varnes
Fandoms
Recent works
-
Tags
Summary
“You’re called the Treasure Chest,” Shane says blankly to the man behind the counter, who is looking at him with a completely neutral expression. His name tag suggests that he is called Ryan. “It’s -- literally every sex shop in the history of sex shops was called The Treasure Chest. I’m pretty sure it’s in the by-laws.”
“The by-laws ... for sex shops?” Ryan asks.
Shane fixes him with a look. He sells crystals, which means he’s a con man, which means he’s a deviant of at least some kind, which means he’s been to a sex shop and he knows exactly what Shane means. “Listen,” Shane says, and then nothing else, because Ryan The Counter Man pulls an arm behind his head to stretch and the sight of his surprisingly beefy arms short-circuits Shane’s brain.
The man blinks patiently at him. “I’m listening,” he says, encouragingly.
OR: An AU in which Ryan runs a crystals store, and Shane is beguiled by him anyway.
-
Tags
Summary
In hindsight, Shane is too old to have thought that friends with benefits was something that the two of them would be able to pull off. He’s had friends with benefits before that worked beautifully, but they were not with people whose jobs were tied up in his own, whose friendships were as closely interwoven into Shane’s everyday life as Ryan’s is. He’d thought these were the very things that could keep it from getting weird, because they were such good buddies, Ryan would be solidly cemented as his pal that nothing could shift him.
This was a miscalculation, on Shane’s part.
--
OR: Lots of friends sleep together casually without it getting weird. Surely Ryan and Shane can, too.
-
Tags
Summary
Shane looks down at the medallion in his hand. He doesn’t know why he’s kept it, all these years. He doesn’t know why he’s kept it so close, always on hand. He should have sold it years and years ago, but he never quite managed to get around to it, and now here he is, in the burning building that is his whole life, with nothing else.
Over the groaning of collapsing wood, he hears Ryan’s voice: “Shane? Shane? Shane!”
He sounds breathless, like he’s been running. Shane kicks down the cracking front door and exits to the street, tucking the medallion into his back pocket. Ryan is standing right in front of the door, as if he had been about to run inside.
“Tell you what, Ryan, you really know how to make an entrance,” he says, brushing ash off the front of his shirt and hoping that he’s managed to keep most of the bitterness out of his voice. “So was ruining my life once just like, not enough for you?”
OR: don't lie to me, you wanted an Indiana Jones AU.
-
Tags
Summary
The sun is too bright and Ryan’s whole body is alight with something that is eating him all the way up from the inside out, but he keeps his eyes open and he makes himself look, and he tells himself that once he finds Shane, he’ll think about it. Once he finds Shane, they’ll make a plan. Once he finds Shane, and only then, he’ll let himself have the thought he’s been swallowing down like bile since he came to: that they didn’t fall.
They were pushed.
OR: Ryan and Shane get cursed by a ghost, and now they can't be not-touching. It's ... not great.
-
Tags
Summary
The problem is that Shane is from the midwest. They don’t talk about feelings in Schaumburg. They talk about the weather and Chicagoland gang warfare and who in the county has the best backyard hockey pond in the winter. That’s it. That all they’re interested in.
Shane thinks maybe it’s like exposure therapy. You ease your toe in, then your foot, then the rest of you. Surely talking about your feelings with your ... television co-host was the same.
Or: I’m a believer in you, Shane thinks, but has the good sense not to say on camera.
Series
- Part 2 of you and me and the ghosts make three
Recent series
-
- Words:
- 16,752
- Works:
- 2
- Bookmarks:
- 87
Recent bookmarks
-
only happy accidents [PODFIC] by bessyboo for wingedwords (gunpowderandlove)
Fandoms: Buzzfeed Unsolved (Web Series)
31 Dec 2018
Tags
Summary
In hindsight, Shane is too old to have thought that friends with benefits was something that the two of them would be able to pull off. He’s had friends with benefits before that worked beautifully, but they were not with people whose jobs were tied up in his own, whose friendships were as closely interwoven into Shane’s everyday life as Ryan’s is. He’d thought these were the very things that could keep it from getting weird, because they were such good buddies, Ryan would be solidly cemented as his pal that nothing could shift him.
This was a miscalculation, on Shane’s part.
--
OR: Lots of friends sleep together casually without it getting weird. Surely Ryan and Shane can, too.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 17
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 7
- Kudos:
- 15
- Bookmarks:
- 3
- Hits:
- 399
Bookmarked by varnes
01 Jan 2019
-
- Words:
- 232,441
- Works:
- 6
- Bookmarks:
- 264
Bookmarked by varnes
18 Dec 2018
-
Tags
Summary
“Call if you need me,” Arthur says, “and I’ll come.”
Series
- Part 1 of Call and Answer
Bookmarked by varnes
29 Nov 2018
-
- Words:
- 91,413
- Works:
- 4
- Bookmarks:
- 114
Bookmarked by varnes
25 Nov 2018
-
Let's just forget the Hollywood rules by tearupthesky for blurhawaii
Fandoms: Buzzfeed Unsolved (Web Series)
01 Jan 2018
Tags
Summary
Ryan rolls his chair closer to Shane. "Did you hear that, man?" he says under his breath. "That dog hates me, did you hear it growl at me? It almost took my fucking hand off! It could smell the curse. It recognized me with its primordial wolf senses."
"It's a fucking labradoodle," Shane says.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,530
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 34
- Kudos:
- 506
- Bookmarks:
- 77
- Hits:
- 3629
Bookmarked by varnes
07 Oct 2018