or someone that i used to be, or someone that i will be, or someone that i am right now by princesapollobollo
Fandoms: Video Blogging RPF, Minecraft (Video Game)
03 Dec 2020
You sit in a cliff next to the sea, at night, and wonder how terrible you could have possibly been to make everyone so uncomfortable whenever you show up. It’s not the same with everyone, you think as you trace the rocky jagged edge, and isn’t that almost worse? You think about Fundy, bitter, angry, sad, and even if you can’t really remember why you feel something twist inside. You think about Phil, warm but watching with haunted eyes whenever he thinks you’re not looking. You think about Tommy looking at you like a stranger.
24 Oct 2020
“I don’t know what you want from me,” you tell him, because you’re confused and tired of lying and being afraid. He looks at you for a long moment and then he gets up and walks up to you. You’re the same height, Huaisang barely a bit taller than you, but it feels like he’s looming over you right now.
“I want to know if you’re going to kill my brother again,” he says, and his mouth twists and his fists clench. He would beat you in hand-to-hand combat if he tried to jump you, you think, but you’re carrying Hensheng, and he doesn’t have his saber. Huaisang doesn't play if the odds aren't fully in his favor.
22 Sep 2020
Nie Huaisang stumbles into one of the gardens that are peppered throughout Koi Tower and sighs, because the fresh air is a relief, but he also has no idea where his room is, and his head is spinning more and more. Fuck, what do they put in the wine here?
A voice rings out behind him.
“Huaisang?” Nie Huaisang closes his eyes. “What are you doing here?” Of course, he sounds concerned. Huaisang fights down the urge to scream. He also sounds a bit surprised, but Huaisang can’t tell if it’s genuine or yet another accent of deception.
“Yao-ge,” he says, and he’s grateful that the wobble in his voice can be justified with the alcohol. He turns around, the waver and stumble not even a pretense, and gives Jin Guangyao his best sheepish, foolish smile. “I got lost.”
17 Sep 2020
Jin Ling keeps the guqin untouched in a corner of his room for three months after Guanyin Temple.
It’s not like he’s not busy; even with the support he has from his uncle, running a sect is a nightmare. It’s exhausting. He barely has time to think.
It’s one night after he wakes up from a nightmare, the phantom feeling of unyielding string against his neck and the last screams of his uncle ringing in his ears, that he gets up and goes to look at it.
Or, the one where Jin Guangyao taught Jin Ling how to play the guqin.
14 Sep 2020
“Fine,” Jiang Cheng says, shooting him a glance that he hopes says you’re being ridiculous, and he crosses his arms over his chest. “You can ask me, then.”
Jin Guangyao blinks, twice.
“I can help you.” Jiang Cheng refuses to blush.
“Um,” Jin Guangyao says, the most thrown off he’s ever seen him. He feels himself flush despite his best efforts.