just enough.
His heart is thumping when Jimin gets the small bottle of lube out of his suitcase. It's been a while since he's topped, way back before Yujin. It's something he thinks he could definitely get used to again though. Especially when Jimin leans back on one elbow, legs spreading and head tipping back as he carefully starts to prepare himself.
Yoongi thinks he might actually be gaping as he watches the scene in front of him. Jimin's lips are tugged up into the tiniest of smirks as he fingers himself, slow and deliberate. The smirk occasionally disappears whenever Jimin gasps softly or bites down on his lip to hold back a moan. Yoongi thinks it might possibly be one of the hottest things he's ever seen.
At least that is until he's laid on his back, watching as Jimin slowly sinks down onto his cock. He can't tear his eyes away from the way it disappears inside the younger. Jimin wets his lips once Yoongi's fully buried inside. He takes a few moments to adjust and Yoongi feels like his heart could leap out of his chest at any moment. Jimin then smiles, hot and sweet and wonderful, and Yoongi digs his fingers into Jimin's thighs to calm himself down.
When Jimin starts rolling his hips it's pure fucking bliss. Thoughts of anyone other than Jimin fade away, Yoongi able to focus only on him and the way he moves, the way he looks, the way he feels.
Jimin's words are whimpered and Yoongi's feeling dizzy. He tries to take it all in; the flex of Jimin's thighs as he rides him, deep and hard; the curve of his biceps as he braces himself against Yoongi's chest; the flutter of his eyelids when something feels particularly good.
Yoongi's body is thrumming intensely with pleasure, every fibre simmering with heat, with desire. Everything else they've done so far has been great, of course, but this is simply incredible. Jimin is so tight and hot around him, but more than that- it's the intimacy that is mindblowing to Yoongi.
"God, Jimin, you feel-"
Yoongi's whispered sentence is cut short when Jimin rocks his hips in exactly the right way. His moan matches Jimin's at the feeling. Jimin's eyes meet his own, full of passion and need, and Yoongi can't look away, simply gasps out Jimin's name as the younger rides him harder.
Yoongi feels molten, like he just wants to sink deeper and deeper into the sensations, but does his best to help Jimin out. His holds onto Jimin's hips, guiding his movements, and at some point he plants his feet more firmly into the mattress, lifting up to meet Jimin's movements.
"God yes, right there," Jimin sighs breathlessly.
Yoongi can only groan in response and do as requested. Jimin falls forward, handing the control over to Yoongi for these few moments. Their mouths press together but neither can kiss properly, just sort of breathe each other in.
Jimin comes first, burying his face into Yoongi's shoulder as he fists his cock in time with Yoongi's thrusts. He moans low and long as he does so, the sound rumbling against Yoongi's neck as he feels a warm stickiness seep over his chest.
It really doesn't take much after that. A few deep thrusts and suddenly an intense wave of utter pleasure soars through Yoongi. He grips onto Jimin's hip as he comes, face pressed into Jimin's hair.
Yoongi feels like he's on a high, body light and mind relaxed. Once Jimin sits up he smiles at Yoongi, so warm and so open, and Yoongi feels- he feels.
Jimin falls asleep curled into him once more and it's only then that Yoongi notices the first hint of sunlight edging out the dark of the night.
It's almost time to leave.
“You’re gonna send me plenty of photos right?” Jimin asks. “I’ve heard there’s some crazy red light district there.”
“I am not taking pictures in the red light district.”
Jimin sighs heavily in jest, nudging his elbow against Yoongi’s side. He slumps back on the bench, stretching his legs out in front of him and reaching his arms up. Yoongi tries not to stare too obviously at the slither of stomach on show momentarily as his t shirt rises up. Jimin yawns widely.
“This coffee is doing nothing to wake me up,” Jimin complains, picking up the cardboard cup and taking another sip of it anyway. “Totally blaming you for this – keeping me up all night.”
He grins mischievously before taking one more gulp of coffee. Yoongi flushes a little and looks down at his lap. In the clear light of morning he’s not quite so forward as he was last night. It was truly amazing, as was waking up with Jimin wrapped around him once again. Yoongi’s flush turns a bit deeper at the memory.
“Hey, you are okay about what happened last night, right?” Jimin checks cautiously, placing hand on Yoongi’s forearm in concern. His voice goes even softer when he continues. “I know that was probably a big thing for you.”
“You better not be talking about your penis,” Yoongi says, trying his best to diffuse the awkwardness of the conversation. He feels terrible that he makes Jimin worry so much.
Jimin bursts out laughing at this, hand squeezing Yoongi’s arm tightly as he uses his other hand to cover his mouth, hiding his wide smile. Yoongi wishes that he wouldn’t; he kind of really likes seeing Jimin’s smile.
“No, I’m not talking about my penis,” he grins. The laughter dies down to something quieter and the expression of concern returns. “I just want to make sure that I didn’t push you into anything if you weren’t ready after your- well, after that guy.”
Yoongi shakes his head, looking down at his lap. He had been worried that it was too fast, too much, sure, but more than that- he felt ready. That easily overrode any lingering doubt.
“Yujin isn’t part of my life any more,” Yoongi sighs quietly. “I need to move on.”
He clears his throat, tapping his finger against the lid of his own coffee cup. He swallows thickly and looks up, meeting Jimin’s gaze.
“I want to move on,” he says softly. “I really want to.”
And he genuinely means it. Jimin smiles almost tenderly at him, reaching out and covering Yoongi’s hand with his palm. He laces their fingers together loosely and he nods, as though he’s mulling over Yoongi’s words. Eventually he gives a firmer nod and grips Yoongi’s hand a bit tighter.
“Okay, good,” he smiles. “I’m glad.”
They sit like that in silence for a while, the bustle of the Gare du Nord continuing around them. Yoongi’s eyes rest on the departures board, seeing the train marked Amsterdam Centraal moving higher and higher up the list. It takes until the time shows twenty minutes to departure before Yoongi gathers up the nerve to speak.
“So, you know you said before, Daegu and Seoul aren’t so far away,” Yoongi begins hesitantly.
He waits for Jimin to say something but the other stays quiet. It draws Yoongi’s attention up. Jimin’s looking at him, eyes shimmering with warmth. He looks expectant, almost like he knows what Yoongi’s going to say. He seems keen this time, however, to let Yoongi take the lead and move things forward. Yoongi wets his lips nervously.
“Like, it’s not even two hours on the train,” Yoongi continues. “Maybe when we’re home we could- maybe see each other again?”
Yoongi feels like his heart is racing just from his words. He almost wants to drop his gaze but he keeps his eyes trained on Jimin. Takes in the way that his lips pull back into a bright smile, irises sparkling.
“I’d like that,” he says, still smiling. “I kind of feel like maybe we have something.” He shrugs, squeezing Yoongi’s hand again. “I dunno, but I’d like to find out where that could go. If that’s okay with you.”
“That’s okay with me,” Yoongi smiles, chest feeling tight and stomach swirling with excitement and anticipation.
This time it’s Yoongi who leans in, his lips touching gently to Jimin’s. He can feel Jimin’s smile against him, and he wonders if Jimin can feel his too. The tip of his tongue darts out tentatively and Jimin’s parts his mouth easily, his tongue meeting Yoongi’s for a sweet, slow kiss. Yoongi feels Jimin’s free hand cup his jaw gently as the other stays linked with Yoongi’s hand.
They stay like that until Yoongi has to start making his way to the train platform, losing themselves in long, lingering kisses sat on the uncomfortable bench. Yoongi wishes that he’d let himself give into this earlier, so that they could have spent more time together like this in Paris. The thought of meeting up back in Korea, however, gives him a small boost that counters the negativity.
Jimin leaves him at the ticket barrier, giving Yoongi a huge hug, not letting him go when Yoongi starts struggling. He laughs lightly, squeezing tighter before finally allowing Yoongi to escape.
“I’ll see you soon, okay?” he smiles.
Yoongi nods. Soon might be pushing it a bit; there’s a good many weeks in between now and when they return to Korea. He doesn’t say that though.
“See you soon,” he echoes.
He gives Jimin one last look before turning and walking through the barrier, trying to commit his face to memory. At least he has that photo on his phone. He’s half way down the platform when he hears a yelled “Bon Voyage!” that makes him spin round. Jimin waves wildly and blows him a kiss. Yoongi blushes, but he can’t help but smile too as he waves back.
Yoongi stares out of the window, watching the people passing by on the street below. The chatter of the pedestrians is muted by the window, the dinging of bells on the many bicycles similarly silenced. Yoongi clutches the bottle of beer in his hand, taking a long sip before moving away from the window and sitting down on the edge of his bed.
He feels lonely. He’s felt it since his train pulled away from the station in Paris. Despite the busyness of the streets in Amsterdam, he feels very much alone. He looks around his empty room, sighing softly and taking another sip of his beer.
Yes, he’s lonely. It’s different somehow though. It’s no longer crushing, suffocating, something that he can’t escape from. Instead it’s a low, softer feeling; a little melancholy, but with the knowledge that perhaps there is some light ahead.
Yoongi almost wants to rush through the rest of his trip. Get it over and done with, so that he can go back to Daegu and start planning when he could visit Seoul and see Jimin. But he knows that goes entirely against Jimin’s reasoning for him doing the trip alone. Jimin wants him to enjoy seeing these things, to enjoy the experience of being in a foreign country, the thrill of travelling. Yoongi thinks that Jimin might have too much faith in him though; he is still struggling to contemplate the idea of all those days alone stretching ahead of him.
Yoongi takes out his phone and snaps a photo of the beer – an Amstel - in his hand and sends it to Namjoon with the caption trying the local cuisine. He knows that Namjoon likely won’t see it until the morning but it’s something. He feels bad for leaving Namjoon hanging over the identity of his bedtime companion last night.
He wants to message Jimin but that’s probably a bit too needy, he supposes. Although Jimin isn’t really the sort of person to care. Yoongi takes another long swig of his beer before giving in and sending the same photo with the same caption to Jimin. About forty minutes pass before Yoongi gets a response.
Sampling the local cuisine too
His own picture is of a glass of red wine, held up in front of a beach scene. Yoongi smiles at it, tinged with a little sadness. He doesn’t send anything back. Knowing Jimin he’s probably already made some friends despite the language barrier. It makes something twist unpleasantly in Yoongi’s stomach.
He flops back onto the bed and rests the beer bottle on his chest, revolving it slowly. He watches the glass idly as it turns in his hand. He knows that he should probably get up, get out, explore some of the city. But he lacks the energy, the motivation. He remembers Namjoon suggesting that he book into hostels rather than hotels in order to meet other travellers, but the idea of being surrounded constantly by other people seemed horrendous. Still does.
Yoongi glances over at the clock. Only 9pm. He downs the rest of his beer and gets into bed anyway, switching off the lights. It’s a good few hours, however, until he eventually manages to fall asleep.
When he wakes the next morning his mood feels the slightest bit brighter. He’s passed the first hurdle of a night alone. He showers and gets dressed slowly and without great enthusiasm, blinking in the harsh sunlight as he steps outside. He takes out a map that was given to him at the front desk, scanning his eyes over the paper and working out a route for the day.
He wanders around the streets for most of the morning without much purpose. He snaps a photo of a building or a quaint scene here and there. Yoongi must admit that it’s a very picturesque city, different to Paris but rather lovely all the same.
It’s lunch time when his phone buzzes with a message from Jimin. Yoongi’s sitting by a canal, eating a huge portion of fries and mayonnaise and getting it everywhere. He licks the sauce off of his fingers and wipes them on the leg of his shorts before picking up the phone.
Hey so I found this online
Might be good if you need something to do tonight
Yoongi opens the link. It’s some sort of meet up group. There’s an event tonight, a Korean language exchange type thing for people to learn the language, but also to see some different spots in the city. It all sounds a bit overwhelming to be honest, but Yoongi doesn’t want to let Jimin feel like he’s made a wasted effort. Something about the fact that Jimin’s spent time searching for something for Yoongi to do in Amsterdam all the way from Barcelona makes his chest clench tightly.
Thanks, I’ll maybe check that out
How is Spain?
He gets the full update on Barcelona, complete with plenty of excited sentences and a bombardment of photos. He grins down at his phone, trying to let his happiness at chatting with Jimin override the pang of sadness he feels from not being at his side to experience it with him. He misses that enthusiasm he felt seeing the sights with Jimin.
Yoongi spends the rest of his day still wandering, taking in a museum en route. He remembers walking around the Louvre, seeing Jimin taking those selcas and getting whacked in the head by him. He never would have thought that day that things would have led where they did. He stares at the artwork on the walls, not really taking it in but trying his best to appreciate it. Tries his best to focus on the colours, the brushstrokes, the moods of the paintings. He’s not sure that he does a great job.
Evening finds Yoongi sitting in his bedroom once again, staring around him at the four stark walls. It’s much cleaner in here, but bare and devoid of any character. He almost misses the grotty hotel room in Paris. Almost.
He sighs and looks at the bottles of beer on the small desk in the room, a four pack he bought for himself. He debates about opening one but doesn’t really feel like it. He picks up his phone, scrolling absently through different social media sites. He re-reads his conversation with Namjoon from earlier today, in which he relented and told him about Jimin. Told him pretty much everything really. Namjoon seemed super excited for him, leaving a nice glow within Yoongi, but making him miss Jimin’s presence that much more.
Yoongi glances over at the clock. 7pm. He looks at his message from Jimin earlier, the link to the event sitting in there. He’d added himself to the group and marked himself as attending earlier, but knowing that he’d probably just end up cancelling. He taps his fingers anxiously against his thighs. He looks over at the clock again.
8pm finds him hovering outside the door of the café where the group is meeting. He peers inside. It’s a relaxed setting, and he spies a cluster of people that he thinks may be from the group sitting around a table. There’s not as many as he thought, only six or seven people, and it seems a little less daunting than he’d imagined. Still, going inside seems rather terrifying.
“Hey, are you going to the meet up too?”
It takes a moment for Yoongi to register that the words are spoken in Korean rather than Dutch. He turns around to see two girls standing there, smiling at him. He panics. This is chance, his moment to say no and turn around, go back to his hotel room. They keep looking at him expectantly.
“Uh, yes,” he says, surprising himself.
“Okay great,” one of them says. “We’re heading in too.”
They walk inside, Yoongi following them awkwardly. His heart is racing and his hands suddenly feel clammy. A younger version of Yoongi would be shaking his head in disappointment right now; he’s certain he never used to be so terribly unconfident.
“Is this your first time here?” the same girl asks as they take a seat, the group giving waves and greetings of welcome.
“Yes, first time to this,” Yoongi says. “And to Amsterdam.”
“Oh cool,” she says. “It’s Jiyeun’s first time here too.”
The other girl gives a shy nod of hello and Yoongi smiles back, hoping that he doesn’t look too weird. The first girl explains further. “I’m at university here on an exchange program. Jiyeun still lives back home but wanted to come out and see a bit of Europe during her summer break.”
“Are you travelling too? Jiyeun asks, her voice a lot softer and less confident than the other’s.
Yoongi tells them a little about his time in Paris and about his future travel plans. They both listen avidly, exclaiming in excitement as he tells them about the sights he saw in Paris. He finds out that they’re sisters, learns about what they’re studying in school, and he gets a huge list of tips of places to see while he’s in Amsterdam.
They’re both easy to talk to and the familiarity of home that they bring makes him feel just a little more relaxed. Eventually some others in the group start to join in the conversation. Yoongi discovers that one of the others is from Daegu too so they talk about that for a while, shared places and memories of their home town. There are a couple of people in the group that don’t speak Korean but are learning, so occasionally join in, and sometimes the first of the sisters – Minji, he discovers – talks back to them in English.
At some point a few of the group suggest heading onto some bars. Yoongi wonders momentarily if he should use this as his opportunity to escape, but somehow the urge to do so has lessened. He thinks that Namjoon would be proud of him as he makes his way to a bar with the others. Jimin might just be too. It gives Yoongi a kind of soft, warm feeling, though that might just be the alcohol.
He takes a few people’s numbers before the end of the night; the two sisters, the guy from Daegu, and another guy he was talking to at some point about underground rap. There’s promises to meet up again before Yoongi departs. Yoongi’s not sure how serious any of them are but it still gives him a buzz to make such connections, even if briefly.
When he wakes up the next morning it’s to a photo Jimin from Jimin. Someone’s obviously taken it for him, because he can see all of Jimin in it. He’s crouched on a beach, smiling, fingers making a peace sign as he squats next to some writing in the sand. The characters read hi Yoongi.
It takes a long time for the smile to fade from his lips.
It’s his last day in Amsterdam when Yoongi gets the message that make him feel as though his heart actually stops for a moment. He blinks down at his phone screen, wondering if the sunlight is obscuring it and making him see things that aren't there. He lifts his hand up, creating some shade. Nope, he's definitely reading it right.
You have one new message from Yujin
Despite the heat and the blazing sun, Yoongi goes cold. His hand actually starts to tremble, terrified of opening the message. It’s been so long since they’ve had any contact, not since Yoongi moved out of their apartment after Yujin finished things. Even then it was simply a brief goodbye. Yujin had appeared completely devoid of emotion whilst Yoongi was struggling not to let too many tears fall. He hadn’t understood, and still doesn’t. How can you just stop loving someone like that? He thought that what they had was forever, but apparently it wasn’t a thought Yujin shared. He’d found someone else to have that with.
The conversation carries on next to him. He’s having a picnic lunch in the park with Minji and Jiyeun, the pair of them keen to see him again before he leaves. They’d met up once more since that first night, a dinner followed by a very bizarre drunken trip to the sex museum. He’d sent some hilarious photos to Jimin that night and he had revelled in the humorous reactions he got from he younger. He knows that if he was more sober he would have died sending such things but he’s kind of glad that he did if it made Jimin smile at least. He even sent one to Namjoon, suggesting an historical dildo as a present for Seokjin.
“Everything okay?” Jiyeun asks, Yoongi's expression clearly giving away his anguish at receiving the notification.
He nods and attempts a smile, his heart thumping loudly in his chest all the while. He sees the pair of them exchange a look before continuing their conversation, not pressing any further. He’s not told them about Yujin, or about Jimin. He’s not one for telling people about those matters personal to him. Jimin had proved a rare exception to that.
With shaking fingers he unlocks his phone and opens the message.
Yoongi feels like he’s going to be sick from the flood of emotions suddenly swirling within him. He feels an almost forgotten guilt rise up for spending time with Jimin. He feels upset from the contact so out of the blue. He feels nervous of what it means and disgusted at the tiny glimmer of hope he feels for wondering if Yujin wants to start things up again.
Yoongi panics. He wants so badly to talk this through with Namjoon, someone with a clear and rational mind. But it’s the early hours of the morning in Seoul, and he can’t disturb him when he has work in the morning. Yoongi’s mind flits to Jimin but no, that’s ridiculous. He dismisses it as soon as it crosses his thoughts.
Once his mind goes to Jimin, he struggles to tear it away. He thinks of how wonderful his time with Jimin was. How kind, and funny, and amazing Jimin was. How patient and caring and, well, maybe how gorgeous he was too. How Yoongi felt around him, happy and content.
He continues to stare down at the phone screen. He realises that, sure, it's too late to message Namjoon. Which similarly means that Yujin's texting him in the early hours of the morning. He feels stupidly scared as he types out a response.
Are you drunk?
can’t I miss my baby without being drunk
Yoongi doesn’t know what to do. He’s pretty sure that Yujin is, in fact, drunk; that’s when the pet names always used to come out. He’s also pretty sure that this other guy gets called that too. Yoongi randomly wonders if Jimin likes pet names or not.
I don’t think your new boyfriend would be happy about that
Why don’t you come over?
I miss your cute little face
Cute little body
Yoongi feels like something’s caught in his throat. Yujin’s definitely drunk. It doesn’t excuse what he’s writing though; as far as Yoongi can tell, he’s after some sort of hook up while the new boyfriend is away. Yoongi feels sick; did this use to happen when they were still together? Did he text that other guy like this whenever Yoongi was away. Yoongi doesn’t even want to consider it.
Yoongi re-reads the message and the bile in his throat feels hotter, more cloying. He always used to complain about Yujin referring to him as cute and little in that way. Sure it could be sweet sometimes, but often Yoongi felt like it was used as a way to emasculate him somehow. Make him seem weaker. But Yoongi’s a loyal person; he would never give up on someone for a few faults.
He wonders, however, if maybe he should. He looks up at Minji and Jiyeun, whose conversation has now ceased. They’re both looking at him, concern creasing their features.
“Are you sure you’re okay?” Minji checks, sounding worried.
Yoongi nods again. He thinks of the pleasant time he’s had with them so far. Of the surprisingly pleasant time he’s been having in Amsterdam, even with the frequent bouts of loneliness that still plague him. Loneliness caused by Yujin himself.
“Yeah,” he says softly. “Just someone from my past.”
They both nod in understanding, probably assuming it’s an ex-girlfriend. Or maybe not. Jimin at least seemed to have an inkling that he was into guys. Perhaps they do too. They don’t ask, however.
“Feel free to rant away if you want,” Jiyeun smiles.
Yoongi looks back down at his phone again. He takes in a deep breath, drawing on all his reserves of courage to message back.
Sorry, I can't
Having too much fun in Amsterdam
He waits to see that the message has been read before quickly deleting the conversation and blocking Yujin’s number before he can change his mind. He feels like vomiting and crying and laughing all at the same time. He does none of those things though, just smiles shakily at the pair of them.
“Thanks” he says. “But I’m good. Better off without them.”
And for the first time in ages, he might actually believe it.
“Guten Tag,” comes the chirpy voice. “Wie geht’s?”
Yoongi looks up from his battered map, pages crumpling in his hands after getting soaked by a sudden summer shower. Yoongi had quickly taken refuse in the nearest café, slopping into a seat and dripping all over the floor. It doesn’t seem to bother the waitress however, who just continues beaming at him. Yoongi guesses they must be paid well to do so.
“Uh, Americano?” he says, hoping that she understands. She gives him a nod and smile and hurries off.
He lays his map out on the table and runs his palms over it, smoothing down the soggy paper. He scans over the points of interest on the map, deciding on where to spend the rest of his day in Munich. He allows himself a small, almost proud smile. He can’t quite believe that he’s made it so far. After leaving Amsterdam he spent a few days in Cologne before travelling south to end up here.
Yoongi wouldn’t say that he’s brimming with enthusiasm every day. He’s not awake at the crack of dawn, eager and excited to get out exploring. And if he spends some of the evenings in his hotel room on his own, he’s fine with that. But overall he feels a change in himself. He may not be full of joy all the time on his travels, may not be entirely happy still, but he feels- different.
He wants to take photos of things he sees. He wants to walk those extra few steps to discover what new sight might be around the next corner. He wants to try new food, even if it means sitting in a restaurant on his own. There are down moments too. Moments where he freaks out over how he’s left things with Yujin, over what may or may not happen when he returns to Deagu. But mostly he’s feeling kind of- content. And that’s good enough for him right now.
His phone vibrates in his pocket and he takes it out, seeing message after message come through from Namjoon. Probably having a meltdown over something Seokjin-related. Maybe Seokjin got a new haircut or some other highly pressing matter. Yoongi remembers the last time that happened and being forced to sit through photos showing off the new cut that Namjoon had found on Facebook.
Yoongi’s brow furrows at the urgency. Oh god, what if something is really wrong? He quickly opens his Skype app, calling Namjoon through that. Namjoon picks up straight away.
“What’s happening? Are you okay?”
“Yes, yes, I’m fine,” Namjoon chuckles. The lightness in his tone immediately makes Yoongi relax, then straight away become annoyed that Namjoon got him so panicked.
“Then why the-“
“Hyung, I think I’ve got you a job for when you finish your trip. Like, a great job.”
“What?” Yoongi says, blinking in confusion. The waitress brings over his coffee and places it down in front of him, and he gives her a small nod of thanks.
“So you remember that Jinnie transferred down to my office from Seoul?”
“Woah, hold up – Jinnie?” Yoongi repeats with mild disgust. There’s a tiny smile on his face regardless as he speaks.
“Okay, moving on,” Namjoon says, sounding severely flustered. “Do you remember?”
“Yes, of course I remember,” Yoongi sighs fondly. “You seemed to think you were destined for each other just because you both grew up in the same city.”
“Well, clearly I was right,” Namjoon replies, tone smug.
“Anyway,” Yoongi says pointedly, trying to move the conversation on to the part about a job.
“Yeah, so, Seokjin’s dad parents still live in Seoul and his dad works for a record label,” Namjoon begins. “I’d mentioned before to Seokjin about you giving up your job to travel and that it was probably a good thing because that place was killing your ambition-“
“Yes it fucking was,” Namjoon interrupts. “You know how much you want to work in music, you just never let yourself because of-“
Namjoon breaks off there, seeming to collect himself. Yoongi’s cheeks burn anyway. He knows exactly what Namjoon was going to say. Namjoon and he never really fell out, but the few times they’d had arguments it was over Yujin. Namjoon thought he was unsupportive, selfish and controlling. Yoongi had lashed out stupidly in response, claiming that he was jealous. To Yoongi, no one ever saw the good side of Yujin. His sense of humour, the little gifts he would sometimes surprise Yoongi with. How sweet he could sometimes be, how passionate he could be. Sure he had flaws, but who didn’t? Yoongi was just glad that Namjoon didn’t hold grudges.
“Anyway, Seokjin says there’s an opening in his dad’s office. It’s nothing much, just an assistant role, and I’ve got to admit it doesn’t pay great, but it’s getting you in there. You could make contacts, get yourself known. They want people really passionate about music and you are, when you let yourself be. This could really be something."
Yoongi’s stunned. He truly doesn’t know what to say. Whatever he was expecting Namjoon to tell him, it wasn’t this. He takes a few moments to gather his thoughts. It does sound great, but- moving to Seoul. Pursuing a job in music. What if it goes wrong? What if he gets his heart broken in an entirely new way all over again.
“Wow, that’s- thanks for letting me know,” Yoongi tells him. “But I’m in Germany. I can’t really go for an interview or anything, and I don’t have a resume put together and-“
“Look, Seokjin’s dad is the big boss there,” Namjoon explains. “A nod from him and you’re in. He just wants to maybe Skype with you to check you’re not in jail or anything.” He pauses and then continues. “I’ve got to be honest, I’m a little disappointed. I thought you’d be more excited for this.”
“I am, just-“ Yoongi sighs heavily. “It’s a lot to take in. Can I let you know?”
Namjoon sighs too, sounding deflated. “I guess. But this is a really big favour Seokjin’s pulling. I mean, he’s never even met you, he’s just trusting my judgment.”
“I know,” Yoongi says quietly. There’s another pause, longer this time before Namjoon speaks again.
“Look,” Namjoon starts, voice soft. “I’m gonna say this once and never bring this guy up again because I don’t want us to fall out. But I get why you’re hesitant. Yujin always made you feel like you were never enough on your own. Please, please, don’t ever believe that. If you want this, you can do it.”
Something twists in Yoongi’s stomach. Guilt and fear and sadness all linked together, twining into a ball that settles heavy within him.
“Okay,” he replies. “Can I let you know first thing tomorrow?”
“Sure,” Namjoon says. “But please, follow what you want. Don’t doubt yourself.”
He sounds eerily like Jimin. Yoongi nods even though Namjoon can’t see him and he catches himself, speaking up.
“I will do. I just- I need a little time,” Yoongi states. “But thank you for this. You, and Seokjin.”
“No problem. Let me know.”
Thoughts circle around Yoongi’s mind for the rest of the afternoon. Could he really do it? Could he move to Seoul and begin afresh? He can’t help but fear things going wrong. What if hates living away from Daegu; what if he has his dream job and is terrible at it. Then what happens? And how could he even afford to set himself up there? He has no savings left after this trip and it’s not like he can ask his parent’s for a loan; they’re not exactly rolling in money and he already owes them. When he realised that he’d have to cover the costs for the trip without the opportunity of splitting costs between two people, his parents generously offered to lend him enough to be paid back in the future.
He knows it’s ridiculous but by the evening it feels like his thoughts are swamping him and after a huge glass of beer Yoongi works up the nerve to text Jimin for advice. He types out a long message, trying to include everything. The great opportunity, but also all the things that could go wrong, so that Jimin can take a balanced view. He expects a text back, but really doesn’t expect for his phone to start ringing. He answers it eagerly.
“Fucking do it,” is the only greeting he gets.
“Yoongi,” Jimin begins, voice unusually stern. “I get that you’ve got a lot of issues with your confidence and about your self-worth. Like, that is clear, and I’m not going to surmise where that probably comes from. But do not fucking let that stop you taking this opportunity.”
“It might go wrong,” Yoongi protests. “And then-“
“It might go right,” Jimin interrupts abruptly. “Then what?”
Yoongi blinks in surprise, not quite sure what to say. Then he has a job working in music like he’s always wanted. Living somewhere new, but exciting too. Making a life for himself without depending on anyone else. It all seems too- impossible.
“Look, that first night we went out, you told me about wanting to work in music. That was the first time you actually looked like you cared about something. Like, your eyes lit up and all that cliché shit. Honestly,” Jimin says gently, allowing a quiet chuckle to escape. “Seriously, please do not talk yourself out of this.”
“What about money?” Yoongi tries weakly.
“What about it? This job pays, right?”
“Yeah, but not much.”
“Okay, Seoul’s pricey, but if you share an apartment it’s not too bad. I manage and I’m a dancer for god’s sake. Not exactly a high roller.” He leaves a gap before adding. “You can even stay with us while you look for somewhere, just until you get on your feet.”
“I owe my parents money too,” he explains.
“Maybe it just takes a little longer to pay them back,” Jimin suggests. “Or- you know, you could stay with me a little longer. Until you’ve got enough saved."
Yoongi feels overwhelmed by the support and encouragement from both Namjoon and Jimin. And from the thought that maybe, just maybe, this could work. It’s terrifying. He really doesn’t want to be a burden on Jimin though, nor on his parents.
“Okay, I’m going to think about it,” Yoongi assures him.
“You better,” Jimin huffs. “You’re more than capable, Yoongi. Stop holding yourself back.”
Yoongi spends that evening in his hotel room, just thinking. He writes down all of his thoughts, every messy one; every positive suggestion and every negative one too. He mulls it all over, until finally, he’s made a decision.
When he wakes up the next morning, the first thing he does is call Namjoon. Namjoon picks up straight away.
“I’m coming home early.”
“I’m going to come home early,” Yoongi repeats. “I’m going to cut out Greece and Turkey, and fly back from Italy.”
“Okay?” Namjoon says, sounding very much confused. “But why? Don’t cut short your dream trip.”
“If I cut out those two countries then I save enough on hotels and spending money to be able to pay back my parents' loan, and also put a little aside for a deposit on an apartment,” Yoongi tells him. “Yeah, this was a dream trip but- well, working in music. That’s my dream life."
“Hang on, wait,” Namjoon starts, voice suddenly sounding full of excitement. “Does this mean you’ll take the job?”
“Yeah, I’ll take it,” Yoongi grins.
Yoongi looks out at the city sprawling below him. He leans over the edge of the wall, lifting up his camera and setting up the best shot before pressing the button. He looks down at the screen, pleased with the result. He wanders around the grounds of Salzburg castle, looking at the information panels despite not understanding a word. He likes simply looking at the building, running his hand over the stone and feeling it’s coolness, even on the stifling summer’s day.
His phone buzzes with a message from Namjoon. Yoongi unlocks his phone and smiles as he looks down at the screen.
Seokjin’s dad really liked you
Called you 'a very pleasant young man'
I’m worried for his dad’s judgement
Yoongi’s smile deepens slightly. On his last night in Munich, he’d held a video call with Seokjin’s dad. He was a lot different to how Yoongi expected. He was very laid back and full of humour, but clearly knew what he wanted at the same time. He laughed a lot but was precise and focused whenever it came to talking about the company and the industry as a whole. It was scary, being grilled for thirty minutes, but he strangely enjoyed it too. He’d almost forgotten how much he loved talking about this stuff.
Almost as if he somehow knew that Yoongi’s phone was open, a message comes through from Jimin. Yoongi keeps smiling as he reads it.
it’s bad to be drunk by 3pm right?
That’s not an argument
I am toasting good news
Hobi got through to the next stage of the dance competition!!
and something else
don't use me as an excuse
Tae and Kook maybe are kind of together
The next message that comes through is a photo. It's a screenshot of Taehyung's instagram. There's a nicely filtered photo of him and Jeongguk. Taehyung's got his arms flung around Jeongguk, pressing a kiss to his cheek whilst Jeongguk sits there, looking mildly disgruntled but pleased too. It's accompanied by a variety of hashtags including #seoulnights #meandmybaby and the straight-to-the-point #myboyfriendisreallyhot.
I think that's more than a maybe
A while passes during which Yoongi gets no reply. He assumes that Jimin's off doing something else so starts wandering around the castle grounds again. He does get a message back eventually though.
Why is wine so good?
Yoongi laughs a little and holds his phone out. He gets some of the stunning scenery in the background as he smiles, teeth showing for once, and snaps a quick picture. He sends it to Jimin before he manages to convince himself otherwise. A response comes back almost instantly.
Also I can’t believe you took a selca
Maybe put the wine down Jimin
Yoongi struggles to stop smiling.
He spends the afternoon of his first day in Austria simply wandering around the streets. He pops into a café at one point for a slice of Sachertorte and a coffee, flicking through his guide book. He’s left his Paris, Amsterdam, and Germany guide books in his hotels along the way and, as dumb as it sounds, he feels somehow lighter in himself after each country. Like discarding the guide book is some sort of symbolic act to show that he’s made it a little further each time, both in terms of travel and mentally too.
He chews thoughtfully on the cake, deciding on what restaurant he’d like to try tonight. He spends a long time debating whether it’s a ridiculous idea to eat Italian in Austria when he’s going to be experiencing authentic Italian fare in a few days time. He decides in the end that too much pizza is never a bad thing.
The next day Yoongi wakes up earlier than usual, strolling around the quiet streets. Salzburg is like something out of a fairy tale to Yoongi, once again incredibly different to every other country he’s experienced so far. He feels like he’s going to take issue with anyone referring to Europe as one homogenous place in the future.
He feels some of that contentment from before, but there’s an added layer too. He feels something like excitement. For the rest of his travels. For what awaits him back in Korea. There’s still moments, of course. Moments of overwhelming panic and fear, consuming him with worries about whether he’s made the right choices. Of whether he’ll be good enough. But he finds that they’re becoming less frequent.
It’s during his second evening in Salzburg when Yoongi gets the message from Jimin. He’s in the middle of tucking into sauerkraut, potatoes, and an unidentified meat when his phone vibrates. He wipes his hand on the napkin being unlocking the screen.
A photo follows, a boarding pass for a flight from Portugal to Venice. The background appears to be that of an airport departure lounge. Yoongi’s stomach flips. He opens up his emails, finding the train ticket he booked online weeks ago and taking a screenshot.
He sends the screenshot which shows in clear detail his train departing tomorrow, route: Salzburg to Venice.
No fucking way
Yoongi steps out of the train station, taking a long look around. This place is insane. In front of him is a large canal, buildings on either side looking as though they are rising straight out of the water. It feels old here, the kind of history of Leonardo da Vinci and Machiavelli and all those other figures that seem a world away from Korea.
He picks up his suitcase, staggering awkwardly down the flight of steps in front of the station until he’s at the water’s edge. He can’t believe that he’s going to get a boat to his hotel. Wait until he tells Namjoon about this. He looks down at his phone, opening the email with the hotel’s address on it. The hotel room he’ll be sharing with Jimin. His heart thumps excitedly just from the thought.
Yoongi looks up and fuck, it’s him. Jimin smiles at him, happy and soft and, oddly, a little shy too. Yoongi smiles back. They both stand there awkwardly, unsure what to do, before Jimin moves in and pulls Yoongi into a hug. Yoongi hugs him back, even chancing the smallest of kisses against his cheek. He blushes instantly from the action and when he pulls away Jimin looks equally flushed.
It hits Yoongi that despite all the texts, the phone calls, the offers of a place to stay in Seoul, they still hardly know each other. It’s all still to come, which is kind of wonderful and nerve-wracking at the same time. But already, Jimin’s somehow become familiar, comforting. As soon as he sees him, Yoongi remembers just exactly why he didn’t want to leave Jimin’s side in that train station in Paris.
"Please get rid of that t shirt," is Yoongi's greeting in response.
"Hey, I totally look like a local in this."
Jimin grins, running a hand through his hair. Yoongi shakes his head, letting a grin cross his own face too. He takes in the sight of Jimin standing there, looking happy in his I heart Paris t shirt. Yoongi's pretty sure he's worn it just to make the elder laugh. The white of the fabric highlights the darker tan of his skin from his time in Spain and Portugal. He looks happy and maybe a little sweaty and just as good as Yoongi remembers.
“You ready?” Jimin asks as he takes hold of Yoongi’s suitcase, waving away the protests from him at the action.
Yoongi looks at Jimin, allowing himself a few more moments to appreciate where he is and who he's with. Finally he nods and smiles again. He feels Jimin’s free hand slip into his, and somehow it just feels natural. They’ve previously only been in each other’s actual presence for a matter of days but somehow Yoongi thinks Jimin was right; there could just be something bigger between them. Yoongi can't wait to find out.
“Ready,” Yoongi says.
He's in Venice. The sun is shining, highlighting the beauty of the old buildings that line the streets. The city is bustling, a labyrinth with something new around each corner. Today he has no commitments, no plans, free to spend his time at leisure in a place he's dreamt of visiting for so long.
And he's happy.