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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    The Dowlings miraculously need a nanny and a gardener at the same time, and Aziraphale suggests they flip for it. Crowley takes one moment to picture Aziraphale nannying anyone and calls dibs. It’s not that Aziraphale’s terrible with humans, he’s just, well. Terrible with humans. Truly, truly terrible.

    He doesn’t want to deal with Aziraphale getting metaphorically guillotined or kicking up security’s paranoia, basically. A gardener can be a little odd, and no one will notice or care. Except Warlock, perhaps, as the only other person with any real reason to spend much time out on the lawn, but Warlock’s the one they want noticing so that’ll be fine, Crowley’s sure.

    Even if it does make him cringe a little, leaving Aziraphale in charge of the plants.

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    23 Jul 2019

  2. Public Bookmark 99

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    “We…we are best friends, right?”

    “Yes,” Crowley said slowly. His eyebrows were still raised. “I thought that was obvious.”

    “And…and best friends care about each other. They love each other,” Aziraphale said.

    “Yes.”

    Aziraphale frowned. “But kissing is off-limits.”

    “Angel, if you’re asking if you can kiss me –”

    “Absolutely not,” Aziraphale said quickly. “It was merely a question that arose out of curiosity, it has nothing to do with us at all.”

    That was, of course, a big fat lie.

     

    Or in other words, a 5+1 style fic in which Aziraphale and Crowley are Very Bad at reading signals and communicating.

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    12 Jul 2019

  3. Public Bookmark 79

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    Crowley hadn’t meant to fall. It had been an accident, the first time, when all he’d done was hang around the wrong sort and ask a couple questions, and then suddenly he was burning, his soul on fire and his wings searing off his back as he plummeted down to the flames of Hell – well, as much as you could plummet when there wasn’t really an up or down. He’d reached out as he fell, grasping at the inky blackness that was everything that existed back then, hoping that somehow, miraculously, he’d catch something to slow his inevitable descent, but of course, there had been nothing. He’d fallen, and there had been nothing to stop him, and he was told that it was all his fault.

    The second time he fell had also been an accident. He’d been doing his job, really, slithering around in Eden after being sent up by high office to cause trouble. Teaching the humans the difference between right and wrong, and tempting them to do the wrong thing. He’d done his job, getting them kicked out of Eden, and that was supposed to have been the end of it.

    Hardly his fault there was an angel there with him.

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    12 Jul 2019

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    Because Crowley has a vexing habit of being right in matters such as these, the Glorious End does come exactly as he said it would—with Heaven and Hell joining forces to sack the Mortal Realm. And while most would probably have expected it to be inked into the Great Plan with grace and blood and tears, it's actually typed, with clear bullet points and headings, in the font Papyrus.

    "We're out of time, angel," Crowley says quietly, but it echoes in every part of Aziraphale like the Divine Word. "Has to be now."

    Series
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    09 Jul 2019

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    From the kinkmeme: "rape fantasy, Aziraphale might have fantasized a fair amount about Crowley tempting him quite forcefully, with lots of talk about how he'll be tainted, how he'll Fall just like he did so long ago. When they get together post-Apocalypse, Aziraphale shares his fantasies with Crowley and he's happy to indulge them."

    Established relationship, feat. consent, negotiation, safewords, and cuddling after.

     

    They didn’t choose a particular time or place, but that Friday, when Aziraphale let himself into his upstairs flat after a long day of refusing to sell a single book to find Crowley sprawled in the most comfortable armchair, he just sort of knew.

    “Angel,” said Crowley by way of greeting.

    “Demon,” said Aziraphale, trying hard to remember the polite, distant way he’d addressed Crowley several thousand years ago. Smiling was right out, he knew that much. He could already feel his breath quickening.

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    02 Jul 2019