whetherwoman
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Recent works
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The Shortest Night by whetherwoman for thewriterkuku
Fandoms: Spinning Silver - Naomi Novik
24 Dec 2021
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Summary
"I'd danced in a circle holding hands with my friends, the new ones and the old, who'd worked beside me, and at the end the king had come to me and bowed, and together we'd led two lines through the grove, dancing beneath the white branches as they shed their last flowers to rest until the snow." --Spinning Silver
But before the longest day, there is a shortest night.
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Laurie poked his head into the kitchen. Toby's back was to him, multiple pots on the AGA steaming enticingly. "Anything I can do?"
"Not a thing," Toby said, and turned to look Laurie up and down. He smirked. "You'll have to find something else to stress over."
Laurie sighed. "Is it that obvious?"
Toby didn't bother to respond, just gave him a look. Laurie grimaced. He knew he'd been an arse all day, too tightly wound despite Toby's best efforts. But really, what else could he do, when his parents were not only about to meet Toby for the first time, but Toby's mum, as well?
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Doctor Doctor Come And See (tell me what is wrong with me) by whetherwoman
Fandoms: Maritime RPF
25 Mar 2021
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Summary
So a canal walks into an emergency room.
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[Podfic & Art] Getting Over Getting Older All the Time by Amanita_Fierce, B13_MaybeThisTime, Ceewelsh, DelilahMcMuffin, DelphinaBoswell, Elswherefumbling, GoLBCollabs (GodOfLaundryBaskets), kiranerys42, KiwianaPods (kiwiana), Likerealpeopledo, MoreHuman, NeelyO, petrodobreva, RevolutionaryJo, RhetoricalQuestions, ships_to_sail, SparklesMagicLightLove, sunlightsymphony, this_is_not_nothing, unfolded73, whetherwoman, with CompassRose (CompassRose) for Distractivate
Fandoms: Schitt's Creek
02 Mar 2021
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Summary
“Well I’m going to run some errands,” David says, brushing a stray bit of fuzz off his navy blue sweater. “But we’re still on for birthday dinner?”
“Yeah,” Patrick nods. He’s pretty sure David knows the annual birthday surprise party stopped being a surprise after year two or three. David doesn’t even inflict fictional catastrophes on the café as a decoy anymore. But Patrick plays along anyway. In some ways their whole partnership is built on playing along.
OR David and Patrick have been business partners for a decade until, on Patrick's 40th Birthday, everything changes.
[Podfic and Art of "Getting Over Getting Older All the Time," written by Distractivate]
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"How do we forgive ourselves for all the things we did not become?"
- Doc Luben
Ellie grows up and learns about second chances.
Recent series
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Sex Bloopers by cinnaluminum, Distractivate, hollybibble, kiranerys42, nervouscupcakeinspace, orphan_account, Point_of_no_return, reginahalliwell, sullymygoodname, thegrayness, unkindravens, WellSchitt, whetherwoman
Fandom: Schitt's Creek
21 Aug 2020
- Words:
- 42,778
- Works:
- 22
- Bookmarks:
- 51
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Summary
An urban fantasy verse where Patrick Brewer is a fairy specialising in small business and David Rose is David Rose.
- Words:
- 72,272
- Works:
- 2
- Bookmarks:
- 53
Recent bookmarks
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Happy for Now by ScarlettStorm
Fandoms: 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV), 魔道祖师 - 墨香铜臭 | Módào Zǔshī - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù
10 Oct 2021
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Summary
Wei Ying abandons her suitcase to investigate the sleeping situation, already coming up with a hundred reasons not to inconvenience Lan Zhan by stealing half of her fucking bed, and then gets a better look at it.
It’s huge. Wei Ying has seen a king bed before, and this is bigger than that. Is that a California King? Is that what those huge-ass orgy beds are called? There are parking spaces smaller than this bed. Wei Ying has lived in apartments smaller than this bed.
“You know,” Wei Ying says thoughtfully, “I’ll level with you. I was gonna volunteer to sleep on the couch, or steal some pillows and blankets and sleep in the bathtub, but then I saw this monstrosity. Lan Zhan, look at this fucking bed.”
Lan Zhan rests her hands on the room divider, her face softly amused. “I am looking.”
“We could tend a whole herd of sheep on this bed,” Wei Ying says, warming to her subject. “We could cross the Pacific Ocean and weather any storm on this bed. Fuck, Lan Zhan, I could stage an entire community theatre production of Chicago on this bed.”
Or: There was only one bed, but that part's fine, actually.
Bookmarked by whetherwoman
17 Nov 2021
Bookmarker's Notes
Came for the wangxian, stayed for the hilarious and dead on takes on Romancelandia. Also the genuinely good advice on both writing and hotel room cooking.
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“Hello? Yes, this is Trent Crimm, The Independent. I’ve got a bit of an emergency and need Coach Lasso’s mobile.” Trent paused, brow furrowing in irritation. “Well, his son is currently standing in my office, in my newspaper building, which is filled with bloodthirsty journos. Could you make an exception for that?"
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 9,954
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 175
- Kudos:
- 1401
- Bookmarks:
- 263
- Hits:
- 5695
Bookmarked by whetherwoman
01 Nov 2021
Bookmarker's Notes
The rare perfect kid POV fic. I cackled so much.
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Small towns like to think they know everyone's secrets. But Freddy Ventura is done with the NHL and back in Kellynch Falls, Ontario, and no one in town knows what happened before he left fifteen years ago. No one but Ian Elliott.
Bookmarked by whetherwoman
30 Oct 2021
Bookmarker's Notes
hrjdnjcdj I love Persuasion AUs and this is genuinely one of the best I have ever read. Perfectly transposed into the modern era, and SUCH good pining, which is what I really want in a Persuasion AU.
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out to get you (to get you) by iliacquer
Fandoms: 魔道祖师 - 墨香铜臭 | Módào Zǔshī - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù, 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV)
02 Oct 2020
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Summary
In order to kill the Demon of Yiling, assassin Lan Wangji pretends to be courtesan. Falling in love with Wei Wuxian is an unfortunate complication.
(Or: the courtesan-but-actually-assassin!LWJ fic)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 41,571
- Chapters:
- 8/8
- Comments:
- 1502
- Kudos:
- 6999
- Bookmarks:
- 2009
- Hits:
- 76991
Bookmarked by whetherwoman
13 Oct 2021
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a light hidden and singing by occultings (microcomets)
Fandoms: 魔道祖师 - 墨香铜臭 | Módào Zǔshī - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù, 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV)
04 Oct 2021
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Summary
Since he was a child, since Lan Wangji had first become aware of his own alienating effect on others, he has long resigned himself to a loveless marriage. Perhaps even a companionate one, so long as his partner was agreeable and unbothersome and let him have his own space.
He could not have even begun to predict Wei Wuxian.
(A canonverse arranged marriage fic.)
Bookmarked by whetherwoman
05 Oct 2021